#I think I would lose it honestly
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hinamie · 2 months ago
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happy gojoday to all who celebrate
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swordmunch · 9 months ago
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You can be not ableist and still say ableist things.
I understand that this post may not seem ableist to you, and I don't dislike you or hate you for thinking in this manner. Even as an autistic person, I still have issues with ableism related to autism, myself.
Additionally, I do not expect you to read this or listen to this in any significant manner because it's your life, your cousin, and does not affect me at all.
With that said, my analysis:
I think the thing people take issue with—or at least what I take issue with—was this paragraph:
"For context, my cousin has EXTREMELY severe autism, to the point where he quite literally cannot form any connections with people and does not sit down at all. He is always running around, yelling in garbled speech, and doesn't understand words, sentences, or commands. He only responds to his name when his mother calls it. He isn't intelligent mentally, either. I do love him a lot in spite of how he has never paid attention to me or treats both me and everyone else around him as though they don't exist"
The biggest problem for me is the "quite literally cannot form any connections with people...I do love him a lot in spite of how he has never paid attention to me..." I understand the emotional frustration that comes with having an annoying younger family member with whom it feels you cannot connect with.
As someone who does not like children, I personally dislike my cousins etc "in spite of how [they have] never paid attention to me," to use your own words lmao. Completely understand this sentiment. The thing that bothers me about this is that you seem to be connecting the autism to this frustration. This is related to the first half of the quote:
This is not an attack on your person or your intelligence, but this idea that autistic people, of any level of functioning, "quite literally cannot form any connections with people" is false. I understand I do not know your cousin; I also understand that this post was probably written in a very emotionally charged headspace, but I felt like, for positive interaction going forward with your cousin, I should at least try to put in my two cents.
The biggest hurdle people usually have with really understanding and internalizing this idea is that, especially as kids, autistic people don't communicate in the same ways allistic people (people without autism) do. Additionally, a lot of autistic kids don't know how to...communicate the ways they communicate lmao.
This is a very complicated issue that cannot just be covered by "ew why are you ableist" because that is not the case. Even as an adult, I still face a lot of issues communicating with my parents and other allistic and/or neurotypical people.
In a way, I do agree with the people telling you to "better yourself" and "not be ableist" because, with the just despicable lack of education about autism and how to properly communicate and understand autistic individuals, everyone needs to "better [themself]" and "not be ableist". I had to do it—and I'm autistic!
I hesitate to call you, yourself "ableist" because it is obvious that you are not. However, at the same time, it is most impossible to not be ableist considering our lack of education around the topic.
I did vote YTA not because of this unwitting ableism—again, not because I think you're ableist, but because of the bigotry baked into our very social systems—but I voted YTA because of how you reacted—the screaming at your cousin until he had a meltdown.
However, I could really tell throughout the whole think that you were trying to respect your cousin, but had a very hard time doing so due to the heightened emotions.
You can feel free to stop here if you're still reading, catventures, because the next bit is more about linguistic peculiarities and facets of phrasing. I'm a bit of a nerd about linguistics (it's a special interest lmao), so the rest is just going to be me rambling on about linguistic peculiarities—if you're comfortable, I'd also really like to know what your mother tongue is so I can go wacko about linguistic differences. What that'll do is it'll let me inform myself about how colloquialisms work in your language, especially because I have comparisons!!!
About the "born wrong" thing—that struck me as bad because it is a really ableist thing to say. You addressed this in your follow-up, but it's not just that it sounds better in your mother tongue, as you said, but that it's an ableist phrase which implies that there is something broken about autistic people. Not sure if you knew that but I felt it was important nonetheless.
Again, another thing that's more of an English ableist phrase than an actual like...thing? I guess is the best way to phrase that... is this phrase in your follow-up: "We need to accept that some kids or people are simply like this." In English, this is also essentially saying that something is broken about autistic people (or whatever person/group of people this phrase is referencing, regardless of context). The grouping of "like this" or "like that" is the pivotal phrase here that turns the whole sentence into a derogatory one instead of a positive one. A minor contributing factor is the use of the verb "accept". These two groupings placed in the same sentence work to make it derogatory.
Congrats if you made it this far! That sounds really condescending, but I mean it very genuinely. It's always very hard to confront when you're wrong. It's even harder to confront when you're not wrong (emotionally) but took the wrong actions.
Already in your original post I see this—confronting the fact that you took the wrong actions. I feel as if I'm overstepping, especially because you're a stranger lmao, but I've very proud of you—this isn't easy! It's even harder when you're doing so with a younger autistic cousin surrounding an emotionally charged event. I
know I certainly wouldn't have had your composure—and that's like? What? What composure? But you really did, considering it seems like you made this post very soon after this event and were ALREADY confronting the fact that, though your emotions were valid, your actions were not (in my opinion, lmao).
Wow this is so long lmao sorry. I wish you well, catventures.
AITA for banning a child from my house?
It's not my child, btw- it's my cousin, an 8 y/o autistic boy. I am 15 and it's technically not my house.
For context, my cousin has EXTREMELY severe autism, to the point where he quite literally cannot form any connections with people and does not sit down at all. He is always running around, yelling in garbled speech, and doesn't understand words, sentences, or commands. He only responds to his name when his mother calls it. He isn't intelligent mentally, either. I do love him a lot in spite of how he has never paid attention to me or treats both me and everyone else around him as though they don't exist.
I have (had?) a cat. I have raised this cat for 3 years and I got this little furball when he was only 2 weeks old. I gave him milk and cared for him so, so much. He was a Persian-British mix and was, frankly, pretty dumb and sleepy all the time. Like a little doll.
My cousin also, apparently, decided that my cat, Velvet, was doll-like, because he grabbed Velvet and refused to let the cat go. I was in the bathroom at the time and only heard the cat's mewing. Nobody else was home. My cousin thought it would be nice to throw Velvet out of the window. Our 4th-story window. Velvet was a spoilt little thing and had never really lived outside of a house, and consequently, died. My cousin? Didn't care. Just went away from the open window and went back to running around the house.
I came out only a few seconds later and was very confused as to just WHERE was the previously mewing cat, and obviously I couldn't just ask my cousin, since he can't talk and wouldn't be able to think of it either. My mom found the fucking CORPSE when she came back home. I was horrified and, while I don't think this was the proper thing to do to a little boy who has absolutely ZERO awareness of his surroundings, I proceeded to absolutely scream my head off at my cousin while grabbing his arm, which resulted in an absolute meltdown from him and my aunt (who had also just arrived) having to physically pry me off him as I was crying. I don't think I can be really blamed for being upset over my cousin KILLING my BELOVED PET just because he was born wrong. I also sort of yelled at my aunt to never come here or bring her son here ever again. My mother has severely chastised me for that and had ME grounded. What the fuck. Mental illnesses aren't all sunshine and rainbows, y'all. Ugh. I feel like I AM the asshole, but honestly. Consider the circumstances. I hate it here and I miss my fucking cat.
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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 7 months ago
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MDZS x Brazil (1985)
(Yes. Real movie dialogue)
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weekend-conspiracy-theorist · 7 months ago
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given cass's canonical love of reality tv, I am absolutely certain that every year babs has to go into cbs's recruitment email and delete her survivor audition video
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royalarchivist · 1 month ago
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Bad: I don’t think people understand the effect QSMP had on some of the streamers in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. [...] Imagine that you were given a friend to play Minecraft with — like your best friend — BUT if this person dies, if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Can you imagine what that’s like?
Bad: If you did not live through the QSMP, if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience the Eggs were. They were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with.
Bad: I’m not saying I regret it. To this day, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. [...] I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, it was just that fun.
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Earlier today during his stream, Bad shared his experience and thoughts about the Eggs and the significant emotional (and traumatic) impact they had on him and his fellow QSMP members.
This clip a very edited-down version since his commentary was ~13 minutes long, so I highly recommend checking out Bad's VOD if you have the time. (Timestamp: 47:36 - 1:00:14)
[ Full Transcript ↓ ]
———
Bad: To be fair Chat, I really think the QSMP... I don't think anyone really can relate to it, Chat. It's something that's so... I've told people this before, like– but it's hard to understand. Right? Like...
Where was I? Sorry Chat, I'm losing my train of thought. Look, let me explain Chat– here's the dealio, ok? Here's the dealio, and this is what I mean when I say like, it's important to keep this in mind, Chat. Ok? It's important to keep this in mind:
I don’t think people understand the effect that the QSMP had on like, some of the streamers, in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. This is the analogy I’ve given to every person who I’ve like, shared this with. Imagine you meet somebody– [He hears a strange noise] What the fudge was that? Did you hear that?
Anyway– Chip! The story I was just relaying to Chat, Chip, was this: I was sharing this story with them, I said–  I was giving them an analogy. 
Imagine Chat, for example, imagine that you were… playing Minecraft, with like– you were given a friend to play Minecraft with, Chat, like your best friend, and [unintelligible] were like, “Hey, you get to play Minecraft with this person, right? BUT if this person dies – they’re currently your best friend, Chip – but if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Ever again.” Can you imagine what that’s like, Chip?
I don’t think a lot of people understand like, what that does, right? I’m not gonna say that like, it creates this situation, Chip, that like, messes with your head, but it– Chip – but it totally, totally does, Chip. It messes with your head! It literally puts you in a position where you’re second-guessing and thinking about everything, Chip! You’re thinking about EVERYTHING Chip! Ok? And that’s the problem, Chip– is you turn into a paranoid monster because of it, Chip! Like, you don’t understand Chip– I was- I was so afraid of every dirt block, I used to carry a shovel with me Chip, and I would specifically right-click dirt blocks that looked suspicious because mines, Chip– mines could not be shoveled! Like, I was crazy, Chip! But here’s the problem, Chip: that craziness is still there. I’m genuinely like–
I remember thinking Chip, that I would one day– I was like, “I’m going to move past–” here, let’s go up here, Chip. I remember thinking one day Chip, I was like, “I’m gonna move past the underground base, one of these days. You know, one of these days, I feel like I’ll be able to grow and achieve the desire to build a base that doesn’t have to be underground.” But I don’t think it’s possible now Chip, because I think… I just don’t know. I feel like the paranoia– there’s still like, residual leftover trauma from that situation, Chip.
But here’s the problem Chip: I don’t think I don’t think– I don’t think people understand it. Like, I just really don’t. But I also don’t blame them Chip, ‘cuz I don’t think it’s possible to fully understand it if you haven’t lived through it. Like, if you did not live through the QSMP… I’m talking about the QSMP, I don’t- I don’t know if that was obvious– if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience like, the Eggs were. Right? I don’t think people realize it. Like, they were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with, Chip. So, it’s just one of those things that–
[He’s interrupted by a loud rumble of thunder above them]
Did lightning just strike here? Is it thunderstorming out…? But anyway, Chip. That’s the food for thought.
But that’s the problem– Like, every time it rains in Minecraft, I have to like, look at the sky, and I get this weird, like, second--hand vibe because of the trauma. The trauma, Chip! The trauma is real! But that’s the point– I’m not saying I regret it. I, to this day Chip, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. 
[He falls down] Dangit, don’t come over here Chip, ‘cuz I’m coming back up! Ok.
I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering  and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, Chip, it was just that fun. I really wi– I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible, Chip, to give people that same energy, like that same experience. You know what I mean, Chip? I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible again. Like, EVER.
Because… because like, one: I will say on one level Chip, I will say on one level, like– it’s sort of emotionally like… It’s emotionally devastating, and I think to actually go through that– and this is where like, if I ever do end up going to a– see a therapist, if I ever do end up going to see a therapist at any point, I’ll talk it over with them and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this?” Because I genuinely think on one level, like– it’s created this fear of forming attachments because of like, how things can go. You know what I mean? Like, the fear of getting attached to something and then potentially losing it. Like, it’s- it’s a genuine thing. I think people forget about that.
Like, at the end of the day, everything was RP, right? On the server. You know what I mean? Like, everything was RP, Chip. BUT at the same point, even though it was RP Chip, it was still like– there the reality of you were still playing like, with another person, and you were still getting that experience, and it felt like you were genuinely attached to someone and you didn’t want anything bad to happen to them. It was GENUINELY stressful, Chip.
But at the same point, I don’t regret it, and I don’t think it was a bad experience. I’m– 
Sometimes in life Chip, you go through stuff, and maybe you have a certain amount of like, things that like, can happen, that you’re like, “You know what, maybe this wasn’t a good thing that this happened,” but at the same point, you still aren’t necessarily upset about it, because… it’s like growing as a person, right? Here’s the thing Chip; even bad situations, Chip, can lead to an overall good outcome. Like–
Even if you’re going through something bad Chip, just because a bad thing happens doesn’t mean that only bad things have to come from that. That’s one of the things I tell people all the time, Chip, is that if you go through a bad situation, you can learn from it, and you can use your experience to help others. And you can be that– you can be, at the worst-case scenario, you can be someone for other people who are going through that same experience to lean on when they go through that.I think there’s a certain amount of comfort that comes from that; from knowing no matter how bad your situation is, you’re not the only person who’s experienced it. You know what I mean?
#Badboyhalo#BBH#Bad#QSMP#January 8 2025#Edited#I know folks are going to add their two cents on this subject in the tags / comments / replies (and as always you're welcome to do that)#But for the sake of my sanity please don't be an asshole to any of the CCs / ex-admins / fellow fans / anyone else. Thanks#Most folks here don't need a ''Don't be a dumbass'' reminder but I had to block someone for that earlier and it was a bit disappointing#This is going to be a Tumblr exclusive clip because I don't trust Twitter to have common sense or common decency about this topic#Tumblr exclusive#Anyways business aside – that black line on the side is just part of Bad's stream btw. He just Has That#Took too long for this to render otherwise I'd edit it out because it's annoying#I'm just realizing this screenshot doesn't even have Dapper OTL but it's the best one I have so I gotta work with what I got#Honestly; I still miss QSMP dearly... I love the core intent of the project and the multicultural exchange#I love all the language barriers that were broken and I loved all the stories that were told and watching beautiful friendships bloom#But I am still so angry and disappointed about how things ended and all the poor communication and the admin situation as a whole#It's a complicated feeling#I agree with pretty much everything Bad says here#It's ironic that he uses that analogy because I've said almost the exact same thing when explaining why losing any Egg was so devastating#We weren't just mourning for the characters. We were mourning for the admins too#I'll never forget that last stream with Tazercraft and Richas; and Pac ending stream in tears#I wish they'd done away with the Egg life system. I wish they'd done a lot of things differently#If the project ever does come back in some shape or form I hope they are more transparent about things and have better communication#I dunno how I'd feel personally. They would have to do a lot of work regaining people's trust#And frankly I don't think they'll ever regain that trust from a large portion of the community#I remember near the start of QSMP I saw a comment from a fan that simply said ''QSMP; please don't leave me feeling bitter''#I think about that comment a lot
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whatudottu · 5 months ago
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Me and the homies I dragged into playing ISAT with me (voice over style) and thus thoroughly infecting them with the ISAT hyperfixation gathered to play poker and so- drew us VAs as the cast give or take some liberties :P
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anassemblageofpassions · 6 months ago
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The thing abt john winchester is that he is too complex for the majority of the spn fandom and for a good portion of the writers on the show too.
Because at his core john is about love over everything else. When he looks up at his sons (yes, up, the fact that they’re both taller than him>>>>>), there is love seeping achingly from every single pore of his being even as he abuses them, as he destroys their souls beyond belief. He does it all entirely out of love. And he is so, so wrong for it. A part of him knows it. But he wants to keep dean alive, and he wants to keep Sam pure. And he loves them so much. And he damages them so horribly. John Winchester is the foundation upon which they are both built, they only become more of what he made them as the series goes on. Sam stops fighting it, Dean continues to mold into his image no matter how hard he tries to fight it.
Hell puts them both on steroids, but their individual trauma responses that influence this are the foundations that John built into them. No wonder azazel wanted sam to win so badly. John Winchester crafted his sons into alastair and Lucifer’s ideal victims, respectively, and dean was a better (worse) john than John ever was. John held out in hell. Dean acquiesced to his abuser despite all of his efforts to fight him, and he’s never been the same since.
Sam fought like hell, and he fought destiny, but at his core, he did what John always wanted him to by doing what dean wanted him to do, and then he stops fighting at all, loses the fire he showed john in adolescence that john immediately notices when he returns in s14.
And the sad thing is. They filled their roles so well that John is saddened by what they’ve become. He didn’t want dean to break. He didn’t want Sam to be dimmed. He’s sad to see what Sam is like in s14. In the process of recovering his wife, he ensured he would mold his sons into what he wanted them to be, and when he got what he wanted, he was devastated.
John Winchester is so driven by love and grief and he’s so filled to the brim with both that it’s painful to watch him on screen because he destroyed his family because of it. And he wanted this all along but he didn’t realize what he’d have to give up to get it.
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bacchuschucklefuck · 6 months ago
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one thing I really really appreciate abt riz gukgak as a character is that he is un-self-aware to the max. he inhabits his body so completely. the arc that would usually be run as "I'm different and unable to connect with my friends in this way that everyone seems to be able to do and so something's wrong with me and I don't like myself" when it comes to riz is actually like no! I have literally no problems or praises for myself personally. I don't stand outside of my own self and judge it. it's phrased as "other people will eventually find someone more important to them than you" rather than centering it on his self-perception. he doesn't know why he doesn't have the best social life on earth even though he's not afraid at all to talk to other people. every time he sees himself in someone else's actions or behaviour he gets startled by it. his latest epilogue is realizing seemingly for the first time that he's not just an agent of causes but an actual character. he's my hero and I want to be him when I grow up
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ivyithink · 19 days ago
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cheaploafs · 1 month ago
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no fights are ever won without sacrifice
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sernik-krakowski · 11 months ago
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break trio brainrot....
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premamelody · 4 months ago
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i think they'd be somewhat friends
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deerspherestudios · 11 months ago
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Can Mycheal fight? I know you’ve mentioned that he’s really strong and limber. But like, if someone decided to square up with him can he bust out the martial arts moves and fold them like Sunday laundry?
I can't imagine him going hand-to-hand with someone, but if he did it'd probably be a last resort. Something about his instincts kicking in and using teeth and nails to do some damage once he's pushed far enough.
He can take a good beating so I imagine he'd win through perseverance rather than brute strength and skill. Straight up he'd just last longer than his opponent in a fist-fight and just hopes the other party gives up eventually.
Like I've said plenty of times though, he's not one for violence, and would rather avoid conflict like that any chance he can.
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dykedvonte · 3 months ago
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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child-of-the-sea-and-sky · 4 months ago
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Rereading Skeleton Key in the Alex Rider series right now and just realized something
Artemis Fowl: Arctic Incident was published in May 2002
Alex Rider: Skeleton Key was published in July 2002
Both take place in Murmansk (specifically iirc they take place in the same submarine base)
so now I'm choosing to believe that both happened in-universe and this base is just very very unlucky to have first a twelve-year-old and then a fourteen-year-old boy fuck their shit up
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kacievvbbbb · 6 months ago
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I don't know which is more devasting. The idea that Mihawk and Shanks didn't see each other for a decade after thier breakuptm (which giving that they dueled almos daily for years someone had to have drastically changed their habits to avoid seeing the other)
or even despite all that and not for a lack of trying they just keep running into each other. That their fates are so horrribly enterwined, their yin and yang so bound to the other that despite their best efforts to the contrary it always brings them together again. On the same island in the same know nothing town pretending the other doesn't exist. Because Shanks is a captain on the come up he has a whole crew a burgeoning fleet and territories he can't just drop everything to chase after a petulant swordsman. And if Mihawk can't fight shanks then he can't see Shanks.
And god the tragedy of that of knowing that they are there on the other side of this island because you've known from the moment they arrived. But knowing better/refusing to do anything about it.
On the other hand I do also love the idea that whenever they do run into each other they get into these intense arguments and Mihawk and Shanks have always been prone to fighting but not like this. Because at the end of the day Mihawk and Shanks are both very immature people Shanks is prone to deflecting and distracting to avoid the problem while Mihawk is prone to just completely shutting down when any strong emotions are involved or when he feels like he is not being understood, until he just bursts out in a flurry of rage filled meanness and wrath with a body trail a mile long. And so they just go at each other and the situation is too delicate to thorn filled for Beckman to mediate and so he separates them at least to preserve the integrity of the island they are all presently on.
And then Mihawk goes off and takes his anger out on a marine base cause the pirates have all learned to steer clear of him.
I just think it brings new meaning to Shanks posturing when Mihawk first pulls up on him a decade later. That "you come here for a fight" is a real question and not just playful banter because obviously Shanks doesn't like fighting with Mihawk but why else would he be here? It's why mihawk's little comment doesn't diffuse the tension until he mentions luffy's poster. He is literally and figuratively extending an Olive branch and Shanks couldn't be happier to take it
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