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jiminrings · 4 years ago

Note

I REQUEST A SOFT BADBOY DRABBLE WITH SHY READER AND HES TEASING HER BUT SOMEONE ELSE JOIMS IN AND THEYRE DOING IT TO BE MEAN BUT HES LIKE STFU BEFORE I PUMCH UR FACE ONLY IM ALLOWED TO BULLY SHY READER GRR 😡😡😡😡 and soft readers like 0.o but *squeals incoherently* 😭😭😭😭

last name, jeon.

drabble week: day two

drabble week masterlist

pairing: badboy!jungkook x shy!reader

wordcount: 3k

glimpse: "can't you tell that i really don't want you to be here?"

notes: a tiny change on the plot!! also: frat boy!jimin from day four makes an appearance :D

feedback + support mean the world to me!!

“do you wanna form-“

... yes

you DO have an alliance with jungkook

it's a very fair trade honestly

he pretends to be your boyfriend!! there's no specific boundaries to it, but he springs into action as soon as you're put into an inconvenience

in exchange, you whore him out to your friends!!! :D

no but literally that's how he called it

the whole reason this came to be in the first place is because you hATE confrontation with a burning passion

especially when it comes to those "i have a crush on you" moments that people spring on you all of a sudden

you don't like them back!!! that's the truth!!! but the problem is that you aLWAYS feel guilty letting people down

you obviously don't have the obligation to like someone back just because you sit next to them in class :// IT'S JUST IN YOUR NATURE TO FEEL THAT WAY

you wouldn't get into a relationship with said confessor to ease your guilt, clearly

do you plan on denying their advances? yes

but hOW????

you always take the passive-aggressive approach

you get jungkook to carry your bag and hold your hand, walk in front of said person and pretend not to see them, jungkook makes sURE to put some snide eye contact in there aaaaand the whole ordeal is finished :D

you've managed to let someone down slowly without having to speak to them in-person!!!

jungkook comes more handy than that too

you take him when you want to eat out because you're too anxious to eat alone

you take him when you want to go somewhere in which lining up is essential and you're also too anxious to stand by yourself

you take him when you want to go shopping when there's a sale but you're almost always intimidated by the barrage of people and salespeople so he asks and answers the questions for you

jungkook, in hindsight, is the perfect fake boyfriend for you <3

ALSO jungkook wants something from you

"whore me out to the girls from the families your family's friends with, and it's a deal :D"

that alliance and exchange is going pretty well so far

you mAY be on the more-reserved side but that doesn't mean you're self-aware!!!

you know that your parents are loaded and your shy nature could be somehow chalked to that since you didn't really have anyone that wasn't as non-superficial as you'd like, since they were the overprotective helicopter two-rotor seven-blade parents :(((

jungkook, however, is the only constant you have in your formula

you've known him since childhood and have been friends ever since

his mom's your mom's personal assistant, and one day when mrs. jeon couldn't find a babysitter for jungkook, your mom didn't hesitate to let four-year old jungkook come with her to work

jungkook's your fIRST actual friend that hates gold spoons with you because of how tacky they look :-) he's your emotional support person basically

your emotional support person who was sO close to running late from picking you up during his free day >:( you were about to break into a sprint if he arrived a second later, because you managed to spot a jock coming to you from the corner of your eye awhile ago

You Do Not Like Him <3

"and i even changed into a short-sleeved shirt to ward off your suitors. how romantic of me, don't you think?"

now that he mentions it, it's only now when you can drink him in in full-display

... wow

his right arm's the only one with his tattoos while his left's completely blank, but something about the balance just makes you !!!!!!!! even more

his arm's not completely covered but it was coming to be, something about the blank spaces of skin that are yet to be inked being a nice touch

"very romantic, kook."

now tHAT'S the answer he wanted to hear

he forcibly on your helmet for you to showcase, your grunts of annoyance being drowned out by whistling

(he's even looking left and right and making eye contact with anyone who has their eyes landing on you!!!!)

your cheeks smushed is a look he'll never be tired being in awe of, but he'll never tell you that, of course

"do you ever wonder if your parents would kill me if i misplace even a single hair on you?" jungkook thinks out loud and you don't even flinch with how sudden his thoughts could be, sitting on his seat first so it'd already be balanced when you do, "you sure you’re okay riding with me?? on a motorcycle????"

he usually uses yOUR family's vehicles (they let him and insisted he just takes one at this point) but when you called him, he was en route to kim kradle (it's a one-stop vehicle shop apparently) to get new rims for his motorcycle, bUT NOT ANYMORE HE GUESSES????

you come first compared to the booking he's waited on for three weeks

"i have insurance, i think."

no that's the wrong answer

why did you even bother.,,.,

jungkook flicks your nose because your forehead's protected by the helmet, his face contorted in half faux frustration

"you were supposed to be mad at me for asking that — not logical!! don't even joke about that."

"... my life insurance? like, in the instance that i-"

oW THAT HURT

he flicked even harder this time!!!

you roll your eyes at him and it doesn't go unnoticed, a hand outstretching instead of his fingers flexing

“wallet, please.”

????

jungkook's surprised that you even look confused, this time rolling his eyes at you

“you rolled your eyes at me. you need to bribe me so i won’t rat you out.”

right

he has a never-ending knack for the you're rich jokes

you also know that he likes the cold and would turn the fan on even if it's too hot for a blanket, just because he wants to feel cocooned

you also know that he picks from the fourth row of drinks from the front because it's always been a habit

("the germs cling on to the first row!!!")

you also know that maybe, just maybe, you can't stand it tonight when he's putting himself out there instead of being your faux boyfriend

you keep on zoning out and hoseok, perhaps the only tolerable fellow rich kid you can tolerate within your circle, finally connects the dots in his head and snickers

he's been talking about finding the vintage sneakers he's always wanted on depop and how he almost got scammed for like tWENTY minutes already

in reality, all your nods and scowls aren't towards his story

it's to jungkook and... who's that? jihye whose dad is so colossally shitty, that this one rapper wrote a diss song for him? oh yeah, that jihye

"you like him. like actually 'lose your virginity to him' love him."

WHAT???

there's no way

"how did you-"

"you blush like one."

alright that answer was too quick

hoseok should've ATLEAST tried to wait for a few seconds before answering

"a-and the love part?"

"babe, jungkook may not be the richest one here and that should say a lot," you peer up at him nervously and he actually chuckles, peering to everyone at this function, "dude's humble — he could also just be dense to not see you love him."

okay very true

hobi's making a dig rn at how jungkook coinicidentaally happens to be blonde and maybe this is your cue to leave

hobi does not realize that his hair is aLSO dyed blonde while talking shit about jungkook and his hari

okay this is it

once again, you are NOT listening to hoseok and he's figured out what you're doing by now

you're psyching yourself up with a couple of shots and your heels are digging on the carpeted ballroom

MAYBE YOU SHOULD TRY TO BE MORE OUTGOING!!

"pretend to wobble. it doesn't help that nothing can sink you."

oh okay makes sense

if you're gonna try and charm jungkook while trying to play it off as just being tipsy playfulness, atleast make it believable

hoseok snickers because this is just A+ content with the things that you choose to do in your way

shy girl with high alcohol tolerance mannn coming of age film writers would LOVE you ://

you're about to cross the distance between you and jungkook, but something knocks you on your shoulder with a gentle force that seemed intentional

is that-

hold on a second

"what a coincidence :O"

jimin?

jimin???

as in, wholesome yet slightly fuckboy-ish frat guy jimin???

he looks dashing and composed, meeting your eyes perfectly and he doesn't let your confusion startle him

"i know that look. what am i doing here?"

he says it eloquently as if he's practiced it

AND HE DID!!!

you must've looked so shocked that you immediately apologized, shaking your head no

"i-i didn’t mean-..."

you're confused, sure, but that doesn't mean you're immediately judging

it's just that you never saw jimin here or any function of the like, but you wouldn't put it past him if he does go to these things!!! he looks like a million dollars anyways

"relax, doll. you’re so far the only other person i know that i've seen in these type of things."

he looks calm and collected, but maybe that's just because he spent the last five minutes waiting for you to stand so he could bump into you

this place is just sO suffocating and a familiar face is gonna be his relief from something so fancy that it became mundane

"have we been in the same event before this?"

"not that i recall, no. i get invited but this is only the first time after awhile that i went."

jimin drinks from his champagne flute, wiggling his eyebrows playfully, "wanna know why i'm here?"

you're curious!!! what can you say!!!!

you never really interacted with jimin at all before this, but a familiar face like his is comforting

because hoseok's already engaged in another conversation and jungkook's,,,, being jungkook and is fawning all over jihye

jimin chuckles at your insistent nodding, leaning closer to whisper to your ear

"my stepdad’s loaded as fuck."

oh so that's why

he tugs you down to sit at the nearest possible empty chairs, all its occupants gone anyways because they're in the dancefloor busting tRULY horrendous moves

maybe it's because jimin feels lonely too like you are, and it's him feeling comfortable because he's pulled you like ten seconds ago and not once asked him anything out of bounds

maybe that's why he fell into conversation with you easily because you're always intently listening

"might love me as a real son too. maybe that’s a bonus? you don’t really expect that shit in the things you see."

this situation is actually pretty cute

you snort because maybe you’re nOT that shy when you drink,, that’s the only thing that changes in you probably

this whole conversation that sprung from boredom was unknowingly the subject of many stares, including jungkook who you were initially supposed to go to

“you’re worthy of love, jimin.”

jimin sPITS his drink because where the fuck did THAT come from???

why did you say that and why does he feel that he needed to hear that

“i-i think — i think you need more,” he raises his own glass to your lips hurriedly, caught in surprise but you still gulp nonetheless

“you’re-“ you keep sputtering as he keeps making you drink, but he rubs circles on your back at the same time and it's when you realize that jimin the frat guy may not be that bad, “what??? don’t think you’re not the only one with daddy issues! shouldn’t we have like, a radar for each other?”

jimin snorts at your counter and his eyes crinkle to the point where he can't see anything, not being able to see how you're still trying to recover with all that fizz down your throat

wow ur really enjoyable to talk to

“you’re insane and i think-“

listen

you're not really big on feeling beyond a sense and all that stuff, but you feel as if the aura around you just got dark all of a sudden

"who are you calling insane?"

jungkook appears at your side in an instant, hands wrapped around your shoulders while you remain seated

you've honestly forgotten that you were supposed to go to jungkook, but you're reminded of that vERY clearly now

"go away, jimin," he mutters through his teeth, looking at him dead in the eye

hold on

wait

THAT'S JIMIN???

okay now he's confused

sometimes jungkook's mouth just moves on its own without loading the thought process

"why are YOU here?"

jimin furrows his brows, shocked that he'd even see jungkook here out of all people

the guy barely even attends classes!!! and that's coming from him!!

"why’s he here?"

he crouches to your ear, eyes still furrowed at the younger guy

"long story."

nO???

jungkook scowls bitterly because jesus fuck

YOU’RE ON WHISPERING TERMS NOW????

he left for one second, and the moment he comes back, that's when this fucking frat guy approaches you?? was he waiting on him to leave??

you and jungkook only act as a couple when the need arises, and even if you don't feel it, hE feels that this is the need!!! this is the need and it is arising!!!

"get back to uh, alpha bravo charlie or something, park. beat it."

why’s he reciting the nato phonetic alphabet???

jungkook sounds half-angry and half-sad at the same time, and you don't know which side should you focus on

“move,” he repeats this time again but more sternly, making jimin much more confused since jungkook's trying to pull him away from his seat

jimin doesn't budge and it makes the frown even more evident in jungkook's face

what is he FEELING

“can’t you tell that i really don’t want you to be here?”

“i’m not here for you, though. i’m here for y/n.”

he answers honestly, shis gut telling him that there's definitely something going on between the two of you

“y/n doesn’t want you here," kook argues back surely, only noticing your bitten lips now that makes him realize that you're not exactly sober; just a happy kind of rush

he sees you raise your hand timidly, an equally cheeky smile on your face that's only directed to jungkook like it's meant for him

"i-i actually don’t mind."

you don't,,,

you don't mind?

HOW'S THAT POSSIBLE

WHAT ARE YOU DOING

why aren't you signaling him to commence the faux boyfriend act!!

"y/n has a boyfriend."

“... i’m not hitting on her.”

alright this is more than the entertainment that jimin wished for lol

“yeah, well she has a boyfriend still so beat it.”

you do??

the last time you checked, jihye's gonna have jungkook as her boyfriend within the night!!

“i don-“

ALRIGHT THEN

jimin decides to indulge jungkook, knocking his knee with yours as he winks slyly, urging you silently to watch on, turning to look at you and ask

“what’s your boyfriend’s name?”

you don't answer.

that gives him all the more reason to do so.

“last name, jeon.”

jungkook looks the most determined you've ever seen him, eyes characteristically angry with his arms across his chest that his suit tightens, “first name, me.”

....

......

the three of you know that’s not the truth

jimin takes it in, sighing when he sense that something else is about to be unfold and he does noT want to be a part of it

not before whispering to your ear again for the last time, of course

“pretty weird name if you ask me,” you laugh automatically, momentarily forgetting that jungkook's standing by you on just your opposite side and could hear you

he leaves and that only leaves you with jungkook, looking up at him as he's too frantic to even sit

“what are you doing?”

“being a social butterfly," you quip just as fast, drinking your water afterwards

jungkook only clenches his jaw by then, being taken-aback when you speak again

“who are you doing?”

://

“i’m busy being mad at- wait a minute, WHO???”

who instead of what??

the short-lived enthusiasm you had with jimin left with him, crashing just as hard when you're reminded of jungkook's presence

“jihye’s a pretty nice girl. you should go home early tonight.”

his brows furrow, trying to get you to look at him but you avoid his gaze insistently, “what? what are you talking about?”

“she’s not my girlfriend though.”

you're not at all satisfied with the answer because it sounds so wrong, knowing that jungkook's a handsome guy and everyone wants to be with him!!!

and he probably wants to be with everyone else besides you.

“then who-...”

“don’t know yourself anymore? jimin must’ve really swept you off your feet, huh?”

jungkook huffs as he qualifies for a rebutt, your internal wallowing being cut short

“he’s not my boyfriend.”

...

....

“well would you look at that,” jungkook snickers, sighing through his nose as your eyes finally meet his, directly stubborn yet soft around the edges

“she’s not my girlfriend, and he’s not your boyfriend. what a coincidence.”

god did he feel so threatened the moment his eyes couldn't find you besides hobi and instead next to jimin, eyes crinkled in laughter without hesitation

have you been chasing after one another this whole time?

jungkook silently grabs you by the hand and you wave no opposition to it

maybe it's your liquor-influenced vision or maybe it's you hyperfixating on such a warm moment, but your eyes immediately lock to see the matching red thread bracelet he wore like yours

you're dressed in next year's spring collection line, and the structured silk black gown that has a train behind it doesn't exactly scream to have a simple red thread bracelet as its accessory according to your mom's designer and everyone else —

but you don't have the heart to take it off

there's no need to take it off

jungkook drives your car and no one says a single thing about anything

his hand’s on your thigh and you don’t question it, eyes locking into the way his hand looks perfect and the way the bracelet looks meant to be wrapped in his wrist in the first place

you're sure this time that it's not the newfound courage you have, but rather the need to do it

you kiss jungkook's cheek on a red light.

it's on a red light that jungkook realizes he could fit the visage of his world within one hand, finally kissing you like he's always wanted to

“yeah. what a coincidence.”

#drabble week #jungkook imagine #jungkook imagines #jungkook oneshot #jungkook oneshots #jungkook x reader #jungkook x y/n #jungkook au #jungkook headcanons #jungkook fanfic #jeon jungkook imagine #jungkook angst #jungkook angst imagine #jungkook fluff #jeon jungkook oneshots

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itsclydebitches · 4 years ago

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I keep seeing people calling Good Omens queer bating and a I can't help but ask why? I read the Aziraphale/Crowley relationship threw an Ace lens and they are clearly as close to married as they are probably going to get without stepping on holy ground.... and they love each other... why is it considered queer bating?

Personally, I think it's mostly young queer fans turning legitimate grievances on the wrong target. A case of getting so fed up with queerbaiting in media as a whole that they're instinctually lashing out at anything that seems to resembles it on the surface, without taking the time to consider whether this is, in fact, the thing they're mad at. Good Omens is a scapegoat, if you will. The equivalent of snapping at your partner after a long day. Your friend was an asshole, your boss was an asshole, the guy in traffic was an asshole, and then you come home to your partner who says something teasing and you take it as another asshole comment because you've just been surrounded by assholeness all day, to the point where your brain is primed to see an attack. Your partner wasn't actually an asshole, but by this point you're (understandably) too on guard to realize that. Unless someone sits you down and kindly reminds you of the difference between playful teasing and a legitimate insult - the nuance, if you will - your hackles are just gonna stay up and you'll leave the room, off to phone a different friend to tell them all about how your partner was definitely an asshole to you.

Only in this case, that "friend" is a fan on social media doing think pieces on the supposed queerbaiting of Good Omens, spreading that idea to a) people who aren't familiar with the show themselves and b) those who, like that original fan, have come to expect queerbaiting and thus aren't inclined to question the latest story with that mark leveled against it. Because on the surface Good Omens can look a lot like queerbaiting. Here are two queer coded characters who clearly love each other, but don't say "I love you," don't kiss, don't "prove" that love in a particular way. So Gaiman is just leading everyone on, right?

Well... no. This is where the nuance comes in, the thing that many fans aren't interested in grappling with (because, like it or not, media is not made up of black and white categories; queerbaited and not-queerbaited. Supernatural's finale is proof enough of that...) I won't delve into the most detailed explanation here, but suffice to say:

Gaiman has straight up said it's a love story. He's just not giving them concrete labels like "gay" or "bi" or "asexual," etc. because they are literally not human. Gaiman has subscribed to an inclusive viewpoint in an era where fans are desperate for unambiguous rep that homophobes cannot possibly deny. The freedom to prioritize any interpretation - yes, including a "just friends" interpretation - now, in 2021, feels like a cop-out. However, in this case it's an act of world building (they are an angel and a demon, not bound by human understanding of identity) meeting a genuine desire to make these characters relatable to the entire queer community, not just particular subsets. Gaiman has said they can be whatever we want because the gender, sexuality, and romantic attraction of an angel and a demon is totally up for debate! However, some fans have interpreted that as a dismissal of canonical queerness; the idea that fans can pretend they're whatever they want... but it's definitely not canon. It is though. Them being queer is 100% canon, it's just up to us to decide what kind of queer they are. This isn't Gaiman stringing audiences along, it's him opening the relationship up to all queer possibilities.

We know he's not stringing us along (queerbaiting) because up until just a few days ago season two didn't exist. Queerbaiting is a deliberate strategy to maintain an audience. A miniseries does not need to maintain its audience. You binge it in one go and you're done, no coming back next year required. The announcement for season two doesn't erase that context for season one. No one knew there would be more content and thus the idea that they would implement a strategy designed to keep viewers hooked due to the hope for a queer relationship (with no intent to follow through) is... silly.

In addition, this interpretive, queer relationship between Crowley and Aziraphale existed in the book thirty years ago. Many fans are not considering the difference between creating a totally new story in 2019 and faithfully adapting a story from 1990 in 2019. Good Omens as representation meant something very different back then and that absolutely impacts how we see its adaptation onto the small screen. To put this into perspective, Rowling made HUGE waves when she revealed that she "thought of" Dumbledore as gay in an interview... in 2007. Compare that to the intense coding 17 years before. Gaiman was - and still is - pushing boundaries.

Which includes being an established ally, particularly in his comics. Queerbaiting isn't just the act of a single work, but the way an author approaches their work. Gaiman does not (to my knowledge) have that mark against him and even if he did, he's done enough other work to offset that.

Finally, we've got other, practical issues like: how do you represent asexuality on the screen? How do you show an absence of something? Yeah, one or both of them could claim that label in the show, outright saying, "I'm asexual," but again, Gaimain isn't looking to box his mythological figures into a single identity. So if we want that rep... we have to grapple with the fact that this is one option for what it looks like.

Even if he did want to narrow the representation down to just a few identities for the show, should Gaiman really be making those major changes when he's only one half of the author team? Pratchett has, sadly, passed on and thus obviously has no say in whether his characters undergo such revisions. Even if fans hate every other argument, they should understand that, out of respect, Good Omens is going to largely remain the same story it was 30 years ago.

And those 6,000 years are just the beginning! Again, this was meant to be a miniseries of a single novel, a novel that, crucially, covered only Crowley and Aziraphale's triumph in being able to love one another freely. That's a part of their personal journey. Yeah, they've been together in one sense for 6,000 years, but that was always with hell and heaven on their backs, to say nothing of the slow-burn approach towards acknowledging that love, for Aziraphale in particular. We end the story at the start of their new relationship, one that is more free and open than it ever was before. They can be anything to one another now! The fact that we don't see that isn't a deliberate attempt on the author's part to deny us that representation, but only a result of the story ending.

So yeah, there's a lot to consider and, frankly, I don't think those fans are considering it. Which on a purely emotional level I can understand. I'm pissed about queerbaiting too and the knee-jerk desire to reject anything that doesn't meet a specific standard is understandable. But understandable doesn't mean we don't have to work against that instinct because doing otherwise is harmful in the long run. We need to consider when stories were published and what representation meant back then. We need to consider how we adapt those stories for a modern audience. We need to acknowledge that if we want the inclusivity that "queer" provides us, that includes getting characters whose identity is not strictly defined by the author as well as characters with overtly canonical labels. We need both. We likewise need to be careful about when having higher standards ends up hurting the wrong authors - who are our imperfect allies vs. those straight up unwilling to embrace our community at all? And most importantly, we have to think about how we're using the terms we've developed to discuss these issues. Queerbaiting means something specific and applying it to Good Omens not only does Good Omens a disservice, but it undermines the intended meaning of "queerbaiting," making it harder to use correctly in the future. Good Omens is not queerbaiting and trying to claim it is only hurts the community those fans are speaking up for.

#good omens #mymetas #queer

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hetalia-has-a-secretary · 4 years ago

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allies + eje human au headcanons

I had to look up what eje meant, which was Axis in Spanish 🌮 (there's no sombrero emoji, and I'm mad about it). This is mostly a college Human AU, but there's still some future stuff in there. Enjoy the longest list of Headcannons in one post lol

Human AU Hetalia!

Allies:

America:

Has rich parents, but doesn't tell anyone, and somehow his big house that everyone parties at doesn't give it away.

The only person who knows is Japan, and that's specifically because Japan's dad works for America's dad.

Is a college student, hoping to go for some kind of music degree.

A first year.

Black T-shirt and jeans. Has a plaid button up for everyday of the month, usually has it tied around his hips.

Has like, one basic tux and refuses to wear anything but converse or airwalkers.

Space nerd #1, except he's more into what's beyond our boundaries, and loves the constellations.

One of the most popular kids, and no matter how hard you try he's not easy to hate.

Gives off dumb college kid energy even though he's one of the A+ students.

His glasses are for show. It was meant to be a rebellious thing since Canada use to get bullied about his own glasses, now it's just an esthetic.

Skate boards and plays the acoustic guitar in his free time.

Jeans are usually missing the knee section.

Once set off firecrackers in a metal trash can as a school prank.

England:

Last year of college, majoring in history after failing his cooking classes.

Graphic tee central. We are unsure how many he has but he's up to 43 different shirts worn on campus.

Usually has his earbuds in, listening to punk rock.

Has an ungodly amount of bracelets. His favorite one is a black snap bracelet with little pirate skulls.

Was practically raised by his older brothers.

Lives alone, but is secretly an amazing writer.

Has a Tumblr blog he writes spooky stuff on.

Top of his class, but can be a dummy if he's put on the spot.

France:

No one is sure how he's been allowed to take nothing but art classes. No English, or science, just art.

Is also a transfer student, he's probably the second richest thanks to daddy.

Is the school stud, despite not sleeping with a single soul, and is actually extremely nervous about dating, and is just more comfortable with playful flirting.

He wants to be a fashion designer, or Model. Mostly a Designer.

Loose shirts and tight pants.

Has a weird obsession with belt sashes.

Plays violin like a god, and is a senior.

China:

Another senior in college.

Had the unfortunate event of being in the same cooking class as England before Arthur decided to switch degrees.

Still hangs out with him and Japan.

One of the few who is taking advanced classes, and is literally everyone's tutor.

Going for a Degree in Cooking. Wants to be a head chef.

His parents are over seas, but he promised to get them to America as soon as he can.

He wears a lot of colorful shirts that is always tucked into his pants.

Most of which look like bowling shirts, but he likes to add little Chinese patches to them. Has a signature jean jacket that is overwhelmed with patches.

Has a panda beenie baby keychain, so everyone knows exactly who it belongs to when he losses his keys.

Very quick to panic, and hates to admit he's wrong.

Russia:

Third and final transfer student, along with Japan, and France.

Poor confused child is trying so hard.

He's kind of shy, and is fully aware his social akwardness creeps everyone out.

Almost cried the day America and Prussia adopted him into the cool kid circle.

His broken english is probably the biggest turn off for the people at school. It's why no one really talks to him, mostly because they can't figure out what he's saying most of the time.

Biggest sweetheart though, and is painfully smart, but do to the english thing he's stuck in the average classes, but China comes swooping in and his english gets almost fluent by his third year.

He doesn't own a single thing tech, minus a flip phone, but somehow knows all the hot keys on the computer to every program, and it's only because he's lazy about it and it's the funniest thing.

Space nerd #2 but knows more about the planets and can name every single moon, and knows the history of space discoveries by heart.

Secretly a hopeless romantic, and doesn't realize he reads England's blog.

Is pretty much a closet goth, but likes bright colors too much to be seen in all black.

Knows way to much about torture devices and learned very quickly that gets you out casted in a school setting.

Isn't upset that he doesn't have many friends, but somehow attracts all the little kids from the grade school.

He likes his northface sweater, and loose pants. But his shirts are pretty colorful, and he likes collecting shoelaces.

He spends a lot of time in the woodwork shop, creating amazing figures and such.

Canada:

I can feel the dissapointed stares of Matt not being a photographer. Welp, guess he also gets a degree in art then.

Second year, Because he skipped one year in college.

Clothing style is long sleeves and vests.

He likes feeling fancy, and owns an endless amount of beanies.

One of the few people who talks to Russia.

His locker has a snot ton of polar bear stickers that everyone stuck to it, and he loves it.

Is baby but can kick butt in the wrestling club after school.

Has a tiny white Pomeranian that he rescued from it's mother who wouldn't take care of it, probably because the puppy was the runt of the litter.

Has a Harley Davidson and it's been painted black with the aurora on it, making everyone think it was his non-existent girlfriend's or something. Now it's a running joke.

Axis:

Germany:

He's not a jock, but he's friends with them.

Military Dad.

Is usually found hanging out in the gymnasium on breaks. It's quiet and no one is going to bother him. Usually.

Senior, and so ready to get the heck out of college.

Ladies love him, but he really hates the attention, like please help him.

Style wise he's pretty basic, but really loves his camo print.

Has owned countless doggos, and only attracted so many girls the day he walked to school with a fluffy poodle that France Hijacked for the day.

Doesn't ever go to dances after the first one and everyone tried to get him drunk, to no avail.

Had out drank some of the dumber students to shut them up.

Can be mean if you persistently pester him for dumb stuff, especially if he's already said no.

He's into construction and is working on a degree in Construction Management.

Japan:

Exchange student number 3

Degree in technology is what he desires.

Style = Geek, but like a stylish geek.

Him and Canada are in photography class together.

Japan is also part of the cool kids, but only when they're about to do some dumb stunt, and need a camera man.

Doesn't mind, loves watching them make fools of themselves.

Has a rebellious streak, and tends to be a complete sass.

As soon as something seems to go bad, he gone. He's heading towards the door. Been in detention once, and that was it.

Why does everyone go to him for advice when china is literally down the hall?

Rich kid #3 and his parents are traditional and are having a crisis over their son's rebellious attitude.

Italy:

Is a first year, and is oddly enough, going for a degree in history.

Really likes antiques and old artsy stuff.

Has a few shared classes with France, and they pretty much own those classes.

Rivals America's charisma, but isn't as popular due to:

Being seen around France, and not doing dumb and entertaining crap like america.

Gets picked on a lot Because he doesn't understand you can't be nice to the Jock's girlfriend without everyone thinking your flirting, even though you just needed directions on your first day of school.

Germany is now his bodyguard and he was kind of like "???" But they get closer the longer they hangout.

Fancy shirt man, like hand me downs from his Italian father. So they're really nice, and a lot of eye melting patterns.

Gets attached to people easily, and is sensitive when he gets taken advantage of during assignments, but toughs through it because he has too.

Has two cats literally named Mona, and Lisa.

Has cried at least once at school because he's a soft guy, but he gets a thicker shell the older he gets and learns to just laugh off other people's stupidity.

Romano:

Protective older brother gooooo

Second year in school, and his first year made him want to eat brinks.

Doesn't know what degree he wants, but settled for a degree in cooking.

Shares his brother's shirts practically and it confuses everyone Because, didn't Feliciano wear that shirt last week?

Immediately thinks people don't know washing machines exist Because of this, so his sass factor is high up there.

Doesn't really have friends, and also does not care. He's a bit of a lone wolf and needed something to do.

The amount of not caring attitude contrasts his high grades and his teachers are painfully confused by it.

Will jokingly tell people to fight him at McDonald's, and almost fought someone but literally laughed, and suggested they got something to eat instead.

He's somehow, in a bizarre and unwanted sense, everyone's brother which is just...

No one understands him, but they like him, and he doesn't know why and it kind of bugs him.

He's usually in the front of the school daydreaming about, god only knows what...

Is the epitomy of the "she doesn't even go here" joke from mean girls, except he does go to that school.

Why did he need a degree? Oh yeah, Because work places don't care what kind of paper, you just need a paper.

Prussia:

Rival friendship with america, and Russia has had to step in to break up petty fights.

He's not sure why he's part of the popular kids since he's so fricken chaotic and obnoxious. Or so he thinks.

Genuinely a sweet guy in his last year, desperately wanting a degree in mathematics. Like, no one understands why mathematics until he starts pulling card tricks from his pocket that deals with it, and blows everyone's mind.

He is also head of the newspaper club.

Has the style of a teenage band member and will not apologize for it.

Has hijacked the schools speaker system to blast evanescence, which gave a huge boost to his friendship with Russia, since the big fellow shares Prussia's taste in music.

Can eat a whole ghost pepper without batting an eyelash, and this is only Headcannon and a worthy note because he became sick the day after and the whole school had "in loving memory of Gilbert's stomach" posters all over the place.

Teacher's are very much done with his harmless antics. They're noticably stupid pranks, but only to the point it's annoying.

Like he managed to make all the teacher's computer backgrounds as Brad Pitt wearing a sombrero. There's no joke, and no punchline. It's just a poorly Photoshopped sombrero?

Races his brother to school every morning, and afternoon. Cops have stopped them at least twice due to other bystanders getting freaked out.

Him and Romano don't mix well, but try to leave each other alone.

#hetalia american #hetalia england #hetalia france #hetalia china #hetalia russia #hetalia canada #hetalia germany #hetalia italy #hetalia japan #hetalia romano #hetalia prussia #hetalia #hws #hetalia world stars #aph #human au

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enigma-im · 4 years ago

Text

The Less I Know The Better

Rating: Explicit Relationship: Imp!Black x F!Yellow Warning: Attempted murder, Among us fanfic, Monster sex, horror, comfort, angst, i’m not sorry

Word Count: 4916

Boyfriends can bring comfort, monster boyfriends can bring...

---------------------

"Hey, Blake, can you help me with coms? I've been stuck on that silly little radio for a while," I rock on my toes, hands clasped behind my back as I await his answer. For a good moment, he looks mostly confused, brows furrowed and mouth slightly open. It's curious, what is there to be so conflicted about?

"What," he gawks.

"Coms," I answer slowly," can you help?"

Blake stares down at me, looking sort of angry under the blatant confusion. I grow embarrassed having asked him. We don't talk much or anything, merely coworkers and nothing more. Perhaps I'm pushing a boundary I had no idea existed.

"Uh, sure," he answers almost like a question.

"Great," I perk up, twisting on my heel to walk away. I feel him reluctantly follow, throwing his hands into his tied off jumpsuit pockets. I toss a glance over my shoulder, giving him a bright smile of appreciation. He grunts in response.

We walk- more like I lead- to coms, awkward silence occupying the time. I stop over by the little frustrating radio to wait for Blake. He stops in the middle of the room, looking nervous but still. It's strange seeing his shoulder tick and his fingers fidget in his pockets but his face is so neutral.

"You ok," I ask. His forearm stiffens, barely noticeable fists clenched within his pockets.

"I'm fine," he says terse," what do you need my help on?"

I jump on the topic change, turning back to the radio. I turn it on, the horrid static blaring around the silent room. Wincing, I turn the volume down and begin fiddling with the knobs.

"Layla switched jobs with me this week because she is trying to get close to Bucky- which is understandable- and now I have the task of making sure the radio is up and operational. Which shouldn't be a hard job, just turn it on and off. Yet, lucky me, I have a radio that doesn't want to connect to anything and I don't know what to do," I answer, flicking the knobs this way and that. Listening closely to the change in static I just barely catch the sound of something wet snapping. I stop, curious above all else. The sound echoes again with a rip.

I twist around to the room, looking to Blake who is standing still in the middle of the room. He looks tense and his black shirt is askew with a single tear by his hip.

"Oh," I gasp," Your shirt? What happened?"

"Nothing," he answers shortly," let me see the radio an-"

I walk over, interrupting him," nonsense, I'm pretty good with sewing as my mother taught me when I was young. I'm sure I can fix that up. Accidents happen and I'm pretty sure Dax keeps an extra shirt around here." as I ramble I grab his shirt, looking to the tear with trained eyes. I'm sure I can fix this by tomorrow.

"uh," he keeps his arms away from me, uncomfortable to the max," ok."

I look to him, smiling sweetly before walking away in search of a clean shirt. I fiddle in a drawer, finding a dark green t-shirt for him to wear.

"This should do, you and Dax are big dudes," I hand him the shirt," I know you prefer wearing black but green would still be a good look for you. It will bring out your eyes and make you look quite handsome."

Blake seems lost as he grabs the shirt. He mutters a thanks, looking away flustered. I want to coo but keep the urge to myself. He grabs the hem of his shirt, hefting it over his body. I squeak, turning around with my own flustered face.

He changes quickly, handing me the shirt in his normal bored expression. Not wanting to dwell on the matter any longer he walks to the radio, twisting the knobs expertly.

It seems like ever since that day in coms Blake is always nearby. It's a huge comfort as conflict engulfs the crew. Rumor has gone around that there are two imposters aboard the Skeld. People barely paid it any mind till the first body was found in the med bay. I hardly knew the lad, only recognized them by their bright orange jumpsuit. Since then I have appreciated the company of Blake.

An alarm rings around the ship as Blake lends a hand in Reactor. We both look around, me more nervous than him. It's when a neutral voice calls for an employee meeting that I settled a bit. Blake and I walk to the cafeteria, meeting with the rest of the crew at the center table. Once we all are seated, Charlie talks.

"Another body has been found between electrical and the engine," Charlie says solemnly. I stiffen at his words, worried above all else that it was so near. "Was anyone near there, did anyone see anything," he asks.

The group murmurs amongst themselves, giving each other alibis and recounts. I look around, thinking to myself that I should speak up. Lifting my arm to speak of my whereabout Blake grabs my wrist.

"Don't," he whispers.

"Don't?" he nods, clenching my hand down to the bench. I curiously look from him to Charlie, conflicted. "Why not," I ask," We were near and if we can bring any information then it's a start in finding the imposter."

"It also puts a big target on your back so just keep quiet unless specifically asked," he snaps through clenched teeth. I gawk at him, not paying a bit of mind to a few crewmates recounting what they were doing while the body was being discovered.

I silently seethe to myself, feeling like a traitor by keeping information to myself. We didn’t see anything, having our backs to the hallway, but telling Charlie that could help figure out which way the imposter could have gone. It's not good to keep such information to yourself at a time like this.

With no details added the meeting is dismissed with everyone more on edge. I quickly depart from the cafeteria, wanting to get away from Blake for now. Marching to my room I don't even notice when the man I wish to avoid is standing at my door. I flop down onto my bed, feeling stressed and anxious.

"You're mad," Blake grunts. I startle, twisting to my side to look at him. He stands tall, unfazed by the announcement of another dead crewmate. His dark grease backed hair is immaculate like usual. The fact that not a single hair is loose seems unfair to the situation.

"Yes," I bark," I'm mad."

"Why," he asks, stepping further into the room.

I gawk at him," why do you think I'm mad? One of our crewmates is dead and you don't want me telling anyone where I was because you think it will put a mark on my back! It shouldn't matter, I didn't kill them but I was close by. I could have been useful."

Blake's lip twitches towards a sneer. His hands leave his pockets in favor of crossing his arms. He looks annoyed, which is better than looking bored. Good, he finally acts like he feels something about all this.

"Did you see anything? Did you hear someone walk by? Truly, do you think you have anything important to say that won't paint you as a potential suspect," he snaps, leaning towards me as he angrily shouts his point. I sit up in bed, throwing my arms up in exasperation.

"No, but i-," I try to explain.

"No," he walks over to the bed," you don't have anything that could have been even remotely useful. Saying nothing was almost the same outcome as saying anything. The only difference is you would have been watched and targeted by the true murderer. It's easy to paint you as the imposter when people are already looking your way and I will not let that happen." he is nearly face to face with me, towering over me easily. His ire is almost enough to silence me. He makes good points but it's not enough for my frustrated self.

"Why should it matter to you if I want to let myself be targeted like that? It's not your job to keep me safe," I stand strong, keeping myself confident in my argument.

"It is my job to keep you safe," he snaps, growling under his breath.

I get up in his face, feeling his breath over my cheeks," Why?"

He stutters," Because- it's cau- I- fuck." his shoulder sag, sighing as he grabs my shoulders. Before I can even blink his lips are on mine. My heart stutters along with my breath, shocking me to my core. I don't have time to react before he is pulling away, the ghost feeling of his warm lips on mine.

Blake opens his mouth to answer, lifting his hands off my shoulder as he struggles to speak. Before he can get too far I panic, reaching out and grabbing his shirt collar. I tug him back, leaning up to kiss him.

It's not magical or special but it feels right. The comfort he gives makes everything disappear as our mouths dance together. I like his warmth, I love his taste. Though my anger dwells in the back of my mind I don't care enough to split. Right now is perfect, even though a true surprise.

The next week is easier to deal with as I have Blake by my side. His ever-present self brings a sort of ease to the chaos around us. The bodies stack up as the killer continues their spree and when the stress becomes too much I can rely on Blake to calm me down.

"This is getting ridiculous," Charlie snaps, running his fingers through his hair for the hundredth time," soon we are going to be outnumbered by theses dickheads, we have to pick someone. Randy, you have had eyes on everything, who do you suspect?"

We all look to Randy," I don't want to be the one pointing fingers here but I have barely seen pinkie here on cams."

Peter gasps, sneering at Randy," So you think I did it just because you don't know where I am every second of the day? How about Lesha? She has been the one to report the body almost every time, seems kind of sus to me."

"Fuck you, Peter," Lesha shouts," don't be pointing that finger at me. I can't help that none of you walk the ship, like, at all."

"Walking the ship and killing people seems like a better waste of your time than fixing the constantly sabotaged O2," Peter barks back.

"Yea, well how about bumblebee over there," she points to Blake and I," those two have been together nonstop, looks like we found our two imposters right there."

"What," I gawk," we have been keeping an eye on one another, doing our tasks. Blake has helped me with so many difficult jobs."

Charlie hums," interesting that you don't seem to understand how to do these simple tasks. The fact that Blake has to basically do them all for you seems rather sus. Clearly, an imposter wouldn't know how to accurately know how to do the jobs us crewmates have been trained for." the group nods, agreeing with his statement. I can only sit back in surprise as everyone turns their gaze to me. My crewmates, people I have worked with for a while, are now turning on me. All of them pointing their fingers to me. What can I do now? I have no alibi or excuse.

I fall to my misfortune, gawking at them all. I have nowhere to run or to escape. These people I have shared so much with is going to shoot me out the nearest airlock without any regret. All I can do is hang my head in defeat.

"She has been with me and hasn't off-ed me," Blake answers casually," clearly if she was the imp then she would have slashed my neck when she had the chance. Believe me, she has had many chances." I don't dare to hope.

The group mutters amongst themselves. It's ultimately Charlie who they all look to, waiting for his final verdict.

Charlie hums in thought, watching me with eagle eyes. "That is very fair. You two have been alone often, it seems like a likely excuse. Our best bet is to keep an eye on her, wait for her to make her move."

The sigh of relief is short-lived as the accusatory eyes lock on me. I think I'll be having a great deal of company this day forward.

In just a few days my ultimate stress has been reached. Every turn I take I'm watched by crewmates, laser focus on my every move. Blake does his best to settle the crew, keeping them at a distance while I work. It's a little relief but I appreciate it all the same. Though walking out of my room every night to someone lounging against the wall nearby brings everything to a head. I will live like this till I'm truly accused or murder by the actual killer.

Blake and I walk to my room, two crewmates following further behind. When we reach my door Blake shoos them away with a promise to watch over me tonight. The two grumble in agreement, marching off.

"Thanks," I mumble, walking into my room.

"hardly something that needs thanks," he grumbles as he follows me in.

We lounge in my bed, looking at my tablet a bit. It's when I'm left staring at the screen for a solid minute that Blake bumps my shoulder.

"You alright," he asks. I chew my cheek, not wanting to reveal the true levels of stress I'm living with.

"As alright as I can be," I shrug. I look back to my tablet, flipping through messages. Blake grabs the tablet from my hands, tossing it aside.

"You can talk to me," he turns on his side," I can't say I'll be much help but I can lend an ear." I turn to him, meeting his charming green eyes. He truly is handsome. I try to tell him that often, adoring the blush that gifts me every time. Though he has bags under his eyes and a rather rude disposition, I treasure his constant presence.

I sigh, closing my eyes," it's hard dealing with all this distrust. Like, I've worked around these people for months. We have joked and laughed together, taught one another. It's depressing."

Blake doesn't answer, making the words linger for a bit. Anxiety bubbles in my chest until I feel him shift closer. He grabs at my hips, turning me towards him. I open my eyes in time to see him lean up and press a kiss to my forehead.

"I'm sorry you have to deal with all this," he mumbles, laying back down against the pillow. Minimal relief floods my chest. He may not have a way with words but he nails the tenderness.

"it's ok, we will figure this out in the end," I reach up and pat his cheek. He turns and kisses my palm, his thumb petting at my hips as he does. I can't help myself, I lunge up to kiss him. He startles when my lips touch his, his fingers clenching my body a bit too tight. Despite his preparedness, he eagerly returns the gesture.

We have made out like a bunch of teenagers before but right now I need more. I crave more from him, greedy as it feels. I pull at his collar, leaning back while guiding him over me. He catches on, pressing his body over mine while sliding his tongue into my mouth. I mew in approval, gripping his shirt to bring him closer.

"Blake," I groan into his mouth. He stiffens, retreating a small distance. I meet his eyes, seeing his confliction. Reaching around I pet at his cheek, softening to his blight. "You alright," I ask," we don't have to do anything you don’t want."

He shakes from his stupor," No, it's just- no, we can keep going."

He falls back into the motions, kissing and licking my lips with more eagerness than before. His hips grind slowly into mine, pressing his hard-on into my crotch. We groan and grope, reaching under the other's shirt. I scratch at his chest while he slowly pets up to my chest.

Before he can touch at my bra I push him up. He goes, stiffening once more in worry. Instead of comforting him, I take off my shirt, tossing it aside with a teasing smile. His eyes dart towards my chest, gulping while his fingers curl near my waist.

Worried, I reach for him," You alright?". His answer is to drop his head and bury his face in my cleavage. "I'll take that as a yes," I laugh. He kisses and nibbles at my boobs, reaching around and unclasping my bra. Leaning back he throws the pesky clothing away, falling back to take a nipple into his mouth. His warm mouth and soothing tongue makes my back arch, pulling a groan from my mouth.

"you like this," he asks, nuzzling his cheek to my boob.

I pet his head," yea, but I think it's your turn now."

He sits up," my turn?"

"yep," I pop the p, fisting his shirt in my hand to give it a tug. He catches on, swiftly pulling off his shirt. I eagerly look him over, admiring his firm chest and light pooch of his stomach. I reach out and trace a finger down his chest towards his pants. Hooking my finger over the waistband I tug, throwing a cheeky eyebrow raised in question.

"You first," he asks, grabbing my waistband. I smile in answer, pulling my feet up as he tugs my jumpsuit bottoms down. After he tosses the bottoms away he swiftly removes my underwear, not paying them a bit of mind as he looks at my crotch with awe. In a trance, he falls to his stomach, tugs at my thighs, and dives in.

"Oh-oh damn," I say shocked at his hunger. His tongue danced over my clit, lapping up my slick with great vigor. I can't help but writhe under his assault, reaching down to grasp his head. I grind into his mouth, almost tormented by his tongue. He lathers my cunt in sweet, sweet attention. It's shocking how quickly he drives me out of my mind. I can hardly believe it.

His tongue soon circles at my entrance, exploring the space timidly. He then shoves his tongue inside me, giving the same vigorous attention. He thrusts and wriggles, bringing me closer and closer to a climax. As I lose myself in bliss I can faintly feel his tongue reach deeper, swelling in girth. I can't bring myself to care as I cry out, nearly ripping his hair from his head as I cum on his face. Choking on my cries of pleasure.

"Blake, oh- stop," I pant, lazily pressing against him. It takes a second for him to catch on, drinking from the new tap. He shoots off, lifting his head sharply.

"Sorry," he grins," was a… tasty experience." his eyes drop back to my crotch, drooling a bit as he gravitates towards me.

"no, no sir," I grab his arm and lift him back over me," I have a different craving than your tongue right now."

"Is that right," he chuckles, leaning in for a kiss.

"oh yeah, you think you can supply me with what I need," I cup his head, kissing him. He hums in answer, awkwardly kicking off his pants. I don't get a chance to say anything before he is resting at my entrance, his tip nudging excitedly. He leans back enough to meet my eyes, asking without words. I nod.

Not looking away he bucks forward, sheathing himself swiftly. We both cry out, startled at the pleasure. His head falls to my shoulder, panting hard. I come back to myself in the meantime, petting at his back. I can feel his body flex, his shoulder twitching and tightening. His chest feels like it swells as his labored breathing ghosts over my chest.

"you alright, dear," I ask, pressing my cheek against his.

"yea," he answers quickly," just- just need a second."

"Take your time," I hug him closer.

He needs longer than a second to reel himself in. slowly his body stops twitching and tightening. Timidly he arches his hips back, bucking forward with a relieved sigh. He repeats, arching back and bucking forward. His tempo is timid but nice. I let him go at his own speed.

Blake holds me snuggly as he slowly fucks me. His cock glides smoothly in and out, squelching lightly each time he goes all in. I find pleasure in his body, listening to his grunts and sighs. I echo him, panting against his shoulder. Though I have to fight against the urge to buck my hips.

"Blake," I sigh, question sitting on the end of my tongue. As I say his name his body stiffens again, his hips stuttering with restrained vigor. It's clear now why he is so apprehensive. I turn to his ear, whispering," let go."

He stops breathing for a moment, his hips freezing as well. Frustration grows in my limbs as I wish for him to keep moving. With a kiss to my cheek, I get what I wish.

Blake's hip draws back almost far enough for him to fall out, slamming forward in a body shaking thrust. I yelp, my nails biting into his shoulders. He draws back again and quickly fills the space he departed. His tempo ups to an amazing degree, plowing into me. Our hips clap as I cry out over his shoulder.

We cry out together, rising in pleasure till we are damn near breaking. I hold him tightly, clenching up as my second orgasm of the night washes over me. He chokes, grunting as he fights through my tightening channel.

Blake is still chasing his finish as I fall back onto the bed, closing my eyes as I ride out my high. I listen to his grunts, pleased above all else.

His hips finally stutter as he cries out. He pumps a few more times till he stills, flooding my insides as he cums. I hum in content. Before I can open my eyes to watch him I hear a loud wet crack. I snap my eyes open looking up to a horrid sight.

"Oh my god," I shake. Blake is perched above me, looking less like himself. His face is cracked down to his neck, his tongue long and extruding from the gap. Sharp teeth line the wet appendage, some teeth visible within the gash. In the darkness behind him, I see an even larger appendage writhing around in the air. Some drool drips off the tip of his tongue, splatting against my sternum. It's enough to shock me into action.

I kick at his thighs, getting his cock out of me while crawling up the bed. As my foot nudges roughly against his thigh he opens his eyes to see my terrified face. With another crack his face rights itself, the gash snapping shut. The appendage behind him slithers back from where ever it came from with a wet snap.

"No," he grabs at me," no, no, it's ok." his tightly clasps my shoulders, pulling me back under him. "It's ok, I won't hurt you," he says panicked. I wiggle in his hold, trying to getaway. I slap at his chest, kick at his legs. He stops this by pinning my body. As I sit tightly in his arms he drops his head to mine, "Please, I won't hurt you. I won't hurt you, you are safe." he rambles these words over and over till I lose my fight.

I fall lack, sighing," Blake?"

"yes, it's me. It's Blake," he tries to smile," I'm me, it's ok."

We both take a moment to calm down, though my heart doesn't catch the message. I manage to convince him to let me go, though it took a lot of promises. It took a moment to find our clothes, putting them on as a reason to put off talking. Soon I'm sitting on the bed and he sits across the room in a chair.

The silence is awkward.

"So," I start," you're not human."

He chuckles without amusement," that's one way to put it."

"Well," I fiddle with my fingers," What are you?"

He sighs," an alien is a good enough term." him actually saying it makes my head hurt. He is an alien, I had sex with an alien. Oh god, I had sex with an alien. I drop my head into my hands with a drawn-out groan.

"This is a mess," I grumble in my hands. It's the truth, where do you go from here. I shake my head in disbelief.

"I'm sorry," Blake says, his chair screeching as he stands," I wanted to tell you but it's hard to just bring that up. Then I thought I could control myself during…well, that."

I scoff," you didn't seem to have control there at the end." I can't help but laugh at that, finding minimal humor in all this.

"Yea," he chuckles," I did not." we laugh a bit together, having a bit of normalcy before we fade off. We sit in silence once more. My brain races as thoughts creep back in. something clicks as I look to him.

"You're the imposter," I startle back," you killed those people, oh my god." I scramble back away from him, hitting my back against the wall. He panics, walking over to me with raised hands.

"No, I didn't do that. Yea, I'm the imposter everyone is hunting but I'm not like the other one. I couldn't even get the guts to kill you, how can i-," he freezes, straightening with tense shoulders.

"What," I curl up," you- you tried to kill me?"

"No," he answers quickly," well, yes, but I couldn't do it. You were so nice and peppy, too lovely to kill."

"Too lovely to kill? So if I was mean then I would be one of the dead launched out the airlock," I scoff," why should that be so special? Were you just trying to get in my pants or something? How can you expect me to believe any of this, this is outrageous."

"Don't accuse me of something I never did. I like you, plain and simple. Sure, if situations were different then maybe we wouldn't be here but we are now. You humans always ask 'what if' but don't settle with what is happening now. I'm sorry for not telling you, that will stay with me for a long time, but it's out now. So all I can say now is that I will keep you safe and I will never hurt you."

His outburst lingers in the air for a bit. His promise is heartwarming. Looking at him now I can nearly feel his sincerity. It's easy to believe him, though doubt wishes to taint it. I watch him for a moment, trying to fight for my ire. It's a losing battle. I sigh, dropping my head as I know I will forgive him. God, I hope this won't go wrong.

Blake and I become closer than ever as the crew searches far and wide for the true murderer. Blake swears up and down he has barely a clue on who the other person is, just having a faint idea. He keeps his suspicions to himself though, telling me that I have a bad poker face. Which… is true.

One night closes to an end with Blake walking me back to my room. We pass by electrical, hearing a strange noise. Sneaking inside we catch a glimpse of someone jumping out of the vent below. Swiftly Blake grabs me and runs out the room, whispering to me that the imposter dwells within the room. We shuffle out, hiding around by storage as the footsteps echo closer.

"Got to play casual," Blake suggests.

"How do we do that," I silently yell. As the steps near Blake grabs my shoulders, forces me against a storage bin, and kisses me. I catch on quickly, cupping the back of his head and hiking a leg over his hip. We listen closely to the steps, ready for the confrontation.

"I believe you two have a room for this kind of thing," a man calls from behind Blake. I pretend to startle away from Blake, laughing as I look over his shoulder.

"Sorry Charlie," I giggle," we got a little sidetracked."

"Yea, sorry Charlie," Blake mumbles as he sets me down, keeping himself between Charlie and me.

"Eh, all's well. Just head back to your room, it's late," he smiles kindly.

We depart from him, nodding as we pass. Our rush to my room is tense, listening for anyone following until we reach the sanctuary of my room.

A body is found that same night, a meeting taking place early the next morning. As we sit at the table Blake and I share a look as Charlie asks the group if they have any suspicions. Blake speaks first.

------------------

I wrote this strictly for the sex part. Everything else after that meant nothing to me. Also the guy taking control of the situation should always be sus. No one wants to be the leader in an Among us game unless they are the imp.

Didn’t like this one either, but i did have fun with the sex. cause i’m a thot.

Check out my Archive | Masterlist | Main Blog

#among us #monster boyfriend #cyan is sus #comfort #fear #exophilia #Enigma-IM #i highkey adore among us #two imps

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writersplight · 3 years ago

Text

A COMPARISON

AN: I feel I should include a content warning of some kind. There's nothing explicitly done wrong or said, but there is this hint at past bad sex experiences, and well as vague sex talk. ——— When Erwin talks, even if it’s directed at her, his words are chosen precisely. He could be talking to anyone really, and his words float through her like she’s air. It was never full conversations, just words floating from his mouth to her ears, with flat responses. There are hidden messages behind his words, and it takes learning how to decipher him to figure it out. Yet, they are forced and hollow. When Onyankopon talks, it's engaging. He’s fully listening to whatever she has to say, even if it’s nonsense, with questions and the perfect amount of eye contact. In return, she listens to all his facts about airplanes and zeppelins he has to offer. How can she not? His smile is so warm and inviting, she can’t help but sit down with a kettle of tea and hear him explain the mechanics of it all.

When Erwin would touch her, it would be quick, with specific purpose, and fleeting. Even when there were no meetings, no eyes on them except for the moon—completely devoid of life and love. It had to be initiated by him, whenever it was convenient for him. She’d be putty in his hands, though, soaking up every second. It was rare he had any semblance of “vulnerability” with her. Every touch was over way too soon, leaving her with an emptiness to deal with. She always pushed it down, making excuse after excuse for him. With Onyankopon, he listens. His touches are experimental, and he never does anything without asking. The first time they slept together, he reassured her that she wasn’t there for a quick, meaningless fuck. He just thought they should share a bed—he made some comment about how Ena mentioned cuddling earlier in the evening, but she refuses to acknowledge that as her full offer. That isn’t to mention the first time they had sex. She didn’t know the bedroom could be so. . . Satisfying. She was brought up on the idea that her life should be dedicated to pleasing a man in one way or another. The idea of actually living outside of that is a concept she only dreamt of when she ran away from home at the naive age of seventeen. Now, at almost thirty-nine years old, she’s faced with what she wants. And Ena’s never been so confused. At this point, her life is so much different than it was when she joined the Survey Corps at twenty-one. She had options beyond “kill the enemy and live another day”. Beyond “constantly prove how worthy you are”. Everything she wanted, and yet everything was so confusing. She kept expecting Onyankopon to snap and become impatient with her, or to up and leave altogether. But he didn’t. And he hasn’t. There’s no ultimatum with him. It’s always a fair and just compromise. At this point, laying awake at night, listening to him breathing, she realized how unfair it was to compare Erwin to Onyankopon. No one could compare to the openness he willingly shares with Ena. He’ll talk with her for hours about feelings and coping mechanisms, and if he does manage to step over a boundary, he sets time aside to fully hear her side, and to apologize. Rolling onto her side, Ena remembers the first time she initiated that she wanted to have sex with Onyankopon. She was really nervous “taking the lead”, but he was into it. He’s a hell of a listener, that’s for sure. It was a new territory for her, and he was always asking questions and for consent. There was a moment when she became hyper-aware of her surroundings, causing her to become still. That familiar stillness, the lifeless corpse of herself that was waiting for life to be pumped into it. She hated it. Suddenly, the pleasure was stimulating in all the wrong ways, and there was too much air in her lungs and not enough. “Is this—” “God, please stop!” His movements stopped immediately, concerned. She’s never shouted like that. She was never shaking like that. Or still. He pulls out, and gives her space. When Ena sits up, the room seems to turn with her in the middle. She didn’t know when Onyankopon left, or how the water got in her hands, or why she was crying so hard. She didn’t do anything wrong, but she held the guilt of every quiet woman in her bloodline. Onyankopon didn’t do anything wrong, but he did feel bad for not noticing sooner. Like most things in her life, her symptoms were quiet. They crept up on her, and she didn’t blame him. He put an arm under her, with permission, to help her sit up. He put a blanket around her. “I’m sorry, I don’t know what came over me,” she whispers, wiping her eyes with a handkerchief that was handed to her. “Did I hurt you in any way?” “What? Of course not! You’re so good to me, and you know what you're doing, I just—” Ena pauses, and her eyes drop to her hands because telling Onyankopon about her previous relationship was always so hard. She always felt bad for wanting better, due to the circumstances she was faced with before on the island. She made sure to clarify Erwin never

intentionally hurt her, and meant his best. Even still, he would focus on his own pleasure, and believe that if he was feeling good, so was Ena. Not true, but she restated that he didn't know, and she couldn't help because she didn't know how to please herself. Onyankopon nodded along, sipping his own glass of water. He didn't villainize her past "boyfriend"—in quotes because they were together, but they weren't able to slap an official label on it. Even still, he had to wonder why she put up with him for so long. “I don’t know why,” she admits quietly, and he realized he asked that out loud. He began to apologize, but she assured him there was no need. After all, she was beginning to wonder about herself. “I used to say ‘because I love him’, right? But now that I have freedom right now. . . I’m sure it was a form of love, but it’s nothing like what we have. I just feel bad for constantly bringing him up, Onyankopon. He’s just the only frame of reference I have.” “And maybe an unintentional source of trauma?” he wondered, and Ena shrugged. She knew that was right, but it was a lot to admit. She didn’t want to admit that about her dead boyfriend. “It seems to me that he’s the reason you’re hesitant all the time. I don’t mind it, you're open to talking through your problems, but I’m concerned as to why he’s still got a death grip on your decisions. . . No pun intended, I promise!” He sees how her face twists up with this visible guilt. He puts a hand on her thigh. “I could be in the wrong, it’s okay to tell me that—” “I know, but I don’t think you’re wrong. But I don’t want to complain about the life I had in Paradis. It feels. . . Wrong,” she finally looks back at him. Even in a moment like this, he was so goddamn pretty. “You can still love someone even though they’ve traumatized you. It’s nuanced, Ena. For a situation as complicated as yours, there will always be nuance.” He explains. “Yeah?” she turns to face her lover with a nervous smile. “So you’re not upset with me that I yelled at you to stop?” “Of course not! I could never be mad at that. I’m sorry I didn’t notice sooner.” She didn’t hold him in contempt, and told him that. She was just overstimulated in all the wrong ways. It happens sometimes. When he suggested relaxing for the rest of the night, she agreed. It started with a shower, where Onyankopon cleaned her hair so nicely. She used her lavender soap that he buys for her to wash his body, loving the idea that he’ll smell like her when he’s out and about in the morning getting groceries. Then he brewed some fancy tea blend bought from Levi’s shop, and they read some book Armin Arlert published, with in depth illustrations and diagrams by Jean Kirschtein. They go on explorations of other countries, studying various plant life and bugs. Weird, considering the ocean is bigger and far more interesting, but it was a good read nonetheless. And Ena totally didn’t slip and nearly cracked her head open when she stepped out of the shower. Nope. Onyankopon catching her and holding her close was merely him showing affection, and not caused by her slipping. It totally was, she’s just embarrassed. Months later, now, she rolls over to face him. He’s so sweet and patient with her. Not to say she isn’t patient with him, it’s just the first time that it isn’t stressful. Ena almost feels like she doesn’t deserve him. He understands her in a way that she’s never known—not to mention he can cook, clean, and understands that sometimes people just want alone time. Oh, and he loves taste-testing her experimental meals. As well as taking her flying on whatever complicatedly named airship he loves. And the way they pick each other’s brains. . . It’s sort of unfair to compare Erwin Smith to her current boyfriend. She can’t help it, she was raised in a society where comparing one another was supposed to be inspiration. Ena never felt inspired by having her hair, her eyes, her nose, her body, or her strength compared to someone else. It felt like an insult above all else. She knew, however, that Erwin liked

that challenge of trying to “best” someone, and that probably hasn’t changed since he died. Ena was okay with that.

#fanfic writeblr #aot #attack on titan #shingeki no kyoujin #snk #enawin #erwin smith #onyankopon #oc: p. ena bristol #enakopon #writeblr #my works.mp3

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sugamoonv · 5 years ago

Text

Eighth Member of BTS

Word Count: 3k

Warnings: None, kinda angsty at first maybe??

Notes: This is kind of implied male reader as BigHit only deals with boy groups but I don’t think I used any pronouns so it should be safe for all genders to read

A.N: I’m back!!! I kind of, maybe, went off a little on this so I’m most likely going to make another part to this. If you guys would rather have it be Poly!BTS or delve in specific members, let me know! Love you!!

You’ve been training with BigHit for a little over a year

You joined BigHit after they held international auditions and you miraculously made it through all rounds

Moving into the dorms and taking classes/lessons was a huge change from your typical school work/ job

The time you usually gave for school/work drastically decreased so you find yourself constantly busy

Your social life basically reduces to interacting with the others in your dorm and talking to your outside friends when you finally have the time

Being a trainee is stressful and the dorms you and the other trainees live in are small since people are constantly coming and going

Depending on who you are, you either become comfortable expressing your emotions when having a difficult day, or you wait until everyone is asleep or find places you can get a semblance of privacy

You also have to become comfortable and seeing your roommates handle things

You usually have class in the afternoon and come back to the dorm to change and go to dance lesson and on one particular day, you walked in on your roommate sobbing to his parents over the phone because their voice kept cracking during vocal lessons

Trainee lessons take up the majority of the day so you have to reserve the time between you’re finished and when you fall asleep for assignments/outside studying

This time is usually between 1 and 3 a.m, so constant sleep deprivation becomes normal for you

You become a master at taking naps anywhere and at any time of the day possible

Sleep deprivation doesn’t help anyone manage stress in a healthy way and this has lead to your roommates repeatedly getting into serious arguments over boundaries and personal space

Being one of the older members amongst the trainees, this means that you’re called upon a lot to help settle disputes

So when BigHit tells you that you’re debuting, you couldn’t be happier to move on

You’re a little curious as to why BigHit is flying you to Korea before they tell you who the other members in your group are but you’ve learned not to question them

Perhaps the other members in your group are the trainees that live in Korea

By now, BTS is BigHit’s top group and has been debuted for a couple years now and has amassed a large fanbase

After working so hard, BigHit finally gave the members of BTS a couple months off

Though they noticed that after the first month and a half, BTS lost a bit of their momentum

They were still one of the largest performers in the world, but with them being on break and not releasing any music, dances, or videos, media somewhat lost interest and focused their attention on relevant celebrity news

To surpass this and keep BTS’s name trending, they made the executive decision to add another member

BigHit figured this would allow them to do more concepts, would change the dynamic/sound of the group's songs, and would ensure fans came back for their next debute to see who the next member was

BTS was made aware of this change but since they’re about to go on vacation, they don’t put much thought into it at first

Until Namjoon texts the group, because you start trending number one on twitter with BTS after the announcement and of course Namjoon, is on social media

Of course, your actual identity isn't revealed to the public

They all message their managers to ask about who you are

Yoongi stalks all of your social media when they’re given your basic information

Jimin finds your Instagram and he lowkey thinks you’re cute but he’s not about to admit that

Jungkook and Taehyung talk mad shit about you at first, to be honest

Well, they don’t specifically talk about you, they’re more so angry at you being added because, in their eyes, there’s no need for a new member

Hoseok begins stressing day one because he doesn’t know how much you’ve been taught about their dances

He’s not really looking forward to the idea of having to teach a new person literally all of BTS’s past dances and work on changing the formations so you fit in

Namjoon and Yoongi are curious as to how BigHit is going to fit you during performances since you would only have parts in recent songs

Also being the main producers of the group, Namjoon, Yoongi, and Hoseok don’t know what you sound like, whether you’ll be added to the rap or vocal line

It's basically a whole mess and everyone has to reconfigure

While BTS is on vacation, you’re actually in Korea learning the dances, in the recording studio, and practicing Korean nonstop

The first time BTS meets you is when they go to the dance studio to learn the new dance for their comeback song

You don’t know the dance either so figuratively, you’re all starting in the same place

You choke up when they first walk in

Namjoon and Jin are respectful to you, knowing that this was BigHit’s decision and they have no reason to hold a grudge against you specifically

Hoseok and Jimin remain professional but you can sense how much you being there stresses them out

Taehyung tries to be civil but you repeatedly catch him giving you dirty looks and rolling his eyes whenever you speak

Jungkook straight up ignores you

Not gonna lie, you’re first day meeting them goes awful

But you already signed a contract with BigHit and your name was put out since BTS was officially back from vacation so no backing out now

It gets lonely real fast

You’re in a new country, the members of your group already have years of bonding over you, and the apartment you’re placed in is gigantic and extremely quiet compared to the dorms back in your home country

The members ease up a little after hearing and seeing you sing and dance and knowing that you can hold your own

Particularly Hoseok and Jimin, once they see you can keep up with them for the most part, they no longer worry about having to take time out of their day to specifically help you

Though this may also be a curse because Hoseok has a bit of a tendency to be harder upon his fellow members with choreography

You get called out/corrected by him SEVERAL times during practice

It isn’t until a couple weeks in when things start looking up for you

Yoongi had for the most part just focused on what needed to be done for the comeback, worrying about producing and perfecting the choreo himself, so he doesn’t really pay much attention to you

Until Yoongi notices it’s starting to become a pattern where you eat by yourself at one end of the room and he and the other members eat together or pair off

He’s pretty sure there have been a couple nights where you’ve pretended you weren’t hungry or made an excuse to eat alone when Jin or Namjoon politely invite you to eat

Jimin has noticed this too and has lightened up since the first day meeting you, but still keeps his distance

After an already long day working, waking up at 4am, Yoongi specifically makes sure that you can’t escape eating lunch with them

Most of them are too hungry to even try to object, not that they really would as you’ve spent enough time with them that they’re all starting to warm up to you

Jungkook and Taehyung don’t give you looks as much but they’re still not their boisterous selves when you’re around

Hoseok and Jin are in their own world with their own conversation with Namjoon occasionally adding input when taking small breaks from his phone

Yoongi’s the one that really talks to you while you’re all eating

Jimin is honestly a sweetheart so when he sees Yoongi actually asking about your life, he feels guilty and joins in on the conversation

Yoongi finds that you and him actually have quite a few things to bond over

Jimin’s surprised at how funny you actually are

Once you got comfortable in the conversation, you said a few jokes here and there that made Jimin and whoever else listening at least smiles

Neither Jimin or Jungkook are thrilled at how easy is it for you to make Jimin laugh but the blush on Jimin’s cheeks show he doesn’t care about it nearly as much as Jungkook

If anything, this means more competition for Jungkook as you’re already close in age so he might lose the spot of maknae and now he has one more person to fight for attention with

Namjoon and Jin are honestly the most mature ones in the group so they’ve let go of any grudges they had after the first few days upon meeting you

Namjoon’s happy getting to know you at the pace you’re comfortable at, though for the most part, seeing he has to worry less about how to cover up the tension between you and everyone else, lifts a huge weight off his shoulders

He can make an excuse as to why Jungkook or Taehyung may be quiet and trusts them to not actually let their personal feelings ruin an interview/performance

You find out two months into preparing for the comeback that you’re still not allowed in group photos with everyone

You and the other members are doing a small, unannounced appearance and at the end, took a photo with the interviewer/crew members

That is until your manager pulls you from the photo and keeps you to the side where the camera can’t see you

Your name may have been announced but BigHit wants to keep your identity secret for the most part until the comeback stage

Taehyung can’t help but be drawn back to when he was kept hidden as a secret member and recalls exactly how it felt when he was pulled from photos

With this, Taehyung realizes that you haven’t put out any videos/vlives since joining them even though they all have

This is the final push it takes for Taehyung’s behavior to change towards you

Instead of sticking with Jungkook, he actually starts seeking you out when you guys have small breaks and joins you and whoever else during meals

At this point, you’re already on a good basis with everyone else and are closest to Yoongi, Jimin, and oddly Hoseok

Hoseok sort of took you under his wing when one night, you asked him for help with the choreo and eventually delved into how you loved dancing as a child

Hoseok thought it was cute the way your eyes lit on when talking about it and saw a bit of himself in you

On one of the rougher days, Taehyung overhears you crying after repeatedly being barred from photos/appearances with the other members

Taehyung becomes extremely determined from that day to offer unconditional emotional support

Whenever you’re alone, if no one joins you, Taehyung’s right there by your side

If one of the instructors/producers/managers is harsh with you, Taehyung is there to defend you or make you feel better after

If you’re not allowed to take a photo/video with them, Taehyung makes them ten after to store for when you are officially introduced to ARMY

Jungkook only warms up to you after seeing the other members get close to you

He didn’t tell anyone, but he’s secretly happy that there’s another member that’s the same age as him

Because honestly, having to constantly live up to the name Golden Maknae, is a lot of pressure

He hopes that with you being there, Army may stop expecting so much of him and he’ll have more room to simply be a person in their 20’s

Only when Jungkook gives you a chance, does he find that you can match his chaotic energy

He invites you to the gym a couple times and ends up having fun

Jungkook also invites himself to your’s and Jin’s mukbangs

Jin began having mukbangs specifically for you because you told him how little food you had tried that he had grown up with and took on as a personal mission to introduce to you Korean cuisine

With you, Jin, and Jungkook all in the same room, things sometimes get out of hand and sometimes noodles may or may not be thrown

Jungkook also discovers that he immensely enjoys picking you up

(Because let's be honest, you probably have a muscle kink like Jimin, at least when it comes to Jungkook)

Namjoon finds it hilarious that Jungkook will just pick you up and walk off with you

Jimin gets a little jealous but he can’t stay mad at you and Jungkook easily finds a balance between you two

Jin’s just happy that Jungkook leaves him alone now that he’s focused on you

On top of being randomly carried around, you also find that the members have practically no personal boundaries with each other

Sure, if someone is upset or wants to be alone, they’re left alone, but when all in one room, your body is fair game to everyone

There’s a lot more ass slapping then you expected to come along with debuting

Ass slapping, ass grabbing, ass petting?????

And you weirdly learn that everyone is okay with their crotches being touched/touching others’ crotches

Especially Hoseok and Jungkook

You’re no longer lonely either because someone is always cuddling with you

You walk past Jungkook or Taehyung while they’re sitting and they pull you onto to their lap

Jimin will help you stretch and if you’re not required to rehearse, just stays there

Namjoon, Hoseok, and Jin aren’t as openly needy as the hyung line, but if you all have to fit onto a small couch, they’re more than happy to have you be on their lap or be sitting in very close quarters with you

Yoongi is the one you thought that didn’t actually like cuddling for some time but he never objects when you wrap your arms around his waist, hug him, or literally crawl on top of him when he’s trying to nap

You even one day as a joke, crawled into Yoongi’s lap while he was working in his studio so that you were chest to chest and you had your legs wrapped around him and he simply kept on working

You stayed in that position for so long and Yoongi becomes extremely quiet when focused that you dozed in and out for some time

When Yoongi decided to call it a night, he had to wake you up and you were incredibly sleepy at that point so he just brought you to his apartment since it was closer and safer than you traveling back to yours alone

Newsflash: Yoongi becomes an incredibly big cuddler when unconscious

By the time you perform your comeback stage, BTS is incredibly whipped for you

Army first makes you number one on trending news when the music video/dance videos are released and you have a few performances

They all can’t help but notice how much the members of BTS love you in the first big interviews aired

You become integrated into Army culture seemingly overnight

Namjoon will show you memes on twitter where a fan may be calling out how handsy Jungkook was with you last interview

Or memes of Namjoon or Hoseok getting angry at members but when you do something, they’ll automatically let you off the hook and coddle you

Memes of how you’re just another hot person that Jimin’s collected

You’re shocked that so many fans actually like you and accept you because you were incredibly nervous that you would become hated for joining the group

Of course, there are still fans that are extremely protective of the boys or simply don’t agree with the group dynamic being changed, and so they come after you

For a little while, BigHit has to up security because some fans are so put off that they actually write you death threats

Hoseok and Jimin are the first ones to help you when you have a panic attack or get overwhelmed by fan presence as Hoseok has had panic attacks and Jimin’s dealt with death threats as well

Taehyung, of course, is quick to help right after them

Taehyung and Jungkook have had bad experiences being chased/mobbed by fans so they always stay close by you in airports/entering buildings/and any other place that attracts large enough groups they need security

Namjoon is incredibly grateful for you joining though, especially after the comeback because you’re able to help with translations for the members that still struggle with English

Jungkook has been dedicating to learning the language and for the most part, doesn’t need your help but he’ll still come to you to practice having conversations in English

Jimin also likes to play this fun game with you, Namjoon, and technically Jungkook since he’s able to translate if he wants, where he’ll say extremely flirty things and watches you and Namjoon squirm for a couple minutes because he knows you can’t translate what he actually said in an interview

Luckily he only does this for interviews that aren’t aired on tv and are made easily rewindable by Army

Yoongi and Hoseok have a field day with Jimin’s game too

Yoongi and Hoseok will just laugh when Jimin says something but once all cameras are off, they’ll repeat Jimin’s pick up lines to you and Namjoon leaving both of you a blushing mess

Yoongi does the same thing too in a way but instead of flirting, he’ll just say something inappropriate

He tries to tell younger Army constantly that things like stealing and dropping out of school are okay

Which huge ass nerd Namjoon quickly cuts him off

Yoongi and Jimin honestly feed into each other while doing this

Sometimes you and Jungkook team up on teasing Hoseok, using complicated English words and laughing when Hoseok pretends to know what you guys are saying even though everyone knows he doesn’t

Y’all will continue to do this until someone else calls Hoseok out

But it's all in good fun so no one actually gets upset

Overall, you being added to BTS went much better than you were expecting and you’ve grown so close to the boys that none of you can no longer imagine the group having any less than eight members

Permanent Tag List: @eshika0102 / @detectivebourbon / @omgsuperstarg / @luna-xial / @strawberry-leche / @yoongiismytruelove

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whetstonefires · 5 years ago

Note

Do you think the DC fandom maybe, Infantilizes Tim a little too much? Like for a rich kid character who's main trauma for a long time was a getting left home alone too much there's an oddly amount of meta abt how much how much his parents hurt him~ compared to, y'know the two poor characters who grew up with physically abusive dad's+druggie mom's, or the two that were raised assassin cult's, etc

…well, yeah, I do kind of think that? His whole schtick for so long was being too old for his age in ways that didn’t sacrifice his jokey, relatable teenager energies. It’s weird how little of that we see anymore, sometimes.

And then DC broke him and discarded him and he’s sort of awkwardly hanging around getting reimagined as more woobie with every fan generation. It is weird!

But tbh I do get it. And I think the reason his parents’ failure of him and his vulnerability get played up so much, and Jason and Steph’s sufferings (while used a lot for things like motivation and context) not dwelt on quite so much in the same lugubrious style, are kind of the same reason.

Which is that canon didn’t commit to it. Jason and Steph’s experiences with bad parenting were foregrounded and retconned more dramatically awful several times. (There’s some definite classism in how that was approached imo, and I’m never budging on being mad about DC retconning out Catherine being sick and then ignoring her forever in all Jason characterization because a drug death invalidates a person ig, great message during the opioid crisis guys.)

They engaged and coped with it–Steph (and Cass, our #1 canon batfam parental abuse victim) pretty directly, Jason a little less so because of the dubious and fluctuating canon status of most of the content more specific than ‘poverty, homelessness, theft, parental drugs and crime in there somewhere,’ so most of his parent issues have been focused on Bruce. He sure has dug into them tho. 😂 Rarely well or productively, thanks DC, but it’s explicitly part of his character, is my point.

Whereas upper-middle-class Tim was always treated by the narrative as fortunate and unharmed by his experiences with his parents. Even though they were clearly behaving badly in several ways, and Tim showed signs of being harmed by it.

Tim outside of immediate moments of frustration always was of the opinion he was Fine, and Very Fortunate Actually.

Therefore a huge chunk of the numerous everyone who’s got parent-related mental and emotional harm, but has struggled to have that validated and hasn’t responded with a lot of anger toward the parent, identifies with Tim. The only one who’s never really lashed out at his parents for fucking up with him. The one who still needs it explored, because canon ultimately didn’t.

[editing post to put in a readmore because lol it’s long, post otherwise unchanged]

(Dick obviously didn’t ever have any Issues with the Graysons, but he Angry Teenagered at Bruce so hard it changed Bruce’s characterization permanently, rip.)

The things Jason, Steph, and Cass have been through are dramatic, obvious, and fit stereotypes because that’s what they’re based on.

That’s important content to have, but because it’s right out there in your face even people who identify with it quite a lot are less likely to feel the need to work all the way through it again in fanworks. That part’s there. It’s text.

(Well actually Jason having been physically abused kind of wasn’t? I think? It was mostly assumed on the basis of stereotyping and Jason’s not caring about the man much even as he felt possessive of information about his death, which is valid. I don’t actually know what’s up with Willis now, Lobdell did some weird shit that lacked emotional resonance or staying power because he’s Lobdell and has no soul.

Cass’ wandering years are also ludicrously underdeveloped. But very very few comics fans or writers can personally relate to being amazing child warriors with no grasp of language living feral under bridges. That part of her life is consistently represented in terms of absences, in terms of its deviation from the norm and the deficits of normality it left her with, which is typical but unfortunate.)

The interesting things to do with these characters are often informed by the bad stuff in their childhoods, but there’s relatively rarely that much more to say about the fact that those things were bad. They know they’re bad. They’ve had a lot of on-panel rage about it, as discussed above. Steph and Cass both beat the shit out of their dads.

Jason is, in fandom especially, a sort of Platonic ideal of a kid who’s mad about his bad childhood and really bad at figuring out where to point that rage.

(Damian is a whole other kettle of fish, because he’s been lumbered by so many detailed retcons coming so fast no two people can seem to construct compatible models of what his early childhood was like, and even more because he’s still ‘a child’ enough that he’s necessarily in a different stage of processing than someone who’s officially only a few years older than him at this point, but still functionally 8 and also 20 years older, and whose parents are no longer in the picture to continue screwing up.

Also there’s no question that if he brings up an abusive thing the League did, he will be validated by his current environment about his realization that it was in fact bad. There’s a lot of fic on that theme! But it doesn’t have the same tone precisely because it is usually understood that that support will be there if he wants it. Realizing that his previous context contained things that were wrong keeps being made the focus of his arc.)

The badness of Tim’s childhood, on the other hand, was mainly in subtext. Even when we were clearly meant to understand Jack was fucking up, like when he canceled plans with Tim at the last minute to go on a date with Tim’s stepmother, or that infamous time he came to apologize for not being a great parent and got mad Tim was distracted by a crisis on TV so he flew into a rage and took the TV and smashed it and was like ‘that’ll teach you,’ it wasn’t leaned into.

The story didn’t treat Jack as a minor villain to be overcome but like a sort of environmental hazard of childhood, like homework, to be endured and coped with. Tim said things like ‘it’s fine’ and ‘at least he left the computer.’

(And like. It’s not about having a TV and computer in his room. It’s about not letting a child have boundaries, pointedly not respecting a child’s possessions, creating an emotionally insecure environment, punishing minor infractions in proportion to their momentary impact on your own ego, physically lashing out at a proxy for the child…)

Rather like Tom King later didn’t understand about the punching from Bruce, whoever did that story (probably Dixon? I don’t care enough to check) did not understand how serious a case of bad parenting that scene was. That is most definitely textbook abusive behavior. (It’s a hell of a lot more common abusive behavior than being a lame supervillain or shooting you when you screw up, and a lot more specific than ‘was a thug, might have hit me, dead now.’)

And Tim was never allowed to be mad at his parents about it. It was fine. He needed to be ignored so he had the freedom to be Robin. He deserved his dad being mad at him because he was keeping secrets. He complained too much, although objectively he did not.

The universe punished him for ‘complaining,’ more than once. We cut straight from him shunting aside his disappointment that his postcard from his parents was just to say they weren’t coming home yet after all with ‘if it will stop all the fights they’ve been having lately it’s more than fine’ to them getting kidnapped.

He agreed not to come on the rescue mission. His mom never made it home, and his dad was in a coma for a while. And then ultimately Jack died as a result of Tim’s decision to be Robin, immediately after finally deciding to accept it.

So Tim walks around feeling a huge burden of responsibility for his parents’ deaths, and completely unable to process any hurt they did him as real or valid, especially in comparison with the far more blatant awfulness other people have been through, and canon is clearly never going to address it. Or even acknowledge it properly.

Let me repeat that because it’s kind of my main point:

People are fixated on getting Tim’s emotional abuse validated because that’s an incredibly important step in recovering from emotional abuse, and it’s one canon consistently denied him.

How ‘bad’ things are ‘in comparison to’ problems other people have is a bad and unhealthy way to engage with trauma. Okay? That’s just a really harmful framework to apply to pain.

It’s also a way that both Tim and people with experiences similar to Tim’s are encouraged to engage with their own experiences, compounding the existing problems.

So. Not a form of relatable DC was ever actually aiming for when they tried so hard (and pretty effectively) to make him a relatable character as Robin, but an enduring one for a lot of fans.

So Tim’s childhood is a natural target for fanworks in a different way than the traumas that have been made explicit and taken seriously by the text. And then a lot of that got compounded by the way the introduction of Damian as Robin was handled, and the lack of resolution that got. And his current status as not quite having a place in the family anymore.

So between the level of projection encouraged by that context and how relatively difficult to access Tim’s Robin run has become ten years after the fact, this has led to a lot of fanworks on these themes that are based mostly on other fanworks, and stray further and further from the original content.

So at this point there’s an entire wing of Tim’s fandom wherein this side of him has expanded enormously, and he primarily exists to suffer, frequently in ways that 1) escalate to a point that is inarguably ‘valid’ and hard to dismiss and 2) set him up to rebound from it in whatever way the writer finds emotionally satisfying or useful–being ultimately cared for and reassured by people who value him (the most infantilizing option but like, popular for obvious reasons), or unveiling his brilliant scheme that was causing him to pretend to be passive in the face of mistreatment, or turning around and using his genius ninja skills to wrest power back from his abusers, or just laying down some sick burns about being treated fairly.

But not that many of the last one, because that’s mostly done with other batfam members.

Tim’s become a vehicle for a lot of vicarious coping that Steph and Jason just aren’t appropriate for, because they get angry and they get even. And those are stories that exist already, so there’s less scope for telling your own.

And because Jason’s reaction pattern is ultimately so masculine (i’ll make them all sorry! with my guns! blam blam!) while Tim’s is pretty gender-neutral, the demographics of fanfic mean that the bulk of the people using Tim vicariously in this manner are female-aligned, which has over time feminized this archetype of him a lot. Sometimes in ways I find really uncomfortable, like there’s a lot of forced pregnancy stuff which activates my panic buttons. x.x

But, ultimately, it’s fandom. People are going to do what they’re going to do, DC in their perpetual fail has hung Tim out to dry in narrative terms, and I’d rather the people who are using Tim for victimization narratives over the people who can’t dismiss or discredit him fast enough now that his position has been filled. 🤷‍♀️ What we gonna do? Fave’s in an awkward spot. DC hates us. This is the life in this comic book pit. XD

Also if you’re the same anon who left me a callout about op of that weird Steph post in my inbox, or if you aren’t @ that person, 1) I refuse to get involved so I’m not answering that ask 2) those aren’t even particularly dramatic fandom crimes? That’s pretty normal? That’s just…Caring Too Much About Ships And Disagreeing With Me.

Do I also feel those opinions are kinda bad? Yeah. But I disagree with everyone about something. Chill.

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thewhitefluffyhat · 5 years ago

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No, Alina Isn’t Crazy

Let me explain...

When Alina was first introduced, I thought she was the character that made the least sense as an actual person rather than as a trope-y “mad artist” archetype. But after the reveal of her backstory, I find her personality and motivations do make sense, especially when you consider the events of Alina’s Magical Girl Story from her perspective.

Indeed, since that story’s release on JP, she’s quickly risen to become my favorite new character from Magia Record. Hence why I’m posting this today - it’s another semi-Magia Rapport related post, haha. Alina is definitely my favorite of the Forest element characters, and perhaps this essay will show a little of why that is.

Provocative title and Magia Rapport aside, though, what’s actually below the "Keep reading” is a close read analysis essay, specifically focused on Alina’s MGS. (A lot of Holy Alina’s MGS serves to confirm and reinforce little points scattered throughout this too, but this post was long enough without it!)

Introduction

The theme of Alina’s own art might be “Alina’s beauty” and “life, death, and emotion/decay.” But I would argue that the theme of her MGS as a when taken as a short story is “voyeurism and objectification at the cost of self-identity.” Specifically, how Alina’s actions and personality are the logical conclusion to that concept taken to an extreme.

There’s one important truth to Alina’s world, and that is the idea that Alina’s art IS Alina. We see it at the start – when she says her art is what she enjoys and what she grasps with her own hands. We see it at the end – with her realization that her art’s theme is “Alina’s beauty.”

And at the end of the day, what MGS Alina most seems to want is to be left alone to do art, to be herself. But who is Alina?

Alina the Teen Prodigy

Unfortunately for Alina, her fame gets in the way of figuring that out. Such is the life of a teen prodigy. As perhaps can be expected, constantly parading children under a spotlight is a great recipe for turning out extremely high-strung kids with very warped self-esteem.

(See also: Nemu, but especially Touka.)

The exchange regarding the award here is a good illustration of that mindset. It might initially seem contradictory for Alina to work desperately hard to win an award that she later doesn’t want and claims she wasn’t aiming to win. But once being “gifted” becomes central to your identity, winning an award doesn’t feel good anymore. It feels more like running in place, just the bare minimum expected of you to maintain your identity as a genius. And Alina’s perfectionism means she can’t not hold herself to that standard.

Indeed, Alina is already showing signs that she’s struggling under the pressure and overexposure. Normally, Alina seems to love talking about art and her own works (as long as it isn’t about herself, anyway). Arguing with her teacher and running away are far more of a bother and interfere with her ability to get back to painting far more than a quick meeting would have been. Yet she curses at her teacher, bolts, and skips school rather than have to deal with the consequences of her fame again.

She’s irrationally lashing out, asserting her boundaries in whatever way she can. And with the way the characters react, this doesn’t even seem like the first time it’s happened, either...

Which suggests Alina’s problems with her fame also aren’t new. When we first meet her, Alina is already a lot closer to a breakdown than she appears on the surface.

Having natural talent from an early age, Alina probably hasn’t learned how to deal with failure without spiraling into a full blown identity crisis. As a perfectionist, she’s also hypersensitive to even the slightest mistake. And given that she’s been famous for a few years at this point, her acting out is practically expected.

Just given the setting that she’s a well-known child prodigy, it’s not surprising that Alina has all these traits.

Alina’s Adults Are Useless

What is a bit disturbing, though, is that adults around Alina aren’t any help in protecting her from her fame.

Indeed, from what we see, the pattern is the opposite - over and over, the supposedly “responsible” adults in Alina’s life say her visibility matters more than her consent. Her teacher pressures her into competitions she dislikes and then gets on her case when she pushes back. Her parents put up her whole life story, including photos of her as a kid, without Alina’s approval or even permission.

Jumping ahead, I think it’s rather telling that Alina manages to destroy all her art, commit suicide, and get rescued by a third party – and none of these adults even visit her. A popular theory is that Alina’s parents are travelling in a different country. But - did no one tell them? Did they not care? As it is, anything Alina does – even blatant red flags like destroying a classroom and her own art – is treated as just another work of artistic genius, to be advertised and exhibited.

(Because apparently nothing says High Art like creep shots of a teenage girl having a mental breakdown.)

Of course, Alina isn’t being neglected or abused like Sana or Yuma. Not even close. But she’s not in a great situation either. She doesn’t really have anyone she can turn to in a crisis. The adults in her life mostly use her for their own ends, reinforcing that her worth is in her fame as an artist, not her value as a person.

Alina’s Peers Aren’t Much Better

Then, on a more subtle level, there are Alina’s peers. Whenever she’s mentioned by people her own age, she’s either the subject of scary rumors or glowing admiration. Other kids know her as a celebrity name to be idolized or feared, not a person.

Before becoming a magical girl, the only person who actually makes an effort to befriend Alina is Karin. But even she is initially caught up in the aura of Alina’s fame and contributes to the swirl of gossip around her.

The result is a situation where everyone around Alina has their own opinion on who she is. No one seems to care or leave space for who Alina wants herself to be. And Alina, not having a social life to fall back on, is increasingly left with “genius artist” as the only means she has to interact with the world. It’s a self-reinforcing spiral.

The Critic’s Letter

First, what it’s not: this isn’t about Alina getting a bad review and not being able to handle criticism of her work. She’s already won the competition. And Alina is perfectionistic to unhealthy levels - she’s already her own worst critic.

Rather, the letter’s insinuations are both subtler and crueler. As Alina says, the critic isn’t concerned with her artwork - he’s commenting on Alina as a person. Thus, the critic’s words are the same pattern as before, now crystallized into its sharpest and purest form.

Alina’s internal sense of identity is precariously fragile. Meanwhile, Alina’s external identity is being used as a canvas for other people’s desires. Even though all Alina really wants is to create art for her own sake, other people obsess over and dump their own meaning (or lack of meaning) onto her works.

Once again, Alina’s art is conflated with Alina herself. The person is being evaluated as a piece of art.

As if that wasn’t enough, the letter’s final insinuation that Alina is losing her brilliance is a triple threat. If she can’t create great art, Alina loses the activity she enjoys most. She also loses the one thing she knows other people value her for. And worst of all, she loses the only touchpoint she has for her sense of self.

Cue existential crisis. Alina’s life is Alina’s art. Alina’s art is Alina life. Without one, she doesn’t have any concept of the other.

And in the light of all this, her suicide makes perfect sense.

Alina’s Suicide

Welcome to the literal and figurative objectification of Alina. Literal, in that she’s turning into a corpse. Figurative in that by putting her body up for display, she’s allowing people to voyeuristically consume it – an idea further reinforced by the “Kusouzu / Nine Phases” reference in the title implying a tinge of sexual objectification as well.

Now that she’s destroyed all of her previous works, the only thing Alina leaves her audience to look at is Alina herself. Filming her body as it turns from a person into a dead object was simply the logical conclusion to a life of being displayed, objectified, and overwritten by others’ perceptions.

But how does Alina feel about this ending?

The day of her suicide, Alina rushes around in a kind of manic euphoria. This isn’t especially odd. After all, it’s not uncommon for a suicidal person to outwardly appear happier before they make an attempt, as finally having a concrete plan of action can feel like a huge relief.

Dying means a solution to Alina’s worries about her talent fading. Dying also means an end to all the pressure, all the constant struggle of performing to ever-heightening expectations. Alina can simply abandon the cases and tools once she’s done with them - no need to stress about the future when she won’t have one.

Alina’s farewell, though, betrays darker emotions. It’s simultaneously deeply spiteful - “this is what you all wanted from me, are you happy now?” - yet also an admission of utter defeat. Alina is giving up her very humanity and selfhood to be evaluated as whatever her audience wants.

Throughout the story, everyone keeps telling Alina that her art is intoxicating, pulling the viewer into it… but the reality is the exact opposite. Alina’s art was just something Alina made for herself, and any intoxicating meaning was something the viewer injected into it.

And thus, Alina’s revelation. Alina’s theme is “Alina’s beauty” – both a rejection and an embrace of that objectification. Now, Alina has declared that her art loudly and unabashedly about herself, viewer projection be damned. And yet, at the same time, since “Alina” is what viewers are obsessed with seeing, then Alina will give them exactly what they want…

An Artistic Failure?

So then why does Alina consider her final art to be a failure? It fits well within the theme of “Alina’s beauty.” Indeed, her later works like “Humanity’s Implicit Reward” and even her swimsuit are arguably just softer variations of the “Alina’s body as forbidden yet alluring object for the viewer to consume” idea that is present here.

This suicide also seems to fit into the “life and death” motifs she has. It’s a twisted kind of resurrection - effectively, she’s killing herself as a human in order to live on eternally as a memorable piece of art.

Alina plans her final work directly because she thinks she’s dying as a creator. Rather than face her brilliance fading, she chooses to defy it by going out in a blaze of glory. And when put that way, it’s an exciting and fitting conclusion.

There’s just one little problem with that narrative...

While drifting between life and death, Alina realizes the critic was wrong. She had a theme all along. Alina’s brilliance wasn’t fading.

And thus, since she wasn’t a “dying artist,” her “going out in a blaze of glory” no longer holds any profound meaning. She’s just a silly teenager who got too worked up over a harsh letter.

The overall concept behind Alina’s last work wasn’t the issue. The failure was in the timing and execution, killing herself before such a thing had meaning and in a way such that her body would be found.

And so, I don’t think Alina has learned her lesson here. I don’t think Karin’s words have gotten through to her yet. If she concludes at a later point that her talent is truly is fading or that she’s lost her theme, I’d fully expect her to pull another suicidal stunt again.

Conclusion

So the good news: Alina lived! She’ll have plenty more chances to create art and figure herself out!

But the bad news: Alina’s revelation implies she’s now even more reliant on her identity as a genius artist.

And thus, like so many other characters, the end to Alina’s MGS isn’t really an ending. She hasn’t solved the problem at the heart of the crisis that led to her wish. Becoming a magical girl and discovering witches does nothing to stop Alina from falling into another identity spiral, nor has she left her suicidal tendencies behind.

Alina found her theme, but she still hasn’t found herself.

Misc Details

Some other neat miscellaneous details that fit with this interpretation:

I’m glad the English translation keeps at least a little of the quirky way Alina refers to herself. (That being said, in Japanese, it’s even more exaggerated - she doesn’t use normal first person pronouns at all, only using “Alina.” )

Because on the one hand, this is an obvious hint at her extreme narcissism: Alina’s sentences frequently emphasize her name.

On the other hand, it’s a great subtle detail to return to the theme of objectification. To put it another way, Alina refers to herself in third-person. That is, even when Alina is speaking about herself, she reflexively frames it from the point of view of another person. Because Alina is constantly having other people’s perspectives forced onto her!

Also, it turns out the pattern of others projecting onto Alina is present in her witch as well! “Old Dorothy” is a historical figure whose diaries have been analyzed by multiple different researchers. Some of them came to the conclusion that Dorothy was definitely a witch, others came to the conclusion she was definitely a normal, upstanding member of her community. The researchers got completely opposite results from the same exact diaries. So therefore - did they truly care about learning what Dorothy was really like? Or were they just out to prove their own theories?

(Two years in, Old Dorothy is even more fitting of a name. Doroinu basically predicted the entire fan response to Alina. Some people see her as an evil (w)itch, some people see her as a sympathetic figure - all from looking at the same text.

We’re even starting to see the “two sides” of Alina come up in the Main Story, with Karin’s subplot in Arc 2.)

Meanwhile, Old Dorothy’s form - a “paint tube” - carries both this “paint over with your perceptions” meaning while also suggesting the same story as Alina’s final piece in miniature.

Unlike Izabel, Alina’s witch form isn’t that of an artist. Because when Alina hits her lowest point of despair, she no longer considers herself to be an artist. She believes the only value she has left is to become literal materials to create art.

In other words, Old Dorothy is Alina turning herself into art again. It’s just rainbow paint this time instead of red.

Last but not least: yes, I am absolutely aware of the irony of this essay. Here I am rambling about how Alina’s story is all about her struggle to be herself while everyone seems determined to erase her in favor of their own projections – and yet a good chunk of this interpretation is probably my projecting on her. Whoops!

Still, even if you disagree with it, I hope this essay was interesting and maybe made you question some of your assumptions about Alina.

Thanks for reading!

#madoka magica #magia record #alina gray #magia record analysis #my ramblings #long essay #read more #tl;dr #alina is certainly exaggerated #but in her MGS she comes across as #a surprisingly believable gifted kid #going through a nasty identity crisis #exacerbated by her fame

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poe30 · 4 years ago

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Summer Love part 3

Summer Love: Julie’s older cousin comes for a summer visit from the east coast, unaware of just what she’s going to get herself into, while helping out. But she’s got a secret of her own, one she’s hid from most of the family, and it includes her 6th sense. Will she be able to help save the ghost band from their curse or will it all blow up in their faces? Especially when a summer love blossoms between one of the ghost boys and herself.

Pairings: Ghost!Luke x Fem!Reader

.-.-. Summer Love Part 1

.-.-. Summer Love Part 2

~~~~~

It didn’t take long before a skater boy came rolling past, stopping right in front of her. Flickering her eyes over at him, she took in his appearance, definitely fit the description Rex had described, now it was just time to get some information out of him.

“Willie right?” The boy nodded, a little unsure, hoping he was making the right decision.

“I’m [y/n]. Its nice to meet you.” Giving him a soft smile, reassuring him you weren’t a threat, as you watched his eyes flicked to the closed garage, hearing the band play.

“Don’t worry about them, they’ll be in there for least another hour. But, let’s get down to business shall we?” Patting the spot next to her, he hopped up.

“Rex caught me up with what your little group plans on doing for everyone trapped.” He started, glancing down at her notes, a little impressed so far. “I don’t know how much help I can be, but if it gets everyone, myself and Callie free, I’m all in.” She chuckled at his happiness at that,

“Glad I’ll be able to help, hes been on our radar for a few years now, and he needs taken care.” Simply stating, before asking him all kinds of questions that was relatable to what Caleb’s were and how they worked. Writing down all he knew, she hummed, quite satisfied at the newfound information. Unaware to them that practice had ended, and quite unaware of the four figures watching them from the studio. Millions of questions going through their minds, only snapping out of it when [y/n] snapped the book close, thanking Willie for the information.

“Hopefully we can get this situation taken care of quickly.” Jumping off the hood, she rose a brow when she saw the band.

“Can we help you guys with something?” Willie turned to see the newcomers, giving a small wave to Alex, Jules being confused since she couldn’t see who she was talking to.

“You knowing so many ghosts is a big mystery to me [y/n].” Julie simply stated, causing the older Molina to shrug,

“In all do time, I’ll reveal why. But if you’ll excuse me, I got some work to do. Thank you meeting me so quickly Willie.” Patting him on the shoulder, she turned after grabbing her bag, she nodded to Julie to come along to give them some privacy.

“See you boys later, have fun with Willie, Alex!” [y/n] smirked, before the two took off back to the house, leaving two blushing boys behind, and two snickering.

“What did [y/n] need to talk to you about? I didn’t even think she knew to many ghosts.” the blonde asked, a little cautious of what the newcomers intentions were. Were they good? Bad? Alex couldn’t help but ask Willie.

“Just some tourists spots and what not. Had to warn her about staying away from Caleb too. He’s not too fond of her kind.” Willie explained, scratching the back of his nervously, keeping the real reason a secret for the time being, not needing her to come after him in a bad way, especially with needing her help.

“Her kind?” the confused boys asked, causing the skater to chuckle.

“You’ll have to ask her about it, I gotta go before Caleb gets suspicious. Ill see you later tonight Alex.” was all the skater said before riding away from the trio.

~~~~

“Is anyone else curious of [y/n] now, and what shes hiding?” Luke turned to his best friends, each giving their own form of agreement.

“What do we do about it though? We can’t just exactly confront her about it.” Alex pointed out the only flaw.

“Can always ask, Julie? She may know?” and with that in mind, they made their way up to their singers room, only to be met with both girls. Sighing softly, [y/n] rolled her eyes softly catching Luke’s eyes for a moment,

“We’ll talk more about this tomorrow, night Jules.” Smiling softly at Julie, when she wished her a good night, walking past the boys and out of her cousins room. The brown haired girl turned to her band mates with a rose brow.

“Who exactly is your cousin, Julie?” Luke’s blunt question took them all by surprise, especially the girl they were asking. Narrowing her eyes, Julie glared at them, the boys holding their hands up in defense before making their intentions clearer.

“What the idiot meant to say is, how is she able to see, hear, and even know more ghosts?” Alex said, not even bothering with Luke’s slight protest. Her glare easing up a little, as she thought about it. She too was curious to know as well,

“We’d have to talk to her about it. I never asked her about it, because this is the first time I’ve seen her in years.” She murmured, before her eyes going wide, a thought coming to mind. The book her grandfather used to have.

“The book..” murmuring to herself, unaware the boys heard her.

“A book?” Reggie asked the question they were all thinking, confusion going on between the three.

“What’s a book got to do with this?” The boys sitting wherever they could, hoping someone would explain it to them.

“It’s not just a book, but an old worn out book our grandfather kept. I can’t remember much, but it definitely had supernatural in it.” She tried thinking back to what exactly was in the book, but was coming up with blanks. “I don’t know where the book went, it disappeared one day.” Frowning, as she groaned, plopping back on her bed.

“Doesn’t [y/n] have a bunch of old worn books? Do you think one of them could be your grandfathers?” Alex ran a hand through his hair, knowing exactly what his friends now planned on doing.

“Guys, no. We can’t invade her privacy like this. Did you forget she told us not to open any of them?” The drummer tried to reason with them all, Julie taking his side instantly.

“Boundaries guys. Don’t go making her mad alright? Respect her privacy. I’ll talk to her about it in the morning and we’ll get to the bottom of this.” After a few minutes they had no choice but to oblige to her wishes. Knowing one way or another, they were gonna find out just what [y/n] was hiding from them, and they hoped it wouldn’t end up a disaster.

~~~~~

To say the next morning was eventful, would’ve been an understatement. [y/n] had woken up and gotten around to do her daily things, and the last thing she had to do was gather up her books to start working on helping Willie out. Only to find out, all her books were missing, and she was furious.

“Julie!” Her voice rang out, startling the poor girl awake, as her door was slammed open. Julie rubbed her eyes, looking over at her angry cousin, and instantly knew the boys had something to do with this.

“My books are missing, the ones I specifically told them not to look in.” Eyes going darker, as Alex and Reggie poofed in, seeing the look on [y/n]’s face, told them all they needed to know. Two sets of eyes locked onto the two boys, one seething and the other disappointed.

“Where are my/her books?” The girls questioned at the same time, [y/n] taking a couple steps closer to them, as they tried to hide behind Julie.

“We don’t know!” [y/n] growled, not liked being lied to,

“Either tell me, or you won’t ever be able to play your instruments again.” Her voice was low, threatening, as the boys shivered from her tone, before coughing it up that Luke had took them while they’ve slept. Eyes ablaze, she quickly turned around and made her way towards the studio, Julie scrambling to get out of bed to follow behind her pissed off cousin.

~~~~

Slamming the studio doors open, a gust of wind blew in, the atmosphere chilling with the new arrival. All the books were open with papers scattered around. Luke jumped up, eyes going wide when he realized he was caught red handed. Alex and Reggie poofing in off to the side, Julie finally catching up next to her cousin. With a flick of her wrist, the papers nestled themselves back in the pages they belonged to, the books shutting and flying back into her bag, which was laid next to his feet.

“Give me one good reason, I shouldn’t break your nose.” She snarled out, walking towards him like a predator stalking their prey, ready to tear him apart. What she didn’t expect though, was the fire that was slowly rising in his eyes.

“Who exactly are you, [y/n].” Luke was never the one who liked someone who kept secrets away from him, or his friends. The other three could only watch, not knowing how to handle the ticking time bomb in the room. Chuckling darkly, her eyes narrowed even more at him, growing darker shade of blue.

“Medium, psychic, witch. I can be whatever you want. I’m sure you figured that all out when you snooped through my books.” Standing now toe to toe with Luke, who was slowly lost at words.

“Don’t touch my belongings again without my permission, or something will happen. An, you will not like the outcome of it, I promise you that.” She warned, grabbing her bag by his feet and putting it on one of her shoulders. Taking a deep breath, she gave him some credit, no ones ever stood up to her before, especially not a cute ghost like Luke. Eyes widening slowly at the thought, she shook her head, before falling back into the chair. Groaning, as she ran a hand down her face, taking a few deep breaths.

“I should storm out of here, and be pissed off. But I figured this would happen with three curious little ghosts haunting around. Sit, all of you.” Placing her bag by her feet, she waited till they all had sat down. “First off, congrats Luke. You’re the first one to stand up to me when I’ve been fired up” Rolling her eyes softly when she saw the small grin on his face, looking completely unaffected by her threat a few mere minutes ago.

“[y/n].. what are those books? Is grandfathers one of them.” Jules curiosity rang out in the quiet room, the girl nodding to the question.

“Aye, his is one of the many books I have. It explains why you can see ghosts now Julie. It runs in the family, kinda. It skips the males in the house now, for some odd reason but. Congrats on unlocking your sixth sense.” Sending her a small smile, before eyeing the boys. “Its a pain sometimes, but I’m glad your first time dealing with it, is with these fellas.” gesturing to the three of them, proud smiles on their faces as the girls rolled their eyes.

“Now.. these books here, are whats going to help my friends and I, put Caleb down a few pegs.” The boys froze and glanced at each other, fueling her curiosity before it clicked. “You three made a damn deal with him didn’t you?” She growled lowly, knowing there was now more at stake than just Willie, Callie and everyone else trapped.

“We didn’t know it at the time! We just shook his hand and it was there.” Alex explained, causing her to furrow her brows, confused.

“Caleb just doesn’t give his mark to just anyone unless they’re a threat to him.”

“You learned all that just from those books?” Reggie asked, causing Julie to nudge him hard in the stomach,

“Obviously shes been getting information from someone about him.” Her words clicked in their minds, she was getting her information from Willie.

“Willie’s been giving you information hasn’t he? Is that why he was here yesterday?” Alex started freaking out a little, knowing if he got caught, something bad would happen to him. [y/n] got up when Alex started pacing, placing a hand on his shoulder,

“Look, Alex, that’s one of the reasons I’m here. Caleb has been out of control with power hungry in a sense. Willie got a hold of my friend as a last resort to help get his soul back along with others. They don’t wanna be under his thumb anymore, they wanna be them and free. My friends and I are the only ones who can set them free. Trust me on this, we’ll set your boyfriend free.” Smirking softly when the boys cheeks flushed pink at the last part, as Alex tried to deny it, the boys chuckle in the background.

“How do you plan on stopping him?” Stopping in front of Luke, she rose a brow down at his question,

“We pretty much have a good idea on how we’re going to stop him. But, we’re missing the final piece before we can even begin the plan.” Running a hand through her hair, she sat next to Luke on the arm piece of the couch. “If we can figure out where it is, we can set them all free, including you three.”

Silence fell over the group for a few minutes, before they heard Ray call to them that breakfast was done, and to come eat before it got cold. Heaving themselves off their seats, and grabbing her bag, she stopped by the door, Julie a few feet in front of her,

“Well, now that you know why I’m here. Stay out of my things without permission. Last warning.” Warning them, eyes lingering on Luke’s figure a little longer than the other two, who gave into submission along with Luke.

~~~~

Tags: @crybabyddl

{If you want on the tag list, just lemme know!}

#julie and the phantoms #julie molina #luke x reader #luke patterson #reggie #alex jatp #short story #ghosts #angst #romance #x reader

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lost-eternity · 5 years ago

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Matchup Requests *CLOSED*

This was done as a trade instead of a standard match up, hence why I am permitting it. :)

Matchup for @stormra

okie dokie I match you with...

I have to admit, this was a bit of a difficult one. It was really between Charles Grey and Sebastian. And it was close. But a few small details caused me to lean towards Grey instead of Sebby. I’ll explain why later on.

First of all, your love languages mesh rather perfectly

Charles Grey’s (inflated) ego causes him to thoroughly enjoy the praise and affection you lavish upon him

He enjoys being treated as a prince and has no inclination to returning these affections

It’s a selfish love but weirdly enough, it works

He also doesn’t give enough craps to care for society or propriety to be embarrassed or ashamed of your advances

He is quite inept at displaying physical affection and his attempts are half-hearted at best

It’s that blasted ego again

But he does try. In his own little way

He may (attempt to) awkwardly cook something for you, or more likely than not, force you to take fencing lessons

He always wins

And he goes really hard on you claiming that you would never learn if he went easy

It’s laborious and by the end of each session you are close to collapsing from exhaustion

Insert a lewd joke here, “Oh, my dear, if this is how easily you tire, I better condition you for my bedchamber...”

Yeah, it turns out he is a complete pervert sometimes

But fencing is one of the few ways he can actually express himself

Which seems a bit paradoxical if that expression is affection or love

But it is kind of cute.

He is determined to teach you, and although he may not be the most outwardly affectionate, the amount of time and effort he invests in you is enough to tell you how much he cares

He is a very busy man you know, running missions and odd errands for the queen

His free time is extremely precious for him

So the mere fact that he is spending it with you is a lot more monumental than most people would assume

But you are smart enough to realise this

And that is one of the reasons I did not pair you with Sebastian.

Sebastian is a lot more how shall we put it... salacious. His flirting is subtle in public but that bastard would do anything to make his lover blush, testing the limits of society and still managing to get by without being caught... somehow. It’s his way of exercising control and I think that would really clash with your love language.

So,

Charles Grey is also a rather chipper fellow.

Like "chipper" may be an understatement

Excitable puppy man is more like it, at least when it comes to fencing... or maiming... the dude has weird hobbies

But he really understands your desire to travel. He is full of jittery energy that he uses releases running errands for the Queen, travelling across all of the UK. And really most of Europe running diplomacy missions and handling sensitive cases

He would probably be hesitant to allow you to accompany him

But you'd wear him down eventually

Grey really understands your wanderlust, he has a hard time focusing on monotonous tasks or locations as well

So he may allow you to join him

With one *small* caveat

You have to defeat him in a fencing duel first

Which is absolute shit. But you understand where he is coming from.

That ego of his leads him to consider himself the best swordsman in Europe, if not the world

He figures that if you manage to strike him down then you could handle yourself with anyone

And that is no small task

It seems entirely daunting and near impossible (which is probably another reason he assigned it)

And that brings me to my next point.

Charles Grey needs some who is open minded and chill enough to out up with his shit

But also stubborn and outspoken enough to shut him down when he tries some spectacularly stupid

Which is why you would work well with him. Not only does your nonchalance perfectly foil his constant energy and inquisitive nature, but you also have set your boundaries and know when to shut down schemes and ideas

So yeah

You begin training extra hard

For maybe like a day

Then you give up

It's hard, everything hurts, you are exhausted, and all you MIGHT get out of it is one lousy trip

So you begin putting training sessions off

"I'm not feeling well."

"I'll start once I finish this book"

"Oooh, it's too late now"

To say that Grey would be discouraged and slightly hurt is an understatement

His passion and life blood is fencing. He has worked really hard to get to this point and the fact that his significant other takes no interest in it wounds him

This could definitely be a point of discourse if your relationship

But you have to remain open with each other and talk it out

That is the most important thing. Communication. And let's be honest. Charles isn't not going to say shit

He is "too manly" or too egotistical to admit his feelings

You'd have to be the one to approach him on the matter

But I feel like you would. You are used to hearing problems from your friends. You know when something is wrong and better yet, you listen

After a talk, he understands that it may not be the fencing specifically you are disinterested in

But you just struggle to maintain motivation

And from that moment on, Charles Grey becomes your personal cheerleader

He's the mom at a soccer game freaking s c r e e c h i n g and going "that's my girl!" whenever you win a match

He takes pride in all he does, and he is proud of his protégé

He never allows you to lose motivation and is (annoyingly) insistent about the fencing

Which again, could lead to some arguments if you resist

But he is doing it from a place of love because he can see how miserable you are cooped up in the same place

He knows you

And finally, the day arrives that you set to duel Charles Grey himself. If you win, you get to attend some of his missions with him (others are too sensitive to risk being seen by a civilian)

You are understandably nervous, but also introspective. Honestly it is probably a tidal wave of emotions far too complex to convey with words

But ill try

Let me just....

This morning was like most mornings.

A heavy fog blanketed the docile countryside, most animals just began to shake off the effects of the previous night's slumber.

Commoners rose with the peeking rays of the sun, beginning to perform their routine tasks before the last of the fog had been burned away by the heat. For most people this day was completely, utterly, ordinary.

But not for you.

This day meant everything. This day meant your freedom.

You had risen before even the sun, shedding your skirts in exchange for ivory fencing gear, exchanging your fan for a rapier and your hats for a meshed mask. This had been your life for the past year, and would continue to be so until your final breath.

But today. Today was different.

Today determined your future. And quite frankly, your sanity.

And all you had to do was defeat your lover in close quarters combat. A monumental task in-of itself. Half of your acquaintances thought you mad, the other half patronized you, treating your struggle as a desperate cry for attention. They simply couldn't understand why a lady would go through such trouble as to challenge the country’s greatest swordsman. A woman's place was in the house, and in home is where she is complete. Why would she bother her pretty little head and sully herself in the wretched world around her? That was a man's job, such trifling affairs should be of no concern for a lady.

"She is odd, that one." They would say. But they didn't understand, how could they?

Raised under the constrictive hand of the patriarchy, they were forced into complacency. A complacency so culturally ingrained that they themselves never sought to question it. Or, those that did often keeled to the whims of man's iron fist in fear of social ostracism and reputational backlash.

But you were different.

From childhood you felt the pangs, the longing to not only see but experience both the beauty and sorrow of the world around you. To learn and ingrain yourself with the cultures, to explore every nook and cranny of your planet. You could never understand why those around you seemed so content with living and dying inconsequentially, never experiencing the midnight sun or the sweeping winds of the steppe. Dying without ever truly living. Merely existing in their self-made reality, completely ignorant to the bright, beautiful world around them.

Why stay put when you can travel?

Why exist when you can live?

These questions, along with the persistent voice of your instructor (and fiancé), kept you focused and motivated. All of that training, all of those hours of arduous, grueling work had lead to this moment.

You stood within the fencing hall, the lack of bodies usually present caused the room to echo with each clicking foot fall on the tile floor. It was wide, empty, and entirely unwelcoming. It felt like a stranger to you, despite the year of training you had completed within its walls.

Before you stood a similarly dressed figure, its face obscured by the dark meshing that covered the helmet.

It was entirely impersonal.

A faceless enemy in a sea of a faceless crowd.

But you knew better. His posture was all too familiar to you. The slight tilt of his head, the pitch of his shoulders, the strangely comforting steady hand in which he held his weapon. This was your lover, Charles Grey. And your opponent.

It was definitely surreal. He rarely ever wore his mask in training. The absence of his characteristic gloating smile and talkative nature felt almost lacking. It was rare that he would be so quiet... so solemn. But he was just as aware of your current situation as you were. And how much it meant to you.

Without a word, he raised his weapon and the battle commenced.

It was an intense battle

With every blow he performed, your parried and dodged

With a feline grace, you danced up-top light heels, twirling and spinning in an almost melodic fashion

Metal clashed against metal, each crack ringing through your ears

You had trained enough with him to know that he had a tendency to leave his left side unguarded and exposed

But he also trained with you to know that you can forget to guard your knees

And as the minutes tick by, marking one of the longest conflicts you had ever had with him, exhaustion sets into your bones

And you falter

The blow is lightning fast, you hardly have a chance to comprehend his movements

But his hips are besides yours, his knee hooked behind your leg.

He pushed you backwards with his forearm, causing you to fall backwards, only to trip on his knee and slam against the ground

Something cool and metallic is pressed to the back your neck

You don't need to look to know it is the rapier and that you have lost

The sound of you two's laboured breaths echoes through the empty chambers

Several seconds tick by as the two of you gather your thoughts

...You... lost

You finally turn yourself around, noticing that Charles had removed his fencing helmet

Damp silver hair sticks to his forehead, matted and plastered across his face

For a moment, a look of sorrow flickered across his handsome features, only to be replaced by that typical cheeky grin

"You lost, luv. Better luck next time, eh?"

You never really had much of a plan

But seeing that smug expression kicked your instincts into overdrive

With one fluid scissor sweep, you dislodged his balancing, a well-placed kick aiming where the sun don't shine toppled him over entirely

And then he was on the floor next to you, his face contorted in an express of pain

You were quick to discard his weapon and straddle him, keeping his wrists pinned above his head to the floor

"Lesson one: never trust your opponent"

You parroted this line to him, one he had told you many of times

He only managed a pained grunt in response

Chuckling, you apologized with a chaste kiss which he all too eagerly accepted

He was probably just being theatrical to get more kisses

You did not have much time to ponder the situation before a polite round of applause erupted from a nearby alcove

You nearly jumped out of your skin

You did not notice the shawled figure, cloaked in all black, like a walking shadow

The figure took a few steps forward, emerging to the light

And that is when you realized who it was

Queen Victoria herself

By her side, astute as always was the man you practically considered a brother

Charles Phipps

By now, you were extremely aware of the suggestive position you were in

Straddling Charles Grey, your hips against his, his wrists clasped tightly in your hands and pinned above his head

And oh, gods that insufferable smirk with which he was regarding

"As you can see, your majesty, my darling is highly... proficient." Grey practically hummed

You quickly scrambled to your feet, unsure how to handle yourself in the presence of a queen

Turns out, Grey had invited her to witness your duel in hopes of securing you a position under her employ. Either as an emissary or housekeeper.

According to Phipps, She was quite impressed by your performance, even though you lost

The only other person she had seen to be able to keep pace with Grey was Phipps... and a certain blonde who shall not be named

And that is the story of how you became the head maid for the Queen herself and an emissary on par with Grey himself, running missions as a husband-wife warrior squad, haha

You two probably met in an odd way

I’d say for a fact that you were attracted to Sphere music hall

It’s like that place was made for you

Semi-modern concert style music hall which people hailing from all backgrounds and classes intermingled together in harmony

Divinations and readings were done for free and in return, each patron was given a bracelet depicting their star sign.

As a matter of fact, a lot had to do with the star signs.

Meditations were conducted in between hours and food served

It was a really great place to go, somewhere you fit it because you had always been an outcast

Forced to keep your craft a secret in fear of retribution from the church, you usually made coin as a street performer and singer

It was not a lot, but it was certainly enough to keep you off the streets

Unfortunately that also meant you were constricted to the same place

Your family had consistently tried to marry you off to some rich white dude

Well, rich(er)

But you did not want to be wife and then a stay at home mother

That was somehow worse than your current situation

Also your opinionated and confident demeanour often scared off potential suitors

It was a serious problem because apparently women were supposed to be soft spoken and weak.

But you on other other hand, never showed weakness

It was far too “masuline” apparently

So you decided to strike out on your own and try to make it as a singer

Easier said than done

In the music hall, you truly felt free to express yourself

Its charismatic leader put major emphasis on the stars and night sky, he was extremely introspective and the two of you instantly hit it off (I considered matching you with Blavat instead of Grey but I kinda feel like you two would work better as friends)

You were completely enthralled with his demeanour and exuberance

And you consistently attended the hall as it was the only place you felt you truly belonged, no one casting judgmental stares, no whispers behind your back, and most of all, you felt a sense of camaraderie that you have never felt before

And as a result, you fell victim to the cult

Initially, the Queen garnered concerns over the existence of this Music Hall and the traction it was gaining. As a result, she sent out her very own Charles and Phipps to scope out the place before sending word to Ciel Phantomhive

Infiltrating undercover as guests, the Queen’s handy butlers began an inspection of the area

There they ran into you

Literally

You were in the middle of entertaining a small portion of attendees with a song at the behest of Blavat himself (he was actually looking to hire you as a backup singer for the Starlight Four but you were not aware of this)

You were reaching the crescendo of your song when a drunken man slammed into you

You uttered an apology but he seemed rather intent on making himself a nuisance

“Watc’ yaaaa, yaaa stoopid *hic* bitccccc”

You took a few steps back in response as he staggered forward, raising a palm as if to strike you

Before you could react, a flash of white covered your vision

A man stood before you, sword drawn and dawned in a blindingly white coat

Silver tresses rolled down his back, as he glared up at your attacker from behind attractively long lashes

How he managed to sneak a rapier into the party was completely beyond you, yet here he was

“Now, didn’t your mama teach you manners?” He cooed, a slightly maniacal smile across his lips

“Yoooou wanna go?” The man sneered, “I can tak *hic* you pwetty boooy”

Of course, this scene began to attract attention

The murmurings and pleasant violin music had all but stopped as thousands of eyes turned to face you

Blavat had to step in, nervously defusing the situation

He had the drunkard escorted out and moved to confiscate the weapon from the white-clad man only to get the think pointed at his throat

“A man’s worth is in his sword. It would be cruel to take that away from him.”

You were entirely unsure if he was being literal or making a dirty innuendo with that statement

Regardless of his intentions, he was promptly thrown out as well

Much to the chagrin of a separate, similarly dressed man who seemed down right exasperated with his partner’s trigger happy (blade happy?) tendencies.

You decided to follow this peculiar stranger out and thank him for what he did

You found him trying to crawl through a window, seeking re-entry into the part.

“Uh, excuse me...” You called to him as he fiddled with the lock on the window. You had no idea how he managed to climb up that high in such a short amount of time, but he had perched himself rather precariously on the window sill.

“Not right now, luv.” He called back, “I am busy.”

“I just wanted to thank you for what you did back there. I could have been hurt.”

He paused, not once looking back at you. “Right. Who are you?”

You were rather taken aback

He literally just saved you, how could he not remember you?

“Look, if you aren’t going to pay me the mind to even look at me, I won’t take the effort to thank you.” You huffed and turned to walk away

“I wouldn’t go back there if I were you.”

His voice caused you to halt in your tracks. You spun around to stare at him incredulously. “Excuse you?”

God, those silver eyes were breathtaking as he gazed at you, practically oozing with a feline grace

“Those people aren’t good people.” He stated in a matter-of-fact tone

“Oh? And what do you know about them?” You retorted defensively

“More than you, obviously.” He finally managed to pry the window open. “Her majesty has good instincts. She knows this place is dangerous, else-wise she wouldn’t have sent me.”

And with that weirdly convoluted and vague sentence, he slipped back inside and disappeared

You were left to ponder the meaning of his words

Her majesty?

This bloak knew the bloody Queen?!?!

What else did he know?

What could possibly be so bad about the hall?

You decided to call it quits early that night to process. You never thought you would ever see him again, or so you thought

You had been doing your research, sticking your nose in places you probably should not have

Blavat, someone you once considered a close and trusted friend almost seemed menacing to you

And he definitely picked up on your closed off body language

But you knew that something fishy was going on during those “private” events. Only specific people were ever invited (AKA not you)

It all just seemed really sus

And you were determined to find out

So you snuck in

Having spent many hours in the hall, you were aware of certain passages and entrances that others were not

And you were able to sneak in without much issue

But you weren’t able to see much

A heavy smoke filled the air, smelling pleasantly of posies and roses

Your eyes began to droop and heaviness set into your lids

And you fell asleep

You woke up, with the concerned and slightly perturbed face of Blavat staring down at you

Well, shit... busted

“We had a nice thing going, y/n. And you just had to ruin it.” Blavat stated callously. “You know those events are private.”

And with that, you were barred from entering the music hall... permanently

This was definitely rather devastating as it was the only place you could truly be yourself without fear of rejection of prosecution

But now you were more sure than ever that something was amiss in that hall

Why else would they be so strict?

You were probably only left alive because they knew that whatever gas they used to put out those in attendance also affected you before you could see anything incriminating

And so you began trying to locate that mysterious man in white

He seemed to have more answers than you did

It did not take long to figure out his name and occupation. Charles Grey. Butler to the Queen herself

He must have been quite the impressive butler to be going out on scouting missions for the Queen and not just serving tea

Regardless, gaining an audience with him was nearly impossible

So you would just have to attract his attention...

Somehow

Given his affinity towards sword fights, you were sure that a loud brawl outside the palace itself would almost certain garner his attention

The real question was, where in the world would you get people foolish enough to pull such a stunt and risk getting arrested

Sooo, maybe not that

You might have to work backwards

Ask around and find those that may be acquaintances with him

Which was a lot harder than it looked

It took days of searching, but you were eventually sent to speak with a mortician who according to your contact “knows everyone who is no one”... whatever that meant

It did not take too long to find out

This mortician was... eccentric to put it in the most polite of terms

But he was definitely connected with Britain's underbelly

Which you assumed is where the “everyone who is no one” comes from

You came in hoping to pay him off, to which he blatantly refused, instead asking for you to make him laugh

Which was an odd request but one which you were willing to comply if it meant breaking the case

You spent hours trying different tactics to no avail

Until you sang a very dirty and very perverted song (Most likely “God’s Loophoel”. Yeah, actually don’t look that up, it is exactly as it sounds)

He seemed to enjoy that far too much as his cackles were absolutely thunderous

In tears, he kindly revealed to you that he was familiar with this Charles Grey and could pull a few favours to get you in contact

But he never said when, nor did he ever say where

But he did ensure word of your snooping reached the ears of Charles Grey who surprised you in your own home whilst you were halfway dressed

He initially was very cross with you poking around, scolding you and chastising you saying that it was “no business for a lady”

But you shut him down pretty quick

And afterwards, the two of you hit it off and decided to make evening tea on Sundays a staple thing

Grey would inform you about the progress of the Sphere Music hall and in return, you would keep well away from it

It worked out for the two of you

But word of your sniffing around had also reached the ears of one certain earl and his own demonic butler

I would be careful about what questions you ask and where you poke your nose

We wouldn’t want it to get bitten off, now would we?

this was a lot of fun to write, I hope you enjoyed reading it, dear. Let me know what you thought

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jazy3 · 5 years ago

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Thoughts on Grey’s Anatomy: 16X21

I loved this episode! It finally happened! Hayes asked Meredith out and she said YES!!! I’m so happy right now! We're going to see them go on a date and have drinks next season! It’s all I could have hoped for and more! I can’t wait! This episode was a finale that wasn’t supposed to be a finale. With that in mind I wasn’t sure what to expect, but it was great! I loved this episode! Mainly because it delivered on the one thing I’d been hoping for since the mid season premiere! It didn’t have the usual shock factor that comes at the end of a planned Grey’s finale, but it was exciting and we got movement on pretty much all of the major storylines up to this point. It’s not where the cast and crew were planning to leave things for this season, but with the sudden onset of the COVID-19 virus and the mandatory shutdowns worldwide they were forced to halt production when filming for this episode had wrapped.

So with that in mind this episode leaves things in a pretty good place with some great set up for next season. Originally the shutdowns and the quarantine was supposed to be temporary and so I had hoped that they would be able to come back and film the remaining four episodes for this season as from what I’ve read the scripts have already been written and the plan was already in place. Unfortunately, since none of us know when the quarantine will end they have decided to roll those episodes into next season and rejig what would have been episode 16X22 to make it more exciting so that it can be the season opener for Season 17.

While I’m sad we won’t see the remaining four episodes as planned this hopefully means that there won’t be any filler episodes next seasons as they’ll rejig and add the four from this season and then write 21 new ones. So let’s talk about that scene with Meredith and Hayes! It was so so great! After hearing the news that she and the other doctors had finally found a diagnosis for Richard’s condition Hayes sought Meredith out as she was leaving for the night. He congratulated her on a great catch and asked her if she’d like to grab a drink with him and celebrate. She said yes, but said she was to exhausted to go out right now and asked her if he’d ask her again some other time. He said of course and told her he’d see her later and she said goodbye for the night.

There were so many things I loved about that scene! It was perfect! I loved that Hayes respected Meredith’s boundaries. He didn't push or try to change her mind. He understood what she was saying and accepted it. With any other love interest they’ve put her with that would have been a whole thing. They would have tried to change her mind or argued with her or tried to convince her and that’s not okay. But Hayes doesn’t do that. Why? Because he’s a mature adult who’s got his stuff together who understands the concept of consent and that yes, but not right now does not mean convince me.

I love that he's so understanding! He gets it! She's tired. She wants to go home and sleep, but she also wants to go out with him when she's feeling better and he wants that too! I can't wait to see them go out! I'm so happy. He's so smitten! Just the way he looks at her! And the way she looks at him! She's so into him! My heart! I love that they established that Hayes doesn’t like setups and he doesn’t even know that he’s in one right now! Jo’s sure not going to tell him. Where would be the fun in that? And he’s right that people are talking about his personal life when he’s not around. Specifically, the fact that Cristina sent him across the Atlantic and set him up with Meredith and everyone’s into it. I love it so much!

Also how deceiving was that episode description? “Hayes asks Meredith a surprising question.” It’s only surprising if you’ve never seen the show before or aren’t caught up on this season! Hayes has been into Meredith since he got to Seattle and Meredith has been into Hayes since they worked that Vaping case together. It’s very obvious in the googly heart eyes they keep making at each other all the time. I love that Hayes asking Meredith out was done in a subtle way with not a lot of fanfare. I really loved that. Because the episode description made it seem like it was going to be this big dramatic thing and I love that it wasn’t. Because real life is not like that. Real life is about the small moments. The intimate moments. The moments that matter. That come naturally when you build up a rapport with someone over time. And that’s what Meredith and Hayes have built.

I was also worried, especially after the Conference episode, that Hayes was still processing his grief in such a way that he wouldn’t feel comfortable asking Meredith out or that everything that’s been happening with DeLuca and now Richard would make him hesitant to ask her out or take the next step. Instead, we saw the opposite. Jo made comments about how him and Meredith would be good together and implied that other people thought so too. He heard about the nonsense that DeLuca had pulled yet again and he heard about what was going on with Richard and his eventual diagnosis. Instead of preventing him from asking her out it actually propelled him. He heard about what had happened with Richard, sought her out, offered his sympathies, congratulated her on a great catch. He then used that as a spring board to ask her out and in response she reciprocated his feelings and said yes! It was subtle, simple, and sweet. As it so often is in real life when you meet the right person.

I’m a big Taylor Swift fan and the slow burn they’ve created for Meredith and Hayes and the way he asked her out really reminded me of Taylor’s music and album journeys from reputation to Lover. The reputation album is about the death of Taylor’s reputation and her response to it. But as she has spoken about in interviews it’s also about a beautiful love story. It’s about how in some of her darkest times she found and formed the most beautiful and amazing relationship with her partner Joe. There’s this undercurrent running through the album about that relationship as it begins. Then in Lover it blossoms fully and we get to hear all about it and how great finding that kind of whole hearted love really is.

To me there is such a great parallel between that musical journey and the relationship we see forming between Meredith and Hayes. It’s this beautiful undercurrent that’s forming amidst the constant chaos that is Meredith’s life and that’s a wonderful thing. It’s this steady current in the background that once given the chance to fully bloom will blossom into this beautiful thing. I’m excited that we’ll get to see that next season. Hayes was back in a big way this episode and I loved it! I love him as a character. I really hope they make him a series regular next season because he is great and he needs more screen time. The female patient Daya who couldn’t express emotion or smile because of her condition and needed facial surgery was hilarious!

I'm really glad that they figured out what was wrong with Richard and he's on the mend! I'm glad Richard kicked Catherine out. She deserved that and in fairness to him he doesn't remember her being there. It looks like he doesn't remember anything prior to the Conference so I get why he's mad. He was also real petty about it and I loved that. Although I was surprised that Meredith wasn't in his room with Maggie and Jackson and Catherine at the end.

She’s his family too and up until he married Catherine she was he’s next of kin, his emergency contact, and had medical power of attorney. Catherine’s left him and was MIA prior to him getting sick, Richard didn’t even know that Maggie existed until a few years ago, and Jackson had barely spoken to the man until Maggie pointed out that Richard thought he was taking Catherine’s side in the divorce. Side note: I’m glad that Maggie and Winston are still texting! Steamily I might add! He should definitely move to Seattle next season!

DeLuca annoyed the crap out of me this episode not because he was wrong, but because of the way he chose to express his opinions as usual. He was right but instead of explaining that calmly to others he screamed at Richard's family and threw a bunch of sharp surgical instruments onto the OR floor while Richard was on the table. I really hope they write him off next season because he annoys the crap out of me, he still hasn’t picked a speciality yet, and I feel they’ve gone as far as they can with his character and then some.

As for that end scene with Meredith and DeLuca here’s how I saw it. I didn't see it as her going home with him. I saw it as she was on her way home when she found him crying on the floor and either drove him home or admitted him for treatment. They established that Carina's back in Seattle so I think she either she drove him home and then called Carina to come take care of her brother or got him admitted and then called her to follow up and then went home and got some well deserved sleep.

I'm glad that he's finally acknowledged that he's got a problem and needs help. That's the first time since he started behaving erratically that we've seen that so that's good. I hope Carina can get him some help and get him admitted somewhere or that Meredith already has. More and more I see the interactions between Meredith and DeLuca as motherly. She’s clearly concerned about him and feels guilty because he went to jail for her and is now failing apart. I hope they write him off next season, but if they don’t I hope he gets the treatment he needs and they both move on or they remain in each other’s lives on a friendly co-worker basis as that’s the only time they ever really work on screen in my opinion. They don’t have chemistry romantically or as friends. I loved that moment in the OR where Bokhee prayed over Richard! Bokhee for the win!

Teddy was a hot mess as usual! I knew the truth was going to come out eventually, but I did not expect that god damn! I'm not an Owen fan, but that scene in the supply closet was still a gut punch. Oof! I loved Tom's speech to Teddy and how he called her out on the fact that she was running into marrying Owen rather than confront her own confused feelings. Teddy really needs to figure out what she wants and pick a lane! I hated the fact that she had sex with Tom in his office and then when he said let's run away together she told him this was goodbye and she was marrying Owen. Who does that? No matter what side you are on here Teddy’s behaviour is just not okay! Oy vey!

I’m glad that Owen stood her up and cancelled the wedding. It’s bad enough that she’s engaged to Owen and carrying on an affair with Tom, but the fact that she had sex with Tom in his office on the day of her wedding and then had the audacity to tell him that was goodbye and she was marrying Owen when she is clearly conflicted is an awful thing to do to everyone. She’s literally hurting all parties involved and that’s just awful. Also how is she planning on explaining this to her kids when they’re older?

Amelia and Link we're super cute this episode! I'm glad that their baby is okay and healthy and that Amelia is okay after what happened with her first pregnancy. She’s been through enough and it looks like she’s finally getting something good in her life with a beautiful new baby and a healthy pregnancy and delivery and a wonderful supportive partner. The throwback to Bailey being there for Amelia like George was there for her was so beautiful! Kudos to Bailey for showing all that strength after she suffered a miscarriage recently!

I'm glad we got to see Bailey spend time with Richard as I felt that was missing last episode. Carina was great in this episode! She has so much potential as a character and I wish they would use her more. She’s such a badass and her facial expressions are always on point. Although I only watch Station 19 sporadically these days I love her relationship with Maya. I’m not an Andrew DeLuca fan at all and I would love if they would start focusing on her more and move her brother back into the background or off the show entirely.

Jo was hilarious! I’m glad she’s getting her spunk back. She reminds me in a lot of ways of Amelia from her early Private Practice days. I loved her comments to Jackson in the OR! Real talk though, what do you think Jackson’s dating profile pic would be? Jet or Yacht? Comment below! Also I love that Jo is so team MerWidow! She totally ships them together! And she's helping to make it happen! Go Jo!

I love how she almost spilled the beans to Hayes about Cristina setting him and Meredith up but then stopped when she realized he didn't know and didn't like set ups. I'm glad she did. Because if she'd said something further then Hayes might not have asked Meredith out. I feel like by the time the truth comes out Meredith and Hayes will already have been dating for a while so he'll be annoyed, but it won't change the way he feels about Meredith. Although let’s be honest nothing could he’s so smitten and he should be! Meredith is amazing and she deserves an amazing man like Hayes.

I saw someone on Twitter comment that it looks like the storyline with Meredith and Hayes beginning to date and the truth coming out about how Cristina set them up was supposed to play out in the next few episodes and I think that’s true. I’m sorry we won’t get to see it this season because of the shutdown but I’m really excited to see this play out next season. Something that did surprise me is that the character interactions in this episode imply that Jo didn’t tell Meredith about what DeLuca did to her and tried to do to her at the bar in the episode ‘Life on Mars’ and still hasn’t told her. I’m surprised by that because Meredith and Jo are friends, what DeLuca did was disgusting and unforgivable, and Jo clearly hasn’t forgotten. In fact in this very episode she made it super clear to Hayes that she detests DeLuca and hates the idea of him and Meredith together and so do others.

This once again brings to light the big problem with DeLuca in that the only reason Meredith went out with him, continued to date him, and continues to interact with him out of concern is because her friends and family aren't being completely honest with her about his behaviour and how he acts when she’s not around. Because let’s face it. If Meredith knew what DeLuca was really like when she wasn’t there she wouldn’t give that asshole the time of day. I can’t emphasize this enough. Your friends and family should be able to be honest with you about the person you’re dating and anyone that’s in your life. They should feel comfortable being honest with you and telling you how they feel. They shouldn’t have to hid the worst parts of them in order to protect you or so that you can be happy. I also don’t get how anyone can ship Meredith and DeLuca together or want him to continue to be a part of her life when he treats the people she loves so horribly and they openly detest him so much.

I’m sorry we have to wait so long to find out what happens next to our heroes. But I am very much looking forward to next season and watching Meredith and Hayes develop further!

Until next time!

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percywinchester27 · 4 years ago

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@caughtaghostsomehow I’m just going to put it all underneath the keep reading, picking things from all of those reblogs cause why not!

Part 27:

I understand why Max trusts Sam so much... Even after he initially failed him, he still kept his promise later on and he's been keeping it since.

The scene when Sam finds Max in the cell... Oh man.. I was angry at first, just like Sam but then my heart broke for this little boy. Sam and him needed each other. I think they may be soulmates.. The universe destined them to help each other out.

Yep. The reason why Sam is just so insanely careful about Max is because he how what it feels like to almost lose him. And the prison scene changed a lot since it was conceived. But I knew I wanted Max to start out as a physical kid and then grow out of it. He and Sam really were destined.

I'm so glad we got to see how Jody found out about the whole situation and I just love her more after finding out that she helped with the adoption (by the way, I love how thorough your research is 🧡).

I knew Dean would never give up on his brother but it just made me really emotional when he kept calling and Sam finally picked up and the first words out of Dean's mouth were "are you alright?". It got to me for some reason...

I thought it was logical to go to her for a lot of reasons- cause she is a legal writings professor, a close friend AND has experience with adoption as a single parent in the very same state.

Awww... all the Dean parts get me. ALL of them. Especially here because they are so far and in-between in this story.

But Sam wanted his wife to trust him the same way. Unconditionally. He wanted her to trust him with fixing their life, dealing with their loss and grief and wanted her to trust him with rebuilding their life from before the accident.

This is you using my braincells by the way. Cause later on, someone points this EXACT same thing to the reader

I know I've said this before but it just keeps coming back to this in my head, she knew things couldn't be fixed because as much as she probably trusted Sam with her life, she understands that some things just aren't in anyone's control... And Sam wanted her to believe he could mend the wounds all by himself... It's sad and frustrating but I can't wait for them to have this conversation

I know you’ve read part 30 already and you know they touch on this very very briefly but they don’t really resolve this. It gets addressed specifically eventually. His ‘i could fix us’ vs. her ‘I knew you couldn’t.’ Does such for them though.

Chapter 28

Why do I have a bad feeling about that party?

Because. Same. Braincells. Lol.

I really wanted for someone to say that and Sam certainly needed to hear it and I'm so glad it was Chase who opened his eyes about this. He's absolutely right too, let the woman speak for her damn self instead of assuming how she feels.

Chase was me! Yelling at all these characters for not fucking listening to me haha... remember how I told you that people were suspicious of Chase? Yeah, after this chapter, everyone’s kinda adopted him.

My emotions have been all over the place lately anyway but reading how Sam needed to compose himself before speaking about his son's death... I swear I don't have tears in my eyes while typing this- that was hard to read.

I'm glad Max knows... I don't know how much of it he understands but he's a clever boy, I'm sure he has at least a little bit better of an idea why this situation is so delicate.

Awww I’m so sorry I made you cry :/ But, well... Sam doesn’t grieve his son’s death the way the reader does. He’s always been more stoic. Besides, he had to deal with two griefs back then not just one... but I am sure it still hurts too much.

I’ve left it to everyone’s imagination how much Max understands. He knows the concept of death for sure.... but his birth father had orgies at his house. We can all only hope that Max is completely shielded from that since he was using to hiding in closets when there were strangers in the house.

I was surprised by his question too but Sam's response was so... Loving. My heart can't take this.. He's such a great father...

Yep. I mean how else could he have reassured Max? His no lying policy is a great way to raise a child tbh. My sister does that with my nephew. That’s how I know.

Chapter 29

I really like Maddie, she's a genuinely sweet person, I love how helpful she tries to be and that she honestly wants her friend to be happy. I wonder what exactly went wrong during that party for her to look so dejected...

Maddie is nice. I was hellbent on making all of Sam’s canon Exes nice in this series. Cause I’ve had enough of reading the evil ex and current gf pitted against each other trope (Though I’ve never written it myself. Maybe I should and see for myself why it is so alluring lol.) I don’t know, maybe it was little a double prank thingy? Throw the reader in the water and be as mean to Madison as you can?

I really fucking hope that Brad gets what he deserves and that is to be kicked in the balls. Ever fucking heard the word boundary? Consent? I hate people like him with a burning passion and that whole situation infuriated and scared me in equal measure.

Yeah. That asshole needs to go down! His endgame has changed more than anyone elses in the story lol.

The fact that all of it came back to her the instant she hit the water made me sob. She wanted to protect her baby but there was no one there... I just- oh fuck.

Kay that part was HARD to write. All of it. Poor reader!

Was Sam the one to pull her out? If so then I don't even want to think about what would happen if he wasn't there, if they haven't made plans...

The way she started crying for their baby when she found her breath again made me cry even more... I don't know why I feel such a strong connection to this story and characters but I don't want them to ever feel pain like that again. It's heartbreaking 💔

Yeah that was Sam... I mean the pool was visible and all that. I mean of course you know. You read the next chapter. Why am I being a dumbass :/

Something had to trigger her trauma. It wasn’t going to come out on its own and And Sam loves her too much to force her to grieve. He barely held it together when she did grieve so well...

PS.: I'm really sorry you experienced drowning, it's a horrible thing to go through. I don't do pools- or really, any body of water, either. There's just something about the idea of drowning that unsettles me more than I can express.

Yeahh... God bless that lifeguard. Seriously. He’s the only one who noticed that I wasn’t coming up. It was night time and the pool was pretty dark so. I am so sorry that you don’t like pools, either. It’s terrifying.

Chapter 30

Firstly, Ria, you’re TOO GOOD to me, seriously! The fact that I could have you speechless is about the biggest complement you could’ve given me.

If you can call it that and at first when she asked him about the ring, I was surprised but my heart just sunk. I don't think either of them were in the right, I don't think they were both wrong either... I don't believe I'm good enough with problem solving to know what advice I'd give them but I do know that I have never experienced a feeling more cathartic than this one when reading. Twenty nine chapters leading to this moment... All the questions and pining and heartbreak. .. And sure, there's so much more they could say and there's so much more you talk about and figure out but as of right now... This is the beginning of the rest of their lives.

So, I think what she meant to ask was why did he just not give up on her, but she was tired and spontaneous and the ring question just tumbled out instead. I tried so hard for all their conversations to sound spontaneous and not rehearsed you know? Where they ended up touching on every aspect of the past? Cause that wouldn’t happen. It just wouldn’t.

And THANK YOU for saying that. I swear to God, this chapter wouldn’t have made that impact if it hadn’t had a backing of 29 chapters. It would have royally fallen flat. Everyone was invested in the story by now and I was counting on it.

I didn't like how Sam got angry at first because I put myself in her shoes but the truth is, someone needed to get angry about something. One of them had to feel some type of overwhelming emotion to get here and it just so happened that it started with pain and landed on anger.

This is and SPN finale type of dilemma though. Like for the writers, they had to Kill of Dean first cause only Sam had the slight ability to move on. Sam way, I didn’t think the reader would have ever gotten angry first. She is so burdened by her own guilt (undeserved tbh) but she wouldn’t just lash out first. Sam had been angry at the start of the series and absolutely livid in their time apart. I just thought it would be easier for him to get mad first. Not defending his choices or whatever, just why I chose to make that decision as a writer. I would have been plenty mad a reader, too.

But the way they got angry wasn't a bad thing, their anger was based in how much they care about each other. Like the anger I would feel when one of my dogs ran just a little too far from me and a car was coming - took like fifteen fucking years off my ife istg. But I wasn't angry and screaming at them to make them feel bad, I was angry because I was so fucking scared that they would get hurt. The anger wasn't based in resentment, it was based in love. It's the same here and you can see it.

Jesus, I’m so sorry that happened with one of your dogs. Seriously. That sounds scary AF. I’m glad your dogs are okay.

Their anger isn’t destructive. It just isn’t. That much I’m pretty sure of. They’ve dealt with so much shit, and truly love each too much to actually hurt one another with words at this point. And it’s a good 10 chapters of journey where they deal with one issue after another to effing solve it like adults and not teenagers in throes of passion. I was like, nope! Not doing the passionate way. These two don’t get to be smart enough to get into Stanford and then be dumb like that and scream and yell and be jealous or irrational. It added a few chapters, but if I can be patient, so can be everyone else :P

The story she told about the cactus was not only a brilliant way to show her mindset and how people saw her over the years but also so fucking heartbreaking. On one hand you have this coworker who saw her and thought, "that person needs something low maintenance if they can care for something at all" and on the other - you've got this woman who tries her best to nurture this plant and help it grow and it ends up dying anyway.

That cactus one is inspired by real life event. And it seriously broke my heart to go through. Hoping each day that the last pod might live through :/ Like you said her co-worker wasn’t being mean, but it sucks that the cactus died anyway :(

Girl, you made my morning today. I woke up to your love and I just... you had me speechless. That chapter took a lot out of our branicells and I rewrote it so many times just to get it right for it to be respectful, vulnerable and cathartic at the same time.

But may I ask you, WHY YOU WERE UP TILL 5:30 in the morning to read it? I have a timestamp thingy going for me, okay? I knew what time it was over there! And you gave yourself a migraine crying? OMG! I am so so sorry :/ Gosh. If I knew, you were going to binge it straight, I’d have warned you!

Seriously, Ria! Thank you seems like a small phrase. I will tell you this, I love you! So much!

#Ana replies #Ana loves Ria #seriously you make my work look nicer and more deep than it is #sincerely humbled by this #can't word the gratitude right #q

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vgckwb · 5 years ago

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ML: Isolation Chapter 13: No Boundaries

After school ended, Nino looked at his phone and sighed deeply. Adrien noticed this. He put his arm around his friend. “What’s up?” he asked.

Nino looked at him with a smile. He sighed. “It’s complicated,” he told him. “My boss wants me to come in early today for an all-staff meeting.”

Adrien seemed confused. “So, what’s the problem?” he asked.

“Well, I was supposed to watch my little brother until my mom gets back from work” Nino answered. Nino got another alert. “And he’s here now. I’m just going to have to walk him over to the after school care building.”

“I can watch him,” Adrien offered.

“Oh no,” Nino said. “It’s not that I don’t trust you, but you’re still getting used to regular humans. No way am I going to unleash a little monster on you.”

“Why not? I like Fred Savage” Adrien replied.

“Huh? What are you talking about?” Nino asked.

“Oh yeah. I guess you wouldn’t get that reference” Adrien said. Nino looked at him confused. “See, there’s this old movie called ‘Little Monsters’ and it stars Fred Savage” he explained. Nino still seemed clueless. “Just one of the many benefits of growing up alone.”

Nino hugged Adrien. “It’s OK dude” He said. He stopped hugging him. “Maybe you can invite me over and we can watch it together.”

“That’s OK,” Adrien said. “It’s...not that great…”

“Even better,” Nino said. “We could totally MST3K it then!”

“Wait, you know about MST3K?” Adrien asked.

“Well, from the revival” Nino said. “But my mom did show me some of the classics afterwards.”

“I see,” Adrien said.

Nino got another alert. “Oh crap, it’s Chris. He’s probably getting impatient. We’ll continue this another time.” Adrien and Nino walked out.

When they got to the front of the school, Chris spotted them immediately. “Where were you?!” he demanded.

“Sorry Chris,” Nino said. “I was just talking to my new bro, Adrien.”

“It’s OK,” said a voice. Adrien turned to see that it was Lila. “I saw him waiting here and figured you were a little busy.”

“Oh, thanks Lila,” Nino said.

“So, where are we going today?!” Chris asked, excitedly.

Nino looked downtrodden. “Sorry Chris. But I got called into work early today. You’re going to have to go to after school care.”

Chris got grumpy. “You ALWAYS do this!” he yelled.

“Sorry” Nino said. “I can’t help it.”

Chris continues to simmer in anger. “Now now” Lila said. “It’s not like he WANTED to do this. He’s just busy is all.” Chris groaned. “He’s doing this to help you all out, right?”

Chris’s anger gave out. “Yeah. You’re right” he relented. “I was just so excited about today.”

Nino smiled. “I’ll make it up to you some other time,” he said. “I promise.”

“Well, if you promise…” Chris said.

“Alright then. Let’s go!” Nino said.

“Right,” Chris said. He turned to Lila. “Oh Uh, thanks for helping me out with my problem.”

Lila smiled. “It’s quite alright.” Adrien didn’t quite like that look on her face.

“Come on Chris,” Nino said. “I don’t want to be late.”

“Coming!” Chris said. He rushed to his brother.

Adrien smiled. “I’ll join you,” he said.

“It’s fine,” Nino said.

“I insist,” Adrin said.

“Well, suit yourself,” Nino said. The three of them started walking together. Nino looked at Chris. “By the way, what did Lila help you with?”

“Oh. I was just wondering how to deal with a bad person” Chris said.

“I see,” Nino said. “Well, if she did that, I gotta thank her the next time I see her.”

Adiren grew lost in thought. Is this person bad? I mean, it IS Lila we’re talking about here. Then again, a broken clock is right twice a day. Besides, Lila does have to keep up the appearance of being nice. So she might do some good things.

The three of them arrived at the care center. “Here we are,” Nino said. “I gotta check Chris in, and then it’s off to work.” Adrien nodded. “Let’s go.” He took Chris in.

Adrien waited outside. He saw someone walk out. Nadja Chamack. It was then that an awful thought occurred. Could that bad person be…? It can’t be, right? He thought it over some more. Chris never specified who this “bad person” was, if anyone specific. Still, Chris is a bit rambunctious, and Lila would do a lot to hurt Marinette. But would she go this far? He looked at the building. I can’t risk it not being an option.

Nino came out. “OK. He’s all set. Let’s go.”

“Actually Nino, something just came up on my end” Adrien said. “You go on ahead. I don’t want to keep you from work.”

Nino seemed confused, but said “Well, OK. I’m going to make it up to you as well.”

Adrien smiled. “I’ll hold you to it.” NIno ran off. Adrien raced off in a different direction soon after.

A little bit later, he was running towards the after school center as Cat Noir. If something were to happen... I hope I’m not too late! He kept running. He made his way to the outside area and saw his worst nightmares coming to fruition. Chris had backed Manon into a corner, and he looked serious. He made a mad dash and hopped the fence. “Woah woah woah!” he said, modulator on. “What’s going on here?”

The two kids stopped in shock and looked at Adrien. “Cat Noir?” Chris said. Manon rushed to hide behind Adrien. “What are you doing here?”

“Isn’t it obvious?!” Manon said. “He’s here to protect me!”

“But how?” Chris said. “How would he know to protect you.”

“Because he and I have a special connection!” Manon argued.

Kids do have such an imagination Adrien thought.

Chris hissed. “Well, you’re only protecting a bad person!” he yelled. He made a motion to crack his knuckles, but they didn’t actually crack.

Adrien panicked. “Settle down Chris.”

Chris stopped and stared at him in awe. “How do you know my name?”

“Well, uh…” Adrien said. I messed up.

“Duh!” Manon said. “It’s GOT to be one of his superpowers. He could probably tell you the name of anyone here.”

Thanks Manon.

“Really…” Chris said sceptically. He looked around and pointed at another young girl. “What’s her name?”

Adrien was nervous. He decided to try and make a joke of it. “...Jean?”

Chris looked at him. “Wow. You really DO have super powers!”

That worked?!

Chris glared back at Manon. “But that doesn’t change the fact that she’s bad!”

“Woah woah woah woah woah” Adrien said, trying to calm Chris. “What makes you so sure she’s bad?”

“She’s protecting someone bad!” Chris argued.

I knew it. “Who is she protecting?”

“Our old babysitter,” Chris said.

So. Marinette babysat for Chris too. I guess that makes sense.

“Marinette didn’t do anything wrong!” Manon shouted.

“She bullied someone so much she made her cry for a day!” Chris fired back.

“SHE DID NOT!” Manon scrambled.

“OK OK, calm down,” Adrien said. “Let’s just think here. Now Chris,” Chris looked at him, “whether or not she did do that, is what you’re doing an appropriate response?”

Chris looked at his hand. “Well, she’s a bad guy! And bad guys need to be defeated!”

“From the sounds of it, it’s this babysitter that you say is bad,” Adrien said. “Did Manon bully that person?”

“Well, no…” Chris said. “But she’s supporting her!”

“But she’s not hurting anyone, is she?” Adrien asked.

Chris thought about it. “Well, I just talked with her. The girl that got bullied, I mean. She said that whenever someone praises our old babysitter, she can’t help but feel pain.”

Adrien looked serious. “I know how hard it is to deal with something like that,” he said, “but is this going to help her?”

Chris seemed frustrated. “I thought if I could punish evil, I’d be a hero. Like you.”

“Corning someone and intimidating them doesn’t sound like a hero now, does it?” Adrien asked. Chris finally relented and shook his head. Adrien smiled. “There you go.”

Chris smiled back. “Thank you. For stopping me.” He looked off.

“What’s wrong?” Adrien asked.

“I was just thinking” Chris said. “If you had been around earlier, you could have stopped the bully.”

“She’s NOT a bully!” Manon shouted.

“HEY!” said one of the care center employees.

Adrien looked alert. “Well, I better let them finish helping you out. Seeya!” he saluted and ran off.

Once he got home, he contacted Marinette. “Hey. Something happened.”

“What?” Marinette asked.

Adrien sighed. “Lila crossed a line.”

“!! What did she do?”

“She manipulated Nino’s little bother Chris to attack Manon.”

“!!”

“Don’t worry. I stepped in before it got too far.” No response. “I had to leave because one of the supervisors came out. But I think I got through to Chris.” Still nothing. “Are you OK?”

“OK.”

“OK what?”

“I’ve made a decision. If it’s for the purposes of defeating Lila, you can tell people who I am.”

“Really?!” Adrien replied.

“Yes.”

“So, anyone as long as they’re helping me defeat Lila? Even if by chance that person was Chloe?”

“I don’t care. Lila’s mad at me? That’s fine. She wants to destroy my parents? They can defend themselves. But Manon? Manon is completely defenseless. What kind of person would I be if I just let Lila trample all over her life before it can even truly begin? I have a means of dealing with her, so I need to take it before something even worse happens.”

Adrien smiled rebelliously. “I can see why Manon really likes you.”

“So you’re going to tell Chloe?”

“Well, and Kagami. She’s already been helping me out a little.”

“That’s fine. ANYTHING to expose Lila.”

“On your command, my lady. It might take a bit of time, since Chloe can be a tough nut to crack sometimes. Also, I want to see how things play out with Chris.”

“Understandable. Thank you for saving Manon.”

“It’s what a hero does.”

“He he. Goodnight Adrien.”

“Goodnight.”

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous ladybug fanfic #adrien #nino #chris #lila #Manon #Marinette #no kwami #NICE GABRIEL

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7-wonders · 6 years ago

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Naked & Afraid

Summary: You finally (unwillingly, like everything else that’s happened to you since that night in the parking lot) meet your father-in-law in what is arguably some of the weirdest circumstances you’ve ever dealt with.

Word Count: 3734

A/N: What, Claire finally updated Mad Love? Hell must’ve frozen over and pigs are surely flying! Feedback is always appreciated (even the h8ers; bring it on hunny I’m always up for a throwdown), and if you liked this chapter I would love if you would reblog and/or leave me a comment!

Every single thing about Michael Langdon and the life that he lives is the epitome of luxury, so it comes as no surprise that the en suite bathroom that has been deemed yours is just as opulent as everything else you’ve seen. After an incredibly long week that’s seemed to stretch for months, the large, ornate bathtub is the only thing on your mind. After Michael cut dinner short tonight, an issue with the Cooperative requiring his attention, you found yourself sitting on your bed and trying to figure out what to do with an unexpected free evening. Your head is still spinning after everything that’s happened in the past couple of days, and a long bath is where you tend to do your best thinking and decompressing. Today, especially, there’s a lot to think about.

The sound of rushing water fills the bathroom and echoes off of the large granite walls (who has granite walls?). Sticking your hand under the steady stream, you fiddle with the knob for a few moments before finding your ideal temperature. The bathtub starts to fill quickly, and you pour a generous amount of some fragrant lavender bubble bath into the water. You sit back on the balls of your feet, waiting for the bath to fill to your desired depth before rushing to turn it off. Glancing one last time to make sure you remembered to lock the door, you yank your clothes off of your body before sinking into the bath.

You sigh audibly once the hot water covers your body, the heat immediately going to work at relaxing your muscles. Relaxing against the back of the porcelain tub, you turn your phone on to play some music and stare up at the ceiling. There’s a chandelier, because of course there is. Although the signature black is prevalent throughout the room, you’re pleased to see some accents of purple and silver as well. Your thoughts, which can never just remain on one topic for an extended period of time, quickly shift to what’s happened yesterday and today.

The major thing is, of course, the kiss that you shared with Michael mere hours ago. More specifically, why the hell did you reciprocate the kiss? He certainly didn’t use his magic on you; even if you didn’t know what magic felt like when it was used on you now, the stern warning that you would beat his ass scared him enough to not even consider it. But, it’s not as if you like him. At best, you’re starting to tolerate him. That doesn’t mean you’ve ever thought about kissing him before, no matter how soft his lips actually are.

Maybe it was a lapse in judgement? Or maybe drunk (Y/N) was still lurking in the darkest recesses of your mind, just waiting for a moment to come out and screw everything up. A single kiss does not equal attraction of any kind. Michael’s arrogant, nosy, doesn’t understand boundaries, is the literal Antichrist and, to top it off, kidnapped you to be his unwilling bride. But at the same time, he obviously didn’t have a very loving or normal childhood, and he’s been used as a puppet by so many: Ms. Mead, the Satanists, his father. You don’t empathize with him, or even excuse his actions due to what he’s gone through. You do, however, understand why he acts the way that he does; maybe that makes all the difference.

You don’t remember falling asleep, but it’s obvious that you did. One moment, you’re relaxing in a bathtub and pondering how weird your life has gotten, and then you blink and you’re here. Well, wherever ‘here’ is. Everything’s dark, as if you’re standing outside in an empty field with no sign of stars, the moon, or any lights. Your eyes take a minute to adjust, but even then you’re still unable to see any sign of life. Although you can’t see anything, you can feel that something, or someone, is here with you.

The hair on your arms prickles, goosebumps rising as you feel a pair of piercing eyes watching you. The worst part, though, is that you can’t tell which direction they’re looking at you from. Just when you turn around to try and catch them, the feeling’s from behind you. It’s everywhere: Your back, your arms, your side, your face. At times it feels like you’re nose to nose with this entity, even though there’s nothing there. Your breathing picks up, nervously coming out in visible puffs as you wrap your arms around yourself. Looking down suddenly, you’re grateful that you’re not still naked in this dream (or vision, or premonition). You’re wearing the same clothes that you were wearing earlier today, almost as if you had dressed yourself while asleep.

As far as you can tell, you’re alone. That is, until you’re not. You spin around in a slow circle one last time, shrieking loudly when you come face to face with a man. A small smile has his pink lips upturned, showing his amusement at your fear. He’s tall, tall enough that his neck is bent in order to look at you. His unruly black hair somehow manages to look like he styled it that way, and his hazel eyes seem to flicker and crackle with sparks. You stumble backwards, desperate to put some space between you and this stranger. He closes his eyes and breathes deeply, reminding you of how Michael looks when he smells your fear in the air.

“Who are you?” Your voice, although you attempt to sound strong, comes out shaky and hesitant.

“I am known by many different names, and I possess many different faces.” He quips, taking one long step closer to you. “Mmm, but of course you would not recognize me as I am now, right, sweet (Y/N)?”

“How do you know my name?”

He doesn’t answer. In a split second, he’s changed from the man with the mop of black hair to a tall man with brown hair and brown eyes, a trimmed beard on his face. If it weren’t for the same sparks in his eyes, you would have thought it was a completely different person.

“Does this not work for you, either?” His form changes again, to that of a teenage boy in an ill-fitting sweater and ratty jeans. His blond hair hasn’t been combed in a while, but he has the same brown eyes as that of the man before him.

“Stop doing this!” You snap, half-tempted to smack him.

“Oh, but I think you will quite enjoy this next form.” Suddenly, Michael stands before you. It looks just like the Michael you know, except for those eyes. Michael’s eyes, the real Michael’s eyes, lack that odd flame in them that this person has.

“Change back.” You say through gritted teeth. You’re not sure why the sight of him makes you feel so odd, but it does.

“You are no fun at all.” He sighs, reverting back to the original form that you first saw him in.

“I’m going to ask you this one more time. Who. Are. You?” Your hands are balled into fists at your sides, and you can feel your nails digging into the calloused flesh there.

“‘The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.’” He quips. It sounds familiar, what he’s saying, but you have no clue where you would have heard something like this before. “Why did you react the way that you did when I assumed the image of my son?”

“Your son? Who’s your…” You trail off upon realizing the only person that he could possibly be referring to as his son. He smirks, knowing that you’re hoping with every fiber of your being that he’s not who you think he is.

“Such a smart woman you are, (Y/N).” His voice drips with the same saccharine that tempted Eve when she stood at that lonely tree in the Garden of Eden, listening to the lies of the serpent as he whispered in her ear that the Forbidden Fruit would provide her the same knowledge that God himself possessed. “Surely you have heard some of my names. Beelzebub, Mephistopheles, Lucifer--” he cuts himself off, and the grin that he shoots your way has you shuddering at the mere sight of it, “--Satan.”

“You can’t be, I--how am I here?” There’s so much about this situation that’s wrong, but for some reason your mind latches onto the sheer absurdity of waking up in an actual hellscape.

“My dear, I’m the Devil. A mere parlor trick is all it took to get you into my domain.” He spreads his arms wide, proud of the desolate landscape that stretches ahead for miles and miles.

“I’m not your ‘dear.’” You retort, eyes widening when you realize that you just sassed Satan himself. Instead of stealing your soul and banishing you to the Ninth Circle of Hell, which is what you’re expecting, he stares at you for a moment before laughing loudly.

“See, everytime I think that I chose the wrong mortal to be my son’s companion, you prove to me that I made the correct choice.” He seems proud of himself, standing tall and with his chest out.

“You ruined my life with your ‘choice.’”

Satan’s face falls, and he takes another step closer to you. “I have given you the opportunity to be great!”

“You stole my free will!”

“Thanks to me, you will rule the New World side-by-side with Michael. You are the missing link to bring about our plans for the Apocalypse. My son, as I am sure you have noticed, is all too human. I blame his mother; gentle, impassioned Vivien did not pass many things down to Michael, but she did manage to give the boy an overly caring heart. He needs someone to fulfill his heart’s desires, and who better than the one who was handpicked for him?”

“The Apocalypse,” you scoff, choosing to ignore the last part of his spiel for now as you look the Devil right in the eyes. “Why do you even want to bring about the Apocalypse? Once everyone’s dead, there’s no more new souls for you to torture.”

“Hell is not just made up of the souls of the damned, (Y/N). Legions of demons, swarms of locusts and scorpions, plagues that mankind has long since forgotten. My domain shall no longer be restricted just to Hell. Instead, Hell, and all of her beasts, will wreak havoc upon the Earth.”

“You want to kill billions of people, just so that you and your buddies can get your jollies?”

“Chaos and disorder are what keeps the world running. I am merely trying to make sure that only those who can survive the most chaotic of situations will populate the New World. Which, might I remind you, you shall have a hand in ruling.”

“I don’t want your fucking crown or kingdom.”

You go to whirl around, hoping that there will be some door that you missed when you first woke up here, but you’re faced again with Satan. When you try to back away from him, a ring of flames encircles both of you, effectively trapping you with him. He snatches your wrist, and your eyes widen at the sharp talons digging into your skin.

“Did your mother never teach you that gratitude is a virtue?” His voice comes out as a thunder, shaking the very ground that you stand on.

You really should tone down the sass and backtalk, but you can’t help it when a man as arrogant as any you’ve ever met stands mere inches away. “That’s really rich, coming from the literal Devil.”

“You foolish, insolent little girl. You have no idea what I am capable of.”

Your heart pounds in your chest as he loosens his grip on your wrist, allowing you to snatch your extremity back from him. You rub the skin, visibly marked and bleeding in areas where the talons pierced through, as gently as possible while trying to gain some feeling back into your tingling hand.

“I embody the seven deadly sins,” he continues. “I can become your greatest desire…”

You haven’t been looking at him while attending to your wrist, but your movements stop at the sudden change of voice when he reaches the end of his sentence. Moving your eyes slowly upwards, you let out a harsh breath when you’re greeted with Michael’s smirking face. The Michael doppelgänger slowly walks towards you, lifting a chilly hand up to your face and caressing your cheek.

“Don’t touch me.” You mutter, unable to look away from his cerulean eyes.

“C’mon, (Y/N),” even his mocking tone sounds just like the Michael that you know, “don’t play coy with me. I can see into the deepest parts of your soul. That purity that you try so furiously to embody, tinted black in some areas. You desire me, even though you hate to admit it.”

“I don’t.”

“Liar.” He whispers, breath ghosting across your face while he moves even closer to yours. “The very essence of your being calls out for me, just as I call out for you. We were created for each other. No matter how much you try and fight it, we belong to each other. Soon enough, your mind will give into what your soul already knows.”

“Stop it!” You shout, shoving him away from you.

Satan goes stumbling back, caught off-guard by your sudden attack and nearly topping into the flames. When he rights himself again, he has a devil’s grin plastered across his original face.

“As I was saying, I can become your greatest desire, but I can also transform into your worst nightmare.”

He starts to shift and change, body convulsing as bones grow from out of nowhere. Satan’s no longer a man, although was the title of ‘man’ ever one that could be bestowed upon him? Instead, he’s a horrific, imposing creature with multiple heads that almost looks like some sort of dragon.

“‘And I saw a beast coming out of the sea,’” he bellows, all of the heads combining their voices to form a roar that has you clapping your hands over your ears. “‘It had ten horns and seven heads, with ten crowns on its horns, and on each head a blasphemous name.’”

Vaguely, you realize that the heads are quoting some part of the Book of Revelation, but you don’t have time to wonder about if the Devil has the Bible memorized when the heads of the beast unhinge their jaws, showing off their gaping maws and the dim glow of fire being conjured from deep in their belly. As the heads start to lower towards you, you drop to your knees and let out a blood curdling shriek.

Michael senses your panic before he hears your terrified screams. He springs up from his plush leather chair in his office, abruptly ending the phone call he was just on with a couple of world leaders. Your screams permeate the air, Michael’s heart pounding in terror at what you could possibly be experiencing right now. In his mind, there’s no time to waste. He blasts the bathroom door open the moment that it comes into view, hoping that you’ll forgive him for barging in on you while you’re nude.

Your subconscious, which Satan had pulled into Hell the moment your eyes slipped closed for longer than a second, had jolted back into your body upon sensing your imminent demise. In your panic, you had slipped under the water, inhaling mouthfuls of it as your lungs tried to breathe normally again. Your hands cling to the lip of the tub, almost like you’re worried that something will swim up from the depths of the bath and attempt to drag you back under. Alternating between screaming and coughing up the water that has invaded your lungs, your eyes remain clenched tight.

Michael reaches for you before his mind can start to think about the repercussions of doing so, arms slipping under your body and pulling you out of the water. His suit is soaking wet now, but he doesn’t care. He’s never seen you like this before, so terror-stricken that you can’t even open your eyes, and it shakes him to his core. You thrash against his firm chest, sure that Satan has shifted back and captured you in hell. It’s only when you hear his frantically calm reassurances that your body stops writhing.

“Hey, you’re okay, it’s fine. I’m here, nothing can hurt you.” He soothes you, waiting patiently for your eyes to flutter open.

“Michael? It’s...it’s actually you, right?” Your voice is meek in a way that he’s never heard before.

“Why wouldn’t it be me?” Your eyes fill with tears at the memory, and you shake your head before burying your face in his chest, sobs wracking your body. “What happened to you?”

The only sounds you make are the small whimpers that slip past the barrier of your mouth, floating to Michael’s ears. His fingers go to your back, freezing when he remembers that you’re naked. Hesitantly, he grabs a towel and wraps you in it, though you’re still too shocked to even care. Michael holds you tightly against him, rubbing circles on your back and listening to your heart to make sure it evens out. It takes a while, but it slowly manages to go to a rate that wouldn’t have an Apple Watch alerting its owner of a possible heart attack.

“(Y/N), is it okay if I get you dressed?” If your head wasn’t pressed against his chest, he wouldn’t even be aware that you had nodded in response to his request, the movement was so small.

Michael can tell that the steady metronome of his heart is calming to you, so he remains silent while he runs another towel through your hair. He’s gentle with you, almost like you’re a wisp of smoke he’s managed to capture in his hands; one wrong movement, and you’ll disappear. He helps to tug the black nightdress over your head, looking up at the ceiling while he inches it down past your thighs until you’re modest. A wave of his bejeweled hand makes the bathtub start to drain, the sound of the water level receding helping to fill the silence of the bathroom.

You’re exhausted, although you’re not sure if it’s from the near-drowning that still has your lungs feeling like they’re burning or the fact that Satan literally had you in Hell with him. When Michael picks you up in his arms, you don’t even bother to protest what he’s doing. The covers of your bed have already been turned down, likely the work of a maid slipping in while you were first in the bathroom. Michael sets you down amongst the plush pillows and starts to pull the blankets up around you, but stops when you grab his hand.

“It was Satan.” You mutter, tired eyes gazing up to see his panicked reaction.

“What?”

“Lay down with me.” Patting the spot on the bed next to you, Michael slowly slips his shoes off before sliding in next to you. You smile slightly at how he still respects your space, fingers just barely brushing against yours in an effort to not piss you off. “I must have fallen asleep while I was taking a bath. It felt like I only blinked, and suddenly I was in this pitch black landscape…”

You tell him everything about the confrontation with his father, only leaving out the part where Satan accused Michael of being your greatest desire. He listens intently throughout your entire story, saving all of his comments for after you’re finished.

“Why did he show himself to you?” Michael mutters, almost as if he’s talking to himself.

“Does he normally not do that?”

“I’ve never actually seen him before. My father has an...odd way of communicating with me, and that usually involves some sort of visions or rituals. I don’t understand why you’re--” he cuts himself off, jaw tightening while he lets out a sigh. “--he’s not pleased with either of us.”

“He couldn’t just have a friendly conversation with you instead of dragging me to Hell?”

“This was intended to be a message that would resonate with both of us. Would you have taken me seriously if he had spoken to me during a ritual?”

“You already know I wouldn’t.”

“Then what better way to voice his displeasure than by getting the skeptic, the unwilling second part of this equation, to be the messenger?”

“I don’t understand why he’s not pleased, though. I married you. Isn’t that enough?”

Michael grimaces. “You’re far more headstrong than he thought you would be. I think, when my father was picking a bride for me, he imagined that she would be this demure little thing who faithfully worshipped Satan and had already accrued a body count by her eighteenth birthday. You are almost the exact opposite of that, and it infuriates him. Any wrench in our plans means more time that’s wasted.”

“What you order on Amazon versus what shows up.” You joke, chuckling when Michael stifles a smile. “C’mon, that was funny!”

“It’s time for you to get some rest, (Y/N).” Michael reminds you, stroking your damp hair back from your face. His clothes are no longer wet, and you briefly wonder if he used his magic to dry them before nerves seize your stomach.

“Wait! Please don’t leave me.” You plead, gripping his arm tightly with both of yours. Michael looks concerned, and you sigh. “I’m scared that he’ll get me again if I fall asleep.”

Michael’s arms wrap around you, securing you against his chest. That steady rhythm that makes up his heartbeat starts to calm you again, and you use the sound to ground yourself.

“I won’t let him anywhere near you, I promise.” You can’t be too sure, considering how fast you drift off, but it feels like he lays a kiss to your forehead.

Michael keeps his promise, remaining with you until long after you’re asleep. When his own eyes start to slip closed, he allows himself to fall asleep next to you, protecting you no matter what.

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septembriseur · 5 years ago

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A comprehensive theory of The Terror, pt. V

Hickey.

Oh, Hickey.

Or should I say: not-Hickey?

Hickey is a man who, over the course of the series, undergoes a profound transformation. When we first meet him, he’s a sullen and fairly useless caulker’s mate whose clumsy manipulations always seem to go slightly awry— he mistakes Crozier’s eagerness to get sloshed as an overture of friendship; he deploys his awareness that the tuunbaq isn’t really an animal to an unimpressed panel of officers; his daring escapade to kidnap Silna gets him flogged. Yet by the end of the show, he’s become a kind of ragged, savage would-be prophet, an unstoppable and hardly-human consumer of other men.

The seeds of this are already present in his initial appearances. The first time we see Hickey as Hickey, rather than as one of a group of seamen, is when he helps to bury David Young in episode one. There is a miniature transformation that takes place here: at first, he’s a comic figure, flicking Tozer the V before hastily turning it into a thumbs-up, but when the other men leave him to work, he opts to climb down into Young’s grave. This is ostensibly so he can fix the broken lid of Young’s coffin, but in fact (we later learn) to rob Young’s corpse, and perhaps for some other, less articulable reason.

The scene in the grave is lit dramatically, which my terrible capping probably can’t really capture; there are several distinct moments at which the sun is positioned just above Hickey’s head, obliterating him like a particularly ruthless halo.

When it isn’t, he remains wreathed in a foggy light, or else struck by a sort of painterly chiaroscuro.

There’s something uncanny about the effect thus produced, particularly at the moment when Adam Nagaitis does a brilliant bit of physical acting: a lizard-like head-flick and lip-licking that will recur later, when Hickey kills Irving. It’s a gesture that looks wrong, at the same time as it communicates a kind of joy or a physical release.

Hickey wants to be in the grave, face-to-face with the dead body. I’m undecided how much he’s indifferent to any potential taboo— how much we should believe the casualness with which he later says, about the ring he steals from Young’s body, that he got it from “someone who didn’t need it anymore”— and how much it’s the very violation of that taboo that excites him, the touching-the-corpse and the going-down-into-the-grave. Either way, we know from this point on that he is someone whose nature is to transgress boundaries.

Sometimes that transgression is sympathetic! Why shouldn’t he get off with Billy belowdecks? He seems genuinely besotted with Billy, in a sort of feral, half-formed way. But the explanation he gives as to why Irving won’t inform on the two of them should raise red flags. Irving won’t say what he saw, Hickey says, because to do so would mean “he’d have to open his imagination to what he didn’t... That’s a man afraid of chaos. He’s not going to invite more if he can help it.”

Here, “order” becomes what is seen, and “chaos” what is not seen— not only what is not seen, but what cannot be seen without puncturing order. This is tremendously important, I think, because the grave scene above also features one of several moments in the show at which the camera deliberately does not follow Hickey, barring the audience from seeing what he sees.

This is what the audience sees while Hickey is actually in the process of rifling through Young’s corpse: a long, slow push in on the exterior of the grave. We hear Hickey’s noises of effort, but we don’t rejoin him until he’s slipped the ring into his pocket.

This is exactly the technique used in the scene in episode six where Hickey puts his fingers into Heather’s exposed brain. We see Hickey pull the “veil” back to expose Heather’s injury, then bend over his body to inspect him:

However, we then cut to an angle at which the camera is positioned behind the veil, watching Hickey’s face yet concealing his actions.

We hear the wet noises as he touches Heather’s brain, but the show has literally drawn a veil across his actions, preventing us from seeing them and allowing us to leave them unimagined. (There is, I must note, a grimly clever little cut from this scene to Jacko the monkey digging his fingers into a tin of food.)

This isn’t a show that shies away from gore. I mean, in the final episode, we get multiple straightforward shots of Goodsir’s naked, butchered, and partly-consumed corpse. So it seems significant that there are these moments when the camera specifically will not let us follow Hickey where he is going, as though it does not want to implicate us in his violation.

When I say violation, I don’t want to imply that these things are somehow inherently morally wrong. What they are is exactly what Hickey says: chaotic. (I should note that the scene in which Irving finds Hickey and Billy having sex draws on elements of this same pattern— we distinctly hear Hickey and Billy going at it, but don’t see them until they’re clothed— but everything about the way the show depicts not only their relationship but also that of Bridgens and Peglar suggests that we are meant to find these relationships tender and tragic, not unpleasant.) Hickey is, characteristically and centrally, chaotic. To paraphrase a wise man: he sees a boundary, he eats a boundary and washes it down with a cup of hot steaming rules. He’s a social transgressor, having sex with men and drinking with the captain. He’s a spatial transgressor: he sneaks back onto the ship during Franklin’s funeral and wanders through everyone’s private places, touching their intimate possessions. He takes a shit in Billy’s bed. There are other elements of confusion: he’s a man who’s “punished as a boy.” And, of course, deeper than all of these things runs the abiding formlessness at the heart of Hickey: he isn’t really Hickey. We never know who he is. He has no name, no past; he’s just someone who wandered onto the ship, looking for a “change of everything.”

We find this out about him in episode seven, the end of which marks the break between his nascent chaos and chaos unleashed. Something... happens to Hickey. In the scene that sees Irving return from his meeting with the Netsilik, Hickey is shot from angles and in poses that are designed to make him appear inhuman. First there’s this—

—a weird, disturbing shot in which Hickey is crouched, mostly naked, concealed under a greatcoat, and vaguely monstrous over Farr’s corpse. Then, as Irving approaches, Hickey springs animalistically at him, stabs him, and proceeds to squat over Irving and hold a hand over his mouth until he dies. We see Hickey through Irving’s eyes while this happens, at an unnatural angle that not only accentuates the sharp, triangular shapes of his body, but also seems to distort him slightly. He looks demonic, even before he repeats his restless and lizard-like head-flick...

And then: yikes.

It’s a shedding-his-skin motion, is what I think of that head-flick. From this point forward, Hickey is no longer a resentful man kicking against his confines. He has escaped those confines. He slips into an easy, ruthless, natural command of the mutineers, including men who outrank him and have previously mocked him.

He also slips further and further away from humanity, moving towards something else. “I’ve shot smaller hawks than you,” Jopson says, but Hickey isn’t a hawk, exactly. He looks like a man, albeit a man who’s mostly running around in his long underwear and a greatcoat in the Arctic, seemingly unable to feel the cold, but gradually all his previous strangenesses come to the fore. With a rope around his neck (once more lit strangely through a haze) he tells Crozier that he “must pierce this thing [Crozier] calls truth,” and takes on Crozier’s own voice/accent to do it— another absenting of identity, another piece of evidence that Hickey is not so much a person or a thing as a void of anything, a formlessness.

I can’t help but think that what the mutineers are following is not Hickey, but the formlessness that has broken free from within him. At the mutineers’ camp, Hickey takes on the demeanor and appearance of a prophet, embracing the air with his arms open (in the same pose that recurs throughout the series as an emblem of chaos and collapse) while skinned of most of his clothing—

—or meditating alone on hillsides for hours, “listening to his thoughts.” (“I dare not go up” to interrupt him, Tozer says.) He’s killed and eaten Billy by this point, and if we were looking for a logic to his actions, it would be possible to read it in the toast he reminds Crozier of: “Ourselves.” Crozier intended it as a self-deprecating joke, he says, but for Hickey it’s become a tenet: he is a wholly self-interested being whose principle is survival, a formlessness that wants to go on being a formlessness.

Yet he has contrived a strange plan that he doesn’t reveal to anyone, which rests on an observation that Crozier makes about him: “You must be a surpassingly lonely man, Mr. Hickey.” I’m not sure how sincere Crozier’s being in this moment; it’s pretty obvious he doesn’t agree that he and Hickey were each other’s only “equals” on the expedition. The observation is accurate, however, I think. Hickey is a surpassingly lonely man, but: “Not for long,” he tells Crozier. He plans to bind himself to the tuunbaq, becoming a shaman.

So let’s talk about this plan.

Hickey arranges this bizarre sacrificial tableau in which he stands atop the boat, again almost unclad in the middle of the Arctic, and rambles from what seems like a place of holy madness, cursing all the national and religious figures of England while offering what are pretty nakedly incisive truths. “What if we’re not the heroes?” he asks. “Our empire is not the only empire. I’ve seen that now.” Arguably, what allows him this vision is that he now stands outside of all the empires, having transcended every taboo, every boundary line.

Yet when he offers his tongue to the tuunbaq, the tuunbaq rejects it and eats him. The important question is: why?

Let me get philosophical for a second: what is a connection? It’s a point of contact between two beings, right? It’s a touch; the place where two parts of the world are joined to one another. For this to happen, there has to first be a dividing line; there has to be a way in which the world is divided up into things to start with. I am separate from you. Man is separate from animals. The sea is separate from the land. There are these boundaries in the world that allot us places; there are rules that govern how we relate to every other kind of thing. It’s not good or bad, any more than chaos is; it’s just order. And fundamentally there has to be an interplay; we always have to be moving towards a synthesis of order and chaos. But when you have just chaos, with no boundaries, then what you have is an everythingness that is also a nothingness, which is: Hickey. Everything is permitted, is his attitude, pretty explicitly; or alternatively: everything can be consumed, an act that literally treats everyone and everything around him as just a potential part of his body. The result of this is that it is impossible for him to connect.

When I was first trying to figure out why the tuunbaq refuses Hickey, I thought to myself: is it because Hickey thinks he’s the shaman, but he’s actually the monster? It’s possible to view him as “a spirit that dresses as an animal,” or as an animal that dresses as a man. But I think it’s that, at this point, Hickey has become so formless that he simply isn’t enough of a thing to be able to touch another thing. I think that’s the birthplace of the urge that drives him to to bind himself to the tuunbaq in the first place, but it’s also the reason why he can’t.

I find Hickey quite tragic, actually, because I can understand his frustration with order— with boundaries that are arbitrary and don’t seem to make sense. But in breaking and breaking and breaking forwards past those boundaries, Hickey fails to understand that the boundaries don’t exist to be boundaries qua boundaries. They create the possibility of relationship. And while touch is perhaps the push of chaos that nudges us to new and more perfect iterations of order, we can’t allow it to become the will to consume.

And on that note... next time, I have much to say about Goodsir.

#tv: terrible people #a comprehensive theory of the terror #the terror #terroramc #very long post #i don't think he's this important just because he's #the two degree murderous cannibal

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