donottrustsistergoldenhair

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

medieval texts where gawain shows up out of nowhere ranked by how annoyingly disruptive he is

Lancelot and the Hart With the White Foot. 1/10. He’s very dramatic but all his drama is about how much he loves Lancelot, so like, that’s relatable and gay of him. He gets 1 point of annoying for dragging a guy behind his horse in what I’m sure he smugly thinks is a really epic Iliad reference.

Meraugis de Portlesguez. 3/10. He’s pretty useless, which is a bit endearing, and he has to get his ass rescued by someone he’s never met, which is satisfying. In the end he does pull an annoying stunt where he talks the whole court into liking him again after they’ve decided they hate him, which is pretty smarmy but also the only reason they hated him was because he sacrificed his honour to lend his support to the protag. Okay, okay, this Gawain has integrity, I can admit it.

The Marvels of Rigomer. 5/10. I haven’t actually read this yet because it’s very expensive, but the whole thing was written as an excuse for the author to complain about Lancelot’s popularity, which is inherently pretty funny, and also means that Gawain was inserted literally just as a tool to bash Lancelot. I’ve read exactly one excerpt of this text and it’s when Lancelot sleeps at a dude’s house and then robbers attack him so he hunts them through the house and then “flattens” them with a beam of wood, and in my opinion Gawain showing up to detract from this is an inherently annoying act, because I would read about Lancelot violently flattening robbers with a beam of wood for as many pages as I could.

Perceval or the Story of the Grail. 6/10. He does have an illicit hookup in a tower with a random chick which results in both of them almost getting set on fire by an angry mob, and then dips, leaving her to deal with it. On the other hand he also takes time out of his quest to protect a little girl who’s getting bullied by her sister. On the other other hand he listens to a guy recount how he wants to viciously kill Sir Gawain out of revenge, and you can just hear the smugness dripping off his voice when the guy finally asks him who he is and he gets to say he’s Sir Gawain.

Morien. 8/10. Gawain is really nice in this text but he occupies way too much of the screentime. I am so invested in Morien’s quest to bond with his estranged deadbeat father, I do not want to read about Gawain getting publicly tied to a torture device while naked. That is too much. His horny and suggestive energy has no place in this most wholesome of texts.

Gliglois. 9/10. Decides he’s in love with the protagonist’s crush and when the protagonist gets the girl instead of him, tries to befriend him and act like they’re best buddies so the rest of the court assumes he has clout by association. Pathetic desperate man.

Yvain or the Knight of the Lion. 10/10. This is the most annoying Gawain has ever been. His cousin gets married and he shows up to yank him away to party for a year and in the process gets him divorced, which results in him living in the forest naked for 3 years, during which time Gawain never once goes to look for him. After Yvain gets out of the forest, he wanders around for a few years incognito, and Gawain still never once wonders what happened to his favourite cousin. Then when they fight he can’t even have the decency to properly lose to Yvain, no, he’s gotta be all humble and GRACIOUSLY INSIST YVAIN WON despite it being a tie. I wish Yvain had just hauled out and punched him.

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

so many articles about Fast Fashion, not enough articles about what the hell is happening to the quality of clothes

Like okay. People own more pieces of clothing nowadays and they wear them a lesser number of times before throwing them out. BUT.

Why do we pretend like this is pure vanity or careless wastefulness, rather than forced by the qualities of the clothes themselves?

The other day, I was going through boxes of old clothes in the basement in search of fabric to practice sewing on. The difference in quality of the fabrics themselves is shocking! The worn-out old jeans from twenty years ago are MUCH thicker and tougher than anything more recent. My old baby clothes are made as sturdy as my work clothes from today.

In the past couple years, I have had entire seams rip out of clothes on the first wash. That's not normal!

Polyester blend shirts that feel cozy and soft when they are new, become scratchy and rough after 20 washes or so. I am trying to avoid polyester, but it gets harder and harder; the other day i couldn't find a single pack of crew socks that was 100% cotton. SOCKS!

Also, pilling is out of control. The newest pants I bought developed pills within a single day of walking around campus with a backpack.

These companies are trying to frog-boil us but touching clothes from twenty years ago, the useless crap of today would stick out like a sore thumb...

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

Tim Curry

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

SO guys there’s this movie where nicole kidman plays a russian mail order bride and she comes to england to live with this guy and she only has like two bags and in the scene after she unpacks you can see that she only brought one thing to put up on her wall and it’s a moderately sized poster of 70s BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN that just says BRUCE. in russian. БРЮС.

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

Do you like spicy food?

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

everybody say Happy Birthday to our favourite bbgirl, FRIEDRICH SCHILLER

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

I am a man of constant sorrow.

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

Did you ever drink alcohol (beyond like drinking a sip of wine for communion or something) in your teens?

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

Have you ever blocked an artist because you don’t like their art style?

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

Incredible new guy just dropped... and we have an update as well:

Image ID three screenshots from two separate posts on Reddit from the same user, the first, dated two days ago reads:

So, this happened a few days ago, and I’m still trying to process it. For context, I (28F) have been with my BF (30M) for about 2 years. We live together, and I’ve always done most of the cooking because I genuinely enjoy it, and he claims he can’t “even boil water” without setting off the smoke alarm.

The other night, I made one of our favorite meals, and while we were eating, he got a weird smirk on his face. He then says, “You know, I’ve been taking notes.” I laughed, thinking he was joking, but then he said, “No, really. I made a presentation.”

I still thought it was a joke until he got up, connected his laptop to the TV, and opened a PowerPoint titled “Improving Our Home Dining Experience.” I was in disbelief as he went slide by slide critiquing my dishes: “Slide 1: Too Much Garlic,” “Slide 2: Pasta Consistency,” “Slide 3: More Salt, Less Sass.”

The kicker was Slide 8, which was just a photo of Gordon Ramsay facepalming with the caption, “What he’d think.”

I was stunned. I told him if he had such detailed opinions, he should cook himself. He tried to backtrack, saying it was “all in good fun” and that he was “just trying to help.” But I wasn’t laughing. I haven’t cooked since, and now he’s been living off cereal and takeout. He’s sulking, saying I’m overreacting and “ruining the joke.”

So, Reddit, AITA for refusing to cook after my BF presented me with a PowerPoint critique of my cooking?

Edit: Thanks for all of your comments and support, I just posted an update!! End first post. The second post, dated today reads:

Hey, Reddit! So, it’s been a wild ride since I posted my original story about my (now ex) boyfriend’s infamous PowerPoint presentation critiquing my cooking. I can’t thank you enough for all the support, laughs, and even the outrage on my behalf. Buckle up, because here’s the follow-up you didn’t know you needed.

After reading your comments and taking some time to process what happened, I decided that our relationship needed a serious talk. I sat him down to discuss how his presentation came across as not just unfunny, but pretty disrespectful. You know, typical mature relationship stuff.

Well, what does he do? He smirks and goes, “Oh, I was prepared for this!” He actually grabs his laptop, connects it to the TV again, and presents me with another PowerPoint titled “How to Take a Joke: A Comprehensive Guide.”

Yes, folks, he made a whole slideshow explaining why I needed to learn how to “chill out” and “appreciate humor.” Slide 1 featured a meme of a clown putting on makeup with my name plastered over it. Slide 2? A bullet point list titled, “Why Your Overreaction is Hilarious.” Slide 3 was titled, “How I’m Clearly the Comedian in this Relationship.”

At this point, I was too stunned to speak. But then he pulled out Slide 6: “Things You Can Do While Not Cooking (Because You’re Mad).” The audacity, right? It was as if he really thought he’d win me over with this next-level presentation. Spoiler alert: he did not.

So, I did what any rational, PowerPoint-loving person would do. I made my own. I stayed up all night crafting a presentation called “Why It’s Time to Move On: A Farewell Guide.” It had everything: flowcharts mapping his incompetence in the kitchen, pie charts illustrating my happiness before and after “The Great Presentation Debacle,” and my personal favorite—Slide 9, a GIF of Gordon Ramsay yelling: „GET OUT!”

This morning, I sat him down and went through my PowerPoint with the same energy he had given me. His reaction was priceless. He started with that same smirk but lost it somewhere around Slide 4: “Top Ten Reasons You’re Moving Out Today.” By the time I got to the “Resources for Finding Your Own Apartment” slide, he was packing a bag.

Now, before anyone worries, yes, he did actually leave. And no, I didn’t even have to threaten him with Slide 12, which was just a photo of me blocking the Wi-Fi router.

So, yeah, we broke up, and I’m single, happy, and cooking meals for myself without any critique except my cat’s judgmental stare. And to those who said I should make a “breakup PowerPoint,” just know your wish has been fulfilled…

I still can’t believe how all of this went down over the course of one single weekend. But I now feel pretty good about myself. Thanks for all of your comments and support!

PS: Oh, and fun fact, some of you were right: he actually is a business consultant, so making PowerPoint presentations is quite literally his day job. I guess he took “bringing work home” to a whole new, unwelcome level.. End ID.

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

There are time when I’m reading Arthurian sources for my comic and I’m like “I may not like this, but in order to keep the spirit of the story I need to figure out how to appreciate it and work it in to my larger story despite the problems I personally I have with it.” And then there are times when I’m like “Shut up Malory, I do what I want and your idea was dumb and stupid.”

[donottrustsistergoldenhair]

why is ridiculously exaggerated boob jiggling considered sexy anyway? boobs are nice n all but i can’t take it seriously when an anime gif looks like the character’s breasts are fighting for dominance

also do people without boobs not know that boob jiggling is like wicked uncomfortable / can even hurt? these titatically tittied toons wouldn’t be smiling with bobbyflop like that they’d be wincing like no tomorrow