#I know exactly how these people function because I was there once...
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So I made a post theorising about Style before episode 1 dropped and I'm both pleased by how much I got right and enamoured by all the extra details we have about Style in this episode.
Style is so obnoxiously overconfident and full of undeserved swagger that it somehow flips around to being winsome. He's the very definition of "empty-headed" but in a way that makes him innocent and guileless.
Narratively he functions as a bit of a foil to Bison because they are both impulsive and naive and blunt, but where Bison's past is steeped in blood and deception and it feels like he's got tricks up his sleeve, Style is an almost painfully open book. This also stands in contrast to Kant who seems very capable of manipulation.
And while he's nearly annoyingly self-assured, who can blame him; I mean look at him. Pretty boy is so fucking pretty. I bet he rocks up to the club, leans with his back against the bar so his shirt rides up, and immediately has 3 drinks being offered to him.
I'm so glad the show makes it clear that Style was flirting with Fadel well before the deal with Kant. It both establishes how genuine his interest in Fadel is, whilst also telling us that the unhinged behaviour was all Style - he didn't need any incentive to pull the "my nipples are sensitive" line.
I also love how he's demonstratively SO BAD at flirting! At the diner, its clear he's just trying things out to see if anything will stick. He's dressed to make himself alluring: arms and side bared in that loose tank top, and he keeps making these big gestures that show his arms off. (I wonder if he drinks as much as he does partly because he starts to get nervous when nothing seems to be working. xD)
All this is good, though, specifically because Fadel would probably see more sophisticated moves as deception. Instead, I think Style's unpolished and unpredictable flirting winds up being accidentally effective because it leaves Fadel feeling unmoored.
Fadel, who is so in control of his life; who (thinks he) knows exactly what he wants and how to get it. Style makes him feel things he probably hasn't in a while. Attraction, embarrassment; but also, anger and violence. His little dramatic knife-clench moment is such a contrast to the calm, clinical way he assassinates the mob boss and I think it shows that Fadel feels his lack of control around Style - and that frightens him a little.
I like how the show signposts the ways both characters are going to have to grow as people for them to be in a relationship: Style needs to learn how to take things more seriously, to mature and temper that arrogance, and slow down and read the room/people better; Fadel needs to allow himself to let go sometimes, to have some fun for once, to face and accept the reality of his own emotions.
They both have to learn how to love and be loved, and its fascinating how ideally suited they are to teach each other these things.
And in the mean time, well, the chemistry is undeniably electric.
#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#thk meta#fadelstyle#style#fadel#style is nearly everything i wanted for this character#and dunk is doing an amazing job of portraying the balance between genuine confidence and annoying swagger#i'm intrigued about his dynamic with his dad and how that will play into things later (if it does at all)#style is the most Unserious because he balances out all the weight of the other 3 characters#yes he's the comic relief and in a show about murder and deception and betrayal he's very necessary esp for the genre we're in#all the other characters are playing 4D chess and style is just here like: so we're here to play Uno right?? ^_^#it became about fadelstyle at the end but i really do just adore style as a character in his own right too#joongdunk#dunk natachai#rambles about shows i'm watching#<my posts>
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The Girl With the Smile: Chapter One
Pairing: Arthur Shelby x Tilly (OFC)
Warnings: Mention of drinking, alcoholism, language, typical period attitude, sexism, depression, mental illness.
Word Count: 1.8
Story Summary: Matilda "Tilly" Swanson was a klutz who never really wanted to be a maid. Arthur Shelby was a manic wreck who never wanted the maid to begin with. What happens when a miserable old sod starts to find comfort in his younger and silly maid?
Chapter Summary: Arthur isn't very happy when Tommy brings over a young woman. To him, he's fine and just wants to be left alone.
Please enjoy! Reblogs and comments encouraged.
“Arthur, look at you!” Tommy Shelby could be described as a functional mess, but Arthur Shelby was a functional nothing. Scattered about the floor of his darkened parlor lay empty whiskey bottles, discarded cigarettes that the ashtray could no longer hold, and broken things that Tommy couldn’t identify. Tommy covered his nose with his handkerchief, eyes scanning around before landing on his brother. “You’re a bloody fookin’ disaster. How do you function in this filth, eh?” Tommy kicked the wooden leg of the red velvet chair his brother rested on; slumped and decaying in his own aroma.
Arthur gurgled out a train of incomprehensible gibberish. “Wha-s-ye-wan’, Aye?!” Fetal position, he curled up with the bottle of rum, turning himself so as to not look at Tommy. “Fook off!” That was clear. His trousers were soiled, shit stained, and hair unkempt. His stubble almost matched his mustache in length.
“Now, Arthur!” Tommy removed his cigarette from his lips and rubbed it out in the ashtray, adding it to the ground. His brother wasn’t hardly a smoker, but he assumed that he must have taken it up when Linda left. “It’s been three fookin’ weeks now-”
“Fuck off-”
“In a minute, eh?” Neither brother wanted to deal with the pathetic situation at hand, but Tommy feared if he let it go any longer, Arthur would bloody off himself. “I think I have been quite patient in terms of…of whatever this fuckin’ is.” From behind Tommy, the door opened a crack, and the slight bit of sunlight left of the day peeked through. Tommy shot a look behind him, and said, “I told you to stay outside-”
“I know!” A soft, young voice spoke suddenly. Arthur grunted, shifting a bit and squinting towards the door. Through the slightly opened mahogany door, slipped in a young woman, delicately, but simply dressed. With gloved hands, she gripped a small suitcase that held no more than a few sacred belongings. Both men looked at her for a minute, and she quickly apologized, taking off her hat. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t wear such a thing inside, but now my hair is quite messy and wow, I just…wow.” Once she registered the sight before her, she took a step back and slowly looked up at Tommy with a gaped mouth. “Mr. Shelby-”
“I’ll pay you fifteen pounds instead!” Quickly, Tommy jumped over to her, gently touching her arms. “Fifteen pounds, a good more than you got working for me, eh?” He grinned, pinching at her chin. His grin slowly dropped as he let out a sigh of exhaustion. It wasn’t an ideal situation. What maid wanted to be a babysitter, housekeeper, and cook all for one smelly, distraught, and difficult man? “C’mon, fifteen pounds, eh?” He tried, tapping her arms. She offered a sympathetic smile, right shoulder shrugging a bit. “Alright, alright. Twenty pounds. That’s double the national average!”
Hand motioning to Arthur, who had passed out sometime within the mix of conversation. Sympathetically, she said, “Mr. Shelby, I’m grateful, but your brother isn’t exactly known for being easy. That’s why Sandra and Clara rejected the offer-”
“And you didn’t because you’re a hard worker!” As his hand hit harder against her arm, she winced. “And you are good with people, Miss. Swanson.” The maid eased her shoulders and nodded, pushing her suitcase to the cleanest spot she could find. “Arthur!” Tommy kicked the leg of the chair once again, that time hard enough it almost dug the drunken fool out of his inebriated state. Jumping up, he yelled out, thrashing and seething. “Arthur!” Tommy yelled again, pushing his older brother down in the chair. “This is Miss. Swanson.” Arthur could hardly find her through his double vision. Squinting, he grumbled a few words that neither made sense nor were relevant. “I’ve taken her from my own team of maids-”
“I-ish wan’ no mai’.”
She blinked. “I’m sorry, I don’t speak Romani. English?”
Tommy swallowed, dryly stating, “that was English.”
“Oh.”
“Fuckin’ ‘ell, Arthur!” Tommy picked his brother up straight and made him sit like a normal human being. “You be kind to Miss. Swanson, you understand me? Hm?” Pinching his cheeks, Tommy leaned in. “She’s goin’ to ‘elp ya’ around here, alright? Make sure you’re keeping clean, eating, showering, getting your fuckin’ arse to work! Three Goddamn weeks, Arthur! Haven’t come to bloody fuckin’ work in three fookin’ weeks.” He and Arthur wrestled for a moment over the whiskey bottle. Tommy tried to pull the bottle away, but Arthur kept it close to his chest with a grip stronger than anything. “Alrigh’, fine! Fuckin’ have the bottle, but until you can fuckin’ shower and shave, you’re off the bottle, eh? No more!”
He walked over to her, tired of it. She hesitantly looked over at the sunken man and then to Tommy. “Are you sure I should stay here…alone?” Motioning to him, she continued, “I mean, he’s a bit neurotic. What if he…I don’t know, hurts me?”
Tommy sighed. “My number is on the phone. If I don’t pick up, I’ve left numerous other numbers. He won’t hurt you-”
“You didn’t say that with confidence, exactly, Mr. Shelby.”
“He’s never hurt a woman,” he corrected before adding, “never before. He’s small. Um, not much to him. You can take him. Believe in yourself, eh? I’m counting on you.” As he stood above her, cupping her cheeks, and leaning down. “Tilly,” he said, affectionately. “Mr. Shelby is counting on you.” Giving in, she offered a little smile, the rounds of her cheeks turning red. “I couldn’t ask anyone, but you.”
“Alright, Mr. Shelby,” she agreed. “Twenty pounds a month, thirty pound bonus upfront-”
“Don’t get ahead of yourself, eh-”
“But you couldn’t ask anyone, but me, remember?” She grinned, a little twinkle in her eyes. Tommy sighed, pulling away and reaching into his wallet, digging out ten, mumbling how he’d supplement the other twenty. “Don’t worry…they say you should always high ball a man, not low ball.” Tommy Shelby couldn’t even be angry at that. It was as if she was beating him at his own game. All that stuff he said was simply a trick to get her to stay. Tilly, in fact, was the last maid he wanted to ask; clumsy, oblivious, and a bit…unruly. But he adored the girl in some way or another.
“Spend it wisely,” he said, a slight sarcastic undertone as he fixed his hat. He nodded to the girl and affectionately touched her shoulder in passing as he left. The door closed behind her with a quick swift bang, it echoed throughout the home.
When the silence returned and the room felt still, she looked over at the man, slumped over in the chair. “Well then,” she said, with a smile, clasping her gloved hands. “Why don’t we open some windows?” she offered, and waited for any sign of life. But he was cold. Out cold. Cautiously, she took slow, careful strides towards him. “Never in my life,” she whispered, studying how he cuddled the half-drunk bottle and slept with a gaped mouth, a stream of drool hitting the arm of the chair. Outreaching her gloved hand, she poked him. “Alright, you!” Poke, poke, poke. On the third poke, they scared each other. Arthur shot awake, thrashing the bottle about, hollering in a drunken state while Tilly jumped back finding refuge behind the matching velvet sofa.
“The fook is ‘ere?!” he yelled, dropping the bottle. Tilly gasped as glass shattered and rum splashed. When he saw no one, he allowed himself to mourn. “Me fookin’ bottle. Last fookin’ one.”
Tilly slowly peered over the couch, eyes wide. “Mr. Shelby?”
“OI!” Quickly, he looked over, their eyes connecting. “Are you a whore?” he managed to get out, perhaps a little hopeful.
“N-no, I’m not,” she said, slowly standing, hands palms up. Cautiously, they watched one another as she walked around the sofa. “Your brother, Thomas, hired me to clean your home. Thought you’d need some help-”
“Fuck off,” he said, throwing himself back on the chair, refusing to look at her. “And tell him to fook right off, too. Sick of the lot of ya, can’t leave me alone.”
Tilly knew he’d be difficult, but she overestimated her patience for it. Swallowing, she winced. “Well, um-”
“Well what!? Get it out, eh?”
“I can’t leave,” she explained. “I can’t leave, and well, for one, you live quite from from where I’d need to go and I don’t drive. And there’s no car.” She stopped talking, deciding that it was useless. “How about this!? We can open some blinds and let some sunlight in. I suppose some brightness would do you well.” She walked over to a curtain covered window and pulled it open, allowing the last bit of sunlight to come through. It brightened the place immediately. She was quite shocked to find that everything was not black, but indeed varying different colors. “You see, Mr. Shelby, doesn’t it look much better already?”
But like a bear who hadn’t seen sunlight for a winters time, he hissed out, covering his eyes. “Woman! The bloody ‘ell are you doing to me?!”
“Oh please,” she said, walking to the other window, pulling the curtain. “A little sunlight will be good for you. Then I can start cleaning up this mess. Perhaps make you a quick supper. You’ll need some food with all that alcohol in you. You’re just withering away.”
“I wish I would wither away right now,” he mumbled under his breath. “I want you to leave, Miss. Just leave and go wherever. Don’t have any bloody need for a woman that isn’t blowing me cock-”
“Vile,” she commented, pursing her lips together. She had just picked up a broom to clean the shattered glass, but she immediately put it down. “Alright, if you are just going to be that bloody stubborn, I will call your brother to come pick me up. But I warn you, Mr. Shelby, he won’t be very happy-”
“Well, he can fuck on off, too-”
“And he did,” she snipped, walking to the phone and picking up the ear piece. Tilly looked back as her finger dialed around the numbers. “And he left me here with your sorry arse. You’re a miserable one, aren’t you? And to think I remembered you kinder at one point…Hello! Mr. Shelby?”
On the other end, Tommy Shelby rubbed his temple. She hardly lasted as long as he thought. “Yes, Tilly,” he said, dropping all sense of formality. “Put him on the phone.”
Tilly called to Arthur. “Your brother would like to speak with you.” There was a groan and a crack of joints as the man slowly lifted from the chair. Wobbling over, he grabbed the phone and slammed it down. “That was quite-”
“Let me show you to your room,” he said, cutting her off. “It’s either I listen to him or I listen to you, and I’m tired of listening to him for forty bloody fuckin’ years.”
Taglist: @lau219 @vivianleighwishesshewasme @wonderlanddreamer @mysatnin @umbrielchip000
@hollyluvseveryone4ever13
@lilvampirina
@jaymcdowell
@kmc1989
@lilladygrinningsoul @fiercelittlemouse @peakyswritings @runnning-outof-time @brummiereader
#Tommy Shelby#Arthur Shelby#Peaky Blinders#Original female character#ofc#oc#fanfic#fanfiction#peaky blinders oc#arthur shelby x ofc#arthur shelby fanfiction#arthur shelby x oc
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"Jotaro Kujo is Weak at His Core"
As a writer and avid character psycho-analyzer, I find this concept fascinating because I wholeheartedly agree with what OP has quoted from a "What opinion would get the community to do this? *Insert Johnny getting torn apart*" post.
Before I begin, I know some people will see this, misread it, and immediately say "lmao did we watch the same show? He's strong, badass, and can kick anyone's ass. Like do you know Star Platinum bro?". Trust me, I've seen the replies to this post and they said this same exact thing.
And I'm here to say that to said people, if you truly are not the illiterates I'd like to term you as, you'd take the time to realize that when we say "he's weak", we're not referring to his physical prowess because we know he's one of the strongest characters in the show.
If you don't like to, then you're just proving the accuracy of the last sentence: "You can't stand seeing your edgy badass image of Jotaro as vulnerable."
Pushing that aside, I'd like to expand on OP's opinion/headcanon with some depth to it and explain how exactly he's "weak" outside of being a skilled and strategic fighter.
I've learned that to be holistically healthy, one needs to develop and maintain all optimal functions of oneself: Physical, Emotional, Social, and Mental.
Obviously, Jotaro excels in the physical category. He's conventionally attractive, taller than the average male population, well-defined with a muscled build, fit as hell, street and book smart, and highly in tune with his environment making him adaptable in any circumstance.
He's "strong" in that aspect we all know at a superficial level.
However, we start to see the core problem once we strip this good-hearted man of his physical appeal:
Emotional? He believes he doesn't need to express them to others because why should he. He refuses to process them and instead keeps them behind a locked wall of stoicism and aloofness.
Social? Can't communicate to save his life. He's reclusive and doesn't know how to socialize outside of work. Guarded and skeptical around others. Too much of a workaholic to bother making new acquaintances (if he even knows how) outside of familial connections.
Mental? At 17, he went on a death crusade over Asia and the Middle East, almost died numerous times, and most likely lived with unresolved PTSD that carried over into adulthood, and further deteriorated his already poor social and emotional skills.
What do we have then? If we look past that powerful exterior of a man, we have inappropriate emotional expression, poor socialization, and constant fatigue of dealing with bullshit that relates to his trauma.
And this is what we mean by his "core": His mindset. His inner machinations. The soft spot his enemies would need to target in order to defeat or kill him, strategy-wise.
I. Emotional
We pretty much already know how this man handles emotions. And this may come off as "irrelevant" to the dudebros and the meme riders who believe "haha feelings are for pussies, I advocate for edgy autistic Florida man who don't give a fuck, elopes with dolphins, and berates women".
But believe it or not, he has them, just like any other human being on the planet. I said it once and I'll say it again: Not everyone will wear their heart on their sleeves. Some will convey emotions publicly with no issue, while others would prefer to keep to themselves.
But how does this contribute to him being "weak" at his core?
Essentially, it's similar to how someone with depression may behave (not everyone, some of them). One may appear friendly, sunny, and bubbly to everyone around them, not knowing they're actually suffering from a void that eats them up from the inside when alone.
For his case, it may look like he doesn't care about what happens to him and everyone around him, considering his nonchalant and aloof behavior, but beneath that cold exterior, he cares way too much for his family, friends, and allies. He feels too much to the point where once his allies are endangered, he would sacrifice his well-being without a second thought.
And that's an issue to him.
To him, emotions make him vulnerable and in his circumstance where enemies are actively hunting him down trying to find his weak spots, his emotions should be kept behind doors because he doesn't know how to regulate it on the outside so it's either total stoicism or lashing out.
I found someone saying this line about him that fits him so well: "He's a good person who doesn't know how to be a good person."
This is a man who means well and truly wants to help out of the goodness of his heart, but because of his inability to convey his emotions properly and is unable to pick up emotional cues, it can lead to shit tons of misunderstandings due to inappropriate tone & expression, and that can change how someone views him in the long run, thus leading to unintended deterioration of personal relationships (which contribute to the social aspect of his weakness).
The emotionally-reserved character here with the poor communication skills is the girl. She's a CEO who just received a call, came out from work, and meets with her husband, asking him to accompany her to a doctor's appointment.
I found a visual representation of what I just said above. Just to give context: The show is about a married couple who struggles to keep their relationship afloat, having to navigate through family politics, work & life balance, and miscommunications so they could find why they loved each other in the first place.
Observe how she thinks she views herself VS how others actually view her as.
Other's POV: Demanding, brash, and insensitive Her POV: Anxious, hesitant, and confused
Now remember what Araki had written about Jotaro? "He doesn't believe he must reveal his emotions to others because he thinks everyone can figure him out, leading him to be a victim of misunderstandings. Others think him to be cold-hearted, rebellious, and insensitive."
II. Social
With emotions as our base foundation to poor communication skills, this leads us to his weak socialization aspect.
In a recent quote reblog about how he was raised as a child may have contributed to his tough persona, I mentioned something about his need of "Security".
Growing up, it was mostly just him and his sweet pacifist mother Holly. Joseph couldn't have visited often (he hates Japan) and his dad is a busy musician with a packed schedule on tour. As a kid up to early adolescence, he was coddled by his mother and raised as a good student. Everything was going great for him.
[In popular headcanon] Once he passed puberty, the change to his Part 3 MC era began. People began picking fights with him and bullying him, and he began to see the world as a threat to his safety. Knowing his mother, he wouldn't rely on her to defend him against these dangers. She was too kind, too friendly, too loving for her to deal with the harsh life he now has to deal with.
So he had to be the stronger one for both of them. He already had the physical attributes for it, so why not use it to his advantage?
He got on the popular delinquent trend back in 80's Japan, integrated a couple of cool masculine-esque personalities as his own from his favorite Western and Crime media, and is then able to project this menacing aura everyone should be afraid of, to ward potential threats away from him and his mother.
But Mijin, how does this make him weak? What does this have to do with his need for security?
Think about it: The poor guy's already introverted, doesn't feel comfortable with his emotions that he can't express properly, and now he has to be skeptical with people around him because he realized how shitty society can be, which leads to intimidation that wards off not only potential foes but potential friends as well, making it look like he's anti-social.
On the outside, people are likely to think that he likes being this way when in reality, he seeks a reliable support system on which he can lean onto. Everyone with a sound mind wants that subconsciously because we are social creatures. It's part of our nature.
He's constantly fearful of his surroundings, growing even more vigilant as he ages, but he doesn't look afraid because he chooses to put on a brave face to challenge said fears instead of acknowledging he's scared. I read somewhere in an ask that's not mine that in the manga, some panels actually depict Jotaro shaking/trembling in a mix of fear and adrenaline during some of his fights.
He wants to be around people who he can trust. People who he can lower his defenses with. People who are capable of protecting him just as he is capable of protecting them. People who can face his intimidating aura and challenge it to stand on equal grounds with him or to remind him of his place when he goes too far with certain things. Hence, why he seems comfortable being with the Crusaders.
For once, he wants to feel safe.
To not feel like he has to be this strong pillar of hope that everyone depends on.
To be someone being protected, instead of the other way around where he was always the strong protector. He wants a life of normalcy where he can just be a marine biologist and a professor with a loving family he can come home to.
But that can't happen. The inner circle of friends he counted on is either dead or far away, leaving him even more fearful of the world around him. This results in even more guarded skepticism, always watchful of who's an enemy Stand user and what their Stand could do. Because of his cautious nature, this leads to minimized socialization with others.
With little to no solid support system he can count on, he has no one he feels completely secure with because he believes danger will always come to hurt and/or kill those near him. He doesn't want to burden others with the issues & responsibilities of dealing with Stand users. He wants them to live the normal life he could no longer have.
He doesn't trust in the capabilities of his loved ones when it comes to defending themselves against the amount of potential threats and dangers he has faced, and yet he cares about them dearly. So, he commits to what seems to be the most practical solution in his mind: Self-Isolation.
To be a distant beacon where danger is attracted to and away from those dear to him.
(As we see in the beginning of Part 3 where he willingly locks himself in jail as soon as he sees himself as the threat, and in Part 6 where he stays away from his family once he realizes his enemies were targeting him).
"Your family is your weakness."
All this leads him to become what Araki always envisioned him to be: A lone hero.
III. Mental
Now onto the last part, this part of the essay will focus more on the popular headcanon the community has made about him: "Jotaro has PTSD."
Considering what he's been through at only 17, it would be no surprise that he'd acquired major trauma after those 50 days. Think about it- he gets injured more times than he can count, almost dies numerous times, sees his grandfather get "killed" in front of him, and all this combined with the constant reminder that his mother's life is also on a time limit. A failure to kill DIO meant a failure to save Holly.
The amount of pressure and risk he had to endure for her (and there will still be people who adamantly believe that he hated Holly because he said "bitch" to her twice in the first two episodes).
Now, remember when I said about him having this mentality of over-independence when dealing with stressors? It was still manageable during Stardust Crusaders, but because of what had transpired in Cairo, that mindset carries on to the rest of his adulthood, more so if we consider that he most likely didn't get any therapy or treatment for his trauma.
It might be normal for a teenager to hold onto this stubborn notion of "I can do this by myself" and it's all casual, but with trauma now involved, that notion warps into a persisting belief of "by doing this myself, no one else will get hurt" (i.e. refusing help, doing solo fieldwork, self-isolation).
But Mijin, you keep saying "mentality" this, "mindset" that. What are you talking about?
There's an old Tumblr post I found that talks specifically about this in great detail, but to put it shortly: Jotaro has always wanted to do things by himself because he believes that not only will the task be done with, there would be no one else involved with it, making it better for him to cope mentally if ever shit hits the fan (tying back to poor emotional expression and insecurity in bonds).
If any injuries were to be inflicted, he would be the one to receive them, and he alone, because who knows how he'll react and/or cope when his allies are harmed instead of him over and over again? (refer to the trauma of Jotaro surviving Cairo while the majority of the team that went with him died a.k.a "survivor's guilt")
(Also, refer to how he had exhibited great distress when Jolyne was about to be struck by a rain of knives that Pucci sent)
This might also be the reason why he's more self-sacrificial as an adult: Will be the bait during the rat episode instead of Josuke, takes the brunt of Sheer Heart Attack's explosion to spare Koichi, dives straight onto a path of bullets to save Jolyne, etc.
The only possible solution so he could snap out of that belief he holds on to is that strong, reliable support system he internally needs. People who can help him without sustaining fatal injuries in the process [social]. People who he can approach to release any pent-up frustrations and inner conflicts [emotional].
If he had found those people, then he might have been able to deal and/or cope with his trauma better instead of letting it linger and change his outlook in life [mental].
But we all know how his life went in canon. One moment he's a kid playing ball with his mother, then in his last, he dies by having his head bisected by a time-altering Stand.
Jotaro is a person with a gold heart and a rough exterior. Someone who wants to help and protect his loved ones from the unpredictability of the world the best that he can. But even then, his best wasn't enough. His fear was masked with an air of strength and capability, perhaps as compensation for everything else he lacked:
Adequate processing of emotions.
Stable connection with familial, platonic, and romantic bonds.
A sound mindset that stems from effective coping for his PTSD.
We could only hope in headcanon land that he had a better chance at life in the Ireneverse where he finally could develop his inner core better and get that long-deserved break he had always wanted.
#can't you already tell I love this man?#not in a romantic yumeship sense but in a “let me study you under the microscope” sense#mischaracterize my pookie and you'll hear me thundering through the streets#jojos bizarre adventure#jjba#jotaro kujo#mijin thoughts
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Whenever I see someone being transphobic on twt in a bridget thread i reply with three pictures of my mains: ky kiske from ac+r, ky kiske from rev 2, and ky kiske from strive.
it self selects for people who actually play the game. it’s canon that he’ll fight off transphobes with the blade. and if they actually played guilty gear they’d get the underlining messages
While it can be really funny to bully these guys back, please keep in mind that nothing you can say or do to these people will hurt them or waste as much of their time as what they say will stick with you or waste your time. It might be funny to send them a bunch of Ky pictures, but what they're doing is laughing that the only response the people they hate can give them is sending a bunch of pictures of anime boys.
The only thing that works is blocking them. They've turned being an asshole into a recreational sport and getting any sort of response in return is a victory for them.
#asks#Unfortunately I was an asshole on the internet once (not a vicious transphobe just a basic internet asshole)#I know exactly how these people function because I was there once...#When you don't take the person you're arguing with seriously it's very easy to laugh at every single thing they do#Which is what these guys are doing. It doesn't matter how well thought out the counter argument is. They don't care and they won't care#All you can hope for is that they're young and they grow out of it (I did)#I feel bad for them because I think about what led to me being like that decades ago. Are they going through the same thing?#I was like that because I was in a hopeless situation and hated myself and hated everyone else#People arguing back just proved my point that everything sucked and my hate was justified#It's an awful feedback loop. People being kind to me felt disingenuous. Why should they be kind? I hated them. They had no reason to be nic#I had to get to a point where I was willing to help myself crawl out of that pit before I let anyone else even get near me emotionally#I still remember the day when I realized I was being a fucked up little shit to everyone lol#Early June 2011. It was sunny with no clouds and there was a cool breeze. I was listening to In This Moment and I realized#'What the hell am I doing? Do I want to be like this forever? Get your shit together man'#It was a slow process from there but I did get out of it. Slowly. Very slowly.#There's a lot I did that I regret and can't ever apologize for because it was so long ago and the names and faces are gone now#Apologizing at this point would be selfish and only for my benefit anyway. I can only hope that what I did didn't hurt people permanently#Anyway. I've never talked about this on here before because it's the kinda shit that gets put on callout posts out of context#So. I am laying my naked soul bare and raw for the sake of underlining my original point: Internet trolls don't care
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I think if Blade ever does send a text directly it should be a single sentence of the most basic kind, and then it never happens again.
#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr blade#hsr stelle#stelle seems pretty casual blowing up the stellaron hunters' phones by now#though she seems to text silver wolf the most casually#can't get an answer to that funny meme she found? time to try all the other phones#i do think blade never texting is a pretty fun thing so i don't want to create too many texts from him#but since boothill showed that speech to text exists as a function#i want to hope this could happen#exactly once#just to show that he knows how to do it#and then never again#because he's an old man and why would he bother when everyone else already answers all the texts he gets for him anyway#silver wolf a few hours later still from blade's phone: nobody will ever believe you#stelle who already took five screenshots and saved them in three separate cloud storages: bet#ray's records#this is the other one i made#i don't think i'll make blade ones after this or it'll be rare ones and with the other stellaron hunters only#but i really think he doesn't really text#speech to text if he really needs to get a message out#but otherwise he just reads what other people send him#or he calls#texting with those hands is too hard#speech to text is a hassle he doesn't usually bother with#grandpa and the plain black case of his work phone
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Astrology observations #5🖤
🌜I wrote these for fun, based on how i see these placements. i'm not a professional! hope you enjoy these🌛
⭐cancer placements allow themselves to feel their emotions. they may get annoyed by the intensity or the amount of them, but they process them fully, and this makes it easier for them to move on. random thought but writing letters to people they like may be something they do or did as kids haha. they're very romantic
⭐some aries venuses have obsessive tendencies when they have a crush, and they get frustrated a lot if they think they can't/shouldn't pursue them. they enjoy the tension, but they don't want it to last too long because they dislike not being in control, and having feelings for someone leaves them feeling too vulnerable. that's why they try to move on if they can, but it takes work. when they do find someone, they become really clingy but they still need freedom when it suits them
⭐mars in libra avoid conflicts and try to be reasonable about everything, but if they think you crossed a line, you'll see why aries is their sister sign pretty soon. once they tell you off, you'll never see them the same way, so underrestimate them at your cost
⭐having stelliums can be interesting. it for sure puts a lot of emphasis on the influence of that house on your life, and i found that it can be both positive and negative since they face lots of challenges related to their house but also many blessings. those who have stelliums kind of embody multiple characteristics simultaneously
⭐sun in the 11th people glow when they are with their closest friends. they also tend to dream big and care a lot about the world. their friends usually help them in their future goals. they feel a bit different than people in their hometown/country, mostly because they cannot be tied down to a single culture because they enjoy different things, which usually makes them quite open-minded and tolerant. they can be picky about the people they let in super close though
⭐mars in the 6th can procrastinate a lot actually, but they get things done. may get sudden waves of high energy and get things done rapidly and extensively. they expect a lot from themselves regarding their ambitions and aspirations. they try to improve themselves in any way most of the time, but they should also accept their current state if they want to evolve and love themselves. they need to watch out for their moral perfectionism too. it's okay to make mistakes as long as you apologise and strive to change for the better
⭐i've found that virgo mercuries can be really direct, even if they are shy or don't talk much around strangers or acquaintances, they have their moments. super funny too
⭐north node in cancer struggle with accepting their vulnerable side. they hate feeling like things and people can evoke strong emotions in them. they want to be more detached, but those that work on themselves find it very rewarding once they embrace their strong emotions. they can also be really reliable, practical, and thoughtful
⭐fire+water combinations in birth charts-i am sending you a hug. i know exactly how difficult it is to keep all those emotions under check, and that you need a lot of understanding and rest to function. use those emotions and passions well hun, you are strong and capable. you have a lot of empathy and wonder inside of you
⭐capricorn sun/mercury have a dry way of texting. their humor is difficult to read via text and they simply are not fans of texting, and it shows lol
⭐aries mercuries are not always available online and they may come and go when they're online, but they'll answer all of your messages one by one with lots of enthusiasm. they also like to send memes and joke around a lot
⭐virgo mercuries are not fans of texting and they can answer you after a couple of days or so even if they really like you. similarly to aries, they'll make sure they answer everything and they also pay attention to every detail you mention. very sweet really. their humor shines brighter in person
⭐taurus moon are very capable. they may prefer rest over anything else, but their patience and dedication to the things they need to do is really cool. they are calm most of the time so it's nice to be around them, just don't disrespect them and everyone will thrive
⭐taurus venus men can be really possessive. even if you like such behavior, some can go to extremes and try to control how you feel, think, and behave. they have a specific image of an ideal partner and they want you to fulfill it
⭐libra venus tend to care about how they look and present themselves so they put lots of effort into that. they also have standards when it comes to beauty and some expect others to dress and look well, whether they know them or not
⭐women with venus in aquarius-you may be attracted to men who are mysterious and act like they're special. just be careful because there are so many toxic ones out there who want a relationship but not truly, because they don't want to dedicate themselves to you and maybe plan on using you
⭐pisces moon can feel like they're drowning in their own emotions sometimes because they cannot control them easily and they tend to give in. if they like to portray themselves as a martyr these emotions can get out of hand because they let those emotions lead them which influences their mental health and relationships. those who are developed process these emotions and try to figure them out and let them pass. they can learn a lot about themselves and others this way. creative outlets can be of help to process this
⭐leo moon need to watch out for hurting people when their ego is hurt because they can lash out and make lots of damage. take a second to think whether it's worth it or not, since there is no point in trying to "win" in a fight with someone you love
⭐pisces mars can be too forgiving, especially to those they care about. don't let people walk over you dear, no matter who they are. nobody deserves that kind of treatment
thank you for reading!🤍i also offer paid astrology readings, so check out my blog for more info
©rosesnbooks
#astrology#astrology observations#astro observations#dividers credit goes to cafekitsune#rosesnbooks#photos from pinterest by yuya and R41N#this one feels more personal than others perhaps so i hope i won't insult anyone#i just like my observations to be more nuanced. i usually look at the positive sides so this one is a bit darker. hope you don't mind
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[ " 𝐋𝐎𝐎𝐊 𝐇𝐎𝐖 𝐂𝐔𝐓𝐄 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐀𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆! " ] — 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬
𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): luffy, robin, law, sanji, kidd × gn!reader 𝐢𝐧𝐟𝐨/𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬: not proofread 'n quick, lots of fluff! they are all babies. (i KNOW kidd's crew raid fashion stores and complain about them if they're lackin. if. if there's a fic like that pls share in the comments. i BEG you.) also some swearing with kidd!! dripping divider by @ benkeibear like always,, i live for these dividers damn.
𝐌𝐎𝐍𝐊𝐄𝐘 𝐃. 𝐋𝐔𝐅𝐅𝐘
"you too!!"
you swear his smile widens so much his face is stuck that way.
he is adorable. he smiles every day but hearing you say that? it's exactly what he wants!! he wants people to look at him smiling AND wants them smiling in the process (continuous cycle,,)
it's so easy to notice just how much he loves you saying that. round cheeks tinted pink, eyes shut, and set of teeth shared to the world. he is always so animated with everything he does, and this is no exception.
this little rubber man is immediately engulfing you in his arms!! you are not allowed to leave until he says so.
"i'm gonna make you smile too! forever! that way, we'll both look cute when we smile! shishishi!"
scratch protecting him at all costs. he's gonna protect you at all costs.
if you tell him again, grab his cheeks and shake him as if he were a pupper. if he had a tail it'd be wagging 'till he flies. will probably make all types of noises while you do it.
pat the boi.
𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐎 𝐑𝐎𝐁𝐈𝐍
her smile might be tender but she's giggling internally,, she's flattered!!
"is that so? i'm glad to hear that."
robin gained confidence growing up and she knew she was a gorgeous woman — but hearing it from your lips is still a surprise. sure, she gets compliments on the daily, especially by sanji, but... yours felt much more intimate. she's not blushing because she's flustered or anything, it's just because she loves you. and that comforting warmth in her chest propagated to her neck and face.
it's small moments such as this that remind her of saul's words. each day on the sunny is a reminder, but the little things reinforce those feelings. it was such a wonderful sentiment.
you had no idea what she was thinking about, but the way the corners of her lips eased, your heart jumped too.
she really did look cute while smiling.
"you look pretty, too. smile more often, dear."
she's so lucky to have you. and you're so lucky to have her.
𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐅𝐀𝐋𝐆𝐀𝐑 𝐃. 𝐖𝐀𝐓𝐄𝐑 𝐋𝐀𝐖
dies
you think he looks... cute?
his eyes widen and he just. stops functioning for a moment. his heart feels lighter and funnier than normal, and his smile returns, a bit more timid than before.
"... really?"
"of course!"
he doesn't even believe it— he did notice from time to time how you suddenly just,, softened when he did it but he didn't think you'd like it that much. he doesn't smile a lot, sure there are definitely various moments where he feels at peace with the crew, but they come easier with you
when he showed you his coin collection, when you both took a stroll or when you simply cuddled. law might look scary to those outside — but inside, he is still the small boy whose curiosity shined above all. he is very fond of those he cares about, even if he has trouble expressing his emotions and thoughts to others. the confidence he wore doubled for you and his loyal crewmates, but he deserved rest every once in a while. years of trauma dulled him, however, when he felt something, it was strong; almost as if breaking out of a cage. he kept them deep inside, only to burst and even tremble when he was pampered. he didn't know how to react, and only with time would he grow used to it.
so,, please be patient and take care of him,, he looks after himself with everything else, but he's a lost puppy with love and physical affection. if it doesn't show on his face, his heart definitely speeds up at every small thing you tell him, casual or not.
"thank you."
you see him smile a bit more now. give him any type of compliment, affection, or anything,, and the "cold" surgeon of death will be nothing but putty in your hands.
"and... you too."
he really does love you.
𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐒𝐌𝐎𝐊𝐄 𝐒𝐀𝐍𝐉𝐈
dies 2.0
"o- oh... my love! you look adorable smiling, too!"
never-ending swarm of compliments. oh and he's hugging you as if his life depends on it.
he's not really used to the sweet words and might think he's undeserving of them. sure, it's a simple smile... but that's exactly why it gets him so much. something so mundane and common yet you see a unique beauty in his and his alone. others can warm your heart too, but he does it in a different way — in a special way.
if you tell him this in the middle of the night and you're both having a calm and peaceful moment he might cry. (if it's daytime and he's feeling a lil sensitive it's tears of joy mixed with laughter,, please hold him)
he's so happy. he'll smile as much as you want him too. if that gets you to do so too, it's a win-win for everyone!
it's usually clear when he feels affectionate,, he is most of the time. but now it DOUBLES. that comment made his day.
he's so giddy and adorable.
"you light my world up, mon rayon de soleil. if i can do so too with a simple smile... then i shall every day."
𝐄𝐔𝐒𝐓𝐀𝐒𝐒 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐃
mf's smile never dropped so fast.
"the fuck do you mean CUTE??"
was about to throw a fit but then he just. stares at you. so genuine...
"why you lookin' at me like that?? stop. 'm not fuckin' cute."
staaaare...
"... zero point one percent cute. happy? now stop looking like a goddamn puppy."
but you end up smiling even more. and no matter what he thought, his heart still beat a little faster. you looked pretty cute, too.
yes. he's a bit mean sometimes but you know he means well. he's your little man. like, he made you a tiny metal butterfly once so that even if he was busy with designing and crafting you had something to remind you of him. (he sputtered profanities and became as red as his hair before storming off walking in a wall but he still peeked from a corner to see if you liked it. when he saw your pleased expression, he smirked like the lil shit he is.)
plus... deep inside, he appreciated it. you and killer always managed to calm him down.
he truly is grateful.
"urgh. c'mere. let's go get killer 'n the others to raid a store."
...
bonus after the raid: he does your makeup and uses a great lipstick he stole found to really make you pop with the looted new clothes he got for you. hyped you up and grinned like an idiot. he's doing your nails next. killer gave you a thumbs up before finding more products himself,, raiding stores sure is fun!
#one piece x reader#one piece x you#one piece imagine#one piece scenario#monkey d luffy x reader#luffy x reader#luffy x you#luffy x y/n#nico robin x reader#nico robin x you#nico robin x y/n#trafalgar law x y/n#trafalgar d law x reader#trafalgar law x reader#law x reader#vinsmoke sanji x reader#sanji x reader#eustass kid x reader#kid x reader#eustass x reader
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Halsin's solomanced epilogue devastates me without fail EVERY TIME.
He thought it would be a mistake to go. He was certain that you, connecting with your old friends, would realize you were absolutely miserable with him at the commune, and you would leave. For the first time in his life, Halsin didn't want to roam anymore- he wanted to stay somewhere safe and comforting, and that included you. But he was sure coming was going to change all of that and make you leave him.
But he still went, partly because he missed your friends so much, and partly because he knew, if that was the case, he still needed to let you discover that. That once again, he couldn't "hoard you to himself" and be selfish. So he went, certain that any moment, you'd return to him and say it was over, and you'd found a new adventure to start without him.
It kills me that he doesn't even try to stop you! He lays out his concerns, so vulnerable but so matter-of-fact. Knowing it isn't his place to change your mind.
"You could have done anything. Gone with anyone. Yet you chose me." There's just so much... unspoken pain and confusion in that statement. He doesn't understand how or why you could have chosen him above anyone else. And for that reason alone, his own inability to see how special he is (ironic coming from the one who tells YOU back in your romance scene together that you are too modest, not realizing how special YOU are) he is certain you're about to leave him, but unlike in the act 3 romance scene where he's sure you're about to leave him for accidentally wildshaping, there's no frantically-stammered excuses. Just heartbroken acceptance.
And then, when you reassure him that of course you're staying, of course you're happy with him?
"I am still expecting to... stir from the dream."
"Forgive me. This past while has been so idyllic that I almost fear something must go wrong."
Which is a sign that on top of his insecurities and abandonment issues, this man very much does have trauma/PTSD. Because people with trauma? They're really good at living through a crisis, and really bad at NOT being in one. How do you function when there's nothing to fix? Nothing going wrong? No fires to put out? Too much quiet makes the noise inside of you louder, and that's harder to ignore than external noise. So when that happens, you start worrying about what must be about to go wrong- and for Halsin, that was losing you. He was so sure that his happiness was going to be fleeting at best that he convinced himself that you were only going to be a part of it so long as you weren't reminded of how much you loved adventuring with your friends, that the instant you remembered what the alternatives to him were, you'd take them.
It breaks my damn heart, and it makes me so happy you get to promise him that he is exactly what you want, no more and no less.
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Do you ever get the almost-writers-block feeling where your brain gives you an idea but then completely deserts you when it comes to actually fleshing it out or writing a story with it?
Mine came up with "a future where people subscribe to patreons for body models, which they then can wear"
So like you would pay 5$ a month and now you have the body of the person you subscribed to.
And all I can think of is some complications:
* if you stop subscribing or they end their patreon, you're out a body. You gotta find another one, fast. Your clothes might not fit anymore! You bought them for that body!
* the person who actually owns the body has to maintain it, as any changes will be reflected on all their patrons. Get a tattoo? Now hundreds or thousands of people have the same one. Dye your hair? I hope everyone likes being blonde! You'd probably have, like, polls for this sort of thing. Monetized Democratic body choices.
* what if they get hit by a car? A thousand people suddenly break their legs at once?
* licensing differences for bodies. Like, plenty of body patreons to have a "no doing porn" clause (because it'd be visually identical to the owner doing it), but some restrictive ones have "no having sex" (or "no having straight sex", in one notible example)
* you can subscribe to multiple body patreons and swap between which one you use on a daily basis
* pirated bodies on the darkweb
* police trying to solve crimes when the face that shows up on the cameras isn't the perp, it's some instagram model from Atlanta.
* society gets even weirder about fat shaming because anyone can wear the body of a person who weighs less than a sack of flour. Men on social media saying you gotta get her to show you childhood pictures so you can figure out if she's "really" fat.
* "we'd talked a lot online and she seemed really nice and we had great chemistry but when we finally met up, it turns out she always wears the Caitlin body!" "oh no, isn't that what your ex wore?" "exactly! And you know I've still got trauma from everything she put me through..."
* lotta young trans people figure some things out really quick. Forget "trying out crossdressing in secret" or "asking if people can use different pronouns on discord", how about trying having a different gender's body for a day?
* weird hackers trying to figure out how to modify the body-rental system so they can be dragons or elves. Speaking of which,
* people with body modifications to make themselves look less human being very popular. You can be an elf, thanks to that guy in Bowling Green, Florida who got the surgery to make his ears pointy. Apparently it paid for itself within 6 months.
* body reviews. People try out bodies and review how they are in looks and flexibility and stamina and any random aches and pains they might have.
* imagine reading one for your body. Someone walked a mile in your feet and gave a review of how your body looks and feels.
* weird couples who both wear the same body. Worse, polycules. They get together for a big cuddlepile and it's just 7 of the same body, and it gets difficult to tell where one begins and another ends.
* getting a bunch of information when you rent a new body, so you can know how it works and any odd things you gotta watch out for. Plus makeup tutorials and such, to know how to look exactly like how that body looked in certain photos
* everyone goes back to passwords on their phone. Fingerprints and facial recognition are no good, since someone could just rent the same body and now they have the same fingerprints and face.
* a subculture of disabled people who rent specific bodies not for their looks so much as their painless functionality. One of the most rented bodies amongst them is a woman from Minnesota who is definitely no model, but she's a 26 year old with no aches and pains and body that has plenty of energy and flexibility.
* oh so much drama about if it's ethical to rent bodies from other races. Predictable scandals where it turns out some musician or TikTok star is a white guy, despite their appearance as someone non-white. People get a lot madder at the white people wearing blackbody than the ones wearing asianbody, for reasons.
* a little post-it note inside a Starbucks where the customers can't see it, counting how many of a given body they've had in that morning. Someone named Stephan had 12 tally marks, and Lauren has 8. It's only 9:32 am.
Anyway yeah I have writer's block and can't do anything with this concept. Clearly.
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Having spent pretty much the entire year immersed in studying Nazi Germany, the Holocaust, and genocide more broadly, my heart is bursting with the need to stress how much you should take Project 2025 seriously. This is a long post but please stick with me.
Don't take this post as an attempt to concretely predict anything. We can't ever fully know the future and I think it's silly to say with total certainty “if Trump wins then America will become just like Nazi Germany” - not only because the future isn't written yet, but also because Germany under the Nazis was a very specific regime with its own quirks and peculiarities and I don't think that even a worst-case-scenario Trump regime would look exactly like Hitler's Germany. No two regimes ever look exactly alike: it would use the same colour palette as all far-right dictatorships but be constructed from a different medium, like what a watercolour is to an oil painting.
But just because Trump is a very different person from Hitler, and a worst-case-scenario Trump dictatorship would not literally be “Nazi Germany all over again”, that doesn't mean that what happened in Germany isn't instructive here. Forget the specifics of whether or not Trump as a dictator would organise a state identically to how the Nazis organised Germany or whatever; on a far broader and more relevant level, there is a distressing number of similarities. And too many people are falling into the same thought traps as they did then.
Please don't assume that Trump is “way too incompetent” to achieve what's in Project 2025 or Agenda 47. They said the same thing about Hitler. They said that there was no way this showman could govern effectively - holding big rallies and making speeches that get people riled up isn't the same as being good at running a functioning state and achieving what you want. The New York Times even wrote after he became Chancellor of Germany that this would only “let him expose to the German public his own futility”. And in many ways Hitler was pretty incompetent. But that didn't end up mattering. The greatest crime of the Nazi regime, the Holocaust, was masterminded mostly by a whole load of people besides Hitler, who were delegated the nitty-gritty task of actually orchestrating it. Hitler's personal incompetence didn't prevent war or genocide.
Please don't assume that Trump is “just a wacky nutcase” who “can't possibly be a real risk”. They said the same thing about Hitler. The mainstream media gave constant coverage to all the crazy extreme things Hitler said as if he was merely a bit of a joke and not a massive threat. The Nazis were quite happy with this. To quote Goebbels repeatedly in his diary, “The main thing is they're talking about us.”
Please don't assume that being in power will “moderate” Trump and that “of course he won't be able to do all the crazy stuff once he actually has to govern”. They said the same thing about Hitler. It was a common sentiment in the early 1930s that all the sensible politicians around him would force him to moderate his stances. Fritz von Papen, the last Chancellor of Weimar Germany, persuaded President Hindenburg to make Hitler the Chancellor by assuring him, “In a few months, we will have pushed [Hitler] so far into the corner that he will squeak.” It turns out that power doesn't “moderate” people who are openly talking about a dictatorship.
Please don't assume that there's any truth to the whole “Trump has nothing to do with Project 2025 and trying to link it to him is just liberal hysteria” line. They said the same thing about Hitler. People repeatedly asserted that Nazi street violence wasn't really representative of the party leadership; it wasn't representative of Hitler. He was even subpoenaed by a very brave lawyer in 1931 in a bid to prove that recent violence by Nazi stormtroopers was committed with the knowledge and encouragement of the party leadership, with part of the prosecution's argument hanging on a pamphlet by Goebbels that promised a violent overthrow of the state if the Nazis couldn't come to power legitimately. Surely no legal political party could be publishing that. In a successful attempt to escape criminal charges, Hitler repeatedly lied that the pamphlet was not official Nazi Party material and that he didn't know anything about it. No Trump didn't write it, no it isn't an official GOP manifesto, but the links between Project 2025 and Trump, the previous Trump administration, and Trump allies are extremely well documented. Just the other day, Project 2025 co-author Russell Vought was caught calling Trump's disavowals of the document “graduate-level politics” and saying, “what he's doing is just very, very conscious distancing himself from a brand ... he's in fact not even opposing himself to a particular policy.”
Please don't assume that “there's no way something like that could happen here; we're way too educated and advanced”. They said the same thing about Hitler. The Germany of the 1920s and 1930s was one of the most educated and most scientifically and industrially advanced nations in the world, and its cities were some of the most progressive in the world. People were stunned and horrified that it was in Germany of all places - Germany, land of music and art and science and literature! - that fascism took root. Germany's economic and social advancement didn't stop about 40% of its voters choosing the Nazis. It didn't stop them taking power.
Please don't assume that Project 2025 is “just a wishlist” and “not actually a serious plan”. They said the same thing about Hitler. As is hopefully very clear by now, plenty of people did not think that the Nazis were capable of, or would dare to try, putting into actual practice the horrific ideas about race that undergirded so much of their ideology. “I like Hitler; he talks sense economically and I think all this stuff about Jews is just bluff and bluster.” “Every party has a loony wing, right? You have to understand they're not serious when they talk about this stuff; they're just telling their base what they want to hear.” “God have you heard this crazy race science shit about head shapes and stuff? It's hilarious! I'm sure none of them at the top really believe that; there's no way they'd be that nuts.” When a group of people like this tells you what they believe and tells you what they want to do with power, believe them. No matter how ridiculous they seem, they're not joking.
In the words of Hans Litten, the lawyer who subpoenaed and cross-examined Hitler in that court case in 1931, “Don't listen to him; he's telling the truth.” Litten was arrested on the night of the Reichstag fire in 1933 and spent the rest of his life being tortured in concentration camps before dying in Dachau in 1938 at the age of 34.
A tyrannical dictatorship can often be seen coming a mile away. I don't want to imply for a second that what the Nazis did came as a surprise to everyone and couldn't possibly have been predicted. There were people who saw this coming in the 1920s and 1930s and tried to sound the alarm while they still had a chance. But they were too often in the minority, taking the threat seriously while others had convinced themselves that there was no need for concern because the Nazis wouldn't really do all the things they repeatedly talked about wanting to do. Everyone should have seen this coming, but too many people wanted to believe it couldn't be true.
Don't let this scare you. Let it energise you. Talk to the people in your life about Project 2025 and Agenda 47. Push back against people who assert that “they'd never actually do all that stuff” or “Trump didn't even write Project 2025” or “it's not a real plan, just a list of crazy shit to get the base riled up”. Have conversations with folks you know who are on the fence about voting or about who to vote for and who seem persuadable. Make sure you're registered to vote, and keep making sure, especially if you live in a red state where people keep mysteriously dropping off voter rolls.
Now, again, please don't read this as some confident prediction that Trump will be a Hitler figure. I want to stress that is a worst-case scenario. If a Trump presidency is what happens, I would much prefer the best-case scenario: that he spends four years fumbling around and not really accomplishing anything and then gives up power at the end without much of a fight. But it would also be a folly to be smugly overconfident that the worst-case scenario “won't” or “can't” happen. It could. It has happened before. There is no reason it couldn't happen again.
#politics#us politics#american politics#us election#election 2024#2024 election#2024 elections#us elections#2024 presidential election#antifascism#political history#ww2 history#ww2#nazi germany#please vote#your vote matters#voting matters#project 2025#agenda 47#harris#kamala harris#my posts
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Hi! I can't get Aegon out of my head and I was thinking:
He has a hard week ahead, full of meetings, important nobles arriving at king's landing, public appearances and even a ball maybe. Wife knows he's insecure and she promises him he'll be rewarded if he behaves and keep up all the rules.
And he is outstanding. He does everything and more. People even comment about it between themselves, surprised at him. Of course he's looking forward the reward, but mainly he wants wife to be proud of him, and it's so lovely to see him do his best to do everything right.
I can only think about the smile making his face glow when wife says she's so proud of him and grant him his reward.
I love this anon!! Everyone else look!! Take notes!! We can have happy Aegon on occasion!!! Also I am sorry in advance I went WAY off topic at the start but I promise this concept is actually there!! I just couldnt stop writing the background stuff because himbo sub!aegon is one of my favourite things we talk about.
This isn’t too explicit but there’s definitely some NSFW vibes and also very clearly sub!Aegon so I’ll put a cut in just to be safe :))
So firstly, I think this works better if you only married him after he became king? Maybe he was always supposed to marry Helena but then once he rules for a few weeks his mother realises she needs to find him a wife that will take control and guide him.
So needless to say when he first marries you he’s not exactly excited because his mother has all but spelled out to him that he’s marrying someone to control him.
But then he gets to know you and he’s so shocked by how you seem to really like him and you’re kind and you listen to him and most importantly you never ever make him feel stupid. The first time you praise him he literally bursts into tears because it just means so much to him.
For the first few weeks of marriage you actually just try to form a friendship with him. You want him to know you care, and you want to actually form a partnership with him and not just blindly do whatever his mother asks of you. I think the most important thing is actually just speaking as bluntly as you can? Aegon can't stand how everyone seems to be dancing around him with how they speak.
About three weeks after your marriage you walk into your shared quarters (that neither of you actually sleep in yet) and find aegon on the bed, waiting for you. You're supposed to try for an heir again, as is required but you're tired and he always looks so emotionless so instead you simply walk in, pour a glass of wine and say, "Your mother would like us to give her an heir tonight, but she's a cunt so I can't really be arsed to make her pleased with me."
He bursts out laughing when he hears this and asks for a glass of wine. You end up just sitting together and chatting and Aegon truly cant believe he's had someone who could have been his closest friend and confidant for weeks and he didnt even notice. Aegon has never had a friend before, ever. Almost instantly he's in your shared quarters every night and requesting your present not to warm his bed but just to chat.
That's when you realise how well Aegon functions when he's being guided? When you ask him to do things and he does and then you praise him he's in a good mood the entire evening. You start looking for excuses to find things for him to do. You start to ask him for specific wines or treats for the following evening just because you know he'll get it and when you thank him he will smile so wide it's adorable.
Very quickly you fall into a dynamic when you're very clearly in charge and Aegon loves it. He starts to ask you for advice or how things work and every single time he's shocked when you don't belittle him.
When things do get sexual again, he's the submissive and he truly loves it so so so much. Gone are the days of going to brothels. He doesn't even think about it anymore. How could he? He has the most lovely wife.
(Sidenote: I think aegon LOVES to call you wife? Not in a mean way but because he just loves that you're his wife and he wants to say it over and over. He'll greet you with 'good morning wife' or 'morning my lovely wife' and so on, he just loves it. Occasionally you'll respond with 'yes husband' and he always just BEAMS at you when he hears it).
So anyway this is my very very very long winded way of saying that he's loves having a partnership with you and being married to you and he always wants to help you and please you.
You start to ask some members of the small council about upcoming events and plans so that you know what to expect and how to help them with Aegon. At first they're confused, but very quickly they realise that Aegon will do all of his duties to perfection if they tell you about it beforehand (eventually you just get added to small the council but not immediately because Allicent fights against that tooth and nail).
So when you hear about all the upcoming events and appearances for this week, you know you're going to need to have some chats with Aegon about it because he hates this sort of thing. The little shit actually pouts when you tell about an upcoming ball. You have to grab him by his hair and make him kneel before he finally relents and promises to actually show up for the ball and not just spend the night at an inn.
You know all his reluctance stems mainly from insecurity, so you're gentle with him when you tell him about all the events. Maybe this is the first chunk of events after you and him became close? As a result he's never actually gone through all this with you actually at his side before.
You offer to attend everything with him, not just the ball as is required. You can barely even finish the sentence before you're being tackled to the bed and thanked over and over again. Suddenly he is much much happier about all the events, cause his wife will come with! Not only that but because everything is formal he'll get to see you in pretty dresses.
Needless to say, people are very very confused during the first event because Aegon is behaving like a completely different person. Sure he still rolls his eyes on occasion and cuts people off, but as a whole he is kind and respectful and listens to people and doesn't even drink whatsoever never mind get drunk.
Every time he does something that he knows is following the rules he’ll glance back at you like he’s trying to confirm that you have indeed seen how good he’s being and of course you always respond by smiling back at him and it never fails to lift his mood.
And yeah part of it is because he wants to be rewarded and part of it is because he wants to avoid punishment but honestly mostly it’s just him wanting to feel like you’re pleased with him? Sure the rewards are great but absolutely nothing will ever come close to seeing you smile at him because he’s done well.
At the end of every day he kneels for you and tells you about what he did and all the ways he ensured to follow the rules. You know all of this already of course, because you were with him the entire day, but you always ask him to recite everything anyway because you know how happy it makes him. Once he’s finished, he crawls into bed and lays against your chest.
For his reward at the end of the week, maybe you arrange a little breakfast in your private quarters? You wake him up by gently palming him through his undergarments until he’s hard and leaking and only then does he wake. When he does wake, his only reaction is to smile and mumble something that you think was supposed to be thanks before nuzzling closer to you and opening his legs. He’s your darling, your play thing, and he’s well are of it. He doesn’t question you whatsoever, lets you do whatever you want with him.
It’s only after he’s cum that you call the servants in to bring the food. He spends the morning curled up like a very pleased cat on your lap while you hand feed him breakfast and little treats.
#sub!aegon#aegon targaryen x you#aegon targaryen smut#aegon targaryen imagine#aegon smut#aegon targaryen x reader#aegon x reader#aegon the second#king aegon#aegon ii targaryen#hotd aegon#house of the dragon#house of the dragon fanfiction#hotd#house of the dragon imagine
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𝐖𝐀𝐈𝐓 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐈𝐓 ❞ 𓄼˚ ▍ P.B.
❛ 𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆 ━━ based off this post by @iminlovewithkatemartin ! ❜
❛ 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗻𝘁 ━━ literally just sex...feeling like a whore rn, lmao. top!paige. punishment ig?? bratty reader. ❜
❛ 𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁 ━━ 1.4k! ❜
❛ 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲 ━━ prompt was TOO GOOD so hopefully i did it some soft of justice! ❜
paige was never the first to leave a party. she was often the center of attention –– a magnet that attracted the focus of all those around her. naturally, you loved that about her…her essence and simply seeing her thriving in her element. but there were times where you wanted her all to yourself. times like now, where she chatted her ass off and all you could focus on was the sound of her voice. or when 1am comes and goes and all you think about is how good she smelled as she pulls your body closer to hers. paige is an anomaly. somehow always managing to give you all her attention yet making it feel like not enough. paige made you greedy and she knew it. it’s evident in the way she rubs your thigh a little too high as she’s sitting next to you but still never looks in your direction. it was like a mutual secret, one between only you and her, she knew how badly you wanted her right now but she was gonna make you wait for it.
by 2am you’ve grown antsy, barely replying to paige when she speaks to you. she knows you’re ready to go, she knows you’re almost too horny to function. she almost feels bad at you when she sees that slight frown plastered on your lips or when she notices the way your hips shift awkwardly every once in a while.
she says something to you, a cute little smile on her lips that you honestly hate right now. you want to leave. you don’t even hear what she said, not as if you planned on responding anyways. then you roll your eyes. paige blinks a few times, a little confused.
“baby?” her voice is gentle, genuinely concerned but she’s been feeling on your thigh for over an hour and she knows how bad you want her. you understand that giving her even a slight attitude won’t work out in your favor…but you don't care. you’re upset and you want her to know it.
“what?” the sass is evident. unable to be underplayed or considered inscrutable. it takes paige aback and the few people within earshot all look at each other because they catch it too. you wanted her to know you were pissed? well, now she knows.
paige clenches her jaw, leaning in close to whisper in your ear. “is it time to go, baby?”
you shiver, the hairs on your neck staring when she lowers her voice like that. the words, if heard by an untrained ear, might be considered sweet. they could be mistaken as paige understanding you (which she does) and being sweet about it (which is most definitely not how she planned on handling you). but you knew better. you knew the words were a warning. they translate roughly to ‘you wanna fix your fucking tone before we have a probelm?’ it’s her way of giving you a second chance.
“it’s been time to go.” she extended an olive branch but you don’t take it. you’ll pay for that later.
paige simply grabs your hand and quickly says goodbye to a few people as she leads you to her car. she opens your door for you despite being annoyed with you before she shuts it and walks around the other side. you can’t take your eyes off of her as she starts the car. neither of you speak. you sealed your own fate and you know it.
the drive is tense and silent. it seems like every passing second heart beats just a little bit faster. you could only imagine the price you’d have to pay for your little stunt.
which is exactly how you ended up here, on paige’s lap as her hands roamed over your hips. “i’m sorry…” you groan but you both know you don’t mean it.
“yeah? for what?” paige hums casually. as though anything about this situation is casual. she’s shirtless and you’re naked on her lap begging for her to fuck you. the view seems familiar, she’s had you like this one way or another a million times over but she never tires of it. she wants nothing more than to lay you down and shove her face in between your thighs but she refrains. she ignores your wandering hands, ignores the whine in your voice, ignores the need in your eyes…she needs to teach you a lesson.
“i didn't even do anything!” you grumble.
“you rolled your eyes at me and gave me unnecessary attitude.” she gives you a look that says ‘be serious’. you go to respond but then you feel her thigh tense, it makes you moan which she chuckles about.
“i’m not even touching you yet…”
“shut up.” you grumble, unable to stop yourself from grinding into her clothed thigh. she can feel the warmth even through her pants as you rub against her. it takes absolutely everything in here not to say fuck teaching you a lesson to just do everything that she knew would make you moan her name. “please…i need you.”
“it’s not good enough, hm?” she mocks you. “shouldn’t have had all that fucking attitude then. next time just tell me you wanna leave.”
you desperately try and find some way to vindicate yourself but your mind is blank, you decide it’s probably best to just focus on the task at hand. you grind against her, feeling yourself get wetter the more she touches you in every place except where you need her. it feels good. the friction against your clit making you whine…it isn’t enough and she knows it. “please, baby…”
“please what?”
“please make me come…i can’t do it like this.” she adores the pout on face, it renders her unable to stop herself from locking her lips with her own.
she bites her lip, basking in the weight of it all. the weight of your body on top of hers isn't heavy, but the knowledge that she is completely in control of you is. her hands effortlessly move around your body, reminding you of just how well she knows your body –– how easily she could make you feel good. she’d spent over a year tracing every single part of your body with her hands and mouth, she’s memorized you completely. she knows exactly how to tease you.
she kisses you with everything in her, swallowing every sound you make as you grind deeper into her thigh. you can smell her shampoo and you tangle your fingers in her hair. she trails her hand down from your hip to between your legs. she feels just how sucked you are from grinding on her thigh.
she laughs in your face, pulling her lips away from yours and licking away the spit that coats her lips. “you’re so wet…” she slides a finger through your fold and back up to caress your clit. she’s mocking your need, acting as if she wasn’t just as wet as you are. she knows you want it. but she wants you to need it.
“cause you’ve been teasing me all night…” you whisper, practically panting. your hands are braced on her shoulders and lift yourself off her thigh so she can touch you easier. she pushes her long finger in and out of you so slow that it’s cruel. but you cling onto her. after all that teasing, it’s enough to have you reeling.
you shut your eyes, grinding into her hand and then she stills her fingers, making you whine again. “no, please…keep going.”
she brings her face down to such a hickey just above your collarbone, you can’t help but buck into her hand in frustration.
“keep doing that.” she mumbles into your skin, letting her teeth graze against you and nearly making you topple over.
“what?” you’re looking at her expectantly, she can look in your eyes and tell you’re waiting for her to do it for you but she’s having none of it. you’re probably making a mess of her fingers, your soaked pussy dripping at how badly you crave her. what has she done to you?
“nuh uh, you wanna come then go ahead” she laughs in your face, sitting back and politely pressing her thumb into your clit just to watch your hips jolt at the pressure. you feel your shoulders slump when she smiles up at you the way she does when she knows she has you exactly where she wants you.
you whimper again, unable to process her words properly when all you hear is she’s not gonna make you cum. “paige…” you’re so pent up you’d do pretty much anything she asked you to do right now. you can’t even speak, only focused on the next words that leave her mouth.
“…lemme see you ride that shit, baby…”
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Magical Fawcett drugs get smuggled into a bunch of cities and the entire League is LOSING THEIR MINDS trying to control the chaos. And then Cap just goes:
"Ahh, the good old days. You know, I used to be addicted to this (this referring to a drug so powerful it could shut down every bodily function instantly for like a solid 2 days and magically make you well again) when I was a kid! Helped me get through the war."
Flash: “Whaaaaaaaaat…? Dude that literally killed a man. How did you survive taking that multiple times as a child?”
Marvel: “It literally killed a man because nowadays people are weaklings. (Fawcitizens are built different. Literally) Back in my day, 62-year-olds to 22-year-olds to 12-year-olds would take this thing and then feel fine.”
Flash: “You sure?” *sounds skeptical*
Marvel: “Of course I’m sure! Granted, it would shut down your body for like two days, but then you’d feel perfect.”
Supes: “Shutting down your body for two days, doesn’t exactly sound healthy, Cap.” *sounds concerned*
Marvel: “Well, it like flushes out the toxins, right? Like after you’ve cleaned up all the piss that you soiled yourself with and ate a nice little meal you’d feel great!”
Supes: “I don’t like how you talk like this is nothing.”
Flash: “Well, he did say he was addicted… it’s was probably normal for him- Also, wait, you don’t know if it flushes out the toxins or not??”
Marvel: “Well, that’s what my doctor told me. It’s been a while since I’ve been to one.” *shrugs*
Supes: “Your doctor used to prescribe this?” *sounds slightly horrified*
Marvel: “Yeah?”
Flash: “To children?”
Marvel: “Yeah?”
Supes: “And elderly?”
Marvel: “Yeah?”
Supes: *trying to find words* “Okay.”
Later…
Marvel: “Come on try some.” *holds up a bit of the drug*
Flash: “Dude, I’m not trying that.”
Marvel: “Why? Trust me. You’ll feel better than ever once those two days are up.”
Flash: “Still no. Also why are you peer pressuring me?”
Marvel: “I’m not peer pressuring you.”
Batman: “Yes, you are.”
Flash: “Yeah, dude, you are. If Spooky says it, that means it’s true.”
Marvel: “Okay, okay, fine. I’ll stop telling you to try it.” *puts the drug down*
Even more later at the Watchtower…
GL, Flash, and Marvel: *all in the cafeteria, eating cereal, each wearing one of these things (you pick who’s wearing what)*
Flash: *pauses eating his apple jacks* “Dude, earlier, did you say that the drugs helped you through war?”
GL: *nearly chokes on his honey nut cheerios* “What?” *wasn’t there for the entire fiasco of having to confiscate the drugs*
Marvel: “Hmm? Oh, yeah.” *eats his captain crunch* Flash: “Is that you admitting you went to war?”
Marvel: “No, I didn’t. But everyone was kinda depressed back then so the drugs helped. I also worked in ammunition factories so I’ve seen a couple people get parts chopped off.”
GL: “Oh my God, I’m so sorry.” *sounds concerned*
Marvel: “Eh it’s fine. That’s what the drugs were for. That and all the diseases and problems you could get from inhaling the wrong things or standing too close to a machine.”
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how exactly is John lying (/about what) and is that the worst part of him and how explicit is it in the books? i often dont understand general/fandom characterizations of fictional characters and HtN is definitely not the book I paid the most attention in, so I just wanna see if I missed something wholly obvious
So John is a Lying Liar Who Lies, and I think the most damming evidence for the sheer enormity of it all is this bit in HtN, page 482:
Many of the things John says are like, him reflecting or discussing things only he has memory of, with no one left to dispute his version of events, and it's clear that he has long ago lost the "objective truth" of his own history--some of this is likely the side effect of being alive for ten thousand years, but a lot of it is probably due to the fact that he doesn't want anyone to know what actually happened. HtN p. 158:
John is talking to Harrow here, but to Me, he is also reassuring himself. He KNOWS that people would judge him for his actions, and alters the stories he tells accordingly. Nobody has to know. It happened, and he can't undo it, and they wouldn't understand. He's motivated to lie, he's capable of lying, and he himself has stated that he believes that there is no difference between the truth, and the truth he tells himself. Because he's God.
Anyway. re: "how explicit is it", a lot of the times where we know for sure John is telling an untruth, he isn't directly lying per say, but rather misrepresenting events to such an insidious extent that it is functionally the same as lying. Here is a short and incomplete list:
All the times Harrow begged him to protect her from G1deon the First, and John was like sorry I can't do that, when in fact JOHN was the one who ordered G1deon to attack Harrow
Changing the names of all his friends and not telling them what their previous names or personalities were (and if he didn't tell them that, it's very reasonable he may have kept other things from them as well)
Saying that the House of the First was killed by "rising sea levels" and a "massive nuclear fission chain reaction" when the Earth actually died because John initiated a nuclear standoff, and then set off a nuke. like yeah what he said was technically the truth, but it also served to paint an extremely different picture when compared to what we learn in NtN
In NtN, in the dream, John tells Harrow about the time he killed all those cops, and he mentions that when it happened he was like "I swear to God, I didn't know what I was doing" "I freaked out, it was an accident", "I made a mistake". and then like half a page later he tells Harrow "Come on love. Guys like me don't have accidents"
Saying he ate peanuts "discreetly", and "the once"
"is this the worst part of him" I think that is up to you, I really like the layers this adds to the story. So much of NtN is literally just John telling Harrow/the reader a story, and we know he misrepresents events and tells untruths and is motivated to protect his own image and no longer sees a difference between the truth and the truth he tells himself. So it's like... we are getting all this info about what happened pre-appocalypse/resurrection, but how much of it is REAL? How much of it is reliable? How much of it would match the story if anyone else was alive to tell their side? It is so interesting to me. It's like a hefty peanut butter filled kong, to me.
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"I once had a very stupid fight with my wife." Will says as he watches Hannibal pouring the Sauvignon blanc in their glasses.
"Not that stupid if you felt the need to bring it up now." Hannibal said as he lifted his gaze from his glass to Will. Even though they've been together for a few months now, he still felt something inside himself getting triggered every time he would bring her up.
As if she would materialize in front of them and take Will away from him. Again. He was not sure if he preferred it when Will called her "Molly" instead of "my wife". Both felt like the screech of chalk on a blackboard.
The term "wife" however, made it feel less personal since it only highlighted a title given by a piece of paper. Mundane. Profane. The piece of paper was not enough for Will to stay with her. The problem with that construction was therefore not "wife", it was the possessive pronoun "my".
Well, technically she was Will's wife until their marriage would get terminated. But Hannibal didn't want Will to use "my" for anyone. And this has been something which has started from before going to prison and before fleeing to Florence.
Quite territorial of him to gain his man back and still act that way even when they had literally jumped off a cliff together. No piece of paper could beat that.
"It's the wine that reminded me." Will explained.
Hannibal arched an eyebrow. What did Will mean by that? He hadn't even had a chance to drink yet, how could the wine bring back such memories already?
"You know, me and Molly hardly ever fought."
Hannibal blinked a few times and tried to keep a neutral expression on his face. There it was, the name as well.
"I don't think, in fact, that this was a fight either. Now that I think about it, my confrontational style is not what a wife is looking for."
Hannibal looked at him with interest, not missing the way he said "a wife". So general. So unimportant. A wife like any other wife, nothing unique.
"Your confrontational style is indeed too passive for a wife." He agreed. "Passive and acidic."
From threatening him with a gun, to almost stabbing him, to starting his therapy again, to "dropping the mic", Hannibal was sure that Molly hasn't even experienced a small percentage of what Will could be capable of.
Will hummed as he picked up his glass and stared at his reflection in the clear white wine.
"So what happened?" Hannibal asked, now interested.
"She paired the fish I caught that day with the wrong wine."
Hannibal parted his lips slightly and didn't take his gaze away from Will, searching him from head to toes. "Was that a problem? To you?"
"No, but it would have been a real problem to you."
Hannibal felt the need to bring his own glass to his lips.
"You wouldn't have made such a mistake. And you wouldn't have brushed it off. You know, Molly - she's a g&t type of person. So it wasn't that big of a deal to her. And I laughed it off."
"But it wasn't that easy."
"It wasn't that easy and she noticed that it was deeper than that. It was not that I was trying to play the alpha male, trying to teach her how to drink wine. She was smart, she knew that was not my intention." Will said.
"So what followed?"
"The reason why we functioned for those few years was exactly because she knew not to get too close. We were both aware she wouldn't like it if she did. Which kind of sounds pathetic since marriage involves all that "for better and worse" thing."
"An overused statement which people are nowadays taking for granted." Hannibal added. "Your marriage did not entail the "for worse" part, did it?"
"Out of mutual convenience. Since "my worst" was something both of us wanted to stay away from. We had all the good parts. So instead of trying to figure out why I was so bothered by her poor choice of wine, she told me to go buy the right type of wine if I disagree with the rosé. And we both laughed."
"And did you?" Hannibal asked, a bit amused, a bit bitter.
Will looked around the room and then looked at him only. "Here I am, I did exactly what she said. Went for the wine that could be properly paired with myself."
Hannibal knew that at that point every effort to keep a neutral face would be futile. He was beaming right there, under Will's gaze.
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so around the start of the summer I ate literally as much as my body could possibly handle every day, every meal. I got in the habit of gorging myself until I could hardly breathe, could not stand or sit or even lay down comfortably, and my belly was aching. I couldn’t even sleep, nor could I really do much of anything but sit there helplessly and gasp or groan at how big I’d gotten, and how full I’d become. This was exactly what I wanted.
I was consuming between 7000-12000 calories a day during this time. This lasted about 2 months or so, maybe 10 weeks. I rarely took a break, and this had…intense consequences on my capacity. I routinely ate things like: entire family sized dinner portions for each component(vegetables, starches, meats). Family sized fast food meal deals(usually about 5 combos worth). 7-8 combos from various fast food places(usually their entire menu). Party sized or tailgater tray offerings from restaurants(usually enough for 10-15 people).
I cannot become full now. No matter what I do, if I’m not eating literally family sized portions, I’m not filled. I can become comfortably satiated after 3-4 meals at once, but my belly constantly yearns for more.
I finally have started experiencing some of the crazy ‘feedism fantasy’ tropes I thought weren’t real (or at least greatly exaggerated due to ya know…writing lol). Things like
I literally can get hunger pangs WHILE MY STOMACH HAS A REASONABLE AMOUNT OF FOOD INSIDE. I’m talking I’ve already eaten a heavy plate that is literally 3-4lbs of food. Gone. Inside me. But my belly has the NERVE to growl around it and demand more food.
Sometimes I become anxious when the only amount of food available to me is a normal serving size (this is honestly the hottest. I’m talking whiny, worried, needy feelings because I only got enough food for 1 person.)
i crave eating 24/7, or for long periods. I catch myself daydreaming about sitting down with enough food for a large gathering, and stuffing it all inside myself for literal hours. I’m not kidding, I want to eat for 6-8 hours straight of almost nonstop consumption. I just want to sit down, lean back with my gut supported by my lap or my couch, and stuff it so completely full. I would prefer if my primary activity for the day was eating.
hunger and arousal are now so completely linked I almost cannot experience one without the other…which means I’m hungry and horny pretty much unceasingly. Constantly my mind goes back to sex and eating. I’m literally just daydreaming in the background about when I will get to open my mouth next.
I’ve now eaten many of the feeding fantasy portions. Family meals, party trays, entire cakes, multiple entire pizzas, entire trays of baked goods, entire boxes of cakes, a box of donuts, entire pies, and generally levels of excess that I can only describe as obscene.
This has caused me to really fatten up. I gained 40 or so lbs from the end of March to the middle of July. I also happened to do this without an encouraging, physical, coercive or forceful feeder, which means if I were to have these (what I desperately crave), I imagine I would reach new capacity heights. I primarily eat for fullness. I love that food drunk fullness feeling where my entire body stops functioning properly. I love feeling like all I can literally do is let my belly do its thing and process all the food I gave it. I’m desperate for it. I constantly crave it. The weight gain is an unintentional but welcomed side effect of my incessant gorging.
I cannot wait for my next opportunity. I have so many ideas. Will I finally try 3 pizzas? Will I try to eat more foot longs than I am tall? Will I make myself an entire family banquet and then greedily try and eat it myself? I need to do it soon. I can’t keep eating enough for 6-7 people each day…I need more, and I need it all at once.
#me#pcbg essay#gaining weight on purpose#feeding kink#glorify obesity#fatty getting fatter#feedee feeder#gaining weight#extreme feederism#fattening myself#male wg#ssbhm feedee#gaining kink#gaining fat#fat pig#solid lard#stuffed full#stuffed feedee
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