#John Oliver help me

[fio-of-the-fae-realm]

So anyways this is how my day is going

[sammygender]

do you guys ever think about how john literally groomed sam and dean to be the perfect lucifer vessel and michael sword without ever realising he was doing it. it would make him want to fucking die and yet he does it so perfectly. instils it into sam that he has no autonomy, no control over his life, unconsciously lets him know there is something Wrong about him. instils it into dean that his personhood is in hunting, that that’s how he’s useful and how he can be loved. and none of that’s intentional except maybe sam’s disempowerment. but it still happens.

dean was john’s sword long before he knew he’d be michael’s sword. and sam was john’s, full stop, long before he knew he’d be lucifer’s.

[bringthesauerkraut]

John Oliver interrupts Jon Stewart attempting to break a sex scandal

"...there really should be a pair of Harry Baals"

I love whenever they did these sex scandal song slams cuz I always imagine how weird the phone call to the R Kelly style singer must have been every time 🤣

[bernie-sanders-big-naturals]

there needs to be a conversation about how true, actual left-wing ideals can only get into mainstream news through political satire and comedy. jon stewart and john oliver, for example, can go further left than other news broadcasts and shed light on issues that are ignored by democrats because they are funny. they make just enough jokes to keep you from getting too uncomfortable while discussing some very heavy-handed topics like war, genocide, and systemic oppression.

[nekrosmos]

Nekro you have no idea what you caused in my brain with that last Poker Post. I do apologize for your notifs. 😭 But my god, the potential... Can you imagine if the life Nik tried to keep separate from Price ended up accidentally involving him too? Maybe he pissed off some dealers, maybe it's about the many people who want Nik dead or hurt. The moment Nik hears Prices name being mentioned he loses all composure. Is it hell upon earth? Does he make them regret even *considering* to plot against him? Does John know? Do they have a conversation about honesty and trust, or is John blissfully unaware as his partner goes on a hunting spree? WHO KNOWS!!! It's all so delicious either way. 😌 I think Price would have *some* idea. Just, not to full extent. That poker match does show him the realities his bf deals with though, and that reminder is enough to get him hot and bothered. JFC. I need to take a breather

also feel free to ignore this if you planned on continuing that haha i wouldn't wanna spoil or ruin anything. just here to vomit my thoughts abt nik, apologies 🙂‍↕️🙏

Never apologize for sharing your thoughts Oliv, they are highly valued !!

And for real, there's a lot to think about here. (Poker post in question)

I like the idea that Nikolai is absolutely terrified of his life impacting John in a negative way. He's scared that someone, someday, will be bold enough to try to get to John to get to Nik. It would be a terrible idea, considering how dangerous Price is as well, but it is still a risk.

Nik is also scared that Price aligning himself with someone like him, with his background, with his connections and just general shadiness, will impact John's career eventually. It's one thing to have someone like Nik as a friend, it's something else to be sleeping with him and eventually share a life with him. Maybe some hire-ups already said something about them, threatening John. Of course, Price wouldn't let this shit fly, and he probably wouldn't say anything to Nik either, he doesn't want him to worry, but Nikolai always knows, eventually. John had to reassure him a lot that day, because Nik would absolutely sacrifice his relationship with John to save him, even though John is his reason to live, and Nik means everything to John.

And then, there's your idea that Nikolai would go on a hunting spree after some people threaten or hurt John. You do not fuck with Nikolai, or the man his heart belongs to, and live to tell the tale. He would hunt them, he would get them, and he would finish them, sending a message to anyone who dares to think about attempting the same thing again. Price finds Nik on his doorstep two months later, exhausted, heavy bags under his eyes, and John asks him where he was, says he was worried sick about him. Nikolai smiles softly and simply answers "I was making sure you would be safe, John."

There would definitely be a talk about trust and honesty, because both of them would put themselves in danger to protect the other, and that is just not a productive way to go about things. They're from different worlds, and if things had turn out just a little differently, they could have been from different sides. This thought never leave their brains, and every single time they embrace, Nik and John are grateful that life turned out the way it did.

[majorbaby]

this is why you don't marry a main character. you'll be on your way to have mind blowing shower sex with your boyfriend when your husband shows up with the A-plot and ruins everything RIP trapper

[lastweeksshirttonight]

h e l p

[ilurvjohnoliver]

RAHHHHHHHHHHHH

[pumpkin-the-girlie-girl-vixen]

The Sad Truth About Disability: Insights from Last Week Tonight with John Oliver

In a recent episode of *Last Week Tonight*, host John Oliver tackled the complex and often heartbreaking realities surrounding disability in modern society. With his signature blend of humor and pointed critique, Oliver shed light on the challenges faced by individuals with disabilities, exposing systemic issues that are often overlooked. This blog aims to explore the key topics discussed in the episode and reflect on the broader implications of disability in our world today.

The Marginalization of Disabled Individuals

One of the central themes of Oliver's episode was the societal marginalization of people with disabilities. While the Americans with Disabilities Act (ADA) was a significant step forward in ensuring equal rights and access, many barriers still exist. Oliver highlighted how, despite legal protections, individuals with disabilities often face discrimination in various aspects of life, including employment, healthcare, and public spaces.

The episode emphasized that the representation of disabled individuals in media and culture is often lacking or misrepresented. Stereotypes and misconceptions can perpetuate stigma, making it difficult for those with disabilities to gain acceptance and understanding from society. By addressing these issues, Oliver called for a reevaluation of how disability is perceived and discussed in our cultural narrative.

The Inaccessibility of Public Spaces

Oliver pointed out the persistent inaccessibility of public spaces, despite regulations meant to enforce compliance with the ADA. Many buildings, transportation systems, and public facilities remain ill-equipped to accommodate individuals with disabilities. The host humorously but seriously illustrated how seemingly small oversights can accumulate, leading to significant obstacles for those who rely on accessibility features.

The episode showcased real-life examples of individuals who encounter barriers daily, such as inaccessible restrooms, public transportation that is not wheelchair-friendly, and the lack of proper accommodations in workplaces. These issues serve as a reminder that while laws exist, enforcement and practical application often fall short, leading to further marginalization of disabled individuals.

The Burden of Healthcare Inequities

Another crucial topic Oliver addressed was the inequities in healthcare faced by people with disabilities. The episode tackled the often frustrating and complicated relationship individuals with disabilities have with healthcare systems. Many disabled persons encounter difficulties accessing necessary medical care, receiving proper diagnoses, or obtaining adequate support services.

Oliver highlighted the stark reality that healthcare systems frequently prioritize cost over patient needs, which can lead to inadequate care for those with disabilities. This inequity is exacerbated by systemic issues such as lack of insurance coverage or high out-of-pocket costs for necessary treatments. The episode underscored the urgent need for reform in the healthcare system to ensure that individuals with disabilities receive the quality care they deserve.

The Financial Struggles of Disabled Individuals

Moreover, the episode delved into the financial struggles faced by many with disabilities. Oliver revealed how societal barriers and systemic discrimination can limit employment opportunities for disabled individuals. The fear of losing critical benefits often discourages individuals from seeking work, creating a cycle of poverty and dependence.

The episode pointed out that many disabled individuals live below the poverty line, with limited access to resources that could improve their quality of life. Oliver's discussion highlighted the need for comprehensive support systems that empower individuals with disabilities to achieve financial independence and stability.

The Importance of Representation and Advocacy

Throughout the episode, Oliver emphasized the importance of representation and advocacy for individuals with disabilities. He called for a more inclusive approach to policymaking and a push for representation in media to ensure that the voices of disabled individuals are heard and valued.

By uplifting disabled voices and experiences, society can foster greater understanding and empathy. Oliver urged viewers to engage in activism, advocating for policy changes that promote accessibility, equity in healthcare, and the dismantling of societal barriers that hinder disabled individuals from living fulfilling lives.

Conclusion: A Call to Action

John Oliver's recent episode on disability serves as a powerful reminder of the ongoing challenges faced by individuals with disabilities in society. By addressing the marginalization, inaccessibility, healthcare inequities, and financial struggles, the episode shone a light on the sad truth about disability—one that is often overlooked in public discourse.

As advocates for change, it is crucial that we continue to engage in conversations about disability, challenge societal norms, and push for inclusive policies that uplift and support disabled individuals. By doing so, we can work towards a more equitable society where everyone, regardless of their abilities, has the opportunity to thrive and be valued.

In the words of John Oliver, it is time to break down the barriers and ensure that the voices of those with disabilities are not just heard but amplified. Only then can we begin to address the systemic issues that have long persisted and work towards a brighter future for all.

I hope this blog provides a thoughtful overview of the important topics John Oliver touched on regarding disability and encourages further reflection and action on these crucial issues!

[saygeadvice]

Thank you, John Oliver.

Kids, as a transperson in America, we are not okay. This country is getting worse by the minute, and it was never in a great place to start with.

In my house, "hate" is one of the (very few) forbidden words. My 11 year old says the word "shit," and that's fine.

This word, though. This word is forbidden. It's an awful, powerful, meaningful, hurtful word.

I hate this country. I hate America with everything I have.

Which isn't much, because I'm fucking poor, like most Americans.

We are not okay.

They want us dead. They're coming after transpeople. More and more laws and bills get through all the time, and the system is broken.

No, not broken.

It behaves in exactly the way it's intended to. The system is not broken.

The system is rigged.

Last Week Tonight, March 16, 2022

[sammygender]

i find john winchester rly interesting and dislike a lot of wider fandom takes on him and when i think about him as a character i’m almost fond of him but i still like. totally 100% get it when people just fucking ferociously hate him. and i do too! i mean at the end of the day no matter how fascinating he is as a character, he’s an abusive father. he’s pretty directly responsible for all of sam and dean’s shit*. i feel like it’s understandable to vicariously hate him

[hypoxic-bean]

fuck richard gardener

[sarcasticscepticles]

I'm sure homeschooling is a better alternative for a lot of people, but it's also a very unregulated system, and there a lot of issues with it and some parents are 100% not qualified to be teaching their children.

Anyway enough lame gifted kid discourse we are in our 20s. Let's talk about how homeschooling in america should be fucking illegal it's insane lol

[leyavo]

Ghost getting badly injured during a mission that they have to call his next of kin.

Next of kin?? What do you mean next of kin.

Mrs Riley?! He doesn’t wear a wedding band to protect you. Not even at home, worried there’ll be a mark to show he sometimes wears one.

It’s then that the TF 141 find out he’s married to you. They’re all wondering what you’re like, convinced you must be in the same line of work.

You’ve been married for six years, only to be called if it’s serious like now.

Soap’s jaw is on the floor as you walk into the infirmary, you don’t even glance their way as you rush to Simon’s bedside. Your hand on his chest as you lean down to kiss his forehead and brush back his hair.

You’re well put together, a lightweight robe layered over jeans and a simple vest. Pops of colour on your olive thick framed glasses and golden wedged heels. Hair pinned back with a pencil, leather bag overpacked with a book, filofax, purse and little cosmetic bag.

Price introduces himself, shaking your hand. A dainty diamond ring sparkling on your finger. Your silver bangles jingle as you greet each man, repeating their names and they know Ghost has not told you anything about them.

All he told you is that he likes working alone, but sometimes works with others.

You stay at the base for a while till he’s well enough to travel home. Eating with him and the guys in the canteen, they’re still staring at Simon like he’s grown another head. Watching you two squabble about little things.

“Do not put that shit on my plate,” Simon grumbled.

“It’s broccoli not a bomb.” You can’t help but roll your eyes, shoulder bumping into his arm as you try to move him along in the line.

The art director job you have takes you all around the world, sometimes you get to meet up with your husband. Simon treating it like a mission in itself, you playing along as you talk to him over the phone as you walk the cobbled streets to see him. “Target engaged, moving in,” you whisper as you spot him standing outside a coffee shop.

FaceTiming him whilst he’s at base so you can show him the little trinket you found in an antique store. He’s laying down in his bed, headphones on so no one hears.

“Nearly the same age as you luv.” Anything to see that little poutie face and brows furrowed. He loves teasing you that you are older than him, but it backfires whenever he complains at his body aching. “You’re supposed to be young and spry.”

Being a couple years older than Simon, you’ve got your shit together. Which drew Simon to you. Both no nonsense, say what you feel and work it out. No games, no silent treatment.

“Watch your tone Si, you’re not in the army here. You’re home so don’t give me that shit.”

“Watch my tone, luv. You just flooded the bathroom!”

“You distracted me!”

“Why don’t I get some towels and we both sort it out.”

Once Simon’s fully recovered, you invite his team to stay at your shared home together for the weekend.

A cottage in the countryside, there’s an eclectic mix of vintage furniture and textiles. That one rug Simon shipped back from Morocco in the living room. Paintings, pottery and sculptures scattered around the rooms. Rocky, a German Shepard trailing after you as you give them a tour of the place.

You make friends with Price’s wife who’s around the same age as you. Even try to set Gaz up with a client you think he’d get on with. Bond with Soap telling him you lived in Scotland as a late teen where you had your first art assistant job there.

Price’s wife scheduling a double date in five months time. Simon side eying John. She’s also invited you to come stay for a girls weekend at the Price house.

[wife/gf masterlist]

[almadelsur]

💋 The Secrets One Keeps

summary: You're in love with jj but he's with kie, so in moments of pure desperation you often find yourself turning to the person he hates the most...rafe

warnings: some good old angsty pining, very very slight smut if you squint, fem!reader, one or two uses of y/n, plz let me know if I missed anything

a/n: SHE'S BACKKKK, so I've decided to completely reformat and re-post this fic with a few tweaks and editing considering i first wrote this like 3 years ago, and yes for those of you who have been asking, I fully intend to finallly continue this fic....more info on that later ;)

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・

JJ’s eyes change the moment Kiara steps into any room. Immediately his presence is ripped away from your immediate atmosphere, popping the little bubble you'd spent all afternoon crafting as he sprung up to greet the olive-skinned enigma that captured his affections.

“Kie!” The joy in his tone was incomparable to anything he’d directed at anybody else. Nothing could draw out such happiness from the blonde. You hated that about her.

In an attempt at self-defense, your brain shut itself off. Shielding you from processing the scene in front of you, your emotions ran cold like cement pouring down and across your neurons. It was the only way you could survive such a beating to your heart.

You figured that by distancing yourself mentally, you wouldn’t have to raise suspicion and distance yourself physically. In reality, you knew the real reasoning was your inability to stay away from JJ but the facade helped you cope.

“Hey J” she embraced him and his body relaxed around her as if she was the only source of his happiness. The only way he’d find alleviation from what he perceived as a shitty life being through her. “Sorry I’m late my parents had me running like crazy at the wreck today.”

Scattered greetings filled the air from the rest of the pogues, yet you could only focus on the way his eyes fixated on her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.

“Here come sit baby” he offered her the seat he had just previously been place holding. What you thought had been quality time with your best friend, presented itself to you now as momentary attention to pass the time until his actual desire arrived.

Settling herself down and offering you a wide smile, her shoulder bumped against yours gently as a sign of acknowledgment.

“Hey dude” she directed at you, but you didn’t reply. You just couldn’t bring yourself to pretend. Not today anyway. Instead, you offered her a small smile, it was minimal but it was the best you could do under the circumstances.

“Yo" A crumpled tissue paper flew at your head, jj attempting to refocus your attention on him, "didn’t you say you were gonna get some water or something?” He spoke up, the scheme evident in his tone.

“um yeah I guess” You lifted yourself up and took a few steps before jj used the opportunity to slump himself down where you had been sat and sprawled his arms across his girlfriend’s shoulders.

“snooze ya loose sucker” he joked as he turned to Kiara to start up some mindless conversation. Leaving you behind in the dust.

Your teeth gritted as you focused on making your way to the kitchen hoping the distance from the scene unfolding would lift the iron grip on your heart.

You made the fatal mistake of glancing back and you were met with the image of jj nuzzling up to kiara in a picturesque display of love. The lump building at the base of your throat indicated that it was your time to get the hell out of there before you broke down in front of everyone. 

“Shit guys, y’know what I just realized I gotta go” You spoke quickly, your tone matching your pace as you rushed to the exit of the chateau. 

“You’re still coming to the party later though right?” John B asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen in front of him. 

���Mhm yeah sure” you opened the door ready to depart. 

“Shit I forgot about that! Me and jj are gonna be late, we got dinner at the wreck tonight.” kiara added as you stepped out, unable to control the escape of a rogue tear.

“Date night babyyyy” You heard JJ cheer before you slammed the door behind you. 

“Is Y/N okay? She seemed a bit off.” Kie nudged JJ as she questioned. 

JJ furrowed his eyebrows momentarily. Glancing out the window, he saw you jog away from the house, and a brief flash of worry flashed through his mind. As quick as it came, it dissipated. He shook his head figuring that if there had been something wrong, he’d have been the first to know. 

“Nah she’s okay don't worry.” he offered to kie.

Boy was he mistaken. 

——————————————————————

“Fuuuck me” you moaned out, sinking into him one last time. You were hot, sweaty, and heaving as you pulled him out of you.

“I thought I just did” Rafe taunted leaning back to lie down, arms crossed behind his head causing his taut abdomen to flex.

You scrambled off the bed, picking up your garments and shoving them back on your body forcefully.

“What, no pillow talk?” He tried again.

“Rafe..” you trailed off. Whenever you’d finish fucking, you’d struggle to even look at him. The self-hatred flooded your body as soon as the orgasm poured out.

“Hey you called me” he eyed you intently but you knew he didn’t actually care. To rafe cameron everything was just a game. At this point it was pretty much common knowledge. “In fact” he moved closer to you so that he could speak directly into your ear “It’s always you that calls me.”

“Don’t be a dick” you stood up and eyed your heels contemplating whether you could face the walk back in them. “You know it makes me feel like shit.” It might have sounded brutal but that’s how things were with rafe.

“Yeah, it’s like you punctuate your orgasms with self-hate.”

“I'm a pogue, rafe.” You argued back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“So? Kooks and pogues can fuck you know.” You couldn’t comprehend why you were even having this conversation. Why now, why tonight.

“Yeah maybe, not you though.” You didn’t want to tell him the reason explicitly.

“I fuck pogues.”

“You fuck anyone.” The words came out almost instantly and without thinking, yet rafe took no offense.

“Exactly so what’s the issue?”

“The issue is, rafe.” You paused trying to find the words without actually having to say the words. “The issue is that if my friends found out they’d hate me, probably more than I already hate myself.”

He just chuckled, the look in his eyes changing as he figured you out.

“What's funny?” You challenged.

“You don’t have to bullshit me princess.” He looked up at you with a devilish glint in his eye. “You just don’t want jj knowing about your little escapades huh?” Bingo.

“He’s with Kiara.” You shrugged him off.

“Uh huh, you like him but you can’t have him.” Every word he spoke striking a nerve deep within you. “So you’re fucking me to fuck him over.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You grabbed your heels and shoved them on, wincing as you buckled them up.

“Don’t I?” He threw his joggers on lazily as he stood, the level dynamics changing significantly. The older boy towered over you. “Where are they tonight?”

“Back at John B’s, we had a little get-together.” You crossed your arms. More often than not you usually called rafe after a few drinks left you feeling lonely. “Sorry, your invite must have gotten lost in the mail.” You attempted to jab at him with sarcasm yet he clearly held the upper hand with his line of questioning. 

“So all of them are there now?” He stepped towards you.

“Mhm,” You lied.

“Even jj?” Moving closer until your neck was craned upwards to meet his eyes.

Taking your silence as an answer, he reached up and ran his palms across your upper arms, prompting you to uncross them.

“He was uh- him and kie should be getting there soon” You mumbled.

“So would i be wrong in guessing, that might have prompted your call then?” You let yourself be guided by his movements leaning your neck further back as his hand trailed up to your jawbone.

“rafe…” you called out insignificantly.

He leaned in and pressed his lips against your neck, right over where he could feel your pulse, and pressed down.

You couldn’t help the gasp that left your mouth. Because as much as your heart belonged to jj, rafe was just so fucking good at raising your temperature.

“Round two?” He mumbled against your neck.

“Yeah..” you attempted yet it came out as a whisper. He grabbed you swiftly and lifted you, moving you across the room and throwing you down onto his bed, crawling on top of you in a predatory manner as he did so. As your back hit the bed, the ringing of your phone brought you back from the haze he had you under. 

“Wait rafe stop stop” you pushed him off and grabbed the screeching mobile, pressing it up to your ear. “Hello?”

“Dude, where are you?” The sound of jj’s voice came through over the pumping sound of music and party chatter. “Me and Kie just got back and John B says no one’s seen you for like over an hour.”

“Oh I’m uh, I had to go do something for my mom” The lie pouring out of your mouth caused rafe to chuckle which was of course met by a slap from you signaling for him to be quiet.

“Oh well, when are you getting back? I have to tell you about this date. You’re gonna be so proud of me I actually think I’m ready to tell Kie I love her” you screwed your eyes shut as he spoke.

“Yeah I- you know what I can’t make it back my mom needs me to stay and help out but uh I’ll see you tomorrow or something.” You hung up before he could even reply, throwing your phone down uncaring of its state.

“What’s wrong? They getting hitched?” Rafe spoke up from behind you.

You turned to Rafe, the fire in your veins pushing your arms to grab him, roughly pulling him back onto you.

“Just shut up and fuck me rafe.”

And fuck you he did.

——————————————————————

The next morning you woke up to the sight of rafe’s bare back. Not much of a cuddler, you figured.

Quietly you pushed the covers off and began to dress yourself back up. As you got to your shoes you sighed and shook your head, as if there was any way in hell you were going to walk home in heels. You scooped up your shoes and your now-cracked phone shaking your head, slightly ashamed at your outburst.

Without even a second glance at the sleeping body you were leaving behind, you made your way over to the door. As you turned the knob and stepped out to leave, a husky voice spoke up.

“I’ll keep my ringer on for you babe.”

You rolled your eyes looking back at him, “Fuck you rafe.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on.” He didn’t even open his eyes as he answered, instead just rustling around in the bed and turning to the other side, once again facing his back to you.

You scoffed as you exited. Your internal rant clouded your vision, body on autopilot with an excellent self-navigation of the Cameron house from the countless times you’d made this exit.

“Y/N?” The gentle voice wiped your thoughts clean as the shock stilled you dead in your tracks, slowly turning to come face to face with none other than Sarah.

“Sarah” you drawled out. “What are you doing here?”

“It’s my house?” Her head was cocked to the side, equally shocked to see you.

“No I just mean- I thought you were spending the night at John B’s.” You forced the small talk, avoiding the topic of why you were here, sneaking out at 8 in the morning.

“He had to work today, did you spend the night here?” She glanced up at the door of rafe’s bedroom.

“Umm-“ There had only been two other instances where you had been at a complete loss for words. The day jj told you he and Kiara were dating, the morning after your first sexual encounter with rafe, and now this.

“Are you sleeping with my brother?!” She whisper-shouted, eyes wide as the realization hit her. Busted.

“No?”

“Oh my god!” She grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to her room, slamming the door as soon as you were both inside. “How long has this been going on?!” Her tone was loud and her hands wild as she interrogated you.

“Just a little under a year.” You sat on her bed and looked at your lap as you spoke. Reminiscent of a child being scolded.

“A year?! Oh my god!” She repeated. “Who knows about this?!”

With that, you looked up at her desperately. “No one. No one knows so please don’t tell them.” You didn’t have to name names for her to know who you were referring to.

“Are you two like” she paused “together?” She scrunched her nose up, disgusted at the thought of her bully of an older brother dating anyone.

“No god no. It’s just sex” you were just as uncomfortable as Sarah was, having to tell her about boning her older brother.

“Disgusting.” She turned away from you with her arms crossed, looking out the window.

“Look I’m not proud of it okay? Just-“ You sighed “Just please don’t tell anyone” pleading again.

Sarah let out a long sigh and uncrossed her arms. She walked over to you and joined you on the bed, her eyes showing concern mixed with something you couldn’t quite place your finger on.

“I thought you were into jj” she spoke softly, there it was. Pity.

“Yeah well, jj is with kie and instead of sitting around wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it.” As the words left your mouth, you realized how weak the explanation was.

“So you just use rafe to bang the jj out of you.”

“It’s not like Rafe cares, if anything he’s also using me.” You tried to reason.

“I don’t doubt that. But I mean, that’s- It’s not healthy, you’ll never move on if you don’t actually process your emotio-“

“Look Sarah, I don’t need to do any of that shit okay? What I have here works, when I fu- when I’m with rafe, I don’t think about jj.” Tears began to swell in your eyes “Sleeping with rafe helps me forget about everything, even if it’s only for a little while he uh- he makes me feel good.” To an extent, there was truth behind your words, while you and rafe fucked the rest of the world went away. It was only after, that the crippling self-hatred hit you along with the return of your immense feelings for jj. 

Sarah shuffled over and threw her arm around you. “That’s not good for you, it’s just momentary. It’s easy and it's a cycle, you’re never going to get better going down this path. Especially not with rafe.”

“Rafe he’s- he’s not that bad.”

“Yes he is. But i bet it gives you satisfaction fucking him knowing jj hates him. Feels like revenge right?” She’d always been so perceptive your Sarah, you hated how she could see right through you.

Tears ran down your cheek silently. “You’re not gonna tell anyone right?” You sniffled.

She gave you one of those classic salt-of-the-earth Sarah Cameron smiles, the kinda smile that would light up any room she walked into. “Takin' it to the grave babe.”

A loud beeping caused both your heads to whip towards the window. “Shit, I completely forgot I was supposed to go on the HMS with pope and jj, we were gonna chill there until John B and Kie finished work.” She rose to her feet and extended an arm towards you. “Wanna come? Or we could drop you home if you’re not up for it.”

With a sigh you took her hand and pulled yourself up, walking beside her as you mentally prepped yourself to face the blonde you desperately pined for.

“Well rise and shine campers.” jj yelled out of the window of the drivers seat.

“Y/N! Where you been dude? you totally bailed last night.” Pope was next to speak as you and Sarah filed into the Twinkie. As JJ began to drive you avoided any form of eye contact in his general direction.

“I had to go help my mom out, blackout at mine again.” You didn’t even look at pope either, instead focusing your attention on the blur of trees and houses pacing by the window as JJ sped down the winding roads.

“Isn’t that what you were wearing last night?” pope, observant as always, pointed out.

“Uh yeah, I didn’t really get any time to change cause…”

“I called her last night when I got home, I was so drunk I don’t think I was ready to stop the party.” Sarah covered for you.

“Yeah I wrapped up helping my mom out and then this one calls me talkin bout a sleepover or something so I didn’t exactly have much time to change.” 

Thankfully pope had lost interest as soon as he had asked the question, otherwise, your overcompensating ass would have been caught out straight away. You always had to add to the lie until you felt like you had sold it completely.

Keeping your eyes trained on the outside meant that jj’s frown directed at you through the windscreen mirror went completely undetected. He always knew whenever there was something up with you and right there and then he knew something definitely was.

“Hey, you okay?” He didn’t need to address you explicitly for you to know he was talking to you.

“Yeah just tired.” You shrugged him off in an attempt to distance yourself from him yet again.

He knew you were lying but he didn’t understand why, you never lied to each other. Apart from John B, the pair of you were closer to each other than with anybody else in the group. You’d been best friends since kindergarten, and since then you’d sworn 3 things to each other.

1- You’d always share your snacks.

2-You’d always be best friends even if you argued.

 3- You would never ever lie or keep secrets from each other.

Of course, as the both of you grew older the rules became more and more lax. The snack sharing was limited only to when you felt nice enough and sometimes you’d go for days without making up if you had argued particularly badly. Having kept two friendship-breaking secrets from him, the childhood rules seemed pretty insignificant by now.

“Mhm,” he responded, flickering his eyes between you and the road. “Are we taking you home to change first?”

“Yeah, I don’t know if I’ll join you guys afterward though.” You chewed down on your nail anxiously as the tension from being in the same space as jj paired with the guilt from having fucked rafe prior, suffocated you.

JJ made a face as he focused on the road, something was wrong with you and he’d be dammed if he wasn’t going to put his everything into finding out what that was.

[thebibliosphere]

Whenever I talk about the medical neglect and ableism I've encountered as a victim of the healthcare system, there's always some cockwaffle who feels entitled to come into my inbox and make the argument of "not all doctors" while talking about how "people like them" (because it's always someone in a field of medicine who does this) are doing their best and it's really hard because so many people fake being ill to get on welfare (Yikes), but like, yeah, obviously #not all doctors, because if all doctors were negligent, bullying scum bags, I'd be dead.

But here's the thing: while I truly believe that the majority of doctors are doing their best in a system stacked against them and their patients, their presence does not negate the mass harm caused by the bad ones. And there are far more bad ones than you realize.

Fuck, John Oliver literally did a segment on this last week:

Yes, the truly bad, malicious doctors are in the minority. Most are just horrifically burned out and fighting a losing battle against a system, killing both them and their patients through a lack of funding and resources and profound overwork.

But the malicious ones do exist, and they will go out of their way to harm patients who don't kowtow to them.

I almost lost my life because when I was in my early twenties, I told a doctor I didn't think she was listening to me, and I disagreed with her assessment of my mental health (she was not a mental health doctor, and I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain). She retaliated by putting "non-compliant" in my file.

There was also a fun little "doesn't show respect" note too that lives rent-free in my head because I know I wasn't rude. I was polite. I just didn't agree with her, and my refusal to accept her off-handed comment that "you probably have bipolar or BPD" (again, I was there for heart palpitations and chronic pain) meant I was "refusing care."

I wasn't. I just refused to be slapped with a mood/personality disorder when I was there because I kept fucking fainting when I stood up.

(Spoiler alert: it was dysautonomia)

That "non-compliant" marker followed me around for years. It followed me across an ocean and effectively ensured that any doctor I saw was going to treat me like absolute dogshit because no one wants to help Difficult Patients. It wasn't until I was so undeniably ill, literally on the brink of death, that anyone helped me.

I'm alive because of a good doctor. And all the good ones that came after him because of him.

So, I know they exist. You don't have to tell me that.

But I really fucking need you to acknowledge the bad ones and that you're part of a system with a long, long history of abusing minorities and vulnerable people. I need you to acknowledge that because it's the only way we're going to survive this godforsaken nightmare and make things better.

So yeah, #notalldoctors, but if you feel the need to say that because someone talking about being literally left to die by the medical system hurts your feelings, I'm going to have to ask you to take a step back and ask yourself if you're going into medicine for the right reasons.

Namely: do you want to help people, even the "difficult" ones?

Even the ones who might disagree with you?

Even if they're on welfare?

Even if they'll never get "better" in a way that means "cured"?

Just a thought. But hey, what do I know. I'm just someone who experienced hemolytic anemia because doctors kept telling me I was anxious and needed to exercise more 🤷‍♀️.