#RIP airplanes points

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Bonus- Chapter 31

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

I am in a food coma right now, I am not going to lie. I went on a double date today that was a donut crawl part 1/2. We went to two local donut shops and sampled donuts- it was so tasty but also, SO MUCH SUGAR.

(I did read the chapter pre donut meal though with some white tea).

Left side Lady Glaze: we rated these 3/5. They were fine. But honestly not as good as they were when they opened the shop! Right side Debrodniks, much better but so sweet 4/5.

We have two more places to check out, but that will be another weekend LOL.

let's gooo chapter 31

I'm three sentences in and already intrigued by the chapter. Although, I am terrified for the nature of the survey questions. p339

unrelated to this chapter- this is such a random thing to include in this book. What I would give to have a glimpse into the brain of MXTX. Like I 100% want to know how this book came together and why certain things were included or not. So good

starting this interview with sass from Binghe AND unanswered age questions that even airplane has 0 idea about. pp339-340

Also airplane with this survey: yeah, let's just not answer these next 30 questions....p340

Airplane: describe each other. SQQ with 0 chill: (not actually but my interpretation of this literature) LBH cries so much, is a little bitch, and is also a big simp. LBH: Shizun is so kind. p340

Wait, this went from kind of awful for the duo to really soft. "What do you hate about one another?" LBH & SQQ: Nothing. p341.

Baby Binghe wants to husband this man so badly. p342

oh god. The fact that LBH thinks the Water Prison was their first date is WILD. p343

"A helpless masochist; beyond cure" not wrong about LBH. p345

My personal headcanon during this interview is that airplane is listening to these two and watching them interact and simultaneously questioning two things; 1. his own relationship dynamic with Mobei-jun and how the two in front of him are a disaster 2. his entire writing of LBH in PIDW and what has become of his beloved protagonist. p347

LOL WAIT. The next page he does indeed reflect on the second thought I wrote and PIDW. p348

"Best way to please your partner during sex" LBH: <confidently> not crying. Pls help this man, the standards LOL. p350

These two are so weird, but they work

I honestly don't know how they work, I don't even know how to describe this couple to other people, but like good for them. What two absolute weirdos. One is trying to actively gaslight themselves into being straight (while actively caring about the other) and the other is just smitten. So damn weird.

ONE MORE CHAPTER TO GO! I hope to read it tomorrow morning (honestly mostly because Monday I want to start on the massive pile of fanfic yall have been so kind to share with me).

[sunderwight]

Shen Yuan who glitches in his transmigration, but the original Shen Qingqiu still dies of a qi deviation.

So the System still needs someone with narrative relevance to throw Luo Binghe into the Abyss. In a fit of desperation, it contrives circumstances after Shen Qingqiu's death to move Luo Binghe to An Ding Peak (not that difficult), and then the System makes Shang Qinghua be Luo Binghe's new scum master who casts him down.

Airplane's thrilled, really. Cultivators aren't supposed to get ulcers but damned if he doesn't come close to one anyway. Between Shen Qingqiu and then just a while later Liu Qingge both dying from qi deviations, and Shang Qinghua looking like a stiff breeze could take him out any day now, poor Mu Qingfang is also just about at his wits' end.

But it's not all bad news! On An Ding Peak, Luo Binghe actually finds himself surrounded by the kinds of people who are accustomed to being bullied by the rest of the sect. So they're pretty sympathetic to him, and it's easier for someone with basic laboring skills to advance on that peak too. His chores don't decrease too much, but he actually gets rewarded for doing them well, and no one tries to kick him out of the dorms or anything. Shang Qinghua doesn't either go out of his way to bully or praise Luo Binghe, correctly reasoning that his best shot at not getting a gruesome death is to just be a more forgettable bad guy than an abusive dirtbag or a heart-wrenching betrayal. He doesn't sabotage Luo Binghe's cultivation (no point, and it would just farm resentment later) but he also doesn't go out of his way to help him improve (not gonna arm his inevitable maybe-probably-murderer with better weapons!), so Luo Binghe's situation sees an overall improvement but not the zero-to-hero treatment he'd have got with Shen Yuan either.

When Shang Qinghua shoves Luo Binghe into the Abyss (he just full on picks him up and tosses him like a sack of beans, better to rip it off quick like a bandage), LBH is upset, but he's not especially surprised or dismayed about Shang Qinghua's part in it. Later on he'll be kind of confused, because he just assumed that of course the righteous sect cultivator would abhor the demon, but it turns out Shang Qinghua has been working for a demon since before Luo Binghe even came to the sect? But then it still kind of makes sense because a Heavenly Demon would definitely pose a risk to Mobei Jun and to Mobei Jun's rule. Shang Qinghua, he supposes, is just really loyal to his specific demon.

Luo Binghe's subsequent revenge quest is also somewhat mitigated by the Abyss actually not being that bad.

The Abyss is not actually that bad thanks to the glitched out Shen Yuan having been camping there for several years now.

So when Shen Yuan's transmigration failed it failed because he "woke up" during the process, realized where the System intended to put him, was like no way in goddamn hell am I being that guy about it, and actually kind of won the ensuing tug-of-war. The System couldn't put him in Shen Qingqiu but Shen Yuan didn't want to go back to his dead body either, so he ended up stuck in the nearest available space for lost interdimensional beings. Which was the Endless Abyss.

Luckily Shen Yuan's quasi-transmigrated imparted an equivalent cultivation level as Shen Jiu's to him, and the glitch made him able to sense and manipulate certain extra-dimensional energies, so he manifested as this weird godlike being able to manipulate and control aspects of the Abyss. So he set about transforming Airplane's Torment Nexus into a viable ecosystem (the current version would not be anything approaching sustainable were it not for divine/narrative intervention, and is constantly on the verge of destabilizing into unlivable ruin that would only be fit for some particularly hardy microorganisms).

It's still like, a monster land full of demonic creatures and terrifying phenomenon, but with Shen Yuan's assistance it becomes something more like a demonic wildlife reserve than a dimensional horror plane. Though it is still a dimensional horror plane, and Shen Yuan is its chief dimensional horror. He treats it sort of like those dungeon building or wildlife park sims, figuring out how to keep everything in balance while still preserving all the interesting parts. A lot of the extreme survival issues of the Abyss are more of a result of it being environmentally unstable than a result of its actual denizens, and once he smooths out a lot of the messy dimensional edges and creates stable vents for the fluctuating energy run-off, the demonic inhabits start behaving less like horror movie monsters and more like animals. They're still wild and dangerous and prone to killing one another, but also more cautious, and able to access enough stable resources that they can even start to be picky about what they pursue.

Turns out that a lot of creatures in the Abyss actually don't like fighting and dying and being brutally injured on a regular basis, even if they can heal from it!

Shen Yuan has even discovered that some like chin scritches (he's not terribly worried about habituating them to people, given how rarely any people actually access the Abyss, but also because he's not really all that people-ish himself these days).

This means that one of Luo Binghe's first encounters with the horrible creatures of the Abyss, is in fact a pack of wolf-like monsters thoroughly avoiding an actual fight with him. In fact most of the denizens of the Abyss just avoid him. They can smell the Heavenly Demon energy rolling off of him, and given the current abundance of alternatives to dealing with that, virtually none of the monsters actually choose to challenge him. There are still a few that will go after anything that's bleeding, but that problem stops once Luo Binghe's physiology heals his wounds, which takes like... a couple hours, max.

Despite the stories he's heard, Luo Binghe is relieved to find that the Abyss is not quite so terrible as all that. Normal survival skills suffice for seeing him through much of it. He's able to hunt for food, scavenge for tools, and even finds potable water fairly easily. After a few weeks, he also comes across a ruin which seems to be inhabited.

The being inhabiting it is plainly a god, although he demurs and refutes such assertions whenever Binghe is too frank. He's a strange being, at turns looking like some queer approximation of a human, at other times blinking and winking in and out of existence, in patterns of strange lights and oddly geometrical fire. But he's surprisingly not hostile, letting Binghe rest in his residence, and even directing him towards points of interest. Accompanying him, too, though he seems to think that Binghe doesn't notice the odd almost spiderweb-like patterns that appear on things which he's influencing. The god calls himself The Peerless One, or at least that's what Luo Binghe infers from some writings on the ruin. The Peerless One offers instruction, seemingly without thinking about it, and gets flustered at being addressed by title, so Binghe also begins to refer to him as Shizun after a while.

[azu1as]

bingqiu au where sy is thrown into the unexpectedly female body of sqq. so when sy finds out, he gets carried away with the bright idea that the best way to avoid the terrible fate of the original goods is to take on the role of a mother-figure for luo binghe.

after all, in pidw there were only two roles for good-looking women like him (and really he didn't expect the original goods to look this good actually. no wonder airplane never posted official art for this man—woman?—the dudebros would definitely clamor to make sqq part of binghe's harem despite all the abuse and torment he—she??—put the man through) that won't end in getting his entire body ripped apart: a) fall in love with luo binghe and join his harem or b) be a mother-figure for binghe and tragically die.

his prospects were, at face value, not very promising. he wasn't female so he couldn't possibly fall in love with binghe so sy has no choice but to follow through with the latter.

the system is surprisingly silent when his mind races through the idea and doesn't raise any complaints about sy messing with the plot this way.

sy believes that, with all his stock knowledge of murim and fantasy worlds, he can avoid the fates that often befell these types of characters—often sacrificial deaths that lead to the protagonist's next power-up. he could gather all the artifacts for level-ups and give them to binghe at the right time!

another good way to lock in on the surviving mother-figure role is by promising to be present during the protagonist's wedding. so he does just that (not understanding the dazed look that enters his bun's face) and, to really make sure, also promises the same for all of binghe's wives (to ning yingying, luo mingyan, wife #124 a defected qiong ding disciple, etc.).

suddenly, everyone in cang qiong is abuzz over rumors of sqq wanting a wedding/looking for a husband/getting wedding fever/etc. the rumors have all jumbled up at this point into a massive mess at this point.

lqg and yqy are trying to figure out if sqq is trying to subtly shoot them a sign by approaching their sister/disciple.

meanwhile, sy thinks that he's totally got this and how on track he is with his plan when binghe accidentally slips and calls him, "mom" one time. unfortunately, all he did was stir up the hidden pseudo-oedipus complex in his poor bun.

[charliemwrites]

It’s been a minute - the last two weeks have been mind bogglingly stupid. But hopefully things are settling now? Idk anyway - consider this something to tide yall over until I can put out the Price/Reader/Simon fic

I am thinking about that threshold of dating when you get past all the prettiness. Like, when being human just becomes part of the relationship. It stops being carefully picked outfits, styled hair, nice perfume/cologne, careful bites of food.

I’m talking about the intimacy of stupid, stupid shit. I’m talking about the first time Krueger calls your name and you reply in a little gremlin voice “wHaT”.

I’m talking about Simon bringing home a treat for you and you do a weird little run, arms swinging and knees coming up too high, to get it from him.

Kyle staring in a mix of horror and fond exasperation as you quote, word for word and perfect intonation, your favorite bit from a YouTube video or tv show or comedy special.

Baffling Nikto by having a stupid ongoing bit that he doesn’t understand and you refuse to explain. Something like, “and I’m gonna eat your captain, of course”. What does that mean? You’re going to eat him?? “Yeah, with salt and butter. Nom nom.”

You pull that bit where you do shitty cosplays of characters. Johnny nearly pissed himself when you wandered into the kitchen covered in green paint with construction paper ears, mumbling in a little old man voice “consume cheez-its, I must, or rip Kenobi a new one, I will.”

Dancing badly, like not even cute badly, just BADLY in the kitchen or while you’re cleaning. It looks almost like you’re having a seizure really. Price is about two seconds from banning that “shake it” song by neon trees

Konig fears “Squirrel Girl” - his pretty little girlfriend disappears to be replaced with this creature that mutters about nesting and acorns and hibernating for winter.

Keegan just about died of embarrassment the first time you pretended his dick was microphone and leaned in close, saying “is this thing on? What’s the deal with airplane food?”

On that note - Gromsko didn’t realize having a pretty little stay at home wife like a traditional marriage meant his dick becomes fair game. She’s grabbin’ him like a handful of candies. When he asks why she points and says “that’s mine by law” and puts a bottle cap on it. “He’s got a hat now”. You make fantastic pies but you also keep asking to hold it while he pees.

You fuss at Velikan to hold still so you can preen in the visor of his helmet. You also put stickers on it and purposefully guilt trip him if he tries to remove it.

Oh and stealing clothes? Oh sure a t-shirt is hot. But their workout shorts? Their underwear or ugly military socks? Sooooo much better than the cute silk set you bought when you first started dating - for you, anyway.

I’m just so here for the weird intimacy of people moving past the aesthetic honeymoon phase of their relationship. Especially when it’s one of the guys who def hasn’t been in a comfortable long term relationship before (like konig or simon).

Same vibes as that time Robert Pattinson invited his stalker out to dinner and she lost interest because he simultaneously so weird but so boring. Not cute weird shit, just weird shit that you would never do in front of anyone else. Stupid, ugly faces and funky voices/impressions and cursed walking/running around.

[tcfactory]

Since my brain has been full of SVSSS brainrot lately:

I want a fic where the transmigration mostly fails and Shen Jiu wakes up from his qi deviation as User002 with the goddamn System treating him like he is Shen Yuan. Trashy yellow book what??? No, he doesn't need stats on his fellow peak lords, if he is supposed to follow a plot then he wants to see the script! You wretched floating rectangle, how is he supposed to play along if he doesn't know the source material?!

The stress of having what feels like a very pushy curse or an insanely weird demon inflicted upon him makes him deviate from some minor plot points and he gets punished for being OOC a couple of times until the System takes pity on him and directs him to Airplane bro, with the very clear suggestion that if he can't remember the early arcs of the story - System understands, User! It's very long after all. UwU - he should go and discuss it with the author.

He basically kicks down Shang Qinghua's door in desperation for some clarity and maybe an explanation, right now before he works himself into a stress-induced qi deviation, Shang-shidi. Shang hamster looks at his miserable scum villain, takes a deep breath, brings out all of Shen Qingqiu's favorite snacks that nobody should know about, makes a pot of calming tea and tells him everything.

Shang Qinghua expects Shen Qingqiu to be angry, to rip into him for writing him into this wretched life. And Shen Jiu is angry, but not at Qinghua. His anxious, mousy little shidi who lives his entire life under the looming threat of a horrible, seemingly unchangeable future doesn't look like a god. Shang Qinghua, who does his best to run his peak well and look out for his disciples despite his admittance that in the story the original Qinghua did a shoddy job - he doesn't look like someone who would have put pen to paper and written a tragedy if he knew it would become someone's reality.

And how could Shen Jiu, who has seen people sell their bodies and their very dignity for a cup of stale water, judge someone for writing a very bad yellow book so he can eat? Please. Peak Lord Shen might have developed a very discerning taste in literature over the years, but you can't fill your stomach with artistic integrity, Shang-shidi. Shen Jiu understands.

So they sit and for that first evening, Shen Qingqiu listens to all the differences creeping into the story, Shang Qinghua's retelling of the drafts he abandoned due to peer pressure, the long rambling tangents of the research he's done, even if they never made it into the story. Qinghua is so caught up in having someone to talk to that he doesn't realize that Shen Qingqiu put everything that happened to Qi-ge together, somewhere between the musings about how a sword inspired by kintsugi would be so cool looking, shame that nobody ever sees the thing, and the griping about how much one of his patrons complained about Yue Qingyuan dying without ever drawing his sword.

Later, when the snacks are gone and the tea is replaced with something stronger, he tells Shen Qingqiu about the stories he really wanted to write. About how he shamefully sneaked his dream man into PIDW, just so he could have some small part to himself, and oh, Shen Qingqiu will have to remind him about demon courting practices when they are both sober again, because it sounds like that Mobei prince is down bad for him.

He leaves that night with a newfound determination. Shang Qinghua might be resigned to the whims of his System and the shackles of the Plot, but Shen Jiu didn't burn the Qiu manor down and break his chains to give up so easily. This is his world, his sect, his Qi-ge on the line, and he would sooner wrest control from the System and become custodian of the world himself than let something take away and ruin what is his. He is the strategist of Cang Qiong Sect, there is no situation he can't think a way out of and he has had enough of tragedies.

Before any of that, however, he needs to go and have a good yell at his Qi-ge, smack his stupid face and then curl up in his arms for a good night's sleep. It's long overdue.

[samandcolbyownme]

OOO can you write fem reader x jake fluff to smut? Like reader having been away to film a vid with sam n colby in another country and she finally gets back? love your writing its MWAH

Warnings: strong language, sexual and suggestive language, hints at sexting, fluff mostly I’ll do a part 2 at some point

Enjoy!

══════════════════

“I bet Jake is itching to see you.” Sam chuckles, “This is the first time you’ve been away from each other for more than a few days right?” You look at Sam and nod, “Two days is the most, anything more is..” you sigh and shake your head, laughing as the flight attendant announces take off.

You make sure neither boy on either side of you are looking at your phone before you open the thread because as you suspected, photos you sent Jake to hold him over for the duration of the plane ride are on full display.

You text him - quickly, On the plane getting ready for take off. I love you. I can’t wait fuck, I mean hug and kiss you. You hit send and put your phone on airplane mode. You get out your headphones, slipping them over your ears before you turn on your music.

You smile as one of Jake’s favorite songs plays. You try to follow along to the words, the beat of the music, but you just can’t.

You were needing Jake.

Craving, aching, yearning for him.

You knew you were flying home to some good welcome home sex, but you needed to calm down now. You glanced over to the window, smiling at Colby when he looks over at you. He gives you a thumbs up and you nod, giving him a thumbs up back before resting your head back.

You needed Jake’s hands on you. Recovering your body in his fingerprints, his touch that makes you weak no matter what way he touches you.

You tried pushing the thoughts away, mainly because they were just causing you to be uncomfortable because you were forcing yourself to sit still. You were scared to sleep. No matter how tired you were, you didn’t want to risk announcing in your sleep to the whole plane that you’re having a wet dream.

You took a deep, quiet, and calming breath before closing your eyes. All you could picture was seeing Jake in the airport. It’s going to be late when you get in, but you know neither you nor Jake will be tired once you get your hands on each other.

You eventually make it through the long flight, basically if you didn’t have Sam or colby to talk to, you would have died from boredom.

As you make your way off the plane and to the baggage claim, you feel your heart start racing faster and faster. You felt like you were meeting Jake for the very first time all over again.

You love and hated it.

“So you see them?” Sam asks and Colby looks around, “No, not yet.” Your eyes search the crowd around you and you suddenly spot Jake over everybody.

You gasp, tapping Colby’s side with your hand, “There.” You point and Jake and Johnnie wave. Sam looks at you, “Go.” He nods towards Jake, “I got your bags.”

You smile and let go of your suitcase, ripping off your backpack and taking off towards Jake. As soon as you’re close enough, you push yourself off the ground, leaping into his open arms.

He catches your and your arms and legs wrap around him. He hugs you right, “Mmm.” He squeezes your body, “I missed you.” He leans his head back and scans his eyes over your face, “Gimme a kiss, sugar lips.”

You laugh and lean in, pressing your lips to his. His arms tighten around your body and he hums lowly, “I hope you’re not tired.” He chuckles and leans back to look at you.

You bite your lip, “Don’t worry, I feel a second wind coming on.” You smirk and he nods, “Good, because I have a schedule, and it’s a lengthy schedule.” He winks and you laugh. You honestly wouldn’t be surprised if he did have a schedule.

You talk amongst each other, mainly about the investigation, as you make your way to his car. Colby leans forward once he shuts the door and you look over at him, “What’s up?”

“Is it cool if we find a close hotel to crash at?” Colby asks and your eyes move up to Jake. You look forward to hide your smirk and nod, “Yeah, I think that’s a good idea.”

══════════════════

Thank you so much for reading! As always, let me know what you thought. I love you all! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[anachronismstellar]

Another week another post of Airplane vs The System.

No, these are not following an order, my brain is scrambling this as we go lol

This is going to be posted on ao3 as soon as I finish it, I swear, I just- I just wanna finish it before posting so I break my fanfic writer curse orz

God Airplane, pls let me finish this 🧎‍♀️

Anyway, I hope you guys enjoy it :D

RIP Mobei-Jun born to be a powerful demon king, forced to play crazy sci-fi pc game 😔

---

The next time Mobei had woken up, he had felt slightly better. At least the headache was gone, and thankfully he could move his arms and legs. He still was encased in a white room, magical cool lights hurting his eyes, as if he were surrounded by fresh fallen snow.

“Welcome, Character_s201,” the voice from the Thing echoed around him, making him jump on his feet, a bit wobbly but ready for an attack. And just like their previous interactions, the Thing paused, waiting for his response, not bothered by the lack of it. “Very well. The parameters of this experiment are: to cross the chamber.”

A door, that he could swear wasn't there before, opened up in front of him showing a long corridor, the same cold lights following all its extension. To his side, a square blinked into existence, as if the writings of a talisman were held afloat in the air, in the center a repetition of what the Thing had said, with a small counter under it, a quarter of an hour time set going down.

Mobei wasn't stupid, and he wasn't about to test what would happen if the number reached zero.

He didn't run, because only fools would run straight to an unknown room. Still each step echoed as if he were walking over thousands of swords, the metallic sound making the hairs at the back of his neck stand up. He kept going, touching the walls from time to time, until he reached the end, a doorless opening exposing a perfect square room with no floor, only another opening on the other side of it, a good distance separating him from his goal. He looked down, only darkness stretching far beyond he could see. Another glance at the instructions showed him that nothing had changed except for the time, ten minutes passed after he was made to leave his previous cell.

He flicked his wrist, grabbing the threads of space, tearing reality apart until a portal appeared next to him. Again, he wouldn't be stupid to try escaping right now, no, the Thing was watching, It had said it was an experiment. So he conceded for now, extending his portal to the other side of the room, crossing it with ease.

“Congratulations, congratulations, congratulations!” the Thing announced as soon his feet touched the floor, the time freezing, the passage closing behind his back. “Important things must be told three times! The first chamber was completed in eleven minutes and fifty seven seconds. Please proceed to the next chamber.”

Mobei looked around, considering his options. What was the point of all this nonsense? What the Thing would gain from making him play such games? Even though curiosity made his throat burn, he refused to ask, instincts telling him that making questions would be playing right into the Thing's hands.

Left with no other choice, he walked. This time the next room was just around the corner, even bigger than before. As soon as he stepped inside, the door slid close, blocking his way back. A few steps ahead there was a wall made of glass, and on the other side of it, laying on a pedestal made of sharp angled metal was a sword, the blade the deepest blue Mobei had ever seen. Frost gathered around it, wisps of smoke curling from its sharp edge, as if it was made of shadows.

He wasn't the type of person to carry a sword, he could make his own from his ice, but he could admire a powerful weapon. Even behind the glass he could feel the cold energy coming from it, a hum in the air that made his teeth ache.

“Welcome, Character_s201, to the second chamber. Experiment parameters are: acquire the sword.”

Once more the voice came from everywhere, startling Mobei enough to make him blink. It was disconcerting to be bossed around by something he couldn't grasp.

Or punch.

And just like before the sign next to him blinked, the time now set to ten minutes. He held back his scoff, better not anger the Thing, but it felt as if It was just playing around, not actually giving him a challenge. With two portals he was in front of the pedestal, hand hovering over the handle, eyes looking up, waiting for another comment. When nothing came he took the sword for himself, the weight of it grounding him, as if confirming that this wasn't a crazy dream.

“Congratulations, congratulations, congratulations, Character_s201! Good things must be told three times!” It cheered on him with fake happiness. “Sword “Tengliu's Fortune” added to your inventory. Second chamber was completed in six minutes and forty nine seconds. Please proceed to the next chamber.”

Mobei-Jun looked around, searching for the next door. Maybe he should go back from where he came? But that made no sense, there was nothing else in that room.

A “ding!” sound rang in his ears, a new door appearing at the back of the room. He hesitated, the grip on the sword tightening up, waiting for an attack. He wouldn't be given a sword if something wasn't about to jump on him.

Then he felt it, the moment the air pressure shifted, the floor under his feet vanishing as the voice cheerfully announced:

“Experiment parameters are: survive.”

Mobei fell.

---

[starryeyeddreamer21]

Characters as things I've said/heard people say

I went to the fair with my family so you get this

---

Angel: No regrets, if we die good riddance

----

Cherri: I would strap myself to a bomb for fun

----

Charlie: I haven't pet a cow in too long I think

----

Vaggie: *furious* All because I can't crochet

----

Husk: if I was a goat I'd uhhh umm I don't know I'd probably just be a goat... Sleep maybe?

----

Angel: I'm going to touch your ankles

Husk: What are you, some kind of Victorian pervert?

----

Charlie: *gasping and pointing to a sign* SUPER FRIED CHICKEN

Angel: Lame I want super SUPER fried chicken

----

Alastor: *watching pork roast* Gorgeous

----

Charlie: *feeding Vaggie* here comes the airplane

Alastor: ... That was embarrassing for both of you

----

Vaggie: *watching a man dressed as a cockroach walk by* The men have started morphing into their true forms

----

Cherri: Wouldn't it be funny if this place got set on fire

Charlie: No??? There would be a stampede

Cherri: Oh damn I would die

Charlie: No, you would stampede?

Cherri: I wouldn't run

Charlie: *sigh* yeah, of course not

----

Sir Pentious: If I died on a rollercoaster my last words would be "Wahoo"

----

Nifty: I need to destroy, I need to rip something to shreds with my bare hands

----

Lucifer and his Candy apple adventures a saga:

Lucifer: *holding a candy apple* oh hell yeah I'm gonna fuck this shit UP

-

Lucifer: *spits seed at Alastor*

Alastor: *doesn't notice*

Lucifer: *spits seed at Alastor*

Alastor: *looks around* ???

Lucifer: *spits seed at Alastor*

Alastor: *looks back at him* What are you doing?

Lucifer: Huh?

Lucifer: *spits seed at Alastor*

Alastor: WILL YOU STOP

Lucifer: What are you talking about????

Alastor: You're throwing something in my hair and on my shoulders and back-

Lucifer: *singing* head, shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes!

(my sister never figured out what I was doing 💀)

-

Lucifer: *still eating his candy apple* Why am I eating this like a chicken wing?

Charlie: Is that not how you're supposed to eat it?

Lucifer: You are absolutely right

-

Lucifer: *covered in candy apple* I'm sticky 🥺

-

Lucifer: *done with his candy apple but still chewing on the stick*

Alastor: *takes a bite of a mozzarella stick*

Lucifer: *gasps* MOZZARELLA STICKS

Alastor: *dips mozzarella sticks in marinara sauce and holds it out to Lucifer*

Lucifer: *reaches for it*

Alastor: *takes it back and glares*

Lucifer: what? oh- weirdo *eats it from his hand*

----

Lucifer: Can you bring me to the bathroom?

Alastor: I'm not carrying you

Lucifer: *rolls eyes* can you walk me to the-

Alastor: I might be able to find you a little red wagon

Lucifer: I'm going to punch you

----

Cherri: Froot loops are just-

Angel: *nods seriously* Gay Cheerios

----

Charlie: I need to find a bathroom to cry in asap

----

Vaggie: She's either drunk or high off something

Angel: I think it would be easier if I was high

----

Charlie: All I can smell is weed

Angel and Cherri: *deep inhale*

Charlie: NO

----

Alastor: Ugh there are so many people

Lucifer: I know I'm dying

----

Angel: *gasp* MY PHONE IS ON ONE PERCENT

Alastor: *completely monotone* oh no the horrors

----

Stranger: Is that your dad?

Husk: Do I look that old?

Angel: No, we're married

Stranger: Oh... you're married

Angel: *laughing* No

Husk: DO I LOOK THAT OLD????

----

Lucifer: *singing along* I can count on you like 4 3 2 you'll be there

Alastor: No I'd leave you

Lucifer: Yeah I know

Alastor: Like everyone else

Lucifer: oh

----

Nifty: *staring at crystals* Do I think they could heal me? No, I am beyond repair. Do I think they're so so so so pretty? YES!!! I NEED THEM

----

Lucifer: *overstimulated, angry, and grinning with tears in his eyes* I wish I could enjoy things

---

[obzessed]

HP characters : powerpoint presentation headcanon

This is so random but here is how I imagine marauders' era characters doing a powerpoint presentation

The Marauders

Do over the top presentations, (down to using costumes, yes) would make the wildest powerpoint (too many colors because they can’t agree on anything)

They make it really fun and entertaining tho

use the airplane (flying broom ??) transition, except the airplane is on fire for some reason

indian drama level of presentation

Will Not stop giggling and interrupting each other

Jocks in middle school vibe, but they’re actually really smart

here to clown and have a laugh

generally get a high grade but get points deducted for clarity and taking too damn long

Severus Snape (+bonus Lily Evans)

In a solo presentation, Severus would make perfect, pristine presentation

King of bullet points

University standards powerpoints

only uses peer reviewed articles

always criticizes said peer reviewed articles

Never uses notes, but doesn't look the audience in the eyes ever

Doesn't look at the audience period

He's not shy, he doesn't even do it consciously

Extremely complicated subjects, Will Not Dumb It Down For You

If anyone has a question, will look at them as if they’re the biggest idiot in the room

The type to explain by simply reformulating what he just said

If they still don’t understand either sighs dramatically and moves on, or sighs dramatically and start drawing on the board, speaking veeeryyyyy slowly, you let me know where I lost you idiot fellow classmate

Actually explains really well when he puts in some effort, has this clean cut way of decomposing each problem and detailing each point, then tying it all back together that makes it really easy to follow

writing on the board and drawing legitimately helps him lay out his thought process

the condescension is just a plus

Type of presentation that is objectively very good and interesting and well thought out but like. no one cares. bring back the airplane transitions.

For a few people sufficiently advanced and interested and who actually understand what he’s talking about, (and who are not rebuked by his style and general attitude), it’s a v good presentation

Positive : Always adds something new and generally brings really pertinent arguments, genuinely passionate about what he’s talking about

Teachers pick up on his fast out of the box thinking and surprising creativity

his powerpoint design is a little depresso, no colors except to highlight important words

very minimalist and to the point

Regulus argues every point of his presentation

Academic rivals to lovers frfr

Gets point deducted for his attitude and his “lack of enthusiasm”

NOW Severus + Lily = best of both worlds, get an O everytime

Lily always insists on using canva (their pwp designs are so cute)

overall they balance each other really well

I feel like Lily would get a little giggly if she fumbles

The marauders would def shout “boring” and giggle like middleschoolers at the back of the class during Snape's presentation

Snape's ability to remain unfazed in the face of bs stems from there

God help them all if they get paired up for a presentation

Marauders + Severus

Snape would have to settle for at least one airplane transition

It would become a war of adding and deleting each other's progress on the pwp design

they split it in two but they try to gain terrain on the other's part like in Clash of Clan

They are at WAR

“I am a commander in battle and your slides are but a village on a map” James Potter

“Fuck you” Severus Snape

“Go jump off an airplane if you like them so much”

Somehow the presentation is even more chaotic than the previous one

passive aggressively asks the other to click on the next slide

always takes the other's question just as they're about to speak

If Snape sees a single one of them look at their notes for too long it's on sight (RIP Pettigrew)

Bc Fuck if he's gonna lose points over this

best or worst grade

lots of brain cells

Teacher tried to make the braincells hold hands but the brain cells are Enemies

[esamastation]

Shizuroth, in which author had a intrusive thought and instead of waking up in the Sun and Moon Dew Flower body, Shen Qingqiu Transmigrates again.

-

Shen Qingqiu hadn't exactly been expecting anything. Dirt, maybe, a forest perhaps - a clearing with a beautiful spring and impeccable Feng Shui preferably, but with Airplane-bro doing the arrangements he hadn't really put much hope into that. Either way, coming out of a plant, he figured there'd at least be soil.

Metal ceiling with bevelled corners and fluorescent lights was definitely not something he'd been thinking about. Hell, he didn't think he'd ever see fluorescent lights again! His new xianxia world didn't even have the concept of electricity, never mind making use of it beyond some lightning-based attacks, and even if he, as an immortal master, lived long enough to see technological progress, why would electrical lights become a thing when night pearls already exist? Never mind glowing talismans and various crystals and gemstones, and honestly, glowing moonlight snail worms in a lantern - and besides, the rules of xianxia basically forbid modern technology, because would it even be xianxia anymore at that point?

And that's completely beyond the point here.

Shen Qingqiu sits up, still staring at the fluorescent light in the ceiling. It's got a slight greenish hue and emits constant low hum of electricity. It looks painfully, incredibly mundane and utterly real.

Maybe it's a dream? He's dreaming of his past life. That has to be it.

Shen Qingqiu looks down and knows none of what he sees. Well, he recognises it - curtains on a frame at each side of his bed, uncomfortable looking chair sitting beside it, a metal bedside table, laptop with sorta janky angular design… Everything looks like it's made of metal, from the walls to the doors to the desk. 

It's definitely no room Shen Yuan had ever lived in. It kind of looks like a hospital bed, but in no hospital he's ever been in.

Pushing the flimsy blanket off himself, Shen Qingqiu moves to stand up, only to stop and stare at his bare knees. He's only wearing modern underwear and the fact that his legs are hairless isn't a surprise - Shen Qingqiu's body is perfectly smooth all over, of course, because xianxia - he's used to that. It's their shape that's new.

His knees look muscled. They begin from - thicc - equally muscled thighs and continue onto shapely calves, and - and who has muscled knees? Honestly, they look like something that belongs to Liu Qingge, not him! Liu Qingge would have muscled knees!

Shen Qingqiu wasn't weak, alright, he trained, he practised with his sword, he could handle himself. He was a master of martial arts too, okay! But, uh, he didn't… exactly… look the part. Nor did he want to! That kind of shape took a lot of work to maintain, and with the Without a Cure poison -

Ah!

Shen Qingqiu quickly puts a hand on his - tight, so tight, flat, faintly ripped, definitely muscled, and now that he's looking, is that a noticeable bulge in his very tactical looking boxers, holy shit, okay, not the time - belly and circulates his Qi.

Correction, he tries to circulate his Qi.

It feels like he's trying to stir a pool of fresh cement with a spoon. There's energy there - a great thick mass of energy - but it doesn't flow. It barely even reacts to his crude poking.

This body hasn't ever cultivated - and yet it is practically bursting with power.

Oh, is that how the Sun and Moon Dew Flower body works? That makes sense. Of course, it's new, so it would've never cultivated, it wouldn't have a shaped core. Honestly, he should be grateful that it has any energy at all! He might've come out of his resurrection without any power at all! Having this much energy to mould into a new core is a blessing. And his veins…

His spiritual veins feel a little burnt somehow, but that's not too bad! Probably just a side effect from all this energy roaming freely in his body. Shen Qingqiu's body has damaged spiritual veins too, he's used to working around it. And either way, the Without a Cure is gone! That's already a huge leap forward for him, even if he had to start from scratch.

Running a hand up and down his - washboard abs, holy shit - stomach, and feeling long hair - so familiar he almost didn't notice - falling down his back, Shen Qingqiu looks up and then frowns.

New body doesn't explain the room he's in. It doesn't explain the electrical lights. It doesn't explain -

A hand rips aside the left side curtain with a screech of metal rings on a metal frame, and a doctor steps into view.

It's unmistakably a doctor, with a white lab coat and clipboard, eyeglasses and irritated expression and everything.

"So, you're up," the man says, looking at him down his nose and sniffing. He takes out a pen and turns his attention to the clipboard. "Well then. How do you feel?"

Shen Qingqiu reframes his world with the swiftness of a practised transmigrator and a liar and hangs his head as though it hurts. Hair falls to curtain his face, hopefully hiding his expression. It's surprisingly pale. Hm. "What happened?"

Oh, nice, his voice is almost the same. A little lower, maybe, but familiar enough.

The doctor glances at him. "Confusion," he says and marks it down. "Not a common symptom for you. What else?"

Shen Qingqiu hesitates, unsure, and looks down at himself. He's got muscles on muscles, and his internal energies feel like a concrete truck ready for a pour, but aside from that there's no clues as to what he's supposed to say.

System? He thinks warily.

He gets the mental equivalent of a busy signal. Which is a… really weird sensation, really.

"What else?" the doctor demands impatiently.

Shen Qingqiu, uncertain, asks again, "What happened?"

The doctor narrows his eyes at him and then scoffs. "The assistant misjudged the dosage. I should've never let him handle your injection, but what's done is done. You received three times your maximum, and your body shut down briefly to accommodate."

… What? What is any of that even supposed to mean? Aside from that last point… that sounded far too familiar. "My heart stopped?" Shen Qingqiu asks slowly, pushing his long bangs back from his face.

"Only for a moment - we didn't even need to resuscitate you, your body recovered on its own - a notable new mutation, which has been added to your file, but unlikely to be very useful going forward," the doctor says, looking at the clipboard again. "It's likely only applicable to specific circumstances, and you shouldn't rely on it in the field. Blood loss will kill you eventually, even if your heart can restart itself, so don't count on it even as a last resort."

… Yeah, Shen Qingqiu has no idea what to make of that. "I wasn't planning on it," he says and clears his throat. This place and this guy is starting to give him the creeps now. "I feel fine now. Can I go?"

The doctor tsks at him, marks something down and tucks the clipboard under his arm. "Fine. Your next dose is in two weeks, on the 17th. Don't miss it."

Shen Qingqiu hums, noncommittal, and misses his fan. If these doses killed the new original goods, he's not sure he'd be taking any more, not if he had any choice. 

The doctor scoffs, reminding Shen Qingqiu for a moment of himself in a weird way - what the original Shen Qingqiu might've looked like for original Luo Binghe - and turns to leave. "Get out of here then, Sephiroth. Your clothes are in the closet in the back."

"... Thanks," Shen Qingqiu murmurs and then lifts his head, feeling his face go slack in shock. There's a strand of pale - silver! - hair in front of his face and thankfully the doctor is already out of view and can see his reaction, because, what…?

… What did the man just call him?

-

So, there was a Whole Train of Thought that brought us here.

[mariyekos]

New DMC Anime Trailer Breakdown, Part 1

Okay so thoughts on the new DMC Anime trailer, which you can see here:

Putting things under the cut!

First things first, it's definitely going to at least take a few things from the DMC3 manga.

Second: It at least uses CGI in part....but more than that, on rewatching it... Are those Agni and Rudra!? Which means it also covers DMC3 in part.

Other fun things to note- I'm not sure if Dante's plate is a reference to anything, but he does have New York plates, so we can assume this DMC takes place in the US, even if the games are ambiguously sort of British/European based on architecture and director commentary.

Going to be honest- I'm not sure if these guys are a reference to anything. If they are, it's going over my head, but I could definitely see them just being generic bad guys/hunters.

Rebellion looks nice here! Also, looks like we're continuing the tradition of Dante getting attacked at his shop, because with a Pool table, jukebox, and the posters on the wall, I'm pretty sure this is supposed to be Dante's shop. Fun that we get a shot of him without his coat too, though he must put it on at another point since he has it in the above shots.

Then we have the exploding plane scene, which afaik is new but also feels very DMC. RIP the other people in that airplane though. Still, I like how wacky and over the top it is!

We also have a demon in the background of this shot...

And someone I'm preeety sure is Enzo (from the DMC3 Manga and Bayonetta!) Although on second glance, this guy looks like he might be blond, which Enzo is not. Still, it could just be a design choice they went with.

Following that is a shot of....probably not Jester because of the short nose, but something I'm sure is connected to Arkham in some way. I want to say they wouldn't get rid of his face scar, so I'm banking on there being a plotline related to Arkham having multiple minions Dante has to take down.

The giant hell portal in the sky isn't super special. We see it in both DMC3 and the old DMC anime, after all.

Then water guy...who I also don't remember as an enemy tbh. Could be new, could be my bad memory showing face. But he's a cyclops with axe hands which is interesting.

Dante's bullets are engraved with Jackpot which I find hilarious but also cool. Just imagining him using magic/demonic power to carve that in is great. I do wonder if they're going to have him reload though? Ebony and Ivory generally use magic bullets as far as I remember, but I know Coyote-A ejects shells. This bullet is shot from Ivory though.

EDIT: Looking at it again, these guns aren't Ebony and Ivory. They're both white/grey. Assuming this isn't them being lazy/an animation error, it might be that this is a real bullet...that he engraved using magic or just special gun stuff instead of just making the bullet itself from magic. I am not interested in guns in real life, but I think guns are supposed to have a function where they leave a mark on the bullets they fire so you can identify which gun shot the bullet? So it could be a human-made modification too.

Then there's the demon he shoots, which I think is a reference to Alice and the demons from the DMC3 manga (and a nice reference to the Sin Scissors and other beings that you can get the kill on with a bullet to the mask).

Not totally sure what the thing Dante shoots is, but it looks to be some sort of pendant. Is it some possessed thing that the girl has? Not super important though, because WHY IS ECHIDNA FROM DMC4 HERE?! Not upset, just surprised. Didn't notice this in my first watch.

After that we get Dante saving a girl from a... car? train? Something getting thrown into a diner that reminds me of the one from the old DMC anime, so here's me hoping we might get some fun downtime scenes like we did in that show. Maybe we'll see a strawberry sundae :)

Actually wait-

STRAWBERRY SUNDAE IDENTIFIED! Also I don't have a picture of her on hand, but is this maybe the waitress from that anime? A younger version? I'll look for a picture later, but for the sake of getting this out earlier than later, I'll just say I'm pretty sure she was a redhead too.

EDIT: Rewatching the trailer, the blue cyclops demon from before is in front of a sign that I'm pretty sure is supposed to say Freddie's Diner like in the OG Anime, so I'm going with the waitress being the same woman or otherwise related.

After that we get what looks to be a human that turned into a demon. My bet is that this guy was always a demon who was pretending to be human, but I think it could be interesting if there was a plotline about Arkham transforming humans into demons while trying to achieve godhood.

And hey look, Dante has what looks to be a stab mark through his chest and a hole in his shirt :) i bet this boy is getting stabbed through the chest, let's gooooo!

EDIT: Back, so I'll continue.

On second glance- wait, these guns are both gray, which means they aren't Ebony and Ivory. I'm putting my money into the DMC3 anime including Dante meeting Nell rather than this being an animation/coloring error.

Aaaand I hit the image limit, darn. Part 2 can be found here.

[bloopitynoot]

Reading SVSSS: Chapter 5

For those who don't know, I am reading SVSSS for the first time and sharing my thoughts!

If you have not read it, there will be spoilers! Consider this a warning.

Also- if you want to follow along, I am aiming to post updates daily. You can find all the posts in the tag bloopitynoot reads SVSSS. You can also check out the intro post for context on my read.

Back at my desk for chapter 5 today, but no Charlie; he has abandoned me :(Tea this evening is Lady Grey with some milk and sugar.

Can you all believe that this is the last chapter of book 1????!?!? One out of 4 done! Anyways- let's get into this short chapter:

OMG. I would have been so pissed if I was transmigrated somewhere and had to start as an infant with my entire adult brain. RIP those circumstances for Airplane (p 264)

Honestly though, I am so here for the argument between Shang Qinghua/Airplane & Shen Qingqiu/Shen Yuan. Fight it out! The fan/not fan and the author who has no idea what's happening LOL

okay but I stand with Shang Qinghua/Airplane -> Shen Yuan really does know a lot of the lore for someone who supposedly hates this book (p265)

Oh god airplane doesn't even know that shen qingqiu here was poisoned (p267)

(okay Re: not knowing about the poisoning- correction he does, I dont know why he was confused about the mushroom side quest though. If anyone has clarity about this comment pls!)

okay but what's this demon- it's kind of scary clever (p269)

the SASS of this system going through an update and only giving automated answers LOL (p270)

it's making me laugh that the actual author and creator of this world cannot recall a single side character's name XD (p272)

+1 to the party! We have Gongyi Xiao (p 275).

what's touching him?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?! (p278) that's terrifying!!!!!

Shen Qingqiu still over here missing his boy. Re: Gongyi Xiao not being as good as Luo BInghe at picking up Shen Qingqiu's subtle non verbal cues while fighting and shen qingqiu being upset by it (p280)

I swear if that slither creature snatches those mushrooms before shen qingqiu has a chance to snag them I will be so pissed on his behalf (p282)

All three of them: WTF is that?!?!?! Airplane side eyeing shen yuan: did I write that tho??? (p.284)

RE: snatching the mushrooms- I don't think it can touch the mushrooms(?)

OMG. Shen qingqiu just made mortal enemies with this fish snake man (p 287)

At this point I don't know if he is trying to gaslight himself. But no matter what, Shen Qingqiu is really convincing people he's a little unwell about losing Luo Binghe. He mentally tells himself he's fine but man is his behaviour wild. (p 289)

OOp. Airplane calling Shen Yuan out about his feelings regarding Luo Binghe 👀 (p 290) Which Shen Qingqiu completely fails to respond to.

That's it for book 1!!!!!

I am NOT ready for the next turn of events. That foreshadowing at the end with this mushroom plot! These mushrooms better survive or poor Shen Qingqiu is fucked.

I cannot wait to start book 2 tomorrow!!!

[thatsrightice]

F-14 TOMCAT ISSUES AND ACCIDENTS

The following is a compilation of issues with the F-14 Tomcat that have been encountered by pilots throughout its lifespan due to both mechanical and other reasons. Some are based on individual accidents and some cover epidemics in which many aircraft were lost to the issue *cough* compressor stalls *cough* basically it’s a bunch of ways you can hurt your fav characters in your fics so if you write something pls let me know cause I want to read it!!!

The issues range from minor hydraulic leaks to an explosion where pilots survive but the aircraft is literally in a million pieces.

LAST UPDATED 10/25/2023

Added some links to relavant FFFOTDs

Side note, the F-14 was a frickin massive tank of a fighter jet. She has taken damage to major components and still been able to land safely, so every situation is pretty unique.

Water Damage- Any type of water intrusion would cause issues with the electrical systems. It was a very common thing, so much so that they would have to duct tape anywhere water might be able to enter as a precaution when they knew it would rain.

Hydraulic Fluid Leaks - The F-14 did leak hydraulic fuel fairly often. There was a joke going around that if there isn't a bucket leaking hydraulic fluid underneath the plane then you are out of hydraulic fluid.

The Staple - On F-14 As and Bs, they would limit the jet to 4Gs maximum for three months and then they would install a metal staple to the bottom of the aircraft just forward of the tail hook. The point of the staple was to prevent severe bulkhead cracks and fuselage delamination by reducing the torquing moments caused by material fatigue. The staple is described as being a 1 foot-long and 1 inch wide solid steel part that looks exactly like a staple. As a part of their pre-flight checks, pilots would have to hang on it to ensure it wouldn’t fall out.

Airbags - Now and then, the airbags would rip and they would have to fix them.

Hydraulic Failures - Hydraulic failures happened somewhat often, but not often enough to be a prevalent issue. Generally speaking, it was common knowledge that if an F-14 wasn't leaking hydraulic fluid then it was out of hydraulic fluid. They would place buckets underneath to catch the liquid when the aircraft was not flying.

An incident from 1988 resulted from a complete hydraulic failure of both the main and the backup systems. They ruled the accident to be caused by the combination of failure of a relief valve and material failure. The Commander of the Pacific Fleet at the time believed that it could have possibly been the result of entrapped air that had been introduced into the hydraulic system through minor system maintenance.

AICS Programmers - They would have to start the airplane and then run the intake ramps aka would have to cycle the intake ramps otherwise they wouldn't be able to get off the ground.

Flap-Slat Lockout - If the flaps on either side of the jet didn't program at the same rate, it would cut it out and lock them up. They were then unable to move them as the lockout was a precaution to prevent asymmetry. This forced pilots to land without flaps, requiring an extra 22 knots during landing. It was difficult to land when they were locked out, and in many situations the end result would be pulling up next to the carrier and ejecting. Flap-Slat Lockout was a consistent issue throughout the Tomcat's life.

Unreliable Fire Warning Light - Sometimes the fire warning light would just barely start to flicker on and steadily become more prominent. Overall "just a bad system." You never actually know if there's a fire or not.

Wings Won’t Come Out - This happened at NAS Oceana. The airplane landed at a speed of 230 mph, so very close to the F-14’s stall speed. When the wings are stuck back, you can't hit the brakes during landing because there is no anti-skid and you would overheat them, if you pulled the stick back you would rotate, and with the wings back you have no spoilers so there is nothing to slow you down. In this particular incident, the pilot was able to take the long landing, but if this issue was encountered at sea it would require an ejection or divert to an airfield nearby if possible. No big explosions or fires though, it’d be a fairly calm procedure and the plane could fly into range of the ship for easy retrieval after ejection.

Low Fuel (Barricade Landing) - Bad weather at night combined with air traffic personnel being too occupied with diverting tons of airplanes, launching tankers, etc. can cause an aircraft to get low on fuel. There was a situation covered in the F-14 Tomcast episode called "F-14 Barricade" where they were unable to refuel using a tanker and were forced to do a barricade landing for their safety. They were almost forced to pull up alongside the carrier and eject. After the landing, one of the crew calculated based on the amount of fuel left that they only had about 90 seconds of flying left. This is literally the only night F-14 barricade landing ever I am pretty sure (in real life Maverick's doesn't count lol). I like it because the pilot and RIO had to tell the aircrew straight up "You have to take us now" because the pilot could no longer see the tape on the fuel gage. The crew tells their story really well and it’s really funny to listen to, especially considering the fact that they had to keep sending them around because they fucked up setting up the barrier.

Hitting the Canopy (During Ejection) - Goose's story is based on a real story in which a RIO hit the canopy during ejection and broke his spine. The reason the pilot does not also hit the canopy is because the ejection sends the RIO out first. The canopy is ejected after a couple of seconds after the handle is pulled, then the RIO is ejected after a second or two, and then the pilot another second later. The ejection seats also launch them in different trajectories so the pilot and the RIO do not collide in the air, meaning they may or may not end up in the same area. The solution would be to wait for the canopy to clear before ejecting but sometimes your don’t have that luxury.

Front Landing Gear Failure During Takeoff- While launching off of the catapult of the aircraft carrier, the nose gear attached to the shuttle broke. The landing gear and shuttle proceeded to the end of the runway without the jet, hitting the end of the ship at 305 knots and damaging the front of the carrier. The jet went off the ship with far less speed than necessary (at barely 60-70 knots) and began falling into the water as it was not enough to get the Tomcat in the air. They ejected to barely 50 feet high and were in serious danger of getting run over by the aircraft carrier. In the accident covered on the Fighter Pilot Podcast FPP004 - Ejection Seats, the RIO tells the story of his survival and the tragic loss of the pilot.

Radome (Nose Cone) Detachment - An F-14 Tomcat lost its radome during a flight due to the failure of the latching mechanism. The radome crashed into the canopy, shattering te glass of the windscreen. The pilot could only see out of a 3 inch hole in the windscreen due to the cracked windshield. He couldn't hear anything due to the noise of the wind in the cockpit, so he was unsure of the state of his RIO but assumed he was unconscious because he hadn't ejected them. The pilot flew over the carrier three times before successfully landing the plane, despite having glass in both eyes and a broken collarbone. It turns out that the RIO had been completely unharmed but with comms down he was unable to tell the pilot such. Upon landing the plane, the pilot was medevaced for eye surgery and then returned to the US.

Midair Collision - F-14A BUNo 159832 was a midair collision between two F-14 Tomcat. In this particular situation, one of the airplanes was able to divert to a nearby airport due to losing part of the right wing whereas the other crew was forced to eject. Obviously you could probably picture a situation where both jets went down.

Landng with Damage - Tomcats are a very sturdy aircraft, often described as being a tank both due to how much fuel they were able to carry and the sheer size of the aircraft. There has been an incident where an F-14 landed without one of its vertical stabilizers. In the Radome Deatchment section, the pilot was able to land the plane. The following video shows an aircraft, although not an F-14, landing aboard an aircraft carrier with significant damage on its right right side.

Single Engine Cat Shot- There was an incident where an aircraft had engine issues the moment it left the carrier. Immediately after the launch, they lost the left engine, and the first thing the pilot did was go through engine failure procedures, wingman at their side. They set up for an engine start using normal air before they attempted a cross-bleed air start using bleed air from the right engine to rotate the starter in the left engine, but neither worked. The pilot addressed the fuel distribution situation by feeding the right engine with fuel from the left to even them out and then they began dumping fuel to get to the "max trap" weight. Upon successfully landing, the Commanding Officer initially believed that the pilot had allowed the left engine throttle to roll back to idle during the acceleration of the catapult stroke, however, after maintenance personnel spun up the engine to troubleshoot, the engine spun well past its normal rpm immediately without the mechanical load it usually carried by the tower shaft meaning that something was very, very wrong. An image of the aircraft after launch can be seen below. Note the singular engine lit up.

F110 Afterburner Failure - The new engines installed were great, but they initially had a problem with the afterburner. In one recorded accident, the pilot lit the afterburner, damaging the afterburner can's lining and leading to an explosion. The Navy prohibited use of the afterburner below 10,000 ft on the F-14+/B/D until the problem could get solved but it took nearly a year to remedy.

"Thump Bang" - The easiest way to incorporate any sort of accident is to call it what the Naval Aviators call a "thump bang". A "thump bang" refers to a series of events that occur when an aircraft experiences some sort of issue they described as a "thump" and then an explosion. It's kind of hard to describe what is like in the cockpit during this sort of accident as it could have happened quickly or could have been a delayed explosion, and it could have been caused by any number of reasons. If they don't know what actually happened, they'll call it a "thump bang" and can only hypothesize what occurred. The likely scenario would have been an issue with the TF30 engines.

TF30 - The "Turd in the punch bowl, " the TF30s had two specific issues that were kind of intertwined.

Throwing Fan Blades - One of the largest issues with the TF30s was that they were with the fan blades. When the fan blades become eroded or damaged over time, they no longer compress the airflow efficiently, potentially leading to an engine stall (see Compressor Stall below). Additionally, the TF30 was known for "throwing" fan blades. This is when the fan blade becomes detached and is shot out to the side into the interior of the aircraft. Not good. Pretty bad actually. They didn't initially know they were throwing fan blades until after a couple of accidents. when they started to be more common they would retrieve the aircraft from the water (if in large enough pieces and then investigate the cause.

Compressor Stall - The actual biggest issue with the F-14 Tomcat and its TF30 engines is the compressor stalling. They literally happened all the time from a variety of different causes. Generally speaking, the compressor stalls were the result of disruption to the airflow into the compressor of the engine. The compressor has fan blades that require the airflow to be undisturbed for maximum efficiency. It was theorized to be the result of foreign object debris (FOD) ingestion into the engines. They check religiously for loose objects on the airplanes as a result, oftentimes having a crew member dive into the intake ducts to check for loose bolts. Additionally, compressor stalls could be caused by operating the aircraft outside of its limits, improper handling, etc.

The F-14 had a gated afterburner, meaning it had 5 “gates” inside of the afterburner and each one lit up a flame rack. There was no variable thrust, so it had to be either on or off. Each of the five racks was labeled as a zone. Zone 3 is what they were allowed to take off with. Coming in or out of afterburner with any angle or attack would cause the compressor to immediately stall. This was mostly due to poor design of the intake.

In general, approximately 30% of F-14A losses were attributed to high-altitude compressor stalls. When one engine stalls, more often than not it will induce the other engine to stall as well. There is a procedure to counteract the compressor stall, the specific protocol was to ease the amount of Gs, slow down, the T.I.T. would go crazy and you shut it down. Or in fighter pilot slang, “ease, slow cook it, shut it down.”

One incident in particular that was assumed to be caused by engine failure resulted in an explosion that looked so bad it was a miracle the pilot and RIO survived (see image below). The pilot escaped with minor burns to his hands, face, and neck and was able to fly within a couple of weeks. The RIO sustained more serious burns on his hands but was flying again after several weeks.

Not Touching Them For Two Days - True story; they flew best when they were used a lot.

[porlatamconlouis]

louis in panamá! louis back in latam!!! louis is back in his spirit home!!!

the crowd was amaaaazing! listen, every louis show i've been to holds a special place in my heart for different reasons. but being in a crowd where everyone around you gives out the same energy, even when they don't fully know some songs, is something i've been craving for a long time now, and it's just the beginning and i'm sooo excited. the venue itself was kinda meh inside, the way they used the space was terrible in my opinion but as a brightside, gaby and i had lots of space to jump and dance and lose our entire minds.

the setlist order change threw us off, but god i love it. the 'chemical' cover... idk how to explain it but the videos i've seen so far (which haven't been many, i'm on wifi most of the time) don't do it one bit of justice. his voice! his voooooooice! that's all i kept saying throughout the song. because i didn't know the song, and the arrangement was so punk that i thought it was a song from an early 2000s pop punk band that i wasn't recognizing. but duuuude, his voice. i hope we get a good version, because that boi whined away with his whole chest... honestly. and i can't fucking wait to see how more and more comfortable he'll get with the song and more people singing it with him, and just... yeah!

oli, krystle and helen were in the open space where there were no chairs, right in front of us... oli walks to not draw attention to himself, but boi, most of us know you by now. i didn't see anybody coming up to them which was nice. they went to the sound booth for a big chunk of the show. and during ooms krys and helen came back to jump and dance to the side there. i loved seeing them like that!

the happiness we felt when we saw lucia coming down! gaby and i were jumping up and down screaming "lucia! lucia is back! lucia!", hajshajshs. and theeeen, at the end, as i always do if possible, we went to the soundbooth to thank my friends (jdelf, tom and oli c.) for the show, and we thanked them for bringing lucia (the lightbulb) and not leaving her behind, and they were amused (and probably a bit weirded out (they've seen me in the same shirt at least 4 times lmao)) and saying thank you for appreciating them and just yeah. i like to think maybe they already knew her name was lucia, but also, i'm glad someone on the ground straight up told them how fucking appreciated she is. 💚 look at herrrr! (lol)

living all my favorite songs live again was so cathartic. didn't know how much i needed it, wow. also, how are we gonna call that insane set of songs before the encore? my vote is for "rip steve's arms" or "no breathing mix" or "lose your shit time". because going from 505 to bty to kmm to ooms is fucking wild, man. it was absolutely incredible, i think i ascended a little bit and was fully exorcised, thanks.

oh! the kmm lights? soooo good! i know they've been done at all the shows after '22 but like... idk. it felt a bit extra special? and he sensed it as well, he couldn't contain his little smiles. and he gave it a shout out. literally everyone knew they had to do it. so cool!

as a sad note, during sibwawc, the lights from the stage weren't really colourful, they just kinda went from orange to white from what i remember. gaby and i waved our flags for the entirety of the megamix (and a bunch of other songs too, hajshajs, duh) and since we were going off the whole time, and not as many people were, he did see us all the way to the back and pointed at where we were and we looked at each other and just kept going. we then corroborated our stories in the hostal, hajdhaj. enjoy the following video as if you were next to us and just jumping around, okay thanks (when you see everyone else jump around that's when he comes to our side).

anyway, i wrote all of this while on the airplane that's gonna take me to puerto rico, which is a bit delayed. oh, and el puma rodríguez is on this flight, lmao. iykyk. some ladies, while boarding, just stood in front of him and took a selfie, eeep. right, here's some carpet photos.

i'm so lucky i get to do this insane adventure, i'm so happy.

(meant to save this in drafts while the video uploaded but guess it got posted instead, hajshajsh. anywaaaay... thanks for the lovely notes, loves.)

[fistfuloflightning]

Slightly more polished version on ao3 here

They're summoned to a local fishing village to investigate some kind of water demon. Just the three of them, which Shen Yuan thinks is hardly fair. Sure, there’s Shen Jiu, who’s worth at least four decent disciples. Shen Yuan doesn’t think he’s too bad. But Shang Qinghua is so far out of his depth it’s almost funny.

They find out it’s a carp demon, old and hungry and slowly picking off the locals over the span of months. Trapping it is the hard part and it goes wild when it realizes it can’t go anywhere. Which Shen Yuan kinda wishes it wouldn’t, since he’s currently hanging above the thrashing water by one leg and staring down into the gaping maw of the carp demon and wondering why all of this feels so familiar.

Shen Jiu is shouting from the side, sounding panicked. But Shen Yuan sincerely hopes his shixiong (bestie? fbf? boyfriend? what the hell?) doesn’t try to play the knight in shining armor (…again).

But it’s actually Shang Qinghua who frees his trapped leg for him, even though it leaves him cursing the An Ding disciple and plummeting into the disturbed water far below. There’s a glimpse of horrified green eyes, then he’s past. There’s no time to worry about Shen Jiu’s weird hero complex at the moment.

But there is a moment of revelation though, the moment before he hits the water: he knows why this whole situation is familiar. Change the demon, change the people dealing with it. But it’s the same. …Fucking Airplane.

And when the demon is suppressed and Shen Yuan drags himself up into the wharf, he’s spitting water and furious. “You fucking ripped off Journey to the West, didn’t you?”

Shang Qinghua’s eyes grow wide for a split second before the biggest grin practically blinds Shen Yuan. “Do you like that movie too?! I thought I was only one!

“I hated that movie.”

Shang Qinghua has the gall to look betrayed. “But Stephen Chow is a national treasure! It’s hard not to be a fan!”

“And it shows in your writing.”

“What does that mean?!”

Shen Yuan is relentless. “So you don’t deny it.”

“It was a good movie,” Shang Qinghua mutters defiantly, as though that’s going to change Shen Yuan’s mind.

But before he can snap back, Shen Jiu is dropping from his sword and grabbing his shoulders to examine him for injuries. “You absolute fool,” he hisses.

He very easily ignores Shang Qinghua in favor of a much prettier face. “A fool for you.” Shen Yuan’s hazy grin is all that saves him from Shen Jiu’s sharp tongue

“Focus.” His eyes flick between Shen Yuan’s, looking for—what? Concussion? His hands don't leave Shen Yuan’s arms, as if afraid he’ll disappear too.

It’s only afterward in their shared inn room that Shen Yuan fixes a gimlet eye on Shang Qinghua. He’s glad Shen Jiu left to check in with the local magistrate, if only so he doesn’t have to explain more than he has to. “You plagiarized the whole beginning scene—didn’t you. Even the little girl, you sick freak. Is there not a single original thought in your head?”

“The girl lived! You saw it! It’s completely not the same! And you have no room to talk, Mr. I-hated-it. You even remember what happened in such a short scene. Even if you deny that, you liar, I know you like the monsters I made up,” he points out. Now that a scowling Shen Yuan can’t deny. Shang Qinghua’s brow rise pointedly as he adds: “…And my bastard son. When’s the wedding, by the way? You’ve gotta make a honest man of him sometime.” A thought suddenly comes to him and he freezes. “Wait. If you got married, would that make me your father-in-law?”

Shen Yuan gags. “Never refer to yourself like that ever again. I hope Stephen Chow finds a way to kill you in your sleep. And if he doesn’t, I will. We never speak of this again and I pray to any bodhisattva who decides to have pity on your sorry ass, that you have not plagiarized any more of that movie. Especially the pig demon.”

Shang Qinghua’s sweating silence says more than words.

“…Are you fucking kidding me?!”

[incognito-lionbeast]

Also, sitting here thinking about a Mundane AU where SY & Airplane actually meet IRL. Like, at some point during one of their many needless arguments online, Great Master Airplane dares his almighty hater over DM’s to meet him at an upcoming ACG* convention to yell In Person if he’s so mad about it-- not even once considering that Cucumber might actually accept the invitation. Shit, now he’s gotta find money to go to a convention?! He’d already nearly wrecked his computer earlier this week...

They’re both a little stupid & in too deep to back down. RIP Internet Safety, but at least they’ll be in literally one of the most public places possible, right... haha...

It’s agreed that they’d meetup by one of the Official booths (of a shared interest), and shockingly Airplane is the first one there. Just. Awkwardly piddling around on his phone for a while, honestly hoping that Cucumber-bro had chickened out. Like, sure, he’d have wasted money on nothing, but yknow??? Maybe this wasn’t a great idea???? Actually??

Until he gets a Ping over Legally-Distinct-WeChat, asking if the weird guy in a tacky button-down--the one staring at his phone--is him. And rather, Shen Yuan’s only late because he decided to bring one of his older brothers. Y’know, he has that privilege. Though, upon confirmation that this “friend” of Yuan’s is just Some Guy, his brother doesn’t stick around them too long.

Neither Shen Yuan nor Airplane know what to do. Admittedly, neither had planned past this point. Though, inwardly, Airplane’s a little annoyed that apparently?? His #1 hater is some scrawny, conventionally attractive rich kid.

Outwardly, Airplane decides that he’s going to treat this situation like he would online, as much as he possibly could, anyway. He also refuses to use the very obvious Given Name SY’s brother used, preferring to call SY “Cucumber-bro” -- A little professional distance between he & his loyal “fan”. Not that Shen Yuan is complaining. He’s not sure what he was expecting Airplane to be like, but this annoying early 20-something felt about right.

Though, somehow... all of this accumulates into them just sorta. Hanging Out. Awkwardly at first, but the banter picks up after they’ve had some time to get used to being around each other. If Shen Yuan was the sort of person to admit to these things, he’d almost say he was having fun. Neither of them, but especially not Airplane, have actually had friends to hang out with for a while...

Frankly, Shen Yuan kinda forgot what it was like to be social with people who weren’t family... and after some consideration, he realises this guy seems really lonely. Airplane dodges any conversation about real life, friends, or family like the plague--whether its his or Shen Yuan’s. The only acceptable “family” he’ll talk about is Luo Binghe’s (which, frankly, Shen Yuan is much more interested in, anyway).

In the novel, Luo Binghe’s parents never really made an appearance, so hearing about Tianlang-Jun & Su Xiyan directly from the author was a little exciting?? And maybe a tad infuriating. Wasted potential. So much wasted potential.

At some point, Shen Yuan’s righteous indignation manages to squeak out the confession that Airplane’s dirt poor & gutted his own story because... well, that’s what made money. It is what it is. Sorry you hate it so much, but then--like he’s been saying the whole time, why’d you keep reading it??? Not that he minds. To be honest, responding to your vitriol is the highlight of his day. Wouldn’t be the same if you gave up.

Shen Yuan asks if he’s really happy with that?? And well, no, of course not! But based on how liberal Shen Yuan’s been with his money throughout the course of the ‘con, he clearly wouldn’t understand what it’s like, huh? Angry lil rich kid getting mad online at shit he could easily stay away from. So, unless you wanna admit that you actually really like it, then he’s not accepting criticism at this time. :v

ANYWAY, inb4 Shen Yuan promotes himself from “hater” to “editor” -- nearly on the spot, but he manages to restrain himself til after they’ve parted ways... many days later, still thinking about their conversation. Something, something You can you up...

Which. Of the possible outcomes, Airplane had really expected their meeting to be a one-and-done situation, but now Cucumber-bro’s paying his train fair to drag him & his ~vibrant personality~ out of his comfort zone (his shitty apartment) and back into the Real World. Because this is perfectly reasonable human behaviour?! Though, honestly, Shen Yuan’s family is just happy to see him finally applying himself, so they don’t mind indulging them.

For the record, though, Shen Yuan’s sister is the only one who really knows who Airplane IS... and she thinks it’s really quite funny. And she can’t wait til Yuan’s comfortable enough to actually bring him home. Then she can show Mr. Airplane her brother’s stash of Luo Binghe merch. (✿◡‿◡)

Get adopted, loser.

All in all, though, fine! If this guy wants to throw money at him so they can Fix his story?? Sure, why not! He’d say he’s had worse first dates, but would imply that Airplane’s dated before. And that that first encounter was a date, but yknow in retrospect. Might as well have been.

but anyway, this got way longer than I meant it to. So I’m capping it there. >u< I still have Thoughts (many of them!), but they are mostly “I would like them to kiss.”