#so we simply gotta do things old fashioned. my goofy postings

[xxplastic-cubexx]

if i had a nickel every time magneto, charles, and amelia were all featured on a cover that framed them as having a wack love triangle then im sure im missing more than just these two but im still baffled i naturally found two so easily anyway

[beermanoftana]

gee, thanks, karen [peter parker]

a repost, originally posted in my former writing blog

relationship: peter parker x stark!reader

warnings: swearing, none; mistakes here or there

request (anon): hello!! how about hoco stark!reader x peter where he goes to her lab and asks for her help to fix the suit bc karen isn’t working well lately and while they low key flirt and fix the suit, she puts on the mask to check everything and karen starts telling her how much peter likes her, and she dies inside bc she likes him too and they kiss? maybe ending with irondad or bucky interrupting and they are like :o

notes:   i was going to use the other character in the end but i realized continuity wouldn’t make sense but then i was like fuck that, but I finished it already anyways…second out of the two peter parker x reader fics, it’ll be awhile before i agree to make them again

summary: karen’s broken and peter asks y/n stark for help

You were quietly working in your lab, humming every now and then to a tune that would pop into your head every so and so.

You thanked your father for giving you your own lab in the Avengers compound. There were cameras everywhere on your floor and you knew that he would be watching your every move when he could. Sometimes, you would wave at one camera when you knew he was in the control room. It would never fail to make you giggle, and Tony would always comment that you are such a silly little girl for laughing at your own antics.

Sometimes, some of the team members would come over and ask for your help if Tony was busy. Or they were too lazy to think of solutions on their own. But hey, who’s complaining about helping them?

They would need help with their gadgets, sometimes for work or fighting, most of the time for their everyday use, like their cellphones and laptops, tablets and watches. You don’t mind. In fact, you enjoy it. It makes you feel useful in this compound filled with superheroes.

Your favorite to help out was Peter Parker. He was also a genius with technology, but sometimes he needed a hand with his suit and weapons. You loved helping him out with his webshooters since there were so many possibilities for it. You were even the one who helped your father create his current suit with the Karen interface.

And although Peter turned down the calling of being an Avenger, he would still come over from time to time, and you noticed it’s mostly just to talk to you.

That thought made you smile. You stuck out your tongue and giggled a little in giddiness.

You continued to type in some data in the paper you were writing on. As much as you loved the technology of your father, you still loved the old fashioned pen and paper. It was easier to overlay if needed. You wanted to see all the possible choices before you typed it in the database.

But you thought of Peter again and that tickled your body. “Oh, come on. He isn’t over Liz Allan yet, you silly. He’s still hungover, he can’t be into me that quick. Can he?” But you shake your head.

You’re pretty good at telling if someone liked someone, except of course, when it came to you. But you pretend you do anyway. You have yet to be proven wrong. You smile and nod your head slowly, twirling the pen in your hand with your fingers. “Looks like you’ve got your groove on, y/n Stark.”

“What was that?”

You turned around, surprised to see your father standing behind you. A device in hand and a hologram sticking out. “Hi, Dad.”

“You’ve got your what on, y/n?”

You giggled nervously. “Nothing. It’s nothing, Dad. I was just talking to myself.”

“No, I wanna hear what you said. You’ve got your what on, y/n Stark?”

You sighed in defeat. “My groove,” you said softly.

“I can’t hear you.”

“My groove,” you repeated louder.

“Your groove, huh?” Tony nodded his head. “Well, you know what you should have, y/n? Your homework.”

“Dad,” you whined. “I’ll do that later. I’m in the middle of a discovery here.”

“Oh really? What is it? The end of homework.”

You raised your pen in the air. “That will be my project!”

Tony rolled his eyes. “Okay, whatever. Just hurry so you can finish your homework. It’s a school day tomorrow, y/n. Remember that.”

You smiled sweetly. “Yes, Daddy.”

Tony left the room, leaving you alone.

You turned back to your paper and grit your teeth. So you lied about making a discovery. You were simply testing out some different designs for a suit you wanted to wear. It was very similar to the technology of your father’s but it had no name yet, you didn’t know what to call it, not even a working name.

You sit on the stool and tap the pen on the paper. “If I do this…then this happens, which, of course, I can’t let that happen. So I have to do this…but I have yet to figure out how this one works for it to be able to do that.” You sighed in frustration. “Okay, but if this does happen, which leads to this, then perhaps, just perhaps, it will reach my goal.”

You spin the chair around a few times until you get dizzy. “But we can’t say anything precise with just ‘perhaps’ can we? Oh, y/n, you gotta try a bit harder if you wanna reach the Tony Stark level.”

Finally, after about an hour, you decided that you’ve had enough. You shut down your lab and head to your room to do some homework. “See you tomorrow,” you said with a yawn. “To new discoveries!” You raise your balled fist in the air.

You’re in the middle of a math problem when someone knocks on your door. You groan, you like math and you were getting the answer to this certain number.

“Come in!” you called out, not bothering to look at the door. It was probably just your dad and you wanted him to see you concentrating.

“Hey, y/n.”

You looked up at the young voice. It was Peter Parker and he was holding his Spider-man mask in his hand. “Oh, Peter. I wasn’t expecting you.”

“When am I ever expected?” he snickered.

You smiled and laughed a little. “True.”

“Am I disturbing you?” he asked. He gestured toward your table and smiled. “You look like you’re doing some homework.”

“It’s no problem,” you said with a shrug. “It’s just math.”

“Which you absolutely love,” he responded with a cheery tone. He knew that was something you two had in common. “You hate it when you’re being interrupted when you do your math problems.”

You squint one eye. “That is true, too.” You looked at him for awhile before he raised his eyebrows. “Will you just let me finish this one math problem. I’m almost done, I swear. I just need a few digits to write. Sit.”

He laughed and nodded as he sat on the other chair. “There’s no need to explain, y/n. I’m the intruder and I interrupted you during your favorite subject. Go on, go on. Take as much time as you need.”

You smiled and half-jokingly said, “You say that and I’ll finish the whole homework.” Then you continued answering the number. After you’ve secretly finished answering one more number, you turned back to him and grinned. “Done! Now what did you want to talk about?”

“There’s something wrong with Karen,” he replied, holding up his mask.

“Oh no!” You exclaim, standing up and grabbing his mask. “Not Karen! What did you do, Peter Parker?”

He laughed nervously. “I may have fallen flat on my face.”

You looked at him immediately. Now that he mentioned it, his nose was a bit broken and he had a cut on his lip and some scratches along his face. “Are you okay?” you ask, although you know that it’s too late to ask that now. “Have you gone to the clinic?”

“I can’t go to my school’s infirmary or the hospital and mobile clinics,” he chuckled, “without being asked what had happened.”

“Why don’t you go to the one downstairs?”

He shrugged. “Can we fix Karen first?”

You sighed. “Okay, sure. Come on.”

The two of you left your room and walked over to your lab.

You tinker with the technology your father put in but you also recognize some of the pieces you’ve planted in the interface.

Peter did everything he could to help, in fact, there were moments wherein his mind thought of the better solutions. You weren’t undermining his brains, no, of course not, but you were also thinking of your own pride, you did put some of the tidbits that was the reason as to why Karen had come to life.

“You’re really good at this,” Peter said.

“Only because I want to impress you,” you replied. “You’re not so bad yourself, Mr. Parker.”

“Only because a pretty girl is with me.”

You look at him with a smirk playing in your lips. “So how’s Liz Allan holding up?”

He shrugged. “I don’t know. I think she hates me.”

“I would hate you, too. You know, if you told me you needed a rain check for our homecoming date when we’re in the homecoming dance.”

“Aw come on, I’d never do that to you, y/n. I like you.”

You laughed. “And I like you, too.” You shake your head. “Go to the clinic, Mr. Parker. We’re almost done with Karen.”

He sighed and patted his mask. “See you, girl.”

You snickered.

After a few minutes, you think Karen is doing okay. So you do the thing everyone would do to test it out, you wear the mask.

“Hello, y/n.”

“Oh, hello, Karen. I didn’t know you still remembered me.”

“I will always remember you, y/n. Peter thinks very highly of you.”

“He does?” you gasped.

“Yes. He would constantly talk about you, asking me if you’re okay. I would watch him talking to himself in the mirror, practicing how to ask you out. He likes you very much, y/n. And based on your facial reaction and heatwave, I can tell you like him, too.”

“Y/n!”

You unmasked yourself and see Peter with a red face. “I can explain,” you both said at the same time. “I like you!” Again, in unison.

Peter rushed towards you to give you a kiss. “I know Karen said I’ve been practicing,” he said against your lips, “please don’t watch those. Those are really embarrassing.”

“Your nose is still broken,” is all you can say, murmuring.

“I’ll go later,” he said.

You giggle. “There are cameras, we’ll get cau–”

“What is going on here?” Tony’s voice boomed.

“Oops,” you both say, a goofy smile on your faces.

[phantomphangphucker]

A King For Tonight’s Fentertainment - Chap. 4: With Fashion He Shows His Passion

Summary:  Danny's shown them part of who he is, he's told them part of who he is, his Knight is practically shouting it at them. So why's it so hard for them to believe that he's a king and that he cares?

Danny nods and jumps away, cape slashing through the air dramatically, from the group of humans some. Quickly being followed by the Fright Knight, who also flares his cape dramatically, before standing to the side and behind Danny; Nightmare coming up behind the Fright Knight. Danny turns to face the group of humans, with a shit-eating grin, “yeah I’m the damn Ghost King. Which, since I still think you’re missing this, means king of ghosts”.

Dash can’t help but snap, staring at the weird-ass kid legit looking like a king with his knight flanking him, “well no shit Fentuns 'o fun, still don’t buy you being any kind of king. Or having any kind of authority over any kingdom”.

Red adds in, “especially a ghost one”.

Danny tilts his head to the side and groans, muttering to himself, “fucking humans. For Phantom's sake”.

“You know sire, most kings don’t use their own name as a swear”, Danny just snorts and chuckles at the Fright Knights comment. Danny looks back to the humans and shakes his head as the Fright Knight addresses them, “you misunderstand his highness. It goes back to what the young king said previously. “the” And “a” do not carry the same gravity or prestige”.

Dash mutters, “the fuck does that mean”.

While Danny nods, speaking again, “I am The Ghost King, not just a ghost king”. Danny stretches his arms over his head and clasps his hands behind his head, making the cape bunch up around his neck, the flames curling together and blazing erratically. Danny smirks, “A king means someone who rules a kingdom. A community, selection, bunch, collection of people or species. The king means someone who rules the entirety of a species”.

Nightmare stomps a hoof on the ground and snorts. While the Fright Knight nods, speaking, “in layman’s terms, ghost ruling titles are based on where they rule. A ghost queen of the Terabina kingdom would be called the Terabina Queen. His majesty’s title is The Ghost King, because his kingdom encompasses the whole of the Ghost Realm. Simply stated, he rules all ghosts and every single existing ghost bends to his command”. Danny nods and gives a goofy smile, aiming to soften the blow and not have his humans blow up at him.

Unsurprisingly, one of the agents is the first to speak up. Agent G snaps, swinging an arm around wildly, “but he’s a human! A child human at that! A, clearly, horribly ghostly indoctrinated one but all the same!”.

“That matters not, it was his by right. He simply had to claim it”, the Fright Knight turns to Danny, “even if it took many moons for his highness to claim his throne”. The Fright Knight flicks his gaze back to the agent and bellows, “AND TAINTED HIS MIND IS NOT. HE IS SIMPLY FREE FROM FAULTY UNDERSTANDINGS OF EITHER OF THE TWO GREAT REALMS. SOMETHING THAT THE LIKES OF YOU HAVE CLEARLY NOT BEEN GRACED WITH SO”.

Danny shrugs, cape bunching up around his neck again, “what he said, and ask anyone, teens don’t exactly jump at the chance for responsibilities ...or life complications, for that matter”, smirking, “but all the same, it’s my place and a grand one it is. I’d take no other in my place”.

Fright Knight nods strongly, “nor would I. You are plenty fair and are one of few humans lacking biases. Regardless of your blood, you regard your subjects with affections and true thought”.

Danny can’t help but blush at the praise, “it’s what’s right, nothing more. Who I am has never been one to hate unjustly or universally”.

“You are far too humble, your highness. You care, and that’s more than the kings of old”. Danny kind of hates how true the Fright Knights statement is, most ghost kings were less than kind or good.

Maddie jumps in, “our boy is just protecting his town and the people here! He is not doing anything for you filthy creatures!”.

Both Danny and the Fright Knight shake their heads, but Danny does so with a sigh; grumbling all the while, “this is just fucking dandy, perfectly peachy. Ancients end me”, before turning his head to look directly at Maddie, “you’re wrong, mom”.

Maddie stares at him before shaking her head, choosing to ignore her son in favour of insulting and chewing out the, adult, ghost, “and how dare you lay claim to my son! By placing some ghost title on him and binding him to your emotionless dimension!”. Danny tilts his head back, “it’s more of a Zone and it’s called a Realm...officially anyway”. Danny’s not even sure she heard him as Maddie just continues ranting.

Danny gets an unpleasant reminder of the GIW presence when agent L snaps, “you freaks must be using the boy for access to our world!”.

The Fright Knight scoffs, “hardly, we need no human for access to your living Human Realm”, turning to Maddie as Nightmare, much to Danny’s amusement, kicks agent L, “he was neither binded nor demanded his royal grandeur. As I have already made apparent, his lordship claimed his title. There was no force of hand and none would dare partake in such actions when dealing with anyone of whom hand and head be worthy of the Ghost Realms infinite depths of power”.

Red shakes her head and pointedly avoids the Fright Knight as she moves to stand next to Danny. Danny watches as she rubs a bit of the cape in her fingers, clearly avoiding the flames though. Red looks up from the cape to Danny’s watchful face, while he smiles softly at her, “batshit crazy huh?”. Red squints at him, “that’s an understatement Danny. What the fuck? How can a human? How do you have this? This claim or whatever?”.

Dash storms up a bit, “better question Fen-tertainment Tonight, if you’re this damn big shot Ghost King then why the hell don’t you just order all these ghosts to fuck off?”. Dash’s question causes both agents and Maddie to stop their verbal tirades, looking to Danny.

Maddie scrunching up her eyebrows some before nodding at Danny, “yes, yes you should be able to do that. It still makes no sense and no filthy dimension of post-human consciousness should be infesting my boy with its ectofilth. But you, you could use this couldn’t you?”.

Danny rubs his neck awkwardly, “seriously, just say Zone or Realm”, before putting his hands up, motioning for them to quiet down. Sighing, “can and will aren’t the same. Could and should. Not gonna do that. By ‘that’ I mean the whole telling the ghosties to fuck off. It’s not my fault if Dashie can’t handle his days being made a bit spooktacular. That’s whatcha get for living in a partly unliving town. A town full of a fantasma of ectoplasma”, Danny internally groans at the slight glare from Maddie. Tilting his head back and groaning exaggeratedly, “mom, sure the ghosties make living here, interesting, but it’s hardly some immediate issue. Plus, it’s part of Amity’s charm”, Danny jabs a finger at the two agents, “if anything, the colour white makes for a hell of a lot more black and blue. Because they’re twats. Ghost hating, uninformed, backwards, unworldly, benighted, white suit scum. I may be in league with the dead, but those fucksticks are dead from the neck up”.

Danny talks to Red right over the GIW agents grumblings, “and the fuck is right. Quite the thing to be walking along, doin my own freak shit”, glancing at Dash, “I’ll take freaks over teddy bears any day”. Looking back to Red, “then what do I hear? What caresses and tickles my ears? Ghostly asses muttering about my kingliness”, tapping his chin, “well princeliness at the time”, shrugging, “that shit threw me through a loop more blazingly hard to fathom than my crown that alights my head with its flames”.

“Wait, you mean you weren’t even told? You just...overheard shit? And then decided, fuck it, and just went all Ghost King?”, Red’s jaw drops as Danny nods. While agent L snaps, “no human should be a ghost prince or king! You must be infected by some ghostly thing! You-”.

Danny cuts the guy off by snapping, “y’all are just pissy I’m all enlightened and shit. That I know and have access to what you don’t. That, when it comes to ghosts, I have real sway and say. That I can make real plays and forays. That I have the ability to easily slay and flay ghostly ass”.

Mr. Lancer mutters, “why does he not show this kind of rhyming and wordplay in class?”. Danny, having easily heard him, “cause it’s not funny using it in class. Right now, it’s fucking hilarious”. Danny points at the fuming agents, “anything that pisses them off is side-splitting”. While Red pokes at him, shaking her head, “how does a human even claim a ghost throne?!? How does one even be able to be able to claim it?”.

“Uh, ask nicely?”, Danny shrugs, “but really, sit on the throne you have claim over. Bare the weight of your crown and open yourself up to the power it all grants you”. Danny lifts up his hand and flicks the Ring of Suffering, “in The Ghost King case, wield the pain and embodiment, or whatever, of your life’s defining unpleasant shit. A defining feature of your life that you do or gotta overcome, but will always be a thing in whatever bullshit existence you happen to have”.

Maddie stutters, “p-pain? Unpleasant? Danny, what do you mean? This hurts you?”, Maddie shakes her head, “that doesn’t even explain how you have a claim, ghost prince? How? Why? The living shouldn’t have such a title”.

Nightmare snorts, leaning their head almost protectively overtop of Danny’s. While the Fright Knight claps Danny on the shoulder, “might is a burden, and his grace’s might is grandiose. Any title of the royals is one carrying might, and power granted always has its draws”.

Danny nods and points at his ring, “represents a large aspect of my existence that I must be better than. Deal with like a colossal champ. Overwhelmingly overcome. Be a spectral survivor of whatever bullshit. Sooo. Unpleasant, displeasing, irksome, troublesome, annoying; kinda all part of the duty. This is the Ring of Suffering after all. Kinda means I suffer a lot in my existence and will continue to”. Multiple people instantly turn to glare at Dash, and Danny’s not about to correct the aim of their blame.

“You bare it grandly, as is expected from one of such excellency. Pariah’s ill-handling of his rage only exemplifies your true right to rule”, the Fright Knight turns to Red, “his great lordship was the one in line to take the crown. Such was he at the fall of the ensnared mad king. One of whom even thousand years of cursed sleep could not make capable of quelling his unpleasantry that was his rage and wrath. The battered deranged one held his place as The Ghost King no more. So as such, the right to rule was granted true to a young merciful one. His state of living being inconsequential. His splendours grant him worthy of his dignitaries, for he is a luminary one”. Danny mutters, “you are way too much of a knight. Are you trying to bury me in wordy praises?”.

Red smirks, a bit uncomfortably, at Danny, “this is starting to sound like a religion”. Danny chuckles, “he likes embellishing his words. Pretty sure it makes him feel all high and mighty or some shit”.

“One of my standing should sound as such”, the Fright Knight nods curtly to emphasise his statement. Earning a smirk from Danny, “oh? And what of the one above you, my frightful knight?”. Red can’t help but snort as the Fright Knight stiffens some, “you, my liege, by you’re reverence alone make any words spoken suiting”.

Danny laughs, patting the Fright Knight on the back almost aggressively, “nice save, Frightmare”. Danny grumbles to himself, “now to save all these idiots...and two extra idiots who need to be drowned in pomegranate juice, red wine, blood, and tomato sauce”.

While Red grimaces, “that would smell awful”.

Danny glances around, catching Dash pretty well tearing his hair out over Danny being royalty. GIW throwing insults at ghosts but mostly at Danny, with Maddie snapping back at them with almost concerning levels of aggression. Mr. Lancer and a few other teachers look like they’re gonna cry from the lack of order. Danny turns his head skyward, grumbling, “I really should get everyone out of here before something stupid happens. Which I’m sure it will anyway”.

“Well that’s pessimistic”, Red shoves him before muttering near his ear, cringing a little as his capes collars cold flames dance over her shoulder slightly, “the only reason I’m not de-suiting is your mom, you know. Well, that and everyone’s attention on you is saving me from twenty-one questions”.

Danny makes a pouty face, grumbling, “glad my suffering could be helpful...but you know what you could do in return?”. Red instantly frowns, slightly nervous about what the strange highly unpredictable, and apparently royal, boy might request. Danny smirks as he continues, “you cool your shit. Chill out with the ghost hating. Put the biases on ice. At least give the ones who ain’t causing a problem the cold shoulder instead of going all blazing fire and fury on ‘em. I don’t expect you to not be frosty to the ghosties through”. Danny runs a hand through the flames, patting at them before looking back to Red, a bit bashfully. Flicking his eyes upward, “they are my subjects after all. Kinda hard for me to not find the whole, mass ghost hating and destroy everything ectoplasmic, mind set...you know, bad. As much as my aliveness might still be a thing, and my unlivedness”, chuckling, “I mean, inexperience, as a king might be a thing. You being all Miss destructo murdersuit, isn’t really over lookable if something funky happened. Monkeys or no monkeys”.

“That...that was a really weird way to ask me to play nice, well nicer. And monkeys?”, Red shakes her head, “I mean I guess”, Red chuckles and punches Danny’s shoulder playfully, “you have to treat them all kind and shit, so if Mr. Ran away from all ghosts, can tolerate the non-aggressors I can too”.

Danny smirks as he swirls his fingers in the air, making a portal and pulling through an apple. Taking a bite of it before speaking, “funky alone is just weird, but funky monkey is just plain crazy”, swallowing harshly, “and I’d like to think so. Not every hunter here has drowned their clothing in enough bleach to fry all their brain cells, after all. But I don’t have to be kind and I don’t simply tolerate”, shrugging, “okay, some I do just tolerate”, pointing the apple at Red, “I care for, have fondness for, enjoy the company of, find plenty of merriment with, ghosts. My kingdom, dominion or whatever, the Ghost Zone, Ghost Realm. I do care. I do protect it, them; this big clusterfuck that makes for a dead species and world”.

Danny pulls a second apple through the portal before closing it. Whipping the apple at agent G without breaking eye contact with Red, “and the GIW have long made themselves an enemy, trying to blow the whole place up isn’t really something friendly”. Danny smiles while Red gapes at him, “rather not have you as an enemy as well”. Danny mutters under his breath, “or my parents for that matter, but I somehow doubt they’ll really listen to me. I’m just a teen and their kid after all”. Danny knows full well they’ll probably order him to cut it the fuck out. But he won’t, obviously. Danny smirks again, holding up the first, and now half-eaten, apple, “this is a red delicious by the way”. Earning a slug in the shoulder from Red.

The two laugh a bit before both realise they’re being stared at, by pretty well all the humans. Danny sighs, “oh now what? I guess it was high time someone took a piss on my semi pleasant day”.

The Fright Knight leans over, “they’ve been watchful ever since you ever so casually created a small portal, for something so mundane as sustenance”. The Fright Knight isn’t about to add on that his highness clearly did so purely for some jokes, his majesty was a jester of a king after all.

Danny chuckles, “heh”, shrugging, “we really should, you know, go”. With a huff, Danny flops down to sit cross-legged. Hiding his smirk with a hand as multiple people look up and nod, many gulping nervously. But Danny glares at the GIW agents as they look to each other and nod, obviously forming some kind of plan. And their plans were always stupid or just unpleasant. Danny squints at them, annoyed, as they address him, “you’ll be coming with us. Far too ghostly to be allowed uncontained”.

Danny snorts, “no I will not. Go ahead and try though. You couldn’t catch this eldritch ass even if I didn’t fight back or summon my army to brutalise your asses”. Danny points lazily at the men, “I have a good four million super-powered dead fucks at my becking call, or whatever. And that’s just my army, many of my allies have armies of their own. You’d have better chances of catching the swine flu, the Black Plague, and rabies all at once than capturing or arresting me”.

The Fright Knight nods and steps forward, bellowing, “YOU WILL MAKE NO SUCH ACTIONS AGAINST HIS ROYAL PROVIDENCE. SHOULD YOU DISOBEY, IN THE PLACE OF WHICH HIS MAJESTY IS SOVEREIGN, I SHALL TAKE GREAT PLEASURE IN STRIKING FEAR INTO YOUR BEINGS. THE HIGH GHOST KING AS HE MAY BE, IS BEYOND YOUR MORTAL LAWS. YOU AND YOUR KINDS RULE HAVE NO CLAIMS TO HIS HIGHNESS”. The Fright Knight flies quickly to bring his blade directly to the necks of the men, making both shriek, “I suggest that once my liege, in all his merciful splendour, returns you to your realm. That you take your leave and BE GONE”.

Danny gets back up, watching in case things go to grade A shit. While the Fright Knight steps back, sensing the warning in his kings' posture. Only for Maddie to storm over, “I can defend my son perfectly well and better than you, ghost”. Maddie turns on the, still startled, agents, “you dare, DARE, lay a hand on my boy and I will dump so much red wine all over every inch of you that everything white that ever touches you again will instantly be stained pink! Then I will chase you publicly with the Fenton creep stick until you run off to suck your mommies thumbs!”.

The Fright Knight looks back to Danny, pointing at Maddie, “I find myself of like mind with her”. Danny chuckles, relaxing, “so you’re kindred spirits in the name of my defence”. Maddie glares distrustfully at the Fright Knight before returning to giving death glares at the agents.

Agent G snaps, somewhat nervously, “human, underaged and your son regardless; he’s an ectothreat! This can not be allow-”. He gets cut off by loud banging and explosions out in the distance of the vast of the Ghost Zone. While Danny mutters, “no shit I’mma ectothreat, I literally just said that. Like really, kinda obvious at this point. Shit don’t fucking matter though”.

The Fright Knight only looks towards the sounds for a second before walking next to Danny, “that’s right sire, I originally sought you out to inform you of the return to warring between the Xercti nation and Herencotton clans. However, I do find it is highly improbable that this skirmish could become any form of all-encompassing or eradicating in nature. All the same, word of the Far Frozen becoming skittish of their lands being encroached upon isn’t in short supply”.

Danny nods strongly, tapping his chin, “put in a request for ColdStep to move the Frost Blazes land warning marker, to be placed a half moons flight away from the Wrought Crystal Silk Road’s entrance and to the left of the Levina Whistler. As well as placing a watchers talisman on the marker yourself”, Danny snaps his fingers, “oh, and I’ll go light the Defted Lands on fire in a couple days. That ought to avoid them straying their cannon fire too far towards Silfee territory”.

The Fright Knight kneels, bowing deeply, “as you request, my king”, standing back up before bowing again, “you endeavourings fit the flavours of belittlement, brazen comedy and wild absurdity; like always”. Danny chuckles, “yup, and ain’t the Defted lands gonna be ripened to vapour wines shortly. Funny thing that’ll be, anyone still fighting will suddenly find themselves far too drunk to aim”.

The Fright Knight barks a laugh, “most assuredly”. The Fright Knight turns back to face the two agents, “and you, living mortals, regardless of where my presence be, or the presence of my eminence. You shall be cut down for your desired disgracing actions, should you act on them. And, for your given contempt towards the great highness, you will be allotted no mercy should such events come to fruition”.

The Fright Knight only chooses to dignify them with the sight of his glaring for a little longer before returning his attention to his majesty. Swiftly hopping onto Nightmare’s back, “at your graces call I shall always be, my servitude is granted yours keep. Frosted death keep thee and, for thy alone, life’s bite keep thee marked. Till many moons and under you high king sway, High Ghost King”.

Danny tilts his head down slightly, “blazing death keep thee and life’s bite never mark thee. Till lesser moons and under thine oath, High Dread Knight Fright Knight, High Steed Nightmare”.

[theoutsanityshoppe]

Hnnngg KH3.

Note: This is my using Tumblr as a place to scream into the void my thoughts. I’m not looking for responses - or for anyone to try and change my mind, so please don’t bother. I’ve been playing these games since I was 8 years old when they first came out. 

Since I’m gonna be talking about the entire game, I’m gonna slap this on:

So all morning I’ve been highly annoyed and frustrated but unsure why until I let my thoughts just go on their own and I realized I’m just super huffy and upset about KH3 as I finished the game yesterday.

I’m writing this more entirely to get my thoughts/feelings down and maybe move the fuck on from them and not at all to influence peoples opinions on the game. 

But pretty much from the second I entered the Kingdom of Corona I was complaining throughout the entire game. That kingdom in particular pissed me off the most what with it beING THE GODDAMN MOVIE SCENE BUT FUCKING SCENE LINE BY FUCKING LINE and bored me almost to literal tears. I was infinitely more excited [and enjoyed it more!] to play Arendelle than I was Corona, and I can’t stand Frozen but love Tangled as films. 

I know Nomura has never been the best at linear, or hell for that matter, simple story lines but I felt that KH 3 was a mockery of what it could have been. It feels like it, and at the same time us, the fans, were shoved into the corner while other projects were worked on instead and only just finished because “well shit it’s been so long we gotta get something out there”.

The story line was the single shortest and most disappointing out of all of the games - and I have played every goddamn one of them [tho not very far into DreamDrop, the fact that you could drop mid-boss battle infuriated me to no end and I gave up on that game entirely after I had a single hit to go on a fourth attempt on Riku’s boss at Notre Dame]. They focused way too hard on the visual aspects of the game - the scenery, the characters [except, apparently, their hair as Rapunzel's hair made me cringe every goddamn time she showed up] the battle affects, the magic... all the most stunningly beautiful things I have ever seen. The vastly open worlds were amazing too - omaigod it was crazy just exploring every nook and cranny.

But the worlds were utterly pointless. There was no princess to save. No keyhole to lock. No Maleficent to stop. No Pete to beat up. No real REASON for the Heartless to even BE at the worlds and even less for Sora to be there! The only one that made any sense for why baddies were there was just Monstropolis cuz Vanita’s was there, thus, so were the Unversed. [Which was fun except it had already been spoiled that he was gonna show up there so good on your advertising team Square Enix /sarcasm.]. It was just Sora running around seemingly forgetting constantly that there is a HUGE ASS WAR coming literally around the corner. But naw, let’s just have him run around being a pirate during the middle of an incredibly jumpy PoC#3 film recreation. You really demanding we know these films forwards and backwards to enjoy the game??? Fuck that. [Also, I see they tried hard, but the faces on literally everyone in PoC scared the crap out of me. They showed too much teeth and despite trying to show enough human emotion still felt robotic and creepy. Sora, Donald and Goofy were freaking adorable tho.]

The only worlds I thoroughly enjoyed were Toy Box [cuz, gasp! It didn’t just follow the fucking movie line by line!! It was actually new and original but felt like it could be a Toy Story...story!!!] and San Fransokyo cuz I’ve never seen Big Hero Six. I purposefully didn’t watch it because I didn’t want to be bored to tears watching the fucking movie but with Sora, Donald and Goofy thrown in cuz why not. [Side note: Replica Riku and the Cubes showing up was awesome.]

On the topic of worlds: WHERE. THE. FUCK. WAS. RADIANT. GARDEN.

Why in the actual hell was it just a “””””””””””background””’”’’’”””” world???????????? Why was the completed version of Hallow Bastion - a world that has been in just about every goddamn game in some form or fashion minus DreamDrop NOT IN THE “FINAL” GAME [yes I know this is not the end of the series I’m talking about the final for this damn saga]. IT;S A FUCKING IMPORTANT WORLD and all we get is backdrops of it while other characters are there??????? THEY EVEN BROUGHT ANSEM THE GODDAMN WISE BACK AND STILL WE DIDN’T GO THERE. OR EVEN MEET THE BASTARD AGAIN.

There was no purpose for almost all of the old Organization characters to even be in this game, other to be puppets for Xehanort and just pointless background characters.

“But Bri! Vexen helped give Roxas and Namine bodies!” SO. WHAT.

Roxas goddamn did it basically on his own. Despite it being A HUGE plot point that no one has any damn idea how to do this, even Vexen being a bit out of it, Roxas just fucking appears out of the blue having basically put himself together at this point cuz - reminder! SORA NEVER FUCKING WENT TO RADIANT GARDEN AND VEXEN NEVER SAW HIM ONCE. So how the SHIT did Roxas’s heart get inside a vessel???? Even if it was the vessel that they just left on the goddamn floor of the labyrinth and not the one at Radiant Garden THAT MAKES NO SENSE.

Nor their overly drawn out death scenes and the weird ass Grim Reaper heartless. Or that weird “Final World” other than a very obvious way to throw Cirithy int here at the last freaking second. Or that we had to watch the same scene twice only for some new bastard to show up [Lingering Will, and I will admit I was cheering that whole fight cuz hell yes go Terra but still why didn’t he show up in the first place?????? Why did Sora resetting the whole fucking world apparently trigger him coming?????]

AKGJAKJFHGADFG Like I said before I’m only writing this out to air my own frustrations on the game - if you love this game, fantastic, I’m very happy for you -it has plenty of good aspects to it too. I am not trying to change anyone’s opinions on the game.

BUT AUGH. I FEEL SO HORRIBLY CHEATED. I won’t even go into my rant about Kairi - there’s enough text posts out there about how horribly they wrote her. How pathetic.

Xion being there made 0 sense too. I’m happy AF she, Roxas, and Axel got their happy ending but annoyed as hell as to WHEN they got it - but frankly just about everything in the actual story happened during the last goddamn second. 

I get wanting to set up intruge for later games - but this was a) a main title game and b) supposed to be the end of Xehanort’s Saga/Sora’s. WHY. WASN’T. MORE. ANSWERED??????? In my opinion: aboslutely nothing from Union Cross should have been in this. Not a damn thing. That should all be in the past and NO ONE from the current games should be from the keyblade war *coughfuckingVentusLariumandElrenacough*. I’m excited and want to know about that war and everything from the past but I’m sick of them trying so hard to connect it to the current characters - just place is in the goddamn past! Or STOP AGING CHARACTERS - how the fuck is Xehanort and Eraqus so damn old but Ventus, Larxene, Marluxia and Xigbar are apparently 100+ years old but all look like they’re between 16-30 [minus Xig who looks like 50 cuz of the streaks in his hair]. Also that surprise that Xig is Luxu????? Exciting at first cuz I adore him as a character and am happy to see him continue to be a main player but WHAT?????? THE?????? FUCK???????? 0 sense. Makes 0. Goddamn. Sense.

And how ARE the foretellers still alive???? WHY the hell are they still alive??? And why didn’t they fight each other at the end - we watched them try and murder each other in the damn back video!

Again: yeah, ok this is all being set up for a later game to come out in the future. SO DO THAT IN A WAY THAT DOESN’T MAKE THIS ONE FEEL LIKE A THROW AWAY MIDDLE GAME!!! That’s what KH3 feels like - like Chain of Memories or Coded. It took me 35+ hours to get through all of the worlds [and find all of the treasure/lucky emblems] before it ACTUALLY started getting into the real plot of the story aka the real reason I was playing the goddamn game. In the end I finished the game at 43 hours. So. Less than 10 hours of this entire game was dedicated to the fucking plot and the rest was to reenacting Disney film scene by scene line by goddamn line with absolutely no purpose or meaning to anything. 

KH2 is infamous for confusing players cuz no one knew who Roxas was at the beginning but was a fucking masterpiece - it had so much thrown in and yea, a lot of questions left over, but we actually had enough to be satisfied. We had new characters and new villains and enough interactions between them all to get a great feeling about what’s going on. KH3 simply threw together last second answers with next to no explanation other than “that’s just how it is” in order to just move on and that PISSES ME OFF TO NO END. 

KH3 also just felt like a movie - there were so many cutscenes!!! AND DURING BATTLES. SERIOUSLY???? DURING THE FINAL FIGHTS BETWEEN ALL 13 DARKNESSES?????????? 

Also something that I hated and refuse to acknowledge because to me it feels 100% like a Rowling/Snape scenario: Fucking Isa/Saix.

Not once in any game do we get the feeling that Saix is redeemable. Not. fucking. once. [not including BBS in which he was an innocent]. I’m perfectly happy with villains getting them - I love that! BuT WHERE WAS IT???? He was a cruel and sadistic bastard in all the other games he’s in - especially KH2! [and a jerk in 358!] WHERE DID THIS NEW FRIENDSHIP WITH LEA/AXEL COME FROM???????? Give us the goddamn redemption - don’t just have him show up after NEARLY MURDERING THEM AGAIN and be all “and now they are friends. weee” that is bullshit. He deserves NOTHING right now.

Frankly the whole way all of the Organization members who haven’t been given backstories died annoyed me. Larxene’s goddamn secret [why fucking mention it if it’s not gonna be in the damn game???] Luxords weird ass trump card that was useless and we never even saw what it was. Marluxia suddenly “getting memories back” - bitch what memories??? And how almost happily they all went????? What????? Now they’re totally cool with Sora murdering them????

Also Demyx...just Demyx. I love him but he was pointless in this. He did 1 thing. And they didn’t even need him for that. Vexen switching sides also made little sense as again: he had only ever been set up as a villain before. Ok- they SORTA set up a redemption arc for him and Ansem but then promptly dropped it and we never saw either of them again. SAME WITH TWILIGHT TOWN. We went through all that trouble to get the virtual world set up and then???? Never???? Mentioned???? Again???? We didn’t even get to GO to it which is what I was 30000% expecting to happen.

You know what else: where the heck were Leon and the gang. They’ve been a vital part of many KH games - including both main titles. Why weren’t they in this. In fact were ANY Final Fantasy characters even in this??????? Siefer and his change were apparently locked in the sandlot that was completely un-accessible from anywhere in Twilight Town. Cloud didn’t show up and since the Collesium was gone [I was ok with that tho] neither did Sephiroth as a mini boss].

AND

NO

HALLOWEENTOWN

EITHER

Another world that has been in almost every game and is A MASSIVE fan favorite! You were able to come up with a story line for the second game, you could have easily figured one out for this one - hell you didn’t even need Oogie you could have had fucking Vanitas as the baddie here instead of at Monstropolis. 

This entire game felt like a cop-out to just get the story over and done with to move on to other stuff and that infuriates me. I’ve put too many hours and too much of my life into this series to get such a shitty ending to this particular part of the story. Yeah I get that no matter what it would end confusing - Nomura is king at that. I get it: this game is a perfect example as to why you need to know what your ending is to a story before you dive head first in. I don’t think [if I remember correctly] anyone thought the game would go past the first one so there was no reason to add more to it which is fine. Then it went crazy in traditional Nomura fashion lol. Which is fine! But at least have SOME kind of understandable plot!!! I’m still confused as to what exactly was going on - especially since so many characters kept changing their reasoning [YEAH IM LOOKING AT YOU XEHANORT. Not sure I liked his ending either. Yay he’s gone - but really? A happy ending with his best friend WHO HE MURDERED?]

Still don’t know what the hell Kingdom Hearts really is. Or why Sora and co didn’t just use it to try and fix the worlds. Also I feel like it must be hella annoyed at everyone like the Dragon from DBZA lololol like “WHY DO YOU PEOPLE KEEP CREATING ME JUST TO HAVE SOME SNOT NOSED 15 YEAR OLD SLAM THE DOOR IN MY FACE AGAIN???” kinda thing hahahahaha

I think I need to start a second post cuz this one’s getting weird.