#I dont do deal with emotions well but

[triglycercule]

alright,,,,,is this newyears gift,,,,,, i dont no. but maybe it's late enough that i'll be able to forget that i drew this 😁😁😁😁 mttpoly doodles. whoever sees this sees this

[yeonbam]

People who wonder why Jack is so sensitive about Joke’s constant theft to get his way, even if it is for Jack, forget that one of the main prejudices against economically struggling classes of people is that those from privileged classes look at them with suspicion of crimes like theft literally chronically.

And Jack is the kind of person who is extra hard on himself because of the things he doesn’t have and he wants to escape this ‘othering’, this dehumanization of sorts, by using with what he has— his skills and knowledge, i.e. socially acceptable means.

This aversion to theft is seen even in Tattoo’s mother when she chastises her son for stealing from Boss despite how much they are literally suffering because of him. To escape prejudice against poor people being inherent thieves, they have to be ten times better than the average person, can't be immoral the same way the rich are, or else their suffering magically becomes "deserved" because they're not "good poor people."

YET, the complexity of this othering is so deep that even wanting to be self-reliant is frowned upon, as you see when Joke’s Dad criticizes Jack for being ‘poor but proud’ to want to give his grandmother the best medical treatment.

The reality is, the source of this ‘pride’/self-reliance, is literally… never having anyone who will help you out of your situations. Boss helping his grandmother with medicine was literally a scheme to use her to control Jack. And help for the hospital bills came at the price of his life and identity in the hands of Boss.

The first time Jack got help for his dream was from Joke and it ended in the shattering of his hopes due to betrayal and being almost involved in theft— of all things.

Jack is the amalgamation, of all these expectations from others and from himself. He is simultaneously inclined to be the perfect ‘victim’ and the saviour who, having lost his own childhood, wants to give all the things he never had to the children. It is going to be a chance for them and a second chance for himself. He formed this idea when he too was just a baby.

[frostbite-the-bat]

society if literally 80% of rw fandom and especially rw analysis youtubers (who are great, EXCEPT) stopped calling gourmand heckin' chonker chubby diabetic ginormous whatever and paid more mind to their whole character and not just the fact that they're fat

[icewindandboringhorror]

"We can get through this by working together, reach out to your friends, community is all we have, a social network will be your security in the world, now is the time to lean on others!"

I do agree, and it's scientifically sound (pretty sure there is data about how people with better social networks live longer and etc) but also....augh..... what about the severe social issues, difficulty to leave the house, physical issues which lead to like zero socialization energy a majority of the time, etc. etc. Social support can be a replacement for structural support, but.. I guess I just wish it didn't have to be. Community is extremely difficult to build, even moreso if you're someone who has issues with social cues or group conversations or even just being around others in the first place. And blah, nuance, of course I'm just complaining or maybe being too negative or maybe misunderstanding, but, I hardly have the energy to brush my hair once every 2 months.. how am I supposed to maintain a wide social network and be active in a Community and Join Groups lol... sometimes it kind of feels like "er.. well if thats my only option then...... ruh roh". It's overwhelming

[torchstelechos]

*Steeples fingers together* The peer review process is important, its good, it means that your biases dont get past first draft stage. Having said that it did hit me with the psychic blast of "Oh shit thats actually worst, you know thats worst right?"

[unionizedwizard]

ok now i just feel sad for [redacted person who's not on here]. i always forget how dire it is for women who date cishet men theyre literally fighting in the trenches out there

[zymstarz]

yeah sure that's how i'll [re]come out

[mushed-kid]

ok how do i know if my feelings are warranted/‘right’ or if im just dramatic and emotional ?

[dramadramallama]

your honor,

this might sound very specific—and it is—but do you know how much i yearn for easy, quick, normal, simple, no slow-mo, just everyday regular SMOOCHING in romance kdramas?

you'd think it'd be as common a thing to witness as dramatic make-out sessions under the rain, or love confessions during the first snowfall of the year, BUT honest to god these quick kisses are the rarest of pokémons. and i am always so stupidly thrilled when we have a newly established couple just act like... a newly established couple????

please let me see them giggle and be disgusting and childish like, this is what i signed up for?? they're supposed to be freshly in love and high on the fact they're being loved back!!! they're supposed to be silly with it!

anyway, all this to say, thank you the story of park's marriage contract for giving me exactly, and i mean eXACTLY, what i want out of two fictional people in love. candid moments.

i rest my case.

[scarletiswailing347]

hmm yknow ive never had to worry about this before cause all the fandoms ive been in ive never really been in the same space as the creators so i never had to worry about the ccs/creators seeing my liveblogs even if i only rarely did it before but since the lsers are here maybe i should just stop liveblogging?? cause like in case it wasnt obvious im a massive hater first and foremost and if theres one thing you dont show the creators its hate so like. idk maybe its time to stop for good

[anotherpapercut]

working with children really will make you examine your thought processes and emotional reactions like nothing else. I've found myself being so much more thoughtful in my daily life about how I respond to my emotions and environment, as well as the reasoning behind why others behave the way they do

[your-jellyfish-senpai]

This is just a personal post for posterity because it has been a fucking time this year, the last two months in particular.

The tl;dr current situation is: Ryan and I both have a crush on the same person and are considering a very specific kind of polyamory

The long story is so much more complicated than that because my own feelings were on a several-month delay so I instead started off with a major breakdown after learning that Ryan had a crush on a mutual friend because of my own insecurities (ample, plentiful, all-consuming) and fears (being abandoned, being replaced, not being good enough, etc.)

Avoiding the specifics because it's truly way too much to get into and frankly, much of what I initially felt, I've dealt with or completely done a 180 at this point lol.

But yeah. Even like, two weeks ago, the concept of polyamory for myself and our relationship freaked me the fuck out. But now it's an open conversation and who fucking knows what's gonna happen.

Anyway. I still have a lot of work to do because my body image is truly horrendous and I've only recently realized that not everyone has the depth and intensity of self-hatred for their physical appearance that I do. And Ryan has been telling me that they think I am "much more attractive" than I think I am. To which I can't help but respond "sounds fake but okay" or "wild if true."

This has been such a fucking insane period of my life and I haven't really talked about it with anyone except Ryan (and Kaden, ty Kaden) so if you're an IRL friend reading this... sorry lol it's been Complicated and Uncomfortable and Scary As Hell.

But no matter what happens here on out, I do at least feel pretty secure in our relationship and feel like we've once again leveled up our communication.

[gardensnakie]

How’s life? No pressure question ofc, but if you want to share please feel free to do so with this ask :3

Eh, it doesn't feel all that great right now. I'm tired and hungry a lot, but I just have to get a routine together. My sleep has been wonky, I've been waking up too early, but I feel fine then but it also feels like I can't rest completely- I have dreamless nights mostly. And I also just get annoyed a lot, but it feels better being around people I like.

[phagodyke]

aouuugh my uterus......

[sillybouquetoflillies]

i keep thinking i rly didnt go thru that much growing up, but idk, everytime i tell someone abt my life, they say i did and kinda just like sit in shock abt it. am i just internet brained or smth, or am i just dramatic?? i rly dont think ive earned a lot of the symtoms of someone who was traumatized that i have. or maybe i havent been in a safe place for long enough to process things??? i dunno. maybe someday far away in the future ill figure things out

[the-kipsabian]