#Heath's parents

[starlightshadowsworld]

Little cousin AU

Aka Heath Burns is canonically cousins with Jackson Jekyll and Holt Hyde.

And this is just a whole ass AU where their all just close and Heath being a protective older brother figure to them both.

Family backstories in this AU.

Heath's mother is Abigail Burns née Blake and his father is James Burns.

Jackson and Holt's mother is Cyra Jekyll née Blake and their fathers are Henry Jekyll and Edward Hyde.

Abigail and Cyra are sisters.

They are both fire elemental monsters.

The Blake sisters were infamous at Monster High when they attended.

Cyra was wicked smart, she was a spit fire who never took shit from no ghoul.

Abigail was a trickster, she was more mellow back than but she fought every fight to win.

Their parents were never around for either for them, so far caught up in their own lives they forgot they had children.

The Blake sisters were as thick as theives and they were trouble.

And trouble always has a way of finding trouble.

Henry Jekyll was a rather odd kid, a new student who was originally from Londoom.

He was a normie who had ancestry with monsters.

And had wanted to see if he could awaken his heritage.

... And he did a lot more than that.

Edward Hyde came into creation.

It took a time for the two to co-exist peacefully but from their they were inseparable.

Henry and Edward were both ostracised at Monster High.

Considered neither normie nor monster.

But made an unlikely friend in James Burns, head of the Casketball team.

Who had asked if Henry would be open to tutoring him as he was failing Clawculus.

Henry, reluctant but agreed and the two ended up becoming good friends.

James would continue to look out and talk to Henry, even turning on his own team when he found them bullying him.

Few people wanted to mess with the guy who's self proclaimed body guard was a powerful fire elemental and one of the best Casketball players in the school.

Edward was suspicious of James in the beginning but they too would become good friends.

James didn't gave any family, he was an orphan and the three of them were a lot like brothers.

So much so, James would tease Henry and Edward on their crush on Cyra Blake.

They were academic rivials, competing head to head for test scores and grades.

Little did the duo know Cyra had a crush on them.

Abigail ends up meeting up with James, knowing he's Henry and Edward's best friend and the two make plans to set their siblings up.

Their meddling proves to be successful, and in doing so they end up getting to know each other.

And falling for each other.

The group were close, becoming a family to each other and riding out on a high for the rest of their time at Monster High.

But things weren't the same after graduation.

James was kicked out of the orphanage once he turned 18.

Cyra and Abigail's parents had left them the house and moved to Sacris.

Henry and Edward were disowned from their normie family.

They saw Edward as unnatural, as a disgusting monster who had possessed their dear Henry.

Unable to accept that Henry and Edward were both good people, a human and a monster co-existing.

Abigail and Cyra bought their boyfriends to their house. Living together for the first few years after graduation while everyone tried to pick themselves up move on.

Cyra, Henry and Edward eventually moved out.

Abigail and James married.

And a few years later as did Cyra, Henry and Edward.

Henry was on track to be a doctor, Edward was a writer. Cyra was in university to become a lawyer.

Abigail became a lab technician and James was working as a chefs apprentice.

It could have all ended their, that could have been their happily ever after.

But tragedy struck years later.

The group were having a picnic at a local park. Henry was pushing Heath and Jackson on the swings.

Heath was around 5 and Jackson who was turning 4 soon.

Edward switched with Henry to push the kids.

However, a group of normies saw. People who were close to Henry's parents.

And had heard all about their rants and ravings to everyone who would listen that their beloved son Henry had been possessed by monsters.

And had followed them here, and we're only further angered seeing the normie looking Jackson "in his wicked clutches."

Edward was attacked by normies trying to "cleanse him" his friends jumped into help but it was an ambush.

By the time they were able to get to Edward, now Henry he was gone.

The normies cheered that they had freed him, before running off in terror at James, fully flamed out as a giant monster roaring and yelling.

They tried to get Henry to a hospital but it was too late.

Cyra was heartbroken, James never fully recovered losing his best friend. And it was Abigail who got everyone back home safely and took charge.

Arranging the funeral, encouraging her sister to move back in with them and holding both of their hands as they all mourned their beloved friends.

Heath, already protective over Jackson and Holt took it upon himself to look after and protect them. They were his cousins, his little brothers now.

Jackson doesn't remember the whole incident but he and Holt wouldn't leave Heaths side for a long time.

Only seperated when Heath headed to Monster High but joined him soon enough.

Unfortunately the normies involved were never charged and got off scot free.

Cyra moved across the street from her sister and James, though they have all remained close.

They all carry Henry and Edward's deaths and raised their kids as siblings more than cousins.

Heath remains a protective older brother and in time and with therapy Jackson and Holt were able to find their footing and shine.

[antisocialsharky]

Parents who Love their Kids Cause PDs too

The belief, that only parents who absolutely despise their kids, can cause said kids to develop a personality disorder, is a dangerous misconception.

This belief majorly stems from the facts, that:

1. People think parents who love their children do everything right & parents who hate their children do everything wrong and

2. People think, trauma can only be caused intentionally & maliciously.

Which is both bullshit btw! Let me tell you why:

1. Parents who "love" (however you define that) their children often tend to think that this love is:

• always visible and obvious to the child => therefore the child never has to question that they're loved

• a sign that everything they do is done in the name of said love => therefore no action/behavior can be wrong/abusive/bad because they didn't mean it maliciously, it was done out of love

• a reason that the child should/will forgive them for any wrongdoings and that the simple existence of this love is enough to make the child happy => therefore the child has no reason to feel unloved, no reason to complain and no reason to cut them off

Many parents do not realize, that they rely on their child automatically knowing of this emotions existence to such a degree, that they fail to verbally communicate it often enough, fail to make their actions show said love and fail to acknowledge that something done out of love, does not equal it being good or non harmful.

To give you a personal example here: My parents love me, absolutely! They'd lay down their life for mine in a heartbeat.

But when I was growing up, their actions did not always reflect that. I went years without hearing the words and whenever I tried to communicate, that I felt unloved, I only got to hear that I was being ridiculous. According to them I had food to eat, a roof over my head and two living parents that didn't beat me, so I should be happy.

They expected me to know that they provided these things for me out of love and that that should be enough to satisfy my emotional needs. It wasn't and it rarely is.

Loving your child is worth shit, if you don't make sure to remind your child of that love frequently. Its worth shit, if you fail to pay attention and fail to show up for this child. Love alone doesn't win you the "greatest parent" award.

Similarly, a lack of love, doesn't immediately mean that you're a horrible parent. You can not feel love for your children and still make decisions that are benefitial for those children. You can not feel love for them and still be a parent that doesn't ever raise their hands against them, which will make you "better" than many loving parents who do raise their hands against their kids. The emotional feelings towards your children do not determine your ability to be a good parent, at least not inherently.

There is nuance, when it comes to children needing to have their emotional needs met and being able to sense whether its genuine or not, but if someone is good at faking emotions, one could make their child feel loved, without ever personally feeling that love (=> arguments can be made about whether or not the child will be able to understand the goodwill behind the faking and will be able to value that the parent did that for their benefit, instead of being sad about there not being emotional love, but thats not the point of this post).

What I am trying to say is this:

• parents who love their children are capable of not meeting their childs emotional needs

• parents who love their children are capable of doing things that end up hurting their children

• parents who love their children are capable of being so caught up in chores, work, relationship problems, etc. that they accidentally neglect their children

• parents who love their children are capable of doing things, that they may see as "good", "character building", "helpful for later", etc. but which will do more damage than good

• parents who love their children are capable of pushing them away by being too controlling, too smothering and too invested

Being a parent isn't easy, but love alone is not the recipe for producing non traumatized well adjusted children. Thats all I wanna tell you right here. Theres always nuance and reasons why things may go wrong, but in the end love doesn't protect against that.

2. Trauma isn't always caused maliciously & intentionally. That much is probably already obvious from the previous paragraphs, but I'll get into it regardless.

If a parent works two jobs, has arguments with their partner at the side, needs to do most of the chores and has two children (one maybe at toddler age, the other a teenager), one (or both) of those children might end up experiencing accidental neglect. Theres only so much a human being can do & devote their time to and while you can set priorities, sometimes you will accidentally neglect a child, because you have no time to do their homework with them, you have no time to go to the park and play with them, you're too tired to listen to them babble on about their interests, you're too distracted to properly congratulate them about their good grades and you're not present enough to realize they're always alone and barely leave their room anymore. Maybe you fail to realize health concerns, conflicts with their friends, arguments between the kids, etc. All the while you're trying your hardest to provide for your children and balance your own life. Accidental neglect is a thing.

If a parent was brought up by an emotionally colder parent or an absent parent or a combination of that, they may have never learned how one properly cares for a childs emotional needs.

They may think they turned out fine, because they have a job, they have a house and a family, everything they're supposed to achieve, so why should they bring you up any differently than they were themselves? Maybe they even saw some youtube videos and facebook posts on how kids these days are all sensitive little things and can't manage their lifes anymore. Maybe the parent makes it their misguided mission to make sure their own kids are resilient and strong, just like they are, so they have a good chance of success and survival.

They don't tell the kids they love them. They don't comfort them when they're sad. They don't hug them. They don't allow big emotional tantrums. They harshly punish bad grades and mistakes, because if the kid is to succeed and survive, the parents needs to help it stay on the path. That parent loves their child and expresses this love in a misguided attempt at helping it succeed in life and be even better off than they were. Accidental/misguided emotional neglect (and abuse if u wanna call it that) is a thing.

I could go on about this for ages! Theres a million different situations in which parents try their hardest and best to give their kids a good life and help them succeed, but still have their children turn out traumatized.

Theres side factors like being marginalized, bullying, a lack of resources, other relatives being unhelpful/abusive, kids & parents being disabled in some way, etc.

All the love a parent holds for their child, cannot save the kid from being traumatized and it cannot save the kid from developing a personality disorder later in life.

If love (the emotion) is to be effective, it needs to be followed up by actions. Meeting a childs emotional/physical/developmental needs isn't done by holding a certain feeling for the child & especially not if you never make sure the child understands how you show & give that love to them.

By now, you might be thinking "Yeah okay sure, I suppose I already knew that much, but why are we talking about it this in the first place?"

Good question and theres multiple answers to it:

• Some parents will still not acknowledge that they have the capacity to hurt their kids. Many of them place more value in being labeled as/feeling like a "good parent" than they do in actually...producing a healthy well adjusted child. They believe themselves immune to causing their child trauma, simply based on "loving the child" and "providing food/shelter" and thats dangerous.

• Many people regularely get invalidated in personality disorder centered spaces, or also trauma spaces in general, if they have contact with their parents/have now build a healthy relationship with them, etc. Even other PDers/trauma survivors have not understood, that being loved by your parents doesn't equal a good childhood and doesn't mean that you can't be traumatized by them to the degree of developing a PD.

• Many professionals do not realize the amount of impact, that emotional neglect can have and often blame the patient for hiding in their room, being too hard on their parents, being sensitive, etc.

• Many PDers/trauma survivors also invalidate themselves because of this! They may think "was it really that bad if my parents loved me?" or "is it even valid/am I allowed to be hurt by it, if my parents didn't mean to do that?". Its challenging to hold space for both: the acknowledgement that they were loved & the pain wasn't caused intentionally, as well as their own valid feelings of having been/still being hurt by it.

• Additionally theres many people who worry that their muted emotions/difficulties developing actual bonds, may cause them to be bad parents, since they cannot love their children in the conventional way. For them it might be important to hear, that actions usually speak louder than the emotions they were motivated by and that loving your child doesn't equal being a good parent, so not loving it doesn't equal being a bad parent.

A few closing notes:

• "love" is used here in the "societal definiton" way, or more the way people seem to use it to mean "unconditional lovey dovey feelings towards one or more people". love, is of course deeply personal and for many already includes the actions one takes to show said love. I use the general idea of it here, since thats often the way parents kinda mean it when they say it (+/- the part of providing the survival essentials of shelter and food or other material things..yk for arguments sake)

• everyone has a different opinion on whether or not children can/should be brought up by people, who can't feel love for them and whether said people can meet the childrens emotional needs. I think that if ppl who do love their kids are sometimes not capable of meeting their childrens emotional needs, having or not having the capacity to love, seems to not be an inherent guarantee to excell or suck at meeting a kids needs. therefore theres no reason to think that every person with an incapacity for emotional love will suck at meeting someones emotional needs. I mean its the same as with empathy, having a lack of that doesn't make you inherently suck at comforting people or being a good friend now, does it? its always individual.

• in the place of every "parent", you can of course put "caregiver" or whichever word fits your situation! its easier to just do the arguments with parents here, but it does of course extend to any person who takes care of a child.

• this is also not meant to be a post, that tells parents they always suck, or tell them that their love is worthless or whatever. you can see it more as a reminder, that love alone isn't enough if its just what you feel for someone. I mean...no romantic or platonic relationship will work well if you just love your partner/friend and pay rent and maybe cook a meal here and there. partners/friends have emotional & physical needs they need met and so do children. an emotion alone doesn't do that and especially not if you assume that its always known how you feel! children are individuals that have & understand different love languages and being a parent doesn't inherently mean you know what your child needs. you gotta actually ask it and interact with it in order to get to know your child and then act on that knowledge.

first posted on my instagram (same @)

[miss-americana-reputation]

love her madly

patrick verona x reader

warnings- smut 18+, fluff, oral (m receiving), daddy kink, spitting, name calling aka degrading, dacryphilia

inspired by love her madly- the doors

—————————————————————

“i got it.” i call out as patrick knocks on the door. “hi.” i smile and open it to see him smiling there. “hey.” he smiles back, softly kissing the side of my lips. “you’re early.” i point out, inviting him in. “wanna make a good impression.” he responds.

“okay, dad.” i call out, pulling him deeper into the house. i drag him into the living room to where my dad sits, watching tv. “yeah- oh.” he says, looking at us.

“this is patrick, my boyfriend.” i smile. “nice to meet you, sir.” he reaches to shake his hand. my dad shakes it and looks him up and down before letting go.

eventually i pull him away and into the kitchen where my mom is finishing up. “who’s this?” my mom smiles. “patrick, my boyfriend.” i introduce him. “nice to meet you patrick.” she smiles. “nice to meet you too, ma’am.” he smiles.

“dear.” she changes her attention to you. “hm?” i hum. “remember, we gonna have to cut dinner a bit short. the patterson’s invited me and your dad to a cocktail party.” she explains. “got it. i’ll clean up.” i softly smile. “perfect,” she says, wiping off her hands, “go make the table while i finish up.” she smiles.

i nod and pull out plates and silverware, handing the plates to patrick. we set down plates and cups. “wanna go get my dad?” i whisper to him as i follow behind him with silverware while he sets cups down. “i think he wants to kill me.” he whispers back. “i’ll go.” he sighs as he finishes and i smile as he leaves.

i help bring the dishes to the table as they come into the kitchen.

eventually we all get situated and we start eating. “food’s lovely, ma’am.” patrick smiles at my mom. “thank you.” she responds. “so any plans for after graduation?” my dad asks. “i’m planning on working at the music store at main street.” he smiles.

“oh isn’t that nice. been meaning to check that one out.” my mom smiles. we continue to eat for a moment, i softly take his hand under the table. i squeeze it one time for a check in, and he squeezes it back once to say he’s okay.

“so you do anything outside of school?” my dad asks. “yeah, i like to fix up cars, but your daughter seems to take up a lot of my time.” he answers, trying to get a laugh out of my dad. “oh. a future mechanic, huh.” he nods before eating.

dinner went by painfully awkward, eventually my mom and dad freshen up for the party and we finished eating then cleaning up.

“i think he hates me.” he sighs, carrying the last of the dishes to the sink. “he just needs to warm up to you.” i respond, washing off the plates. “do i smell like cigarettes? knew i should’ve not smoked today.” he asks.

“you’re fine, most dads don’t like their daughter dating people.” i smile. “hm. he thinks i’m a failure.” he sighs. “he doesn’t, i promise. he’s just tough.” i smile.

“okay, we’re heading out.” my mom walks into the kitchen. “okay.” i smile. “see you tomorrow. it was nice to meet you patrick.” my mom smiles. they leave as i finish up.

“okay.” i smile. he immediately presses his lips onto mine, lightly shoving me into the counter. “oh.” i hum against him. “sorry, i’ve been holding back all night.” he pants. i smile against him and pull him back.

he sneaks his hands down to my ass and he gropes them while he slips his tongue into my mouth, his easily winning dominance.

“pat.” i pant out. “hm?” he hums, moving down to my neck. “wanna go- fuck- upstairs.” i say. “okay.” he smiles. we move upstairs, stealing kisses and he slaps my ass a couple of times.

we reach my room and i pull him inside, quickly shutting and locking the door behind us. he pulls me on top of him on my bed. he connects our lips and it’s heated, clashing teeth and tongues fighting for dominance, which he quickly wins.

“please.” i moan, sneaking my hand down between us and palming him. his hand grabs mine and he flips us over. “did i say you could?” he spits. “sorry.” i apologize. “naughty girl.” he says.

he moves so he’s standing and i’m laying on the bed. “come on. kneel.” he demands. i follow his commands and kneel before him. “can i?” i ask, motioning to his fly.

“yeah.” he nods. i undo his belt and unzip his fly, then pull down his pants just a little bit. he helps me and pulls down his black boxers. his member pops out, slapping against his stomach. “shit.” he sighs, stroking himself.

“please.” i whine. “what do you want?” he asks. “fuck my mouth.” i swap his hand with mine and slowly stroke him. “yeah? want to have you throat fucked?” he smiles and i nod.

i take him in my mouth and he slowly thrusts into my mouth. “shit.” he takes my hair in his hands and uses it as leverage. i moan against him and he tightens his hand. “didn’t anyone teach you to not speak with a full mouth?” he taunts.

he continues to use me while i look up at him. “fucking slut.” he groans. i squeeze my thighs together for a bit of friction. “fucking pathetic.” he lowly laughs.

“wanna tell me who’s your real daddy?” he slows down. he pulls out and i catch my breath. “y-you. you’re my real daddy.” i look up at him, with pure submission in my eyes.

“good little slut.” he says, snapping his cock back into my mouth. “jesus.” he groans as i play with his balls. he continues to thrust into my mouth so i gag around him.

he uses my mouth like i mean nothing to him. i squeeze my hips together even more, trying to cause some friction. “look at you.” he smirks at my thighs. that just fuels him as he continues to fuck me.

i moan against him and he lets out a loud groan. i meet his eyes as i feel drool slip out from the corners of my mouth. he continues to fuck me and some tears fall down my face.

“aw. pretty baby is crying? you look so pathetic. choking on daddy’s dick.” he taunts. “shit.” he sucks in a sharp breath. “getting close baby.” he warns.

his hips become sloppy as he gets closer and closer. “oh fuck.” he sighs. “you’re treating me so well.” he praises. i let him fuck me as he eventually pulls out.

he finishes himself by stroking his cock and his seed goes all over my face. “shit, fuck.” he sighs as he finishes. he calms down and softly taps his cock against my head.

“here.” he says and quick runs to my bathroom. he comes back with a towel and helps me clean up. “you look so pretty.” he smiles as i finish cleaning up. “thanks.” i smile.

i go and wash my face and get ready for bed. i finish and join him in bed. “hi.” i croak out a bit as i lay down against him. “hey.” he smiles back. “you’re gonna be able to talk?” he asks and pulls me against him. “maybe.” i smile.

he softly laughs and kisses the top of my head. “you know i can’t stay?” he whispers after a moment. “mhm.” i nod. “where you disappearing off to?” i ask. “probably the same bar as normal.” he answers. “okay.” i nod.

“i love you.” he whispers. “i love you.” i whisper back. “i’ll stay until you sleep, how’s that sound?” he asks. “that works.” i nod as i’m already half asleep. “i’ll take you out for lunch tomorrow.” he promises. “okay.” i softly smile. “mhm.” he nods.

———

[wild-rose3090]

I'm not a whole person

I never will be

Parts of me died in the place I called home

Not a home, but a tomb

For the person I could have been

Instead of this loveless husk I've become

Angry at those who failed me

I've learned to embrace my anger

It's shown me so much

That my mistreatment is unacceptable

I deserve compassion, kindess, and love

But when you're not fed love as a child

Later you will lick it from knives

[finla2]

[kissesbeneaththescars]

🎉🎉 I WISH I WAS DEAD 🎉🎉

[curiositysavesthecat]

*this poll was submitted to us and we simply posted it so people could vote and discuss their opinions on the matter. if you’d like for us to ask the internet a question for you, feel free to drop the poll of your choice in our inbox and we’ll post them anonymously (for more info, please check our pinned post)

**if you’re struggling with mental health issues, here’s a reminder that you’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. you’ve made it this far and even if it looks like the pain is never going to end, we promise it will eventually get better as long as you hold on. again, you’ve made it this far, that’s incredible and you should be proud of yourself. just hold on even if it’s exhausting. things will get better, and one day you’ll look back with a smile on your face and be glad that you didn’t give up. we love you and we believe you’re a fighter and a survivor ♡

[nothing0fnothing]

I am 25 and I am exhausted. All the time. I am fatigued. All the time. I need space and to be alone. All the time. I want to lay down. All the time. I need a nap. All the time.

Ive been so scared that this is a sign that I will always be this lethargic, exhausted mess of a person. That I'll never live a normal life because I'll always be tired and sleepy and low energy. But I need to be kind to myself.

I need to acknowledge that although things have been fine for 3 years, things weren't fine for 22 years. I had terribly abusive and non empathetic parents who didn't put my needs first. Then I was in an abusive relationship. Then I was homeless. Then I was in another abusive relationship. Then I went no contact.

In my head this is the first time things have been OK. And I need to process and breathe and rest and be patient with myself and understand that I need to be patient with myself. That I will not just jump out of my trauma and into a normal life and suddenly be OK.

These are my first steps to healing. This account, the meds, the therapy, the good relationship, the stable environment and yes, the rest. I need it all. I will be OK. Eventually.

[freaky-flawless]

Well...I just finished the final Ghoulfriends book (not counting the Ghoul it Yourself book) Not really sure what to take away from it?

Its the case where the story builds up to this big reveal, where all the pieces are supposed to come together only for it to be underwhelming and obvious. Like...none of this would have happened if they'd just gotten rid of the dragon lady after the first book.

I've been under the impression for years that this story had its own version of how Hexiciah Steam is found, only to find out just this moment that this isn't the case. It's revealed in the story that Ramses De Nile had something to do with his disappearance, and in the epilogue Cleo finds a clue as to his whereabouts and hands it off to Robecca. And thats where it ends. There's apparently a continuance in the Ghoul-It-Yourself book of the ghoulfriends trying to track him down and I guess they just don't??? He's fully normie in this series, and his life goal was to find a way to mechanically extend the life span of normies, so they just kinda blindly hope that he managed to do that for himself and has secretly been alive for 100+ years. So the only version of Hexiciah's reemergence is in his SDCC doll diary, which doesn't tie into this at all.

Wydowna was another major disappointment. She only appeared at the very beginning of the book and the very end, and her role in the story is left weirdly vague. (She also got arrested in the third book which was wild #ACAB) I think she was supposed to be a spy for the villain but its not really spelled out exactly what she did. The only people she seemed to be spying on were high schoolers who had no idea what was going on. A LOT of weird shit happened around the school in the second book that must have been her, but no one in the story makes that connection? And its not mentioned at all. Like at one point Rochelle literally wakes up in a cocoon of webs for no reason, and no ones ever like "Wydowna what the fuck??" (Unless I'm wrong and it wasn't her, in which case its just never explained) And on top of that, despite the cover of the book showing her hanging out with the mains, they don't even end up as friends. In fact it seems Wydowna grew way closer to Cleo and Toralei at the end of the book who had previously taken any chance they could have to bully her lol. Such a wasted use of her character, and its such a shame considering she rarely features in the main canon, and she's so cool!

Oh Skelita and Jinafire were real useless too. They just showed up randomly following the villain around and that was it. Jinafire gave them a kung fu (or kung boo I guess) lesson out of nowhere which was weird and uncomfortable.

To give the book some credit though, I did like how the parents were included in the story. It was really refreshing, though I think Ghoulia's mom was mentioned more times than Ghoulia herself (who would have solved the entire mystery in less than an hour, but like I mentioned in a previous post, everyone but the main 3 are stupid)

I also like Sue Nami quite a bit, I was so worried that she'd end up being some kinda cheap twist villain, but nope! She has a fun pun name unlike a lot of the other characters (like...Fred Onarrival...c'mon man...) Definitely stealing her character for fics.

Sooo. Yeah. I have mixed feelings about this series as a whole. The first book was just plainly bad for sure, and the over arching story was disjointed and predictable (and actually follows a similar theme with monster supremacy as Frights Camera Action, just a lot worse) but once I accepted the fact that they were bad I could enjoy them a lot more. There were cute moments here and there, and starting each chapter with a Darko Dark illustration was delightful.

[modesttreat]

Me holding my inner child and letting them know they aren't alone anymore:

[mushramoo]

getting told by ur parent that they were advised to get u screened/diagnosed for something when u were little but didn’t bc they “didn’t want u to use it as an excuse” after u struggled for years thinking u were stupid/lazy/etc is probably the most insulting thing ever. like they just assumed that u knowing what was wrong with u was gonna make u not try anymore. I can understand the thought process but at the end of the day wouldn’t u rather ur kid be a little flippant with accomodations/aid than not have them at all and think they’re worthless??? idk talk to me

[mindorabydisha]

This October Month is ADHD Awareness month

Let's get to know all about ADHD.

ADHD is not a disability, it’s a different ability.

Understanding ADHD is the first step towards empathy and support.

Today at 6pm a post about ADHD will be posted.

Enjoy reading and share it.

Stay tuned for more content

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Disha Arunagiri

Counselling Psychologist

#ADHDAwarenessMonth #adhdawareness

#adhd #adhdsupport #adhdbrain

#adhdparenting #adhdparents #adhdlife #adhdmom #adhdstruggles #adhdexplained #adhdcommunity #adhddiagnosis #adhdtherapy #adhdmisconceptions #counselling #therapy #children #childpsychologist

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A post shared by Mind'Ora (@mindora_disha)

Disha Arunagiri

Counselling Psychologist

Understanding ADHD is the first step towards empathy and support.

Let's get to know all about ADHD as this October month is considered as ADHD Awareness month

Today (09/10/24) at 6pm a post about ADHD will be posted.

Enjoy reading and share it.

Follow me on Instagram

[wild-rose3090]

I don't remember how happy feels

All I know is aching, numbness, and pain

Swimming in a sea of memories

Searching for a shred of love

Only to find souls of parts of me that died

As they drown me in my misery

[starspd]

something that has given me mixed feelings in my trauma recovery is realizing that people, even abusers, can change.

they can! it’s true! and that may seem scary, like maybe it invalidates our responses (such as desiring to cut them out) but the thing is, even if they can change, even if they DO, we do not have to be there for it.

we do not owe them anything. we can leave them if we want. even if they become to best, kindest person in the world, we can still never talk to them again.

my mom has made changes. not as many as she could, but changes. i still hate her. i still limit contact as much as you can when you live with someone. and i’m allowed to. i don’t owe her shit.

i also used to be angry and aggressive as a kid. i wasn’t a bully really, i was kind most of the time, but when i got angry i couldn’t control it and was known to resort to physical attacks. when i finally got to see a psychiatrist, in my report my dad described it as “when he got angry he would go off the rails, like he became a different person”. that was from many factors, primarily unsupported autism and developing BPD + CPTSD from what my mom put me through.

i have changed. i truly have. and that’s fantastic! i no longer hurt people. i can get snappy, especially at my mom, but i no longer verbally or physically attack them. but another part that can upset me, but i realize is fair, is that the people i hurt still don’t have to like me. that’s hard, it is, but it’s fair and they deserve that, because i deserve to hate my mom too.

people can change. but that doesn’t mean we have to stick around for it.

[sveetbabied0ll]

it becomes so freeing when you realize people are just experiences.

you don’t owe them anything, not a single ounce of anything. they’re not entitled to being a part of your decision-making process just because they got an invisible title the moment you were born. they don’t get all of your good days and none of your bad days. they don’t get to know your next moves, your plan for your future or how you want to spend your life just because they’re family or family friends.

and they most certainly do not get a say, do not get to drown you in unsolicited advice, do not get to nag you about the choices you make and do not get to project their trauma and/or prey on your downfall under the guise of “protecting you” or “looking out for you”.

people don’t get to choose how you choose to live your life because they just happened to be the people who were there when you started life.

[spoonie-on-wheels86]