#Im happy to talk about it more if it will help too!

[greatmothsukk]

I have not been a very happy girl. The last half yeah has just kept feeling worse and worse. I need it to be better. I need to be happy. For those who wanna hear ill talk some below. Otherwise enjoy this chelsey with her little otter

Last summer was the best part of my life. Constant fishing. Dating a woman I was head over heels for. Fully expecting Trump to lose the election. Every thing was going okay. Then all that went away. Even fishing hasn't picked up much. I've been in such a muck this whole time. Politics went from suspense to dread in a instant and now constant fear and paranoia. I try to escape it I fucking can't. I can't just skedaddle over the boarder to somewhere else and leave. And it isn't clearing up anytime soon. Meanwhile the break up was amicable with no hard feelings but Still hit me so hard after imagining always having her by my side. And recently learned she has a gf now. Im happy for her but after spending months wishing and wishing to finally hear her call me her girlfriend and for that day to never come, it did sting my heart a little hearing her call someone Else that title i coveted so dearly. I know many more wonderful people but she was only the 2nd ive ever found so close to me I could really see her. Also the heartbreak made me shy away from other friends I have a crush on cause those feelings reminded me of her too much and didn't wanna have a negative association with them.

And I've felt like I've done so little and keep watching everyone else's lives move forward. I had been struggling to make art for a while and my attempts to make videos has been stunted cause I hate my voice so bad and voice training keeps failing. And its been hard to decide on stuff to make cause I don't care about what I make art of much. I don't really play video games or watch any shoes and don't wanna. I haven't really wanted to play pokemon in ages. I just like making art of these things but trying to play yugioh is a slog. I wish I had Passion. I wish I had interests that actually drove me and made me excited. And the bigger my platform has become the more isolated ive felt. Even here, once I hit like 1000 followers people started acting weird again like im some upper class whos they're either innoying trying to talk to or Assuming im a snobby cunt. It sucks cause I see smaller artists with lovely little communities I always wished for. But instead i have a web of friends who some of which dislike each other they have one another blocked.

And as for my home life it hasn't been fun. My boyfriend is wonderful but justAs depressed if not worse. Too many arguments. And far too many dead pets. All while the house falls apart more every day and im not allowed to fix it.

My only saving grace recently has been knowing that fishing will pick up soon and that I have been able to keep up with the hoenn dex. It helps me prove that I can accomplish something big. And I can stick to something. Its why im more and more confident that ill be able to keep up with having patreon exclusive pieces when that starts. It makes sure this winter wasn't a total waste. It makes sure I live through it all.

If you read all this thank you. Im sorry if my posts have made you fear at all recently for me. Im trying to stop being a loser. I wanna be good. I wanna be happy.

[sapphicmsmarvel]

Azriel: put that thing back where it came from or so help me!

Smutty. sweet. kinda crack? idk y/n deals with this shit in a joking way bc she might have a breakdown otherwise. 

notes: i’m going to use the modern terms for sex toys. It’s just easier than finding some woohoo fantasy term for it. 

Also, i am not at all experienced in this department so sorry if it aint good. i’m going off gut feelings here folks.  Again, im sorry if this is poorly written smut 😭 however i really like this one!!

kinks: sex toys, masturbation, virginity/slight innocence kink, oral (coochie receiving is what is described) (penis receiving mentioned), fingering, panty-sniffing, probably incorrect knowledge about sex bc i am inexperienced lmfao (I sold dildos for three years tho so that shit i know about) 

------------------------

The talk. 

You were apprehensive about having Azriels dick inside of you. Which he understood. 

He knew you didn’t even like penetration from toys. 

The first time you two had a conversation about sex you made a joke to him that you were “broken” which he did not like. 

“Why would you say that, love?” He asked next to you on your couch. 

“I’m not a fan of things going inside of me. I can give you a mean blowjob though.” You winked. Trying to play off your insecurity. 

He sat up straighter. “Why would I call you broken for that?” 

You shrugged. “Others have. I just get ahead of it now. I’d understand if-“

“No.” He said passionately. “No. This doesn’t change anything.”

You cocked your head, your heart beating too fast in your ears. He continued. “The only people who call you that, are people who have no idea how to pleasure a woman in general. Without their cock or with.” He hissed.  

If anything, he was most excited to eat you out. But if you didn’t want it, you didn’t want it. 

“Even if you didn’t want to kiss me. I wouldn’t leave.” He shook his head, as if the idea of him leaving you was foolish to even think. It was foolish to him anyway. 

“Lucky for you I'm kinda obsessed with kissing you.” You let out a thick laugh, your sinuses already clogged from the idea of crying and holding it in. Your eyes were watery. 

Well, he knew that was true. You sometimes got cuteness aggression with him and would just squish his cheeks and give him kisses repeatedly. And also kissing whatever body part of his you could reach, his back, his thigh, one time it was his pinkie. 

He’s never been loved so openly. 

He scooched closer to you, wanting to hold you. He opened his arms and you crawled in. “Anything you give me, even your time, I am lucky.” He said kissing your forehead as one tear slipped out. “We go at your speed. You want me to eat you out tonight? Done. Suck your tits? Done. Just kiss? Easy. Just hold hands? Perfect.” 

“So if I said I wanted to play with your ass, you’d say yes?” You asked from his chest. 

“…That one you might have to give me time for.” He admitted, sheepishly. You laughed, the sound alone making Azriel smile. 

“We go at your speed, baby. All that matters to me is that I make you happy.”

“The happiest.” You sniffed and burrowed your way into Azriels chest. You didn’t really want him to see you cry but, you trusted him enough to be near you anyway when you cried. 

He kissed the top of your head. In response you kissed his pec through his shirt. 

Anything you wanted you got. 

Master in pussy-eating and fingering. 

After that, you felt more comfortable. You never felt uncomfortable, but you were scared to tell Az about your dislike for penetration. But, he took it easier than any other partner you had. 

Of course he did, the man acted like he was written by a woman. (wink) 

But this meant you had to ask every time you wanted something sexual. You had been having fantasies lately. You wanted him to eat you out. Bad. 

“Hey Azzie.” You said sweetly from the top of your bed, he was at the end of your bed putting his book back in his bag. 

He turned and rolled his eyes, “what?” He asked, smiling. Wondering what food you were about to beg him to make you. 

“I kinda want you to do something for me.” You wiggled your legs. 

He snorted. “No kidding.” 

“I think you’ll like my idea.” 

“If it’s not us canceling dinner with Rhys and Fey tomorrow night to stay in and snuggle then I probably won’t.” He crawled over to you and over you. 

“Mmmm I don’t know about that.” You drawled.

He leaned over you, your noses just barely touching. “What is it, Y/N?” 

You tried not to let the blush on your cheeks deter you from asking, from being bold and asking him for something that he already told you he’d be down for. 

You sighed, slowly hyping yourself up. “I want you to eat me out.” 

A grin slowly spread across his face. “That is what you were delaying asking me?” 

You whined. “It’s hard to ask for things.” 

“Why?“You want me to do it now?” He asked, “I absolutely will do that but I want you sure.” 

You nodded, “but…”

“But…?” He prompted. 

“I didn’t wax.” You played with the sleeves of the shirt you were wearing, which was Azriel’s. 

He let out an uncharacteristic snort. “I don’t care about that. It’s freaky when a pussy is bald.” 

You were no delicate flower, but hearing those words come out of Azriel’s mouth, it was…hot. 

So fucking hot. 

He grinned like he knew where your mind went. “You like dirty talk?” 

“Mhm.” You tried to hide away from his gaze. 

“Oh no.” he fully smiled, cheeky dimples on full display, “I think my sweetheart loves it.” He leaned forward and kissed your cheek. His stubble slightly rubbing against your soft face. 

My sweetheart. 

“Our safe word is ‘red’ okay?” 

You had never even thought about a safe word, but your chest warmed at his awareness. “Okay.” 

He gave you a searing kiss which had you sighing contentedly, 

He pulled away from you and stood up, you made a cry of indignation that quickly turned to a noise of confusion as he grabbed your legs and pulled you to the end of the bed quickly. Your feet were touching the floor, but your back was flat on the bed. 

“Pass me a pillow, love.” 

You handed him a fluffy one and he put it on the floor. Your face burned as he kneeled on the pillow, you wanted to tease him for being an old man, but he caught your teasing eye and went, “I’m about to eat your pussy like a God, I deserve a throne.” 

“So what does that make me?” You whispered. 

“My alter.” His fingers hooked under the waistband of your leggings, pulling them down your soft legs that he wanted wrapped around his hips while his cock bruised your cervix. 

Only when you asked for it rough after he fucked you slowly with his tongue. 

Your leggings got stuck around your ankles, while he focused on taking them off your ankles, but kept your fuzzy socks on because he knew your feet get cold easily (he had them pressed up against his warm legs enough to be scarred from them), he pressed soft kisses into your calf. 

He kissed his way up your thighs, you had lost count of how many times his lips seared your skin, he brushed over your mound. His lips brushing over you, skin tingling and your pussy aching for more. 

You whined as he hooked his fingers underneath your panties and brought them down your legs. As he held the rumpled pair in his hand he was staring at your glistening folds. 

You were about to close your legs, feeling embarrassed, but he took your soaked panties and sniffed them. Hard. 

His eyes rolled back into his head and he shoved them into his pocket. 

“Sorry love, I’ve just been dreaming about this.” 

“Sorry.” You felt a tad guilty you made him wait. You could feel your blush everywhere. You didn’t even know if your legs could blush but they felt like they were. 

In response, he slapped your cunt. You jumped and squeaked. “No apologies.” He scolded. “Or else, I’ll punish you with those slaps.” You bit your lip, “I mean I don’t know if that was supposed to be punishing or not.” You muttered. 

He grinned like the devil, the devil on his knees before his angel. 

The slap had sent a delicious feeling across your entire body. You wanted him to smack your pussy till it was red and throbbing. 

He spread your lips and blew gently on your clit, causing your legs to twitch. He leaned in and did a gentle swipe up your inner labia and ended at your clit. He sucked the nub into his mouth, his lips capturing it. 

You let out a loud moan. “Fuck.” You whimpered, you had never had anybody there. 

“You’re so responsive.” He pulled away and wiped his thumb over your clit. The roughness causing you to jerk. 

“Nobody’s ever been down there.” Your voice was incredibly breathy. 

“Seriously?” 

Your head shot up. “Well usually, when I'd tell someone they couldn’t shove their dick in my vagina, they lost interest.” You snapped. You just wanted his mouth back where it belonged. 

“So mouthy.”

“Yeah, put yours to good use, why don’t you.” You tilted your shin up. 

He slapped your pussy again. You moaned. 

“Such a fucking brat. Can’t wait to see more of that side of you.” 

Then he started french kissing your pussy. 

Sloppy. Fast. Intense. But you never wanted the ecstasy to end. You threw your head back, lost in the sensation and let out a loud guttural moan. Your sound caused him to give a hum of approval which spurred your orgasm quicker than you expected. 

“Oh God, I'm there.” Was the only warning he had as your muscle gushed and spasmed around his tongue. 

After he efficiently cleaned your orgasm up, he groaned in ecstasy. “You taste so fucking good. Better than my dreams.”

You caught your breath, your belly moving up and down as your muscles stopped constricting. 

“Can you…” You panted. 

“Can I do what, princess?” He mumbled as he kissed your mound, which made your body twitch because of the oversensitivity. No part of your skin went untouched. 

“Can you fuck me with your fingers please?” 

His head shot up, “are you sure?” He dragged his fingers between your folds. You twitched again at the oversensitivity. “You’re pretty sensitive.” 

“It feels good.” You whined. You’d be embarrassed about it later even though Azriels cock hardens even more at each sound. 

He massaged your folds, “You tell me when to stop.” You nodded. “Please Az.” 

He ever so gently prodded your puffy hole, then gently, as gently as possible, he inserted a finger. 

The stretch of his finger was a delicious type of pain. You compared it to piercings. It excites you. Then you felt relief that you liked his finger. 

Maybe you’d like his dick. But go slowly, he always encouraged that because if you jumped in and didn’t like something, that brought fear back. 

He fingered you slowly, allowing you to control the speed with the way you grinded into his hand. Your moans loud. Your cunt squeezing his fingers in a way that had him wanting to stuff his cock into your cunt, but he wasn’t going to until you were positive that was what you wanted. 

He was enamored by the way your cunt sucked his fingers in greedily. 

You felt a foreign feeling in your belly. Like an orgasm just more intense. This orgasm came without warning and you didn’t want it to end. 

“You can have orgasms back to back.” Was the sentence that knocked you out of your stupor. 

“What.” Your brain was fuzzy. But delightfully warm, fuzzy and cozy. 

“You, my love, are able to have multiple orgasms in a short amount of time.” 

“Good to know.” Was all you said as you fully allowed your body to melt into the mattress. 

Fuck me. 

Since then, you had been asking Azriel to eat you out constantly. Almost every day. You gave him that mind-blowing head you told him about. 

You two have found that toys are a good stimulus for non-penetrative sex. You jerked him off with a pocket pussy from behind him. Dirty talking in his ear. 

However now, you wanted him to fuck you so hard. 

Six months since you two talked about your comfort levels and you were starting to go a little crazy. You hear so many stories about girls being fucked so hard and so good, you’ve been dying for it even. 

“Baby I want your dick inside me.” You said from the bedroom. 

“Question, do you get off on asking me this shit out of the blue?” He walked out from the hallway. 

You shrugged, “you made this a safe space, it’s your fault.” 

He snorted. “Are you being serious?” 

You nodded, “I wouldn't joke about this.” 

He smiled softly, he walked up to you and put his hands on your hips. “Are you sure?”

“Yes.” You exclaimed with no hesitation. 

“Baby, I really want you to think-“

“Oh my Gods yes! I want your massive dick inside me!” You pouted. 

His lips twitched at your phrasing. He loved you so dearly. “Okay.” He reassured. 

He smiled sweetly, “Now?” He didn’t want to admit how eager he was. 

You looked surprised. “Now?” 

He shrugged, “if you want. Or we can wait until later. Give me like an hour to get food and flowers?”

You waved him off, “I don’t need all that. I just…”

“What, baby?” He stroked your hip. “Nothin I haven’t seen before.” 

“I haven't waxed.” You murmured. 

“What did I tell you before?” He smiled, reassuringly. 

“That you didn’t care.” You mumbled. “And I stand by it.” 

“I trimmed at least.” You let out an insecure chuckle. 

“I wouldn’t care if you didn’t.” He pulled you into him, his hands sneaking down to your ass and squeezing you to him. He kissed your neck, causing you to gasp. He pushed you against the edge of your bed, pushing you down into the fluffy comforter and crawling over you. He kissed down the cleavage of your tank top. 

He tugged at the bottom of it, “can I take this off?” 

“Please.” You whined. You lifted your back and arms and he shucked the shirt and bra off. 

He palmed your breasts, his skin rough against your soft peaks. He tweaked your nipples between his fingers and you whined again as sparks shot straight to your clit. 

He sucked a nipple into his mouth, your back shot off the bed, “and why haven’t we done that before?” You groaned. 

He popped your tit out of his mouth. “Oh you have no idea about the things we haven’t done yet. And what pleasure I can bring you.” 

Your skin tingled at the promise and arousing threat in his voice.  

As he continued to make love to your tits, he was taking off your pajama pants and underwear. His fingers swiped through your folds, spreading your slickness across your skin and slowly massaging you to warm you up. 

“Please, I need you.” You begged. 

“Baby, I haven’t prepped you.” He came off your chest and began kissing down your stomach.

“I don’t care.” You whined some more. “I just want you inside me please.” 

He took his gray sweats off, causing you to see the beast in his pants bob around. 

You swallowed at the sheer size of him. Obviously, you knew what his dick looked like as you’ve sucked his soul out before. However, right now you were thinking about how that massive thing is going to fit inside you. 

You allowed a moment of mourning for your cunt. 

Oh girl, I’m praying for you. 

You were eager for him to fuck you but also kind of nervous. He saw the look of anxiety on your face, “hey, we stop whenever you want. We can stop right now.” 

You swallowed. “Okay.” 

“What’s the safe word baby?” 

“Red.” You said. 

“Good girl.” He rasped. 

Your mouth was watering, you didn’t know your mouth could water over a penis but goddamn Azriel was made from gods personal clay, into the perfect man in front of you. 

He lifted your legs gently, resting his knees against the end of your bed so he can thoroughly fuck you to your hearts content. 

He gently entered you, “breathe baby.” He coaxed the breaths out of you by putting his hand on your tummy, then putting yours on his to match to his breathing. 

Tears pricked your eyes as he slowly entered into your beautiful cunt. It stung, of course it did. But Gods, it was a good pain. A satisfying stretch that stung slightly. But quickly morphed into pleasure worthy of sonnets. 

“You okay?” 

You nodded as a tear went down your flushed cheeks. “It feels so good.” 

“Gods.” He croaked. “Your pussy was made for me. Fucking sculpted by the Gods, just f’me.” 

“Deeper please.” You whispered oh so sweetly. 

He croaked out a laugh. “You’re so polite. So sweet. My good girl.” He kissed your tears on your cheeks as he swiftly moved his hips, urging his cock deeper inside you, hitting spots you weren’t even aware existed. 

You moaned, not even caring about your volume. All of your senses were in overdrive. The sweat pressed between your bodies, the swell of his pecs against your tits. His pelvis sitting so snuggly, so perfectly, against your cunt.

He felt a new addiction churning inside him. The addiction to your nails scraping down his back, the addiction of his hips snapping into yours and the warmth of your walls. 

“I’m not gonna last.” You cried. His mushroom tip thrusting into your spongy g-spot. 

“Me neither baby.” He couldn’t wait to paint your walls white, he knew you were on birth control, just as he was. 

Just as your muscles contracted and spasmed around his cock, his come painted your walls white. He practically collapsed ontop of you, only his forearms keeping him from fully laying on you. 

You shook your head, “nuh uh.” 

“Wait what? Are you okay?” He sat up surprised, ready to gently pull out but didn’t want to risk hurting you. 

“I’m fine, but stop using your full strength and lay on me.” You grumbled. Sleepiness taking over. 

“Baby you have to go to the bathroom.” He suppressed a laugh, knowing it would just make you grumpier. 

“Five minutes?” You begged. 

And how could he say no to that? 

Hint: he could and would never say no to you. 

[moonysunrulytoast]

situations that have happened in my friend group that are marauders coded part 2 (wolfstar edition):

(it’s new years day. remus got too pissed and threw up early in the night at a bar. sirius, also pissed but not to the point of vomiting, offers to accompany him home in an uber. on the way back to james’s apartment, remus is trying very hard not to throw up. he does. out the window though! no harm no foul. sirius helps remus walk to the apartment, as much as he can in his own state, and unlocks the door. at this point remus is back to talking. in fact, he’s talking a lot more than usual. the two of them move to the bathroom so remus can brush his teeth. when he’s done, sirius grabs him a glass of water, setting it down on the coffee table. the two of them immediately collapse onto the couch. remus ends up half in sirius’s lap but neither of them move. they stay there, even with the couch being abnormally large, and them not knowing each other very well this being their 3rd hangout. and their first time alone together. remus was regulus’s friend, they met at reg’s birthday party two months prior.)

*Sirius absentmindedly wraps his arms around remus’s waist and just… holds him. remus leans into it and makes a very light contented sound*

sirius: (a little slurred) sooo how’re you feeling?

*remus suddenly sits up, turns, and looks sirius directly in the eyes before speaking very quickly and earnestly*

remus: honestly??? better. loads better. eons better which is horrible because now i feel really guilty and embarrassed and ugh *remus turns around and lays back with his eyes closed, making a sound of frustration* i fucked up your new years. and that’s horrible like we just met and you lent me your books from your room on your birthday even though i barely knew you and now we’re here and now this is how you see me and-

sirius: oh love, stop. you’re freaking out.

*sirius absentmindedly rubs his hands up and down remus’s arms. once his breathing slows down, sirius starts drawing soothing circles on his skin*

sirius: first of all, my new years is far from fucked up. i spent the day day drinking with some of my best friends and my brother (one of my all time favorite activities) and now im here with you. you. you. you. who i enjoy being around. and!! i get to listen to you talk. which is a privilege by the way. i love conversations with you. and even if i didn’t (which again i very much do) it’s also very difficult for me to have a bad night. i love hanging out with myself - so the other person’s gotta be pretty bad for the vibe to be ruined.

remus: but i-

sirius: second of all, we’ve all been too drunk before and each have our own fair share of embarrassing stories. the last thing this group of people is going to do is judge you for a bad night. they happen to everyone.

remus: …really?

sirius: yes really! you absolute dork. you should hear some of the stuff IVE done. you’re a human being and you making ONE mistake doesn’t make you deplorable.

(remus nods slowly before zoning out for a few moments, deep in thought. sirius waits patiently.)

remus: you know, i’m really glad it was you who brought me home. i feel… safe with you. safer than i’ve felt before when something like this happens

sirius: that’s horrible. that you’ve felt unsafe. i’m happy i don’t make you feel that way.

remus: me too.

sirius: …you know, it’s funny, this is the longest we’ve ever talked one on one

remus: oh my god you’re right

(they both burst into laughter. after a few moments it dies down and the two of them are looking at each other. staring into each others eyes, both smiling. remus cocks his head very lightly to the side before going to speak again)

remus: (a little dreamy) you’re… you’re so…. you remind me of a book character. someone people write stories about.

*sirilus swallows harshly, his cheeks burning*

sirius: oh! well. thank you remus. that’s probably one of the kindest thing anyone’s ever said to me

remus: it’s true!! i would know. books are my favorite. and listening to you is like- it’s comforting and warm. just hearing you talk - did you know that? it’s like i always really want to know what comes next. i could never get tired of it.

sirius: i- um *sirius’s face is hot now and his heart is beating really fast. remus just smiles and pokes his nose* you’re like the moon

remus: what?

sirius: you’re so beautiful and bright. you have this kind, wise energy and you’re quiet but your presence isn’t. people see you, they notice you, and you change them. and you’re witty and funny and a little dark sometimes too. you’re like the moon remus. you’re like the moon.

remus: oh.

(just then james unlocks his front door and their friends pile through the entrance.)

james: SIRIUS

sirius: JAMES

(sirius scrambles up and they embrace each other fiercely)

james: oh how i’ve missed you

reg: it has been two and a half hours tops since you’ve seen each other

sirius: two and a half hours TOO LONG

remus: yeah

james: (quietly, to sirius) had you two…been there the whole time?

sirius: yes

james: okay… and he’s okay?

sirius: yeah :) he’s okay

james: oh good. that’s so so good. (he claps him on the shoulder and his eyes soften) and you? are you okay?

sirius: (looking over at remus and back at james) never better prongs

[bvidzsoo]

Took me some time to answer this, but I hope you know I'm kicking my feet, hehe. Love u, Mina! <3

I certainly wasn't expecting Wikipedia to be involved, but nonetheless, amazing.

lmaoo, let me have my moment of weakness...at least it wasn't CHATGPT ikyk;)

The "you can't see color until you meet your soulmate" has since like middle school been one of my favourite plots ever, so to read yeosang fanfic created by none other than ari had me kicking my feet in the air. I was so excited to read this when we first started planning the event and im still vibrating with excitement 🤭

maaan, stop, why haven't you told me when we were planning the event, WOMAN??? This is so sweet tho, thank you very much! You're jinja the sweetest, ack!

I really like this MC. She can both feel envy for those who have found their soulmate but also be happy for them. and, oh my god, how she wonders if the warmth of seeing her customers happy is the same as the one she'll get seeing her soulmate 😭

she wants to hate them couples, but deep down, she can't because she's just a hopeless romantic lol (like me?? idk)

The further into the fic I get, the more I fall in love with your writing again Ari. There's something so special about how you describe the MC finally being able to see the colors. Like it doesn't hit her all at once, but gradually, as if she's always known that blue is the shade of the sky and green is the rich color of grass outside. And it's amazing how everything clicks in place when she sees Yeosang's reaction. I also love that she takes the time to drink in everything after Yeosang leaves. She admires the flowers in their true form for the first time ever and I think that's really sweet 🥹

ahh, I had this scene envisioned even before writing it...like, i got this idea when we were randomly searching for the tropes and I was like OMG i want this trop because i could do this really cool scene with it-and to know it came off well...THANK UUU

She doesn't get it by looking at the different ribbons or flowers, when a wave of rainbow washes over her, no. She realises that she has met her soulmate by seeing him. And, in some way, I find that to be more romantic than if she'd put two and two together by seeing the true color of the ribbon for the first time.

it iiis so much mooore romantic, AAACK!!

I freaking love their date 😭😭 They are so cute and soft with each other, and just taking it slow until they gradually warm up and are more relaxed. AND MC GIVING HIM A FREAKING HUG, THAT WAS SO CUTE- UGh....🤧 I love how they are always somehow touching whether its hugging, holding hands or literally knees nudging together 🥹 They've been apart for too long that they can't help it oh my heart~~

im glad you liked their cute little dates because i was kicking my feet HARD lol. And yes, they've been apart for too long now and don't want to miss any more seconds. I'm glad they are endearing hehe

THIS IS WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT EARLIER!!! They're just so comfortable with each other now, as if they've known each other for years 😭 A thing that's sorta important to me is the idea that you can sit in a silence with someone and not feel awkward about it. Like you can just bask in each other's presence and think, "this is nice" despite not exchanging words.

if the love that finds me isn't gentle, I DON'T WANT IT OKAY?? I love moments like this one so much UGH, i was unwell writing it LOL. I knew you'd be a sucker for them as well, hehe ^^

IM JUMPING IN A DITCH THEY ARE SO CUTE 😭😭😭😭 PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASEEEEEE, MAY A LOVE LIKE THIS ATTACK ME. LITERALLY TAKE ME BY THE NECK AND BODY SLAM ME 🤧

lmaoo, you always make me crack up when you say this...im pinning it, btw!

Ahem, anyways! This story is so sweet and cute and soft and- *inhales* I'm now in need of more Yeosang fanfics 😭 As I always say, you never cease to amaze me Ari and this fic, at least I feel like, made you explore the more softer side of your creativity. Considering we've read a plethora of different genres, but now we get to see more of your fluffy-side and I can say I'm in love with it. Matter of fact, I might even send you a request of more fluffy!Yeosang 👀🩷

AAA now stop it Mina, that infinitely too sweet, I cannot do this. You saying I'm exploring my softer side of creativity has my heart soaring through my chest for some reason, thank uuu so much. I've been really enjoying writing these stories, thank you for taking part in it and giving me a chance to do something fun on this site hehe. That being said, I'll be catching up with your Hwa story!

A world in your colours

𐀔 Cherry Blossom, March Event 𐀔

Author: bvidzsoo

Pairing: Daycare teacher!Kang Yeosang x Florist!reader

𐀔 Warning: none 𐀔 Word count: 6.2k 𐀔 Rating: sfw 𐀔 Genre: fluff, soulmates: you see all the colours for the first time when you meet your soulmate, strangers to lovers, fated together 𐀔 Summary: A world through the faint hues of your soulmate's eye colour isn't the most colourful life to live. Approaching twenty-five and still being unable to see all the colours the world has to offer has you worried that you'll never meet your soulmate. Doubts and questions riddle your mind day and night, but at least you have the one thing that makes you happy no matter what, your little flowers. You can't actually see their colours, but you can imagine their vibrancy. And then, one day when you're making a bouquet for a lovely man, your whole world gets covered in an overwhelming amount of colour, rendering you stunned.

A/N: Here it is, our lovely Yeosang's drabble. I love this guy and I love this little fluffy story, man, I was smiling so widely while writing these two, they are so endearing. Despite writing a florist!au...I cannot take care of my plants for the life of me, even though I really love them...especially pretty little flowers, but oh, well, I'll have to get better at taking care of them once I move out...I hope you enjoy this drabble and let me know what you thought of it, your feedback is much appreciated! Enjoy! ^^ divider @cromernet

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            Colour, as defined by everyone’s best friend, Wikipedia, is the visual perception based on the electromagnetic spectrum. Although colour is not a fundamental attribute of matter itself, the way we perceive it is intricately tied to how an object absorbs, reflects, and emits light, as well as the subtle play of interference within those light waves. That was another sentence you had long ago read on the internet, and it stuck with you. Your peers have always considered you a bit strange for your obsession with colours, but then again, in a world that was painted mostly grey with hues of brown, amber, and copper, you couldn’t help but obsess over it. It wasn’t by choice that you couldn’t see all colours…if it were up to you, you’d coat your whole life in nothing but a mess of bright and light pastels. You sighed at the reoccurring thought as you walked over to another plastic vase to grab a purple Lily to add to the bouquet. You double-checked the label before grabbing it, though; you didn’t need another embarrassing incident today.

The sole reason as to why you couldn’t see colours yet was because you hadn’t met your soulmate yet. In a way, it was something you were glad for because you’d know for sure who your soulmate was. You’ve read stories written by famous novelists who fantasized about a world where your soulmate's first words directed at you would be inked into your skin, and you wondered whether that felt as magical as the author made it seem. What if five different people said the same exact words to you that were on your wrist? What then? How would you decide which was your soulmate? You didn’t like thinking about that, though, content with the reality of your world. Sure, it was a bit depressing and quite literally grey, but it also brought a sense of excitement and anticipation with it. Whenever you allowed yourself to fantasize about the moment when you’d meet your soulmate, your cheeks would burn hot, and your heart would race. You’d close your eyes and try to imagine all the vibrant colours that suddenly coloured your surroundings.

You figured it would feel overwhelming at first, making you sentimental or sending you into a panicked sobbing. You thought it would blind you and make you feel nauseous as all the colours would be suddenly as vivid as an explosion in the distance that was now right under your nose. You thought you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself anymore, that you’d need a second to piece your thoughts back together, to make sense of the situation, to tell yourself that everything was okay. That’s how you imagined you’d react, but you were always a person full of surprises, even to yourself. Besides, diving too deep into this topic always leaves you with a sour aftertaste. You were twenty-five, and your world was still gloomy, devoid of the warmth and brightness everyone around you gushed about. It wasn’t unusual to be still single by twenty-five, but most people have found their soulmates back in high school. Your parents, for example, were even luckier than that and met in middle school; their worlds suddenly filled with all colours. You were jealous of them, but you also admired them profoundly.

Their love was deep and unlike anything you’d seen before. Their respect for each other went even deeper than their love, kindness and devotion, just a few sentiments that could be added to their plate when cherishing one another. You wished for a gentle love like theirs, for quiet moments where no words had to be uttered to be understood, for genuine kindness and laughter that filled the longing in your chest. You smiled at your customer as you tied her bouquet together, getting an excited grin back in return.

“Oh, this is gorgeous!” She exclaimed as you grabbed a little butterfly sticker, searching for the perfect leaf to press onto, “My little one will love this!”

You were happy that the mother was excited; seeing your clients excited and happy over the flowers you loved so much always filled your chest with warmth. You imagined being with your soulmate felt like that, too. You handed the bouquet over to the woman once you were done with it, accepting her card when she said she had no cash.

“I’ve never seen anyone combine these colours so beautifully before,” The woman mused to herself as her eyes took in the plethora of flowers, a mixture of white, yellow, pink and even a little bit of purple in there, “You’ve got an artistic eye for it.”

You felt proud at the praise as you handed the card back, grinning at the lady as you bowed your head in gratitude, “That’s a lovely compliment, thank you so much!”

You didn’t have the heart to tell the lady that you had no idea what the flowers looked like in colour, whether the pink bow you’d tied to keep the bouquet together matched with the flowers you had chosen. The lady left soon after as she was in a rush, and you sighed, looking around the flower shop. You could tell the walls were a lighter orange, the shades a dark brown and probably your soulmate’s exact eye colour since the colour was so rich in hue. You’ve always wondered if the other colours were just as beautiful as the ones you could lightly see from time to time—or more pronounced if they were the same colour as your soulmate’s eyes—and your conclusion had always been that, yes, no matter what nuance or hue, all of it was just as gorgeous.

You thought of colours as you thought of flowers, special and unique in their ways, distinguishable and rather easy to remember once you learned their properties. Flowers have been your escape since a young age when your preschool teacher tasked you with growing little beans, encouraging you to name them and speak to them daily. After that, you had asked your parents whether you could try and cultivate your little garden in your room, and once they’ve given you the go, you had never turned back. The flower shop that you were working at wasn’t yours just yet, but its owner—a lovely middle-aged woman—was considering passing it on to you once she had grown old and tired of her business. You’d gladly take over it as you had no big plans for your future. You were content living in the place you had been born, surrounded by friends and family. You realised you were luckier than most that you could live a comfortable and fulfilled life, and that’s why you always made sure to give back to your community, even if it was something little.

You were just about to walk over to the vase with sunflowers when the doorbell chimed, signalling a new customer. You plastered a small smile to your lips and straightened your back, welcoming the man who had decided to walk inside your store, “Hello, how may I help you?”

“Hi, uhm, it’s my mother’s birthday today.” The man spoke, surprising you with his deep voice. His features were soft and relaxed; it was an unexpected juxtaposition, “Her favourite flowers are Magnolias; do you have any of that?”

You nodded your head, walking over to the vase placed right by the entrance. They were fresh as they had come in just today, so they were gorgeous as they were in bloom, “Silk Magnolias are mostly used for bridal bouquets, but I can make you a simpler one if you want me to.”

“I’d love that, please.” The man said as you two looked at each other, and for some unexplainable reason, your heart skipped a beat. You averted your eyes shily and crouched down to grab three Magnolias, your long skirt brushing past your ankles.

“They go well with Gardenias; would you like me to add some of those too?” You stood back up, realising that since the bouquet would be all white, you could add a deep red coloured ribbon to it, or perhaps even a soft pink one. The challenge, however, would be to find the right nuances since your coworker messed up some of the colours after her shift. You’d be embarrassed to ask the man for a little guidance, and that would be also you assuming that he had found his soulmate already, which would be a bit rude as you didn’t want to make him feel uncomfortable. Due to you being unable to see all colours, everything inside the store was labelled with little post-it notes, bold letters stating the colour of the flowers. With that also came the shelf behind the front counter always being organised after a system that you had already memorised, no need to read the labels anymore. All ribbons and coloured foils were placed in their designated spot so that you’d know which one was which colour, but your coworker had mixed up the black and blue ones, resulting in you embarrassing yourself not even half an hour ago when a customer asked for blue ribbons and you had given them black ones. You quickly fixed your mistake, and the man wasn’t even upset, but your cheeks still burned with shame as now the man knew you still hadn’t met your destined partner.

“Uh, if you think it’ll be pretty, sure.” The man said, walking to the counter as you went behind it to organise the bouquet for him, “May I ask…what colour it’ll be?”

You froze for a second before you hummed, going over to the Gardenias to grab two of them, “White, if that’s alright.”

The man nodded eagerly, letting his green briefcase rest on the counter where it didn’t invade your space, “That’ll be perfect, my mother loves the colour white.”

You smiled as you glanced up at the man, and somehow it seemed as if the sunrays shining through the window were brighter, creating a white haze around him. He looked really pretty with his curly hair falling over his forehead, curling around his cheekbones, and you noted its copper hue with slight admiration. Afraid you were starting to stare, you lowered your eyes and started working on the man’s bouquet. You first made sure all the flowers were fresh and in perfect shape, undamaged by transport, and then cut into the ends a bit. Then you held the Magnolias together, arranging the Gardenias in between and adding a few dark green weeds for a better aesthetic. The handle of the tape was almost black, and you found yourself humming a melody as you taped the flowers together just until you’d tied the ribbon around it. You pulled the bouquet away from your face and felt the customer’s eyes on your face, almost insistent, but you kept working with a small smile on your face, catching a glance at your bright orange nails. You remembered your mother saying that colour might be a bit too bright, but since you couldn’t see it well as it was dulled to your eyes, you decided to still go for it. It was fun, after all.

You turned then and looked at the shelf behind you, tilting your head in wonder. There was the blue ribbon that had embarrassed you earlier, small white dots decorating the fabric, and you found it cute how the pastel colours blended nicely together. You glossed over the black and blue ribbons, they wouldn’t make the white pop right now. You needed something intense and eye-catching—like the burgundy fabric that would look gorgeous in contrast with the white flowers! You grinned triumphantly and grabbed it off the shelf, turning around to tie it tightly around the bouquet, making sure the flowers didn’t move while you worked on making the perfect bow, not too small nor too big. Your chest felt warm, and you were aware of your cheeks burning, but you couldn’t decide whether it had gotten warmer inside the shop or if it was the man’s eyes following your every move that made you feel shy. Nonetheless, you smiled brightly as you raised the bouquet and extended it towards the man. His eyes were slightly wide as they frantically searched your face, and you felt a little disheartened as you couldn’t decipher what his reaction meant. Was your bouquet really that gorgeous, or did he perhaps not like it and wasn’t sure how to voice his thoughts?

“Oh,” You muttered, eyebrows slightly raised as you glanced at the man’s burgundy red hair and then at the ribbon, “The ribbon matches your hair! What a coincidence…”

Your smile froze on your face, your heart stilling in your chest. The ribbon matches your hair, kept repeating in your head like a distant echo as your fingers slightly trembled, your eyes running all over the man in a panic. He was taller than you, a bit buff underneath his dark green suit, tailored to fit his body prettily. His necktie was a light orange, a lighter shade that still matched his beautifully dyed hair, his lips a cherry red much like the small heart-shaped discolouration on his left temple. Your breath stuttered in your chest as your hands fell to the counter, mindful of the bouquet in your hands still.

“You’re…”

“I am.” The man sounded just as winded as you did, a huff of disbelief leaving his mouth, “Your socks are so bright, they match your nail colour.”

Your bottom lip trembled as you laughed, looking down at your socks that peeked out from underneath your skirt. They were bright, really bright actually, a neon colour worse than your nails. You had no idea you even owned them, and you wondered why your mother had never said anything about them.

“The bouquet will be 15€.” You said as you typed the amount into the cash register, and the man nodded, opening his dark green briefcase.

“Right, thank you so much.” The man said, fumbling with his wallet as he opened it, pressing the crumpled-up money on the counter. He reached out for the bouquet but hesitated slightly, and you averted your eyes as your fingers brushed together. You had a feeling it wasn’t by accident, given that the man’s cheeks also flushed pink, eyes abashed, “My mother will love it.”

“Happy birthday to your mother.” You found yourself saying as the man pressed his wallet into the small pocket of his suit jacket, briefcase in his firm grip. You didn’t want him to leave, not yet, but you couldn’t keep him here all day…it was his mother’s birthday, after all.

“I’ll come by tomorrow, same time as today. When does your shift end?” Your heart skipped a beat as the man stumbled into the open front door as he was walking backwards, his eyes not leaving you for one second. You chuckled and bit your bottom lip, playing with the money in your hands.

“I have the morning shift; I’ll be ready to go by the time you make it here.” The man’s lips pulled into a wide smile, lighting his whole face up. He looked gorgeous, and you felt breathless as you watched him wave at you and almost get stuck on the door handle, his cheeks flushing pink again as he finally left the store with haste. He glanced back inside through the huge window, and you told yourself to hold it together until you couldn’t see him anymore, and then came the squeals you could barely contain in front of him, your heart racing a mile. You had to take a seat and press your forehead against the cool counter, and even that didn’t help the warmth from spreading throughout your body as if winter was finally over and the first spring sun was here to warm you up from the inside out. That man was your soulmate. Your fingers trembled as you raised your head, blinking hard.

The world was so…different. Everything had colour, absolutely everything, and you didn’t know how to react to it all. The counter, which you thought was a light green or blue, was actually a cute beige colour, the stickers stuck to it a whirlwind of bright colours. You traced them before looking back up, eyes taking in all the beautiful flowers. You couldn’t believe that you could see the yellowness of the Sunflowers, a little taken back that they looked mustard coloured…or was that right? You hadn’t seen mustard yet, so you couldn’t tell; you’d have to test your theory out once you got home. The Lilies, the purple ones, left you in awe of their beauty, and you couldn’t help but walk over to the blue Orchids and trace their petals with a fond smile. You wondered who the man was as you looked out the window dreamily, your heart racing in your chest uncontrollably. He was a gorgeous person, and he also seemed kind; you couldn’t wish for tomorrow to come faster. You giggled to yourself and hurried back behind the counter, hands shaking as you dialled your boss in your excitement, too eager to tell her that you could see all the colour around you now.

            Your hands trembled as you clocked out, locking eyes with your grinning co-worker. She was a bouncing ball of nerves, even more excited than you over the fact that your soulmate was supposed to show up any time now. You chewed on your bottom lip and smoothed down your kaki long skirt, your black blouse thin so you had to cover up due to the morning chill. Your warm and long coat was a bright orange, and on your way home yesterday, you had realised that orange was slowly becoming your favourite colour. Judging based on your wardrobe, littered in colours you had no idea even existed, you had concluded that even unknowingly, your world had always been infused with colours. Your mother cried, and your father jumped around in happiness when you told them about this new development, right while having dinner, accidentally slipping up by saying sunflowers were definitely not mustard coloured. You had wanted to tell them in a cosier setting, perhaps in a cuter way too, but what was done was done. Your mother then made you call your grandmother, who was groggy since she was getting ready for bed, but the soft smile on her lips told you that she was just as happy for you as your parents, co-worker, and boss.

“What was your first impression of him?” Your co-worker smiled brightly at you, fiddling with a ribbon she had difficulty tying around the thick bouquet.

“He’s just…he seems very sweet and caring.” You heard yourself saying, chewing on your bottom lip as your eyes were glued to the huge window. He was supposed to be here a few minutes ago, but then again, he hadn’t specified an exact time when he’d stop by, “His features are really delicate, but he looks manly still. I love his hair, though; it’s so rich in colour.”

“What colour is it?” Your co-worker followed up with her question quickly, too invested to pay any attention to the bouquet she was supposed to finish in five minutes.

“Burgundy, and he has a matching—” You gasped, eyes widening as the man was here. He wore a tailored suit again, a beaver brown—you’d stayed up until a very late hour last night, researching colours and hues, shades and tones, trying to memorise them all in your rush of excitement—and his tie was a darker orange. Your heart was racing furiously as it felt impossible to look away; your eyes met when the man arrived by the door. His eyes were wide, and his cheeks slightly flushed a light pink colour, and you took a deep breath before you turned to wave at your co-worker. She looked stunned, eyes frozen on the man before her grin spread wider, ushering you out the shop with a squeal. It was embarrassing, but you were more preoccupied with walking straight without having your knees give out as you watched the man open the door for you.

“Thank you.” You lowered your eyes as he hummed, stepping aside to make space for you, “Hi…uhm, it’s lovely seeing you again?”

You wanted to facepalm yourself for making it sound like a question, but the man didn’t seem bothered as he chuckled, ducking his head. His suit jacket was nicely folded over his arm, his white shirt clinging to his body. It had gotten significantly warmer by noon, but you were someone who easily got cold, so you didn’t take your coat off.

“Hi, it’s really nice seeing you, yeah.” Then, the man cleared his throat and looked up with more confidence on his face, “I didn’t introduce myself yesterday. I was honestly too stunned to function properly. My name is Kang Yeosang.”

You extended your hand to shake Yeosang’s hand, your soulmate, and blushed when your skin made contact with his. His palm was bigger than yours, and his skin was really soft, but his grip was confident and strong without hurting you. You told him your name, and his eyes sparkled under the bright sunlight, and you felt yourself unable to look away. Yeosang was gorgeous; seldom did you see a man like him. It felt slightly surreal that he was your soulmate, and you felt extremely lucky all of a sudden. You didn’t know him yet, but something told you he was an amazing person.

“Where would you like us to go?” Yeosang’s question reminded you of the fact that you were still standing outside the flower shop, quite blocking the entrance actually, and you flushed darker when you realised your co-worker was most likely watching the two of you.

“Maybe for a stroll in the park just there?” You pointed across the street, the gates of the lovely park in the heart of the city visible. Yeosang nodded enthusiastically and motioned in front of himself as a way to tell you to lead the way. As you took off, you found yourself walking as close by Yeosang’s side as you could without making it weird, and your heart hadn’t stopped racing ever since you saw him. There was something magnetic about the man, about your soulmate, and you felt like you couldn’t last another day without being in his presence. Matter of fact, you didn’t want to be since you’ve waited twenty-five years for this moment.

“Would you like some coffee? Or tea?” Yeosang asked as you two noticed the small coffee stand at the same time and you hummed, looking at Yeosang a little sheepishly.

“I don’t like coffee, but I really like tea.” Yeosang chuckled, something like endearment appearing on his face as he grabbed your elbow gently and veered you away from the oncoming crowd of teenagers.

“That’s funny. I don’t like tea but basically live off of coffee.” You chuckled too, your eyes meeting as Yeosang walked you two over to the coffee stand. There weren’t a lot of tea options, so you settled for wild berries, glad that the vendor had some homemade honey for you to mix with your tea instead of sugar. Yeosang asked for a simple black coffee with ice, a bit of milk and one spoonful of sugar, and you found yourself reciting his order in your mind until you could recall it easily.

With your drinks in your hands, you headed for the crosswalk, having to wait since it was red for the pedestrians. The street was bustling with many people at this hour, and not everyone was as self-aware as you—and it seemed like Yeosang, too—so they either didn’t look where they walked or purposefully pushed people around to get further to the front. You had to make space for a guy on his phone, not paying even a little bit of attention to those around himself as you, too, could hear the music coming from his headphones. You tried to make space for everyone, but before you could step behind Yeosang, you felt fingers sneaking between yours, a warm palm pressed against yours as you were gently guided into Yeosang’s side. His eyes were still sparkling, his cheeks were red—not as red as the discolouration on his temple—and you thought for a second you could hear his rapidly beating heart.

“Is this okay?” He asked almost too quietly for you to hear with the honking cars and loudly conversing people, but you did catch it, and you nodded eagerly, making sure to squeeze Yeosang’s hand for extra confirmation.

“Yes! More than okay, actually.” You sounded more confident than you felt, and Yeosang was suddenly smiling widely, his cheeks pulled up and making him look the softest. Before you could do something as crazy as lean up and nuzzle your nose against his, the light turned green, and you followed the crowd, crossing the street. The walk to the park’s entrance was quiet, your hands fitting perfectly into each other’s, and you revelled in the comfort of it all as Yeosang occasionally glanced at you. The park wasn’t as packed as the sidewalks, and you could freely roam around without bumping into anyone, and yet, your hands stayed intertwined.

“So,” You spoke up, taking a sip of your tea before you faced Yeosang while walking, “What do you do for work? I’m a florist, but you know that much about me already.”

Yeosang hummed, facing you with that adorable small smile on his lips, “I’m a daycare teacher. The school isn’t far from here. You actually saved me yesterday. I was running late for my mother’s birthday dinner, and I thought there weren’t any flower shops close by.”

You chuckled, veering Yeosang away from the flock of birds that didn’t look too friendly, “Did your mother like the bouquet?”

“Yes, she loved it, thank you.” Yeosang then stopped, tilting his head with furrowed eyebrows, “I told them…my parents…that I found my soulmate, and they, well, uhm, they want to meet you. I know it’s too soon, and I asked them to wait a little bit until we’ve gotten to know each other, but they are just too impatient and excited to finally meet you.”

You felt your heart swell and almost burst out of your chest as your smile grew into a wide grin. You didn’t even realise it, but you had taken a step closer to Yeosang, smiling up at him so widely that your cheeks ached. Yeosang looked stunned for a second before he returned your smile, biting his lower lip as he averted his gaze down to the ground, “I’d love that, but I want to do what makes you feel comfortable. If you think we should wait, then we will; if not…just let me know when it’s good for you and your parents.”

Yeosang nodded, his eyes finding yours, “You are so kind.”

“You are too, Yeosang.” You chuckled, and it was your time to look down. Yeosang seemed to feel proud over that compliment before he took off, guiding the two of you through the park.

“I don’t feel like we are rushing, but I think it’s more responsible if we go on a few dates first.” You felt like a high school girl, wanting to squeal over the fact that you’d be going on dates with Yeosang, “My parents are nice people, but they are…well, they had gotten a bit desperate about me finding my soulmate. Honestly, they thought you were dead.”

Well, that thought had never crossed your mind before, but it definitely didn’t sit well with you as you looked at Yeosang with a frown. His expression looked neutral, but he squeezed your hand, “I’m twenty-seven, so they think I’m too old to be single. My parents’ families were close friends, so they’ve always known they are soulmates. They had it easy, so it was weird seeing their son struggle to find his soulmate.”

“Did it hurt you? That you sought me out without success for so long?” You found yourself asking, curious to know how Yeosang felt. He seemed to think for a second, humming as he looked down at his cup of coffee.

“It was frustrating at first, mostly because my parents were also pressuring me.” He looked at you from the corner of his eyes, then shrugged, “Then I realised I wouldn’t find you faster if I made myself mull over it, so I just let it go. Since we are fated to be together, I realised I couldn’t trick fate and quicken the process.”

You hummed in agreement, realising you’ve had a similar mindset to Yeosang’s for the past one or two years, “I’m twenty-five and had lost hope at some point. My parents, similar to yours, met very early on, in middle school. I thought I’d also find my soulmate around that time, and when it didn’t happen, I thought it would come in high school…but then that didn’t happen either, and I felt disheartened, like something was wrong with me. And then I realised I can’t push something that isn’t meant to happen just yet.”

“I’m sorry I made you wait.” Yeosang’s answer was quick, his hand squeezing yours as your eyebrows furrowed.

“Don’t apologise, the wait was worth it in the end.” You giggled, averting your eyes shily.

“Yeah?” Yeosang sounded surprised, perhaps even a bit cocky, “You think so?”

“I think that you’re very handsome, Yeosang, and soft.” There was no reason to be embarrassed in front of your soulmate, certainly not when it came to complimenting him, “You have an aura of kindness and brightness around you; I think it’s everything I wanted in a partner.”

Yeosang was smiling widely again, nodding his head as he became shy once again, “You’re cute and vibrant; your smile makes my heart race. I’m thankful that you are my soulmate.”

You stopped walking, the sudden urge to hug Yeosang wasn’t something you could control, so you threw your arms around his torso and leaned into him, smiling to yourself as your head landed on his shoulder. Yeosang’s arms were quick to go around you, squeezing you into himself, and you realised he smelled like oranges and fresh grass, refreshing and calming. You loved the fresh smell of nature, and you loved Yeosang’s natural fragrance. You heard a chuckle, and suddenly something was plucked out of your hair, making your eyebrows furrow as you slightly pulled back, looking at Yeosang’s hand. A dry leaf was between his fingers, his expression amused.

“You’re like a garden fairy, do bees gravitate towards you during summer?” You laughed and shook your head, feeling a bit embarrassed as Yeosang pocketed the leaf instead of letting it fall to the ground. Your cheeks burned as you two let go of each other, fingers naturally intertwining as you headed for a bench, “Why did you choose to become a florist?”

You sat down on the bench, facing each other, and Yeosang’s knee brushed lightly against your thigh. You held your cup of tea in both hands, playing with it as you looked down in your lap, “Well, I just really love nature. I’ve always felt at ease around my little plants in my room, and then I realised I just really love flowers. They are so beautiful and tender, you have to nurture them and take care of them as if they were human. I feel like I have a connection to nature; it’s like I can be completely myself around all that beauty—and the colours! Oh, I love their colours, they are so gorgeous! I’m so glad you walked into the shop yesterday. I had no idea I was missing out on—so much!”

Yeosang watched with fascination on his face as you spoke, a little overexcited that he wanted to hear your hobbies and likes. It was only normal; you’d have to gradually get to know each other, yet it still felt surreal that the sky was an almost transparent blue, the clouds completely white, the barks of the trees various shades of brown, the grass so green, all the leaves, and all the colourful flowers. You loved seeing all the colour on people, too, how they expressed themselves by their outfits, all the colours inside buildings and outside. You’d have to buy some more colourful furniture for your room since it’s mostly beige and yellow. You wanted to cover your world in the colours of the rainbow, in every possible hue and shade.

“Yes, the world is so…intense now, vibrant. It’s impressive how I could live without it all.” Yeosang’s deep voice was soft and quiet as if he was speaking to himself, “I like being in nature, surrounded by wildlife, away from the noisy city. We could go on hikes and maybe even camping.”

You nodded eagerly, having fond memories of the hikes you had gone on with your friends and family, “I’d really love that, Yeosang. I’ve always wanted to go camping, but my parents don’t like bugs, so we never stayed out after nightfall.”

Both you and Yeosang laughed at that, and then you were eager to learn too about Yeosang, “I imagine you love children since you are a daycare teacher; how did you realise that?”

“It’s nothing too revolutionary,” Yeosang chuckled, finishing his cup of coffee, “I would babysit for our neighbours when I was a teenager, and then my cousin had a baby brother, and I’d spend a lot of time with them. As I was growing up, I realised I was fond of those little ones, so…it just happened, I guess.”

You nodded, understanding him, “Would you want children?”

The answer was obvious to that, but you still wanted to ask, “Definitely, if you’d also like to have children, of course.”

Your whole face flushed, and you coughed, a little taken off-guard by Yeosang’s direct answer. His eyebrows raised and his ears flushed, and suddenly he was stumbling over his words, “I mean—like, whoever is my partner, I care about that! You know, like, whatever my partner wants—whether it’s you or someone else, not that I’m thinking of anyone else—but I’m just…yeah, I think that was too soon, wasn’t it?”

He was adorable, you had to shield your mouth with your hand as you laughed quietly, shaking your head at Yeosang, “I mean, since we are soulmates, I don’t think any topic is too soon, Yeosang.”

“Yeah?” Yeosang asked, not quite looking at you yet, “Right, I mean, sure, that makes sense.”

Comfortable silence settled over the two of you, and you picked a stray string off Yeosang’s knee. He watched you quietly, taking in your serene expression, and your eyes met as you raised your head. You smiled at Yeosang without saying anything for a second, then chuckled, this whole situation feeling unreal. Just yesterday, your whole world was covered in grey and hues of brown, amber and copper—and now, your soulmate sat next to you on a bench, the world infused with so much colour you still weren’t used to it, and to top it off, your soulmate was kind and loving, good with children and soft-spoken despite his uncharacteristically deep voice. His face was gentle, his features almost as if they were sculpted by Greek Gods, his burgundy hair even curlier than yesterday as it was pinned back by a little pink bow, and it made you wonder if it was a child from the daycare that had placed it there. Yeosang’s expression looked a bit baffled as you continued to stare at him without saying a word, and not wanting to look weird, you spoke up, “I’m just admiring you because I cannot believe you are real.”

A surprised gasp left Yeosang’s lips at your words, and he didn’t shy away this time, leaning forward to tuck a stray piece of hair behind your ear. You grinned as he caressed your cheek, his palm warm and his skin soft, and for a second, you forgot there was anyone else in the world beside the two of you, “I’m as real as it can be, and I’m here to stay, by your side, for an eternity, Y/N.”

And your heart skipped another beat hearing his words, your body freezing when Yeosang suddenly started leaning towards you. You were ready, if he wanted to kiss you, then you wanted to feel his plush lips against yours. Your eyes fluttered closed as it felt like your heart was in your throat, but instead of kissing your lips, you felt something warm press against your cheek, underneath your left eye, then your right eye, and it felt more intimate than any other kiss. You bit your bottom lip and opened your eyes, staring deeply into Yeosang’s rich brown ones, an almost red-like hue licking around his irises.

“Would you like to spend the rest of your day with me, Yeosang?”

“I don’t think I want to spend any time away from you from now on, Y/N.”

And you knew in your heart, in your whole being, that the future ahead of you two was bright, vibrant, gentle, and so, so colourful.

© HONGJOONGSPOETRY & BVIDZSOO 2025 - All rights reserved. Copying, editing, reposting or translating our work is not allowed.

[babsbabbles]

Can you tell me about your post about Jacob? Does thinking about him bring you comfort? How? I have a friend who was in a bad car accident recently and is struggling with trusting God.

Firstly, I'm sorry for the slow reply. I wanted to make sure I spent the time to truly collect my thoughts on Jacob and what his story means to me. I don't know how universal they will be in application - in fact I know they wouldn't be comforting to most people, because they hinge on ideas that people tend to find distressing.

I have chronic illnesses that will never heal. They got bad quick after laying dormant in my body for decades. There are no cures. I will never run again because it is extremely damaging. I pay for the weather changing. I pay for the things I eat or do not eat. I pay for staying still. I pay for moving. I will constantly have to barter with a body that is weak and tired in ways few can comprehend to do the things my mind loves. There are people who would call this suffering. Most people would pity me the things I have endured. Most people would hate to become me.

God allowed this suffering to happen to me. God has absolute sovereignty over the universe and he allows it to groan with pains, sin cursed as it is. There is illness and pain in this world because he allows it. He may have built me perfectly, knew me in my mothers womb perfectly, but he has allowed what has happened to do so.

When I finally had awareness of what happened, I was distraught, I was furious. I had done nothing wrong and God had allowed this? Didn't he care? I had worked so hard and fought for so much, I wanted the most of life and I did everything in my power to get it - to show myself approved the way my father always prayed for me - and now even sitting upright puts a pain in my skull that clouds my vision and my thoughts. I demanded the blessings my mother claimed that had been given me when I was young. Where were they? I railed at God about it all.

Jacob was the same. His name was "heel, deceit, supplanting". His story in the bible is full of him lying and being lied to, stealing and being stolen from, manipulating and being manipulated. He followed God where he was lead, and was constantly looking for better. When he left to go face his brother for the first time after stealing everything from him, he ran from his father-in-law with everything that was his, and he sent all his family and possessions ahead of him, and he was alone when God came to him.

Jacob fought God all night. He held tight to God until he was wounded. He wrestled with God until he was blessed and renamed for his efforts.

Jacob became Israel and he was crippled: he limped for the rest of his days. He could no longer run from the consequences of all he had done, but God provided for him, and blessed him, and was there for him anyway.

The gifts God gave him were nothing he could do of his own power, and he could never claim that they were.

So. Even when I was furious and exhausted and full of sorrow over all I had lost and all I could still come to lose because of the things that had happened to me, even when I doubted God could ever have a plan for my life, even when I wrestled God nightly, I could still take comfort in him. The God of the Universe, the Author of Reality, had let this happen to me, but he had never left. If I was wrestling with God, he was still there, still listening, still holding on to me; I was still worth something. If I am still worth something when I am browbeating my own Creator because I think I know better, or I cannot drag myself out of bed from pain, or I am crawling across the floor because dizziness refusing to allow me upright, or am weeping for hours over something that was never mine, or am exhausted beyond my own mortal ken, or yes, when my hips or my fingers go out of joint, know that I don't need to be strong, or fast, or capable, or anything at all. God has me in his hands. He has met me face to face. I have struck him.

He hasn't let go.

[joshuamj]

LOOK WHAT I GOT

[kuiinncedes]

me when chain of thorns

[caramelmochacrow]

"Are you alright, Miss?"

[girlivealwaysbean]

i think growing up is just life repeatedly sucker punching you and saying bitch you thought things were gonna better lmao no you're so naive and stupid for having hope in 20 years the world will be flaming bag of garbage and no matter how hard you work you'll get eliminated at some point

[icewindandboringhorror]

"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"

I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming

[em-b-sides]

I think about that tiktok trend where you like paint your partners eye color on your nails or make a bracelet or something with the color a lot actually

[tanicus-caesareth]

guarana drama, damage control

[gibbearish]

its occuring to me what specifically it is that therapists go to therapy for

[sundial-bee-scribbles]

me to me: girl. girl don't fucking do it OUR COMPUTER STORAGE SPACE. AND WE'RE PROBABLY NEVER GONNA ACTUALLY USE THEM GIRL. GIRL!!! me: but... free software... its free......

[shayberri789]

I'm a little hurt by some of my irl friends and have two courses of actions, but which will both have similar outcomes

Basically, I have three creative irl friends. Every time they share their writings with me (be it fics, poems, stories or creative non fic), I ALWAYS read it as soon as I'm able and give feedback + healthy amount of gushing.

But whenever I write something I am proud of and I share it with them, none of them acknowledge it. Its like they don't see the link you know. And its fine because I just say "I wrote a thing" and give a link. I'm explicitly asking for feedback or validation. I can't be upset because they're not mind readers

But sometimes I explicitly DO ask them "hey did you see what I wrote?" "Hey, what do you think of this?" And i get half assed responses at best. "Oh its good" "uh ill read it when I get home *never hears about it again*". And that's a little more frustrating.

Earlier today I needed to put together a portfolio, and asked my two best friends to please read through it, because it was important and I needed their input on (1) thing, and I needed it *before the end of the day*. It was three pages of easy reading. Its not like I was asking for concrit or editing or something time consuming.

One of them skimmed it and gave me feedback. The other one is adhd and forgot. Said she'd read it later when I reminded her. When I reminded her again, she said she forgot and had made plans, can she do it in the morning?

And normally I'd say that's fine! Because I don't expect immediacy from my friends online, esp for favours. But I had a deadline, and this was the third time this particular friend has done this. There's only so many times I want to poke someone to read my shit before I start feeling like I'm bragging/attention seeker/being entitled and demanding. So I just went and asked someone else.

I know I'm valid to feel hurt about this, and frustrated. I also know that my friends don't mean to make me feel like this, or forget. I know they want to support me. But I'm also tired of getting burned so I'm just going to fucking stop trying to share my writing with them because instead of validation I'm getting pain.

My two options are either a) telling my friends that actually their silence and forgetfulness hurt me or b) just lettint it go

Either way, I'm not reaching out again. B) seems like the option less likely to hurt my friends/make them feel bad, so I'm leaning to that. If the roles were reversed, I'd rather option A), because when people tell me these things I do genuinely try to do better in the future, and I know my friends would feel the same. But I've also lost faith in their ability to do so in this area. Idk what I should do

[opens-up-4-nobody]

...