#Baywatch Night

[detective-jane-rizzoli]

Happy Birthday, Angie! 🎂🎁💝💖

[im-a-doctor-not-a-priest]

at the risk of being stoned to death for vulgarity, I would like to say I think Garthe would fuck Michael simply because he's narcissistic enough to fuck himself given the chance

[lesserknownhusbands]

[vforvalensa]

Watching the force fem episode of the baywatch crime noir spin off

[stanley-ballz]

Schmitti umarmt Jean Zimmer nachdem Kaiserslautern im DFB Pokal ins Halbfinale eingezogen ist

[beardedmrbean]

[annahamiltonsstuff]

Schmitti tut mir so leid bei der neuen Folge Late night Berlin. Ich fühl seinen stress so sehr.

Der arme Mann. Wenn er im Podcast schon sagt das Polizeikontrollen seine große Angst sind.

[stars-over-new-jersey]

Baywatch S3E09: "Masquerade" Mitch has some weird fantasies...

[livingmess-doingherbest]

At family dinner, the day I returned from my trip to Germany, recounting my shenanigans with my friends.

My mom, listening, looking at me with the most neutral expression known to mankind. Occasionnal "mmh", "oh" and "ah". Definitely expecting me to say something specific.

Me, trying to recall all the details.

Finally, me : "Oh right ! And I discovered that I didn't have any survival instincts. Oh and I also almost got into a fight ! But it was on another day uh."

My mom : "There it is."

[marvelobsessed134]

In my head

I would love to be those girls from the 80s and 70s who are known for being beautiful and married to rockstars. I don’t know why but, there’s something about pretty blonde women such as Pamela Anderson that inspire me and make me want to be like them. I wanna be an 80s bombshell so badly…maybe one that’s on the cover of playboy.

I think this stems from me not getting much attention for my looks. I’m not ugly at all but I don’t stand out like someone like Heather Locklear does, people don’t immediately turn their heads when I walk into a room.

I want that attention. I want people to look at me and think, “god damn she’s so sexy.” Maybe have older men look at me and go “she looks just like that playmate I used to have a crush on back in the day.” I lack in boobs (A cup, lol) and my butt isn’t that big but I do have a nice shape to my waist. I just wish to be like those playmates or rockstar wives. They’re all so beautiful and inspire me when it comes to fashion.

One of the main reasons I write fanfiction because it just makes me feel like I am those girls. Like yes, I am that model who’s married to that drummer. And yeah, it’s probably part of the fact I fantasize more than I do live in reality. In my head I’m this bombshell who makes everyone’s heads turn as she walks in the club with he tight cheetah print dress and high heels. Hair perfectly permed and teased with gorgeous red lips. The kind that would attract those rockstars who get married to any girl they find attractive. (Even though some of them end up cheating anyways).

In my head is my favorite place but also my worst nightmare. Some beautiful things come out of it while others are dark, intrusive thoughts that I can’t shake, the kind that haunt me in the middle of the night and make me shudder. The kind that make me sick to my stomach.

Anyways, I’d have a stage name too. Something more glamorous than my last name that’s not very Hollywood esq..

I’d live in a beautiful large house in LA maybe in Beverly Hills or Point Dune in Malibu. It be the style of the 80s and 90s mansions. Glamorous tiles, pilers, chandeliers, iron staircases and gates. A fountain in the front yard, an Olympic sized swimming pool.

But nothing could beat laying in satin sheets in bed that has a shell shaped headboard, with the rockstar husband of my dreams. Watching late night television and laughing at the stupid commercials (the weirdest commercials always come on in the middle of the night, why!?)

Maybe we have a dog laying at the foot of the bed, snoring loudly because dogs snore.

Or maybe I’m standing side stage at my husband’s show, cheering him on, head banging and singing along to the songs. Maybe I’m pregnant, too. With a little girl. I’d probably be fine with getting pregnant if I had this life.

Anyways, this just came to my head and I decided to ramble/write this little piece.

[thesovereignchimera]

I want y'all to be grateful I haven't subjected you to my most recent hyper fixation.

BAYWATCH NIGHTS.

[pickafandomanyfandom]

This is so fucking random but like why tf not

I spent all weekend hanging out with my best friend on call just watching movies and gossiping and talking (we live an hour away from eachother) and when I tell you I felt genuinely happy. I started a drawing I’m rly proud of, I went shopping for books baskets, and I was on call with him for like all of it. We watched “the other woman�� “Bodies Bodies Bodies” “Baywatch” (the 2017 movie) “totally killer” “tragedy girls” and “the watch” and istg I had so much fun. We were also on call for like an hour when I was shopping for his presents and I wouldn’t tell him what I was doing

[mararhodus]

X-Files Rewatch Twitter Thoughts Megapost

-In the first Tooms episode, Tom, Scully’s douchebag friend from the academy, calls her Mrs. Spooky and… y’know, I’m surprised calling Mulder and her Mr. & Mrs. Spooky isn’t more common in the fandom

-This rewatch has brought forth Space as a potential candidate for worst episode of the show, because Jesus Christ it's like if you made the most boring version of Apollo 13, added a ghost, and had Mulder and Scully stand around giving color commentary

-Genuinely so funny watching Baywatching Nights in the middle of an X-Files rewatch cuz like X-Files has some absolute dogshit episodes, but it’s still built around some of the most talented actors, writers, and sfx artists ever on TV, but Baywatch is Baywatch

-I love that by season 3, basically half the dialogue between Mulder and Scully is Mulder asking to be pegged and Scully going “Not right now, we’ve got work to do.”

-Teso Dos Bichos is a truly godawful episode, but it’s still a better 90’s horror story about cats than Sleepwalkers. I mean, I’d only really make this choice with a gun to my head, but at least I can say that it doesn’t involve incest.

-Gender Bender is an absolute fucking yikes all the way around. Even setting aside the thick layer of 90’s transphobia that coats it, it is *very* casual about Scully almost getting raped.

-Watching an episode where the killer is targeting fat women and the first victim of the episode doesn’t even weigh 200 pounds… I swear to god, the 90’s were fucked

-So I know that the ending of Paper Hearts seems to discount it, but like being one of Roche‘s victims is the only explanation The X-Files gives for Samantha Mulder’s death that makes remotely any sense, right?

[rock-me-amadeus-epic-remix]

was tagged by @gibson-gun-girl for this tag game.

Relationship status: Single

Favorite color: red and black but also pink and blue

Last song I listened to: The Fatal Impact by Dead Can Dance 

Last movie I watched: Strange Days. I did see most of Top Gun 2 some time this month but I missed some portions of it. I don't really care to watch it again.

Top 3 TV shows: Deep Space Nine, Murder, She Wrote, and Columbo

Top 3 characters: Kira Nerys, Jadzia Dax, and Jessica Fletcher  

What I'm currently reading: Neuromancer

I tag: @ratsstick, @feamyng, @bearhole, @hellmilf, @dumb-aurora

[jompsjnngurdsn]

In this episode of Baywatch Nights (a spinoff of Baywatch), David Hasselhoff is transported to a parallel dimension and fights mutants. This comes after the episode where he deals with alien spores, which follows the vampire episode. These are all facts about this show that actually existed.

And yet!

There's actual *lighting.* The locations are real locations. The actors weren't filmed on different weeks on green screens. It wasn't color-graded all to hell. Every frame isn't full of extravagantly expensive CGI created by crunch-addled, convieniently non-union workers.

This complete trash feels more real, more human than most every piece of media today. I feel like it's...well, not purposeful, but convenient, that media today is so removed from *us.* By making it the expectation that media will have high production values, require CGI, and be based on existing IP, it means that only big corporations can make entertainment. Entertainment media encourages a culture of corporate dependence, and by erasing the human, the media makes us connect more with brands than other people.

Even Baywatch Nights, which isn't aiming to enrich or communicate anything, really, can at least give us a glimpse of "here's what L.A. in the late 1990's looked like." Even the media today that isn't about space ninja wizards has been stylized to the point that it doesn't look like our world at all. Someone twenty years from now won't be able to see what life looked like right now. Just what *media* looked like right now.

I don't have a point. I just miss media being a reflection of us, instead of living *for* media. And I certainly didn't expect Baywatch Nights to inspire thoughts of any kind.

[trnsocial]

Remember That Show? Ep. 22: Baywatch Nights

We’re entering the Halloween season by exploring the 2 season spin-off, Baywatch Nights starring David Hasselhoff, Angie Harmon and plenty of sexy guest stars. We examine the bizarre  Season 2 shift from lackluster detective drama to bonkers supernatural adventure series, while also discussing the International Baywatch phenomenon, our scariest childhood TV viewing moments and more. This episode…