#OTP: Words Unsaid

[demonsonthemoon]

A State or a Feeling

Fandom: Les Misérables Pairing: Jehan Prouvaire/Grantaire Word Count: 2155 Rating: Gen Summary: "I'm in love!" "And that's a good thing?" OR: Grantaire is so happy about his unrequited crush on Enjolras that he has to kiss Jehan about it. Notes: Happy meeting anniversary to my beloved friend @anastasiapullingteeth <3 Your friendship is a light in my life.

Read it on AO3.

Grantaire is giddy with it. Practically skipping as he walks home. Jehan would probably have given in to that instinct and cheerfully hopped down all the way back to their shared flat. He's a lot more comfortable in his skin that Grantaire is. He wouldn't care about people staring, wondering if maybe he's drunk, or high, instead of just this. Intoxicated and overjoyed by the simple act of loving.

Maybe Grantaire's a little drunk also, if he has to be entirely honest. But he's just walking, not skipping about, so it doesn't matter. It's not a problem. Right now, anyway.

There are many things in Grantaire's life that are a bit of a problem, but what is important is right now. And right now he's feeling giddy and happy, and he lets himself into his apartment, which always feels just a little bit like relief.

This is how Grantaire knows he's happy.

“Honey, I'm home!” He sing-songs, dropping his keys into a bowl in the hallway.

“In the kitchen,” Jehan shouts back. His voice is a little low, more rough-edged than usual.

Grantaire doesn't care about his lingering cold, though. He wraps his arms around the other man's waist and buries his smile into Jehan's neck, feeling like it might run away from him otherwise.

“Someone's in an amorous mood tonight,” Jehan says as Grantaire nuzzles under his skin. “You'll catch your death, you know.”

“What a beautiful way to go, though.”

“Well, you might have a deathwish, but I don't. And if you don't stop distracing me, this broccoli might just catch fire and take me with it into the afterlife.”

“The broccoli's already in the afterlife, you know.”

Jehan swats at him, then pokes his face with their wooden spoon until Grantaire relents and lets him go. “That is not the point and you know it,” Jehan adds, still threatening him with the spoon.

He quickly eases off though, relaxing and smiling. Grantaire can feel the same expression reflected on his face. “What's got you so happy?”

Grantaire can't resist. He swoops back in, lifts Jehan in his arms and twirls him around their kitchen. “I'm in love,” Grantaire says, grin growing bigger as Jehan starts to laugh.

“And that's a good thing?”

“Mmh-mmh.” Grantaire drops his flatmate back to the ground. Jehan turns around and switches off their gas hob. It fills Grantaire with a simple joy, because he knows that Jehan is truly listening to him. He is regularly shaken within his bones by the fact that someone can care about him so obviously, so easily, without making him feel inadequate. Grantaire stops to breathe, letting himself savor the feeling of his lungs being filled. It seems so easy, in this moment. What a precious thing. “I'm happy,” he whispers, like it's a secret.

Once again, he wonders at his luck, because Jehan knows to kiss him when he says that, tugging on Grantaire's hair slightly so that he bends down enough that Jehan can lick the joy from his lips.

“Tell me about it,” Jehan says, like a promise. Grantaire tugs him away from the kitchen, away from the broccoli. He's not hungry right now. He's filled to the core with euphoria.

He knows it's temporary, of course. It's just another high, like the ones he gets from drugs or from alcohol. But right now it's there, it's real, and that's all that matters. Being present in his body, and knowing that for once, he owes none of it to artificial substances.

“It's Enjolras,” Grantaire says as he settles on the tattered couch in their living room. Jehan settles down next to him, crossing his legs.

“Of course it is,” Jehan chuckles. “That's what I expected. Or, well, I guess there could have been a new recruit in Les Amis that caught your eye in a flash. After all, it happened to me.”

It's Grantaire's turn to reward Jehan with a kiss, a marker of the easy intimacy between them. It could so easily have turned out differently between them. Grantaire is very aware of how easily he could have been put off by Jehan's affection for him, if the other man hadn't been so good at respecting his boundaries. It's happened so many times before, that he felt a connection to someone, fell headfirst into adoration, before everything fizzled out once they started actually dating. It always felt uncomfortable, the cloying attention of someone being in love with him, the way that receprocation made a relationship change, stripped it of the playfulness that had made it interesting in the first place.

But here they are, he and Jehan. Living together, kissing each other, fucking each other when the mood strikes them. And yet it's not cloying. It's not laden with expectations and judgements.

It's not always easy. Hasn't always been easy. They've had to fight, for this. When they first got to know each other and the yearning felt so deep it threatened to consume them both, Grantaire had to push back against his own wants to try and protect what he truly needed. A friend. Foremost, front and center. A friend.

It's one of the hardest things he's ever done. It's definitely what he's the proudest of in his life.

Now he gets to have this. Like a reward. For once, Grantaire believes he deserves it.

“So, what did Enjolras do this time? Did he finally admit something nice about you?”

“Ah! We first need at least three signs of the Apocalypse before we can expect that. No, he called me a buffoon, I think. Hardly the insult he thinks it is. I do very much enjoy playing the entertainer.”

Jehan rolls his eyes at that. “Yeah, I think everyone in Les Amis has noticed that.”

“It's a great service I provide for them! I'm sure we would have lost half of our attendees if I didn't take it upon myself to make these meetings a little less rebarbative.”

“What you call rebarbative is known in some circles as efficient.”

“Psh.” Grantaire makes a gesture with his hand as if he's chasing a fly away. “We both know they like to talk in circle. If someone didn't push them towards a decision, they'd just spend all evening debating for the sake of it.”

“It's funny,” Jehan points out with a sly grin. “This almost makes it sound like you care about Les Amis achieving their goal.”

“You know I do,” Grantaire says, tone turning more somber. God, he hopes Jehan does, because if not... If not, there's been something going fundamentally wrong in this relationship, and Grantaire has only noticed. “I really do want you all to succeed, even if I don't-”

“I know. I know it's hard for you to believe that things can change, but it doesn't mean you don't think they should. I know that you care. The others know it too. They get mad at you for pushing, but they know it helps, that you're forcing them to think, forcing them to defend themselves, to step out of their comfort zone.” “Yeah. I mean, I also do it because it's fun to rile them up,” Grantaire adds, trying to salvage the situation before it devolves into The Sads Hour and he's forced to talk in excruciating details about his insecurities.

Jehan chuckles fondly. Grantaire feels seen. He's certain that his friend knows he diverted the conversation on purpose.

This is another thing that would scare him in any other person, but not in Jehan. Being known so intimately, being read for who he truly is and not just the lies he hides behind, it isn't an ordeal, when Jehan is the one doing the reading. Because, if his gaze his searching, it's never weakness that he's looking for. If he tries to pry Grantaire open, it's not to see what makes him tick, it's to be certain that Jehan will be able to put him back together again if the need arises.

“Fun. I've never been one to find shouting matches particularly appealing, but whatever does it for you. So, is that why you were in such a good mood? Because Enjolras called you an idiot and shouted at you?”

“A buffoon, he called me a buffoon. You of all people should know the importance of picking your words right.” Grantaire's smile turns a bit shy after that. “And yeah, that's pretty much what happened. It's just... remember how we had that entire conversation about how Enjolras doesn't actually hate me?”

That had been one of the times Grantaire had had to talk in excruciating details about his insecurities. It had been embarrassing, and painful for the both of them, but also absolutely necessary.

“He doesn't, by the way. Hate you.”

“I know. I know that now. Your arguments were very convincing. Also, I probably knew that all along. It's just that there's a big difference between knowing it intellectually and actually believing it, in your body. But we're not having that conversation again! Especially when I was trying to say that I do believe it now.”

Jehan raises an eyebrow at that, which is fair.

“I do! At least tonight. Because we were arguing, and he was calling me names, and then we got interrupted by one of the waitresses – you know the one that Joly and Bossuet both like? So obviously that took a while, and afterwards... The meeting just carried on. No barb. No cutting remarks. He could have said something to undermine me, like he used to do. But he didn't. It was like he didn't care. Except obviously he does, since we spent so long arguing right before that. But I just realised that... this is it.”

“It?”

Precious Jehan, trying to follow along even though Grantaire isn't making one bit of sense.

“Yeah. This is it. Enjolras and me. That stupid attraction I feel? This is where it's going, but not any further. He doesn't give a single fuck about it going any further, Jehan. It's amazing.”

Jehan laughs at that, and Grantaire soon joins him, giving in to the euphoria once more. It's a communicative kind of laughter, one that bursts out into small fits, dies down, then starts back up. They're laughing, because Grantaire has a hugely embarrassing and embarrassingly huge crush on someone and that someone couldn't care less about it. They're laughing because Grantaire is happy. They're laughing because Grantaire is unafraid, and that might taste even better than happiness.

And Grantaire loves the taste of things that are shared, he loves stealing fries from other people's plates, or the very last spoonful of dessert, or the first sip of an expensive fruity drink. And so he shares this taste with Jehan, kisses him once more, soothes some of the everpresent hunger in his gut even as the broccoli keeps getting cooler and cooler.

The kiss deepens this time, even as they keep getting interrupted by their own giggles. Jehan tangles his fingers in Grantaire's short curls, holding on and being held onto. He hasn't washed his hand, Grantaire thinks inanely. He doesn't try to move away, pushes into the grip instead. He hopes his hair smells like cooking oil after this. He hopes his entire body is marked by the easy intimacy of this life in close quarters, the way this shared space has become a freedom instead of a prison.

He can say these things here. He's free to want and not want at the same time, and he can be celebrated in his contradictions, in the way it makes him so much happier than those many times he so desperately tried to resolve himself.

He's wanted here, but in a quiet way. Not the all-devouring depths of his own feelings, those dark tendrils of yearning that threaten to drown him. Jehan's is a tamed love, one that is happy to fill the space it is granted to bursting, but never beyond. Always so careful to stop before the explosion.

Grantaire is all explosions all the time, but that's okay, because Enjolras won't give him any fuse to lit, and Jehan will force him to clean up his mess and put things back together.

It fills him up, this energy. This mixed euphoria, something new and something old, not standing in contradiction to each other, but creating a contrast still. Lifting each other up.

He's so lucky. It's the phrase he used, but he's not in love, not really. Not as a feeling. The crushing weight of attraction he feels for Enjolras isn't anything as mature as love. And what he has with Jehan isn't really a feeling. It's a state. He loves and he is loved.

It's like floating on a calm sea, being surrounded but mostly being carried. It's like knowing he's over shallow ground, can stand up if he needs to, but not needing to.

He's giddy with it.

[howifeltabouthim]

But he never would speak to her of love; nor,—as he felt quite sure,—would she allow him to do so.

Anthony Trollope, from Phineas Finn

[lemonshrimp666]

Okay I gotta say this. Shadow and Maria are one of my all time OTPs in such a literary classic way. The physically weak but strong minded and empathetic martyr with the physically strong yet dark tormented soul. There’s an inherent unsaid ‘romance’ to their dynamic that is heartbreakingly undeniable to the audience and not necessarily to the characters own thoughts. The martyr giving the polar opposite a motivation to cling to the goodness that was shown to be so powerful that it is then only to carry out their last wish—a hope. Despite the clash of their own nature. It’s a classic tragic epitaph. Anyone can view them in any capacity but limiting the complexity of their unique circumstances as only “sibling coded” is, yes, a viewpoint. But to me, that is a very one note and not accurate to how ambiguous and deep the connection really is. Anyone is free to limit or see it how they see it. It transcends the boundaries of what we have experienced. Reminding me of the term Anam Cara, a bond that is not so simple, meaning “soul bond”, that runs deeper than what we socially understand/can ever define or put into words. It’s strange, powerful, and devoted. Shadow is just an anomaly, he doesn’t see himself as himself in a mirror but struggles with what he was created from that run deep with the mystery of his physical appearance. He battles with this darkness but Maria is the only light penetrable to juxtapose himself and bring him back to himself in the now, as if he was and only created for her, to watch out for, to finally cure her, to be strong for, to learn more about himself from, to be outside his own darkness—it’s for her and because of her—and that’s a classic romantic tragedy. He will only ever and then, be devoted to her even in her absence—and the impact she made and the promise he wants to keep, sadly is also what will forever keep him alone and guarded. Shadow is haunted by this and that’s what makes it such a memorable story and a wonderfully complex character I���ve always returned my thoughts to over the years. Because Maria isn’t really ever gone in his mind and the choices now in any way he spares others— to live or think in new ways—is then only carrying on her legacy (not Black Doom’s) and the importance she has implanted in his heart—even without his recognition at times. Anyone can view their connection in any way they see fit. It’s meant to be that way. Anyone hating on an interpretation can kick rocks because they’re all valid interpretations. We can all agree they’re a timeless bond regardless of thinking about it deeper bc nobody’s asking you to do that. I do implore people to do that though. For your own storytelling and analysis skills, if you want. It’ll allow anyone to also see the various interpretations as a wonder and not a threat. Shadow and Maria are a great start to analyze character dynamics in a deeper way! Xoxo

[tsukiyo-7]

Why do you ship wincest?

Don't you ever stop and think maybe it's a little weird to ship two brothers?

Just curious tbh, I really don't get it

Hello there!

I'm just gonna assume this is in good faith because it's better for us both this way.

The why is more or less the same anyone else involved in shipping might give you about their otp or whatever ship they might enjoy; I'm besotted with their dynamic, their interections, the touches and lingering glances, the said AND unsaid. I genuinely don't have the time right now to launch myself in an essay about all the reasons why I think they're crazy for each other, in every sense of the word, nor I think it is exactly what you're looking for, but if you scroll down a little on my blog you will most likely find a comprehensive list of canon moments that might point you to the right direction, if you so feel inclined.

As for the second question. Honestly? No, I don't.

To me, it's literal another fictional thing I enjoy among the countless other. Like, I'm totally aware that from an outside point of view and a surface level it appears fucked up, because that's a kneejerk reaction to the things that make us uncomfortable and, I mean this in the most neutral and non-judgemental way possible, you have to develop a certain level of analisis and disposition to overcome it; just like to some it appears fucked up that I enjoy horror stories or idk, that I can quote all 4 Twilight movies by heart lol. Damn, to some it's fucked up that I even listen to metal, so really, how stressed should I be about what it looks like from the outside? ("It" being my whole scope of interests apparently, depending who you ask).

The whole issues boils down to the fact that it's all not real. I know it's not real, my homies know it's not real, the existence of the ship and me liking it doesn't actually harm anyone, so why worry? I won't suddenly turn into an abuse apologist or whatever people might think because of a ship, because I'm a whole person with critical thinking and a fully developed moral compass that in no way cross paths with whatever is the subject of my bedtime story of the day; and if that was the case then it still wouldn't be the fiction fault but mine, or maybe, at most, of the people who raised me.

If you don't like horror don't watch it, if you don't like metal don't listen to it, if you don't like wincest block me. It's that simple.

[voidpunkanathema]

raihan

Why I like them: He's that guy that you THINK'S gonna be a total douche but is actually a really great guy once you get past first impressions. Liable to do something stupid trying to impress you. Dragon in human form. Canon fang haver. Brags about himself in the third person and should not be trusted with tapestries. Babygirl you need so much therapy /aff

Why I don’t: That hat that can't decide weather it's a sweatband or a beany. Seriously what is that thing on your head man

Favorite episode (scene if movie): Haven't watched any of his anime scenes tbh, kind of scared to after how dirty they did Leon. So I'll just use this section to show some love to the bit in Pokespe where he tries to take on Eternatus... himself. Not using a Pokemon. 

Favorite season/movie: See above 

Favorite line: ...I'm just gonna put "Especially you, Piers! The way you battled me in the Champion Cup... You really had my Dynamax Pokémon up against the wall!" and apologize profusely. Yes for ship reasons but also the fact that the guy starts hitting on a new rival in the middle of a Dynamax Pokemon rampage just feels weirdly on-brand? 

Favorite outfit: Shout out to that slightly douchey waistcoat ensemble with the Flygon shades from Masters...which he has a matching stupid, stupid hat for. 

OTP: Raihan/Leon/Piers and Raihan/Piers both qualify. Leon just straight up hits the "you don't even have to Ship It, some characters having had sex is just objective truth" threshold and they're often really sweet together, I just have to throw an alt boy in there too to get into it because my brain craves them like a body craves air. And Piers...they get tragically few scenes together but the ones they do get are so weirdly charged? Like someone else said there's a certain "should we be watching this?" energy to them lol 

Brotp: Leon also goes here, mostly because coming up for platonic explanations for the sheer depth of Raihan's brain rot in regards to that man leads to some FASCINATING relationship dynamics. I'm a big believer that romantic vs platonic indicates a relationship type rather than inherently implying a hierarchy of importance and these two are a great outlet for mentally rotating those themes. Also he and Gordie are fun in Masters, I like to think that they became friends while having shared sadboy time in the locker room. 

Head Canon: Probably my biggest is that with the way there's some pretty depressing shit left unsaid about the way he views himself, the occasional signs of anger issues he shows, and how he's the only member of The Rivalcule you don't meet the family of, the guy did NOT have a good childhood. On a lighter note, the guy has absolutely dogshit music taste. Like we're talking Skrillex and below here. The fact Piers doesn't strangle him over it is testament to the depth of his affection. 

Unpopular opinion: Don't really have one? 

A wish: Gigantamax Archaludon whenever the Galar remakes come out in 10-15 years, he deserves to just summon a wholeass suspension bridge (that notably has a weather-related signature move at that). And, well, just more of him in general. 

An oh-god-please-dont-ever-happen: Same as Piers, please don't throw this man into spacetime GameFreak 🤞

5 words to best describe them: Selfie boy kinda worries me 😔

My nickname for them: Rai, Rai-Rai...💖🐉

[blackbird-brewster]

20 Author Questions

Tagged by @danielleitloudernow TY!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Still accredited to my name? 135. Total works on AO3 that I've written (including Anon & Orphans) -- somewhere around 150?

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

1.1 MILLION!?!?!??! FUCKING WILD.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Criminal Minds (124). But also have some Thrilling Adventure Hour (4), Grey's (3), and a few other random fandoms where I've written one thing ever.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Caged (Kudos: 635)

The Disposition of Emily Prentiss (Kudos: 511)

I Won't Give Up (Kudos: 441)

A Series of Unfortunate Events (Kudos: 359)

i can't be wrong (to be craving you) (Kudos: 312) OMG I had no idea this fic had that many?!?!!

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I respond to every single comment I get!! Since I can't actually reach through the screen and hug every reader who leaves a comment, a reply is all I have!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Hmmm, Angstiest ending specifically? I would say 'The Five Horsemen of the Silent Chasm'. (Ends in major character death)

Angstiest overall fic? DEF, DEF, DEF my Jemily saga -- i can't be wrong (to be craving you)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I've written so much tooth-rotting fluff tbrh. Some cute shit that comes to mind:

Quiet Love (Jara Wedding Fluff!)

Always You (Temily proposal)

I Know a Place (Jara)

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I get entitled comments sometimes. To which I always reply, because I think it's important for other readers to see how not to behave in a comment section. This recent interaction comes to mind:

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

OF COURSE I DO!!! Lately, I have been writing a lot of smut because menopause has turned me into a 24/7 horny gay. All my fics are Femslash and I also write F/F/F threesomes because I have multiple OT3s 😇

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have written crossovers in the past! Two of my favourites are a TAH x Addams Family one : Beyond Belief: When Family Calls and a CM x Community crossover where Emily and Frankie Dart are estranged twins: Words Left Unsaid

11. Have you ever had a fiction stolen?

Not so much stolen, as I've seen parts of my own personal fanon lore being used in other fics sometimes. Which I find endearing. Me and @otahkoapisiakii have so many Jemily HCs that we often share the same background details in our fics and then, sometimes, readers see these things and mistakenly think they're canon.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yep! I've had a few fics translated into other languages. I think one was translated to Polish and another to Mandarin. Also, I think there's one in German somewhere too.

I LOVE when people ask to translate my works! It's such an honour.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

TONS. I think me and @otahkoapisiakii (Phoenix_falls on AO3) have about 6 or 7 we wrote together.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

That's an impossible question. My longest loved OTP will always be MSR. My most written OTP is JJ/Emily. My current favourite ships are JJ/Tara & Tara/Rebecca.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

When I retired from writing in 2015, I left behind a WIP (To Catch an Unsub). When I came back last year, I vowed to try and finish it. I re-wrote a lot of what had already been posted and managed a new chapter even -- but after nearly eight years, my writing style now is far different than when I started out in 2015. So I tied up the cliff-hanger and marked it as complete, because I know my heart isn't in it to continue that one.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I have a really good understanding of the characters, I know what makes them tick, their motives, their insecurities and I think that makes them feel more authentic in my works.

I'm also a very fast writer. Both physically (my typing speed is absurd), but also just being able to bang out 10k in a day when I have an idea.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

NUMBERS AND SELF-IMPOSED RULES! I used to have this thing (I still struggle with it, but less so now) where I'd be like 'Every one-shot or chapter can't be more than 4k words'. Or if it's a multi-chap fic it has to be at least x amount of words minimum.

When I started writing completely for myself, those rules stopped holding me back. Now, I write until I'm done writing. Thus why Fooled Around (and Fell in Love) - Part 3 is going to be around 200k long when it's done.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

If I use another language, it's usually French because I at least speak a bit of it and don't have to use Google translate or other horrible tools that butcher nuance.

I have a Spanish speaking character in Part 3 and that made me really have to dig out my limited Spanish speaking skills for her scenes. Which are probably grating to fluent speakers (apologies!)

I think the best thing you can do if you want to use a language you don't speak is to talk to people who do speak it. It helps make the dialogue more genuine.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Bones! During the WGA 2007 strike, I decided to fill the gap of TV hiatus with my own story. I wrote 'She Was My First' (Angela/Brennan) and posted it to LiveJournal (where I was in tons of Bones groups).

Since then, I ported it to AO3 around 2014. And now, it's the most read Angela/Brennan fic on there.

Fun Fact: Someone randomly leaving a comment on this fic last year was the reason I came back to writing!!

20. Favorite fic you've ever written?

I get this question a lot and I think my answer always changes because I love different fics for different reasons. So here are some of my top ones:

Fic I Love Everything About: Fooled Around (and Fell in Love) (Series)

Fics I Consider to be My Most Important: Head Full of Doubt & Journey Through the Silent Chasm (Series)

Fic I'm Most Proud of Writing: i can't be wrong (to be craving you)

My Comfort Fic (the one I re-read the most): Between You & Me

TAG YOU'RE IT: (no pressure!) @storiesofsvu || @gaelic-symphony || @ellegreenawayslover || @tedwinisconfused || @jenny-from-the-bau || @unitchiefs-blackbirdphoenix

[mister-eames]

1/2 not to tout the national & their songs, but a lot of their songs are arthur/eames coded for me! but definitely more the pining/before they get their shit together & GET together stage of their relationship. it's the unsaid words, the misunderstandings, the walking away without a backward glance, the "I'm in love with you but this is just a convenient fuck for you" stage of their relationship. so further recs: nobody else will be there, hard to find, start a war, england & about today.

2/2 also hozier's song unknown/nth

Ahhh thank you nonnie!!! I always find it so interesting what songs/artists people resonate with for arthur/eames slash their otp and how they interpret them. I'm going to take a listen to these!!! <3

[kitkatwinchester]

LET'S F*CKING GO!!!!

F*CKING FINALLY!!!!

THANK GOD!!!!

YES SCOTT!!!

WAY TO BE THE ALPHA!!!!

WAY TO MAKE THE MOVE!!!!

WAY TO FINALLY SAY IT, IN NOT SO MANY WORDS!!!!

LET'S F*CKING GO!!!

"You know what? I'm not sorry."

And that KISS!!!!

THAT FREAKING KISS!!!

Like.

The way they were both so awkward at first, like they always are, and Scott was so apologetic, and Kira was so self-conscious, and they just didn't know what to do with each other.

And then Scott left, and Kira set down the helmet, and she was all disappointed and clearly upset.

And then Scott OPENS THE FREAKING DOOR, and he COMES BACK, and he comes backs STRONG, and he RACES to her, and she JUMPS UP to meet him, and they KISS and EMBRACE and KISS!!

And it is ALL kinds of passionate, and filled with ALL kinds of love, and ALL of the things left unsaid, and it is SO FREAKING BEAUTIFUL and SO FREAKING PERFECT, and SCIRA IS FREAKING AMAZING!!!

And the way they just SMILE SO F*CKING LOVINGLY at each other after I CANNOT!

I LOVE SCIRA SO MUCH!!!!

SCIRA REMAINS AS MY SCOTT OTP!!!! IT REALLY DOES!!!

ADD THIS TO THE LIST OF SCENES THAT I WILL RE-WATCH UNTIL THE DAY I DIE!!!

BECAUSE THAT WAS FREAKING BEAUTIFUL!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3

(And that SHOT, with the LIGHT behind them!! I don't CARE how cliche it is, it was F*CKING BEAUTIFUL!!! I LOVE SCIRA SO MUCH!!! <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3)

[princesstillyenna]

Anonymising (is that a word? spell check tells me it's a word) another ask for this

16, 22 and/or 34 for the writer‘s ask, please😊

16.  How many drafts do you need until you’re satisfied with a project?

I don't actually draft 🫣 I just fuckin write. start to finish usually. It all happens in chronological order and it just falls out of my brain. Then I'll go through and do a spelling and grammar check and then depending on the length and content of the fic I might ask for a beta, but drafts aren't a thing for me.

22.  Who is/are your favourite pairing(s) to write?

God, that's a hard question? I don't think I have one??? Fred and Auston usually appear in the background of any leafs fic, but I rarely write them as a main pairing. I'm very much not an OTP kind of person because I'll pair anybody with anybody because it's fun. Let me check my stats... OK, according to my Ao3 stats, my top 3 pairings are 1988, Carter/Cale and Henrik/Igor. The anti's are gonna fucking love that 🫣 I'm gonna say Henrik and Igor is my favourite pairing 🤣🤣🤣

34.  What was the hardest scene you ever had to write?

I really struggle writing sex scenes. It feels like pulling teeth, every word. I also hate being mean to my characters but I love how they are after bad stuff happens. I often feel like in my fics readers might be like "I feel this character is massively overreacting to what was a relatively small trauma" if I use the example of the D/s verse of Bewilderment and Things Left Unsaid, there's a scene in there in which Dylan Strome and Michael Latta have a BDSM scene that goes wrong. I hated writing that, and eventually I made it much tamer than I had originally planned in my head, for so many reasons, I didn't want my readers to hate Latts, because IT'S LATTS, and I didn't want to write something THAT BAD happening to Dylan. But I had the idea that there would be a scene 'go wrong' and it would traumatise him, but actually writing that scene was super hard for me. So I guess yeah, that's been the hardest bit to write so far. I hatet being mean to my blorbos from my shows (hockey is a show. fight me)

THANKS FOR THE ASK FRIEND :D

[genevievemd]

2, 24, 27, 29

Thanks!!

You got it peanut 💕

2. Any sleep habits either had to get used to?

Not too much for G, because once she’s asleep she doesn’t register anything, she’s basically dead to the world lol. Ethan on the other hand, he had to get used to a blanket hog and a snuggler. Mostly the blanket hog. He calls her this little burrito cause she rolls in the blankets.

She needs at least 3 blankets, Ethan doesn’t understand it. Even in summer. It mostly has to do with her always being cold, while Ethan rarely is. So when he does end up with barely any blankets it’s not that big of a deal

And they both had to get used to sharing a bed with someone. I hc that most of Ethan’s girlfriends (Harper included) rarely spent the night, so he wasn’t used to sharing his bed (for sleeping) with someone on the regular. And G, while she’s gone sleepovers with her sister and shared a bed with her, it’s different when it’s a romantic partner. Ryan was adamant that she never stayed overnight, there was maybe two or three times in the year they were together that she’d stayed over but that was it. So for both, getting used to sharing the bed was the biggest struggle. But they got over it quickly because

24. What do their texts look like?

Lots of emojis from G, shorthanded words and barely any punctuation. Ethan on the other hand rarely uses emojis, and always types in complete sentences. He also only texts regularly with like 3 people 😂

Here’s a fun little fact for you: sometimes when they don’t feel like typing out “I love you” or don’t have to time as they’re rushing to some emergency, they’ll just send 3 heart. One for each word.

27. Who brings home an illegal pet?

Gen. She’s already brought home a stray 😂

29. Who said I Love You, first?

Gen. It took them way too long to say it out loud. Neither wanted to put pressure on the other and we’re waiting for the other to say it first, so it went unsaid for a long time. Though both knew the loved each other.

And then one night G just blurted it out, and the rest is history.

OTP Questions

[demonsonthemoon]

Bread & Roses

Fandom: Les Misérables Pairing: Grantaire & Jehan Word Count: 1171 Rating: Gen Summary: Jehan and Grantaire aren't a couple, but they do live together. And they also co-own a bakery/flower shop. Notes: Happy anniversary @anastasiapullingteeth <3 Every day I am amazed and grateful to still be able to call you my friend after so long!

Read it on AO3.

“Oh, you're helping your husband now that your work is done?”

The lady asks Grantaire as he directs her towards the camelias.

“Helping my...?” He starts, confused, before throwing a look over at the counter. Jehan is ringing up a thirty-something who just bought one of their pre-made arrangements. Grantaire is 93% sure that they're visiting their mom for dinner.

Jehan, as always, fits in perfectly with the interior of the shop. His hair, which reaches just over his shoulders, is pushed back by a yellow headband. He's wearing jeans overalls over a striped long-sleeved top, and there's big sunflower patch on his front pocket, the tips of the petals just visible above the counter. That's when it finally dawns on Grantaire what the lady is talking about.

“Oh, no! Jehan's the one helping me. I'm the florist. He's the baker. He just likes to hang out behind the register on days when he has nothing to do.”

The lady opens her mouth and her eyebrows bunch up in frustration. Grantaire busies himself arranging the camelias she asked for.

From the corner of his eyes, he sees her gaze flick back towards Jehan, who's finished with his customer and is reaching for the full rolls of wrapping paper that are on one of the highest shelves.

They get this kind of thing a lot. Jehan is a lot thinner and more gangly than Grantaire and loves wearing bright colors and flower patterns. So people take one look at him and assume he's the one running the flower shop.

Grantaire, on the other hand, is fatter than his mother ever thought he should be (which isn't saying much, actually, considering how ridiculous her standards were), likes his clothes large and shapeless and has calloused hands that are scraped bloody more often than not. He also has perpetual bags under his eyes which would indeed be easier to explain if he was the baker out of the two of them. He's not though.

Grantaire studied art for a year, and when he realized that he hated school and also that he wasn't into the idea of selling himself the way living from his painting demanded, he switched to flowers. It keeps his creative side entertained and makes use of all the knowledge of color theory he's worked so hard to build. Grantaire likes being around pretty things, and so he has his flower shop, and he has Jehan.

Jehan, who studied literature and languages, loved school. He loved it and he still loves words, but he also learned that if he didn't have something else to balance his life, he would get so lost in language he wouldn't remember himself. The end of his college years coincided with his worst mental spiral ever, the kind where he wouldn't have been able to hold onto a job even if he had found one, and so he had decided to do something with his hands, to keep himself busy and to quiet the swirling mess of his thoughts, and that's how he'd learned to bake bread.

Along their way, they had found each other, two people among a group of raucous friends and revolutionaries, and they had seemed to just... fit. They bring out the best in each other, and sometimes the worst. There are difficult moments, moments where they would drown each other if they couldn't count on their larger group of friends. But those moments have been getting rare for a while.

Grantaire leads the lady and her bouquet of camelias towards the register, where Jehan is looking quite proud of himself after having retrieved a new roll of wrapping paper.

“And how long have you been together then?” the customer asks while Grantaire shuffles behind the counter.

Jehan looks at her with an expression that Grantaire always describes as “benevolent confusion.”

“We're not together,” Grantaire interrupt. “That will be € 23, thank you. I mean, we're not a couple.”

“We're roommates!” Jehan specifies with a smile, while the middle-aged lady stares at them, getting more discomfited by the minutes. “Although we're not renting anymore... Can you still call yourself roommates if you own the building?”

“Well, we do share the same room,” Grantaire adds helpfully, making sure he's speaking clearly enough for his nosy customer to hear him. She isn't actively trying to be mean, he knows that, and he should be making sure that she's having a good “customer experience” or whatever so she'll come back but... Grantaire is tired. He is very tired of being judged for what he looks like, for what Jehan looks like, for what he and Jehan look like together. Either he's being scorned and insulted because people think that they're together, or he's being judged because they aren't. They just can't seem to win, and people still wonder why Grantaire has bags under his eyes.

The truth is that Jehan and Grantaire had become roommate when Jehan was still studying, because Grantaire couldn't afford a flat on his own and Jehan could still count on some scholarship money. They started fucking a few months after moving in together, and all of their friends had expected that particular development to blow up in their face but it hadn't. Grantaire and Jehan know what they mean to each other, and also what they don't. They don't promise anything they can't give.

“Yeah, sure,” Jehan continues, handing the customer her wrapped camelias. “But it's only because you decided to turn your own bedroom into an art studio.”

“Well, not exactly only for that reason,” Grantaire says with a lascivious grin.

The lady snatches her flower and turns away, and Grantaire is extremely glad to see her go, slumping down on the counter. Jehan immediately leans his weight into him.

Grantaire worked as an employee in several flower shops for a few years, while Jehan finished his studies, then his additional training, and figured out what to do.

And then their friend Marius' grandfather decided to sell one of his properties, and Marius had decided that his friend could not not buy the building, even if it meant that he had to spend most of his savings on it because Jehan and Grantaire would never have gotten a big enough loan. They'd been lucky that Cosette had enough money to sustain both herself and her boyfriend on her own, and also that Grantaire and Jehan could promise the couple free flowers and desserts for their wedding in exchange for their generosity.

So they had bought a building, turning the ground floor and basement into their shop and bakery, and the two floors above that into a cosy flat.

It worked for them, and their living room was spacious enough to gather all of their friends.

The shop, which sold fresh bread and pastries in the morning, and flowers all day long, was called Bread and Roses. Not a lot of the customers got the reference, but it had made Enjolras smile the first time Jehan had told him about it.

[tvistedminds]

MIRA x DAMIEN MOODBOARD 001

@ofcaliginous

[mothdogs]

i know ppl are talking about game of thrones leaks and a jaime/brienne sex scene this week but tbh if it doesn’t happen with emotional catharsis first then i don’t want it. i’d honestly be thrilled with jaime telling brienne she’s the real reason he wanted to become a better man (and hence ride north) and brienne finally overcoming her emotional misgiving/fear and saying that she loves him. and then a kiss would be enough for me. sex would be great, but blease let them at least just connect with words first

[mihrunnisasultans]

I got my life back with you. If I have to die, I want my last minute to be with you.

Mustafa x Mihrünnisa +  meaningful looks for the MY/K OTP series

[loveisalwaystheanswer]

Hello from people who still love Grace and her pairing with Tommy. Yes, season 6 is already behind and look at us, we exist nevertheless. Even when she's dead. We are still here. Furious, devastated and heartbroken AF and as we've been since S3.

Nothing of what I will say can be said without the word 'fuck' after every sentence. But I'll try not to swear too much.

Grace's presence is unmistakably evident, but throughout the sixth season never have we heard her name being said in any context, by anyone. Not once. All we had is these fucking symbols and subtext.

"Why do you still care? Why don't you just get over it? You need to calm down. This show is more than just about love interests." Fucking hell no. This show is the only fictional story that crawled under my skin, in my bones and now it's running in my blood. Love theme is one of the main themes in PB. Yes, this show is not about gangsters, it's about humans with feelings. In my humble opinion love is the most powerful thing that exists. And it's always more than just in a romantic way. So, I HAD my otp and now it's dead. SK dashed it against the rocks. One of the reasons why I hope Tommy Shelby will die in the upcoming movie is that I see it as the only way for all the peakys to release themselves from Tommy's tight grip. The other one is that my crazy shipper's mind sees that the only opportunity for Tommy to reunite with Grace is in the afterlife. And this thought I'll cherish till the very end. But Steven Knight said he wants to redeem Tommy therefore Tommy Shelby won't die. This is the hardest part for me to comprehend.

So, what have we got?

1) The portrait of Grace (twice!!! how LUCKY we are!)

The first one was before Ruby's death. Thanks for making people associate Grace with something ominous, intimidating and bad. Because she was absolutely worshipped by the fandom already. Love this one. *sarcasm*

2) Tommy talking to Esme about the sapphire. And we heard the name 'John' but didn't hear the name 'Grace' while they were talking about that damn vagina sapphire. The one SHE was wearing when she was shot. Why, dear God, why?...

3) The second one presence of Grace's portrait

Honestly, I feel myself so ambivalent about this scene in particular. I love it as much as I hate it. The only one scene where no one else is involved and there's just Tommy and his thoughts about Grace. But at the same time it reminds me of so many things that were left unsaid. That's why I hate it.

4) The lock of Grace's hair. Ok, this one I love with my whole being. It's a heartwarming, bittersweet and touching moment. I can only imagine how he found the strength in himself to cut it off. I think there was no way he could let anyone else touch Grace. And what about the ring on his neck, dunno, but some part of me thinks he didn't wear that ring all the time. But it was sacred to him all the same.

Still, no mention of Grace. Not once. Was it too much to ask?

Well, this story is as old as time, but I still can't believe how disrespectful her death was handled, so SK could keep using her like that.

[found--family]

d e s t i e l

the things we dont say can swallow us whole eating us alive until we cease to exist and all that remains are shadows of the love we felt and echoes of the love we never said