#I am not a doctor and I cannot give you medical advice

[chaotic-archaeologist]

I saw a thing that was ask a doctor? So imma ask you somethin. Uh- so I've had a sore throat for a few days and I just suddenly got lightheaded. Google says strep. I'm very worried now but the thing is- I REALLLY don't wanna tell my mom. What do I do?

I am not a doctor. I am a graduate student pursuing a PhD in archaeology, so even if I was a doctor, I couldn't help you. I am also just a random guy on the internet, and though I sometimes refer to myself as everyone's internet brother, there are certain matters that you shouldn't entrust to someone you do not know. Your health is one of them.

Like I said, I'm not a doctor, but I can tell you exactly what a medical doctor would tell you if you had asked them:

You need to seek treatment with an in person medical professional.

Doctors cannot treat people over the internet unless it is under the very specific circumstances of an authorized telehealth platform. Even then, there are certain conditions that cannot be assessed without an in person medical exam. It is also illegal for doctors to provide medical advice online.

Strep is a bacterial infection caused by Streptococcus pyogenes, which is diagnosed by doing a throat swab to detect the bacteria. If left untreated, the infection of some strains of this bacteria can progress to scarlet fever, which is a more severe illness that can lead to permanent health problems affecting heart, joints, nervous system and skin.

Strep is also highly treatable with antibiotics, which can only be prescribed by a medical doctor following a positive strep test. By avoiding medical treatment, you also avoid the possible treatment and open yourself up to potential complications.

You may also not have strep. The internet cannot provide an accurate diagnosis. Google, WebMD, or any sort of AI are not substitutes for the appropriate diagnostic processes and the assessment of a trained professional.

I understand that there may be any number of reasons why you don't want to tell your parents. Unfortunately, one of the important parts of becoming an adult who is in charge of their own body is to make choices to take care of said body, even if those choices make you uncomfortable.

Barring any sort of unsafe home situation you do not mention in your ask, the most responsible thing to do is to tell your parents how you've been feeling and ask them to help you get yourself to the doctor. Alternatively, if you are living in an unsafe home environment, you can look for places that provide healthcare to at-risk youth, generally at low to no cost.

You need to see a doctor so they can determine what condition you do actually have and then inform you of the appropriate next steps to treat your illness.

-Reid

[tj-crochets]

Went to the doctor just for a check up and he basically just told me "your body just processes sugar very well! :) :) :) It's a good thing! :) :) :) It can't possibly be the source of your symptoms even though eating fixes it :) :) :)" But there was also a moment when talking about my iron deficiency that is possibly one of the funniest things a doctor has ever said to me, up with the cardiologist who said "you're a medical mystery": He was going over my blood test results, and said "Your iron levels haven't gone up at all, they are still extremely low, but you're not anemic anymore" And I was like how am I not anemic anymore??? And he said "Your hemoglobin levels have gone up...somehow..." while frowning at the blood test results on his computer. It was very "somehow, palpatine has returned" lol

[leveragehunters]

I'm putting my response to this in it's own post. Nothing but respect for the rightful criticisms of the situation described in those articles. The problem is that the articles by Danielle Cahill are grossly, almost negligently, misleading.

I'm not your lawyer and this is not legal advice, but I am an autistic Queensland lawyer who's pretty ticked off at Cahill.

Cahill's articles:

Autistic drivers could find their licences in legal limbo depending on where they live after new standards introduced

New national Fitness to Drive standards are 'discriminatory' and 'humiliating' for autistic drivers, psychologists say

Short version:

If you're autistic you do not automatically have to obtain a medical clearance to hold a Queensland Drivers Licence and there is no 'list of reportable conditions', much less one that includes autism.

Long version with receipts:

The first article purportedly cites a Department of Transport and Main Roads (Transport) spokesperson who they claim said: "…all autistic drivers in Queensland have since 2012 been required to obtain a medical clearance from a doctor to show they are fit to drive." It also says: "In Queensland, the Department of Transport and Main Roads (TMR) requires drivers to obtain a medical clearance form from a doctor confirming they are fit to drive despite being autistic."

The second article says: "According to the state's Department of Transport and Main Roads (TMR), autism was added to the list of reportable health conditions in 2012."  Oh, but wait, what's this from just a little further up in the same article? "A TMR spokesperson told ABC News that "there is no specific legislation that states that people with autism cannot drive".

Let's talk about that specific legislation

Despite what the spokesperson said, there was no change to the law in 2012. A new Transport Regulation, which contains the law about medical clearances for Queensland drivers licences, was, however, passed in 2021. (link to the Regulation)

Typo or ignorance? Why not both.

The 2021 Regulation did not substantively change the law. The new Regulation was a consolidation, modernisation, and streamline of multiple pieces of overlapping legislation. (Explanatory notes)

'Jet's Law', which sets the rules for driver medical clearances, was first introduced in 2008. (Ministerial Statement). It was moved from the old Regulation to the new 2021 one essentially unchanged.

Jet's Law in chapter 3, part 6, division 1 of the 2021 Regulation

Jet's Law as passed in the previous Regulation (scroll down to page 64)

The law in Queensland re: medical clearances is the same as it was in 2008. The only changes were to language, consistent with modern drafting standards, and the addition of a requirement to not drive until you've given notice if a condition develops or worsens.  

What does Jet's Law say?

Section 177 of the 2021 Regulation states:

A person who applies for the grant or renewal of a Queensland driver licence must, when making the application, give a notice to the chief executive about any mental or physical incapacity that is likely to adversely affect the person’s ability to drive safely.

Key words: any mental or physical incapacity that is likely to affect the person's ability to drive.

If you're autistic and your autism isn't likely to affect your ability to drive safely, Jet's Law doesn't require you to give notice to Transport.

But what about that list of reportable conditions the article claims exists?

It doesn't exist. There is no list of reportable conditions.

Transport DOES provide some examples of medical conditions that are likely to affect your ability to drive. You can see them here:

https://www.support.transport.qld.gov.au/qt/formsdat.nsf/forms/S5040/$file/S5040.pdf

https://www.qld.gov.au/transport/licensing/update/medical/fitness#medcond

Here's the licence application form: https://www.support.transport.qld.gov.au/qt/formsdat.nsf/forms/qf3000/$file/f3000_es.pdf. Question 7 states that you must report any medical conditions that may adversely affect your ability to drive and asks if you have any of the following conditions:

Vision or eye disorder (other than wearing glasses or contact lenses) that may adversely affect your driving

Diabetes that requires treatment by tablet, insulin or other medication

Been diagnosed with epilepsy, experienced a seizure; or been required to take anti-epileptic medication after the age of 11

Any other medical condition/s that is likely to adversely affect your ability to drive safely

You know what I don't see anywhere? Autism.

But what about the National Standards?

Cahill managed to get that part of the articles almost right.

All Queensland drivers, regardless of age, must meet the national standards to ensure their health or any physical disability does not increase the risk of a crash. (confirmed by Transport) And before you ask, the national standard is not a list of 'reportable conditions'. (Even if it was, the autism update happened in 2022, not 2012). But what is the national standard if it's not a list of reportable conditions?

The national driver medical standards Assessing Fitness to Drive set out the considerations and medical criteria for safe driving. They also guide the management of drivers with health conditions so that they may continue to drive for as long as it is safe to do so. The standards are used by health professionals to assess and manage patients with health conditions that may affect their ability to drive safely. These assessments and the standards themselves inform Driver Licensing Authority decisions about driver licensing.

The national standard does refer to "Other neurological conditions including autism spectrum disorder and other developmental and intellectual disabilities". Yes, it was updated in 2022, as indicated by a big red banner across the top of the page. The update notes state:

The review identified that information and guidance was required to enable assessment of persons with ASD. Specialist advice noted that the variability of ASD characteristics and the degree of severity were too diverse for a specific standard. General guidance is however provided in the text of the chapter.

Wait, the review? The changes were made because of a review? They weren't a secret sneaky change as Cahill alleged? There was a public review that called for submissions from stakeholders?  Yes there was.

The review concluded there was not enough evidence to determine the MVC (motor vehicle crash) risk associated with ASD, and "Specialist advice noted that the variability of ASD characteristics and the degree of severity were too diverse for a specific standard."

So what does the standard actually say about autism?

The impact of other neurological conditions including autism spectrum disorder (ASD) and developmental and intellectual disability should be assessed individually. A practical driver assessment may be required. If the degree of impairment is static, periodic review is not usually required. People with ASD can have differences in social communication and interaction, with restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviour, interest and activities. Although evidence from driving studies are limited, drivers with ASD may drive differently from people without ASD. Shortcomings in tactical driving skills have been observed, while rule-following aspects of driving are improved. There is considerable difference in the range and severity of ASD symptoms, so assessment should focus on these and the significance of likely functional effects, rather than an ASD diagnosis.

So what does that mean?

It means we're right back at Jet's Law, in section 177 of the 2021 Regulation.

If you have a mental or physical incapacity that is likely to affect your ability to drive you need to declare it.

Could this include autism? Yes.

Does it automatically include autism? Not according to any law or standard currently in force in Queensland.

If you're an autistic Queenslander, your obligations under Jet's Law and the update to the national standard mean it's important that you consider whether your autism is likely to affect your driving ability and, if so, declare it. If it's not, then don't.

[Reminder: I am not your lawyer and this is not legal advice]

[lorddocmarten]

🦇Tips for Dressing Goth on Low-Spoons Days🦇

Note: I am low-support needs disabled, and what works for me might not work for you. I am not a doctor and cannot offer medical advice!

Black hair, baby. I dye my roots with $1.25 men's beard dye from the 'tree now, so that's pretty cost-effective, and you don't have to do anything for your hair to look 'goth'. I wouldn't recommend a mohawk because for it to look maximum cool, you have to style it, and that can take a while. My haircut now is shaved on the sides with short bangs and it looks goth even if I don't style it. It requires minimum maintenance, too.

Pre-layered accessories. Many necklaces- especially ones marketed for 80s costumes- are pre-layered and you only have to work with one clasp. Maximum style for minimum effort. You can find layered necklaces on Amazon, at Halloween stores, and I've even seen them in the costume section of thrift stores. There are also bangle stacks that function the same way.

Strega Fashion and Lagenlook- this might work for wheelchair users, depending on how long your flowy elements are. Lots of tunics and skirts and sweaters and fancy hooded tops, etc. Think of a dark, witchy vibe. Very comfortable and can be easy to style with clothes-you-find-at-Wal-Mart, and relatively cheap.

Nails. I LOVE having long dark red nails for maximum 'spoiled vampire prince' vibes, but sometimes having acrylics or press-ons can be too expensive, impractical, or maybe too femme for you. Whatever the case, I have more recommendations than your standard black nail polish- there's silver nail polish that makes your nails look mirror-like, red nail polish of all shades, purples, etc. For a more masculine, deathrock look you could experiment with dark, zombie-esque greens, or even neon shades to stand out against your darker clothing. Painting my nails can be hard for me due to my coordination issues, so I keep Q-tips nearby and soak them in acetone to clean up the edges.

Eyeliner- they sell jumbo eyeliner sticks and you can basically roll that about your eyes, smudge with your finger, and call it done in about one minute. I have yet to find a sharpener to go with mine, which is unfortunate, but these would seemingly be the way to go when you don't have the spoons to pull out the white base and all that.

Shave your eyebrows. Not necessarily for everybody, but it gives a more alien or 'more human than human' vibe to your look without makeup and makes me look infinitely more goth even in jeans and a t-shirt. YMMV.

Piercings, if you want them, can get them, won't affect your job, etc.- these always look pretty alternative especially when combined with each other. These combined with the black hair will do the job for you, in my opinion. I currently only have my ears double pierced but plan on getting my septum done soon.

[theresattrpgforthat]

@alizarinessence thank you for your patience as I took my time to respond to you! PbtA games can be pretty daunting, and I certainly didn't understand how the play flow was supposed to work at first. I personally learned through trial and error, as well as watching other GMs who had figured it out - I am blessed to have a friend who is very experienced in running PbtA games so I was able to play in some of his games and ask him questions.

That being said, there have been a few things that I've also found helpful that I can refer to you, so I'm going to put them up here.

The Flow Chart

This flow chart was originally posted in a Dungeon World reddit post, and later referred to me when I started asking for PbtA advice. You'll likely see a similar flow chart in Apocalypse Keys, where Rae Nedjadi illustrates how a typical session of play is likely to look like.

In any given PbtA game, you as a GM are going to be presenting pieces of information to the players, just as you would in any other ttrpg. PbtA codifies this information as "moves," and each game will present you with information that is considered useful for the kind of story that it is design to tell.

In Masks, the players are teenage superheroes, so the game encourages the GM to introduce facts such as "civilians are in danger" or "your dad thinks you're being irresponsible."

In The Ward, the players are medical doctors in an Emergency Ward, so the game advises the GM to introduce truths such as "a patient's condition is worsening" or "someone's dad is fighting with a nurse in another room."

This reinforces the common maxim that the game is a conversation, a cycle of presenting new information, letting players decide what they want to do with that information, and making a roll if the fiction calls for it. This is a rather simplified cycle of course - the "see what happens" sections may include moments when players may jump in with their own characters' reactions, generating more events that the GM doesn't need to add to in order to make them interesting. Many PbtA games thrive off of player conflict, which can occupy the table for a couple of hours without the GM needing to add anything (Last Fleet is a good example of this kind of play.)

Listening to Others

Listening to other people play PbtA games can give you a sense of how the game is meant to feel, especially when the GM's and players take their time to talk through their moves and how they work.

I found Monster Hour to be exceptionally helpful; they started out as a Monster of the Week podcast, and even though I've never run MotW specifically, listening to Quinn talk the players through how to ask questions or use different moves made the game very easy for me to understand.

Joining a Community

Joining a community that loves a specific PbtA game, or PbtA games in general can be very helpful when seeking out advice. The PbtA Discord channel has a number of players and designers, who have a lot of game experience and are more than happy to dish out advice.

Start With Games That Have Guide-Rails

Not all PbtA games are created equal, and while the original spirit of the game was to make sure you didn't plot out a story-line, there's still some games that have a certain amount of prep that will give you the tools you need to gain confidence as a GM. Here's some of my favourites:

Visigoths vs. Mall Goths can be played as a one-shot, and doesn't require players to make a lot of decisions when putting their characters together. It has a number of scenarios that you can throw at your players, a mapped-out mall with details on all of the NPCs (and whether or not you can flirt with them), and some pretty hard limitations on what you can and cannot do. You can't leave the mall, for example - go through an exit on one side of the mall and you'll just pop back in on the other. You can visit the stores throughout the day, but each team of players can only go to so many places before the mall is closed for the day, therefore bringing the mission to a close.

Apocalypse Keys has a game structure that looks daunting but can be broken down into steps, and also comes with pre-written scenarios as well as instructions on how to create your own. The concept is pretty straightforward - you're solving a mystery, and you need to do it before one of the Doors of the Apocalypse is opened. This puts the game on a timer, which helps GMs keep their players on task, and also provides the Game Master with a list of clues to drop into the story as the players look for them. I've heard very good things about how Brindlewood Bay, which inspired some of the mechanics in Apocalypse Keys, makes itself easy to run for new GMs, so if you can get your hands on that book, you might find it helpful!

Last Fleet is laser-focused on a very specific premise - you are humans, in space, running away from a terrible and insidious threat. What is more, this threat has the ability to infiltrate your fleet. The laser-focus brings everyone at the table to the same page pretty quickly, and the setting includes a mounting pressure track that will make sure things keep happening, so as the person running the game, you won't have to do much after you set up the initial scenario. The game also comes with some really good advice on where you want to start with your players, to make sure they're on edge, but not fully panicking yet. Then you just need to tip the scales enough to cause them to ask questions, make questionable choices, and start a series of actions that snowball into catastrophe.

Wrapping Up

This is all the advice I have for stepping into PbtA, but more than anything, I recommend just diving in and giving it a go! As with any GM-ing endeavour, you will likely walk away from your first session with a list of things that you'll want to do differently the next time around, but that's just a sign that you're learning.

[forcedtogrow]

Addressing Pre-T, Pre-transition Anons

I’m getting quite a few asks from pre-T guys about how much you can change your body pre-T, what exercises to do, how to fix body fat redistribution etc. and it has gotten to be a little too much so im making a blanket post regarding this topic. This post is MY VIEWS AND LIMITS. I am not trying to bully anyone, this is a kink blog for fun and I am not a teacher/doctor/counselor/therapist or parent. I am a fun big brother lmao.

1. There’s only so much you can change your body pre-T, and it’s totally dependent on your genetics and dedication to lifting/gaining muscle. Some guys are lucky and can easily pass without T by just working out, I wasn’t one of them but I’ve seen a handful of guys that did that before T. Even then, some of those guys needed T to get rid of an hourglass/pear shape.

2. You can’t spot lose body fat in hips/thighs/ass. You’d need to lose body fat everywhere, but pre-T your body is most likely to hold onto lower body fat because biology wants those fat reserves to make babies. It’s gross and dysphoria inducing but it’s true.

3. It’s worth it to work out pre-T, especially lifting, to create a solid base to work from. If you already have that you’ll grow so fast on T it’ll feel like magic. I won’t lie that it’s frustrating and awful, because I’ve been there and it feels like spinning the pedals on a bike without moving, but it does pay off.

4. Stay balanced with your diet and don’t force yourself into a crazy calorie deficit. It might not be the time to bulk if you feel like your body is reserving most energy as fat (could be your genetics or activity level), but maintaining a baseline that’s Not underweight is a good start.

5. I’m not in a place to tell you to bulk or cut, especially if I don’t know your height/weight/age/activity level. I am not a doctor or dietician and can only say what works for me and people I know.

6. Don’t just focus on one part of the body, do a full push/pull/legs routine at the very least. Like this: https://www.aston.ac.uk/sport/news/tips/fitness-exercise/push-pull-legs or this for a 6 day split: https://www.muscleandstrength.com/workouts/6-day-powerbuilding-split-meal-plan

You need to build full body strength, and more leg muscle can actually masculinize your body and make your hips more boxy.

7. If you can’t transition medically/socially for whatever reason your main focus should be getting out of that situation. This is going to sound harsh but I know many trans people who risked a lot, some trans femme friends that literally risked their lives, and you have to decide what’s important to you. I’m being real because you will only regret waiting—there is no replacement for transition, there is no joy like transition, there is no pain great enough to negate the many many benefits of transition.

I don’t want to get messages like “what if it’s illegal where I live!” That’s not what I’m talking about. It’s sucks, but you either transition or you don’t, and if you don’t that’s up to you, but I cannot assist with that decision. I gave up a lot to transition and waited several years to start hrt for reasons too personal to disclose. I ruined relationships with family among other things, so please do NOT ask me for advice on this because I will not be coddling/sweet. Being a man is hard and messy and a sacrifice.

8. I will tell you what I eat and give general advice of bulking/eating but I will not make a meal plan for you. Every body has different needs that only you and a dietitian can work through, I’m not a licensed professional and don’t want anyone to take what I eat as the only way to eat.

9. If you cannot transition because you are a minor stay off my blog. Sorry!!

[syn4k]

🌿

unfortunately the only way to solve not wanting to create things is to not create things until you want to create things again.

"but Six!" i hear you protest over the angry yells of all my followers. "that can't be true! i hate that!"

i hate it too. But listen up you self loathing chucklefucks this is IMPORTANT.

if your brain and body is telling you that you are tired and that you need to take a break, fucking listen to them. Do not ignore them and continue making things anyways.

I do not give a fuck about your making one thing per day streak. I do not give a fuck about your follower count or engagement or statistics or whatever the fuck. I do not fucking care how stubborn you are. This rule is set in the laws of the universe itself just like the laws of physics are.

If you do not schedule time for yourself to recharge, your body will automatically do it for you and it WILL NOT ASK POLITELY.

that's what burnout and writer's block IS! you cant make shit if you're too fucking tired and depressed and busy trying to function as a person and don't have any energy left over for creative work! creating things takes ENERGY and EFFORT even the most self loathing low quality shitpost stick figure youve ever doodled on the back of an napkin. That takes effort too. This is your body realizing that you're going past your own limits despite everything and forcibly shutting you down so that you physically fucking cannot anymore for your own health.

Full stop.

If you take the time that you need to rest and regain energy and use it instead to continue doing things that require energy, your body will force you to allocate that time to rest at some point eventually.

So yeah. Sleep in hard over the weekends. Do nothing. Be unproductive. Fuck capitalism and FUCK the Protestant work ethic. I am being so fucking serious right now. This isn't just me repeating what I've heard, this is me sharing things that I've had to learn the hard way over the span of literal fucking years because my dumb ass kept ignoring it too.

You are allowed to, and encouraged to, politely turn down outings with friends and family if you're too tired.

You are allowed to, and encouraged to, take a day off from school or work if you wake up and know in your bones that you are too tired. (Make sure to let your teachers know beforehand. They'll understand. Skipping a day of work is a whole nother can of radioactive horses that I don't want to open right now but others here may have advice. Check the notes.)

You are allowed to, and encouraged to, do nothing.

You are allowed to, and encouraged to, be "lazy" (if you're not enjoying the forced time off, you're not being lazy).

If you can only do the bare minimum to take care of yourself (i.e making low-effort meals, only using the bathroom twice a day, etc) then that's okay too. The more you rest, the more energy you'll slowly build up to do more things like going to the grocery store so that you don't starve and getting those assignments done and taking an extra two minutes to make yourself a glass of something warm in the mornings so that you don't want to die quite as much. Also, when you can, ask your friends for a script and call your doctor about prescribing you depression medication because I love you and this is not normal and you deserve better.

Living life is not supposed to make you want to die, and surviving is not the same as living.

your body has a built in hierarchy of needs and at the top of the list is creating things, which you can only do once you're at a certain level of energy and wellness. if something's wrong, your drive to create will be the first to go.

it's scary, but you'll be okay

be gentle and kind to yourself. imagine that your brain and body is a horse: kicking it when it's down and yelling at it to move won't help. you have to meet it where it's at and feed it and comfort it until it's ready to move on again. you can't write trail songs if you've got no path to roam

this quickly spiraled out of my hands but i am very passionate about this subject and also i love u. good luck.

[20dollarlolita]

The process of how I bought my wheelchairs.

Someone's asked for help on this, and I've written a couple of really thorough posts that I never published, but here's the short I intended this to be short, but it's not version.

IMPORTANT DISCLAIMER: This is not medical advice. I cannot provide medical advice. I am sharing my own experience, and it should not be used as your only research for this issue. Any time I am saying, "you," please note that it is a style choice to use the second person, and not an indication of giving advice.

Quick note: if your doctor prescribed you a chair, make sure you know what kind of chair was prescribed, and why. The best chair in the world is still awful if it doesn't do what you need.

Also if your insurance will cover a wheelchair then, once you've made sure that your insurance will cover the chair you need, make the smart choice about where you'll buy these things.

The first time that I was using a wheelchair full time, I was borrowing this one from a friend. This chair is about $500, so when I was buying my first chair for myself, I was looking at that price point. If a chair I was considering was notably more than $500, I knew I could just get my own copy of this chair that I was already comfortable with. The chair that I was borrowing was three years old and had been heavily used, so I was confident in this model's lifespan.

The other big advantage of this is that it ships free with Prime, which meant that it was easy to send to a friend when I was tired of watching her use a inexpensive chair to get around the Disney parks.

But then I went on ebay and learned about the magical world of secondhand wheelchairs. The short version of the story is that a wheelchair can outlive someone's need for it, and so it's not super uncommon to see someone selling an older wheelchair for much less than the chair is new. A lot of the time, these are custom or modular chairs. Instead of a basic chair that's set up to one-size-fits-probably-most, modular and custom chairs have 10+ pages of options to select from in their order form. When you're buying a new custom chair, you pick every option to make sure it's perfect for you. When your goal to buying a used chair is to just get one that's better for you than a Drive Super Sport one-size-fits-hopefully-you chair, the secret to buying on ebay is to find out what features you absolutely need, and then to check the other elements of the chair and see if they will work for you.

Quick note, at the time that I was buying my wheelchair, I actually already owned a wheelchair, and had decided it wasn't going to work for me to use full-time. This is an Invacare Tracer and it was, according to the tag, stolen from a wheelchair rental place in 2010, and according to my mom, stolen from my neighbor's to-be-burned pile in 2019. So if we don't count alleged crime as a cost, this wheelchair was free. This is a great example of a chair that's set up to be one-size-fits-no-one-perfectly.

This wheelchair would be better than nothing, but it's heavy, the wheels are really far back, and it doesn't really fit in my car. The tires have no tread and are pretty worn, so they don't do great for outdoor offroading. All detachable parts of this (armrests, foot rests) had been lost a decade ago, and they're not cheap to replace. I already knew what kind of budget I was willing to spend, and I felt that just using this as my main mode of movement wasn't going to be worth the saving of the $500.

I do still use this wheelchair a LOT in my house, because it's a pain to get my real wheelchair out of my car and into my house (because stairs), but I wouldn't feel confident taking it out on the town unless I have someone to push me.

So the secret to buying a wheelchair on ebay is a three step process:

Determine how much money you're able to spend. The best wheelchair in the world isn't going to do you any good if you can't actually get it.

Determine what main features you want in a chair, and look for those.

When you find a chair that has those features at that price, check to see if everything else in the chair works for you.

(Secret step 4: be lucky enough to have someone listing the chair you need).

So I picked this chair (Which is a Quickie 2 Lite) mostly because the Medwarm wheelchair had been a bit too wide for me. This chair was narrower and had a lot of the traits of the Medwarm chair that I'd liked. It folded, had 24" wheels with tread, had feet plates that didn't stick way out in front. I didn't actually know how any of that felt until I had it, because I didn't have experience with multiple wheelchairs. My inexperience gave me a superpower, which was that I didn't need to get so critical of certain traits, because I had no idea what any of that meant.

Shipped and with tax, this was $400. At the time, I just went, "hey, this is like the wheelchair that I want, but without the negative trait of being as wide, and it's $100 less."

The main this about this chair that I learned that I love is that the center of gravity is farther forward than on the Medwarm chair (I believe it's set to +1"). This gave me a lot more power pushing myself. When I was using the Medwarm chair, it wasn't uncommon for me to ask friends to push me long distances. I very rarely needed that in the Quickie2.

But I did have to replace it.

Short version of a long story was that when I went to being a most-time wheelchair user, the seat of my chair got smaller relative to my body. I'd picked a narrower chair because it was easier to navigate the world, but I'd actually picked a chair that was becoming too small for me to fit my Kitten Holding Legs into. I looked into getting a new chair.

So let's talk about the wheelchair that I bought and couldn't use. We learn from our wins and our misses.

This is a 19" Catalyst 5. There's a few problems with this one for me, but they all sum up to (for me personally) that it had more negative (to me) traits than the Medwarm one, but also was more expensive. I'd picked this one because it looked like it'd be more like my Quickie2 than like the Medwarm, but it just wasn't good for me.

My Quickie2's narrow, so I could put my feet right next to each other. This was the most comfortable way for me to sit. The way that KI measures a Catalyst frame and the way Quickie measures a Quickie 2 frame are different. My 15" frame Quickie 2 had a 14" wide seat, and this 19" Catalyst 5 had a 22" wide frame. The first time that I unfolded it, I knew that it was just too big for me to use comfortably. In addition, I didn't like the solid low-profile tires. I didn't like how far away the wheels were. It also had a really nice quality back, but the back had to be removed to fold the chair, so it was another step to take in and out of my car. It was also about 2" shorter at the seat than my old chair, and I already deal with being too short for my store's counters, so I didn't like losing that height.

So this was a case where I looked for traits that I thought I wanted: folding, wider seat. Then, instead of checking to see if the rest of the traits of the chair were things that I wanted, I just assumed it'd be okay. Personally, it just wasn't the chair for me.

I ended up learning that selling a used wheelchair on ebay is actually pretty easy as well, so the money I lost on this purchase summed up to the cost of a roll of bubble wrap to pack it up to send it to someone who would benefit from it.

When I was looking for my next wheelchair, I had changed what I wanted out of a chair. I knew that I wanted tires with actual tread on them, instead of solid poly smooth tires. I knew that I wanted a wider seat, but not too wide. If it didn't come with a little bit of camber on the wheels (that's where they slant towards the top of the chair), I wanted to be able to add it. I also wanted it to be a minimum of 17" high seat. But the biggest change was that I'd decided that I didn't really need it to be folding.

I drive a hatchback with back seats that can fold down, and I pretty much never have passengers. I decided fuck it, if I'm not driving people, I don't need to keep the seats up, so I could get a non-folding chair and just shove the whole thing in the back without breaking down. Without breaking down the chair. I could still break down. Life is tough sometimes.

So this is a Quickie GT, which is an old, discontinued model. According to the serial number lookup, it was made in 2009. The good news is that it immediately passed the Cat Test.

When I was looking at this chair, I saw that it was designed for people who push themselves, and would probably be less good for someone who needed other people to push them. This wasn't an issue for me, because I hate being pushed.

(same chair plus two cans of spray paint)

This chair was over the $500 budget (it was $670 with shipping and tax), but this time I'd done enough research to be confident that it'd be a lot better for me than the Medwarm chair. I stuck with Quickie as a brand because I felt like I better understood how they size their seats. The serial number lookup said that this chair was 17" wide, so I was ready to get a 16" seat, and that's what I got. It's got pneumatic tires, which don't just have tread but also roll along the ground like bicycle tires. I love this chair. Instead of two separate foot rests, there's just the one, so I'm a lot more comfortable with how I sit.

It does have the downside of this is the smallest it gets without taking off the wheels. The wheels come off easily and so it's not a big problem, but it's more steps to get it into the car if I don't want to fold back my seats. Also, the front plate doesn't flip up or go away, so if I want to propel myself with my foot I'm a lot more limited.

Once I don't need this anymore, I'm also going to need to either sell it or figure out where to store it. I can keep a folding wheelchair in the back of my closet in case I need it again, but this one will be taking up some space.

For all of the chairs that I got, I was really only searching ebay for a couple of days before the right one at the right price showed up. This is somewhat slanted based on what I need, because certain things do show up more often than others, and at different prices. Wider chairs tend to have less selection and be more expensive, while 12-14" wide chairs are really plentiful.

Let's get together and look at some ebay chairs. We're going to search "wheelchair" and set condition to "used". If you plop the sort system into "price+shipping: lowest first" and then start scrolling until you get past all the wheelchair parts and all the "free local pickup: <location that is in another country>" and into the actual wheelchairs that can ship, you can start checking out the market.

I immediately eliminate anything that doesn't have all the parts, that is too expensive, that is only available for pickup, that doesn't have foot rests, or a few other things. The first one that I saw that I didn't elminate was this.

The most important thing from this listing is where they post the serial number.

And that's because KI, Sunrise, and Permobil all keep databases of all the serial numbers of all the chairs they have sold.

You can now go onto a site that sells that chair and look up what all those things mean. Spinlife sells the Catalyst 5Vx, and if you click "help me choose" on an item listing, it'll usually give you pictures of the different options. For me personally, the draw of this one would be that it's a really good price, and it's roughly set up the same as my default Medwarm chair. I don't like the tires but I do like the side guards and arm rest combo.

This was on a listing for a chair where the serial number wouldn't pull up. I wouldn't consider this one since I can't tell the width or depth when the seller won't list it and Sunrise doesn't have it. I'm just dropping this screenshot because "SELLER NOTE TO SELF" and "BUTT PAD NOT INCLUDED" both made me laugh.

As a quick final note, this is not going to be cheaper than getting a really basic wheelchair off Amazon. However, as someone who has used really basic wheelchairs, getting something upgraded has a whole lot of value. One of the reasons why I really like lolita fashion is that we treasure used things that still have use, and so it's also got some value to me to see if I can get something used that still has use. In my experience, things got better when I tried to get something used. If you do want a really basic chair, it might still be worth it to check if they're available for nearby pickup. Plopping my location into "free local pickup within 30 miles" offers me a basic Drive chair for $20. It's reusing something instead of having to throw it away, and it's also $20. Can't argue with $20.

Anyway, that's half diary entry and half possible advice.

[schizosupport]

hey, can i ask some advice? if u dont have any its fine!

i just got diagnosed and im getting on meds soon, and like, logically i know its good cause when im at my worst i am bad and i dont want to keep living life like that, but im terrified of medication like, any kind. the stuff im already on for like, chronic illness stuff was enough of a struggle but anti psychotics terrify me.

so basically, do u have any advice for someone getting on medication for the first time? i dont know anyone like me (schizophrenic style) and so i dont rlly have anyone to ask for advice

feel free to not answer if u dont want to, and thank u for ur time!!

Hey there anon!

My advice about antipsychotics, as well as any other psychiatric medication, is to give it a try with an open mind. Your mind should be open towards the possibility that this is helpful as well as the possibility that it's harmful. The most likely experience is that there will be things that suck about being on medication, and things that are easier on medication. And you need to be prepared to make a cost benefit analysis about what's right for you.

Another thing to keep in mind is "what kind and what dose". I often see people being put on a quite high dose right off the bat, because the psych has an idea that that's the "right dosis for psychosis". But actually people are very individual, and sometimes much less will do it.

I'm currently on the irriest bittiest baby dose of risperidone. When I was initially put on that 8-9 years ago, they soon gave me a dose that was much too high for me, and as a result I changed to another med (abilify) which was honestly way less compatible with me, but more tolerable at a higher dose.

So ... Doctors often don't like when you want to be informed and use Google to look into meds and stuff like that. But I cannot recommend it enough to look up the standard doses of the medication you get described, and see where your dose falls. If the med isn't having the desired effect, your psych might continue to increase the dose. It's good to know when enough is enough. Don't look up the side effects, but do keep a little list/diary about emerging physical or mental symptoms. And have someone else crosscheck that with the side effects at a point.

Some psychs will prescribe more than one antipsychotic to the same person long term. This is generally not recommended, so especially as an initial move, that would be a red flag to me. Same can be said for starting you out on a high dose, when it sounds like you aren't currently in a psychotic episode. If the med is intended as a longer-term stabilizer and not a way to shut down a psychotic episode, it shouldn't be at too high a dose. For many reasons, up to and including, you want to leave room to increase the dose if you do have a major psychotic episode and need extra help coming out of it.

With all those precautions made I also wanna say that antipsychotics CAN be a good and helpful tool. For me they help me sleep and they take the edge off in a way that nothing else really does. They increase my coherence and they give me a thicker skin to deal with the difficulties of life. In that way they make me stronger.

[cryptwrites]

writing injuries: 101

hi goblins and ghouls let me teach you how to write that silly little stab would you decided to give your silly little guy so that you could rip out the hearts of your reader, even more.

Hopefully you have gathered from the title that this will be discussing WOUNDS! BLOOD! GORE! OTHER NASTYS! If you disagree with my advice, MORE THAN OKAY! I'd love to hear yours and we can exchange tips! Lets get into it.

Types of Injuries

To write a realistic injury you NEED to know three things: A) What type of boo-boo B) What caused said boo-boo C) Where is the boo-boo D) Who will kiss boo-boo better (optional) edit: according to my friend D is not optional, so. find someone to kiss it better

Common types of injuries

I am by NO MEANS a professional so... take with a grain of salt. There are so many resources out there if you need to get specific but here's some simple shit xoxo:

Abrasion: Remember when you fell on the street as a skin and scrapped the shit out of your knee? Yeah. That. Its broken skin caused by friction against rough surfaces: requires IMMEDIATE cleaning.

Animal Chomps (bites): These can and will cause an infection if you don't treat it. Your 5'3 teenage girl CANNOT brush off that wolf bite apocalypse writers. Get her to the closest med tent.

Avulsion: A injury's caused when a body part is ripped away either partially or fully (HELLO SAW MOVIES). Results in some severe trauma (physically and mentally if they live) Typically caused by gunshot wounds, explosion's, car crashes etc.)

Bruise: Muscle fibers, blood vessels, and connective tissues are damaged with these bad boys. They cause that bluish purply look. Bruises do change colour to a yellow-green the older they are so do your research!

Burn: There are three degrees and a whole lot of different types for this mf and I can do a separate post on burns if you all want, but in general it is damage to the skin caused by heat, chemicals, radiation or sunlight (we all are too familiar with that last one). As some of know it can result in Swelling, Blistering, and scaring. Now if you gave your creature a really bad burn then it can cause shock, death and the destruction of the skin! And it leaves your victim of choice vulnerable to infection! Yay!!!

Fracture: a break in the bone, it literally looks fractured. It causes pain swelling, numbness and possibly deformity. You will likely need to send your character to the doctor.

Laceration: A cut, slice, tear in the skin, these are not stab wounds this is like if you accidentally cut yourself on glass or if someone swung at you with a knife and it sliced you, but it didn't go into your body and stay there. You get the idea.

Puncture wounds: THIS. THESE ARE YOUR STABS. Penetration to the skin caused by any sort of (usually sharp) object. These are the wounds your serial killer might use in the final moments of the kill with his knife, or the final blow to your hero's enemy with his sword.

Sprain: Ligaments (the things you see in x-rays that hold the bones together) that have been stretched or torn which happens when the joins move into unnatural positions. Usually, this results in stiffness, discoloration and swelling.

Strain: NOTE, Sprain and Strain ARE different. This is what happens when a muscle or tendon (not a ligament) is pulled, twisted or torn. Typically caused by over-stretching/contracting. Usually results in pain, muscle spams, and weakness.

Please note, that like I mentioned with burns there are degrees of severity for ALL OF THESE so please do your research this is just a starting point.

Care & Aftermath

LOTS of writers forget this part and its so sad. You want cute scenes between to characters who aren't yet dating but your rooting for? ONE OF THEM JUST GOT HURT AND THE OTHER IS TENDING TO IT. BAM INSTANT CUTE SCENE. Do not forget about your aftermath and medical care. Most injuries if left untreated WILL WORSEN if you leave them alone so FIX UP YOUR GUYS.

Do your research!! Look up the kind of injury your character sustained, the severity of it and you'll find recovery time and the kind of treatment they'll need.

In my experience, the more you focus on the aftermath of wounds, the more realistic it seems even if your dashing hero just got his arm ripped off by a dragon.

Writing the injury

You do not, now listen closely. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO WRITE A MEDICALLY ACCURATE DESCRIPTION OF THE WOUND. You're probably writing fiction and not a med student essay. If you are... email your professor I cannot help you here.

Just focus on getting the basics down. What's the bleeding? How bad is the swelling? What's the pain level at? and just leave the rest to the imagination. Unless your character is a doctor or whatever, your little dudes will also not know exactly what an Avulsion is. You can just say that there's a gaping hole or something. They'll be far to focused on the pain or whatever is causing it to diagnose themselves then and there.

Realism

I pinky promise you that as long as you have the basics, your readers will pick up what your laying down. The characters reaction is the most important part. How are they feeling emotionally? Are they having a physical reaction to the pain (Limping, shaking)? Do they have any physical response to the sight of their own/others blood? Do they experience shock? What's their attitude after it all?

These are the questions you should ask yourself. A war-hardened soilder will react differently to a gunshot wound than someone fresh out of high school.

Thanks :] go make the masses suffer :]]

[macgyvermedical]

This is a personal question, but I'm hoping you can give me some general answers. I fell down early last Thursday (15) morning and went to the ER where they told me I sprained my right knee and have torn ligaments from my hip to my ankle. They gave me nothing and told me to take otc pain relievers.

I was able to walk around without a lot of pain on Friday and Saturday, but on Sunday afternoon, it started to really hurt. It has gotten progressively worse since then and it's at a point where I can't even laugh without it hurting. The problem also is that it was my right leg that's messed up, but it's starting to be where I have pain radiating down from my left hip.

My questions are: I've been relying on Tylenol arthritis 650 mg (should also mention that I have arthritis), and am wondering how many of those I can safely take in a day? And do you think I should go back to the emergency room since it's getting worse?

I can't give you personal medical advice because I am not caring for you directly. If you are concerned or cannot manage pain go back to the hospital or call your primary care doctor.

Generally speaking, (not personal advice because again I do not know you):

You can take up to 4,000mg of acetaminophen in 24 hours (6 tablets of 650mg each). This is a very hard stop. You can also take 2,400mg of ibuprofen in 24 hours (12 tablets of 200mg each).

Acetaminophen and ibuprofen can be taken at the same time assuming you have no reason you otherwise can't take one of these (allergies to either medication, kidney or liver problems, stomach ulcers, etc...).

The acronym RICE, while not particularly good for actual healing, is great for pain control. Put as little weight as possible on the leg while it's healing, especially at first. Put ice in a ziploc bag (or use an ice pack) and wrap it in a towel, then hold against the painful part(s). Hold it there for 20 minutes, then let warm up for 20 minutes and repeat. Wrap anything swelling with an elastic bandage like an ACE wrap. Make sure you can easily get 2 fingers under the wrap and if your toes start to tingle or foot starts to swell loosen immediately. It might take a couple tries to get the right tightness. Elevate the knee above your heart as much as you can (lay on a couch or bed with your knee elevated on pillows).

Again this is NOT MEDICAL ADVICE. It's just general musculoskeletal pain control. If that isn't working, you should go back to the emergency department.

[meariluna]

I really wish I wouldn’t get told that a decision I make is wrong due to common beliefs that have not been deeply researched.

I recently went on a mostly fruit diet with no animal products because I want to heal my rosacea, which I discovered is linked to many autoimmune diseases, one of the most prevalent in my family is type 2 diabetes.

Upon doing research about skin problems and why they manifest, I came across information about the kidneys and poor filtration through the liver which leads to waste being taken out on the skin if your organs are not working together to remove the waste normally.

I did my research to understand what could work to finally heal my rosacea since it is so deeply misunderstood and judged. All my life I’ve been criticized because of it until I got older and stopped caring so much. But more than just aesthetic purposes, I want to heal my body from the inside out and it causes so much anger for me at times when I open up about these choices I’m making to better myself and I get told I’m not consuming enough protein or that I need to eat meat or eggs or whatever it may be that common media shares.

Our biology closely resembles frugivores, not carnivores. The only way we “safely” consume meat and animal products is by cooking, pasteurizing, or doing some sort of process to make it edible. That, to me, doesn’t make any sense. We get told to eat fruits and vegetables when we’re sick because they heal so wouldn’t it make sense to consume food we know to be healing most of the time?

How can we use it as medicine and then turn around and say “oh you can’t eat too much fruit because of the sugar” as if simple fruit sugar is equivalent to processed refined sugar… also, all our cells need sugar. Our body runs on glucose… which is sugar. Literally everything we consume gets transformed into glucose. Insulin gets released into the bloodstream to help transport glucose to our organs so we have energy and can function. So even foods that are low in sugar get turned into glucose… which again, is sugar. Processed sugar, like any processed food, is bad for you. It is not the same as eating raw fruit - the food the Earth created for us to consume. (Is it really that surprising that the food we can naturally consume is the most healing food for us? It’s almost as if our biology, which resembles frugivores in nature, is made for the consumptions of fruits. Amazing.)

This whole idea that protein is everything was not emphasized until the last 1000 years or so. Protein was not emphasized as the most important source of sustenance for all time. Fruits and vegetables were. There are entire cultures that thrive off of fruits and vegetables and do not struggle with the same level of disease as we do.

It’s so annoying that veganism or any sort of diet with a strong focus on fruits and vegetables gets criticized so much. I’m not pushing my choices on anyone and I wish their choices didn’t get pushed on me, especially coming from people who are currently struggling with health issues and are trying multiple protocols that are not working. It doesn’t make sense to take advice from someone else who is trying to figure it out and is not succeeding yet I’m being criticized personally for taking advice from sources who have healed themselves and others.

No one will know my body better than me. I have tried to get assistance from doctors and dermatologists. None of them have helped. Some have even made things worse by giving me medications that suppressed my symptoms for a few weeks only for them to come back stronger and then I got prescribed a more intense medication with tons of side effects. If I cannot trust in myself and intuitively listen to my body, then I will never heal. My body is my own. My choices are my own. Feel free to judge them when I am not around but keep your negativity to yourself. I’ve only being doing this for two days and I feel so much better, my digestion is better, and my rosacea is not flaring up. That cannot be a coincidence. Please stop listening to mass media and do your own research to heal your body and mind.

[ed-recovery-affirmations]

I recently received an ask containing some concerns the asker had about medical fatphobia. That ask is not posted, because the asker requested that it be answered privately, but I thought it was worth making a list of advice for those of you who are facing fatphobia and are trying to access medical care.

Some of you may feel too triggered, scared, or frustrated to speak up for yourselves when you feel your doctor isn't taking care of your needs. If you're concerned about your ability to do this throughout your appointment, consider bringing along a trusted individual who can serve as an advocate. A family member or friend might be able to do this for you if you have anybody you trust enough. Make a plan with this person beforehand, keeping your specific concerns and triggers in mind. Doctors may be more concerned about showing you respect if they're aware that their interactions with you are being observed.

If you've come in to be seen about a problem and you're concerned it's not related to your weight, but your doctor assumes that it is, try asking them what advice they would give to a thin patient who was struggling with the same symptoms.

Doctors may suggest weight loss as a first course of treatment, and assume that failure to lose weight means you haven't tried. This means you can wait and wait to get your problem addressed, only to have them refuse to address it at all. Some health problems cannot afford to wait that long. Get a second opinion. And if they refuse to pursue further testing, say you want it noted in your chart that your doctor chose not to test further.

I know it's so frustrating and triggering to go through the effort of getting an appointment, only to have your concerns dismissed. This piece of advice is going to be frustrating, because the last thing you'll feel like doing is attempting to speak with more doctors, but keep trying. The financial and emotional impact, not to mention the wasted time, may put you off medical services in the future, but you deserve a practitioner who takes you seriously.

If you feel triggered by being weighed, you can ask them not to weigh you, or not to tell you what your weight is.

Use your community! Ask other fat people who've had success getting real medical treatment how they found their doctor and what techniques they use in medical settings to ensure they get results. Ask them how they manage their triggers in medical settings. If you are diagnosed with a chronic health condition, seek advice from others who have the same condition. Learn what works for them, and how they got diagnosed.

You are not obligated to prioritize losing weight, but if you're fat, you might have better luck with your doctors if you offer a justification for that. Yes, that sucks and no, you shouldn't have to, but if you really need answers/support unrelated to weight loss issues, try saying "I am not prioritizing weight loss at this time. The issue I came in for is impacting my life more acutely just now, and I want to focus entirely on addressing that." (Again, if they insist on adding weight loss into the conversation, or if they refuse to test until weight loss has happened and not fixed the problem, find a different doctor.

Feel free to reblog and add on!

[frickfatphobes]

Any advice for how to accept your body and it's needs for someone who's gained a significant amount weight over the past decade and a half? I wasn't always as big as I am now, when I was 20 I was around 130-150lbs but around then I started taking a medication which has lead me to steadily gaining weight to the point I am now in my mid 30s at around 410lbs last time I went to the doctor. I've read up on fat liberation and it seems pretty clear to me that losing weight is unrealistic but sometimes it's just hard to accept that this is how big I am now. I look back at pictures from back in the day and remember how easy it was getting around, how I could spend all night out and never get tired. These days I can barely go grocery shopping without becoming exhausted. I've debated getting a mobility scooter but it just sounds so defeating but deep down I have a feeling it's what my body needs. I've tried light exercise and though it's improved my mobility some I still have some trouble getting around and still need to take breaks to sit down when walking longer distances.

Sorry if this is a lot I've just been thinking about this lately my bodies just gone through much change compared to when I was younger that I'm looking for some outside input.

No need to apologize. I love receiving asks like this and I'm happy to share my thoughts! Of course I'm no expert, but I'll do my best to provide good advice based on the information you provided here.

There are many challenges that come with accepting one's body, especially when it's more than just aesthetics that are affected by a person's size or weight. Fat liberation, as fantastic as it can be at healing someone emotionally or mentally, cannot change physical or mobility-related difficulties.

I've had an experience lately that reminded me that there are many fun things I used to love doing that I can't anymore, because the world refuses to become more inclusive to accommodate people like me. And you may think that your case isn't about inclusivity, but it might be somewhat related. Maybe you could still be able to spend a whole night out if you didn't have to waste your energy looking through a million places to find one that will accommodate you, or have large or comfortable enough seats, or don't force you to park super far away from the bar or club you want to visit.

And more importantly, you never should have been taught by media or parental figures or friends that using a mobility device means you're giving in to defeat. That is internalized ableism. Regardless of a person's weight, they should never feel weak or guilty for being accommodated for, even if they "don't really need it." (If it's preventing pain or exhaustion, it actually IS a necessity.)

Now, all that being said, I'm going to do my best to give you some advice based on what I've read here. Please remember that in the end, you know yourself and your body better than anyone else does, and if any of the advice feels wrong to you, then please take it with a grain of salt.

First, I think you should absolutely consider getting a mobility aid. You don't have to use it all the time, but if it will help prevent pain or exhaustion, it's worth looking into. You don't deserve to be tired or hurting all the time.

Second, if exercise helps you, keep finding ways to move that you enjoy and that feel good to you. The benefits of exercise cap out at around twenty minutes a day, and it doesn't even have to be consecutive. Don't ever push yourself past your limits or continue if you're in pain. Despite popular belief, exercise shouldn't hurt.

Third, keep looking into fat liberation. It has helped my mental health a ton. The best way to be happy with your body is realizing that there's nothing wrong with it as it is now, even if it often feels that way because of the constant bigotry around you. It sucks to get tired more quickly than you used to, but you can absolutely still live an amazingly fulfilling life without your body being the way it was.

Whatever you do, don't let anyone tell you that you aren't allowed to use a mobility aid or live happily in your body as it is. You deserve to feel joy without having to lose weight first.

I hope this helped at least a little bit, and I hope things get better for you.

[blue-phoria]

When you type out a full essay in reply to someone and at the end praise them for not flaming and blocking you immediately for having a conversation - Only to realise that while you were typing they blocked you and flamed you lol I don't want it to go to waste so I'll just put it below the cut v @milkshotalate @mxsickfuck Thought you might wanna give thoughts of it Cw - talk of exposure therapy - suibaiting at the end

"Exposure therapy should only be conducted by a professional under supervision and with extreme caution." Where are you getting this from that exposure therapy is dangerous unless under a medical professional? Sounds a bit gatekeepy for people who cannot afford or do not trust doctors to have their best interests in mind.

Might be just once example but I did it myself as a kid on my own, it sucked for half and hour, but after I was calm and could look at the image that scared me without fear.

"Just throwing yourself at something that makes you uncomfortable could go very, very wrong incredibly quickly." Meditation and Agere can also wrong for some, but well for others. Do you think that those also can only be done under the guidance of a doctor? "I agree that character creation is a great way to project intrusive thoughts in a healthy way, hell I do it, but purposefully consuming content that disgusts, disturbs or otherwise distresses you because you feel you somehow deserve it or need to feel disgusted again is NOT the move." Your last paragraph is spot on, don't go out of the way to find things that make you upset, I am completely on board with it. But at least in the spaces I am in "don't like don't read" is a proship talking point. Yet for antis it seems to be the opposite, they seem to want to find content they hate to disgust themselves and have someone to be angry at. I was in an encounter a while back where someone found my blog and was doomscrolling it and sharing it with their group chat, talking about how much they hated me and how they wanted to send me hate.

Sounds fun sign me up - I also hope the anon who came to you for advice, sees ur behaviour and decides not to trust you with their mental health anymore lol

[haruharuz]

Hey~ I just wanted to spread love, your blog is really helpful and I like the simplicity of it. Most people who tries to help others are more concerned about how “aesthetic” (God I hate this word) it has to be, rather than how USEFUL the content is. I read your post about saving money for important things, the way some women out there may spend their money into nails, fake lashes or wax because they’ve been told to be “high maintenance” to “treat themselves” or to “invest in themselves” that they cannot afford the basic needs like health care. (I am French by the way (sorry for my English) but here our system is pretty helpful to get access to healthcare (will it still be easy in the future? I don’t know, ask our dear Macron 🙄) but I know that in America for instance it is sooooo expensive!! Like how could you prioritize your lashes when your eyes are sick??) What I am trying to say is, thank you for pushing common sense onto people, I know that there is a lot of young girls out there (hiiii girlies you are so pretty never doubt that!! 💗) and they can be so easily influenced into buying more and more stupid stuff just to “glow up” (first of all most of them are literally high schoolers, let them GROW up before trying to push insecurities in their heads! They need to focus on their studies and on understanding themselves, not sleeping with tons of skincare and other practices because “going to bed ugly to wake up pretty”😬🙄😞!!!) If I may give an advice from my very little understanding of the world, if someone tries to give you advice by SELLING YOU STUFF, then perhaps you shouldn’t follow their advices. Listen to people who give you actual knowledge. To be honest if someone tells you to spend way too much money for products they’ve been PAID TO TALK ABOUT…

Anyway, I’ll stop ranting. I just want to say thank you, you are so amazingly strong and you give hope and great advices. Thank you so much and may God bless your soul💗💗💗

Angel~

Thank you so much for the ask my love!

Yes i totally agree. There's so much harmful advice. I used to be the type of woman that felt like i needed everything to be perfect just like that.

Over time though, as a dancer, i realized how toxic the mindset was. I started stocking my home with cheap (like store brand items) foods and such. I was more focused on helping me and a family member get further in life.

One time this happened, i had no choice. My weight fluctuated rapidly (and is again). I could have gone to get shots or whatever else to help but instead i chose to go to my doctor for nerve pain medication to help me there.

My skincare is so simple it isn't even funny lol