#I am also not excusing any of these fucks
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ੈ✩ cowboy ride or ring ? (smau) ੈ✩
pairing : max verstappen x norris! reader
summary: a move will test where the heart lies
tw : fluff, suggestive
fc : nailea devora
a/n : this was requested anonymously ! lysm 🫶🏻
·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・ ・゚·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚・・゚·:。・゚゚・ ✩ ・゚ ・゚·:。・゚゚
liked by norriz, max1, lilyhye and 74 others
wdcrider being a cowgirl for halloween because my riding skills have no complains
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chillijr why sing up for pornhub when the whole thing is right here
lordpercival you are going to get your account banned
wdcrider we will just do community service 💪🏻
max1 it’s meta not FIA
norriz CAN YOU LIKE NOT !?
norriz HOW ARE YOU AN INTROVERT !?
norriz MAx !? CONTROL YOUR FREAK
wdcrider how I feel knowing I am the only norris who gets to suck the verstappen dick
norriz AND I HAVE NO INTEREST IN HIM Y/N
norriz unless he lets me win the wdc, I don’t mind sucking
max1 ew
max1 you both are siblings fr
lilyhye but my girl is serving looks, SLAY MOMMY
wdcrider ITS SLAY COWGIRL
norizz ew, EW, eW, Ew
wdcrider telling mum about your 231 hookups
norizz EXCUSE ME !? I AM ALSO TELLING MUM
wdcrider about what? how I have one dick since like 4 years or that you can’t stay fixed on one ?
norriz HEY! I WAS COMMITED FEW TIMES
wdcrider ONLY TWICE, ONCE FOR LIKE A YEAR AND THE SECOND TIME FOR LIKE 3 MONTHS !?
norriz not my fault
wdcrider accept it, you don’t last with anyone for more than 5 days, surprised how you are with mclaren for so long
georgey calm down you two ratatouille rats, doesn’t lando’s recent situationship follow you ?
norriz fuck, bye , I don’t get married, it’s all on you dear sister
wdcrider well I am getting married because of you dear brother, so thank you 🤩
liked by norriz, lordoerceval, max1 and 103 others
wdcrider my man got me pink drink to show off my ring, what did yours do ?
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alexmieux mine didn’t get a FIA penalty 🤭
lilyhye mine crashed his car 😉
carvroom mine is obsessing over Lewis
rebecamour mine is jobless
chillijr I do have a seat at Williams.
wdcrider technically jobless
albono what do you mean all these years …?
colawithice yes alex, I am off to redbull
wdcrider I AM ADOPTING YOU COLAPINTO
colawithice MOMMY 🤓
max1 sorry, I am young to be a dad
wdcrider who asked you to be the dad?
colawithice mommy 😚
wdcrider it’s ok baby, you go beat him
liked by max1, lilyhye, chillijr and 64 others
wdcrider max said that he will only marry me if I finish my finals
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norriz great, you both are never marrying
norriz you pass any of your subjects and I am laying for your honeymoon
max1 well I am actually financially well off, so I can pay for it myself
wdcrider GO MY HUSBAND ! ! AND WAIT, LET HIM PAY
wdcrider I passed interior designing
norriz what bout the other 4 ?
wdcrider YOU SAID ANY
chillijr when is the wedding tho ?
wdcrider after yours and Rebecca
rebecamour 🤭🫶🏻
chillijr you really aren't getting married in this century
rebecamour the couch is waiting for you for the century
wdcrider blocked @ chillijr
wdcrider NO ONE TALKS TO MY WIFE LIKE THAT
wdcrider I WILL PUT A RING ON IT
rebecamour 😭🫶🏻
max1 return the one I gave then
wdcrider no refunds
liked by user1, ynverstappen, landonorris and 4,487,629 others
maxverstappen the one who gave me wings @ ynverstappen
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f1wags BREAKING ! FORMULA ONE WORLD CHAMPION MAX VERSTAPPEN IS MARRIED TO HIS LONG TIME GIRLFRIEND Y/N VERSTAPPEN. Currently no information is available as the couple seems to be very private about their relationship, the only picture which we could find of y/n is on alexandra mieux’s Instagram from 2021 when her account was private.
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user1 and I oop-
user2 well, that’s enough Instagram for today
user3 HELLOOO!?
user4 MAX YOU CANT DO THIS !?
user5 ITS LANDO'S SISTER !?
user6 oh god, the fights-
user7 MAX BAGGED THE NORRIS SISTER !?
user8 HOW IS MAX ALIVE ?
user9 Max may beat him in f1, but in life Lando will beat him up
user10 the amount of plot twists -
user11 now imagine saying Franco got the rebull seat
redbullracingf1 yes.
user11 BAHAHAH WHAT !?
user12 STOP, ENOUGH NEWS TO DIGEST FOR A DAY
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 headcanon#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#max verstappen#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen drabble#max verstappen headcanon#max verstappen one shot#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen smau#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x hamilton reader#f1 fanfic#f1 fic#f1 texts
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Hidden (Kim Mingyu X AFAB!Reader)
Description: angst. You get in a fight with Mingyu :,)
Warnings: slight cussing.
(Haha, not me writing after years of inactivity 😂😭, enjoyyy. Also, this is not revised, so excuse any grammar errors)
It wasn't that you were jealous, not even insecure... it was envy. There you were, sat in the loneliness of your bedroom, tapping through the private Instagram stories of your boyfriend at yet another function. His friends sat at a large table, enjoying their time with him. Time you were missing out on. Time that could have been yours, too.
With a dejected sigh, you drop your phone on your bed and get ready to hop in the shower. The stories had been posted 2 hours earlier, so it came as no surprise to hear the front door of your apartment open and close followed by your boyfriend's heavy footsteps coming in the direction of your bedroom.
You quickly busied yourself looking through your closet for your pajamas until you finally heard him enter. He smelled faintly of alcohol as his warm hands came in contact with your hips from behind. "Hi princess"
"Hey" your response was curt and cold and you knew you were being petty, but there was not a single fiber in you telling you be nice.
He noticed. He always did when you were upset. A sigh left his lips, and he stepped back, allowing you out of his hold. "What did I do now?"
You gave him a quick glance. He was now sitting at the edge of your bed watching you closely, like a math problem he was in a hurry to solve. "Nothing. I'm just tired" he could continue trying to solve it for all you cared.
If only Mingyu were the type to back down.
"Clearly not just 'nothing'" he insisted. "You're upset at me."
"I'm not doing this right now."
"If you don't want to fight, then at least do a good job of acting like everything is ok." now he was upset too. A small part of you wanted to blame yourself for doing this again, but the bigger part of you was hurt and felt left out. Things that a girlfriend should not feel about her boyfriend.
"Where were you tonight?" You finally met eyes with him only to have him roll his at you.
"Seriously?"
"That doesn't answer my question" you insisted.
"I went to have drinks with some friends, it's my day off." He finally conceded. "I didn't invite you because I thought you'd be busy-"
You can't help the scoff that leaves your lips, "bullshit" you interrupt. "Bullshit, Mingyu. You know my schedule. You knew I took today off- shit, I took today off for you and not one single call from you? Not even lunch?"
"Babe, it was a party for Lisa, and we all know you two don't really-"
"Holy shit, that's the excuse you're going with? That it was a party organized for Lisa, who I don't really talk to? At least fucking try to make sense, Kim Mingyu." You had said you weren't insecure, but you started to realize slowly that maybe you were insecure. This had never been an issue to you before Mingyu, you had never felt less than, you had never felt...
Hidden.
"Y/N I was just trying to save you an awkward time-"
Your eyes locked into his guilty black ones immediately, and as if by instinct you knew. "Mingyu, do they know about us?"
He stopped whatever bullshit excuse he was giving you, lips parted and eyes tearing away from your gaze immediately.
You hadn't been together for too long, but definitely long enough for his friends to know, surely. You had told all your friends by the time you'd been dating for 3 months, it would make absolutely no sense for him not to tell his friends after being together for 5 months... right?
"You know my friends know-"
You dropped the clothes in your hands and stomped up to him, shaking your head furious, "No, I know your members know. But what about your friends? Do they know that we're dating? Or am I correct in assuming that you are hiding me?"
You were met by silence. He avoided your gaze and stood from the bed turning his back on you, a hand tangled in his hair. "This is not how I thought tonight would go. I can't believe you're doing this right now."
"You're embarrassed of me?" You didn't mean for your voice to tremble the way it did. You hadn't even realized that your eyes were threatening to spill frustrated tears down your cheeks.
Your boyfriend flinched at the sound of your voice, but he didn't have the courage to face you. "Y/N..."
"Is it because I don't look like one of your super model friends?" You ask, "Or is it because I spend 40 hours a week holed up in an office? Or maybe because I live in an apartment that's the size of your walk in closet?"
He turns to look at you defeated, "Baby no-"
But it's too late. The seed of insecurity within you has germinated, it's grown roots, and they're spreading and wrapping around you at the speed of light. You can no longer keep eye contact with him. In an attempt to hide your tears, you pick up the clothes you'd dropped and start walking past him in direction of your bathroom.
His large hand grabs at your arm softly, "Y/N, please, let's not do this."
"I think you should go home. I have work in the morning." With a soft tug of your arm, his hand drops, and you lock yourself away in your bathroom, pressing a wrist to your lips, hoping that's enough to hide the choked sobs you'd been suppressing for weeks.
#svt mingyu#seventeen au#seventeen angst#seventeen#svt#seventeen fanfiction#seventeen reactions#kim mingyu#seventeen mingyu#mingyu au#boyfriend mingyu#mingyu one shot
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really feel like gortash and ascended astarion wouldn’t get along to comical amounts. like especially with how i write everything where durge accepts bhaal and succeeds in his plans w gortash.
gortash and kaidos planning every awful expansion of their empire out to the minute details. theyve been working at this for years, and finally they see the fruits of their labour and they so deserve these seats they’ve muscled their way into.
and then here comes ascended astarion waltzing into their halls as if he owns them. as if everyone should be kneeling and be so grateful they get to be in his presence. gortash isn’t at all intimidated by it; he’s seen every act and trick there is to play amongst aristocracy. sure a vampire ascendant is physically very strong, but where are his connections? the wealth he earned all on his own? a well established reputation? appearances are everything in the upper-city, after all.
and then to hear this vampire talk to his dearest assassin in that tone. talking down to his equal as if he was somehow better than him. gortash wouldn’t stop it in the moment because he doesn’t want to make kaidos seem like someone who can’t fight his own battles, but he does ask about it when they’re alone. why do you let him talk to you that way? he has no right to. gortash is also a very petty man, and so whenever astarion addresses him personally, he will use the same condescending tone in response. nobody is undermining gortash in his own halls.
for a vampire ascendant who has only had this rush of power for a matter of months to act this way in front of a man who has spent the last 40ish years dragging himself to the spot he is in now. nobody ever gifted gortash any power - there was no ritual he could ever override. no, he had to fight, scheme and crawl his way up. he deserves to be sat in these halls. gortash is only tolerating his presence because kaidos insists he can be useful. there is information a vampire can get a lot easier than a group of banite soldiers can. the looks gortash gives this ascendant vampire let him know that he is only staying his hand because his beloved wants him to.
#this got WAY too long#and yes I am very aware of how non canon and self indulgent this all is#I am also not tagging this properly because I enjoy everything I do staying in the little delusional gortash girly corner#it’s also important to know that the durge runs i use as a base for my fics had everything pick their ‘get worse’ options#because Kaidos isn’t going down alone#I am also not excusing any of these fucks#they are all evil and delusional and I find it easier to write stuff out from their awful deluded POVs#just in case the last paragraph sounds like I’m an apologist No Enver is awful!!!
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If all Wens were actually evil, Jiang Cheng would have been dead.
#and he still paraded his blind hatred#he still seeked to kill the same people who saved his life in more ways then one#jc i want to see him in a good light but he doesn't give me any reason to#wn snd wq sheltered them taking a big risk#also wn brought back zidian as well#jc has no excuse he hated wn way before the death of jzuan#that purple grape is bitter sour and acidic#and that's that#thinking about wen remnants death again and i am feeling hell lot of emotions#fuck the cultivation world#jc didn't even take a stand for them when he very well knew he could#canon jiang cheng#canon jc#wen ning#wen qing#wen remnants#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#mxtx#mo xiang tong xiu
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Bernie Sanders finally made a statement, on Nov. 4, calling for a "pause" in the bombing. People in the replies are saying "better late than never!" and I don't even know where to start.
The genocide has been going on for almost a month. Over 9,000 men, women, and children have been murdered. Thousands more have been wounded. Members of press and healthcare and their families have been deliberately targeted and assassinated. Israel has been murdering civilians en masse with impunity for weeks, both lying about it and blatantly admitting to it. 100+ Palestinians have been murdered in the West Bank due to settler terrorism backed by the Israeli army.
In an interview, Dr. Ofer Cassif, the Knesset member who was suspended for calling for an end to Israeli violence against Palestinians, revealed that he'd reached out to Bernie months prior to Oct. 7th because of the pogroms being carried out by Israelis against Palestinians which he said would result with an "explosion [of violence]", but received no response.
what the fuck do you mean "better late than never". what the fuck do you mean? the genocide is still ongoing, and, just like Blinken, Biden, and every complicit ghoul, he's calling for a pause. not a ceasefire. a ceasefire is just the start of what needs to happen. but he hasn't even called for that.
"better late than never" what gives you the fucking right to say that? tell that to the 10,000 people who the U.S. and its allies allowed Israel to murder. tell that to the thousands of wounded. tell that to the thousands who have been displaced. tell that to the people of Gaza who have been without food, water, and fuel for WEEKS. tell that to the Palestinians in the West Bank who are being murdered at the hands of settler terrorists. tell that to the Palestinians who were abducted and tortured and released with blue bands around their ankles. tell that to the Palestinians in occupied Palestine who can't reach their families and friends. tell that to Palestinians in diaspora who have seen their families, their friends, their people slaughtered with the full backing and support of the vast majority of western governments and media.
"better late than never" no, it's not good enough. IT'S NOT. there are SO many people around the world - both citizens and members of government - who recognized the injustice for what it was the DAY the bombing started. we owe the Palestinian people so much more than that. "better late than never" the ONLY thing that could POSSIBLY begin to even "make up" for the horrors and injustices inflicted upon the Palestinian people for almost a century is to end the genocide, end the occupation, end the apartheid, end settler colonialism, and dismantle the colonial state. Palestinians deserve NO LESS than total emancipation. Complete liberation. until then, it is not and will never be enough.
#sorry for spiel i just. got so mad. 'better late than never' DO YOU SEE ANY PALESTINIANS SAYING THAT? I WONDER WHY!#also the idea that we can just 'forgive and forget' if a ceasefire is called is insane and out of the question.#there is NO going back to 'business as usual'. we CANNOT and should not expect things to 'how they were before'.#god. i just. USELESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#also this is not like a total endorsement of cassif idk much about him im adding him in as a means to point to bernie's complicity#as far as im concerned bernie is just as complicit as everyone else.#if you are a bernie fan do NOT @ me i am NOT going to debate on this.#im sure hes not all evil nto all bad but it doesnt MATTER. he is COMPLICIT and that will not change. not for the rest of his LIFE.#people like tlaib and c. bush knew what was what within the first days of the bombing. theres no fucking excuse for his inaction!#AND I SAY ALL OF THIS AS SOMEONE WHO LIKED BERNIE.#📁.zip
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id like to thank ninjago episode snake jaguar for everything but nothing all at the same time
#alek art#lego ninjago#ninjago#sensei wu#ninjago wu#zane julien#previous master of ice mention#2024#(going to do this everytime) FOR CONTEXT : dr juliens 1st death and garms banishment took place in a similar time frame#so wu wouldve been young when he met zane for the first time#also i am very aware zane is ooc here ! prior to getting his powers and them actually settling in his body and mind.. he was a bit of a#jackass in my eyes. we see bits and pieces of zane snark in the series itself BUT like. dr julien described zane as acting different post#getting his powers. and we know elemental powers can mess with how someone behaves. kai being a hot head... so yeah#really wise whimsical old man stuck in the body of a 19 year old#VERSUS#egocentric grown ass man with no friends who lives in the woods and is a robot#they become friends. zane calls wu 'kid' every sentence#i forgot that wu doesnt visit zane often in canon. uhhh basically in my version bc avg zane fan thing to change canon: wu goes to dr julien#house and sees zane. he knew ice had 'gifted' zane his powers and how that could really fuck up a person. he shows up everyday for a week o#two and him and zane talk while zane swims or cuts wood or whatever. wu says their house is in the way of his walking path as an excuse#eventually wu stops showing up and dr julien passes and life goes on as we see them in canon#does rhat make any sense at all ? probably not i have a horrific headache#uhh at the time of writing this we are on s7 (on rewatch) so if anything changes ill lyk . lolsies#ask me about them please
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me: hmm i think i will headcanon orym as having ocd and ocpd, he reminds me of myself and my friends who struggle with compulsions and routines we have troubles breaking out of
liam o’brien choosing to portray the most upsetting yet accurate depiction of someone with untreated unmedicated undiagnosed moral purity ocd by sheer accident:
#🍃#critical role#critrole#orym of the air ashari#i know i bring up ocd orym all the time but wow last night's ep cinched it for me that he has a serious problem#like i got jumpscared by him being willfully dense to dorian after showing such kindness to laudna for the past couple episodes#and then it hit me like Oh. That’s a compulsion. That’s Orym of the Air Ashari having a compulsion.#hate that i have to say this but i am NOT excusing his actions in this episode or any other with this post#you can check my blog and i have no sympathies for him being scummy to dorian#also to anyone who wants orym to suffer or be punished for his actions: Well He’s About To Be!#bro’s about to have vasselheim fuck him over and make him feel triple as small and i am not looking forward to watching him break
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son boy raccoon trash can man suffering in a dnd au as a cleric bc his warlock will not stop committing murders and he has to keep coming up with reasons murder is valid to convince the gm its fine and under control
#my characters#oops i fell in love#right is trying his best in the au to think about all the logic behind killing someone despite being a cleric SPECIFICALLY#bc he refuses to hurt anyone irl or in dnd and ok fine their warlock can have a little murder as a treat#and the body count is adding up and hes like ... so tired..... please can you not kill for five minutes im running out of excuses#fwiw he has the weird logic of the group in the base plot and the guy who is the gm here#is v open about ok but if we ask right then hell give an unhinged answer completely thought out and rationalized#and in fact asks him hey i know you refuse to hurt people but im having a debate with these two coworkers#if you had to commit a crime for aaaaaanyone on the planet who would you commit a crime for#and he doesnt even hesitate to say luca obviously to which the asker is like WHAT ABOUT MY DAUGHTER#YOU WANNA MARRY HER AND WONT COMMIT A CRIME FOR HER? but LUCA? of all people???? not even brent?#and right is just so confused because first off brent would probably be the one committing a crime for him without being forced#(brent agrees with this statement with a shrug) and second off luca has really weird coworkers and thought he was getting stalked for a bit#due to a misunderstanding with said one weird coworker so yeah obviously right would threaten the guy with a gun which is illegal and#third and final how could he face his beloved angel (the daughter mentioned above) if he was a criminal#he cant tarnish a sweet little innocent girls opinion by committing a crime IN HER NAME gosh fuck off with that attitude#he has STANDARDS thank you very much#and the three at the table are all like okay yeah that was really thought out on the fly youre right#also brent do not commit any crimes for him please and brent just nods in agreement bc ok he wont commit a crime unprompted#also hi animal crossing emotes are so fun to doodle for bye#once again i am baffled by how different the colors look on my laptop in the art program vs posting to tumblr#im going to go insane at how different they look#IM COLOR PICKING FOR MY OWN OCS AND ITS SO WRONG LOOKING IDK MAN
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"Madam Yu would be a Karen/ treat minimum wage employees like shit-" literally the only servant she's shown abusing is Wei Wuxian (and that's because he's the victim of a proxy war between her and Jiang Fengmian around the idea of him being adopted into the family, not because of his class). Madam Yu's two handmaid's love and respect her, and Madam Yu actually defends them when Wang Lingjiao tries being a Karen to them. She also tells Wang Lingjiao to fuck off when she demands the Jiang servants bring her tea.
Also, Karens are unpleasant women, but not all unpleasant women are Karens. That term is about entitlement and being unreasonable (and often times, racist). Madam Yu is mean and unpleasant to talk to, but she keeps most of her interactions brief and probably doesn't have the time or mental energy to be a Karen or hold a grudge that long. If you want an actual example of a Karen in mdzs, Wang Lingjiao is right there
#mdzs#mo dao zu shi#grand master of demonic cultivation#for those confused on who I'm arguing against- this is about comments left on the “who'd be more insufferable online” tournament#I'll stop writing Madam Yu defense posts when y'all start actually looking at how she's described in the books#you guys just parrot and amplify the same “woman mean” narrative about her and its frustrating#I'm convinced most of you dont even read what she says or know she has motivations#and because i get at least one person going “so you're excusing child abuse” every time I talk about her-#No. I am not defending or excusing any of the bs she's actually done in canon#child abuse bad. theres just a lot of misinformation out there on what that abuse actually entailed#1 or 2 lashes that do not break the skin + shit talking and kneeling is a different punishment from whipping someone till they can't move#the former was her usual interaction with wwx. the later was an act to get the wens to fuck off#also can you guys please acknowledge the fact she was incredibly angry and on edge in canon because a war was about to start#and her kids and clan (but especially her kids) were being put in active danger#and that her ranting sessions happened around her family and she was venting#and that she's shown being cordial to unrelated people#she's a well respected figure. that wouldn't happen if she was a karen#and if we're looking at a modern au where there isnt a war happening she probably wouldnt be as on edge
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What I've been asking for a while now!! You all love watching animes and reading and watching stuff with such themes but can't seem to understand it now that it's really happening.
Given how obsessed western media and Israel were with the "bUt h@m@s" narrative this time, it makes it plenty obvious that ham@s is no longer the t€rr0r1st body that Israel once empowered and enabled it to be. It's just people/freedom fighters wanting their land back after they've experienced decades of similar barbarity it appears.
And how anyone thinks Palestinian people will come out of the current massacre, mass murder and cruelty all chill and cool is beyond me. Do you seriously expect they won't want to avenge their loved ones after the stuff Israel did to their families??? The school year in Gaza had to be ended because all kids were DEAD. Entireeee family lines have been wiped out. Their hospitals, refugee camps, bakeries, schools everything has been turned to dust. Their internet and phones were cut off while aid was refused entry and all of this is stuff you can read without crying, and feeling sick I haven't listed the stomach turning shit yet.
Oh btw are you all still seriously believing that Israel is out there doing you a favour by t@rgEt1ng h@m@s? They're just killing and slaughtering and destroying so they can expand their colonized land later (this has been said by Israeli politicians and people). Also, they don't care about hostages from their country so before demanding their release from h@mas, talk to Israel.
And what happens when they're done getting rid of h@m@s which I know they're not doing that but still? Palestinians will thank them and carry on with their lives? What have you all been encouraging and celebrating Ukrainians for? Why doesn't that same logic apply here? You don't expect one ounce self-defence from Palestine later??? After alllll that was done?? Get your brain checked.
#i am so so done#all the pro israel axcounts that interacted with my posts recently are still using h@m@s and ant1 semiti$m#that's all they say nothing else#idk how blind and unaware one can be at this point#it really doesn't take any effort anymore to see what Israel is doing#they love usinf h@m@s in the news coz you all buy it readilu#just like how germany bought whatever h1tler#just like you all bought what bush and tony blair said about the iraq and afghan war#you all have no excuse given the abundance of evidemce out there#also how do you all propose Palestinians go on from here?#what has you stance been on Ukraine?#gosh i am so frustrated idk what to write to make people understand#palestine#free palestine#gaza#free gaza#gaza strip#middle east#israel#fuck israel#ukraine#russia
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I started drawing this as soon as I got my phone, WHAT THE FUCK
#SO SCARY#excuse my handwriting i am in SHOCK#also ignore any other shoddy craftwork i did this in like. 20 minutes in the car immediately after seeing this kid#what a fucking enigma and i don't even know if he knows who dream is cause he was like 10#art#my art#artists on Tumblr#dream
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*he spilled my cup of paint water all over everything idk why I said he spilled watercolors I just woke up girls
I literally walked away for two minutes tops to make coffee and came back to his ass sitting on this water color palette and my painting open after spilling my watercolor water all over it
Look at that face. He knows he did something wrong hahahha
#I really wish I had a pic of him just sitting on the watercolors bc it was hilarious#like he looked so innocent and cute and I just knew his was was covered in various colors hashahwhwha#but i was more concerned with the toxicity so my immediate reaction was to try to clean his paws the best I could#and research#it won’t cause any skin or gastrointestinal issues so we’re good thankfully#he will be fine don’t worry lmao it’s water based watercolors#gonna watch him close just in case#grabbed him asap and a wash cloth and took him to the sink#but yes to reiterate it’s NOT TOXIC AND HE IS FINE I PROMISE#also thank goodness I grabbed him immediately before he started prancing around on the white carpet bc I would be yelled at for weeks#u have four bloody scratches on my face but there are not rainbow foot prints all over the house and he is safe so I am fine with that#i**#they’re ^#the way cats attack you and think they’re being punished when you’re literally potentially trying to just save their life#or help them#like unhooking their claw from somethin their stuck too#and like I give a fuck about clothes as much as my cat but there’s paint all over my favorite robe too now hahah#legit thiught the red streaks on my face were watercolor hahahaha so I was like oh shit that blood#I’m not mad#after I found out it wasn’t toxic and that he didn’t step all over the wet carpets and that he was okay i laughed for like 15 minutes#I’m still laughing like… y’all ☠️#please excuse my voice I’m a little sick and I sound like a southerner ew#like why do i sound like someone’s Christian Baptist mother offering someone cookies#Queso#my cats#lmao
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Oh I do not like that two of my ships right now has someone that's deeply oppressed on a systematic level in their story having to set aside their own morals and values for their extremely privileged lover who does not bother to truly understand their pain, often trying to make excuses for the oppressors.
#jayjon#caitvi#LOOK IT'S DEEPLY PERSONAL TO ME#I am very privileged on many fronts but also not#i don't like white people#people are trying to justify caitlyn rn#if it looks like a cop and talks like a cop it's a COP#she didn't need to go this far#she didn't need to fucking poison the air the people of zaun breathe#she didn't need to be so brutal- that was a choice#and none of this got her any closer to jinx#Jinx fucking lured her in#HER GIRLFRIEND WHO SHE SHOULD LOVE IS ZAUN#Idc if cait was raised with these kind of thoughts#i'm allowed to be mad at the fascist in the making idc idc#Vi suffered SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE OF ENFORCERS#enforcers killed her parents- they put her in prison for practically all of her childhood#Mel lost her home-her mother is actively conspiring against her- she lost her brother- and yet she KNOWS when it's too far#cassandra gave her the damn key hoping cait would be better#she sure as fuck is totally respecting her mom right by using the thing she made to POISON PEOPLE#'she's grieving- she's depressed'- she's calling people animals i don't think she was too far from this kinda mentality#like why is it such a steep slide for her?#her environment shaped her yeah but that's an explanation- not an excuse to go easy on her#again- MEL MEDARDA#also jon asking jay to fucking go easy on Nia when she COLONIZED HIS COUNTRY SHUT THE FUCK UP
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FINALLY I DRAW SOMETHING!!!!!!!
some Joseph, both young (around 1980 i'd say, when he was traveling w Stan a few years before the portal incident) and old (~2017, now an art teacher at Westchester High). i like to think the first one is a picture Stan took of him while they were traveling and the second one is his staff photo at WH. the more things change the more they stay the same. i might give em backgrounds and foregrounds to look like that
he's had that jacket since the 70s. real leather will last you.
no glasses alts + the first sketch below
#[holding him in my hands like a tiny baby bird]#idk if hes hiding something on his neck. he might be. those neck covers just happened. probably less embarrassing than Ford's tattoos thoug#also im not super interested in “what if Stan had a romance partner who helped him run the shack” type Stan/oc buuuuuuuut#unfortunately i am not immune to old man yaoi and have been thinking “ok BUT what if Jojo helped Stan run the shack” during this rewatch#i think theyre not super open about their relationship so Dipper & Mabel have no idea until the manotaur ep when Mabel realizes “woah......#“Grunkle Stan do you have a crush on Grunkle Jojo???”#[Joseph so called Grunkle Jojo bc “we've known each other long enough hes basically family”]#anyway Mabel tries to “fix Stan up” to help him ask him out & Jojo is fully aware its happening and says nothing bc Funny#they do tell her and Dipper at the end of the day bc since she went through all that trouble trying to set em up they should know#plus kids these days tend to be a lot nicer about gay people sometimes#also good: Jojo giving Stan A Look every time he's shitty or sexist but otherwise not caring about any other morally dubious/bad thing#like Jojo can excuse regular tax fraud/stealing/scamming people but he draws the line at almost getting Waddles eaten by a dinosaur#hes the worlds most “not my circus not my monkeys” moral compass#hes said that before. and Dipper points out that it IS his circus bc he helps run the shack#to which he responds “hah. yeah :)” bc he helps do the fraud and scams <3#fuck i have to draw that as a comic or fake screenshots or something#anyway im not planning on focusing on a Mr's Mysteries AU but i may talk about it occasionally#ANYWAY ANYWAY i wanna talk about him i love talking about him send some asks let me talk about him <3#oc: Joseph van Dyke
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Bought one of my lil nephew giannis shoes for his birthday bcs he loves giannis and these are some of the ugliest fucking things I have ever laid my eyes on in my life. anyways it's his bday today so i gave them to him. but they are so ugly. he loves them
#i am not a sneakerhead#i wish i could be . finacially i can be. but mentally i cannot#i am not a car guy either. i could. but i cant mentally#bcs the only time id get smthing pretty is to look at it. and keep it safe#and then id want to km$ for not using smthing thats intended to be used bcs i hate wasted potential#once i got these rlly nice shoes#ive worn them once when i was trying them on#and i hate myself every day for doing that but also i just cant get them dirty#BUT I HATE THAT#some ppl can do that. they get a million things and only use it once and yea i COULD but psychologically i just CANT#im friends with a lot of sneakerheads and chain wearers and while i cant mentally make myself one#i can understand why they can#like ppl always wanna excuse not helping ppl by pointing at the stuff they already have#like oh u can buy urself a chain but cant buy ur momma and u a nicer place to live#like ok so credit scores are not existent then. especially when ppl use that phrase against ppl growing into crime like#yes they are making money now but is it good clean money? no. thats not gonna go into smthing long term n hefty like a house#chains are a rlly big thing bcs sometimes some jewelers just dont ask questions. hence bmf's jeweler getting roped into their crime schemes#any business can be like that btw. like michael jacksons doctor getting paid to kill him. the difficulty lvl just changes#and also. random ppl make fun of the stuff they can see or hear right in front of them#random ppl can and will make u feel bad abt any little thing they know or see the best bcs theyre assholes like that#u wear shoes all the time everywhere. thats more and more eyes noticing how old/dirty ur shoes are#or ur cars old n busted or ur phones a fucking android like it doesnt matter. the more ppl can see. the more theyll know#the more sensitive u get abt whats actually small to u at the start but big 2 them n then it gets big 2 u#anyways yea so like. i get it. i dont do it but i can see why others do#anyways yea these shoes are so ugly lol like i dont buy merch of my favs unless the style matches mine personally#he just liked them bcs they were giannis tbh n then i pointed out they were modeled after 1 of the jerseys#which made he rlly want them a while back so i surprised him today#but yea these things are ugly lol im glad he likes them but ew LMFAO
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I didn’t mention it in the drawings but the cloaca is self lubricating with gentle stimulation and fingering, and the hole (without hemipenes in the way) is placed similarly to a vaginal entrance. My goal here was basically to create the most yonic phallus the world has ever seen
The slit of his cocks also is rather long and thin in comparison to a urethra, so the pre-cum (which is the same lubricant as in the cloaca) can more evenly distribute itself. I think his semen is also rather thin during ejaculation, but quickly gels and sticks to wherever it has ended up. Has some interesting implications for how the Female of his one-man species would function
Much like snakes his testes are internal and connected to the hemipenes, and all situated within the cloaca. So spreading his cocks apart from each other would probably stretch him open like fingering would. I imagine he also has a prostate or a similar internal erogenous zone since his genitals are so accepting of penetration. Almost like they were designed with that in mind…
Anyways I’m not very well-versed in biology (more of a math girlie) but luckily the intention isn’t to have 0 logical fuck ups i literally just designed the hottest and most attractive genitals i possibly could for my special little snake-man
#voldemort#fucked around with a 2 heads per cock thing but this is what I ended up settling on :-))#not based on any species of snake in particular#nor am I delusional enough to believe that this is in any way realistic#very much thinking with my dick here#drawing with my penis#if you will#lol#also excuse my bad handwriting it’s so hard to be legible on my iPad#my writing is much nicer on actual paper
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