#Lucy Makes a Few Extra Dollars

[voxslays]

HAZBIN MEN AS DADS

Featuring >>> Adam, Alastor, Angel Dust (Anthony), Lucifer, Husk, Vox, & Valentino x Reader (Separately) as fathers.

(not proofread if that wasn’t obvious lol)

Adam:

Total boy dad. I can see him with a little girl, (let’s be honest, his daughter would 100% become an exorcist and take over after he retires as commander (if he ever retires lol)), but he would turn his son into the the next exorcist commander.

Adam is definitely a bit misogynistic…and no matter what you do, atleast a little bit of that would be passed down to your child. If Adam had a son (not him already having two other sons…), he would start training him at a very young age. (Kinda like the career tributes from the hunger games if yk what I mean. (Oh, you don’t? I don’t blame you lol. Idk what I even meant by this tbh. Don’t worry about it-))

With a girl, I can 100% see him being overly protective TO THE EXTREME. He’s the type to scare off teenage boys lol.

Alastor:

Is probably the best dad on this list (except for Luci ofc.) Is super protective of his family. Would not let your baby out of his sight for the first few weeks. Would offer to help you with the baby when it wakes up crying late at night.

Is totally a girl dad. He would willingly play dress up and have tea parties with her in her room…but it will not be mentioned outside of there. When going out for an outing, he would dress her up to match his colors—red & black—and give you a few extra minutes to get ready.

The two of you want some alone time? He’ll ask Rosie. If she’s busy he is forcing either Husk or Niffty to watch the child. Alastor also most definitely keeps your young, innocent child away from Angel Dust for ‘reasons’ he doesn’t want to elaborate on. Your child will inherit his powers and will be almost as strong as him one day!

Husk:

Okay…so first of all, the elephant in the room. His alcoholism. I don’t think Husk would completely stop drinking, but would tone it down for the sake of you and your child. When he’s drinking/drunk, he would make sure he wasn’t around your child, not wanting that kid to see the ‘real’ him.

He would totally be a girl dad. He would completely deny it but we all know it’s true. Like Alastor, if your daughter wanted him to dress up, have a tea party with him, etc. I think it would take a little more convincing than Alastor but in the end he would do it.

Would be overly protective. ESPECIALLY AROUND ALASTOR. Husk would make sure that your child was atleast six feet away from the deer demon at all times. Husk obviously has lots of experience with Alastor as a person, so he of all people knows that Alastor could (and maybe would???) manipulate his spawn into a deal.

Angel Dust:

Angel is extremely excited…but…He is nervous. VERY anxious.

Angel would be a good dad, but he is worried about his deal with Val. Who knows what Val would do if he found out he was in another relationship…let alone with a child! When the child in question is born, he does everything in his power to hide them from Val.

If Val found out, he would be pissed. After calming down (barely), he would try to get your child under contract to punish Angel. Therefore, Angel is obviously very protective. Angel would teach your child how to be street-smart and survive on the streets of hell. Your child would learn from Angel’s mistakes.

Lucifer:

WHAT? HES GONNA BE A DAD (again)!? He is so stoked. Before the baby is even born they have everything they could ever want. Anything for his little duckling.

Your child would be homeschooled, but not by you. By the most well-known and well-educated members of Hell’s society. Your child is truly getting a million dollar education. Oh! And if your child decides to get a higher education after high school? It’s already taken care of. Lucifer makes sure that there are schools ready to take your child to college before your baby even turns two!

For some characters, I feel like they would either be girl dads or boy dads, but Lucifer could truly be either. With a little girl, I could totally see him playing dress up or Barbies with her, no problem! With a boy, same thing.

Vox:

Your child hit the jackpot. I mean…who wouldn’t want the richest overlord in all of pride to be their father? I just pray the kid doesn’t come out looking like a leapfrog or iPad…

Your child would be an iPad kid (vPad?) They would have all the newest technology and toys, they wouldn’t even know what to do with it all! Seriously though, this kid 100% has a playroom just filled with all the toys Vox either made or bought for them. He definitely spoils them (and you).

Your kid is a nepo baby. As they get into their teenage years, Vox would make sure they started to gain fame. Whether it’s by singing or acting (or both), or becoming a powerful overlord like himself, Vox would help them reach that.

Both you and Vox would make sure that your baby is supervised around Val and Velvette, if Vox even lets the kid around Valentino. He does NOT want Valentino trying to swindle them into a deal.

Valentino:

Bestie...What were you thinking? Let’s be honest. Valentino would not be the greatest dad. Definitely not the worst, but not great.

He would 100% leave your kid unsupervised. You’d better always be watching because he definitely isn’t. Speaking of supervision, Val would just randomly bring your child into his studio…When the two of you are spending ‘time’ together, he would either get Vel or Vox to watch the baby, or one of the souls he has under contract. Is surprisingly overprotective.

Val would teach make sure your child knows Spanish, threatening to ‘disown the brat’ if they refused. Luckily, you are there to stop Valentino from going off on your baby. Your child definitely learns a few Spanish swears from him.

TYSM FOR 1K NOTES GUYS! I really appreciate the support. As of now, this is my most liked post ever. I’m glad you guys enjoyed it so much! Thank you! <3

[strangespinapple]

BW ~ My Love

Bruce Wayne x Fem Reader

blurb: you and bruce are childhood sweethearts. you love him and he loves you. there is nothing you guys wouldn’t do for each other. but between you being 7 months pregnant with his baby and bruce’s late night activities, you’ve been missing him a lot. so tonight instead of falling asleep and seeing him later on, you decided to stay awake and give your husband a relaxing bubble bath. 

warnings: SMUTTT 18++ MDNI - fluff - pregnancy - soft!bruce - sarcasm? - cursing - bullying - marriage - love - childhood trauma - mentions of death - mentions of virginity - bad/mean boy but soft only for reader troupe 🥹

word count: 2.3k

a/n: the way i've been in my bruce wayne and billy loomis era is CRAAZYYY, definitely more coming soon!

honorable mention: @devilfic. she is one of my favorite writers and i love her Bruce Wayne fics. she is also one of many writers who have inspired me to write. pls check her out if you haven't already! enjoy :)

You and Bruce are childhood sweethearts. Going to the same middle school as the soon-to-be mayor’s son, you saw first hand how cruel people can be. You always made sure to show kindness to him. To let him know that not everyone in this world is heartless. After the death of his parents, the bullying only amplified, and Alfred decided it was best to homeschool him. You were sad that your best friend would no longer be going to the same school as you. But that didn’t stop you from being there for him and seeing him everyday. Never would you have imagined that your childhood best friend would fall for you and make you his wife 12 years later. 

You are currently two months away from giving birth to his son. Bruce has been working extra hard in his day and night job. He promised that he will take a few months off to care for you and the baby. You love Bruce so much and he loves you. That’s why you are filling a soothing bubble bath for him to sit in. It’s 5:30am and the sun is starting to rise in Gotham city. While waiting for the bubble water to fill the tub, you pour a glass of wine and a glass of sparkling cider. Normally Alfred or Lucy (Bruce’s maid) would do this for you but with acts of service being your love language, this time you wanted to make it extra special for him. 

You make your way upstairs as quickly and quietly as your legs can carry you, trying your best to not ruin the surprise. You put the two glasses on the counter in the bathroom so you can scatter rose petals around the tub. Lucy has helped you pick them from the garden, a new hobby you had picked up to fill all your free time. You start to light all the candles you had placed around the bathroom to add to the romance. Turning the water off as now the tub was completely filled, you took one last glance around to make sure everything looked perfect. And it sure as hell did. 

The sound of the bedroom door opening and closing made you feel excited. 

“Honey?” Bruce called out for you. 

“In the bathroom!” 

His heavy footsteps against the hardwood floors can be heard coming towards you. As he walks through the threshold it’s as if time stopped for the both of you. Bruce has always been a very fit, tall and undeniably attractive man. It’s one of the many things that made you fall in love with him. But with him standing there shirtless, still dripping with water from his shower, it made your mouth water. And these pregnancy hormones were not helping either. 

Ever since he found out you were pregnant, he built a shower and changing station inside of the batcave to limit the amount of noise and movement he’d bring to the bedroom. He didn’t want to disturb you and the baby with his mental boots and foul smells after being trapped in leather all night.

Bruce was just as turned on as you were. Seeing you standing there round and swollen with his baby in a purple lacy lingerie nightgown makes his pants feel tight. Beautiful long brown shiny legs and arms that he would bet his last dollar would feel so soft against his skin. Big boobs filled with milk about to pop out of the silk fabric. Your box braids in a high braided ponytail that laid flat against your left shoulder, framed your beautiful chocolate face to look more natural and ethereal than you already look. He could eat you up right here right now and not give a single fuck. 

Taking a look around the bathroom and seeing how stunning it looks, he wonders how he got so lucky to have such a beautiful caring wife. Bruce looks you in the eye with such devotion it makes your heart swell. 

“What do we have here?” He says with a smirk on his face as he walks towards you. 

When he gets in front of you his hands gravitate to your waist, as you wrap your arms around his neck. 

“Well, I wanted to do something special for you. Something that you wouldn’t see coming.” 

Your smile is art in its purest form for Bruce. He leans down and plants a soft but passionate kiss on your lips. You kiss him back with so much love. The kiss begins to get hot and heavy. You can feel his prominent bulge against your upper thigh, making you more wet than you already are. Placing your hands on his chest to push him away, Bruce looks at you like a starved man with a pout on his lips. 

“I’m supposed to be pampering you, not being seduced by you.” While smiling at him Bruce takes one of his hands and slaps your butt. He takes a deep breath through his nose to calm his hormones down. 

“Okay, whatever you want mamas. Where do you want me?” 

“I need you to take your pants off and get in the tub.”

“Can you take me to dinner first before you try to get in my pants?” He side eyes you while smiling. One thing many people didn’t know about Bruce is that he has a funny sense of humor. Something only you have been privileged to witness. 

You put your hands on your hips and a giggle leaves your lips. (A/N: didn’t mean to rhyme here but just call me DR  Seuss heheh) 

“Get in the tub Mr Wayne” Smiling at him you move one hand to your belly.

“Well of course Mrs Wayne”

Bruce pulls down his sweatpants along with his boxers allowing them to fall to his ankles. His muscular body looks like it was sculpted by God himself. You simply couldn’t help but to stare in awe of him. He steps out of them and makes his way to the bubble bath. Getting in the tub one leg at a time he sits straight up in the bath with the bubble water hitting his mid-waist due to how tall he is. 

Forcing yourself out of your trance, you grab a loofah and lather it with his favorite body wash. Slowly getting down on your hands and knees right beside Bruce, you glide the loofah against his broad strong shoulders and upper back. Cuts and bruises litter across his entire body but you make sure to give a little extra love and care to each and every one of them. 

“Baby you don’t have to do this. I should be taking care of you in your condition.”

“But you always take such good care of me. I want to make you feel as special as you make me feel. Baby or no baby, I can do this for you.” You kiss the side of his face lovingly. Moving to the right side of Bruce to start washing up and down his right arm, Bruce puts his left hand on top of yours. 

“Join me.” His eyes are dark with emotion. You couldn’t tell if it was lust or love or maybe a little of both. 

“Bruce. This is supposed to b-“

“I know I know but trust me, feeling your body sitting perfectly on top of mine IS taking care of me.”

He puts his pointer and middle finger in the shape of legs and walks them seductively along your lower arm. His normally blue eyes, now a gray stormy color, stare deeply into your brown eyes making you incredibly wet. 

“And more importantly it will make me very, very happy.” How could you possibly deny this man anything?

Pushing up on your hands and knees you stand up straight. You throw the soapy loofah into the sink and immediately start stripping. Bruce stares intensely up at you as your hand pulls the straps of your nightgown off and it instantly drops to the floor. 

“Oh you’re trying to kill me.”

With your growing bump in the way it makes it uncomfortable for you to wear sleeping pants and especially underwear. Anyone else would’ve made you feel like a piece of meat, with the way Bruce was eyeing your naked body up and down. But instead, he made you feel so loved and appreciated. Many women would kill for their husbands to look at them the way yours is doing now, let alone wanting to touch them.

“Come here. I need you baby.”

Getting inside the tub, you straddle Bruce. His hand immediately goes over your ass and back up to your hips, moving you back and forth to get you all hot and bothered. A soft moan leaves your lips. Moving the bubbles out of the way, you grab his penis and begin to stroke him back and forth. Bruce’s head falls back hitting the rim of the tub with an audible whine. Thick veins run up and down all 9 inches of him standing hard, with an angry red tint to it. 

You are Bruce’s first and he was yours. When you guys were graduating from high school, he decided to stay home and take over Wayne Enterprises as well as begin his journey as Gotham’s vigilante. While you on the other hand went off to college in Central City. Bruce thought that he wouldn’t be able to have relations with a person, given all that his life entails. So he asked you if you’d be comfortable taking his virginity as it is the one thing he didn’t want to miss out on. Being the best friend you are, you could never say no to Bruce. Also because you were secretly in love with him. How could you not be? Bruce is intelligent, tall, funny, muscular, has ocean blue eyes you can get lost in, and a deep and mysterious voice. He’s always been so attractive. Still to this day women throw themselves at his feet, willing to do anything and everything to be with him. You were more than happy to give Bruce an amazing first time, and that’s exactly what it was. It was so good that he was constantly on your mind at school. He absolutely ruined any chance of you being with another man. And when you tried to sleep with other men nothing came close. Bruce felt the same way about you. Every time you are intimate with Bruce it reminds you of your first time with him. 

Bruce lifts his head up and his hazy eyes meet yours. Not being able to wait any longer, you lift yourself up onto his throbbing cock. Sliding downwards, Bruce’s hands on your hips help guide you as your back arches. Both of you let out pornographic moans into each other’s faces. 

“Fucking hell.” Feeling you squeeze the life out of him, Bruce buckles his hips up into yours. 

“OHH Bruce” 

You rock back and forth on his cock while he pounds up into you. With arms around him, you tug on the hairs on the nape of his neck. Pulling his hair has always been Bruce’s weakness during sex. Bruce wraps his arms around your waist and holds you down as he jackhammers up into you.

“MOMMY I CAN’T—“

“FUUCKKKK”

With him hitting that perfect spot inside of you, you lose all restraint and moan while coming hard on his cock. Due to overly sensitive pregnancy nerves, you end up squirting. Your legs shake and your pussy clenches the life out of him. Your moans are music to his ears and it pushes him over the edge. His eyes roll to the back of his head as he grunts. His cock swells and spurts of his cum fly into the deepest parts of your uterus. Knowing that if you weren’t already pregnant, you’d definitely be after this. 

Breathing heavily against one another, you and Bruce feel a rush of love and content in your hearts. You pull away from Bruce and stare into each other’s eyes. 

“I-”

Taking the words right out of your mouth “I love you so much”

You smile at him. 

“That’s what I was gonna say” You lean down and kiss him as if it is the last time you’re going to see him.

He moans softly into the kiss and then breaks it. You turn around in the tub to sit back against Bruce’s chest. He wraps his arms around you and rubs your belly lovingly. You lay your head back against his strong shoulder. You look up at him through your lashes and study his beautiful face.

“Have you thought about a baby name yet?”  He says looking back down at you.

“No, have you?”

“Nope. But I have faith in you to pick a good name for our baby. You're going to be an amazing mama.”

“Awe honey, you’re so sweet.” He smiles from ear to ear and kisses you sweetly. 

He has always loved it when you called him sweet pet names. It helps heal his mommy issues, one name at a time. 

“What do you think about Dick?” You pull away and hand his glass of wine to him while holding yours in the other hand.

“Mhmm I don’t know.” He takes a sip of wine.

“I guess when we meet him we’ll know.”

Another smile slowly creeps up on Bruce’s face. Seems like ever since you came back into his life, he’s been smiling a lot more. He cups your face with his other hand and moves his thumb back and forth. He stares into your eyes wondering what he do to get so damn lucky. You are the light at the end of the tunnel. The sun that shines after a harsh thunderstorm.

An amazing dream he never wants to wake up from.

[deathbyhertouch]

Morning hcs with the boys

Mornings with JB

When you wake up before her, those are your favorite mornings bc she looks so cute when she’s asleep

She is always in the most dramatic position, arms flopped all over the place, or she is completely in starfish pose

When you can eventually lull her out of her sleep, you always spend an extra hour in each other’s arms, enjoying the peace

You enjoy the way the sun illuminates her features, making her look more ethereal (as if that’s even possible)

Her morning voice is a lot lower, usually because of the grogginess but you find it adorable, possibly calling it her tough guy voice

She may not admit it but she loves when you spend time tracing her tattoos with your fingers, finds it very soothing

Loves it when you both are free to cook breakfast together (i’m a firm believer that she doesn't do a lot of the cooking, just puts on the coffee and keeps you company, or will scramble the eggs if anything)

Lazy mornings are her favorite because that usually means neither of you have to put on adult clothes just yet, she thinks you look so cute in her shirts and a pair of boxers

Mornings with Pheebs

I like to think that Phoebe would be a stomach sleeper, but she will be asleep with her face buried in your chest

So if you have to pee, you risk holding it for a while or waking her up 

Always has a part of her body touching a part of yours (hands on your arm, fingers gripping your thighs, etc)

Would sacrifice her first born if it meant you didn’t have to get out of bed for the day

She loves to wake up to see your face, eager to see your eyes looking into hers already

She’ll lean over and leave tiny kisses all over your face before pulling you in for a long kiss

“I’ll give you a dollar to put the coffee on…. perhaps two?”

Absolutely loves morning sex, she can’t think of a better way to start her day off with you

She’s going to take her sweet time worshiping your body in the morning sunshine

Mornings with Lucy

She is up before you most days, loving to watch you in peace

She loves to run her fingers up and down your back, watching you snuggle into her side

She loves to dote on you in the mornings, getting your juice for you, toasting a bagel for you

On the weekends, she will try her best to get you up early to go to the farmers market together; “c’mon babe, i don’t want all the good stuff to be gone so fast”

She likes to shower with you in the mornings, taking her time- washing your hair, scrubbing your body with her fave body wash, warming up a towel for you in the dryer so you are content the whole time

You can’t help but admire how thoughtful and careful she is with you, truly enjoying her presence

You like to help her get ready as well, helping her pick out clothes to match yours, helping her with her hair

On the other hand, you will try to distract her as much as possible by lingering behind her, running your hands up and down her back, kissing her neck-anything to help her come back to bed and enjoy each other just a few minutes more

[paceywittters]

Chenford + 18 please!

chenford + things you said when you were scared

"So I'm right," she won't meet his gaze even though he's trying to catch hers. She busies herself with folding and re-folding the blanket thrown over the bottom corner of her bed, the one he'd put on her side for the nights when she gets cold and needs an extra layer (which is all of them, really). Her fingers fumble the corner once, twice, again. "You seriously don't think I can do it."

She hates herself a little for it.

She hates herself a little for everything lately, if she's being honest. There's this feeling in the back of her throat she can't get rid of, a tickle that's causing her to say things she doesn't want to, that's goading her on to be the worst version of herself because she can't not. If she's going down, she's dragging everyone with her. Is that dramatic? Sure, but she's never claimed to be anything less.

She sees the twinge in Tim's eye and something in her stomach soars, surges, squeezes. She's got him.

This is stupid, her rational brain tells her. You're self-sabotaging. Tim loves you. He believes in you. Stop picking fights with him because you're–

Shut up, she tells her rational brain, which apparently is the only part that doesn't have an issue listening to direct orders.

"Lucy, we're not doing this." His teeth are grit and his neck is tense. She can tell he's actively trying to soften his face, not to look stern and defeated in the way she knows he would if he wasn't aware of what she was doing. She would hate herself for doing this to him, but she decides to hate him a little bit for not calling her out on it instead.

"Doing what?" Her tone is snappier than she intends it to be, but it works in her favor.

He sighs deliciously. "This. This. We're not having this fight that has no point – either you believe me or you don't."

Lucy rolls her eyes, chewing on the inside of her cheek as the silence floods between them.

Usually, the silence is comfortable. The silence is nice, even, while she folds her laundry and he reads through a file, pretending he's not struggling to see the text without the dollar store pair of cheaters she'd tucked away in his desk a few months back when she'd noticed how far away from his face he was holding his phone.

They don't talk and they don't have to, because she knows every tiny movement Tim's jaw will make while he reads gory details, because he knows every ClipTalk trick she'll use in order to fold a fitted sheet without asking for help. They don't need words to know what the other is thinking, what they'll do next, when they need each other.

Today, the silence is overwhelming. She ignores the piece of her that aches for him and swallows it down – partly because it doesn't matter, partly because she doesn't want it to.

She leaves the blanket in a lopsided lump on the edge of the bed and crosses her arms. "I'd believe you if you were believable," she offers, shrugging. "If you don't think I can do better a second time, you can just tell me. I'd rather know the truth than have you pretend to support me again."

Tim rolls his eyes. "You know what," he starts, but shuts his eyes, shaking his head. "I'm not giving you what you want here."

"Oh, I know," she huffs, a dry laugh escaping her throat. "Trust me."

Tim squints at her, then stands up, rolling his sleeves up slowly. She watches, tipping her head to the side. At least he looks nice. "Enjoying the show?"

"Immensely," she deadpans, then purses her lips and lets herself meet his eye. He's staring her down and she swallows hard. "What?"

"What are you getting from this," his voice is lower, softer. She rips her gaze away and shakes her head. "Lucy, come on – you don't get to use me as a punching bag because you're scared you're going to fuck up ag-," he stops himself, but the damage is done.

She shuts her eyes, turning on her heel and heading towards the bathroom. She's not upset, honestly – she's kind of relieved, revitalized, ready to rub it in his face. At least he's being honest, this time. At least he's not pretending he's not disappointed in her. "See?"

"That's not what I-," she shuts the bathroom door behind her, muffling the sound of him. He knocks on it softly. "Baby, come on."

"Do not," she nearly growls.

She hears the light thunk of his head leaning against the door and she takes a step away from it, bristling at the sound of him sighing out a slow breath. "You don't think you can do it. You don't, and you know that." She doesn't answer and he sighs again, this one louder. "Talk to me, would you?"

"Go home," her voice is on the tip of her tongue, surprising her when it comes out firm, strong, certain. She hadn't known she wanted him to go home. She's not actually sure she does.

"What?" He sounds genuinely confused. Lucy ignores the fact that part of her mind is racing around, searching for ways to keep him here and get him to convince the rest of her mind to leave her the fuck alone. "You want me to go?"

She doesn't give herself the chance to think about it. "Go," she says again, firm, "home, Tim."

He waits. She knows this game – he'll count to ten, then twenty, then thirty. If she doesn't tell him to stay by the time he reaches sixty, he'll leave her be. It's fucked up that she knows, she realizes. It's fucked up that there's a pattern to this at all.

She swallows, then glances over at her shower and taps her fingers against the door lightly. He taps back. He's got to be somewhere around 35, by now.

"Please go home," she repeats, and it sounds different. A little raw, a little real. "I just want to be by myself, okay?"

He's quiet. She huffs. "Are you going to answer if I call later?"

She surveys her thumb nail, then bites the loose skin on her cuticle gently. "Maybe," she mumbles.

"Are you going to snap at me again?"

"Probably."

"Wow," he sounds a little annoyed, but mostly bemused. "Honesty for once."

She groans, but he doesn't laugh. She hears the floor creak beneath his feet as he makes his way back into her bedroom, then through the kitchen, then out the front door. The lock turns and the hum of alone silence falls over her as she leans back against the door and shuts her eyes.

He didn't say goodbye. She files it away, another thing she can pick a fight over later if she needs to.

She ignores her rational brain, screaming for her to figure this out before she ruins the most important relationship in her life. She'll ruin it if she damn well wants to, thank you very much.

The alone silence, the silence she wanted, doesn't feel as good as she'd hoped.

[ladylooch]

Imagine Nico taking his little girl to the rink everyday while mom is a way (bachelorette or sister vacation), and she’s just having so much fun, she watches her dad and uncle jack practice, has lunch with them and hangs out with jack while nico goes into meetings/does recovery stuff

she wants to come to work with dad everyday now!

Normally, Timo watches Lucie and vice versa with Lio and Nico, but both hockey players are on the same schedule today. So, Nico calls in the ultimate reinforcement in Jack Hughes.

“Jacky, you were really fast today. Can you race around the ice with me? I want my hair to blow in the wind.” Lucie flips her brown locks out, causing chuckles from both Jack and her dad.

“Lu, I’ve got some stuff to do. You’re going to hang with Jack, okay?” Nico says as he takes his helmet off. “Thanks, man. Lexi and Emma are on the Bach trip and I didn’t know what to do today.” 

“No prob. We will have fun, huh kid?” He extends his glove for knucks.

Jack takes Lucie back onto the ice and they skate around for a bit until Jack wants to pass the puck back and forth. Lucie immediately gets bored and begins to make a few snow angels on the ice.

“You could be pretty good at hockey if you cared.” Jack chuckles, helping her back onto her feet. “Where is your cuz today?”

“With grandma and grandpa.” Lucie says.

“And you’re not?”

“His other ones.” Lucie giggles. “We have two.” 

“Ohhhhh is that how it works.” He laughs. “Hey, sit tight here. I’m gonna go change.”

“Can I have two dollars?” She asks, causing him to pause. He shrugs handing her the bills out a few minutes later.

“Wait. What are you going to do with it?” He turns to ask. Lucie is already gone, making Jack nervous. He changes fast and sighs in relief when Lucie has returned, sitting on the bench and… putting on tattoos. 

“Look at this one.” She shows him the blue butterfly. “I want it on my cheek.” Jack shrugs, helping her hold the thin paper there and peeling it away. It's temporary, so what is the harm?

“Nice!”

Lucie, seeing the extra ground he is giving, begins to play him like a fiddle.

“My daddy said I could have Skittles while I wait for him.” 

“No, daddy always lets me watch YouTube videos on his phone.”

“I’m cold. I need hot chocolate.”

“Can we go to McDonalds?” 

“Sure.” He says, standing up, suddenly feeling tired.

Lucie pops a handful of skittles in her mouth as Uncle T walks by, double taking at her with Jack. His eyes scan over the empty candy wrappers, hot chocolate, and butterfly tattoo on her face.

“LuLu.” He starts laughing as she grins, showing him her colorful teeth. “You’re gonna be in it.” He says to her in Swiss German. “Him too.”

“Yeah.” She starts laughing harder, slapping her knee. “But daddy will go easy on me.”

When Lexi comes home from her trip, Lucie proudly proclaims that she's going to work every day with daddy to hang with Jacky. Lexi thinks otherwise. Her face tattoo is turning out to be a little more permanent than Jack thought it would be.

"You and Jack get into too much trouble. Next time, you're with Lio and his grandparents." Lexi looks over at Nico who shakes his head in astonishment.

[papermoonloveslucy]

LUCY’S DINING GUIDE

The Restaurants & Eateries of the Lucyverse ~ Part 3

 Eating out brought Lucy to a wide variety of dining spots: sit down resaurants, diners, cafés and lunch counters are all here – in Lucy’s Dining Guide!

Bradshawe Building Coffee Shop 

The Unique Employment Agency was located in the Bradshawe Building in Los Angeles, which had its own coffee shop, complete with counter service, booths, and tables. The eatery was featured in several episodes. Sid Gould played the regular waiter. 

Yang Sing Ching  ~ “Lucy’s Birthday” (1968)

Kim and Craig take their mother out to dinner at a Chinese restaurant. The (unseen) proprietor is named Irving. They even have matzoh ball soup on the menu. The waiters sing “Happy Birthday” to Lucy in Chinese. 

Pierre’s Restaurant ~ “Lucy’s Working Daughter” (1968)

To help Kim with her new job at a dress shop, Lucy turns fashion model, crashing a luncheon sponsored by Modern Miss Boutique.

The Theme Room at LAX ~ “Lucy and the Great Airport Chase” (1969)

The Carters have lunch at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) inThe Theme Room (later named Encounter), a circular restaurant located atop the iconic Theme Building. 

HARRY: “That was an excellent meal. Those were the best sand dabs I’ve ever had.”  

The Brown Derby ~ “Lucy and Johnny Carson” (1969) 

After playing Stump the Band on “The Tonight Show” Lucy wins a dinner for two at the Brown Derby. There she runs into Johnny and Ed McMahon.  In an homage to the classic “I Love Lucy” episode also set at the Brown Derby, Lucy manages to cause a tray of drinks to be spilled on Carson. 

Murphy’s Pizza Parlor ~ “Lucy and the Generation Gap” (1969)

The episode opens with Kim, Craig and their friends planning the school musical at a pizza place operated by an Irish Asian named Murphy Irving Wong (Victor Seng Yung). 

Café George ~ “Lucy and Wally Cox” (1970)

Lucy agrees to meet the son of Harry’s friend, Wally, who is afraid of girls. Harry also meets his father and old friend Moose at the same restaurant. 

Cafeteria ~ “Lucy Competes with Carol Burnett” (1970) 

Lucy and Carol meet at a cafeteria for lunch, where they plan to enter the Secretary Beautiful Contest representing their respective workplaces. 

Café ~ “Lucy and Jack Benny’s Biography” (1970)

Lucy recreates all the women in Jack Benny’s life. In the second flashback, set in 1915, Jack is in the navy and is smitten by Zelda (Lucy), a waitress at a café. 

The Red Devil ~ “Lucy and Ma Parker” (1970)

Lucy impersonates a femaile master criminal, confronting mobsters Joe Grapefruit and Muggsy at the Red Devil, which is mostly a bar, but also serves grapefruit!

Chez Moi ~ “Lucy Stops a Marriage” (1970)

At a French bistro, Lucy spies on Harry when he dines with Laura Trenton (Jayne Meadows), believing he is headed to the alter. Harry order imported champagne - imported from Fresno!  

Waikiki Dining Room on the S.S. Lurline ~ “Lucy Goes Hawaiian: Part 1″ (1971)

Lucy volunteers to assist Harry as cruise director on a ship bound for Hawaii. Viv, Kim and Craig come along. Although recreated on the Paramount lot, the ship was real, as was the Waikiki Dining Room. 

Country Club Restaurant ~ “Lucy’s Bonus Bounces” (1971)

Harry meets his analyst Dr. Cunningham (Parley Baer) at the Country Club for lunch. Cunningham orders an iced tea and Harry has half a cantaloupe - which he absent-mindedly pours catsup on! 

Harry’s Favorite Restaurant ~ “Lucy Makes a Few Extra Dollars” (1971) 

To teach Harry a lesson, Lucy takes Harry to lunch and has Kim wait on him. She is making 40 cents an hour. Lucy orders a hamburger and iced tea. Harry’s usual is a salad - which Kim spills all over him - deliberately. She then dumps an ice cold glass of iced tea in his lap! 

Chasen’s ~ “Lucy and Eva Gabor are Hospital Roomies” (1972)  

In the hospital Gabor’s assistant Walter (R.G. Brown) brings Gabor's dinner on a silver tray. He says it was prepared especially for her by Chasen's, a real-life West Hollywood restaurant frequented by entertainers. It first opened in 1936 and closed for good on April 1, 1995. Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz were regulars and had their own private booth there. Although it is mentioned, no scenes are set there. 

Schwab’s Drug Store ~ “The Case of the Reckless Wheelchair Driver” (1972)

Kim says she saw Billy Joe Jackson (Jim Bates) at Schwab's. Schwab’s Pharmacy was a drug store located on Sunset Boulevard and was a popular hangout for wannabe movie actors from the 1930s through the 1950s. Schwab’s also had a soda fountain serving ice cream and light meals. It is Hollywood legend that actress Lana Turner was discovered at Schwab’s. Schwab’s closed its doors in October 1983 and five years later was demolished. Schwab’s was mentioned on “I Love Lucy” in “Lucy Wants to Get Into Pictures” (1955). 

Hotel Showroom ~ “Lucy and Donny Osmond” (1972)

Lucy’s niece Patricia (Eve Plumb) is a Donny Osmond fan. He is performing at the Hotel Showroom where he later orders a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a glass of milk, even though the chef reccommends the escargot (snails). As a souvenir, Lucy takes the menu... and the ashtray... and the matches... and the flowers... and the vase... and the sugar cubes! 

Persian Restaurant ~ “Lucy and Her Prince Charming” (1972) 

Lucy is dating a handsome man (Ricardo Montalban) who turns out to be royalty. When Harry finds out that the Prince is in love with Lucy, he'll stop at nothing to get the two married - including masquerading as a fortune teller during their date at a Persian-themed restaurant.     

Villa Roma  ~ “Lucy’s Last Blind Date” (1973)

When Harry finds out his cousin Ben (Don Knotts) is rich and single, he wants Lucy to go on a blind date with him. 

BEN (to Lucy, about the menu): “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but this is all in a foreign language.”  LUCY: “It’s Italian. You kinda have to expect that in a restaurant called the Villa Roma.”

Much of the episode also takes place at the Bradshawe Building Coffee Shop (see the first entry above). 

The Proud Penguin ~ “Lucy and the Franchise Fiasco” (1973) 

The Proud Penguin is a frozen custard stand on Citrus Boulevard across the street from the Los Angeles Zoo. Lucy and Mary Jane are partners in the business, The episodes also features scenes set in the Bradshawe Building Coffee Shop and on the dining terrace of the Westland Country Club, where a dinner of a whole albacore tuna is destroyed by baby penguins!  

Refreshment Stand at Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum ~ “Lucy and the Big Game” (1973)

Lucy and Harry recieve tickets to a football game between the USC 'Trojans’ and the University of Oklahoma 'Sooners’. Two visiting team fans (Cliff Norton and Al Checco) pass by singing the title song of the Rodgers and Hammerstein musical. Although the Coliseum is a real place, the gate area was recreated on a Paramount soundstage. 

Restaurant ~ “Lucy and Andy Griffith” (1973) 

Lucy has coffee with Andy Johnson (Andy Griffith) to talk about his work with underprivileged youth. In the next scene, Kim and Harry meet at the same restaurant and sit in the same booth!  The red booths used in the episode were also seen in the Bradshawe Building Coffee Shop.

Dirty Jack’s Paradise Café ~ “Where is My Wandering Mother Tonight?” (1974)

While staying with Kim at her new apartment, Lucy decides to give her and her boyfriend some alone time and visits a nearby tropical-themed café where she drinks coffee and talks to the owner (Jack O’Brien). The famous red booths are back! 

 Harvey’s Welcome Inn ~ “Lucy Fights the System” (1974)

To prove that a waitress Mary was let go because of her age, Kim goes undercover as a new hire. She deliberately turns the restaurant upside down to prove how capable Mary was. This is the last episode of the series. Fittingly, Harry gets a pie in the face. 

“I knew it would end like this.”

[billysgirllol]

“so what i’ve told you earlier, just didn’t register. it didn’t count. i didn’t talk highly of you?” she snaps, about how she forgave him and that she was proud of him and all those sweet things said after she kissed him. all of that… JUST didn’t count. there he was again… saying he’s NOT hiding anything from her. now maybe she was becoming confused, feeling defeated, her mind feeling like she was going insane, running in all these circles to try and figure out if she was just imagining all of this. that maybe billy taupe just scarred her, keeping her extra paranoid now and she was just wrongfully treating billy this way because she was afraid of getting hurt again. “how would you feel if you already were findin’ me actin’ weird and then i hurried up and shut off my phone. you’d want to, too.” but sure… he can stay there acting like he wouldn’t. “it wouldn’t have to be.” an interrogation— if she hadn’t found reasons he’s saying doesn’t EXIST to question him.

“i’m SORRY, then.” words come off short this time. "i'm sorry for havin' so many problems, too." as HE puts it. feeling bad she must have a habit of being as toxic as jesse when it comes to apologizing. nose starts to tingle, her cheeks starting to glow warm. not in total anger this time, but for a multitude of reasons. feeling like her mind was being played with, feeling wrong for having these suspicions, feeling bad she had quite a few problems according to him, feeling bad she was paranoid because of how billy taupe had acted just like this and was seeing other girls behind her back, feeling guilty she could actually be accusing him of nothing. especially at the part he’s now accusing her she’s doing this all on purpose and his words: trying to make him feel awful about himself.... that finally tips the scale, breaks the dam, a rush of tears blurring her vision until she blinks and they run down in streams over her blush pink cheeks.

her throat tightens and her heart speeds up before flight responses kick in, slipping under the table and crawling out on the other side. she forgetfully leaves her mittens and coat behind, pulling out the ten dollars out of her sweatshirt’s pocket and giving it to the waitress. “this is for you, darlin’. tip money. and i hope you know you have a wonderful smile.” she does, it’s sweet and she feels so guilty letting her paranoid ideas turn her into a bad person. the older woman is happy, surprised, smiling as she whirls around but confused and then sad all at once when she notices the younger has tears rolling down her face and she’s frantically leaving as fast as she came. lucy gray busts out of the sticky glass doors like a bird flying off in the wind, the painful arctic air stinging her face, regretting immediately not grabbing her coat and mittens. but she wasn’t daring going back for it, she’d freeze out here in this dark parking lot first. running away aimlessly in the middle of virginia, trudging through the thick snow that was freezing her bones and hurting her fingertips in frostbite quick, even if she had intentions to find the target parking lot. she couldn't help an overload of emotions had her running distraught.

“no, you don’t. it feels like you don’t see any good in me. i haven’t given you any valid reason to assume that i’m doing something terrible behind your back. all you’ve got against me are your own insane suspicions.” billy has a feeling that he most likely should just confess to being with other women while in new york, but at the same time, why should he come clean when she refuses to tell him with whom she’d lost her virginity. it’s such an important piece of information, and she’s being stubborn, secretive and unfair. “for the last time, i’m not hiding anything from you, lucy gray. am i supposed to make something up for you to be content? i don’t understand why we can’t just spend a nice evening together without fighting over imaginary issues.” his cheeks remain flushed, but his tone changes subtly, growing more confident, more persistent. he figures his girlfriend might stop harassing him if he doesn’t sound so lost and weak, like he’s got all his sins written across his forehead. “how would you feel if i randomly grabbed your phone, went through it and then claimed you’d been acting weird and must be hiding something? would you be okay with that? or would you stand up and walk out?” an exasperated sigh escaping billy’s lips, pale blue eyes growing stormy. “you’re turning our date into an interrogation.” he can’t help but wonder why she’s so persistent in the first place. if he told her all the things that she’s apparently dying to know, she’d most likely be upset. she’d probably want nothing to do with him, and he can’t lose her… “this is your problem, too. you don’t know how to apologize, should have just left it at i’m sorry. the rest comes off passive aggressive.” his stomach lurches into his throat, making him feel nauseous and dizzy. he should be begging her for forgiveness. instead, he’s lying and hiding things from her, and trying to make a victim out of himself. if that ever comes out, he doubts she’ll ever forgive him. “and here we go again… you’re seriously trying to pick a fight or make me feel awful about myself tonight, aren’t you? i don’t condone any form of abuse. i’m nothing like olinger. i’m not one of them. and i understand why you don’t want me around them.” but he also thinks that she should try and put herself in his position — jesse has been his friend ever since he can remember… he can’t just cut him off.

[elsecrytt]

Devil Day Pop Quiz [Math + Venting]

emotionally damaged by how the pop quiz rewards work. it's loot boxes. it's basically fucking loot boxes. tons of rng. it's completely possible to get just items as rewards and never actually get ANY cards. basically, each box has 250 items in it. you spend 500 pop quiz points to randomly unlock ONE item. So effectively in order to guarantee finishing a loot box, you need 500*250 points - 125,000 points. 125k points, FOR ONE BOX. Typically the demon SSR (Simeon's surprise, in this instance) has been available at 100k points - about the number of points a f2p player can obtain throughout the ENTIRE event. Now, this system DOES mean that it is theoretically possible for a lucky player to get everything with very few points. If your luck is exceptional, you can finish a box early... or if not, you will have to spend close to the entire 125k to finish the entire box. Certain items are only present in certain loot boxes, including the UR cards. The SSR is in the first box, then an SSR Voucher in the second, the memory UR in the third, and the demon UR (the dia card) in the fourth. And finally there is a UR Voucher in the fifth box. To get the demon UR for certain, you will need 125,000*4 points. 500,000 points. For the Dia UR. Yes, this is the worst case scenario of luck. However, each loot box you open, your chance of getting the correct item is 1/250. That's .004%. The odds of getting a UR from the current nightmare are .5%, or OVER 100 TIMES HIGHER. The above is something I said in the original post, and it's not correct math!!! Very sorry to have spread misinformation like that, I was tired and unhappy, wasn't checking my work. Your odds are 1 in 250 - that's true. And 1/250 = .004 However, when you calculate percentages, you don't just take that decimal number from the division. If your odds are 1 in 100, they should be 1%. 1/100 = .01 Therefore, your odds of getting the item you want ON YOUR FIRST ROLL (this is a very important point I'll elaborate on in a different post) are .4% So you are more likely to get a UR card in your nightmare, but not as much as my hack job fever dream math made it out to be. Just to give you a perspective on the mathematics behind this. I've taken plenty of math classes but it's been a while and I am not at all well versed in gatcha, so anyone with greater knowledge feel free to enlighten me lol. (ty for the person in the replies who corrected me <3) normally, a f2p player with a little foresight (some D-energies and diligence in unlocking everything) can get 100k points, netting them the demon SSR. and if you ARE willing to spend some money - on extra battles, or on cheat cards from the respective nightmare - then you can feasibly get the memory/demon UR without breaking the bank entirely. Usually, it's around 300k points. this pop quiz? it's loot boxes. it's just fucking loot boxes. just what this game needed, right? even MORE rng, to make it so that even IF you were to spend over a hundred dollars on this damn mobile otome, you could come out with literally nothing to show for it, because you got unlucky with the boxes. it's rough, really rough. i'm not f2p and i've never really been - i can't IMAGINE how f2p players must be feeling about the pq Dia and Luci URs. anyways, hope that was informative to some, I just had to get some of that off of my chest and all. NOW I WILL ADD A NOTE. The current pop quiz isn't complete, and the pop quiz will, supposedly, run for 20 days. This means the total number of points that even a f2p player can get should be much higher than 100k. A lot depends on how many chapters will be in part 2 of the second pop quiz, and other information we'll only really get once the second part launches. What's important to remember also is that the rewards for part 1 and part 2 use the same points, but, to my knowledge, they cannot be mixed and matched. If you get through box 1 and 2 for part A, and move on to part B, you still have to get through box 1 and 2 of

part B.

[ask-duotale-b2fc]

[REDACTED] BLACKBERRY

Other Names: Shortstack, Shortie, Mole, Blackie, Senpai, Fox, Meanie

Age: 15 (During the comic) | 25 (Currently)

Gender: Male

Height: 3'1/95cm(15) | 4'5/135cm(25)

Sexuality: Whatever Frisky is.

Soul Type: ❤️ Determination

Fluent in: English | Spanish (LA) (Beginner)

Birthday: August 13, 2269

Zodiac: Sun in Leo, Moon in Gemini

🫐~~~~~~🫐~~~~~~🫐

Likes:

White chocolate | Baking | Anything sweet tbh | Cinnamon | Pumpkin spice (... the flavor) | Christmas | Halloween | His Blackberry Shampoo Hair Dye | Musicals | Singing (Shocker lol) | Blue (Color) | Purple (Color) | Anime (Adventure/Fantasy) | Video Games | Libraries/Books | Writing | Westerns | Movies (Horror/Science Fiction)

Dislikes:

His dad | Anyone named Jerry or Dexter | His real name | "Dollar Store Bin Quality" video games | Romantic Movies | Dark Chocolate | Bitter Food | Frying Pans. | Frisky's antennae | Silver Crosses | Fire | Spray Bottles | His Natural Hair Colour

Stats:

Powers:

Charm(🦇) | Float/Flight(🦇Not Mastered) | Immortality(🦇) | Telepathy(🦇 With Luci & Frisky via Blood Bond) | Blood Bond(🦇) | Teleportation(🦇 Adult Only, can't do it properly) | Age Rejuvenation(🦇) | Transformation(🦇🦊 Kitsune form; Vampire wise, only small creatures by Adulthood) | Illusion Magic(🦊) | Fire Magic(🦊) | Health Rejuvenation(🦊 | VERY slow. Practically useless.) | Save/Load (❤️)

🫐~~~~~~🫐~~~~~~🫐

Extra:

♥︎Runs away from home constantly as a kid and goes to the orphanage. Eventually decides to just live there. He feels safe there.

♥︎Real name is known only by him, he refuses to say.

♥︎Lowkey a$$hole to people he doesn't know or like, especially to Flowey.

♥︎His ego is big so he'll try to 1-up anyone who claims to be a better than he is at anything. He is nice if you ignore/don't trigger pre-mentioned ego.

♥︎Has some knowledge of monsters thanks to library books and cartoons. After living in the Underground, he quickly learns more about them, including the written language.

♥︎He only fights if the enemy strikes first. He will protect others... unless death is unavoidable in which case he will stay down and pretend to be dead in hopes that he will be left alone.

♥︎Has an extreme fear of snakes and tentacles thanks to his dad. Frisk's hairs do not help.

♥︎Owns his own bakery in Snowdin and is very skilled in the sweets department. Plans to put Muffet out of business every day.

♥︎Can't make decisions to save his life

♥︎Can't tell if you're flirting with him unless you do it constantly. Easily flustered once you get under his fur, though.

♥︎Can draw very well, especially on cakes. However, his hand writing can be compared to that of a doctor.

♥︎He's a very good singer. If you can keep him from yelling the lyrics. He majors in Musical Theatre in coolleg.

♥︎His tail moves on it's own but only when he wears the hoodie. Even he doesn't know how this works. He assumes it's magic.

♥︎Speaking of his foxy features, he turns into a fox when he gets too emotional. Without the collar, he turns into a giant uncontrollable beast if angry or depressed.

♥︎There are a few words he can't say. The most notible one being "Cinnamon" , which he says and spells a variety of ways. (Cimminin, Cimmonin, Ciminimin, etc)

[dccomicsimagines]

My Business - Clark Kent x Reader

Requested by Anon -  A superman x reader imagine with the prompt: "I found your nose! It was in my business."

Requested by warblinglion0  - Hi! Could I request a Clark Kent imagine please??

***

Clark closed his eyes against the blowing snow. He flew over the city, using his super hearing to guide him. The city was quieter than normal. The snowstorm had shut almost everything down. 

He sighed, swooping down to help a woman carry home groceries. “Thank you, Superman,” she shouted once she was at her building. Clark waved at her and took off into the sky again. 

Most of his day was spent helping stranded people with the storm. He had already written his article about the impact of the storm on Metropolis’ sewer system. Perry could forgive boring content when the storm created a slow news day. Clark snorted. He bet Lois found some kind of amazing story in this weather. 

He landed on the top of the Daily Planet. The cold air felt sharp in his lungs. It reminded him of winters at home. He looked out at the snow covered city, thinking of turning in. A cup of hot chocolate while watching that documentary he felt would give him an edge in a story he was researching. He felt warm already. 

“Get lost, jerk.” Your voice hit his ears. Clark’s eyes widened in surprise. It was like he was subconsciously listening for you sometimes. Your voice always came to him in the moments he never suspected. 

He floated into the air, searching for you. You sounded too close to be at your apartment across town. 

“Stupid, country bum,” a man’s voice echoed near you. Clark heard a door slam. He flew faster before slowing when he found you trudging through the snow in the street. His stomach dropped at how underdressed you were. You didn’t even have a coat on.

He almost flew down to you, but he stopped himself. People couldn’t see Superman around you. Too risky. He quickly flew to his apartment only a block away. Changing into regular clothes, he made sure to pick up an extra coat for you before zooming back to you. 

***

You wrapped your arms around yourself and cursed your situation. Why didn’t you bring a coat? Why did you decide to go the the club during a snowstorm? You shook your head, feeling the snow settled on your head. Everything was shut down. You shivered, crossing the street to make the long walk home. 

“(Y/N)? What are you doing out here?” Clark’s voice made you jump. You spun around, seeing him run over to you. Ironically, he was dressed for the weather. Funny since he couldn’t feel the cold. “Where’s your coat?” He had an extra coat over his arm, which he quickly wrapped around you. You slipped your arms in the sleeves, noting how warm it was. 

A shaky laugh escaped you. “I found your nose. It’s in my business...again.” You tapped his nose before struggling to zip up the coat. Your fingers were already numb, burning from the cold. Clark shook his head, smiling as he zipped it for you. 

“Come on. It’s too far for you to go home now. My place is nearby.” He wrapped a strong arm around you and led you home. “Now why are you out in this weather?”

He was so warm and his big frame blocked the wind. “Well, I got invited to a club by some friends of Lucy’s.” You bit your lip. “I thought I’d go, but then one of the guys started making fun of me when I didn’t know what...” You stopped yourself from spilling the embarrassing conversation. “Never mind.” 

“You’re always getting in trouble.” Clark unlocked his building’s front door and held it open for you. You hurried inside, stomping your feet to knock off the snow. Shivers rocked your body, you could have swore ice was forming on your body. 

“And you’re always popping up to help.” You rolled your eyes. “I never would have thought my good old brother, Pete, would ask you to keep an eye on me so much. Do you two even talk that much anymore?” 

“We do.” Clark bit his lip. Pete Ross didn’t call him that much, but they always caught up when Clark went home for a visit. It was actually during one of those visits that Pete asked Clark to keep an eye on his younger sibling who got it into their head to move to Metropolis. Pete thought you were in over your head, and honestly, most of the time you were. 

You pulled Clark’s jacket closer as you both headed to the elevator. “I mean there was that time where I was in that bad roommate situation, so you helped me move. Then I wanted to rent that one place for really cheap and you stepped in to show me how bad it was. Of course, then you came in with that offer to live with Lucy Lane in a nicer part of town.” 

Clark blushed slightly. “Well, it’s the least I could do. I mean you’re practically family, (Y/N).” 

Your stomach soured slightly. You were afraid he only saw you as Pete’s little tagalong sibling. Who could blame him when you felt so helpless most of the time? “I personally think it’s because you want to make up for breaking up my mud mask business in the fifth grade.” 

He laughed hard, almost doubling over. “You were taking mud from the pond and mixing it with your mother’s perfume. It made three people break out in hives.” 

“I had a warning label on it.” You smiled at his reaction. “And it was five dollars a bottle.” 

Clark shook his head. “Ma actually bought one from you. She didn’t use it though. In fact, I think she still has it sitting in the garage.” 

“Too bad for her. Lana swore by it. Said it cleared up her acne just like that.” You snapped your fingers, chuckling along with him. The elevator doors opened and Clark led the way down the hall to his apartment. 

“In all seriousness though, you shouldn’t have went out with a storm on the way. The city shuts down during snowstorms.” Clark unlocked his apartment door and pushed it open to let you in first. 

“The club was still open.” You wandered inside, flicking on the lights to take in the bland surroundings. The only personal items were a framed newspaper article and three family pictures of the Kents. 

“Stupidly still open, yes.” Clark shut the door and locked it. “I’ll make some hot chocolate. Make yourself comfortable, (Y/N).” He took off his coat and shook it out before pulling off his shoes. You kept the coat on, still warming up. 

Clark went into the kitchen and you trailed behind him. “Were you as helpless as me when you first moved here?” you asked suddenly as you took a seat at the counter. Clark blinked, turning to look at you while he turned on the stove. 

“Yes. I had no idea what I was doing and I had a few tricky situations myself.” He smiled. “I’m glad I can help you not to make the same mistakes I did.” 

You hummed. He turned back to start warming up the milk. “Of course it was easier for you. Being Superman and all.” Clark flinched, looking at you with wide eyes. You laughed at the sight. “I know. I know. We’re not supposed to talk about it. It’s the thing we know, but never speak of.” 

Clark sighed. “I don’t think that made it easier for me.” He cleared his throat, turning back to the stove. “It was hard to hide my powers. To have some much noise around me all the time. Not to mention when I decided to become Superman.” 

You watched him, noting the tension in his shoulders. Part of you wanted to go hug him, but you resisted. You didn’t know how he would react. “I remember the first time we knew for sure that you were something special. It was during winter break one year. You, Pete, and Tommy Johnson were trying to go ice fishing at the lake. I followed you because you wouldn’t let me come and I was being stubborn.”

“You fell through the ice because you walked on the thin part.” Clark hummed, getting out the chocolate mix. 

“No one would have noticed, but you heard me scream.” You crossed your arms. The chill from the freezing water felt like a permanent scar every time you thought back on that day. “I went under the ice and I couldn’t find a way to get out.” 

“I dived in after you.” Clark mixed in the chocolate slowly. You wondered if he was remembering how cold the water was too, even though he didn’t get cold. “I had to break through the ice once I found you. Pete and Tommy ran over to help. I let them pull us out. Tommy couldn’t believe I broke through the ice, but Pete told him it was thin there too.”

“None of us said anything about it, but you did save my life that day.” You took a deep breath, slipping off your chair. Taking off his coat, you were finally warm enough. “We always knew, but never really talked about it. I remember I tried to ask Pete to ask you to lift this big rock for me and he slapped my face.” 

“He slapped you?” Clark spun to you, staring at your cheek like Pete just slapped you right this second. You chuckled and touched your cheek. It had stun a lot. You cried at the time.

“Pete was protecting you. Like I said it’s the thing we all knew, but never talked about.” Your face burned at the concern on his face. “I’m fine, Clark.” 

Clark bit his lip, turning away to grab two mugs out of the cabinet. You snorted when you saw he had a superman mug. “Ma gave this to me. She thought it was funny.” He handed you a filled mug and turned off the stove. 

“It is if you know.” You took a sip, licking your lips. “This is good.”

“Thanks, I learned from the best.” Clark took a sip of his own hot chocolate. “I was going to watch a documentary for work if you want join me? Otherwise, we can just watch regular TV, I’m not picky.” 

You headed into the living room and made yourself comfortable on his couch. “The documentary is fine. I like learning.”

“I bet Mrs. G just rolled over in her grave at that.” Clark laughed. “I remember how you made her so mad that her face turned completely red like she was going to burst into flames.” 

“Good times.” You laughed, relaxing as Clark sat down beside you. Shyly, he grabbed a blanket and covered you and himself with it. You hesitated before cuddling into his side.

Clark paused. You saw a mixed expression of emotions cross his face. “You comfortable?”

“Yep.” You took another sip from your mug. Clark relaxed and turned on the documentary. The two of you snuggled while the snowstorm raged outside.

***

The next morning, Clark was startled to hear eggs frying in the kitchen. He slowly got out of bed and was about to leave his bedroom until he remembered you. Quickly, he pulled on an old Smallville High t-shirt. No reason to scare you with his bare chest. 

You were in the kitchen. Clark stopped in the doorway, his breath taken away. He had forgotten he had given you a shirt of his to wear. You turned when you heard his gasp. “Good morning.” You waved innocently before turning back to the stove. “I hope you don’t mind that I made us breakfast. I figured it was the least I could do since you let me stay here last night.”

“Well, I wasn’t going to send you out into the storm.” Clark sat down at the table. His body threatened to burst into flames. Why did you look so good in his shirt?

“You could have flown me home.” Clark watched you as you made a plate for him. He almost groaned at how domestic it was. Part of him wished you could be here every morning. However, the other part of him knew you were Pete Ross’ sibling. Off limits.

Clark cleared his throat. You set the plate in front of him. “Thank you.” He dug into the food to distract himself from the racing thoughts. 

You laughed and made a plate for yourself. Clark tensed when you sat down right next to him. “So it’s still snowing outside,” you said, picking at your food.

“It is.” Clark glanced out the window at the winter wonderland outside. “I’ll have to insist you stay here.”

“Oh, you wouldn’t have to insist.” You met his eye, winking at him. “But what are we going to do all day long?”

Clark took a big bite of eggs. His heart fluttered at your wink. “I do have to write an article, but after we could...I don’t know...maybe break out that game we used to play?”

“You still have that? And you have it here?” You gasped, clapping your hands. 

“Ma sent it to me a year ago. Said I might need it.” Clark chuckled. He avoid mentioning that Ma only sent it after she found you out were moving to Metropolis. Come to think of it, Clark wondered if Ma knew something he didn’t. Then again, she always did.

You went into a story about when you all first played the game. Clark listened, remembering it himself. You, Pete, and Clark played the game for the first time in the basement of his house while there was a tornado warning. A warm fuzzy feeling came to his chest. Clark decided then and there that he would call Pete once you went home and ask him for permission to ask you out. 

[queenxxxsupreme]

Baby Steps (dad!Arthur Morgan)

A/N: I know the techniques used in this story are wrong and should not be used I.E. using a male companion goat for a foal as they can be aggressive towards the foal, but this is purely fictional so just ignore it! Max is a part of the family and he is there for comedic relief! This is not for informational use! This is entertainment only! 

Warnings: None! just fluffy! 

This is a part 2 to Unlikely Choice which is here! But it’s also sort of a part of the dad!Arthur series I’ve unintentionally started....

***

The feeling of someone brushing their fingers over your hair woke you up. 

“Mornin’, pumpkin.” Arthur’s voice came from your left. He was laying on his side facing you, keeping himself occupied while you slept. 

He had been up for a while now. His struggles of sleeping had followed him from his life as an outlaw. He was lucky to get four hours some nights. 

“Mhmm.” You turned over to face him, keeping your eyes shut. You were still half asleep and you didn’t mind staying that way. 

“You goin’ back to sleep on me?” He chuckled softly, propping himself up on one elbow. 

“If you don’t mind, Mr. Morgan.”

“Well I do mind, Mrs. Morgan.” Arthur dipped his head down to kiss your forehead. “I’ve been up for a while now. Been thinkin’ about a lot. I don’t wanna think anymore. I need you to distract me.”

You sighed, opening your eyes to see him looking down at you. 

“A distraction, huh?”

“That would be appreciated.” There was a teasing glint in his blue eyes. 

“I’m sure it would.” You giggled. “What’s been goin’ through that head of yours?”

You reached up to brush his hair back. The blonde strands were getting a bit long and fell across his forehead. He’d need a haircut soon. 

“Little of this…. A lotta that.” He laid back on the bed, eyes finding the ceiling. 

You scooted as close to him as you could get and put your head on his shoulder. 

“Thinkin’ about how I’ve gotta fix the floorboards to the hayloft. They ain’t safe and I don’t want Daisy gettin’ hurt.”

“You can’t do that by yourself, can you?”

“Nah. I’ll need a couple extra hands.”

“I can help. Whatever I can’t help with, I’m sure Charles would be more than willing to come over and lend a hand.”

“Of course.” Arthur’s hand found the small of your back. “Also been thinkin’ bout a couple other odds and ends around here I gotta fix up.”

You looked up at him, sensing that there was something else, something he wasn’t saying. 

“Anything botherin’ you?” 

“Nothin’ you gotta worry about, pumpkin.” Arthur shook his head. 

“Well I’ll worry more if you don’t tell me.” 

Arthur was quiet for a few moments, lips pressed together in a firm line. 

You sat up and leaned back on one hand. You placed your hand over his heart, brows drawing together. He put his hand on yours, giving you a little squeeze. 

“I don’t want to have to worry so much about you both.” His voice was quiet. “This is our home. Don’t like feeling like we aren’t safe.”

“You’re still thinking about Micah, aren’t you?”

He sat up against the headboard. 

“Arthur, last we heard he was in Reno. We don’t gotta worry about him until we hear he’s closer.”

“I don’t want him any closer than Reno. Last we heard that was a few months ago.”

You looked down at the blanket that covered your legs. You smoothed out the material.

“Just…. Just want to be able to raise Daisy and any others we might have without him loomin’ over my head.” Arthur ran his hand over his face. 

“You want more?” You asked, your voice quiet as your eyes flickered up to meet his.

“Well…. I think it would be nice to try for one more, if you want. Only if you want.”

You moved around to straddle his thighs. 

“Daisy’s just…. She’s a dream, pumpkin.” Arthur placed his hands on your hips. “Still is. Sweet girl.”

“She’s definitely daddy’s girl.”

He smiled proudly. 

“Hey, maybe we could have a boy?” He suggested, blue eyes sparkling with excitement. “Even it out a little. One for you, one for me. I think it’d be nice.”

“Sure would be nice, but we don’t get to pick.”

“I know.” He nodded. His thumb on your hip began to trace circles in the material of your chemise. “Whatever we’d have, I’d love ‘em the same. Another girl would be cute too.”

“You’re adorable.” You leaned in to kiss his lips but just before you could kiss him, there was a knock on the door. 

“Mommy? Daddy?”

Arthur let out a soft sigh, moving his hands from your hips so that you could remove yourself from his lap. You settled on the bed next to him, leaning against his shoulder.

“Come on in, sweetpea.” 

The door opened and Daisy walked in. Carson slipped past her, jumping up onto the bed. Arthur gave him a pat on the shoulder. 

“Good boy, Carson.”

“Good morning, sleepy head.” You greeted Daisy with a smile. “It’s a little early for you to be up, hon.”

“I want to go out to the barn.” She climbed up onto the bed and clambered across your legs. 

“Oh, I reckon it’s far too early to go to the barn.” Arthur teased her. 

“Nuh-uh! You and Papa Hosea are always up early and outside in the barn!”

“What are you so eager to go out to the barn for anyways?” He brushed a few pieces of her hair back behind her ear.

“I wanna see my horse.” She admitted bashfully. 

Ohhh. I see.” Arthur nodded. “Well, why don’t you give me and momma here a few minutes to get out of bed and get dressed. Is Papa Hosea up?”

“Yeah he is. He’s out on the porch.”

“Go on out there with him. Have him take you to the barn while I get up.”

“Okay, daddy!”

Daisy was off of the bed and dashing out of the door in the blink of an eye. Carson was right behind her, eager to start the day. 

“Today is a busy day, Arthur Morgan.” You patted his thigh before getting out of bed. “John and Abigail should be here with the kids before noon. I was thinkin’ of invitin’ Charles and Lucy over too.”

“Of course.” Arthur nodded his head. He threw his legs over the side of the bed and rubbed his face. “Hey, pumpkin?”

“Yes, my love?” You turned to look at him. 

“You know I love you, don’t ya?”

A smile tugged at the corners of your lips. 

“I know. You gave me a baby girl and this beautiful house.” You moved around the bed to stand between his legs. “Love you too, you know.” Your arms slipped around his neck. His hands brushed along your thighs as he smiled up at you.

“Wouldn’t have her without you.” He leaned forward to kiss your stomach. 

“You’re feelin’ awfully sweet this morning.” You brushed your fingers through his hair. “Anything else on your mind, cowboy?”

“Just my girls.”

***

Arthur kept his hand on the small of your back as he walked you out to the barn. 

“Hey, you think we should get Hosea a mule when Silver Dollar finally croaks?” He teased as he pushed the barn door open with his shoulder. 

“Don’t you be talkin’ crass about my horse, Arthur Morgan.” Hosea spoke from where he sat in the barn. He was on a stool outside of the stall Daisy’s horse was in. Daisy was on her knees at the bottom of the stall reaching through the bottom of the fence so she could pet the foal. 

“I didn’t expect you to hear me, old man.” 

“Silver Dollar’s outlived a lotta things.” You looked over to Arthur, giving him a little smile. “Doubt he’s gonna go anytime soon.”

“When he does, I’m not gettin’ another horse.” Hosea shook his head. Almost as if happy about his owner’s statement, the Turkoman at the end stall whinnied and stuck his head over the stall door. 

“Then how the hell are you gonna get around?” Arthur moved to greet Silver Dollar. “Hey, boy.”

“I’ll figure it out when the time comes. But you know what I am gonna do? I’m gonna invest in sheep.”

“Sheep?” Arthur repeated. “Don’t we go enough of those?”

While they carried on their conversation, you moved towards Daisy. 

“Have you picked out a name yet, Daisy?”

“Haven’t thought of one.” She frowned, rubbing along the filly’s back. 

“Come on. Let’s go in and keep her company.” You opened up the stall and walked in. 

Daisy followed behind you, sitting down in the straw beside the filly. 

“Well, does she like anything? Any treats you give her?”

“She likes the carrot pieces we gave her last night.”

“Really liked them.” Arthur leaned over the stall, folding his arms along the top as he looked down at you both. “Carrot’s a cute name, ain’t it sweetpea?”

“It’s a silly name.”

“Yeah. But hey, it’d fit right in with what I call you and momma.” He chuckled. “Sweetpea, pumpkin, and Carrot.”

“You’re silly!”

“What names do you like, Daisy?” You asked her, reaching out to pull a piece of straw from her hair. 

“I don’t know.” 

“Well what name do you got in your head, silly?” Arthur reached down to ruffle her hair. 

Daisy giggled again, reaching up to grab his hand. 

“In that storybook momma read me the other night, there was a girl named Piper in it.” 

“Piper, huh? Piper is a neat name.” 

“I like that name.” You looked down at the filly and rubbed her nose. “I think she’s a pretty girl.” 

“You think she could be a Piper?” Daisy asked. 

“Oh, definitely. Don’t you think the same, daddy?” You looked up at Arthur. 

“Piper suits her well.” 

“Now only if we could get the damn thing to walk.” Hosea muttered from his seat. Arthur sent him a glare. 

“Why do you think she won’t walk, papa?” Daisy looked over to him, a frown etched on to her lips. 

You looked up at Arthur, who rubbed his eyes. 

“It’s hard to tell, honey.” Hosea rubbed his neck. “But she looks like a strong one. I’m sure she’ll be walking in no time.”

“Can we make her walk?” Daisy’s eyes found you. 

You opened your mouth to answer but found that you didn’t know the right thing to say. You looked up at Arthur. 

“Yeah, sweetpea. Let’s give it a try now. She ate well last night. Should have some energy in her.” Arthur pulled open the stall door. “You go stand out with papa, Daisy.” 

“Okay, daddy.” 

Daisy moved out of the stall and instead peered through the fencing. 

“You wanna give me a hand, pumpkin?” He held his hand out for you. 

“Of course. Just tell me what you need me to do.” 

Arthur pulled you to your feet and brushed off your skirt. 

“You know how we had that calf a few winters ago that wouldn’t listen to me but loved you? Try to encourage her to get up.”

“You think she’ll listen to me?”

“It’s worth a try.” 

“Has she stood up at all?” 

“No.”

“Thought you would’ve learned by now not to trust greasy conmen, Arthur.” 

“Shut up, Hosea.” Arthur muttered. 

You took a piece of apple from the bowl Arthur brought into the barn and knelt down in front of Piper. You put the apple piece in front of her nose, letting her get a little nibble of the treat before pulling it away. 

She tried to follow you by stretching her neck but that only got her so far. 

“Come on, girl.” Arthur encouraged, giving her flank a little pat. “Gotta get up.” 

She lifted herself up on to her front hooves as if she wanted to stand but that was where she stopped. 

“Good girl.” You rubbed her head and let her nibble on the apple a little more. “Sweet Piper. Just a little more, sweetie.” 

“Come on, Piper!” Daisy anxiously spoke from outside of the stall. 

Piper looked like she was ready to stand up, but at the last second she seemed to give up and her front legs buckled. She fell back to the ground, whinnying and flicking her ears. 

You stood up, putting your hands on your hips. Arthur watched you from where he was knelt down behind Piper. 

“Whatcha thinkin’ bout, pumpkin?”

“Max.” 

“Oh no.” Arthur stood up, shaking his head. “That goat is not teachin’ this horse any bad habits.”

“He won’t teach her nothin’ but maybe to walk.” 

***

Max was a Saanen goat that you kept on the farm with a handful of other goats. 

Max was a handful to deal with. He was mischievous and liked to stir up trouble wherever he could. His favorite activity to do was harass your husband. Max was sweet and nice to you and Daisy. He just didn’t like many people. 

Max followed you to the barn, bleating loudly for attention. 

“I don’t think this is a good idea.” Arthur muttered, blue eyes carefully watching Max as he trotted through the barn. 

“Just trust me.” You put your hand on his arm as you opened the door to Piper’s stall. 

Curious, Max followed you into the stall. Once he saw Arthur was in there, he bleated and scratched his front hoof against the floor. 

But then Piper let out a high pitched whinny, catching Max’s attention. The goat’s ears perked up and he redirected himself towards the foal. He bleated, sniffing curiously at Piper’s leg, and then he bounced around and dug his head at her flank. 

“What’s he doing?” Daisy asked. 

“I think he’s trying to get her to play with him.” Hosea rubbed Daisy’s shoulder. 

Piper placed her front hooves on the ground and whinnied once more. Max bleated. 

With bated breath, you watched as Piper stood up on shaky long legs. Daisy almost clapped her hands but Hosea stopped her, not wanting to spook the animals. 

Max sniffed Piper and then took off out of the stall. 

Piper watched him leave, ears perked up as she listened. 

“Well. That could’ve gone worse.” Arthur said. 

“She’s standing up!” Daisy exclaimed. 

Piper moved around a little, her knees shaking as she explored her stall. 

“When can I start to work with her? Like you did with Poncho?” Daisy’s question was directed to Arthur. 

“Baby steps, sweetpea. We can’t work her too hard.”

But daddy-!”

“Daisy.” You cut her off, keeping your voice gentle. “Don’t raise your voice at him.”

She frowned, looking down at her hands. 

“Maybe in a week or two, sweetpea. Gotta make sure Piper’s good on her feet.” Arthur patted the foal’s flank. 

The filly whinnied, then dipped her nose into the bucket of water in the corner of her stall. 

“I’m gonna go start breakfast.”  You told Arthur. 

“I reckon I’ll go down and see if Charles is up. See if he ain’t too busy and wants to give me a hand with the hayloft.”

“Okay. Be safe.” You leaned in to kiss him. He kissed you gently and chastly, placing his hand on your side. 

“I’ll let you know before I leave.” 

You nodded and turned to exit the barn. 

Arthur watched you leave, then his eyes flickered down to Daisy. 

“Daddy? You think I can take her out to the pasture? Maybe she wants to get some sun.” 

“Yeah, sweetpea. You can go out there with her. S’long as you’re careful and don’t get behind her when she’s standin’.” 

“I’ll go out and watch her.” Hosea offered, moving away from the stall. “Let you get some work done. Make yourself useful.”

“So you get to sit on your ass while I do all the hard work?” 

“Precisely.” Hosea chucked. 

Arthur shook his head, a grin pulling at his lips.

Taglists:  @doggone-cowgirl @winterwolf @lauramb7 @caraqas @bluscryn @krenee1drful @zodiacaldust @nonodino @gabstaroc @cal-lifornication @thefirelordm @sargeantsea @sokkasdarling @thecollection @mayday1284 @kashasenpai @misskrql

If your name is in italics, it wouldn’t let me tag you :(

[emmett-is-a-bad-poet]

Luci, do you remember when 6 years ago I mailed you brownies as a Christmas gift?

I made a batch using my mom's secret recipe

(Spoiler: it's from a box)

I used the oven in our duplex for what was the first time in months, and the entire house smelled like something was on fire

But the brownies turned out perfect.

I cut the hardened edges off with a plastic knife and cut the center into nice little squares once the pan cooled down

I individually wrapped each brownie in plastic wrap and arranged them in a christmas themed tin I found at the dollar store

Once I had it all packaged, my mom found some spare money to pay for the postage.

I had never been more excited about mail in my life.

I remember getting a phone call from you a few days later when they arrived on your doorstep

You kept me on the phone until you got to your room,

And when you bit the first brownie you unwrapped,

Your moans were louder and more sensual than they had ever been when we fooled around.

We ended up fighting over something stupid and you called me a "bitch",

But I still fell asleep smiling.

My mom's brownies have not failed me yet, but they still couldn't force you to treat me right.

If I could go back in time, I would bake bits of eggshell into the batter and maybe even add a little arsenic.

I certainly wouldn't take the extra time to make them aesthetically pleasing for someone like you.

No amount of chocolate can fix what is wrong deep inside of you, and I wish I had learned that sooner.

PS, I never got the Christmas cookies you said you sent me. I'm sure they have gone stale by now.

Baked Goods Don't Heal Knife Wounds by Emmett

[likesomekindofcheese]

Cottagecore  (Gwilym Lee x fem! Reader Oneshot)

A/N: Hello! For @queenandborhapevents​ I wrote this fic as a part of an exchange on Ao3 and now I can share it here and reveal who I am! Hello there @itsametaphorgwil​! I am your Secret Santa revealed! I am glad you enjoyed it and know I enjoyed writing it for your honor!

Word Count: 1,832

Summary: When reaching your dream job gets too stressful, Gwilym suggests an escape to the countryside to get you to relax.

Warnings: not much, some swearing, drinking, a touch of angst, but mostly fluff, and poor Reader being on edge.

“Y/N, if you would like this position, here are the things you need to work on for the next month. Then we might give you this offer,” the woman stated.

You nodded your head enthusiastically. Every word was put into your brain in the strongest part of storage. Your dream job was eminent. The people you have admired for ages were pushing you on. Every dollar spent, every hour clocked in, and every bit of training and studying and student debt was about to be worth it.

“We’ll try you out and interview at this point on the fifteenth of next month, sounds good?” she folded her arms in her black pantsuit, slightly serious.

A Pollyanna smile grew on you.

“Of course! I will!”

You wound up practicing and trying every free hour you had for this job. Cups of coffee devoured. Then water to make up for coffee. Then constant bathroom breaks. Words in front of you seemed fuzzy. But you kept at it.

Even when your boyfriend, Gwilym was around, it was all you could talk or think about.

“Hey Y/N…let’s escape,” he suggested. “There’s a place…it’s out in the country!”

“I don’t know…” you sighed.

“It will be fun!” he begged, taking your hand.

With a huff, you nod.

“Where is it?”

“Pembroke-near some family.”

Pembroke! Grassy fields, a nearby ocean…

And two whole weeks without work!

He led you into the cottage excitedly. Then his smile dropped briefly as he saw you pull out your laptop from its bag on the kitchen table.

“Annwyl, did you bring anything related to your job with you?” he asked sternly.

The laptop clicked shut and you let out a sigh.

“Yes, it’s just that…I’m really afraid of failing!” you cried. “It’s just…I’ve been…been afraid to relax. I’m just so close to my dreams coming true, and I’ve been struggling and hustling just to get the opportunity…I feel like if I let go…it will slip away from me.” Tears came out before you could stop them.

He hugged you. You could hear the rustling of trees.

“Then promise me this…every day you do one hour- and only one hour- of work and the rest of the day, you try to breathe.”

You nodded, “of course.”

“Oh, Y/N, I completely understand but…you’ve seemed so…it isn’t going to go away if you enjoy yourself for a bit.”

He kissed the top of your head tenderly.

Settling into the cottage, the sunlight poured in from everywhere. Dust specks flitted around in circles as if they were dancing. You only flicked the lights on when it got dark.

Both of you had to see the garden around the house. There were more roses, lilacs, and peonies than you could count and plenty of green sprouts not even Gwilym could name.

Soon you were walking down to the markets, drinking cold lemonades, and buying a large basket of strawberries in their prime: large, red, and juicy, almost like candy to devour.

The next morning, you felt him shake you awake.

“Cariad…look out the window…” he said softly, kissing your temple.

The sun was rising and the whole world was baked in a sweet, pink light. The sunlight was melting over the fields, making it glow.

“Are we in a fairy tale?” you asked.

You could sense the sleepiness in your voice and you felt two arms pull you close, so your back touched his chest. You heard the slight rumble of his laughter.

“No, we’re in Pembrokeshire, but close.”

There was a ten-minute stroll to town, passing herd of sheep or a goat enjoying its breakfast of dandelions. The town was tiny- the houses still had vines, dates from the 1600s in the upper corner and every nook had little shops and businesses and whatnot. People walked by, from children on bicycles to grandmothers ushering in guests for tea.

Nearby there was a stone bridge. A river babbled beneath it and across you could make out taller buildings, some painted a gaudy yellow or a musty red.

But something about the rust on the bridge’s sides made it feel surreal, ancient. Every step you took you held your breath because it might collapse and fall. It never did.

On your third day there you noticed there was a gaggle of little ducks, clucking nasally as they glided across the water’s edge.

“Look!” you cried, pointing to them.

Gwil leaned his brown head over in your direction. “Why, look at these little fellows!”

Normally at this time, as soon as your walk with Gwil was over, you took to your work: editing your resume, cover letter, and other items online and practicing and curating what the try-out would consist of.

But today was different. You felt tired at the thought of that hour approaching. You wanted to take your time.

“Should we get them bread?” you asked.

“Not bread, that will make them sick…”

Gwil ran up to a plant shop and got them seeds, you both took turns tossing it to them. Laughing at the way they shook their beaks as they ate. Soon a mother waded forward with a trail of ducklings behind her- all peeping in high little voices and in a line so straight it seemed mechanical.

He opened the bag and released the seeds into his palm. Their graininess against the softness of his skin. Reaching in for a bit, you could smell the earth it came from.

He walked closer over the edge of the bridge. His reflection looking back up at him from the blue of the water A few ducks hovered toward the mirror Gwil, quacking in curiosity.

He let a few seeds fall with a plop into the water.

They nibbled graciously. As they chewed with their beaks open, a pretty, little white duck passed by, sniffing for morsels as well.

Grinning, you obliged, letting a few seeds fall from your fingertips. They landed, creating ripples that went to the edges, growing fainter. But the white duck wagged its tail as if it were a canine and devoured the seeds.

“How would you like a beach day, tomorrow?” he asked. “It’s only an hour dive.”

“Is that even a question?” you replied, giving him a chaste kiss.

The hour drive long drive seemed to take forever with no beachy signals except for the smell. Until a road that went downhill showed the yellow sand right where it dipped down- flowing out of the grass until soon it replaced the fields as you drove onto it and parked.

The sand dissolved between your toes; the breeze was cool against your legs. Only a few people came and went as they day was slightly overcast.

“Yeesss! Let’s swim, Y/N!” your boyfriend cheered, leaping out of the car.

Gwil ran childishly toward the ocean in his swim trunks and you in your red one-piece, pulling you with him. Though you shrieked at the icy water, it soon seemed normal and refreshing to feel around your calves.

Both of you splashed at each other and got deep enough to swim. Often bending down to pick up interesting little seashells and collect them in a glass jar.

Suddenly Gwil turned his head, let out a slight swear, and covered your eyes with his hands.

“Oh, Y/N, I’m glad you said yes today…” he teased, walking against you so you had to walk forward.

“What! How come? What are you up to?” you asked.

“We havesome guests!” he announced.

“Are you really going to let us have all the fun?” a sweet voice asked in front of you.

He pulled his hands away and you let out a squeal. You knew that blonde bob and pair of bright eyes anywhere.

“Lucy! Lucy, what are you doing here!”

“Rami’s filming, and Gwil had told us you guys were vacationing. Might as well go over and say hello!”

Salt caught into your hair to where you smelt in all day. You missed the scent of the ocean and the sound of its lulling, but hearing Rami and Lucy catch up as Gwil drove back made up for it.

“Oh- we got two local Cabernet bottles to try…would you stay for a drink?” Gwil offered, pulling up near the cottage.

That night, the wine overtook you both, Lucy especially.

“It’s cold! Let’s go in the room!” Lucy insisted, as red as the strawberries in the fridge.

She went over to an extra guest room in the cottage- it was smaller with white walls, a few paintings, and a tiny window. But the bed was so large it took up half the space.

Ooooh! It’s sooooft!” she cooed as she settled on it.

Both of you pulled the duvet over the two of you and began talking softly. You heard Rami and Gwil catching up downstairs with talk of directors and long days of filming.

“Hmmph, do you think this shirt shows too much of my titties?” you asked.

Laying down in the bed had pulled the edge of your shirt down and you began to stubbornly pull it u.

Lucy began giggling like mad. She pulled the duvet over her head into a large lump.

“What is it?” you asked.

She poked her face out with an elfish gleam in her eye.

“Titties!”

You both began to giggle profusely. There are creaks upstairs as Rami and Gwil walk in, bemused at the two of you. Lucy and you pulled blankets up over your mouths to stop.

“You alright? You both had a lot…” Gwil began, walking closer to see your faces.

“We’re fine, it’s just…” you began.

“It’s about…about titties!” she blurted.

You both burst out howling.

Rami and Gwil looked at each other, beaming despite Lucy’s tipsiness.  They ran downstairs and returned with a small plate of cheese, crackers, and apple slices.

“We’ll leave you ladies be,” Rami promised.

He put it on Lucy’s lap. She grinned and gave him a smooch as thanks.

Gwil stood by the door, watching you take a bit of a red apple slice.

“Just have something on your stomachs,” he added before Rami returned to shut the door.

Lucy and you giggling over snacks was the memory you kept inside you. That and the beach, the ducks, the berries, as you and Gwil crossed the corner where the fateful building stood.

A month had gone since this was planned and the day you expected and dreaded had arrived. You whisper the right words and picture it. And none of it is forgotten- a muscle memory.

“Darling…thank you for the trip. No matter what comes to it-I needed to enjoy things and not let it all get to me,” you say, pausing before the door.

He cups your face, “you always put your heart and soul into things…and I love you for it.”

As Gwil walks with you to the building, saying he will wait outside. He kisses you on your forehead, leaving a subtle, shiny mark there as you walk in.

Taglist: @queenlover05​ @stardust-killer-queen​ @rhapsodyrecs​ @joeneslee​ @yourlocalmusicalprostitute​ @coincidence-ithinknots-blog​ @bens-jawline​ @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye​

[missmaxime]

Mouth; room; close; keen

You really know what you’re asking, haha. I cherry-picked for the first three, because as it turns out I use those a lot. And fyi under ‘Close’ is a small excerpt of the Joan/Rio fic ;) 💕 MOUTH From ‘Shine a Light Now (This Time it’s got to be Good)’

“Apparently I am ‘overqualified’,” Beth complains dramatically, putting extra emphasis on it by adding sloppy air quotation marks. Phoebe starts opening her mouth to ask because she cuts her off with: “Find my Family a Pet, Season 5.” Phoebe sputters, grabbing a can of coke to rinse her mouth and spitting it on the pavement. “It’s animals, elderly ánd kids, the three circles of hell. Rookie stuff, damn sure you’re overqualified.”

From ‘Wild at Heart’ Chapter 5

Paul put the bag down, leaning onto the reception desk. “You don’t want to join me and Marissa for breakfast?” he asked. “I hear it’s delicious here.” Rio encircled his arm around Beth’s waist, squeezing it. He clacked his tongue against the roof of his mouth. Beth grabbed ahold of his hand, dragging it onto her belly. “Maybe we’ll join you tomorrow, Rio and I have an important appointment.” Rio stroked her through her coat, and Paul picked up on the hint.

From ‘If worst comes to worst, I left a note’

“Y’know what ya getting into?” he asks. She smirks. “Do you?” His eyes get darker and her attacks her mouth again, slipping his tongue between her lips. She circles her hand onto the back of his head, pulling him into her more. And, as much as she hates to admit it, it’s nothing like she ever experienced. Not with Dean, not with the two boys she kissed before, this is something more, and it’s frightening. Frightening, but thrilling. 

From ‘The Kaleidoscope of Love’

And she surges back into him, claiming his mouth. Their lips sliding over each other, erupting sparks in her chest she can’t remember feeling. Their position frustrates Beth, sitting next to each other, so she takes it upon herself to pull back from him – the groan he releases almost embarrassing. She doesn’t let him wait long, climbing onto him so she can straddle him. The trail his warm hands leave on her skin as he lets them travel up from her knees to her thighs, before sliding them under her dress is mesmerizing. She kissing him briefly on the lips. “More,” she breathes, quite sure her pitch is quite uneven. 

From (WT) ‘Come on baby, won’t you show some class’ [aka Mick locks Beth and Rio in a storage room because he’s tired of their shit]

Rio lets his fingers travel along her panties, feeling how wet she already is for him. He chuckles at that, increasing the pressure. “Yeah, you want me, don’t you darling?” He says, now slipping two fingers between her folds, feeling the heaviness of her wetness flooding his hand. He leans his head in, putting his mouth against her ear. “Don’t you?’ he asks, but sucks her earlobe in before she can answer, retracting a very repressed moan from her. That just riles her, and she tries to retract her bend leg from the table. But he grasps her ankle, keeping that leg in place. He reaches out with his other hand, buttoning open his pants, pulling down those and his boxers far enough to extract his lid. “Don’t, do, that,” he says, licking her face on one side in one long stroke. And she revels in it, against her better judgement. 

From (WT) ‘Get Well Soon’ [or the S3 deviation I started writing before S3 aired - FYI Orla is the realtor the girls use to find a store]

The day went by in a blur at best. Beth and Ruby had been cleaning the worst of the storage rooms for almost the entire day. Next they had painted the front-side of the store all white, immediately changing the look of it from depressed to welcoming. And when Orla entered the store around two she even took of her mouth mask. “Look who got this place close to presentable,” she stated, looking around somewhat impressed. Ruby threw her paintbrush into the turpentine. “I’m sure it still smells like fish,” she sighed. “Well, yeah,” Orla admitted. “But at least now it’s thinly masked by chemicals. And as you can tell by my face that’s something I’m way more comfortable with,” she joked. Ruby laughed, kind of surprised by Orla’s sense of humor. “I did hear it’s a bad idea to shoot anchovies up your forehead anyway.” Orla shrugged. “I’ll try anything with a success rate of over 85%, so bring it,” she smiled as she put a bunch of papers on the counter. 

ROOM From ‘Wild at Heart’ Chapter 5 (apparently I use this word a LOT in this chapter, Imma cut down on that one haha)

“No, we’re good,” Salazar answered. She exited the same way the game. “Got enough estrogen in the room as it is, right?” he said, grabbing his teacup and raising it to Rio. Who answered by raisin his own cup. Beth looked at him with disdain, she failed to hide it. She tried to separate this business Rio from the Rio she knew from the wedding, and even though she could fracture herself easily, breaking him up into different people was way harder. “Are you kidding me?” she shot at Rio. He gave her nothing. “We were in business before I was in your bed, you should give me some credits,” she said angrily. “My ass is on the line here too. And I sure as hell have more on that line than you do!”

From ‘If worst comes to worst, I left a note’

“Why didn’t you like me last time?” she asks. “Think you wouldn’t be interested.” Beth is taken aback by that, and it shows. “Why? You liked someone better?” she throws back. He laughs genuinely and shakes his head. “Nah. Just thought I’d was a bit out of your wheelhouse.” “Why?” she asks. But the buzzer goes off, and he wastes no time getting to the other side of the room to get to his next date.

From ‘The Kaleidoscope of Love’

Turner’s been on holiday with his boyfriend for a week in Bora Bora, and since he’s the only one who talks to the matches she doesn’t really have anything to do. She has already cleaned the front office and the break room and the cabinet with office supplies after two days, so now her most potentially productive activity is putting colorful post-its on her own face. Fortunately, just before she feels like her last braincells are dying off, the phone rings. And she scrambles to sit up in her chair, grabbing the horn. “Love Inc, Amber speaking, how may—” “Amber!” It’s Turner. He sounds agitated. “Well, hello sunshine,” she smiles, feel her own teeth crack at the faux sweet tone of it. “Cut the crap,” he orders. And she can’t really make out a lot of background noise, but the loud voices in the background, and actually – altogether chaos, don’t sound too promising. For him though, this sounds like all the opportunity for her. 

From ‘A Tail to Remember’ [AU where Beth suddenly sprouts a tail that acts on her deepest desires]

“What?” she croaks, her voice still paralyzed by sleep. She rubs her eyes with the back of her hand, and when she can see well through the dusk of the room, she sees Dean laying face down onto the ground next to the bed. “You pushed me!” he’s upset, face crowded with angry splotches of red. And, did she? She looks at where she’s at; still very much on her own side, not even close to the middle. “How?” she asks confused. He’s being all angry-toddler about it, gathering his covers and dumping them on the airbed. “I’m sure you just had a bad dream,” she offers. 

From ‘Get Well Soon’

Beth let the curtain drop back again and focused on the envelope, as she walked back to her room. She turned it around in her hands, there was no address, no stamp. She dropped onto the bed as she opened the crimson envelope in her hands, extracting the midnight blue card from it. In swirly silver printed handwriting it said ‘Get Well Soon!’ surrounded by differently shaped stars. Beth almost sighed in relief, recognizing the print from Lucy’s Etsy. When she opened it though, it felt like she was being doused in icy cold water. ‘Thinking of you lots!’ was staring at her, mocking her with a scarily recognizable handwriting even without the weird e’s he usually wrote. Without another thought Beth threw the card into a corner, dimmed the lights, and crawled into the bed, hoping it would swallow her while she would fight her nightmares that night. 

CLOSE From the ‘Untitled Joan Holloway/Rio’ fic

“I did tell him I’d give him a dollar if Mick would be there in promised time. He lived up to expectations,” she explained. Rio turned his head. “Give him two,” he ordered Mick, before returning his attention back to Joan. She felt great with Rio ignoring the line of people waiting outside to get in, the bouncer opening the door without even giving them a questioning look. Inside was a whole different experience than the rundown outside gave. It was still kind of dark but the lighting and music gave it an intimate and welcoming feel. He escorted her to a booth close to the bar, looking out onto the dance floor. It was very obvious she was one of the very few white people here. “What’s your poison?” he asked, signaling a waiter. “Maybe some bourbon?” she asked. He ordered a bottle of the good stuff. She liked that. She turned her back to him. “Would you mind, taking the pins out?” she asked, her chin pushed against her shoulder as she looked at him expectantly.

From ‘Wild at Heart’ Chapter 5

Beth drops her bag, and moves in on him. “You know, I shot that window pretty good last time,” she says haughtily. “Yeah, when you were on your feet,” he says. Beth takes the gun from him. And she’s taken back to that one night Rio shot Dean in the chest. And by now she’s pretty sure he wasn’t totally honest about not knowing if that shot would leave him alive. Especially after what she now knows she can do with a gun, much less Rio, who has years and years’ experience on her. “So, did Sal get back to you?” she asks, while she takes a stand close to him, taking a hold on his gun. 

From ‘The Kaleidoscope of Love’

It’s all he needs to fully attack her mouth. Entangling his hand in her hair, pulling her in as close as they can get. Their lips slandering, navigating to tend to each other’s needs, sucking and biting, both teasing and tending with conviction. She smiles a little when she thinks about the lipstick marks she’s probably leaving on his face, takes pride in marking him, letting everybody know what they’ve been up to. The thought makes her bolder, rocking her hips against his, a movement he immediately answers, groaning into her.

KEEN NOTHING (*le gasp*). Well, there is once, but it’s in the chapter of Shine A Light Now (This Time it’s got to be Good) where I’m working on now, and that’s just too rough of a draft.  

[thethoughtsfromthreeam]

Monument Woman

Pairing: Marcus Pike x OC (Rosemary Carter)

Warnings: A bit of angst

A/N: Sort of trucking along, now into chapter 4, which gets us into the meat of this whole story, so I guess this sorta qualifies as a slow burn?  Not sure.  Anyway, enjoy!

Reminder: I ain’t ever seen Pedro Pascal in FUCK ALL, I’m just coming up with this as I go along, using imdb.com, wiki, and 84,000 tabs I got open to plan out this shit.  I also write soft versions of his characters so if you’re craving asshole vibes, I ain’t got any but my own to offer.

Tag List:

@zeldasayer , @beskars , @coolmaybelateruniverse , @the-feckless-wonder , @pascalisthepunkest , @mandoandyodito , @randomness501 , @fioccodineveautunnale  , @ahopelessromanticwritersworld , @lilkermit14 [please message me to be added or subtracted]

Part 2 – Well, It’s Valuable for Starters

Coral Gables Restaurant sits right on the banks of the Kalamazoo River, serving as the perfect backdrop to any lunch or dinner date.  It was Robert’s favorite place to eat and the whole staff knew him.  So, lunch dates for the two history buffs could last hours and no one would say anything to them.

Long after the lunch plates had been taken away, Robert nursed his beer and Rosemary leaned back in her chair, letting the early summer sun warm her skin.  As she sat there with her eyes closed, Robert let himself just watched her.  She was tall with a brunette pixie cut – the only hair style he’s ever seen her sport – and he noted there was greyer hair than when they first met and finer lines on the youthful face.

She took up a lot of space with her personality and that’s what he loved best about her.  Of all the people Robert called his friends, none were close to him like she was. When he met her not long after she started at the museum and it was an almost instant rapport.

He never had children of his own, never even gotten married.  But something about Rosemary drew him to her and he felt this love for her like he hadn’t ever felt for anyone else in his nearly seventy-two years.  When the doctor gave him the prognosis, he realized the sadness that had washed over him wasn’t about his death but the fact that he had someone he was leaving behind. It both hurt and consoled him.  He wasn’t going to be alone.

“Rosie.”  His voice was soft, but she still heard him and opened her eyes.  He smiled at her and she sat up and nodded, pulling her chair closer so she was more comfortable to chat.  The waitress appeared with refills for Rosemary’s lemonade and another beer for Robert.  They stayed quiet until she left.  When they were alone again, she raised her eyebrow and gestured for him to continue.

“If there are things in those boxes that you can sell for the museum, go for it.  There are a few I want the museum to have and one item it needs to take.”

“Well, I doubt I’ll take anything that will cause me extra work, but we can draw up the deed of gift on the other items as normal.  I already have my eye on a few things, which are probably among what you are already giving us.”  He nodded. “What’s the item you want us to take for sure?”

“The Cornucopia.”  Her eyebrow raised in confusion at the comment.  “It’s a priceless art piece, a friend of mine valued it at three-quarters of a million dollars. On the low end of things.”

“WHAT?” Rosemary’s jaw dropped.  Holy shit.

“I know, I was surprised it valued so high as well.  I bought it at an antique shop in Chicago years ago and given how valuable it is, I want the museum to have it.”

“Uh, hell yeah!”  Rosemary’s eyes began to gleam with glee and Robert laughed.  He knew she was thinking of Fred and he was pleased he could help her get a leg up on the man.  While Breyers had never been anything but courteous towards the storeowner, there was an underlying hostility to the curator’s words and actions.  Something about the greedy curator never sat well with Robert and he shared in Rosemary’s dislike of him.  

“When we head back to the house after lunch, we’ll talk more.”  The two sat back and grinned at each other.

---***---

“But, ma’am. . . Ma’am. . .” Agent Horacio paused, the murderous look on their face not even showing up in their voice.  “Ma’am, I get what you are saying.  I’m asking you to set up a meeting with me to go over the case. Yes, we reopened it.  Yes, we’re working on it.  Now if you would just. . .”

The ever-patient voice of the agent faded into the background as Carmichael skirted the table with a handful of photos, a small smirk on her face. She walked up next to Pike as they filled the evidence board with the last of the pictures from the case files.  A second and third board were set up on the other side of the room, allowing the team to make further critical connections to the cases they had so recently linked together.

They worked quietly for a bit, Carmichael subtly shooting glances at Pike, whose brow was furrowed in concentration.  Finally, her curiosity got the better of her and she turned to look at her partner.

“Okay, spill.  How did the date go with Lucy in Accounting?” Her voice dropped to a whisper belying the eager look on her face.  Pike grimaced at the question as he pressed on the last of the push pins.

“There was no date. She stood me up.”  Her loud gasp caused a few of their team to look their way, but she ignored them, giving Pike a look to continue.  “I called twice, and she never answered.  Never even showed up to the date itself.  I don’t think I can go back to Bobby’s anymore.  Lindsey is starting to feel sorry for me.”

“Hell, I feel sorry for you, Pike.  That’s the third date you’ve been stood up on in, what? Two months?” Carmichael’s voice softened.  The poor man was having a rough time of it, what with Lisbon breaking his heart, his divorce before that, three failed short-term relationships after he came to D.C., and now this series of no-show dates over the last year.  She frowned and laid a hand on his wrist, which had stilled on the last pin as his words died on his tongue.

He didn’t look at her and she could feel him stiffen underneath her touch. He pushed down his growing frustration at the situation and turned to smile at her, the grin not coming close to reaching his eyes.  His shoulders squared up as if to say the conversation was done.  She had known the man for six years and just wanted him to be happy, but for the moment, she gave him a small smile to help him with his charade.

“It’s okay Carmichael, maybe I’m just not meant for a relationship.” His voice sounded almost sad at the tone and she bowed her head.

“I don’t think that’s true, Marcus.”

“Yeah, well the universe is working hard to tell me that I’m meant to be single. I should be listening instead of fighting it.”  He sighed and turned away, walking out of the room before anyone could comment on the large frown that had formed on his face.  She looked after him, a defeated look in her eyes.  No one loved as hard and as loyal as him, he deserved the world. She knew that the right person for him was out there, but she couldn’t understand why Pike hadn’t crossed paths with his soulmate yet.  

She turned back to the board, picking up the marker to begin labeling the photos they had posted.  While she wrote, she silently prayed to the universe that her partner’s heart found its home sooner rather than later.

-*-

Pike looked at himself in the mirror, droplets of water still on his skin and the strands of hair framing his face were damp.  Splashing water on his face helped cool down his skin, but Carmichael’s words of sympathy had stung, even if she meant well, and he had to leave the room before he got upset even more.  As he leaned against the sink, he bowed his head and took a few deep breaths. The small moment of zen from earlier in the day had faded and the headache had returned.

It was known that the agent wore his heart on his sleeve, that he was loyal and generous to a fault.  Most of his colleagues loved him for it and it inspired loyalty from those who worked under him.  But none of that seemed to translate into anything romantically successful.  At this point, he was certain that he was a running joke throughout D.C. and that women agreed to a date to see how long he’d wait at his favorite diner for someone to show up.

Last night, Lindsey comped his dinner because she just couldn’t take the defeated slump to the man’s shoulders one more time.  She even went home and hugged her wife, hoping a little of her joviality would seep into her bones.  If Pike knew that, he would have bitterly laughed at the idea that he can help other people love harder, he just couldn’t get people to love him back.

After letting the dark thoughts swirl through his brain for a little longer, he stood up straight and glanced into the mirror.  He wiped his face one more time and straightened his tie. Without looking back at his reflection, Marcus Pike vowed to himself that he wasn’t going to let anyone in anymore. He was here to catch art thieves and that’s what he was going to do.

He just prayed the yearning in his heart heard the declaration, too.

---***---

Rosemary huffed as she staggered up the walkway to the front door of the museum with the heavy box in her arms.  She cursed herself for thinking that she could carry such an awkward and heavy load by herself, but she was a stubborn mule and was determined to get it all done in one trip.  She sighed when she reached the top of the short staircase.

She reached out and kicked the frame of the door into the building knowing that their long-time volunteer, Bob, was at the front desk.  There was something about him that grated against Rosemary and if truth be told, he was a bad volunteer, but he was the only reliable one and so she had to put up with him and his nonsense.

She realized with a start that she’d been standing there for several minutes, and no one had come to the door.  She peeped through the glass and saw Bob sitting there, looking her way. Grimacing as she shifted the box, she kicked the door again, harder this time.

And he still didn’t move.

With a low growl, Rosemary shifted around and pressed her butt against the handicap button on the wall and with a sigh of relief, she walked through the now open door.  While the June day wasn’t particularly hot, the sun was still warm and the physical activity overheated her.  The cool air of the lobby felt like kisses of heaven on her skin and she slightly closed her eyes at the sensation.  When she opened them, she looked directly at the man in front of her.

“Bob, did you see me kicking the door?”

“Yep.”

“So why didn’t you come open it for me, you clearly saw my hands were full.”

“Kicking is rude.”  The man’s rheumy eyes stared at her and it took two deep breaths to ensure Rosemary wasn’t going to start screaming.  She gave him a tightened smile instead and she walked over to the elevator. “Rosemary, the elevator is for handicap people, you’re not handicapped.”

“Bob, the elevator is for everyone.  Goodbye!”  She entered the small space and leaned against the wall.  We need him, we need him, we need him, she chanted to herself, nothing convincing her that it was true.  The ride to the third floor was a short one, but the heavy box made it seem longer.  When the doors opened, she took a left down to the staff offices and her workspace.

She did her best to carefully set the box down on the bench, but she grimaced as she heard rattling inside.  When it didn’t sound like anything broke, she heaved a sigh of relief. She turned her head as she heard footsteps from the hallway and within moments, Helen enter the room.

“How did it go?”  She had a small smile on her face, coming closer to the work bench

“Not bad, I took one big box of stuff – good stuff, too.”  The curator grinned and Helen grinned back, curiosity all over her face.

“Nothing ugly?”

“God no.  As my grams liked to say, ‘God don’t like ugly.’”  She lifted the lid off the box and suddenly Rosemary screamed, scaring Helen and causing her to scream, too.  The latter jumped back towards the door, unsure of what was happening.  The sounds of the two women yelling echoed in the room until the scream Rosemary let out evolved into a laugh, tinged with adrenaline. “FUCKING ROBERT!”

“WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?”  Helen was now on edge and creeping back closer to the work bench, still wary. Rosemary reached into the box and lifted out the stuff monkey she passed over earlier.  Helen recoiled at the sight.

“I thought you said you didn’t bring back anything ugly!”

“I didn’t!  He must have put it in here after I told him it was worthy of the dumpster.”  The laughter continued as she looked at the stuffed animal.  Finally, she sighed and set the monkey down on the bench.

“You’re not putting it in the collections are you?”  The director still looked at the item with wariness.  It was truly ugly with its almost realistic eyes. She shuttered before looking away.

“No, but I’m going to keep it, though.  He’d probably make a better watch dog than Banana.”  Looking around, Rosemary turned to her boss.  “Speaking of which, where is that dog of mine?”

“He’s in your office, conked out on the couch and snoring away.”

“See?!  I need the monkey now.  My own dog, of whom I am his whole world, didn’t even come hither at my screams.  I am abandoned and unloved.”  Rosemary ended her dramatic comment on a sigh, her hand against her forehead.  The two women began to laugh again.

“By the way, please for the love of all that is holy, find someone to replace Bob at the front desk.  He watched me kick the door to get in and refused to get up.”

“Did he say why?”

“Yeah, ‘kicking is rude.’”  Rosemary mimicked the old man’s gravelly voice and rolled her eyes. Helen patted her shoulder and said she’d chat with Bob about it, but the curator didn’t have much faith in the forth-coming conversation.  The director left the room and Rosemary dove back into the box to pull out the rest of her treasures.

---***---

“Here is the paperwork on the history of The Cornucopia. Please promise me that you’ll list this as a restricted item.”  Robert sat down, a file folder in his hand.  “I know better than to make outrageous demands, but I want it in the paperwork that this item cannot be loaned out, it cannot be displayed, and it is to remain the collections for the rest of the museum’s existence.  I don’t even want it announced that you have the piece.”

He took a breath and Rosemary’s eyebrows furrowed.  He hadn’t been kidding when he said he had restrictions on the item.  He continued.

“The piece is valuable; I don’t want the museum becoming a target for it. I’m giving it to you because I know you’ll protect it.”  Rosemary nodded as she thumbed through the file, skimming the history of the sculpture. She looked up at him.

“Let me write up the deeds for you and we’ll note everything you want me to list in terms of restrictions.”  She got up and went to her computer set up on the table.  For the next hour, she sat asking Robert questions and filling out the forms, using the printer to create physical copies. After she was done, she sat back.

“We’ll take good care of it.  I promise.”

---***---

The next day, Rosemary sat at her desk, imputing the new collection pieces into PastPerfect, transcribing notes she had scribbled in her binder.   Most of the pieces she had taken were worth it; besides the map, she took a few pieces of pottery from a celebrated local artist, a couple of prints that dated back to the Fort’s early years, seven quilts, and several history books.  And of course, The Cornucopia.

She pulled the file out for the sculpture and sat back in her chair. After opening the folder, she began to read the files she had skimmed earlier.  The more she read the appraiser’s history more her eyebrows crawled up her forehead.

The Cornucopia was created for Russian Tsar Nicolas II by renown Ukrainian artists Artem Chumak.  The bronze sculpture was inlaid with rubies, sapphires, yellow diamonds, jade, pearls, and opals, most mined from around the Russian Empire.  Ukraine historically has been known as the breadbasket of Russia and the piece was commissioned by the Ukrainian government as a gift to Nicolas upon his marriage to Princess Alexandra of Hess.  It’s value at the time of creation was $250,000 USD.

It is known that Dowager Empress Maria took the piece, along with several other valuable items after the fall of the Empire and she sold it to the Grand Duke of Luxembourg in 1920, who in turn loaned it to the country’s National Museum of History and Art the following year. The museum returned it to the family during World War II to protect it from the advancing German army.  It was again loaned to the museum for another twenty years before the family chose to cease ownership.

The piece was then sold via Sotheby’s Auction House in 1965 to a private collector in the U.S. and has remained in private ownership since then.  Because of its history and the materials used, the value of The Cornucopia is approximately $750,000 for insurance purposes, but on the auction block, could fetch upwards to . . .

“Three million dollars?!”  Rosemary shrieked, her feet dropping to the floor as she sat up.  She looked at the sculpture sitting on her worktable and her face broke out in a grin.  Oh, ho ho ho, she really got the leg up on Fred Breyers this time.  This was the best gift that Robert could have ever given her.

[papermoonloveslucy]

LUCY MAKES A FEW EXTRA DOLLARS

S4;E6 ~ October 18, 1971

Directed by Coby Ruskin ~ Written by Phil Leslie and Ralph Goodman

Synopsis

Lucy is in desperate need of a raise to balance her budget so she takes desperate measures to convince Harry she deserves it. 

Regular Cast

Lucille Ball (Lucy Carter), Gale Gordon (Harrison Otis Carter), Lucie Arnaz (Kim Carter)  

Guest Cast

Gary Morton (Carnival Barker) was a comedian who worked the famed ‘Borscht Belt’ in the Catskills Mountains. He met Lucille Ball shortly after her divorce from Desi Arnaz and they married in November 1961. At her request, Morton gave up his nightclub career and became a producer of “The Lucy Show.” Morton also served as a warm-up comic for the show’s studio audience. He appeared in “Lucy and the Andrews Sisters” (S2;E6) and “Lucy and Sammy Davis Jr.” (S3;E3). Morton passed away in 1999.

The final credits list Morton as “Pitchman”.  

Larry J. Blake (Fireman) first appeared as a Native American Medicine Man in “Lucy the Rain Goddess” (TLS S4;E15). He was an ex-vaudevillian making the fourth of his eight “Here’s Lucy” appearances. 

Jack Berle (Restaurant Patron, uncredited) was the older brother of Milton Berle. This is one of his eleven uncredited appearances on the series.  He previously did two episodes of “The Lucy Show.” 

Joan Carey (Restaurant Patron, uncredited) was one of the few performers to be seen on “I Love Lucy,” “The Lucy Show,” and “Here’s Lucy.” She was also one of Lucille Ball’s camera and lighting stand-ins. 

Charles Cirillo (Carnival Worker, uncredited) played a singing and dancing truck driver in “Lucy Helps Ken Berry” (TLS S6;E21).  This is his last appearance on “Here's Lucy.”

Victor Romito (Carnival Worker, uncredited) was seen as the Bartender in “Lucy Meets John Wayne” (TLS S5;E10). He also appeared in four episodes of “Here’s Lucy.”  Romito was an extra in the 1960 Lucille Ball / Bob Hope film Critic’s Choice.

Walter Smith (Carnival Patron, uncredited) made 13 mostly uncredited appearances on the series.  He also did one episode of “The Lucy Show.”  

The other diners at the restaurant, other carnival patrons, and the two firemen who enter with Larry J. Blake, all go uncredited.

In order to get Harry to give her a raise, Lucy and Kim employ the following tactics:

Flatter him by hanging a portrait of him at the office with the inscription “Our Beloved Founder.”

Take him to lunch at his favorite restaurant where Kim has been forced to take a job waiting tables, despite having no skill for the work.

Hosting lunch for the other secretaries in the building and selling them soft drinks, then returning the cans for the deposit.

Using their life savings to pretend to operate a counterfeiting outfit at the office.

The photograph of Gale Gordon used in both “The Lucy Show” and “Here's Lucy” has returned!  Lucy correctly says that the photograph was taken about ten years ago!  

It was originally a black and white portrait of Gale Gordon as Mr. Mooney on “The Lucy Show” used on posters and billboards when he ran for comptroller in “Lucy Goes Into Politics” (TLS S2;E25). After that it was seen above Mr. Mooney's mantle in his living room.  It then turns up on “Here's Lucy” colorized in “Lucy Goes on Strike” (S1;E16)... 

...and “Lucy Protects Her Job” (S2;E14) where it was impaled on ram's horns. 

It was transformed into Harry's great grandfather in “Lucy Takes Over” (S2;E23).  

Harry says he feels like a gigolo having Lucy pay the check at lunch.  When she asks if he would like to pick up the check instead, Harry sings a few bars of “Just a gigolo, everywhere I go.”  “Just a Gigolo” was a popular song, adapted by Irving Caesar in 1929 from an Austrian tango. It was most famously covered by Louis Prima in 1956.

Harry's favorite waitress at his favorite lunch spot is named Charlotte.  

To help pay the bills, Kim takes a job waiting tables earning forty cents an hour! She could make $10 an hour if she worked topless, a scandalous reference for the normally squeaky clean “Here’s Lucy”!  

Harry says he started working delivering newspapers at 6 years old!  

Clumsy Kim dumps a plate of salad on her Uncle Harry as well as a glass of iced tea!  It is clear that Lucie Arnaz is following in her mother's footsteps.  This fulfills one of “Here's Lucy”'s comic requirements – getting Harry wet.  In this episode, Harry gets revenge when Lucy moonlights at a carnival dunk tank!  They both get soaked while trying to put out a waste basket fire with the water cooler jug!

Lucy says her life-savings is $150. In today’s economy, Lucy has just $950 in the bank! 

Lucy calls the printing press her 'Jolly Green Budget Balancer.'  Harry calls it her 'Private Edition of Fort Knox.'  This is one of several references to The Jolly Green Giant, the cartoon mascot of Green Giant frozen vegetables.  It is also one of many references (usually by Gale Gordon) to Fort Knox, the Kentucky military installation that houses most of the country's gold reserves.  

A carnival was also the setting for “Lucy Misplaces $2,000” (TLS S1;E4) in 1962.  

Gulp! After Lucy comes up from her dunk in the tank, she has her cheeks puffed out looking as if she's about to spit out some water. This would be a typical follow up to the joke itself.  But when Lucy opens her mouth, no water comes out.  It is possible she swallowed it!  

Harry's Old Flame! Even after being doused with water and foam from the fire extinguisher, the waste paper basket fire flares up again. Gale Gordon still tries to set Lucy's employment contract ablaze using a cigarette lighter instead of just the flames in the waste basket.  

Working Girl!  This is not the first time Kim has taken a job, she worked in a boutique in “Lucy's Working Daughter” (S1;E10).

“Lucy Makes a Few Extra Dollars” rates 3 Paper Hearts out of 5

The fun of this episode is the variety of schemes Lucy has to get her raise!  Any episode with Lucy in a carnival dunk tank (with Gary Morton as the barker), can’t be all bad!  Perhaps the comedy might have been helped with one less scheme - giving the others more screen time for Lucy’s antics.