#I want to scream I feel like I had one too many shitty things happen in my brain and now I’m cursed to be a fuck up until I inevitably kill

[milo-is-rambling]

Huge shoutout to everyone who was too mentally fucked up to succeed in high school but they were smart when the meds worked and when everything was okay but the second something went wrong you went back to not caring and letting yourself fail and now you’re watching everyone go to college and gain skills and friends and go new places and you’re still in the the same (or worse) shitty mental place you were four years ago and you feel like you aren’t allowed to ever be successful because you dropped out of high school and you can’t even imagine paying to take a college course.

[weedpallor]

Wrong girl made right -ch1

Mob Wandanat x reader

18+

Summary-your walking to work one day and you get kidnapped being mistaken for someone else but they can’t just let you go now can they and your too cute to kill

Warnings:murder, mafia, mean wandanat, mob wandanat, mommy kink, daddy kink, guns, manhandling, manipulation, forced relationship, dark wandanat, reader is a big baby, wandanat threaten her with death

Photo is ai

You were walking around the city heading to a local bar, you lived in one of the most dangerous cities in the country, it was full of mafias, gangs and all around awful people. you had learned to fit in and just go with the flow. It was never easy growing up in a foster home you had parent they just werent good ones so you ended up being placed in a shitty foster home and it was honestly worse then living with your parents. the forster home was a mess there was too many kids and always fights, the house was just pure chaos. Once you had turned 18 though you had started your own life away from being a scared little child. you worked in a bar the one you were heading to now it was a fairly chill bar not many issues happened and your boss was super cool.

As you made your way through a dark alleyway that leads to the bar you work at the alleyway was filled with homeless and beggars you smiled at them hating that fact you couldn’t help more but quickened your pace wanting to get out of the dark cold alleyway it smelt grim and made your stomach turn on a daily basis but it had begun to be normal for you.

Once you reached the exit of the alleyway you took a deep breath of relief, the semi fresh air refreshing your lungs it was refrshing being out of that alley it smelt like things that you never thought you would have to smell walking to work.

Suddenly you felt large viney hands on you and a blacl silk bag placed securely over you head you thoughts were going while as you thrashed around trying to break free from the people holding you they seemed to be men based there strength, you were terrified all that was going though your mind was `am I gunna die?` `whos grabbing me?` `WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?` questions flooded your mind to the point you were dizzy.

You screamed out loudly but a hand quickly clamped down on your head and an object was smacked across the back of your head.

The little light you could see slowly darkened as you lost consciousness and went limp in the arms that were holding you tightly. The last thing you could feel was being dragged across the rough ground and being shoved into what you would assume was a vehicle.

When you next woke up your head was spinning the pain blossemed from the back of your head where you were hit to the sides and front it felt like it shot though your head like a bullet. You could barely even lift you body let alone head. You tried to lift your hands to your head, the pain blossoming and increasing as your worries got worse. You wanted to ease the pain but you found that your arms and legs were bound to the chair you were sitting on. The bag was still placed on your head stopping you from looking around at where you were but you could tell it was cold because your entire body was shaking and shivering. The room was freezing the room was so cold it was as if the cold was seeping into your bones. `who the fuck likes rooms this cold` you thought.

You tried struggling against the restraints, you couldn’t free yourself but you had managed to get the bag off your head by tilting your head down and shaking your head intensely ,making the bag fall to the ground softly, your eyes widened in shock as you saw the room you were in.

It was a spacious room but it was cold and empty other then a few hooks on the wall that look as though they are to suspend a person, you eyes continue to travel around the room it was dirty and there was old splatters of blood on the floor your face turned to disgust and fear as you saw a tray next to you filled with knifes and guns and multiple torture weapens your mind raced with questions ‘where am I? Who’s house is this? What did I do? Am I going to die.’ Your thoughts were running a million miles per houryour mind was swimming with bad thoughts and confusion.

Suddenly the door swings open to reveal a fairly tall woman with long beautiful auburn hair her hair was like silk. She was beautiful. You were stunned by her beauty.

The woman looked familiar. She looked like- oh shit she was Wanda Maximoff she and her wife run one of the most feared mafias you had heared all the rumours and stories of them even seen faint photos of the women. Your jaw goes slack your mouth open in shock ‘what could you have done to piss off a mafia boss’ you thought as she started walking over.

Wanda looked at you when she had first walked in the room she realised you were the wrong girl she had been wanting the girl who had hacked into their system she was frustrated that you weren’t the girl she had been hoping to tournament but she saw something in you she continued walking towards you her eyes shimmering with something unknown to you.

Wanda slowly assess you looking you up and down “hm your cute what’s your name sweetie”

Wanda thinks for a moment looking into your eyes she wasn’t going to let you go but she was deciding what she was going to do with you.

Wanda lifted your chin making you look at her. You stared up at her nervously opening and closing your mouths a few times before speaking “I-I im y/n a-are you gonna….let me go” you ask fearful of what she might reply with.

Wanda pulls away slowly “no. Sweet girl I’m not”

You look at her confused as to why she said it so confidently “but I didn’t do anything wrong why am I here” you say angrily your voice lased with confusion and frustration you were getting annoyed and because of that most rational thouhts left your brain.

Wanda’s eyes narrow at you “don’t speak to me like that” her accent drips through slightly she softens her gaze taking a deep breath “you are here because my men made a mistake and got the wrong girl but you my sweet….” She leans in and grabs your chin again “you are adorable and I want you I want to own you”

You start struggling in the chair you are restrained in “let me out you phyco” you spit at her.

Anger flares in Wanda’s eyes “stop.” She says firmly her tone making you stop. “Now don’t be a brat I can still blow your brains out” she picks the gun up and taps it on your temple threateningly.you were starting to realize you were dumb for trying to argue with her

When you look at her totally shocked she smirks and starts speaking “now you wouldn’t want that would you” the barrel of the gun gets trailed down the side of your face making a tickling sensation wanda brings the tip of the gun to your lips.

She smirks at you with a predatory gaze “open.” She demands taping the gun against your lips impatiently, she was not one to say something twice.

You open your mouth reluctantly and slowly your lips parting far to slowly for the slovakian so she shoves the barrel of the gun into you mouth quickly making you gag around it and start trying to pull away in panic. you were shocked by the suddendness and panic fills your eyes you looked up at wanda pleadingly.

Wanda looks you in the eyes her eyes blow out leaving barely any colour to be seen “god Natasha is going to love you, your just adorable aren’t you” she pushes the gun further into your throat making you gag louder.her smirk got biggershe brushes her thumb across your cheek gently.

She pulls the gun away slowly and looks down at the now covered in saliva gun “awe did baby make a mess oh no” she wipes the end of the gun on your cheek before placing it on the tray beside you “now sweet thing I have to go deal with the idiot who brought you here so I need you to drink this water for me need to make sure your hydrated before I leave” she says a untrustworthy smile plastered on her face.you could barely tell she was lying but her smirk made you not want to believe her.

She opens the bottle of water and puts the drink near your lips “drink or I can knock you out with my bare hands” she says seriously making you realize it definately wasnt water. You take a large gulp of the water not wanting to be knocked out with force the water flows down your throat it tasted horrible making your face screw up in disgust.

Your eyes shimmer with tears “what’s in that”. Wanda let’s out a small laugh seeing your disgusted face she was definately how the stories made her sound.

“That water, my darling has zolpidem in it, it will help you sleep while I figure out who you are and get Natasha informed” she says as she smiles at you with fake sympathy as if she didn’t just drug you Wanda was already planning of ways she is going to corrupt your innocence and make you her compliant little doll.

You slowly feel your head begin to get dizzy and it drops to the side tilting onto your shoulder “you're not going to hurt me right?” You say in a muffled voice worried that you wouldn’t wake up again.

Wanda let’s a laugh ripple through her as she watched you begin to get dizzy “um not yet, I won’t as long as you behave” she gently strokes your hair as you body goes limp in the chair she was smiling down at you maybe she did have a sweet side `unlikely` you thought.

Your vision starts to blur and everything begins to go black but Wanda’s hand on your hair stroking your hair is slightly grounding and helping you panic less.

You slowly start to wake up you don’t know know long it had been but your head was hurting 10 times more now and your vision was blurry to the point you couldn’t make out anything in the room.

Once you started to come to your senses you noticed you were no longer in the cold room at on that hard uncomfortable chair but instead you were in a warm cosy bed you managed to lift your head of the mountain of pillows and mutter to yourself “wow these lot are rich holy crap” you looked around the luxurious room it was massive it was probably bigger then your entire apartment.

You attention focus on a letter on the bedside table you look closely at it and pick it up the letter says:

“I’ll be back soon stay where you are sweet girl”

You looked around the massive room it was hard to focus your eyes but you could tell they were rich the room had a massive kings size bed, placed in the middle of the room up against a wall the bed was a dark grey colour it was a pretty bed and looked extremly expensive there are two night stands on the side of the bed they were a black colour that complimented the grey well the walls were a dark shade of grey as well, on the left side of of the room there was a vanity placed next To a door labeled unsuite

"rich bitches" you mumbled. you turned your head to the other side of the room as you switched sides you noticed a big tv facing the bed, drifting your eyes to the right there was two more doors one labeled closet and the other had no label but a small pad lock "why’s it on the inside" you thought it was the way out but whne you looked back to the tv there was a door next to it with a hand print scanner to get out and in it looked as though it was also on the other side of the door you decided that was the main door to the bed room but what was the other mysterios door you wondered

suddenly you head food steps walk towars the room the door next to the tv was definately the main door to enter and leave then you realized "shit someones coming" you plopped your head down and pretended to be asleep.

The door beeps as the hand is placed on the other side of the door suddenly you hear two voices one you remembered as Wanda’s.

“She’s so cute nat I just wanna ruin her” you hear wanda say in a excited voice

“Well show me then” what you assumed was Natasha’s voice was rough but also very smooth sounding she said it with a playful tone.

“Look at her her names is y/n y/l/n isn’t she cute” Wanda says playfully “she’s like a little doll oh and she’s pretending to be asleep”

Your eyes widen in shock. ‘Oh no’ you thought you yourself.

“Princess, show Natasha your pretty face and stop hiding….Now.” Wanda demands in a cold tone her playfulness leaving her voice

Slowly you sit up your mind was filled with fear you didn’t want to get up but you was scared what would happen if you didn’t you looked up at them both fear filling your eyes.

“Why hello.” Natasha says in a cruel tone filled with fake sympathy.

You shake a little out of fear “ar-are y-you n-na-nat-Natasha?” You ask your voice is shakey and quiet.

Natasha smirks “I am sweet thing Wanda has told me all about you” she says with a fake sweet voice it’s sounds wrong in her mouth the voice makes your cringe but it also adds to your fear she was not a nice person you though.

“Bu-bu-but s-sh-she doesn’t know me” you say in confusion what would she have to tell Natasha other then your name.

Wanda speaks up her voice as smooth as velvet it radiated confidence “I know everything about you my sweet. Everything” this made you more scared then you were which you didn’t think was even possible

“H-how?” you say quietly your mind was hurting with how much you were thinking.

“She has her ways of finding things out” Natasha says she sounded bored of the topic like she didn’t want to talk about it anymore. “Now let’s get onto rules”.

A few hours later they had told you the many rules they have for you (*let me know if you want me to write what the rules would be*) it was a long list and you were going to stuggle to remember they had shown you around there home it was barely a home it was massive and seemed cold other than a few rooms Wanda’s office was the best room it was homey with books and painting on the walls but there was a modern theme to it making it seem dark they said you weren’t allowed in the basement which confused you.

The two decided to give you mostly free roam around the house other then certain areas and on certain days they informed you the building was heavily guarded and there was lots of gates and locks so you wouldn’t get out even if you tired plus they would find you no matter where you was, this all made you fear the women a lot more then you should.

After the tour you were sat in the bedroom you was originally in you was informed it was in-fact your personal room and you could change it up a little if you behaved will you?… you still didn’t know what the strange door was for it made you curious and anxious to know. The two locked you in the room for the night saying they would see you in the morning.

You were sat at the massive vanity playing with the various items in the draws when you looked up and noticed a camera in each corner of the room “great” you mumbled to yourself huffing you felt useless you couldn’t do anything you were stuck forever unless you manage to escape….

You started trying to come up with plans to get out and how you would get away from these phycos and there cruelty.

After a bit you started getting tired so you walked over to the wardrobe hoping there was some clothes there and surprisingly there was a few a note was attached.

“We will go shopping soon but for now these will do unless you want to walk around bare ;)” the note was unsettling you put the clothes on they were comfortable but were a bit big on you never the less you climbed into bed and tried sleeping.

After a few hours of crying and struggling to sleep out of fear and anxieties you slowly drifted off and fell asleep.

the next morning you woke up feeling like crap your head was in so much pain ou was on the verge of tears, your eyes were puffy from crying all night, your mind was swimming in worries and anxities you felt like pure crap.

as you were sitting up you heared the beep fron the door lock and wanda walked in swaying her hips she was full of confidence and it made you feel slightly attarcated to her no no no you cant think that. wanda gave you a evil smile "good morning baby looks like youve been crying" she says cruely it was more of a statement than a question. you stayed quiet not knowning how to respond she was very confusing did she want you to speak or not? you thought.

Wanda smirked whne you didnt reply "right little lady, up you get. go shower and brush your teeth, there will be some clothes waiting on your bed for when your done oh and if you come out looking like youve been crying i wont be happy" she threats.

you nod and stand up on shakey legs as you start walking pass wanda she suddenly grabs you and pulls you up flush against her

you blushed hard then wanda connected her lips to yours she kissed you with alot of force but it sent sparks shoting though you when her lips connected to yours as she pulls away you were as red as a tomato she smirked seeing you flustered and out of breath

she pushes you towards the unsuite "go shower natasha is waiting downstairs” she says playfully.

You walk into the bathroom.

Authors note:sorry this is short Ive only just started writing on my laptop hope you like it there is a few mistakes I’m sorry let me know any tips in the ask box if you have any please <3 lmk if you want a part 2 :)

[bloop-bl00p]

In defense of Octavia

TW: Lots of Trauma Dumping, Mention of abuse

She’s been wronged way too many times in this fandom for some reason. Look at her vibing, how can you hate her?

I’m a fan of Helluva Boss, mainly because of its potential but the quality dropped dead in the second season. We’re gonna talk about a character I’ve seen other fans misinterpreting in favor of the so-great Prince Stolass.

I want to talk about her mainly because I do what I want and because after studying her character I just realized that she’s just like me. Especially regarding her relationship with her father, I see myself in my younger years.

All of that to say…

She has all the right to feel abandoned.

Octavia obliviously has a stronger bond with her father, it shows in her behavior and little background details

When she wants to draw her family, she draws her and Stolas, we mostly see her being happy with him which leads me to think that she’s emotionally neglected by Stella. To her, Octavia is just an ‘egg’ that fell off her and she doesn't care about the impact killing Stolas could have on her daughter.

Despite being emotionally absent, Stella has a much more physical presence than Stolas. Most of the time Stolas is alone in his castle which leads me to think that Octavia is somewhere else with Stella. They did mention the two went on a weekend somewhere. This leads us to this question…

How can Octavia feel more close to her father?

Here’s the thing, I see a lot of my family dynamic here. My mom doesn’t pay attention to me at all, she doesn't want me to bother her and she makes it clear. My dad, however, who’s absent like 90% of the time, always tried to spare time with me. He explained to me that he was working and why he was doing all of this (I was like barely ten) but it never prevented him from trying to play with me, sharing his hobbies, going on a walk, and else.

He was there emotionally and, as a kid who was bullied, had no friends at all, and a mother who didn't give a damn, I cherished this relationship.

I believe the exact same thing happened with Octavia, we never see her with friends or even outside the castle, she’s isolated. Stolas has Prince duties, we’ve seen him carry them in the shows, hence why he’s mostly absent leaving her with her mother. But, at least when she was a kid, he tried to do stuff bringing her to Loo-Loo Land or being the one to comfort her. That is why she clings to her father, he’s the only one who actually shows her love and she’s terrified of losing that.

Regarding her mother, Stella obliviously doesn't care about her so the feeling is reciprocated. From a narrative standpoint, Stella is an unpredictable force of nature getting angry for pretty much anything that doesn't go her way. So Octativa learned to not cross her mother's path.

I know this expression, this is the “Oh fuck… they’re at it again?” she’s used to her mother's constant screaming, she's used to her parents fighting.

She did say they were a time when a parent didn't hate each other, which to me refers to the time when Stolas tanked Stella’s abuse. But, that doesn’t mean that Stella wasn't abusing him in front of a younger Octavia, she’s erratic and they did imply that she can get physical in her toxic behavior. Since Stella was passive, it was probably mostly harmful comments.

Putting personal things here, my mom was also very abusive to my older sibling. Since I was extremely young I learned not to ‘be a burden’ to avoid being abused as well, which includes things like not talking to her unless she does it first. Whether Octavia is aware of the physical abuse or not, she must know enough to know that it’s a bad idea to annoy Stella.

This is the only picture where we see her seemingly having a good relationship with Stolas, which to me feels like she’s faking it considering all we know about the family.

She has a pretty shitty household but her relationship with her father make it bearable until Stolas did a 180°

He randomly started to prioritize Blitz and don’t spill me the bullshit of ‘he’s trying’ he stopped trying long ago.

Let’s analyze this episode by episode:

In Loo Loo Land, Stolas seemingly tries to rebuild a visibly strained relationship with his daughter by bringing her to a park she liked when she was a kid. To this, she immediately responds with an “I’m not 5 anymore.” and an “I rather kill myself.” There’s no room for miscommunication, she doesn't want to go there, and she won’t enjoy it as much as she did back then. Still, he decides to go there, showing that he doesn't listen, and, he brings the one the thing that is currently ruining his already horrible marriage because of his own actions. Blitzø.

He’s trying to spend time with his daughter after a long time (this is mentioned in the episode) and he decides to bring in that one guy he’s hooking up with to deliberately make sexual remarks about him in front of her.

She’s uncomfortable the whole time, not just because she allegedly doesn’t like listening to her father's comments but because she doesn't like the park. She said it, yet Stolas doesn't acknowledge it, he doesn't realize the faces she makes which are to me pretty communicative of her annoyance and discomfort.

This is not even subtle body language, yet he only notices it when she runs off. The worst part is that he still finds a way to think about Blitzø when his daughter leaves.

He looked upset that Blitzø didn't follow him! Did he expect that guy to pursue him constantly? He was in the middle of an argument with his daughter, I personally would have stepped away to give them space to talk and reconcile. But no, apparently Blitzø should be at his beck and call all the time.

But you know what, after all of this. He still apologized. That absolutely does not negate everything he did during the day but, at the end of it, he finally listened to her and even brought her to a place she actually wanted to be. Which is good, he acknowledged her discomfort and did something she liked.

Until Seeing Star.

Look I know Stolas was busy with Stella but he clearly doesn't care about her and her stuff.

Don’t tell me he couldn’t pinpoint Stella’s location with magic and teleport all of her belongings to her. Their discussion was barely about the furniture, he could have said that they were gonna be delivered and hung up the second he saw Octavia. Arguing with Stella is pointless, he’s the number one guy that should know that! Why does he continue to insult her, he’s just fuelling the fire!

Moving out her belongings would have been 10 times faster if he just hung up the phone, then he could have had a more mindful talk with Octavia without the constant bickering of his ex-wife.

But he didn't for some reason, fair enough, I guess. The writers do whatever they want. Anyway, Octavia got angry and ran to go see the stars on her own.

So, Stolas’ castle is in Pride but my point still stands, Octavia had the time to run from home and make the way all from her father's place to the city, find the specific building Blitzø held his organization in and Stolas didn't notice a thing.

You cannot tell me Stella managed to get his attention for that long AND you cannot tell me that his castle is close to the shitty disaffected building and the populace. His daughter ran off and he did not notice a thing.

Not only that but he has the nerve of blaming Blitzø for not watching the book. Like, dude! You should have watched your daughter instead!

Then he spills out more bullshit.

I don’t know Stolas, how could you possibly find her when you were shown to have countless abilities to do so?

Like bubbles projecting the image and locations of people.

Or that on time when you possessed corpses and one woman just to go full eldritch monstrosity just for one that one guy you’re cheating your wife with. And don’t whine about “They don’t love each other.” it’s still affecting his family, mainly his daughter so it’s still bad.

Of course, you do all of that without your grimoire without any problem, brushing it off with a…

I guess he forgot his ‘ways’ when it came to Octavia. But honestly, Loona literally found her easily just by looking at her Instagram account, couldn't he just call her or something? The girl had her phone the whole time and he didn't just think of calling her.

Me when I forget that I have teleportation power when I am in an enclosed space with nobody is looking.

You’re certainly not worrying right now. Via literally told him to his face that she was scared and he kept flirting with him even though he once again caused her to run away because of his neglect.

He’s not trying his best, THIS IS NOT TRYING!

No Loona, his daughter communicated very clearly issues related to their relationship, rather than reassuring her and being there for her as much as it’s realistically possible (he still has duties to carry), he gets in an avoidable petty fight with his ex and keeps an unhealthy dynamics with an imp he's been obsessing over. He doesn't focus, his priorities aren’t straight, and now Octavia feels abandoned.

I did mention that I had a good relationship with my father back then, but it stopped abruptly. His focus changed and he went out with friends after work and gradually stopped spending time with me. Until we never spent time together again, (to give you an idea the only moment where I could see him was in the morning for breakfast) now that can sound silly but I was a child, with no friends and a neglectful mom, losing the only good thing I had in life broke me. I knew his schedule, I knew he was spending time with work buddies and that just stung my self-esteem even more leaving me feeling like a burden when I was just a kid who wanted to feel love.

This is why I don’t like the “He’s trying.” I know what a trying struggling parent looks like and I know what happens when they stop. If you keep trying to do something and you’re constantly failing, either your technique isn’t the right one or you’re not and you’re convincing yourself you are.

And then there are people that’ll tell me that “He lived through the abuse of Stella for years for her.”

If you read all of this then I don’t feel like I need to explain how Octavia was at least partially exposed to Stella's toxic behavior and was affected by it.

For those who don’t know how it feels to live with an erratic mood-swinging person, it’s pure constant stress. You have to think constantly before you talk or move because you know that if you fuck up you’re gonna pay the price. And if you still eventually mess up you can never know with these types of people! You can’t defend yourself because the punishment will be far worse. You are ALWAYS in the wrong.

So he lived through the abuse of Stella just so his daughter could get neglected and abused in a less physical way?

The difference between my parents and Octavia is that they love each other. Stolas doesn't give a damn about Stella, he did say he was nice at first because he empathized with her they were in this shitty situation together, and fine, it's reasonable. But she never changed! Stella stayed the same! Why didn’t he leave her when he stopped carrying about her?! There’s no trauma bounding, Stella isn’t guilt-tripping or manipulating him, they got the child he could have divorced her easily without consequences! If anything, she’s the losing part of this divorce she’s lower in the hierarchy! “Andreaphul will get angry.” HE’S A MARQUIS! Hierarchically speaking Stolas is far more important and he mopes the floor with his peacock ass!

Am I supposed to be empathetic with that one dude who willingly let his daughter grow up in a hyper-toxic environment with an emotionally neglectful and unpredictable wife?! Am I supposed to believe he cares when he kept sleeping in his house in his bed with the same guy his daughter clearly is worried he’s going to leave her with?! Really?!

Don’t ever tell me that this is trying.

[idkfitememate]

Mora is a God’s Best Friend Pt. 1

♡︎ « Next Part ⋙

૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა Pairings : GN! Mora Reader x Liyue

૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა W.K. : 4.6k

໒꒰ྀིᵔ ᵕ ᵔ ꒱ྀི১ Tags/CW&TW : Fluff, crack, reader is slightly angry, only slightly tho I promise :)

Now, you wouldn’t say you were a greedy person… which would be a huge lie because holy shit you were compared to a dragon by your friends more times than your own mother said she loved you-

When you got your paycheck - which was a very handsome paycheck mind you - you hoarded that to the best of your abilities, but when you saw something you had to have? Bought. Spent all your cash on it.

… You have to many plushies-

You weren’t exactly an avid believer in the whole “money makes the world go around!” thing, but it certainly helped. Like, have you seen how happy Elon Musk is? That bitch living the life and you want that too.

But despite your adoration to money…

THAT DID NOT MEAN YOU WANTED TO BE IT!!

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🎂🍩🍰୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

When you woke up from a nice nap after a long day of hard labor- I mean work, you couldn’t see. You also couldn’t feel your arms or legs or… well anything in general that one would say when describing their body.

You did have your five core senses though, which is nice. Well… minus sight-

You couldn’t move, and whenever you would scream the people you heard around you - their voices were muffled… were you in a pouch?? - did nothing to help.

You continued for what you assumed to be hours, never once paying mind to the fact that you never got hungry or thirsty or ran out of breath. Then you felt warmth.

Something large and warm wrapped around your form which scared the shit out of you because as far as you were concerned, you were still very human sized. You continued to scream into the darkness as you listened to the… transaction (???) going on above you and-

Wait a minute. You recognized that voice.

A lot of your money went to Genshin Impact in your day, you were what was known in the fandom as a “whale”, did I mention you got payed handsomely?

Yeah it was enough the basically be a sugar parent for all your friends.

So you heavily related to a certain character who was constantly characterized as helping another with his money problems.

Can you guess who it is?

I’ll give you five seconds to guess!

5…

4…

3…

2… fuck it I hate the suspense-

It was Childe!

And hearing his voice above you shattered what you may have thought was happening to you. Yes you may or may not have thought you were being kidnapped-

You then felt yourself get placed on another warm surface and oh god-

“All repairs will be made in a timely manner! Thank you for the patronage!”

You flipped through the air with a small ‘whoosh’ and landed back in the hand.

… WERE YOU FUCKING MORA?????

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨���🍫🍪୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

Being merged to a weapon wasn’t fun.

Well at the very least you weren’t “merged” with a weapon. For some reason the blacksmith couldn’t find a way to use your specific mora body to upgrade Childe’s bow.

So there you sat as a glorified decoration. Right on the front of the bow.

But you did find something out, the second you felt yourself attach to the bow, you could suddenly see! And you could very tell that you were in Liyue, which made sense. And when you coughed on accident, the blacksmith jumped and looked around, before shrugging and turning back to her work, which meant you could now be heard as well!

All five senses back baby!

Only shitty thing was that you couldn’t move on your own, and you now noticed you were no longer hungry nor need to breathe, as well as sleep.

So you were stuck.

For four days.

Unable to speak or move.

I mean, you were still figuring out your existence yourself, no need to get anyone else involved with the process since you were beyond confused.

You’ve read the Isekai stories - and fanfics - but you had never read one personally about being isekaied as money. Yes, you have seen the vending machine one. And the one where he gets turned into a dummy ASMR head mic-

Not the point!

You were just trying to figure out how to… exist (?) like this. Which was pretty hard when coming to terms with the fact that you’d never eat your favorite foods again.

Never again…

“Thank you so much for choosing our services sir! Have a nice day!”

You were suddenly picked up and placed in the gentle care of Childe - ironic sentence I know - and off you both went.

You want to know what a weird sensation is?

Being a bow and feeling someone pluck your string.

Now yeah, that sounds super sensual but it felt more like someone… pulling your hair?? You couldn’t really place it but that was honestly the closest equivalent. Feeling him rub his hands all up and down your… body (?????) was a new experience to. Again, not sensual, just ticklish? And it sucked trying not to giggle-

God this was weird and confusing.

“Well I’m free for some time… I’m sure a little practice won’t hurt…”

Oh good god you could not catch a break.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍧🍮🍬୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

A new fear had been unlocked within you.

You, a piece of mora crudely attached to a psychopathic killers bow, had just been de-summoned.

And it hurt.

BAD.

No one will ever know what that was like, the feel yourself fading, every atom slowly falling away into nothingness, and then the silence. That cursed silence. Deep dark blackness was what you felt for what appeared to be thousands of years to your still human brain.

Never again would allow yourself to feel that pain.

As you were summoned, you continued to stare off into the distance, coming to terms with what you had just witnessed while ignoring every word that came out of Childe’s mouth.

Something or other about practicing you couldn’t give a shit.

You only watched the changing scenery around you as you and Childe wandered aimlessly through a forest.

Then he dropped to his knees suddenly, which cause you to silently curse and sputter in shock.

Did you mention you got good at that? Being silent? Because you did.

Being that you were placed on the front of the bow, you could see perfectly where he was aiming, that being a small bird that you had to squint - how you squinted? You don’t know - to see.

It was ridiculously far away, covered in leaves. You were also slightly scared because Childe was being silent.

Childe. Silent.

Not two words you ever expected to put into the same sentence - again - but here you were.

You felt the bow string being pulled back, and him lining up the shot.

Then, you felt something course through you.

Obviously it was the Hydro infused arrow he knocked onto the string, but something else flowed through you.

You could feel yourself reaching, trying to connect with something to better control this sudden power flow, and then you found a great source.

His Hydro Vision.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍰🍡🍪୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

Childe was a seasoned soldier and fighter, literally anyone who met him could tell you that.

He kept that fact near and dear to his heart, that fact being why he fought so hard, to become stronger and finally find that fight that would be the end of him.

He longed for the day where he would be strong enough to fight his mentor, and weak enough to die at someone who he saw worthy enough to end his stories and legacy.

… Legacy was such a funny word to the man as all he could think of when it was spoken was his second, stronger form, Foul Legacy. Ironically, that’s what he though historians would call his stories in the far future - he would never admit how close it was due to the Electro Delusion that sapped away at his life, slower due to his strength but sucking away his soul nonetheless - would call it, a Foul Legacy.

He was self-aware enough to understand that people hated him, yet oblivious enough to leave his family in the hands of The Rooster, a man known for leveling cites before they even had the chance to riot against himself and the Tsaritsa.

He was complex in the same way he was so easy to understand.

Just as how he allowed the world to see his Vision but kept his Delusion hidden.

Just recently he had gotten his bow repaired after a… well not a hard mission more so than it was annoying.

And by the Archons it was beautiful! Any and all scratches and marks had been repaired, a new layer of pain was an added, a stronger string was restrung into it and just… mmm she was beautiful.~

The finishing touch was the little golden emblem stuck directly on the front. So shiny and pretty…

He just had to take it for a test run!

Nothing too big or anything, just a little hunting as he hadn’t indulged himself recently. Just a couple small birds or mammals nothing anyone would notice.

… No that isn’t a human corpse nu uh ya stupid-

Besides that wasn’t with his bow! That was with his blades it doesn’t count!

But anyway, he quickly spotted his first target of the day, a little finch, and aimed.

He noted that his bow, while still heavy, felt much more sturdy and the current string was stronger than his last, most likely due to the whole “new string” thing rather than being better because that old string had weathered a lot.

He quickly knocked his first arrow and took a silent breath in, calming his shaking hands and the butterflies in his stomach. Of course neither were from fear or nervousness rather than they were from excitement and dare I say ecstasy. A smile forceably carved itself into him skin as he watched how easily Hydro infused itself with his arrow.

Though almost immediately after, he felt a sudden surge of power coming from not him nor the arrow, but the bow itself.

Specifically the small golden piece sitting front and center.

This was either an unknown or well known fact depending on who you asked, but the bow was Childe’s worst used weapon. He was much more skilled with a blade - like his duel Hydro blades or the duel-bladed polearm he wielded as Foul Legacy - and he even had some experience with a catalyst, but bows just seemed so.. cowardly. Even with his catalyst he was near to his opponents as its attacks were based on his fighting style, but he personally believed that bows were for the cowardly.

Those who wanted to fight but were too weak to even dare step foot onto a battlefield.

At least that’s what he thought before Capitano shoved a bow into his arms as he complained about needing something more to do. A new challenge.

And it opened his eyes.

Bows were not for the weak rather that they were for the stealthy. Something Childe was not the best at.

He was honestly more of a ‘punch more and talk later’ kind of guy. But the bow was forcing him to learn and grow, which was more than welcome in his book.

But this power was not something he had accessed yet. Hell, he’s barely felt anything like it with any other of his weapons. Closest he has ever gotten to this kind of power would be with Foul Legacy, and even then it’d be a stretch.

He’d even have the gall to say he could never feel this kind of power from his Master.

He watched as the area he sat in was bathed in a blue glow was his Vision and the arrow he still held grew brighter and brighter. With that, a gold shined through as the small golden piece on his bow - which now that he looked closer looked almost exactly like a piece of mora, just with the details buffered out - also glowed.

He couldn’t remember picking up any kind of ‘enchanted’ mora, just one random one he found on the roads right outside of Liyue.

It didn’t seem off in anyway-

His thoughts were cut off as Hydro swirled faster and stronger around him, knocking him off his knees and onto his ass, his grip on the arrow and bow tightening.

All the animals ran - of course including the small finch he was aiming for - from the sounds and lights, and something deep and primal inside of him wanted to run as well.

Something screamed that he wasn’t supposed to see this, to feel this.

Something was wrong.

Soon enough he couldn’t keep his grip on the arrow.

He let go.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍪🍫🍩୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

Everything was a blur to you.

All you knew was that you had to let go of this build up of power.

You had to.

Something bad would happen if you didn’t and god damn it you weren’t about to find out.

You truly, desperately, just wanted to go home.

The songs of narwhals and whales comforted you.

‘You will be okay’ they sang.

You would be okay.

Just let go.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍡🍪🍬୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

People in the city watched in shock as a forest not too far from the harbor became a light show of Hydro and golden light.

Small animals and creatures ran towards the city, this including monsters, but nothing stopped to attack. In fact, it seemed like everything was too scared to even consider attacking.

Ningguang and her guards quickly ran outside to asses the situation, meeting up with fellow Vision Holders on the edge of the city.

However, Xingqiu and Yelan seemed… out of it. And on top of that, Childe - though he wasn’t her favorite he was strong and could be of help - was no where to be found.

“Does anyone have a grasp on the situation?” Nigguang asked, only to receive shaken heads and no’s.

“I tried to get close,” started Xiao, “But something knocked me back. I was able to hear the Harbinger’s screams from inside, and from what I could gather, he doesn’t seem to be the… direct cause.” Despite what he said, Xiao seemed a bit upset at the fact that Childe wasn’t the true cause, likely just wanting an excuse to beat him up a little.

The Geo ridden Lady huffed befit finally turning her attention to the two Hydro users who seemed entranced by the lights.

“What are you-“

“They call to us.” Xingqiu cut her off.

“They sing for us.” Yelan finished.

Nigguang looked back to everyone else who simply shrugged, before noticing Zhongli also looked out of it, though before she could get a word out, he also spoke.

“It’s so calming… I have not felt true peace like this in…”

He didn’t even finish his sentence. His eyes, unlike the two Hydro users, were entranced by the golden lights that highlighted the light show.

Nigguang’s face was filled with confusion. Though she shook it off.

And again, before she could give out any orders, she was interrupted.

Though not by anyone, but by the lights themselves.

A flash of blue light blinded the group.

Then, the song of a group of narwhals and whales filled the sky.

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍩🍮🍧୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

Blue and gold light enveloped near all of Liyue, the show being noticeable by all surrounding nations, Mondstadt especially.

And the air filled with the song of Narwhal and Whale alike.

A miracle of All-Devouring Narwhals and All-Encompassing Whales swam into the sky, dancing through the clouds.

They flew gently over Liyue, the nation having been stunned into shock and stillness over the whole situation.

Nigguang watched with bated breath as they sailed by the Jade Palace, only exhaling when they passed with not problem.

Keqing watched from beside Nigguang, mesmerized at the trail of celestial power flowing behind them.

Xiao rushed up buildings in order to get closer, but was knocked back by the sheer force of their power, though he was caught by a worried Ganyu. Both landed by an armed-and-ready Shenhe, who was more than ready to attack if need be.

Xingqiu and Yelan simply stared up at the miracle, their Visions resonating with Hydro energy they released. They felt empowered, and could feel the pure raw and unfiltered strength rolling off them in waves. They wanted to be close to that power. Wanted to feel that power.

Something deep inside them wanted that power.

Everyone in the city watched as the miracle flew just above their homes and businesses, making their presence all the more apparent as they bathed the golden city in royal blue.

This continued until a small bird was dumb enough to try and take flight to get away.

This bird being the one Childe had targeted- not that anyone knew.

The Whales and Narwhals corralled the bird, forcing it to fly higher and higher into the clouds, and it wasn’t long before all ginormous creatures followed behind it.

Then an even brighter flash of blue echoed across the skyline, small star-like glitters falling to Teyvat then fading from existence before they could touch its surface. A small amount of feathers followed after.

Nigguang could feel her jaw drop.

All that… to kill a bird?????

… She was going to need a week off just to comprehend what had just happened.

Keqing pat the woman on the back, sighing in tiredness as well.

She had a sneaking suspicion that Childe may have had something to do with this… event. Gods the paperwork she was about to be loaded with…

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍬🍯🍩୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

Childe had figured out what primal instinct had led him to hide in the cave he was currently tucked in.

Foul Legacy.

He had yet to really tell anyone, but due to his time in the Abyss and its creation, it was safe to say it pretty much had a mind of its own. Which wasn’t bad as it would help him to doge attacks or alert him of presences he may not have noticed himself, but the shrieking and crying he heard from it deep in his soul was enough to tell him that this whole situation was wrong.

Nothing about what just happened should have been… well it shouldn’t have happened to say anything.

He could still hear it, resonating deep inside his soul, Electro cracking out whenever he heard a noise he couldn’t identify.

It was protecting him.

As he would for it.

He didn’t dare draw another arrow from the bow in his grasp, not until he learned what the fuck just happened. Including the fact that for some odd reason, he desperately wanted to just… stare(?) at the Narwhals and Whales until they disappeared, luckily Foul Legacy snapped him right out of that and told him to find shelter.

He did have his Hydro blades out, however, patiently waiting till he - and Foul Legacy - felt safe enough to exit.

A sudden loud caw of a bird made him flinch - not his proudest moment - and kick the bow to the side. What he wasn’t expecting was the loud string of curses that came from… the… bow..?

So now it was pinned to the wall by one blade and a foot, the other blade pointed directly at… it? There were no weak points on a bow..?

…Were there..?

૮꒰づ˶• ༝ •˶꒱づ ˚ʚ ꒰⁐⁐⁐⁐୨🍮🍨🍪୧⁐⁐⁐⁐꒱ ɞ˚

This is not what you wanted.

First, you get isekaied against your will; you didn’t even remember how you supposedly DIED… if you DID die anyway…

Two, you were reincarnated as MONEY. FUCKING MONEY. How does that… who comes up with that??? A fucking high schooler who has nothing better to do than write shitty fanfiction????

And finally, three… HE KICKED YOU!!! WHO GAVE HIM THE RIGHT TO THREATEN YOU?!?

You didn’t understand your powers, what the FUCK just happened, why Hydro just… became?? you??? And why on gods green earth you had to be MORA. You’re never gonna get over that you became MORA???? Like??? Really??????? Money????? You mean, you love the stuff but COME ON-

Jesus fuckin’-

Huffing at the man before you, you finally decided speak to this bitch before you because how dare he.

“Listen here-“

You were cut off by the blade moving closer to your body(??????) and Childe growling - yes. Growling - at you.

“No you listen. I don’t know what you are but what in the name of the Tsaritsa was that?”

If only this man could see your eye twitch.

“No how about YOU listen? I don’t know what the fuck that was, but I plan on figuring it out now could you PLEASE MOVE YOUR DAMN BLADES FROM MY FACE?!?!? God…”

The Hydro blades slowly removed themselves from your face, as did the boot. But you were then picked up by the man, held shockingly gently in his grip.

“What… are you?” He asked hesitantly.

“I… I honestly don’t know how to answer that question. But I’m pretty sure I’m that little Mora piece on the front.” You answered. You forced yourself to calm down. This wasn’t his fault, just so happened to be the guy who picked you up… this was going to be a mantra for a while…

“Oh… so your this little thing right here?” You felt his fingers wrap around you - and you mean your real body - and pull. Fear immediately filled your being.

“Wait! WAIT!-“ He tugged you right out, rendering you silent.

When he pulled you out, your body glowed and you reverted back to looking like a regular piece of mora. Engravings and all.

You, meanwhile, were screaming your head off, as you now knew that if removed from a weapon, you’d just be a regular ass piece of money again. Immediately you mind started racing, wondering as to way, and the only thing you could come up with was the Elemental Energy, but lore wasn’t really your strong suit… you just liked the pretty women and men…

You felt yourself gently being pressed into the slot carved for you in his bow, and started talking again.

“NEVER! Do that again, please. Unless absolutely necessary, don’t do that. You know how terrifying it is to be able to see and speak then move a couple inches and no longer be able to see or have others hear you? Fucking horrifying I’ll tell you that…” you watched the man shiver before sighing.

“Noted. Um… anything else I should be made aware of before I ask anymore questions?”

You jumped on the opportunity.

“Whenever I am apart of your weapons. Don’t. De. Summon. Them. Hurts like hell. Ever felt your molecules beings torn apart bit by bit? Not fun, don’t recommend it.” Again, Childe shivered.

“Now… you really don’t know what that was out there?” He asked again, and you sighed.

“I wish I did. I’ll admit, I was thinking of that one move you use as Foul Legacy where you summon a Whale… and a bit of your master…”

You watched as Childe’s eyes lit up.

“You know of Foul Legacy? And of my Master?” Then his eyes darkened.

“How do you know of them..?” You shivered… as well as money can shiver anyway.

“Uhm… magic?” You asked, a noticeable tilt in your voice.

His glare then lightened up.

“Oh! Like… when you attach to a weapon, you suddenly gain a bunch of knowledge on that person?” Holy shit he just gave you a way out!

“Uh… yeah! Yeah that’s exactly what it is! You figured it out! Sorry I was uh… hesitant. Just didn’t want to reveal all my secrets, you know?” Holy shit. Holy fuck. Please work please work-

“That’s really amazing! A magical piece of mora… with the ability to make your attacks beyond that of a God’s… heheheh…”

Oop. Shit. That was not good.

“Listen. I’m not going to do anything for you without my consent, you got that? I’m not even here of my own free will mind you. Just gained sentience in your bag and all of a sudden I’m a bow. This is going to be a symbiotic relationship or I’m finding someone else, alright?” You spoke up, not even hiding the fact that you were… well a little more than concerned with what he just said.

“… What are you going to do if I don’t respect your wishes?” Shit fuck shit fuck-

“… I will scream next time you use me.”

And into a standstill you both sat.

He stared at you and he could feel you glaring into him. It was probably weird feeling a bow glare into him. New feeling he never thought he’d feel before.

“… Alright. Taking someone’s free will isn’t really something I do anyway. So don’t be fearful… comrade?” Was he asking your name..?.. Eh. Comrade is nice and you don’t feel like giving it out so meh.

“Comrade works. And uhm… yeah.” Welp that was awkward. Good job 👍🏾!

The two of you continued to stare at each other in silence for a few moments.

“So… what’s your favorite dish?”

“I can’t eat asshole-“

“Childe!”

The mentioned man whipped his head in the direction of the call, honestly scaring you with how fast it moved - you are a hundred percent sure you heard a crack.

By the covered entrance of the cave stood Nigguang, Keqing, Zhongli and both Hydro Vision users. Nigguang was the one to call him.

“What are enough doing out here? Do you have any idea was caused… whatever that was?? And - as much as I hate to ask - are you alright?” She was firing questions out at an extreme speed, making both you and Childe dizzy.

“Uhm… I was hunting, I… haven’t the foggiest idea what you’re talking about! And yes , I am okay. Thank you for asking?” You knew he sucked ass a lying but like… how did that sound convincing in anyway?? The hesitation just made it worse!-

“You haven’t the foggiest clue, you say…” Keqing asked while glaring at the ginger. Ed She Ran lookin’ headass-

“Yep! No idea, not the slightest idea, definitely wasn’t my bow or the enchanted mora on it! Nope not at all.”

The group looked at him, and he looked at them.

They looked at him, and he looked at them.

They looked at him, and he looked at them.

And this went on for several minutes before this super smart man said:

“Yep, not me at all.”

And before anyone coup ask questions you groaned, forcing all attention into yourself before tearing him a new one.

“You dumb motherfucker! “I haven’t the foggiest idea😢” my ass!”

“How did you say that?-“

“Shut your bitchass up before I sew it shut. I should beat your ass for that. How they fuck you gonna say some shit like that and expect them to just go “Oh okay!😚” like some dumbass?”

“No really how-“

“I will slap the stupid outta you don’t fucking test me ginger bitch. Fatherless. That’s why your father sold you ass off it’s cause you so DAMN stupid, Jesus.”

“Mora?”

“What do you fucking want you cunt.”

“… We’re still in front of people.”

“… I will not hesitate to shoot all of you-“

… Nigguang was going to have so much paperwork tonight.

໒꒰ྀི˶˙Ⱉ˙˶꒱ྀིა Author’s note : MORA!READER MORA!READER MORA!READER MORA!READER MORA!READER LETS GIVE IT UP FOR MORA!READER!!!!! ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᗜ ᵔ˶꒱ა˖⁺‧₊˚

They’re here you guys!!!! Get happy get wild!!!! Holy shit that ending was mild!!! I hate it!!! Anyway-

This is gonna SAGAU because… meh. But that doesn’t matter! Their here! But I’m not done yet, next thing on my checklist is humanizing the animals (Main ones) so I’ll be be radio silent for a bit again lmao (unless I choose to post shit which is very likely-) ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა

Hope you enjoyed the first chapter of Mora!Reader! More is, of course, on the way! ૮꒰ྀི∩´ ᵕ `∩꒱ྀིა

Have a magnificent day/night my dears!~

/)/)

( . .)

c( づ♡ Loves you guys!! <3

[bucks-babe]

maybe angel!reader helping bucky thru a panic attack? like he thinks when he dies hes gonna suffer in hell for the stuff the winter soldier did and we calm him down and help him? u can add smut if u want but u dont have to !!

My Guardian, My Angel, My Love

Pairing: Bucky x angel!reader

Summary: For the first time Bucky gets to experience peace because of his sweet angel.

Word Count: 5.5k

Warnings: Angst?, actually a lot of angst, I don’t know how it got that way but it did, it gets happy though, fluff, smut (I can’t help myself), oral f!receiving, handjob, awkward sex talk, like really awkward, talk about heaven and dying, talk about life after death and immortality, angels based off of Supernatural but I changed a few things, blood, nearly dying, gunshots, reader doesn’t have a soul but can still love because I said so, reader knows when and how everyone dies but can’t tell them, reader has wings, 3rd person, age gap (reader is eons old), wings being a metaphor for sexual assault?, think Maleficent, no use of Y/N, so many emotions

A/N: This is not supposed to force any religion nor be an accurate representation of any religion. I din't go with panic attack, rather I had him almost die. I was feeling angsty

The moment Bucky’s knees hit the ground he knows it's over, that this is the end. He knew this was the way he would go out, on a mission, desperately trying to atone all his misdeeds. Tendrils of pain shot throughout his stomach, blood seeping through his fingers. When his side hit the ground, he knew it wouldn’t be too long before he went, limbs feeling too heavy. He couldn’t hear Steve screaming for help, scrambling for anything to stop the bleeding.

What Bucky did hear though, was a ruffle, almost like a flock of birds flying by, then a figure he’d never seen before stood above him. She’s here to take me. It didn’t strike Bucky as odd that she was the only thing that was clear, the rest of his view blurry and unfocused. He tried to speak, he really did, but no words came out, the breath leaving his lungs not enough to push any words out.

The woman crouches down, hand cupping his cheek with such softness tears leave his eyes, wiped away by Steve in the quinjet who seemingly can’t see her. “Close your eyes, my love. When you wake up, I’ll be there.” Fuck, this is really happening. Fear coursed through his body, scared of what punishment his sins earned him. I deserve to go to hell for what I’ve done. 

A guttural whine passes his lips; Steve chokes back sobs next to his lifelong friend. “Shh, none of that, now. I won’t let anything bad happen to you, I promise. You can rest now.” All at once, the pain is gone. Bucky feels like he’s floating - it’s wonderful.

Bucky has no problem opening his eyes. What the fuck? This is hell? Well damn. The most wonderful sound meets his ears - a giggle, soft and delicate. “No, my love, this is not hell and you’re not dead.” She comes into view. She’s gorgeous. Wait, I’m alive! Apparently, Bucky says that last part because Steve’s gasp enters his ears.

“Yeah, Buck, you’re alive. Gave us a scare though, didn’t uh, didn’t know if you would make it.” Bucky doesn’t respond right away, too busy looking around for his mystery woman, only to be met with the walls of the med bay. “Hey, I’m right here, Buck, look at me.” It’s not the woman, rather it’s Steve.

“How long was I out? What happened?”

“A few days. It was touch and go for some time but you bounced back. When we were on the mission, Hydra had a sniper posted outside. He got you right in the stomach.” Bucky could hear the emotion in Steve’s voice, the fear of losing his best friend still leaving him shaken up.

“Well, they’re a pretty shitty shot if you ask me. Could have gotten one right between the eyes with one of those shit guns we got in the war.” Steve coughs out a laugh, turning into a belly laugh a few seconds later. Bucky would laugh with him, but the bullet wound in his abdomen says he shouldn’t. He still doesn’t see the woman, though. Maybe I just made her up. 

A few days later, doctor Cho gives him the all clear to leave the med bay; however, he’s off duty for the foreseeable future and not any amount of his grumbling changed her mind. Still, Bucky hasn’t seen the woman. He feels a little crazy that he misses her, well crazier. 

Slowly, he makes his way to his room. Steve offered to help but Bucky wanted to do this on his own, having been tended to his whole stay in hospital. He puts in his password on the keypad Tony installed when Bucky first arrived, when the fear that Hydra would come back and take him was too much to bear. His room is the same way he left it, except for a woman on his bed. Not just any woman though, it was his mystery lady. 

Someone’s gonna have to put me in the cuckoo's nest. She laughs as if she can hear his thoughts. God, I hope not. “God has bigger things to worry about than such an inconspicuous fear as that, my love.” She sits up, facing him, the most beautiful smile gracing her lips.

“Can you hear my thoughts?” He feels like he already knows the answer, but asks anyway. If this woman is made up, of course she can read his mind. She just smiles and rises to her feet, walking over to him.

“What do you think, my love?” She tilts her head, a soft smile still resides on her lips. He feels so safe with her and she isn’t even real, just a figment of his imagination, a ruse to comfort himself in what he thought were his last moments. “I am very real, I’ll have you know.”

Bucky doesn’t know why, but he believes her. He believes this woman who showed up randomly on a field, who his best friend couldn’t see, and who disappeared without a trace. “How then? How did you do it?”

“Do what, my love?” She grabs his hand and leads him to the bed, helping him sit, finding a spot next to him.

“Save me, hear my thoughts, hide from Steve, disappear, get into my room, all of it. It’s not natural. Either you’re a ghost, or a mutant, or a reaper who was trying to take me. I don’t know, but you’re something.” Another laugh escapes her. He should be terrified of her, but he can’t find it in himself to be, her presence emanating calm.

“Well aren’t you a clever one? However, I’m none of those things nor did I save you. It just wasn’t your time yet. I’m an angel, though, to answer your question.” Bucky just stares, not believing her. This has to be a joke. “No joke, my love. If you want, I can prove it to you.” Bucky doesn’t even question why she calls him my love, the sound of it just too nice to stop.

Bucky just nods, words failing him. She rises to her feet, turning to stand in front of him. He hears them before he sees them, the same ruffle he heard as he lay dying. Then he sees them. A pair of dark wings coming from her back. She doesn’t spread them all the way, too big to fit in the small space of his room. “They’re black.” She throws her head back, a loud, beautiful laugh fills his ears. 

“That was your first thought? You don’t like them? Personally I think they’re quite nice.” It was the first thing that came to his mind, the rest blank. Maybe he should have asked for more proof, but he knows she would never lie to him. He doesn’t know how he knows, he just does. 

“I don’t know. I guess I just thought they’d be white. With the whole angel thing, you know?” She hums.

“There is a lot humans have wrong about us. I mean, plenty of us have white wings, but they come in many colors. If you can believe it, this isn’t even my true form.” Bucky is confused, she looks so real. A tangible human, someone he can touch.

“What is your true form then? Can I see it?” That’s a little personal to ask, dumbass.

“Well, that is a little complicated. Only one human has seen my true form and it didn’t go well. I thought she could handle it, but when she saw me, well let’s just say she couldn’t see from then on.” Bucky’s eyes widened, not expecting that answer. “Anything else you want to ask me?”

Her wings are still out, folded against her back. They look so soft. “Can I touch your wings?” Her wings shift slightly. If he wasn’t trained to observe everything and everyone, Bucky wouldn’t have known that she was uncomfortable. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. I didn’t know-”

“That’s okay. An angel’s wings are very personal. They’re sensitive and even for an ethereal being, it's very personal - intimate.”Clearing her throat, she changes the subject. “I know your name, my love. Might I say, it’s very pretty, but you don’t know mine.” Bucky picks up on her attempt to move his attention away from her wings.

“What is it then? I can’t call you angel forever, however fitting it may be.”

“Well I don’t exactly have a name. I’m a cherubim. The only angels who have names are the archangels, the first borns.”

It was Bucky’s turn to smile.”My little cherub.” She doesn’t tell him that cherub is the plural of cherubim. Until this day, Bucky didn’t know that angels could get shy, yet here his sweet cherub is, shying away from his piercing eyes. He bets if he felt her face he would feel the heat on them. “I have to ask though, my little cherub, why did you come to me?”

She became serious, staring right into his eyes. “Because God commanded it.”

“What does God want to do with me? Out of all the people in this world, he chose me?” A pained look crossed her face and she walked over to him, kneeling in front of him like he was her God. Her hands ran up his arms, goosebumps rising at the pass of her hands. He almost stopped breathing - he could feel her hand on his left arm. He hasn’t felt anything with that hand since he fell of that train.

Hands still rising, she cups his face with both hands, making him look into her eyes. “You don’t think you deserve to be saved.” It wasn’t a question. She knew. “That is why he sent me. He sent me because you deserve it. You deserve to let go.” At that moment, Bucky broke down. Sobbing uncontrollably, somehow without pain in his fresh wound.

She pulls him into her, wrapping her arms around him. His face buried in her neck, arms clutching her back. She hesitates for a second, no one having touched her wings in thousands of years, yet she cocoons him with them, shielding him from the world. It only makes Bucky cry harder, her wings holding every bit of softness he thought they would. The comfort she brings unlike any other he experienced before.

Her arms rub his back as she coos to him. Soft words spoken into his hair. “Shh, my love, I’m here. Nothing bad will ever happen to you again. I will die before I let that happen.” The conviction in her tone sets him off more, unable to comprehend someone would do that for him without a second thought. A being, older than he can even fathom, is ready to give it all away for a mesley human. A speck of dust in her life. His entire existence no longer than a second when compared to hers.

That’s how it was for a while, Bucky’s sweet cherub staying with him. At night she would wrap her wings around him, keeping him safe. Bucky knows that her powers are the reason his nightmares are gone. At first he was glad that he could finally sleep, but then the guilt crept in. Why should he be allowed to forget the horrors he committed? Their families didn’t get that condolence. 

When he told her this she wasn’t having any of it, wings jerking in annoyance. It was something that he picked up on, how when she experienced emotions her wings would move in different ways, always giving her away. 

“I swear, my love, you’re going to make my wings turn gray with all this. I have lived a long life, longer than you can comprehend, so when I tell you that I have seen the best and the worst of this world, I mean it. And you, my love, are a good man. There is a reason God sent me to you.” Her wings surrounded him and he felt himself relax. “There is no quest to send you on, no mission that the world hangs in the balance of. It’s just you. A man who needs to see the good in himself.” Bucky hangs his head in shame, not meeting her eyes.

“You think your purpose is suffering for the things you couldn’t control? My purpose is to save you. My love,” she cups his face in her hands, wiping away the tears he didn’t know had formed, “I have done far worse things in my life. Horrific things, yet I’m here right now, with you. Please, let me take your pain away.”

None of this was easy for Bucky. No one has ever had their sole purpose be him. Back in the forties he took care of Steve, he stepped up when his father left. When he was no longer the Winter Soldier, Steve helped him, but Steve’s care never felt like this. Bucky knows that he’s fallen in love with her. He knows that she knows, but what he doesn’t know is if she feels the same.

What he doesn’t know is that she is fighting the same battle, the feeling of love is one she has never had before. It all came to a head one night, Bucky wrapped in her wings, her head on his chest. “Cherub?” She felt the vibrations in his chest.

“Yes, my love.”

“You said that we could be together for the rest of my life, right?” She did say that when he was worried that she would leave him after her mission was complete.

“I did.” One thing about her is that she never gave long answers to questions, not used to having to talk with humans.

“What happens when I die? Where will I go? I want you to be there with me.”

She sighed, thinking about how to convey her words properly. “When you die… you’ll go to heaven. It has already been decided. If you choose, when you go, I will be there with you for the rest of our existence, but you don’t have to make a decision now. My body will age with yours, follow you to the end of your life. When your time comes, we will leave and go to heaven where we will both be young again.”

Without hesitation Bucky answers, “I want that. I want you to be with me for the rest of eternity.” There was no doubt in his mind. Even though he met her a few months ago, he knew. “I have to ask, what is heaven like?”

She sits up a bit, shifting to lay on his chest, wings still cocooning them, keeping them in their own little bubble. “There is no one heaven. Not everyone who ever went there is in the same place. Heaven is made up of small pockets of personal heavens. People who lost their loved ones meet again, your happiest memories are relived, there is no pain or sorrow, you can have anything you want.”

Bucky felt the pull of his chest, emotion bubbling up. “Is my ma there? And Becca?” The words come out thick, a lump forms in Bucky’s throat. “Please, don’t lie to me.”

She looks into his eyes. “Yes, they are. They’re together and they’re waiting for you. I have seen them myself, right before I left to meet you. They talk very highly of you, my love.”

Tears fall from his face, the pain in his chest all the time at the greatest loss of his life eased slightly. “Can I talk to them?” He knows it's a long shot, but if there is a chance he wants it.

“I’m so sorry, my love, but I can’t. Even I don’t have the power to do that. If I could, I would.” A pained whine leaves his lips. “Hey, you know who is waiting for you too?” She waits a beat before speaking anyway. “Your dog from when you were a kid. He’s in his prime, always will be. His days are spent chasing rabbits around the yard.”

“Balto’s up there too?” A small smile graced his face, crows feet appearing by his eyes.

“Yeah. If it is any consolation, time passes differently up there. The longing you feel right now for them, they feel the same only it’s made easier by us.” Bucky only nods, staring into her eyes, seeing nothing but truth. His eyes flicker to her lips and back up. “You can, my love, I want you to.”

That was all Bucky needed to hear. Gently cupping her cheek, he guided her lips to his. There was no rush, no sense of urgency. They had all the time in the world and then some. Bucky never felt anything this good in his life and he was only kissing her. When she licked his lips, he opened mouth without a thought, brain clouded with love just for her. 

He moaned into the kiss, the feeling of her tongue on his incredible. At his sound, Bucky felt her wings flutter under him. Breaking the kiss, he giggled. Bucky actually giggled. She reared her head back, slightly affronted by his laugh when she just kissed him.

“I’m sorry, my little cherub, it’s just that your wings tickled me.” She huffs and a second later, her wings are gone the only sign they were ever out is the small black feather on the bed. “No, cherub, don’t put them away. I love them.” She wasn’t really offended, but she wanted to tease him a bit.

Her wings were always out around Bucky, comfortable enough to reveal the most intimate and personal part of herself to him. He was the first human in thousands of years to touch them, but he was the only one to be wrapped in them. The only time they were touched was when a man cut them off her back. It was a time when she trusted humans, not knowing the atrocities they were capable of. 

Her wings were white then, when she was pure and unknowing of the hate humans possessed. God crafted her a new pair. Of course she accepted them, but her feathers turned black, scared she looked to her father. When he said that it was because of the wrongs his creations did, it broke something in her, took away her purity, teaching her a lesson. Father never blamed her for it, he knew she would heal with time. It was part of the reason he sent her to the man she lays in bed with.

Bucky didn’t know this, he didn’t know how much she was betrayed by humans, only for her to trust him and him alone. She playfully glares at him before bringing her wings back out, sitting up on his lap. Gently, more gentle than he has been in years, Bucky reaches out to touch them. She lets him feel them whenever he wants, even wrapping him in them as he sleeps, but this was a completely different setting.

She was so vulnerable at this moment. Her wings flapped, a nervous tick of her’s, making Bucky pull away immediately. “Cherub, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable.” She swallows before meeting his eyes.

“It’s not that I don’t want you to touch them. It’s just that only one other human has touched them. There was a time where I was naive and innocent, not knowing what humans were capable of.” She pauses and Bucky sits up, back against the headboard and laces his fingers with hers, feeling the softness on his metal hand.

“It was a man, he had a family, a kid and a wife. They struggled to survive, trading their valuables for a slice of bread. Father sent me to help them, take away their sorrows. Said he was an honest man trying to make an honest living.” Bucky senses where her story is going, hoping that it doesn’t end the way he fears, but the pain in her eyes is palpable, a human emotion angels almost never experience.

He waits for her to continue, not forcing her to speak. “At first, they were grateful, having everything they needed. They had their health, food on the table, but the man grew greedy. He wanted more. One day, as I was watching his child in a field, keeping her safe from the horrors of the world, he snuck behind me with a sword he got from a blacksmith, sharper than any blade. He-he cut my wings right off my back.”

Tears fell from her eyes, not having relived that moment for thousands of years. Bucky felt his heart physically ache. She was sent to heal him, but it was his turn to do the same. “You know, my wings used to be white?” She looks into his eyes, red with tears. “When he hurt me, Father took me back to heaven, crafting me another pair. They were white but when he gave them to me, they turned black.”

A whine leaves her lips and Bucky pulls her into him, careful not to touch her wings. “Oh, my sweet little cherub, I’m here and I won’t let anyone hurt you again. I’ve never felt as content as I have with you, never so happy and I will do anything to keep you safe. I love you, no matter what you have done, I’ll still love you.” This only made her cry harder. Human emotions were foreign to her, but spending so much time with Bucky caused her to develop them. It was almost overwhelming, going from not having anything to having so much fill her body.

“Father said that it was because the man took my innocence, showed me the evil of the world. I’ve never seen him apologize for anything, yet that day he was broken, realizing that his creations, even the ones he thought were good, are capable of unspeakable atrocities. They will never turn white again because I’m ruined.” Tears welled up in Bucky’s eyes. His sweet cherub thinking she is anything less than perfect breaks his heart.

“My cherub, you saved me, now let me do the same for you. Let me heal you like you have me.” Leaning back slightly, she took his hands in her own, drawing them up her waist to her back, moving them to touch her wings. At his touch, she gasped, eyes closing forcing more tears to cascade down her face. The feeling of his gentle hands, hands that have done so much harm, resting on the most violated part of her body was something she never thought would happen.

She didn’t know she could love until she met Bucky, finally placing a word to the indescribable warmth that spreads throughout her body every time she thinks of him. “I love you too, my love. Forever and ever, til you die, til the end of time, in heaven and on earth.” They were both crying, neither experiencing the tenderness of love before.

He brings her down, kissing her with as much passion as he possibly could, tasting the mixture of both of their tears. Her arms clutching onto him, trying to get closer. He did the same, one hand running across her wings like he was trying to wash away the taint of betrayal his kind caused. 

Shifting on his lap, she feels the bulge of his cock, half hard pressed up against her. Gasping, she pulls away. “Cherub, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean, it just-.” She silences him with her lips, drawing a groan from him, subconsciously grinding down onto him. “Cherub, we have to stop, I don’t want to take advantage of you. You’re vulnerable right now, I can’t do that to you.”

Her hips stutter on his. “My love, I want to, I need to. Need to be closer to you, please grant me this.” His hands run up and down her sides, soothing the heat of her skin.

“Any time you want to stop, or don’t like something, you tell me. Okay? This is about me showing you how perfect you are.” She nods, kissing him one more time. Bucky’s hands slide up her shirt, resting on her soft skin, palms feeling the goosebump under his touch. Looking up at her for permission to take her shirt off, she nods.

Bucky did that with every piece of clothing, every move he made. Soon they were both naked, her wings splayed out on the bed, twitching in a way he never saw before - arousal. “My, my love, I have to tell you something.” He pulls his eyes away from her wings to look into her eyes. “I’ve never done this before. Angels, we don’t do this, I don’t know what to feel right now.” 

Hands cupping her cheeks, he smiles at her, relaxing into his touch. “Do you feel safe?” She nods. “Do you feel like you have to do this for me?” She shakes her head. “Do you want me to please you?” She nods once again. “We don’t have to do anything with this,” he gestures to his throbbing erection. 

“I want to, I just need you to show me what to do.” The thought that she trusts him enough to take care of her makes his cock pulse, aching for some type of relief.

“Let me make you feel good, okay? All you have to do is lay back and tell me how it feels.” She nods her head in understanding, worries slowly fading away. He kisses down her body, taking the time to swirl his tongue around his sensitive nipples, grinning at the small gasp it draws from his cherubs lips.

Going further down, his face is right in front of her pussy, smelling her intoxicating scent. “Keep your eyes on me, cherub.” She gulps. For a minute, Bucky just stares at her pussy, breathing her in, memorizing how wet she is before his tongue flicks out onto her clit. 

“Oh, that feels good. Can you do it again?” She was so sweet, asking so kindly for him to deliver her pleasure.

“Of course I can.” And with that, Bucky dives into her pussy, restraining himself from devouring her. He groans into her cunt, already addicted to her taste, the moans she lets out are soft and breathy, yet it’s one of the most beautiful things he's ever heard, only competition being her laugh.

“My love, I don’t, what is happening to me?” Bucky pulls away from her cunt, reaching up to lace their hands together. 

“Just let that feeling wash over you. It’s okay, I’ll catch you when you fall, I’m here.” He goes right back to her pussy, lapping her juices up, eyes boring into hers. She was twitching on the bed, hips bucking up to meet his tongue. Bucky chuckles when he sees her wings flap, not knowing what to do with the pleasure coursing through her.

Her orgasm comes as a surprise to her, never experiencing one before, nor knowing what they were. Her eyes shoot open, wings beating wildly, body almost convulsing on the soft sheets. Bucky pulls away, not trying to overstimulate her. He almost cums at the sight of her, it was the most beautiful thing he has ever seen.

It takes her a while, but she comes down, wings falling limp on the bed as Bucky crawls up her body, resting in between her legs. “My love, what was that? I thought I was about to die.” 

Barking out a laugh, Bucky leans down. “That was an orgasm, sweet cherub. How did it feel?” She whines, not able to put what she felt into words.

“Like nothing I have ever felt before. It was incredible.” Her eyes close. Bucky is perfectly happy to hold her, not caring about his own orgasm, but her eyes shoot open, wide and curious. “Can you have one, too?”

Another laugh leaves him. “Yes, cherub, I can. It’s a little different from yours though.” Her eyes squint in confusion, clearly not understanding what could be different. “Well, for one, what I have looks a little different to yours, doesn’t it?” She nods. Bucky never thought he would be giving “The Talk” to an angel, but here he was. “When I have an orgasm, stuff comes out of this tip, right here.” He grabs his cock to show her. 

“Can I see it? How do I make you do that?” It was Bucky’s turn to be surprised. 

“Cherub, you don’t have to do that.” Her glare is enough to make Bucky continue. “Um, there are a few different ways. I could put it inside of you, that feels good for you too.”

“In where?” Bucky huffs, not in annoyance, but this talk is turning him off. Not that he’s mad at that, but the conversation feels like talking to a child, someone who hasn’t experienced anything sexual and it wasn’t exactly turning him on, it felt wrong to have this talk naked.

“In this hole right under where I was touching you. There is another one under that, but it’s different from the other. Or your mouth, but also a hand. Pretty much anything that could rub against that area.” Bucky felt his cheeks heat up. His cock was going soft right in front of her eyes.

“Can I do one? I want to see you orgasm.” Her eyes were so bright and eager, he couldn’t say no to his cherub. He nods, only for her to glance down at his soft cock. “Why is it smaller now? I think it’s kind of cute.”

This has to be the most embarrassing thing that has ever happened to him. No woman has ever called his dick cute, or made a comment on its size when soft. He gets compliments on how big he is when he’s hard, but soft is a different story. He’s a grower not a shower. He has to admit, his encounter is damaging his ego a bit. “It gets bigger when I’m aroused, but if it’s not touched it gets softer.” He’s lying straight through his teeth, he can stay hard for hours without touching his dick.

“If you touch it, it gets big again.” She switches positions, having him on his back, resting between his legs, face right next to his cock. He feels himself twitch and she jerks her head in surprise, giggling at her own reaction. She begins to almost pet him, it feels good but not what he needs.

He reaches down, guiding her hand to gather the precum at his tip, slowly pulling it back down, tightening her grip on his dick. “Oh, wow, it’s getting bigger. It’s so hard.” Her amazement at something so simple as a dick getting hard is endearing. 

Bucky grunts when he twists her hand. “I liked that sound.” Her words make him groan again, cock all the way hard. His hips buck into her hand and he lets her hand go, trusting her to keep her pace. It’s slow but firm, driving him insane. He wants her to go faster, harder, but this is about her, letting her discover at her own pace.

“Spit on the tip, it’ll make it easier to move.” She does so without hesitation. Bucky’s head flies back into the headboard, moaning at her soft hands working his cock. “Just like that, cherub, you’re doing so good. This feels incredible.” Bucky meant every word of it. Her hand honestly felt better than the full blown sex he’s had in the past. Maybe it was because he loved her with all his heart, or maybe it was because she was an angel, either way, Bucky didn’t have it in himself to care.

“You look so pretty like this, my love. I love this, making you feel good.” Bucky’s hips pick up speed, feeling his orgasm building up in the base of his cock. 

“Cherub, I’m going to cum. Please keep going just like that.” She figures he means orgasm since he is jerking just like she was. The urge to make him orgasm was almost too much to bear, wanting him to show her how beautiful he was when he lets go. “Oh, cherub, I’m about to, oh fuck.” He moans long and loud, cum spurting out of his tip. She gasps at the force of it but doesn’t let up her pace. She had never seen anything more beautiful than her love in this moment.

He has to stop her, not knowing that he needed a break. “Love, I want to make you do that again.” She scoops some of his cum off his stomach with her finger and just stares at it.

“You can taste it if you’d like.” She eagerly licks her fingers, eyes bulging at his taste, dropping down to lick the rest of it off his body. “Come here, cherub.” He pulls her into a kiss, tasting himself on her tongue. He pulls the cover over their bodies, her wings instinctively wrapping around him.

“Thank you, my love, for always taking care of me. I was sent to save you, yet I feel that it’s the other way around.” Bucky doesn’t think so. He knows that she saved him. They fall asleep together and in the morning they will find that her wings are just a bit lighter than the night before.

[envy-of-the-apple]

hii!

i saw your list for things you enjoy writing for and omfgg languge barriers<33 those are absolutely top tier i love reading about those!! could i request a language barrier + monster au w beel? tysm and have a great day!!

ohhhhhhh thats so interesting????im gonna write an orc fit cuz i feel like that fits him so well-

(Dark content, kidnapping, noncon touching, shitty japanese cuz google translate, etcetc)

(Yandere! Orc! Beezebub x reader)

(translated sentences in the tags)

You saw the fires before you even heard the warning bells.

You'd heard the stories. Back when you were a child, crowded inside the elders cottage as you and the other children eagerly listened to the stories about the orcs. Only one of the adults had seen the warriors. Back when she was a child. Monstrous beasts, filled with nothing but anger and the taste of war.

"Will they ever come here?" One child had asked. A hushed murmur fell amongst the youth.

The elder smiled.

"No young one," she said, "they all reside in the north. No beast would travel so far."

She spoke lies, the proof only revealing itself years later.

You can hear the screams through your thin walls. Still, you continue to huddle in the corner of your home like a coward. It's too late to run. Far too late to call for help. All you can do is sit and pray to the Gods for mercy.

They'd come suddenly. Unlike anything you heard from the stories. There wasn't smoke in the distance warning their presence. It was just the distant clatter of hooves. And then chaos.

You'd been one of the lucky ones. Still in your home, bustling away when the screaming started. You'd locked your doors, bolted the windows. Even now, as you lay huddled in a ball, you knew it wouldn't be enough. You were just waiting for the inevitable.

Eventually, it came.

You were expecting something more violent. Windows being smashed. The wall torn apart. There was just a click and a squeak of your door. Heavy footsteps. Something was inside your home.

To your benefit, you don't whimper. Your breath hitches, but the beast's loud lumberings drown the noise. You can already tell that it's big. Each movement it makes causes your tiny home to rumble and shake.

You don't think. You just shove yourself under your tiny cot, trying to make as little noise as you can. You can hear your heartbeat thumping away in your chest, as you pray for it to slow down. You don't want to know if the thing in your home can hear it too.

It starts in your kitchen. You can hear it clamber away with pots and pans. The crushing of metal makes your head hurt as you imagine that being your skull. Then your furniture, a chair, thrown across the room, you can hear the wood shatter. That could be your limbs.

When it enters your bedroom. You stop breathing.

You can only see its boots. Big, nearly the size of your forearm, maybe even bigger. It muddles around your room, clumsily swiping away at the various knick-knacks and trinkets you have scattered across your room. The real horror begins when it starts to sniff the air, and you wonder if it can smell you.

You hear it's voice. Masculine, deep. He's saying words in a language you can't understand, it's foreign to your ears.

And then you're pulled from your sanctuary.

It doesn't matter how many times you've heard the story of the beasts ripping apart boulders with their bare hands, you kick and scream and collapse into sobs. The arms around your midriff don't budge. If anything they tighten, keeping you trapped with the thing you most feared.

You think you stay like that for hours. Or maybe time was slipping by, turning into sludge because your heart was going too fast and you surely thought that would kill you before the beast ever does. You squeeze your eyes shut, sobbing as you just wait for it to be over already.

Except, nothing happens. There's just this soft tapping against your cheek. He's speaking, again, that same deep tone that's strangely so soft.

"私を見て."

You want to keep your eyes shut, but perhaps, it's morbid curiosity that causes you to see who your murderer will be.

He's big, the largest man you've ever seen. He'd look human if it weren't for the textured skin, the fangs protruding from either side of his lips, the bright orange hair, the purple eyes that seemed to glow.

The most beautiful man you've ever seen. The most monstrous creature to ever exist.

He tilts his head. For a creature who is known to crush skulls and eat bones, he doesn't look very harmful. If anything, he's vulnerable. His chest is bare, only covered by shiny metal bracelets, while his bottom is covered by an animal pelt.

Yet, you stare back in terror. Looks don't mean anything. Not for beings like him.

Eventually, the orc nods, done examining you. Was he deciding you're a good enough kill? Before you can think anything further, he picks you up in his arms, effortlessly carrying you.

You've been crying and fighting and struggling for hours. All of it had tired you out. All what you can do is watch helplessly from his arms when he exits your home.

Your entire village is in shambles. Fire is everywhere. Blood is as common as water. It's horrifying. The scene haunts you even after the orc deposits your limp body on top of a horse.

Earlier he seemed rather unbothered with your struggles. Now, he gives an irritated sigh when you start to scream again. The orc wrestles your arms together, bundling them up with rope. Your mouth is muffled by a thick cloth. When you peer up at him helplessly, he gives you a stern look as if to say 'you brought this onto yourself'.

A sound of another horse's hooves is enough to remind you this orc didn't do this pillaging all by himself. Another orc saddles up to him. He's a bit smaller compared to the first one. Indigo hair with ivory tips. Despite their stark differences, their purple eyes look oddly similar to one another.

He gives your pathetic state a lookover, and then he scoffs.

Behind you, the orc that kidnapped you shrugs and says a few things. They go back and forth a bit and it sounded like they were arguing.

Eventually, there seems to be a clear victor. The orc rides off, as the first one gives a satisfied huff. When you fearfully look behind you, he just a condescending pat on your shoulder.

You think you pass out after that, because the next time you open your eyes, you're no longer on a horse.

The pelts under your skin are soft to the touch. You rise from the makeshift bed, looking at your surroundings. A large tent filled with soft furs and various trinkets.

You don't need to know who's it is.

He comes in hours later. Just as tall and terrifying when you first met him. He isn't adorned in weapons anymore. You cower nonetheless.

You curl inwards when he kneels in front of you. Even sitting down, he's humongous. His clawed hands unfurl, and he presents something to you.

You don't know what it is, but you know it's food.

You don't take it, suspicious. He seems to realize this as he takes a bite, before extending it back to you. Still, you refuse.

You can't figure out his endgame, yet. He hasn't kill you, does that mean he's waiting for the right moment? Is he planning on fattening you up before he eats you? You wished you could speak his language. Any answer is better than his silent torment.

After a while, he shrugs, muttering something, before gently placing it back on the plate. He still isn't done with you.

He points to himself.

"Beelzebub," he says. He repeats the motion a few more times before you understand that he's saying his name.

When he points to you, you shy away, refusing to answer. He doesn't seem angry at that, giving a thoughtful hum. You watch warily as Beelzebub pulls away, his interest falling to other things within the tent. Sharper things. He picks up a long knife, studying the blade.

You swallow, and then you decide to leave.

You'd barely begun to take a step before Beelzebub turns to look at you. He huffs, before pointing at the piles of furs. You don't need to know what he said. You stay put.

He puts the knife down, thankfully. He picks some other things, moving them around the tent mindlessly. At least he isn't looking at you. You think you'd go into hysterics if he just sat there, staring and staring and staring.

He's waiting for something. Someone.

Pretty soon, that person walks through the tent.

Not as large as Beelzebub, but big enough to terrify you. This orc had black hair. His red eyes racked over your figure, scrutinizing you with mild disgust.

Beelzebub greets him with a grunt. The newcomer sighs before going off in a foreign language. Beelzebub answers with a stagnant face. Another argument. You have a feeling both were about you.

Clearly, the orcs did not want you here. Then why did he bring you here? At that, relatively unharmed? What was the point of all of this?

Or perhaps the other orcs didn't understand their member's thought process either.

Eventually, Beelzebub shakes his head. He points at you.

"彼女は私の妻になります," he says.

The other orc frowns, but he doesn't respond. Beelzebub must have won. He just gives you another glance, before making his way back out the tent.

Beelzebub gives a satisfied grunt. You stiffen when he drops down to sit right in front of you.

He doesn't do anything. He just sits. He stares right at you. In response you press yourself against the tent walls, but there's no where to hide.

He reaches out to touch your cheek. You shudder.

"私の妻." When he smiles, his dangerous fangs poke out. "私のものだけ."

[gay-dorito-dust]

I come bearing a brainrot of a relatively normal s/o for the Lin Quei bois except s/o can see dead spirits and always keep a straight face. Sometimes they act weird bc they're avoiding a really nasty looking ghost and have grown numb to it. But when the bois finally catch a glimpse at the 'ghosts' their beloved mentioned all they see is some kind of eldritch horror. (This came from my recent fascination with the manga/anime series Mieruko-Chan)

Rate my really shitty attempt at creating eldritch creatures. (Actually don’t cuz I’m mega sensitive) 🦦

Tomas Vrbada

Ever since being forced by Johnny to watch horror movies, Tomas had been scared shitless when it comes to paranormal activity.

Ghosts, poltergeists, you name it, Tomas is scared of them all.

So when you -his seemingly normal but beloved partner- have been intentionally avoiding a certain spot in the Lin Kuei, shifting your gaze over in it’s direction now and then before ignoring it completely with a straight face, he didn’t think much do it at frisky but the more and more it has became the more Tomas started to feel an indescribable feeling within his chest.

It was the same feeling that he would often get when having been forced to watch a horror movie with Johny, that feeling where he knew something scary was about about to happen, which only worsened the longer the scene continued to build and ramp up the tension and to have him too scared to even look over his own shoulder; only to near enough be scared shitless a second later and loose hold of his popcorn.

Needless to say Tomas had been forced to watch one too many movie where the protagonist was somewhat clairvoyant to known that when you were giving a very specific area, out of the entire Lin Kuei no less, an cautious look. He knew better then to ever indulge in any amount of curiosity that he may have, even if it was a smidge, he would pretended that he saw nothing and would go about his day like normal. He wasn’t about to become one of those stupid characters who’d willingly go into a house that was very clearly haunted by visage alone!

He’s following your example right down to a T! He honestly doesn’t want to know what was lurking in that corner and he wasn’t particularly all that eager to find out either. Tomas would rather life the rest of his life in ignorant bliss if he could, but unfortunately for him that wasn’t going to be the case, for he had found himself having to go to that very room to get something for his brothers. However as soon as he opened the door, Tomas caught a glimpse of the thing in the corner that you’ve ominously warned him about.

It was hideous, so hideous in fact the sight of it made Tomas want to gag but he knew he couldn’t, so he slapped a hand over his mouth. The creature had bore the appearance of a pure bred Russian bear dog, but unfortunately for Tomas, that’s pretty much where the similarities started and stopped; For it had clusters of small, almost peddle sized eyes that were black as night taking up it’s entire face.

That wasn’t all, when the creature opened it’s mouth -if Tomas could even call it that- it’s stomach would rip open just as a thousand pair of what could only be described as human hands emerged out from said stomach, palms laying flat on the floor, as they began to shuffle across the floor in search of something. One particular pair of hands almost came into contact with Tomas’ foot, almost making him scream, but upon realising that their search efforts bore no fruit, the hands then retracted back into the creatures stomach, where it would then close itself up as though someone had just zipped it shut from the inside, before moving towards a different part of the room.

Scared out of his wits, Tomas bolted out of the room, completely forgetting what he had originally went there for, and just ran as fast as he could. He ran even when his legs began to hurt, he ran even when his lungs were begging for breath and he ran even when he had all but forgotten why he was even running in the first place. Tomas didn’t stop running until he saw you heading towards him, his brothers probably sent you to see what was taking him so long, and without a second thought; Tomas held you in his arms tightly, burying his head deep into your neck as he whispered.

‘How can you bare to seeing these things on a daily basis.’ The image of that thing was forcefully seared into Tomas’ mind, haunting him forever.

You didn’t have to ask further details as to what it was that he saw and instead reciprocated his hug, stroking the hairs at the back of his neck reassuringly, whilst pressing kisses into the side of his head where your would then rest your cheek against. ‘I don’t.’ You replied, looking straight ahead at the creature just as it poked it’s head out of the door, staring at you with all of their small beady black eyes before slinking off into the room across through the wall.

Kuai Liang

Concerned was a word that was often used to describe what Kuai Liang felt whenever you would shuffle closer towards his back, you might as well have been hiding, when passing down a particular hallway as your eyes were focused forward. Almost as though you were avoiding looking at something you didn’t like by pretending it didn’t exist.

Kuai Liang was aware of your uncanny ability to see the dead as you did the living, it was one of the things you disclosed to him upon first meeting, and even recalled the stories you’d tell him regarding the kinds of ghosts you’ve come across. Upon further questioning as to what they looked like you told Kuai Liang that most were human or humanoid in figure, but others went beyond the realm of human comprehension.

The latter of the two kinds were the ones you tended to avoid having direct contact with the most and this most recent one was no different.

‘Is it them, my love?’ Kuai Liang asked, looking over his shoulder at you worriedly.

You hummed. ‘They’re always with us, following but they most like to stay here and watch everyone who passes by.’

Kuai Liang pursed his lips at this new tidbit of information, whilst concerning learning this was, he was concerned about was getting you out of this hallway a lot more. Just as he was reaching back to grab your hand, Kuai Liang caught slight movement from out of the corner of his eye but before you could say anything, his eyes were already locked onto the other side of the hallway; more specifically the area you purposefully avoid looking towards every time you have to come down this hallway.

Kuai Liang remembered you telling him that It shouldn’t be possible for him see what you see, but it wasn’t uncommon for ghost to become temporarily visible. So with that in mind Kuai Liang could only deduct that what he was seeing before him what you regarded as a type two ghost; In all honesty the word ghost didn’t quite seem to match what he was currently seeing.

The creature in question was about his height, maybe a little shorter, then again he wasn’t quite sure considering it was sort of slouched. It appeared human enough in its physique, but something deep inside Kuai Liang told him that what was standing before him was far from human. He just couldn’t escape this deeply unsettling feeling that continued to grown within his chest the longer he continued to look. A sharp snapping sort of sound caught his ear, and in an instant his senses sharpened as Kuai Liang watched to see the creature viciously attempting in tearing it’s own face off with it’s hands that were infused with needles, as though desperate to get it off, to reveal…a smooth porcelain like mask beneath shredded and stringy bits of it’s former face.

As if watching that wasn’t enough the lower half of the smooth porcelain mask began to crack, a jagged fissure spread from one end to another like it was forming itself a mouth but once it had finished, the crack like mouth then began to open to reveal an endlessly dark void beneath and just before it could even think to speak; you quickly grabbed Kuai Liang’s hand and pulled him down the hallway until you were a safe distance from the creature. You could tell that seeing something like that had gotten to Kuai Liang, even if it was by a little margin.

‘Are you okay?’ You asked, squeezing his hand.

‘I fear for you little flame.’ Kuai Liang admitted. ‘Your gift for seeing these things, I worry that it will plunge you into the darkest depth that not even my fire would be nearly enough to guide you out safely.’ You smiled sympathetically at his concern. ‘As long as I don’t acknowledge them or give them a line of communication, then there’s nothing to worry about.’ You reassured him but you could tell that it wasn’t enough with the way his brows furrowed deeper with worry. ‘Doesn’t mean that I wont still worry about you.’ He utters, tightening his grip on your hand, afraid to let go.

‘I’m not expecting you to because no matter what I know you’ll always worry about me but I promise when I tell you that no harm can come to me if I don’t incite it. I’ve lived with this my entire life, all I ask of you is to trust me.’ You practically begged as you stared Kuai Liang deep into his eyes and watched as he sighed before pressing his head against your own. ‘I trust you with my life, little flame.’ He says in a hushed whisper. ‘However it’s within my duty to protect you from all harm, living or not.’ You smiled at his warm words, closing your eyes as you learnt in towards his natural warmth.

‘Then at least let me protect you from time to time.’ You cheeked, causing Kuai Liang to let out a deep chuckle as he pressed a little kiss to your lips. ‘I won’t make any promises.’ He cheeked.

Bi-Han

Now Bi-Han wouldn’t say he whether he did or didn’t believe in ghosts, but even if he did he wouldn’t be one to actively try to prove their existence. He was the Grandmaster of the Lin Kuei, he had no time for such childish ridiculousness, not when there were more pressing matters that were more worthy of his time and effort anyway.

However when you first told him that you could see ghosts, Bi-Han didn’t know what to make of it, he’s not one to discredit your abilities in anyway shape or form. He’s not like Tomas who watches one too many horror movies and starts flinching at every subtle creak or groan of the floorboards. Yet that doesn’t mean he didn’t find your power intriguing because after all Bi-Han is a man who strives to know more, he strives for knowledge and so he would take this opportunity to fully understand how exactly your power works.

He even takes note how you purposefully ignore an area with everything you had, keeping your head down or eyes facing forward whenever you had to go anywhere near it, coming out of the room with a straight face as though you weren’t fazed but Bi-Han was well trained in knowing when his intended target was lying and or on edge. Upon asking why you were avoiding that specific part of the Lin Kuei, he took in everything you told him about the ghost that you encountered, engraving every last detail it into his head as to paint himself a picture, but even then Bi-Han doesn’t think it remotely resembles the creature that you saw.

Never did he think that he would ever see it for himself but one day he did indeed find himself staring into the unsettlingly large, bulging eyes of the creature as it breathed heavily, as though it was severely out of breath and was just now recovering. It was about half his size and had hair covering everywhere…well except its midsection, which was all just leathery skin that rose and fell with its breathing pattern. It’s hands were human but everything else about it wasn’t, it had lost it’s lower mouth, leaving only it’s top row of sharp teeth; making the question of how it could possibly eat or consume anything to Bi-Han’s morbid curiosity.

The creature then proceeded to close the distance between the two of them and all Bi-Han could smell was death, blood and rotting flesh but he wasn’t fazed. He was aware of what the creature was doing and wasn’t about to give it the reaction it so desperately wanted, he was above these childish attempts of intimidation; So in retaliation Bi-Han only narrowed his eyes, presenting himself in a way that told the creature that he could see what it was doing and that he was above such tactics. He could see why you’d avoid looking upon these things, they could send a weaker minded person to the brink of insanity upon first glance, but Bi-Han was made of much tougher material to succumb to such.

The creature backed of, finding no enjoyment in this at all, and left the room through the wall on all fours for much weaker prey, looking like some dog with a sever case of mange.

Later that day where you and Bi-Han were settling down for the night, Bi-Han then decided to admit to what he saw prior, not liking to keep such things from you especially when it’s in regards to your powers. ‘I saw it.’ He said point blank as he stroked your back and it took you a moment to realise what he had meant by that before a look of realisation spread across your face. ‘You did? I thought that wasn’t possible.’ You replied.

‘It was only a glimpse but what I saw, I saw it as clear as I see anything else.’ Bi-Han told you, wondering how it was that you could keep your psyche intact when seeing such vile creatures on a daily basis. He even wondered if you’ve seen some that were even more grotesque then the one he had encountered earlier.

‘Not exactly a pleasant sight are they?’ You joked, looking at him with a small smile, knowing firsthand how unnerving it was to know that such things could possibly exist, even though you did finally mange to find a routine you had followed religiously in the events where you did happen to encounter them. Unfortunately It never truly gets rid of your first experience with seeing them for the first time, firmly believing that you were going to die due to how horrific and fear inducing they were.

‘No, I’m guessing that I’m right in assuming that this one pales in comparison to others you’ve had the misfortune of seeing?’ Bi-Han asked, watching your every expression like a that of a hawk. ‘Way worse.’ You responded as you snuggle yourself deeper into his chest, closing your eyes to avoid looking at the glowing pair of eyes that peered into yours and Bi-Han’s room.

[corrodedcoughin]

From the outside Eddie presents as a person with very little care for the opinions of others. This however is a shield, an armour class so high that no roll is beating him. Or so he likes to think. Truth is, it's shitty armour that would dissolve in water. But he can't let anyone know that. Needs to keep up appearances, needs to keep performing. 

This would all be fine if it weren't for the fact that Steve Harrington is aiming a metaphorical water pistol at his heart at point blank range. 

When did it start? Oh, who knows! 

Eddie knows, oh Eddie knows alright. Shamefully it wasn't even a mind-meltingly-he’s-so-hot-take-me-now moment that made Eddie's weevil brain latch onto the idea of Steve and never let go. No. It was during lunch period, because is there really a more romantic setting to have your heart shattered and reformed into the image of your new love? You see Eddie was attacked! Ambushed by his feelings! The traitors! He was mid conversation with Jeff about the best unconventional food combinations. Eddie was arguing for bananas with sliced cheese and was not being given a fair hearing on the matter when he turned his head at the most inopportune moment. The moment that ruined everything. Because in that head swivel Eddie saw Steve being Steve. He saw 'The Hair' without the mask. Steve had been tapped on the shoulder by one of his sport boys and had turned around to display a perfectly normal serious face. Except, on that serious face was two carrot sticks placed in his mouth like walrus tusks before he decided to further ruin Eddie by breaking out in the most disgustingly beautiful fit of laughter. Then! Then he had the audacity to take the sticks out and shove them up his nose. This was complete idiot behaviour and Eddie had never been more endeared in his life. Fuck. 

'Ground control to Munson, anyone in there?' Before Eddie could register what was happening Gareth had appeared from behind and started knocking on Eddie's head. Gareth could try all he wanted, Eddie was in a severe case of ooey gooey heart eyes over The Societal Norm that was Steve Harrington. 

'You okay man? You look vaguely constipated. More than usual I mean. You eat too many of those vitamin gummies again?' Gareth had taken a seat next to Eddie now and was promptly swapping out their lunch trays. His chocolate pudding to Eddie, Eddie's vanilla to Jeff and two applesauces to Ian. In return Gareth got an extra pretzel, no sweet tooth on that boy, which they all agreed was concerning and confirmed their theory that Gareth did not have earthly origins. 

'Dude shut up. And anyway it was ONE time. AND WHO TOLD YOU?' He didn't mean to shout but when a man's bowel's movements are brought up in a public setting what else is he to do? And...and oh no. Oh no, no. Eddie had turned back to get another sneaky look at Steve and was met by the whole table staring back. The whole table including Steve. Steve that was now making eye contact with Eddie while smiling in a deliciously confused way. Delicious?? Why was he giving Steve food adjectives? Who was he becoming? Next thing he'll be wanting to take a bite out of him!...maybe...maybe that wasn't such a bad idea actually, file that in his ‘think about later’ box.

'Harrington is totally staring at you. Eddie stop looking at him, stop! Do not engage with them! I swear to god I just want one lunch without drama!' Jeff said, finally breaking into Eddie's consciousness. 

Feeling himself going bright red Eddie returned to his body just as Steve waved with a carrot stick in hand. Bright red was now a thing of the past. Eddie's face was crimson. Eddie’s entire body could probably be used as a beacon for airplanes looking to land. Eddie's only option now was to seek employment as a court jester in order to make use of his permanently altered complexion.  Internally screaming, and maybe very quietly outwardly screaming too, Eddie swivelled abruptly in his seat. Fixed his gaze on the table in front of him and absolutely did not think about pretty Steve looked with a vegetable stuck in his face holes. Except he did and didn’t stop thinking about it for a long time.

[oukabarsburgblr]

Hello! I am new, and wanted to ask 3 things for you:

1.) Is Daichi a type of yandere, and why is he obsessed with the reader?

2.) Are you maybe interested in writing JJK?

3.) Can I be 🎃 anon?

-🎃 Have nice day studying/whatever your busy doing, keep up the good work ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

Hello there and 3) yes u can be 🎃 anon, reminds me of that one game kubz scouts played for days on end. Pumpkin race? The one with the time that he tried to one up haha

1) to be honest, its been a while since i wrote that fanfiction and ever since then ive been focusing on my ocs so much hshsh. I do think daichi can be classified as a psychopath. A yandere? I wouldnt say he loves the reader (during his third year) and i could say for a fact even he acknowledges he doesnt harbor romantic feelings for the reader until much later (after the training camp shenanigan) however, he did harvest some type of attraction to the reader. An unhealthy one. Where the dynamic is between an object and an owner? Not a pet or a partner, but an object instead. Something he can switch on and off, mold into his liking and reader just so happened to be a perfect victim for it. Although he does grow to be fond of you, ever since how obedient you became. So many screaming nights passed in your house.

Now came the question of why? Why did he do all of this? Why did he instigate it the second the reader came into his view? I tried explaining it in the second part of the fic. Sugawara and Asahi would have treated reader like any other first year if it werent for Daichi. Maybe suga a bit sociopathic but daichi was the match that started the flame.

I think it came from the canon fact that Daichi was the rock of the team, their anchor, their foundation. I thought of him as someone youd look up to, youd rely on but there had to be days where he wasnt feeling himself right? Where he finds all of them a tad bit annoying, but that wouldnt be nice, they were his friends after all. And you came into the picture. On a bad day, where he just felt shitty and you suddenly came stumbling into the club, making a ruckus, curse words from your mouth scratching his eardrums and a thought slipped his mind where he found you so fucking annoying. However, it wouldnt be fair to thrust all that negative energy onto you so he did what he could, ignoring you until he could cool himself down. Maybe the day after he could find himself talking to you again. Wrong. He still finds you annoying and rude. Then there was this urge that came from deep within his stomach, this feral desire to grasp at you, clench at your face, pulling your skin back so you would behave- Too much blood so no can do. He still found you annoying though, hence, the snowball rolls where he decided to just change you. Sugawara and Asahi was a massive help, pinning you into the corner until he had you cumming around his finger.

If given the chance, where there would be no repurcussions, no trace of any evidence whatsoever, Daichi Sawamura would have murdered you, killing you in cold blood and burying your body deep within the mountains. A heavy burden would lift from his shoulders and he felt like the world would work his way again. But there was no solid plan for it so he never took the chance nor thought to.

Can you tell that Daichi is my favourite? Hahaha ive said this like three times now. I loveeeee him.

2) would i ever write jjk! One of my favourite readers have requested a satosugu x bottom male reader in my inboxes and i will consider but heres the thing.

I dont watch jjk😭

Well, i did, until i dropped it. I think it was at episode 20+ on season 1. I used to be a huge shounen person but now im a slice of life fan (although they can be quite boring sometimes) i guess im more into thrillers but in a normal setting? But i know jjk characters.

I used to have an obsession w sukuna haha. Ik maki, ik zenin naoya, ik todo aoi, like ik them and ik what happened to them (rip nanami) but idk i think i have to get hooked on really well for me to watch jjk so that i can write it. We'll see deffo! But i plan to watch chainsaw man first hshshs

[cherriegyuu]

breaking point | yjh

pairing: jeonghan x fem!reader genre: angst word count: 1.5k a/n: something to celebrate jeonghan's birthday, who even writes angst as birthday present?

this is part of my series, seventeen as songs from lover (ts)

Jeonghan ➝ AfterglowThis ultraviolet morning light below Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh ↳ Jeonghan was never one to lose his patience with people, least of all you. But one day a fight gets out of control and it leaves you wondering if your relationship has come to an end.

The sound of the door closing still echoed through your mind. It had been hours since Jeonghan left but you were still sitting in the same spot, eyes locked on the door as if he was going to burst through at any second. 

You knew that he wasn't. At that moment you didn’t even know if you'd ever see Jeonghan again. He was so angry when he left, rightfully so. 

All of your fights had been rational ones, both of you would calm down for a little a while before talking again. The screaming matches weren't something either of you were into but your fights had never gotten that big before. Not even once. 

It seemed as if the one thing you had always been afraid of finally came to light. 

You and Jeonghan weren't well matched, you were too different. From the way you were raised to the way you saw the world. 

Jeonghan had an almost romantic view of everything around him. While he was one to play an infinite amount of pranks on his friends, he was never overly mean about it – if he was mean at all –, and those pranks only happened because he wanted to win whichever game they were playing. To him, because he wasn't someone who would intentionally hurt anyone, it was hard to understand why someone would. And while you thought that was beautiful, that trace of naivety, you also saw it as infuriating.

So when a coworker went over him, and claimed Jeonghan's project as his own, you couldn't hold back the petty I told you he would do that to you. Because you had in fact talked to Jeonghan so many times about it. However, Jeonghan didn't seem to see it, at all.

"I don't think we should be having this conversation right now" he sighed, sitting on the opposite side of the couch. 

He was tired and stressed, the last thing he needed was to hear those words from you. Especially when all he wanted the entire day was to get to you, rest his head over your thighs while you played with his hair.

But you didn't seem to see it or you didn't care, he wasn't too sure. 

"This is the exact moment we should be having this conversation because when morning comes you'll just forget about this feeling and you'll let him or any other idiot out there do the same thing to you  again"

Jeonghan couldn't help the distressed groan that left him. He hated how the whole situation sounded like a joke coming from your lips, how you had this little spark in your eyes — as if you were enjoying his misery.

"You can't possibly be angry at me," you said "I told you again and again that he was an asshole, that he would screw you over the second he got the chance. Like always, you didn't listen. The world isn't this great place, Jeonghan. Your friends are awesome but the world is actually really shitty and, apparently, you're the only that doesn't fucking see it"

He shook his head at you and stood up. Jeonghan pushed his feet inside his shoes and opened the other.

"You're leaving?"

"You know, the most rational part of my brain told me not to come here today" he scoffed, voice slightly rising "Because I knew you'd pull this shit and this was the last thing I needed"

You stood up but didn't dare to move an inch closer to him.

"I didn't do anything!"

"I wanted to be comforted!" he all but screamed "I had an awful day and all I wanted, all I needed, was for you to tell me that everything was going to be okay, that maybe I could talk with my boss and show him that it was actually me who did all the work. But you decided that what I needed was to remember feeling like shit"

All of your neighbors could probably hear the fighting. Jeonghan held the door open, chest heaving in evident distress.  

"Please let me know when you find my girlfriend, because whoever this is" he waved his hand  in your direction "isn't her"

He slammed the door shut behind him, hard enough that you felt the windows shake. 

It had been over three hours since Jeonghan left and the only difference was that you sat back down. You couldn't move or anything else. 

While you were talking with him, you knew that you were pushing him too far, saying more than you should. It wasn't the time, everything was wrong. Yet, you couldn't stop the words from coming out.

You knew that you were projecting. That there was no real reason for you to be acting that way, Jeonghan did nothing and was right, all he needed was comfort. And maybe it was your own insecurities talking, your shit month at work, how although you told him otherwise you always behaved just like him and your coworkers were throwing their work at you and did nothing about it. The you acted with Jeonghan was the way you should have reacted at your own job but the words simply died on your lips whenever they were around.

You grabbed your phone from the couch, it was almost two in the morning. You knew Jeonghan was probably home by then but still, you wanted to make sure. Touching your phone a few times, you called Seungkwan.

"Is he home yet?" you asked as soon as the line connected.

"Hello to you too" you could picture Seungkwan rolling his eyes “and yes, he’s home”

Silence followed. You didn’t have anything else to say and you knew Seungkwan was probably a little angry at you. His voice had a little edge to it. You knew Jeonghan, he probably didn’t say anything to his roommate, but it was written all over his face that you had gotten into a fight. 

“Should I leave the door unlocked?” Seungkwan asked with a sigh.

Finally, your eyes filled with tears and you let out a sob. The tears refused to fall since Jeonghan left. The tightness in your throat was so unbearable that it was a wonder you managed to say those four words tho Seungkwan. 

“Don’t cry, fix it” he said before ending the call.

On your way to Jeonghan’s place, your mind was racing. The darkest part of your brain took over and made you believe that your relationship had come to an end, that the fight had been so bad that you had finally reached a point of no return. It took everything in you to not ask the driver to take you back home. 

There was only one way you could ever find out if it was actually over. 

Like he said, Seungkwan left the door unlocked and was kind enough to keep the lights on in the living room. Locking the door behind you, you used your phone as a guide to Jeonghan’s room at the end of the hallway. 

You opened the door quietly, to not startle him or his roommate. 

Jeonghan had his back turned to the door, body curled into a small ball. You got into bed behind him, legs adjusting to his and you wrapped your arm around his waist, forehead pressed to back.

Jeonghan’s body stiffened for a second and then relaxed once he realized it was you. 

“I’m sorry,” you said before he could say anything “I don’t know why I said those things, why I didn’t just hug you and say that it was going to be okay, that we could find a way to fix it”

Jeonghan turned on the bed, now facing you. The room was so dark you could barely make out the shape of his body, even after your eyes had gotten used to the lack of light.

“I need you to understand limits, yn. Sometimes you just keep pushing and pushing, and you don’t notice when the other person is at their limit”

His voice was low, a mixture of sleep and resentment. 

“And I end up hurting the people I love the most,” you said quietly, you ran your hand up from his chest to his neck. It wasn’t sexual in any way, you just needed to feel him as much as possible, needed him to understand that you meant every word that you said “I’m really sorry. I don’t want to give you excuses, I just want to apologize. I don’t want to hurt you, ever. All I want to do is to love you, show you all the bright and beautiful places in the world. Always. Forever”

Jeonghan held your face and kissed your forehead, your nose, your cheeks, and finally your lips. He tucked your head on the crock of his neck and for a second it was so easy to lose yourself in him.

“Sleep now, love. We can talk more in the morning” 

He hugged you tightly and that was enough to give you hope that maybe there was still some part of your relationship that could be saved. 

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[lucajayms]

i sincerely apologize for the rant

pre bullets gerard plsplsplspls!!!! they have an office crush at cartoon network then she moves away without telling anyone and they replace her (CUBICLES BEST SONG EVER) so then he just keeps wondering what may have happened, until mcr are playing like in another city during revenge era then mikey sees her in the crowd before a show and he goes to gerard right before going onstage and its like hey gerard remember that girl you talked about 24/7 in 2001, shes here tonight. and gee just freaks out while trying to play down the whole performance becase hes scared she wont like the whole fake blood/gay/screaming thing. then they finish the performance and he goes to find her and shes like all happy bc she knew he was gonna do much better things than to work at a shitty office. and shes a big comic book artist and does really weid like blood and vampire stuff so shes so happy that gerard also does weird blood vampire stuff. and then theyre happy and then the umbrella academy happens and yea

yea youre free to ignore this, i just have too much free time to imagine shit like this 👍

HELP I LOVE THIS SO SO MUCH!

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CUBICLES

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gerard way x reader she/her used use of y/n

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masterlist

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warnings: swearing!

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"Maybe you could draw her more like this to bring out the background more so she's not just stiff," I instructed him. Gerard is a very talented artist, he just has a little bit of trouble deciding what to put where.

"But I feel like if she was a little different, due to her design, she'd go flat," Gerard argues, putting his pencil where he was describing.

I sigh as I place my hand delicately to my chin, trying to see what he's talking about. The deadline is soon and he's not done pitching these characters. "Honestly, Gerard? Whatever feels right. You'll get her."

"You sure?" He asks, seeking confirmation in my words.

I smile, nodding my head, "Yeah. Deadline is tomorrow, just do whatever feels right!" I say before I'm off to my cubicle to continue my project.

I knew he was looking at me. For weeks now, it had become a pattern—one I could almost draw if I could figure out how to capture that lingering gaze in ink. He thought he was subtle, keeping his distance and asking me barely relevant questions about some “project” or “character design” he’d been working on. Gerard was charming, though; there was no denying that. Quiet, a little too good at staring at his desk, and adorably oblivious to how easy it was to read him.

“Hey, uh, (Y/N)?” I looked up from my sketchbook, where I’d been mindlessly drawing a graveyard scene—something I had an odd fascination with lately. Gerard was standing there, hands stuffed in his pockets, wearing that awkward half-smile that looked better on him than it should.

“Gerard,” I said, glancing up with a smirk. “To what do I owe the honor?”

He chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “I…uh…just wanted to see what you were working on.”

I flipped my sketchbook shut, even though I knew he was dying to see what I’d been drawing. “Just some stuff. You’d probably think it’s too creepy.”

“Try me.”

Maybe it was because I wanted to test him, see how he’d react to what was under the surface, but I opened the book back up and turned it to face him. His eyes widened as he took in the vampires, blood, and dark cemeteries I’d sprawled across the pages.

“You…actually drew all of this?”

I shrugged, trying to keep my cool. “It’s not much. Just whatever’s in my head.”

He laughed, this soft, surprised sound. “Whatever’s in your head is amazing.” He paused, his eyes lingering a second too long.

I grinned, leaning back in my chair. “Well maybe not everything, Way.” I tossed my pen onto my desk, feigning nonchalance. “Can’t have too many weirdos like me around. Bad for the office’s reputation.”

And that's why I left.

Maybe I should’ve told him I was leaving. I hated the idea of going without a goodbye, but part of me figured I’d see him again. He’d get over it. Life had a way of carrying people in different directions, and honestly? I couldn’t stand the thought of another month behind that desk. I needed to be somewhere I could let these ideas out, somewhere that didn’t expect me to keep my weirdness behind a closed sketchbook.

The day I left, I watched the office fade from my rearview mirror, fingers tapping the steering wheel as a familiar guilt crept in. I didn’t leave him my number or my address or even a hint of where I’d gone. Some part of me hoped he’d figure it out. But after that, there was just silence.

Gerard

She left without a word. Just…gone. I tried to keep going like I didn’t notice, told myself it wasn’t a big deal. But the absence gnawed at me, creeping into every sketch and unfinished character. (Y/N) was gone, and I had no clue where she’d gone or why. I stopped asking questions after a while, but I couldn’t stop thinking about her. The thought became like an echo in my mind, constant and inescapable, pushing me to drown it out with anything I could find.

And I did.

One show after another, one drink, one line, whatever I could find to keep the silence at bay. The stage helped a little—at least there, I had the lights in my eyes and the noise blocking out the mess in my head. I’d stand in front of the crowd, hands dripping with fake blood, trying to exorcise whatever pieces of myself felt missing. But then the high would fade, and I’d be left in a dark room, trying to ignore the question that refused to die.

Where did she go?

I kept the band going, kept pretending it didn’t matter, kept letting the weight build. It wasn’t like I had any choice. The shows were packed, and the screams of the crowd felt like both a relief and a punishment. They had no idea. No idea that some days, it felt like I’d never get off this damn ride, that maybe I’d crash and burn right here. But something shifted in 2004. I couldn’t explain it—maybe it was seeing my friends’ faces or feeling the burn of another empty night. But I knew that if I kept going like this, I’d lose everything. I’d lose myself.

I finally made the decision to clean up, and in August 2004, I was clean. Free. My body hated me for it, and my brain wasn’t much friendlier, but I had to get clean. I couldn’t keep living on the edge of destruction. Every day after that, it felt like I was shedding pieces of the person I’d become just to survive. By the time I left, I was…well, I was alive. And that had to be enough.

It had been nearly a year since I’d gotten clean, and for the first time, it felt like I could really breathe on stage again. I could look out at the faces in the crowd and see them. Really see them, not just the blur of movement and lights I’d been numbing myself to. This was what I’d always wanted. This was where I wanted to be.

"MANHATTAN!" I scream into the mic and the crowd before more goes wild. "We are going to FUCK SOME SHIT UP TONIGH!"

And as I say that, Mikey plays the beginning of Give Em' Hell Kid. The set goes without hiccups, the crowd is perfect, and the most I've seen in a few weeks. Right as we leave the stage before the encore, Frank grabs me by my collar.

"Holy shit, Gee," He starts, and concern bubbles in my stomach. Did I do something wrong?

"What? What is it?"

He shakes his head vigorously, "I don't know if I'm tripping, but I swear to God I saw the girl you keep drawing in the crowd."

Fuck.

"What?!" I exclaim.

"Thirty seconds to encore!" One of the stagehands yells.

"Frank, where did you see her?" I ask, frantic. There's no possible way she could be here tonight. Why would she be here tonight.

"Our left, by the barricade. I think?" He explains, looking up to recount exactly where he saw her. My heart thuds against my ribcage as Frank’s words sink in, and I feel my throat tighten. (Y/N)? Here? After all these years?

"Ten seconds!" the stagehand yells, clapping his hands. Mikey shoots me a quick look, and Frank gives me a small, reassuring nod. There’s no time to think or even process—I’m barely holding onto the last traces of composure as we rush back on stage. I grab the mic, trying to get my focus back on the crowd, but every nerve in me is lit up, wondering if (Y/N) is really here tonight.

“MANHATTAN!” I shout again, forcing energy into my voice, hoping it’s enough to cover the wild surge of emotions that’s slamming through me. “YOU READY FOR ONE LAST ROUND?”

The crowd screams, and the band jumps into Helena, the encore I should be ready to pour my soul into. But all I can think about is her—her face, the way she used to sketch, her laugh. The lights are blinding, and I try to keep my focus on the crowd, but my eyes keep searching, desperate to find a glimpse of her. I don’t know if I’m imagining it, but by the end of the song, I swear I see her—a flash of her hair, bright eyes, her face half-turned away in the crush of people, but unmistakably her.

The song ends, and we give a final shout before exiting the stage. As soon as we’re out of sight of the crowd, I turn to Frank, breathless.

“You’re absolutely sure it was her?” I ask, gripping his shoulder.

“Fuck, I don't know how accurate your drawings are,” he says, his voice serious. “Bit it was her, Gee. I’m sure of it.”

“Holy shit,” I breathe, running a hand through my hair as the adrenaline surges through me again. "Where do I even start looking?"

Frank raises an eyebrow. “I’d start by getting your ass back out there before she disappears again. You just finished the show. You’ve got maybe five minutes before the crowd starts spilling out.”

I don’t waste another second. I dart down the steps, half-running, half-pushing past crew members as I head toward the audience exit. It feels like the longest, most insane few minutes of my life, weaving through the backstage area until finally, I’m in the thick of the crowd, scanning every face I can. And then—I see her.

She’s lingering by the side of the barricade, glancing around, half-smiling to herself like she might leave at any moment. She’s a little older, a little different, but I’d know her anywhere. I take a deep breath, feeling my hands start to shake, and then I call out, loud enough to cut through the noise.

“(Y/N)!”

She turns, her eyes finding mine, and for a moment, it’s like everything around us goes still. Her face lights up, and I swear I feel that same electricity that ran between us in the office all those years ago.

"Oh my god, you guys did so good!" She laughed, too, shaking her head. “Gee, look at you! Rockstar Gerard. I always knew you’d end up doing something wild, but I never expected…” She gestured at my blood-stained shirt and smeared makeup. “This.”

I rubbed the back of my neck, heat creeping up my face. “Yeah, well, it’s, uh, a little different from Cartoon Network, that’s for sure. But I never thought I’d see you at a show.”

“Oh, please,” she grinned, giving me a playful nudge. “I knew you’d be doing something big. You were always too talented to be stuck behind a desk, remember?”

I laughed, surprised by the surge of relief that came with her words. “Guess it’s been a while since anyone told me that.”

She softened, and something flickered across her face. “I'm sorry I disappeared. I had to move, and things got in the way, and…” Her voice trailed off, and she shrugged, a little awkwardly. “I never thought we’d run into each other again.”

“Same here,” I admitted, looking down. “But I’m glad we did. Even if it’s, uh…” I glanced at my blood-streaked hands, shaking my head. “Like this.”

She laughed, a bright, genuine sound, and I felt my nerves ease a little. “Honestly, I kind of love it. I’m doing comics, Gee. Lots of, you know…gory, bloody, vampire stuff. Seems like we’re both into weird stuff now.”

“Every time I go into a comicbook store, I look for your name.” I say, feeling a familiar spark of admiration light up in my chest.

“Yeah, well,” she shrugged, but her smile told me she was proud. “I kept drawing, kept pushing for it, and here we are. I got some stuff out that's been somewhat successful, but you—you’re the one really living the dream.”

It felt surreal, standing there with her, years and miles from where we’d left off. She was still (Y/N)—the girl who got me, who somehow saw through everything. But she was different, too. Confident, sharp, like she’d grown in ways I never got to see. And she was right here.

We fell into silence, the crowd thinning around us. Finally, I took a deep breath. “You know, after you left…I wasn’t great, to be honest.”

Her brow furrowed, and she gave me a sympathetic look. “I figured,” she said quietly. “It was a pretty messed-up time for both of us.”

I nodded, knowing she got it. “Yeah, I got pretty lost for a while. It took me…a lot to get back on track, but I’m good now. Clean, you know? And I’m just trying to keep my head on straight, one show at a time.”

She smiled, reaching out to squeeze my shoulder. “Good,” she said, her voice full of warmth. “That’s what you deserve, Gerard. You don’t need anything dragging you down.”

I felt something click into place then—a kind of peace I hadn’t felt in years. “Thanks, (Y/N). Really.”

She grinned, glancing around like she was taking in the whole scene again. “Hey, I think we’re due for a major coffee catch-up. I want to hear everything.”

I chuckled, feeling that old sense of ease wash over me. “Deal,” I said, grinning back. “But only if you show me your sketchbooks. I wanna see all the vampire blood and gore.”

She laughed, rolling her eyes. “You got it. Only fair, since I’ve got a feeling you’ve been drawing me for years anyway.”

I couldn’t help but laugh, and together, we walked out into the night, talking like no time had passed at all. And this time, I knew she wasn’t going anywhere.

(Y/N)

What a fucking life. Leaving Gerard like that in 2001 did something to me, you know? Fucked me up. I felt really fucking bad.

But it's okay. We're good. And by good? I mean my boyfriend is the fucking lead singer of My Chemical Romance. Like, who gets to say that?!

After their final tour ended, Gerard was bugging me more and more about his comic that he was writing and that he desperately wanted me to illustrate for it. Apparently, he had been working on it for around three years, and he wasn't getting anywhere by himself.

"I don't know, baby. I got deadlines," I always say, but God, who could say know to that pretty face of his.

And so I finally agreed to illustrate The Umbrella Academy.

And boy, did that change my life.

[jellyfishoreo1206]

Comfort (Gavril)

This will be a series w/ all the Bubo characters (Gavril, Angelo, Nostre, Daniel, Aku, maybe Tooth too) Love it when my brain comes up with ideas when I have several other WIP's to do

I was crying earlier and my brain in the middle of it went, "but what if the Bubo Characters were here."

WARNINGS: EMOTIONAL, CRYING, CUSSING, OVERALL BAD BAD DAY, ANGST IG??? I HAVE NO IDEA THERE WILL BE LOOTS OF FLUFF THO

Gender-Neutral Reader

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You felt like crying, screaming.

Everything was shit, every single hour that went by, every single minute, every single second felt long and torturous. Your body felt heavy, head heavy as it pounded with a throbbing headache against your skull, vision blurry.

Why did today of all days in the year have to be so shitty? You woke up late for work, got coffee all over your work clothes and didn't have a spare, got chewed out by your boss because how you forgot to do something yesterday and how you were "representing" the workplace, didn't eat lunch because you forgot to bring your wallet, and so many other things that made you want to wallow into the ground and forget about everything.

Anger, misery, sadness, irritation, annoyance, depression.

You want to cry so bad, you want to break something. Throw something. Anything.

But the moment you walked through your door, the dams broke. Sliding down to the floor, you cried your heart out, you cried out to no one as the bitter tears spilled down your face, dropping onto the floor. It felt pathetic, on your arms and knees just because nothing went right today, nothing went how was suppose to, crying out everything you had to the shadows around you. Wailing out to only the silence that surrounded you.

But it couldn't be helped, keeping every single thing bottled up over the last few months, constantly filling up the cup. This was eventually bound to happen. It was only a matter of time before the water spilled over the edge.

It felt like hours hunched over on the floor, a puddle of tears forming as your wails soon turned to soft hiccups and quiet sniffling. Your throat hurt from all the wailing, nose filled to the brim with runny snot, vision blurred and puffy from the tears with more coming, your limbs going numb from how long they were on the ground. Yet you didn't want to get up, you didn't have the energy to do so.

You stayed there for a few minutes longer taking several deep breaths, building up your energy, before slowly standing up from that position. Your joints popped as you started moving, relieved to be moving again.

You felt disconnected from the world, everything around you seemed to have been numbed down. You felt bland, empty. Every limb in your body felt heavier than before, mind becoming foggy the longer you stood there staring off into space. Your brain went on autopilot, searching for a place to rest, which was the couch.

The fog felt like a long-awaited hug, a hug that feels like it's enveloping your entire body, a hug without warmth. It's just, there...

Curling up on yourself, you laid there wide awake as not even an ounce of sleep crept into your mind as the hours ticked by, you didn't even bother checking the time. Didn't bother getting up.

It was just so easy to just stay there, not worry about anything else, in the moment. Letting the clouds fog your mind as you let your body relax into the cushions.

After what was probably two hours, you hear the familiar sound of footsteps upstairs, creaking against the old floorboards. You didn't even bother panicking about who it was, you didn't feel ready to come out of the comforting fog yet. The footsteps went down the stairs, right next to the couch, yet you didn't feel an ounce of fear go through you. Heartbeat as calm as it could be, beating against your ribcage in a calming manner. Whoever it was can do what they want, you don't even have a care to give.

"Y/N?" You perked up a bit, eyes glancing up at the person looking over from the stairs. It was Gavril, hood still on as his eerily bright eyes shined through the dark. It still scares you how bright his eyes are in the dark, staring at your form unblinking, intensely. Like a kind of cat of sorts. Maybe a perk from the goo. He quickly descends the rest of the stairs, pulling off his hood to reveal his dark curly hair.

You didn't move, just letting a sigh pass your lips as you stared off again. You should've been more excited that Gavril was here, it's been 3 months since you last saw him in person. But you literally cried everything out hours ago, your brain to exhausted to make a reaction. Gavril approaches closer, to where he's hovering over the couch. He seemed.., concerned about you. His brows were furrowed as he had a slight frown on his face. It doesn't seem like he knows how to act whenever someone is like this. He slowly reached out a hand, brushing some of the hairs out of the way that have fallen over your face in a gentle manner.

For a couple of minutes, that's all he does, over and over. Eventually he sits right next to you on the couch, your head in his lap as he gently combs his fingers through your hair.

It feels nice, to be right against him as his touch left a certain type of warmth in your nerves, filling your mind with a good emotion you can't quite put a name to. Eyes fluttering close, you enjoy the gesture, further relaxing your body into his as he continues the gesture. The events of today slowly melting from your mind as the seconds pass.

When his hand was about to pull away, your own grabbed at his wrist, refusing for the affection to be over so soon. "Not yet.." Your voice is hoarse, from your lack of words in the past hours and from the crying. Gavril hasn't said anything, he doesn't point out how you sound, all he does is cup your face in a comforting manner. Exhaustion hits your body like a train, as your mind slowly fades in and out from consciousness, not processing anything around you as you let yourself go.

"I'll be here in the morning.."

...

How did you end up in your bed?

Groggily, you looked around. Yeah you're definitely in your room. Couldn't tell the time though, it was cloudy outside and made the whole room darker, can't tell if it was early morning or the afternoon. You don't remember making the walk upstairs last night, all you remember was curling up on your couch and..

Gavril.

"Fuck, Gavril!" Quickly getting out of bed, and nearly face-planting into the wall, you scrambled out of the room and downstairs to see if he was still here. To see if he actually stayed.

After finally taking the last step, you hear a soft humming from the living room. Glancing over to your right, and there he was, patiently sitting there with something in hand. A old rubix cube you were meant to solve. His coat was discarded, some rips and tears in it, folded neatly on the couch arm as he kept twisting and turning the cube. Didn't seem like he wanted to figure it out, just needed something to busy his mind and hands. Fucking shit, you missed him so badly..

Coming up right behind the couch, you wrap your arms around him, smushing your face into his hair. Which probably wasn't a good idea since he didn't take a shower but you brushed off his smell, only seeking his touch. You felt him jump a bit beneath you from the surprise embrace, but quickly relax as he realized it was only you, returning the gesture as best as he could.

"Hey dear," He coos, drawing patterns into your arm after placing the cube down, "Good to see you better."

"It's good to see you again."

"Yeah? Did you miss me that much?"

"Obviously I would.."

Your hand came up to his hair, playing with the curly ends of them. He seemed to enjoy it, letting out a small hum. A comfortable silence falls over you two, only the quiet breathing of you and Gavril's filling the air.

"Do you...want to talk about last night?" He sounded hesitant when whispering out the question, he seemed unsure in what he was doing. You found it sweet of him that he wanted to make sure you were okay though.

You mulled over the question in your head, thinking it again and again. Do you want to talk about it? I mean, you cried your heart and soul out last night so it should be fine, right? But there's the chance that might make Gavril uncomfortable. He was asking, but there's the benefit of doubt.

"..Just a bad day was all."

"Mm..." He stays quiet for a few moments, thinking something over, "Who do I have to kill?" He attempts what you think is a joke, but you can't tell whether he is actually serious or just trying to cheer you up in some weird way. Eh, he's your weirdo anyway.

"Don't. I love you Gav, but I swear to God do not kill someone just because they made me sad," Pulling your face out of his hair, you lean down to plant a small kiss on his cheek, "unless I ask you too." A cheeky smile makes its way onto your face, jumping over the couch just to sit right beside him. Looking at his face, it seemed to be flushed, a slight look of embarrassment on his face as a wobbly smile takes place. His adorableness just seems to intensity whenever he's flustered, you don't know why but it just makes you fall harder for him.

"Did you eat anything?"

"I, uhm..no not really?"

"You ate everything in the fridge again, didn't you?" His gaze averted to the side as he lets out a nervous chuckle. Letting out a sigh of slight disappointment, you slump onto him, closing your eyes. "'s fine, I needed an excuse to go shopping anyway.." You can't blame him, to be honest. He must've been starving and food must've been scarce. You're surprised he isn't dead yet, or in jail.

"Is it alright if I come?" Thinking it over in your mind, you think of the pros and cons of him coming along.

"..Sure." He's probably going to tag along either way, no matter which answer you chose. But that's fine, you love your skrunckly little rat man either way.

You just hoped he wouldn't try and steal a wheel of cheese, again.

[zeephyre]

CRITICAL ROLE CAMPAIGN 3 EPISODE 85 SPOILERS

IM LITERALLY ABOUT TO LOSE MY MIND YALL

Where do I even ??? start ???

I haven't been posting c3 as the episodes dropped in...a while actually, like right before they went to the feywild. i have many thoughts and many feelings about so many things that have happened since then and I'll summarise them so I can get to THIS episode.

fearne and ashton - love their shard powers, they're literally royalty and terrifying, and i want them to make-out. i can't wait to see them go full primordial again in a real combat situation.

imogen - save her. literally save her. free her, even. i love everything about the call of ruidus when it comes to imogen on a narrative standpoint, but...God I get so worried that we're gonna lose her. I don't mean she's gonna betray the hells, but...ruidus could take her and then i would simply perish.

laudna - before i really get into wtf went down this episode with her and she who must not be named, i gotta say... im worried. very very worried. however, that fireball was objectively the best shit ever.

fcg - i can't even really remember anything stand out abt fcg except what Sam pulled last night so.

chetney - still the heart of the team, still my baby girl, still my favourite. love him to bits.

orym - i think laudna is going to beat his ass one of these days and im... even more concerned about that after this episode. his nana morri powers are cool as fuck tho... does that make him a warlock now? i know he isn't multi-classing but wouldn't that be cool

ANYWAY WE'RE ON THE FUCKING MOON AND WE GOT MOON LORE AND EVERYTHING WAS SHITTY THEN FUN THEN SHITTY THEN FUN AGAIN THEN REALLY FUCKING SAD THEN IT ALL WENT TO SHIT AGAIN.

the moment imogen reached out to ruidus and matt mentioned that she could sense where other ruidusborn were i fucking knew that otohan was high tailing it in their direction, and i thought they instinctively knew that too but they probably got so distracted.

we were travelling for hours and had a huge fight that almost got them captured (not to be confused with the OTHER two fights that almost got them captured) and I was begging and screaming and crying for them to get a long rest safely hidden away AND THEN THEY SPLIT THE PARTY WITH BARELY ANY SPELL SLOTS OR HIT POINTS AFTER BEING DRAINED FROM ANOTHER BATTLE WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM

(Sidenote, the willmaster really opened up the door to the further increase in moral pondering in a certain number of hellians. i do think using the harness is disgusting and hypocritical, but i don't condemn them for it, it just...makes me wanna vomit thinking abt what ludinus did with it. not to mention the HUNGER parallels between laudna and ludinus...its just not good yall. also??? objectively funny that fcg seemed weirded out by the idea of killing the willmaster, not just with the harness but in general, considering how many people they've killed up to this point)

idk if its just the inherent terror that an evil old hot lady can inspire that makes otohan so much more terrifying to me than ludinus. like, objectively, ludinus is a worse threat and could wipe them out EASILY but jesus otohan is like the damn reaper to me. it's the trauma from the laudna, fearne, orym massacre mixed with the underlying little drop from their uthodurn romp that let us know that resurrection spells are NOT working and idk if that got fixed bc of time passing or distance from the leylines but i really did not want to test that shit out in real time

thank...god that sam riegel is a damn genius player, that banishment of fcg and fearne was the ONLY reason fcg survived. and thank GOD FOR KEYLETH BECAUSE WITHOUT THAT CLOUD SPELL BELLS HELLS WOULD BE VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY DEAD RN.

God, "otohan has us. run." is going to haunt me just as much, if not more than the almost tpk. it just...shot me straight back to bassuras and the plan to run that just...immediately fell apart.

god fcg truly could have died there. and fearne would be captured. i know the hells would be too stupid and too brave and too loyal to leave fearne with otohan in their cloud form but can you imagine a world where fcg was gone, fearne was captured and the hells had to switch from recon to rescue... itd be stressful but pretty fun.

thankfully it didn't come to that and some good came from the shit.

ruidus is so beautiful. i was worried they'd end being trapped under ruidus while they explored (not that I wasn't on board with the detours, I wish this wasn't a time sensitive mission), but matt's imagery of the fossilized elven structure and garden made me sad but also happy that we got to see it.

i cannot believe that the stupid plan to shove fearne up a water hole happened AGAIN and it ended up with us FINDING A BACK HOLE TO RUIDUS GOD I LOVE THESE CHUCKLEFUCKS WHEN IS THE NEXT EPISODE MATT YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME. WHERE EVEN ARE THEY??? IS IT EVEN EXANDRIA???? WHAT DO WE DO IF IT IS EXANDRIA??? WHERE DID THIS HOLE EVEN COME FROM???? DOES IT CLOSE AND REOPEN??? IS IT STAGNANT?????? IS IT FUCKING STABLE?!?!?!?!?!

God...we could go back to keyleth and the others and actually invade ruidus without encountering the ruby vanguard. (that's if they're alright because otohan did go out onto the battlefield and we don't know what fhe fuck she did when the illusion fell through)

GOD. IS IT THURSDAY YET??? WE HAVENT EVEN FOUND THE RESISTANCE????

[dootznbootz]

I know we love our morally gray characters. But the internet kinda ruined Circe for me.

Let me explain.

I remember I actually used to really like Circe's character when I first read the Odyssey last year. I loved her as a "helpful antagonist type" character.

But what ruined her character for me was everybody calling her a "girlboss" or just simping for her in a way? But they completely disregard the fact she technically raped a man. (But no one cares about that because male SA victims never get taken seriously, especially in media smh)

Now, I can never experience Circe as the same character because all I see is a terrible person being glorified because of her gender. And then people say double standards don't exist!

Which I hate cause she's a genuinely cool character. (From a writing standpoint)

Circe isn't a bad character let me be clear (in the Odyssey anyway. Cough cough Madeline Mil-) But I just hate how people romanticize her completely ignoring her terrible actions. And to think it's all just because she's a "hot badass female".

And this isn't just about Odysseus either, there's literally a myth where she tries to seduce a man, but when he remains faithful she turns him into a woodpecker-

People can like her CHARACTER, however, they should still acknowledge her bad actions too and hold her accountable. If we can all agree it's shitty what Zeus did to a bunch of women, we can also agree what Circe did to Odysseus was shitty.

Women sexually assaulting men is just as inhumane as vice versa and we have to stop turning a blind eye about it, even if it's fictional.

And I feel like people WOULD actually hold her accountable if she was a male character. Which makes me even more angry.

Maybe this is just a me thing, but I just can't fawn over a character and call them hot when they've done something as bad as some of the things Circe has done.

So, I guess what you could get out of this-

Please stop romanticizing circe.

Hold her accountable as you would any other character.

Don't be so forgiving just because you find her attractive.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my Ted talk and sorry for ranting

honestly yeah, all of this.

I sadly had to block Circe's tag on tumblr because it pisses me off how much people glorify her and/shittalk Odysseus with it. (I trust my friends when they have Circe content lol)

I love Circe as well. She's such an interesting and fun character but how people twist her just fucks with me so much. Also to make HER a victim just for girlbossness? What's so girlboss about having such a horrific thing happen to you?

I said it in a different post but you can thirst for Circe without making fun of her victim. People will call a victim of rape a manwhore or a slut as if what happened to him was a grand ol time. It's genuinely disturbing. He is shown to have PTSD from it (in my opinion) in the Odyssey. This book is ancient and yet it captures that better than anything I've read.

Odysseus isn't necessarily a wholesome, "goody-to-shoes" man. He does a lot of awful things. That doesn't mean that the suffering he went through is suddenly negated.

Even bringing up stuff with female characters, the fact that people will water them down so then they're not "problematic" pisses me off. Women can be horrible, even good women. Penelope is my fave but she's pretty awful in many ways.

Evidence will be right in front of people and they won't care. Crying, begging to go, fear, avoidance, numbness, etc. There'll be excuses anyway. "He's a guy, he's fine with it." "Men are sex crazed, especially back then." "He didn't try hard enough." "He should be grateful."

Honestly? What saddens me the most is that I don't think people will ever really understand what happened or even WANT to because they have their own idea in their head and refuse to see it for what it is. I mean Hades game did it too. It's really sad.

Circe and him weren't fwb. They weren't lovers. What about "heart full of grim forebodings" screams love? He wanted to save his friends and go home.

[fandomworld9728]

To Breed a Fallen Angel - Chapter 2:

Lucifer was not having a good day. He woke up feeling crappy and drenched in sweat. When was the last time that happened? Not feeling like getting dressed, Lucifer stayed in his favorite duck pajamas before plopping himself down on one of the couches in the sitting area. Not feeling up for whatever breakfast Alastor had cooked for the residents of the hotel, he gave into his odd craving for Earth sweets. Snapping a tub of ice cream and a spoon into existence he started to shovel it into his mouth. 

Mississippi Mud. It was one of his go-to's on days like today. It didn't quite satisfy his craving for something sweet, but it was enough for now. It seemed that he wasn't the only one having a shitty day. His poor baby Charlie was short tempered and on edge. Every plan she wrote ended up in ash on the floor and her cork board was broken to pieces in her frustration. Her demonic form was openly on display showing just how uncontrolled her emotions currently were.

So much so that it was scaring Husk and Niffty. Vaggie on the other hand seemed to be going through the same thing as himself. Sensitive to the point of most things bringing them to tears, wanting things that comfort them. Like their pajamas and foods that aren't really good for your body, but good for boosting your mood. She had sat next to him on the couch huddled in a blanket and her hair pulled up.

Wordlessly, Lucifer made another spoon and offered it to her. That's how the two ended up eating ice cream and crying over movies. Oddly enough, when Alastor had stood in front of the TV to scold the two for wasting the food he spent that morning making, something stopped him and had him fussing over the smaller man. Something at the back of his had was screaming at him that this was wrong, that something was wrong, and he needed to leave.

But something that held a bigger influence over him at the moment was enjoying the attention. Liked how soft the deer demon was being with him and how much he wanted to please him. Especially when Lucifer had mentioned wanting something sweet from Earth but didn't know what, the Overlord eagerly insisted on making him something he learned from his mother back when he was alive. It made something inside Lucifer purr with delight.

"I can't believe she just... betrayed him like that! That bitch!"

"I know. So many years down the drain. I need to stop watching this. It reflects my life too much and it's making me depressed."

He could hear people talking but couldn't really focus on the words. Unless they were said to him it seemed that they sounded muddled. Almost like he was underwater. Were they important? I mean the two were talking about him, his baby, and his future daughter in law so he tried his best to focus on them.

"Don't tell me they scared smiles away."

"Nah. Surprisingly, he's in the kitchen making something sweet on Lucifer's request." Yes, he was. Alastor was being so good to Lucifer. Almost like a... dammit. What was wrong with his brain today? The word was on the tip of his forked tongue.

"What?"

"I have no clue. It's almost like a flip had switched. If I'm being honest... it's difficult for me to stay put. My self-preservation instincts are keeping me from going over there."

Does that mean he was going to have more people fussing over him? Why did he like that thought? He usually hated making people worry about him or take care of him. He couldn't deny the pleasant warmth that came with the thought, however.

"Alright. We gotta figure out what's going on- are those fluffy ears on his head?" 

Oh. There were ears on top of his head now that he thought about it. Not sure what type of ears, Lucifer twitched them to try and get a better idea of what his magic had added to his appearance. The range of motion, shape, size, and his new range and sensitivity of hearing led him to believe they were deer ears. Strange.

Lucifer didn't have a chance to think on it as Alastor, a buck, came in with a plate of something that smelt heavenly. He was a good, strong, buck who fusses over Lucifer and gives him good food. Who was deadly but had a soft touch.

"Here you are, my dear. Freshly made beignets. Enjoy."

Taking the plate, Lucifer popped one in his mouth and was pretty sure he moaned at the taste. These scratched that itch he had been feeling all morning. He was so absorbed in his new treat, that he almost missed the way Alastor and his ears stood up straighter at the noise, a proud smirked on his face as his chest was puffed out. 

"You like them."

"No. I love them."

"Love them enough to give me a reward?"

A reward? What could he even want? Why would he even want a reward when he looked so proud of himself? Before he could ask, Lucifer had his arms full of radio demon. His arms were around the fallen angel's waist and his face in his stomach. His ears flat against his head instead of on high alert. It was so cute! Lucifer could vaguely register gasps behind them but was too focused on the man in front of him.

He was tempted to reach out and feel how soft his hair and ears were. How sturdy and smooth his antlers were. Would he grow them if Lucifer asked? So many questions. So many possibilities. Where would he even begin? His thoughts came to a screeching halt when he felt the buck nuzzle into his stomach and try to nip at the skin, only to growl at the shirt that stopped him.

The alarm bells that had been going off in his head increased tenfold. Whatever fog had been impairing his thinking was starting to clear. Quickly.

"Sire. Little doe. You smell divine. Like a ripe fruit ready to be plucked." Dark eyes looked up at the king. Filled with a hunger that had excitement and panic shoot through Lucifer's body. "My little mate."

Oh. Oh fuck. 

The pieces all finally clicked into place. It's fucking mating season and he is leaking pheromones all over the place! No wonder Alastor was acting so strange! Wait...

Alastor had called him his mate. Could smell something when he had his face pressed to Lucifer's stomach. Oh, hell no! He was not about to let this creepy ass bastard have his way with him. Scrambling off the couch, Lucifer yelped as he ended up falling over the back of the couch. That fucker. He looked delighted at the idea of Lucifer running. Looked like he would leap over the couch to pin him down.

"Yeah. No. You stay the fuck over there! I'm going to Lust and while I'm gone you need to air this place out!" Running out the door to the limo they kept parked out front to take him to the elevators to take him to the Lust Ring, not trusting his magic at the moment, Lucifer almost froze in fear at the scream that he was sure shook the whole Pride Ring.

"L U C I F E R!"

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[livingbrother]

LO and it's portrayal of S/A

A rant by someone who just finished EP. 98 and is incredibly furious

Cw: Mentions of S/A, it's effects, too much swearing, ED mention, personal stuff that happened to yours truly, lots of other stuff too, just no idea what to tag it as

Don't read this if you're not mentally doing well, I don't want you getting hurt because of my post, I love you, feel better soon

Boy. Oh fucking boy. I just got through episode 98 of this shit show and, I'll just say, I am beyond furious. Livid, in fact.

For context, I am a survivor or sexual abuse and mental abuse, I have dealt with those who act sort of like Apollo, I was never raped, but I was molested as a child. I, as a survivor, feel nothing but rage at how Rachel portrayed Apollo being a rapist. The way he acts is incredibly unrealistic for an abuser, as somebody who dealt with two abusers with Narcissistic Personality Disorder (I'm not saying everyone who has NPD are villains, I'm just saying what I went through), I see what Rachel was trying, but oh so tragically failed, to do. He tried to control, manipulate, and gaslight Persephone. Only for none of it to work, that's not how ANY of it fucking works!

Where is the fucking control, other than just fucking raping her? I get he wants to take the power away from her and be the one to control her, but I've seen none of that! I get she has PTSD over it (I'LL GET TO THIS POINT AGAIN). I NEVER GOT THE SENSE THAT SHE WAS POWERLESS EXCEPT FOR THAT ONE SCENE. I HAVE NEVER SEEN HER QUESTION IF THAT WAS HIS INFLUENCE PICKING HER DRESSES, OR FUCKING EVEN HER FOOD! WHEN I WAS LIVING WITH ONE OF MY ABUSERS, SHE'D PICK OUT MY OUTFITS, ONE'S I HATED, AND I STILL CHOOSE SOME OF THOSE OUTFITS, TO THIS DAY! WHERE WAS HER LOSS OF CONTROL? SHE NEVER FELT ISOLATED, SHE NEVER FELT LIKE SHE WAS TRAPPED. YES. SHE WAS TRAPPED IN THAT ONE ROOM WITH HIM, BUT EVEN THEN! SHE HAD LEVERAGE OVER HIM WITH THE FUCKING LYRE. Ugh.

About her realizing she was raped, um. Excuse me? A lot of victims don't realize they were raped or abused until like, months or years later. I'm glad for the ones who instantly realized it, good for them. Given Persephone's personality and experience with the world, she wouldn't have known it was rape because she's not accustomed to dating and sexual culture. On top of that, she isn't really seen actually distressed when she remembers, oh, and lets not forget that she WAS FUCKING FINE WITH TOUCH AND PHYSICAL FLIRTING DAYS AFTER HER ASSAULT. Let me remind you that I have been through this thing myself, you do not just omg I was just assaulted! time to go let someone touch me! Nonono, you spend years jumping when people touch you, years of moving when someone tries to grab your shoulder, years of pushing someone's hand off your arm, years screaming when you get a hug. And then, maybe from flashbacks, maybe from googling things, you discover you were molested! And then it alllllll makes sense. I understand if she became hypersexual, cause same, but that usually doesn't set in until a good long while.

I also hate how Apollo is written, he should have stayed as a shitty ex boyfriend or whatever the fuck Rachel was gonna make him, he just comes across as a cartoonish villain than an abuser. The man just fucking rubs his hands together and fucking goes I'll get you next time my pretty! I fucking HATE his writing so goddamn much. I understand wanting to make him pushy, egotistical, and insecure, they're some of the hallmarks of the pushy nice guy she was going for. But when it comes to him being abusive, it's like watching a bad joke. Rapists don't usually, you know, CATCH FEELINGS FOR THEIR VICTIM (correct me if I'm wrong), unless it's to lure them back in to hurt them again. She made him so obviously evil it hurts, abusers don't usually act that way, they put on a pretty smile, act kind, and behind closed doors, act shitty. I respect 97-98 for getting that part right, but too many times, too many fucking times Rachel has gotten that wrong. I have dealt with this myself, my mother did this exact thing, she even put on the pretty smile for me so even I, somebody who knew he was being tormented, questioned whether or not I was being abused! We never see this with Persephone! We never see her getting gaslit with this, she never questions her reality! She knows everything that's going on for sure! I know what Rachel was aiming for, and she failed miserably!

God, on top of this, we never really get to see Persephone's PTSD unless the story fuckin says Apollo's here! She's never really fucking affected by her rape, we don't see her jump from touches, refuse sexual advanced from Hades, yeah, sure, we see her afraid of camera flashes, but that's about it!!!!!!!! She never really experiences the effects of s/a! I developed an ED and agoraphobia from my abuse! Where the fuck is that?! That would have been a lot more fucking interesting than the slop we fucking got!

I know I've missed some things, but I need to calm down before I pop a blood vessel. I might revisit this post when I'm less angry, I just needed to rant.