#EVERY PAGE THAT I WROTE YOU WERE ON IT
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taylor swift reads my diary confirmed
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it's a pain that I caught you at a bad time it's a shame that I memorized your outline you were straight up with me you were so kind but I knew what you knew honey great minds it was harsh cause I lost what I wanted I was brave when I kissed you in London we're collateral here man we got hit hope you find somewhere safe for your baggage EVERY PAGE THAT I WROTE YOU WERE ON IT FEEL YOU DEEP IN MY BONES YOU'RE THE CURRENT and I showed no restraint it was something I was scared until you made me love it
#having such a moment with this song today esp those two lyrics#ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#EVERY PAGE THAT I WROTE YOU WERE ON IT#FEEL YOU DEEP IN MY BONES YOURE THE CURRENT#free now#the secret of us#gracie abrams#a beautiful beautiful song
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what's the threshold theory
There was a post about how Tom is the only crew member who isn't really affected by the Borg, and there's a theory that he has so much luck because he saw the past and the future when he crossed the transwarp threshold. He saw the past and the future, all of time and space. There's some subconscious part of him that remembers that experience. In fact, Tom refused to play a part in Chakotay indulging Annorax's temporal incursions, probably because a part of him knew nothing good could come of it.
If we extend that same theory to Janeway, some of her wild luck with time travel and other crack plans starts to make sense. She doesn't verbally hate time travel until after the events of Threshold, since it happens in Time and Again without complaint. Janeway has an uncanny knack for time travel, as evidenced every time she deals with it. She hates time travel, but it might be because part of her knows exactly how to manipulate the timeline. She manages to avoid the "inevitable" temporal explosion in Future's End, saving both Voyager and Braxton. She resets the entire timeline in Year of Hell, and no one else followed her reasoning. She pulled it off flawlessly. In Relativity, she senses the incidents are all related, despite it being just one reading that connects them. By the time she's involved, she has a temporal incursion factor of .0036 and a time travel protocol named after her, even if that may just be Braxton's personal grudge. Then there's Endgame, where she intentionally changes the timeline. Up until this point, she has been dragged into time travel, but for the first time, she jumps in on purpose. How does Admiral Janeway know how to get them home sooner in a way that completely avoids the Temporal Integrity Commission? It's because she has seen all of time, and part of her knows exactly what needs to happen so she can get Voyager home and do it in a way that becomes baked into the prime timeline. Maybe she doesn't consciously remember what happened during her transformation, but the experience lives in her mind somewhere, guiding her decisions.
#every day is threshold day#tldr threshold cemented the time travel shenanigans#we're not counting her disparagement of time travel in relativity i know it's technically before threshold#but they've messed with the timeline so much that her past timeline is also changed.#Time travel is funny because the past is the future the future is the past#so while relativity comes before threshold in the prime timeline her timeline has also been changed in a way that it wasn't before threshol#we could chalk it up to a writing oversight but this is more interesting#not to mention her uncanny luck with the Borg which I think ties in as well#it's part of why her instinct is so strong#also the bio neural gel packs but that's a different theory#listen she's amazing with or without having seen all of time and space but she has seen all of time and that must have affected her somehow#those little salamander babies also have all of the cosmos in their mind#tried to explain as concisely as possible but it is part of my overarching theory#she doesn't second guess herself nearly as much following their jaunt into transwarp#I have more but I'm trying to be brief cause it's written up partially in my drafts somewhere and i have some things i need to do today lol#meta#Star Trek voyager#Kathryn janeway#threshold day#did you expect me thresholdbb to not have a serious threshold theory?#listen I can make anything nonsense and turn anything into a serious theory I was known for this kinda bs in grad school#I wrote a 25 page paper on NOTHING once#I wrote a paper about how corn fields were super gay and it made my professor cry I can spin the bullshit it is one of my skills
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i really think this was the novel that birthed ecocriticism like my god. 1851. 1851!
#1 8 5 1 ?#I really have to pause every few pages at how beautifully it works through the brutality of capitalism and colonialism and industrial#fishing and just take a step back. he wrote this in 1851.#Melville makes every other 19th and 20th century author appear so hopelessly uneducated and tone deaf#like you grow up reading European fiction and quite nothing shows how starkly ensconced these authors were#in their colonial upper class privilege until you read something that shows you the beating#gory heart of the economic structure at the time#THIS PREDATED CAPITAL VOLUME 1#he wrote this!!! he wrote this before Marxist vocabulary even EXISTED#jes us ch r i st#moby dick#Herman Melville
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— Emperor Charles VI's diary entry on Count Althann's death
[text: "My only heart, my comfort, my most faithful servant, my soulmate, who loved me dearly as I did him for 19 years, [we] had a true friendship, we were one heart and one soul, and we never concealed anything from one another. He will always be in my heart, [my] beloved friend..I. have lost everything."]
#this is like. incredibly niche.#but also hopefully a quote one can look at without context and still feel emotional damage about#idk. i think about this quote probably at least once a week and then have to stare at it and cry a bit#its just GOD. yknow??????#theres this one paper(which i linked) that i originally read as research for the AU#but i go back to it probably twice a month to reread it bcs im so !!!! abt it#i think its cause charles vi is just not that relevant but is relevant to me so to have this paper abt his personal relationships is very !#its both nice as ref for the au but also very interesting to hear about historical queer relationships/dynamics#the sections about him and his wife are very endearing as well#but god like him and count althann. im literally so invested in this 300 year old relationship#this is obviously from his death which is incredibly depressing and heart wrenching to me#but the other things he wrote about althann in his diary are very sweet to me#they were inseparable to the point of often sleeping in the same bed and charles called him his 'eternal love'#AND ON ALTHANN'S DE WIKIPEDIA PAGE IT LITERALLY CALLS HIM THE EMPEROR'S FAVORITE#anyways literally every part of this quote absolutely destroys me but especially how he refers to althann and then the ending#and its interesting to me bcs apparently his diary entries were usually pretty to the point#but when various people in his as althann died he would write these extremely emotional entries that are so </3#if you have any questions abt their dynamic pls i will talk abt them 🥰🥰 i find it fascinating#theres a book about his diary but its in german and 500 pages and kinda hard to get hold in but maybe one day!!!#also in AU contexts: althann and charles vi would be mark and seb so take that as you will 🤭😭#as i said this is great for ref but also made me sooooo fucking invested in him#i have no idea how to tag this#historical#holy roman empire#emperor charles vi#catie.rambling.txt#historical quotes#habsburg#habsburg monarchy#ah wow if only my german prof could see me now. fucking...habsburg posting. why am i like this
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Someone's tiny child drew a Something and they put it in their box saying the kid drew it for me. Which is cute, I guess. My mom did stuff like this when I was a small child who was obsessed with the arrival of mail. It's in the route's case to be immortalized forever.
Now to figure out how to read the drawing so I can find what I assume is treasure beyond my wildest imagination.
#girl if this isn't a treasure map i don't know what is#Lucas knows something i don't know. but he's three so he can't tell me in words.#i just have to interpret the drawing. somehow. at least it's color coded. that helps.#the back of the page says something about how he asks where the mail is every day#she wrote that he watches for my truck but they're in the woods so i know they can't see me approach#maybe she meant he listens for the truck. it's definitely loud enough to hear from a ways away.#whatever the case. little guy tried.#i always keep drawings from kids. even though i don't like kids. there's just something raw about what they draw.#no talent. no knowledge of fundamentals. but also no fear of being cringe or failing. just vibes.#i have so many things my brother and sister drew as little littles in a drawer with my art stuff and my sister wants me to toss it all#like. no dude. you drew a 'flower' when you were 4 and I'll have it until that paper crumbles to dust.#it's from a time before you could do anything to show you appreciate the people in your life in the same way you can now#a time when a shitty drawing was the best way to say 'hey. we're cool. i appreciate your presence'#i have one from my brother from when i broke up with my hogh school boyfriend that's a transformer (i think?)#and it says - in kid spelling - i hope you aren't so sad soon#like. he was 5 or 6 when he made that. guy didn't know what i was going through. he just wanted me to feel better.#something something humans find a way to communicate with one another despite language barriers and shit
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getting told my professional emails are like fun bedtime stories that get reread & reread& reread by the people i send them to bcs they're always apparently very long(😦😦😦😦), humorous(?!?!??), charming(??), & never have a sequel bcs i do not respond after sending one 😦
#being that one kid who got in trouble for writing off the lines of a written test segment haunts me. literally haunts me#it's not a flex actually bcs there were times in english where i would write more pages for an essay#and get a 95 while someone who wrote it a day before and hit the min word requirement got a 97#LIKE!!!#IT'S . A CURSE.#NOT BEING ABLE TO CONDENSE OR CONFORM IS A CURSEEEEEEEE#DO U THINK I LIKE OVERTHINKING AND OVERACHIEVING THINGS????#NO!!!! I DONT!!!!!#i havespent HOURS on smthing like emails that shouldve been SECONDS#IIIIIII!!!! DONTNKNOW WH Y!!#AND THEN ALL ILL GET BACK IS okay. thank you ted. LIKE JUST SAY U THINK I HAVE RABIES OR SMTHING#i WISH i was into math i WISH i was GENUINELY into SCIENCE! WHY WORDS WHY WORDS NO ONE EVEN CARES ABT WORDS!!!#ARGHHHHHHH I HAT E VALUING EFFECIENCY THEN BEING UNABLE TO DO THINGS IN AN EFFECIENT MANNER TO oTHERS!!!#mY brain THINKS it's being effecient by HYPEREXPLAINING EVERY LITTLE DETAIL THAT IT HAS CONSIDERED TO BE POTENTIALLY CONFUSING IF ABANDONED#IT T HiNKS!! it's HELPING!!#MY BROTHER IN BRAiN! YOU ARE NoT HELPING!!!! YOU ARE GIVING PEOPLE DRY EYES & FATIGUE!!#ARGH! ARGK!#EVERY WHERE I GO IM COMEDY#and i HATE.IT.#BCS IT'S NOT THE COMEDY I CAN CONTROL#life is a sick comedy of underlying helplessness and we're all lear's jesters in the end in the end in the#anyways.#im glad they find it funny#at least
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prof said congrats for writing up a proposal so early i am going to get a good grade in. well this is literally going to be graded. but yk the meme
#i really hope its decent proposals are really hard for me to write. i never really understand how much im supposed to say#also i dont plan stuff in advance! i hate drafts and proposals why cant i just jump in and run w my topic#i dont Know exactly what im going to cover just yet can i get back to you once ive covered it#levi.txt#i spent One page just opening the two page proposal so. i know it needs some cleaning up#but the last time i wrote one of these i only got a 75 (not a bad grade but i could do significantly better) bc. and i am not kidding.#i wrote a several page intro abt the themes of a story i was super pumped to write. and forgot the /plot characters and title/#a 75 was honestly generous. that prof already liked me and knew my work so i got very lucky#also i just think the guy im working with for my essay is so cool and i want to impress him bfhshsk#ive taken 2 classes with him before he is so smart and so enthusiastic. i was 1 of only 3 who was there for every class both times#everyone whos helped me has been so cool and very nice to me i want to do a good job and prove that im as capable as they think#and also jesus fucking christ ive worked so hard for this degree PLEASE#if i dont get honours im walking into the forest laying down and letting the fae take me as they will#side note: i have 1.5 movies left (its late and im finishing army of the dead tomorrow + watching evil dead rise)!! thats so exciting#theyve (mostly) been really fun and i feel like i have a really good general idea of where im going w my essay now#the movie eras are starting to kind of organize themselves into coherent themes in my mind#i think its smth along the lines of racism/xenophobia -> social change -> satanic panic -> action and militarism -> prejudice/bias#and i actually think were in smth of a thematic reckoning w zombies rn as a culture that im excited to discuss!!#for so long weve accepted that zombies arent people but weve really been starting to interrogate that since abt the mid 2010s#w tropes like searching for a cure (not just a vaccine) or movies like warm bodies or evil dead where you can truly turn back#and im really excited to see where the future takes the zombie genre!!
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Every day I must act normal despite knowing how the contrast between Memphis’s and Sana’s views of authority all traces back to how they see the same quasi-omniscient system exploited and by whom.
#🪪 Memphis Mylera#🪪 Sana Staravya#⌚ second imperial civil war#===========================================#context because I have been a very poor loreposter:#M & S were raised in the same cadet center (a state orphanage that rears children to be military officers and/or sewage administrators)#(the imperial definition of “military” is /weird/)#it’s not terrible quality-of-life-wise but it comes with there literally being eyes in the walls at all times#they’re not always actively watching you but if you do something wrong you can bet your tail they’ll find out#discipline is handled by an impersonal system that visibly runs on paperwork#cadets are raised reciting “proverbs” that are things like advice on how to lead and counsels on the value of loyalty#this all ingrains it into them that the government/military is omniscient and omnipotent#and Sana escapes this and gets adopted by rebels#(and more importantly by flagrantly-lawbreaking rich people who forge her an identity without a second thought)#Memphis can’t and has basically the worst possible career where she falls through every crack and is chewed up by every gear in the machine#the only person she sees break the system is literally its god -- Presiding Imperator Cassius Banneker#(I swear to God that at the end of the day he’s a good person but man does he do some bad things)#their views come out almost polar opposites and /boy/ does it explode when they finally get to talk about them#----------------------------------------------------------------------#I wrote ten pages of analysis on this a few months back so I won’t spoil the rest#🪪 Cassius Banneker#(tangentially)#arguably I should also cite the Keplers but I don't explicitly namedrop them#nor do I describe them very well#I’ll have to do a post properly explaining their weird social class (that I just dismissed as “rich people” here)#it has no easy earth analogy (yet; I think an approximation may develop) so that may take a while
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average United States contains 1000s of pet tigers in backyards" factoid actualy [sic] just statistical error. average person has 0 tigers on property. Activist Georg, who lives the U.S. Capitol & makes up over 10,000 each day, has purposefully been spreading disinformation adn [sic] should not have been counted
I have a big mad today, folks. It's a really frustrating one, because years worth of work has been validated... but the reason for that fucking sucks.
For almost a decade, I've been trying to fact-check the claim that there "are 10,000 to 20,000 pet tigers/big cats in backyards in the United States." I talked to zoo, sanctuary, and private cat people; I looked at legislation, regulation, attack/death/escape incident rates; I read everything I could get my hands on. None of it made sense. None of it lined up. I couldn't find data supporting anything like the population of pet cats being alleged to exist. Some of you might remember the series I published on those findings from 2018 or so under the hashtag #CrouchingTigerHiddenData. I've continued to work on it in the six years since, including publishing a peer reviewed study that counted all the non-pet big cats in the US (because even though they're regulated, apparently nobody bothered to keep track of those either).
I spent years of my life obsessing over that statistic because it was being used to push for new federal legislation that, while well intentioned, contained language that would, and has, created real problems for ethical facilities that have big cats. I wrote a comprehensive - 35 page! - analysis of the issues with the then-current version of the Big Cat Public Safety Act in 2020. When the bill was first introduced to Congress in 2013, a lot of groups promoted it by fear mongering: there's so many pet tigers! they could be hidden around every corner! they could escape and attack you! they could come out of nowhere and eat your children!! Tiger King exposed the masses to the idea of "thousands of abused backyard big cats": as a result the messaging around the bill shifted to being welfare-focused, and the law passed in 2022.
The Big Cat Public Safety Act created a registry, and anyone who owned a private cat and wanted to keep it had to join. If they did, they could keep the animal until it passed, as long as they followed certain strictures (no getting more, no public contact, etc). Don’t register and get caught? Cat is seized and major punishment for you. Registering is therefore highly incentivized. That registry closed in June of 2023, and you can now get that registration data via a Freedom of Information Act request.
Guess how many pet big cats were registered in the whole country?
97.
Not tens of thousands. Not thousands. Not even triple digits. 97.
And that isn't even the right number! Ten USDA licensed facilities registered erroneously. That accounts for 55 of 97 animals. Which leaves us with 42 pet big cats, of all species, in the entire country.
Now, I know that not everyone may have registered. There's probably someone living deep in the woods somewhere with their illegal pet cougar, and there's been at least one random person in Texas arrested for trying to sell a cub since the law passed. But - and here's the big thing - even if there are ten times as many hidden cats than people who registered them - that's nowhere near ten thousand animals. Obviously, I had some questions.
Guess what? Turns out, this is because it was never real. That huge number never had data behind it, wasn't likely to be accurate, and the advocacy groups using that statistic to fearmonger and drive their agenda knew it... and didn't see a problem with that.
Allow me to introduce you to an article published last week.
This article is good. (Full disclose, I'm quoted in it). It's comprehensive and fairly written, and they did their due diligence reporting and fact-checking the piece. They talked to a lot of people on all sides of the story.
But thing that really gets me?
Multiple representatives from major advocacy organizations who worked on the Big Cat Publix Safety Act told the reporter that they knew the statistics they were quoting weren't real. And that they don't care. The end justifies the means, the good guys won over the bad guys, that's just how lobbying works after all. They're so blase about it, it makes my stomach hurt. Let me pull some excerpts from the quotes.
"Whatever the true number, nearly everyone in the debate acknowledges a disparity between the actual census and the figures cited by lawmakers. “The 20,000 number is not real,” said Bill Nimmo, founder of Tigers in America. (...) For his part, Nimmo at Tigers in America sees the exaggerated figure as part of the political process. Prior to the passage of the bill, he said, businesses that exhibited and bred big cats juiced the numbers, too. (...) “I’m not justifying the hyperbolic 20,000,” Nimmo said. “In the world of comparing hyperbole, the good guys won this one.”
"Michelle Sinnott, director and counsel for captive animal law enforcement at the PETA Foundation, emphasized that the law accomplished what it was set out to do. (...) Specific numbers are not what really matter, she said: “Whether there’s one big cat in a private home or whether there’s 10,000 big cats in a private home, the underlying problem of industry is still there.”"
I have no problem with a law ending the private ownership of big cats, and with ending cub petting practices. What I do have a problem with is that these organizations purposefully spread disinformation for years in order to push for it. By their own admission, they repeatedly and intentionally promoted false statistics within Congress. For a decade.
No wonder it never made sense. No wonder no matter where I looked, I couldn't figure out how any of these groups got those numbers, why there was never any data to back any of the claims up, why everything I learned seemed to actively contradict it. It was never real. These people decided the truth didn't matter. They knew they had no proof, couldn't verify their shocking numbers... and they decided that was fine, if it achieved the end they wanted.
So members of the public - probably like you, reading this - and legislators who care about big cats and want to see legislation exist to protect them? They got played, got fed false information through a TV show designed to tug at heartstrings, and it got a law through Congress that's causing real problems for ethical captive big cat management. The 20,000 pet cat number was too sexy - too much of a crisis - for anyone to want to look past it and check that the language of the law wouldn't mess things up up for good zoos and sanctuaries. Whoops! At least the "bad guys" lost, right? (The problems are covered somewhat in the article linked, and I'll go into more details in a future post. You can also read my analysis from 2020, linked up top.)
Now, I know. Something something something facts don't matter this much in our post-truth era, stop caring so much, that's just how politics work, etc. I’m sorry, but no. Absolutely not.
Laws that will impact the welfare of living animals must be crafted carefully, thoughtfully, and precisely in order to ensure they achieve their goals without accidental negative impacts. We have a duty of care to ensure that. And in this case, the law also impacts reservoir populations for critically endangered species! We can't get those back if we mess them up. So maybe, just maybe, if legislators hadn't been so focused on all those alleged pet cats, the bill could have been written narrowly and precisely.
But the minutiae of regulatory impacts aren't sexy, and tiger abuse and TV shows about terrible people are. We all got misled, and now we're here, and the animals in good facilities are already paying for it.
I don't have a conclusion. I'm just mad. The public deserves to know the truth about animal legislation they're voting for, and I hope we all call on our legislators in the future to be far more critical of the data they get fed.
#big cats#tiger king#my research#news#big cat public safety act#animal welfare#big cat welfare#legislation and regulation#vent post#long post#crouchingtigerhiddendata#more on the problems with the bill in the future
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i complaining :c
#bro how these ppl know how to do all the stats analysis and stats report like a proper fucking paper like where the fuck#i didn't learn this in these classes granted i suck at stats classes#but still like what the fuck#this guy in my group just wrote a whole 13 page report by himself for our group project#and not even like necessarily for the project#bc it doesn't follow all the guidelines for the project he said so i was just like#the fuck did you write this shit for fun fucking please#i wanna rant so much abt it ugh#bc like this fucking guy didn't say anythign about working on it at all#liek we were all kinda afk over break and didn't do anything but he just wrote the entire report#but he could've fucking said somehting like im gonna work on it does anypone wanna join or help or smth#lmfao i'm mad ;-; bc like yeah we procrastinated so this is kinda a big help but like still fucking BRO#we also need to put teaam members contributions in the paper and the rest of us are just like editing his report to make it shorter#and fit better within the guidelines bro i don't fucking know i don't even know how to do any of this shit bc i fucking suck at stats#so like part of me is grateful that he just fucking finished it for no reason but ugh#like idk if the instructors are gonna be suspicious of it if the whole thing is written in the same exact style#like idk anything ugh i dont like this class :c#it would've been a higher workload but part of me wishes i took the computer science dept equivalent of this class TT#bc i hate the stats department and i fucking love the cs department bro#every cs class i've taken is so good they're hard as shit but doably hard and rewarding#stats classes i just get lost bro#:))))))))))))#anyway time to keep#trying to edit this methods section#of methods that i don't know how to use at all#:DDDDDDDDD fuck me man kasjnfgbfhdgludfgioquerhgi#why the fuck am i a data science major#jeanne talks#no bc this stuff is interesting ;-; but (maybe i'm just blaming my own bad skills/work habits on the department LOL but)#the classes suck :c i could keep going but out of tags LMFAO bye chatgpt save me
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the freedom from telling him was so temporary. the second I had to be around him again I felt like I was trapped again
#isabel talks#mostly just because I am still upset and hurting and still love him#and getting over him is such a painful experience lol#and I had to be around him and just wanted to scream the entire time#like yes after I told him I was completely nonfunctional#but I also was feeling free#and like I’m getting through the day while still in pain although not as fresh#and I don’t have that feeling of freedom anymkre#I both want to be near him and also as far away from him as possible#seeing him again makes it so much harder at least in avoiding him after I told him I could hold onto that feeling#but now…………#I don’t even know what I feel completely#but I know it hurts#every page that I wrote you were on it
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baby making
ʚ pairing: husband nanami x reader
ʚ cont: fem reader, established relationship, talk of pregnancy, breeding kink, dirty talk, fingering, oral (f!r), dacraphillia, rough sex, cockwarming, Nanami is whipped
ʚ note: it’s not necessary, but a little context to the plot u can find here on this smau i wrote :3
MINORS AND AGELESS BLOGS DNI
°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:・°❀⋆.ೃ
You placed your phone down on your bedside table and rested your head on the pillow under you, sticking your arm underneath it. You could hardly contain your excitement waiting for Nanami to get home. You were unable to resist pressing your thighs together at the thought of Nanami's pure excitement when talking about getting you knocked up.
Starting a family was only something the two of you talked about when your relationship first started, as the two of you made sure you were on the same page before things got serious, and thankfully they were. Both you and Nanami eventually wanted to have kids.
Your eyes darted over to your phone on the bedside table every few minutes, your heart racing as you watched the time tick by, knowing with each growing second, Nanami was on his way home to you. You squeezed your thighs tighter together and rut your hips forward, trying to bring yourself a little relief from the friction of your clit being pressed between your thighs.
Sooner than you were expecting, you heard the familiar clicking and jingling of Nanami trying to work the door open with his keys, making you shoot up from the bed in excitement and rush out of the bedroom, running toward the front door. Nanami sighed when he finally stepped foot into the familiar environment being his own home, the scent of you filling his nostrils, making him even more antsy to see you.
As the blonde-haired man loosened his tie and started undoing the first few buttons on his shirt, you slid out from behind a wall, rushing toward him with a beaming smile on your face. Nanami's expression changed into a warmer, happier one as you quickly made your way over to him. Nanami hummed quietly as he took you into his embrace, wrapping his large arms around your body as you pressed the side of your face into his chest, inhaling his scent.
"Someone missed me." Nanami joked, rubbing his hand over the back of your head, the other rubbing your back soothingly. "You got here so quick." You responded, pulling back a bit to look him in the eyes. Nanami moved his hands in front of him to grab your soft cheeks in his warm palms, the head from his hands radiating into your skin. "You really were needy huh?" Kento cooed, watching carefully as you leaned into his touch, your facial muscles relaxing.
You let your eyes shut when Kento leaned forward and pressed a lasting kiss to your forehead, his soft lips tickling your skin before he pulled away, brushing his thumb over your cheek. "Let's move this conversation to the bedroom, hm?" Kento said softly, his deep voice melting away your tenseness. Nodding at him, you let Nanami take your hand in his and stroll in front of you, leading you to the bedroom.
You started to grow antsier by the second as you grew closer to the room, knowing exactly what conversation waited for you there. Nanami placed his hands on your thigh as you sat down on the bed against the pillows, legs folded crisscross as he sat in front of you, one leg hanging off the side of the bed.
His hand rubbing against your upper thigh should've felt soothing, but it only fueled your neediness more and more. "Why don't you tell me what you told me earlier," Nanami said, smiling at you sweetly. The scent of his cologne was filling your nose and making you dizzy, his words that put you on the spot made your heart race. You placed your smaller hand on top of his that rested on your thigh and looked into his eyes, fighting every urge that said to look away.
"I want you to get me pregnant Nanami." You said quietly, slowly stroking up his wrist and forearm before sliding back down. The small, comforting action sent shivers down his spine, his eyes following your hand's motion. "And you're sure you want this?" He asked, gripping your thigh to emphasize his words. You waited till his eyes found yours again before you gave him a small smile and nodded.
"I wanna start a family with you Ken, I think we're ready." You said, swallowing whatever saliva was left in your dry mouth. Nanami's smile grew, the tips of his ears growing red at your words. Keeping his eyes on yours, he slid his hand out from underneath yours and placed it on top of your own, caging your hand against your thigh for a moment before he gripped your wrist and started pulling it towards his body.
You held your breath, only releasing it when he finally placed your hand down on top of something hard, hot. The bulge your hand was forcefully placed on top of twitched several times under your palm, making you throb between your legs. You didn't have to look down to know what you were touching. "You know, I've been like this since you texted me at work," Nanami said calmly, his deep voice making your body tingle.
You nodded slowly in understanding, your eyebrows barely furrowing together as your arousal for him grew. Nanami started palming your hand, making you rub his bulge through his pants. The blonde-haired man released a long, low groan, his eyes falling shut as he relished in the feeling of your hand rubbing his cock through the fabric. He could feel his dick leaking pre-cum against his boxers, antsy to get out of the tight confines of his work slacks.
"You have no idea how long I've wanted this," Nanami said, leaning forward, keeping your hand pressed against his cock. You let his body guide yours to lay down against the sheets, your legs spread around his hips, making room for him between your legs. You gasped as Nanami leaned down into the crook of your neck and pressed a kiss to the soft skin there before he groped your hand on him harder, a moan spilling from between his lips and seeping into your ear.
Kento released your hand, trusting you would keep teasing him over his pants while he reached between you and placed his hand right above your pelvis. Your thighs squeezed around his waist when he pressed down, hard, making you feel his touch from the inside. "Gonna let me put a baby in here tonight? Hm?" Kento teased, rubbing your lower tummy in circles, making gasps and small moans fall from between your lips.
"Yes," You breathlessly replied, nodding at him. Kento's eyes darted back and forth from your tummy to your lustful face as he kept rubbing you there, reminding you what would be filling you up soon. "Kento's mouth fell open into a larger O when you gripped the outline of his cock through his pants, your palm rubbing against his tip just right.
"Oh fuck," He moaned, his eyes rolling back in his head for a moment before they found your face again. "Come here." Kento rushed forward and pressed his lips against yours, greedily swallowing your hums and moans. His hand on your tummy released the pressure and slid down your pelvis, quickly finding that most sensitive spot between your legs through your pants.
Nanami hummed against your lips as he started rubbing that spot with two large fingers, his face growing hotter and hotter after every moan that escaped your lips. You stroked Nanami over his pants the best you could, your cunt growing wetter as you felt Kento throb against your hand, his hips humping into your touch. He was rushing more than usual.
You knew Kento had a breeding kink, he didn't even try to hide it. The man would rather die than finish anywhere but inside of you when the two of you were fucking, he said it was a waste. Always babbling on and on about how he was going to fuck you full, knock you up, and this time when he said those things, he would really mean it. It would be more than just dirty talk to work the both of you up.
Even at the beginning of your relationship when the two of you used condoms, he still came inside you with the rubber surrounding him, pretending as if his cum was filling your womb instead of the stupid condom. Your eyebrows raised and your eyes fluttered in their sockets when Kento rubbed quick, hard circles against your clit through your pants, making your strokes on his cock pause as the pleasure clouded your head.
"Yeah? Feel good?" Nanami moaned against your lips when you broke away from the kiss, breathy moans leaking from your lungs. You nodded dumbly at his words, feeling how the heat spread through your body. "I know," Nanami responded, nodding at you. The man pulled back seconds later only to slip his fingers under the hem of your pants and panties and jerk them off your body in almost one fell swoop, his urgency making you giggle.
When Nanami turned back to you after discarding your clothes on the floor, he watched as you pressed your thighs together, hiding yourself from him as you giggled, covering your mouth with one of your hands. Nanami pouted, the blush on his face deepening as he placed his hands on the tops of your knees and forced them apart, keeping his eyes on your giggling face. "What?" He asked, keeping that stoic, pouting look on his face.
"Nothing it's just-" You reached up and grabbed his face in your soft hands, making Nanami's eyes flutter at the soft touch, his head leaning into the touch. "You're just being so needy, I like it." You said, smiling at him. Nanami turned his head in your hands and placed a kiss on your palm before he leaned back, making your hands drop back down to your sides.
Nanami lowered himself on his stomach between his thighs, placing your thighs around his head. The pressure of the soft mattress against his clothed cock felt good, bringing him a little relief while he worked you open. You sucked air in through your teeth when Nanami placed a soft kiss on the inside of your thighs, his hair tickling your skin. "How can I not be?" He responded, looking up at you, his other hand mindlessly reaching for your cunt and spreading you open, all muscle memory.
"My wife told me she wants me to give her a baby, it's hard to be calm," Nanami said before he leaned in and let his eyes close as he licked a fat stripe up the expanse of your cunt. Immediately your hands reached between your thighs to card through his hair, your neck craning itself up to watch him work between your thighs. Kento's eyebrows knit at the familiar, sweet taste of you, making him hungry for more.
That single touch of his tongue on you was the sweetest he was going to be. Kento dove in after that, like a carnivore who just had its first taste of blood after starving all winter. You squeezed his head between your thighs, allowing yourself to move your hips against his face how your body needed, just like he always told you to do. "Oh fuck Ken, oh fuck-" You whined when he shook his head back and forth against your cunt while sucking your clit between his lips.
"Mhmmm...mmmm." Nanami moaned into your cunt, acknowledging your curses and cries of his name as he fucked you with his tongue. You were unable to keep your head up any longer when Nanami's finger joined the assault on your cunt. He rubbed the tip of his finger against your entrance to warn you he was going to penetrate you before he pressed it in, his finger sliding in with barely any resistance thanks to how wet you were.
Kento got to work quickly, thrusting his finger in and out of you in time with his sucks and flicks of his tongue against your cunt. You cried out his name and gripped his hair hard between your fingers when he curled his finger straight into your g-spot, making your back arch. "Fuck- Kento right there- r-right there," You whined, your head thrashing back and forth against the pillow under your head.
You never lasted long when Kento ate you out, he was so good with his tongue and knew each and every spot that made you lose your mind. His other hand had a firm grip on your thigh, squeezing the fat of it whenever your legs around his head squeezed too tight, restricting his mobility. "Ken I'm gonna cum- s-shit-" You felt your orgasm barrel at you quick.
Kento nodded and hummed against you before he pulled his finger out of your dripping cunt to the hilt before pressing in another finger, immediately going back to the quick pace he started before in curling and thrusting his fingers inside you, abusing your g-spot. Your body shook and writhed against the sheets, almost seeming like it was trying to escape the pleasure.
"God-" You grit the word out through your teeth just before you came. Nanami sucked hard on your little bud, flicking it around with his tongue, drawing circles, and spelling his name. With one last movement of his tongue, the ball in your tummy unraveled and you were cumming all over Nanami's tongue. The man groaned feeling your walls squeeze around his fingers as he kept fucking you through it, bulling his fingers into your g-spot.
You cried broken moans of his name as you came, your head jerking side to side, eyes squeezed shut. Nanami's eyes were barely open but they were open as he watched your face screw into pleasure as you let go all over his tongue. Nanami pulled back from your cunt when your hands pushed him away feeling yourself start to go into overstimulation from his ruthless tongue.
You swallowed air greedily, fighting to catch your breath from such an intense orgasm. Your cunt clenched and twitched around nothing after Nanami slid his fingers out. The man sat up and placed your shaky, weak legs over his thighs, rubbing them soothingly as you fully came down from your orgasm.
"How was that?" Kento asked, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand before he placed his hand back on your thigh. You gave him a drunken smile, staring at his messy face and ruffled hair. "You're a mess." You smirked, reaching up to drag your hand down his chest. Kento watched your hand drag down his body and rest on his belt, your other hand joining it.
He looked back up to your face, finding your eyes already on his. The clinking of the belt echoed through the room as you worked on getting it off of him, along with unzipping his pants. Kento grabbed your hand before you could pull down his pants. The man grabbed your wrist and leaned over your body, lacing his fingers with yours as he pinned you underneath him, your hand above your head.
Kento's own hand reached down and reached into his boxers through the hole in the crotch, pulling his cock out through it, his pants still resting on his hips, just a little lower so it was more comfortable for him. You dropped your eyes to watch him jerk himself off, rubbing the pre-cum he leaked along the length of his shaft.
"I can't wait any longer, I'm sorry." Kento said, almost remorsefully. You noticed how shaky his hand was, he must really be holding back. You reached out and grabbed the first half of his cock, jerking it off with him. The man groaned at the touch, his hips jerking into your touch. "It's okay Ken, I'm ready for you." You replied, smiling genuinely at him, reassuring him you were okay.
Kento leaned forward and connected his lips with your own, his tongue pushing past your lips and entangling with your own, as he continued stroking himself, the head of his cock poking the inside of your thigh, smearing wetness on your skin. "Ken-" You tried to speak against his lips but his kiss was too hurried and forceful, drowning out any words you had to say.
You wrapped your one arm that wasn't pinned down around his neck, your nails scratching against his shirt, the fabric wrinkling under your grip. "Put it in k-kento put it in." You whined, forcing your head back against the soft pillow, allowing you to escape his life for enough time for him to hear your words. Kento groaned against your lips, not answering you with any real words as he directed his cock to your cunt, the fat, warm head of his cock rubbing against your cunt.
"Mhm, mhm." You encouraged him, moaning into the kiss, nodding against him. You could feel Nanami's hot breath tickling your face as he breathed out heavily through his nose, mixing your juices together as he rubbed himself against you. Your breath halted when Nanami caught the head of his cock against the opening of your cunt. You felt the pressure of him pushing against you, slowly feeding you his cock.
Nanami's lips separated with yours and the two of you groaned in unison when his fat head penetrated your warm walls and started sliding inside. You could feel every bump and vein of his cock rubbing inside you as he slowly pushed himself in. "Shit, I got you, I got you." Nanami groaned, his head falling into the crook of your neck, his fingers entangling with yours tighter above your head.
His breath was shaky against your neck, choked moans and breaths of air escaped him as he fought to not thrust the entirety of his cock inside you and mess you up already, you needed to adjust first. You opened your legs further around him, giving him some room as he pushed himself deeper inside. "You're so soft inside after you cum." Kento groaned into your ear.
You squeezed your eyes shut and grit your teeth as Kento fully thrust himself inside you, his balls pressing flush against your ass, his chest pressed to yours. He was letting a little bit of his body weight rest on top of you, and it felt so nice, grounding. "God-" You moaned in response to his words, your cunt tightening around him, making him release another choked groan.
Nanami leaned back and released your fingers with him, placing your legs over his shoulders before he leaned over you again, your body now folded in a mating press. "H-hah- you feel so deep like this," You whined, your voice high-pitched and whiny. You wrapped both arms around his shoulders and pulled him close, not wanting to lose the pressure of his body against yours.
Nanami slipped a hand between your bodies and found your clit with his fingers with expert precision. He began rubbing the bud in circles slowly, making your pussy squeeze around him in response, a feeling that went straight to his balls. "You should try b-being in my position, I feel like I'm in your stomach," Nanami responded, rolling his hips in circles against you, trying to stretch you open like that.
Moans and whines were pulled from your lips as each rotation he made with his hips pressed his cock against your sweet spot. The combination of his finger rubbing your clit and his cock gyrating inside you made your eyes roll back in your head. "Good, need y-you to be deep so it takes." You replied, your words needy and breathless, which you whined straight into his ear. You felt Kento's cock jump inside you before you felt his head fall limply into the crook of your neck, undoubtedly from his body going weak with pleasure.
"Please, please let me move." He begged, his deep voice sending shivers down your spine. You turned your head towards him and kissed his forehead, your hands rubbing his back. "Move Ken, fuck me, fuck a baby into me." You whispered into his ear. The blonde man wasted no time in pulling his cock out of you almost entirely before he slammed it back inside, starting up a brutal pace inside you.
Moan after moan was being forced from your lips as Kento's cock bullied right against your g-spot. You felt tears well up in your eyes immediately, just a few thrusts and he was already fucking you dumb. "You feel so good, so fucking warm." Kento babbled, his eyes pressed firmly shut, his lips pressed to your neck, occasionally pressing kisses and sucking hickeys into the skin when he wasn't spewing filth and groaning with an open mouth.
"I love you- I love you." Kento moaned, his hand gripping the underside of your thigh stronger, keeping you folded in place for him as he pulled his head up from the crook of your neck to find your fucked out face. Tears had started streaming down your cheeks, your eyebrows were knit together in pleasure and your eyes fought to stay open with each thrust. Nanami placed his forehead against yours, your skin rubbing against his with each strong thrust of his hips against yours.
"L-Love you Kento, I love you so much-" You replied, feeling yourself squeeze around him at your own words. You felt his soft lips press against your forehead softly, gently, a stark contrast from his rough hips beating your pussy up before he leaned back and held the underside of your thighs down as far as they could go, the backs of your thighs touching your body.
Kento's balls slapping against your ass were creating a loud, lewd, squelching sound that made you feel dizzy. You looked down at where your bodies were connected and watched his cock drag in and out of your cunt, a thick white ring of cum forming at the base of his cock from how wet you were. You could only watch for a few seconds before your head tipped back agaisnt the pillows, your eyes screwed shut as wonton moans left your lips. "You're taking me so well, doing so good honey." Nanami praised, shaking his head at you in awe as more and more tears spilled down your cheeks.
Nanami released you from the intense position right when your thighs started to burn, your legs falling limply over his thighs as his body was back on yours again. You were brought back down to earth when you felt Nanami's warm hand caress your cheek, his thumb wiping away the stream of tears that had spilled. Although his effort was futile as more spilled down anyway, the gesture made your heart swell.
Kento's lips found yours again, his hand sliding between your bodies again to find your clit and rub it soothingly in little circles, making the knot in your tummy tie tighter. Kento's groans and moans were much more frequent now, louder too. He wasn't one to hold back in bed, but he also wasn't super loud in terms of the volume of his moans. Tonight was different, however. He couldn't stop picturing you knocked up, your tummy round with his child after the events that were happening right in front of him. It was driving him crazy.
Nanami's lips disconnected with yours unexpectedly with a noise that sounded suspiciously like a whimper, as his head found its home in the crook of your neck once more. His hips were losing their pace, and his finger rubbing against your clit was more erratic now too as he grew close to his orgasm. "H-hahh." He moaned, his teeth sinking into the spot where your neck and shoulder connect before he released, replacing the bite with kisses.
"Kento, y-you close?" You asked, your voice shaky and broken. You already knew his answer, but you knew how much he loved when you talked during sex. "F-fuck, yes. I'm not going to last much longer." He whined, trying to bury his face deeper in the crook of your neck. The feeling of him rubbing his face against your skin, trying to hide, trying to find comfort- it made you fall in love all over again. Just that little gesture showed how much he loved you, how safe he felt with you.
"Cum inside me Kento, get me pregnant, w-wanna make you a daddy." Nanami was sure his brain had short-circulated at that moment. He had no particular kink for that word, it was just the reality of the situation had hit him when you called him that. He was going to be a father, the father of your children. "Y-you drive me crazy, you know that?" He moaned, fighting back a whine when his cockhead rubbed against a particularly soft spot inside you.
Nanami kept aiming for that spot, noticing how tight you got when he did. "I-I'm gonna fill you up, fuck a baby into you, make us parents." He groaned in return, kissing your neck wherever his lips could reach. Your eyes rolled back in your head at the attention, he was touching all of your sweet spots inside and out, you weren't going to last much longer either.
"God p-please Kento, cum with me please." You cried, pulling his body closer to yours, using whatever strength you had left in your legs to squeeze around him. Nanami's thrusting grew more erratic, his pace got faster, sloppier, as loud groans and whines spilled from his lips before his hips stilled against yours.
Both of your jaws fell open as you came together. Nanami's hot cum flooding inside the deepest part of your cunt was just the push you needed to fall over the edge. Kento's hips stuttered and rolled into yours as he pressed himself balls deep, making sure his cum would get into your womb. His finger slowed against your sensitive, throbbing clit, which was starting to hurt from all the attention.
The two of you gasped and whined against the other, holding onto each other for dear life as you rode the aftershocks of your orgasm out together. Nanami didn't stop moving his hips until he was sure he had fucked each and every last drop of his cum inside you, even fucking himself into overstimulation as long as it meant he was sure he got you pregnant.
"Fuck... I'm so full." You whispered, sliding your hand between your bodies to press on your stomach. Nanami groaned through his teeth, the moan getting cut off halfway as he felt the pressure of your hand against his dick. Kento gripped your wrist when he felt his cum move around him, flooding towards the base of his dick. "Don't," He said quietly, his voice hoarse and breathy. "You're going to push my cum out. Need to keep you full." Kento said, almost cutely.
You smiled and placed your hands on his cheeks, making him pick up his head from the crook of your neck. "Ken, you came inside me enough to make 400 kids, I'm sure one of the swimmers will stick." You joked, but Nanami's face was stone serious, he wasn't going to take any chances. His lack of reaction only made you smile harder. You leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his nose, a lasting kiss, one that transferred all the love you felt for him.
"Maybe if we're lucky we'll get twins," Kento said, the tips of his ears turning red at the thought. You shook your head and smiled, kissing him again, on the lips this time. "Someone's ambitious." You replied. "I wouldn't be surprised though. Seriously, you came so much. I don't think I've ever felt this full before." Nanami's face turned a deep crimson at your words, his eyes averting from yours. "What? Feeling shy now? After all that?" You giggled, watching how his eyes fell shut when you rubbed his cheek. He was like a cat.
"Are you alright?" Kento asked, ignoring your teasing. You nodded, wrapping your legs around his hips. "I feel perfect." You replied, smiling honestly at him. Kento sighed before resting his head on your chest. He practically purred when your hands started raking through his hair, scratching down the nape of his neck, and under the collar of his shirt, teasing his shoulders.
"You should get those pants dry-cleaned." You said, not even wanting to look at the damage your sopping cunt did to them. Nanami made a noise of acknowledgment as his body relaxed against yours, his cock now fully soft inside you. "We should clean up sleepy head, need to change these sheets." You said, trying to act responsibly even though you too felt the tiredness creeping over your body.
"Not yet, need to keep you plugged up. Let's just fall asleep like this." Kento suggested, snuggling against your chest, his hair tickling your chin. You rolled your eyes and shook your head as you stared at the ceiling. Who knew a man of Kento's age could be so childish? "I'm setting a timer for an hour, I wanna take a bath with you." You replied, raking your hands across his scalp. Nanami made a semi-coherent noise of acknowledgment, even though you know he didn't hear you.
You tried to reach over to the side table to grab your phone but Nanami's heavy body on top of yours kept you from getting very far. Sighing in defeat, you placed your hand back in Kento's slightly damp hair and began running your hands through it again, making the man hum in pleasure. You decided if he wasn't worried about it, you weren't going to be either. You were exhausted, after all, a little sleep after such a workout couldn't hurt.
When Kento felt you fully relax under him, submitting to his idea to just relax with one another, you heard his deep voice rumble your chest ever so faintly as he spoke, "You're going to be an amazing mother."
#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk x reader#jjk x y/n#jujutsu kaisen x reader#jjk x reader smut#jjk x you#jujutsu kaisen nanami#kento nanami#nanamin#nanami smut#jjk nanami#jujutsu nanami#nanami kento#nanami x reader#nanami x you#kento x y/n#jjk kento#kento x you#kento smut#kento x reader#jujutsu kento
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the next person to grimace comically when I tell them I’m an English major is getting backed over with my Kia
#it was not funny the first time it happened it is not funny the zillionth time either#most recent offender is my manager#he grimaced and I said “hey cmon” or something like that and he immediately started to defend himself. Not so funny when the other person#doesn’t laugh with you huh!#“Well we get it every year during [non-collegiate] school so how much more of it can you learn?” and then turned around and asked me what I#thought abt the “digression of language.” Sir What Does That Mean#he asked me what I liked abt English and bc one of the things I said was linguistics he went Oh what do you think about the digression!#and I was like What? and he just repeated himself 😭 “the evolution of language?” “No the digression like- you know people on the internet”#“there’s an acronym for everything now!” And I went OHHHHHH I actually wrote my graduating paper on this!! and proceeded 2 give him a#blow by blow of CMC (computer mediated communication) and why it was an adaptation of language 2 account for the missing auditory component#n he just stared at me the whole time#you know that thing adults do where they ask you abt something and when you track about it they just :)! Mhm! like they didn’t LITERALLY#just ask you. Yeah#Do you want to read my 23 page paper? Read my 23 page paper and you’ll see how much of a “digression” CMC is and maybe you’ll learn better#English too because “digression” isn’t even the right word you were looking for. Try degradation or deterioration. God#anyways. Hitting him with my car#💌
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When I was a kid I would take the last page of all my mom's sketchbooks and draw a screen on one side and a "keyboard" on the other, then prop it open and pretend we were both doing computer work. Laptops had become mainstream only 5 years earlier, so it was still thinner and lighter than real laptops, and my mom mostly worked on a Windows 95 with a monitor bigger than I was and a computer heavier than I was. I used to think YouTube was boring because it was just a couple hundred home videos filmed by strangers. I got my first camera when I was 12 and it held 10 pictures, or 1 full minute of video, without a memory card. On my first phone, which was a flip phone, it cost $1 minimum every time I sent a text, and you had to press numbers a specific number of times to make a letter. I brought my Walkman to school to listen to Lord of the Rings on cassette tapes. Nobody was allowed to use the phone when my Dad was working in the office. Yes, we had the dial-up noise. I got an AM/FM radio for my birthday one year. Another year, I got a whole box of CDs to listen to music. I wrote my first fan fiction on a Windows 98 that came with free Minesweeper and Solitaire. I was born before El Chupacabra. And now these things are gone. Wild
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summary: as children of the sacred twenty-eight, you and regulus found solace only in each other and your friendship. upon seeing how sirius began to "act out" after attending hogwarts, your parents decide to send you to beauxbatons instead – effectively separating you from your one comfort, your safe haven. you vow to keep in touch with each other and make the most of every holiday, but it is not as easy as it should be, with family and life interfering. you are finally allowed to transfer to hogwarts for your final year – what will that entail for you and your reggie?
i'm debating whether to write one long one-shot of this or if i should divide it up into a series
i think i prefer the one-shot, and then to write out certain scenes that are skipped/vague in the one-shot and post them the way i would with chapters? because i like to have the whole concept on a plate and then delve deeper. but i don't know!
im working on a reggie request where him and reader are childhood bffs separated by their parents by sending her to beauxbatons instead of hogwarts and im going INSANE. i absolutely love the angst of it all and the concept (happy ending ofc bc im not a war criminal)
afraid this will be another one of my bible-sized fics, but we'll see 🤭
#thinking out loud#also debating titles#it's a lot of yearning and drama#i'm thinking a title that has something to do with letters or distance#it's very much a gracie abrams “every page that i wrote you were on it” moment so maybe that#or something to do with “stolen” - bc they were robbed of life together uknow#beauxbatons!reader
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