#lol my cat could tell that I was upset and came to snuggle.

[dootznbootz]

I know we love our morally gray characters. But the internet kinda ruined Circe for me.

Let me explain.

I remember I actually used to really like Circe's character when I first read the Odyssey last year. I loved her as a "helpful antagonist type" character.

But what ruined her character for me was everybody calling her a "girlboss" or just simping for her in a way? But they completely disregard the fact she technically raped a man. (But no one cares about that because male SA victims never get taken seriously, especially in media smh)

Now, I can never experience Circe as the same character because all I see is a terrible person being glorified because of her gender. And then people say double standards don't exist!

Which I hate cause she's a genuinely cool character. (From a writing standpoint)

Circe isn't a bad character let me be clear (in the Odyssey anyway. Cough cough Madeline Mil-) But I just hate how people romanticize her completely ignoring her terrible actions. And to think it's all just because she's a "hot badass female".

And this isn't just about Odysseus either, there's literally a myth where she tries to seduce a man, but when he remains faithful she turns him into a woodpecker-

People can like her CHARACTER, however, they should still acknowledge her bad actions too and hold her accountable. If we can all agree it's shitty what Zeus did to a bunch of women, we can also agree what Circe did to Odysseus was shitty.

Women sexually assaulting men is just as inhumane as vice versa and we have to stop turning a blind eye about it, even if it's fictional.

And I feel like people WOULD actually hold her accountable if she was a male character. Which makes me even more angry.

Maybe this is just a me thing, but I just can't fawn over a character and call them hot when they've done something as bad as some of the things Circe has done.

So, I guess what you could get out of this-

Please stop romanticizing circe.

Hold her accountable as you would any other character.

Don't be so forgiving just because you find her attractive.

Anyways, thank you for coming to my Ted talk and sorry for ranting

honestly yeah, all of this.

I sadly had to block Circe's tag on tumblr because it pisses me off how much people glorify her and/shittalk Odysseus with it. (I trust my friends when they have Circe content lol)

I love Circe as well. She's such an interesting and fun character but how people twist her just fucks with me so much. Also to make HER a victim just for girlbossness? What's so girlboss about having such a horrific thing happen to you?

I said it in a different post but you can thirst for Circe without making fun of her victim. People will call a victim of rape a manwhore or a slut as if what happened to him was a grand ol time. It's genuinely disturbing. He is shown to have PTSD from it (in my opinion) in the Odyssey. This book is ancient and yet it captures that better than anything I've read.

Odysseus isn't necessarily a wholesome, "goody-to-shoes" man. He does a lot of awful things. That doesn't mean that the suffering he went through is suddenly negated.

Even bringing up stuff with female characters, the fact that people will water them down so then they're not "problematic" pisses me off. Women can be horrible, even good women. Penelope is my fave but she's pretty awful in many ways.

Evidence will be right in front of people and they won't care. Crying, begging to go, fear, avoidance, numbness, etc. There'll be excuses anyway. "He's a guy, he's fine with it." "Men are sex crazed, especially back then." "He didn't try hard enough." "He should be grateful."

Honestly? What saddens me the most is that I don't think people will ever really understand what happened or even WANT to because they have their own idea in their head and refuse to see it for what it is. I mean Hades game did it too. It's really sad.

Circe and him weren't fwb. They weren't lovers. What about "heart full of grim forebodings" screams love? He wanted to save his friends and go home.

[a-lumos-in-the-nox]

OT3 Dynamics

The superlatives from Between the Shadows these are funny lol

"I have a sword"- This is Juni

"I have a magic staff"- This is Druig

"I steal shit"- This is Makkari

"Yes those are idiots but they're my idiots"- All of them at different points in time

Supernatural Creatures- Juni & Makkari.

The Human who's intimidated by it but into it- Druig

Believer of ghosts- Druig

"skeptic"- Makkari

Ghost- Juni

two bitter enemies and- Juni & Druig

someone popcorn enjoying the show- Makkari

dumbass-Makkari

smartass- Druig

just vibing- Juni

viciously protective/viciously protective/viciously protective- ALL OF THEM

soft but could kick ass- Juni & Makkari

could kick ass but is really soft/makes jokes-Druig

------------------------

More OTP Questions

TW: angst, suggestive content, etc.

Who would end a heated argument by defending their actions with ‘because I love you!’ ?

Juni would do this.

What would they do if the other woke in a manic state after a nightmare?

Druig, Makkari and Juni would try to comfort the other one the best they could. Usually by hugs and rocking back and forth.

Do they wear the other’s clothes? (sweatshirt, bandana, necklace, etc.)

No they don't.

Which one is more protective? Who needs to be ‘protected’?

They are all protective of each other even if they could kick ass all by themselves.

Describe their cozy night in.

Snuggle Pile with the least amount of clothes on possible. Maybe music playing in the bg depends on how their feeling.

Who would beg the other not to leave? Who has to leave to protect the other?

Druig would beg the other two not to leave. Juni has had to leave to protect the other and Makkari follows.

Would they build a pillow fort together just because?

Juni would build one with Makkari, but Druig would not.

What happens if one of them gets sick?

They can't get sick their immortal flawless beings.

What are their thoughts on having children?

Cant have them.

Describe their first date. they were all at night either under the stars walking together or talking under the stars again.

Do either try to hide their emotions if upset? Can the other still tell?

Juni does till they boil over. Kari & Druig can tell.

Do they have many heated arguments? How do they smooth things over?

They had 1 really heated argument. Juni cooled off after a couple years and figured out her feelings on it and went to smooth things back over. Druig told on himself and let whoever wanted to leave, leave. And told continuous generations and generations of kids about his two partners. Teaching the people he looked after not to be scared of Juni and how to talk like Makkari. When they came to reconcile they found out and things mended.

Who’s the bigger tease?

It's split between Juni & Makkari. They tease Druig A LOT, but also each other.

How do their personalities compliment each other? How do they clash?

Juni will go along with basically anything Makkari does she just wants to tag along for safety reasons. They clash on planning things. Druig & Makkari have showed up to Juni's place of residence not on the right days their supposed to be there making it very awkward for Juni to handle with both of her partners in her apartment BY THEMSELVES. It's like herding cats.

Do they always say 'i love you' before leaving? no, Juni leaves tiny notes in places with hearts or 'i love yous' where Druig & Kari can find them while she's away.

Can they stay up all night just talking? yes, Juni & Druig can. Makkari has fallen asleep on one of them while they are talking.

Who's more likely to pull the other in by the waist and kiss them passionately? Makkari will pull the other two in to kiss them.

How likely are they to have fur babies? How many and what kind?

no pets, they are globetrotters. Therefore can't take care of the animals if they were to keep some

How do they feel about PDA? Druig & Juni are the culprits of PDA.10000000%

Choose one song that perfectly describes their relationship.

Love Someone- Jason Mraz

Who would get into a fight to defend the other's honor? Who tends to the other's wounds?

Druig defend the other two; Kari & Juni would drag him back and tend to wounds.

What reminds each of their partner?

Any piece in a museam, or replica of a painting, the color red reminds Juni of Makkari.

Golden sunsets, the color blue or mixed bowls of fruit reminded Juni of Druig.

Tap shoes, floral patterns and tea tree spearmint remind Makkari of Juni.

The moon, dancing and apples reminds Druig of Juni.

Who's more likely to convince the other to stay in bed come morning? Juni she dose not like getting out of bed. And will make the others stay with her.

Who's more likely to give the other a massage? Makkari's good at massages

Do they have any hobbies they share? Makkari will sing along with Juni when she brings tapes for them to listen too. Treasure Hunting isnt really a hobby Juni & Makkari share precisely but its fun.

What are their vices? Stealing shit. Juni learned from Makkari & Juni steals stuff as a shadow.

What are there thoughts on pet names? Do they have any?

Yes they have Petnames. Druig is Dru, love. Juni is JuneBug, Sunshine, my love, Baby. Makkari is Kari, my love, Baby.

Who is more likely to jump in an elevator? Who freaks out? All of them jumping in the elevator.

Your OTP gets to pick out each other's outfits; what is each wearing? they'd all switch chlothes. Juni would make Druig wear one of her dresses for shits and giggles.

Can they sit side by side without touching the other or are they handsy? (lacing fingers, touching knees, etc.) Handsy no they cant

Who's the better story teller? Druig

Who's the better cook? Juni

Who's more likely to tell a dirty joke or story to make the other blush? Makkari

Who's more artistic? in what way? Juni, she can make up fun things to do on the spot. shes a creative genius. makeing up dances is her speacilty.

Who's more likely to fire up the stove at 2am because the other woke up in the middle of the night hungry? Juni, she cooks for Makkari. Druig sleeps like a rock so he's not getting up unless he's jumped on.

Which is more likely to swear? Juni & Druig

Who is more sexually experimental? Who's more vanilla? BAHAHA what vanilla?! Juni is shy in the beginning but becomes more comfortable because of her partners & freaky shit happends....

Who has an insatiable appetite? And what does the other do to help? Makkari. Juni will make massive meal for her when she comes over. or order the biggest pizza she can find

Which one would take their jacket it off and drape over the other one because they were visibly shivering? forget the jacket it's instant let me smother you with my body heat till your warm. Makkari has tried to zip her and Juni in one jacket before.

What's their favorite type of weather to enjoy together? (getting snowed in together, watching thunderstorms, etc.) laying in the moonlight on summer nights together

Who would give their life for the other without a second thought? All

Who would dance in the kitchen making dinner? Would the other join in or watch from the doorway? Juni would dance since she's the dancer! Makkari would join in and Druig would watch from the door.

Can they fall asleep without the other? Yes, they've all had to live separately for centuries so yes they can.

Would they get frisky at the movies by themselves? Yes

Does either of them have a secret that could potentially ruin their relationship? no

Who's the better driver? Juni

Does either of them have a hard time being away from the other? not really, two of them could just visit the others in the blink of an eye so. not really.

who's more likely to do something out of spite? Druig

What’s a non verbal way they say I love you? Touching hands & heads against the others chest or on their heart.

Describe their weekend getaway? visiting either Druig or Juni. And shenanigans occur.

Would they ever go skinny dipping? They have...multiple times

Who’s more likely to carry the other to bed?

Druig & Makkari have both carried Juni to bed. Druig has carried Makkari to bed.

Do they like watching clouds or star gazing?

star gazing since Juni.

What do they do turn the other on/put them in the mood? Touch a spot or move a certain way.

For Druig- move a certain way & make him watch

For Makkari- Touch a certain spot

For Juni-Touch a certain spot

Whose the serious one when grocery shopping and who likes to toss random things in the cart?

if they did this. Makkari would put random things in the cart. Juni is the serious one, sometimes Druig is too.

Who’s more likely to hold a grudge after an argument?

Juni

Who tops? Who bottoms?

Thye are all switches

Who pulls the other closer when they’re sleeping?

Druig or Makkari will pull Juni closer cause once Juni is asleep she's out like a rock

Tag: @redheadspark

[friggsdc]

Title: little delinquent pt i

part i | part ii 

Warnings: Female!reader (bat!sis), mostly family fluff, AU, hurt/comfort

word count: 3000~

It had Bruce and Dick sharing a look for a moment before the latter spoke up, “It’s not like I’m against continuing to expand the family, but…” he eyed the child you held nervously, “please don’t start bringing home every child you find…” he tilted his head, “he’s bad enough.” Bruce settled a light glare at his first son (that definitely wasn’t what Bruce was thinking), though Dick was stilled by the way your eyes narrowed at him instead.

“His name is Terrence,” that was all you said, brushing past as they were suddenly on guard at the inherited Wayne-scowl on your face.

a/n: Terry as a baby tho with an overly protective big sis/mom reader… I can’t get this out of my head lol. Also batfam are very close with bat!sis reader in this, so lotsa fluffy sibling intimacy. Because I want the fluff haha.

(it actually turned into more plot than fluff sighs)

 idk pairings/haven’t thought of that, I just didn’t know how to tag it so i used pairing tags??? lol despite that, I don’t feel comfortable putting Damian, Bruce, nor Terry in the tags ee;;;; Jason’s not in this chapter but he’s in the tags anyway sighs, he comes in around ch3.

-

A light lit up on one of the many monitors in the cave, a box popping up not a moment later with the alert, attracting the costumed people in the room. Bruce was second to the computers, Tim immediately making certain that the alert said what he thought it said, “Good. She’s back.” He sighed heavily, relieved before trudging towards the car port. Sure he was upset, they all were, but at the moment they were just glad their sister was back and alive. She’d get quite the talking to about scaring them all like this, especially from Tim and Bruce, later.

It almost felt like an eternity as her bike came into view, skidding to a comfortable stop with minimal sound. She took a moment to adjust herself, and they didn’t miss the small form clinging to her frontside. It was aggravating how slow and careful she was being, how slowly she got up from her bike as if the young child she had with her was the most fragile treasure. She shifted so that the bundle was curled up in her arms, messy black hair hiding most features as their face buried in her shoulder, frightened. The kid had to be about a year old or so, they assumed, quiet and trembling in her hold.

Damian stood next to their father, annoyance on his face as he bit back harsh words. Of all the people in the world, like Alfred, his sister was someone he never wanted to hurt. He couldn’t even imagine such a thing. “You turned off your comms,” Bruce stated, she only nodded, not usually one for hiding what she was up to. He went to open his mouth again, but Damian’s cold tone beat him to it, “you were missing all night.” She nodded at him again, lips pursed to keep herself from saying anything.

She was struggling with her feelings right now, incredibly upset at the way her family was staring at her, as if she herself were a child. It was really hard for her right now to be the loving big sister she’s always been since coming to live at the manor. All she wanted to do was forgive them for their mistrust, or to tell them everything to take that distrust away. She hated feeling like a bad guy, and she did her best to stand firm on how she felt, but her resolve was crumbling fast in their presence.

You couldn’t help it, your family had that kind of effect on you, always weak to them and their needs.

You would always forgive them. Always.

Tim was first to rush over, quickly pulling you into a hug (careful of the boy), and a slight tremble in his tensed hands kept you from pulling back. He rested his head on the shoulder opposite the kid’s head, arms refusing to move as the other three strode over. “Stupid, where were you?” Tim mumbled into your shoulder, your response was to bury your cheek in his hair, “I was… we were so worried. You don’t just go dark on us like that, especially not on me, you know that.”

He shifted his head to look you in the face, foreheads pressing together. Reaching up, he gently took off your domino mask so your eyes could meet, him doing his best to stare you down. A silent conversation began, your somewhat desperate look of, ‘I’m sorry, I have my reasons,’ and his shoulders sagging a little, ‘I’m still not happy about this.’

It had Bruce and Dick sharing a look for a moment, the latter speaking up, “It’s not like I’m against continuing to expand the family, but…” he eyed the child you held nervously, “please don’t start bringing home every child you find…” Dick tilted his head, “he’s bad enough.” Bruce settled a light glare at his first son (that definitely wasn’t what Bruce was thinking), though Dick was stilled by the way your eyes narrowed at him instead.

“His name is Terrence,” that was all you said, brushing past as they were suddenly on guard at the inherited Wayne-scowl on your face.

“Hey, uhm…” Dick coughed nervously now, stomach flipping and looked between Tim and Bruce, “has she… ever made a face like that before?” Tim frowned, shaking his head, “you actually upset her. That’s an accomplishment, Richard.” Tim went to change so he could follow you, wanting to know everything about what you had been doing and where you had been. “I… meant it to be humorous…” Damian just scowled at him, “it was in poor taste, Grayson,” he turned, wanting to change before following you and Tim, curious. Dick just sighed into his hand, knowing he’d have to make it up to you later, or the others would hold it against him.

“Babybat, too? Ugh.”

Usually you handled his joking around without much issue, what the heck?

“Good job. Whelmed yet?,” Bruce turned back towards the bat computer, intent on discovering things himself (and to alert the others, still out looking, that you were safe). After all, there was only going to be so much you’d say (call it a father’s intuition). Dick frowned at his father making fun of him, unamused, “...haha” He grumbled and went to change, following after his siblings with a yawn finding it’s escape (they’d been frantic all night, looking everywhere).

-

“You understand we’re not letting you out of our sight after this, right?” his ears perked up at Damian’s tone, uncertain if he was joking or not. Rounding the corner into a smaller sitting room, he stopped before leaning broad shoulders against the doorframe. “That’s terrifying, Dami.” Dick grinned at the glare his youngest brother sent him, eyes turning to you and the child on your lap apologetically, “Sorry, about before.”

You only waved your hand as if to dismiss the earlier conversation, a sign that Dick took to push off the wall and walk over for a better view, “So, Terrence, huh?” You only nodded, stuck in your thoughts, thinking things over. All your attention was kept on the child snuggled up against you, staring at the other’s in the room with a mixture of curiosity and fear.

Dick’s brow raised now that he got a good look.

“Okay, I know I said I was sorry, but…” Damian’s fingers strained to not curl into a fist as he gave Dick a hard, pointed stare, but he didn’t go farther as your hand patted his arm. “Black hair and blue eyes,” Tim sighed at Dick, “I’m just saying.” He shrugged, stopping himself from wondering aloud if the family was cursed.

You could only huff in exasperation as you buried your face in Terrence’s hair, the child wiggling to look up with huge blues. You smiled down at him and leaned back into the cushions, letting him rest against you at an incline, bouncing your leg lightly. His small hands readjusted to grasp onto your shirt, head using your chest as a pillow while he kept watching the men and scrunched his nose.

“So, where’d he come from?” Dick sat across form you, seeing as Damian was sitting next to you on the small couch, Tim in the chair to your other side (all your recon gear was in a pile on the floor next to you). A frown settled on your face, staring at the floor as you kept your face buried in the child’s hair, then shook your head. Stubborn. Tim frowned at you and the child, arms crossed in contemplation, and Damian was staring at the child wide-eyed in amazement (he was so inexperienced). Dick crossed his arms and leaned back, biting the inside of his cheek, “…hey,” your attitude was worrying him, you’d never been this closed off before.

Your eyes shifted from the floor to look at Dick, cycling to Damian and then to Tim, straight faced with having made your decision (even though you had already made it hours earlier). Looking to your family, you took a deep breath to brace yourself, “he’s mine.” All three of the men stiffened, Damian shaking his head, “you weren’t pregnant. Impossible.�� 

When your eyes met his, he squinted slightly, your head tilting forwards, his turning away, “tt.” Dick was a bit jealous at how you had such a strong connection with Tim and Damian, wishing he could join in on the exchange of expressions (unfortunately, his innate big brother intuition with his siblings only took him so far. Living in Blüdhaven meant he wasn’t as involved in family as he wanted).

Tim was being incredibly careful as he sized you up, taking in the kid’s appearance and the way you were keeping your eyes on the men like a hawk. Damian had relaxed next to you, shifting his weight to lean against your side as he began poking and prodding at the child. In turn, Terrence just tried to grab at Damian’s fingers with his small hands, at times trying to bite him when his finger booped him on the nose (Damian noticed and started turning it into a game, as if he were playing chicken with a cat and it’s claws).

Terrence became a bit more comfortable, too focused on Damian’s antics, and he let out a small laugh, causing Damian to freeze in place. He hadn’t expected it, too absorbed in the game he had made up and instantly his ears turned red, suddenly self-conscious. The finger that had been frozen in place was hovering dangerously close to Terrence’s face and, taking the invitation, the child bit down. He would have yelped if he hadn’t been so well trained, barely able to contain himself, Damian jerked his finger out of the child’s biting range.

Dick cracked a smile and you did your best to not laugh, Tim however was studying his youngest brother, it was cute when he acted his age.

“So, he’ll be staying here then?” You nodded at Dick, “think B��s gonna be okay with this?” you shrugged, it wouldn’t matter, you’d refuse to give the kid up, “So…” Dick shifted, failing to keep his face straight, “Damian’s not the baby anymore.” As wary of the kid as he was, he couldn’t pass up the moment to tease his favorite brother.

“…Grayson,” Damian glared at Dick before reluctantly looking at the kid, silently agreeing. He wasn’t the baby anymore, “we… will need to outfit a nursery room, then.” Dick couldn’t hide his smile, letting it spread on his face at his younger brother’s quick acceptance, “guess I’m gonna hafta visit more often then if I want to be the best uncle.” Both Tim and Damian’s heads turned in unison at Dick, eyes narrowing in a way that made Dick want to step back, nervous.

“No way, I’ll be--” Tim was cut off,

“As if you could be better than me, Grayson,” he sent a pointed look at Tim, “I will be the best uncle.”

You were just glad your brothers were taking this so well.

“Sure.” Tim deflated a bit as Bruce walked into the room, looking at his boys before turning to you and the child, “If you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to speak with—” Just like Tim, he was cut off, “I won’t tell you anything about him.” Bruce frowned at your stubbornness, not liking that this was how you chose to respond to the situation. “You’re not getting out of this, we’re going to have a talk,” he stopped himself, correcting his remark after a moment’s thought, “…a few talks, actually.”

“No.” you frowned and he crossed his arms with a more serious ‘I’m your father, do as I say,” look about him. “It’s not up for debate.”

The brothers just looked back and forth, opting to stay quiet instead of getting involved. It did no good when the two of you got stubborn with one another.

“You can’t take him from me.” Your father’s stare softened slightly, shaking his head, “we need to discuss that, too.” Honestly, he wasn’t as interested in whether or not you kept the child, the problem was how quiet you were being about him. Something wasn’t right about the situation, and his preliminary searches came up with nothing. 

He only had a first name, it wasn’t much to go on.

Terrence was staring at Bruce, one of his chubby little hands left your top to shove his thumb in his mouth. The unwavering stare the kid was giving him… if he didn’t know any better, Bruce would think he was being challenged. It took all of Bruce’s will power not to look down at Terrence, he wasn’t great with children, let alone an infant. He was broken from his thoughts of whether or not the kid actually was challenging him, or if he just had no clue about what to do in this situation (he didn’t want to admit it though) when you finally replied.

“You won’t find out where I was.” It was a statement.

He studied and trained hard to make hiding from anyone and anything look natural, you seemed to have been born with the (suddenly annoying) skill.

“Your thoroughness is worrisome.” He sighed, feeling this was going to be a bit… difficult.

The siblings all shared an amused laugh before Dick got back to his feet, another yawn escaping, “I’ll be in my old room, need some post-mission Z’s.” He felt like a zombie walking out of the room, hoping he’d beat the sun before it got too high. “See you and the kid in the… morning…?” He had almost no interest in trying to make his brain work, already resigned to bed. 

“Then, you as well.” Bruce nodded to Damian and with a sigh, he stood up, “alright, father. Good night,” before Damian could leave the room, you were suddenly standing by his side. “Rest sounds good right now,” you avoided Bruce’s disappointed look, watching as Tim rocked forward from the chair to his feet before stretching.

Giving out a small hum, you quickly retreated into the hall with Damian, waiting for neither Tim or Bruce (mainly Bruce). As you left, Bruce turned to Tim, questioning what was going on, “Sorry, but…” he started, “I have no clue about this one…” Tim scratched the back of his head, staring at the floor sheepishly. He felt at a loss, not having been given the silent treatment by you since you were kids.

You were literally in each other’s business all the damned time.

-

Damian walked comfortably next to you, eyes drooping (even though he’d never admit it), and you dropped him off at his bedroom door.

“Night, Dami.”

“Good night,” you gave him a small hug, ruffling his hair as his ears flushed for the second time that night. “You’re lucky I’m going to sleep…” he huffed, hair now a complete mess. He entered his room, leaving you alone to the halls, “I think a quick shower would be nice…” you were walking towards your room now, intent on getting comfortable and relaxing before getting some shut eye. Dick was right, it was an exhausting night.

Hand on the door of your room, staring at the child struggling to stay awake in your arms, you shook your head.

It was worth it.

And you’d do it again. Every time.

-

Tim entered the room hesitantly, no knocking, he was certain you wouldn’t answer, anyway, but he checked to see if it was okay before closing the door behind him. Looking around to gather his bearings, as you had the light off, curtains drawn, and it was nominally darker than the halls, he spotted the top of your head over the edge of the bed. Quickly, quietly, he crept over to stand a few feet from you, but your eyes stayed on the sleeping child in your lap, refusing to look up.

He settled himself closely next to you, sliding down to sit on the floor and leaning against the side of the bed, shoulder rubbing your own. He looked to the child in your lap as well, then gave a small hum before lightly nudging you.  

He wasn’t able to see well, but after adjusting to the lack of light, it became easier to understand his surroundings. It became easier to see your features, to see the kid in your arms, and it was easier to grasp the way you frowned in anticipation when turning to look him in the face.

He wasn’t certain why, but he braced for something, suddenly uneasy.

Your lips moved to form the word, no sound coming out, too terrified the walls would listen in, ‘Cadmus.’

Tim’s eyes widened in panic, the child’s big blues flashing in his mind, and it suddenly felt like everything was coming together. It was the one piece of useful information he was missing, the one piece that you made certain they wouldn’t be able to follow when you disappeared for the night. He looked to the sleeping child in your arms, then back up at you, brain going into overload. How...?

He understood now.

His hand found yours, squeezing tightly, reassuringly.

You slumped against his side, relieved.

He understood.

[oftenderweapons]

Hold Me Close — Jimin

Pairing: Jimin x reader (nicknamed Princess)

Wordcount: 1.1 k

Genre: fluff, dating!AU, idol!AU

Rating: GP (general public)

Hello, my daisies! I had to take a small pause (who would think I can only write a limited amount of fluff before I burn out LOL).

We’re back with the bedtime stories. Tonight I offer you sweet, very tired Jiminie trying to get special extra cuddles from Princess. Of course, it is a chance to unwind in a very loving, soft atmosphere. 

Voting is open again! Check out the link in my bio!!!

If you want more fics like these, check out the event’s Masterlist over here!

And here’s the kinky masterlist for the spicy folks 🥴😉

Enjoy 💜✨

Jimin crawled on the bed, straddling your legs and sliding up, dragging his face further on, against the comforter, underneath the magazine you were currently holding in your hands as you read a bit before falling asleep.

His head nuzzled higher up, reaching your navel, his hand slapping at your wrist, trying to invite you to pat his head and comb his golden locks. For good measure, he whined cutely, still trying to get your attention. 

As soon as you finished reading the sentence, you moved the magazine to the side, giving in to his bratty, silent request with a dismissive attitude. 

He could be so brash and demanding, especially in terms of affection. He was really a cat, claiming your attention whenever he wanted and acting distant whenever he needed to be by himself. Or whenever he felt like acting petty because you didn’t pay attention to him. 

While you went on reading with the corner of your eye, you heard him purr against your stomach before he planted his chin on your sternum and stared at you with alarming attention. 

“What is it, my duckling?” You asked, looking at his pout, his behaviour suggesting that he was in a playful, childlike mood. 

“Could you take me into consideration, please?” He asked, his lovely fingers linking together and resting under his face. 

“I am, Jiminie.” You corrected him, fixing the short bangs on his forehead. 

He pouted and huffed out, cocking his head to the side before pinching you. 

“What!?” You exclaimed, confused, slightly irritated, but only as a joke. 

He went full puppy eyes mode on you, making butterflies flutter in your stomach. “Princess…” He whined sweetly, trying to get all of your attention. 

You closed the magazine and put it down. You’d rather appease him than deal with an upset Jimin, especially because he had been acting strange all night — not sad, not horny, not angry, not tired, but certainly something. Your instinct had been on full alert since he’d come home. 

You held his head in your arms. “What is it, baby?” 

He snuggled up. “I’m in a mood.” He said through a pout, acting so cute you wanted to bite his pretty cheeks. 

“It’s okay, love. Thank you for telling me, duckling.” You praised him, feeling him giggle in reply while you stroked his back, testing the tight knots in his muscles. 

He outright moaned. 

“How would you like us to handle this?” You asked, making a careful work of phrasing the sentence correctly, choosing to address that as a shared matter rather that something you alone or him alone needed to face. 

He looked at you with a light glimmer in his eyes — not mischief, but true gratitude. 

“I was wondering… You know, uhm… Aftercare, right?”

You chuckled. “Yes, love.”

“I was wondering if we can do just… Aftercare. Without the rest — just that.” He mumbled quietly. 

You combed his hair off his eyes. You loved his blonde hair. He looked three times prettier than ever. Your and his eyes met with that sober, mature intimacy that had become a silent agreement between the two of you. You would bet an arm and a leg on it, on the sacred secret it represented, on the devotion that no teasing, no flirting would ever undermine. 

You were his safe place, his balance, his haven and his anchor. You were his home. He knew it and you felt it. 

“Of course we can, my duckling.” You said, cupping his face and trying to join your mouths in a meaningful small kiss. “Have you already washed your face, love?”

You fed him pet name after pet name, knowing how much those relaxed him and bolstered his confidence, especially when it was going through a rough moment. 

“I have. We can start from the tonic.” He said, his hands searching for yours, bringing them on his crown , pushing them to card his hair. 

You obliged immediately, especially after you noticed how much he as struggling to lead you through the motion. 

“Do you want me to grab the basket?” You asked, using your thumbs to feel the tendons of his nape. 

“I’ll go.” He groaned theatrically as he rolled on his back and stood up clumsily. He looked head to toe adorable. 

He came back lightning fast, a ridiculously expensive, fluffy headband in place and a small white basket in his hands. 

“Lay down, duckling,” you told him gently, leaving him some space under the soft covers you had warmed. 

He tucked himself in, the comforter hiding everything from his armpits down, his arms resting out of the blankets so that when you straddled him and started your work, he could easily reach for your behind, rubbing your ass and thighs. 

“Which tonic do you want?” You asked, fixing your position. 

“Rosehip.” He muttered letting his face relax as much as possible. 

You grabbed the small bottle, spraying to concoction over his face, recapping the bottle and placing it down as you waited for his face to absorb the liquid. 

“What happened today?” You asked rubbing your thumbs from his sternum up, along his collarbones. You had read it helps relax. 

“The usual. They added stuff to our already packed schedule. Added work outs. Added rehearsals. Added filming. Photoshoots. Anything imaginable.” He said, his voice neutral and tired. The fact that he didn’t whine or act bratty about it told you how worried he was. 

Tiger grass essence next. You let a few drops fall on his forehead. His cheeks. His chin. You pressed the edge of the glass pipette against the tip of his nose, making him curl it endearingly. 

“Will we manage to spend at least twenty minutes together for Valentine’s?” You asked, setting the ampoule back in the basket before using your hands to spread the slightly sticky liquid over his skin. 

“Dunno.” He spoke through a pout as you squeezed his cheeks together, giving small pats to his soft skin as you made the essence disappear. “Can I have the pineapple mask, please?”

You smiled and opened it, laying it on his skin evenly. You always kept that in stock, knowing it was his favourite. 

It always made you want to lick his face since it smelled so sweet. 

“It’s okay. I’ll take you away as soon as I can.” You said, adjusting it around his lips before bending down and pressing a butterfly kiss there. “I’ll steal you all to myself.”

“Please,” he spoke through straight lips, way too plump to fit in the outline of the mask. Just as your thumbs dug in the round muscles of his shoulders, his hands — more paws-like in the movement — found your backside, starting their usual kneading motion. 

“I’ll steal you and take you away. I’ll kidnap you. Keep you well fed all day.” You murmured, closing your eyes as you basked in your domestic bliss. “We’ll have a delayed Valentine’s. Which is twice as good because I’ll have you feral with yearning.” You grinned.

His fingers pinched you powerfully, making you flinch — just a little.

“You’re a little demon.” You replied with a joyful lilt in your voice. “I love you.”

“I’m adorable, I know.” He said, confidence completely restored thanks to your devoted care. 

With his eyes closed, he didn’t see your gaze became serious and fond, “Yes, you are.”

[deliciously-yeeted]

I was in desperate need of some beel fluff, so i wrote some. As one does. Uh, ive never done this,(posting fanfic, i normally jus write small things for myself tbh😅) before so please have mercy lol

I hope ya like it though, it put a smile on my face so im hoping it does the same for you♡

____________________________

You started filling the hem of your shirt with snacks, as many as you could fit in the scrunched up fabric that is, a tired but playful grin on your lips, as you thought over what you planned to do, mentally prepping yourself.

Normally, you're not so bold about seeking out comfort and such, feeling shy about showing vulnerability...but today, ugh, today had you particularly worn down. You needed something, affection preferably. You'd settle for a warm bath and some melatonin if you had to. Though, you really didnt want too.

You were tired of self soothing all the time. And Asmos care packages could only help so much. But you knew how to make it all magically better. There was only one option in times like these .

You worked quickly, excitement bouncing around in your gut, making your hands a little shaky.

Having grabbed all you could you carry, you practically dashed from the kitchen. Your mind set on finding a certain big demon. Last you heard, he was headed to his room for a bit. You hoped he was still there.

When you finally reached his bedroom door, you found yourself in a tad bit of a pickle. Your eyebrows furrowed, the realization that you wouldn't be able to open the door making you frown at the closed door briefly. You cursed yourself slightly, for not thinking that far ahead. You forgot in all your excitement.

Briefly you considered trying to use you feet before dropping the idea. Guess you've got no choice.

Dang it! You felt kinda bummed that you'd be losing the element of surprise, but the grin soon returned, thinking about seeing Beel always you happy, regardless of the circumstances.

"Beeeeellllllllllll!" You called out, letting a bit of a whine into your voice, hey, who knows? Maybe it'd get him in front of you faster?? He tended to be on the slower side of answering his door, sometimes he simply didnt hear it. Especially if he was working out or watching tv.

Apparently, whining his name did not speed him up:(

You were about to call out again, worried he hadn't heard you, when the door clicked open. The mere sound making you feel slightly giddy. Your eyes snapping up to meet his briefly. You soaked in as many details of him as you could, without just straight ogling him, before flicking your eyes back up to meet his.

"Y/n?" He seemed pleasantly surprised, dressed in a black tank top and grey sweats (you were happy to see him wearing them, because while he looked like a whole ass meal in them, it also meant he had no plans of leaving the house tonight).

His eyes were quick to find the odd lumps wrapped up in your shirt, as well as the bit of tummy peaking out. The position you held your shirt in had caused the bottom of your stomach to show, something you had worried about on the way here, anxious about a different brother catching a glimpse of you. You could feel his stare burn against your skin, he was about to say something, but then his nose twitched, and his eyes fixed on your bundle of snacks instead.

-

Not that you minded his staring your stomach, not with Beel.

The others...maybe.

Your tummy was one of his favorite parts about you, he's hands finding their way under your shirt to touch and squeeze the soft flesh more often than not. Always gentle and non intrusive. I think he'd full on cry if he accidentally upset you somehow tbh.

Boy had absolutely no shame about it, once he learned you didnt mind much.

Especially when you seemed to be a bit shy about showing your stomach, with the others, or just in general. He made sure to let you know how much he loved your squish. Be it at RAD or just casually in the house.

The only person who ever raised a fuss over it was Mammon, although, he tended to fuss over everything you did anyways;; His protests did absolutely nothing to deter you or Beel, much to his dismay.

Sometimes, if Beel was hungry and needed a distraction or a quick 'pick me up', he'd scoop you up and just shove his face into your tummy. (Much like what I do with my cat when I'm bored and/or sad) Then he'd just hold you there until he absolutely had to let you down.

Relishing in the feel of your softness and you heart racing under your skin, fluttering so delicately under his lips, pressing his face against you was an instant mood lifter for him.

You loved it, a surprised but delighted laugh always ripping from your chest, almost subconsciously. You couldn't hide your happiness in his affections, not that you would want to (thats a lie, you cant help but be embarrassed at the end of the day by the intensive joy you felt whenever you looked at him). Which only seemed to motivate him even more, and soon each time he scooped you up, he'd kiss all over your tummy, making you giggle because it tickled, before hugging you close with a small sigh.

-

"I brought snacks, and some cuddles. So uhm, can I nap on you for a bit? 'M tired. Unless your busy or something..." you beam up at him, starting to hesitate toward the end, suddenly a little unsure.

"Pretty please?? I wont bug ya, I promise." You plead, pulling your best puppy dog eyes, shifting from one foot to the other nervously. His eyes widened as his brain processed what you said, and the cute sight in front of him. If he was being honest, it made his brain stop for a split second.

He chuckled at you and lifted you up by the back of your knees, holding you carefully to his chest, mindful of your full shirt. A small startled squeak coming from you as he did so, a sound he never got tired of hearing.

You glanced in the room as he closed to door, he had papers sprawled over the small coffee table in the middle of the room, and a few (you spotted more in the trash bin in the corner) empty food wrappers around his work space. He plopped down in front of the table again, taking only a few steps to reach it. You were kind of jealous, your short legs never being a fair match against his. Luckily he enjoyed carrying you, which solved that issue right quick.

"You can keep me company while I finish my homework." He says, shifting you into his lap and keeping a loose hold on your lower stomach, fingers splaying out to get a small feel of your exposed skin. Glancing around, you dont see belphies mop of hair in his bed, he was probably sleeping in the attic or the observatory, you quietly hum to yourself, abit happy to have Beel all to yourself for the moment. Shifting forward, Beels hands refusing to let you go and setting on your waist, you hold your shirt above the edge of the table, and let the snacks spill from your shirt before smoothing the garment back down, missing Beels frown as he looses sight of your tummy. Quickly moving to organize the snacks a bit, so that they were within reach and not scattered all over his papers and in the way.

"Thank you, your the bestest!!" You say, the dull ache in your arms more than worth the effort in your opinion.

You tilted your head back so you can look up at him. Making eye contact with him made your brain kinda just...mush. Your hands slowly squeezing his on your waist, lifting them so you move a bit.

You tore you gaze from his, before turning around and wrapping your arms around his nack and your legs around his torso,(like a koala in his opinion).

Scooting as close as you could get away with, (your not as stealthy as you give yourself credit for, he knows, he just too nice to tease you for it, and he doesn't want you to stop), so you could snuggle up to him and be comfy at the same time. Which wasn't all that hard to do with him, being the teddy bear he is.

Your eyes glazed over slightly, and you were distracted as you mind pulled your attention away.

Ah, you were in pure bliss, you could die happy like this~

You had grabbed plenty of snacks, being sure to vary in your choices, knowing Beel would like to have options, and hoping to be able to buy some extra time with him and a cute Beel smile as a reward for your effort. Tho, youd do it anyways.

Not that you'd ever admit to that. Nuh uh, no way. Unless he asked nicely, you'd give in embarrassingly fast if he ever did, the realization making your face heat up.

But...

Embarrassment be damned, youd never tell Beel 'No'.

He looks down at you, face going all blushy and soft at your slightly dazed and flushed expression. Your thoughts getting the best of you for a moment. Shaking your head slightly and letting out a resigned sigh.

"Of course you can," you snap out of it when he speaks up, looking up at him, quick to give him your full attention. "I love when you cuddle up with me, it helps me focus a bit. You didn't have to bribe me, though, as long as its you, my cuddles come free-" wrapping his arms around your shoulders, giving you a snug hug, he moves to continue. "Not that I'm complaining-" you cut him off, feeling slightly guilty about it. You were already flustered, and his sweet words weren't helping your predicament one bit. That was until your eyes actually focus on his face, oh sweet hell, hes so precious!!! Your heart thumps nearly painfully for a moment, nerves biting into your thoughts.

Your face was definitely beat red now, you could feel it at the tips of your ears even. Yet you refused to move, your eyes locked on his. A rare occurrence, one you could tell he was basking in, his eyes were glued to your face, studying it. His flush deepening slightly.

Squishing his cheeks and "shushing" him gently. Your basically cooing at him, to tired suddenly to care much about how your words or actions came off. The nervousness slipping away from your voice and movements. "Its not a bribe hun, I just felt like seeing you smile before I fell asleep on you. Heh, your smile is my goodluck charm for good dreams, ya know?" You tiredly rub his cheek with your thumb, eyes lit up happily and content. Giving him a small breathless laugh at the end.

He really did calm you down, your mind slowing down as the excitement started to fade, a fact you became overly aware of quite suddenly, your eyes feeling quite heavy now that you felt safe.

You yawned, your weariness catching up to you.

Beels quick to notice, taking note of the bags under your eyes. Dont worry, he'll make sure you get some good sleep, no bad dreams were gonna plague you on his watch. He glances over at the snacks you brought, unbelievably happy. Seeing you so cutely curled up to him, the fact that you brought him as much food as you could carry(a sight he nearly died from when he saw it) and your sweet sweet words, it definitely warmed his heart to say in the least.

He loved that you actually came to find him, just so you could cuddle. His adoration for you is bottomless, just like his hunger.

So, Beel wraps you inna big bear hug, pulling you closer and peppering the top of your head and face with kisses. He gives you a big grin, his eyes sparkling happily. "Nap, I'll wake you up when I'm done and we can hangout till dinner."

You tiredly nod, relaxing against him.

Grabbing a baggy of chips, he smooches your forehead, before tucking your face under his chin so he could munch, and see his work(not like that was much of an issue, beels a big boy after all👀), without completely covering the top of your head in crumbs (you'd told him you didn't mind, especially since he always ruffled your hair to get then out, and you loved that...but he still feels bad about it and tries to avoid it to some extent) and being able to rest his chin on top your head was just the cherry on top for him.

💗Happy beel mode activated💗

Sighing happily, you close your eyes. Beels cuddles making all your stress melt away, just like they always did. Slowly, you start to drift off, listening to the soft scratch of his pen as he starts to work and his deep breathing, letting it lull you into sleep.

I dont know why my brain wanted me to got all out on this. I literally jus couldn't stop tweaking with it. Imma post if before i decide to change it. Imma just conveniently forget i wrote this now, maybe ill like it more after a week or two... :/ also if theres any spelling or grammar issues plz tell me, its like 2am rn so im sure i missed something

[wolfcha1k]

Decided to just do another cover, since all three had one minus this one. Ngl, I traced Ugga and Grug's head shapes and stuff to get them on model bc fuck Grug is hard to draw, bodies were referenced from a photo and several screenshots in the movie. Also totally convinced Grug had plenty of hair until Eep was born and stressed it off to hell lol Below is the story that goes along with this story, featuring Grug and Ugga and a story about them in their younger days ~ - <3 - "Is this the little girl I carried? Is this the little boy at play? I don't remember growing older When did she get to be a beauty? When did he grow to be so tall? Wasn't it yesterday When they were small? Sunrise, sunset Sunrise, sunset Swiftly flow the days"

"You know, Grug. Eventually, Eep and Guy, they're going to want to start their own pack. Just like we did, it's our nature."

Grug is confused about when his little girl stopped being so little, perhaps its time Gran and Ugga tried reminding him it wasn't too long ago he was just like Guy and Eep are now.

The Sun Was a Wayfarer - Series

<Previous> Flood and Flame <next> All I Can Think About

It was really hard sometimes for Grug to accept his little girl wasn't so little anymore. She'd always been stuck like tar to his side and would demand stories as a young child. The old cave walls were filled with tiny hand prints he never realized had grown bigger until Guy came along and forced him to be reminded Eep was indeed a woman. She was seventeen summers old and the fact wasn't lost on anyone who had functioning eyes in their head.

Fathers only saw with their hearts though and inside Grug's his daughter was still that rambunctious sweet little girl who needed him to protect her. That also included suitors.

"Grug you're brooding again," he heard Ugga say from behind him.

"This is just my face." Grug shifted his weight from where he sat lounging against his favorite rock.

"Trust me, I can see them just as clearly as you can."

Grug couldn't help but stiffen at her call out of his snooping. Was it really spying though if the two were out in the open? They were together by the beach with Chunky playing third wheel. The demanding feline squeezed his way between them when he felt they were being too touchy. Or maybe it was just Grug self projecting, his cat generally liked being the center of attention. Guy and Eep were fishing by hand in the water but it soon turned into a game of seeing who could out run the tide first whilst trying to knock the other down. Chunky kept getting confused by this activity as he shook droplets off his wet paws.

Eep was in the lead by at least seven points, it wasn't like Grug was keeping track though. "Why didn't you tell me sooner Eep was all grown up?" Grug side eyed his mate who just laughed at him.

"She's up to your shoulder and gives you a hard time like every teenager, I thought it was obvious." Ugga nudged him with her elbow, her small hands were busy threading a bone needle with sinew as she sewed new clothes for her family.

"Well… she was always a stubborn girl and big for her age," he quipped as he crossed his arms.

"And then she got that doe-eyed look when mister-you-know-who showed up." Ugga batted her eyelashes playfully in emphasis and folded her hands beneath her chin a moment. It was hard to keep a straight face, Ugga quickly laughed it off. Grug set his jaw in a very uncharacteristic pout.

"Never should have stuffed him in the log," Grug said with less heart than he actually felt. Sure, he enjoyed roughing the kid up sometimes and making a big show of being upset seeing Eep with Guy but in truth he was fond of the… guy. It was still his job as a dad to scare Guy a little.

"Oh don't say that, he's practically our son now."

"Does that mean I need to protect him from Eep then?" He kept the edge of hope out of his voice the best he could as he faced his mate.

Ugga rested her chin on her fist thoughtfully, she put the needle safely away as she watched the two lovebirds chase one another on the beach. "You might, honestly," Ugga said with a warm voice. "She's a handful."

He heard a startled yelp from the shore and got to enjoy the sight of Guy yet again face planting in the sand. Eep pounced over his toppled form, he was spitting sand from his mouth.

"Gotta be faster than that!" She shouted with a victorious smile.

Guy mustered the energy to mockingly look at her like he was bothered but the toothy grin that spread on his face afterward said otherwise.

"Lovesick idiots," remarked Gran as she hobbled over to join them. She watched Eep and Guy fondly despite her toughness. "What I wouldn't give to be their age again. Especially with a boy like him, where was he fifty summers ago?"

"Ugh, I don't need that mental image," Grug mumbled with a shudder, his face surly.

"Aw Grug. Don't you remember what it was like to be young and in love?"

"I do, and that's why I'm worried!" Grug jutted a thumb behind him and caught the confused blank stare Guy gave the group at catching their gossip. "Young and hot blooded , Ugga."

Eep went over to haul Guy back up by the scruff of his neck. She shot Grug an embarrassed and irritated look that was muffled by her wild mane of red hair. "Ugh… Dad, we can hear you!"

"Good! So keep your hands to yourselves! You don't want little Eeps!" Grug paused. " I don't want more little Eeps, one of you is plenty!"

Guy gaped at them like a suffocating fish, Gran guffawed and shook her head. "Let them be, lunkhead. Not like they'll do anything in front of us, eh?" The two younger children of the Croods clan, Sandy and Thunk, looked up in confusion from where they were busy playing with Douglas a short distance away.

Eep pulled the curtain of hair over her eyes and wished for the ground to swallow her. Guy rubbed the back of his neck at the narrow eyed look Grug shot him.

Ugga rolled her eyes and began to try shooing the old woman off. "Mom, please."

"Come now, it's my generational right to tease the youngsters." Gran reached forward with her staff to hook it under the back of Grug's pelt shirt. She jerked it up with more speed than a lady her age should have, causing Grug to choke a moment as he grabbed for the shirt collar. "See? Like that! Sides, I got plenty of blackmail about you two turtledoves too. Grug was pathetic ."

Grug eyed her with a pointed glare once he was free of her pesky walking stick. Gran was unbothered, only grinned a toothy smile as she flopped comfortably onto the sand. She glanced towards Eep who perked at the potential to embarrass her father for once. It was hard to miss the mischievous wink she sent her granddaughter. Grug didn't like the curious glint in those green eyes as his spunky daughter practically skidded to seat herself near Gran. Guy followed clumsily as she had a vice grip on his hand. How Eep hadn't pulled his shoulder out along the way, Grug would never know.

It wasn't long until the entire family were seated in front of Gran. Thunk had Douglas in his lap and Sandy was curled around Belt who cooed at the attention. Ugga gave her mate a look that was screaming 'you brought this on yourself', Grug resigned himself to his fate out of pride. Real men didn't run from such things and as the patriarch he refused to be cowed by silly stories of when he was courting Ugga.

"What was dad like with mom?" Eep asked as she leaned forward, grinning. She looked at Grug who just huffed.

"Like I said, utter mushy rotten fruit. You think Guy is tooth rotting, you should have seen your father in his day." Guy pouted at being the butt of the joke as usual, he cast his dark eyes at Grug. He smirked as if to boast at the boy, smug that he wasn't going down alone in this evening razzing. "I wanted to chuck a rock at him every time he came to see Ugga."

Some of Guy's pride was built back up again though when Eep fondly rubbed shoulders with him. Grug began to wonder if it really was self-projecting this time when Chunky nosed his way between the young couple for a snuggle. Guy looked startled whilst Eep just scratched the Macawnivore between the ears.

Ugga decided to play traitor this night. "Mom how about you tell the kids about that time when Grug went on that big errand you gave him."

Grug couldn't help but wince and gave Ugga a scowl. The little minx had the nerve to grin innocently at him despite the betrayal.

"Big errand?" Guy echoed, he was barely visible from under Chunky's massive form.

"That story is my favorite," Gran cackled with a devious gleam in her eye. "And see Guy, back in our day if you wanted to court a woman you had to do something for the head of the family! Gramp was dead so I got to pick the task. Bless that heart attack he had."

Eep and Guy shared a look before both teenagers gazed questionably at Grug. He fidgeted before rolling his eyes. "That was Yesterday stuff. Besides, Guy saved us from The End with all his weird ideas so… consider the tab paid off."

"That brain thing of yours is really useful," Eep agreed with a girlish tone.

Guy blushed red at the compliment but didn't shy away from it. If anything it just made him glow proudly. "There's more where that came from," he quipped and knocked his knuckles lightly against his temple.

Grug almost wished he'd missed the bright, lovesick smiles the two shared despite Chunky barring them apart to the best of his ability. The desire for his daughter's happiness won out though, luckily for Guy who beamed. Even protective fathers and clingy Macawnivores weren't enough to stop true love it seemed.

"Anyway… it's no secret I didn't like your dad. So I came up with the most impossible task ever to earn Ugga." Gran licked her dry lips as she grunted, "Of course Grug had to go and actually do it."

"What did you make dad do?"

"Told him to go get a hair off a naked molephant."

Guy blinked. "But naked molephants don't have hair."

"Well, this is Grug so of course the nincompoop found the one blasted molephant that had hair." Grug let himself puff his chest out like a peacock preening its feathers.

"Yeah, well, you should have known better when you set me out on a job, Gran." He gave his mother-in-law a catty grin, for now he could relish in a past victory that smarted her way back when.

Eep looked at her grandmother mischievously. "So… when does the story get good?"

Ugga snickered, by now she had abandoned her sewing to sit between Thunk and Sandy. Thunk leaned against his mother as the woman combed her fingers through his scruffy mop of hair. "When he came back with his tunic ripped apart by a tusk," Ugga interjected.

"Wow," Thunk said in awe, turning his eyes to stare at Grug. Grug appreciated at least one Crood wasn't laughing at him. "How'd you do that?"

Gran cocked an eyebrow with a chuckle. "Yeah Grug, tell them."

Grug crossed his arms moodily. "Just for the record, it was a real life or death battle getting that stupid hair."

"Ugga was sewing his left buttocks for weeks," Gran said with a slap to her knee, the memory made her lifetime, really. She lifted her bony hands up to gesture with those old curled fingers of hers a measurement. "He's got a scar like this—"

"— ANYWAY! Like I was saying," Grug grumbled. He turned his attention back to his family. He scooped up a clump of sand and clay from the ground below and drew a vaguely person-like shape into the rock he had been lounging on. Then he drew a beast with tusks and a long nose next to him. "It was a battle of life and death, there I was, twenty two summers old—"

It was pure spite that kept him going hours after setting forth into the desert. Gran was convinced he couldn't win her daughter as his mate, and so when the old lizard raised the stakes he was determined to prove her wrong. He would get Ugga, she was something special and worth more than daylight itself.

He loved her and if it took getting a stupid molephant hair to be with her then so be it. Gran had been making him jump through hurdles since the day he'd met Ugga, it was no secret they shared a mutual loathing for each other. It also came from the same selfless affection the two had for Ugga, though Grug would have thought knowing he made her daughter happy was enough for her. Growling under his breath, he wiped the sweat from his brow.

There was still a good five knuckles before the sun would set, he'd find it before then. Either that or he was going to face the dangers night brought—

“You? Staying outside at night?” Eep sounded doubtful.

“... yes ,” Grug huffed.

“See? Big mush,” Gran interrupted.

"Can I finish? Nobody interrupted this much back in the cave," he grumbled moodily.

—He was sure the beast was around here somewhere as he took a cautionary sniff of the dry, dusty air. Grug could see footprints inbedded in the barren and broken ground that sand didn't cover yet. Running onwards, he pressed his knuckles into the ground as he paced himself.

Grug crossed the desert quickly and ignored the aching in his palms and feet from the hot tough earth. He was built strong and a little pain wouldn't stop his pride. He paused when the scent grew stronger, flaring his nostrils he climbed up a nearby tree to survey what was around. The sun was strong against his eyes and Grug strained through the bright rays of light to see a dark speck in the distance. In a nearby canyon below, Grug finally found what he was looking for—

"What about never being afraid?" Thunk asked his father.

Grug looked at Thunk before settling his dark eyes on his beloved Ugga. "I was afraid," he admitted with a chuckle. "But I wanted to impress your mother more. Being stubborn and hormonal is a terrible mix."

"You stubborn? No!" Eep exclaimed with a teasing grin. Guy gave her a playful look from where he was walled by Chunky.

Grug made a vague gesture with his hand and he relished in the confused faces Eep and Guy made when Chunky pressed his full weight against both of them. Guy yelped for mercy as Eep tugged on the cheeky feline that was crushing him into the sand.

"Grug! Please call him off!" A large paw cuffed his head, Guy's words quickly muffled.

"Dad!"

Grug suppressed a grin as he went back to his story. "I found the molephant so what was next was getting the hair—"

Grug couldn't say how long it took climbing down that cliff wall to reach the level the molephant was at. It was risky and went against what Grug practiced in his beliefs. Caution and fear kept him alive this long, yet here he was about to go harass an molephant for some hair it might or might not have. Dread pooled in his belly and made him cold, going after more beasts was not how he wanted this to go. Breathing heavily through his gritted teeth, Grug crept as quietly as he could across the canyon. There were many tall and small rocks around that would provide cover should he need to hide.

Grug didn't have a brain, cavemen didn't use those. At least he didn't and it showed when he found himself running full speed away from a rampaging molephant. He relied on his gut instinct to weave and dodge its massive tusks that were swung at him. Grug scrambled and whenever he managed to get close, the creature stomped it's way towards him with a vengeance.

He bit back a curse when a tusk just barely ripped part of his tunic at his chest—

"—so this is when the story gets to the best part," Eep interrupted with a cheeky hum. She'd since rescued Guy from the weight of Chunky and had him cuddled protectively in her arms. She rested her chin on his mused up brown hair. Guy idly stroked one of her hands that were interlocked at his neck and chest.

"I thought it was always at the best part," Thunk quipped in a confused voice to his sister.

"If I say anything else I'm worried I'll become Macawnivore food," Guy said and tipped his head to the side with a huff.

Ugga smiled at her children as Grug shot them a look to be silent. "Look if you want to laugh at me can I finish this up then first?"

Gran reached her staff out to bop Eep over the head, her bushy red hair cushioned the blow. "Yeah, hush your tongue."

Eep huffed when she felt Guy trying to muffle his grin into her arm. Grug shook his head at the sight, feeling a fond nostalgia swell within him despite the protective instinct. He looked at Ugga and she just arched a brow at her mate. Grug turned back to telling the story, large fingers drawing more on the rock.

"The molephant was putting up a good fight but your old dad was better—"

—He was swearing aloud and screaming as he hung onto the tusk by his shirt. Grug was glad he didn't feel wounded but this was just a disaster waiting to happen. Even the molephant seemed dismayed at the fact he now had the man stuck on his face. It kept rampaging and Grug strained against the beast in order to sink his feet forcibly into the hard earth. Dust filled the air and with his innate strength, Grug managed to swing his body around to grab it by its tusk. The molephant slowed and leaned back to buck, swinging Grug off after a lot of effort.

He was thrown through the air and scrambled to find his feet as he rolled like a big boulder. Dazed, Grug just barely got out of the way of the molephant as it charged him. Panting, Grug finally saw the hair on its angrily swishing tail. It groaned in frustration and Grug realized the molephant had gotten its massive body stuck between two rocks. Panicked and running strictly on adrenaline, Grug reached forward to yank off a clump of hair from its tail. It trumpeted its distress, Grug began to rush away but there was the sound movement. He dared to look behind him, yelling out he did all he could to escape the incredibly pissed off beast.

It only took one stupid stumble to find that in that split moment he was thrown into the air. Pain flowered under his back and rump. The last seconds felt like they were slow motion as he landed harshly into a patch of huge, prickly brambles. Everything went blurry and before he knew it, there was nothing...

He'd awoken to darkness and the scent of blood in his nose. He was tangled upside down in a bramble bush and covered in an uncomfortable amount of burrs. There was also pain in his rear end and back, Grug noted with a groan. However the panic he felt for that hair won out his concern for his current state. He couldn't go back without that blasted hair!

He froze his struggling at a sound in the distance and cowardly he hunkered down the best he could whilst suspended in the air head facing down. However, it soon turned into a voice. "...Grug! Grug?!'

"Ugga?!" He whispered harshly and in the moonlight he saw the cavewoman trotting cautiously on all fours. "I'm over here!"

Ugga hurried towards him and gave him a worried once over. Grug grinned at her concern until she scowled, harshly tugging on his ear like he was an impudent child. "Are you asking for a death wish, Grug?! Look at you! I can't believe you took mom seriously!"

"...it's good to see you too, Ugga," he grunted, pressing a hand to his ear to drown out the headache she gave him.

Ugga circled him with careful gray eyes as she tried to figure out how to get him down. "You are lucky no hungry predators sniffed you out first before I did," Ugga continued to scold.

Grug stiffened at the mention of such a risk and reached an arm to grab her shoulder as if it would protect her. "You shouldn't even be out here," he grumbled back.

"I know but after hearing mom laughing it up with the tribe about this stupid errand I needed to find you," Ugga hissed, pulling away to give him another stink eye. "I'm so mad at you right now."

"Yeah well once I find where that dumb hair went I'll be the one laughing at her!" Grug exclaimed, wiggling in an attempt to dislodge himself.

"Would you hold still? You're just going to make yourself worse," she complained and began to tear at the thicket with her strong, calloused hands.

Grug, being the stubborn man he was, continued to squirm this way and that. "I can get down myself," he huffed.

Ugga threw her hands up in frustration before yanking at a cord of bramble. "You have a head made of rocks, Grug."

Grug opened his mouth to argue back before suddenly falling. He cried out when his head hit the ground, grabbing at his neck in pain of the impact. Nursing a bump that felt like some giant goose egg, Ugga examined his tunic.

She made a noise through her teeth in fret. "How are you not dead right now?"

"I don't know!" He said with a growl, shuffling to sit up. Everything hurt from his skull to his toes that spread out in the pulse of his blood. "But between you, your mom and that molephant, all of you are really trying to bury me!"

Ugga rolled her eyes and spun him around, she pulled up his shirt before Grug could even protest. "You're lucky," she sighed, relief warming her voice. "That molephant tusk missed a major arterie. Really ruined your tunic though."

He softened and reached a hand out to touch her arm. "I got other shirts."

"It's probably going to scar. Can you walk?" Ugga faced him once again, he couldn't help but frown as he watched her wipe her bloody palm in the sand. My blood, Grug thought with a pained wince.

The adrenaline of the moment and even beyond it was wearing off, Grug really wanted to go back to his cave to nurse his wounds and ego. "I think so. Um… help balance me?"

A smile lit up her face and Grug wondered if it was the blood loss or her that made him sway breathlessly. "Sure." Ugga offered her arm to him which he took.

However, he stopped with a groan. "Ugh… wait. The hair, I'm not going back without that hair!"

"Forget the hair, Grug. Mom will get over it."

"Oh no! Ugga, I'll never hear the end of it if I don't give her that stupid hair!" Grug let go of Ugga to try peering through the darkness on the ground, crouching on his knuckles.

Ugga put her hands on her hips. "What is so important about getting my mom this hair? Naked molephants don't even have hair."

Grug just stuck a finger at her triumphantly. "Yes, yes they do and I swear to the sun it's not just me getting loopy from all this blood loss."

"Grug, you're scaring me," Ugga said in a deadpanned tone, brows arched.

"That old lizard can't keep us apart anymore after this," he continued to ramble on and on.

"Grug…"

"If it's a hair that ancient fossil wants in order to get her out of mine for good then so be it," he continued.

" Grug!"

"What?!"

"If you want to be my mate so bad why don't you just ask me yourself?"

Grug stopped his frantic search and stiffened up like a ribbit being hunted by a liyote. He turned to face her and saw she looked disappointed, arms crossed over her muscular chest. "Um… excuse me?" He wanted to kick himself for stuttering, he wasn't a boy anymore.

"I'm not something to trade for, and the fact you actually went through with it astounds me." Ugga shook her head with a sigh.

Grug shuffled his weight uncomfortably, he'd never been good at addressing his feelings out in the open like that. Even if it was for Ugga whom he loved dearly. "I know you're not an object, Ugga."

"Then why ask mom?"

"I… I don't know. I guess… I got tired of her talking badly about, you know… us." Grug looked at her with a frown, uncharacteristically vulnerable.

Ugga reached out to cup his cheek in her hand as she stood in front of him. "Mom says a lot of things, you really need to tune her out."

He turned his head to brush his nose against her palm in a fond gesture, slouching. "She always says I'm no good for you, Ugga."

"Well, lucky for us mom isn't the one you have to court. It's me." She leaned back on her heels, still stroking his face with a gentle touch for a woman as fierce as Ugga.

"I'm just saying, getting her to shut up would be a win win to this mess." Grug shrugged his shoulders in a dismissive way, a small grin on his face.

Ugga rolled her eyes at him. "You and your manly pride are going to get you into trouble."

"If I'm already in trouble I might as well finish up," he quipped. Grug found his molephant hair amongst the broken debris the molephant had left in its rampaging wake, he’d lifted it up triumphantly in the moonlight. Ugga shook her head. “Okay, now, we can go back!”

When they returned, the sun had started to rise over the desert as dawn chased off the night. Gran had stood outside the dwelling she shared with Ugga, her scowl etched deep into her wrinkled features. The other families were creeping out of their dens in preparation of the morning hunt and foraging, their curious eyes were shocked to see Grug limping back into the canyon with Ugga supporting his hulking mass.

Grug shoved the wad of hair into Gran's face with a low growl, "Here's your stupid hair!" The old woman took it with muted shock for once, gaping mouth wide as she looked between Grug and Ugga. With a burst of adrenaline and pride, he looped his massive arm around Ugga's waist to haul her over his shoulder.

She gave a startled laugh, lightly smacking her fists into his back. "We're going back to this tradition, are we?"

"I gotta make sure your mom doesn't try anything again, you're as good as mine now," Grug huffed, limping with his Ugga secured in his grasp like she weighed light as a feather.

"You're too much, Grug."

"You've never complained before," he shot back with a grin.

"C'mon big guy, I think all that blood loss is affecting your head. Let me patch you up."

Grug headed for his cave, merry that he'd gotten Ugga and at the same time shut that awful lizard of a mother-in-law up. It costed him his pride, he noted, it was hard to ignore the snickering of the families around them. He only bared his teeth at them which seemed to work for the moment. Once his back was turned the whispering and giggling continued.

Ugga merely pressed her forehead into the back of his neck and it made everything better… least until Gran moved in but that was a different story for another tomorrow.

Grug finished his story with flourish, loosely drawing what seemed to be a lopsided circle around the two images presenting Ugga and himself.

"I like that story," Eep said, a bit dreamily as she looked at the pictures. "It wasn't really embarrassing though."

"It was if you were there," Grug scoffed as he wiped his clay covered hands on his pelt.

"Well, it still makes me laugh at least," Gran said from where she sat, cackling.

"You laugh at anything that has me getting beat up," he pointed out, surprisingly with a much more amiable tone.

"Not true, now that you learned some jokes I laugh at other things too."

Ugga smiled fondly at her mate, letting Thunk sit up so she could go wrap her arms around his bicep in a hug. "Thank you," Ugga said, rubbing her nose into his cheek.

Grug softened and felt his ears burn, giving her a small smile. His eyes fell to his audience and he couldn't help lingering on Eep who still had Guy draped in her lap. They were gazing at one another like nobody else existed around them for the moment, Guy lifting a finger to fondly boop her nose.

Ugga shook her head. "Let them be, you remember what it was like still." She patted his arm fondly with a knowing smile.

Grug huffed but said nothing, just reluctantly looked away from the two lovestruck teenagers. "I've been lounging around too much anyway." He tried shrugging off the blatant teenage romance going on right in front of him. "Since they're busy, dinner duty is on me now." The plan had been fish but he knew that failed disastrously from the word go.

He grabbed Thunk by the shoulder and the boy protested a moment, Douglas scampered between their legs as Grug lead the way towards the woodland hugging the beachfront. Ugga watched Grug go, sighing like she was a girl of twenty summers old again. She reached down to grab Sandy who wiggled in her arms, Ugga tucked her under her elbow without batting an eye over the feral snarling. She cast one last look at Eep and Guy before walking off herself, intending to put Sandy down for a nap.

"C'mon you little scamp," Ugga told her daughter. "You need all the rest you can get for when Dada comes back with food."

"Hey… where did everybody go?" Eep found a moment to look away from Guy to realize the clearing had been well… cleared out. Only one that remained was Gran, the old battle ax of a woman rolled her eyes.

Guy lingered his gaze on her still. "I don't know but you are still here so it's not a problem yet for me."

She fought off a smile best she could but failed at his widening one.

"About time the two of you joined us back in this world," she grunted in a teasing tone, her joints creaking as she pushed herself to her feet.

"Oh, hey Gran." Guy waved a hand idly in her direction.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Eep inquired, huffing.

"Oh, you know very well what I mean," Gran replied, stretching a kink out of her back. She gave a satisfied sigh at the pop, leaning comfortably against her stick. "Anyway lovebirds… I want my afternoon nap now. Laughing at Grug really wipes an old lady out."

"Hold on a second!" Eep exclaimed, springing up to her feet. She unceremoniously hefted Guy up in her arms as she did so, his dark eyes only startled for a second. "Why is that story your favorite, really?" Eep asked with a squint.

She put Guy back on his own two feet though clung to his bicep. He leaned against her solid form without a thought, it came as easy as breathing air. "You and Grug didn't seem to have the best relationship," Guy added thoughtfully as he looked at her.

Gran huffed through what was left of her teeth, shaking her head. "It reminds me of how foolishly in love you two are," she chuckled at the matching blushes on their faces. "Being so devoted that you go and do something stupid to prove it. I'd watch your back Guy, Grug knows he can get you to climb in Chunky's mouth if it means Eep is your reward for it."

"Eep isn't a thing," he sputtered.

Eep couldn't help but playfully jab his ribs. "I'm not a catch then?"

"Of course you are!" Even at her most gentle, Eep knocked the wind out of him and he was wheezing.

"See! That is what I mean," Gran cackled as she reached out to pat Guy fondly on the shoulder. "Lovesick idiot. Eep has you down pat. That's okay though, us ladies like a man who's easy to boss around." She winked at Eep and Guy.

She heard Eep's disgruntled scoff as she turned away, a mischievous grin tugging her old lips. "Do try to behave yourselves. Well, I'll say ta-ta for now, loves." Leaving the two to their own devices at last, Gran began to hobble off after the direction her daughter Ugga had gone.

Guy stared at the pathway until Gran was a mere speck and turned to look at Eep. "Am I easy to boss around?"

"Behave ourselves," Eep said, pouting. "She's acting like we have no restraint!"

Guy chuckled with a teasing grin, leaning down to brush his lips against the hinge of her jaw. She immediately melted. "Maybe she's kinda right about that, at least," he mumbled against her chin.

Eep nuzzled herself closer to him, feeling his breath fan her neck. “We probably shouldn’t prove her right, you know how Gran is.”

Guy just huffed and began to pepper her neck and face in kisses, Eep had no complaints despite her playful refusal. Rebellion just came with being young, even if the old codger would relish in teasing them later for it.

[mindingmyownbusiness]

Rescue (5/?)

Pairing - Bucky x Reader Soulmate AU Summary - You’ve always believed your soulmate was out there somewhere, Bucky not so much. What happens when he finally takes a leap of faith and reaches out to you? Warnings - some canon-typical violence in later chapters, the occasional curse word, but I promise to make up for it with loads of fluffiness Chapter Word Count - 1798 Notes - Posting has gone from once a week to super sporadic lol (sorry everyone!). My goal is currently to have it finished before school starts in a few weeks. Inspired by Rescue by Lauren Daigle and by a lot of the concepts in Sense8.

Series Masterlist - Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4

...a few weeks later...

“Dogs or cats?” Bucky was leaning back against his headboard, idly flipping a knife as he listened for your answer.

“Hmmm… that’s a tough one. I’m gonna say cats for right now, dogs later when I have a bigger place. I’d feel bad leaving a pupper cooped up in here while I’m at work.” You rinsed your plate and set it in the drying rack, moving to drain the sink and reaching for a dishtowel.

“I get that. Been thinking of getting a cat myself. It’d be nice to have around but would also drive Sam crazy, win-win. Your turn, Y/N.”

“Any broken bones?” You asked as you hung the dishtowel up and headed to get ready for bed.

Bucky barely stifled a laugh. “More than I care to count, doll, ribs and fingers mostly. Comes with the job.”

You try to picture him shrugging his shoulders like what he said was no big deal as you finish washing your face, shaking your head as the image fails you. “Wow… I forget how dangerous your job is sometimes…” you whispered the last bit to yourself but you knew he had to have heard you.

Not willing to let you dwell on that thought, Bucky presses forward, “How ‘bout you, hmm? Break an arm maybe? Collarbone...?”

“Nope, not a single one actually. I did have to get stitches once but I was so young I don’t remember it. Busted my face on the corner of a table when I was a toddler. Still have the scar.” You peer closer into your bathroom mirror, gently running a finger over the thin white line.

“Ouch… maybe we’ll compare scars one day..”

Bucky sheaths his knife, turning out his bedside lamp and slipping under his sheets, staring up at the ceiling with his hands behind his head. Meanwhile you’ve slipped into your pjs and climbed into bed as well, a comfortable silence enveloping you both as you tuck into a ball under your covers. Your mind begins to wander, the dark and the quiet opening doors to thoughts and questions that typically remain dormant during the light of day.

“Hey Bucky?”

“Yeah, doll?”

“Can I ask you a hard question?”

“Sure…” His heartbeat picked up, suddenly wary of what you were about to ask.

“Did um… w-were you one of the ones that got dusted?” 

He let out a slow breath, the memories of that terrible day playing back in his mind. “Yeah… not the most comfortable feeling.”

“Same. I remember… I remember being so confused and then… nothing. Until we all blipped back that is. Adjusting to a world that went on without you for five years hasn’t exactly been a walk in the park.”

“Tell me about it…” he murmurs, his thoughts going much further back than the five short years you both lost, the statement ringing with more truth than he was ready to admit yet.

You clear your throat, “Well, I certainly ruined the mood.” Laughing nervously you forge on. “Time for a new topic, I think it’s your turn...?”

“Sure, let’s see…  how are things at work?”

“It’s alright, nothing exciting really. It’s not my dream job or anything, but it pays the bills and the girls I work with are pretty nice so there’s that. How about you? I’m sure your job and the people you work with are a thousand times more interesting than what I’ve got going on.”

Bucky smiles fondly, “Well you already know Sam, can’t live with him, can’t work without him. He’s fun to mess with but I couldn’t ask for a better friend or partner… not since my last one anyway... But Sam’s not nearly as reckless as Steve. Steve was a handful in the best of times, always looking for a fight but in a good way, never backed down when he knew it was the right thing to do… Feels like I’ve been watching his back my whole life…”

“Sounds like you two were close? Did he… did something happen...?”

“Oh yeah he ah.. he sorta retired..? Just decided he was tired of putting his life on hold for the next mission. I supported him but it was still hard to see him go.”

“That’s very noble of you Bucky. You are an amazing friend and partner. He was so lucky to have you.” The admiration and pride in your voice is unmistakable. 

Not one for taking compliments well, a flustered Bucky attempts to lighten the situation. “Life goes on right? The world may be getting weirder every day, especially since everyone came back, but I think I’ve found my place in it.”

“That’s so good to hear… I still feel a bit out of place, most of my friends survived the blip and are just in completely different places in their lives than I am. We still talk but I don’t think it’ll ever be the same…” You pulled your blanket tighter around yourself, snuggling deeper into your nest and shaking off the negative thoughts clouding your mind.  “So, tell me more about Sam, what makes him so fun to mess with?”

Bucky can’t help but laugh, “Literally everything. He’s so dramatic and it’s way too easy to push his buttons. Just the other day, we were training and he was working on throwing his shie---umm I mean this new sort of weapon and I mayyyy have been telling him the wrong thing just so it would knock him on his ass. Laughed about that for days.” 

You found yourself laughing right along with him, eventually ending with a sweet sigh. “What I wouldn’t give to see you smile...”

Bucky stops laughing abruptly and you immediately know you’re the cause of the sudden tension between you. Unlike previous times however you resolve not to cave or opt for the awkward smooth-over. Time to face your fears, Y/N.

“Bucky, part of me desperately wants to apologize for saying that but honestly, the rest of me isn’t sorry at all. I really do want you to be totally comfortable with me and I know I promised not to push you but… I need you to know that seeing you, eventually touching and being with you is something I genuinely want. I mean how could I not want that with the man that I lo--” the words stuck in your throat as you caught yourself, “...th-that I’m meant to be with? You’re my soulmate Bucky, you have to know what that means to me, to us.”

Bucky felt like he was torn in two, reluctant to admit that the thought of letting you all the way in was getting to be as stressful as keeping you out but then again he was the stubborn type. “It’s not just about you seeing me doll, it’s about what seeing me will mean, it’s about my whole life and all the crazy that it entails.”

“You know… you know you can be honest with me right? I can handle it, I promise. There is literally nothing that you could tell me that would drive me away from you, okay? Nothing.”

“How can you promise me that?. You can’t possibly mean it. You don’t know… you don’t know my whole story. It’s not a pretty one.” You can feel his walls going up but you can’t hold it in any longer. It’s now or never...

“What if…” you swallow nervously, “w-what if I told you I did know. That I know you better than you think I do...” 

Your words flowed like ice through his veins. “What are you saying Y/N?” 

“I-I started to put two and two together almost immediately, as soon as you told me your name. It’s not that common you know....” He’s so quiet you wonder if he has stopped breathing. Knowing there’s no turning back you continue, “And there were so many little things that kept adding up: that you were so reluctant to let me see you, how you told me you used to be military but now you work in security... that you live and train with Sam, Sam Wilson right? Or that time you were out of contact for a week and the story broke about the Falcon and the Winter Soldier taking down that terrorist cell? I know that was you Bucky, I’m not crazy.”

You took a deep breath, calming down a bit. “Did you really think your soulmate would be that clueless? That the person meant to be with you. a literal Avenger, wouldn't be able to figure it out? I’m not upset with you, I promise. It's not like you lied to me, everything you said was ‘technically’ the truth. But... the more I learned about you the more I confirmed my hunch and the more I felt like I was lying to you, and that just didn’t sit well with me.”

Silence was all you could hear on Bucky’s end but you knew he was still there. You gnawed at your lower lip worried that you had made a horrible mistake. “I wanted to come out and just tell you, so many times, but at the same time I had promised not to push you. I was waiting for you to be ready to tell me but I was also starting to worry that it was never going to happen. Bucky I’m so sorry, I--”

Bucky blurted out, “Why are you still here then?! You should have shut me out already. How could finding out not change how you felt about me? Y/N, I’m not just some guy with a military past and a job that takes me away for days, weeks, sometimes months at a time, that’s enough to put a strain on any relationship. But I’m also over a hundred years old, I deal with literal alien threats, and a-and I’ve killed so many people… those memories, the things they did to me, that part of my life is a literal hellhole, and it doesn’t go away, ever. It’s always with me… all those years without memories and now I’d give anything to forget…” You could hear his labored breathing, the anguish in his voice. Tears welled up in your eyes for him, ashamed that you’d hurt him but also desperate to be the one to comfort him. “Y/N I’m-- I’m sorry, I have to go. I need some space right now.” 

“Wait Bucky, don’t---” and just like that the connection severs. Not completely thank goodness, you can still sense your bond deep down, but you feel as though a chasm has formed between the two of you.

“I’m not going anywhere Bucky… I love you...” you whisper into the silence, hoping somewhere, somehow that he can still hear you.

Part 6

Taggy tag tags: @bucky-plums-barnes @buckyywiththegoodhair @avengerofyourheart @sebspocketsquare @sgtbxckybxrnes @bionic-buckyb  @plumfondler @imaginingbucky @sexonastickstan @angryschnauzer @witchymarvelspacecase @palaiasaurus64 @eyecandybarnes @promarvelfangirl @the-observant-fangirl @ballyhoobarnes @trinityjadec @kjs-s @sebbytrash @true-queen-of-mischief @buckthegrump @moondancewrites @thisisjamesbarnes @beccaanne814 @oneshot-shit @moonbeambucky @stevieang @tnupsweetpie @avenger-nerd-mom @eyesfixedonthesun22 @searchingforbucky @notimetoblog @sugarfreecapsicle @nomadicpixel @nacho-bucky @sarahwroteathing @captain-rogers-beard @buckys-darling @tilltheendwilliwrite @ifellinnthepit

@marie-is-in-the-dark @lorilane33 @igothroughphasesalot

[maerenee930]

7, 10, 34, 47, 55 from the 65 questions :)

7. what shirt are you wearing?

- a black cropped tank top i got from Torrid and a Black sweatshirt i got from Hot Topic that has Sam from Supernatural on it and on the back it says Moose 😅 (it’s one of my favorite sweatshirts 🥰🖤)

10. what were you doing at midnight last night?

- i was laying in my bed. my depression was (and still kinda is, tbh) pretty bad and i didn’t feel like watching anything, so i just laid in bed, was letting myself feel how i need to and just let myself be. idk how else to describe it lol. i just was there 😅 and then my younger cousin came in my room (she stayed the night for the past few nights lol) and she was gonna get ready to go to bed and then she was being all goofy and singing some weird song she made up and that made me think of something, which lead us to bringing up random little (i guess) inside jokes we’ve made over the past 2 days and from last week and we got in one of those laughing fits for like almost 10 minutes 😅 like where we just ended up laughing at each other laughs and it somehow made it even funnier even though all of it was really stupid lol.

47. if you could ask your future self one question, what would it be?

- are you living the way you’ve always wanted to and dreamed of?

(going on adventures, traveling with friends and a significant other. doing what my heart desires. living life to the fullest and doing what makes me truly happy)

55. can you do any accents other than your own?

- umm… i can kind of do a british accent. like not a super cheesy or the typical one people do to make themselves sound fancy lol. i love doctor who and have watched so many other english shows so when i’m alone i will talk to myself or my cat in those accents lol. oh or one time one of my best friends and i talked in british accents the whole day and later that night (like maybe 1am lol) we went out to eat with my brother and we were still talking like that (it was hard to stop and we were having too much fun lol) and when we got to the restaurant, my brother told us that if he didn’t stop with the accent, he was gonna get in his car and leave us there 😂 it was so funny. we didn’t mean to annoy him lol but it was an added bonus lmao. and then when we got in the restaurant we slipped in and out of it and it kept making my brother so mad 😂 we weren’t doing it on purpose 😅 we just couldn’t help it.

and i can kind of do an italian accent. both my grandparents on my mom’s side are from (born and raised) italy. so they have kinda strong accents and when we make fun of my papa (my grandpa. it’s okay, he’s an ass and deserves to be made fun of) we all talk like him and do his accent 😅

and i can barely do an irish, australian or russian accent. i just try them after watching certain things and i’m not really good at them lol. if anyone wants to hear me do any of the accents i mentioned, let me know and i will absolutely make a fool of myself to entertain anyone who wants it lol.

34 is answered under here ⬇️ my answer for the next one is super long (i am so so so sorry, i didn’t mean for it to and just thought i would do this so that no one had to try and scroll past it if they didn’t want to read it. i hope that makes sense lol)

34. what was your last dream about?

- so i don’t remember my dreams from last night, but i do remember the ones from the night before 😅 so i was at some hockey game (no idea why, not really a fan of hockey at all lmao) and so in the dream not only was Robert Sheehan there, but there were some characters from a movie i used to love as a kid (a live action movie. not a cartoon lol) and the characters from that movie were flirting with me and at some point randomly one of them told me they made a bet with someone that i wouldn’t give them a kiss (i have no idea why… lmao) so i ended up giving them both a kiss each and then nothing ended up coming from that lol.

and then there was this really cute girl in my dream who was flirting with me on and off through out the whole dream and at one point she was leaving this restaurant i went to after the hockey game (she was at the game as well and then happened to be at the same restaurant afterward lol) and gave me her number, told me to call her sometime and then she kissed me and it was really cute lol.

and then not long after that, Rob came to that restaurant and i guess in my dream, he was one of my best friends and so we sat down at a table and after we ordered food and while we were eating, we were talking and catching up. and okay one point he was asking me how my day was and what i’d been up to and so i filled him in on all of it and i could see he was getting a bit bothered by it. so i asked him if he was alright and he ended up saying to me, he wanted to tell me something that’s been on his mind for a while now but didn’t know how to say it and didn’t want to make me uncomfortable.

i remember getting really nervous cause i didn’t know where he was going with this and was pretty sure i made him upset and i didn’t know why or what i might’ve done. (my anxiety likes to make me feel like i’ve done something wrong at any chance it gets 🙃) so i asked him if i did something wrong and he reassured me that i didn’t but he didn’t wanna talk about it in here. so we end up going to his place (apparently in my dream he was renting a house to stay in while he was in the US cause we were definitely no at his place in London lol. it didn’t look like it at all 😅)

and so we get settled in his place and sat down and he took me hands and apologized for not wanting to talk about this in the restaurant, for making me wait to talk about it and he understands i must be feeling pretty anxious because he didn’t give me any indication as to what he wanted to talk about. and then he also apologized for not saying this sooner. so i reassured him it was alright and that i understand him wanting to talk about whatever it is at his place and asked him again if everything is alright. so as we’re sitting on his couch, i’m sitting on it facing him but like with my legs crossed up on the couch (idk how else to describe it lol)

he scooted in closer to me and told me that he had a hard time hearing me talk about flirting with other people and saying that i kissed them. he told me it hurt him even though he tried so hard to not let it get to him or bother him but he couldn’t help it. (i honestly didn’t expect things to go in this direction lol)

so i nodded and apologized that it hurt him. i told him i truly didn’t mean to and didn’t know that was something that would’ve bothered him. i told him that i don’t ever want to hurt him and i’m so sorry that i did. he smiled sweetly at me and put his left hand on my right cheek and kinda on my neck and jawline, and told me that it was okay and i didn’t need to apologize. he said that’s not why he told me that. he didn’t mean to make me feel bad. he just wanted to be honest with me. and as he said it, he gently rubbed his thumb on my cheekbone, and said speaking of being honest, he told me that for so long he had a crush on me. he really likes me and wish he had said something sooner.

he told me he hadn’t because he couldn’t tell if i was just being nice to him or if i was flirting with him and he said honestly that he didn’t expect to have feelings for me or fall for me.

he said when he met me for the first time, he could tell we were gonna become really good friends but he honestly didn’t expect to fall for me. he said he realized how shallow this was going to sound but i’m not normally the type of person physically that he’s attracted to. (i mean, i highly doubt he would be attracted to me seeing as how i’m 5’1 and plus size lol) so he apologized for how rude that came off and i reassured him that i completely understood and wasn’t offended.

i could see he was starting to kinda beat himself up because this wasn’t going how he wanted it to and it broke my heart 🥺 i ended up putting my hands on his cheeks, pulled his face in close to mine and told him that it’s okay. i understand what he’s trying to say and i appreciate him being so honest. he gave me a little smile but still looked somewhat upset with himself. he kinda sighed and thanked me for understanding. he gave me these sweet little puppy dog eyes and said “i just- i just love you and am so in love with you and i don’t want to lose you”.

so extremely touched by what he said i blushed and gave him a smile, looked into his gorgeous green eyes and told him that i feel the exact same way about him. i said that i’ve felt that way since before we met but didn’t want to say anything because i honestly didn’t think he did or would ever feel that way about me. (and i didn’t wanna come off weird and only have him see me as a fan and then not wanna be my friend lol) but i told him that i’m so unbelievably happy that he does and i’m so in love with him, too. he gave me the cutest smile. then i pulled he face closer to mine and we kissed 🥰 after we did, he smiled and said “you have no idea how long i’ve wanted to do that” and i told him, me too. so then he kissed me again and things progressed pretty quickly to where we ended up making out for a bit 😅 and then after that, he asked me if he could be my boyfriend 🥺 and i said i would absolutely love that 💙 and he gave me a little kiss on the nose and then i snuggled up into his side and we watched something and then i woke up 😅 - sorry i didn’t mean to ramble so much and go into so much detail lol. it just really stuck in my mind and wanted to share as much as i remembered 😅 i know it’s pretty cheesy lol.

[diaryofageekgirl]

Mostly for myself b/c I want to make sure I don’t lose this somehow, but here’s the literal two hour conversation that @i-miss-balthazar and I spent talking about Benny/Balthazar:

i-miss-balthazar You were the Kat from my quiz??? I had no idea you shipped those pairings! And also Madison helping Sam in purgatory would’ve been way more fitting!

diaryofageekgirl Yeah I do! I have plans to do a rewrite of seasons 8 & 9, but it'll be forever before I get to them -_- And I love Madison a whole lot and would have loved to see her in Purgatory!

^What I meant by the season rewrites is I would include those ships in them lol

i-miss-balthazar You would :0

I need to read it

Please tag me, I’m BEGGING

diaryofageekgirl When I get to writing it I will!

i-miss-balthazar Do you have any Benny/Balthazar head canons???

diaryofageekgirl I could also write you a Benny/Balthazar one shot.......on a completely unrelated note, when's your birthday? 👀

i-miss-balthazar April 28th and that would make my entire year oh my goodness there isn’t enough Benny/Balthazar content out there

diaryofageekgirl 👌

i-miss-balthazar I didn’t mean to ship them so much it kinda just happened

Maybe I just want them to feel loved 😂

diaryofageekgirl I see Benny as someone who's very openly affectionate, and Balthazar as being someone who craves affection but sort of hides behind a sarcastic front? So Benny just s l o w l y wears him down into accepting all this love and adoration and Bal pretending to hate it but is secretly melting

oh mood

i-miss-balthazar Oh my goodness my HEART 🥺 that’s the sweetest headcanon ever and I totally see it. Benny would give the best hugs, I think.Balthazar’s 100% a little spoon xD

diaryofageekgirl He's got big strong arms - great for hugging & being the big spoon 😉

i-miss-balthazar For some reason I feel like Benny is taller than he actually is? Like I looked it up and Ty Olsson is only 5’10, but I always thought he was like 6’3 😂

Have you ever written about them before that I could read???

diaryofageekgirl WAit, he's 5'10???????

i-miss-balthazar Almost 5’11 I forgot about the decimal

diaryofageekgirl No, I haven't written anything for them yet. I'm working on my finale fix-it right now, then depending on how long that takes I might be going straight into femslash february after that. But after that I will at some point

aaaaaaand I just came up with another timestamp for the mer!verse

selkie!benny & merrow!balthazar

i-miss-balthazar Y e s

I had to look up what those are but wow am I glad I did

It’s perfect

i-miss-balthazar I like the idea of Balthazar playing cool in public but when it’s just the two of them he’s an absolute suck for attention, like a cat 😂

In public: sarcasm is my main form of communication In private: please hold me 🥺

diaryofageekgirl Oh for sure, just like, flat up against Benny's back, arms over his shoulders like "pay attention to me" 😩

i-miss-balthazar What about pet names for each other???

diaryofageekgirl I mean, just imagine Benny's deep Cajun voice calling Bal "mon amour". OR "MON ANGE"

and bal would call him something totally sappy in enochian but then tell him it means "pain in the ass" or smth

i-miss-balthazar Balthazar stealing Benny’s tee shirts even though they’re way to big for him because they remind him of Benny

diaryofageekgirl yessssssss

i-miss-balthazar Benny has nightmares about pirating/purgatory so Balthazar visits his dreams to calm him down and make him happy again because he can’t stand seeing Benny upset

diaryofageekgirl They're a nightmare in the kitchen bc Benny worked as a chef for years and is very particular about how certain dishes are made but Bal just keeps Adding More Alcohol

i-miss-balthazar Benny: no, you need to boil the alcohol out to use this Balthazar: that takes away all the fun!

diaryofageekgirl Benny: If you put too much alcohol in it won't set properly! Balthazar: That sounds like a You problem

i-miss-balthazar An iss-YOU not an iss-ME!! *pours more in*

diaryofageekgirl 🤣🤣🤣

i-miss-balthazar Benny’s not a morning person, and because Balthazar doesn’t need sleep he’s a morning person by default. So Benny’s always tired and grumbly in the mornings while Balthazar’s carrying on as usual so Benny will just catch him by the waist as he’s walking by to pull him into a hug and rest his chin on his angel’s shoulder because he’s still tired and just wants snuggles

diaryofageekgirl And Bal tries to keep doing whatever he was doing before and Benny just reaches out behind him and forces him to set whatever it is down and physically puts Bal's arms around him 🥰

i-miss-balthazar Midnight sailing date 🥰

diaryofageekgirl Midnight sailing date out over bioluminescent algae bloom: https://www.australiangeographic.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/11.jpg

i-miss-balthazar It kinda looks like angel grace if you squint

diaryofageekgirl That's exactly what I thought! (Benny def brings them there bc it makes him think of Balthazar's grace)

i-miss-balthazar Since Balthazar’s an angel and doesn’t technically need his blood do you think Benny could use him as a food source so he wouldn’t have to worry about robbing blood banks/eating people

diaryofageekgirl yessssssss that's exactly what I think!!! And Benny's unsure about it at first, kinda scared to bite him bc he's so used to his bite killing or turning people but Bal convinces him and it's so much better than blood bags

i-miss-balthazar Plot twist Balthazar’s blood alcohol content gets Benny drunk😂

diaryofageekgirl there's a blood of Christ joke in there somewhere but I can't think of it 🤔

i-miss-balthazar And the wine is my blood -last supper or something I haven’t been to church in awhile 😂

diaryofageekgirl Do you think he'd ever get a bit of grace along with the blood?

i-miss-balthazar In theory, I could see it happening. what would that taste/feel like I wonder

diaryofageekgirl I imagine it would be a moment of absolute euphoria

i-miss-balthazar Benny’s grip on Balthazar would tighten sharply, and Balthazar would let out a soft gasp of surprise and delight at the sudden possessiveness because secretly he loves it when Benny gets like that

diaryofageekgirl 😍😍😍 And Benny gets all blushy and apologetic about it later and Balthazar is just like "Don't you dare apologize for that. In fact, do it more often."

i-miss-balthazar My goodness I need more Benny/Balthazar content they’re just so perfect and I love them

diaryofageekgirl You could always write some 👀👀👀 Be the change you want to see in the world 👀👀👀

i-miss-balthazar Mmm soft movie nights where they’re bundled in a soft blanket and Balthazar’s in Benny’s lap so Benny can idly play with his hair while they watch the show. Neither of them particularly care about the movies they just like the cuddles

diaryofageekgirl (If you did I would be so down to read it)

i-miss-balthazar I might have to. However I promised myself I’d finish writing the next chapter in my main wip before I started another project so I may need some time.

diaryofageekgirl that's fair. Let me know if you do end up writing something for them

i-miss-balthazar Absolutely!!!!

[fetchisnotawordgretchen]

Hey! If you don’t mind 😏✌🏼 could I please have an Ikemen Vampire match up? I’m 17 and i’m 5”10! I’m a type of person who likes to tease a lot and accidentally make people mad...i also have anger issues. I like to draw, play piano and take pictures of things outside~ I like the color red because I like fire~ i’m allergic to peanuts and shell fish so i usually eat soup and crackers! I really like cats but don’t hate dogs. I’m also a big night owl! Thank you so much and have a good day/night~ ❤️

Hmmm I really had to think about this one. In my opinion I think you have a mixture of Arthur, Vincent, and Leonardo. But I came to a decision... I'm pairing you up Leonardo!

Leonardo has a way of calming people down when they are upset or angry. I could just see you getting angry over something and Leonardo swooping you off your feet just to kiss you on you forehead.

Pet names for you would include!:

Cara mia

Tesoro

Beautiful

Squirrel

Mozart would probably say no if you asked him if you could use his paino. So Leonardo builds you one! All though Le Comte tells him not to because there isn't any room. Leonardo would also sketch things with you outside, maybe you guys might even discuss what the clouds look like!

Here's a conversation you might have:

"Cara mia.... It's one thing that my sleep schedule is messed up but, it's another thing that yours is too!

It's not good for you if you stay up too late... C'mon we can sleep together tonight. Follow me, or do you want a piggy back ride?"

Snuggling positions!!:

You are the big spoon! Leonardo loves to fall asleep feeling your arms embrace his waist. In the middle of the night he'll probably turn around and watch you peacefully sleep.

He'll stroke hair out of your face and put his head ontop of yours, careful to not crush you.

Leonardo will fall asleep listening to your heartbeat thinking about how much you changed his life

☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆♡☆

I hope you liked your match! Yours was a bit difficult then I thought it would be lol. But I still hoped you enjoyed!

[redvelvetreel]

Red Velvet Reel 8: Dirt Nap:

              [Fic Directory]

Pairing: [Married] Spicyhoney (Underfell Papyrus x Underswap Papyrus)

Summary: Edge is sleeping in too much, and it's starting to freak Stretch out. Too bad he sucks at confrontations, and Edge takes this opportunity to springboard into a topic Stretch never ever wants to discuss. Now they're both unhappy.

Characters: Edge (Underfell Papyrus) & Stretch (Underswap Papyrus)

Contains: Mpreg/Skelepreg! Domestic Fluff! Sleepy Edge! Worried Stretch! Anxiety! Discussions of death and wills! Crying! Emotional hurt/comfort (mild tho)! Misunderstandings! 

Rating: Teen and up! (I guess?)

Note: The official start of Phase II! :D Should clarify the title is a pun/double entendre, lol, nobody actually dies!

Sleepy mornings were his favorite.

Edge was too tired and out of it to put up his usual defenses, indulging in the raw affection he sometimes struggled with in his more alert moments. Waking up to see his husband snuggled up against him, so openly relaxed and at peace, never failed to soothe the unspoken concerns in Stretch’s soul.

...Were.

Stretch shifted into a more comfortable position, propping his head up on his arm as he watched Edge sleep. He stroked down the arms wrapped around his waist absently, glancing at the clock on the bedside table.

11:30.

There was that familiar prickle of concern. This was the second weekend in a row Edge slept in past 10. He usually only ‘slept in’ until 8:30.

“Darlin’,” he asked softly, running a gentle hand down a shoulder blade and along the humerus, “Are you feeling well?”

“Mmm...” Edge complained, turning further into Stretch’s chest to escape the tickling fingers. Stretch laughed at that reaction, enjoying the way his husband’s shoulders shook by extension. “Stop...”

Stretch rolled onto his back, bringing Edge with him. The sleepy monster huffed, rearranging himself into a more comfortable position, cheek pressed against his husband’s chest. He blinked blearily, voice rough with sleep, “Why’re ya up?”

“It’s past 11, Babe,” Stretch placed a hand on Edge’s forehead, discreetly feeling his temperature, “That’s the third weekend I’ve been the one waking you up. I’m getting worried you’re coming down with something...”

Edge gave a dismissive snort, “M’fine, Honey Bear.” Stretch smiled at the pet name, rubbing circles on Edge’s shoulders and pulling him closer. It did nothing to soothe his frazzled nerves.

“Yeah? Then why are you so sleepy, hmm? This entire week, I’ve been the one waking you up for work. You don’t usually sleep through your alarms.”

“You’re a bad influence,” Edge teased, obviously more awake now, although he still didn’t lift his head. “You and your laziness. Blue warned me, but-“

“I’m serious, Pap,” Stretch persisted, grabbing his husband’s hand and threading their fingers together, “What if you’re getting sick? We should go see Undyne again-“

Edge made a face at that, “Stretch-”

Shaking his head, Stretch continued earnestly, “What if something’s wrong with you? What if something’s wrong with Pancake?”

Edge changed his position so he was resting on his elbows, almost like a cat. He maintained eye contact as he put his head back down, tracing lazy hearts over the sternum.

“The baby is fine. I am fine,” Edge said slowly and carefully, mouth quirking into an almost mischievous grin, “Since they are your child, it’s only natural they crave sleep. That’s a good sign.”

“Heh,” Stretch smiled briefly, resting his hands on Edge’s hips loosely. As much as that comment filled him with warmth, however, that sense of unease and dread was overpowering. “We still need to get it checked out. I don’t know what I’d do if anything happened to you.”

“If anything happens to me, you would adjust and carry on.” Edge sighed almost like he was disappointed, like that was the most obvious answer in the world. Like it didn’t make Stretch’s soul freeze at the mere thought.

“Don’t-“ His throat felt tight, a heavy and unpleasant feeling settling in his bones, “Don’t say that!”

“Why not? I’ve been a part of your life for 6 years and 4 months. I’ve only been a part of your daily life for 1 year and 8 months.” Edge was so blasé and frank about it, like he was talking about the weather or something. “It would be difficult and painful,” he cupped Stretch’s cheek as though that made this whole horrible conversation any better, “But you can do it. I know you can.”

“What are you even talking about?!” Were they having the same conversation? “I’m even more worried now, thanks, so we’re absolutely going to the doctor now. Even so, it’s probably not life or death-“

“Yes it is!” Why was Edge still going on this horrible tangent?! “Life and death are all part of the same thing! Gain comes with loss. I could die today, tomorrow, two years from now, or twenty. We all Fall Down someday. Actually, back home-“

“Edge,” Stretch grabbed his face, butting their foreheads together, more than a little desperate, “This isn’t Underfell! You don’t need to worry about dying anytime soon!” He let out a little, shuddering breath, thoroughly spooked, “Geez, how can you even be thinking about this now of all times-“

“Papí.” He recognized that tone of voice, oh no- “We cannot control what events come our way, but we can control our reactions-“ Edge cut himself off when Stretch hugged him a little too tightly, face burrowed in the junction between his neck and shoulder. He pet the back of his husband’s skull gently. “You never know what could happen, so it’s very important we have a plan.”

Stretch shook his head stubbornly, feeling the beginnings of tears as his soul seemed to thunder in his chest. He wasn’t going to think about it. He wasn’t going to imagine this. “No.”

Edge went quiet for a moment as though he was actually surprised by the strong reaction he was getting. Bastard. “Let me tell you what I want you to do when I dust, then-“

Stretch groaned as loudly as he could, voice starting to break, “You are literally killing me!”

His husband continued to stroke his back reassuringly. “Well, in the event of my murder, Red is going to avenge me, if necessary. You don’t need to worry about that.”

Stretch wanted very much to make a snappy and irritated remark, but found himself trying to regulate his breathing. This was such a stupid thing to be upset about-

“It’s very selfish, but I want you to keep wearing my ring, and if possible, sprinkle some of my dust on it. When you proposed, you told me you would be mine forever- so I’ll hold you to it.”

Stretch’s shoulders shook with the force of his head shaking, unable to articulate anything coherent. He wished this was just idle talk- a cruel and morbid prank- but he knew his husband was being serious. Edge continued to stroke his skull, using his other hand to hold him close.

“I won’t ask you to remain celibate or single, but remember, I own your heart. My ring always goes first. And if you DO end up with someone else, which you can, and maybe even should if Pancake outlives me, then-“

“Stop, stop!” Stretch gasped incredulously, feeling like he was going to burst into tears, “How can you possibly want to talk about that?”

Edge looked at him incredulously,  “It’s an important conversation we need to have. I have several plans for Pancake’s future, but I need your input first.” He pulled out three folders from his inventory. “The pink folder is in case we both die and it’s for our brothers. The yellow one is in case I die and it’s for you. The blue-”

“Oh my God, you’re gonna die-” It felt like a knife had been thrust into his soul, and he could practically feel Edge turn to dust in his arms. Why else would he have such detailed plans? “You’re gonna die, and leave me alone with Pancake-” His chest was starting to hurt, and it felt like it was getting harder to breathe as the waterworks started.

“I am not going to die! I’m fine!” Edge pulled him against his chest, alternating between patting and rubbing his back. He actually sounded alarmed now, “Why would I die now, when I have so much to live for? Don’t cry!”

Stretch tried to say something else, but it just came out as a watery blubber.

“I’m not going anywhere. I’m okay, Papa Bear.” Edge held him until he managed to get his breathing back under control. Maybe he didn’t have Edge’s soul reading ability, but it wasn’t hard to tell his husband was definitely spooked, “Why are you crying?” Edge brushed away the tear tracks gently, “This is a complete overreaction! I’m not going to dust from sleeping too long-”

Somehow, that little phrase cut through the haze of grief and Stretch saw red.

“I’M overreacting?!” Stretch sputtered in a rage, pulling away with an indignant huff, “You-! How dare you!”

He didn’t wait for Edge to answer, “I was just asking if you were coming down with a cold! You’re the one talking about death! I’m sorry I worry about you?! This whole death talk cruel and unnecessary-“

Edge flinched, pulling away, and Stretch was immediately filled with remorse.

“Babe, Sweetheart, love of my life, please,” Stretch wasn’t above begging, literally clasping his hands in supplication, “I didn’t mean it that way. Sorry.”  

This was a weird, bad awkward. Stretch kept talking nervously, “If you want to discuss the future, how about we look at the best and happy one! Like, how we want to decorate and furnish the nursery! Or look over at Blue’s baby shower theme and venue suggestions! Literally anything else, please, please.”

For a long moment,  Edge was quiet, something unreadable in his expression as he scrutinized his husband’s face. Finally, he nodded stiffly, “...Ok.”

Great. Now Edge was mad or disappointed in him, and he felt bad again-

“I’m sorry I upset you,” Edge said quietly, obviously considering his words very carefully, “If it makes you feel better, I will go and see the doctor.”

“No-“ Stretch sighed scrabbling at his face, “You’re right, I overreacted- you’re not dying, you’re just, like, utilitarian and morbid. Efficient and morbid?” He kept his hands over his face, not wanting to see Edge’s expression at that poor word choice. “Anyway, I know you hate the doctor, and I was getting carried away, so-“

“It’s fine.” Edge’s tone was still cautious and calm, and he quickly got out of bed. Stretch only lifted his hands to look up at his husband when he felt the gentle weight of a cellphone on his chest. “You should-“

“Are you mad at me?” Stretch sat up quickly, cellphone tumbling to his chest as he caught Edge by the wrist. “I’m sorry- I know this sort of conversation is important and you meant well, so I didn’t mean to be dismissive or anything. I’m sorry I didn’t react well, but you just caught me off guard-“ The words just started tumbling out, a roiling sense of unease that was making his anxiety spike, “And then talking about Pancake like that was just a little too much for me! I mean, they aren’t even born yet and you’re already prepping for a future where you’re not there and I just- I can’t even begin to even think about a future without you and I can’t fathom having them but not you so I just panicked-“

“Papí.” Edge’s tone was firm but warm, taking his hands with a squeeze that was too tight to be pleasant. It sure got him focusing on that instead of his frenzied thoughts though. “You need to calm down. We’re done talking about that.”

He let go of his husband’s hands only to move onto the phone, “You will call the doctor and set up an appointment for Thursday morning. Then you will come downstairs and we’ll have brunch.”

“I love you.” Stretch buried his face in his husband’s ectostomach as he threw his arms around Edge’s waist. “I’m so sorry-“

“Why? I made you cry.” Edge’s tone was warm and he rubbed his back fondly. “I’ll make you a Coolada-” Edge stopped himself. “Maybe tea would be better. I’ll add some honey. And I’ll make some of those grit things you love so much, with extra butter to it this time. We’ll also have eggs and toast and… Uh...”

Why didn’t Edge include any Underfell dishes in that line up? Edge wouldn’t eat the grits or eggs, and he almost always made Greempanadas when he was in a Brunch mood...

“Whatever else you want.”

This was backwards. Edge had a very definite uneasy tension in the way he was carrying himself, and Stretch should be comforting him. He didn’t have a reason to be this discombobulated. “But-“

“Call her, and then come down when you’re ready,” Edge was stern, as though he could read his mind, pulling away and making his way to the door. He paused at the door jamb, looking over his shoulder, “It’s fine. Stop agonizing over this.”

Stretch watched him leave, trying very hard not to agonize. He had obviously offended/hurt Edge with that comment, to the point his husband was backing off anything related to Underfell. That wasn’t what he wanted at all, but how was he supposed to turn this around? Edge, understandably, didn’t want to talk about it anymore…

Right, Edge was the kind of guy who appreciated actions over promises and words. Thursday, ok. That would give him several days to show Edge... something. But what? [ Start of Phase II: ███████░░░░░░░ 50% ]

[sheusedtobesassier]

Day 10,115

001. We’re Brangelina, but he’s Angelina because of their unconventional beauty and I’m Brad because of the fur coat he wears in Fight Club.

002. The day we laid in his bed and he told me about his “one that got away” who was really somebody he tried to be with for a long time until she got hurt in a way that I think was hard for both of them to understand.

003. Watching him giggly dance like animated Kermit with Janelle and Genevieve.

004. It’s the way he smells that keeps making me cry. Grabbed his lumpy leafy pillow, but not the other two ugly tropical Christmas pillows because I never liked those. Mm but I keep breathing deeply into the one. Earthy and clean and unlike anything else. Or maybe it’s the way humans smell and he’s just the only one I’ve been so close to. The only one I’ve ever breathed in. I think it upsets me so much because the pillow won’t smell like that forever. Because I’ll forget how he smells. That’s really really upsetting. So every time it does still smell like that I’m startled and relieved but still so upset. Still fresh. Will not stay fresh.

005. The day Kiersten and I quietly sat across from each other while she drew henna on my hand. I asked her if she’d seen us the other night, sitting in his parked car in the rain. She raised her eyebrows because we both knew she had. She said softly without looking up, “I think you two are cute together.”

006. How he’d ask me “Who even are you?” when I was wilding. He would shake his head and say, “You’re really on one.”

007. We talked about death a few nights ago. I talked about how it’ll be a relief to me when life is over and he talked about how that made no sense to him at all. How it felt so important to him, not the dying but the being alive. How he needed to do something important with it. I said it made him more ambitious and more prone to disappointment. It really explained so much.

008. A couple weeks ago I caught me thinking about who would be our flower girl and ring bearer if we ever got married.

009. Passing my water bottle back and forth 100 times on a drive or just getting back or when he would stop by after he got done working or MOSTLY after we’d messed around because we’d worn each other out. Splashing him because I liked to watch him get mad and have to calm himself down. Mm. Telling him to finish it and feeling small joy that I’d been able to meet his need.

010. The night I just watched him doodle things. He doesn’t draw pretty things. He draws strange things that make sense to just him. Unexpected.

011. His face when he would get sleepy or when he’d first wake up. I called it puffy and he didn’t like that but I meant puffy in the sweetest most darling way.

012. I woke up at five o’clock this morning and never fell back asleep. That’s literally never happened to me. I hope it doesn’t last very long because it’s extremely frustrating to not be able to escape, extremely frustrating to be inside my own head currently. Just snapped out of the middle of a safe dream and right away started thinking about him. Goddamn I cannot wait for mornings I wake up thinking about anything else.

013. I don’t want to talk to anybody else right now. Like actually maybe can’t. Just him. Talking to literally anybody else is disappointing. Being around anybody that isn’t him feels so fucking lonesome. Would rather be alone. Would rather take care of me than have anybody else try it. Just him. Don’t want it from anyone else.

014. He never watched my favorite movie.

015. Got me searching for photos of monarch butterflies as I hold back tears.

016. Mm, about to become super fucking conscious of how many spaces I’m in consist of only white people. So many white people. Too many white people. Damn.

017. I think the whole time we were in love he couldn’t stop mentioning Solange’s album. The first time I listened to it I didn’t like it and then I only ever heard it with him after that. Will probably never like it now.

018. The one evening in the Lodge during the first summer. I was stressed out completely, a low 2 on a scale of 1 to 10. He said we could get in his car and he’d drive me anywhere. I told him I couldn’t because of something coming up on the schedule. Mm but I let him put his arm around me. I didn’t fight that. And I let anybody see us as they left dinner and decided not to give a fuck because I was so sad and I liked him so much.

019. I txted Edith and Caleb right before lunch today to let them know what happened. That made me cry. Yeah I won’t be able to write about the sweet moments we’ve had with them right now but I hope I don’t forget them.

020. Prayed the other night that God would help me protect the memories, like to please help me hold onto them, help me be discreet and not let everybody in on them, but I also asked Him to protect me from the memories for at least this first little while. To not let them devastate me. Mm yeah I’m putting a lot of effort into backing up from the things I suddenly remember about him, about us. Cannot wade in too far.

021. He said my issues with my dad were Big Fish. He might be right.

022. He showed me his father on Facebook a couple weeks ago. A whole bunch of his family but yeah wow we came across his dad. Mm. I didn’t say anything because I felt like I shouldn’t. I couldn’t believe he showed him to me.

023. He loved Fat Thor so much, like not in just a make him laugh way, in like a serious meaningful way. He like lol, he deeply understood Fat Thor.

024. It makes me very very very very sad to think that I probably won’t get to make him laugh for a long time, maybe never again. That hurts. I do love when he laughs hard.

025. When we told Bill and Renate. Mm. Bill started asking reasonable questions, ones I hadn’t asked because they’d seemed too obvious but were helpful to hear out loud. But Renate. Mm. That’ll make me cry. Renate just immediately seemed so sad, like so physically saddened. And I think maybe that’s been the kindest moment of this whole thing. The kindest to me anyways. I love her and I really believe she loves me, loved the two of us together.

026. We stayed at Carlsons’s on Thursday night. Their old mattress on their living room floor. Got in a goofy fight right before we fell asleep because Beans had snuggled into Omar’s legs and he was whisper yelling at me not to bother the cat and so I chucked his phone. When I tattled to Bekah the next morning he said, “I fell asleep before I could be nice.”

027. Next time I order sweet tea in a drive thru I know I’ll cry about it.

028. Strawberry tea. He wanted milk in it, but didn’t take any because he didn’t want to offend June’s sensibilities. Mm. I do love him for the ways he would show June respect. He surprised me.

029. The night he got Depop and scrolled forever.

030. I’ve been wearing the earrings Dad gifted all us girls for Christmas since it happened. Keep putting them on as like, a defense. A comfort. A reassurance. A reminder that I’m loved by others outside of this mess.

031. OOH, the itty bitty whozit whatzits he made out of tiny scraps he came across when he was a janitor at that factory. Small faces.

032. The way he was around Elliott.

033. How he reminded me of Dan AND Zion, somehow combined into a troublesome dreamy wonder boy.

034. It’s going to be really hard to do the things we all usually do together without him. Morning devos, eating meals, prepping/cleaning up for them, and cleaning cabins.

035. He’s just my best friend. My actual closer to me than anybody maybe ever best friend. And I don’t know how I’m supposed to just keep being a person if he isn’t going to be somewhere close by. I don’t know how to feel so far away from somebody I love this way. I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know.

036. He was saying last week that like, saying that his greatest fear in all this is that people are going to believe he doesn’t care about me um that I’m going to believe that. And mm, I’m really trying to not let that BS into my head. Trying to believe he would of stayed if he could of. That there was no other option for him. Not one that he could fathom. But it’s hard. It’s hard to put he cares and he left next to each other and understand both.

037. Seeing anybody else kiss makes me painfully aware that I don’t know if we’ll ever kiss again. An uncontrollable pang.

038. Marriage is now gonna be so stupid upsetting to me.

039. Had to edit his contact in my phone from Cool Boyfriend™ to Omar. Mm, I know I’m Ang<3lla in his, something like that. Wonder if/when he will change it.

040. Waiting for him to reach out to me. Can’t talk to him first. Could actually but won’t. If he misses me he should do something about it. Mm but I know it’s not in his nature. Like he’s more likely to say nothing, to not bother me, to let me have the space I need to take to feel okay. That’s what he will consider it. He probably won’t fathom what I consider it. To me it will feel like him being fine without me. And that is something I cannot prove wrong, only he can. If he wants to. If it’s even possible to prove it wrong. To me it feels like a clean cut, like him seeing this as a part of his life that is over now. I do not want it to be over, so if that’s not what he wants I hope he does something about it. Because if he doesn’t do anything, I’m going to take his silence as disregard. I’m going to let him carry on as I try to too.

041. Went to lay in his Prayer Chapel to mourn his going but once I got there I didn’t want to. It was just an empty room. I told it so. “You’re just an empty room he isn’t in anymore.”

042. I will miss what he has to say about God. His questions and his realizations. I will hear other people talking and know what he might say. I will not say it. He would say it better than I ever could.

043. I read his note to Steve. Couldn’t help it. Said something at the end about how he hopes he can come back someday? To Sky Lodge? When he can contribute? I might of killed him if he’d written that in his note to me. Would have had a hard time forgiving him for a scrap of hope. The current silence is a relief because while it isn’t what I would choose it is what I expected. Nice of him behave how my insecurities told me he would.

044. I’m not angry, but if I am it’s because sadness is debilitating and anger gives you somewhere to put the knife.

045. Reading a book on my tummy while he lays his head against my back and plays with his guitar. The sun is shining and nobody cares how close we are except for us and we like it.

046. The stupid fucking rap dance he does when he’s got headphones in. Muted mouthing the words to something cool I probably don’t know.

047. Mm. Soon comes the torturing myself with imagining what it might be like if he surprise came back. If he crawled into my bed like he’d never woke me up from it, never rushed told me he was there to say goodbye, never kissed me before my eyes were really open. He was struggling and started to walk to the front door then turned back around to hold me again to tell me how hard this was and that he loved me? That he loved me so so much? And then he actually left. And I don’t want to describe what I did then because it was fucking awful and I hope I forget about that morning completely. I hope I forget it and replace that part of my head with a sweet fucked up pretending what it could be like when the part of him that loves me so so much convinces him to crawl into my bed. Holding onto the hope that part of him exists.

048. I read his love note again last night and made it through without crying. Already. Just two days have passed and part of me is already harder than I thought it could be. I’m going to resent that note soon if the silence continues. I’m going to hate it for what it says. If you love me then where are you?

049. Jess just asked if I would come over for supper and I said no. Said I couldn’t wait to be in my bed. She seemed hurt but then said, “Can I bring you supper or do you have food in your house?” So I tearfully said that would be nice because it would. This is what I mean. How do I let anybody else take care of me that isn’t him? How the fuck does one go on?

050. I’m glad that he will not be so far away from his mother anymore. I’m so so glad for that.

[allofthisnonsenseplease]

An R76 fic idea from Firesonic152 and me. =) We thought the concept was worth sharing. Sort of an urban or modern fantasy story where the SEP was intended to increase and focus magical potential in order to create animal familiars.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 magical AU where SEP was a program for concentrating and stabilizing excess magical potential into summoned creatures. The creatures are highly empathetic to their humans, often directly responding according to the person's emotional state. The odd thing is, Jack's seems to like Gabe FAR more than it does Jack.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 OH NOOOOOO jack's is a feline creature and gabe's is a neato owl ooo what if jack just straight up had a LION THAT WOULD BE COOL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Jack plays it off for the longest time as just his MASSIVE CRUSH on Gabe (which it is, in part) and it's only later that Gabe realizes that Jack straight up doesn't like himself. Gabe has seen Jack's critter hiss and slash at him when Jack was feeling particularly down, and a few inquiries tell him that none of the others have ever done that to their humans.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 jkefnajkfdkfnj

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 I do like the lion idea. ^^ Or possibly a tiger with stripes that almost look more like scars marring its body

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 what about a STRIPED LION or a lyger that's a thing right BUT THAT'S REALLY UPSETTING AKJDFNAKFNJ jack makes a Really Big Mistake (tm) and his cat straight up attacks him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 i want to say that a lyger is a thing -'.'- It's pretty much the only time that it's ignored Gabe. Usually, it would be all up on him, looking for pets and purring, but it focused on Jack for once with hugely upsetting implications.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 it's big too, and heavy, and it knocks jack right down and pins him with its huge paws and snarls in his face it's always been on the aggressive side but not like this luckily they're able to fight it off before it can do any lasting damage. but gabriel is terrified by how close it came to ripping out jack's throat. AHH what if it gives jack the scars on his face??

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 ouo perfect Jack can barely look in a mirror for the longest time afterward without his familiar starting to get its hackles up as the self-hatred kicks in

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 qoq while jack recovers in the med bay, his familiar seeks out gabe and presses into his side, tired and making low strangled noises AHH BUT WHAT DO THEY NAME THEM i hate this but gabriel absolutely names his owl Dr. Hoo i'm s o akdjfnadf

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 X'''''''D omfg yeah Have Jack let Gabe name his. It keeps insisting on seeking Gabe out, and Jack's finally just 'hey, you name it.'

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 kdjafnadkfj jack kept refusing to name it before gabe tries to insist that it's jack's, he should name it, but jack shrugs and points out that it only ever sleeps in gabe's room that or pressed up against gabe's door hmmmm what's a good name for a lyger

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Beans. or Kernel. i dunno XD

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 LOL hobbes

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 OMG YES THAT ONE

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 :smile: hobbes and dr. hoo are friends awww but omg jack had been doing a swell job of keeping his Feelings for gabe on lockdown before this but hobbes ruins all his efforts

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 You know what's gonna make it even worse for Jack, is that this is all experimental, so there's gonna be all sorts of evals and questions and what not trying to figure out why his is the only one acting different from all the others. lol

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 OH NOOOO everyone else's familiars are getting along just fine qoq but awwww hobbes pretty much immediately glues itself to gabe's side and demands All The Belly Rubs

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 XD

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 gabe laughs while he's petting hobbes and says "damn you really like me this much morrison?" and he looks up to give jack a grin but jack's expression is blank

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 oooh...accidentally outed to your crush by your own uncontrolled magical familiar. that's rough, buddy.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AWKS

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Gabe: ...uhh, just a joke, Morrison. Feel free to laugh. Jack, unable to trust himself to even smile: Ha. Hilarious. I'm just...gonna...not be in here anymore. And Gabe thinks that he's insulted Jack or something, but it prolly can't be that bad, because Hobbes is getting even more needy, enough to keep Gabe from going after Jack.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ hobbes demands curling up in gabe's lap and it is Big so gabe can't really go anywhere LOL

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 AHH!! XD <3

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 it doesn't really fit in gabe's lap so it just kind of ends up sprawled across his legs and then dr. hoo decides to settle on top of hobbes' back gabe isn't going anywhere for awhile

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 lol HOPE YOU BROUGHT A SNACK GABE oh but Jack feeling so deeply lonely after he's made his escape. ; ; and Hobbes doesn't come for him the way the other familiars will usually come for their humans. Jack must have been thinking too much about Gabe when he first summoned Hobbes, and that's why it didn't turn out the way the others did.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ jack is curled up in bed with the lights out, wishing gabe was there, wishing things were different - and then he hears something knocking faintly at his door he drags himself out of bed and opens the door a crack to find dr. hoo staring up at him hobbes might not care, but dr. hoo is Very Worried and insists on snuggling up with jack

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 ;u; GABE WANTED TO CHECK ON JACK AND BE SURE HE WAS OKAY MY HEART

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 YEAH QOQ

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 OH!! What if, when they started the program, the familiars were meant to be...like, little more than magical automata--nothing with feelings, just constructs that could be ordered around? and so there wasn't extensive psych testing beforehand, which is how Jack got cleared for the program and by the time they start to realize what they've created, it's too late. there is a huge, fuck off, magic incarnate liger that may well bite its handler's face off if Jack gets too depressed

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 OOOOOO BOY WHAT A MISTAKE TO MAKE

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 YEAH NO KIDDING What if one of the batch was a straight up psychopath?

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 JESUS well it is the military s o

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 should have checked more thoroughly~!

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 but like the more frustrated jack gets the more aggressive hobbes gets which just becomes a vicious cycle when he's trying to get hobbes to cooperate with him that is and hobbes keeps not cooperating

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 although, it only gets scary aggressive with Jack or enemies. Like, every once in a while, Hobbes will growl at someone Jack is SERIOUSLY angry at, but it doesn't generally start fights...except with Jack. Gabe eventually learns that if Hobbes leaves his side, then he needs to be right on its heels to be sure Jack hasn't fallen into a bad depression again. There have been a couple of false alarms, but Gabe isn't at all willing to take the chance.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 what if gabe gets injured by someone and hobbes becomes Murderous jack takes a bullet and hobbes gets pretty angry but gabriel gets hit with something and hobbes becomes Vicious

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 omg yup Jack's immediate rage, the burning need to KILL whoever hurt Gabe--then afterward, Hobbes makes a nuisance of himself, refusing to leave Gabe's side and getting in the way of the medics.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 turns out it's very hard to treat someone when a Huge Fuck Off liger is growling at anyone who comes near said patient it's the one time jack is able to rein hobbes in and get it to listen to him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 What if Hobbes eventually starts putting forth a little bit of effort to work with Jack and not maul him after Gabe has a talk with it? Like Gabe sits down and holds Hobbes' face in his hands, and is like 'listen. Jack is...he's really important to me. I know there's more to you guys than just our emotions, and I know feeling what he feels has to suck. I'm gonna talk with him, see that he gets some help for that. But I need you to cut him some slack. I don't...I don't want to see him destroyed because he's his own worst enemy.'

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ when hobbes lets jack pet its head for the first time jack is dumbfounded

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Hobbes is surprised, himself. Jack is--just a little bit--happy. Jack: Gabe, look! He's--! Gabe, grinning and unsurprised: He and I had a little chat. Jack: You talk to Hobbes about me? Gabe: What can I say? He actually sees reason.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 hobbes very suddenly turns and licks gabe's face jack turns bright red

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 okayokay but like imagine big dumb laughing wrestling pile

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 njsdkjandkjandd dr. hoo always wins bc it waits until the last second and then settles on top of whoever is winning

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 they tire themselves out, and wind up laying around and partially on top of each other. Hobbes is purring like a landslide and has actually let Jack pillow his head on his flank. Gabe is propped up against Hobbes' shoulder, grinning and feeling something warm and wonderful in his chest to see Jack actually looking happy and relaxed

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QwQ dr. hoo is a puff on top of jack's head doing the cute owl squint

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Jack very slowly realizing that Dr. Hoo has been spending a lot more time with him recently. He looks over at Gabe, and something about his expression must have given his thoughts away, because he sees Gabe's smile soften, sees him shrug and nod, and Jack is still trying to process when Gabe reaches over to wrap an arm around his shoulders and tug him in close and ask Jack if he wants to grab dinner together.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ jack's "yes" is nearly lost with how loud hobbes is purring

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 okay, but now we get to the really important question of this AU: Does Hobbes know enough to make himself scarce when Gabe finally takes Jack to bed? XD

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 LMAO OR DOES HOBBES DO THE ANNOYING CAT THING AND IMMEDIATELY PUSH OPEN THE DOOR DEMANDING ATTENTION dr. hoo is chilling on hobbes' head this does not make it better

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 They sit at the foot of the bed and Watch. Intently.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 gabe decides very quickly that this is killing the mood and shoos them out (despite jack's whining that he doesn't care, just fuck me gabe)

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 XD Oddly enough, Hobbes is easier to convince than Dr. Hoo. Gabe's familiar seems to have developed more of a mother hen interest in Jack than Hobbes did for Gabe.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 gabe could swear dr. hoo is glaring at him giving him a "you better treat him right or else" look

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 lol Anytime things get even a little rough, Dr. Hoo HAS to be allowed in during aftercare. He insists on sitting on Jack's head or shoulders to cuddle him.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AWWW dr. hoo's favorite spot is nestled in against jack's neck

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Jack gets into the habit of absentmindedly feeding him little pieces of whatever he's eating. Dr Hoo being able to change his shape, maybe even more than the other constructs. He's like a little round rowlet most of the time, but he can become huge when necessary--big enough to shield Gabe with his wings, or fly with him in his talons.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 ooooooooooo LMAO jack is in danger and dr. hoo's spidey-senses go off and it immediately becomes Huge and swoops in, nabs jack gently with its claws, and flies away

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 lol and Jack's, like, cussing up a storm at him because he wants to go back and fight! At the same time, Hobbes gets extra aggressive and starts taking out enemies left and right.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 kjfsnkajfnadf dr. hoo doesn't listen, just carries jack straight to gabe and drops him in gabe's arms >w< gabe has to quick drop his guns bc OH GOD JACK IS FALLING

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 XD <3 Dr Hoo is the best wingman! X'''D

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 LMAO YEP dr. hoo not so discretely dropping lube into jack's hands bc it knows what gabe's thinking about XDDDDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 HA

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 cracks knuckles hello naughty children it's Angst Time as things are starting to get strained between them, dr. hoo actually snaps at jack - like, tries to bite his finger - for the first time ever.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 oh no OH NO ; ;

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 hobbes actually snarls at gabe on another day on a really bad day, when gabe tries to touch hobbes' head, hobbes takes a swipe at his hand and nicks him enough that it bleeds immediately after, hobbes tries to apologize, butting its head against gabe's leg, but it's not a good sign

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 oh oh shit, dude what if Hobbes actually hurts Gabe badly enough that there's talk of him needing to be, um, exorcised, or whatever the magical equivalent of putting one of them down is?

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 NOOOOOO

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 But nobody knows what that would actually do to Jack. All the candidates for the experiment had their magical potential ramped up to 11 so that it could be drawn out and given a physical form as a familiar. If Hobbes goes--if they can even get rid of him--what happens to Jack? Does the magic simply dissipate? Does he no longer have any magic? Does he overload and burn himself out from the inside? No one really has any concrete answers, and that's why they hold back for the time being, but some members of the research team are very curious. OH SHIT What if they go after Dr Hoo to find out?? And that's what causes the Zurich explosion??

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 NOOOOOOOOOOOOO

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 And Gabe, like, MERGES with him

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 but Gabe was seeking Jack out to try to tell him that something was wrong, that Dr Hoo was missing and he thinks it might have been the scientists and Jack needs to let him into the labs, but Jack was all 'you're being paranoid, they wouldn't, it's irresponsible, I'm sure he's fine--' then BOOM!!! And nobody is fine

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 KJSFASKJDNFASKFJAF hobbes physically drags an unconscious jack from the wreckage for days he's too exhausted and feverish to even hate himself. he and hobbes just curl up in a safe house together, wounded and brokenhearted

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 and one of the thoughts that keeps circling in Jack's head is that it's only because of Gabe that they can even comfort each other ;n;

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ hobbes is subdued after that. melancholy. jack feels weak and lost and utterly alone except for his familiar. every now and again a flash of anger will cut through everything and hobbes will bristle, but for the most part it's like he's in a fog .. AH what if the explosion made jack blind and he needs hobbes to help him with it

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 He's able to see through Hobbes, maybe? Although doing so comes at a price, maybe.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 he has to negotiate with all the self-hate and survivor's guilt welling up inside him, has to remain in control of it because he needs hobbes to listen to him in order to survive, and the only thing that keeps him going is the thought of gabe. the idea that gabe would want him to live. yeah!!! for the first time he feels like he understands hobbes. he feels like hobbes is an extension of himself instead of a manifestation of his darkest thoughts just waiting for the right time to attack. of course they'd been able to work together before, after a lot of effort, but now they truly become partners. all they have left is each other.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Q.Q I STARTED THIS AS A JOKE AS A HA HA JACK'S THIRST IS HIS MOST POWERFUL EMOTION AND CANNOT BE OVERRIDDEN AND NOW LOOK WHAT'S HAPPENED

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 DKAJNFAKJFN when he meets the reaper, hobbes recognizes him before he does reaper, of course, knows of only one huge fuck off liger

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 But Hobbes being unable to resist charging up to Reaper and knocking him over only to butt his head up against him and purr and purr Or if Reaper actually tried to take a shot at Jack, his own cloak would fan out like a giant pair of wings and encircle him, shielding Jack from himself.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 QOQ

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Makes it pretty hard to lie about how they feel lol

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 yeah XDD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 But while Reaper's got 'Jack still loves me', Jack has 'he doesn't actually want to hurt me.' Anything deeper is a mystery.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 qoq jack just lowers his gun and whispers "gabe?" reaper doesn't answer but hobbes seems to be convinced it is in fact gabriel. he hopes it isn't just because he wants it to be gabriel more than anything.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 He takes a peek though Hobbes' eyes and sees the magic woven inextricably with the flesh-and-blood man standing before him, and he recognizes the look of it for what it is--a familiar, something just like Hobbes. There's only one familiar Jack can think of that it might be. He's shaking and can't hold the connection that allows him to see through Hobbes' eyes. At the moment, it's all he can do not to sway on his feet or throw himself at Gabe.

Something nudges his leg. If he could see clearly, he would see the substance of Reaper's coat has dripped and stretched almost as if it had melted. A small portion of it rose up near Jack, round and feathered, rubbing affectionately against his calf. When Jack hears it coo, he kneels automatically, unable to stop the reflex despite the uncertain situation. He feels something hop onto his thigh and from there up to his shoulder, where a familiar sensation of soft feathers and shell-smooth beak nuzzles him. 'Dr Hoo...' He's smiling now, feeling tears well up because he's been given a miracle, and even if Gabe doesn't love him any more, even if Gabe hates him, at least Gabe's alive. That's all Jack's asked for since the explosion.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 SKJCNAEKUNAECJKAN

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Jack is just kneeling there, holding Dr Hoo as it cuddles him. He doesn't even try to look Reaper's way when he apologizes, ashamed by all the arrogance and anger years ago that had allowed him to ignore Gabe's pleas. He doesn't expect forgiveness. Reaper barely acknowledges his words, anyway, only orders him to get up, saying that kneeling there like that is unbecoming. Jack can almost laugh at that, and he says before he can stop himself that Gabe didn't used to complain about having him on his knees. Something hot and needy coils in his stomach, a familiar desire that has tortured him over the years. He didn't think he could ever feel it quite the same way again, and he hopes that Hobbes will behave enough not to give him away.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 BUT ANYWAY PREDICTABLY WHEN GABE IS CONCERNED HOBBES DOESN'T FUCKIN LISTEN TO JACK

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Hobbes is just trying to drag Gabe bodily to the nearest store where he can pick up the essential preparations bc Jack is needing to get rekt in the worst way

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AHAHAHA when gabe won't cooperate, hobbes gets frustrated and runs off alone

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Reaper sits down and starts griping about it to Jack, and Jack just shrugs and is all 'you were always better with him than i am' "He's born from your goddamn emotions, Jack!" "And that's ever made a difference...how?" "...there is not actually anything I could do to you that would be worse than what you've got going now, huh?" "Got it in one."

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 sksmsmcmdkx

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Hobbes comes back with stuff. Gabe takes one look at it and turns to Jack. 'I am NOT going to fuck you.' 'Didn't ask you to.' Gabe just looks pointedly at Hobbes, then back again. 'You know, I SWEAR we just had a conversation about how I can't control him.'

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 KJNAKJSCNASCJKN inside jack is like I SWEAR TO GOD HOBBES

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 while part of him is just OH GOD PLEASE MAYBE IF HOBBES TRIES JUST A LITTLE BIT HARDER It's a fukkin wonder Jack's crazy ass didn't end up with a hydra or something else with too many heads XD

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AHAHAHA hobbes is trying his damndest to butter gabe up purring and schnuggling jack is just thankful he's got a mask on

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 meanwhile, Dr Hoo just gives a sad little coo as Gabe draws him back in

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 awww qoq

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 ooh--slightly off topic, but what if Hana was a prodigy with magical stuff, got wind of the program, and was able to duplicate the results for herself, making her the only person who created a familiar outside of lab conditions.

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 AHHHHH NEAT she gets a bun

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 but, like, a big cartoony bun like her little avatar ^^

firesonic152 - 05/02/2017 YEAH :DD and hobbes Loves Her jack's never seen hobbes so affectionate with someone who isn't gabe

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/02/2017 Hobbes carries the bun around like its a baby kitten XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 CUTE

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Hobbes makes it very clear who is Family. haha just realized--Hobbes having another person to pay attention to means that Jack and Gabe will have it easier finding time alone lol

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 >:3c but lmao hobbes does all the courting for jack gabe constantly tells jack no, they shouldn't jump back into a relationship, and jack just blinks at him innocently and says he didn't ask anyway. but hobbes just keeps bugging gabe

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 XD every now and then, Jack will mumble 'good kitty' just within earshot of Gabe

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 XDDD hobbes tries to sleep in gabe's bed and gabe is like NO hobbes gives him really sad eyes

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 ohhhh noooooooooooooes!! XD who can resist the sad kitty eyes??

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 gabe grumbles and compromises. he lets hobbes sleep in the bed and he moves to the couch except when he wakes up hobbes is partially on top of him

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 XD JUST GIVE UP GABE YOU CAN'T WIN Gabe wakes up one night, and Hobbes is staring at him very intently. He remembers that Jack can use Hobbes' eyes, and demands to know if Jack's there, if he's watching or listening. Hobbes' expression doesn't change in the slightest, and Gabe eventually decides that he was probably thinking too hard. he relaxes a bit, though he's still a bit heated, and can't seem to get comfortable. He starts talking, partially to Hobbes, partially to sort out his thoughts, and partially to Jack who he had decided wasn't spying after all. He talks about how this whole situation is rough for him, too, how he wishes they could just go back to the way things were, but that that's not possible. He doesn't know what they have between them now, much less what they might have. He goes quiet and rolls over onto his side. After a stretch of silence, he says quietly that he doesn't know if he can give Jack what he needs.

That sets a pattern where Gabe starts talking to Hobbes before falling asleep. He doesn't know if Jack can hear him, if Hobbes can pass on messages or sensations. Some nights he hopes Jack never finds out. Some nights, he hopes that Jack does look in on him through his familiar, and those nights begin happening more and more frequently. He starts half-hoping that Jack will show up at his door. He starts wondering what he would do if it happened. He starts fantasizing about it. He wishes Jack would hurry up and come to him and take the decision out of his hands.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 QOQ

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Jack sends Gabe a text one night that just says 'we need to talk' and Gabe's heart stutters in his chest. He didn't expect it to hurt like that. But then, before he can start wondering what to do, a picture message follows. Jack has one hand free, but is largely covered by multiple tiny versions of Dr Hoo that seem to have separated from Gabe and swarmed him. His expression is horrible--caught between smugness, laughter, and anxiety, and Gabe can't help smiling at the picture as fondness over Jack's private awkwardness comes back to him in a rush.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 AHHHHHHHH after gabe sees the picture, all the mini dr. hoos just become MORE affectionate

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Jack texts him again after a couple of minutes without a response. 'pretty sure you saw those messages. are you coming here or do i need to come to you?' Gabe is halfway to the door before he stops and thinks. Isn't it still too soon? He picks up his phone and texts back 'Not yet.' A moment later and there's another message from Jack. 'ok' and then, just after that: 'i still love you. never stopped. good night.' Hobbes winds around his legs, butting his head up against Gabe, and he can't tell if the liger wants pets or is trying to simply offer affection.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 qOq at least jack gets to sleep swarmed with mini owls even if gabe isn't ready yet, jack can at least take comfort in this

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 they reek of him when they pile back into Gabe later, and it is distracting as all fuck

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 KAJFNAENAKC gabe is so ready to jerk off but hobbes is Right There

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 lol Jack might actually scold him for that. XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 of course when hobbes finally decides to return to jack, he smells like gabe too jack convinces hobbes to sleep in his bed for the night so he can pretend, just for a little.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 ; ;

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 in the morning, hobbes bolts off to find gabe and starts tugging frantically at his shirt gabe is too tired to fight off a Huge Fuck Off liger. he goes. hobbes leads him to jack's room, where jack is still asleep, curled around the space where hobbes was hobbes nudges at gabe's leg gabe is tired. he sighs and lays down next to jack.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 aaaaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 when jack wakes up, he's wrapped up in gabe's arms. he fell asleep too. hobbes is sprawled across their feet, purring happily. a few little owlets are strewn about, some nestled against jack's neck or behind his knees or in his hair, a few burrowed in hobbes' fur, and one perched on gabe's shoulder. (jack can't see them of course, but he can feel them buzzing and cooing happily.) jack hasn't cried in years but suddenly he finds his face is wet.

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Gay. XD That was very sweet. <3

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 <333333 gabe wakes up to jack crying quietly and gets really worried for a sec but then jack manages a weak smile and it's been such a long time since gabe has seen that expression on jack's face

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 also consider: Jack's body reacting to the warmth of Gabe pressed so close while he's still asleep, so even though Jack is so, SO happy, he knows that if Gabe wakes up to that reminder of what they used to be to each other, it'll only make things awkward. He can't calm himself down, though, so he tries to sneak out of bed without waking Gabe. It doesn't work, of course, so Gabe wakes up not only to see Jack's cheeks striped with tear tracks, but also that he's trying to sneak away.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 AKJNAKAJFN NOOOO god damn you and your unquenchable thirst jack //shakes fist

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 hey, he can't help waking up with a bit of him standing at attention. XD at least he was TRYING not to make Gabe have to deal with it.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 XDDDDD gabe wonders briefly if he should just pretend to be asleep and let jack go but then he decides that he's done too much of letting jack go

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017

He reaches out and grabs Jack's wrist, yanking him back so that the mattress bounces as Jack sits down hard on it. Jack mutters that he was just going to find some privacy, but Gabe shoots back that it's nothing he hasn't seen before. He stretches, moving his hand from Jack's wrist to his shoulder and practically dragging him back down. 'Just take care of it,' he mumbles as he fits himself against the line of Jack's body once more. 'I'm not going anywhere.'

Gabe's got one arm around Jack's waist and his face pressed against the back of Jack's neck as Jack hesitantly begins stroking himself. He squeezes a bit tighter, tucks his knees in a little closer, and those small movements are enough to let some of the tension drain out of Jack's shoulders. Gabe nuzzles closer, breathing deeply. He'd forgotten the scent of Jack's skin, but it washes over him in a warm wave, and soon Jack isn't the only one needing a release. For the moment, though, Gabe lies still, just holding Jack, breathing him in, savoring the tiny shivers of friction as Jack's ass rubs up against him. He listens to the quiet noises Jack is making, curls tighter around him as Jack turns his face into his pillow to muffle himself. Gabe is kissing Jack's neck before he knows what he's doing, and the sounds spilling from Jack's lips have resolved into the syllables of his name, muted but intelligible. By the time his hand strays down into Jack's boxers, he's almost too late. Two strokes and Jack finishes with a groan, stiffening against him before sagging limp against his chest, breathing a little quicker than normal. The smell of sex mingles with the scent of Jack's skin and scalp, familiar and not unwelcome. They wipe their hands off against the sheets before Gabe settles his arm around Jack once more, hand over the beating of his heart. He smiles as Jack reaches up to twine their fingers together, and murmurs that it's good to be home.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 AHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THAT WAS SO SWEET WTF

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 i am powered by unhealthy amounts of sugar XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 then jack smirks, shifting his ass against gabe teasingly, and says "i see i'm not the only one who needed to be taken care of." gabe hums and complains that he's comfortable and doesn't want to move jack says "me neither" and just keeps rubbing up against gabe god damn tease

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 lol JACK DON'T GET AHEAD OF YOURSELF THIS IS A DELICATE BALANCE YOU'VE ACHIEVED HERE

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 HE'S TOO THIRSTY in the end they are interrupted bc hobbes is really feeling the overwhelming affection and demands cuddles by plopping in right between them

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 lol Hobbes may appear to be a cockblock, but he's actually the best long term wingman  XD maybe stops Jack from going too fast

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 yep >w< plus who can be mad when there's a giant cat half sprawled on top of you

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 heehee ^^

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 gabe gives hobbes a little smooch bc wtf so cute and jack pouts but he's too comf to even be salty I JUST LOVE GABE BEING SCHNUGGLY W A HUGE FUCKIN CAT just buries his face in hobbes' fur

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Jack's old jealousies, which had been knocked over the head and buried in a shallow grave, come clawing out of the earth looking for a fight XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 XDDDDDD hobbes growls quietly at jack and jack rolls over to glare sightlessly

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Gabe: Hey, you know what's NOT sexy? A couple hundred pounds of angry magical cat on my chest. Knock it off, Jack. Jack, gracing Gabe with a glare of disdain on par with the haughtiest of cats: He started it.

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 XDDDD jack u petty motherfucker hobbes licks gabe's face. at that jack gets up, moves around them, and snuggles up behind gabe. much better XD

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 Gabe is some sort of horrible Jack sandwich XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 <333 surrounded by cute little owlets

SuspiciousPopsicle - 05/03/2017 sprinkled with cute little owlets. peppered with cute little owlets. garnished with a dash of cute little owlets. XD

firesonic152 - 05/03/2017 owlets are a spice

[whenlifegivesyourottenpears]

i miss my dog

I had the best dog from middle school till I was a freshman in high school. Her name is Amelia. My mom adopted her for me, she was previously owned by another family. She would flinch a lot so we assumed that she was possibly hit by the owners before. It took a while for her to get comfortable with us, but within the first night of having her at the house she grew to like me and would follow me around our house like a cute little duck. 

I was able to spend an amazing 5 years with her. I was able to have snuggles with her. I was able to tell her everything and never once did she judge me. When I was sad or anxious she was always there beside me. Then in the middle of my freshman year in high school I left to go to boarding school, and despite my siblings back home telling my mom that they would take care of her, my mom still told them no and gave her away. When I found out it felt like a piece of me left. Sure I wasn’t around anymore anyways, but I was still comforted knowing that I could come home on visits and see her. All those memories are just that, memories, in the past and our story together has stopped. I don’t know who adopted her next, I don’t know if shes still alive, if she is alive is she happy? I hope she is not with annoying children who like to pick on her, like the neighbor girl living in the apartment next to the one I’m in.

 Millie (a nickname that I always called her) is really picky, tbh she is really high maintenance and sleeps like a cat. Then other times she would run around in the yard or in a circle really crazy fast inside the house. It was so cute and funny. As she was getting older she started to get more seizures, and they really scared me at first, I didn’t know what was going on. But after she would stop seizing she would be like the first time I even met her, really timid, scared and wanting to hide underneath my legs. At first I didn’t comfort her, I was scared and didn’t know what to do, but now I wish I would’ve been there for her better when things like that happened. Millie had the cutest little jackets and hoodies we put on her, she was just a small dog so at time the hood covered her eyes so she walked around aimlessly, of course we wouldn’t let her go around like that but when she sneezed the hood would go right back on that little head of hers. Amelia also really hated the cold, in the winter she wouldn’t go potty outside unless I picked her up and set her out in the grass and stayed until she was done lol. She always laid in bed with me, under the blankets, with only her little nose poking out from underneath... it was adorable. After having her for a couple of years we got a cat, well my sister got a cat, and he is crazy but also really lazy and they would sleep near each other (My sister still has her cat). Then my other sister got a dog, he was also so cute, he was a small dog like Millie but he was a few years younger and really rowdy. I had never seen Amelia have so much fun before,at first she acted like she didn’t want him there. Millie would be sitting on the couch and have one paw crossed over the other, all sophisticated (she wasn’t like that until Jasper - my sisters dog - came, I think she was just trying to act cool), and while just minding her own business Jasper would come and attack her - playfully of course - she would just let him jump around or bite her ear and she would just play it cool. It was kinda cute though. Eventually she warmed up and loved to play, run in circles, and sleep with Jasper, they were best friends. 

Sadly after I went to boarding school Jasper got ran over by a speeding car, my sister was really upset about it, I wonder if Amelia was sad about Jasper leaving. 

I hate to think that Millie is with a family who is rude or upset because she can be really annoying or high maintenance. No one will ever love her more than I did, more than I do. I love the way the she would growl when I picked her up, because she was already so comfortable, but I would move her to come and sit with me. She hates to be alone, so I hope that the people who possibly have her now don’t make her stay in a room all by herself or in a cage. She’s a free spirit, living at her own pace, breaking the rules (she would squeeze through our gate and prance around the neighbors yard a lot - lol - in the moment it was pretty inconvenient but it really wasn’t that bad), and going with the flow. She loves to go on walks but is unpredictable, so I hope that the people who are her family now won’t be too surprised when they go walking with her and she decides shes done walking at any given moment :) I’ve carried her home a lot of times lol. By now, if shes not dead, she is probably about to reach “oldness,” now everyone says it’s never too late to teach a dog new tricks, right? Well Millie did not stand by that saying, which I was fine with, I didn’t care if she did’t sit when I told her too (unless I had a treat) I was just happy to have her with me and to let her do her own little thing. 

In a way I feel like when I got “sent away” (that sounds tragic-story-generic... anyways) my mom felt like she had to send away my dog also, Millie was a part of me anyways, because at first when I was away at home my mom missed me and I think she didn’t want a reminder of me around the house. Not that it would really matter anymore cause since I left home - it wasn’t on good terms with my family anyways - things haven’t been great not even good, well regarding my relationship with my bio fam. I still hold a lot of resentment towards my mom for giving my baby Millie away - she was with me in the good times and helped me through the beginnings of my toughest times, being lonely, feeling depressed, along with anything else you can think of. 

I love you Millie Billy, I hope you are doing well. I hope you live in a peaceful home, with a good sunny yard, and a nice gentle person to love you. I certainly hope that you’re not dead, but if you are then I’m praying you weren’t able to feel any pain. Thank you for always being beside me and sitting with me even when I was going through it. Thank you for putting up my loud voice and my used to be enthusiastic personality. I have never had a better best friend that you. I wonder what you would think of me if you saw me now? I’m always thinking of you and wishing I could give you a hugs and snuggles. :( I miss you and I love you. xoxo - your mom <3 

... i’m not crying, its just allergies.