#Nugget be normal challenge

[lady-nuggetz]

Smiling so wide rn im so glad everyone liked the doodles I will absolutely try and make more for more ppl during my next lecture....!

Might even redraw some too idk HHEHEHEHEHEH.... LIKE ACTUAL FANART WHO KNOWS I'm sorry I get obsessed with other peoples characters so fucking easily.....

[sunrizef1]

Heart Eyes

Pairing: Carlos Sainz x Reader

Authors note: today i discovered that I can fully just screenshot Instagram posts so that was really helpful 🤦‍♀️ | another quick one | opening my Carlos Sainz list then 🌶️

Warnings: one curse word

Face Claim: Joanna Pincerato

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yourusername

liked by carlossainz and 101,008 others

yourusername ❄️☀️

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user1 omg 🤩

user2 too hot to get cold

user3 my fav

user4 I love her so much

user5 Carlos Sainz in the likes again

user6 someone tell him to shoot his shot lmao

user7 it’s been months 😭

user8 ahhhhh she looks so pretty

user9 🫶

user10 lovely

user11 ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

user12 I need that swimsuit

user13 I could never 🥶

carlossainz 😍

liked by yourusername

user14 omg Carlos finally commented

user15 about time

user16 her hair is so nice

user17 ❄️❄️❄️

user18 y/n just liking Carlos’ comment is so funny to me

user19 prettyyyy

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yourusername added to their story

carlossainz

Beautiful querida 😍

yourusername

Thank you Carlos 🤭 🫶

carlossainz

Of course ángel ❤️

yourusername loved a message

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yourusername

liked by carlossainz and 105,001 others

yourusername museum day 🖼️

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user20 queen

user21 so pretty

user22 my fav

user23 🎨🎨🎨

user24 Carlos back in the likes

user25 lmao my man’s always lurking I can’t

user26 artsy vibes 👩‍🎨

carlossainz you’re the most beautiful art 😍

yourusername ahhh thank you carlito 🫶

user27 CARLOSSSSSS

user28 my man went from heart eye emojis to full sentences, they grow up so fast

user29 oh trust he still included the heart eyes

user28 can’t change him lmao

user30 and she replied!!! 🥹

user31 they’re already so cute I can’t

user32 ❤️❤️❤️

user33 the fit eats

user34 the prettiest painting is you 🫶

user35 Carlos already pulled that one

user35 good try though queen 🫶

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yourusername added to their story

user36

SMOOTH OPERATORRRRR

user37

Carlos????

user38

Is that my bbg Carlos Sainz

user39

HE DID IT

user40

That better be car boy or so help me god

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carlossainz

liked by yourusername charles_leclerc and 2,711,008 others

carlossainz mi sol ☀️😍

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user41 “my sun” 🥹

user42 Carlos don’t simp on main challenge: impossible

user43 IS THAT BBG Y/N!!!!???

user44 y/n? 🥹

user45 I hope that’s y/n

user46 wait yall know who that is???

user47 we think it’s this girl that Carlos has been interacting with for months now

user46 what’s her @

user47 @/yourusername

user46 omg I just checked and this man has been down bad for months hasn’t he?? 😭

user47 he has been 😭

user48 loml

user49 😍🤩

user50 heart eye emojis, my man is consistent fr

user51 stop with the woke soft launch madness

user52 show it to me Rachel

user53 just tag her bro 😩

user54 y/n liked!!! 😍😍😍😍

user55 ☀️☀️☀️

user56 my fav couple

user57 they’ve been together 3 seconds and he hasn’t even confirmed that that’s y/n

user56 idc I feel it in my nuggets

user58 BAE 🤭

user59 @/yourusername is this u queen???

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yourusername added to their story

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yourusername

liked by carlossainz landonorris and 420,690 others

yourusername my boy ❤️

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user60 Carlos crumbs

user61 I’m sure everyone will be completely normal and calm about this

user62 CARLOSSSSSSSSS 🏎️🏎️🏎️🏎️

user63 YEAHHH CARLITO

user64 that’s the smooth operator I know it is

user65 my down bad king Carlos Sainz

user66 LANDO LIKEDDDD

user67 that’s how we know it’s real, he’s involved his friends 🤭

user68 idc that buff ass arm is car number 55

user69 do we know that’s Carlos???

user70 it has to be

user71 if its not I might jump off a high building

user72 woah, bit dramatic

user71 🤷🏽‍♀️

user73 my two favs 🤩

user74 I think I’m in love with her not even kidding

user75 me too queen

user75 she’s genuinely so pretty 😭

user76 they’re such pretty people, I need couple photos NEOW

user77 hard-launch 🔜 pls

user78 why are they pretending like we don’t know who their launching 😭

carlossainz 😍

yourusername 🤭 ❤️

user79 alright so now we definitely know who that is 😭

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yourusername added to their story

carlossainz

mi amore

I sent you that in confidence 😩

yourusername

Sorry baby

You just look so cute 🤭

carlossainz

Ah I cant be mad at you querida

But that definitely feels like a “hard-launch”

yourusername

I guess it is 😅

carlossainz

at least I get to post you now 🫶

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carlossainz

liked by yourusername charles_leclerc and 5,001,009 others

carlossainz amor de me vida 😍

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user80 YAYYYYYY

user81 finally 😭

user82 love of my life 🥹

user83 my favorite couple

charles_leclerc ah congratulations!

carlossainz Gracias Charles!

user84 ❤️❤️❤️

user85 THEYVE LAUNCHED

user86 smooth operatorrrrr

user87 beautiful couple ❤️

user88 awwww 🥹

user89 HES DONE IT

user90 y/n posted that story and he was quick with the relationship post 😭😐

user91 he needed us to know lmao

user92 endgame fr

user93 they're so pretty together 🫶

user94 Carlos has been working for this for months, proud of him

user95 can't stop the grind

user96 smooth operator on and off the track

user97 🌶️🌶️🌶️

user98 wait they feel so real like they actually like eachother

user99 “like”? That man is in love with her idc

user100 lmao he definitely acts like it

landonorris smooth operatorrrr

liked by carlossainz

user101 lmao even Landos using the joke

user102 I can’t they’re so perfect 😭

yourusername love youuu 🥹🫶

carlossainz te amo mi sol ❤️

user103 THE HEART EYES IN THE CAPTION!!! 😭😭😭😭 I LOVE THEM!!!

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@casperlikej @evie-119

[incorrectbatfam]

Do the batfamily members ever get too into their undercover work? (Undercover in an office and theyre worried about spreadsheets, working in a warehouse and coming home complaining about missing parts)

Bruce: Status updates on your undercover missions. Dick, you first. What have you got down at the docks?

Dick: I haven't confirmed the Killer Croc sightings yet, but more importantly, our catch hasn't been measuring up to last year's. Tuna we're doing okay on, but the salmon population seems to be on the low end. I've contacted the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries but it'll be another 3-5 business days before they can come down and check it out.

Bruce: At least you're doing something to help. Jason?

Jason: Class was okay. I think the kids are warming up to me as their substitute while Mrs. Maloney is out on maternity leave. The average on the last vocabulary quiz was 83.53% so either I'm doing my job right or they need to be challenged. I'm worried about Tristan Lancy, though. He's normally a good student but his grades have been dropping recently and his parents don't seem like safe people to tell. I'll talk to him tomorrow and try to pair him up with a peer tutor if he needs it.

Bruce: Also see if he has any alternate contacts besides his parents. Tim, any updates at the chemical plant?

Tim: If by updates you mean OSHA violations, I could go on all week. We got a batch of new recruits today and they were just thrown into the work—no PPE, no safety training, nothing. This is what happens when you place production over employee well-being. I'm gonna file a complaint after this meeting. Also, I think the union will have something to say about the manager cutting people's lunch breaks short.

Bruce: I see. Damian? Please tell me you found something volunteering at the zoo.

Damian: Depends on how you define "found." While I have not obtained evidence of a mutant larvae black market, I did help some of the animals at the sanctuary make progress with their recovery. Bobo the monkey is healing from his broken arms and we're gradually getting him re-acclimated to climbing higher surfaces. Suzie the black bear was born a little prematurely but seems to be catching up to her peers in terms of growth. Lastly, we got a grant for additional wildcat research and enrichment. As an aside, we are having an educational seminar on European mountain goats this Friday at 3:30 and I expect all of you to be there.

Bruce: I'll put that on our calendars. Steph?

Steph: It's not really undercover work for me, just work. Anyway, yes the newest Batburger location is being used for money laundering. But I really need to vent about the customers for a sec. We don't open until 10 and at 9:30 this morning some moron was banging on our door demanding Jokerized cheese fries. Then right in the middle of the lunch rush, Janie got sick so I had to fill in as the cashier and it was hell. After that, I had to step in between a fight at the drive-thru because the customer claimed we only gave him nine pieces of his ten-piece Robin nuggets and tried to beat up the kid who took his order. And to top it all off, an entire high school hockey team came in five minutes before closing.

Bruce: Cass?

Cass, blowing balloons: Can't talk. Arranging bat mitzvah.

Bruce: Duke, you're my last hope.

Duke: Margie's bringing a peanut butter chocolate cake to the bake sale. I swiped her recipe and we can easily beat her. Her ganache is way too watery and just runs off the top of the cake, which isn't even leveled. She's also trying to do something with a raspberry filling that isn't working at all. It's like she couldn't decide on what to bring. The bake sale committee also asked if we can bring some apple pies because the original baker has to go out of town for a family emergency. I think we'll win if we bring them with some ice cream and a touch of caramel, even though this isn't a contest.

Bruce: Thank you. At least our most critical case has been taken care of.

Barbara: ...I'll save my book launch for later.

[kaylopolis]

Alastor's Shadow (18+) - My Fawn & My Shadow: Chapter Eighteen

Alastor x F!Reader

Synopsis: There’s a new Overlord in town and it isn’t the Radio Demon. Six years after you fell into Hell, you have finally earned your seat at the table as Pentagram City’s newest and baddest and with the Extermination coming six months earlier than planned, it is now time to implement your ultimate endgame. After all, who doesn’t love a bit of power and chaos? Your plan brings you to the doorstep of the Hazbin Hotel as Charlie’s newest Redeemer, but who you find waiting for you will not only turn your entire plan upside down but also challenge your grab for power… 

Tag List: Slow burn, rivals to lovers, eventual smut

Masterlist Link: Masterlist

(Let me know if you want to be added to the Tag List!)

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Author note: Dear Hoteliers,

Why 2 alternate endings? A few reasons; the main reason is because I wrote this first part with Angel and Mikaela and FELL IN LOVE with it. It was so cute and adorable I had to include it somehow. Also, because not everyone loves a pregnancy trope. I, particularly, was genuinely torn. I could not decide how I wanted things to end. "My Fawn and My Shadow" will include a pregnancy trope but "Paris" will not.

I will say, the epilogue I have planned for "My Fawn and My Shadow" had me crying (were they happy tears? were they sad tears? Is she foreshadowing? IDK!) - but, that being said, to each their own. Should you choose to read both, be aware that some sections are straight up copy and paste. The Epilogues will obviously vary greatly.

P.S. Ignore the timeline for the pregnancy trope. In reality, this is not how biology works. But someone *cough* author *cough* forgot to factor in the timeline by the time she got to this chapter... It was part of my original outline, but I got carried away *insert upside-down smiley face here*

<3 Stay smutty

My Fawn & My Shadow:

Chapter Eighteen

Content Warning: Unwanted Pregnancy, Suggestions of Abortion, Self Harm

T-6 Hours Before the Portal Opens...

“Angel!” you practically screamed, falling into the spider demon’s destroyed room. Well, technically, it was not destroyed; this was his normal state of being. 

You fall onto the bed, your foot catching on a wadded-up sweater on the ground. You got a face full of Fat Nuggets before Angel jumped up and almost punched you in the stomach. 

“What the fuck are you doin’ in here, Hairclip, screaming and scaring the shit out of me this early in the mornin���!?” He rubbed the sleep from his eyes. You noted the time - it was ten in the morning - not that early. Well, early for Angel. 

“I need you to come with me somewhere,” the anxiety was bubbling in your chest, overflowing into your words.

Angel paused, “Is everything okay? Is it the Extermination? Did they come early!?” 

“Angel,” you bite. “Please?” 

He looked at you, trying to read behind your eyes, before fully seeing how serious you were. He nodded before pushing Fat Nuggets to the side so he could get up and dress. 

“So, uh, where we goin’?” He asked as he pulled on a pair of pants. The demon struggled a bit, be it the sudden cessation of slumber or the booze from yesterday, or both, you didn’t know.

You curl into yourself on his bed, knotting your hands together to stop the shaking. “Wrath.” 

Angel froze, his eyes alight with shock. “I’m sorry, toots, I don’t think I heard ya’ right. Wrath? As in the Circle of Hell?” 

You nodded. 

“Wow,” he gawked. “This is serious… Wait, I can’t leave Pride, so how…” 

You snapped your fingers before he finished his sentence, amassing a portal in the middle of his room. The Circle’s familiar orange glow illuminated his white fur. 

Angel jumped backward and fell on the ground, his mouth gaping at the interdimensional crack you just punched into his bedroom wall. “Holy shit fuck!” 

Oh, you forgot only Alastor knew you could do that. Desperate times, however…

“You can, actually,” you shrug. “Just gotta take a different door.” 

Angel looked between you and the wall a few more times before shaking his head and finished dressing. 

Your mind was numb, your thoughts all jumbled into a knotted mess. How could this have happened? It wasn’t possible. It just wasn’t…

“Hey,” he put a hand on your knee, pulling you from your thoughts. “Ya’ okay?” He looked down at you with wide eyes. Angel was the only one you could trust right now. 

You nod before taking his hand. 

Wrath was a time capsule, stuck in the ages of the Wild West: the American Frontier. Fitting the place named for anger was a desert. 

Despite the change of seasons in the world above, Wrath was scorching. Although the Harvest Moon Festival was still a few months away, the locals were skittering about the small town in preparation. They were so busy they didn’t think twice at the two strangers zipping through the traffic, hidden under hoods and glasses. Angel protested at first, but once you pointed out that Wrath natives were imps, then he understood - the spider demon would stick out like a sore thumb. 

The demon ducked under the doorframe - probably three times the height of an average imp, but you couldn’t help that. The imps stared but not too long. 

“A convenience store? You dragged me all the way down here for a candy bar?” Angel spun in circles, taking in everything. 

God, he was so obvious.

“No,” was all you could manage. 

Being a Native Heaven born you were subject to certain… biological processes that Human Sinners were not. No surprise the Pride Ring didn’t sell the necessary products to aid in those situations, so you’d slip down here, grab a few things and head back up. 

But this…

You headed down the aisle labeled “Feminine Products” and stopped deadpan at what you were looking for. There were so many options, how did you know which one was the right one? 

“So hey, how about we check out a bar while we’re… Oh,” Angel came to a stop next to you, noticing the blood drain from your face at the things you were looking at. “Oh, shit, Hairclip.” 

“Yeah,” your voice cracked, trying to hold back tears. 

Angel’s hand found your shoulder. He shook his head. “But how? I thought Human Sinners couldn’t… ya know?” 

“Reproduce.” You filled in the blank for him. “Me neither.”

Angel was silent for a moment, letting it all sink in. 

“But…” your lip quivered, “then I remembered my brother and Lilith. Where Adam was the first human soul in Heaven, Lilith was the first human soul in Hell, technically, and they had Charlie. I’m an Angel, like my brother and Al is a Human Sinner so…”

“Shit,” Angel breathed. 

Then you started to chuckle, “I don’t even know which one to buy.” 

Angel pulled you close, “Me neither, dollface, but we’ll figure this out together. I’m assuming you got money?” 

You nodded, the anxiety bubbling over into silent tears on your face. You started hiccuping, the emotional wave too much for your frazzled mind to handle. 

Angel grabbed all five of them, paid for them with the Native money you pulled from your pocket, then dragged you into the bathroom and locked the door. 

You sat on the floor, Angel starting a timer for the three minute countdown. Longest three minutes of your life. 

The spider demon sat cross-legged across from you. “So, why bring lil’ ol’ me and not Smiles?” 

You hiccuped, bringing your knees to your chest and wrapping your arms around yourself. “The Extermination is today. I can’t… He can’t be thinking about me. He has Adam to deal with. He can’t…”

“And what about yous?” 

You breathed, “I’ll be on the field with you guys, just like we planned.” 

“But…”

“No.” You stopped him. “No, Angel. No matter what happens, Al can’t know. Not until after. Please,” you begged. “He can’t know anything is wrong he…” you hiccuped. “Al isn’t as strong and invincible as he seems.”

“Wow, here I thought you thought he walked on water.”

You dropped your face into your knees and gave a small sob. The memories of the fake Radio Demon being held hostage at Voxtech flit through your mind. And, although it wasn't actually Al tied to the chair, he was still a Human Sinner. Which meant he could die. You could as well but not as easily...

“Hey, hey,” Angel crawled to your side and pulled you into your arms. “Okay, okay, I won’t say nothin’.” 

“Not around radios either,” you sniffled. “They work both ways with Al.”

You had tested it in passing the other day. Just to see what would happen. Although Al was not happy about the dirty comment you made into his speaker - as it pulled him from important business in one of his territories - he didn’t seem too upset when he pulled you through his shadows and properly snogged you in the Hotel hallway.

“Shit, seriously? If that’s the case then that man’s heard a lot of things from me he shouldn’t have. A lot of fun noises, too.” The spider demon wriggled his eyebrows, making you giggle. 

Angel always knew how to bring a smile to your face. 

“So, can I ask ya’ somethun’?” Angel’s tone turned serious, making your heart skip a beat. “Is the sex good?” 

You snorted, drying the tears under your eyes. 

“Look I ain’t judging, Hairclip, but ya’ always come down with these bruises and… marks. Don’t get me wrong it's hot, but I just wanna make sure he ain’t like… hurtin’ ya’ or nothin’?”

“No, no Angel. Al is a gentleman, I assure you.” A small smile formed on your lips. 

“So?” He nudged you.

“Insanely,” you giggled. 

“Figures. He’s hung isn’t he?” He winks.

You snorted into your hand. “Angel!” 

“Oh, come on. You ain’t gonna tell me the Radio Demon ain’t packin’? No way, I don’t believe it.”

“Well…” your face turned a bright red.

“I fuckin’ new it!” Angel cheered. 

RING! RING! RING! 

You stopped breathing completely. Angel shut off the alarm, before turning to you. “You want me to…?”

You nodded, your eyes staring off into space, the only thing you could hear was the pounding of your heart in your ears. You couldn’t look up as Angel checked the tests, didn’t dare try to read the expression in his eyes and mouth. 

The demon grabbed one, wrapped in a paper towel, and knelt before you.

“Before I show you this,” he turned the test upside down so you couldn’t read it. “Tell me what you’re thinkin’.” 

A shaky breath escaped your lips, “I…”

What were you thinking? Fear, definitely fear, but were you devastated? Excited? Filled with hope or filled with dread? You didn’t know what to feel. You didn’t know what to feel because you didn’t know how Al was going to react if it came back positive. 

Would he be angry? Would he be excited? Would he even react at all? 

No. Your heart sank. No, he wouldn’t be excited. There are two things Al cares about: power, and chaos. There wasn’t room for anything else… or anyone…

You’d have to get rid of it. 

“I think, no matter what, I’ll tell Al after the Extermination tomorrow.” 

Angel nodded and flipped the test over. 

____________________________________________

T-3 hours until the portal opens…

“Okay, okay, I got this!” Collin breathed. 

Cletus banged him atop his head, “Just open the door!”

The sheep shot a dirty look at the… baby?... before drying his sweaty hooves on his overalls. 

This was it. This was the moment Collin had been waiting for his entire life. He has only ever seen the famous General at a distance and worshipped her from a far during meetings and through photographs. He had every single one of her fan club t-shirts and collector’s pins. He knew her battle strategies inside and out and scored perfect at every trivia night. He was the ultimate fan-girl and this was his moment to shine. 

And he was terrified. 

“Oh, my gosh!” Kennie shoved past him. “I’ll do it!” She prostrated before pulling the bedroom door open. 

The group froze, stunned by the sight of the yellow-eyed Angel ready and waiting for them on the other side. Mikaela Morningstar sat in a clothed chair perfectly perched in the entryway to her bedroom. The Angel had just finished the top laces of her leather boots before the Cherubs burst through the doorway. 

Mikaela had been waiting for them. 

Collin’s jaw audibly hit the floor at the sight of the warrior, legs crossed, one eyebrow perched in question, staring down at the three of them. She was like a goddess in material form - not to disrespect the Maker, of course. Her beauty practically radiated off of her in golden light as captivating as her irises. Although she had changed her hair and her wings were tucked out of the way, she was a vision. Collin couldn’t help but drool at the sight of her. 

“About time the three of you showed up,” the Angel laughed. “Talk about keeping a girl waiting.”

“You…” Cletus stumbled over his words. “You knew we were here?”

“Knew?” The Angel tipped her head in question. A habit she had picked up from a dear… friend. “You’ve been following me for days. Nifty’s collection of wool can only grow so much before a girl gets suspicious.” Mikaela laughed it off as if it was a joke, but Keenie’s head was still very, very sore. 

The Cherubs had no answer for her. 

“What can I do for you?” With hands perched in her lap, the General inspected the three of them, lazily soaking in their forms as they collectively entered the room. 

Wow. Mikaela Morningstar had expected them. Well, duh! Of course! She was God’s General! How could she not have seen them coming? She probably knew about everything: the phone call from Velvette, the orders from Rachel, their banishment from Heaven. She was, after all, an Archangel. Collin still couldn’t comprehend the situation. 

“Ms. Morningstar,” Collin began. Did he sound as nervous as he felt? “We have been sent from Heaven to return you to the Seraphim.”

The Angel blinked, but didn’t respond. Her face remained neutral as Collin spoke and even for a few moments after. He wiped his hooves on his pants again. The Cherub was thoroughly drenched in anxious sweat, which, hopefully, no one noticed. 

“Why?” 

“Why?” Kennie shoved her way forward. “Because you belong there? You’re Mikaela, the General, Heaven’s Archangel. You’ve been gone for over a hundred years doing…”

“God’s work.” Mikaela interrupted the sheep. 

“What?” Cletus asked. 

The Archangel chuckled. “You didn’t seriously think I just ran away from Heaven on a whim, did you?” 

The three Cherubs looked at each other for an answer, but it was the sheep who spoke first. “No, of course not!”

“Thank you, Collin,” Mikaela smiled. 

The Cherub’s heart jumped right out of his chest. “You know my name!?”

“Of course,” her eyes softened. “Why wouldn’t I know one of my biggest fans?”

____________________________________________

Yesterday…

“Hello, thank you for calling, C.H.E.R.U.B., how may we bless you today?”

“Hi! I’m calling about a loved one back on Earth who needs some help. It seems he’s lost his way a bit and I’d really rather not see him down here.” You twirled the cord in your hand.

Alastor sat across from you, a cup of tea in hand, one leg crossed over the other as he enjoyed the dyling light of day. 

“Of course! Can I get a name?”

“Well, actually… I’m quite protective of him, you see, and I want to know that you are sending your best.” The sweetness in your voice was practically sickening, but it made Alastor chuckle. “I was wondering who would be going. Would it be the three from the television commercial?”

“Cletus, Collin, and Keenie? By golly, no! They don’t work for us anymore.”

“Interesting…” You smiled. 

“Can I get the name of the person who needs a blessing?”

“No,” and you hung up the receiver. 

Alastor chuckled as he sipped his tea. “You make this look too easy, my doe. If it weren’t for the circumstances, you'd be running the place.”

This place... As in all of existence.

You grabbed your jasmine tea and clanked your cup with his. “How unfortunate the plan is to destroy it all instead.”

____________________________________________

Now...

The Cherub nearly feinted. 

The Archangel leaned in, speaking to the sheep directly. “You have to promise to keep everything I tell you a secret. No one can know that I am here.”

Collin blinked the stars from his eyes, “Of course! I would never!” 

In a whisper, Mikaela continued, “I’m on a secret mission from God. I can’t go into any detail, naturally…”

“Naturally!” Collin was nodding his head so hard he could have been mistaken for a bobble head. 

Mikaela leaned in a whispered, “... I’m here to find Roo.”

Collin stopped nodding. “Roo?”

“Roo.” Mikaela repeated, as if that answered all of their questions. 

“Wait!” Cletus interrupted once more. “You’re telling us that you are supposed to be here? Cavorting with demons!”

“Shhh,” Mikaela shushed. “Yes.”

Keenie scratched her sore head. “To find someone named Roo?”

“She’s the biggest threat against Heaven. Rumor has it that she’s planning an uprising against God. That’s why he left with me and went into hiding. Couldn’t have him unprotected while I hunted down this rebel.”

Too much information? Nope! Who the fuck is going to believe a bunch of banished Cherubs anyway? They can’t get back to Heaven and no one in Heaven would take them seriously even if they did. Negatives of fucking up with the Upstairs Management but a positive for you.

You could have told them any story that convinced them to leave you alone, and it would be no sweat off your back.

“Oooooooh,” Collin nodded. “That makes so much sense!”

“What!?” Keenie and Cletus echoed each other. 

“What?” Mikaela looked confused. “Do you think I’m lying?” She laughed. “Come now. I may be surrounded by demons, but I am still an Angel.” 

The three Cherubs blinked at her. 

“Oh.” Cletus awkwardly scratched his large head. 

Heaven Natives are so naive. Were you this gullible way back when?

The Angel adjusted the tie on her leather bracer. “And the three of you are interfering with my plan.” 

“What!?” Collin gawked. 

“I can’t exactly have Heaven stalking my every move while I’m on the job,” Mikaela rises from her chair, a towering figure over the tiny Cherubs. 

“Right! Right!” Collin was already headed for the door. 

Mikaela quickly ushered the other two out, ignoring the look of disbelief on their faces. 

“Thanks for understanding, guys.”

And then door shut behind them. 

Collin continued to drool in the direction of the doorway. 

“Now what?” Keenie asked as she dragged him by the collar down the hall.

“She’s so cool,” Collin gawked. 

Cletus smacked his face and rubbed the tension from his temples. “We return to Earth. I need time to think about this and I’m starving. I sure as fudge am not eating anything down here…”

____________________________________________

You shut the door behind them. 

“See,” you turned to the shadow at the back of the room. “I told you they’d believe me.” 

Alastor materialized from the darkness. With his cane in hand, he snaked the other around your waist and pressed a kiss to your forehead. You tried not to shutter at the contact, tried not to think about your stomach pressing into Al's…

This was not the first time you had run into one of Father’s minions. With Eve’s wild party streak, the two of you didn’t exactly keep a low profile. In fact, it would be odd for the two of you to not run into one of the Ishim or even a few Cherubs while they were on the job. You were recognized - because of course - and typically played it off as a happenstance run in while on a mission.

After all, the rumors in Heaven were that you were on some top secret mission with Father anyway. What were they more likely to believe: you were being a good little “Golden Girl” or playing Armageddon with Eve?

Eve on the other hand, either slept with the Holy invader if able, convinced them she was mortal if they were too young to know her face, or simply disappeared leaving you to fend for yourself.

What a friendship the two of you had…

“I never doubted you, my doe,” the demon mumbled into your hair. 

Trying to distract your mind before it decided to focus on the adventure from this morning, you grabbed for Alastor’s lapels to pull him down and…

“Alastor, what’s in your coat pocket?” Your fingers met something hard and boxy. 

The demon ignored your question. Instead, from the Void, Alastor pulled a hair clip - a new one. The metal was red, and pointed, with a small “A” pressed into one of the tongs. 

“I had Carmilla make it,” the demon holds the clip between the two of you, pushing you back so you are no longer pressed so closely together.

Which greatly helped the nerves. 

The red was a perfect match to Alastor’s eyes. 

How intentional… 

“Thank you,” you reached for it, but he pulled away. 

The demon was distracting you, but you allowed it. Your nerves were shot anyway and Alastor felt… off…

“Allow me?” He offered. 

Turning towards the mirror above the dresser, Alastor flipped your hair into a bun, clipping it at the back of your head perfectly square with your shoulders. 

You stared at the demon’s reflection in the mirror, noting the lack of music playing on his radio, noting the loss of static in his voice. He was nervous… 

“Al, everything changes after today. This is where the Endgame plan truly begins.” You tested the waters to see if that was what was bugging him.

“Hmm,” the demon continued to inspect your hair, his mind clearly stuck on something else. Not Armageddon playing his thoughts?

“But,” you turned to him, your back leaning against the dresser. “If I know war, and I do, there is always a lull after a battle. Perhaps, if just for a few days, we get out of here?”

“Oh?”

“I have safe houses in every Ring of Hell and in a few major countries on Earth - including an emergency backup in Heaven if things end up truly terrible… I have an apartment…” God, why were you so nervous? “In France.” 

The demon’s eyes sparked. 

“It’s in Place de l'Estrapade, not a far walk from the Pont Neuf bridge, just across the way from Jardin du Luxembourg*. I know it’s not Louisiana, but… There’s this adorable bakery in the square that I know you will love and…”

The demon swallowed your words with his lips. “Mes valises sont déjà faites. My bags are already packed.”

Right, why did you ever think Alastor Hartfelt would turn down a trip to France? 

Alastor’s shoulder slacked just a bit.

Then it hit you.

It was the after that was bugging him. After the battle that is. He comforted you last night in regards to your qualms with the battle, but funny how facing imminent death felt like an everyday for the Overlord.

But the after made him nervous.

The after…

Fuck, you promised Angel you’d tell Al after.

Your stomach turned itself into knots and threatened to spill all over the carpet. How would you explain that one to the demon?

Fuck.

Did you tell him now that you and Angel went to Wrath? Tell him what happened? Your mouth watered bitterly at the thought that you were lying to him - you had promised no more lies - but were you truly lying? This was for his own good. This was for his protection. If anything happened to Al, it would be your fault.

Your fault.

YoUr FaUlT.

YOUR FAULT.

The air was suddenly sucked from the room.

KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK!

“You lovebirds done shackin’ up o’ what?” Angel screamed from the other side of the wall. 

“Seriously?” Husk scoffed. “You called me up here for this?”

“What? Come on, Whiskers, you love spendin’ time with me,” Angel teased. 

You could practically hear the disbelief on Husk’s face through the door, “I thought you wanted me to help you bring something down, not hold your fuckin’ hand because you’re too scared of the Boss.”

“I ain’t scared of nothin’!” The spider demon protested. 

You smiled at Alastor, grateful for the spontaneous distraction. The demon pressed a kiss to your cheek and melted into shadow. 

Throwing the door open, both Husk and Angel jumped back in surprise before they realized it was just you. 

“Ha!” Angel crosses his arms. “See yous was scared, too!”

“I..!” Husk’s face turns red. “I was scared because she fuckin’ appeared outta nowhere, not because of…”

“Me,” Alastor melted from the floor, appearing behind the two of them. 

Angel jumped into you, grabbing onto your arm for support, while Husk remained utterly unphased. 

“Yeah, him,” the cat crossed his arms. 

You giggled at the sight of the two of them, the laughter breathing life back into your chest.

Just don't think about it... Yeah? Yeah! Don't think about it. Everything is going to be okay! It's fine. Everything is fine!

Taking a deep breath, you planted a smile on your face. “Come on, boys, we have an army to ready.”

You snuck a glance at Alastor, who looked distracted, wholly unaware of the nerves in your belly. Whatever was captivating him, you were thankful for it. It was quite uncharacteristic of him, but then again, you’ve never seen Alastor in the hours leading up to battle.

For whatever reason, you were disappointed in the last few remaining private moments you might possibly have with the demon. Not that you were expecting a big declaration of love from him.

Holy shit, you still hadn’t even told him you love him!

Oh, no, no, no, no.

You put the brakes on.

You’d been so distracted about this morning that you completely forgot about everything from last night! “Al, I need to talk to you-“

“There she is! There’s my little tomatuh!” Rosie had you in a hug so tight one would argue it was a chokehold.

“Rosie, dear! How delightful to see you!” Alastor pressed a kiss to the top of her hand. “Is that a new scarf? It looks astonishing on you darling, absolutely astonishing!”

The Overlord’s eyes shined like stars, “Oh! Al, stop! You flatter me.” Rosie ran a hand through her new purple boa.

“It isn’t flattery if it’s true!” Al came to stand beside you, his hands wrapped around the top of his cane.

The smell of the forest after rain calmed your nerves.

It’s okay. After. You can tell him after because there will be an after.

There will be an after.

Heading down the hall you ignored Angel's worried eyes on you. You ignored Alastor's shadow swirling about your feet with concern. And you ignored Husk's offer for a drink. For you had too many things to focus on right now...

A battle to win...

An identity to keep hidden...

A Human Sinner who still didn't know how you truly felt about him...

And a secret to keep...

Welcome to the Endgame.

____________________________________________

T-1 minute until the portal opens…

“This is it,” you press your forehead into Alastor’s. “Al, I -”

“Shh, my doe. Entre deux cœurs qui s’aiment, nul besoin de paroles,” and then the demon melted into shadow, to find his place atop the Hotel.

Goddamit, the demon switched between French and English so fast you couldn’t keep up half the time.

Charlie appeared next to you, a hand on your shoulder. “You’ll get a chance to tell him.”

You blinked. But how did she…?

“Uh,” Vaggie cut in. “I don’t mean to break up this moment, but we have Angels incoming.” The ex-Exorcist pointed her spear at the sky, where a large portal had cracked through the walls of reality.

Fixing your hood atop your head, you summoned your two short blades from the Void and readied yourself next to the Princess.

On the other side of the portal, you could make out the beautiful golden glow of Heaven. God, you did not miss it.

Two figures stepped through: Adam and Lute.

And then the onslaught began - but not before Alastor summoned his dark shield. The mass of magic covered the Hotel in a dome. Some of the Exorcists made it through, but the less fortunate ones bounced off in a wave of broken bones.

“It’s working!” Charlie screamed.

Until it wasn’t.

With a flick of Adam’s wrist the shield melted and then the exorcists fell through.

It was a dance of a battle. A beautiful pirouette of savagery and desperation, impregnating the air with the stench of golden iron.

You would have found yourself riding the high of battle had you not had Charlie to look after. Yes, Vaggie could well protect her on her own but it was the deal with Lilith that ensured no harm came to the princess.

As the princess shot sparkles you shot daggers. As she sang apologies you delivered death. Constantly you were forced to grab her by her wrist and twirl her from danger. It was hard work, one that captivated all of your attention.

Good. You needed the distraction.

BOOM!

Cherries’ explosions began, the next line of defense before the Exorcists reached Sir Pentious and his battery of cannons.

This was good! Things were looking good!

Fuck you might actually all make it out of this thing.

BAM!

The next thing you knew, you were on the ground, a pain so powerful ripping through your core it blinded every sense, every fiber of your being.

Green light exploded from the scar which cut you from neck to hip, a beacon of agony which temporarily halted the onslaught from Heaven as Human Sinners and Angels alike were forced to shield their eyes. The wall of light shot up into the atmosphere of Hell before dispersing into a rainstorm of sparks that fell upon the whole of Pentagram City.

You felt, rather than saw, hands upon you. The green had burned your retinas, completely blinding you. Your body healed fast, however, but not fast enough to clearly make out the fuzzy grey/red blob shaking your shoulders.

“Come on, kid! Come on! Don’t quit on me!”

The pain numbed your body, but your Angelic blood quickly fought against it. Your fingers and toes tingled as your mind reset itself over and over again. Where are you? What happened? The memory of pain threatened to spill as the ability to breathe found your lungs, as your eyes remembered how to blink.

“Holy Hell, what da fuck was that!?”

“I don’t fucking know, but both Boss and her went down at the same time.”

“What da fuck kind of Voodoo shit did he do ta ‘er?”

You forced your mind to clarity, forced the blurriness into - somewhat - sharper objects. A vague outline of Husk and Angel came into view, along with a background of Exorcist Angels flying overhead. The fighting had resumed despite the interruption.

“Husk?” You mumbled. Grabbing onto the cat’s paw, you slowly pulled yourself into a sitting position. Despite the pain which had surged through your scar, no wound was visible. You hadn’t been struck after all. “What…?”

There was a pull behind your navel - it was weak, oh-so weak.

Alarm bells immediately went off.

Alastor.

Without a thought, you shoved away from the cat demon and shot into the air, not caring that your wings were now on full display for the entire Angelic Army to view. Not caring that the hood Charlie helped make you was now shredded to pieces.

You hit the roof, landing practically on top of the red and black mass crumbled in a heap of blood. Using your black wings, you attempted to shield as much of Alastor as you could.

You couldn’t make out Alastor completely, your vision was still sluggish to return despite you willing your blood to heal as fast as it could, but you could feel him. You could feel his heart beating wildly, feel the pain with every breath, feel the one ounce of panic the Overlord allowed himself to feel in this moment as he watched you take up a defensive fighting stance over his prone form.

The demon was hurt and bad.

Like a panther protecting her wounded mate, you unleashed the full force of your power. Dark and twisted horns grew from your skull as you morphed into your demon form. A spiked tail uncurled from your backside, your fingernails sharpened into claws, and your fangs elongated to a point. The sclera of your eyes flashed black as the rune on your back was unlocked, the text from the Book of Knowledge melting into your hands, forming an exoskeleton of Newtonian fluid that flowed over your appendages.

As your vision healed, the Angel’s stupid helmet sharpened, a look of pure shock reflected in the metal. Adam had his guitar and Alastor’s blood was still fresh as it dripped off the blade.

“Don’t…” Alastor protested, but his sentence was cut off with a cough.

“Mikaela?” Adam’s jaw dropped.

Your only response was a low growl. Pure instinct had kicked in. You were more animal than Angel.

You felt the coldness of Rolf wrap around your ankle, but it was barely a whisper compared to how solid the shadow normally felt. The shadow tugged, threatening to whisk you away from the rooftop, but be it the weakening of Alastor’s magic or your stubbornness, you did not move.

“Holy shit, it is you! How you doing, sister?” The First Man smiled, lowering his sword.

Behind you, you could feel the blood flowing from Alastor’s chest as real and as solid as it would your own. It only added to the panic and anger and desperation you were feeling in this moment.

“Where’s Eve?” The Angel looked around as if the Second Woman might turn the corner at any moment and join the conversation.

“Dead,” you bore your teeth and growled, your voice laced with Alastor’s radio static.

“What?” Adam did a double-take.

You pulled your sword from the Void, your blue fire licking the steel’s surface as small green bouts of static danced its way down your arm and disappeared into the heat. “And you’re next,” you threatened, your voice filled with static.

“Wait,” Adam narrowed his eyes, his pupils darting back and forth between the two of you as he slowly put the pieces together. “Wait. Wait. Wait.” He put up a hand. “You’re defending this loser?”

You growled, your teeth itching to sink into flesh.

Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. Kill him. A voice rang in the back of your head.

“Woah, there, sister. We’re on the same fucking team!” Adam had a look of pure terror on his face.

From your crouched position on the ground, you moved forward.

Adam immediately dropped his sword and began backing up. “Listen! Listen! Listen!” He stammered. “Let’s just take a fucking second and talk like bros. Okay?” His laugh was strained. “I’m sure there’s a perfectly good explanation for why you’re down here defending the scum of existence? Ha, ha. Right?”

Kill him, the voice commanded.

You growled again and attempted to take another step forward, but a clawed hand wrapped around your tail and tugged. Finally, you turned to face Alastor and the sight knocked you out of your bloodthirsty trance.

The demon was pale, a deep gouge sliced right across his chest in an exact mirror image to your injury from Velvette. You felt the anger flee from you then, only to be replaced with pure terror. You met Alastor’s stern eye and the look he shot you stopped you dead in your tracks.

But it was already too late. All of Heaven had seen. Mikaela Morningstar was alive and well in Hell, defending Lucifer’s daughter in a battle against Heaven. You had killed Exorcists. A war was brewing, and you were a part of it.

The demon shuttered out a pained breath, one you felt reverberate through your own chest. You dropped your sword, the steel popping back into the Void before it even made contact with the ground. Falling to your knees before Alastor, you cupped his face in your hands and pressed a soft but shaky kiss to his forehead.

“What, the fuck?” Adam gawked behind you.

Every part of you was screaming to rip the Angel limb from limb, but you fought the instinct, and instead channeled that energy into the connection that had ripped open between you and Alastor. You let your magic flow through your inky fingers and into the demon, willing his heart to beat faster, to slow the blood seeping from his wounds, to staunch the pain in his chest.

Alastor’s eyes fluttered closed as he took a deep breath, already the color returning to his cheeks.

You turned to Adam then, your black sclera burning pure hatred into the Angel’s heart. “I won’t be the one to kill you today, Adam.”

“I am so fucking confused,” the Angel scratched his head.

“Adam!” Charlie appeared atop the rooftop, royally pissed as she hung from the Hotel sign.

And with that, you shadowed the two of you from the rooftop, landing in the only place you could think of to go right now: Alastor’s radio tower.

Atop the balcony, you pulled the clip from your hair and slit open your wrist, dripping a waterfall of golden blood into Alastor’s wounds.

“Stop,” the demon tried to shove your hand away, but he was too weak at this moment to do anything other than lay there and breathe.

Clenching your jaw shut, you didn’t let up until you watched the first stitches of skin begin to form. Jesus Christ, the wound was deep. It had cut through several ribs but, thankfully, had not nicked his heart. Alastor would have been dead before you had even landed on that rooftop had it gone any deeper.

Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! You knew! You fucking knew this was going to happen!

A tear fell from your cheek and landed in the mixture of black and gold liquid swirling atop the demon’s chest.

“Stop,” Alastor said more forcefully. The demon wrapped a hand around your wrist, the golden liquid bubbling through his fingers. He pulled you down into him and pressed his forehead into yours. “I’m alright, my doe.”

“This is my fault,” your voice cracked. Green static danced across your skin, your demon form still out in full force. Sucking in a breath, you forced yourself to your feet. Sinking your inky hands into your hair, you paced the floor, your wings dragging behind you.

Alastor’s magic jumped off your form in sparks. Which was impossible but you didn’t have the mental room to even consider why.

Alastor had almost died! He could’ve died! Adam almost killed him!

“My doe,” Alastor attempted to sit up, but the pain from the wound was too much, his body demanding every ounce of power to heal.

“My fault,” you shuttered. “My fault. My fault. My fault!” You bent over the handrail and threw up.

Alastor jumped to his feet then, one hand wrapped around his middle to stop his insides from spilling out. “Mikaela!”

Using his cane for support, the demon forced himself to stand next to you. His red irises bled into your soul, his brow crinkled with worry.

Your entire body was shaking as he wrapped his arms around you. “It was not your fault.”

“We almost lost you,” you mumbled into his coat jacket, drenched in blood.

“We?”

____________________________________________

Somewhere Else in Hell…

“Ha, ha,” Striker plucked the cigar from his mouth and tapped the lit end into the cement lining of the roof.

The imp pulled the rifle to his shoulder and aligned the scope with his eye. “Too easy.”

And pulled the trigger.

____________________________________________

You saw the bullet before you heard it.

BANG!

The metal object soared towards you as if in slow motion, the iconic swirls of Angelic Steel clearly coating its surface.

But the bullet meant for you did not hit its mark.

For Alastor shoved you at the last moment, appearing between you and the shooter.

Red irises met yours, “Mourir d’amour, vivre de haine…”

The bullet met its mark right between Alastor’s eyes.

Dying for love…

“Nooo!”

The demon went down, his cane smacking against the metal balcony in an explosion of green sparks.

You spun, immediately knowing where the bullet originated from. You didn’t care who or what was on the other end. Fuck you didn’t even care why.

Kill, the voice echoed as a blast of dark ink shot out from your hand. Like a wave of a tsunami, the mass collided with the building the shooter was perched atop of, taking out the top twenty floors. You swung down, collapsing the building in on itself in one fell swoop.

Whoever it was - plus the inhabitants of the building - were dead.

“Alastor!” You screamed as you collapsed onto the ground next to him. Dark blood pooled beneath his head. The wound between his eyes steamed with green as his magic desperately fought to heal.

But fought in vein.

You watched as Alastor’s eyes fogged with the veil of death.

“No! No! No!”

And felt his Soul fade from his body.

“Alastor!”

You screamed. You begged. You cried.

“Don’t!”

You even heard yourself begging with God to let him live.

“You promised you wouldn’t leave me again!”

But you could do nothing as his Soul slipped from his body…

“No! Don’t! You can’t!”

… and faded from this world entirely.

“Don’t leave…”

Alastor was dead.

“Don’t leave us…”

____________________________________________

You don’t know how long you lay there.

Minutes?

Hours?

Days?

Years?

Long enough that Alastor had grown cold next to you. Long enough that the blood began to crust against your skin. Long enough that your joints hurt and your body begged to move.

He was gone.

Alastor was gone.

You curled into him, praying somehow your warmth might leech into him and warm his cold body back to life. Praying he’d brush a hand through your hair and tell you everything was going to be alright.

Praying this was just a dream.

Praying that you were the one dead instead.

Praying that you were both dead and this was some sick version of Purgatory Father had concocted for you as a punishment.

“Al…” You mumbled into his jacket, your fingers curling around his lapel as if he would fade beneath your touch entirely.

Too soon. Too fast.

And all your fault.

All your fault…

And then your fingers brushed something hard.

In his jacket, hidden away in a pocket you didn’t know he had, was a small leather box.

Fuck.

No. No. No. No. No.

Sitting up with alarm, you dropped it on the balcony and scooted away.

That better not be what you think it is.

Open it.

You jumped.

A young woman with hair as brown as mud and eyes to match sat across from you. Cross legged, arms folded neatly in her lap as her curls pooled down her back, the girl stared intently at the small leather box.

Open it, she repeated.

You didn’t respond, your mind was too preoccupied with trying to comprehend how this was happening.

It’s a ring, obviously, but you already knew that. You think that’s why he was so distracted today? She motioned to the blood. So distracted he didn’t even notice the fawn growing in your womb. How pathetic…

“Shut up!” You bit, your throat raw from years of crying.

Ouch. Is that anyway to greet an old friend? Oh, wait, sorry. Were we even friends? I mean, you did murder me and all. Did Alastor…

“I said, shut up, Eve!”

Her eyes found the box once more. Do you think he’s an emerald man or a diamond man? Emerald is more classic for the 30s but diamonds! Ugh, I’m just dying to know, aren’t you?

She went for the box, but you were faster. You held it against your heart, “Don’t touch it!”

Eve gasped, Is that why he asked you to take him to Louisiana to visit his Mother!? Awww, he stayed behind to tell his Mom about the ring. How sweet. Too bad she wasn’t actually there. - ya know, being in Heaven and all. But I suppose it’s the thought that counts.

“Why are you here?” The words seeped out from behind clenched teeth.

She smirked. Because you let me out.

You followed her eyes to your hand, still black from the ink. You never sealed the power away after desecrating the building.

Fuck, you were still in your demon form.

You’ve never let me out this long before. Figured it was time to stretch my legs and finally introduce myself. She stood and made her way to you, stretching her limbs as she went. Holding a hand out to you she made to help you stand.

Hello, I’m the Book of Knowledge, but you can call me Eve and we are going to have so much fun together.

You didn’t take her hand.

Your eyes found the dark jacket seeped in blood laying a few feet away.

You went to him, your fingers brushing the curls away from his face. With his eyes closed he looked as if he was sleeping - so peaceful.

Even in death Alastor smiled.

The girl frowned, clearly annoyed that you weren’t giving her your full undivided attention. What about power and chaos, and all that jazz? What about revenge!?

To power and chaos…

Your hand found your belly. “There is no power and chaos without him.” Pressing a kiss to his forehead. You whispered, “I love you, too.”

Wait, so that’s it? Eve threw her hands in the air. The plan is over? The big Endgame we’ve been planning for over one hundred years is just done!?

You stood, “New plan.”

New plan? Eve scrunched her nose. What new plan?

You smiled softly, the dark ink slowly invading your arm, “The one where everyone dies.”

Oh! Oh! Oh! I like that plan. Where do we start?

You turned to the pile of rubble 100 yards away. “Greed.”

*Yes, this is totally where Emily in Paris is shot lol

Annnnnnnd yet another cliff hanger. Come on guys you know me by now. Not everything is as it seems!

Hang in there :)

-> My Fawn & My Shadow: Epilogue

Tagged Hoteliers: (Let me know if you wish to be added!):

@sirens-and-moonflowers @wonderlandangelsposts @saccharine-nectarine @goyablogsstuff @mommymilkers0526 @eris-norwega

@missgirlsstuff @alastor-the-radio-demon @sillywormtrixareforkids

@its-a-dam-blue-brick @cloverresin20 @blue-bird251 @speedycoffeedelight @littlebluefishtail @sawi1987 @mopeyghost

@beelz3bub @fraugwinska @minamilinaqueen @demoarah @diffidentphantom @divineknightmare @animecrazy76 @sleepykittycx @graunta @reath-solia @satansdaughter123 @mysticatto @freshonyourpages @chibistar45 @rapunzelbro

@stephydearestxo

[octorockff]

Rush Hour

Lucy hated rush hour with a passion. Who in their right mind would like to squeeze in jam-packed transporting tube, filled with body odors and humid air? No sir, not her.

But the young editor didn’t have a choice as her boss Jason, the chief editor of the Crocus Weekly, had urgently requested her to gather the material to prepare for their sudden, exclusive interview with the hot shot - Salamander last minute.

Being a people pleaser and this was her boss, whom had helped her greatly when she was just starting out her career and normally was very reasonable with working hour, of all people, she readily agreed.

But she hasn’t anticipated the amount of work she had to pour in to prepare the material. Admittedly, sport was never her forte and this Salamander guy, who supposed to be a rising star in the baseball world, surprisingly having little to no information at all about him.

From grapevine, she learned that the guy avoided the paparazzi and presses like plague. The only information about him she got from the internet was general information that his club had released publicly, or snippets from group interviews.

Why he decided to change his mind and do an exclusive interview now of all time was beyond her. But she knew this was too good of an opportunity to pass up, and the information they collected from the Salamander himself would definitely put their magazine in the leading place.

With little information to work with, it certainly made her job all a lot harder. But Lucy has always been known as an overachiever, and she had never backed down from a challenge before. If anything, she was more than determined to scrape together whatever information nuggets she could find.

And finished it she did. With a list of strategic questions and leading topics that would surely encourage interesting answers, Lucy mentally patted herself on the back for making Jason proud.

However, that also meant her little investigation and info digging session dragged on longer than necessary. Meaning she was stuck in the worst possible train ride ever during rush hour.

Being squeezed between sweaty and depressed office workers was just what she needed on a Friday evening (not!).

And to make the matter worse, the hanging handle was just a bit out of her reach even if she tiptoed, snuffing out her last hope to stay balance on the occasional jerking train ride. Curse fate for her inconvenient height and the fact that all seats were taken!

A phantom feeling of her butt being groped filled Lucy’s veins with ice at the audacity of the pervert who dared to grope her blatantly in public.

Indignant swelled her heart and fueled her temper as the blonde turned around, ready to give the dirty fleabag a piece of her mind, when the sudden jerk of the train threw her off balance and sent her careening towards the door.

Cursing her rotten luck, Lucy squeezed her eyes shut and braced for the painful impact. But her falling momentum was reverse when the she felt something encircled her waist, pulling her body flushed against a wall of solid and warm muscles.

The smell of sandalwood and patchouli, with a hint of smoky campfire, filled her nostrils and Lucy couldn’t help but take a big sniff of the wonderful scent. She was a sucker for drool-worthy scent damnit!

Finally gaining her balance back, Lucy’s body went stiff as she realized the thing that wrapped around her waist in a vice-like grip was a toned, tanned arms - definitely belonged to a man, was still there. And it seemed like he had no intention to let go just yet.

Despite this man had saved her from a rather painful bump, the blonde was still skeptical of this total stranger and his intention with her. For all she knew, he could be the pervert that groped her earlier.

“Miss, miss! Are you alright?”

Turning around in the slightly slacken hold, Lucy was met with a rather stunning face, despite half of his upper features were shadowed by the band of his baseball cap.

Straight, high-bridged nose, cut jawline with sharp cheekbones, and a pair of brightly-lit, slanted viridescent staring down at her as his thin lips forming words she couldn’t hear. This guy easily ranked high in her top 10 of most attractive men list, and Lucy had had interviewed numerous hot celebrities to know what a good looking man was.

“Hey, are you listening? Did you somehow hit your head during your fall?” A large, calloused hand waved in front of her face, snapping the blonde out of her stupor. Heat rushing up her face and she was sure her complexion now rivaled that of a tomato. Damn, it must have been quite sometimes since she actually being in a close-range with such a handsome, good-smelling man that she was lost in a trance. Control yourself Lucy!

“No, I’m fine. I’m just a bit disoriented from the fall that I didn’t hear what you’re saying. Thank you for saving me.” Lucy signed as she put her hands against his chest to put a bit of distance between them, not that she could moved further out even if she wished, seeing how jam-packed the people around them still were. It’s a good thing those people didn’t care enough to pay attention to her and the mysterious guy.

“Aye, that’s great to hear! I’m glad you’re okay. Wouldn’t want you to smash your head against the door, it quite painful from my experience.” A toothy grin stretched across his face, showing off his sharp incisors and lit up his demeanor despite the shadow of his cap.

She couldn’t help giggle a little at his carefree remark, and she swore his smile stretched a tad bit wider and eyes a lil more sparkling at her laughing. But that was far-fetched thinking, so she quickly brushed it off as the lighting.

“So..what make you almost kiss the door like that?” He tilted his head and Lucy thought he looked like a curious puppy, a really cute one at that. But the reminder left the blonde in a sour mood as she thought back of the blatant disrespect she had faced.

Her expression must have been off putting, when the tall guy waved a hand in front of her face: “Whoa, you don’t have to tell me if it’s make you uncomfortable. I’m just worried - ah no, curious, yes, that’s all..”

Warmth filled her heart at his concern, not only he’s cute, but also kind as well, score Lucy! Patting his arm, which she now noticed was still wound around her waist loosely and something in her screamed how right it felt, she effectively stopped his sputtering and smile kindly at his reddening face.

“No, it’s okay. I’m just mad at the douche who dared to grope me earlier. I was about to give him a piece of my mind when the train jerked and threw me off balance.” A light frown marred his handsome face as he pursed his lips at her explanation.

“Well that’s not cool at all. No one should go through something like that. If you recognize the guy, let me know and I’ll be happy to pound him for ya.”

“Well, isn’t that nice of you Mr. Shining knight in armor. But unfortunately, I didn’t see their face so I guess they’re lucky to escape your justice wraith.”

“I’m no knight. I prefer to be known as a Dragon instead and you betcha I’m gonna beat the bad guys with my awesome dragon powers!”

Lucy laughed, and soon both of them guffawed at his silly declaration, making a few heads turned and stared at them incredulously due to their loud volume. But the blonde couldn’t find it in herself to care, too busy thinking how it was so easy to talk and joke around with a guy she just met.

Finally calmed down enough, she realized she didn’t even know the name of her savior, and that they were still standing so close that she could feel the warmth of the man’s body seeped through her clothes.

Blushing at their close proximity, and the fact that how unnaturally comfortable she was interacting and touching with a total stranger, Lucy spoke up:

“Say..I believe I didn’t catch your name. Mind telling me so I could thanks you properly?” Her fingers skirted up the length of his arms, barely rested on the man’s shoulder blade as she fluttered her eyelashes at him.

Lucy could hear his breath hitched and his pupils dilated, the hand on her waist unconsciously tighten its grip as his pretty eyes bored their gaze into hers.

Normally, she wouldn’t be so bold to flirt with a total stranger right off the bat, only when under the influence of alcohol or within the setting of social gathering. But she was heavily attracted to the man in front of her, be it his look or his charming personality, and she didn’t know if she’d ever see him again.

And Lucy was confident he’s interested in her too. She knew she was blessed with good genes and curves in all the right places, and was witty enough to hold any types of conversation. And not to mention, she was certain her savior had definitely tried to prolonged the contact and conversation between the two of them as he had yet to let go, or excuse himself after helping her.

That was all the good signs, so why not let him know she was interested as well?

“Why, how forgetful I was. But it couldn’t be help when you was the only thing I could focus on, any minor details seemed to slip my mind.” His voice dropped to a low timbre, the baritone tickled her brain in the most delicious way, and his large warm hand on her back pushed her closer until their front pressed flushed together.

“The name Natsu, and yours?” His name practically rolled off his tongue in a near purr. Natsu leaned down closer until the tips of their noses nearly touched, and Lucy could see tiny specks of gold ladened within his pools of vivid green.

For a fleeting second, his name reminded the blonde of Salamander, both of them bore the same name after all. But there’s no way the famed baseball player would end up on the same train, and openly flirted with her..right?

From what she knew, if there’s anything that could instantly rat out the sport star, it would be his shocking pink hair and motion sickness.

But the guy in front of her looked fine, though his cap had hidden any visible hair strands, and the varsity jacket he wore made it hard to tell whether he had any motion patches on or not.

Anyways, she quickly dismissed her silly thoughts and focused back on the sole objectives of getting this cute guy’s contact.

“It’s Lucy. And your name would definitely look amazing on my contact list.” She matched his tone, and her full lips curved up in a sensual smile that would surely swayed any man to see her ways.

“Pretty name for a pretty girl. I like your confidence, it looks hella sexy on you. Was ‘bouta ask for your number anyways, cuz I’d love to see you again beautiful girls”

Inwardly, Lucy nearly swooned from his praises and her ego had sky-rocketed to the roof for snatching such a hunk. But she maintained a cool facade and dig through her purse to get the phone.

After exchanging their contacts, the blonde was about to chat with Natsu some more when the intercom announced the arrival of her destination.

Sullen from the abrupt end of their conversation, Lucy reluctantly pushed herself away from the male, when he caught her hand and raised her palm to his lips, putting a light peck to the skin.

“Text me when you’re home, I wanna know if you’ve arrived safely” Natsu mumbled, his slightly chapped lips moving against her palm, effectively turning Lucy into a tomato with how flushed her face became.

Pulling her hands away, she gave him a timid nod and a bashful smile, no longer the brazen girl as she escaped from their own bubbles previously, as she rushed off the train before the door closed off.

Watching the train rode off, her stomach was filled with butterfly and a mixture of elated and nervous feeling swelled up her heart, and Lucy couldn’t help but cupped her mouth and squealed a little like a crushing schoolgirl at the whole event.

Who knew getting stuck within a rush-hour train ride, would lead her to such amazing encounter - as if it was fated. Lucy really hoped that they would get to meet each other again.

Little did she know, her wish would be granted in such a spectacular way, and led to something more than what she could ever hope for.

[emisdetermined]

I was thinking I hadn't played LobCorp in a while so when I opened the game the other day I decided to do a fresh run starting from day 1 I thought; "it sure would be fun to challenge myself with a run where I rolled a d6 to decide which abnos to pick"

The last thing I was expecting was for my game to glitch and give me WHITENIGHT AS MY STARTING ABNO Typically you're always given the same starting abnormality It's an easy ZAYIN level abno by the name of One Sin and Hundreds of Good Deeds This abno is always given to you because it has some special interactions with WhiteNight that normally aren't possible without it So already this is off to a great start But it gets better...

Apparently the last time I worked with WN I left it with exactly 666 PE-Boxes Starting with a single lvl IV nugget with lvl III stats, I had pretty low expectations for their survival but I wondered if the run was possible So I started the day.

Upon TOUCHING the containment unit, Max panicked and WhiteNight breached They didn't even do a single box worth of work There must have been some sort of stipulation for having at least 2 nuggets in the facility in order for WhiteNight's abilities to work???

Thankfully, you start with just enough LOB points to hire another nugget Welcome to the team, Courtney! With newhire Courtney on standby, Max was able to do just enough work with WhiteNight to meet quota before dying right in front of their coworker

Day 2 and we can finally pick a new abno but I haven't forgotten about rolling dice to randomize which ones I get The run begins now...

[emo-batboy]

Depression meals Battinson has made himself at least once while unsupervised to the shock and horror of Alfred

(Alfred has to sleep at some point. that’s when Bruce decides to wreak havoc and make these barely edible monstrosities)

(Btw he’s vegetarian, fucking fight me)

Pepper jack cheese between two seaweed sheets

Uncooked ramen dipped in the seasoning packet

Ready rice with cold tofu

Spoonfuls of peanut butter

Instant grits with one slice of American cheese

Pop tart dipped in hot chocolate

Spaghetti noodles with no other ingredient than a mountain parmesan, didn’t even put salt in the water

“Technically bread” (water and flour, microwaved…he was having a really bad day)

Bread, cheese, ketchup, microwave = pizza

Cream cheese and jelly sandwich

Vegan hot dog microwaved without a plate. He picked it up from the microwave with a piece of white bread and ate it just like that. No dirty dishes

kraft mac and cheese with one single raw asparagus

Various little kiddie-themed smoothie shots

Dry cereal

Cheddar cheese wrapped in a flour tortilla

Vegan dinosaur nuggets (microwaved, tho he tried to cook it in his hot coffee once, it didn’t work)

Frozen snap peas straight from the bag, unthawed

Tomato soup with cheez-its sprinkled on top

Tried to make a meal completely out of vitamin supplements once, based entirely on the exact amount of nutrients you need in a day

A family-sized bag of generic brand corn chips

Hard boiled eggs (they were supposed to be soft-boiled) and paprika

Blueberry bagel, toasted, no butter

Cold chicken noodle soup in one of those paper cartons from the corner store (it gave him food poisoning)

Microwave grilled cheese

Cucumber rolls (cucumber slices he rolled in microwave rice)

Leftover cake washed down with a protein shake

A hunk of mozzarella cheese, microwaved

Frozen Garlic bread (it’s actually good like that, he swears)

Four 5-hour energy shots to make a 20-hour energy (his heart rate didn’t go back to normal for two days)

Fruit snacks squished between two slices of wheat bread

Tried to dry scoop protein powder once, worked about as well as the cinnamon challenge

Pistachios with the shells (it was an accident. He did not notice)

Refried refried beans (for protein)

Handfuls of mushy, room temperature blueberries

Tofu block cut up with a spam slicer and dipped in mustard

[laniusbignaturals]

Joshua grew up in a culture that held to downright obnoxious standards of bodily purity so they might not have always had sufficient diets but they did eat food that was considerably less dangerous to consume than what your average wastelander ate. While Edward was born economically comfortable but culturally the equivalent of white trash (incompetent patriarchs and all!) only to emigrate to a disgustingly neglected & repressed urban hellscape. Which he tries desperately to cover up with nice clothes and a fancy vocabulary, but this classist insecurity about his home culture only gets surface level changes out of him. Edward isn’t interested in ~challenging the norms of his environment~ or whatever, behavior which might involve reconsidering stuff like his misconceptions, biases and what he’s been taught is normal to put in his mouth, Mormons included. He just doesn’t wanna look dumb.

All of which is to say you know when they were still shacked up in the Grand Canyon Edward was bragging about splitting fifty piece buckets of greasy overseasoned ambiguous grilled nuggets for lunch every day as a kid to this pasty little homeschooler who knows too much about firearms for it to be cool anymore. As Joshua nodded along smilingly and quietly contemplated the revolting reality that his new student/brother/father/boy best friend/hoe/housewife almost certainly ate his weight in armadillo meat from the age of three onwards.

[boinin]

I didn't want to give too much weight to Hiiragi's tarot reading schtick. Yet, it's an author insert moment, and Kaneshiro loves foreshadowing. I have a worrying feeling that these fortunes may hold true for Chigiri, Barou and Nagi.

Full disclosure: I know very little about tarot, but did some high level reading through Wikipedia and other sources.

Chigiri gets the 15th card of the Major Arcana, the Devil. In the official translation, Hiiragi notes this to represent seduction, betrayal and ruin. Oof.

The obvious connection is to Chigiri's leg—the fortune could be tied to how he was seduced by football, became addicted to it, but will subsequently be betrayed by his leg... leading to ruin.

The Devil tarot card doesn't normally show a bomb, so this is for dramatic effect. Thematically, it implies that Chigiri should find purpose (or know where to seek it) beyond football, ahead of the day his luck runs out. 🥺 Not the outcome I want for our princess, but a second ACL injury has long been speculated by fans. Chigiri himself is aware that it's a risk when playing at this level.

Barou chooses number 12, the Hanged Man. Hiiragi cherry-picks his interpretation; in addition, this card is associated with motifs of self-sacrifice, learning, and change in perspective. It can also be interpreted as a voluntary state, rather than something that befalls a person.

It's a good fit for Barou, who doesn't double down on his ego so much as grow to show why he's deserving of his nickname in the first place. Barou is a king on the pitch, and expects a level of servitude from his teammates, but not without constantly improving his own skills and talent. He's no lazy despot, though despot he may be.

The Hanged Man fortunes supports his emotional outburst during the Ubers match. Barou remarks that he needs the challenge of despair to grow. As such, the trials he puts on himself are deliberate, much like the tarot reading suggests.

Nagi gets #13, Death (because of course he does). This fortune seems to be the most thoughtful of the bunch, unsurprisingly. Hiiragi's interpretation, while intended to provoke Nagi above all, holds up well against what little I've read on tarot.

The Wikipedia page for the Death arcana had some additional nuggets of insight, or rather further ammunition for those of us manifesting a second NagiReo divorce:

Reo is frequently referred to as princely and compared to royalty in the series, with his superfluous wealth and the way he confidently takes on leadership roles among teams. His signature colour, purple, has monarchial associations due to how rare and expensive purple pigments are in nature (prior to the invention of synthetic dyes).

Of course Reo, this royal youth, opposes Nagi's desire to change... seemingly at every hurdle.

It's not deliberate sabotage though, more that they're hamstrung by their co-dependency. Unlike almost every other relationship in Blue Lock, which arose from rivalry or a shared desire to improve, Nagi and Reo's friendship is rooted in the naive promises they made before entering the programme. @thyandrawrites had a great post exploring this recently, which I recommend if you want to delve deeper into the reasons for their underperformance in the Neo Egoist league.

My take is, in essence, if these two could agree to remain friends while moving away from being inseperable on the pitch, they'd both flourish.

Back to tarot: Wikipedia also has a tidbit on reversed cards, which I understand aren't a hardwired aspect of reading tarot (it refers to physical cards that are revealed upside down after being shuffled and dealt). The interpretation Wikipedia gives of an inverted Death card is reminiscent of Nagi's status after he plays against Isagi and Bastard München.

In short: Nagireo bad for one another, and Nagi will undergo quite the metamorphosis in his journey through Blue Lock, if this fortune holds.

---

Analysis aside, I wouldn't put too much faith into what these fortunes mean for the characters. Tarot itself isn't immutable, and for every motif listed above, the characters also have other tropes influencing the paths they take. For example, Chigiri shares the whole hero/princess trope with Kunigami, which has more plot significance than his leg injury at present. Nagi embodies the role of a natural prodigy who has neither the knowledge or experience to deploy his talents consistently. Barou embodies an villain or anti-hero archetype, when juxtaposed with Isagi. Each character has more to the eye than a simple playing card can reveal which is why I'm here yapping at length about them during my lunch break

[germhammy]

“Girls Night 3- The challenge pt 5Final”

Kent: -wheeling out the prep cart, he revealed the sauce they had just tasted- That last one was called Surrender. And now for the final three!! Two will be familiar to you, Harley

Harley: oh my god. Must be A King’s Ransom Insanity and Houston We Have a problem. What’s the third?

Wednesday: X Factor. The current last dab is even hotter than Houston We Have a Problem!

Harley: oh god. Houston was delicious but definitely intense

Pippa: Harl, you put a big dab on your wing didn’t flinch when others gagged and cried? Intense? Then Jean challenged you to a staring contest? You put more on your wing and took another bite?

Harley: hey. My eyes were watering!

Kent put on a new pair of gloves. He places 5 nuggets in to a clean bowl and opened the A King’s Ransom Insanity sauce. They heard the crack of the seal. He poured a generous amount over the nuggets and mixed it up before them

Mr Johnson: it already smells hot

Enid held out a single serving bowl for each of the nuggets and placed them before the challengers

Harley and Wednesday ate their nuggets.

Wednesday: oh my. This is truly hot. But not really all that in terms of flavor. Or even peppers?

Harley: right? I didn’t want to say that on the show. I think its pepper is merely habenero? And capsaicin

Mr Johnson and Xavier were gagging and choking at the heat. Xavier was gulping down orange juice and Mr Johnson eating the cottage cheese

Wednesday: I do taste chipotle pepper I think. But the added capsaian and pepper extract just takes away from the taste

Kent was already preparing the next nugget with a new set of gloves and a new bowl. The cracked the seal on the next sauce. Mr Johnson and Xavier were still trying to cool down the heat. Kent placed the next bowls down.

Mr Johnson: I can’t believe the two of you are casually discussing the hot sauce like a pair of judges in a cooking show -straining to sound normal still feeling the burn of the King’s Ransom sauce-

Harley picked up the bottle and put a bit more sauce on her nugget and Wednesday’s as well

Harley: ready?

Wednesday: yes

They ate their nuggets as Xavier and Mr Johnson stared.

Wednesday: wow

Harley: delicious right? I mean it’s all Apollo peppers but the different ways of preparing them really makes a difference

Wednesday: yes. So spicy. My eyes are watering now

Not to be out done Mr Johnson and Xavier both ate the nuggets. Xavier put more on just like Harley and Wednesday and instantly regretted it. His eyes started tearing up and he started choking

Xavier: water!! WATER!!

Mr Johnson was trying to look cool but he was suffering

Kent: Enid, bring out more cottage cheese and orange juice

Xavier: -struggling to talk- how are you girls not struggling? That was hot!

Harley: well, I knew what to expect with those last two. I tried them when I took the challenge. There’s tomato juice you can drink

Xavier: tomato juice? Hell no!! Just get me water!!

Enid brought out the items Kent asked for. She pour orange juice for both Mr Johnson and Xavier as well as giving them each a bowl of cottage cheese. Kent prepared the final nuggets

Harley: you say this is hotter than the Last Dab I had?

Wednesday: yes. Pepper X

Harley: oh dear.

Mr Johnson ate his nugget. He immediately regretted it.

Mr Johnson: ugh. That’s terrible. My mouth and lips are on fire! - he started choking and started eating the last of the bread. It wasn’t helping. He grabbed a bottle of water. It did not help either

Xavier: -downing his nugget. Coughing then vomiting- ugh. Wednesday help me!!

Harley and Wednesday are their nuggets

Harley: ack! So hot!!

Wednesday: ugh. I regret nothing

Harley: same.

Enid: orange juice?

Mr Johnson grabbed the bottle and downed it. Kent brought out two plastic champagne glasses filled with orange juice for Harley and Wednesday and a bottle of water for Xavier

Kent: here is your water, Xavier. It won’t help. Water just spreads the capsaicin around. You’re better off with the tomato juice And for the hellions? A final toast with a glass of orange juice?

Chuckling Harley and Wednesday took the orange juice and drank

Wednesday: that was good

Harley: indeed! I did like the X Factor sauce. Perhaps if we had not had so much other hot sauce before?

Wednesday: and on something more hearty than a mere chicken nugget

Harley: Agreed. Thank you. This was fun. A very nice selection of sauces!

Kent had brought out more nuggets for everyone and more conventional dipping sauces like ketchup and ranch. Also more chips and guacamole

Everyone, accept for Mr Johnson and Xavier who remained at the tasting table feeling sick, ate and talked

[melonteee]

I think the thing that’s both odd and interesting about Zoro (especially when compared to the other Straw Hats) is that I think he’s the SH other than Luffy that I find the most difficult to articulate and map out the trajectory of. Like every other Straw Hat I feel like I can point to specific panels and go “That. That’s their damage.” But with Zoro… it’s not that he *doesn’t* have those moments, but it feels like a lot of his thematic character beats are buried in a lot subtext; and like there’s a lot of gaps.

Like I find it curious that Zoro’s the only Straw Hat whose arc didn’t take place in his home (or in the case of some later crew members a symbol of it), but he’s also the only one who has flashbacks throughout the story. Yet, even then, we still don’t know as much about him as we do others. With everyone else, you can easily answer where they slept or ate and what the relationship with the community at large was like growing up, but Zoro? The snippets we get don’t extend beyond the dojo - and the recent revelations about that only raised more questions. I can’t be the only one who thought it was weird of Oda to drop that nugget that the blacksmith in his childhood village was a pirate (or at least wanted by the marines) and then died not long after that. Or that Zoro doesn’t seem to know that he’s related to Kuina’s family at all (Zoro didn’t even know the blacksmith was her grandfather until after he died) despite only being 2 generations removed from the founding of the village. What could have possibly happened in the time between Zoro’s grandparents and parents that means Zoro - who had to have been an orphan in the flashbacks we have seen - is so far removed from his own family and the village history?

I think the other thing that’s odd about his relationship with Kuina/her death (and I think a big reason the theories that Kuina was murdered, secretly Tashigi, etc. continue to persist no matter how many times they’re debunked) is that the circumstances of her death kinda rub against other parts of the series. For instance, if you consider that “the weak don’t decide how they die” to be a through line in One Piece (not saying I do) then Kuina’s death feels like a direct counterpoint in the same way Katakuri telling Luffy “people don’t die because they didn’t want to live badly enough” does. But then, even though Zoro’s flashback on her death (which I love in the manga for how that’s Zoro’s life flashing before his eyes) ends on “humans are fragile” but then this very idea is immediately countered by Luffy the rubber man deflecting bullets; then later Zoro kinda rejects that concept of fragility in Arlong Park altogether when he declares he can’t allow himself to be killed by anything that would kill a normal human. Not to mention how in-universe there’s only theories as to what his Asura form is, which is about as far from Kuina’s mundane human fragility as you can get.

Honestly how Zoro’s character arc is laid out made a lot more sense to be when I heard Oda’s original outline for One Piece was a five year storyline. It might just be me, but it feels like there’s a few missing puzzle pieces, and I wouldn’t be surprised if Oda is saving some of those gaps in information for a specific moment.

I really appreciate this long ask and you've clearly thought a lot about it, but I don't think anything is missing with Zoro at all. Because, first off, his story does take place in his home - his home is in the East. That's like saying Nami's story doesn't take place in her home because Bellemere found her as a baby on a different island. The east is still Zoro's home, nothing says otherwise, and it's explained with Zoro just being an orphaned boy who was running from village to village looking for a challenge.

Usually you'd ask where the orphaned boy was from, but we know One Piece is just a world like that. He has a full name, his face is on wanted posters, and no one has looked for him or said they know him apart from as a Pirate Hunter. His Roronoa name wasn't known in Wano at all, and apart from his very minimal connections to the Wano family, there's nothing there that matters.

Also, all of the Strawhats stories are kinda only presented in flashbacks dfghjkdf

Oda put Zoro's story in an SBS because, to me, he's stating first and foremost Zoro's past BEFORE Kuina does not matter to Zoro. It feels Oda just made that SBS as an Easter egg people could have fun with. If Zoro were told of his parents, or his origins, why would he care? He didn't know them, it's not like he ever thinks about his mother nor seems to even remember her - unlike Usopp, Robin and Sanji. If you told Zoro he had a mum and dad, he'd probably be like Luffy and say "?? okay? so what?"

Zoro's story, first and foremost, is about the future. Because the monster trio all parallel each other in this regard. Sanji is about the past, Luffy is about the present, and Zoro is about the future. The only time Zoro's past ever matters is with Kuina, and that's because Zoro's story IS Kuina. We see it clearly with Wano, the only reason the blacksmith matters is because it connects him to Wado, which connects him to Kuina, which lets Zoro know where KUINA was from and why WADO is such an important sword to her family - and now to him.

"The weak don’t decide how they die" is a quote said by Law, that is taught to him by Doflamingo - an insanely cruel person. Law THOUGHT this was the case, but this does not MEAN it's the case. Same with what Katakuri said, we are encountering different people with different lives and different experiences. Kuina's own death, in my opinion - WHILE possibly being a murder or suicide - was meant to show Zoro that no matter what you do, or how strong you are, the world will be cruel enough to take those you love away. There's a tragedy in that simplicity, and that's all we need to know about Zoro. To me, there is no other mystery in the way he acts or the way he fights - it's all right there within Kuina's promise and death.

When Zoro learns things about the past it's about his swords, it's about Kuina, and it's never his OWN past - because, again, he is a character about the future. I cannot see him caring about parents he never knew, nor seems to even remember, nor caring about his social life around the dojo when he had one set goal in mind - which was to become a master swordsman.

Luffy was the one who introduced him to the power of bonds and love, along with the rest of the crew as they grew around him, and he grew to love them back. I don't really see any other setup for Zoro, because again, why would he care? How has it affected him BEFORE Kuina? We simply have no reason to see that, and Zoro has no reason to care about it either. The only piece missing, in my opinion, is WHY Zoro cared so much about PROVING his strength as an orphan. But that could easily boil down to...because he was an orphan, and had nothing better to do as a rowdy kid lmao.

Zoro's life is filled with coincidences, that's true, but I'd be shocked if they mattered at all? Oda also connected Otama to the Kurozumi family, but he said it didn't mean anything, it was just a coincidence.

I'm not totally opposed to Zoro having MORE backstory, I am just unsure why it'd matter when...there's nothing to answer. We HAVE the answer for why he's an orphan, and it's because pirates raided his village when he was a kid. It's pretty standard stuff, and that's all it has to be. Because Zoro only looks forward, and that's the only place he'll ever look. He's not being chained down by his past, he's being pushed by a promise, so he will run towards the future if it means fulfilling that promise.

[vilevexedvixen]

Inscryption cocktails

Each Scrybe would have a menu reflecting their three minions (increasing in size - a shot, a squat drink, then a tall drink) and then the main cocktail based off of the menu's titular Scrybe.

Each scrybe also has a dish relating to them and how they play their cards.

Thank you @dariusblake for your suggestions on different flavour profiles and placemat details.

Leshy's menu:

"The prospector"

A caramel whisky shot rimmed with golden nugget cereal crumbs. Modelled after the gold nuggets the prospector can transform cards into.

"The Angler"

A salted liquorish cocktail using anise flavouried liquior and fish-shaped gummy salted liquorish hanging over the rim of a bucket shaped recepticle. Modelled after the Angler's bait bucket card.

"The Trapper/Trader"

A rich, blood-red velvet cocktail made with red grenadine and a chocolate liquior. Served in a stein with a fake bit of pelt padding embellishing the handle. More modelled after his trading role than how he plays cards.

"The Scrybe of Beasts"

A botanical gin-based cocktail comprised of rhubarb gin, elderflower tonic and red grenadine seeping in from the top like a drop of blood, garnished with a sprig of elderflower. Served in a tall tiki mask glass (ideally etched to look like his masks, but a normal tiki glass would work) Playing into his tree-like appearance, emphasis on blood sacrifice (thematically and mechanically), and because he's an old man (hence use of elderflower specifically).

"Eight Fucking Bears"

Technically more of a food challenge than a regular dish of eight very spicy pork ribs with a thick, blood-like sauce.

Grimora's menu:

"Royal Dominguez"

A limoncello and triple sec shot rimmed with crushed sherbert. Based on his death from scurvy at sea.

"Sawyer Patel"

A stout Sheep Dog peanut butter whisky and ginger ale drink served in a tumbler lined with a dash of peanut butter drizzle.

"Kaycee Hobbes"

A refreshing blueberry vodka and fireball slushy served in a tall glass and garnished with blueberries and cinammon caramel drizzle.

"The Scrybe of The Dead"

A black forest espresso martini made with Kaluha, cherry vodka, chocolate liquior and a shot of espresso. Served in a china teacup with a pitted black cherry skewered on the teacup's rim.

"The Lord of Bones"

Fried chicken drumsticks and wings served in a coffin-shaped basket.

Magnificus' menu:

"Goobert"

Lime jelly(jello) shot. The shot glass would have little googly eyes stuck to it and an edible paper wizard hat instead of an umbrella.

"The Pike Mage"

A sweet and spicy chipotle-orange syrup, bourbon and vanilla liquior cocktail served in a martini glass and garnished with a skewered glacie cherry donning an edible paper wizard hat.

"The Lonely Wizard"

Black Sangria (made with dark wine - blackberries, black grapes and black plums) imbued with green edible glitter. Served in a wine glass and garnished with a lime slice donning an edible paper wizard hat.

"The Scrybe of Magicks"

A colourful tie-dye milkshake of creme de menthe, mint ice cream and strawberry cream liquieur embellished with edible glitter. Served in a tall flute and garnished with a swirl of whipped cream, rainbow sprinkles and a spherical marshmallow made to look like Magnificus' missing arcane eye in place of a cherry.

"Mox"

A dessert made of blue raspberry, orange and apple sorbet scoops. Sprinkled with crushed sherbert and gemstone-shaped hard candies.

Po3's menu:

"The Inspector"

A simple blue raspberry sour shot with a blue raspberry popping candy rim.

"The Melter"

A vibrantly fire-coloured chocolate orange spritz. Mixing chocolate liquieur with aperol and prosecco. Garnished with curled orange rind and dark chocolate shavings.

"The Dredger"

A boba blue gin fizz. Made of bombay sapphire gin, lemon juice blue curaçao and soda water with lemon boba. Served with a silver coloured straw.

"The Scrybe of Technology"

A bright blue bubblegum cocktail topped with sweet sparkling wine and lemonade. Served in a tall, angular glass. The most boring of the Scrybe cocktails tbh.

"Kilo-bites"

Byte-sized sharing platter of savoury pastries and square pizza slices made to look like floppy discs.

I'll be honest, I was drawing a blank for Po3's menu. Dude's Vox if Vox had self-control, which takes away a lot of vibrancy to bounce off of for flavour profiles and visual ideas.

Bonus Mycologist dish:

Roasted ox-tongue mushroom, stuffed with mushroom paté and blue cheese with a creamy but sharp cheese sauce.

Ngl, Leshy's is my favourite menu. Definitely tempted to make it, maybe for an Inscryption themed party?

[katkat030]

you 🤝 me

not being normal abt the dbhc au

YEAH. LITERALLY. Define normal because I sure as heck am NOT it. My gosh is the DBHC Ethubs brainrot strong.

sooooo as promised, quotes from my DBHC Ethubs wip :D (Edit: yeah so uh. that got a bit out of hand)

I’m the most happy with these and they probably won’t change too much when it comes time to put together the “donefinalfinal2.0take3” draft as I’m prone to naming things lol

#1

There’s a fond tilt to his lips as he cards his fingers through Bdubs’ hair, the sensation of the strands slipping through his fingers and the weight of the head pillowed on his chest grounding. It feels right, just so, a surety that seeps into his bones and nestles there. With Bdubs curled up on the grass beside him, face turned outwards and the sleepy smile tugging at his expression just barely peeking out from beneath the arm thrown over his eyes, the irony isn’t lost on him.

Dbhc Etho isn’t human, as much as he’s feeling and acting like one ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ so there’s a little nugget of angst there.

for context, they’re lying in the sun - it’s set around early season 10, maybe around when Bdubs plants the forest around his area. Seeing as Etho was made for terraforming and gardening, it would only make sense for him to be helping Bdubs out with it.

Anyway. Spending a long day in the heat to dig holes, place saplings in them and cover them over again is pretty physically intensive. So Bdubs, being Bdubs, is tired and just wants to lie in the sunshine for a bit. Who’s to say Etho doesn’t join him (he does) (Bdubs ends up lying his head on Etho’s chest)

(there’s some serious angst potential here. Bdubs missed his uh, friend, when he wasn’t around before redeviating. Maybe he cries about it. Maybe Etho has some feelings about that)

#2

“Hey, you,” Bdubs murmurs, nose crinkling as his face stretches into a yawn, shifting the arm thrown over his eyes to open them for a few seconds and squint up at where Etho stands, blocking the rays of late-afternoon sunlight.

“Hey yourself, ‘Dubs,” he replies, unable to help the amusement creeping into his tone. Unregistered emotion detected, the notification flashes, which he ignores in favour of stuffing his hands into his pockets, raising an eyebrow at where Bdubs lies spread-eagled on the ground by his feet, well-worn soil stained gloves discarded and cast off to the side. “What ‘cha up to?” 

An incoherent “Mm” is all he gets in response, and it’s a conscious effort not to huff with laughter. The half-hearted glare from Bdubs proves the challenge impossible.

He could absolutely make a game of annoying Bdubs, Etho decides, mentally noting the thought and storing it to contemplate later. “I finished fixing your saplings,” is what he opts for instead, this time receiving a longer and slightly more coherent mumble he takes to mean as a thank you, and not a get your shadow away from me as it was likely intended.

“What was that?” He teases, putting a hand to his ear and leaning down slightly, blocking the sun further. “Is it past your bedtime?” 

Bdubs scowls as a breeze sweeps past, and had Etho been human he’d be completely caught off guard as the other reaches up to yank his arm. As it is he makes a show of stumbling, catching himself before using the connection to pivot and flop down besides Bdubs on the grass, greeted by Bdubs blinking blearily up at him, one eye open and the other shut against the brightness once again unobscured by Etho’s figure. 

“If you’re going to sit here, at least lie down, for goodness’ sakes,” he grumbles, but there’s no real heat behind the words. He resolutely ignores the way Bdubs’ touch lingers on his arm before falling back to his side. Unregistered emotion, the warning flashes. He ignores that, too.

formatting on mobile is incredibly time consuming but we got there in the end :’D

(This takes place earlier in the story than the first quote but shh)

anyway! I It’s far from finished and none of this is fully edited, so there’ll probably be changes in the future!

I hope you like it <333

for anyone not familiar with the au: it’s not mine, I’m simply writing a fanfic on it - go check out Shepscapades’ master post :) the art is absolutely incredible and I cannot recommend the entire thing enough

please do not repost my writing. Everyone is always welcome to reblog though ;)

[jonathan-cranes-mistress-of-fear]

#43 What's your take on spicy foods? Please

Okay, this is my hot take for today

Spicy Foods are great, if you can handle the spice. and I think anyone could work up to handling spice, but that's something they have to want. I don't like spicy foods, for the most part. And I don't really see myself working up my spice tolerance. I can handle hot salsa and spicy chicken nuggets. that's it. (and anyone who screams "WHITE PERSON LMAO" wreaks of asshole. I am here for flavor, heat is different and just because I don't like my mouth and acid reflux killing me the rest of the day, I shouldn't be mocked.)

Spice that is pure heat should not exist for normal consumption. Spice that makes grown men cry is bullshit. Those crazy "devil horned evil beelzebub pepper hot wings" challenges that you see restaurants come up with? The ones that have a 5% victory rate and have a wavier so they don't get sued if you get hurt? The hot chip challenge that killed someone? That stuff is bullshit.

Flavor is different. Flavor is lovely. a good curry, or salsa, even a nice hot sauce that isn't meant to kill your children. that's all fine.

I will always try new things, even if it's hot. But if I can get it on a sliding scale? Yeah, mild all the way

[astrorabby]

I beat Pikmin 4 with no upgrades

Over the past couple weeks or so I've been playing Pikmin 4 again. First a normal playthrough, which reminded me of how much Oatchi invalidates what the game throws at you.

So I figured, what if I didn't upgrade Oatchi at all? Then I took it a step further and decided not to upgrade my explorer, whomst I named Terri, either. [I DID have to buy the scorch guards to enter Frozen Inferno but I unequipped it right after I entered] I hardly bought any items, just a few bombs for some concrete walls, and, admittedly i had bombs to kill the Empress Bulblax in the Cavern for a King. I can't kill her properly even WITH an fully powered dog, I'll admit.

The results were disappointing. I knew the early game wouldn't be much different, but later wasn't much harder either. The only treasure past a pup tunnel is early on and only has a weight of 3, Oatchi's default strength. I was legitimately looking forward to, say, spending twenty minutes rushing into a 4 weight treasure over and over again to push it off a ledge, but alas no such obstacle occured.

The only parts to give me trouble were later dandori chllanges, the later night missions, and the Ancient Sirehound.

The dandori challenges were interesting, the early ones were easy sure, I platinumed the first one at least. Some, like Hefty Haulway proved quite difficult; not being able to use Oatchi to pick up some slack on that crimson banquet makes it hard to even get a bronze. Cliff-Hanger's Hold requires a lot of Oatchi's abilities to smoothly take on the upper level. Even a midly upgraded Oatchi comes in handy in Oasis of Order to immediately move the love nugget behind the start to get some extra whites, or to get the poison bulborb and/or the foolish fruit across that small creek, freeing up the wingeds to get the materials ASAP.

Speaking of whites, I actually used White Pikmin in more than one spot. I typically buy the poison armor for Oatchi ASAP, making whites very redundant, and with the onion confined to a special challenge unlocked after beating another special challenge, I often don't want to risk my white min. Since I never got the poison armor, I had no choice but to use the whities liberally; I was still very careful with them. Often restarting a whole floor upon losing just one.

The Night Missions weren't too kind. The early ones were fine and really no different, but the two in the Primordial Thicket were tough. Particularly the very final one, Autumnal Gully. Oatchi cannot glowmob, and with no upgrades, his rush doesn't stun. And you can't leave Oatchi alone for long, he will still autoattack, and with no armor or HP upgrades he dies near instantly upon a lumiknoll attack. Plus, one of the progg eggs seems to be inaccessible so I'd have to take on that progg no matter what. I resolved to collecting as many pellets as I could, getting to about 70 glow pikmin, leaving Oatchi on the blue lumiknoll and Terri on the orange. Terri being on the orange was imperitive to stun the baldy long-legs that approaches it. With plenty of spicy-spray it turned out not so bad, but it took way more concious planning than any night mission did with upgrades.

Then came the Ancient Sirehound. As I always do, I abused glow pikmin for this fight; glowies for the hazards, purps for the tail. The ice phase always give me trouble, trying to run to his tail with those snowballs rolling is a pain. But the breath wasn't a problem, until now. Get rolled into the breath and your pikmin are frozen, Oatchi is frozen, you're…not frozen. It does enough damage to kill an unupgraded explorer in one hit. Oatchi just barely survives.

The electric phase is a lot tougher, you can't just mosey on through the beams, you gotta dodge and jump them while making sure your glow pikmin go where you want, which with targeting isn't usually a problem until it randomly auto-targets the Sirehound, but many people have [rightfully] griped about the auto-target in this game so I'll spare you.

Fire phase was pretty normal. Even with the scorch guard i'd instinctively jump over the waves of fire…only this time it matters if I miss. But that didn't happen much.

Progg phase is always frustrating. The lack of HP and armor upgrades doesn't make a difference, sure you die in fewer hits but touching that stuff always kills so many pikmin its basically always a reset, anyway.

I didn't platinum the dandori challenges. I may attempt to but it may not be possible for some. Oatchi throating the banquet in Hefty Haulway seemed imperative for that one when I platinumed it, for instance. I didn't do the Sage Leaf because it's impossible to avoid Moss upgrades in the shipwreck tale, though I may do it for the sake of it. Who knows, maybe I'll find a way to do the shipwreck tale without even discovering Moss.

[shikisai-san]

Filling the prompt for the HCS bingo: DND AU!

May and Steven are part of the same adventuring party. Steven is the flashy paladin, probably to a god of justice like Tyr, or another Good or Lawful-aligned god. May is a Fighter with a pretty basic backstory but who can do anything with a weapon and will use anything as a weapon. Steven, who though himself the epitome of courage and literal knight in shining armor, is sometimes in awe of this perfectly normal small woman who challenges gods with a chicken nugget because it's the right thing to do.

This art only features the main ship but we had plenty of ideas with @thoughts-of-a-bibleophile, @seasaltmage and other discord friends! ^^

Here are some things we thought of for other characters:

-Ranger Brendan. He's bff with may, she's the better combattant but he's very good at survival and getting along with animals. He'd be a Beastmaster ranger who asks the help of any animal around rather than just sitcking to one.

-Wallace is Lore bard, with a lot of water spells. Lizia is a Glamor bard, being hot runs in the family I guess.

-Warlock Zinnia? Her extremely Chaotic Neutral self goes along with Steven the Lawful Good Paladin about as well as it does ingame.

-Maybe Wizard Wally. If Magus were still a class (they were a melee wizard that could infuse their magic to their weapons) the Magus Wally. He has the bravery to want to be melee and properly join the fight but the poor boy has like a score of -2 in Constitution...