#Funny Language Stories

[fuckyeahchinesefashion]

It's not what I expected by 我是阿彪叻

[casa-domeupai]

General Post; Lost in Translation: Embracing the Comedy of Learning Portuguese

Years ago, I shared with my dad my eagerness to learn Portuguese, and during our trip to Lisbon, he gifted me a book. It’s a bit bittersweet that I can’t update him on finally cracking open that book after it spent far too long gathering dust. But let’s not make this a sad post, because I know my dad would beam with pride knowing I’ve embarked on this language-learning journey. I’ve decided to…

[foldingfittedsheets]

When I graduated high school my folks decided to go on a family trip to Europe. I was extremely surly about this as I had an undiagnosed UTI but I was extremely excited to speak German with native speakers, convinced I would be an asset to my family across our travels.

Tragically, it was immediately apparent that three years of public school German meant I could communicate at the level of a first grader.

I was nonetheless elated when a child approached me at the train station to ask “Haben sie ein Kuli?” “Do you have a pen?” I was able to say, “Nein, aber ich habe ein Bleistift!” “No, but I have a pencil!” The kid seemed confused by my triumphant tone but borrowed my pencil anyway.

But my absolute greatest victory in vocabulary came during an airline check. They had me go through a metal detector, and they assumed my belt had set it off. I knew my belt was non reactive metal but! My favorite jeans had lost their zipper and I had them safety pinned shut.

The man approached me with a metal detector and seemed puzzled my belt wasn’t reading. I remembered the safety pin in the front of my jeans and I happened to know the word so I joyously announced, “Ich habe ein Sicherheitsnadel!” “I have a safety pin!”

As if to an infant, the man said slowly, “Nein, das ist sein Gürtel.” “No, that is your belt.”

I waved at my crotch and insisted, “Nein, in mein Hose ich habe ein Sicherheitsnadel!” “No, in my pants I have a safety pin!”

I couldn’t remember the name for zipper but luckily he caught the shine of the metal where a zipper should be and finally realized why this crazy American teenager was gesturing to her crotch. He scanned his machine over the offending pin which pinged and he cleared me to go.

I marched off to board the plane in a glow of pride that I had gotten to use an obscure word and the poor man got to return to his day.

[they-didnt-last]

anyone interested in talking about the iconic 2000's middle-grade-bordering-on-ya book series gallagher girls??

[francesderwent]

something that I think the “have fun and be yourself” discourse tends to miss is that it’s all very well saying do whatever you want and don’t worry about what people think because the people who judge you aren’t worth your time, but sometimes you choose to act normal because you have a task to do or you’re in a conversation that you care about, and having to stop in the middle for your interlocutor to say bewilderedly “but why did you do that in such a quirky way” would be wasting time and getting off topic. choosing to act normal to avoid that is not being inauthentic out of unhealthy fear of censure. it’s just prudence.

[godilovemyhusband]

my comic made for my hubby for our anniversary — it's a series of scenes from our married life — how it looks like in our flat you can see here 💕

[kierreras]

JIARA WEEK [3/7] -> day three, underrated

expressing love

«i know your whole life, you freak when people get close. and i get it, i don't blame you»

«you're right, i flipped. you know how i'd be»

[revserrayyu]

One HSR Character a Day Day 9: Boothill

[wrencatte]

mini-fic 3! Cere POV. linguist!Cal, Mantis Crew as Family, Merrin & Cal bonding 1.2k words

“This one?”

Cal squints at it for half a second, says “yes,” then looks back down.

“What about this one?”

“Yes.”

“You didn’t even look!”

“Greez, that’s the third time you’ve shown me that one.”

“No, it – oh, wait, haha, yeah it is. Okay. Let me see….”

Cere watches in fond amusement as Greez goes back to the shelves. Merrin comes over with a tome from deeper within the city library and angles it in a way Cal can look at it without straining his neck. His expression brightens and he takes it, running his fingers over the edges and corners.

There’s a slight twist in the Force that Cere’s beginning to learn means he found an echo. She has to focus pretty hard to feel it so she only pays it enough attention to be sure Cal’s not about to fall into anything nasty – not that she can do anything about it if he does, but she likes to be prepared – and tunes back into the softly murmured conversation between Merrin and Cal.

The Nightsister looks absolutely delighted at having found something in a language Cal doesn’t recognize, all quiet pride and subtle preening. Cere hides a smile behind her hand. Adorable. Cal flips the tome open and the two of them duck heads, Cal underlining a few words with his finger and saying something that Merrin repeats. He shakes his head and says it again. Her face twists in thought as she sounds it out before giving it voice and he nods rapidly, grinning. She smiles back, one of those small soft ones that pops up whenever it’s just her and Cal.

Cere is just about to go back to her own readings when Greez arrives, BD-1 whirling on his shoulder, a book held over his head in triumph.

“Ha! Try this on for size!”

Cal takes the book carefully. “I know this one,” he tells Greez, who groans in disappointment. “But, oh wow.” He flips through a few pages, lips moving as he reads the text silently to himself. “I can’t believe they have a book written in pre-Reformation Gwyrdd’tafodi. Do you know how rare that is? When they switched over, they deliberately destroyed all they could! An archivist hid this away for a hundred years in order to get it safely off the planet. It kept getting passed down the family line until one of them got passage on a ship.”

Greez crosses one set of arms, his free hands on his hips. He watches Cal fondly as the young Jedi’s excitement grows with every page flip. “You know, I would’ve never pegged you as such a gigantic nerd.”

“Jedi were scholars and peacekeepers before they were soldiers,” Cere says quietly. A hush falls on the group. Cal ducks down, shoulders hunching, eyes kept resolutely on the page though it’s obvious he’s not reading a single word. She smiles and adds lightly, “We’re all nerds.”

Cal laughs first, tinged with grief and legitimate delight. He tucks the book Greez brought under the one Merrin showed him, which makes Merrin throw Greez a smirk and for the latero to throw his crossed arms up in the air in a huff. Cere rolls her eyes fondly and catches Cal’s gaze. He grins, unrepentant, enjoying whatever contest is going on between their friends. It gets Cal more books without him getting up, so he’s not going to stop them.

Greez’s frustration is amusing to watch, especially when he snatches BD from scanning the book Cal has open so he can co-opt the droid’s database to help find a language Cal doesn’t know. It’s not helping. BD-1’s database might be filled with years and years of history and culture but knowing the intimate details of a language instead of just a simple dictionary is completely different.

Merrin listens to Cal read out loud for a few minutes, humming at all the right moments, but obviously thinking hard about something. Cere gives up on reading her book and focuses on the two of them, curious as to what’s going to happen next.

“How many languages do you know?”

Cal’s teeth click he stops talking so fast. “I don’t know,” he admits with a shrug. “Sometimes I don’t even realize I know a language until I see or hear it again. Sometimes not even then! It doesn’t always register it as a different language. It’s just…words I understand.”

She tilts her head, expression intense. “Could you learn Dathomiri?”

He grins and quips something in the smokey, gritty sounding language of Dathomir. Merrin’s eyes widen, and then, suddenly, they glimmer with a wetness both Cere and Cal pretend they don’t see.

Knuckles pressed to her lips, she breathes a very quiet, “oh,” before clearing her throat and adding roughly, “Your accent is terrible.”

“Is it though?” Cal asks smugly.

Merrin scowls. “I will teach you more…if you want to learn.”

Cal’s expression softens. “I would love to. Thank you for sharing it with me.” He adds something in Dathomiri at the end that has Merrin abruptly turning back to their shared book, expression pained and grieving.

Cere nudges the Nightsister with a tendril of the Force and gets a small smile in response. They don’t share the same bond as Jedi do, but theirs is enough for Cere to believe her. She settles back in her chair, musing on what her life has become, sharing a bond with a Nightsister, before she shrugs it off and fully intends on finally going back to her reading with Merrin and Cal’s back-and-forth as a background noise.

Except Greez comes back again, the book he carries is much thinner than any of the ones stacked around Cal like a barrier. BD-1 clicks excitedly and Greez is grinning smugly as he waves the book in the air.

“Did you know this place has an unknown language section? Guess who found it!” he all but brags. Merrin frowns, nose wrinkling while Cal laughs brightly and holds out a hand for the book.

Greez slaps it in his hand, earning a scandalized look from one of the librarians. Merrin and Cere laugh as he hunches down with quick apologies. Cal inspects the book carefully. If there are any echoes, they’re soft and quick. He grins.

“Congratulations, Greez, I don’t know this one.”

The latero cheers silently, all four arms thrown up in victory.

Merrin rolls her eyes. “You still lost. I found one first.”

Cal hums. “Best two out of three? This place is open for another five hours.”

The two of them exchange looks for a full second before Merrin jumps out of her chair and rushes into the depths of the library. Greez yelps and follows her as fast as he can without running. Cere hides her face, as though that will keep people from realizing they’re with her. Cal laughs, covering his mouth with his book. His eyes peek over, glittering in mirth. He pulls the book away, and holds it to his cheek, leaning in like he has a secret. Cere can’t help but lean in to hear it.

“I already know the language,” he admits.

Cere blinks at him then laughs loudly – nearly getting them kicked out of the library.

[ravenalexnightwood]

MILDLY HUMOROUS ANECDOTE

Since I've gotten used to using some basic ASL around my close family, a few moments remind me that not everyone does this and it can cause confusion, lol.

For example, I was on a road trip recently with my parent, her newest partner, and my sibling. All of us are Hearing. At various points throughout the trip, I was asked some questions. It was pretty random stuff, like "Are you fine with having Hibachi for dinner?" and similar things. I would usually sign "yes" while making some humming sound from my throat (I might be explaining it wrong, but a lot of people transcribe the sound as "mhm." If you know the term for this, please let me know in the reply section.) and nodding. In recent months, I have done that regularly around my parent and sibling, sometimes just because it felt more natural/ easier than speaking when I was overstimulated or multitasking. Since we had long car rides on this trip and I was blasting music into my headphones, this was the habit I fell back on.

I asked my parent's partner (who says they want to learn ASL but hasn't started yet) if they knew the signs for "yes" and "no" on the last night of the trip. I just realized that I never really asked if they knew what I was saying or if they just were guessing my answer by the nodding and sounds.

They actually admitted that they didn't know I was using ASL and assumed I was shaking my fist at them. They said they thought I just really hated Hibachi, lol. I'm really glad I clarified.

Anyway, just thought I'd share since I found the situation mildly humorous and because American Sign Language has quickly become one of my favorite languages.

May Adonai/ Jesus bless you on your learning journey. 🤟🙃

[high-quality-tiktoks]

Ordering burgers in paris!🇫🇷🍔

[foldingfittedsheets]

I, like I suspect many of the tumblr populace, ran into the issue in my youth of reading a lot of words I never heard spoken. My vocabulary has always been above average but my implementation is often flawed.

Like the day I told my dad I was the epitome of something and he laughed in my face. It wasn’t my fault that I didn’t correctly intuit the emphasis. (Mine was Ep-i-TOME vs Ep-i-to-ME).

My dad didn’t apologize for his rudeness but after my initial disgruntlement I just learned to roll with it. I’d get corrected and laugh it off. Some words were more frustrating though because it necessitated having to rework the word in my brain every time I read it. Like a few years ago when I learned I’d had “seneschal” wrong for decades. (I can’t explain why I thought it was sen-shull and not sen-es-shawl)

I learned that I had harbinger wrong during a Transformers movie without needing to embarrass myself. Thanks, Shia Lebouf. (Har-bing-er (wrong) made way more sense than har-binge-er (right) but no one asked me)

At this point in my life though I’ve managed to work out most of the kinks. I don’t often get corrected anymore.

But there’s one other snag that crops up between me and my beloved. I’ll confidently say a word and they’ll go, “That’s not how that’s pronounced.”

“Yes it is,” I’ll say, very firmly. Because in these cases I’ll generally have heard with my ears and repeated a word verbatim. I’ll know I heard it, so it can’t be wrong.

And pretty much every time I’ll be saying the British pronunciation instead of the American one. I’ve consumed enough British media that often it’s the only time I heard certain words said and I never realized American English handles it differently.

In some cases I’ll switch to the accepted American one. But they can pry machismo out of my cold dead hands, the American version is so stupid I can’t even handle it. I now recognize we stole the Spanish word but we made it worse.

[did-sm1-say-catfish]

a few weeks ago I was practicing ASL with my teacher, and I learned the sign for cold/winter. I didn't think much of it, but later I was happy stimming and WAIT-

my happy stim is the sign for cold. I will never be able to unthink this.

plus, its a fairly common stim. Does my teacher think "cold" or "winter" when she sees me??? Am i perpetually freezing in her mind??

[demodraws0606]

Colorpalet writing 25ji's main story : It's really difficult to handle the sensitive topics without making it too triggering/blatant for younger readers. We should avoid mentioning suicide directly.

WxS events :

[liminalpebble]

Me as a teenager, studying Latin: "I must translate these verses of The Aeneid and commit them to memory forever."

37 year old me: "Fuck, this ancient graffiti reads like yelp reviews for wine and buttholes."

[ilovedthestars]

Hi Stars! I've been thinking some more about media with deep platonic relationships, and I'd like to recommend Victoria Goddard's Nine Worlds fantasy universe. She has several interconnected series set in different parts of the same world, most of which have a lot of "love as in significance" going on.

In particular, The Hands of the Emperor and its sequel, At the Feet of the Sun, focus on the deepening friendship between the Emperor and his personal secretary (later Lord Chancellor), Cliopher. The sequel makes it explicitly clear that Cliopher is ace and the relationship he dreams of having with the Emperor is a queerplatonic one. Both books are enormous doorstops, but I love their leisurely, character-focused pace and overall tone of compassion and hopefulness.

Ooh, thank you so much! I can enjoy a good doorstopper if it's well paced, and this sounds really cool. I went to go look up a summary on the author's website:

An impulsive word can start a war. A timely word can stop one. A simple act of friendship can change the course of history. Cliopher Mdang is the personal secretary of the Last Emperor of Astandalas, the Lord of Rising Stars, the Lord Magus of Zunidh, the Sun-on-Earth, the god. He has spent more time with the Emperor of Astandalas than any other person. He has never once touched his lord. He has never called him by name. He has never initiated a conversation. One day Cliopher invites the Sun-on-Earth home to the proverbially remote Vangavaye-ve for a holiday. The mere invitation could have seen Cliopher executed for blasphemy. The acceptance upends the world.

I can already feel the platonic pining, oh my goodness. That kind of imbalance, wanting to be close to someone who's revered as a ruler and a god, being devoted to them as both but also caring about them as a person--it's so juicy. I imagine this is why some people love bodyguard romances and similar plots, but knowing that the desited end state of this pining is queerplatonic makes it so much more exciting to me.

I read the sample on the website too, which is sizable and took me all the way up to the invitation. I'm intrigued by the worldbuilding, I love that the protagonist is a bureaucrat whose life's work is trying to help people and shift political systems to be better for the citizens, I love all the complicated emotions of his trip back home and trying to reconcile his two lives. I can already feel that compassionate, hopeful, contemplative tone to the writing, and I can already tell that this is a story that treats friendship with weight.

I mean, look at this:

He thought of his lord, pacing in his study, bearing the weight of the world on his shoulders. Thought of how well they worked together, the enmeshing of respect and knowledge and good humour and experience. Thought of leaving his lord to the court. Thought of leaving his friends in Solaara-Conju and Ser Rhodin and Commander Omo-how none of them had families, had lost them in the Fall. Thought of leaving his work undone. All those projects slowly, delicately, unobtrusively transforming the government according to his vision of what the world could be. Thought of his lord, never failing to do his duty. Thought of his lord, with no one to joke with him. Thought of losing that—he could not call it friendship, could he? That implied a kind of equality, and there was no equality possible between the Sun-on-Earth and anyone else. But call it a relationship, that was permissible. He suppressed the wish that he dared call his Radiancy his friend.

And this:

"You saw this beautiful place, and you thought I would like it, and that I might enjoy a—a vacation after finishing up my present project, so you rented it for a month in my name, am I correct?" Cliopher swallowed. But his Radiancy said I, not we. He held to that. "I did not presume so far, my lord. It is in my name." His Radiancy continued to frown silently for several moments longer. And then he said: "Thank you, Cliopher." When Cliopher glanced up in surprise, for his Radiancy's tone had changed utterly, he saw that his Radiancy was smiling and there was even, oh just perhaps, the suspicion of moisture in his Radiancy's eyes, and Cliopher sank back to the ground in sheer relief and wonder and also a kind of pain, for he had seen that kind of surprised pleasure before in the faces of people receiving entirely unexpected but welcome gifts. And it occurred to him, somewhat later, after they had settled into their usual work, that if he, who was the chief member of his Radiancy's household, had never before dared offer a gift to his Radiancy beyond the tithes and service expected of him, then apart from his Radiancy's sister, who barely wrote and even more rarely came to court, there was no one else to do so.

I think I am going to LOVE this book. I've requested it from my library, and I can't wait for it to get here. Thank you so much for the rec!!