#I’m just very autistic about them lol
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shiningstarr15 · 4 months ago
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Alright I’ve seen enough takes on this and while I understand everyone’s viewpoint and validate it I want to give mine bc mine is probably a very niche perspective.
When it comes to the relationship between Gregory and Vanessa, I do view them as siblings. And no not in the umbrella way, not in the “this is the only thing that makes the most sense” sort of way, I mean they have sibling energy period. And I’ll tell you why.
Bc I do not view them as being immediate found family. At all. They have too much trauma both independently and with each other. I don’t even think they’d like each other very much at first. I feel like their initial relationship would be more of a ”you saved me so I’ll return the favor by helping you out” way.
Personally. I don’t think relationships with strong bonds should immediately go into something romantic or familial (maybe it’s cuz I’m raging aroace and very platonic/queerplatonic bc I know that’s an unpopular opinion) but in my eyes, you NEED TO BUILD A FRIENDSHIP FIRST. and I think that’s exactly what they’re gonna do.
They’re gonna slowly and gradually form a friendship, one that most people would think is strange and unusual bc it’s an adult and a child but let’s be fr neither of them are what you’d consider “typical” (yes I personally hc them both being ND. Again, this is my opinion). I also don’t think they don’t really give af what people think. So why would they bother putting a label that they don’t really agree with on them? No imo they won’t do that unless they truly do mean it.
Again, this could very well be projecting. But I am personally someone that doesn’t like being given a “sister” label unless it’s actually meant. Maybe it’s my extreme sibling complex. But I don’t think I’m wrong for feeling that way. And imo, I think overtime they would view each other in the way best friends view each other as siblings. I don’t even think there would even need to be anything legal. But if there was, she would be a legal guardian at best. Bc it still gives the freedom to identify how they choose. And to me, it’s very similar to Lilo and Nani from “Lilo and Stitch.”
Bc I think two things can be true at the same time. Vanessa can be a caregiver, and have some responsibilities when it comes to making sure Gregory is ok and kept safe. But also, she herself needs someone to take care of her. Bc she can’t. And while I do like the idea of Freddy taking care of them both, I also like them taking care of each other.
She definitely has aspects that could be seen as maternal, but I don’t view her as essentially parental. She simply isn’t ready. There’s too much trauma and a bit of emotional immaturity (again not a bad thing, she’s very childlike imo). I think she sees him more equal than that. Not someone that is helpless and needs to be watched 24/7. But someone that needs a little guidance every now and then. And that’s where I think looking up to her in an older sibling kinda way comes in.
She’s like a combined playmate and caregiver. An equal partner but also someone that takes on the worst of the burden so he doesn’t have to. Even though he will do so anyway bc he cares that much about her.
So yea, that’s my take on their relationship. Again, it’s just my opinion, and I understand people not agreeing and wanting something else for them. But this is how I choose to view them, and I don’t think that it’s wrong ❤️
#this has been a hot take by Starrshine#I know most people will disagree and that’s fine#but I personally don’t like giving labels Willy nilly in order for things to make sense#bc in my experience the label is validation#and I know it’s not like that for everyone and that’s fine#but I really don’t think it’s more complicated than that#it’s not necessarily that they don’t fit into any category it’s just something that happens gradually over time#she has very strong maternal big sister energy imo#it’s not the first time we’ve seen that#found family can be labels too it doesn’t have to be unlabeled#but it CAN be#again two things can be true at once#and I think it’s important to understand sometimes that label IS important to people#besides I don’t think they’d call each other ‘bro’ and ‘sis’ all the time anyway it’d be mostly their names/nicknames#like he’d mostly call her that either to butter her up or in a state of extreme vulnerability#again you can interpret however you desire if you think they are something else that’s fine#but I’m always gonna interpret them like this so respect my interpretation and I’ll respect yours ❤️#fnaf#fnaf vanessa#fnaf Gregory#doublestar duo#they are still unique in their own way don’t worry#and I still like the idea of them viewing each other as equals//partners//buddies#just in a different way ya know#they are just very near and dear to me#starrshine speaks#starrshine’s hot takes#I’m just very autistic about them lol#and I just needed to get this off my chest
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eebie · 11 hours ago
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Grinds my teeth to dust…. i wish touch didnt have so many Implications. im just trying to survive out here
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#after all this i need a cuddle and a movie But who do i ask withoit them thinking im coming on to them#i need to paint a giant doomsday-guy-on-the-street-corner style sign to wear around my neck that says I AM AROMANTIC ASEXUAL#born to hug and kiss all my friends forced to stand around hands in my pockets#im scared to death of people misinterpreting my behavior or feeling uncomfortable#od be so much more relaxed like at a core of my being level if this was a nonissue#dude im desperate i might just ask the guy i almost fell asleep on tje otjet night#the ice is broken and he already knows my deal#(fantasizing about snuggling with people i like) im so fucked up ….#it’s also made way worse by tje fact that I apparently come off as very flirtatious#im playful and i love people Sorry …..#im like All or Nothing . oh my god lol#i had a friend who called me her ‘koala’ because i was constantly clinging to her#we were 7 so it was socially acceptable#99% of the time we were together i was wrapped around her legs or torso. i miss you so much sybil#the start of the end was when i innocently restrd my chin on my friend’s shoulder to watch what he was doing#and the next day someone asked me why i did that#i was like huh…? he’s my friend?#why wouldn’t i?#then i felt all weird about it And ive felt weird about it sincd#unrelated but my best friend is autistic she has misophonia and hates touch But im the misopjonia exception(real thing) AND#i’m one of the only people she hugs. straight up my biggest flex ever
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wildevenusian · 2 months ago
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(​it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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lightblueminecraftorchid · 5 months ago
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Can we *please* have pride events that are more accessible to autistic people please golly
I lasted maybe 3 hours at pride before melting down, and that was *with sensory accommodations*. We took a break in a sensory space multiple times! I wore ear guards all the time! I wore safe comfy clothes and drank lots of cool water for temp regulation!
but huge huge crowds outside in sticky heat with packed streets and super bass boosted music. which was amplified by my ear guards. everyone was so nice when we talked to them, but I couldn’t talk to anybody because taking off my ear guards hurt too much and I was rapidly losing speech. it was fun shopping at all the art stalls and meeting people, but the stalls were closely crowded and moving between them was difficult.
like. I was the only visibly autistic person there that I saw. and I saw a LOT of people. and there were lots of other things me n my friends wanted to do, that we couldn’t do, because the place was too overwhelming and I melted down.
kinda feels lonely. I didn’t really get to talk to or meet a lot of people.
I wish there were smaller inside events alongside the huge outside ones. like a board game thing or smth. an indoor social. a few inside art stalls. *something*. Even an indoor drag show! There were drag events they were hosting and I couldn’t watch or enjoy them bc the music outside was So Fucking Loud.
there are other issues I had with that event but that’s the main thing. it turned smth I was excited to participate in, into smth I was just quietly miserable about. which kinda sucks. was worth it to go try once, but I don’t think I’d go again.
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shego1142 · 4 months ago
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I super recommend Colleen Christensen for more info on eating without food rules and eating intuitively!
Her videos are helping me unravel a lot of issues I have struggled with regarding food!
Just the simple act of not shaming yourself for craving and or eating specific foods can be so powerful and beneficial to your life/mental health (which in turn affects all of your health)
"craving a food means your body needs something that food can offer" now what the fuck does my body need with an ice cream
#also if you’re craving salty foods or straight up salt#you need salt#lol I love how straightforward that one is#that said this does actually depend on how you grew up and the food you’re used to because your body is craving things based on#the prior experiences it had getting said nutrient#like my grandma would make me a banana milkshake when I didn’t feel too good#I have multiple chronic illnesses and what not#well the other day I had an insanely bad migraine#and I was having like insane muscle cramps and pain#and my friend just so happened to make me a banana milkshake#and the migraine was damn near cured because I was like critically low on potassium#I then downed like 2 more bananas after that#I didn’t think about it at first but I absolutely had been craving a bana milkshake the entire day prior#ur body learns what gives it the things it needs which is why variety it’s important to an intuitive diet#I think I might start a little journal with my cravings and what they might mean my body needs#right now I’m craving natto and chocolate (not together#those are just the two things that sound really good right now#oh also sometimes I think a craving can be for a texture of a food especially for autistic peeps#sensory seeking#there’s this caramel bar that little Debbie makes#and I’m literally not allowed to be near them#not because “sweets are bad or anything but because it’s the exact type of chewy that I crave#I’ve eaten two entire boxes in one sitting#despite the fact that I ar some point very distinctly stopped liking the taste/stopped wanting to eat it#but it’s the only thing I know that gives me that specific sensory input#so I try to avoid them or only have them once and a while#eating intuitively isn’t always ‘what my body wants it gets’#you do have to look at stuff logically too but just don’t shame your body for wanting something#if you go ‘wow I’m craving ice cream’ and shame yourself for it you associate a very legit craving with guilt and restriction#but on the flip side if you go ‘wow I’m craving ice cream’ and eat the entire carton then your body isn’t going to have room
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canisvesperus · 2 years ago
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:D
#I need to. APPRECIATION POST FOR MY BFF#who I love very much#and doesn’t have tumblr so I’ll gush here lol#I think the root of a lot of my problems with former friends boils down to them not having similar lived experiences as me#no idpol but tbh it does not lend them to having as much of a potential to really empathize with me and understand my individual struggles#to be quite frank it REALLY boils down to white friends with their white fragility and virtue signaling#who just cannot be bothered to do something with their privilege when the time comes for them to make a choice that impacts the rest of us#because suddenly they don’t want to rock the boat or get involved in an argument or ohhh it’s just so complicated and confusing :///#where did your punch a nazi energy go? all of your posturing and self proclaimactions of allyship were ultimately bullshit get over yourself#okay enough venting let’s get to the point: it is so refreshing beyond words to have another Indigiqueer who you can trust#and who can intimately fathom all of this frustration I have had to deal with…#I have always gotten on well with other first gen immigrants but that does not mean we have the same experiences beyond a surface level#we’re both autistic similar interests similar politics even similar experiences with wrestling historical/colonial identity#bff is even vegan and we always talk about cooking our precolonial dishes for one another since they are usually plant based :D#mutual and intense hatred of spain and france as colonial powers is cathartic too and idk just so interesting to see how it has left a mark#on both of our cultures in very similar ways despite being otherwise pretty different and an entire ocean away… sad that many things we have#in common are results of having the same colonizers… okay I said I wouldn’t VENT DAMN!!! anyway I feel understood completely#and it’s super AWESOME and we spend lots of time together every day and broo healthy communication and boundaries for once in my life!!!!#former friends could never holy shit… we can trust each other with anything and it’s so great and conversation is effortless stress free#bff feels the same way and tells me all the time it makes me so :D!!! also my bff is super smart and I’m always learning new things#I think I always missed out on the best friend experience bro let’s not even get into the first and only one prior… but THIS. yep this is it#the fact that we both already agreed on so many things and shared so many interests upon the first few conversations was unbelievable lucky#divine intervention or something because I never go out of my way to make friends and poof. new friend starts talking to me out of nowhere#I love my best friend!!! sorry if you’re a yt who truly puts in the effort but the bar has been drastically raised#I’m no longer settling for mediocre white people who look to me for validation get your ass out of here for REAL I’m SICK of y’all 💀💀💀💀💀#genuinely fuck you get out of my sight I do not have the patience any longer! btw any of my current white friends reading this ur cool dw 👍#if you weren’t cool you’d be gone long before this dissertation lol…#feeling so honored and thankful every day :) really really happy :D I hope everyone like me feeling isolated and alone right now finds#someone like this! mind blowing how I stayed sane in the past having been surrounded by unsavory characters sheesh…#ven talks
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nightcolorz · 5 months ago
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I would love to hear your thoughts on autistic Armand, if you haven’t already spoke about this! Imo he’s very autsitic coded, and it’s very precious to me as an autistic iwtv fan :]
OMG!!! RUNS AROUND. Yes lmao I talk about this a lot actually it is one of my favorite Armand things to meta about bcus I’m also autistic and he is my special interest🙏I was trying to find some of the stuff I’ve written about autistic Armand but tumblrs search engine makes it near impossible to find anything so I gave up 😭, but believe me they r out there. Even tho I talk about this a lot I would love love love to talk about it some more for u anon because I can never get enough of armandtism.
I first figured Armand was autistic when I was reading the vampire Lestat because when he is first introduced he is completely non verbal and only communicates through the mind gift. through further explanation it’s very much implied that he does this because he finds putting his thoughts into words hard and he considers just projecting them into peoples brains much easier. Armand speaks out loud for the first time like more than halfway through the book, and lestat is surprised to hear him lol. This is super autistic I feel like that’s obvious 🙏 it’s basically the vampire power equivalent of using a non verbal communication device. Armand having trouble with connecting with people, understanding how to “fit in”, and talking r prevailing parts of his character throughout the whole series (not just tvl) which solidified my headcanon into basically a canon fact in my mind lol.
When Armand is first introduced in iwtv his strangeness is chalked up to his vampirism, but it’s soon revealed throughout tvl and qotd that Armand is considered a strange outcast by other vampires. The things he struggles with r unique to him and r not representative of vampires in general. His otherness/strangeness can also not be chalked up to his trauma or his age turned because Armand was also an outcast as a young child. It’s described in the vampire Armand that Armand was not understood by his parents or his community because he was obsessed with and freakishly good at painting. His community interprets his unusualness as a sign of some divine intervention, the priests believe he is a saint or a prophet sent to earth, even at times saying things implying that he is “not human”. Unusually high quickly developing skill in childhood is an autistic trait, as is hyper fixation on an activity/topic that becomes a core identity factor and prevailing obsession. The affects of Armand’s trauma only worsen the severity of his autistic traits. C-ptsd and autism often overlap and coexist in autistic people who were traumatized in childhood, which seems to be Armand’s case.
in queen of the damned Armand is at his peak autistic lol, I feel like this is when most book readers gain that head canon. The Devils minion chapter revolves around Armand using Daniel as a guide to help him learn how to be “normal” and to blend in to the modern age. Armand can’t seem to figure out how to blend in on his own because he is unable to understand social norms of any time period enough to integrate himself into society. Armand is in love with technology and what most would consider monotonous sensory experiences. He stares at his own reflection for hours, he loves kitchen appliances and watching ingredients whir in blenders, cameras, he watches the same movie over and over again and never gets bored of it. The way Armand fixates on technology really reminds me of how a lot of autistic people played as children. He enjoys repetitive, sensory behaviors over “fun”. For Armand this means watching the same things repeatedly, which is a form of visual stimming. There r moments where Armand is trying to understand his world, but is so blind to what he is trying to understand that he goes about his discoveries wrong. Such as in qotd when he tries to interrogate strangers to gain information on societal norms but he only gets uncomfortable glances. Armand is desperate to understand and to connect but he is consistently inherently alienated, whether it be from humanity or from other vampires or from himself.
Armand also can not process his memories comprehendingly. This is part trauma part autism, but autism is def a factor. Because of his repressed trauma induced memory loss Armand finds it difficult to talk about himself to people. This is worsened by Armand being unable to comprehend the aspects of story telling that he needs to be able to tell people about his life. Armand explains to Daniel that he vividly remembers small details, such as dates and weather, but he could not tell Daniel what “things were like” because he “doesn’t know what that means”. Literal thinking, the inability to grasp vague, fiction based concepts like narratives and metaphor, and strict fixation on minor details like numbers, are all autistic traits!
Armand also struggles heavily with emotional regulation. He is described as often having intense and extreme meltdowns where he cries and screams and breaks things. Armand is easily bothered, in tva he mentions that he covers his ears when he is overwhelmed. The vampire Armand begins actually with Armand becoming overwhelmed in public and trying to escape to an attic so that he can be alone in silence. Armand copes with his intense emotions by putting on a mask of neutrality. He is often described as expressionless and blank, uncanny. But this is a mask, and when Armand can no longer mask and his disguise lapses his facial expressions r described by lestat as being so over the top and emotional that they are disturbing and weird. Over the top unnatural facial expressions as well as blank unreadable ones are both autistic traits. For Armand he is naturally overly emotive to the point of being considered horrifying, and he hides this by taking the opposite extreme. Either way, either expression Armand puts on causes him to be socially outcast.
Armand often describes feeling like there is something wrong with him that causes him to be isolated from others and he’s not sure what it is. In prince lestat he tells Gregory that he doesn’t know why it’s so hard for him to have relationships when other vampires are fully capable of doing that. In the vampire Armand he explains to David that he’s crazy because his mind isn’t built right and his senses are tripled so he shouldn’t bother trying to understand him. I rlly relate to this as someone who felt like I was from another dimension as a child bcus i didn’t know the unspoken life rules everyone else did.
Armand is often treated like a child by the other vampires and assumed to be emotionally immature and too fragile and insane to be helpful. Armand says in the vampire Armand that he doesn’t consider himself an adult because he can’t function like one. This could be due to the age he was turned, but it’s shown to us that characters like Benji and even to an extent Claudia r able to self regulate and function appropriately despite being turned even younger then Armand was.
in conclusion, book Armand is an autistic person who was never given proper support or understanding because the environment and the time period he was born in decided to alienate him further rather then work to help him socialize and learn appropriate skills, and because of the necessities he has been deprived of and the horrible trauma he endured Armand is never able to learn to function in the way he was likely capable of. this recessive quality in pair with his autism caused Armand it be unable to cope or self regulate or learn ways to understand himself since he wasn’t given a chance to in his formative years. He’s a great representative of what many autistic people who experienced intense child abuse experience.
Im rlly happy with the shows portrayal with Armand so far partly because he is omg, so autistic. Show Armand shares so many of book Armand’s autistic traits. inability to understand himself or others, fixation on small details but inability to understand the big picture, etc. even his iPad is autistic asf! My ipad is my comfort item that I carry around with me to self sooth, and this is def the vibe Armand’s iPad gives me in the show. Even assads performance is autistic! He is able to play Armand masking and Armand unmasking, the stilted expressions he gives and the blank stares, the uncomprehending earnestness. AGHHHH!! Assad stims with his fingers when Armand is nervous too which is just an amazing touch. I hope the show explores Armand’s autism, because that would literally be a dream come true. Even still, for now I’m satisfied.
thank u so so much anon for the ask this made me so happy 🙏❤️ autistic Armand means so much to me and has gotten me though some tough times. Understanding and analyzing Armand helps me understand myself better and feel more comfortable with how I am. Earlier this year I gave myself a concussion because I was harmfully stimming during a meltdown, and while I was in the emergency room I was holding the vampire Armand and imaging that he would relate to what I was going through. So yeah he is very special to me too! And once again it makes me so so happy that u got me to talk some about it. I hope this was coherent or interesting lol I felt like I was all over the place
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laikabu · 8 months ago
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re: my thoughts on laios’s sexuality (long post ahead lol)
let me start this post with this. first, this contains a lot of references to the new adventurer’s bible world guide book released last february. i can read japanese, but i’m sure they’re translated somewhere. general spoiler warning in case. also… i am ESL, so sorry for any grammar errors
second, if you’re on the team that insists laios doesn’t care about humans enough to form relationships, either read the manga again or at the very least read this thread.
last, please don’t chime in with your acearo headcanons on this post. there’s already a majority of posts here that insist laios is acearo and that anything else is impossible. i don’t like it the same way i don’t like when someone declares they hc marcille as bisexual to a poster who reads her as lesbian. i already have enough people here who declare he’s ace on my own art. at least people on twitter of all places don’t do this sort of thing to me. nothing in this manga is canon, you can headcanon anything i won’t get mad if you hc him as bi or something. just. don’t be weird on my post.
okay. trust me, i love women, and i love the idea of making my favs women lovers but the idea of laios being gay really appeals to me because of his background. this isn’t fueled by yaoi since i don’t even ship the only m/m relationship i bring up here, i just think it adds a nice layer to his disconnect with his own humanity
i do think laios has a very abstract relationship with his sexuality for a multitude of reasons. he grew up in a very conservative backwater village. he has a hard time recognizing his own feelings towards others just as much as vice versa. i don’t really care for the “laios is a monsterfucker” agenda people are pushing but i do think he’d engage in sexual thoughts in his own weird way, i won’t deny his deviantart fetish shit
as an autistic person myself, i relate to how he’d prioritize his special interest over social interactions. after all, he was fixated on monster food so he’s distracted from dark thoughts. he’s not an actual glutton
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he’s shy around women, but i don’t think it’s out of attraction. i just think it’s because he’s awkward and doesn’t want to be seen as a threat. there’s a couple of times when, out of armor, he deliberately tries to make himself look smaller and nonthreatening.
he didn’t show any interest towards ashivia (the hubby hunter girl marcille replaced) and just humored her because she wouldn’t leave him alone. his other party members thought he was giving her special treatment so he had to tell her he “doesnt want to give her special treatment anymore”(even though he never did), so she left
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ashivia did her best to butter herself up to laios and he didn’t care, but laios thought shuro was his bestest friend in the whole world because he was too much of a pushover to reject him. ironically… what ashivia did to him parallels what he was doing to shuro
also… yeah sorry i keep bringing up that one comic of laios saying if he were falin he’d marry shuro and then begging him to take him back to his country, or that comic of laios wondering why he doesn’t like him(and then the first two questions he asks the magic mirror was what if he or shuro were women). i don’t even ship them! but it’s not a reach to assume that he likes men because of this, even if it’s kinda played like a joke(after all,a lot of people like chilshi even though their ‘shippy’ interaction was played as a joke)
of course, given the setting, i don’t think knows he’s gay, he wouldn’t have the vocabulary to label himself. i do want to dance around with the idea of him forcibly confronting his own sexuality after years of yaad pressuring him to produce heirs lol. laios might not be cishet but he’s a king so he rdgaf about that right now. i’m open to him having female consorts for political reasons, but i don’t think he’s into women, is all.
before anyone brings up his succubus… god forbid an author makes hetbait. a part of the plot twist was that not-marcille wasn’t the only succubus enticing laios, his other party members were copied too. she was the only one who approached him. also… succubi aren’t always inherently romantic. once it realized marcille didn’t work, it switched to appeal to his desire to be a monster.
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personne-reblogs · 2 years ago
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AUTISTIC SWEEP
The shouts of the crowd are fading into white noise. 
The curtains are closing. 
The lights are dimming. 
The air still feels filled with static, though. 
This is a fight Donatello had known he couldn’t win, logically. The competition had been all fun and games, but this challenger was another story. No amount of support or hype could make up for such a gap; the bone deep certainty didn’t leave room for hard feelings. 
Struggling to catch his breath, battle shell against the wall, Donatello looks up from where he’s been getting some rest - not passed out rest, mind you. More like a beauty nap.
He lets out a genuine chuckle. 
Shigeo Kageyama is simply standing there, as he has been for most of the fight. 
“Sweet Marie Curie,” he puffs, keeping his voice level. The roar of the crowd hasn’t entirely died down, but he knows he is heard. “You don’t even have a scratch.”
The one they call Mob is giving him a stare. He still seems a little out of it. 
“You fought well,” he states calmly, and Donnie giggles. 
“Oh, please. I’ve been losing tournaments at home for as long as I can remember. You don’t need to feel sorry for me.”
At that, Mob flashes a grin. “I’m not sorry,” he says bluntly, coming over in lazy steps. “But it hasn’t been easy, either.”
He sits down, legs stretched out in front of him, and Donnie can now see that his breathing is a little heavy. He feels himself get cocky. 
“Well, I wasn’t about to just let you win. If I had to go down, might as well give ‘em a show, right?”
Mob sends him a sideway glance. “You really are all about dramatics.”
“What can I say?” Donnie sighs theatrically, proving his point. “This whole competition is about being swag. I could hardly disappoint.” 
“I don’t think you could," his opponent utters. “You’re very expressive.”
Donnie raises a perfectly drawn eyebrow. This is something he hasn’t often been told. He looks over to Mob, and the tension in the boy’s shoulders makes him hum in thought. 
“I don’t know who’s next, but you are going to crush them,” he provides. When Mob gives him a nonplussed glance, he goes on. “And even if you don’t, it’s still the last one. How good does that sound?”
“... it has been getting a bit much, to be honest.”
“Yeah, this is wild,” Donnie agrees. “Anyway, what are you gonna do with your trophy once you get it?”
Mob’s smile is a little shy, but he seems happy with the distraction. “I don’t know, actually. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten one. What would you do?”
“Well, you see, there was this one time I won the Lair Games…”
--------------------------
In the next room, a very proud sensei and three worried brothers are getting impatient. 
The student and the sibling don’t seem to care at the moment. 
The crowd is gone. 
The curtains are closed. 
The lights are off. 
For now, making small talk with a former rival is just enough.
--------------------------
EDIT: there is now a sequel!
YOOO IT'S BEEN SUCH A WILD RIDE
Disclaimer: I have never read/watched mp100 and I deeply apologize for making him probably very ooc. Just wanted to celebrate this beast of a match in my own way, which is wishing I could draw and deciding to heave words on a doc instead lol
CONGRATS ON MOB!! The final match between mp100 and undertale is gonna be soooo funny but I think Mob's gonna win this thing like it's nothing tbh (he has my vote at least)
@autismswagsummit thank you for reblogging all that Donnie propaganda, I genuinely think he never would've made it this far without the signal boost!
All my thanks to the Rise fandom for these past few days! You guys have made such powerful content and there's been so much hype I'm shocked. SHOCKED I TELL YOU
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quinn-pop · 1 year ago
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let’s do some autistic meta knight headcanons!! over explaining my interpretation of meta knight yet again wooooo
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this orb has NO idea how to talk to people!!! outside of work anyway. a lot of this is partially due to upbringing (suppressing his emotions all the time) but he does not know how to express emotions, like…at all.
this goes into a few things
1. yeah talking is hard. even after figuring out what he wants to communicate he will struggle. conversation can be so overwhelming, especially under pressure. he will need time lol
2. because of that, forming connections is hard. i really don’t think meta is much for shallow relationships, and certainly not early in the timeline. which also means he has very little experience with friendship. so a lot of the relationships he did have went kinda neglected, and issues that probably could’ve been worked on by talking became…*cough romk* escalated.
3. honestly i wouldn’t be surprised if meta convinced himself he couldn’t feel emotion (anymore) until like. katam-ish. he tried very hard lol
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vulnerability is terrifying. (though this gesture here is also just comforting, like his little cape cocoon thing he does.)
unmasking—yeah im taking the mask thing very literally here—is a big deal and a very slow process for mk. i’m sure he has a lot of feelings on that lol. it served as a way to ensure no one could ever, y’know, see him.
i can’t say i think he’d ever fully ditch it—there’s always gonna be some days that are more stressful than others and if having it could help him get through it, it just makes sense. mainly when working.
it really is about vulnerability. granted, i don’t think he has the most expressive face (in my head every astral just tends to stare at things) but i doubt he has much control over it. can’t fake a smile but also can’t hide it. probably blushes easy because yeah, astrals; just look at kirby’s face.
just the idea that someone might be able to read his expression and know what he’s feeling before he’s ready for them to (or even understands it himself…) yeah he doesn’t want that
but emotional turmoil aside, i think his mask also hides a lot of his stims
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remember that whole “suppressing your feelings” thing? yeah turns out that ignoring half your instincts isn’t a good idea. so in true meta knight style, he tries to stim as subtly as possible
1. he has the least control over his wings, so they will flick and twitch on their own. they’re usually a good indicator of how he’s feeling, not unlike the body language usually seen in cat ears and tails lol. flapping is also an extension of this of course, though he probably suppresses it more.
2. this also effects when he takes his wings out. pretty much every time he’s excited or nervous it just happens. kinda makes me wonder if his wing cape ordeal might also go into the suppression thing… (i’d say yes, but using a cape is also very comforting so it’s not necessarily a bad thing)
3. going back to the mask thing; he stims a lot underneath it. think like biting or pursing your lips. he bites his tongue and clicks his mouth. that sort of thing. his mask also makes it harder to notice that he is constantly sighing, humming, grumbling…all that
one nice thing about the mask though is that it helps a little bit with lights!!! woo
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(look at him and his magically floating glasses)
sensory stuff—i think he’s mostly bothered by light and sound. maybe a bit of texture. he’s pretty sensory avoidant and perfectly happy standing off to the side not touching anything.
the one exception to this is physical affection, which is, despite all of this, most of how he shows affection. it’s a lot easier to hug someone than to try to explain your feelings for them, after all.
i think he would like pressure though. so that’s probably part of it. and i’m pretty sure there’s some connection in here to fighting (dang, is that the only way he knows how to get his energy out?)
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anyway, pretty much all of this is in contrast to kirby, who i would gladly nominate as the champion of Doing Whatever He Wants. he might pick up a few bad habits, but he will never mask the way meta knight does. he might not understand how he feels, but he’s in tune enough to express it…usually.
this is a very good thing for meta because it helps him to do the same thing. kirby’s so energetic, it’s hard to not want to stim with him. it reminds meta to be kinder to himself and explore his own emotions. he can also help kirby understand themselves, so this connection is very important.
yeah, at the end of the day, everything kinda just boils down to kirby and mk as parallels
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this is the conclusion i promise
to me, meta’s arc is about growing stronger by growing kinder, and this is mostly by learning to be kind to himself. letting himself be a person again, loving and understanding other people, and eventually, letting go of all the expectations placed on him and doing the things he’s always wanted to do…
autism headcanons are fun for me because it’s cathartic to write, but at the same time, it just makes sense in this sort of narrative. meta is, to me, inseparable from these things. and so is kirby! that’s a dynamic that’s a lot of fun to play with, and it’s at the heart of my kirby interpretation.
if you actually read all this WOW thank you
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dammarchy211 · 2 days ago
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The Think Tank Random Headcanon List
Two people asked for this so that means it happening 👍 your welcome, most if not all of these r prewar/brain tank
-this one’s pretty supported in canon but think Dala likes fashion and dressing up🫶. I love giving her a fun little outfit
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Yay
-0 had back pains pre brain tank. Also a lot of fatigue. The certified professional sleeper. When he’s working on projects in his home he tends to do it lying on the floor.
-this one’s basically canon but 8 has arithmomania. I say basically canon bc things in his house in Higgs often come in sets of 8, as well as his house being the 8th house despite there not BEING 8 houses. I think this would also extend to counting to 8 on his fingers when he’s nervous and such.
-tied in I also believe 8 has ocd. Borous has bpd.
-Dala was pretty reserved growing up, as she grew up/especially in the looped personality she became for lack of better terms “bolder and more flirty” as compensation for having been so withdrawn previously.
-I am wishy washy with a lot of gender headcanons for characters, my brain kinda just goes well idk if they’re trans but they’re not Not trans. However I do feel quite definitively that Dala is nb transfem, and Mobius and 0 are trans men.
-I think all of their names have some tie to the names they had pre recursion loop. Canonically both Klein’s name and his prewar last name start with K. I think the other’s names have similar ties.
-on that note, I think Borous’s old name (/just his family in general) has Painfully Russian origins. It makes his McCarthyism thing so hilariously ironic
-I think 8 is Canadian, but he only lived there pre annexation of Canada, he was working at big MT and living at Higgs once it happened.
-0’s old last name used to be “O’something” and people still used to call him Dr. O then and he still hated it. Doomed fate
-re: Mobius being trans, i think his first name was Edward. He named himself after Dr. Morbius from the movie The Forbidden Planet
-Klein is a big wine guy, like obvious there’s wine bottles strewn about his house, but I mean like. He’s the kind of guy to just know things about every kind of wine.
-Klein is probably the best dressed after Dala, I think he just tries to be professional for the most part. 0 thinks he’s fashionable but he isn’t. Already mentioned but Mobius dresses like an old lighthouse keeper. Cableknit sweater and the works. I think he’d also like antique pipes
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I’m probably gonna alter the Klein outfit but yeah you get the idea. Doodles
-I feel SO STRONGLY ABOUT THIS. But 0 and Borous went to high school together. 0’s one line mentioning Borous in high school was just way too telling.
-Klein and Mobius need reading glasses. Dala used to need glasses, didn’t wear them throughout her childhood until like college, and then switched to contacts after college
-The think tank are all very close and got along much better prewar than they do at the time of the game. They kinda Jean-Paul Sartre No Exit’d themselves and their personalities are stuck in an endless loop. To say the least they started getting on each other’s nerves after 200 years. But this is to say they didn’t still bicker or anything prewar
-8 never really liked talking much. Possibly having selective mutism. This was mostly fine for him because pre brain tank you have facial expressions and hands and hand gestures that kinda make up for not talking at times. After the brain tanks he was kind just. Forced to talk to relay information. His speech was extremely awkward and stilted, which combined with the above head canon is why Dala made that comment about how they light him better now that his voice modulator is broken.
-they all have autism of some flavor tbh. To me. In my autistic mind.
-dead animal ment.// but I feel like Borous was that kid who like poked at dead squirrels and shit as a kid. It frames the Gabe and cyberdog thing well lol
-I’m an 8/0 head so I think they worked together a lot. Even if it’s not on the same project they would just do thinks at the same time together.
-the mentats on Klein’s bedside table are Mobius’s
-0 used to be a super big fan of House and RobCo when he was in high school. Obviously that is no longer true
-0 excels at making robots that are smaller. He doesn’t want to acknowledge this though. Muggy and his walking eyes (w/ wild wasteland) are both pretty small but they work well. The larger scale securitrons he’s tried to make obviously. Do not.
-I think the lounge music theme for the radio was a collective choice, but I feel like Dala especially likes music like that.
-Klein and Mobius used to play games like chess or checkers or card games “outside” in Higgs old person style.
-post brain tank one (woah) Klein has fleeting feelings of missing someone or something he can’t recognize. Any memories tying it to an image of a person he doesn’t quite remember. His brain just doesn’t connect that it’s Mobius and he usually just pushes the feeling down whenever it happens lol
If I think of more I’ll add them.
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thosebrothers · 2 months ago
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These old men just sit in my brain and fester. I have a lot of different ways I feel about Stan and Ford and their sexualities and how they explore it and what they think about it.
First thing is the times. I really don’t think that it’s the most welcoming. I also definitely think Stanley said homophobic shit. Honestly even as an older dude he might but he really doesn’t mean it maliciously. I have a very specific characterisation of this..
Bear with me here. I’m trying to get all my thoughts in order. When they are younger I definitely think that they’re both very weird about each other. They both recognise the way they feel is definitely more than brothers, I don’t know if this is a verbalised or not. It really really depends. I can see them messing around in their teenagers. It’s fun to think about but I also really enjoy that slow burn. Got to say, they got separated. It’s fucked up. I just know during pride month that Mabel mixed pronoun pins and pride flags for everybody she knows.(also does Ford even know that gay marriage is legal? LOL) Mabel would ask Ford if he was gay or bisexual or anything. He’d be so scared like “HOW DO THEY KNOW??” (It’s obvious dude look how you are with your brother) He would see pride decorations in the mystery shack and genuinely think Bill was fucking with him😭
With this being said I definitely know Mabel has asked Stan the same thing. He would basically explain that he is bicurious without admitting it. Like “yeah some dudes are pretty. What’s the problem? Doesn’t mean I’m sucking dick or anything” and then he sits in silence for thirty seconds about this LMAO..
Mabel would freak out and Stan would write it off. She’d be like “oh my God you’re literally describing bisexuality grunkle stan omgomgomgomgomg” Wendy is bisexual and the relationship I characterize between her and Stan I love it so much. He would straight up say dyke and Wendy would be like “fuck yeah Mr. Pines.” I know she is chronically bisexual, but I also think that she identifies as a dyke totally. Stan would be like “can you believe Mabel thinks I’m bisexual? Not everything’s gotta have a label. Whatever.” And Wendy is like “dude. It’s okay.“ and without directly saying we know you have the hugest crush on your brother, Stan knows. Stan knows that she knows. I think it’s sweet. Stan crushing hard on his nerdy brother.
But also genuinely does Ford know it’s OK to be gay?? he would see two men holding hands and just be like “in PUBLIC???” He is so repressed and has been gone for so long and in a. Horrific abusive relationship with a triangle. I just know his ass is like pulling Stanley aside whispering asking if Dippers a fag or not and Stan’s just like “idk idc probably”
Also I think they are all autistic. This doesn’t really have anything to do with anything… Well it kind of does. I feel like nurodivergent experiences of love can be very different than neurotypical ones. I love Stanford so much I need him to talk with his brother about the way they FEEL. UGH.
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snakeautistic · 11 months ago
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I love finding characters I can relate (/project onto) within media. There’s something so comforting about seeing yourself on screen. I end up headcanoning most of them to be in-line with my identities (lesbian, wasian, autistic) because they are literally me in my head!!
Anyway here’s a long ass list of my favorite characters and why I head canon them as autistic for fun!! If you have any others you’d like to add I’d love to hear them. (And please note this is just my interpretation, and highly based on my experience with autism. I’m not saying they’re definitely autistic or that all the traits I listed are the dsm-5 criteria or something.)
Princess Bubblgeum from adventure time:
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This girl is peak evil scientist autistic. Her intense need for control, the way she carefully observes the citizens she created, an outsider to them, not quite like them… god it’s so perfect. I read her as being somewhat low empathy as well, it’s hard for her to change her perspective to that of others. Plus the fact her brother neddy is a pretty obvious metaphor for higher supports needs autism. I think they of represent how autism runs in the family and appears in all sorts of different ways in different people. They’re sort of two different representations of the spectrum.
Marcy wu from amphibia
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I mean this one is just obvious. The biggest nerd of all time. So obsessed with her RPG special interest that she literally sucks her and her friends into a fantasy world. She’s clumsy (just like me fr), very smart but super socially awkward, a little oblivious and naive. She’s terrified of change, especially if it means abandoning the few social bonds she’s been able to make. I honestly find it hard to believe this wasn’t intentional.
Entrapta from she-ra
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Another pretty overt example. I do have some issues with how she was portrayed in the show- (keeping her on a leash was weird.) but overall I really love her. She understands her tech, not people, and it can cause her to come into conflict with other characters. Their treatment of her makes me sad at times, but it’s realistic. I also love some of her other quirks, her love of tiny food, her exitable demeanor, ect.
Pearl from Steven Universe
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Peridot is the more obvious example of an autistic character in SU, and while I agree she’s coded that way, I personally resonate more with Pearl. She is not very socially aware, and bothered by disruptions to her routine/ broader life changes. She doesn’t like to break rules (despite being a literal rebel lol.) I find it interesting how she seems to have the poorest understanding of life on earth out of the gems, despite having lived here for thousands of years. She is graceful, but has an almost sort of awkward gangly-ness to her that I relate to. Her neuroticism is also very similar to how my anxiety disorder presents.
Pearl has a tendency to infodump, without realizing those around her are uninterested. Even her relationship with Rose struck a chord with me. The hopeless devotion to her, the way she followed along at her side. It’s how many of my friendships have been. Obvious it’s not exactly the same considering Pearl having originally been her servant, but while not being an explicitly autistic trait, that sort of clingy, starstruck relationship is something autistic people are prone to developing. She does little hand stims at times too that I love to see.
Poison Ivy (specifically the version in the Harley Quinn animated show)
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I’m surprised I haven’t seen more people mention poison Ivy. Fiercely intelligent and deeply introverted, she isolates herself from all people, and only connects with and understands her plants. (Which her deep affinity for can definitely be read as a special interest.) She very overtly has trouble forming relationships with others.
She’s blunt, socially awkward and a loner, has something of a flat effect and a monotone voice. Those around her initially read her as cold and impersonable.Her struggle with social anxiety as well as intense fear of failure/ low self esteem is also very relatable to me. She also often struggles to express/understand her feelings and emotions. Her radical political ideas and the fact that she’s literally an ecoterrorist paints her as having a very strong sense of justice and a somewhat black and white worldview. (Me)
Finally, her relationship with Harley just SCREAMS neurodivergent solidarity. Harley Quinn is (I think canonically) adhd, and they’re both outsiders in the world that found each other and just… get each other. She’s Ivy’s closest and only friend and amazing girlfriend and god it’s all so perfect.
They remind me a lot of the relationship I have with my best friend with adhd except theirs is gayer.
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aaronymous999 · 1 year ago
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Y’know, I’m appreciating the abundance of Spider-Sona tag games recently- so I’m gonna be making my own here! Only 10 questions because I don’t want to go too wild with this one- or else we’d be here all day!
Spider-Sona 10 Questions!
What artstyle is your Spider-Sona’s world? ( For example, Gwen’s world is watercolor, Hobie’s world is inspired by punk art and punk album covers, etc. be creative! )
Do any characters that appear in the 616 or 1610 universes appear in your Spider-Sona’s world? If so, who and how are their roles different? ( For example, if Hobie Brown is in your universe, is he still the Prowler? Is Peter Parker in your universe? )
Is there a specific species of spider your Spider-Sona was bitten by, or was based off of? ( Can’t think of any specific canon examples here- but I’ve seen a lot of Spider-Sonas based off wolf spiders for example! )
What city and what time period does your Spider-Sona live in?
Is your Spider-Sona in the Spider Society? Were they ever asked to join but declined? Were they not scouted at all? Did they join and then quit? Tell me all about it!
Does your Spider-Sona have organic webbing, or do they use web-shooters? Mix of both? And is their webbing typical spider webbing, or does it have a style to it? ( For example, Miguel’s webbing being red and presumably digital. )
Very important question here- do they have any pets? And if so, do they ever take them out on their crime fighting missions?
Are they the only Spider-Person in their universe? ( For example, Miles and Peter co-existing in the Insomniac Games )
Are there things that exist in their universe but don’t in others? ( For example, Comic Con existing in Miles-42’s universe but not in 1610 Miles’s! Or certain Marvel superheroes existing in their universe but not others. )
And lastly ( For now will probably make a few more of these… honestly I could make one daily but I don’t wanna bother people lol ) what does your Spider-Sona think about killing criminals… and their general approach to crime.
Okay and that’s a wrap for this one! Let me know if you want more of these and how frequently you’d like them! If you aren’t tagged, you can still absolutely do this by the way, just gonna tag a few mutuals and people I follow who I know have Spider-Sona’s! Please let me know if you would not like to be tagged in the future- no hard feelings I’m just autistic and need things to be spelled out bluntly for me!
@spidey-bie @the-cat-and-the-birdie @brown-spider @autisticarach
( You know actually I don’t follow a ton of Spider-Sona blogs so if you come across this post and would LIKE to be tagged in future tag games please let me know in the reblogs or the replies! )
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cupcakeslushie · 10 months ago
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LITA MAY LITA MAY LITA MAY
Ok ok so I have like a bunch of questions feel free to ignore BUT
I) she has a tail. Is that a Kraang feature or do all the turtles in your universe have tails and hers is just extended?
II) Uh pink? Pink like Kraang? Did she choose her life colors, or???
III) Is. Is she. Is she autistic too
IV) Draxum-Hamato sooooo what does she call them? Did they argue about nicknames? Also was it Donnie’s choice to include Draxum’s name as well
V) Lita in the comics???
VI) Is there a reason her shell isn’t smooth like Donnie’s?
VII) What does she call Renet?
VIII) Ninpo question mark?
IX) Pupils! I love the way you draw her pupils. Is there a reason or is it just fun
X) Does she have a certain resistance to Kraang mind digging? Like that thing they did to interrogate Raph in the movie? To read his memories?
XI) So the cloak/scarf thing is Leo, the purple accents and stripes are Donnie, and the kneepads are Mikey. Any Raph references in her clothes?
Apologies if you’ve answered these before and I just didn’t see them! Have a good day and give Lita one too for goodness sakes girl’s had it rough already
1. It’s more of a Krang feature. I do love when the turtles are drawn with tails, but I didn’t do it from the beginning, and so for consistency sake in the EW universe I’ve held off. Maybe one day I’ll just say “fuck it” and give into the urge to give them all cute little tails. But even if I did, Lita’s would be much longer than any of the family’s (except Raph’s hypothetical tail lol).
2. Lita being albino and pink in the IDW comics pretty much made that Krang connection for me lol. I didn’t have to reach too hard with her design. She leans into it.
3. I have her personality very close to Leo’s canon personality, so she’s more on the ADHD side. She does have some sensory issues with sound, which a lot of ppl with adhd have (👋🏻). But being raised around the quiet and solemn Time Masters Sanctum it’s like really noticeable. When she visits the family, it can be very overwhelming, but rather than shutting down, she gets insanely riled up and can’t contain herself. It works though—everyone is more than happy to let her ramble on.
4. She never met either of them but Splinter of course would’ve been Jiji and Draxum would’ve been just Grandfather. Nothing too out of this world lol. And yes, Donnie chooses to embrace Draxum’s name.
5. Sorry idk what exactly this is asking. Like yes? Lita May is based off IDW Lita, from the comics 😅 sorry if I’m missing the question.
6. She is a spiny soft shell like Donnie, but yes, her spines are significantly more pronounced, thanks to, you guessed it!
7. Master Renet, or Aunty Ren in a more causal setting.
8. 🤫 we’ll see (I’m still trying to think of something cool and not too OP lol)
9. Her eyes are just for design fun, and to link her to Donnie some more!
10. That’s gonna be another big 🤫, but less because I haven’t decided and more just for the big spoilers! 😜
11. She’s kinda got two outfits atm and I think I might end up merging the two. Her simpler outfit of just her wraps and mask are very Raph coded, so I wanna figure out some sort of middle ground with the two.
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laikabu · 3 months ago
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Hi! I just uploaded the first two chapters of my labru baby fic 😭 I’m sorry I took so long!! Thank you for letting me write about your characters. I hope I did them justice. Also, my friend said you tweeted about my other fic! My twitter isn’t public, so I couldn’t respond, but thank you 🥰 https://archiveofourown.org/works/57795706/chapters/147102496
oh my god… its you! i really liked your other two fics so i’m really happy you wrote this so thank you omg. it has everything… very good kabru inner thoughts… kabru and marcille tension… falin very clearly being the kids’ favorite… mithrun epic divorce guy… kabru slipping back into formal speech as a defense response… old man sappy autistic sex…
anyway, my thoughts in case people want to read it and dont want to be spoiled, it’s quite long LOL
this was such a nice read!!! i was always curious how people would characterize my fankids n you did it really well!! pumori being fussy toddler and makalu going through his rebellious phase… kabru being worried he’s turning into milsiril with how he’s harsh on his son… also kabru being nosy… pumori calling her older brother lu…
i also loved how you characterized laios in this, he’s always so intuitive of caring for those he loves when he’s aware something is wrong, coaxing it out of kabru in his own weird way to figure out how he could help…
makalu being fascinated with death is a really interesting angle. he was born in a former dungeon where death was forbidden. he’s fascinated with monsters and lives with a father who loved monsters but repelled them and another father who wanted nothing to do with them, relieved that he brought children into this world safe from ever encountering them… not ever expecting that one of his kids will grow up to actively want to see monsters
i really like the part where makalu and his friends were bothering mithrun, because he would totally do that. i haven’t put it into text yet but i always imagined him admiring mithrun because pattadol(who he liked to bother because he was fascinated by her fairy) hyped him up, meanwhile mithrun just found him a little annoying. i also really liked that you pointed out his dry sense of humor, because he does have that in canon and i don’t see a lot of people play around with it
i can’t wait to find out what falin and makalu talked about! and what spell he was learning… ahhh
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