#I think he’s trying to actually connect again

[wizard-of-interesting-failure]

"I don't understand. Why isn't he getting up?"

"Wh- you killed him!"

"Don't be silly, death isn't real."

"You cast Finger of Death!"

"I cast Lightning Bolt too; they name spells after fake shit all the time."

"Lightning is real too!!"

"Oh come on. Next you'll be telling me color is a thing."

"...have you ever actually been outside this cavern?"

"What's a cavern?"

"It's where we are right now!"

"Odd name for it, but yes, of course I have. Been this way, that way, through there is a lovely group of giant spiders..."

"We, ah. Might have killed those on our way here."

"Don't be silly, death isn't real."

"...right. Where do you think we came from?"

"Eh, somewhere. Weird shit shows up all the time."

"I-"

"Oh! Your friend there startled me and it totally slipped my mind; would you care for some tea? I don't drink it myself, but I keep some on hand for guests."

"...okay, listen. These are the Caverns of Chaos. Everything in here is self-replenishing. The prevailing theory was that they existed to protect a central chamber. We've spent weeks down here slogging through unimaginable horrors to make it there and you're going to, what, play dumb?"

"Okay now you're just being rude. I am not dumb! There might not be much to do around here, but I do my best to keep my mind sharp. I'd like to see you figure out as much as I have about the ever-shifting layout of the world!"

"We did! That's how we got here! Have you never tried scrying the outside?"

"Scrying spells are some sort of prank, best I can tell; they never seem to do anything except give me a headache."

"Cast one up."

"I don't really want to give myself a-"

"Just do it! At least 2000 meters."

"Alright, but I don't see...what..."

"..."

"...colors?"

"Yeah, the whole dungeon is monochrome for some reason, we think-"

"Lightning?"

"Well, if there's a storm, I suppose-"

"Death?"

"...death?"

"There's...more like your friend."

"What do you mean-"

"Why aren't they moving?"

"I don't-"

"I'm moving. I can move. See? They look like me. Why aren't they moving?"

"They're- there are skeletons? We just came from-"

"Am I going to stop moving?"

"No, you-"

"Why isn't your friend moving?"

"..."

"...he's...'dead'. Isn't he. I 'killed' him."

"...listen, just calm down, we can-"

"Oh, yes, of course! I could never figure out what these spells for making 'un-dead' were for, but they must be for fixing this! I'll just-"

"NO!"

"But he's-"

"We're handling it!"

"No you're not! Whatever you're doing, it's not working."

"How can you-"

"You're trying to draw power from something that's not there. I've done it a few times, don't feel bad, it's a common mistake."

"I'm drawing power from my goddess! There's no way she's..."

"What is a goddess? Is it that little symbol you're carrying around? It doesn't seem to have any power in it."

"...it...why can't I feel her?"

"Just let me do it, I can-"

"We're not letting you turn Steve into some kind of undead abomination!"

"Wh- but he wasn't dead before!"

"He was alive, you stupid thing!"

"Right, not dead. Un-dead. I'll just make him un-dead again and then we can..."

"Why has she forsaken me?"

"We can..."

"Why won't she answer??"

"Color...lightning...death..."

audible weeping

"They're like me...why aren't they moving?"

"It's probably just the Caves messing with the divine connection, we should-"

"Should I not be moving?"

extended wailing

"Is un-dead not like 'alive'?"

"Listen, I know we didn't have this problem before, but-"

"Is there something wrong with being un-dead?"

"OF COURSE THERE IS, YOU STUPID UNDEAD THING! STEVE IS DEAD, THE GODDESS WON'T LISTEN TO ME, AND YOU'RE JUST...just..."

"...just what?"

"..."

"What am I?"

"..."

"WHAT AM I???"

the cavern shakes

"Listen, just calm down, we'll-"

"Why is he dead? Why are they all dead?"

"All wh-"

"The ones you made me scry on!"

"Oh my god, we forgot about-"

"Why aren't they moving??"

"We don't know! What else did you see?"

"Colors, lightning, death..."

"What else??"

"Colors, lightning, death..."

the lich collapses into a fetal position, rocking back and forth

"Listen, this is important, you need to-"

someone attempts to shake the lich. A sudden pulse of darkness slams them into the opposite wall.

"Colors, lightning, death..."

"Just calm down, we can-"

"GODDESS? WHERE ARE YOU??"

"Colors, lightning, death..."

the party leader buries her face in her hands. The healer weeps and wails. The lich, seemingly catatonic, continues mumbling to himself. This goes on for a while.

"..."

"Right. Okay. That's enough of this. We're taking Steve's body and leaving. We wouldn't have a chance against a lich in this state anyway. Keep trying to revive him as we go, we'll-"

"...lich?"

"Yes, yes, you don't know anything about anything, it's very funny, har har, we're done here. Go back to giving yourself headaches or whatever it is you do all day."

"I'm coming with you."

"...what?"

"You know what I am. You know about places that aren't 'caverns'. You know about colors, lightning, and death. I need to come with you."

"No offence, buddy, but you don't exactly seem like adventuring material."

"Please! Don't you need to find out why all those people are...'dead'? I can speak with dead, I guess, if it's a real thing."

"..."

"We are not taking this THING that killed Steve with us!"

"...we probably are going to need help with whatever is going on up there."

"He might be lying!"

the party leader gestures at the utterly guileless lich. The healer turns away.

"...fine."

"Thank you."

"Just...keep him away from me."

The party improvises a stretcher as the lich gathers up his meager possessions. A thick silence reigns as the group shuffles out the only exit, the lich awkwardly following at a distance.

"Wait, I forgot my maps-"

"We'll be fine. Just stay back there, okay? You've caused enough trouble for one day."

Nodding hesitantly, the lich steps over the threshold, leaving his cavern for the last time.

It turns out that the lich the adventurers had been hired to slay had never actually killed anyone before until the impulsive paladin of the group swung first. Now, as the healer tries to revive them, the rest have to calm the ancient undead mage down from what is undeniably a panic attack.

[diminuel]

I saw your wanted poster for baby rocksgate but it’s actually smth I considered if the theory abt crocodile being xebec’s kid were canon. Like what if post-god valley incident, a poster for a 6 y/o crocodile was released but he was like born with a different name so no one ever made the connection? I wouldn’t be surprised given that the world gov clearly doesn’t have a problem with putting bounties on children. I’d love to hear your thoughts on that. It could be a part of the blackmail Iva has on crocodile maybe? Like they could’ve encountered each other at the battle

Yeah, there definitely would be a bounty on the kid, because the Marine can't go through the dead on God Valley and make sure Rocks' offspring is really among them. They might have had reports but some people got away, including members of Rocks' former crew.

I think otherwise Crocodile wouldn't try so hard to erase all traces of his past if there wasn't a danger.

(I'm cutting off the name but I've already said what it was in another post *lol*)

As to Iva, yes I think they've met each other on God Valley but while that might give Crocodile an incentive to look for them again at one point, it might also want him to stay as far away as possible. Because everyone who knows him from back then is a potential deadly liability. He cannot be recognized. Though I think once Iva is part of the RA he might be a bit less mistrustful considering the RA is anti WG, so there's a chance they won't sell him out. (But maybe he'll still collect enough blackmail material on the RA ahead of meeting them just in case.)

[suugarbabe]

Mom (can I call you mom?) I need a DISGUSTING AMOUNT OF FLUFF like I need kisses YEARNING HOD THE YEARNING!?!??!?!!!!???! I'm talking DIABOLICAL angst “did you touch her?” WOUND CLEANING DESCRIPTIVE CUDDLING AND AND MOM AND I NEED MAYBE LITTLE SMUT WITH EITHER SIRIUS BLACK OR LORENZO BERKSHIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm Gnawing at the bars of my enclosure scratching my skin begging you please your writing is my lifeline MOM FEED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!

hiii lovie! mom, mommy, mommy sab; all appropriate and approved 😌

thanks sm for the request! I haven’t written smut in a hot minute so I do apologize if it’s a little jank. otherwise here you go babes (I chose Enzie baby btw)

The feeling of Enzo’s nose nuzzling against your neck before his lips attached to skin was dizzying. Your senses overloaded with all that was him and as one of his large hands splayed across your back, pulling your hips flush to his while his other braced his weight against the corridor wall you were pressed against.

“Enz,” you gasped his name out as his lips attached to a particular sensitive area just beneath your ear. “Hmm?” He hummed against your skin, dragging his lips down your neck once more before finally pulling away and meeting your eyes. “I can’t help myself, baby,” Enzo’s voice was low, almost groaning out his sentences before burying his face in your neck once more, “I just wanna devour you in the hall.”

You let out a gasping laugh, knotting your fingers through his hair to pull him off you. The fuckers eyes rolled at the action, “Fuuuck, baby, love it when you’re not afraid to be rough in front of others.” His tone of slightly teasing, allowing you to push him back a step by his chest. “You’re ridiculous Enz, and we’re both going to be late.”

Enzo only smirked as he threw an arm around your shoulder as you both walked to your next lesson, “You know McGonagall actually loves me. she only gives that disapproving look to the people she cares for.” You shook your head with a grin, pushing his arm off your shoulder as you entered the classroom.

As you stepped away from his to head to your own table, Enzo grabbed hold of your wrist and pulled you back to his chest before grabbing your face and slotting his lips between yours once more. “I think that’s enough, Mr. Berkshire. You’re about hitting my limit of affection displays for the term,” Professor McGonagall firmly directed your boyfriend to his seat with a pointed finger.

Your cheeks burned red as you found your own seat a few tables in front of him. “Today we will be working in partners,” McGonagall’s began, quickly having any murmurs of the class turns to groans of complaint with her finished sentence, “that I have already chosen for you.” Thankfully you were not paired with anyone too disastrous; instead getting a very nice ravenclaw boy who was immensely helpful. Even showing you how to properly hold your want to get the incantation just right.

Which all really seemed innocent enough. At least in your mind. But on your way to dinner your heard it. That sharp change in Enzo’s voice that only comes out when his possessive side does. “I’ll ask you again, and for fucking Salazar’s sake you better have a good answer. Why were you touching what isn’t yours to fucking touch?”

You couldn’t see him yet, but it was quite easy for you to visualize; that little tilt in Enzo’s head when he’s asking a question almost mockingly. Because he doesn’t really care about the answer. He’s going to hurt them either way.

There was a small crowd formed around them; you had shoved your way through a few people just in time to see Enzo’s fist connect with the Ravenclaw’s face one, two, three times before you’re calling out to Theo and Matty to stop him.

Now Enzo was pouting on the edge of his bed, trying to keep his sour look while you dabbed a gauze over his split knuckles. “Hey, that hurts!” Enzo flinched his hand back with a hiss. You smacked the side of his thigh before grabbing his wrist and pulling his hand back towards you, “Stop being a baby, this is your fault you know! Beating on someone for no good reason. We need to get your jealousy in check.”

Enzo rolled his eyes at your words. You were having none of it, grabbing his chin and forcing his eyes to look at you, “Don’t do that.” He narrowed his eyes at you; you could almost see the gears turning in his brain to make some sort of smart ass remark. You really didn’t want a fight, even if it was half hearted.

You repositioned your grip on his chin, catching his off guard with a hand on his throat as you pull his lips to yours. He responded quickly, his hands going for your hips and pulling you to his lap. You braced yourself on his shoulders as he pulled you both further on to the bed.

You pushed back on his shoulders, Enzo taking the hint on laying back on the bed, pulling you with him. You braced yourself on either side of his head as you deepened the kiss, licking into his mouth as you ground your his down to his, causing you both to moan.

You trailed your lips across his jaw, over the skin of skin of his neck, “You know there’s nothing to be jealous of, baby…” Enzo let out a strained grunt as your teeth grazed his collar bone, your fingertips dancing along his sides causing his muscles to twitch.

“The only one I ever want is you, Enzie baby…maybe I just need to remind you how much I appreciate you, hmm?” You sat up, pulling your shirt over your head. Enzo’s eyes grew wide, his pupils dilating, iris’s growing darker. His hands were immediately on you, marveling at your bare skin, squeezing at your waist when your fingers began undoing his trousers, “Oh fuck baby, yeah?”

He raised his hips eagerly, allowing you to slide everything down his legs. You wrapped your hand around his cock while he helped you get them the rest of the way off, his eagerness nearly radiating off him as he laid down again.

You continued to work him with your hand as you kissed and nipped at his thighs, his hips bucking, begging for more. “Patience, baby,” you teased, biting and sucking at the meat of his thigh before soothing it with your tongue. Enzo opened his mouth for a smart remark but all words were lost as you chose that moment to drag your tongue up the length of his shaft.

“Fuuucking hell, baby,” you had barely gotten started and already he was praising you. You wrapped your hand around the base of his cock as you spit on the head, using your other hand to spread it along his shaft before wrapping your lips around him. Enzo let out a whine of a moan, and gods did he sound so pretty.

You started to bob your head, just shallowly at first, enough to get him worked up. Then you released with a pop, a gasp leaving his lips and almost a complaint before you took one of his balls in your mouth, tongue swirling over the sensitive skin as your hand still pumped his length, thumb swiping over the tip and making his thighs twitch.

You took the other side in your mouth, flattening snd lengthening your tongue to graze that sensitive patch of skin just before his hole that had his whole body jolting and his fingers lacing in your hair. “Holy fucking Salazar, fuck, baby you keep doing that and i’m gonna cum, but I need to be in your mouth, yeah? Please baby let me fill that pretty little throat of yours,” Enzo was practically whimpering, begging. And who were you to deny such polite requests.

You flattened your tongue again, letting him fill your mouth with his cock until you could feel him hit the back of your throat; then you pushed him a little further, testing your gag reflex and swelling around the head of his cock. Slurred expletives mixed with your name spilled from Enzo’s lips as you repeated the action. You dragged your nails along the side of his abdomen, feeling the muscles in his stomach twitch and you knew he was close.

You did your best to relax your throat, Enzo’s grip on your hair getting stronger and you allowed his full length in your mouth and down your throat, nose brushing his pelvic bone. “Oh gods oh fuck oh fuck, baby i’m cumming..i’m cumming, i-i’m cum-“ a string of whining moans left his pretty pink lips as he held his cock down your throat and filled your mouth before his grip on your head lightened.

You swallowed everything he gave you, making sure to drag your tongue up his length, licking his tip clean and smirking at the way his stomach twitched before releasing him from your mouth. Enzo’s chest rose and fell rapidly as you kissed up his stomach, over his chest and along his neck before connecting your lips with his.

He hummed into the kiss before pulling away slightly and cupping your cheek, “Mmm you know I can’t guarantee I won’t get jealous again..not when I know you can do that.” You smiled, brushing your knuckle against his cheek, “That’s okay, Enz baby. I’ll just have to remind you of your appreciating again.”

[julietsf1]

Home Again - Charles Leclerc x Reader

summary: eight years, one city, and a thousand unspoken words—will a chance encounter in London bring closure, or is there more in store for Monaco's golden boy and the one who got away? (4.5k words)

content: reunion, slight angst, unresolved feelings, childhood friends

AN: another Charles one! I felt like these tropes really suited his vibe, I hope you enjoy!! :)

____________________________________

London always felt like a city of paradoxes - chaotic yet calming, detached yet full of life. As I sipped my cappuccino at a small café tucked away in Soho, I let my mind wander. The same questions had lingered in my mind over the years, growing louder the longer I avoided them. Was it a mistake to leave? Should I have fought harder to keep in touch with him? With Charles?

I shook my head. No, leaving Monaco had been necessary. It was beautiful, yes, but it was like living inside a postcard, picture-perfect on the outside but so painfully hollow within. Everyone was constantly posturing, trying to outdo the next person in opulence, charm, or connections. It was exhausting.

And Charles… he was Monte Carlo personified in so many ways. Stunning, magnetic, the kind of person who made you feel alive just by being in his orbit. But there was something raw and real beneath that glossy exterior, something I’d always seen, even when no one else seemed to. I loved him for it. And maybe, in a way, I hated him too - for thriving in a place that felt like it would suffocate me.

The faint chime of the café door opening pulled me from my thoughts. I glanced up, expecting some trendy Londoner or a tourist fumbling with their map. But instead, my eyes landed on a familiar face, one I hadn’t seen in nearly a decade. Arthur Leclerc.

“Y/N?” His voice was incredulous, his eyebrows shooting up as he stopped mid-step. He looked exactly the same, just a bit taller, a bit sharper around the edges. Still the same boy I remembered from childhood, though, with that mischievous glint in his eye.

I blinked, unsure if I was hallucinating. “Arthur?”

He grinned, practically bounding over to my table. “Mon dieu, it is you! I wasn’t sure at first, but… wow, what are you doing in London?”

I gestured to my half-empty coffee cup. “Living here. What about you? I thought you’d be… I don’t know, in Monaco or racing somewhere glamorous.”

Arthur slid into the seat across from me without waiting for an invitation, his grin widening. “I was here for a sim session, actually. But you, London? I thought you’d be in Paris or some other philosophy capital, writing about Socrates or something.”

I laughed softly. “Close enough. I came here for university, and I never left.”

“Eight years.” His tone was lighter, but his words carried weight. “It’s been eight years, Y/N. Do you ever go back?”

The question hit me harder than I expected. I took a sip of my coffee to buy myself time. “No,” I admitted. “Not since… well, not since I left.”

Arthur’s expression softened, though confusion lingered in his eyes. “You just… left,” he said gently. “No one really understood why. Charles especially.”

I looked down at my coffee, the words caught in my throat. How could I explain the weight of feeling like an outsider in a world I was supposed to call home?

“I just needed to go,” I murmured. “It wasn’t about anyone else.”

Arthur studied me for a moment, then nodded slowly. “I guess I never really got it, but… if it’s what you needed, then fine.” He paused before leaning forward with a small smile. “Come back. Just for the weekend, for the Grand Prix. I think it’d mean a lot to everyone. To Charles.”

I bit my lip, unsure how to respond. The truth was, I’d thought about going back a hundred times. But every time, I chickened out. Monaco felt like a ghost town to me now, haunted by memories I wasn’t sure I was ready to face.

“I don’t know,” I said finally. “It’s complicated.”

“It doesn’t have to be,” Arthur said simply. He pulled out his phone and started typing something before I could protest. “There. I signed you up as my guest. No backing out now.”

I stared at him, equal parts annoyed and touched by his insistence. “What if I had plans already?”

“Cancel them,” he shot back with a wink. “But seriously, Y/N, it’s time. Come back. Just for a weekend. What’s the worst that could happen?”

I sighed, knowing I’d already lost this battle. And maybe he was right. Maybe it was time.

…

Monaco hadn’t changed. Not really.

The same sunlit streets curved around the cliffs, the same pastel buildings clung to the coastline, their colors soft and warm under the Mediterranean sun. The harbor was still crowded with yachts that gleamed like polished jewels, reflecting the light off the water’s surface. It was all exactly as I remembered—beautiful in the kind of way that made you feel small and insignificant.

I wasn’t sure what I expected. Maybe cracks in the pristine perfection, signs that time had weathered the place the same way it had weathered me. But Monaco, ever the picture perfect place, refused to bend to time.

And for the first time in years, I didn’t resent it for that. The beauty I had once thought insincere now felt strangely comforting, like being greeted by an old friend who hadn’t forgotten you, even if you had drifted apart.

“Here we are, mademoiselle,” the taxi driver said, pulling up to the paddock entrance.

I took a deep breath and stepped out. The familiar hum of Grand Prix weekend surrounded me immediately - the roar of engines revving in the distance, the buzz of chatter from fans and team members, the faint tang of fuel in the air. It was overwhelming, yes, but also exhilarating. Nostalgia wrapped around me, equal parts warm and suffocating.

“Y/N!” Arthur’s voice rang out, pulling me back to the present. He was waiting just inside the paddock entrance, a wide grin spreading across his face as he waved me over.

I smiled despite myself and walked toward him. “Arthur,” I said, my tone teasing. “You’re not old enough to be drinking espresso yet.”

He laughed, pulling me into a hug that was warmer than I expected. “Eight years and you still won’t give me a break. Come on, let’s go.”

“Go where?” I asked as he led me into the paddock, his enthusiasm practically radiating off him.

“Everywhere,” he said simply. “It’s been years. You’ve missed so much.”

Arthur guided me through the maze of the paddock, pointing out everything with a mix of pride and excitement, as though I hadn’t grown up watching all of this unfold. But I let him have his moment, nodding along and laughing at his commentary.

“You look different,” he said suddenly, catching me off guard. “In a good way, I mean. More… I don’t know, serious. Like you’ve seen things. Learned things.”

I raised an eyebrow. “That’s a very poetic way of saying I look old, Arthur.”

“No, really,” he insisted, his expression earnest. “It’s like you’ve grown into yourself.”

The comment was unexpected, but it warmed me. “Thanks,” I said softly. “You’ve grown up too. A little.”

He grinned. “Don’t let Charles hear you say that. He still treats me like a kid.”

At the mention of Charles, my stomach twisted, though I tried to keep my expression neutral. Arthur must have noticed something, because his tone shifted, gentler now. “I know it’s probably weird, being back here,” he said. “But I think it’s good you came. I think… I think Charles will be happy to see you.”

I didn’t have the heart to tell him how wrong I thought he was. Instead, I nodded and let him lead me deeper into the paddock.

…

The paddock was chaos, as always. Media rushing everywhere, team members darting back and forth. But Charles couldn’t focus on any of it.

Because she was here.

He had only seen her for a brief moment, just a glimpse of her stepping out of a taxi and into the paddock. But it was enough to bring back everything; every memory, every laugh, every ache of missing her. She looked exactly like she did before, only prettier. 

It had been eight years. Eight years since she left without a goodbye, leaving him to wonder if he had done something wrong, if he had somehow driven her away. And now she was back, as though she had never been gone.

“Arthur,” he muttered, pulling out his phone. His hand shook slightly as he dialed.

His brother answered on the first ring. “Charles? What’s up?”

“What’s up?” Charles hissed, keeping his voice low as he stepped out of the chaos and into a quiet corner. “Arthur, why didn’t you tell me she was coming?”

There was a pause, then a sheepish laugh. “Ah. You’ve seen her already.”

“Yes, I’ve seen her!” Charles snapped, though the anger in his voice was undercut by the nervous energy bubbling beneath. “You should’ve warned me.”

“I didn’t think I needed to,” Arthur said, his tone annoyingly casual. “I thought you’d be happy. It’s been years, Charles. Don’t you want to see her?”

Charles ran a hand through his hair, leaning against the wall. “Of course I want to see her. I just… I don’t know what to say.”

Arthur’s voice softened. “You’ll figure it out. You always did with her.”

…

Arthur had been called away to a meeting, leaving me to wander the place on my own. I found a quiet spot near the Ferrari hospitality area, nursing a coffee and trying to steady the whirlwind of emotions in my chest.

Being back here was surreal, like stepping into a memory I wasn’t sure I wanted to relive. But at the same time, I couldn’t deny the comfort of it - the familiar sounds, the smell of the sea air mixed with fuel, the vibrant energy of race weekend.

I heard footsteps behind me and turned instinctively, my breath catching as I locked eyes with him.

Charles.

He stopped in his tracks, his expression a mix of shock and something I couldn’t place, something that made my chest tighten. For a moment, neither of us moved. The weight of eight years of silence hung in the air between us, heavy and unyielding.

Before I could say anything, he turned abruptly and walked away.

…

The roar of the engines drowned out everything else. I stood on the hospitality terrace, surrounded by fans who were shouting encouragement in a chorus of excitement. The energy was contagious, a reminder of why I had always loved race weekends, even when the rest of Monaco felt stifling.

Arthur had left me to sit with some of his friends, but I didn’t mind being alone. It gave me a chance to take it all in—the track, the sea of red Ferrari merchandise, the sun reflecting off the sleek cars. My eyes kept drifting to one in particular, the red number 16 that seemed to glide through every corner as though the circuit were made for it.

Charles.

I hadn’t seen him since he walked away from me in the paddock earlier. It shouldn’t have surprised me; after all, what could we have possibly said to each other in that moment? But it still stung, the abruptness of it, the way he looked at me like I was a ghost he wasn’t ready to confront.

I shook my head, trying to push the thought away. It didn’t matter. This wasn’t about him. It was about being here, about reconnecting with a part of my life I had left behind.

But as the race unfolded, I couldn’t stop my gaze from following him. Every lap, every overtaking move, every moment of brilliance - it was impossible not to be drawn in. Charles had always been talented, but seeing him now, so focused and in control, was something else entirely. It was breathtaking.

The crowd around me erupted as Charles crossed the finish line, taking the victory in a masterful final lap. People were cheering, waving flags, hugging strangers in celebration. I found myself smiling, caught up in the infectious energy of the moment.

But my smile faltered as I saw him step out of the car. The joy on his face was undeniable, but there was something else—something in the way his eyes scanned the crowd, as though he were looking for someone.

For a split second, I thought he might be looking for me. But then I shook my head, brushing the thought away. Charles had the whole world celebrating him right now. Why would he waste a second of it on someone who had been gone for so long?

Still, as he climbed onto the podium and lifted the trophy, I couldn’t help but feel that same strange pull I had always felt with him. It wasn’t just admiration or pride; it was I only felt with him.

As the celebrations spilled into the paddock, where the Ferrari garage was alive with champagne showers, laughter, I kept my distance, lingering near the back of the crowd as the team surrounded Charles, congratulating him.

Arthur spotted me and made his way over, a grin plastered across his face. “Pretty incredible, huh?” he said, motioning toward the scene.

I nodded. “He’s… he’s amazing,” I said, my voice quieter than I intended.

Arthur gave me a look, something between knowing and sympathetic. “You should come to the afterparty,” he said. “We’re all heading to Rimaldi later. It’ll be fun.”

I hesitated, the thought of being in a room full of people who knew Charles, who had been part of his world all these years, making my stomach twist. “I don’t know…”

“Don’t overthink it,” Arthur said, cutting me off. “It’s just a party. No pressure.”

I forced a smile, but the weight in my chest didn’t ease. “We’ll see,” I said, knowing full well I wasn’t going to go.

***

The party at Rimaldi was everything Charles had come to expect from these celebrations—loud music, overflowing champagne, and a sea of people he barely recognized. The restaurant’s cozy atmosphere had been transformed into a chaotic celebration, with glasses clinking and laughter filling every corner. Fans and acquaintances congratulated him as though they were old friends, slapping him on the back and offering toasts in his honor.

Normally, this was his element. He was good at this—the smiling, the handshakes, the polite small talk that came with being the center of attention. On any other night, he would have been content to let the noise and the crowd carry him, to let it fill the empty spaces he so often ignored. But tonight was different.

Tonight, no matter how many times he raised his glass or laughed along with a joke, he couldn’t shake the gnawing restlessness that had been with him all day. His mind kept drifting, pulled away from the party and back to the one place he couldn’t seem to avoid—her.

She’d looked the same and yet completely different. The years had softened some edges and sharpened others, but it was still her. Y/N, the person who had once been his closest friend, his anchor in a world that often felt overwhelming. He thought he had moved on from wondering why she left, why she cut him off, but seeing her again brought it all back in a rush.

He barely touched his drink, the glass sweating in his hand as he leaned against the edge of the bar. Across the room, Arthur caught his eye, a knowing grin on his face as he raised his own drink in a silent toast. Charles frowned and turned away, pretending not to notice.

“Charles! Congratulations!” A voice pulled him back to the moment. A well-dressed man, someone he vaguely recognized as a sponsor, clapped him on the shoulder. Charles offered a tight smile, exchanging a few polite words before excusing himself.

The truth was, he wasn’t really here. Not mentally. The louder the party grew, the more it grated on him, every laugh and cheer feeling like static in his ears. His thoughts kept circling back to the paddock, to the way her eyes had met his for that brief, electric moment. She had looked surprised, hesitant, but not angry. That was something, at least.

But then she had disappeared, and he hadn’t been able to stop replaying it in his mind—the way she stood there, so poised and composed, and then was gone, swallowed up by the crowd.

By midnight, he couldn’t take it anymore. The laughter and music blurred into background noise as he stood, shaking his head at someone offering him another drink. He muttered something about needing rest and slipped out through the side door, ignoring Arthur’s raised eyebrows as he left. His brother didn’t stop him, though, and Charles suspected Arthur knew exactly where he was going.

The streets of Monaco were quieter now, the city’s energy winding down after the race. Charles drove aimlessly at first, his hands tight around the steering wheel. The roads he knew so well blurred together as his thoughts raced faster than his car ever could.

He didn’t know what he was going to say. He didn’t even know if she would want to see him. But none of that mattered, because the one thing he did know, the one thought that consumed him, was this:

He needed to see her.

***

The knock at the door startled me.

I glanced at the clock on the bedside table—12:27 a.m. I had been lying on the hotel bed for the past hour, staring at the ceiling, trying to make sense of the day. Arthur’s invitation, the race, seeing Charles for the first time in years—all of it felt like too much, like I had stepped back into a world I didn’t belong to anymore.

Another knock, firmer this time.

I sat up, my heart racing. Maybe it was Arthur, coming to drag me to the afterparty. Or worse, maybe it was a staff member telling me something had gone wrong with my reservation. My stomach twisted as I padded across the room, hesitating before unlocking the door.

But when I opened it, it wasn’t Arthur or hotel staff standing there.

It was Charles.

He leaned against the doorframe, his hands stuffed into his jacket pockets, his hair slightly tousled by the wind. He was dressed casually—dark jeans, a fitted jacket that hinted at his frame—but there was nothing casual about the look in his eyes. They flickered between me and the floor, restless, as though he were trying to piece together why he was even here.

“Hi,” he said finally, his voice quiet but steady.

I stared at him, too stunned to respond at first. “Charles,” I managed after a moment. “What are you doing here?”

His shoulders dropped slightly, like he’d been holding his breath. “Can we go for a drive?”

I blinked, caught off guard. “Now?”

“Yes,” he said, his tone firmer this time, though not unkind. “I need to talk to you. And I can’t do it here.”

I hesitated, glancing back into the room like it held the answer. But there was no answer waiting for me, no excuse strong enough to keep me from following him. “Okay,” I said softly. “Let me grab my coat.”

The streets of Monaco were quieter now, the city winding down after the race. Charles drove with one hand on the wheel, the other resting loosely on the gearstick. His jaw was tight, his eyes fixed on the road, and the silence between us felt heavy, charged with everything unsaid.

I kept stealing glances at him, trying to read the expression on his face, but it was unreadable. It wasn’t anger exactly, but it wasn’t calm either. It was something in between—a tension I couldn’t quite place.

Finally, he turned onto a small road overlooking the harbor and parked. He shut off the engine but didn’t move, his hands gripping the steering wheel as he stared out at the lights reflecting on the water.

“Why did you leave?” he asked finally, his voice breaking the silence like a crack of thunder.

I swallowed hard, my hands twisting in my lap. “I didn’t know how to stay,” I said quietly. “Monaco… it wasn’t the same for me as it was for you. It felt fake, like I was living in a place where everything was about appearances and nothing was real. I couldn’t breathe there.”

He turned then, his gaze sharp and searching. “So you left without a word? Without even telling me?”

I met his eyes, feeling the sting of his words. “I didn’t think you’d understand.”

“Understand?” he repeated, his voice rising slightly. “Y/N, you were my best friend. I would have done anything for you, but you didn’t even give me the chance.”

The anger in his tone cut deep, but beneath it, I could hear something else—hurt. And that was worse.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I said softly. “But I had to go. For me.”

Charles shook his head, running a hand through his hair in frustration. “Do you know how many times I thought about calling you? About flying to London to find you? But I didn’t, because I told myself that if you wanted to talk to me, you would.”

I clenched my hands together, forcing myself to hold his gaze. “I thought about telling you,” I said softly. “But I was scared. Scared that if I saw you, I wouldn’t be able to leave. And I had to leave, Charles. I didn’t know who I was anymore.”

“I would have let you go if that is what you wanted. I just wish I had known.” He said, looking deep into my eyes. 

I felt a lump rise in my throat. “It wasn’t that simple.”

“Even a text or a quick call would have made the difference, Y/N.”

“Then why didn’t you?” I asked, the words tumbling out before I could stop them. “You blame me for no contact, but you never reached out either.”

His jaw tightened, his hands gripping the steering wheel again. “Because I didn’t think you wanted me to,” he said finally, his voice quieter now. “You didn’t leave a door open, Y/N. Not for me, not for anyone.”

The anger in his tone cut deep, but beneath it, I could hear something else—hurt. And that was worse.

We fell into silence, the weight of our words hanging heavy in the air. My chest felt tight, my emotions raw and unsteady. I looked out at the harbor, the city lights shimmering like distant stars, and took a deep breath.

“Explain it to me,” he said, his voice quieter now, almost pleading. “Because I don’t understand, Y/N. I’ve spent eight years not understanding.”

My chest felt tight, the weight of everything we had been avoiding pressing down on me.

“I was scared,” I admitted, my voice trembling. “Scared that if I stayed, I’d lose myself. Scared that if I saw you again, I’d lose the courage to leave. And then… after your dad…” I trailed off, the memory too painful to finish. “I didn’t know how to come back after that.”

Charles’s expression softened, the anger fading into something more vulnerable. “You could have come to me,” he said quietly. “You should have come to me.”

I shook my head, tears pricking the corners of my eyes. “And what would I have said? ‘Sorry for leaving you when you needed me the most’? I couldn’t face that, Charles. I couldn’t face you.”

For a moment, neither of us spoke. The only sound was the faint hum of the city outside.

My chest felt tight, my emotions raw and unsteady, as though years of bottled-up feelings had burst open all at once, leaving me vulnerable and exposed. I turned my gaze toward the harbor, the city lights shimmering like scattered stars on the water, their soft glow blurring slightly as tears pricked at my eyes. The stillness of the moment contrasted sharply with the storm raging inside me.

Charles broke the silence, his voice soft but resolute, as though he’d been holding these words back for far too long. “It shouldn’t have been Arthur who invited you back,” he said, his tone laced with frustration and regret. “It should’ve been me. I should’ve been the one to call you.”

The honesty in his voice hit me like a blow to the chest. I turned to him, my breath hitching as his words sank in. The years apart had been a chasm between us, filled with missed chances and unspoken words, and hearing him acknowledge it felt like a bittersweet relief. My throat tightened, and I struggled to find my voice.

“I know,” I said finally, my voice trembling. “But you didn’t call me. And… neither did I call you. We both let it happen.”

Charles’s jaw tightened, and he looked away briefly, his profile illuminated by the faint glow of the streetlights outside. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter, almost fragile. “I didn’t know how to. After you left, I was confused. I didn’t want to admit how much it hurt. And then it just… felt easier to pretend I didn’t care.”

I let out a shaky breath, the tears I’d been holding back finally slipping free. “The second I got back to Monaco, all I did was look for you,” I admitted, my words coming out in a rush, like I had been holding them in for years. “Everywhere I went, I looked for you. You were everywhere - your face in the streets, your name in conversations, your memory in everything I saw. And yet… you were nowhere.”

I heard Charles inhale sharply, and when I turned back, his eyes were locked on mine, filled with an intensity that made my breath catch. Green and piercing, they were searching for something, some part of me I wasn’t sure I still had to give. Vulnerability. Hope. Regret. I saw all of it reflected in his gaze, and it was almost too much.

“I didn’t know if I wanted to see you again,” he admitted, his voice barely above a whisper. “I didn’t know if I could. But now that you’re here…” He shook his head, his expression softening into something raw and earnest. “Now that you’re here, I can’t imagine letting you go again.”

The space between us seemed to disappear in an instant. Charles reached out, his hand trembling slightly as he cupped my face, his thumb brushing against my cheek in a way that was both tender and desperate. His touch was hesitant at first, as though he was afraid I might pull away. But I didn’t. I couldn’t.

Then, before I could say anything, his lips met mine.

The kiss was soft at first, tentative, like we were both testing the waters of something so fragile it might shatter under the weight of our emotions. But it deepened quickly, carrying years of longing, frustration, and unspoken love. It was messy and imperfect, tears mingling with laughter, but it felt like home in a way I hadn’t felt in years.

When we finally pulled apart, Charles didn’t move far. His forehead rested against mine, his breath warm against my skin. He closed his eyes for a moment, as though grounding himself in the closeness between us, before murmuring, “I don’t want to lose you again. Not ever.”

My heart pounded, each beat echoing the promise in his words. I closed my eyes, letting the moment wash over me, before whispering back, “You won’t.”

In that moment, the weight of the past seemed to lift, leaving something lighter in its place. We weren’t perfect, and neither was this, but it was enough. It was us.

[plotthotrobin]

@medicallyfascinating Absolutely, I’d love to elaborate! ☺️ But I will take it over here to a new post since that one is very Hilda-centric and because this will be a long ramble.

Hilda is very out of place as Claude’s “retainer” as a whole. She doesn’t swear herself to him out of loyalty, she isn’t even really shown to have a bond with him that is any more notable than the rest of the GD. Hell, she’s the one ‘retainer’ character that can be recruited at all. She’s kind of just… there. The only argument that can really be made here is that she is a Goneril, and that house is the one that defends Fódlan’s Throat - and personally, I don’t think that requires her to be in the ‘retainer’ position to touch on.

Most people who play FE3H can tell that some routes got more time and attention in the writing room than others, and I think VW and CF are the biggest victims of this. VW is messy, awful in terms of pacing, and infamously a clone of SS (But, in my incredibly biased opinion, better because of Claude). If I had it my way, the story would focus heavily around relations between Fódlan and Almyra, the Leicester Roundtable, Claude’s background as an Almyran prince, etc etc etc. The biggest crime this route commits is having nothing to do with its lord - especially given how interesting the tidbits he drops really are. With that setup, Cyril may have actually made an interesting ‘retainer’ character considering the fresh perspective on these topics that he could bring to the table. Such as the ones expressed in his really interesting supports with Claude. (I know Cyril isn’t GD, but he’s an honorary one in my mind.)

Assuming we’re sticking to the current VW story as closely as possible, however, there’s one particular issue about VW that stands out: A lot of the TWSITD/Nabatean elements are out of place and completely irrelevant to the Golden Deer and Claude especially.

…With the exception of one character: Lysithea.

Lysithea already pops into the actual story sections post-timeskip to provide information on TWSITD… and then is just brushed aside again. Bringing her more into the spotlight as an unofficial ‘retainer’ for Claude could have made a lot of the unfolding events feel a little less out of place.

Imagine with me that, instead of TWSITD coming up at the last second story-wise, it instead came up during the ongoing fight against Adrestia and Edelgard. In this scenario, Lysithea slowly starts to put two and two together: Edelgard has white hair, purple eyes, has clear connections to terrifyingly familiar mages, and is rushing to accomplish her goal swiftly at the cost of many lives. She hesitantly approaches Claude and Byleth in private and explains not only what happened to her, but that she suspects that the same thing happened to Edelgard. Maybe Lysithea brings up the possibility of her being under the direct control of TWSITD.

Claude is, reasonably, riled up and horrified at finding out all of this and realizes that Fódlan’s issues run much deeper than he initially thought. He now sees:

- The Church of Serios and Rhea, who he knows has been hiding deep secrets that he has been trying to get to the bottom of. He’s been reluctantly working with Seteth and the knights because he needs the support, but doesn’t trust them and still has the understanding that they’re hiding shit.

- Emperor Edelgard of Adrestia and TWSITD, who could potentially be coercing her into fighting the Church of Serios for some unknown reason - or, alternatively, are simply helping Edelgard for an equally unknown reason. He doesn’t trust any of them either, pretty obviously.

Claude now knows that, in order to even potentially achieve his dream of equality and peace, he has to get to the root of the clusterfuck that is Fódlan - because Sothis knows it’s not happening in this state of affairs.

On a more personal level, I’m sure he looks at Lysithea and tries to imagine an even younger version of her being strapped down and experimented on - and frankly, he just can’t bring himself to. It wouldn’t surprise me if, as a secondary goal, he also gently promises to do his best to help her find a cure. In turn, a stunned Lysithea devotes herself fully to him as a leader and his cause.

Now, a lot of this is just a lot of speculation and hypotheticals, and a lot of it is opinionated, but I personally believe there is just inherently more overall story potential this way than with the current setup. ☺️

[emwallas176]

Episode 4x09 of Smallville was genuinely so confusing. Not only was the cold open so traumatizing but then the moral gymnastics that happens for the rest of the episode (and onward) is so confounding.

So the whole premise of the episode is that Lex sleeps around so much that he can’t even remember the names and faces of the women he sleeps with. Strange and concerning on multiple levels. Even if this was completely in character (which I don’t think it is), it is still highly concerning to forget the names and faces of people you’ve been intimate with. I think they said 13 women in the last year. While that’s not a low number, I don’t think it’s high enough to cause such forgetfulness. Therefore it almost seems to imply that there’s a level of disassociation that happens on Lex’s part during the experience (you can’t form new memories if you weren’t really paying attention when they happened). This theory is also backed up by the fact that Lex admits at the end of the episode that he has suicidal thoughts, and (very) unattached sex could be a negative coping mechanism for these dark emotions. As we can see at the start of the episode, Lex looks sad and completely alone at the event. And immediately after that he jumps into bed with someone. There’s clearly a connection there (at least in my mind).

All of the above, however, is not what confuses me. It’s the other characters that I don’t understand. First you have Clark who comes in (as seems to be becoming his pattern) guns blazing and accusatory. Of course this might be warranted seeing as Lex has been quite soundly framed for murder but I digress. During their talk and with what he finds out later, Clark gets very up in arms about Lex having sex with a lot of women. Despite whether this is right or wrong of him to do, it makes absolutely no sense for why it would drive Clark into LIONEL’S arms. Especially bc Lionel admits later on that Lex learned the behavior (sleeping with women and leaving them with a pair of diamond earrings) from Lionel himself?? Like it’s bad and dishonest if Lex does it but apparently makes Lionel trustworthy?? I’m confused. Also! Let’s not forget the fact that Lionel slept with another woman while his wife was DYING! But sure, Lex is the sexually deviant one. Sure.

Also, I feel like there is a lot of disconnect between how Lex and Alicia (in later episodes) are treated. Like Lex sleeps with women (consensually) and almost gets killed by one of them and Clark tells him that he doesn’t know if he can trust him anymore. Alicia forces Clark to marry her and almost forces him to have sex with her (read: non-consensual!) and the next episode she and Clark are dating again. Also, Lex gets framed for murder and when he’s found innocent, Clark rescues him, yes, but at the end of the day he still doesn’t trust Lex. Alicia gets framed for murder and is found innocent (and dies, unfortunately (seriously that was such a shocking death what the hell Smallville?!)) and Clark feels guilty and regretful and tells his parents he wishes he believed her sooner. Now I get that these two situations aren’t quite the same but the different reactions that Clark and the other characters have feel more like the writers playing into future roles (Lex is the villain, yada, yada) rather than actually looking at the characters as they are now.

I think I would have enjoyed the episode more if I’d understood what it was trying to say. Are you trying to say that Lex is “showing a different, darker side of himself” by not caring about the women he sleeps with? Okay then why is it okay for Lionel to do. Are you trying to say that sex in general is bad? Then why have Alicia be forgiven? Why have Lana trying to loose her virginity to Jason? In the end, the episode just left me feeling really frustrated bc I felt like there was something I was supposed to get but I just didn’t get it.

[lsunstreakerl]

back w/the darkbull again I fear. this is the kidnapping again, Charles POV, though as a quick side note: after this ficlet is where this universe would branch for the "bad ending". 1.5k words

CONTENT WARNINGS: dehumanization, breathplay/choking, emotionally manipulative language/gaslighting, absolutely unhinged levels of delusional possessiveness

Charles tugs the rest of the sweatshirt down over Max, who's barely even looking at him, eyes half lidded. He doesn't want to have to keep using such a high dose, and he thinks they're making some positive progress- Max doesn't even fight him much anymore when he tries to move him around.

Charles has found that laying his hand over Max's ribs where the fresh tattoo is, the heavy reminder of the possessiveness- it gets rid of some of the fire. It's still sensitive too, so he has the added bonus of seeing Max squirm.

He slides a hand up under the sweatshirt, brushing his fingers over the constellation, a reminder of their lifelong connection, their red string of fate.

Max makes a breathy little noise, trying weakly to move away, and Charles shushes him, leaning down to kiss his forehead. He brings his hand back out, running one through Max's hair while he reaches with the other for the water on the counter.

It's not a sedative this time- Charles actually intends to wake him up a bit with this one.

He brings his fingers to Max's mouth, thumb pushing gently on his bottom lip, and Max blinks, slow and confused.

"'anny?"

Charles freezes, narrowing his eyes.

"What was that, chaton?"

He can hear the edge in his own voice, and something in him is immediately angry and possessive- here he is, taking care of Max, rescuing him, and all he gets in return is another man's name in his mouth.

Max's eyes widen, just the tiniest bit more aware, and Charles uncaps the water.

"See, because that almost sounded like you said 'Danny', didn't it? And we don't want that."

He's gripping Max's hair tight, tight enough to hurt- he can tell because Max is struggling to lean up into it, take some of the pressure off.

"No... no, I didn't-"

It's still slow and slurred, but Charles can see the edge of panic in Max's eyes. He's realized he fucked up.

It's not his fault Redbull is in so deep, but- Charles can't let it slide, even if Max looks cute like this, desperately pushing up into his hand, eyes starting to sparkle with tears.

Charles sighs.

"I think you did, baby."

He lowers Max's head back down, still keeping his grip on his hair as he brings up the water.

It's easy enough, resting it on his bottom teeth, and he angles Max's head so that he can take sips, but he keeps it constant- Max has to keep drinking if he doesn't want to choke.

It's the most efficient way Charles has found so far, and he doesn't mind it. It makes him feel in tune with Max- Charles pours, Max swallows, they have to work together if Max wants to keep breathing.

Teamwork practice.

Still- Max struggles at the end, slightly off beat, and he gags, trying to pull his head away and cough. Charles doesn't let him- keeps his hand firm as he pours the rest of the water, even as Max starts to really get feisty.

He drops the empty bottle and lets Max sit up a bit, cooing at him as he coughs wetly.

"Aw, poor chaton, did you drink too fast?"

The stimulant is already taking effect, and the cold water wake up call has also helped, because Max's glare is absolutely murderous.

It's cute.

"You fucking choked me, that's not-"

Charles cuts him off simply by raising an eyebrow. He hasn't really let Max be this awake without a gag before, but it sounds like he's exactly as obstinate as Charles remembers.

"No, baby. That is not choking you, I was helping you."

He doesn't want to have to teach Max this right now, but Max has backed him into a corner, so Charles sighs, eyes lingering on the pale column of Max's throat. It's unmarked, after he'd cut the fucking Redbull chain off.

He's going to fix that.

Charles can see it in Max's eyes the moment he realizes, widening in fear, but Charles has him pinned between him and the headboard, he doesn't have anywhere to go.

He swings a leg over his lap to pin him, hand coming up to wrap around his throat.

"Charles- Charles please-"

The begging is pretty. Charles wants to hear more of that later.

"This is choking you."

He bears down, and he's an expert at this- most everyone in Ferrari knows how to do this right, how to apply just enough pressure-

Max spasms underneath him, eyes wide and panicking. He doesn't trust Charles yet, but that's okay. They'll get there. Charles knows what he's doing, wouldn't actually take it too far- it's just some reinforcement.

"And here I thought you were wanting Daniel instead."

He eases up on his throat, keeping his hand loosely wrapped around the front as Max sucks in heaving breaths.

"No- no I didn't- I meant Charles, I-"

He squeezes again, making sure to really dig in his fingers. He wants to leave bruises, a little collar for Max to remember him by while he's gone.

Charles holds it a little bit longer this time, until Max's eyes flutter and he starts going limp, and then he lets go completely, watching fondly as he he collapses back, trying to catch his breath.

It's a bit like playing with an actual kitten- the cat thinks they've won, that they got the toy- but it's been connected to string the whole time, and Charles had no problems reeling him in again and again, until he learns.

"No you didn't, baby. Go ahead, say it again. I know you want to, yes? Or maybe you would rather call for Carlos, or Christian? GP?"

He drags his fingertips down Max's throat, to the dip in his collarbone. The edge of the red sweatshirt looks so pretty against his skin.

Charles is going to keep him forever.

Max is trembling underneath him, mouth snapped shut. Smart kitten.

Unfortunately, it's too late for cute behavior to work for him.

"Say it."

Max looks mutinous as he opens his mouth, and Charles watches him expectantly. He's in trouble either way, and they both know it.

"Danny."

There's a spark of defiance in his eyes, like he's accepted that this will go badly, but he's still determined to fight it. Good.

That's what Charles wants. It's no fun if Max is meek and submissive from the jump- Charles wants to earn it.

He sneers dawn at Max, digging his fingers back into his hair and yanking.

"Shit-"

Max tries to jerk up, to follow his hand, but he's still pinned by Charles.

"You know what you are, chaton? You are spoiled and ungrateful. I am here, staying home to help take care of you, help you get adjusted, and this is what I get?"

There are tears forming on Max's lash line, but he still looks angry when he drags his eyes to meet Charles'.

"I'm not a fucking cat-"

Charles tuts at him, bringing his other hand to squeeze at Max's side over the tattoo.

"Ah-"

Max thrashes, trying to get away from it, but Charles carefully lowers him back down, hand moving from his hair back to this throat, and Max goes still, eyes wide.

"Charles please- please not again, I don't-"

"Shut up."

He snaps his mouth shut.

Charles runs a thumb over his cheek gently.

"Good boy. See how easy it is? Don't you want to be good for me? I don't like hurting you, baby. It's not what I want to do, but you keep making me do that."

Max keeps his mouth shut, because he's a quick learner.

Charles smiles down at him.

"That's what I thought. There's a reason I woke you up a bit today, chaton. I have a factory meeting, and I don't have anyone to housesit you, so you're going to do sim laps here at home, yes?"

Max blinks up at him. He looks like he's actually listening, which is a good sign.

"Good boy. I will still need to gag you, of course, but that is just because you can be very needy, and I don't need the neighbors complaining, you understand."

Max's gaze is back to being murderous, probably at the implied pet comparison again, but he's behaving.

It's definitely only because he thinks he'll be able to hijack the sim rig somehow, use it in an escape plan. Charles isn't worried. It's been Max-proofed.

Though, he's expecting to come back home to a semi-trashed flat. It's fine, he's prepared for the adjustment period.

He strokes a hand through Max's hair gently.

"It's on the Ferrari, because that is what you'll be driving next season, so all you need to do today is try and learn it, okay?"

He grips his fingers just a bit, because he likes the way it makes Max tilt his head into his hand.

"Surely that is not too difficult for you."

Max's lip curls, fierce and defiant.

"I hope you fucking crash."

[ilysungho]

hii! i have some jaehyun thoughts 😁

desperate and inexperienced jaehyun having you in his bed after a night of partying. he'd be sloppy and confused while making out, but would be eager to learn. you ask him to touch you, and he'd get straight into it. you teach him how to rub your clit, pinch your nipples, finger your hole. that eventually gets you to your first orgasm, but he doesn't want to stop yet because he thought you orgasmed so prettily.

it wouldn't work as well compared to the first orgasm though, him failing to get you to a second. every time you'd be so close, his wrists would get tired of moving too fast while rubbing your clit, accidentally edging you each time by slowing down or stopping immediately. you'd get disappointed obviously 🥲 it even gets you to the point of crying because of it, making him feels so guilty.

- 🎐

another ask, another slay. you never miss nonnie… 💗

oh inexperienced virgin jaehyun is actually so!!!! cute!!!! he’d be so messy too, often taking breaks to ask if he’s doing it all correctly because he’s just so unsure about it. his small, breathy, whiny voice would take a break from kissing you as a string of saliva keeps you both connected. and then, it would be so fun to teach him the ropes on how to make you feel good! i don’t think he would even consider penetration until after you’ve cum again because he’s just so fascinated by you and how your body is reacting to his actions. he’s so focused on it all, but alas, he doesn’t have as much stamina as he likes to think he does. he doesn’t know a lot of things, so of course he doesn’t know that you would need some time before feeling like you could orgasm again :(

his tired fingers would be trying so hard to make you cum again just so he could hear your moans and feel you get wetter around him. he’d even get desperate and beg you to cum for him again, but his fingers keep stopping and edging you unintentionally. he doesn’t even know he is edging you! and when you cry from all the denials, he’d be so sorry and guilty, panic setting in as he stops and is just hurriedly apologizing to you, but he quickly get shut up as you kiss him harshly, putting his fingers back in you and moving them for yourself.

[atsadi-shenanigans]

FSBE 12 - Emotional Damage

You make an observation.

On AO3.

Y’all walk. Everything is dim and gloom. Things move outta the corner of your eye and whispers skirt along the edges of your hearing.

Shadowheart seems to still be immune. Her eyes is fever bright.

The fuck does it mean to be in a cult in a place with literal, physical gods.

Fuck.

After an hour or two, Astarion comes drifting back down the line. Dread curls tight in you.

But y’all’re dating. Right? That means communicating. That’s what everybody says. That’s what most of your therapists talked (at) to you about. You just ain’t, like, listened very well.

You take a breath. This is about more than just you. This is about someone other than you, too. So you turn to him. “Good mor—”

“I wanted—” Astarion says at the same time.

The both of you shut up. Then do a little verbal dance, like trying to out polite somebody through the door in front of you.

You win.

“I wanted to apologize,” Astarion says first. There’s a hint of his usual lilting smarm, but it’s too clipped around the edges to be entirely smooth. “For last night. I’m usually, ah, better up to the challenge.”

Oh. When he, well. But you read that plenty of guys do that. Girls, too (you came on his hand in maybe a couple minutes last night, which might be a personal record). You were both going at it, so you don’t really see any reason for him to be so stiff about it. But he’s striding around like some Victorian butler, back yardstick straight, chin perfectly level to the ground (you read British royals train themselves to walk like that).

This man is usually all twirling hands and shoulder shimmies.

You debate it. Decide to take your chances. Lift your hand and flick the shoulder of his armor.

“It’s all good,” you say, when he glances (sharply) to you. “I liked. Um. Being with you.”

“How encouraging,” he says.

The rest of the group is mostly in front of y’all, with Karlach taking up the rear. You hope like hell they mind their own damn business, since half of them got pointy ears and you assume that means they all got super hearing. Fucking close ass quarters.

“How’re you doing?” you say. It’s usually the next step in small talk.

Astarion smiles. There’s something off about it. It’s a little too…perfect. Composed, even.

Fake.

“I’m quite well, all things considered. Rather eager to show you a full sampling of my portfolio, once we get the chance.”

Is he just nervous? Ashamed, maybe? There’s a whole parody song about coming in your pants. He might be worried he, what, disappointed you?

(It did the opposite. It…kinda went to your head in the moment, before he ran off. What an interesting thing to learn about yourself, his soft grunts filling your memory as he clutched at you and the glimpse of his face drawn tight—).

You shake your head. You’re having a conversation, goddamnit, not daydreaming about how he sounds mid-orgasm.

Although you could hear it again. Tonight, even, he seems to be offering. Twenty-five years, give or take, since puberty and you didn’t care much about all that. Felt horny, sometimes, but not really connected to any person (you did have your collection of toys, though, cause you’re a curious kind). Now this man got to you and woke up something in you and your body perks up at the slightest hint of him like a starved dog.

Still.

There’s a weird remoteness to him. And you don’t wanna push things too fast. Right?

“I’m getting kinda rusty on the Chondathan, actually,” you say.

“What?” Comes out flatter than fucking Kansas. The man nearly stops dead.

Ah fuck, you fucked it. Ryan fucking Meadows ghosted you for being frigid and weird and you’re difficult and isolated and, and…

“Chondathan? That you was teaching me?” Because by god, this was the road you turned down and you can’t pull a u-turn now. You just gotta plow further on. “We haven’t used that. Since the Underdark. And I think I’m forgetting it. But it was fun. And seemed important?”

The way he rolled the r’s back at you. The way the words twisted in his smooth voice. The only thing human (kinda) down there. The only other living (mostly) thing that spoke. The tether that meant you wasn’t alone.

“I,” Astarion says. Blinks. Then that weird smile slips back on. “If you like. I do have a few books we’ve picked up along the way.”

And you cannot, can not stop the high sound you make. A month or more. Fucking weeks of sitting around at night, waiting to fall asleep. Sore. Aching. Too tired. Fucking bored.

“Holy fuck, I miss books so bad. Brainworms and monsters and murder and all that shit, I could deal with so much better if I could fucking read.”

Astarion’s lips purse, and he taps his chin with one finger. “Yes, you did mention a ridiculous public library.”

Gale makes a sudden movement ahead.

You kinda doubt he’s got any kids books, though. Nothing you could sound out, let alone comprehend on the little you’ve grasped so far (yet).

“What’re your books about?” You hope to hell they ain’t all religious texts or old essays collections of Old Man Philosopher Yells at Clouds. Historically on Earth, those were the only things valuable enough for people to want to preserve, all copying by hand. Unless they got printing presses here. In which case, could they have novels?

Astarion leans in close (it’s goddamn ridiculous how distracting he smells) and says, “I honestly haven’t a clue. I snatch them up to sort out later.”

Practical, if heavy. Well, maybe not for the average person. Who didn’t grow up in a fuck ass cult out in the sticks that treated anything not the Bible or the printed pamphlets of the Pastor as contraband (you’d been so nervous the first time you ever stepped into the city library) (the lord was gonna strike you dead) (the devil was gonna enter your soul and possess you) (holy shit there was so many and you wanted all of them).

“We can do a book haul,” you say. Which you then have to explain, and this time Gale just stops to let y’all catch up so he can listen in, not even bothering to hide it).

The road curves down and ends in a fuck off giant of a dead tree, fallen on its side over a crevasse. What looks a lot like wagon ruts carve up along that dead trunk.

You’re careful to follow in the exact footsteps of Wyll out front, and absolutely not look anywhere but your next step and the bank beyond. And not visualize your foot slipping, ankle folding, the tumble into the long dark below.

“Would you,” you start, mostly so you can distract yourself. Only to realize how presumptuous you’re being. But Astarion lifts an eyebrow, cause you started a question and need to finish it. “I mean. I don’t wanna be rude. Or demanding or nothing. But um. Would you mind? Reading to me? You can say no.”

“Doing alright back there?” Wyll says, once y’all are across.

You lift a thumb. Which you also then have to explain. Some gestures are the same here, but that one ain’t. Weird.

Astarion watches you, head cocked. Something strains around his eyes. Disappears the second you return your attention to him.

“Of course, my dear. It just seems a waste when we could be enjoying our time with other means.”

His hand in your pants. Maybe even your hand in his pants.

Your body flushes hot and tingling. Greedy. But also, y’know, fucking books.

Gale makes an odd sound and falls back further to join Karlach. You can feel her grin on the back of your head.

“I. I do, um. Like that,” you say. A lot. You’d probably ruin your panties here in a minute or two as your body starts to holler about it. “But, I dunno. That’d get boring if that’s all we do, huh?”

Astarion’s face changes. Or the angle does, or the torchlight hits it odd and you been spending too much time staring at him. Like repeating a word too many times, until it don’t sound real. A twitch, a flicker of something, and he looks like a different person.

His eyes. They’re…round. Ain’t never seen them that young. It makes him look…younger. Softer, maybe. Only for a second. Just enough to clock it. Then he twists himself back to smarm. Lifts a hand and presses it to his chest all offended southern belle, and gives a tiny gasp.

“Boring? Oh darling, have I left you so unsatisfied? Perish the thought. Only, you sounded quite pleased when I joined you last night.”

Said loud enough for everybody to hear. Do not glance back, Shadowheart. Don’t she fucking dare. She fucking offered you birth control, she knows what y’all’re about.

“Oh, what an interesting stone formation over there,” Gale says behind y’all.

You want to swat Astarion’s arm. You want to swat him so bad.

And the reply comes to you. Perfect. Sharp. A glance to his crotch and a crook of your eyebrow and you could say “really” all flat and he would know exactly what you was talking about.

But he ran off last night. Fucking apologized to you about it, and this seems…this is covering. All of it. It washes over you all cold and syrupy. His approach, what he’s said, his offer. He’s…worried. What, that you don’t like him no more? That you don’t want him no more?

That perfection in your mind would hurt him. Maybe more than you even know. You can see that clear as day, and the thought makes your heart ache (jesus fuck, you’re in so fucking deep).

You ain’t gonna do that to him. And fuck everybody else being nosy or judgy to you. You gagged down enough shame on the farmstead for years. You ain’t gonna choke down one drop more. Especially not here. Like this.

You lift your chin. Meet his gaze. “My people got a saying about too much of a good thing turning it sour. If all y’all eat is chocolate, you get sick. So yeah, I did like it. And if you don’t mind, darlin, I’d like you to read to me tonight. You, you got a nice voice.”

Probably didn’t need the last part, judging from Karlach’s tiny squeal and Shadowheart’s face pinching so hard you can see it in fucking profile. But it happened, and it seems to have whammied your target. Man actually takes a step back before he catches himself. And there’s them wide eyes again. Like…like you. In them early days. When Sasha or one of the group home neighbors baked some cookies and brought them to you, and you wasn’t used to getting anything but basic rations and a new dress when yours got too roughed up to patch, because asking for more was a sin. Decadence opens the door to the devil.

To this man, one compliment is a whole tray of cookies. A gift he wasn’t expecting. Something that didn’t even occur to him.

Your heart hurts again.

“I, of course,” he says, all quiet.

Up ahead, Wyll calls out. “I see light ahead!”

[moonsuke]

Episode Nagi 31

I love how the difference between Nagi and Isagi/the traditional Blue Lock ego is highlighted here again: “いま世界で一番熱いのは俺だ!!!"　"世界一のストライカーは俺だ!!!"

"The most fired up in the world... is me!!!" vs "The best striker in the world... is me!!!"

It's just the way it’s said with "Ore da!!!" (is me!!!) at the end. That's their ego speaking and Nagi really doesn’t care about being the best striker lol. What he, who never felt nor experienced much before Blue Lock, really cares about is more personal, like feeling the heat, fighting for something at stake, the joy of “winning”, being reborn, finally feeling alive and just having his existence validated. It’s very much linked to personal growth.

I guess Kaneshiro said it best with geniuses having self-type egos. It's becoming clear how much he takes into account Nagi's character when creating all the different ego dichotomies considering how neatly he fits into each. Same with Isagi. I guess they really are meant to be the ultimate representatives of their type and the polar opposite of each other.

And speaking of Isagi, I’ve quite mixed feelings about his phantom appearing lol, mainly because I wanted some genuine BarouNagi team up (fuck u knsr). But reading it again, in a way it’s highlighting to us they were both on the same wavelength. At the last critical moment, both were able to summon an ultimate play by visualising their ultimate rival, a very “genius” way of doing things.

Also seeing these panels made me feel some type of way:

How you can’t tell whether they’re looking at Isagi’s phantom or at each other in understanding (I think it’s the latter), to their quiet acknowledgement of each other as their shared visualisation of Isagi vanishes… In a way it’s kinda cool? How it shows them teaming up but still keeping that distance and friction between them while connected by their common goal to win Isagi. It’s a very “manly” (otokorashi) team up lol.

But also fuck you knsr, he always does this!! This “giving you what you want but not in the way you completely want” schtick. Always!!! He’s always treading on mixed allusions and “the borderline” <_<

I guess he really doesn’t want any other rivalry outside of Isagi so whatever’s between BarouNagi shouldn’t be labelled as such. He’ll never stop my yearning for more BarouNagi tho, in any form <_<

Anyway, I’m convinced now that he’s trying to match up events between the main series and the spin off. Idk what’s he trying to do but the Isagi focus in the newest chapters of both series ain’t a coincidence. Personally, I actually kinda like Nagi being “obsessed” with Isagi mainly because I like it contrasting and complementing his attachment to Reo, but the Isagi glazing by everyone is getting a bit much x_x

And speaking of events matching up, the next Episode Nagi chapter will be released on March 7, and it’s titled “いつか死ぬ君へ” (to you who’ll die someday)… I’m convinced the current BM vs PXG match will end before then and we’ll get to see Nagi again in the main series… And the EpiNagi chapter with the ominous title is gonna be linked to that…

Nagi in the main series has been set to “die” for a while now considering his talk with Barou “Go die and come back, you coward”. Even with Rin, death was mentioned “Do babies think about death when they’re born?” “This place is filled with tepid losers so I’ll go down to hell”.

Kinda side tracked but interesting how Barou’s talking about being reborn after dying, yet Rin’s talking about descending to hell willingly. I think it might be a foreshadowing to Rin’s downfall… or not… but anyway…

Nagi’s written to be set to die because no way is his downfall arc gonna be magically resolved in such an anticlimactic manner. He can’t be reborn when he hasn’t even died which makes it very fitting for “to you who’ll die someday”… right? Not to mention his whole skull motif and telling Reo to not die before him… So if anyone is dying during/after their final match… it wouldn’t be Reo.

But what I find most “telling” is probably this last page:

It matches up completely to how Nagi looked losing his ego after beating Isagi. I’m pretty sure it’s on purpose, to make us think back to main series’ events and with that title…

Fuck, I’m getting so scared and sad yet also excited thinking about this next chapter. March can’t come soon enough, I’m only hoping Nagi’s story will be handled well ;-;

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for Tim falling for you

Tim Bradford x reader

warnings:

a/n: im gonna be so honest i love him your honor

prompt: @sacredwarrior88: “May I please request headcanons for Tim falling in love with a female detective who's also a veteran and swore off love and relationships after her divorce?”

you’d just transferred to mid wilshire a few months prior

and from the moment tim heard you complaining about discipline and rookies needing a kick in the ass—he was head over heels

you were also a veteran, he felt a connection with you for that

he’d always make small talk with you

“so, where’d you serve?” -tim

he was cute and all, you just weren’t ready to fall in love again—or ever

“you know, i think tim really likes you, l/n” -lucy

“oh, i know” -you “you don’t become a sergeant in the army and not be able to tell when a boy has a crush on you”

“so? you don’t like him back or something. he’s a great guy, he was my TO. i mean, he’s a hard ass, but like, he’s a great guy” -lucy

“i appreciate you trying to help, but i’m not here looking for a relationship, chen” -you

harper and lopez would rag on him constantly for not making a move

“they just got here, i’ll give it a few more months” -tim

“it’s been a few months, what’s really going on?” -lopez

“yeah, bradford, i never took you for a shy guy” -harper

“we’ve been out for a few beers, it’s just…” -tim

“well, spit it out!” -lopez

“y/n just got divorced and told me they don’t want to get into anything serious—ever again” -tim

“wow, your dream partner just walks into your life and is unattainable by means of hating all men” -harper

“well, you thought you’d never find love again after your divorce and look at how far you’ve come, tim. at least give it a little time” -lopez

“isn’t that what i just said?” -tim

“i get where y/n’s coming from, though. i mean, after i got divorced i was over all men forever. now i’ve got a husband and another beautiful daughter” -harper

tim felt really discouraged, he thought you were perfect for him but he understood that dating a coworker was complicated. so was divorce

but instead of trying to get you, he tried to be there for you

“how’ve you been. new station, new city, new start?” -tim

“it’s fine. taking it day by day” -you

“you know, i could give you some good restaurant recommendations or something?” -tim

“no thanks, lucy beat you to it” -you

“of course she did. you know, she used to be my rookie” -tim

“she told me right after she told me you have a crush on me” -you

tim got red in the face very fast

and you made sure to keep your composure just long enough to make it awkward

“she…she did, did she?” -tim, through clenched teeth

“yep” -you, starting to laugh

“you’re messing with me” -tim

“i’m not, actually. i just think its cute you’re embarrassed” -you “but you already know my story”

“i do. and i hope you can take the time you need before you agree to go out with me, because i don’t think i’m gonna get you out of my head anytime soon” -tim

“ooh, sergeant bradford, i didn’t think i’d get to see this side of you. you’re always tripping over your words with me” -you

“well, i had a helpful talk with some meddling detectives” -tim

“i can take a guess who you’re referring to” -you

“i’d love to grab a beer with you sometime if you’re not ready to date yet, but i’d love to grab dinner with you if you are” -tim

“i’ll give dinner a thought, but for now drinks will do” -you

tim started treating you mostly normal and getting his confidence back since spilling his guts to you over drinks, and the girls were cheering him on every time you were within 20 feet of each other

he started treating you professionally, with a few winks and sly comments here and there

“so, you’re giving bradford a chance?” -lopez

“i’m giving a chance to giving him a chance” -you

“i feel you there, after my divorce i couldn’t imagine dating again, but i’m glad i found it in me to give my husband a chance” -harper

“he’s a good one?” -you

“eh, i’d give him a solid 6 out of 10” -lopez

“yeah? well i’ve been debating taking him up on that dinner, but that six rating really convinced me” -you

you finally found caught tim after shift and gave him the good news and he couldn’t be more excited

really, he’d been planning this date for weeks

and it went amazingly

“can i kiss you?” -tim

“only if you want to” -you

taglist: @summersimmerus //

[crowsofdarkness]

CamBoy! Bill Skarsgard: First Virtual Meeting

-pic not mine.-

Pairings: CamBoy!Bill Skarsgard x Viewer!Reader

Summary: Bill isn't ashamed of the work he does, showcasing his body online for anyone willing to pay. His number one rule was never to make a connection with anyone who either sent him messages or paid for private one-on-one video sessions. That was until you decided to request a certain private session.

Content Warnings: 18+ smut which includes Bill having an only fans page, masturbation, phone sex, virtual sex, and language.

Authors Note: this is a limited mini-series, just a bunch of blurbs that take place in this universe. i'm not sure exactly how long this will be. tags will be open for this if anyone is interested!

CamBoy!Bill masterlist.

What the hell am I doing? 

I found myself asking that same question more than once ever since I signed up for only fans a few weeks ago. Not as a producer but as someone that watches and enjoys. At first I was extremely nervous, chasting myself for even thinking of subscribing to strange men who do sex work, virtually. But after being single for my entire life, I’d become desperate. I craved some kind of attention whether it be sexual or just a simple conversation. Although, after being subscribed to a few different pages on Only Fans for a few weeks, I had yet to actually talk to anyone. 

I mean, who the fuck subscribes to Only Fans to talk to people?

Again, asking myself what the hell am I doing?

Letting out a deep breath, I eased farther back into my bed with my laptop on my lap as I clicked through the different pages I subbed to, ready to unwind after a long day. I had a date earlier that ended in disaster, further proving that maybe a relationship was not meant for me. It was weird, me finding more comfort doing this rather than dating. 

Even though there were a few accounts I liked, there was one that I had always found myself going back to when I thought I wanted something different. 

Bill with the 70’s porn stache. 

I watched nearly all of his videos with my rose vibrator pressed against my clit or using my dildo while Bill had his hand wrapped around his cock. He never had any special effects or wore masks like a lot of the other creators on here which is why I found myself drawn to him. He also had a tik tok page where he would post videos showing off his defined abs or trying whatever viral sound was trending. I liked every single new video he posted but never commented due to being shy. He had over a million followers, there was no way he’d ever pay attention to one of my comments. 

Earlier today, he posted a Tik Tok saying he’s offering a new type of content on his OF page, one on one virtual meetings. For a certain amount of money, Bill would skype call someone for ten minutes and they could have virtual sex. Only one time. He made it clear that he would never have more than one virtual call with someone. Almost immediately I checked to see if my funds were available for this but then when I actually thought about it, it was weird, right? Having virtual sex with a stranger? 

Then again, how would it be any different than me getting off to old videos he posted? 

He would actually be talking to you. Which is what you want, no? 

Gnawing on my bottom lip, I quickly signed up for this special one on one virtual meeting and after paying the amount that would put a small dent in my bank account, I waited. Bill mentioned earlier that due to how many people would most likely sign up, he would have to set times and dates for everyone. So instead of sitting for a reply, I opted on placing my laptop on the other end of my bed and dragged my feet to the bathroom across the hall in my apartment. When I first sat down with my laptop, my body had been vibrating with the need for a release but now as the nerves began to eat away at me for what I’d just signed up for, I needed to think of something else. 

By the time I returned into my room, towel wrapped around my soaked body, I saw a flashing notification on my laptop making my heart nearly burst out of my chest. I didn’t bother to get dressed, simply sat on the edge of my bed still in my towel and brought my laptop to my lap. 

New message from Porn Stache Bill. 

While his username wasn’t that great, he made up for it with the content he provided. 

Letting out a deep breath, I clicked open the message and nearly choked on my saliva when I saw it was a video message from Bill. 

“Fuck, this is too real,” I muttered under my breath, finger hesitating over the play button before I hit it.

Bill appeared on the screen of my laptop, dressed in only a pair of grey sweats. The muscles of his abs seemed to rippled underneath the light of his bedroom as he leaned back against the dark sheets of his bed. His hair was messy, chest rising and falling with each deep breath he took which only made me wonder what he’d been doing before he recorded this video. My eyes, however, quickly honed in on the mustache. I was a sucker for it with every single one of his videos.

“Hi, Y/N.” His face broke out in a smile followed by a wink and I nearly fell back onto my own bed when I heard my name fall from those full lips. “I wanted to say thank you for signing up for my private one on one video chats. I’ll be calling you tomorrow night at nine p.m. You have me for ten minutes for whatever you want. If there are any limits, please let me know beforehand. I look forward for our time together.”

When the video ended, I couldn’t ignore the way my heart sank at how monotone Bill sounded. But then again, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was recording the same video over and over again, only changing the names for everyone who signed up. 

Closing my laptop, I set it on my desk before stepping into my closet to find something to wear tomorrow night on this video chat. 

“What the actual fuck am I doing?” I yelled at myself while I paced my bedroom. 

It was five minutes to nine and to say I was a nervous wreck was a fucking understatement. I could barely concentrate at work today and when I went out with some friends after work, all I could think about was this video chat that was about to happen. I didn’t dare tell any of my coworkers I signed up to have a sexual video chat with a complete stranger because I knew they would try and talk me out of it. Sex aside, I was doing this for me as terrible as that sounded. I’d been in my own shell for the last 28 years of my life, never branching out or trying anything hence why I’d been single. No one wanted someone who was inexperienced. 

How pathetic. You signed up on a sex website to help a stranger with sexual activities and for them to talk to you. No wonder why you’re single. 

Once again ignoring the criticizing voice in my brain, I stopped pacing in front of the large mirror in my bedroom to give myself one final once over. My hair was pulled back in a tight french braid, I wore very minimal makeup, and the outfit I wore was anything but sexy mostly because I didn’t own any lingerie. I chose to wear a loose white shirt that hung off one of my shoulders and a pair of olive green panties which you couldn’t see due to the length of the shirt. 

My bedroom wasn’t anything fancy or special, and with the way I had my laptop set up, Bill would only be able to see me and the wall behind my bed which had those vine lights hanging against it. 

Just as those thoughts began to creep in again, a noise from my laptop had me turning on my heels; the clock on my nightstand blinking 9:00 pm. Bill was calling me. 

“No turning back now,” I sighed, sitting on my bed. 

I didn’t bother trying to find a sexy position to sit in because I wasn’t that; sexy. I’d always been average and it took me awhile to accept it. With shaky fingers, I accepted the video chat and soon was graced with that mustache and smile. 

“Hi. Y/N, right?” 

I blinked, forcing myself not to gawk too long at his bare chest. Bill wore a pair of red boxers as he sat relaxed on his office chair. Unlike the video he sent me yesterday, his hair was neatly combed to the side. 

“H-hi,” I said. 

Bill smiled. “Nervous, huh?” 

My cheeks burned and I ran my sweaty palms on the comforter of my bed. “A little. I’ve never actually done this before.” 

“Is there anything I could do to ease your nerves?” He asked while easing back into the chair. 

“Uh, maybe if you could take the lead.” 

The corner of Bill’s mouth curved slightly. “I read over the list you sent over. Seems like you don’t really know what you’re into.”

I cast my face down, not wanting him to see the embarrassment that covered me. This was a very bad idea. I shouldn’t have signed up for this. 

“Hey,” Bill’s soft voice from my laptop made me lift my gaze slightly. “It’s alright. There’s no need to be embarrassed. We all have to start somewhere when it comes to sex.”

I bit my bottom lip. “If I’m being honest, I’m not sure why I even signed up for this. I thought maybe it could help break me out of this shell. But now I think maybe it’s only making things worse. Which I know sucks because I already paid for this and there’s no refund so I guess I’ll eat the money. I’m sorry that I wasted your time. I don’t know why I did this.” 

“Seems like you ramble when you’re nervous,” Bill chuckled. 

I cringed at myself. This was something I already knew and the fact this attractive man, who I spent hours watching his tik toks and O.F content, immediately called me out on it made me shrink farther into my bed. The hem of my shirt rode up my thighs when I did, showcasing my panties. Bill’s eyes darkened as he sat straight up in his computer chair to get a closer look at the camera. 

“If you want, we can just talk,” he offered me a smile. 

I thought about it for a moment. While I did start this whole thing to try and find someone to talk to, I also did want this to break me out of this shy shell. 

“No, I want to do more but I don’t know where to start,” I admitted. 

Bill glanced at something off screen for a few beats before looking back at the camera. “We have seven minutes. Would you rather us both do something, just you, or just me?” 

I sighed. “Maybe if you just did something? Since I’m so fucking nervous, I think it would be better if I watched you.”

“You’re kind of cute when you curse,” he winked. “Alright, as long as you're comfortable with it. How about you strip for me?” 

“I don’t know why you would want to see me,” I said. 

“Your shirt is thin, Y/N. The last four minutes of us talking, I’ve been looking at those pretty tits underneath. I bet they’re round and so perky,” Bill’s voice had deepened, his hand starting to leave the armrest of his chair. 

“Oh,” I muttered, glancing down at my chest which was in fact visible through my shirt. 

“Just the shirt for me, Y/N. You can keep those green panties on. That alright?” 

Slowly nodded, I dragged up my shirt over my head, letting it fall to the bed next to me. Bill groaned, pushing his chair back so I could see all of him as he took out his cock from his boxers. 

“I knew it. I knew your tits were perky round.” 

I watched, frozen, as he wrapped his hand around his cock in a grip that had to have hurt but only seemed to bring him more pleasure. This wasn’t anything new for me, I’d watch plenty of videos of him teasing his followers on Tik Tok or posting more intimate videos on his O.F. 

Only this time, this was more private. It was only between us. 

“Lay down on your bed for me and spread your legs. Can you do that?” 

Bill’s hoarse voice made my skin shiver with heat and doing what he did, I slowly laid on my bed with my legs spread wide. The show of him jerking himself off made a small wet spot appear on my panties, something he immediately noticed. 

“The sight of me choking my cock with my hand is making you wet, huh?” 

I nodded, slightly blissed out from the sight on my screen. Bill’s jaw was slack as his hand moved in a fast rhythm. I studied the way his thumb would drag over the beads of precum on the head before using it as lube to make his cock slick with it. Or how he would grip the base of his cock, holding it for a few seconds before choking on a breath. 

My pussy ached with the need to touch myself but I couldn’t move. Too engrossed in the private show he was giving me. No one else. Me. 

“Can you touch your nipples? For me, please.” 

Something flared deep inside of my gut at how he begged me so with another nod, I began playing with my nipples in the way I knew I liked. I arched off the bed slightly when I pinched a little too hard. 

“You like it rough, Y/N? The harder, the better?”

“Yes,” I moaned, watching him through hooded eyes.

Bill licked his lips, tongue grazing over the mustache, and I let out a moan when I watched his hips stilled right as he spilled into his hand. 

“Oh fuck, Y/N. You see that? You see what you do to me?” He groaned, working himself through the aftershocks. 

“Oh my fucking god,” I moaned, letting my head fall back to my pillow and my fingers grazed over my panties. 

I was going to wait to touch myself after the call ended, too embarrassed to do that in front of Bill. But seeing him come apart while he watched me pinch and pull at my nipples nearly tipped me over the edge and I knew I wouldn’t last long. 

Just as I went to slip my fingers inside of my panties, my phone began buzzing when the ten minute timer went off. Feeling the world drop from around me, I sat up in bed to silence the timer and stared at the laptop screen where Bill was slumped in his chair trying to catch his breath. 

“I’ve been doing this for a while but that,” he motioned to his messy cock, “Was so fucking messy.

A red hue covered my entire face and my ears as I avoided my gaze from the screen for a moment. “I bet you say that to everyone” 

Bill reached for the tissues on his desk before he began cleaning himself off. “Well, it seems like our ten minutes are up. I hope it was everything you wanted.” 

Silence filled the air between us for a few beats as I tried to think of what to say. Do I thank him? Do I say see you later? Can’t wait to see the next video you post?

“Uh, yeah. Sure. Thank you for this, for everything you do. It’s always a nice thing to see. You’re a nice thing to see. Not your thing! I mean it’s nice, don’t get me wrong. But-.”

Smooth, Y/N. Real fucking smooth.

Bill let out a deep and hearty laugh, running a clean hand through his hair, and tucked himself back inside of his boxers. 

“You’re fucking adorable when you ramble. Have a good night, Y/N.”

When the screen went black, I let out a long breath and closed the laptop. This was the one and only time we would have a private moment like this, just the two of us. He’d continue to post videos, which I planned on watchling like I had before, but now I couldn’t push away the lingering feeling that it would be different now.  

I originally signed up for this thinking it would break me out of my shell, help me find out more about myself, sex wise, and what I was into for future partners. Hell, the few words I spoke to Bill was enough to fill the empty void in my life, even if it was for a few minutes. But now that it was over, I realized how much of a mistake it was. It wasn't the shame that usually followed after I watched porn but more so the disappointment in myself because the only way I could have a man's attention on me was if I paid for it. 

Clearing my throat, feeling the burn slowly rise, I snatched up my shirt and walked towards my bathroom; Bill’s words clinging to my sweaty skin. 

Oh fuck, Y/N. You see that? You see what you do to me?

[subconscious-solipsist]

Okay so like I haven’t actually seen my father in like 6 years but he will occasionally text me something random and the way I have no clue what he’s saying sometimes???? It wasn’t even mean or bad it just made negative sense??

[ninyard]

Bipolar Jeremy at the height of a manic episode during his first banquet. Bipolar Jeremy spent insane amounts of money when he was manic once and that’s why he has to keep receipts for everything and doesn’t have much control over his finances. Jeremy attempted as a teenager and that’s why his mom won’t let him move out, because maybe she’s actually just too overbearing and worried about him, checking up on him all the time to make sure he’s okay.

[fortruechaos]

Her deflation is pretty apparent; oops now I gave her too little, Shadow thinks, but before he can try to make it clear that he isn't upset anymore, Amy jumps right into the last card. And that deflation is quickly replaced with fondness. Shadow is glad because he wasn't really sure how he was going to say sorry for being too closed off again.

Shadow looks from the card to Amy and back and curiously picks it up in his hands at her look, tilting the card a bit from side to side to watch as the holo catches the light. "Hm." He thinks he likes this one too. KNOWS YOU'VE BEEN FIGHTING FOR THEM. Well, if Shadow was like Amy and took it to apply to some sort of romantic love, that would be nice. But even applying it in a way he's more predisposed to want to, the way that speaks to his general connections and self of sense, he's happy to have gotten this card. In the way that his friends all push him to be able to fulfill that guiding wish from above; stars upon stars, stars leading back to the Polaris that is Maria's hope for humanity. "So...overall it's a positive read?" He sets the card back down on the table. "It seems like it is."

To be honest, it is kind of surprising how much match-up there seems to be in the cards to his own life. From The Hermit (name of the card aside) being a man traveling on his own to seek self-discovery and actualization, to forging specific close bonds that carry him forward in The Chariot, all to help push him in fulfilling wishes and healing as represented by The Star. Shadow won't go as far as to say he believes in any of this stuff, but now he can kind of get the appeal. Actually get and not just hand-wave it with a semblance of understanding.

Amy can't help deflating--The fact he responds to basically nothing that she says leaves her feeling like maybe this was a bad idea. BUT!!! Shadow said to keep going; He must not be totally over it yet. Good, because Amy's sure a partial reading would drive both of them insane once they put the cards away.

"Yeah, okay..." She clears her throat, trying to gather up some of her knowledgeable excitement again. "So your third card can represent your friends, forces around you--whatever resonates the most." Amy flips it to reveal an orange and pink Mobian woman pouring out a jar of water--Above her hangs a glittery star that seems to reflect all the colors of a rainbow, like the chaos emeralds. Holographic foil is so cool.

"The Star..." For a few seconds, Amy just stares at it. Fond and knowing. Rebirth, renewal, recovery. They push the card over for Shadow to take and their smile goes warm. "This one is all about healing and hope. Someone or something that helps you reach those things, or knows you've been fighting for them. You may already have a light guiding you and they try to help you follow it." Amy sees this card often in her own readings; It has a kindness to it that she can't explain, a caring nature. Shadow doesn't believe in the occult, but Amy wonders if the feeling might be there for him, too.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

Something something about us being shown Eddie developing his cooking skills before buck - that were shown Eddie being able to cook a full meal (and bake) before were shown Buck doing the same thing. And something something about that foreshadowing Eddie having his full feelings realisation before buck.

Eddie’s cooking skills are on display in 5x11 outside looking in when he cooks dinner for buck Chris and Taylor - and he’s baked cupcakes for desert as well.

But we don’t actually get shown buck cooking a full meal until the 6x01 lasagne. He’s only got as far as breakfast foods when he makes Maddie an omelet in 2x04 stuck but we don’t get shown him actively cooking again until he makes the lasagne.

After that its hit and miss on the cooking and baking front for buck - burnt lasagne in a 7 and I’m assuming his baking isnt that great in 8x07 by the way Chim has one bite and then pushes the loaf away before he masters the ziti, garlic bread etc in 807 and then later the scones in 8x08.