#It felt like he remembered them
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The implications that Blade and Dan Heng remember more than they admit is driving me nuts
#Fragments and scraps#I talk too much#I should probably delete this later#Not just Blade's general drive but already what Kafka said about how she was going to take off his mind#the memories of Jing Yuan‚ Jingliu‚ Dan Heng *and Yingxing* made me think he remembers a lot more than he lets on#And then Todd's quest? How he is watching the High Elder statue‚ wonders if that guy was happy‚ and tells us he is 'mourning for folly'?#And that short line uttered in that precise location after this animated short seems even more meaningful#And then Dan Heng? The way he is there? The way he knows where to he at all?#And he pours the drink and it's almost a shared drink beyond time. Once again. Like they did before#Like the wish mentioned in that one leaked Imbibitor Lunae character story. He did get it. In a way. He did get it#The way Dan Heng gazes with eyes full of tenderness and sorrow also seems to imply that he remembers somewhat#Perhaps not all. Perhaps there's not even the feeling#But it feels a bit like mourning lost friends. A bit like the gaze Jing Yuan can't help but give him at times#Perhaps not a lingering feeling Dan Heng has‚ but at least the echo of a love that once was#It also felt like he was seeing them for a moment#It felt like he remembered them#'I am not him'‚ he claims‚ over and over. And he is not wrong. But it seems like the fondness Dan Feng had for his friends#transcended the barriers of death and accompanied him to his next life somewhat#And after centuries of nothingness still Dan Heng can't help but give a tender sorrowful smile to the friends that were#It's heartbreaking that something in the four of them is still mourning‚ each in their way and as they can#What is Blade's and Jingliu's drive for revenge if not that? What is Blade's 'mourning for folly' if not that?#What is Kafka unable to control Blade's mara in the Luofu if not that? What are Jing Yuan's bouts of tiredness‚ the pressure on his chest‚#the way he welcomed his old friends with a joke? What is it if not that the fact that‚ yes‚ after using them‚ but that he let them go?#What is the weight of Dan Heng's smile and his gesture pouring the drink if not that?#No wonder they can't move on if they loved each other so much it transcended duties‚ time‚ life‚ death and madness#Edit: as per Jingliu's quest this was obviously confirmed‚ especially and most intensely in Blade's case (19/10/2023)
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wish these guys had more moments together,,, maybe even a little kiss,,, it'd be so cool
#i ship these two so hard but i honestly cant remember why. i think it was the one cooking scene. it felt so domestic to me#riker making eggs that taste nasty to everyone except worf who is enjoying them like they're the best thing ever made. i love them#worfriker#worf#will riker#tng#the next generation#star trek#star trek fanart#fanart#art#and YES i gave worf a lion tail. he deserves it#i like to think klingons would add spikes and stuff to their tails if they had them. useful little weapons
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did a little sketch yesterday that i really liked and tried to get it done today just so i got literally anything to post- but i fell into the trap of 'making sketches to elaborate and thus really stiff and non fun' (for me), ... soooooo .. im redoing the whole thing
but the idea was a mummy ganondorf for my (yes still existing) totk rewrite; i wanted to make him more scary looking and also emphasize just how horrid it must be to be kept in between life and death by having your heart grabbed by a cold and vengeful magical hand for thousands of years (in this case the ancient queen .. which i also tried to sketch despite not showing up aside from her dissolving hand)
the spell starting to fail and his body being more damaged in some parts (jaw being only the bones left for example) and his chest open from being slowly eaten up by the queens magic, the ribs contorting around it like its a gravitational pull- sounds cooler than it looks bc this sketch did not work out, so im saving the details for the .. hopefully, better version
#ganondoodles#art#tloz#ganondorf#posting it mainly ... to have something to post#and bc i think i remember someone telling me they like that i soemtimes post 'failed' sketches or paintings that i wont go back to#anyway ... this is one of them ...... felt rly pressured bc the weekends already over again and i dont want to work ......#was probably doomed from the start- detailed sketches rarely work out ofr me lol#anyway- also havent decided yet if i want him to have a heart still ... or if it too was dissolved by her magic#and you can still hear his heartbeat even though there is nothing in his chest#or maybe only like ... a spirit .. non physical heart ....#or its 'just' made of malice#.... or he doesnt have it at the very start and then at the mid fight he rebuild it somewhat#and for the end you find him in a tangled mess of pulsing roots like those that were in canon totk (but didnt mean shit i guess)#bc hes literally taking the life of the land to be as strong as he could possibly be#but like ... cool#i also have plans for a “demon” version and the good old boar#three phases and none is a cinematic thing#he will be a dark souls boss and you are way too low level ... i can do whatever i want in this rewrite you cant stop me!!#'kids have to play this gam-' no they dont this is in my head forever!!! no one is playing it but me!!
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Drawing Woody Pride and Buzz Lightyear entirely from memory after not having watched the movies in over 6 years :D
No reference, no rewatching. I was RAWDOGGING this shit, man ‼️💥💥⁉️💥
Meme references under cut
#I compared my wack ass long-term memory renditions of Woody and Buzz with the actual references and.. ...... I WAS SO OFF FOR BUZZ ADGTERHJJ#HIS SWIRL THING WAS ON HIS FUCKING CHIN- I KNEW SOMETHING FELT OFF#I'm not even going to mention the suit because that was a disaster#also like- one of the Main Things I remembered about Woody was that he had really dainty looking hands which I find hilarious#not even in size or anything- just the way he held 'em around#INCREDIBLY disappoited to discover that Woody didn' have freckles because I GENUINELY. WITH GOD AS MY WITNESS thought he had freckles#It might have been Jessie actually- I may have mixed them up.#yeah I think Jessie had freckles#ANYWAYS#my art#toy story#toy story woody#woody pride#toy story buzz#buzz lightyear of star command#buzz lightyear#toy story fanart#also idk why but I remember Buzz always having like- at least half of his helmet/plastic dome thing open? like a little hood? idk if that's#just me but I remember it so clearly
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North and Simon: (shaking hands on killing Simon potentially)
#detroit become human#north wr400#simon pl600#markus rk200#josh pj500#jericho is just... so funny to me as like. how they function (or dont)#like im v glad that i did a Good Job my first run and no one hated me but i also felt like a very distraught parent#in regards to how markus is just able to either hurt them (by suggestions OF THE OTHERS IN THE GROUP)#or help them because hey what the fuck i just dragged simon to safety and now north wants me to kill him#and then simon like oh no north got shot you should leave her BUT ! i saved her and made simon happy#so its like you know what they have to have some animosity but also respect#i feel like i wanna see more of north and simon being buddies ... and i might have to do that myself#but i also apologize if this is ooc for them because i really did only just play through once and got a not good end#i probably missed a lot of lore and stuff so im v sorry if im Messing Them Up#its currently just me liking their designs and vibes and hoping im not ruining other fans lives by being wrong#and i honestly dont know when north would kill simon but hes on her possible victims list#so since both of their victim lists include themselves for suicide it just reminded me of the meme#with im so mad im gonna (remembers suicide jokes are bad for my mental health)#and it was like yeah watch north be like im gonna (well if i cant kill myself because markus said no suicide) murder someone
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BASSIST BEOMGYU BASSIST BEOMGYU BASSIST BEOMGYU BASSIST BEOMGYU
#forgot to talk about how I felt when band beomkai performed at that awards show#I died.#I absolutely love when txt do more live and instrumental and musical kind of stuff bc i have always said they suit live band so much#also just a soft spot whenever the members play instruments for me#like I love huening kai wants to start a band so much#ALSO SKIPPING STONES#I love beomkai#they are my favourite txt duo#drummer kai was so impressive like playing the drums is so hard and he was also SINGING and like the drums is just so hard#I remember I had one lesson once and I was like nah#but also I play classical Indian drums and also as a bassist#rhythm and being on time is so important and also so hard#bc if you’re out of time just a little it affects everything#so both of them AKSJSJDHJD€€(£ THEY DID SO GOOD#BEOMGYU AND BASS ?!!!^ MY 2 FAV THINGS IN THE WORLD#THE FACT HE’D NEVER PLAYED BEFORE WAS VERY IMPRESSIVE#although I’m judging he used a pick…/j#but I listened very carefully to his bass playing bc it wasn’t picked up that well but I was actually very impressed#his solo was actually quite difficult and he learnt it very quickly like I’m very impressed#I’m also looking respectfully at his hands#he is literally shin from nana now like I have been saying for years#one day I’ll make my blog nana and txt themed#for a little while it was kinda#anyway#idk what I’m talking about#BAND BEOMKAI#DRUMMER KAI#BASSIST GYUNSBDBF#nia speaks !#beomgyu !<3
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[OLD ART ALERT] A COLLECTION OF SCENES FROM THE GILLIONS CATSCRATCH ARC THAT BROUGHT ME GREAT JOY. i love fishy chips especially when its just gillion being delirious and violent and hostile
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#jrwi riptide spoilers#JUST NOTICED A MILLION MISTAKES FUUUUUUUUCK BUT WWHATEVERRRRR IF I STARE AT THIS ANYMORE IM GONNA HHUURRRLLL#SO I REALLY LIKE FISH AND CHIPS RIGHT. IVE BEEN IN LOVE W THE SHIP EVER SINCE THAT NAT 20 KISS#BUT I THINK I SHIP IT WRONG. OR LIKE. I AM CORRECT BUT EVERYONE SHIPS THEM DIFFERENTLY#THE FISH N CHIPS I SEE EVERYWHERE ELSE IS SO FLOWERY AND SWEET AND ROMANTIC. AND THATS NICE! THAT STUFFS NEAT#but gillion and chip would NEVERRRR enter anything similar to a romantic relationship. chips too damaged and gillions too uninterested#I LIKE MY FISH N CHIPS ONE SIDED AS FUCK#bc 2 gillion chip is his best friend in the whole wide world but hes also kinduvagross little man that took him a MINUTE to really warm up2#but to CHIP gillion is this powerful and gorgeous and heroic paragon of destiny and his best friend in the whole world who will#bring about the eschaton. 'i didnt believe in destiny until i met you' until i met a champion radiating with a light thatll alter the world#OHH REMEMBER THE FIRST ICE ARENA?he was so mad.still probably shaking from the ordeal.NEVER had he felt true divine radiance CLEAVE through#his SOUL like that.do you remember that moment in the forest w the bugs. an alien from the ocean; lacerating the land w lightning#when the realization flickered in chip for a moment.that the thing standing before him was more powerful than he could ever fathom#remember when grizz mentioned that the nat20 kiss was the 'best kiss chip ever experienced'. that has nothing to do w this. where was i.#LOST MY TRAIN OF THOUGHT. BUT HEY. I THINK at the beginning chip absolutely knew that gill was smth grand n powerful n scary#when gillion revealed what exactly the prophecy was;chip got defensive and mad.sure he was sleep deprived but OOH. HES SCARED!#he believes gillion too! he believes that his destiny is to eradicate either the sea or land and that scares him!#but then he gets past it bc ultimately he trusts his bestfriend gillion so so much. he fuckin loves this dude.#he would throw himself intothe path of fire for this dude. he would boat across the ocean for this dude.he would build arenas for this dude#even if this dude will end half the world.even if this dude wields the power and the obligation to eradicate him at any second.#even if this dude is going to throw himself into harms way for his own comrades.even if this dude is just going to sacrifice himself.#one way or another one shall die for the other.these self-sacrificial bastards click so well with eachother!!#chip believes his body is best used to pave roads and gill believes his body is destined to pave prosperity.WHATEVER!!#i really love their dynamic!! they care for eachother so much!in MY heart tho. the icing on the cake here is the fantasy that chip is#just a bit more In Love w gillion than he realizes. like this powerful fish guy is HOT and PRETTY and KIND and FUNNY and LOYAL and STRONG#but gillion would never rly feel that same sort of attraction towards chip. its just not rly his thing. aroace as fuck man.#thats how it is in MY little heart atleast. and i sit here and play w my touys in my brain n i explore my silly lil one sided fish y chips.
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what's weird about the fantasy high drama is that like. it seems to me like people forget d&d is primarily a) a game you play with your friends and also b) luck based.
I mean it's fine to say that "nothing felt like a challenge" and "they just dominated everything and there weren't any stakes" but like. it's not as if they weren't up against huge threats. they lost the mall fight. the last stand was an onslaught of enemies. they fought a dozen dragons from an airship. the fights were hard. they're just really good. they've had very good dice luck in general this season and are all very high level and highly specialized. fig is gonna beat deception and performance checks. adaine's gonna figure out the arcana. riz is gonna succeed investigations. like. for some reason their strategical competence and wisely picked abilities are. a downside? a disappointment?
the thing about d&d that you need to remember is it's first and foremost a game. it's mostly random and it takes you down weird paths and you're playing to have fun with your friends. the dice are literally telling the story that it's their time, it's their year. they've struggled enough. they've trained enough. they're good at what they do. and in my post about the academic/domestic/personal stressors being the focus, d&d doesn't have any other system to work them out than rolling different skills. that's what d&d is. brennan set specific challenge levels for different tasks and the players strategized to prioritize which abilities they were strongest in. the challenges were there. and the players rose to them. they were both smart in their delegation of responsibilities and lucky with their dice rolls. of which, both are foundations of d&d.
don't mistake them being good players and getting lucky with there being no hardship. just because they smashed through the wall, that doesn't mean the wall wasn't strong. they were just stronger.
#i know some people are disappointed from a storytelling perspective. but you have to understand.#what was brennan supposed to do. he threw things at them both at and above their challenge level#he created a whole system to simulate academic and person goals and stress throughout the year#he gave them plenty of chances to fail#he set DCs high.#the players just knocked it out of the park#you can't tell any story but the ones the dice want you to#if he had manufactured more danger or difficulty where there was none it would have felt cheap#and do you not remember the night yorb fight#like. the whole point of the year was that it wasn't hard. it just never stopped#they can do it they're capable they're smart. but the hustle and the stress and the fighting and the working never ends#that's why nothing 'had stakes' or 'felt challenging'#it's the slog that gets you. it's how long you're willing to keep going.#how much life can break you almost to your last breath but you get through it and you keep going anyway#but. i digress.#and i say all this with complete and total respect to other people's opinions#i feel no hate and wish no bad feelings on anyone who disagrees with this!#it's just my personal view on the whole thing#sorry if im being annoying i just have. opinions.#fantasy high#d20#dimension 20#fhjy
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time to make your choice only you can be the one
#undescribed#bonk.png#ggg#great god grove#great god grove spoilers#ggg spoilers#<- bc of king n hand gesturing stuff for the au this one gets the spoiler tag#caption is a line from legend of everfree from eg movie of the same name bc its now linked to ggg for me bc of brainrot#first au stuff i dont like have anything really planned out n also dont really plan on doing anything with this beyond doodles#settled on inspekta being a horse bc i want him capochin patty n king to all be earth ponies bc of like permanent having it ingrained from#being an mlp fan as a kid that earth ponies are seen as less special bc they cant use magic or fly n that fits for story similarities#bc inspekta n capochin hating on patty for projection reasons AND inspekta's replacement anxiety n envy of king who in the au#is the only other earth pony lined up to become an alicorn (bc again being specifically an fim fan since i was a kid ingrained in with fanon#that ponies that become alicorns are almost exclusively pegasus or unicorn bc of earth ponies not having as clear of a connection to magic)#in my mind patty is the main character like the bizzyboys are also main characters but its like how the mane six are the main six but#twilight is the MAIN main character its like that n then godpoke is her sidekick (like spike ig but like mysterious stranger style <- idk#what i mean by this) she gets to be the protag bc the type of character godpoke is in the game n how im fitting them to be in the au doesnt#really work for a protag role while patty can be more readily slotted into mlp protag shes the only bizzyboy who cares about solving in the#game (as shown in hobbyhoo) n i like her so she gets to be the protag v-v inspekta is still doing the whole like shit from the game just in#a different way bc of mlp related restrictions n tone differences. the episode where luna goes to nightmare night after being freshly reform#ed walked so milldread section could run however cobigail's deal does run closer to that episode that to the game counterpart but like witho#ut cob having been banished for a thousand years theres no rift in the au bc its. mlp so sort of vague direction is related to the tree of#harmony n like maybe thats how inspekta powers up for the two parter transformation. a thought i had for a workaround for how inspekta keeps#king isolated was maybe turning king to stone n hiding her in plain sight but while that would slide in mlp (they turn a child to stone in t#he series finale apparently??) it leaves a bad taste in my mouth from the ggg angle so probably gonna do something else#art comments both inspekta n cobigail's pony names are taken from ponies i already had inspekta's comes from a different mlpied thing#n cobigail's comes from a fankid (spelled like kandi corn tho bc fankid's a rave girlie) the rest of the gods get to keep their names aside#from maybe bauhauzzo (whos role is undecided) huzzle n click clack arent ponies bc i felt it suited them more huzzle gets to be discordesc#bc i think its fun if like this versions god of chaos wasnt evil BUT that angle is used as slander against huzzle by inspekta#n click clack's a breezy bc small n bratty (we will be ignoring that breezies are mortal if i remember right bc thats not relevant)
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Founders era is really fucking funny because at any other point in the timeline you have a category of “people that were once in a lifetime prodigies S rank shinobi feared throughout all nations”. And then you have founders where you have that but also a small 2 people box that says “oh and here are the guys who were basically gods. They should not be compared with anyone else. Cartographers were kinda busy because every fight of theirs changed maps”. And you’re like huh. Ok. Well. That’s a thing I guess
#in comparison to them even the strongest felt inadequate#madara uchiha#hashirama senju#naruto#naruto shippuden#naruto founders#founders era#senju tobirama#uchiha izuna#like if those two were born at any other point in time they would be the geniuses everyone remembers#meanwhile izuna got sidelined which I’m still mad about#that’s not madaras fault and he would also be mad about it
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i think you should brag more about getting laid. someone has to around here
🫡
#i will be oversharing in the tags again because i had so fun ok ok ok. it was so nice. im still reeling a bit#im making the first couple tags long so they go under the cut in case any1 does not want to read this. blah blah blah blah blah blah blah#ok that should do it. as i was saying#at one point when i was feeling a bit shy taking my sports bra off he promised to keep his eyes closed until i told him he cld open them#(i have some chest dysphoria and wasnt sure how i was gonna navigate it in an intimate setting)#but then i sorta paused cuz i remembered i got this pair of black sheer + lace thigh high stockings recently but hadnt worn em much yet#so i was like waitwait keep em closed one sec. and I put them on and when i told him to open his eyes he was like 👀👀👀#i forgot all abt my previous anxieties#anyways the stocking material felt really nice to rub all over his neck + shoulders + chest when he was inside me#ANYWAYS. im high#oh oh also the whole time we wr at it he was wearing a pair of pastel pink pusheen the cat socks he recently got as a white elephant gift 😂#he later pointed out how funny the contrast was between the two
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So I read A Stitch in Time and one result of that which I was certainly not expecting was that I feel so much sympathy for Enabran Tain. Garak's life is a tragedy, but Tain's is a fucking black comedy.
I mean, he's a terrible person and an absolute shitbag, but can you imagine? You have this kid. You go to all the trouble of arranging for him to be raised in a family situation where he won't be rejected from society for being your bastard. You get him into the nicest indoctrination school where he can hobnob with plenty of uppercrust kids. You get him a job in your Order and all the proper training. And he's actually, like, really good at it. But he has this fatal flaw of being completely incapable of not making stupid, short-sighted, emotional decisions.
A scene I imagine has to have happened just prior to Garak and Tain's confrontation at the end of part II:
Like goddamn. When Tain asked "what's your plan for getting rid of her husband?" and Garak's just like "plan what plan." Dude. I'M disappointed, I can only imagine the guy who's job it is to know and plan for everything isn't at least as disappointed.
I know he didn't actually, but do you think there was ever a time when Tain wanted to be like, You know what. Just go back to Tolan and become a gardener. Join that illegal hippie cult. It's fine.
#enabran tain#<tagging mostly in case anyone has him blocked bc i get it.#a stitch in time#elim garak#ds9 the garyalmor rewatch#(obviously not technically part of the rewatch but that's mostly a timing tag for organizing my opinions)#can't believe this is the second time i've compared tain to a character from teen wolf. BUT IT WONT BE THE LAST#I was reading apolesen's fantastic Love in a Time of Oppression and for some reason it made me remember a fic i read last year by#GoddessofBirth called There Are Many Names in History (but none of them are ours). which. yeah that's probably bc of the doomed nature of#a prequel romance. but also Chris Argent and Garak both win the 'i'm sorry your dad is the literal worst' award. Anyway I've always felt#like I *should* get a Tywin Lannister vibe off of Tain. like this is the guy who orchestrated the red wedding. who fucked up his kids so ba#he died from it. But I don't. I can definitely agree to a Gerard Argent vibe though. The 'you though you were laying out some kind of#dynasty but in actuality your son is a better person than you and everything you have ever striven for has been undone' sort of vibe#100
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Yall ever think about how Zane is a seer with prophetic dreams of the future, but he's also a robot with memory problems who struggles to maintain his sense of self? Like. He's condemned to see a future he cannot prevent, yet cursed to long for a past he cannot recall. His dreams are filled with the vestiges of tragedies yet to come, but never the tragedies he wishes he could remember. Do you think he ever used to get disappointed when he'd have prophetic dreams, upset that it was another vision of the future but not of the past he so desperately wished to understand?
Anyway I'm gonna start biting people
#do you think the ice emperor ever experienced zanes sixth sense?#did he ever get visions?#i wonder what the visions were like. i wonder how he felt about them#did the ice emperor ever have visions foretelling the day his friends come to save him?#did he see dreams of him in ninjago again surrounded by loved ones?#dide the ice emperor has a vision of himself in a field having long since shed the armor hes worn for 50 years?#surrounded by grass and sun and springtime. the winter is over#he and some other people are laughing and eating bountiful food. it is serene and peaceful#he wakes up but cant remember the faces of the people in the dream#he doesnt know if its a dream or a vision but either way it haunts him. he doesnt know why#20 years later he is back in ninjago and he and his friends have a picnic#the dream has come true. zane looks around and sees not friends but the blurry-faced ghosts that haunted him for so long#ninjago#zane julien#zane ninjago#destiny post
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As promised, here's that fusion post for the three people that asked for it (drops it and runs).
Ford thinks of himself and Stan as one, an extension of each other, and lowkey hates that its not true nor possible.
And Mabel really shouldn't have shown him Steven Universe because now he's obsessing over the concept of fusions and his desire to be one with stan.
Now lets say this is Pre-Weird and everything is still tense between them and they aren't exactly talking but despite that ford still wants to be close and he knows stan does too.
He can see it in the broken resigned looks Stan keeps throwing his way. And listen, Ford isn't the best at communication but he can fix this. He may still be angry and self righteous and an asshole but he can fix them.
So now he spends an even more absurd amount of time in the lab trying to making it his reality and entirely disregards his base needs to the point even dipper is concerned.
He has a journal dedicated to this idea where he keeps all his notes and theories on how to make it possible. Would he have to alter their DNA for it to work or could it be possible for them as they are?
While doing the tests and research for his fixation he remembers a dimension he briefly travelled to back when he was younger and fresh through the portal. One where this concept, his desire, his fantasy, his wish was real. A dimension where it was was their culture, their way of life. And while he did think it was interesting then, he was young and angry and raw with unrestrained hurt. Too emotional to stop and study the practice the way he should have.
He beats himself up over it now. If only he had been thinking more logically him and stan could be one already. They wouldn't have to be so... apart.
He doesn't have time to dwell on his shortcomings though. He has to figure this out. He doesn't know exactly why but he feels like he's running out of time. Like he has to do this now or he'll never have the chance again.
Eventually he has his prototype and it functions well... enough. He just has one more trial to run. Except Stan comes down to check on him. 'Worried ford isn't taking care of himself properly.' or something like that.
And honestly, Stan in his space is the last thing he expects because they have an unspoken agreement. Stan roams above and Ford stays down here. And when they cross paths they both look the other way.
But stan is here and yes Ford is annoyed at first but this also means he doesn't have to go seek stan out.
"I told you to stay- wait actually this is perfect. We'll do it now," Ford fiddles with his device, turning it on and he really isn't thinking right anymore. He know the device works and that's all that matters.
"Do what now? Stanford, what is that," And Stan is kinda terrified because Ford looks... well he looks kinda like how he did decades ago when he had sent that postcard and Stan had come running because well, its Ford.
Ford looks insane, primal and unhinged, like he hasn't seen the light of day in weeks. And Dipper had told Stan, had been worried but Stan brushed it off because Ford locking himself in the lab and avoiding everybody, avoiding him wasn't a new development.
But now Stan’s worried because that wild-eyed look is directed at him again and the cowardly little animal in him is screaming at him to run.
It’s like Ford knows what he's thinking because before Stan has a chance to decide if he's going to shut down or entertain that scared little animal, Ford is grasping at him and pulling him deeper into the dingy little basement.
Stan trips and he fully expects his back to hit the floor but fords got and arm wrapped low on his back that keeps him from falling fully. And stan's hand is also tangled in fords sweater so even if Ford had let him fall, well they would have gone down together.
But then he catches sight of that thing again and it looks vaguely like a gun and why did he have to get saddled with the insane twin? He doesn't even have time to flinch because a bright light floods his vision and he blanks.
For a second, Stan's mind goes black and there's a strange humming in his ears. But then he hears a laugh he hasn't heard in forever. Soft and joyous and for a moment stan smiles. It's Ford's laugh.
Because he and Stan become one. And everything is warm and bright and as it should be. For a moment everything is right. It feels like coming home.
His-Their eyes open and Ford's confused? No, Stans confused.
"Sixer? Lee?" Their voice says, soft and bewildered. They look around, searching for each other. Stan? Ford? Where did they go? They look down and their vision swims. Four hands, five fingers? Six? It all blurs together.
Is this me, they think as one. Finally as one. Four hands run up the sides of their one body then stretch out for their wide eyes to view. Ford can feel his giddiness rising unbidden. And a whisper from Stan, rising to meet Ford. Uncertain but matching nonetheless.
Finally
Finally together... Finally fixed... Finally right.
They spin slowly, as if that will give them a better view of what they are now, and they catch their reflection in some dim glass. Ford wants to smile but their face drops, eyes horrified.
"What did you do," Stan says, voice a cutting accusation. Nausea erupts in their stomach. And that isn't right. Why isn't it right?
Something is wrong. Everything is so very wrong. Ford's head hurts. Or is it Stans. He doesn't know. They can't tell.
"I fixed it. I fixed us," Ford says and it isn't right either. Why is it still so wrong? Stan is angry. But why is he angry? Why aren't they happy? They're together. After all this time they're finally together again.
Ford can feel Stan pulling away. It's like their mind is splitting in two. Hot searing pain shoots through their head, four eyes closing when the world starts to spin.
Ford grasps ahold of stan and refuses to let go. He can't let Stan ruin this, ruin them. He will not let Stan destroy everything he's worked towards again. They've been apart for so long- too long but not anymore. Besides, this is for them. Stan will just have to understand. They are one now. Broken and wrong but one nonetheless.
"Let me go," They yell, tugging apart furiously. Their shape shifts and distorts but doesn't split. Ford won't let them. They snap back together painfully, stumbling on two bulky legs, one that branches into two feet. Wrong.
"No! This is what we wanted right," their voice bellows, loud and angry and wrong. So very wrong. "For us to be together. Always together."
They grip at their hair as if trying to pull themselves back apart. Stan.
"Not like this. I never asked for this." they shout back, voice sharp and hurt and why aren't they happy now. They should be happy. This is right. This is how they are meant to be.
Even as the anger and hurt courses through their entire being, Ford knows he wouldn't want to be any other way. Stan's angry and scared but at least they're one. They're shattered and hurting but even then some small part burns in them, it's a tiny little ember but it's both of them and it says yes.
Another set of hands reach for the ones in their hair, pulling them out and restraining them. Betrayal spikes, scorching and increasing rapidly even after years of dormancy. Ford.
"Stop being so ungrateful! You're always so-." angry tears spill from their eyes. Decades of hurt and anger and resentment spill forth to mix into a sense numbing cocktail but most of all they feel alone. So very alone. Them.
They grapple and struggle and Ford's device glints from the corner of their eyes. Ford can feel Stan's intent before their body even moves. Being one now, it's like their minds have melded which means Stan knows the device's purpose. And he intends to separate them.
"NO!" Ford bellows, voice priggish and angry, hurt tinting the singular word so strongly that their body stalls. Why would stan- Why doesn't he want them to be together?
"Grunkle Stan?" Their head whips to the left, eyes locking with a confused and tired Mabel’s. Their focus splits, body jerking in an awkward aborted movement as Stan tries to move forward and Ford holds him back.
“Pumpkin grab that- Mabel don't-” And why can they never agree on anything. When did everything go so wrong?
Flashes of being in this very lab, so long ago- but no, it was before that even.
Mabel stares at them, scared and confused and stan has never wanted her to look at him like that ever. But Ford doesn't register it because for a moment, one split second, Stan stops fighting him.
They don't hesitate to rush forward, very much intent on destroying their creation before it has a chance to be used against them. To hurt them.
Two small hands wrap around it before they can get ahold of it. Mabel clutches it to her chest, watching them with something too close to fear. They freeze in place, hands raising in surrender.
"Sweetie," Falls from their lips, pleading. For what though, they aren't quite sure. Because their mind, it should be one yet it isn't. It's at odds, fragmented by a fear and necessity that clash so strongly it could tear universes apart.
“Press the green- Don't you dare-” They speak at once, words and thoughts overlapping. Large hands cover their mouth, two others gripping uselessly at wrist that refuse to budge, because regardless of whatever insanity that has plagued Fords mind to make them act this way, Stan will not let their voice- their words even hint at a threat towards Mabel.
Mabel's head bobs, looking from them down to the thing in her hands, unsure of what to do. Stan nods, eyes pleading.
Ford lashes out, angry and hurt and thrashing like a wild dog. 'Stanley please no. Why don't you want us to be-' Stan is retreating, silent and distant. 'Lee. LEE!'
Everything goes dark.
Ford rises slowly, head spinning and ears ringing. He has the worst headache he has ever experienced. He stares at his hands, splayed on the floor. Two hands, six fingers. Wrong.
His head whips up and his gaze finds Stan's crumpled form across from him on the floor. Stan's glaring at him, thick angry tears spilling down red cheeks.
No. No!
His head turns slowly and his eyes fall on Mabel. Mabel who is standing with his prototype in shaky hands looking between a separated Ford and Stan. He... failed. And now they're...
Apart.
Broken.
Wrong.
#taking the stancest obsession and codependency to a whole new level#does this count as a fic?#i feel like this would be pre-weird#but place it whenever in your mind#i imagine post weird that ford would eventually convince stan to let him try again#stan is hesitant but then he remembers the brief second before things had gone wrong#where being them had felt so right#and he wants that again#so he says yes#stancest#stancest angst?#stancest fusion#might turn this into a proper fic someday... well see#kinda shitty but here me out#is this anything???#this was supposed to be a short humorous “ford wants to be one with his brother so bad that he invents fusions” post#and became so much more#this got so out of hand#im sorry?#TUMBLR HAS POSTED THIS 4? TIMES BEFORE IT WAS READY!!#literally just adding tags every time i edit and add to this and refusing to remove the old ones lol#IT GOT LONGER??????#“i can fix them” no i can make them worse
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they had to time skip in episode six because then we would've seen rebecca and jeff kaplan be better parents than wanda ever was or pretended to be
#for those three years you just know they were the most loving parents a kid who doesn't know himself could have#like he didn't remember anything so for all he knew he was william even if that didn't feel right#and we were shown clear as crystal that rebecca and jeff love their son more than anything#like it broke my heart watching them love each other and them freaking out during the car wreck#???#whereas with wanda it felt more like an excuse to wreck more havoc and also i just think she's a terrible person#she ignored her kids and only used them to fight and as an excuse to kill people. i do not believe they were made with love#they were made because wanda was living a sitcom life and kids are a part of that#anyway we stan rebecca and jeff kaplan#agatha all along#anti wanda maximoff#william kaplan#billy kaplan
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ive been wondering forever about when exactly levi was kidnapped and taken to the heaven lab and this bit from his new unit's board here doesnt help much but i wonder if those are just the first words he remembers learning and not the first words hes learned overall.
mainly this is all just speculation based on 2 things:
1) he ofc had some sort of childhood before the heaven lab from how old he looked at the time, plus his selfie comic art looking younger than his sprite art from ch5 (look at his little horns plus his hair's grown out)
2) he does also just say straight up that he doesn't remember his life from before the lab
i wonder if that means he had to get reacquainted with the kings all over again too. like he wouldnt recognize them at all even with how it looks like they often played together. (tho i do suspect a little that some comics might have been done before there was a more coherent story put together but thats whatever)
#cliffnotes/.txt#whb#what in hell is bad#fun thought: itd be extra hurtful if the reason beel felt closest to levi was bc of them being close as young children#but levi remembers none of that + he doesnt trust anyone now anyways#i wonder if his friendship w/ them is less smthn he wanted after returning and more he Cannot get rid of them and theyre a package deal atp#extra extra thought: if the comics r still canon to the timeline then it looks like levi was always a little introverted#even liking his coffin before everything happened#and it just got worse afterwards bc then it was the only place he felt safe#wait one more#interesting how levi looks like he'd be around maybe 10-12 in the ch5 flashbacks#(tho considering the number they gave him hes probably been in there a long time)#and that age would be pretty close to the mc's age when their parents were killed by im suspecting gabriel or angels under his command#i wonder if they'll talk about that later#how the angels stole both (and more) characters' childhoods
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