#I have no capacity
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we need to make phone charms a thing again
#in gonna try and hit max p this weekend boiz#but the major qualies are happening and i can’t duo focus#it’s a problem#but i got introduced to a new band and im obsessed#but now im just doomscrolling#I have no capacity#send help#also#im not fixing the typos ✌🏻👽#kiki
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one of the biggest things I can advocate for (in academia, but also just in life) is to build credibility with yourself. It’s easy to fall into the habit of thinking of yourself as someone who does things last minute or who struggles to start tasks. people will tell you that you just need to build different habits, but I know for me at least the idea of ‘habit’ is sort of abstract and dehumanizing. Credibility is more like ‘I’ve done this before, so I know I can do it, and more importantly I trust myself to do it’. you set an assignment goal for the day and you meet it, and then you feel stronger setting one the next day. You establish a relationship with yourself that’s built on confidence and trust. That in turn starts to erode the barrier of insecurity and perfectionism and makes it easier to start and finish tasks. reframing the narrative as a process of building credibility makes it easier to celebrate each step and recognize how strong your relationship with yourself can become
#this is my experience so I know it won’t work for everyone#like all things there is no universal formula#we all have different capacities and capabilities#but I like sharing things that work for me in case they can also help someone else#studyblr#study motivation#study tips#university#academia#uni tips
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Portraits
Retouched this set from last year, because it was haunting me laying there 80% finished
#yes stelle is also supposed to be here but i just dont have the strength to finish that mess of a sketch she was left as 😔#so not technically a finish set but I'm gonna post it anyway#honkai star rail#hsr#hsr fanart#astral express#dan heng#welt yang#march 7th#himeko#fanart#my art#i miss hsr a bit but i just don't have time and storage capacity to play it anymore
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I'm going to say something that will make sense to the Fandom Olds and will probably be slightly controversial to the younger crowds, but I'm going to say it anyways
TPTB becoming increasingly aware of fandom and fanfiction over the past two-ish decades and thus, the spawning of the expectation of your ship going canon has ruined fandom a little bit
I mean, fandom does a great job of ruining itself a lot of the time, but this idea that a ship isn't "real" or "valid" if it isn't canon
or the idea that one ship is superior to the other because one is canon and the other isn't?
it's absolutely bananas
I grew up in an era of fandom where characters didn't even have to be from the same media source to ship them. I mean, do you know how many BtVS/HP crossover fics I read back in the early 2000s???
That shit was never gonna be canon, but we had fun with it, anyways
Like. Yeah, a lot of fanon speculation is bullshit, but it always has been and always will be. You have hundreds and/or thousands of people riffing off each other, the observations and the meta will always be deeper than what TPTB intended, and that's okay! That's what makes it fun!
I just think more people would be a lot happier in their fandom experiences if they realized that fandom is supposed to be an escape instead of a crusade
#fandom#shipping#I should be sleeping but I couldn't stop thinking about this#so here I am past my bedtime trying to articulate something that I'm not sure I have the mental capacity to articulate#idk man spread love not hate
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insane to me that because of how my parents acted towards me as a child my brain was irrevocably changed and now i just have to suffer the rest of my life because of it
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the thing about "callout/cancel culture" that convinced me it's rotten to the core is the dehumanisation you face once you become the subject of a campaign like that. a lot of criticisms of callout/cancellation attempts appeal to the humanity of the subject, pointing out that it's unfair and unproductive to treat a person, a fellow human being, regardless of how much harm they've caused and how genuinely unlikable they are, like that. but unfortunately the reality of being the target of a mob mentality often means facing the very isolating and traumatising experience of realising that you've ceased to exist as a person in their eyes. you're a representation of your transgressions, an embodiment of harm that needs to be erased like a blemish, a spectacle for entertainment, a means of earning social approval by publicly condemning and humiliating you in what quickly becomes a competition to see who can strike the blow that knocks you down so you never get up again. nobody cares about who you are outside of what you did. people make mistakes and hurt one another, but there is always the capacity for change, for regret and reparations. you are an irredeemable monster. you can't change. the only way to make sure you can't cause harm ever again is to neutralise you entirely. to drive you off and hurt you so badly that you never consider coming back. and it often succeeds. but it doesn't make the world a better or safer place. it just tells everyone that certain behaviours will be punished, so you should conceal them, and harshly condemn them in others so that everyone knows where you stand; nobody will stand up for you if you're accused and brought out for judgement, so you shouldn't trust anyone, and always be on the lookout to take them down before they can do the same to you. you're not creating a safe, welcoming community. you're creating a panopticon built on fear and punishment.
#🐉#yes ive been the target of multiple harassment campaigns. yes i was in the wrong and deserved to be held accountable.#no i didnt deserve to be treated like that. and no i didnt change because people were cruel to me.#i changed because i was lucky enough to have friends who supported me and pointed out that they wanted me to be better because they cared#their disappointment and earnest belief in my capacity to be a better person was what made me realise i could and needed to do better
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Loss.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#wen qing#If you include the 11 bonus comics I've done; this is the 200th comic of PD-MDZS B*)#Thank you all for your patience and support as I have honed my skills and pressed on with uploading my comics.#Even when I have gone through turbulent moments and struggled with stress and grief -#-I've been so thankful to have something that reminds me that I have the capacity to create and bring about joy into this world.#This community has some of the biggest hearts I've ever seen. Thank you for everything.#I can't believe I've done 200 comics for this series. And it isn't over yet! Keep rooting for me and I'll keep on drawing! Lets do this!#“OP are you not going to comment on this scene?” No. I'll let this one simmer <3
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Steve, on the phone in the background of Eddie’s live-stream: Hey, Dustin. I don’t know what you did but Lucas said it was unforgivable and Max won’t even talk about it.
Steve: Whatever it is, you need to apologize to Will. Like right now.
Steve: Anyways, call me back when you get this message. Love you, buddy.
Steve: *hangs up*
Eddie, concerned: …What did he do?
Steve: Oh. Nothing.
Steve: He was just mean to me yesterday so I want him to suffer a little bit.
#Eddie: …I always forget that you have a great capacity for evil#Steve: You learn that if you were popular. it’s not brute force that keeps you on top. it’s psychological warfare#Meanwhile Dustin: What the hell did I do????#eddie munson tiktok saga#steve harrington#eddie munson#dustin henderson
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Scott Patterson, Cary Elwes, Leigh Whannell and James Wan at Saw blood drives.
#{ROTTING FOX}#give it up for leigh I have no capacity for embarrassment whannell#being mutilated and homosexual with your killer gets you puss#scott patterson#cary elwes#leigh whannell#james wan#can we get some James appreciation#missed the saw blood drive glad they brought it back#saw 1#saw#saw 2#saw 3#saw 4#saw 5#saw 6#saw 3d#saw x#saw 2004#Peter Strahm#lawrence gordon#adam faulkner stanheight
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I swear this is what it felt like listening to TMAGP 19
#i didnt have the mental capacity to think about it#just had to let it slide over me like water#tmagp#the magnus protocol#tmagp spoilers#mine#magnus protocol
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jace i don’t feel good was so funny but also made me so sad. like that’s a teenager with a strawberry squishmallow keychain and a tamagotchi and she doesn’t feel good and she's tugging on a teacher’s sleeve about it. a teacher who should have been responsible for protecting her in the first place and didn’t. who is manipulating and using her and her friends to help fulfill the desires of a wrathful power-hungry egomaniac. porter and jace it’s on sight >:(
#help the rat grinders make me sad i have a disease.#idk man. it’s not a big deal it’s a comedy show i can be normal. sure#edit:#also this isn’t meant to be infantilizing she is absolutely gonna fuck them up next episode lol. and good for her#also bc apparently there’s discourse about this this isn’t to say that the ih shouldn’t be fighting she and the rat grinders to their full#lethal capacity. like stepping back kid v. kid violence makes me sad but they’re trying to end the world lol. and also the ih can play at#their table literally however they want to#it’s a show#just to be clear that that’s not what this post is about lol#mary ann skuttle#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#fhjy spoilers
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cat nap :3
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#itadori yuuji#kugisaki nobara#fushiguro megumi#fanart#jjk fanart#jjk atla!au#atla!au: art#atla!au: illust#yuuji#megumi#nobara#KARUCCHI AGENDA HOURS PSPSPSPSPPSS#i made him. Bigger . its what he deserves its what yuuji deserves its what they all deserve#and most importantly its what i deserve . i think a giant cat with wings would fix me#originally had him even Bigger than this but then i remembered we'd already established his carrying capacity#that being 1 passenger comfortably and 2 with some difficulty#now that i retconned him 2 be the size of a small vehicle i think he can carry 2 comfortably but 3 is still a stretch . hed get tired :(#probably cant get airborne with 3 passengers on his back#especially because yuuji is carrying several pounds of rocks#and nobara has multiple chunks of metal on her at all times#and megumi has enough emotional baggage to ground an aircraft#karucchi can only do so much FHFJH the poor baby doesnt even have hollow bones#but hes SO CUTE HES SO GD CUTE I WANT HIM IW ANT ONE SO BAD i want . giant flying CAT#CAN U IMAGINEEEEEE#PSPPSPSPPSPPPSPSP
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Personal space
Based on @little-black-dress-zack-fair's post <3
#zakkura#clack#cloud strife#zack fair#final fantasy vii#ff7#the idiot i am i thought i remembered the post#wanted to draw it since august#and only when i went to check the text i found out i remembered wrong#lays down#sorry#unfortunately i don't have either time energy or capacity to redraw this now ;;#sorryyyy#las!art
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most of the polaroids i drew for operation walburga's arbitrary no kissing ever rule in collaboration with erins_escapism on insta who made the fic into the most beautiful bind <333
If you want to see all of 15 polaroids and also erin's binds you can find them both on my insta!! (courfee_)
#There are 5 more that i made but tumblr has the 10 images maximum thingy#jegulus#jegulus fanart#marauders fanart#regulus black#james potter#james x regulus#marauders#regulus black fanart#james potter fanart#starchaser#sunseeker#regulus x james#marauders era#jegulus fanfiction#fic: operation wanker#hp#mine#my art#*#Gods those binds is just. So fucking pretty you dont understand#I keep looking at them and screaming and grinning#Anyway these polaroids are a big part of the reason why i havent made much art recently#They may just be monochrome purple but making 18.5 drawings even like this still takes a lot of time and energy#Honestly mainly energy#I only have so much drawing capacity#And especially since right before i startrd i did the jeggy kinktober thing i just reached a limit eventually and had to take a break
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I'm looking too far into it as always but Monty being a regular crow and then getting violently turned into a human without his permission for his owner's revenge plot, gaining human levels of emotion and intelligence and then having it all violently ripped away again without warning, assumably losing all of that human emotion and stuff is genuine psychological horror to me, especially when you factor in the whole being in a coma thing being a metaphor for his time as a crow with Esther like, is he ok?
#honestly if i think about it too hard it really freaks me out lol#cause like he wouldnt even have the capacity to mourn what he lost - he wouldnt even know what it meant to him#i hope hes ok#monty the crow#monty finch#dead boy detective agency#dead boy detectives#dbda
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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#lbh#sqq#i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss#the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently#and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything#it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg#as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it#everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person#each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it#at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same#and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical#because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING#aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying#but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line#anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series#i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix#i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship#bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once#bizarre#my art
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