#REMEMBER TO TAKE WITH A GRAIN OF SALT

[incorrectquoteswwdits]

HELLO SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP PLEASE ENJOY THIS MASSIVE SPOILER LIKE I JUST DID

A big thank you to Anon for this!!!

SPOILER BELOW

“hello this is a short continuation of spoilers i got from someone who attended the screening so u can post this in a separate post. SO we see angel crowley creating the universe right and aziraphale was there with him . apparently crowley started gushing like oh you are so gorgeous! and aziraphale was like “oh!” thinking crowley was talking to him but then he looked at crowley and crowley was looking at the stars he made HWKSHWHD and crowley was really excited making all the stars and apparently aziraphale can't hide his heart eyes HEKDHJWJSW THAT'S ALL IM GOING INSANE JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS”

[kroosluvr]

welcome to the phantom express (?!)

[erinwantstowrite]

what are your thoughts abot how Damian and Tim's relationship is portrayed in most fanfics?

personally, although I like the angst part of their relationship I wish there was more fanfics where they're closer and have real siblings dynamic (like u know they 'hate' eachother but they would destroy anyone who would want to hurt their brother)

oh, boy, do i have a lot to say about this one. buckle in, folks.

i feel like a lot of the time, if they're in a fic together and the fic author doesn't like one of them, the other is going to be mischaracterized to hell and back. sometimes... both are mischaracterized.

i'm all for a fanon interpretation of a character- obviously, because i have fanon interpretations in my fic too at least a wee bit- but sometimes it goes too far and it no longer feels like we're reading about the same character

let's talk about Tim.

Tim doesn't have a good view of himself or his standing in any emotional aspect. which is often misconstrued about him believing that he was Jason's replacement (neither he nor Bruce thought this, but it was Bruce's fear), or that his worth as Robin wasn't enough. that's not true at all. i'll say it again here: Jason didn't nearly kill Tim at Titan's Tower, nor did he go there to kill Tim. and Tim fought him back. he even told Jason to his face:

"you can't be that good" "I am."

he knows he's a damn good Robin! he trained with the best, he helps lead the YJ! he doesn't doubt that he was the best person for the job. but when it comes to the emotional aspect of Robin, i think this is where Tim stutters

this is because of how Tim's parents showed their affection.

i think canon neglects that aspect of his trauma, which is why so many people hang onto it. in the comics, Tim is shown to have a lot of friends both in and out of suit. he's abrasive and isn't afraid to ask the hard questions. but he is riddled with self worth issues. his parents were barely around him, they didn't know him well at all. and they loved him, but from a distance.

Tim now sees himself as someone that can receive love from a distance. he is incredibly self reliant, and has been from a young age. he sees all of his accomplishments as obligations. he does well at school because he had to. he takes care of himself because he had to. and in his mind, taking up Robin was partly another obligation. he does his job well because he has to, and he might doubt this sometimes like anyone else, but at the end of the day he is confident in his ability to get shit done.

now, the emotional part of Batman and Robin is where i believe i enjoy a fanon interpretation more. he actually does have a good relationship with Dick, but I'm not too sure about Bruce at this point. this topic is nuanced because Batman writers make him so diabolical at times to the point that i would consider it ooc. but other times they're very close and Bruce admits this. so i replace it in my head with a more stable and realistic version that i've seen written by fic authors very well.

Tim views himself as someone who is there for a job: help Batman. but there is a lot of wonder and awe there. his favorite Robin was Dick. (I'll say this again so everyone hears me: his favorite Robin was Dick. yes you are allowed to have nuance and put Jason in there as someone he looked up to as well, please do. but put some respect on Dick's name!) now that he's working with Dick Grayson, someone he admires so much, as well as getting the honor to wear the Robin suit, he feels more like himself than he has in years. he's good at this, and it's also fun. he meets so many people and he gets to make a difference in the world. yes, it's a job, but it's also very freeing

he never did this be Bruce's son, or to replace Jason. his relationship with Bruce started off extremely rocky, with Tim forcing himself into his life in some way because he believed that Batman was going to get himself killed or get someone else killed, or Batman would cross the line. and Gotham would lose the only person who had such unwavering optimism for them. he and Bruce come to an understanding of being partners but not father and son. Bruce doesn't want to open himself up to that hurt again. but we all know Bruce, and that's not what ended up happening. Bruce would never be the same person he was before, but he is not incapable of love.

Tim would not understand that change. I'd get more into this but i don't want this post too long and i wanna save it for when i'm not supposed to be sleeping and when i'm writing one of my Tim fics for once. all we really need to know is that Tim's emotional intelligence is dogshit, and him coming to see Bruce as a father, and Bruce seeing him as a son, would baffle him. because his parents love him... at a distance. and Bruce sees him every day. that's not how it's supposed to work, right?

so.

sometimes, Tim is treated like a porcelain doll who can do no wrong. many aspects of his canon has been altered by fanon to be "worse" than it is. his neglect by his parents did, indeed, happen, and it affects him deeply. but his parents weren't like. beating him, or leaving him without food or shelter or supervision. Tim was clever enough to get around that supervision all on his own. which is why they should have been there in the first place. (they should have been there regardless). and emotional neglect is still a very real issue??? no one has to make it "worse" by making the Drakes out to be monsters. i think Jack often emotionally manipulated Tim when he was around, and I don't know if Jack was even aware that he did so. (which is why i can see some people delving into that nonexistent relationship that DC gave us, and finally giving those implications more depth. there are a lot of good fics that go over this)

often it's hard to read a fic for Tim because they go too hard into making Tim an anxious shy ball of sunshine. Tim is weird, and he stalked the Bats, he stalked Nightwing, he broke into Titan's Tower before he even became Robin. he's a weirdo. he fits right in with the Bats for that reason. some people make him out to be the victim or some kind of damsel in distress, and sometimes we get to see a phenomena where other characters talk like a book about emotional intelligence that their therapist gave them. which is... fine, if you're just writing to write it, maybe helping yourself. but let's take a step back and see Tim is not like that. he is a very capable person, and his not some "uwu, woe is me, i'm so shitty at everything and if you even look at me wrong i'll cry." i honestly believe that Tim is the type of character to hate crying in front of someone and even if he was actively dying he'd be holding back those tears.

whereas Damian? gets the opposite treatment??

granted, i don't actually know too much about Damian, but i at least try to understand him and his background

he's the youngest of them, and i think many people forget that Damian isn't a reader of the comics like we are. he wasn't going into that family with the emotional connections to these characters and their backstories like we did. he was taught about these people, the idea of them. like how we could be taught in class about people from a long time ago. and i can ensure you that Damian was not taught proper emotional intelligence, nor would he have the best grasp of it himself when he was younger than 9 years old. imagine all of your teachers and also your mother told you about these people and their accomplishments, and then told you that the person all of them look up to is your father. the person that you want nothing more than to know, to see, because the people around you talk about him so highly. someone you haven't gotten to meet yet, because you aren't "worthy." can you imagine being told all your life that you are not worthy to see your father yet? and not knowing if he believes that too?

but one day, you are going to be by his side as his son. i don't want to get too into the culture of the Al Ghul family because i don't actually know that much (i'm sure someone would know more about this, feel free to add on if you want to), but this is important to Damian. it's important to his mom. it's important to his grandfather, the leader of an extensive organization that stretches hundreds of years.

then he gets dropped off in a different country, culture, language, and family and he finds that things are not as he had been told his entire life. his father has many flaws, they do not believe the same importance of a blood tie as his family back home does. they question his entire upbringing to his face many times, they question his mother who he loves deeply. he's nine years old. imagine yourself in that position. you don't know yet what role you're playing in an adult's life, but you want to. desperately. you want to know where you stand. you want a hug. not to mention that Damian actually is a very emotional kid. he was taught to shove that deep, deep down, and not let that out.

too many people write Damian as if he was a "feral" kid which is kind of not something to put on him? i don't like it both because he wasn't feral, he was an asshole. there's a difference. and because it feels like a microaggression?? at times?? because once again... the culture that he is from... is important.

they have been racially profiled for many many years... and yes, everything that you read is political whether you want it to be or not. the act of reading is political. you should definitely be aware of what a writer's goal is when they were giving something to you. you should be reading deeper. again, i'm not from his culture and i can't say if it is an insult/insensitive joke or not, nor am i saying everyone who's made the joke before is a bad person. i have made jokes about Tim being a feral kid before and whatnot. i'm saying that no matter who you are, it is your responsibility to think critically about your media and kindly about other people. it feels uncomfortable to me because i know how wrongly the Al Ghuls (specifically Talia) have been treated by writers in the past. and Damian is an extension of that bias. just look at how many times they try to push Ian Wayne on us. or how they'll pull back on Damian's character development when talking about the Al Ghul family.

this probably isn't my topic to write about, at least not before i learn more about it. but since i get a fair amount of viewership, maybe someone will listen to me that won't listen to someone of color that has already pointed this out many times. with the comics fandom, and Batman fandom specifically sometimes, people don't care to think further about why the characters of color are so often and conveniently left out or forced into an archetype. take that as you will

so! he has spent his entire life believing he had to live up to two great legacies, both of which are VERY different. the intricacies of the Al Ghul family are often boiled down to pure evil by both fanon and canon writers, which dulls Damian's resolve and reasoning for what he had done, or makes it hard to connect to him. he has since learned more about who he wants to be and has come to respect his family in many ways. excuse me if i'm wrong, but i think part of why Damian came so hard for Tim was because Tim had everything Damian wanted. he had a place by Batman's side as both his son and his partner, and was very well respected by Batman and Nightwing both. he's older, more mature, he has stature in both this society Damian now has to fit into and within the family dynamic. considering Damian grew up in an assassin cult that solved threats to their dynamics or positions in power by murder, it wasn't a far leap for a child from that environment to make. he was modelling what he had been taught his entire life.

think about the mistakes that you made as a kid. and i don't mean something silly or funny now, i'm talking something that makes you feel ashamed. embarrassed. hurt. something that perhaps now as an adult, you reflect on as being totally uncool. and i want you to think about if maybe your environment had a role to play in that. maybe you made an insensitive joke that your mom or dad would have found funny, and someone pointed it out and reasonably made you feel like a jerk. shit happens. but you hopefully grew from that.

now imagine that mistake was you hurting someone.

yes, he was annoying. he was bratty, at times. he could be a little calculating shit. he hurt people with both his words and his weapons. Tim obviously had many many many reasons to be upset about his treatment- but I fear that most of his anger ended up directed at the older people in their lives that were supposed to be the ones to do something about it!

and though i hate that Tim went back to being Robin (it feels redundant), i have seen panels that show that the two of them working side by side after Damian and Tim both went through some life and perspective altering events both together and alone, has made Tim see Damian as his little brother, and vice versa. Damian has grown so much and many people just... don't care. no matter their reasoning for hating Damian, it's unfair to not look further than those cutting words written decades ago, or to bring up his mistakes every time you want to be mad at him. and i think it does a disservice to Tim to make him a bleeding heart about this when he has clearly forgiven Damian and cares about him. he rags on Damian like any older brother would, and Damian makes remarks like a younger brother would. personally, i think the two of them are doing pretty good right now

the development of their characters is actually so interesting within the canon aspect, even if they can fumble the ball every now and then. and the mischaracterization takes away the value that their canon relationship has. i personally love reading fics that have Damian and Tim teaming up. in aus where one thing changes and Tim and Damian become brothers later, i think it's actually so silly and fun when Damian respects Tim or thinks he's cool. or even without the au aspect! just like, a fic where the two of them are working together and it's either silly or serious, Damian having a begrudging respect for Tim and Tim being protective over Damian, etc etc, is sooooo much fun

[telesodalite]

Never getting over Fulcrum being a project manager...

Idk why, but something about that is so funny to me. Not just because the title of "project manager" is inherently kinda funny for a Decepticon, but also because-

1. It's vague sounding and hard to explain irl because it technically exists in multiple fields, like healthcare or manufacturing, which surely translates into canon in some way.

2. In canon, it's simultaneously a really mundane, innocuous sounding job, yet it's also a super morally awful position to reside over depending on the context. (*cough* forced colonization and cyberforming *cough*)

And 3. It solidifies the fact that behind all the surface level militaristic work we get with both the Decepticons and Autobots, there's also Cons and Bots with "normal" jobs in both factions.

Like, sure yeah we get scientists and doctors, engineers and programmers, but usually in big important or warfront positions. (For plot reasons, understandably.) But it's also really funny and interesting to think of those that worked background positions, or minor jobs.

Like an Autobot working in their equivalent of an HR department, or a Decepticon who runs one of their outpost's or starship's kitchens.

Just all the pre-war jobs that didn't just disappear with the war, but instead evolved to exist within the factions.

It's particularly funny with the Decepticons though, because it could be a super mundane job or situation, but because it's them, it has to have an air of ~e v i l~ to it, either legitimately and/or merely for the vibes, like Tarn's "performance reviews".

[greenfiend]

On the topic of Band-Aids…

Sure Will “ripp[ed] off [the] Band-Aid”, but where did it leave us? It left us with an enormous wound, spreading all across Hawkins.

A heart shaped lake ripped apart in the centre.

Obviously, that wound needs to heal, and somehow I doubt Mike and El’s “love” for each other will help matters. Especially since Mike’s “love” speech to El occurred right before this wound opened up.

People who simply study scripts and script writing only know a portion of what’s going on. A lot of clues come from the visuals and subtleties that are not written on a page.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

if i had a nickel every time magneto, charles, and amelia were all featured on a cover that framed them as having a wack love triangle then im sure im missing more than just these two but im still baffled i naturally found two so easily anyway

[nightwings-robin]

If Jason is responsible for the death of Felipe Garzonas then Bruce is equally as responsible for the death of Felipe's father, José.

I've seen so many arguments and counter-arguments about whether or not Jason actually pushed that guy off of a building to his death, but I have literally never seen anyone talk about the very next issue which involves his father blaming Jason regardless. I didn't know this was a thing that ever happened in the comics until I started reading them in earnest.

This event is often talked about as a defining moment in Jason's time as Robin (and it is) but I think this little arc actually says a lot more about Bruce and fan's interpretations of Jason's actions than it does about Jason himself.

Like just look at this panel from Batman (1940) #425:

Batman is on top of a pile of cars, José shoots at Batman, the tower of cars falls down on top of José and he dies. It's sort of an accident but then Bruce goes on to imply that this guy's death is also Jason's fault:

Bruce is saying here that actions have consequences - the name of this issue is even titled "Consequences" - but the way he says it to Jason implies that these are the consequences of Jason's actions. In Bruce's mind, Jason "killed" Felipe, so his father wanted to get revenge and ended up killed as well. Bruce lays both of these deaths at Jason's feet but I don't think that's totally fair to Jason.

Regardless of whether or not Jason really did kill Felipe, José Garzonas believes Robin is responsible. This sets off a chain of events that leads to José's death. And one could argue that Bruce is actually the one responsible for Garzonas' death as he was the one on top of the tower of cars that falls and crushes Garzonas. I find it interesting that Bruce doesn't hold himself responsible for that, even though it's an accident. He seems to blame Jason for this death that he himself had a hand in because he seems to blame Jason for Felipe's death that started this all.

Maybe Bruce doesn't even think that Jason pushed Felipe off of that building and that he really was just "spooked" off. But Bruce still blames Jason because Jason didn't try to save Felipe from falling. No matter Jason's real actions or intentions, Felipe still died and his father still blamed Robin.

If we go off of the theory that Felipe really was just spooked by Jason and slipped off the building by accident, then Jason didn’t kill Felipe so much as he didn’t save him. Which Bruce has done to KGBeast for example multiple times (no seriously there's AT LEAST two separate times when Bruce may not have killed KGBeast but certainly and purposefully left him in a situation in which death was eminent, but whatever I digress.)

I think a lot of people don't know that that story is actually a two-parter and that the next issue after Batman (1940) #424 deals with Felipe's father trying to get revenge for his son's death and he very clearly blames Robin for it.

Thoughts and opinions?

[total-drama-brainrot]

Total Drama World Tour Assistant Noah AU…

Where Assistant Noah warns Owen before the London Challenge, but Alejandro had heard him…

Alejandro: So, you think that I’m like an eel dipped in grease?

Assistant Noah: Yes, I do. What are you gonna do about it, pretty boy? I’m not a contestant, you have no power over me, Eel!

Alejandro: Maybe so, but I can still use my charms to mess with you, while you’re working.

Assistant Noah: Don’t you dare! >=O

Alejandro: (Smirks and blows Noah a flirty kiss!) ;)

Wasn't it already a pre-established fact that Alejandro was actively flirting with assistant Noah before London? Why would him upping the ante make any difference here?

If anything, have Alejandro seethe over the fact that, despite his best efforts to seem as suave and charming as possible, Noah sees him as an "eel dipped in grease". He's consistantly pulled out all the stops to get a reaction out of Noah - the same tactics that worked flawlessly on the rest of the competition - and yet his best efforts are rewarded with the one person he's trying to get to like him, actively disliking him.

It's a massive blow to his ego and his confidance. But one he can learn from.

Have Alejandro condeed defeat to himself; if he hadn't won Noah over by now, there's little chance he ever would (at least, that's his justification for giving up). Have him stop flirting with Noah - stop interacting with the assistant completely, since he's so obviously disliked by Noah.

And then. Then, you have Noah notice the emptiness in his day-to-day.

You have the both of them turn to make snide comments or backhanded remarks about the goings on in the competition, only to be met with silence and a blank space at their side. You have the both of them cycle through active denial that the miss each other, until the weight of their loneliness crushes their combined stubbornness.

Have Noah sheepishly apologise to Alejandro in the (relative) privacy of the cargo hold, trying to explain that his distrust of Alejandro doesn't necessarily translate into dislike. And have Alejandro forgive him. Not entirely, but enough for the two of them to settle back into a sense of normalcy.

That is, Alejandro habitually trying to flirt with Noah once more, only to be completely blindsided when the other laughs at his attempts instead of brushing him off.

Because that's a sign of progress, right?

[blackbatcass]

actually the funniest flash character in history is mason trollbridge. he was just some bland carpenter dude. he was wally’s old man best friend. they moved across country together. wally LIVED with him. he had a supervillain son that was never followed up on. he was in almost every issue. then waid took over and he disappeared without a trace and was never heard from again

[tarmac-rat]

Something I think perfectly encapsulates the early days of Cyberpunk 2077's launch so well was at one point, once you completed the bender, the game would unceremoniously drop a copy of Johnny's holo-arm in your inventory without telling you. It was equipable, meaning you could put it on whenever you wanted (but I don't believe you could unequip it without trashing it) and it would show up in the game whenever you used your weapon or were in a cutscene. So it was almost like the game was giving you the option to make Johnny's silver arm a permanent feature of your V, implying that it was a part of the Relic's progression, and that you could use it for story immersion or lore purposes, or even just as a cool feature to have in your inventory if you wanted it for the aesthetic

And then CDPR came forward, said "actually this was 100% a bug you're not supposed to get this", patched it out, and we never got it back.

[aster-blogging-dracula]

Damn bro Imagine how dire the situation as a closeted middle aged man in the late victorian times must be that you express your desires by creating a vampire with your boss' face.

(for the sake of accuracy, this a joke)

[their-name-is-fake]

Hey y’all! Just to give some insight into what we are seeing in the states. This is going to be close, like reaaaaallly close. Kamala would need to win Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin from the looks of it. So, where does that leave us? Who’s to say all three of these states are very volatile. There’s a high chance she loses Michigan ( I mena she fully fumbled it there so it depends on if the people choose to over look that), so that’s already bad news. Georgia would have been a good alternative but gerrymandering needed any chance of that.

There is an ever increasing chance that Trump is able to pull what he did in 2016 so y’all need to be prepared for that.

And even if he doesn’t win there is a high chance there will be riots so

[nientedal]

On Constructive Criticism.

Hey friends. You ever want to leave a critique on a fic, and the author says they like constructive criticism/"concrit," but then you leave your critique and you try to make it complimentary but the author still seems less than thrilled with you? You may have missed the point of "constructive!" Don't feel bad, you aren't alone. Took me until I started writing and receiving feedback to really figure it out.

The key to remember is, "constructive" doesn't mean "nice." It doesn't mean phrasing gently, or doing a compliment sandwich (although those are fine things to do as well). "Constructive" feedback is feedback that would make the story as the author has already written it stronger.

"The execution of this character's decision to do XYZ felt a little bit out of nowhere, to me. Was that your intent? It didn't seem like it was meant to be a big twist, either. Maybe some extra foreshadowing would make it stronger, or some shock on the part of the other characters." THAT'S constructive criticism.

This is NOT constructive criticism: "This character doing XYZ thing really doesn't make for as strong a story as it could. I think he should have done NQD thing, instead. That would have been better."

The first example offers some ideas on how to help a character's decision land better when the reader couldn't tell what the author's intent was. It's possible the reader didn't like the decision and that's why they noticed - maybe some foreshadowing would have helped them accept it better, or some indication that it was meant to be shocking would have validated the reader's surprise & displeasure. But, crucially, the reader did not suggest anything that would require a massive rewrite to change. Some tweaking, sure, maybe the addition of a few paragraphs. But not a change to the character's decision as a whole, the way the second example suggested. The second example does describe something the reader thinks would make for a stronger story...but it is not something that would make THIS story stronger. It is describing a different story than the one the author has already written so far, so it's just plain ol' criticism. Constructive criticism makes the existing story stronger.

That's the difference. You aren't workshopping. You are commenting on something that is already being written, that is already planned to the point where someone is already posting it. Or it's already complete!There is a BIG DIFFERENCE between helping workshop a story and simply giving concrit. Unless the author has specifically asked for workshop-style help, offering things to do differently from what was already written is worse than useless. Don't.

Rule of thumb: if what you're saying can be boiled down to "I think this cake would be better if it was pie," say something else. The cake is not pie. It's not GOING to be pie. I didn't ask what you think I should bake, I put cake on the table and asked what you thought of this cake. Tell me what would make THIS cake better. Not the pie you were thinking of, and not a different cake you might have liked better. THIS CAKE.

[qsmp-yaoi-island]

Crazy going into other streams and seeing different chats take foolish bits seriously

[yellow-the-monster-girl]

whyyyy is no one talking about the replicators???

there's literally so much stuff that I feel like it could be explored, I mean, I don't like fifth that much either but like. the struggle of feeling for the first time. the struggle of feeling differently than your "family" and being seen as weaker for it. the struggle of feeling at all and it still not being enough for the Good Guys to see you as human. the struggle of knowing you're Different. too human for the machines and too machine for the humans. you know???

and repliCarter, no I didn't forget her, like girl has all the memories of regular carter right? imagine there's another you. imagine asking the other you for help even if it's just a ploy to kill fifth and make your bug siblings immune to Destroy Beam and they say if it doesn't work they'll just destroy you. imagine knowing, every second that you stay there, that everyone knows you're not Like Them. you're something Other. like, I'm well aware she's evil and stuff, the point she had to feel something while at the site alpha.

same goes for reese with the horrifying bonus that she basically had the mind of a child. like, imagine those evil dangerous things are your toys. they were supposed to protect you. you never wanted to hurt anyone. imagine you're the Other, you're not human, you're a machine to them, except you're also a child.

and I could go on and on about the asurans and elizabeth weir but that would be a whole another post in itself

tldr: give replicators some love please. and some fanfics. especially the fanfics.

[uefb]

A Wild and Precious Life — Chapters 1 & 2

Summary

In early 2024, Newt Scamander is injured during a conservation project in Burkina Faso. As usual, he gets better, but then… he doesn't. Meanwhile, Tina Goldstein is head of the auror office within the UK’s Department of International Magical Cooperation. Her sister and Jacob have just moved to London; and she and Newt are meant to be married in a matter of weeks. When Newt’s routine checkup suddenly turns concerning, the news comes hurtling at a speed they aren't prepared for... It turns out wizards aren’t impervious to everything; and now Newt and Tina are stuck between a wedding and a timeline that's determined to change their lives.

Opening Scene (Chapter 1)

Newt pounded up the stairs from the basement and screeched to a halt in the kitchen, hiking boots squeaking on the tiles as he dropped his [perfectly unordinary] briefcase onto the floor just a wee bit harder than he’d meant to... His eyes scanned the room for wherever he’d last left the tea kettle and – invariably – his ever-missing, godforsaken phone.

The sound of Tina’s hair-drying charms buzzed from the bathroom as he cast a location spell for both:

A bright ping!! drew him to a stack of papers by the stove (which, shuffling through them, revealed his half-charged phone, already stacked with notification banners…); while a gasping hiss! led him straight to the kettle in the sink, where he’d apparently left it the night before when they’d hurried to the bedroom.

(Monday night had been Tina’s 28th birthday and—after a well-deserved get-together at her favourite restaurant with their her various friends and colleagues… Well… Upon returning home, Tina had simply needed celebrating.)

But now, in the light of day—(as Newt struggled with the inevitably stubborn lid on the top of the kettle)—he caught sight of a pale gold band beside a maroon-stained pair of wine glasses, the ring’s warmth contrasting subtly with the brush-stained silver of their kitchen sink...

He gave up on the kettle and charmed it open instead, shouting over his shoulder (always a battle over Tina’s clatter in the bathroom — gentle mornings were not her forté):

“Tina love!”

But he paused then, swearing under his breath, for he’d enchanted the water in the kettle to boil before even thinking of setting it on a trivet, and thus his hand—

“You’ve left your ring by the sink again!”

He shook out his burnt fingers with a huff, pulling a battered green travel mug (Central African Conservation Conference - 2018) from a cabinet just as the drawer in the bathroom finally slammed shut—

“I keep telling you…” he muttered absently, and Tina’s routine morning noises suddenly died out. “It’ll get knocked into the drain. Or Teddy’ll run off with it. And I haven’t got another royalty check until after the wedding, so if you could –”

But he stopped mid-sentence then, for Tina was suddenly beside him with an abrupt and unexpected tenderness, slipping the citrine ring back onto her finger and pressing a firm kiss to his cheek. She dropped a fragrant Earl Grey tea bag into his mug before nudging it toward him and suggesting firmly, crossing her arms–

“Add honey to that, Newt. Your cough sounded terrible this morning.”

Newt flicked his eyes up to her at that, summoning the honey with an acquiescent but mildly amused grimace. “It did, didn’t it?”

For good measure, he squeezed a half lemon into his travel mug with a half-smile (the tagline ‘I survived erumpent mating season!!’ still made him laugh, even six years later); and Tina moved a step closer to brush a lock of unruly hair from his brow.

“And ask about it at the healers, won’t you?” she prompted. “ When you go in for your check-up? At your final examination this afternoon.”

“Oh - um - right… ”

He most definitely hadn’t forgotten about his second [three-month] follow-up for his January runespoor bite. (There was a reason Tina had merged their calendars the moment they moved in together the year before, and it certainly wasn’t because Newt was the superior timekeeper...)

“It’s been two weeks and the pepper-up’s not working,” Tina continued from where she’d crouched in front of the refrigerator, eventually selecting a Pyrex dish of leftovers to shove into her bag. “Maybe you picked somethin’ up in Spain last month?”

“Ah - no - I couldn’t have,” he murmured, flicking his wand to imbue Hello Newt!!! St. Mungo’s! 12.20! on his hand with waterproof ink and a buzzing reminder spell so he wouldn’t forget. “I mean, apart from pox, humans can’t catch things from dragons, can they? Their diseases simply aren’t zoonotic. And none of the ones I was working with were even sick. Breeding consult, you see,” he clarified.

“Fine, Mr. Scamander,” Tina harrumphed goodnaturedly, and then she was back at the counter, reheating coffee to pour into her own simple travel mug. “But – honey – coughing up a lung under the chuppah wouldn’t be cute, so maybe humour me this time.”

“Well. When you put it that way…” he conceded, returning to the whirlwind of his own morning preparations to get out the door. “Yes, I’ll ask. Of course.”

He had just finished attaching a leather strap to his briefcase to make travelling easier when he suddenly – (actually) – caught his fiancee’s eye, fully registering her striking comportment and demeanour for the first time that morning.

He immediately paused (frozen), for Tina stood particularly straight-backed, in an uncharacteristically well-polished outfit, having apparently swapped her casual slacks and button-ups for a fitted maroon pantsuit, a crisp white dress shirt, and a pair of no-nonsense (but brightly shined) chunky black oxfords.

She raised her eyebrows as Newt continued to stare at her. “Yes, Newt?”

“You - “ He paused to swallow. “You just look very nice today, Tina…”

A beat.

“Thank you.” She smiled and blushed, adjusting the lapel of her cropped suit jacket before taking a step closer to smooth out a wrinkle on Newt’s—conversely—well-loved summer cardigan.

In return, he ran a gentle thumb over a spot on her neck, dissolving the light love bruise back into the creamy tone of her skin with a subtly murmured wandless spell.

“I’ve got planning for that international summit—the one in Vienna—this morning,” she explained with a slight frown. “And then meetings with the French consulate all afternoon.” A huff. “Like, all afternoon, Newt… It’s a pain! But Queenie insists I’ll be taken more seriously if I look my best, so—”

She gestured at her outfit –

“Here we are, I guess.”

Newt tilted his head with a frown, rocking on his heels before patting down his pockets to check for keys, notebook, phone.

“You ought to be taken seriously because you’re the best international auror they’ve got,” he argued haltingly, shoving his wand up his sleeve. “Not just because you dress better than them.”

She guffawed and patted him on the back (in such a way that he would have been offended if it were anyone else), flicking her wand to turn the lights off.

“It might be 2024, Newt, but I’m still a witch under the age of thirty in international magical relations.”

And then they both wove through the slightly cluttered front room of their flat (currently littered with various wedding paraphernalia) toward the door, travel mugs clutched tightly in hand, as she concluded:

“It’s not exactly a walk in the park.”

“Yeah, yes, that’s true,” he acknowledged, when they paused on the stoop. Tina fumbled for her keys and then cast a subtle protective ward on the door behind them. “S’not exactly a walk in the park as an autistic scientist either, I suppose.”

“No, it’s not,” she laughed, and then he leaned in—accidentally bumping their mugs together—to press one hand to the side of her face and soundly kiss her.

“And that,” she murmured against his lips, as they pulled slightly apart, “is precisely why we work…”

Newt smiled, and then shoved Pickett back down into his cardigan pocket when he began to peek out.

“But please don’t lose track of time in the highlands and miss your appointment again!” Tina suddenly pleaded. “I just want everything cleared before the wedding, before our honeymoon…”

“Look,” he countered flatly, “I won’t forget as long as you don’t forget the takeaway.”

“Deal. Thai. 6PM,” she agreed, taking a step further away from him and then looking both ways to check for any particularly attentive Muggles… (They’d at least long ago charmed the front of the flat to be resistant to technological recording devices.) “All clear then.”

A beat.

“Be safe, Newt!” she insisted with finality, and he rolled his eyes.

They squeezed one another’s hands one last time before dropping them into pockets and – on the count of three – they each disapparated to their respective jobs: one to a stuffy conference room in the Department for International Magical Cooperation, and the other one to a crevasse on the highest mountain in the United Kingdom.