#Something about the genuine insanity in there something about being driven to it

[caterpillarinacave]

I have so many feelings about Roman Torchwick

[kaluaah]

rating attack on men cock with insane writers block

i wish you could add music to posts..id add brat

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

Levi Ackerman 𖹭

Genitalia: Levi’s is on the smaller side, but it’s perfectly proportioned with a slight curve. He’s meticulous about grooming, so it’s always pristine. He’s the type to keep things tidy and controlled, just like his whole persona. Dynamic: Levi’s definitely a top. He’s assertive and precise, and he likes being in control. However, if he really trusts someone and feels relaxed, he might be open to switching. It’s not his default mode, but he can make exceptions.

Erwin Smith 𖹭

Genitalia: Erwin’s is thick and commanding, reflecting his leadership qualities. It’s not just big in size; it’s impressive in presence. He carries himself with confidence, and his genitalia is no different. Dynamic: Erwin is a classic top. He’s used to being in charge and taking control, which extends to his intimate life. He’s confident and decisive, and he knows exactly what he’s doing. You won’t find him hesitating or second-guessing in this area.

Armin Arlert 𖹭

Genitalia: Armin’s is average in size, but it’s sensitive and responsive. He’s a bit self-conscious about it, often overthinking things. Despite that, he’s genuinely sweet and attentive. Dynamic: Armin tends to be a bottom. He’s a bit shy and prefers to let someone else take the lead. However, with the right partner and when he’s feeling more confident, he’s definitely open to switching things up.

Porco Galliard 𖹭

Genitalia: Porco’s is medium-sized and notably thicker. He’s quite proud of it and knows how to use it. It’s not something he hides or downplays; he’s pretty confident about it. Dynamic: Porco is a switch, but he leans more towards topping. He likes being in control and taking charge, though he’s not opposed to switching it up if the mood and the partner are right.

Miche Zacharius 𖹭

Genitalia: Miche’s is notably big, almost intimidating, just like his overall presence. It’s impressive in size and perfectly matches his strong, authoritative demeanor. Dynamic: Miche is definitely a top. He’s assertive and commanding in all aspects of his life, and that includes his intimate moments. He takes charge and knows how to assert his dominance.

Eren Yeager 𖹭

Genitalia: Eren’s is average-sized but has a slight curve. He’s not shy about it and is quite confident. His more intense and driven personality carries over into his intimate life. Dynamic: Eren is a switch, but he leans towards being a top. His energy and assertiveness make him naturally inclined to take control, but he’s also open to switching when he’s in a more relaxed or trusting situation.

Jean Kirstein 𖹭

Genitalia: Jean’s is well-sized and nicely shaped. He’s confident without being arrogant about it. He knows it’s good, and he’s comfortable with himself. Dynamic: Jean is primarily a top. He’s assertive and confident, enjoying being in control. However, he’s also open to switching if he’s with someone he really cares about or feels a strong connection with.

Connie Springer 𖹭

Genitalia: Connie’s is average and straightforward. It’s not particularly standout, but it’s reliable and does the job just fine. He’s easygoing and doesn’t make a big deal out of it. Dynamic: Connie is a total switch. He’s laid-back and goes with the flow, so he’s flexible about his role in bed. He’s comfortable switching things up based on the mood or his partner’s preferences.

Zeke Yeager 𖹭

Genitalia: Zeke’s is bigger than average, and he knows it. He’s a bit cocky about it, which fits his personality. He’s not shy about showing it off. Dynamic: Zeke is a top with a bit of a manipulative edge. He likes being in control and pulling the strings. He enjoys being the one in charge and directing the action.

Reiner Braun 𖹭

Genitalia: Reiner’s is thick and solid, just like his physique. It’s well-matched to his strong and imposing build. Dynamic: Reiner is a switch but tends to be more comfortable as a top. His natural strength and dominant personality make him more inclined to take the lead, though he can definitely switch things up if the situation calls for it.

Bertholdt Hoover 𖹭

Genitalia: Bertholdt’s is larger than he might realize, but he’s a bit shy about it. He’s not fully aware of how impressive it is, but it’s definitely noteworthy. Dynamic: Bertholdt is mostly a bottom. He’s a bit reserved and can be shy, but with the right partner who can boost his confidence, he might be open to switching things up.

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

m so sorry my writing is bleh as heck!! writing with nails is my hell. do not ask for floch i dont write about 1 inch shrivelled yucky cocks.

ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐ִֶָ𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ🐇་༘࿐

[pretty-little-mind33]

Tangerine x fem!reader

Summary: You try and take Tangerine to the movies to cheer him up.

Prompt: "Watch where you're going! You almost took my eye out with that thing!" - "I've never heard a bigger lie."

~ for you my lovely @j23r23! love you and thank you for always supporting my writing! ~

TANGERINE MASTERLIST

BLURB MASTERLIST

When Tangerine is in a bad mood, he usually manages to turn everyone else in a bad mood.

This evening, he's being particularly moody as he mopes around your shared apartment, feeling crushed that he and Lemon lost one of their big jobs to some rival assassin.

You're curled up on the couch, scrolling through your phone as he paces in front of you, muttering curses and insults at his rival. Lemon is in his room, listening to some music. He seemed fine with not doing the job, but his brother is very obviously spiraling from not having something to do this evening.

"Tan," you say, pulling Tangerine's attention to you, and then you smile a genuinely happy smile. "Wanna go see a movie with me?" you ask, to cheer him up. 

Tangerine looks at you like you're insane. "No," he deadpans. 

You narrow your eyes at him, only slightly hurt. "No? Then what? You're gonna complain uselessly the entire evening like a loser?" you laugh lightheartedly.

Tangerine's cheeks turn bright red. "Fuckin' pardon me?"

You stand and smile kindly at him again, rushing up the stairs to your room to change and call to him, "Be ready to leave in ten minutes or I'm taking Lemon instead."

Your threat clearly works because soon, you're standing in the line for popcorn. Tangerine is holding the tickets for the movie in his hand and he intends on paying for your popcorn too—even though he doesn't outwardly look happy about it. 

While you ramble on and on about what kind of candy you think he would want considering he'd turned down popcorn, a teenage couple, dressed in costumes for some new superhero movie, almost bumps into him and the boy's prop almost smacks Tangerine in the eye.

He groans and then grabs the boy's arm just as he almost hits you. 

"Oi, watch where yer goin'! Ya almost took m'eye out with that thing!" Tangerine exclaims.

You frown, sensing the couple's fear as they stumble away. You hold Tangerine's forearm, calming him down. "Alright there, barky," you tease with a smaller smile, "I don't think they meant to almost hit you."

Almost hit you, Tangerine wants to correct you because he didn't give a shit if that thing had hit him.

He eyes lose any hint of violence, however, when he hears your voice but then his eyebrow shoots up in question. 

"Barky?"

You laugh, not meaning it badly. You never do. "Yeah. You're like a guard dog sometimes. Although, you're always all bark and never any bite." 

Not with you, he thinks again but he doesn't say it aloud as he just huffs and walks closer to the counter to order your snacks.

Tangerine finds the movie incredibly irritating and he almost walks out multiple times. The only thing keeping him with you is you. The way you laugh along to the corny jokes, the way you squeeze his hand sometimes when something a little scary happens during the action, and the way you'll look so captivated by the romance scenes.

As the movie continues, Tangerine's attention has turned to you. He's barely watching the screen now as he finds you much prettier than anyone on the screen. 

Once the movie is finished and you're walking back to his car (because yes, he'd also driven you here), he comments, "If I'd known that tosser was in it, I wouldn' hav' gone," Tangerine snarls.

"Who?" you ask curiously, looping your arm in his as you keep him close. Tangerine looks at you and he sees how you're shivering. Without a word, he drapes his jacket over your shoulders and continues the conversation as if nothing happened, his arm still wrapped around your shoulder like a teenage boy who'd just made a move.

You smile and pull his jacket closer around you. It smells like him. 

"That Ryder prick," Tangerine says, "He's so fuckin' unbearable."

You pause and feel warmth in your cheeks as Tangerine continues and adds, "I know you think he's hot and all—"

"I never said that— I don't think he's hot!" you snap immediately, defending yourself.

Tangerine laughs and rolls his eyes. "I 'av never heard a bigger lie," he says and pokes your cheek, grinning wolfishly, "you were practically drooling all over yourself."

Your heart skips and you look at him, retorting, "and how would you know? Why were you looking at me during the movie, Tan?"

He knows you've caught him and he pauses, finally laughing. "Okay, fuckin' touché, darlin'." Tangerine shrugs and only pulls you closer to him.

"You're way more interesting than some stupid movie anyway, can ya blame me?"

Tangerine is relaxing, his tense demeanor from earlier in the evening has vanished and you smile. This is what you wanted. You feel successful in cheering him up and making him forget about his damned work for a while. You like his company and you smile up at him. 

"Okay, rate the movie out of ten," you say, grinning.

"Three, because I had to watch that arsehole think he can act," Tangerine says and just as you open your mouth to protest, his lips hit your temple and you tense, a familiar warmth spreading inside your chest. "But then ten because I got to spend some time with my favorite girl."

tags: @tansgirlfriend, @brokeaesthetic, @earth-elemental18, @lqrlei, @princesssunderworld, @longlivedelusion

[soobibabe]

"no" strings attached

pairings: choi yeonjun + fem reader trope: friends with benefits (smut, eventual fluff)

warnings: dom!yeonjun, penetrative/unprotected sex, oral, throat fucking, hair pulling (?), degrading, praise, rough/jealous sex, a little alcohol consumption but they’re sober for the most part, fingering, slapping (once, and it’s nothing crazy) lmk if i missed anything else.

You knew exactly what you were doing when you found yourself taking the alcohol poured down your throat by Kim Sunwoo in the middle of a party Yeonjun invited you to. You made sure to down every last drop, maintaining eye contact with Sunwoo while you swallowed every last drop he gave you. Why? Well, simply put the man you were here for was too busy chatting it up with other girls in front of your face to pay you any attention.

Of course, don't play these games lightly. He knew this, so why bother trying you in the first place?

"Where'd you learn to do that pretty girl?" sunwoo asked, genuinely in awe at your ability to drink all of it without gagging. You turn your head to the site of the pair of eyes you felt glaring at you the entire time. Yeonjun hadn't taken his eyes off you since the second you made your way over to the group of men playing beer pong, joining the team with Heesung, Soobin, and Sunwoo himself.

"Oh you know, practice from game punishments and stuff" You tilt your head mid-sentence, looking up at the taller figure through batted eyelashes, knowing fully that it would drive Yeonjun insane had he seen you, which, he had.

"How about we got to know each other better tonig-" Sunwoo begins, but Yeonjun appears beside you lifting his right hand to rest it on Sunwoo's shoulder. He maneuvers the left one to slide around your waist.

"Sorry bro but y/n's got something else planned tonight," Yeonjun says through a smile coated in faux pity, causing Sunwoo's to fade.

You slip out of Yeonjun's hold on you, stepping closer to the boy in front of you "Ah right, I forgot about that. But I had so much fun with you wonie, how about we continue where we left off tomorrow, hm?”

You don't see it, but Yeonjun's eyes widen then fall into a daggered stare upon hearing the nickname you gave to the man in front of you.

"Tomorrow sounds perfect, lets exchange numbers" Without warning, Yeonjun grabs your wrist "Y/n it's pretty late do you think? How about I drive you back to your dorm?" before you can respond, he's already dragging delicately escorting you toward the exit of the frat house. "Hey, what are you doing? I didn't wanna leave yet," you complain, but you know this is exactly what you wanted. You wanted his blood to boil. You wanted him to come crawling to you.

He doesn't respond to you but instead continues pacing forward in the direction of his car. He reaches out to open the car door, loosening his grip on your hand to allow you to enter the vehicle.

Once youre inside, he wastes no time, buckling you into your seat immediately.

"You're so childish jun. What? I can't even catch up with friends now?" he scoffs. A chuckle erupts through his pretty lips. "That's how you catch up with all your friends?" his smile drops when he faces you. When his eyes meet yours, they go dark. Like he's a totally different person.

He shuts the door, walking around the front of the car to meet his seat. The drive home is silent. You're scared of what would happen if you provoke him any further.

You're lost in thought, wondering if what you did with Sunwoo was too much. Looking out the window, you snap out of your daze, realizing you're not being driven to your campus. You're in the street of Yeonjuns apartment.

Upon arrival, you follow Yeonjuns lead into his apartment. "What is this?' you ask, referring to the fact that you're at his place instead of your own.

"Would you rather your dorm mates hear you screaming and begging me to go easy on you through the thin walls?" he turns to meet you. "You want them to hear you get fucked by your best friend? Don't want to keep me as your little secret anymore?"

He says it all in one breath, nearing closer to you with each syllable that leaves his lips. The same lips are clashed with yours not even a second after, not giving you that second to formulate a counter.

His tongue dances with yours for what feels like an eternity. He's breaking the first rule of your 'no strings attached' agreement, no kissing. But here in this moment, you never want it to end.

Your back presses on the wall he pushes you against and he breaks the kiss to lift your thighs, he wants them wrapped around him. "This want you wanted?" he questions.

"I want you, Yeonjun." you state as the desire for him engulfs you.

"Slutty girls like you don't know what they want. You know that more than anyone don't you? Weren't you just ready to fuck that guy? What's his name? Sunoo? Sunie? doesn't matter. I'll make you forget all about him, baby"

At this point, youre desperate for Yeonjun to touch you. You know he's stalling. Know he's making you wait on purpose, so you do the next best thing. "It's Sunwoo." you correct him.

Now you've done it. He didn't think you'd have it in you. Yet here you are.

His hold on you stiffens, carrying you like you weigh nothing away from the doorway into his room. He throws you into the bed, his usual gentleness gone. "Take your top off." he requests, leaving you in just your bra and mini-skirt.

"Let's put your dirty mouth to better use, yeah?" he unbuckles his belt, peeling each layer off in one swift motion. "Suck."

You're never not intimidated by the sight of his dick. It's thick, but still long. Every time you take him, the stretch makes you feel like a virgin all over again.

You wrap your hands around his length, taking the tip into your mouth and drawing circles around it with your tongue making him groan. a breathy, low 'fuck' comes from him.

"Take it. All of it. You've been begging me to fuck you all night like a whore, so suck it like you mean it." He scolds you when he realizes you're teasing him by your own will.

"Youre just so big," you say, looking up at him with your bottom lip tucked under your teeth. "Mmm really? Dumb girl, you should've thought about that earlier." he looks down at you with a faux smile.

"This won't do," he grabs a fistful of your hair, using his other hand over yours to guide his cock to your mouth. "Open." and you obey.

He shoves himself all the way into your mouth, slowly pushing down your throat. Tears well up in your eyes when he begins to thrust, trying not to gag around him. "Taking me so well, like you were made for me. You're all mine, you know that?" you attempt to nod.

His strokes become rougher as he continues. His hand in your hair suddenly stills when he feels himself approach a high. Is he a masochist? "Get on your fours. Ass up and head down just how I like it".

"Gonna fill you up so good," he tugs your skirt off, "Remind you who you belong to. You want that?" he says before he bends down to kiss you. Youre dumbfounded by the sudden gesture. "Of course you do, my pretty slut"

You do as he demands, switching positions. His finger finds its way to your sopping hole "This wet from just sucking me off, pretty?"

He thrusts two fingers into you simultaneously at a rapid pace, already stimulating all your sweet spots. "Fuck, so good junnie." you cry out, earning a smirk from him.

He tips down to your core, licking a long strip from your clit to your entrance causing you to squirm. "Don't run from me baby, you're the one who wanted this"

"Gonna make you feel so good, nobody else can make you feel like this can they?" he asks, already knowing your answer. "Only you, j-jun, fuck" you moan, losing yourself in the pleasure.

He rips himself away from you, breaking the contact that was bringing you close to what felt like a high.

"Do you think he can satisfy you like this, y/n?" he interrogates.

"Not sure, I'm a hands-on learner. Should I find out?" you retort, eliciting exactly what you wanted from him.

You know exactly how to rile him up. He grabs your hips, placing a slap on the round of your ass, inducing a whine from you. He's sure to rub the sting, not really wanting to hurt you.

Unannounced, he slams the entirety of his cock into you. "Gonna fucking ruin you." he smiles, pulling you up by your neck to press your arched back to his chest. "Tell me how good it feels, baby" he whispers into your neck.

"S-so fucking g-good, fuck!" you whine when he softly bites down on your shoulder.

He drops you back onto the mattress, rolling you over onto your back. "So pretty when you're fucked out like this. his thrusts become ruthless, pounding into you mercilessly.

You can't help but moan his name, "You think he can make you feel this good baby? Think he can fuck you like I do?" he asks, but you both already know the answer.

You're too distracted by the waves of pleasure coursing through you to give him a coherent response.

A light slap lands on your cheek, "I asked you a question, did I not?" his fingers dip to your folds, giving stimulation to your neglected clit. "Use your big girl words, yeah?"

"No j-jun nobody else can -- fuck - make me feel the way you do." he smiles, content with your remark.

He bends to hover closer to you, showering your neck and lips with feathery kisses, one after the other.

His rhythm doesn't falter, fucking you relentlessly and drawing you near your climax. His attention drifts from your face to your lower torso, in awe at the bulge formed on your abdomen from how far he's hitting.

"Shit, do you feel me here?" he inquires, using his free hand to press against it. The stimulation from his cock being pushed impossibly closer to your sweet spot pulls you into nirvana.

"Please, Yeonjun I'm gonna-" you're interrupted by the force of your orgasm crashing through you, making a mess on the man you're wrapped so snuggly around.

"Fucking hot. God, I wish I recorded that" he practically whines at the sight of your release coating his supple skin. You'd never cum that hard before.

"That's it, keep moaning my name like that, pretty," he orders when you chant his name as he fucks you through your orgasm. "that's it, good girl"

"Cumming" He reaches in for a kiss again, stilling his hips as he empties his load in you, "Fuck"

He drops his weight onto you, careful to not let his (still hard) cock slip out as he flips your bodies over so that you're on top of him.

There's a comfortable silence between you as he embraces you tightly. You love how there's never an awkward moment when you're with him.

You raise your head to meet his eyes already admiring your face. "So beautiful" he whispers. It felt so intimate, so pure you can't help the blush that creeps up your cheeks.

"You're cute when you're jealous" you tease. His brows furrow, shifting his gaze to his hand as though it's the most interesting thing he'd ever encountered. "I'm not jealous." he mumbles flatly.

"Ah I see, then I guess it's okay if I go on that date with-" the same hand he was so absorbed in a second ago is now covering your mouth.

His eyes pierce into yours once more. "Think very conscientiously about your next few choices of words because I'm afraid the consequences this time will not be as clement as the last."

You giggle, prying his hand off you. "Don’t threaten me with a good time.”

“You’re annoying” he tries to conceal his smile, but gives in and tickles you instead. You both sit up too fast, suddenly reminded of the spot in which your bodies are connected.

“Fuck,” you groan in unison, laughing at the stupidity of the situation.

He pulls out but refuses to let go of you it seems. “i want to stay like this forever. stay with you” he whispers, catching you off guard but you don’t show it.

“Me too, jun.” you return his soft, dorky smile. “i love you” you whisper back.

His eyes beam at you, taken aback yet ecstatic as a result of your unexpected honesty, “I love you too. So so much more than you know” those same sparkling eyes look at you with tears welling in them.

“Can we end this stupid agreement and make this real?” you ask timidly.

“Yes, please god yes. I’ve waited, so so long. Can i be your boyfriend, y/n?”

“Absolutely, choi yeonjun.”

A/N: i started this when i was horny and let’s just say i wrote the other half during pnc >.< hope you enjoy this monstrosity! i love you soobination

find my masterlist here

© all rights reserved soobibabe on tumblr. do not cross-post, copy or translate etc.

[taglist] @himenaayo-blog @matcha-binz @inkigayocamman

[prettyboykatsuki]

kaiser with a kind motherly manager who says "you did great!" or "good job!" after a successful interview/press appearance and it sounds like she's praising a dog who just learned a new trick. kind of baby talking him just a little without realizing and he gets so bricked up and immediately bothered by it that he like. speed walks out of the room.

its so bad for him KSDHFJ

its like. the important part of this is that he really kind of rejects the relationship at first i think. kaiser is such a huge pain to deal with and his agency has bounced him through like several diff managers and they've all been driven completely insane by him - men and women. and so they take a different approach and instead of giving someone more professional, they have u step up to the plate

and you're like. an impenetrable wall. you have some experience with kids (maybe your own, maybe just childcare) and it's enough that it makes you this like source of complete Calm. its so easy for people to get annoyed with kaiser

its on purpose too. he knows exactly what buttons to push to make people angry and it's rare someone can get under his skin very sincerely. he figures you'll be just like the rest of them and give up on trying to be his friend or reason with him eventually. they all do.

but. But. you're Maternal in a way that makes kaiser feel like a kid throwing a tantrum any time he does or says things. no matter what kind of insults or berating he does you're just Firm. basically gentle parenting him. AND you're persistent about him.

one time, very much joking, kaiser does something you ask the first time and you practically Beam at him. and maybe just as a reaction, you sort of ruffle his hair and smile with your eyes crinkled and go "see? wouldn't it be nice if you could be a good boy like this all the time?"

instant hard-on. fuck fuck fuck fuck his life fuck everything. thankfully you dont notice but he does and he thinks about ending it all.

and then. subconsciously. he does get just the SLIGHTEST bit more agreeable. just a little tiny bit. and everytime he acts half decent you do the thing again. you really are very Motherly. you're an older woman so he guesses it makes sense but sometimes the way you tell him you'll treat him to dinner after a good match makes him feel the full extent of it. its very mother and her troubled son and he is Less Against that then he should be. the lines are sooooo blurry.

he wants to fight it so bad and he tries so hard but he has a wet dream about you in a way that makes him feel like he's regressed. if he was normal he could pass it off as a crush but the dream is of you letting him suck your tits while you give him a handjob and he stops being able to deny what it is and it plagues and ruins his life.

i think he comes onto you eventually. and it is genuinely in an attempt to push you away and make you disappointed. but then you flip it on him and give him a sexual favor and pull his pants back up for him afterwards and pat his thigh and he's so panicky and Oh No

its so bad JKDFHFSJKD. its so so bad you ruined him and he also becomes possesive over you in a distinct way. it's so misplaced like he's proving freud very right because you're not his mom. you're not.

but the kind of entitlement and the way you are the object of his sexual desire can only be attributed to some weird mother son shit. mind you not a mommy kink. there's not really a roleplay to it for him. he just kind of blatantly wants you to mother him. and it's so so so bad. he's such a freak

[logansargeantsbabymom]

Too Good To Say Goodbye pt8

Logan Sargeant x Fem!Reader, Lando Norris x Fem!Reader

A/N: First I wanted to say thank you to everyone for all the kind messages I've been receiving, I keep rereading them and tearing up. It lets me know that there are genuine people in the world and that I can take a few days or a week to finish a request. Sorry this part took a bit longer due to the short break I took, I'll try my best to get the request I have out in a timely manner!

warnings: cursing

part 1 I part 2 I part 3 I part 4 I part 5 I part 6 I part 7 I part 8 I part 9 I part 10

Follow my instagram account (THATS STRICTLY FOR THIS BLOG) for updates on when i post and fun stuff like that!

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F1 Masterlist

A drive to Lily's that normally would've taken 25 minutes depending on traffic only took Lando 10 and I think the way he is flooring it right now has been the fastest he's ever driven in his life. I mean anyone could've easily mistaken him for Max Verstappen in this moment and rightfully so, my bastard of an ex-boyfriend and baby dad is an absolute dick for what he just did.

I get being upset that I'm pregnant and that my boyfriend right now is treating me 10x better than you ever will but actually spoiling the gender for us AND spoiling the fact that I'm carrying twins is on another level of insanity.

When we dropped Yelena off, Lily had told us she wasn't going to be expecting a baby pick up anytime soon. Which by the way, God bless Lily for just being able to drop whatever she had planned for today to be able to watch my kid while Lando and I dealt with baby daddy drama.

The blaring sound of a ringtone is what yanked me from deep in my thoughts. I picked up the phone to look at the caller ID before answering and placing it on speaker "Carlos, now is really not a good time". I said while running a hand over my face to try and ease some tension building up.

"Logan's at my place." Lando's knuckled gripped the steering wheel tighter at the mention of his name.

"Why is he there and why does he need to have a conversation with you present?" I questioned

"He told me to tell you and Lando to meet him here to talk to you but wants me present and he thinks Lando is going to kill him." Carlos started, doubt coating his voice as he talked.

"I FUCKING AM" Lando screamed as he pressed down on the gas pedal harder.

I’ve seen Lando upset and even angry before but what I was seeing from him right now wasn’t either of those, this was pure hatred. Lando was seeing pure red in his vision as he was driving, almost hit a pedestrian (who shouldn’t have crossed but people don’t pay attention to signs).

Now that Lando knows he has to book it to Carlos’ place instead of Logan’s he makes a sharp turn, which could’ve easily flipped the car if you weren’t as much of a skilled driver as Lando is.

"BABE! I KNOW YOU'RE MAD AND ALL BUT DON'T CRASH THIS CAR AND KILL ALL 4 OF US!" I screamed as I grabbed ahold of the center console

Something about the fear in my voice as I screamed at Lando seemed to get through this barrier of red he had coating him and he seemed to ease up on the steering wheel and drove a bit more safer.

-

Arriving at Carlos house, we were greeted with Carlos standing out front. Lando and I got out of the car and started making our way to the front door of Carlos' luxurious house while Carlos started walking towards us, meeting us halfway.

"Ay, I talk to Logan. He meant no harm pero I think he did. He is in the living room." Carlos said as he patted Lando's tense shoulder before turning his attention to me. "I'm so sorry Logan did what he did. I feel so bad but just know that I'm here for you with whatever you need." Carlos added while he pulled me into a hug.

I've always loved Carlos' hugs because of the level of comfort they always brought was just unmatched. If you're sad, have a Carlos hug, if you're happy, have a Carlos hug, if you don't want a hug, have a Carlos hug. Moral of the story: a Carlos hug can fix everything. Well, almost everything.

"Thank you Carlos, I really needed that hug. I just-" The sound of glass breaking is what caused me to stop mid-sentence and I turned to look over at my boyfriend, only to find him no where in sight.

My heart dropped to my feet when I was met with no sign of my boyfriend and all I could hear from a distance was arguing. Carlos wasted no time in spinning on his heels and running into his house and into the living room where all the arguing was taking place.

"I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY IN YOUR MIND, YOU THOUGHT IT WAS OKAY TO SPOIL A FUCKING GENDER REVEAL BY POSTING IT ON INSTAGRAM AND ON TOP OF THAT SPOILING THE FACT THAT WE'RE HAVING FUCKING TWINS!!!" the voice of Lando booming louder as I inched closer to Carlos' living room.

"I DID IT BECAUSE YOU TOOK EVERYTHING FROM ME! YOU TOOK MY BABY, MY LIFE, MY GIRL, YOU TOOK IT ALL! I HAVE NOTHING TO LIVE FOR!" Logan shouted in rebuttal, his face contorted in a way I've never seen before and his skin as red as a tomato.

When our eyes locked, I could see Logan's eyes soften but when he opened his mouth to say something, Lando cut him off.

"I DIDN'T 'TAKE' YOUR GIRL, I SHOWED HER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO LIVE IN A HOUSE WHERE SHE DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT DOING SOMETHING WRONG WITH HER EVERY MOVE. I SHOWED HER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE IN A HAPPY AND HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP, I SHOWED HER WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE LOVED BY A REAL MAN! I SHOWED HER EVERYTHING YOU COULDN'T AND YOU KNOW WHY? BECAUSE YOU'RE A COWARD!" that seemed to set Logan off because the second the word "coward" came spilling out of Lando's mouth, Logan lunged towards him in an angry manner.

Before they could make any type of contact, Carlos was in the middle trying to set some type of boundaries between them.

"YOU GUYS ARE NOT FIGHTING IN MY HOUSE! LOGAN, OUT NOW! BEFORE I CALL THE COPS!" That seemed to be enough for Logan to walk away but not before stopping in front of me, his face so close to mine I could feel his breath against my skin.

"I hope I never see you again until your fucking funeral, slut." Logan walked away brushing his shoulder past mine as he did.

I knew Logan felt some type of way towards me since I left him while I was pregnant and refused to give in to all his promises of being a better man for me but hearing those words coming out of his mouth hurt. I always hoped we would be able to work it out for the sake of Yelena but after what he said, I don't know if we can, even if I wanted to.

Everything after what Logan said was blur, I don't remember him leaving, I don't remember Lando running after him and Carlos after Lando, but more importantly, I don't remember my legs giving out under my weight and me collapsing to the ground.

All at once everything started to hit me like a semi-truck. The pain in my knees after the fall, the ache in my heart but also the excruciating pain in my abdomen.

"BABE?! BABY ARE YOU OKAY? CARLOS GET THE CAR STARTED! WE HAVE TO TAKE Y/N TO THE HOSPITAL!"

-

The whole car ride to the hospital had to be the worst 15 minutes of my life. Every bump or sudden brake of the car increased the pain in my abdomen by 10. At one point it literally felt like there was an elephant sitting on me, restricting my oxygen intake.

When we finally arrived, Carlos quickly parked in front of the ER doors before rushing inside. Less than 30 seconds after running into the hospital, a group of doctors and nurses came running outside with a gurney.

Seeing them, Lando swung the car door open and quickly got out, allowing them better access to get to me.

Getting transferred from the back seat of the car to the gurney hurt just as suspected but they quickly rushed me in so they could evaluate my symptoms to tell me what's wrong.

No matter how much pain medication they gave me, the pain was still too much to bear.

"Do you want us to give you something to sedate you?" The student doctor said. She sounded genuinely hurt at hearing how much pain I was in.

"YES! PLEASE, I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE!" I screamed and I watched as she grabbed the vile of liquid.

Just as the student doctor was done giving me the sedative, I heard the doctor come in.

"So, unfortunately I've got some ba-AH NO! WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER?"

"I- Uh, Gave her a sedative?"

"YOU'RE NEVER SUPPOSED TO DO THAT WITHOUT CONSULTING ME! THE SEDATIVE IS GOING TO DO MORE HARM THAN GOOD!" that was all I heard before slipping into unconsciousness.

-

After I fell unconscious and was of no use, my doctor made his way to the waiting room to have a talk with Lando in order to figure out the steps going forward.

Once Lando locked eyes with the doctor, he shot up from his seat "Doc, how is she??" Lando asked as he searched the doctors face for answers.

"Unfortunately your girlfriend has a rare condition that affects the babies called Monochorionic Twins, which is where the babies share the same placenta and amniotic sac which can cause tangling of umbilical cords, imbalance of nutrients, blood and problems to other vital organs. Your girlfriend also has a history of major bleeding, vomiting and dehydration during pregnancy which also puts her at risk. We have to operate to save them, the babies have a 25% chance of survival and would have to be in the NICU for many months whereas your girlfriend has a 75% of surviving with minimal damage to any part of her reproductive system. " the doctor started, he tried to look and sound as sympathetic as possible.

"What are you saying Doc?" Lando asked, his breath and hands shaky and his knees trembled beneath him.

"You have to choose who we save, your babies or your girlfriend."

-

Again, thank you guys so much for the overwhelming amount of support I've received in the past few days. I appreciate and love each and every single one of you guys and I hope you enjoy this part.

Unfortunately this series is coming to an end soon but I really don't want to say goodbye to it yet.

taglist:

@luckyladycreator2 @itsmiamalfoy @jeffs77 @ilivbullyingjeongin @forevercaffeinated-lee @daemyratwst @gulphulp @callsignwidow @f1wintermoon13 @teenwolf01 @victoriassecret101 @hiireadstuff @formulaal @eddieharrington @kazza72584 @zabwlky1999 @dark-night-sky-99 @rougekiki @xoscar03 @jess-wither @bountychanti @dhanihamidi @Ggasly.p @tellybearryyyy @a-panseuxalmess @love-simon @tallrock35 @iiaik0ii @Milkyymelanine @ilovsyou3000morgan @styl1shl1v

[edelgards]

i had a train of thought about saint seiros and catholic canonization and ended up yapping about how rhea's sainthood isn't a symbol of her divinity but is an allegory of her humanity instead.

sainthood in the catholic church is the recognition of people who performed miracles, did acts of goodwill, etc. in the name of god. these individuals are then canonized by the church who acknowledge their good deeds and are now considered as holy people, the closest we—original sin bearers, according to them—get to divinity i guess and a lot of canonized saints were people who weren't the best nor the ones you'd expect to be saint.

in fe3h, of course we know the church was not exactly what we thought it was and such rules might or might not be in the seiros doctrines. seiros is a self declared saint lol yes, it was a ruse but it made me think and compare that situation to catholic canonizations.

rhea was born a divine being, a child of the goddess. she doesn't need to be elevated to sainthood, she IS divine. you don't need to sanctify what is pure from the very beginning. that's like calling an angel a saint or something and implying that a divine entity had been a sinner/impure and is only holy because of canonization which i think, from a religious fanatic pov, is an insult. anyways seiros, however, is called a saint... which i'd like to think implies the opposite of the catholic church's meaning of sainthood.

rhea/seiros' sainthood is a symbol of her humanity.

of her being flawed, her imperfections. everything that happened after zanado was her, a divine being, becoming human. her vengeance, righteous fury, her grief and most of all, her kindness despite all that's happened are what makes her human.

honestly don't know where i'm going with this but i guess you could look at the tragedy being her rebirth? from "holy" to human. her humanity began the second she lost her mother. it spiraled her grief and drove her to vengeance—her war with nemesis and his 10 elites. and then, there's her church. what started out as damage control and a self-preservation driven lie turned into something genuine that allowed her to learn to love the people that killed her own.

her continued service to the people (albeit morally questionable at times i have to admit) is, to me, her continued acceptance of her humanity–whether conscious, not, or figuratively. as opposed to indech and macuil yeeting out of human affairs the moment the war was over, a refusal of their "humanity" and choosing "divinity" instead.

ok, that's all. my point is rhea's humanity is what makes her holy. her ability to be kind after all that she went through is what makes her a saint and that makes me insane sometimes because can you imagine losing your people and you're the only one that knows, surrounded by the mirror image of the people that took your own?? anyways, talking to empty chairs: thanks for coming to my ted talk.

[yuseirra]

I really enjoy drawing them as gods! :) I'll keep drawing this version too while I can (and even after things clear up~)

I jotted about these guys earlier AGAIN and it's so funny, I'll put it in the read more

(was written in another language, translated in bulk by chatgpt~)

I set up my tablet to draw all weekend and started listening to Fatal again.

Seriously, this song… it’s just Kamiki, saying, “I can’t live without Ai~~ I want to see Ai so badly… Without her, I’m really going to die, I feel like I’ll die—what am I supposed to do?” That’s exactly what it sounds like.

It’s like Ai is Ame-no-Uzume, and Kamiki is her husband. He’s like a god who lost his wife and went completely insane. I can’t hear it any other way, seriously. If this isn’t the case, I’d be so disappointed! There’s just no other explanation for all the bizarre situations in the story. Every time I hear this song, I feel like I’m losing my mind because of this interpretation…

This isn’t Aqua. Right now, Aqua let go of his wish for Ai and is sinking deeper as he saves Ruby. No, it’s Kamiki who’s crying about not being able to live without Ai, wanting to see her that badly. What are we supposed to do with him? Why does he love Ai this much? (To be fair, the backstory is there. Watching his character unfold, I thought, "Yeah, it makes sense he’d fall for Ai.” Even before the song and Chapter 154 came out, I was certain of it.) He’s the only character who’d have such a “lack of Ai.” He lost Ai, and now he’s like, “My destiny is to get her back!” I’m sure that’s what’s driving him. He studied science in college, built a company, and went around doing all these things while telling himself, “It’s my fault, my fault,” and witnessing people dying. Seriously… what is this?

And his eyes—I feel they were originally golden, but it feels like something mixed in because of that black star, which changed the color. His eyes look so murky. I don’t think they were meant to be purple. Every other character has clear eyes, but whenever they show his in the anime, his color is cloudy, almost like something else is mixed in.

The Hoshino family’s eye colors connect to their names, but Kamiki’s name means “light,” so why the sudden purple? It could be, but his eyes look so cloudy, and no other character’s eyes have that quality. He’s not in his right mind… he really seems possessed. And why are the lyrics like this? Why do they have this meaning? If this isn’t revealed, I’m going to seek out the author myself. It’s almost funny. This song is just so strange.

It sounds like constant crying—a song of intense longing, he’s losing his mind. Once again, this isn’t Aqua’s emotional arc. Kamiki’s emotions are ten steps deeper than Aqua’s, maybe even more unhinged. He literally seems unable to live without Ai. But this makes sense if they’re a divine couple; they literally can’t function without each other. They need to be together, which even aligns with the things Kamiki says in the story. He was hers and she was his- What is he, really? He isn’t your average person. He’s genuinely strange. What he does is something that can't just be explained with charisma or “because he’s charming.” No, Ai and Kamiki must have originally been gods.

Honestly, Kamiki must be a god who was deeply devoted to his wife, driven to madness because people killed her. That’s why Aqua was assigned to dunk him into the sea to get him… This storyline would make so much more sense if this is it.

Ai must be crying in heaven if she sees what’s become of her husband. It’s so absurdly tragic. I feel like this direction would make more sense. I mean, what kind of story would it be if Kamiki were just “the bad guy”? We already know he was fundamentally a good person. How could an ordinary person even do all these things? I know the setting is modern, with cell phones, electronics, law enforcement, etc. But honestly, people buying into this guy’s ideals to this degree is baffling. He could only pull this off if he were a god.

Fatal… I’m sure I’ve shared my thoughts on this song countless times, but every time I listen to it, I feel like I’m one step closer to understanding its meaning. This song’s emotions are just so Kamiki. If this is Kamiki, though… well, he must really have loved Ai. He’s struggling so much, and you can really feel what it means to not be able to live without someone. He simply can't bear it. That’s how strong his love is.

At this point, can’t we just let him meet Ai again already? He fell apart because he couldn’t see her, even though he wanted to so badly. Was he really at fault for all of this? Is he actually responsible for Ai’s death? I don’t think so… If Ai had been there, he probably wouldn’t have ended up like this.

We need to find out the real reason Ai died, don’t we? This song has to mean something, right? There has to be a reason this song came out. I wouldn’t have started down this path if I didn’t feel I already knew the answer. If I were the author, I’d never make a character who wants to see Ai so desperately into her killer. Maybe Kamiki has some godly power that became unstable out of his anxiety, causing the chain of events that led to her death, but...

Now that we know Ai truly loved Kamiki, I can’t believe he’d even lay a finger on her. It just doesn’t fit his character or story. His behavior shows he isn’t capable of that. This is the same person who couldn’t even retaliate against people who treated him horribly, even those he cared less about than Ai. He was a kind person.

Looking at Kamiki’s consistent behavior, there’s always this gentleness, almost peacefulness. Even if he’s lost it now, that gentleness seems closer to his true nature. I feel like something forced its way into him and twisted him.

The person Ai loved was probably this part of Kamiki, the gentle exterior. If you look at it, it makes sense why she’d fall for him. He’s fundamentally that kind of person, but something happened to him.

I’m rarely wrong about things like this… There aren’t many chapters left now, so if I’m wrong, I’ll just take it as it comes.

Was Kamiki really the kind of person Aqua could treat that way? Honestly, I wasn’t satisfied watching the interactions between Tsukuyomi and Aqua. It didn’t feel good to watch them connect and talk sympathetically. Plus, if it turns out Ai loved someone who was truly insane, that’s another problem.

If Kamiki really did do horrible things, it would make more sense if they were god-level punishments from a god who went insane. If he were just a regular boy who lost it and became a serial killer… what even is that? That would be so disrespectful to people who have similar backgrounds. For a character like this, I feel like there should be a certain amount of care in how he’s handled. Otherwise, I'd really be upset. I’m sure the author understands that.

Anyway… it feels like the answer’s already in the song. Like the answer’s already been given. There aren’t many chapters left, so I guess we’ll find out soon.

[oh-no-its-bird]

For the Uchiha Houhua AU, how does he survive the massacre? I'm guessing either he uses his poison skills to fake his death or he does the 'actually I was a prodigy all along' thing in front of Itachi. Itachi spends the next several years being driven a little insane by finding this out about his old friend.

Also does Houhua incarnate as a baby? Because if so he was probably old enough to babysat by Obito. I feel like you could do something interesting with that.

On that note his relationship with kakashi. Like that's his little brother figures sensei, and he was a shizun in his last life, he knows what it is to be a good teacher and kakashi in the early series is not that. If he also knew Obito and knows that that's his eye in kakashi's head? Oof.

How much of the Uchiha eye thing does he get? Does he have his sharingan? Or the mangekyou?

Also, wasn't it cannon that part of the reason why danzo let Itachi let Sasuke live was because he was a moldable child? How does he feel about having a semi adult Uchiha still alive? I feel like Houhua is walking a constant tightrope of protecting himself and Sasuke and not being seen as a threat by the creepy old man.

THIS IS A WONDERFUL QUESTION!! I. Am not too sure, actually

I feel like it'd probably be him trying to fight back maybe? Faking his death absolutely sounds like the shit hed do tho, so hmm might put that in his back pocket too

Either way, Houhua vs Itachi 1v1 where they're surprisingly well matched sounds really fun I cant lie.

Mmmm, maybe he can 1v1 Itachi and hold up surprisingly well? Itachi is doing the what is this, how are you doing this, have you been hiding yourself from me this whole time?! routine as Houhua goes fuck shit oh my god oh my god I cant believe that worked oh fuck--

Then Obito fucking teleports behind Houhua and stabs him. Oopsies!

Houhua somehow survives due to genuine luck, and gets a hint about there having been more than 1 person at the massacre maybe?

Idk if thatd work tho. Mmmm so many thoughts.

I do think that no matter what, Houhua would have to be "defeated" in some way. Play dead for a bit. If he comes out of the fight having visibly won, it'll spell problems and set dominos in motion I dont want dominoing just yet

So no matter what, he's ending the fight face down on the floor

ALSO THATS. SUCH A GOOD POINT ACTUALLY SHIT, DID OBITO HELP BABYSIT HIM?? Houhua did reincarnate as a baby, tho I think there was some soft mental block on him becoming truly conscious till he was at least around 5 years old. So by the time he was conscious at least, Obito was already gone. Rip!

I think that Kakashi wouldnt be immune to looking at Houhua and seeing the reflection of another cry baby ninja, though Houhua wouldn't have any real memory of Obito (tho he might have heard ab him before, with some clan members comparing them quietly when they think he's not listening)

Anyways I need a scene where Houhua and Obito meet once Houhua is older and Houhua straight up says "You know, I never did get why people thought we were anything alike" as a clear insult

Rare Houhua w !!

I think Houhua has an unusually difficult time manifesting anything w his eyes just bc of the emotional walls he has up between him and everyone around him. He does not allow himself to feel deeply for anyone enough for his eyes to be affected, no matter how fond he may grow of them. There is always a wall between him and the world.

I do also however think that no matter how hard he tries to distance himself from the people around him, even having known for years now that they'd all die this way, seeing the people who he was raised around all die to the hands of a boy he might have grown fond of--

Yeah.

Not even he's immune to that.

So when the massacre happens, he'll at least get his sharingan, tho idk how man tomoe (and I cant really remember what is needed to gain each tomoe, so, oops)

I do think he'd have an incredibly difficult time manifesting his mangekyou, for all the reasons above, so if he ever does it'd be way down the line.

I also think it'd be super fucking interesting (especially from an outsiders perspective) if he manifested it somehow due to MBJ's involvement, since his reincarnation is wandering around here somewhere as Jun, and does not remember Houhua

Houhua has no explanation for why he cares about this man deeply enough to manifest the mangekyou. Sorry.

Also, Im ngl, as I write this I can totally see an argument for something along the lines of "well Houhua went through a fuck ton of trauma as SQH, so what if when he regains his memories around 5, he automatically unlocks his sharingan just through that remembered trauma? Then just keeps it secret for years until the massacre"

I think that could be interesting tbh, it would also tell a story all on its own ab his grief for his past life and all the people there. Smthn to think ab, idk

Houhua is a bit too old and way too clever for Danzo's liking. hHis one only saving grace is that, on the surface at least, he's a fuckin worm of a boy and has literally no achievements other than having survived Itachi

He isn't worth getting rid of yet, but Danzo has an eye on him, just waiting for a reason to potentially knock him off.

Good think Houhua decided not to go the child prodigy route!! Putting his own flaws and weaknesses on blast to all of Konoha probably saved his fucking ass with Danzo. At least for now, anyways.

[aihoshiino]

The babygirlification if Hikaru is crazy in this fandom... I can't believe that people seem to believe he did zero bad things when ch109 literally showed him standing over Yura and saying that she died so he could feel something...? Just because he's not the one who pushed her, doesn't mean he wasn't an accomplice! (I don't see how Nino would've known about the hiking trip without his help. Also don't see why he would be there monologuing unless he's also a hiking enthusiast who just happened to be there.) He could be both! He could be someone Ai loved but also be a person who became lost without her! Look at Aqua who literally went on a maniacal journey of revenge that saved literally no one & killed 2/3 people whom Ai loved. Because she's gone. The way I see Hikaru's character is that, he loved Ai and understood her as a person instead of the persona she presented. Yet her passing made that persona the only legacy she left behind (in his eyes). She was seen as "the idol closest to the Dome" even though she didn't care! That title wasn't given to any of the other Bkoma members, just her. And, he wasn't really allowed into their children's life because she said so. The only thing he's got left were the "lies" and despite knowing that killing people for her legacy is not what she would've wanted, she's not around to stop him anymore. I think he was a man driven to desperation and doing terrible things because his love was genuine yet no one taught him how to love properly. And her final "rejection" made him believe that being a terrible person was the only thing he could be. Which was why Ai's video became such a huge blow to him: he could've lived without her knowing that her as a person didn't let go of him, yet he went down this path thinking that the true her rejected him & the "lies" was the only thing he could take.

I don't think Ai's rejection broke Hikaru, per se. I think she made him believe that he was worthy of love and not broken (like he thought). And the way things unfold drove him into a spiral that was planted long ago. Humans don't need to be innocent to be worthy of love. The HKAI relationship was two traumatised children finding comfort in eachother. And Hikaru's crimes were about someone letting intrusive thoughts get to them. I don't like how Akasaka handled it at all, but I think erasing Hikaru's grief and the destruction it brought isn't a good way to read his character.

SO, for what it's worth, I do think the way you've analyzed Hikaru here is how he was intended to be read by Akasaka, at least by the end of the story, I don't blame anyone at all who went into this final stretch of OnK legit thinking we were going to get a reveal that Hikaru was not just a straight up villain or at least sympathizing with him and interpreting him as a slightly softer character, because the story basically spends the entirety of the Movie Arc beating you over the head with Extremely Sympathetic Hikaru Characterization.

Hell, it starts asking you to sympathize with him basically from the word go. The first concrete fact we learn about him outside of Aqua's insanely (understandably!) biased POV immediately throws every explicit and implicit assumption we have about him out the window. Not only does his age mean that he was one of Ai's peers and not, as Aqua seems to have been assuming, an older man who had victimized her but we learn this information in tandem with realizing - as Akane points out - this means Taiki was conceived when he was eleven years old, with all that implies. Akane's disgusted reaction pretty clearly telegraphs to the reader how we're supposed to take it and… idk, maybe this sounds cynical, but giving a character a backstory of CSA is like the Press To Make Audience Instantly Want To Protect This Character's Smile button. It very much primes you to want to feel bad for him.

109 does throw a spanner in these works and I do remember even at the time feeling very fucking uncertain about OnK potentially going for the grody old trope of "this character was a CSA victim and now they're Evil" (IF ONLY I FUCKING KNEW) but the more I re-read 109, I felt increasingly uncertain of what, exactly, we were supposed to take away from it. I actually had a suspicion for a really long time that 109 was so heavy handedly and overtly portraying him as a straightforward villain specifically to mislead the reader When They Cry-style and that he wasn't the one responsible for Yura's death at all.

Add all this to the fact that the Movie Arc centers Hikaru's victimhood and his extremely sad wet cat pathetic boy characterization literally at the expense of Ai's story in the movie that was supposed to be about her but what the fuck ever and it's really hard not to think that this is how the story wants you to feel about Hikaru. Hell, the Movie Arc even asks us to empathize with Airi, who is a fucking child rapist. I don't think it's unreasonable for anyone to assume that we were not supposed to think of Hikaru as a straightforward villain, especially when Ruby basically, like, looks into the camera when she's having her meeting with him and goes "nobody is born ontologically evil btw people get fucked up by their environments and blaming individuals for systemic issues isn't how anything gets fixed".

Also, like… I want to be delicate about this but I think it's also important to remember that Hikaru's motivations and supposed villainy as portrayed in OnK as of late are pretty outlandish and hard to connect with. But there are almost certainly people in OnK's audience who are also C/SA survivors who are able to resonate with a more grounded portrayal of him. I don't blame anyone at all for preferring a more sympathetic take on him in that case.

[gunnrblze]

Kick x Hesh

NSFW, 2000k+ words, pt. 2 here

A lazy little thing for these two, idk what it really is lol but I love shipping them. Very teasing, very sappy sweet (it was actually supposed to be horny shit but I lost the plot like three times. will probably write something else actually smutty for them)

CW: no actual sex but mention of dick and what not, 18+ MDNI

Kick couldn’t quite explain it, but there was something intriguing about one of the newest young additions to the task force.

Hesh was a smart kid in his eyes. A damn good soldier, trained well and bred with enough ambition and determination for a lifetime. Not a kid, actually. A man. One he found himself lingering on for too long sometimes, amber eyes tracing the outline of Hesh’s biceps all the way down to the belt constricted around his waist. One whose voice made his stomach twist when it rang in over comms. One who had started to drive him up the wall.

It was that little grin that usually did him in. When the man would dote on Riley or joke with Logan, his mouth would curve up, and it made Kick’s heart stutter behind his ribs. He’d willfully ignored it for a while, until Hesh began talking to him more. Asking more questions, unnecessary ones, really. Kick didn’t mind, he could chat if the time called for it. But he couldn’t focus with Hesh standing over him at his desk. He had to will himself to look in those pretty green eyes instead of at the pretty mouth yapping over god knows what.

The worst part though, above all he reckoned, was the dreams he’d started to have about the man. Dreams of lips glued to one another, hands up shirts and mouths going down in directions they shouldn’t.

Maybe it was his fault. Maybe he stared at the sway in Hesh’s hips for too long sometimes. Maybe he shouldn’t admire the way his tac pants wrapped taut over those thick thighs, corded with muscle and littered with enough dark hair to make anyone salivate a little. Maybe, maybe, maybe.

Or maybe Hesh just had a charm that could drag down even the strongest of men.

——————

“Hey man, have you seen Merrick? Got paperwork to do” Hesh would linger in the doorway of Kicks office. He didn’t even need to turn around to know it was the younger man before he spoke, and frankly he didn’t want to. Didn’t want to fuck up his focus, is what he decided on.

“Nah, probably lurking around here somewhere though” the amber eyed man shrugged, clicking at some bullshit on his desktop while his fingers curled around the mouse a little tighter than necessary. He’d curse himself for being so goddamn affected by the kid one day, all it took was that smooth, honeyed voice and he was no better than a sailor being dragged down by a siren at sea.

He could hear Hesh walk up behind him, no doubt eyeing said bullshit on his screen. Kick could smell him too and god, he thought he’d have to force the poor soldier out of his office before he did anything regrettable.

“Watcha working on?” Hesh asked with more intrigue in his voice than he knew the boy really had. He’d been doing that lately. Along with the questions of genuine curiosity he’d throw at him, Hesh would do exactly what he was doing now. Linger. Kick felt both lucky and psychotic about it.

“Workin on work, kid” Kick would reply easily, his free hand biting the nail off his thumb, a habit he couldn’t recall when he’d picked up as of late.

He could feel those mossy eyes on him as Hesh stood behind his desk chair, observing too intently at the way Kicks mouth moved over his thumb. He distantly wondered if the nearest insane asylum had any beds available, because he was certain he was being driven to madness.

“Ya know, Logan told me how gross it is to bite your nails, lots of bacteria-“ Hesh would start to ramble, and Kick wasn’t sure why he was still here, but he couldn’t complain. He’d never complain. It was just difficult to focus with a six foot one, brick wall standing behind you, the dizzying scent of his musk and something faintly pine scented filling his nostrils.

Kick let him rant, and he nodded, chuckling at Hesh’s insistence that he stop the habit before it gets worse. That he should find something else to chew on.

Goddamn himself for taking the whoreish route everytime, but his mind filled with so many other options of items he could sink his teeth into. Things he’d chew and bite and lick at until they were raw-

“Just saying, kinda gross if you really think about it” the soldier would cap his rant off with, reaching a hand around Kicks shoulder to knock his fingers away from his mouth. A grin would form on both of their faces, making the amber eyed man turn to look up at his office intruder, ignoring the way his heart flitted too hard at the contact.

“Don’t ya got something better to do than insist what goes in my mouth and what doesn’t?” He’d ask Hesh, and honest to goodness, he wasn’t sure if he could take the sight before him when he actually did turn around.

Wide grin on the man’s face as he chuckled deeply, the type that made his stomach lurch and his dick twitch a little. Staring down at him with those deep eyes and a comeback settling on the of tip of his tongue.

“Trust me, what goes in and out of your mouth is your business, not mine” Hesh would retort, making Kick smirk deeper than necessary as his mind filled in so many blanks. He debated for only a moment about whether or not he should voice those fill ins.

“Yeah? You seem to care quite a bit about my mouth” he’d settle for something cheeky enough as he swiveled around in the desk chair, thick arms crossing over one another as he faces the soldier now.

It made Hesh blink plainly for a second, a gear visibly turning in his head as the grin faltered for a moment. Kick worried for a second, if he should shut the fuck up and never speak again, but the blush that started to bloom on the man’s cheeks in front of him had his own mind stuttering.

“So what? Nail biting is a bad habit” Hesh recovered quickly, giving a perfectly pretend nonchalant shrug. Kicks brain geared into autopilot, unable to talk himself through whether or not he should bite his tongue now.

“Not biting them anymore…still concerned with the state of my mouth though, aren’t ya?” A little grin found its way on his lips, looking up at the man to admire the way the worsening pink of his cheeks contrasted against the green of his irises. The momentary widening of those eyes was just the cherry on top for him.

“No, just…just saying” Hesh would shake his head, and Kick could see the way his fingers dug into his thick biceps, curling around the firm muscle.

“Yeah? That why you’re still in my office instead of Merricks?” Kick would add swiftly, wondering how far he could take it. How far Hesh’s leash would run before he let himself detach from it, and hit Kick with the comebacks he knew the soldier wanted to give him.

The amber eyed man wasn’t stupid, he knew this wasn’t an equal playing field. That Hesh was younger, less experienced. Too dignified to let himself flirt with an older team member, one that outranked him regardless of actual rank. But Kick knew he wanted too. Wanted to test the waters with him because why the hell else would he still be here? Why would he linger so much? Why would he drive Kick crazy and then let him flounder? Why, why, why, would he let himself get worked up over the resident computer nerd of the bunch?

“Yeah” Hesh nodded, not very subtly biting the inside of his bottom lip as he gazed down at Kick, whose turn it was to be at a loss for words now. His eyes flicked to the open door of his office, and back up to Hesh, eyeing him down and ignoring the way his throat felt a little tighter all a sudden.

Hesh stepped a little closer to him, eyeing the man himself. The way Kicks thighs were spread in his desk chair, tactical shirt tight over his upper arms and shoulders, the delicious week old stubble on his jaw.

“What if…I did care?” He’d ask the operator below him with enough confidence to surprise them both, fingers in a vice grip around his own arms, crossed taut over his chest. Kick merely stared up at him, a smirk forming on his pretty mouth.

“What if you did, hm? Would that be so bad, kid?” Kick would ask, head tilting slightly as he felt his brain start to turn to molten lava at just the simple sight of Hesh biting his lip now.

“Would it?” The younger man asked a bit more seriously, voice deepening. Confirming all of Kicks suspicions. He didn’t want to get in trouble for this.

“No…” Kick answered easily, shaking his head softly. All he wanted was to reassure him, to run his fingers over his buzzed hair and kiss those pretty lips red until every worry drained from Hesh’s head.

“…wouldn’t be a bad thing at all” he was becoming less and less concerned with the state of his office door being open, trusting that he could rely on the sound of any footsteps down the hall to make him act more professionally than he was about to.

Kick stood up, stepping too close for comfort toward the soldier in front of him. His hand extended, cupping Hesh’s cheek with more tenderness than he usually exerted. He could feel the man’s jaw clench and unclench under his roughened fingers, and it made him smile. A smile that Hesh couldn’t help but return.

It was far more warm and inviting than Kick ever thought the world would allow him. Especially with someone who deserved that whole world in its entirety. Someone who deserved a world sweeter than the one he was given.

It became a blur as Kicks other hand cupped Hesh’s face, leaning in only halfway before the green eyed man reciprocated, lips pressing firmly enough to make both men weak in the knees.

Hesh was backed up into the wall behind him, boots squeaking against the linoleum flooring, his own hands flying to Kicks shoulders for support as their mouths fought for first place. One of Kicks hands slid down the man’s cheek to the back of his neck, grasp firm enough to belay his own need, the all consuming heat that was spreading throughout his body.

Sighs turned into groans, hips pressed flush against one another as both men fought to control themselves, all too aware of the open door, and the fact that they’re both very much on duty.

“God, this is even better than I thought it’d be” Kick rasped against the other man’s mouth, willing his dick not to harden up just yet. He could feel Hesh smirk against his lips, the soldiers hands leaving his shoulders to grip his hips with enough firmness to make Kicks knees even weaker, damn near threatening to give out on him.

Somehow Kick could hear footsteps coming down the hallway over the pounding of his heartbeat and the melting of his brain. He regrettably pulled himself off Hesh, catching a bit of oxygen as his eyes roamed over the man’s swollen red lips. A sight he wanted to sear into his brain.

The footsteps drew closer and Kick backed away from the wall, walking toward his office door to shut it before catching sight of Merrick ready to peer into the room.

Merrick immediately noticed Kicks equally disheveled state, but thankfully chose to ignore it, instead, asking if he knew where the lieutenant was. A moment of silent understanding passed between them, before he mentioned a little too loudly to tell Hesh his ass is due in his office if Kick just so happens to see him. Followed by what looked like an eye roll.

Both men fought not to laugh after Kick shut the door and put his lips right back where they belonged.

[x-birdsong-x]

Curious what you have to say about Adams

Edit: speed-rewrote/rearranged this at 10pm in a burst of anxiety-driven rambling because my coursework started up again. posted it as is because i probably need to take a break and it's been in my drafts for a few weeks. there's not really an ending here this is one big post with me rambling about my underdeveloped blorbo

I've rambled at my buddy @/willowpelt about Adams for weeks now n I think any of my House moots know how very autistic I am about her,,,,

Adams is stubborn. And petty. And sheltered. She's short-tempered and avoidant and nowhere near as trusting as she likes to think/say she is. She does not make it easy to get along with her.

Her moods are about as reactive as early-season Chase, the closest any later character ever gets to being similar to that; the smallest thing can set her off and she's snapping at everyone like a cornered cat for the rest of the day (god knows what made her angry in the first place half the time). She can get physically destructive when she's angry enough and refuses to get physically destructive when she's angry enough until her upgraded dad tells her to and gets her a rage room to destroy with a baseball bat. Her reaction to House asking if she's still angry before that is to shut up and stare at him. She swings between Fight and Freeze depending on the situation. The one time she reads House even mostly correctly is when she tells him he took the first deal anyone offered him Because He Wanted To Punish Himself. The only time she even near-successfully lies to House (or Chase) is when she is lying about her family, and Adams is Not A Good Liar. She can not lie to House or Chase or even Foreman to save her life.

She's completely Insane in ep 1 and is drastically toned down after that for literally no reason -- She gets attached to House before he gets attached to her and within two minutes of him calling her a dumbass she decides he's her Free Dad Upgrade and she'll never listen to anyone else ever again. She spends a good few seconds just pouting at him and then sulks for a good few hours when she finds out he briefly (indirectly) lied and then drops it completely when she's done. She gives him Vicodin when she's already on incredibly thin ice with her actual boss- and she doesn't like being in trouble here. She gets herself fired doing House's test and still finds a way to get a note smuggled into solitary just to tell him he was right. She's happy to meet up (for what she thought wasn't even work) with him when he first contacts her before ep 3 and sticks around from there.

Ep 5 is where she and Park are dramatically watered down even further just so Chase and Taub can play House-translators in a way that wasn't at all necessary given the way it's done covers misunderstanding House in ways Park and Adams literally never did.

And then there's ep 6. I project on Adams like a little whiteboard. I get mad when I think about her parents. Icicles by the scary jokes most Adams song of all time

This

Was Not

Her Fault

"You took the first deal they offered you because you wanted to punish yourself" is the only time she accurately reads House, the only time she almost manages to lie to any of them is when she's lying about her family. House spends their interactions this episode poking his second-to-newest daughter with a stick, as he does, and it gets little to nothing out of her except that her parents totally didn't do anything

When she does give him an answer, she starts it, and only when she has the opening to tell him He's Wrong, it was All Her Fault.

Honestly Adams would need years of therapy even if she hadn't had another episode after this (And Parents wasn't even her assigned episode, it was mostly Taub's)

The way Adams carries this around is genuinely so fucked up. Your sixteen-year-old with anger issues did a majorly impulsive thing. Something snapped and she went missing for two months and got into a very confusing very Not Good situation. She's not the type of person to have told them where she was- or at least where she stayed- while she was gone but I literally don't care if she didn't tell her parents that part of it I literally don't care if she got home and said she just stayed with a friend you can not tell your kid that She Did A Bad Thing that It Was All Her Fault that You Can't Believe She Did That that She Was Always The Problem There that She Caused All That Trouble to the point she believes it so strongly to the point she carries so much guilt so much desperation for absolution that when a kid who did the same thing who is the same age she was shows up she spends every second of it making everything worse by going This Is How It Has To Be This Is What You Need To Do Next

Runaways my beloved mess.

Why is this character-driven episode stuffed full of everything they needed to get into the season before Nobody's Fault/Chase covered months in-universe? Why are we following House running around without his ankle monitor all on-screen? Why is he taking the whole team with him to all these places? Why is Wilson here to say House is protecting Callie because he feels a connection with her but House never interacts with Callie at all past the opening? Why wasn't Foreman's relationship with Anita put in the episode before this - where it would've fit infinitely better because a point there was the patient's wife having feelings for her friend? Also I swear to god that reveal of Foreman going to that boxing match with House at the end of Parents did more for Foreman and House's relationship than any of this here.

Why is Chase so out of character and/or non-existent?

In context this one was Callie lying to keep covering up what her mom was really like, but this still feels ooc for Chase to me. Once they know about it, Callie's home life before she left is more fitting to Chase's situation with his mom and his sister than any other patient Chase has ever been matched up with and the one line he directly gets about Callie at all implies he doesn't believe her?

The most in-character thing Chase does in one of his so few significant appearances in this ep is be brutal when Adams tries (again) to go to him for reassurance/advice.

Chase doesn't ever hold back with her and I find it funny

The way Adams was handled here could have really worked if the episode had focused on what it was meant to focus on - if this one episode hadn't been used to scramble to tie up these other things pre-Nobody's Fault - if this other stuff wasn't taking up So Much Time in Someone Else's Assigned Episode.

I rewrite Runaways for fun- one version generally and one Much more self-indulgent version for the Warrior Cats AU because taking how Adams is handled in Parents - even moreso if they'd let her stay Crazy like she was in ep 1 - it could have worked as well to have had her be the one causing trouble through basically acting the way House does in the canon version of the ep, motivated by keeping Callie away from her mother, rather than causing trouble by doing what is, for Callie, the opposite of what she needs/wants.

Callie is given such a hard time here and Adams actually leads to multiple of those hard times but Callie still talks to her about Everything. Callie latches on to Adams as her safe person and looks for her opinion specifically when it only gets her nowhere and gives detailed versions of why she left/how she feels about her mother to Adams alone. They're so firewatcher's daughter to me,, nothing scares me more than the stranger at my door who I fail to give shelter time and worth

These two were the perfect matchup,, House read Callie like a book within minutes of first meeting her. He had this exact theory about her before he said it out loud. She's avoidant and stubborn and initially doesn't trust any of them. She swings between Fight and Say Nothing.

Callie at sixteen reached a breaking point with her family and ran away, got into (for her personally) a better situation, and then runs away again to get out of the hospital when the chance of being sent back home comes with it.

House read Adams like a book within the first day of knowing her (given he mentions noticing her getting bored in the three months she's been there - he'd done so much earlier than that without even talking to her). She's avoidant and stubborn and a whole lot less trusting than she thinks she is. She's Fight or Shut Up.

Adams at sixteen reached a breaking point with her family and ran away, got into an even worse situation, and then ran away from that to get out of it when going back home became the clear better(safer) option (and that really fucks with your mind when all you're told is that you did something wrong in the first place)

Adams blames herself for everything that went on when she was sixteen. She doesn't look back on any of it and see a reason for her leaving that she doesn't see as play stupid games win stupid prizes. But Callie's not doing that - She's found more stability away from home than she had at home, she's going to school, she still sees her friends, she's living on her own and knows what she's doing and where she wants to go even with the pushed-down emotions toward such a severed attachment to her mom.

Lightly counting the tiny retelling she starts here is watered down with the brightness turned up (succeeded by her being surprised that Callie still goes to school):

The way Adams responds to Callie is so much of her echoing. She spends this whole episode projecting right down to you think her mother wants to feel responsible for her daughter's problems?

It's you could at least let her in the room it's she's your mom and she's finally acting like it it's your mom knows she messed up and she's determined not to do it again and beyond the existing conflict Callie is upset that her parent is not listening to her(me too girl)

Adams' parents did something to make her snap before she ran away

And that Rebellious Phase is something Adams never really lost?? She's completely insane in ep 1. She and Park do a test House didn't want, she tries (and fails) at lying to Foreman for cover for House, she destroys a whole room with a baseball bat with only House telling her she's allowed to in ep 4. In Nobody's Fault she and Chase do a test House didn't want. Ep 18 she gives the kid a treatment House didn't want. She's yes a bit of a pain in Chase. She's stubborn as all hell in (parts of) Post Mortem and Runaways itself. Ep 8 and others she's just,, in One Of Her Moods.

Callie's actually fitting in some way for each of the team. Adams - ^^^ I'm autistic about them / Chase - caring for addict mom while just being a child himself. Dad unavailable in some way. Runaways is Adams' episode, but hell if Chase isn't actually involved in my rewrites / House - mentioned in the episode by Wilson / Taub - still adjusting to being a dad, struggling to feel an attachment to his kids and Callie is mentioned to have been closer to her dad than her mom / Park - Devotion to family / It's mad how Callie is (at least one of) the most developed patient(s) in the season even when the episode spends so much time on irrelevant stuff.

And with that - and again the way Adams is handled in Parents - The way Adams was handled here actually could've fit better for Park given that devotion to family and how they responded to the patient having left his family in ep 3:

vs.

I dunno. Have Adams cause trouble by pushing back at everyone who mentions getting Callie's mom involved.

That said I actually love Adams' last scene in Runaways I'm a complete sucker for the tone of these scenes (Parents, Runaways). Callie's parallels with Adams continue. House again tells Adams she's super fucked up. House tells Adams he doesn't care if she's fucked up. Adams has another crushing sense of unfinished business relating to that part of her life.

I'm obsessed with her. She's soaking up all my trauma like a sponge. I don't even remember when I first got so attached. She should be allowed to hit her dad with a baseball bat.

Adams also tells Chase she's seeing a trauma counselor post-Nobody's Fault and in the words of Willowpelt: "her therapist has it cut out for them and Adams doesn't even know it"

[justali-anne]

Thought Week: Flowey

Flowey is apparently the most popular character right now! And while that is really intriguing, I'm not surprised! He's one of the most complex and most tragic characters in the entire game. So, here are my thoughts about him.

(BTW, if you want to share your thoughts on Flowey, please reblog and share them! I love it when people come together to talk about a certain character, it brings a sense of community and I REALLY want to be a part of that. So please, reblog!)

(Also, the subheadings are gonna be colour-coded based on the character. I love colour-coded characters with a passion.)

First Impressions

I first encountered Flowey during my MLP phase when I was 11. I was watching a Fluttershy Plays Undertale Let's Play, and to be honest, I didn't think much of Flowey at first. To me, he was just the meanie that tricked Fluttershy into running into his friendliness pellets. I was more focused on Fluttershy, to be honest.

However, that is my earliest memory of Undertale. My first exposure to Undertale, funnily, wasn't Sans. It was Flowey. Well, Fluttershy, but Flowey was the first Undertale character I ever saw. Toriel was the second.

And I only just saw Flowey as a cheeky flower with a thirst for blood. I didn't look into him as anything more than that. Not until I got into Undertale as a 16 year old, anyway.

When I actually did get into the Undertale fandom and learned about his backstory, I thought, "Oh. That's a cool character. A sad one, but cool nonetheless." He was interesting, but not my favourite. I liked his sassiness and his tragic side and his creativity, but other than that, there just wasn't a lot I could say about him.

My Thoughts Now

Frick, I love this guy! Not as much as the Skelebros, but he's by far one of the most interesting characters in the whole game! While there wasn't a lot I could say about him in the past, there's definitely a lot I can say about him now!

By the way, I'm going to talk about Asriel here too, since I consider them to be the same person. Well... They are, but I think people tend to forget that.

One of my favourite things about Flowey (and Asriel) is that he's actually a genuinely creative person! He's creative in such a childlike manner, and I find that so very charming. Some of his incredible creations include things like...

Photoshop Flowey!

And the God of Hyperdeath!

Just look at this kid go!!!!! He is clearly a creative genius!!!!

No, but seriously, he gives heavy edgy 12-year-old vibes, and that just works so well, Toby Fox is so good at writing complex characters, it's just... AJEJHFHSJSJG. ...!?:.

It really hammers home that Flowey is a CHILD. He is a child who never got to grow up, who went through something insanely traumatic, who misses his best friend, whose loneliness has driven him to commit terrible acts just to FEEL SOMETHING. I used to see Flowey as a sadistic villain! But now it's just... sad. Sad and nuanced.

Even Flowey isn't all evil. Heck, I have a hard time even seeing him as evil anymore. He's definitely a bad guy, but he's just so... tragic.

Honestly, I think people often forget about Flowey's ability to be GOOD despite his lack of compassion. He is capable of making good choices! Mostly during the True Mercy ending, but even without a SOUL, Flowey is still capable of being nice. And that is another thing I like about him, and something I feel like should be discussed more often.

This is only one example.

Flowey and Asriel

There's a lot more I can say about him, but these are the first things that pop into mind when I think of him. He's such a sad character, it's not even funny. Personally, when I write him, I like to write him as very nuanced. His psychology is what I'm most interested in. The same can be said for a lot of characters, though.

To me, Flowey and Asriel are two sides of the same coin. Simultaneously, I see them as the same person. They represent periods in his life. Asriel for the simpler, happier times, before everything went to shit (excuse my language), and Flowey as the traumatised result of that shit.

And no matter what he does...

He can never get those simpler times back. And that's why Asriel can't stay...

People always talk about Asriel as this sweet-hearted, innocent crybaby, but I think that Flowey gives hints as to what he was really like in life. He was someone who would do anything to make his best friend happy, who liked to engage in mischief, who was a sore loser. And yes, I still think he was a kind-hearted soul... When he had a soul. I still think Flowey has some shades of kindness in there. Some emotions too.

Flowey ISN'T emotionless. I think we know that already, though. Throughout the game, Flowey displayed emotions like frustration, fear, excitement, sadness and grief. He GRIEVED for the loss of his compassion. For the loss of his best friend. But eventually, he just became numb to it, especially after he got the RESET ability.

Oh...

The Narrative

Flowey is up there as one of the most important characters in the entirety of Undertale. That is just a fact.

Story-wise, his death, as well as Chara's, set in motion the series of events that led to what the Underground is like by the time Frisk falls down. It created a whole domino effect! If it weren't for Asriel's death, Asgore would have never made that policy, Toriel would have never retreated to the Ruins, Alphys wouldn't have done those experiments, Sans wouldn't have found an anomaly in the timeline, and so on.

In a meta sense, Flowey is also the most important character, especially when it comes to resets and time loops. Imagine having the power to do whatever you want and take away the consequences. It sounds exciting, but eventually, you just grow numb to it all. Perhaps you'd want to try something different. Something more... extreme. He reflects the player in such a terrifying way, although I can argue that he had more freedom than Frisk because Frisk is literally being controlled by us, and in terms of exploration, we don't really stray off the path that much. But Flowey could go anywhere, do anything, and that's what makes him more scary.

Also, I've just had a thought. In typical RPG games, you come across enemies and bosses that you have to defeat (usually by killing or dismantling), and if you fail to do that, you die. "Kill or be killed".

And that's why Flowey's so important. If it weren't for Flowey, we wouldn't have Undertale the way it is. He's more than just the main villain, he's a representation of a player who's been playing the same game for far, far too long.

Conclusion

I like Flowey! He's not my favourite, but I can see why he would be to a lot of people. His tragedy, his creativity, and his role in the narrative are the three things that stick out to me about him the most.

But most of all... I love that he's essentially a bratty, traumatised kid.

I haven't covered every single aspect about Flowey, but this is just thoughts about him, this isn't an analysis or anything.

If you want to add your thoughts about Flowey, please please please please PLEASE add them in the notes! I wanna see people come together to talk about a character, it would be so cool!

See you tomorrow with Papyrus!

[plantsandpies]

Fairy tail headcanon not related to my previous post!

All dragonslayers have dyslexia. The first gen do because they were from 400 years ago. They spoke and read a different language. So I imagine it’s like them knowing Gaelic and then them having to learn English immediately because they were shoved 400 years into the future. And English has the highest rates of dyslexia because it’s combined with so many different languages and spellings. Obviously English isn’t what they speak, but I imagine it’s like this scenario.

The second gen do because the lacrema (I have no idea how to spell that) is based off of the previous dragonslayers. They wanted it to be like a skill transfer, so they just shoved the language thing in it. These people didn’t care about the people, just the result (look at cobra. He can listen to people’s thoughts. That would so over stimulating. They obviously didn’t think anything through).

I don’t know if Laxus got an actual procedure like the rest did, but if he didn’t it’s worse for him because his dad would’ve done it and he did it kinda incorrectly, as in, it works properly but it was placed incorrectly so some side effects are worse.

Which makes so much sense on why Natsu had trouble reading. Not only did he not know the language it’s also with different sounds, shapes, and spellings.

I imagine Gajeel joined young, but, unlike Fairytail, it wasn’t a place where you could admit you couldn’t read. Juvia was the one who taught him because even though she was a part of phantom she’s like a genuine and kind person. Until he learned she also read the jobs out loud but in a way where everyone just thought it was her being quirky. Gajeel didn’t pick up on until he went through his character arc. After he thanked her a lot and helped her make her grey body pillow.

(Unrelated, but I think Gajeel’s like, an engineering genius. He works with metal a lot and I think he’ll just make stuff. So he made the printing press for the fabric of the pillow).

As for if the gen one’s were too young to have learned the language. I believe Natsu and Gajeel were like eight. Because Natsu is 18 at the start of the show and Lucy’s 17, so he’s a year older. Meaning when he came out of the portal he had to be a year older than Lucy was. Her mom died when she was seven, so Natsu would be eight. I think Gajeel’s the same age. That would make the rest like 2 since Wendy’s 12 when Natsu is 18, but they still grew up around the language (which I’m calling demonic because they found it used in Zeref’s writings and in one of his demon books that was later stolen from the castle. That wasn’t its original name but it’s been 400 years and his works are like their only sources.) and most 2 year olds start learning to recognize letters. At least I did but my mom did make me watch like two episodes of educational tv (word world for anyone who’s wondering, which I hated because it was boring) before I could watch something not educational, so maybe I’m the weird one.

I also believe this was what Zeref wrote in even during the show because it was his native language and he was planning to die or change the past, so why would he need a new language? Plus it’s be super hard to learn especially when you’re literally being driven insane and time and culture is constantly changing. (I have my own theory about how the curse works because it’s kinda explained but also kinda not explained in the show; but that’s a different post.)

For reference: I have dyslexia and for me it’s spelling issues and when I read I like skip lines and sometimes the words like blur? If that makes sense. My sister also has it and had a lot of trouble with d and b growing up. She has it worse than me, though.

[riverofrainbows]

Ok so the black book episode.

I finally watched it.

It could have done with a double feature. There was so much going on. And it worked, emotionally, but it was a lot. The plot was so fucking condensed.

Fuck when they do something they do it right, don't they. The deaths of the three were fucking harrowing. No fanfare or dramatics, just realistic and dead.

I'm so goddamn impressed by Sophie playing 12 different people. I love her. I know she gets a lot of recognition, but she deserves some more. Holy shit her voice training skills must be off the rocks.

I thought they would have hired Quinn for the police officer, he looked kind of similar, and then i thought it was him and Tara. But with Sophie being on phone theatre, of course Nate was free.

I wonder how fast Sterling figured it out. I think about half a minute into the room with Nate. The rest was just playing along, and hesitating whether to actually go through with the con, while setting up an outcome for both decisions. Usually i really don't think he has it all immediately figured out, but usually he isn't at quite that high alert, and the target isn't that clear and big a deal.

It really should have been a double feature, or a movie length episode. There needed to be more time, to really lay it all out.

I like what they used as the contents and method of collection for the black book. I watched another show (can't remember which) where it was some unsourced collection of various evil people, and that was soo shady and frustrating.

I've come across a bunch of Sterling/Nate shipping by now, and I'm starting to agree. Like that is genuinely a love story for the ages. However i am firmly convinced that it is entirely mental and intellectual. I just really can't see them having any relationship type. Not that Sterling wouldn't fuck Nate but that's just Mark Sheppard's insane gay flirting aura. But mentally, those two are having mind sex, and are tragic soulmate lovers. Also because they have divorced vibes. I'm convinced of the headcanon that they were in a couple friendship driven/held up by their wives socialising, and played 6d time travel chess mind games over barbecue (aka having a mind sex love affair right in front of the salad) (but really low key because they wouldn't actually cheat on their wives).

The way the con failed and they died was really realistic and well done and really stressed me out :(((( not over that.

Also the way this confirmed the Hardison-Eliot ship (platonic or romantic) was. Very much canon thank you. Not to mention the "till my dying day". Like hello??? Also the ice cave and rundown job train scene having already confirmed the depth of Eliot-Parker's bond earlier in the season. (But toxic masculinity and being a show from 2009 impeding the Hardison-Eliot part till the last episode/them dying (rituals to touch other mens skin etc etc flashbacks to superhell love confession sth sth bury your gays (except they lived bitch)).

Also the setup with "do you think you could live a normal life" earlier in the season. Also², annotation to that one: Eliot talking about having to help Hardison's restaurant, as if Hardison didn't buy it for him.

I liked the part about order vs justice. Very 'keeping the peace with an abusive person causing more harm than upsetting status quo'.

It's a good ending for a show. Seriously, it's both end of an era and not destroying everything that was before. Still glad we got leverage redemption tho obviously.

Parker being the new mastermind is great

Her monologue ajsbsjjd. I was cackling so bad. It was a fantastic way to really cinematographically tie up the show though, and she is great for the job. Both Hardison (who already has enough to do) and Eliot (who really doesn't like leading) always get way too deep into stuff, including their respective jobs for it, which is one reason why they're so good though don't get me wrong.

Why did she have slicked back hair with no bangs, and weird eyeshadow :( Awful 1/10. One point for her clearly thinking she needs to put on hair gel for stepping into a Nate role for a con, like that is exactly a logic she would have.

Eliot's blue tinted glasses, love it.

I like that they're not having one of the guys do it just for misogyny reasons, and that at the same time her doing it is very well supported and set up by their characterisations, and not as some sort of disrespectful shoehorned girlboss feminism move. Which ends up with a woman being the new mastermind being actually well done too. Because they never do annoying stereotypes at leverage, and thank fuck for that.

I love that Sterling was there for the last episode. Also, i swear, getting used by Nate for a con (while getting something out of it himself) is a kink thing for him. It happens genuinely almost every goddamn time we see him, while he knows and actively plays along.

I want to see more of Sophies telephone theatre :(

How the fuck did they fake the car accident, they should have shown sth on it.

Only because i knew very securely that they were fine did i not get completely freaked out at Hardison lying there on the ground. And i never ever want to see Eliot gargle up blood ever again. :((((

I was 100% convinced that Parker can hold him with just one hand, i was so shocked. Honestly one of the first clues from the story itself that it was fake. Yes i have that much trust in her. Second clue was the balloon.

No actually, first clue was Nate looking at the cameras. Can't remember which first clue came first in the episode.

I thought Nate gave Sterling something when he distracted him from the trio, and clearly Sterling also thought so, he probably took like several seconds to check if he had gotten anything slipped into his pockets afterwards.

I wish we could have seen more of the "you lied to us?" conversation at the end. Not that that wasn't the tldr of it or needed change, but i want to see the whole conversation.

The tunnels were great. I again wish to have gotten even a crumb more information on that.

It might have done well, and I'm just throwing out ideas here, to be a two parter episode, they could have really used some extra space. The plot was really condensed.

It was q good episode, and a very good ending, something oh so rare in tv shows.

[mayabruhbruh]

do you think Mike’s behavior towards Will in S2 would somehow parallel his behavior towards El in S3?

Interesting ask! I like that comparison, though they are starkly different in nature. LETS THINK!!

So what you mean to point out is the glaring shift in attention from Will to El between seasons. I might've talked about this in an earlier post, but I love talking about it anyway, so let's dive in lmao.

So, I feel like it's pretty fair to say Mike is quite the easily-attatched, obsessive kind of person. And not in an insane way, at least not all the time, but you can see it in every season and in the way he sets his priorities. I mean, every season he finds something to latch onto and makes it his entire personality till something new comes along. And that's sort of what happened between seasons 2 and 3.

In season 2, Mike's sole purpose was to be by Will's side and to help figure out what was going on with him and the mind flayer. He was the one that was the most involved with his possession other than Joyce, and since he's just naturally such a leader and a genuinely objective-driven person, it was the only thing he focused on or worried about at all frankly all season.

Mike's determination to find Will in season one was his initial fixation, and I don't mean to use the term fixation to lessen the meaning of how much he invested himself in it. It's mainly a better way to express just how hyperfocused he gets in things like that. Mike nearly killed himself in season 1 for the slight chance that they might find Will again. WTF!? Anyway, season two was no different. With Will, his determination and general need to be of help is so prominent and almost default to him. It's really revealing of his priorities, the mere fact that he didn't go anywhere else for a solid few days while he watched over Will and wracked his brain for anything that could help fix the situation.

And that all changed, of course, with the reintroduction of El at the end of the second season. Of course, Mike still helped figure out how to stop the Mind Flayer without killing Will, but it was at that point that we knew once this was all over, his attention would shift to El in a similar manner.

Now, there's a bit of a difference in the behavior from season 2 to season 3 in terms of how he expresses that "obsession" or as we should probably just call it, "fixation." In season 2, it was driven with the intention of being helpful to Will in any and all ways that he could, whether that be comfort (the scene on his bed where they talk about the Mind Flayer), rationality (helping Joyce, Bob, Hopper etc. figure out the connections and offer useful understanding), or just company for a slowly deteriorating Will Byers, which can be backed up by the way he was solely with Will for a far majority of the season.

In season 3, the fixation he has for El is a little less within the area of his expertise, and lot more forced. And that's not at all to say that he just up and goes to El's cabin at the same time every day against his will lmfao. I really just mean that the organicness with which he latched onto Will's situation couldn't exactly be replicated here. Mike doesn't really get fixated on something without there being an end result or something useful to come out of it. So... that is to say he most definitely still had a goal in mind with his relationship with El. It's really just part of his formula and the recurring patterns presented in each season with every action he takes. Despite being an idiot, he's very methodical in what he does. And that's no different with El.

Mike after getting a girlfriend and thus eradicating the loser allegations:

Basically, what I'm saying is a regurgitation of what plenty of others have said on this app, and it's that he wants very badly, whether he knows it or not, to do one of three things:

for himself to come off as normal and typical teenage boy-ish as possible

for himself to come off as non-homosexual as possible

to prove to everyone that he is not "weird", as so many others have suspected (his bullies, his parents, literally everyone)

But, to be fair, those are all basically the same things. At least in Mike's book. And in his mind, a lot of his issues with not fitting in and the internal fear of being seen have a solution within his relationship with El. With her, he finds an excuse to back out of all of the things that remind him of just how "weird" he is. Turning down Dungeons and Dragons, the Cerebro setup, and indulging in all that teenager-y romance drama and moodiness was so out of character for him, and I feel like that really means something in the grand scheme. There have been many analyses on the stark capitalistic, bright and flashy artificiality of season 3, and Mike was a MAJOR part of that, especially in his drastic change in persona in just that season. (Note this analysis of his clothes in s3 I chimed in on as well, because it fits well with this lmao). Now, so many things that he once loved to do before can now be turned down with the excuse that he has someone. Someone (a girlfriend) that symbolizes (to society and by default, to him) manhood and true maturity and whatnot. She, to him, can be the light at the end of the bleak tunnel called life in Hawkins, Indiana, where he can't be who he wants, but he can settle for a questionable relationship with a friend that excuses all of that weirdness (*cough* queerness *coughcough*) in him that he can't seem to shake without her.

It's smart of him, really. I mean, he likes her! They've gone through a lot together, and having a good friend that he can easily deem as someone he like likes despite not really knowing what he wants is just him taking easy street. Sadly, he neglected to realize that pretending to be in love with someone might cause said someone to fall in love too. Someone innocent, new to the world, and susceptible to that kind of feeling. BAD IDEA MICHEAL.

He saw a lot of the repercussions of that in season 4, where El's feelings came a lot more into play and the whole "being normal" and "getting girlfriends" deal had begun to wear off in his mind. His relationship with DnD came back with that too, and I think it has a lot to do with his realization that he fucked up. Big time. Season 4 is really a whole other story. Basically him trying to salvage their relationship despite realizing his attraction toward her was all a lie. He didn't really like like her, he just liked the idea of being relieved of his societal expectations by being with her. And once he met Eddie and learned that conformity is what's killing the kids, it finally dawned on him that he really dated El solely to conform. And that's fucked up. And he realizes this. But isn't sure how to fix it.

Oh well, that's an issue for season 5 to resolve.

My purpose for writing this is not to confirm Byler or to shoot down M!ileven. All I hope to do is offer script-centered reasoning and analysis for the events depicted in the show, so that it can help connect the dots on what may happen next. Truthfully, whether Mike ends up gay, straight, with Will, with El, or WHATEVER, I truly believe that the narrative in season 4 intends for us to pick up on the fact that Mike has come to the realization that he isn't in love with El, he never was really, and that he is dealing with the shockwaves that his too-young compulsory love decision has wrought for them. It is kind of his fault, because despite being young and stupid when he initiated it between them, she was even younger and stupider and happened to follow his lead. (I love El, I am NOT calling her stupid lmfao I just mean he sort of used her lack of knowledge and experience in society to his advantage unknowingly and led them down the path to where they are now.)

Anyway, that's what I think about Mike's behavior between seasons. Sorry, this was unnecessarily long, but I hope it answered your question LMFAO.

Please shoot me a message or another ask if there's any more questions or thing you'd like me to expand more on! Y'all know I can yap for hours over this.