#Bruce Wayne is MOTHER

[emo-batboy]

A Wild Battinson (Social Media AU)

Part 37 (Masterlist)

(Part 38)

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@bruciemilf hey bestie I’m back :D

[sleepdeprivedvigilante]

Part 1, conversations I had with my sibling (or myself, or other people) as the batfamily

Back from patrol

Tim, sitting infront fo the batcomputer as damian Enters: How'd it go Mortal, commit any war crimes while you were out with your friend patrolling?

Damian: *scoffs* Went well, even if I had I wouldn't tell you.

Someone from the justice league that batman was discussing something with in the Cave: *Blink* what the fuck-

While walking In civilian persona alone, 6 Am, seeing a shady vehicle

Duke, Muttering to himself: Don't kidnap me, it would be very unsportsmanlike.

While on stakeout after A Arkham Break-out, with fear gas on the streets

Jason, on like 2 hours of sleep : This for real should be named "Five nights at fuck around and Find tF out"

While having a heart to heart

Dick, apologizing: I'm sorry for not believing you-

Tim, on no sleep, high on trauma, and emotionally drained: A penny for my thoughts, a dollar for your feelings, and a credit card for you to shut the fuck up-

Casual talking brother bonding

Tim,optimsit turned cynist rich kid:I realized life wasn't fair when I was like- 10? Fighting for my parents attention-

Duke, A Narrows Kid, With a cold stare into nothingness: I realized life wasn't fair when I was 4 and Someone stole my Trycicle overnight. I still hold the grudge.

Dick: Are you OK? Sometimes you concern me Duke-

[ditzybat]

i love the headcannon that both tim and cass look scarily alike, to the point they could be twins.

like they both share the same general lithe build, they’re the same short height, cass has a short bob while tim has his baby mullet, their training is similar due to their backgrounds with lady shiva and the loa, and (depending on your headcanon) both waisan- so i can definitely see instances where they’re confused for each other or where they mess with everyone around them.

cass on patrol in red robin gear so tim can go on a date with bernard:

random thugs seconds away from being one hit k.o’d: yo since when did red robin start melting into the shadows like an eldritch horror?

jason: hey tim -

cass: wrong.

jason: no, im pretty sure you’re tim, i gave you that scar right there in your neck

cass: nu-uh, this is from cain

jason:

cass:

jason: well this got awkward…

steph hugging tim from behind: hey babe

tim: wrong wayne

steph: ew, i should’ve known, your ass isnt nearly as —

tim walking away with his fingers in his ears: lalalalala im not listening to you

damian: i think you’re the only one in this family i respect

tim who has been silently hanging out with him for the past 3 hours: aw thanks damian, i’ve come to love you like a brother too

damian: drake? i thought you were cassandra, my apologies, i retract my previous statement

tim: don’t care, you love me, don’t try to deny it

lady shiva hugging both tim and cass: my beautiful twins, such well trained weapons, unfortunate that you both ended up with cain

bruce pulling his children back: tim isnt yours…

shiva: well that cant be right, he’s s the spitting image of my sister carolyn, and that birth was far too painful to only produce one small child

tim: woah full circle, my drag-sona is called caroline, maybe you are my mom, i wouldn’t put it past janet drake to adopt

bruce: tim no, you’re not even the same type of asian

cass: too late, we’re blood

shiva: see!

[bruciemilf]

Okay. But when Bruce discovers Talia knew Jason was alive? That she knew his child was the man under the red hood. His boy.

Oh.

Jason’s met and memorized every facet of Bruce Wayne. He knows Bruce by the way his eyes melt when he looks at him, to the hard lines of his cowl. He knows where Bruce starts and Batman ends.

When Bruce rips off his cowl to give her the deepest glare Jason’s ever seen, he’s reminded there’s no difference. Fear hits his stomach when he swallows,

“Hey, old man, don’t fucking blame HER. She has NO obligation to you—“

Bruce’s eyes are unblinking, wide, jumping from her frozen form to him. And Jason’s suddenly 10 again, running from hungry stray dogs cornering him in a place with no exit.

Bruce’s voice is shadow and whisper, “Quiet.”

“…Okay.”

“Damian,” he rasps, pointing at the small figure with dark hair and green eyes, who looks at neither of them. He looks at Talia. Jason thinks it’s fair. He’s never seen her scared, either. “Car. Cave. Stay. “

There’s something incredibly bitter in Jason when he just does. Doesn’t ask. Doesn’t rebel. He wants to, with every fiber and matter and crumb in his body. And his body says no.

He grabs Damian like he’s an angry cat, not the small assassin he knew since he was born. He doesn’t look back. He doesn’t want to, he realizes.

“Did you know?” Bruce asks, such a deadly calm to him, too calm for the winter in his eyes. Talia would’ve preferred a blade to the neck.

She can’t meet his eye. Almost like if she doesn’t face his hatred, his disapproval, his disappointment, it doesn’t count. “I did. “

“…Whatever you do,” she’d take it as pity if he didn’t sound repulsed , “you’re still his daughter.”

[frownyalfred]

"That's all from Talia," Bruce says about a characteristic Damian absolutely, 100% inherited from him.

[strawbuddy-luv]

(Trans) Tim: -Dramatic Sigh- Well you know Robin's always been a boy so I guess I just have to pretend to be a boy if I'm gonna be Robin now. -Yet another Dramatic Sigh- Oh well! I guess I'll do it for the sake of Gotham and Justice

Batman: You know it's ok if you don't want to, Robin can be a gi-

Tim: OH WELL GUESS I'LL JUST HAVE TO WEAR BOY CLOTHES AND GET A BOY HAIRCUT AND A BOY NAME AND TELL EVERYONE I'M A BOY AND BE CALLED A BOY-

[clownzaf]

Tim is Janet Drake’s son left and right.

Tim HATES being Janet Drake’s son left and right.

Don’t get him wrong! He loves the woman but he would prefer… not… being her. She’s cold, manipulative and would not care about running you over if that’s the way to reach her goals.

Tim, sadly, is cold, manipulative and will not care about running you over if that’s the way to reach his goals.

It causes creeps in his family’s back every time that Timothy Jackson DRAKE shows up.

Bruce decides to show up to a broad meeting to see if his teenage son is doing good in his spot as CEO, and he almost leaves the room immediately when Tim starts to absolutely roast every decision ever made by Bruce or any other person in the room, with the most emotionless expression ever seen. It was all Janet Drake and Bruce was scared.

[who-always-pays-their-taxes]

Tim’s workaholic tendencies are so funny. Imagine this boy is sooo high on pain meds and trying so desperately to type up a report but it’s just “the susspetttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttggffggggggggg g gg. g” but bc he’s so out of it he’s like “i am doing so well at report writing” and so he submits it- confidentially might i add. Batman receives it like “this is obviously a coded message, my son needs help.”

[carnicer01]

Now the winner gets his prize! Come get your momma!

[p0ssym1lker]

Damian: where did the name Robin even come from?

Dick: oh it's what my mother called me but then Bruce just decided to call Jason it without asking

Jason, who very much did not know that:

Tim, who had his own theories:

Bruce, who is getting death stares from everyone: well-

[batcavescolony]

Robin&Nightwing: *out on patrol*

Robin: My girlfriends pregnant

Nightwing: *falls off the roof top* WHAT!

Robin: yeah, I hope she does ok, I'm all for whatever she wants.

Nightwing: *crawling up the wall while panicking*

Robin: -it's not my kid.

Nightwing: WHY DIDN'T YOU LEAD WITH THAT!

Robin: it's what she would have wanted.

---later---

Robin: and then Nightwing face planted off the building.

Stephanie: oh that's great 💀 do it with Batman next!

[ditzybat]

tim drake is the type of guy to drop random lore then walk away.

tim: ugh i hate baseball, it’s like, when you have to play it in order to save a whole planet once, every game after seem boring

dick: that’s not…

tim: only downside to that was how we almost totaled barts brand new spaceship

dick: what spaceship??

—

tim: oh, hi mom

shiva: hello timothy, how are you? still keeping up with your training i take it?

bruce: mother? she’s not your —

shiva: let’s spar then timothy, let’s leave it strictly non lasting injuries, i don’t rather feel like dying by your hand again today

tim: of course!! ^-^

bruce: again?

—

tim: man i forgot to take my meds again

duke: your meds for what?

tim: i have no spleen, so i have to take probiotics, it really is manageable but i dont know where those pills went

duke: i’m almost scared to ask, tim, how did you lose your spleen?

tim: weird spider dude, it was a whole thing

—

tim: you talk a lot of shit for someone who got replaced as heir to your immortal grandfathers empire by me

damian: you what!?

tim: i regularly beat his ass at online chess every week too, and i don’t think you’ve seen him since he stole your corpse

—

tim: here

jason: what’s this?

tim: a box of all the photos i took when i obsessively stalked you for your entire tenure as robin

jason: thanks?

tim: you’re welcome, bye!

jason: … creepy ass kid…

—

steph: so how did you to get together?

bernard: well —

tim: i saved him from a getting cut open by chaos monster cult members

bernard: yep, i was rescued from being a vessel for a greek god, and we just really clicked afterwards

steph: well, it’s better than the brick

[bruciemilf]

Bruce who forgets he can’t just. Pick Jason up as easily as before.

Jason will get injured, — he hates ankle wounds; they’re not like shoulder wounds, which are his favorite.

They’re pesky, and tiny but powerful, like Damian, — and Bruce casually walks up to him, tries lifting him by the armpits. One time? No go. Two times? No. The third time, he cracks his neck and does it.

Other times, Jason pretends to be asleep in the Batmobile so Bruce would carry him. Bruce forces himself not to mention Jason can’t sleep without his Wonder Woman bear.

[brie-annwyl]

So I just re blogged a post that made me think about this.

All the batboys look more like their moms than their fathers in some way.

Tim and Jason HATE IT with a burning passion. Both for different reasons of course. Tim (as the post that inspired this) is hauntingly beautiful. Just like his mother was and he is so thankful he wasn’t born a girl because he knows he would hate his looks even more than he does now.

Jason literally died because of her, she sold him off to the joker for a chance to escape. This man has MOTHER ISSUES in the biggest block letters you can imagine. Dick made the mistake of saying “she’s obviously who you get your good looks from.” And Jason refused to speak to him for weeks.

Dick will never admit it but he’s forgotten what his parents looked like before they died, he says he looks like the perfect mix of both of them when in reality he’s his mothers carbon copy and he just doesn’t remember it.

Damian is the child that actually looks like a perfect mix of his parents. He looks like a young Bruce but when standing next to Talia a lot of people would say he just looks like a masculine version of her. He takes pride in it and secretly loves it when Bruce makes a comment like “you look so much like your mom when you make that face.”

Bruce knows he looks like his mom, he just refuses to admit it. For years after she died he would see himself in the mirror and see her and it physically pained him. Now when he looks in the mirror, he sees Damian.

[zylev-blog]

“You’re late.” Danny turns around, looking at the space his nephew now occupied.

Batman frowns, then sighs. He runs a hand across his head, where his hair would be if the cowl wasn’t there. “I know, I got caught up with—“

“I’m not interested in your excuse.” He cut off Batman, “You’re never punctual anyway.”

“Mom never cared.” Batman deflected.

“Of course she didn’t. She’s a Fenton; we’re always late, it’s just part of our biology.” He crossed his arms as he tilted his head, the crown on top of his head brushing against his hair with the movement.

“Have you found her soul yet?” Batman—Bruce asked.

“Not yet. I know she’s been reborn, but I haven’t tracked it down. I’m beginning to wonder if she ended up on a different planet from ours.”

“We’ll know it when we see it.” Bruce agreed, “Until then, we do nothing.”

“Hmm.” He grunted. “How are your children?”

“They’re doing good. Damian is adjusting well. You can always meet them, you know.” Bruce offered.

“I can’t.” He denied, “Most of them aren’t blood related. Being around me for an extended amount of time would sap their life force until they were liminal. They don’t deserve that.”

“I know,” Bruce huffed, “I just wish…”

“I know, Bruce.” He put his hand on his nephew’s shoulder. “Being fully dead and the ghost king is…not always fun.” He finished lamely.

“It’s okay. You did what you could after mom and dad died.”

The air between them was sad. He wished he could say something, anything, but there was nothing left to say. As much as Danny wished he could be with his nephew’s children, it just wasn’t possible. Being the ghost king might have saved the multiverse, but the cost was that he couldn’t be around his family. The only one would be Damian, Bruce’s blood son, since ectoplasm in his veins from Jazz would protect against his aura. Bruce’s other children wouldn’t have that luxury, and he would never risk his family’s health like that.

It was a good thing Gotham owed him a favor, and she watched over them for him instead.

[lygma-nygma]

Being a batfam fan is funny because people will make a post like “here’s my headcanon-“ and it’s just something that’s directly canon to the story then post about major canon events and get everything wrong.