#I have no face when I think of myself so
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
so i drew myself
#tw eyestrain#unreality#pink and purple#digital art#drippy stuff...#wires#heavy on the face blurring#I have no face when I think of myself so#would have drawn myself as just a Being but that's controversial
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
playing around w slightly different hair renders
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#yuuji#megumi#cries megumi fought tooth n nail..... i refused 2 flip the canvas tho >:(#i vastly prefer drawing him facing right bc fr some reason it makes his hair look better silhouette-wise#so having him face left is alr a Challenge#but also having him slightly look down (difficult angle + changes the silhouette) had me bashing my head in2 th TABLE#same thing happened earlier this month w gardening megu middle pose . i did not learn my lesson#but even worse w this one yuuji's head is blocking th main pointy part tht basically carries the entirety of the shape language#u can imagine my distress i am sure#anyway th render made me a lot happier with it thank god. colours hard carry bless <3333#i didn't plan on making it a full sheet but i needed 2 remind myself that im good at drawing megumi#so i threw in solos of each of them n tried slightly different render flavours#idk how Different all of them look visually but th process fr each ws Very different so i am satisfied#fight aside this ws useful i think! got 2 break out some Clunkier chalks n dust off a few of my smoother blended brushes#think i picked up some things i can keep also !! which ws. u kno. the Goal#tbh every time i do art studies i feel like i am kirby#one time i got called an art ditto by one of my fav artist mutuals when i did a style challenge#SUCH high praise from her it lives in my mind i take it out on days when i feel like trash#it doesnt Sound good when u say u r good at copying but real talk it is such a good skill i am very happy 2 have it in my arsenal
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
pygmalion and galatea for aroace people
you should tell your friends what I look like, riz gukgak.
#fantasy high#fantasy high sophomore year#fhsy#riz gukgak#baron from the baronies#fh class quangle#class swap babeyy! bard!riz that's whats goin on!#I really need tags for these now I think lmao#ask to tag#I feel like this should be tagged something. but I dont know what#in my brain after the initial kidnapping class swap baron's thing is every time riz keeps his story abt them up in front of his friends#they get a little bit closer. they send him pictures of where they supposedly are n stuff#theres a scene in my brain only of kristen and riz on top of the van and kristen is like everything kinda sucks rn can u tell me abt baron#cause what you guys have is so nice and beautiful. and riz almost doesn't but he ultimately can't deny kristen a little peace#lmao I feel like dipping into baron stuff with the class swap is like showing my whole ass online again I just. I'm a#horror person before all else... I cant stop myself. canon baron is Great and Cool but that is kind of the thing. for a horror thing theyre#Too Cool. I think cool is kind of the neutralizer of scary. when a monster is a certain amount of cool it overrides the scary#and now u just have a Cool Monster#its so fucked for bard!riz this year bc he doesn't have an office (he's mooching off the school wifi from the AV club room lol)#so there's no buffer between adventure and home life. so baron just shows up in the strongtower apartment lmao#sophomore year bard!riz looks like a slasher protag so I just leaned into it I guess. he gets a mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon kennedy#well. its worse actually. they can show up where he is at any moment theyve proven this. but they dont#they choose to punish him slowly as he lies to his friends instead. baron is mr. x if mr. x is made up by leon and also a bitch#I think its gonna pop up if class swap baron ever speaks in a comic I do but their voice comes from like. inside their hollow face#it sounds like it's a lot deeper in there than that skull should be#tbh what I have rn is kinda like a bag of loose pieces that Can fit together into something great but I dont have the energy to#really sit down with them yet lol. Im doing this inbetween other things#it comes or it doesn't! it's fine. funny how today's bad comic day also. I wont say this is for bad comic day bc all my comics are#flawless and beautiful and perfect and awesome and beautiful and the best#but u should. if u havent drawn a comic today or at all ever u should draw a comic
289 notes
·
View notes
Text
Send me every little selfie you take so that i can look at them whenever i miss you
#wlw#wlw mood#sapphic#sapphism#lesbian#hate how much im having a picture locket of my beloveds face coded#embarrassing tbh#like pls let me look at pictures of you when i miss you and i can’t sleep pls pls pls pls#when i dont have time to text or call you but i miss you#when i just sort of need to stare at you but we aren’t together#ughhhhh#i like pictures SO much#but also i would rather die than have a picture of myself exist i hate those things smh#few experiences as mortifying to me as having my picture taken horrible and awful#my brain is itchy just thinking about it#im gay and i like sleeping#also also i am. So tired.#i tried to grammar check all this but god i cannot focus on it lol#so apologies if there’s nonsense😅#time to SLEEP even though i have absolutely NO pictures to stare at longingly smh😒
192 notes
·
View notes
Note
cursed no tattoo machete (I'm sorry for doing this to him)
.
#!!!#I mean one person's cursed is the other one's aesthetic I think this is actually a look in itself and you can fight me on that#see this is what I mean when I say the black lids are an important part of his design#they pull a lot of weight in terms of how his face works and how clearly you can see his eyes#without them his expressions are a lot harder to read especially from a distance#he loses a lot of his sharpness#the white eyelashes though the eyelashes have me weak#over the years I've thought numerous times to myself “why don't I give him cute little blonde lashes those are pretty”#only to realize 0.5 seconds later it doesn't really work in his case#you win some you lose some#thank you! I had a good chuckle when I first saw this it was such an unexpected sight#your style is so painterly and soft looking#answered#gift art#alwaysoutofpaper#own characters#Machete#barefaced early morning Machete before the daily goth eyeliner routine
593 notes
·
View notes
Note
Have you ever read homestuck? Because i love that your art style is similar to homestuck but with danganronpa characters (idk if whatever i said has sense)
#admin post#no yeah. no. yah. yeah you nailed it#this felt like getting slapped in the face after turning a corner HDGSFDSBFSDFSD but yeah#i painted myself grey and all that#i still think abt them (the sillies)#i ran an hs blogs before this one so obv the influence stuck (lol) around#i drew so much HS over the years its impossible for it to not have influenced me a bit#anyway always fun when new people find out abt my past fandoms thru my artstyle
258 notes
·
View notes
Text
a lot of clipping to fix, but hey I got it moving at least! I'll get the Telvanni robe properly physic'd if it's the last thing I do >:0
#last i checked the vanilla hdt clothes on the nexus didn't cover solstheim content#but i wanted to finally learn to do proper hdt bones myself anyway so its fine :)#this was a nightmarish mess before i separated the black underskirt to its own group#now it swishes around nicely and collides without going through the red outer skirt#i still haven't figured out the crouching/sneaking problem where it'll sometimes phase through the thighs like they don't exist#but that seems to happen to other people's outfits too so maybe it's not just mine? idk yet lol#hmmm i think that back flap thing with the gold trim is gonna have to be separated too. it stretches out weirdly :/#also. should the scarf get to move? maybe just the dangling ends?#bc the rest can't really move since there's nothing under the scarf. it's just glued at the edges to the chest of the outfit#which is good bc it's optimized well so the game isn't rendering the neck part of the robes that you don't even see#but I'd have to create new faces on the mesh to fill in the unseen gaps like i did when splitting the skirts up#and also i'm too lazy to map that new fancy chest area and draw out the missing texture with all the telvanni swirls :'(#help me motivation gods#modding stuff#my posts#i want nelly to be able to swish around prettily like anyone else <3#guys deserve some physic'd outfit love too
89 notes
·
View notes
Text
AND I MET THE CHANGE GOD TOO. OKAY. COOL OKAY
#I WASNT EVEN MEANING TO SO I ACCIDENTALLY SKIPPED THE DIALOGUE BEFORE I KNEW WHAT WAS HAPPENING FUCK#ill go and find it later if only to give myself peace of mind. BUT WOW. WHAT THE FUCK#my original plan was to 1) work my way to the king and talk to him 2) doom myself and take everyone down with me 3) loop back to floor 3#so i can visit the observatory and scrounge for any lore. although since i got killed that run siffrin asked the king to kill him first#which was intereresting. but i decided to have all doors unlocked that time around so i can just get the starcrest and go#but for some reason it wasnt working so i went to get the keyknife since i was already there and completely forgot i already had it#from the previous loop and THATS what triggered it. IT WAS FUNNY BUT ALSO SCARY BUT ALSO I THINK I GET WHAT THEY MEAN#about siffrin going back without actually changing. going along with a script even if his feelings on things change#the same way he has his own small rituals like the carving thing and does it for constancy. reassurance or safety even#and the times when he breaks script and ends horribly like the sadness attacking thing and bonnie yelling at him cause him to loop#to avoid it. although i cant really say anything bc id probably do the same thing. maybe not for the same reasons since im cruel#and make him do the worst to see what will happen since i put curiosity over rejection sensitivity as an observer and player but well.#i feel wrongfooted bringing it up since i dont have it myself but i have to wonder if this kind of leans into ocd tendencies.. i remember#reading something about how ocd is fuelled by fear. and things like counting and rituals are kind of used to cope with that?#if anyone knows anything more or talked abt it already id be really interested in hearing it bc im almost sure im not#the first to come to this conclusion. but i simply dont know enough nor have the confidence to broach the topic rn esp with how often#misconceptions around ocd get casually passed around so its hard for me to know what is and isnt a baseless assumption#puppy plays isat#in stars and time#isat#playthru#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#isat act 3 spoilers#change god#WHAT WAS THAT WITH WEARING LOOPS FACE THOUGH WHAT THE FUCKKK
51 notes
·
View notes
Text
if anyone has seen that robofucker chaser post i've been cackling at this interaction.
drops an absolutely insane theory, presents it as fact with no evidence
"what the hell makes you think that" "I have a degree" explains nothing and leaves
#funnies#robots#LOOK IM LITERALLY THE SENTIENT ROBOT GUY#THATS LIKE ONE OF MY GIMMICKS#advanced robots is one thing but sentient robots is a whole nother can of worms#yeah i'll sure have egg on my face in 50 years when my sentient robot grandson is kicking the ball around the yard#and he looks at me with a glimmer in his robot eyes and I think back to this post#and have a chuckle to myself#“grandpa whats so funny grandpa? i'm a robot”#(he ends all his sentences that way)#“nothing kiddo just thinking about the past”#and then we laugh and my sentient robot grandson rips my arm off with his elbow joint
132 notes
·
View notes
Note
what are some of your favorite acting moments in the x files?
i may do a proper full list sometime in the future but one thing that i think about every single day of my life is mulder being scripted to cry in the beginning of memento mori and duchovny saying that a lot of actors “try to feel” but people don’t go through life trying to feel, they go through life trying not to feel. “we go through life trying not to cry.” and so he plays it as completely composed, “but struggling,” and it defines an arc.
because if scully tells mulder that she’s got incurable cancer and she is going to die and he says “i refuse to believe that” while crying, it projects to the audience that he already does. why break down over something you don’t think is going to happen? he says “i refuse to believe that” with a straight face, and eventually gets her to acquiesce and admit something that she knows isn’t true, that goes against literally everything in her as a scientist and a doctor and someone whose job is to tell him the truth, and says that maybe they’ll find a cure for her death sentence.
she meets him where he is, and they stay there, and every scene that follows that decision is so haunted by it. they don’t talk about it, they don’t accept it, she’s dying alone and he doesn’t believe.
there’s this really palpable and intense repression that i’ve written about in the past, that comes with the fact that they’re both lying. he does know what’s happening. he is completely capable of understanding. she does not think that he can save her. they both go through it alone, because of that initial refusal, and it doesn’t work if he reacts to that diagnosis with tears.
#also related but i think my favorite dd moment on txf is the look on his face in elegy#when scully’s nose starts bleeding and she hurries to the bathroom. after she’s left#and i actually can’t describe it but i have in the past called it ‘that thing he does with his face that makes me want to kill myself’#that feels most accurate to me#but it’s this small and quiet and solitary acknowledgement of what’s happening and how he feels behind closed doors#about things that they don’t talk about#and it’s always been my favorite moment and then i later found out that david hated that episode and fought the script#and changed a lot of mulder’s behavior so that it would make more sense to him#and i think those are my favorite acting moments when it comes to that character#is when that character was just so thoroughly understood#‘what is it about mulder that keeps you coming back?’ ‘he’s mine.’#asks#memento mori
75 notes
·
View notes
Text
Ash via Perola Navarro's IG Story
#yes i accidentally screamed when i clicked on this we really don't need to talk about it#5sos#5 seconds of summer#ashton irwin#ashton#instagram#other ig#kh4f post#he is just sooooooo#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh 👹👹👹👹👹🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️🤸🏻♀️😭😭😀😀🥰🤩🥲😘🤪🫠💅🏻#so that's that on that#he sure has a face#it definitely has lips#and a chin that sure has a dimple#that's the last tag actually I can't do this actually#have i mentioned yet today that i got like 2 hours of sleep last night lmao#so I'm definitely in the right place to process this#godddddddd#i think in the name of self care i need to commit myself to writing again these feelings need to go somewhere jfc 💆🏻♀️
100 notes
·
View notes
Text
just because your peers are reaching “life milestones” before you doesn’t mean you’re falling behind in life. You’re not behind in life. You’re not you’re not you’re not you’re not and maybe someday you’ll believe it
#one of those nights folks!#I know when and if a person reaches so called life milestones is arbitrary!!! But why am I so behind???#it’s just. more people I grew up with are getting married and having kids#I don’t even think I want kids!!#it’s just that it goes along with them having the relationships and stability to do so!!#and I’m envious of that!#and it’s pathetic that I still blame all the bullying I went through for my lack of relationships when I know it’s really my own fault#for not bettering myself and going out and meeting people and instead waiting for a future where I’m no longer disgusted with my body#ack sorry if you opened the tags only to be slapped in the face with vent#it be like this sometimes
226 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think what might actually help the families of trans loved ones is to actually engage with where the trans person is at - especially if the family isn't quite understanding yet. When I came out, I was completely alone in figuring out my manhood. I had peers and I had exposed myself to so many trans people who explored gender, and while it was amazing, it isn't quite the same at times. I grieve quietly, sometimes, about all the missed opportunities that might have just made it easier for my family to have seen how utterly happy I was. It took them a very long time to actually notice that I was happy, especially once I got on testosterone. I'm lucky that they saw that happiness eventually, and slowly accepted it. My manhood is completely detached from their influence, both to my relief and chagrin. It's sad to me that I learned to shave from a kind online stranger, somebody who didn't even have a father and yet, I do. I have a father. I grieve at the loss of a potential shared experience. I grieve about the pain I went through when I was in that stage of transition, especially because it was raw and vulnerable. I grieve that many trans people today are traversing the path I had to, because it's sometimes lonely (even when you do have other forms of support).
It's hard to know that I will never have gotten my sense of being from my family. In many ways, it has severed a lot of connection with them because there were so many times that I was begging them to see happiness when they were focused on the idea that I was almost in a state of purgatory - flesh which felt warm but held no familiarity to them. I don't harbor ill-will toward them, I hope I don't leave the impression that I despise them. I understand what they felt, even if I can't conceptualize it myself. However, it's a raw wound in my heart, and I don't want to leave anybody else feeling that way, either.
#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgbtq#ftm#mtf#nonbinary#ally advice#i'm thankful that my manhood is the way it is. but it was a painful journey to get here and i did it partially alone#i absolutely am grateful to have had my friends and the trans people who made themselves known though. i owe these people my life#i still think it's not unreasonable to have wished for my /family/ to have been part of that journey sooner especially when i was young#sometimes it seems like parents who believe their child has died after they express their transness make that a self-fulfilling prophecy...#...in that the parent often aloenates themself/themselves from their child in a variety of ways...#...i was alienated from my dad when he threatened my transition - it became a self-fulfilling prophecy in that i shut myself down...#...i retreated inward and in a way became a ghost - corporeal to the touch but a spirit who may not be seen...#...in many ways i felt in limbo between life and death. it was a cycle of purgatory#and that is something i think is best avoided. it's lonely and scary and it makes it hard to imagine a future#i need to emphasize that even though this was shitty i am still lucky in so many ways#i just faced a lot of undue shit even so - shit i don't think was conducive to a good environment or well-being
161 notes
·
View notes
Text
heyyyy who wants some lowish-resolution Lights Out angst scribbles before i go sleep!!!
(gonna put this under the cut bc im not sure if it can be considered spoiler-y or not? does this au even Have spoilers if there's no shared cohesive plot yet? who knows! i'm doing this impulsively i don't know what i'm doing ever! ! i like drawing characters in distress and anguish! thank you!)
#also if i dont share them now i just Know i never will#i like scribbling distress but Especially when its barnaby. he has the face for it. sad puppy <3#i mostly scribble these to help myself Think and Visualize#who knows! in a week some or all of them could be rendered non-au-canon by Evolving Ideas#scribble salad#wh lights out au#the last wally one is probably my favorite of the bunch#i like making myself sad by playing the Scene its from in my head <3#wail in anguish puppet boy... wail and sob....#going back to my roots with these babeyyyyyy#kind of. mildly.#its been too fluffy on this blog#i need to remember where im from... what im about... Who I Am....#also 'why is wally so small' bc all of the puppets are there physical sizes#also im Terrible at scribbling consistent size differences <3#i will Always overcompensate <3#anyway this au is called lights out aka I Torment Barnaby On An Intensely Emotional Level#what can i say? i have cuteness aggression <3
256 notes
·
View notes
Note
Circling back to this official art by Satoru. I was thinking about how Kiryu tries to snap selfies with him and he’s always struggling away and never looking towards the camera, even at social gatherings he’s the one that’s blurry or out of focus because it’s so clear he does not want his photo taken.
Until you ask him so sweetly to take a selfie with you at a social gathering one weekend and he literally can’t bring himself to tell you no, because he wants to take a selfie with you too. So he’s bending down to get into frame and you’re shuffling closer to him until his head is pressed against yours as he’s fighting the blush that crosses his cheeks as he tries to remember to breathe. Softening his face as he stares into the camera and you take the photo.
Kiryu is in the background complaining that Sugishita never takes selfies with him *pout pout pout*
And when you ask him if he’d like you to send a copy to him he surprises you by agreeing (and if anyone could ever get a glimpse of his phone screen that photo is now his wallpaper)
But also the idea that he will use the picture of you and him as his wallpaper makes me SO emotional and soft 😭 PLS he’s almost like a changed man around you! Just a lot more mellow and actually engaged in what’s going on. Also Ume catches him one day staring at his wallpaper and he can’t resist asking ‘you really like her, don’t you?’ & sugishita doesn’t even contemplate his answer, eyes still focused on your pretty features, and he just gives a firm nod confirming his feelings for you 🥺
#NO PLEASE I AM SOSOSOSOOSOSOOSSO SOFT#I read this earlier today but i literally haven’t had a moment to myself all day since 10am#& I have been thinking about this for hours!!!!!#and I still can’t get over the image of him pressing his face to yours 🥺#he is so shy yet also so bold?!?!#his heart is racing when you ask him & he is so close to telling you no but he genuinely would hate himself if he did#would never let this moment pass by 🥺#letters to nana 💌#bakugous-forehead.ask#sugishitaaa <3#nana’s one piece saga 🌪️
44 notes
·
View notes
Text
huge props to marinette for spinning up that lie so fast and on the spot, too. I thought I was good but damn. of course she must have had a general idea of what she was going to say to adrien beforehand going off of gabriel's "make me look good" and her own love telling her that the truth would hurt adrien even more, but that's just a very vague idea. she could not have possibly spun up that entire story of a lie in her head beforehand with all that was going on - dealing with all the truths coming in one after the other, the crying, the emotional trauma, getting the kwamis back -
and of course, there's adrien. he is one of the highest things on her list of priorities, his safety being the first thing she needs to take care of. the problem is, she doesn't know how. the only thing she can do in that situation is lie. a small lie. just one to make it better for now and then she can make it a long-term lie later. make sure no one else finds out.
and once she started telling the lie, once the first words were out of the mouth, it was all improvisation. her next words showed up in her head as she was going, spinning up a believable story, just good enough to be taken as the truth. she rambled - a rookie mistake for liars - but you couldn't blame her. she's a professional liar, almost, with her superhero identity, but this one is different. just one hour after learning the truth she had to cover up all this with no warning beforehand.
she couldn't tell adrien the truth. but she couldn't do much to comfort him either. ladybug couldn't tell him something only marinette knows.
she had to lie. she had to come up with something on the spot. those words would haunt her for the rest of her life - that lie was all she could think about for the next couple of months because she had to make it work. she had to keep the truth and make everything work out. it wasn't a big deal. she just had to tell adrien something, anything that would comfort him! what would comfort him about his father? what would convince him that he was a good guy this whole time? that he was a, a, a hero! yes, she would tell him that. it was a white lie! she wasn't a bad person! she just had to tell adrien that his father was a hero so that he would never have to know the truth and suffer like she did. he was a hero.
was.
once that word came out of her mouth, there was no going back.
#ok coming from someone who is VERY good at lying (and no that's not a lie) I am VERY IMPRESSED by that.#it's not even an exaggeration by the writers. in fact I think this is perfect.#ive had to lie several times before. make sure there were no plot holes in the story I was trying to spin to get out of trouble. to be safe#to save a life.#this is very realistic of her.#when she's under pressure she talks. she lies. some of her smartest moments are made up of lies. it might seem like a good idea at the time#she might not know what's coming out of her mouth as she's saying it.#but regardless she needs to deal with it later. once the adrenaline has finally died down and she faces the consequences of her actions.#once the emotion has died down. once the truth of what she's said sinks in.#I lie on the spot if I have to. my stories stay active for just long enough that eventually it becomes a fact of life and I have to remembe#each detail of the lie so that it doesn't fall apart.#it can't fall apart. the world will end if it falls apart.#(the world is a web of lies that I have spun.)#oh MAN the marinette thoughts today. should I write a fic. yea im writing a fic.#marinette dupain cheng#miraculous ladybug#ml spoilers#ml london special#wait I just realised all these paragraphs I typed up what the heck what am I doing with my time#gotta love lying to people tho.#actually no thats a lie I hate it.#ugh life is so confusing can I pls just project myself onto marinette instead of having to deal with stuff#yk out of all the characters I didn't realise SHE would be one of the ones I resonate with the most. but thats a fact and I love it.
24 notes
·
View notes