#Batman: Damned
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Batman: Damned #1
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chronic finger biter clark vs nose exhaler bruce
#batman#superman#dc comics#superbat#bruce wayne#clark kent#brucie wayne#randomly came up with the idea that clark would definitely bite his finger while laughing#and then bruce has that rich people laugh#but his true laugh is actually gentle and simple#also i changed my bruce wayne design bc the one i had before was bugging me#this was definitely not an excuse to simply draw superman smiling#blame tom welling and his damn canines in the smallville show#my art
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Bruce, for the record, is absolutely stoked when Jason brings Roy around.
Because this now means that he is a grandpa. He is so ready to be a grandpa. Let him be a grandpa. Please please please please-
(finally, he gets to just give things to someone. anything they want. (finally, he gets to give Jason so much money and things and Jason can't say no because they are for Lian too))
The thing is, now he is in a very deep and serious rivalry with Oliver, who will not be replaced as the number one grandpa. Absolutely not. So now they are waging war on each other for Lian's affections.
It's messy and it's bloody.
One day, during a JLA meeting, Green Arrow notices something peeking from underneath Batman's suit. It's colorful, so it stands starkly against the dark suit. It looks very familiar.
Green Arrow looks down on his hands. At the friendship bracelet Lian had made for him. He looks back up at Batman and the very familiar colorful thing he has on him.
"What is that?" He asks.
Batman turns to look at him. He follows Green Arrow's gaze, and looks at the colorful thing on him, and then at the bracelet on Green Arrow's wrist.
"What is that?" Batman asks, nodding at the bracelet.
"I asked you first."
"I asked you second."
Green Arrow glares at Batman.
"It's a friendship bracelet my granddaughter made for me", he says.
Batman glares at Green Arrow.
"And this is a friendship bracelet my granddaughter made for me", he says.
They glare at each other. The meeting room has become several degrees colder. No one dares to utter a word.
Then they both pull out their phones and make a call.
"Jason-"
"Roy-"
Jason and Roy, in their bed, both realising that their dad's are calling them at the same time: fuck whatever it is, we're going back to sleep
#this all just FUELS IT even more#because damn it! Oliver is not going to lose to BATMAN of all people#jason and roy meanwhile are pondering which one of them would be easier to get to buy them a house#since all the stuff they are buying Lian is not going to fit into their apartment for much longer#dc#jayroy#batman#bruce wayne#oliver queen#green arrow#jason todd#roy harper#arsenal#red hood
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Need a teen! Bruce au where he’s exactly like Justice League! Batman and Battinson in one. That mf put the fear of every god in Ra’s Al Ghul.
Everytime he’s in a room with someone over 30 “Teenagers” by My Chemical Romance plays in the background.
Despite that, in his own way, he’s as gentle as can be with his league. Give me a young Diana who’s getting spat on and ripped apart by the media in a way not one of her male teammates get.
And she’s Wonder Woman. She shouldn’t be affected by it. And she is, anyway. Bruce relates to that in an uncomfortable degree.
“When I first became Batman, weak men tried standing in my way, too. “
“And what did you do?”
“I stepped over them.”
He has a tiny Robin he occasionally has to keep on a leash.
Give me somewhat teen mom Bruce who struggles to wrangle his unruly six year old who likes flipping from rooftop to rooftop and thinks fighting Bane is a piece of cake.
“If Tati can do it, so can I!”
“Dick,” he paused, before handing him a handfull of candy. “Wonderful emotional manipulation. Good job.”
“:D”
#I LOVE HIMMMMM HES SO AWKWARD AND COOL TO ME#give me the league fangirling over him at every turn and he’s just Tired of them. has to call teen Clark who’s Perry White’s intern like.#‘Kal— please write about something other than Batman.’#‘Bruce. I cannot say no to you. Please don’t ask me to do that.’#alfred is extremely tired. also extremely in need of Bruce to stop being self sufficient.#let him take care of you daMN IT—#teen bruce wayne#bruce wayne#batman#batdad#writing#dick grayson#dc comics
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Bruce, fighting Ra’s al Guhl: I will never let you take my son! Damian is—
Ra’s: Fool! I’m not here for Damian.
Bruce: …
Bruce: …then why are you here?
Ra’s: To recruit my one true successor—Timothy Drake!
Bruce: the fuck
#you know that conversation back at the Batcave is gonna be awkward as hell#Bruce: Tim why does Ra’s al Guhl think you should be the heir to the league of assassins?#Tim: fuck if I know that wackos been trying to recruit me for years#Bruce: YEARS??#Tim: yeah it was something about me being the world’s greatest detective#Bruce: hold on a damn minute#dc#dc comics#bruce wayne#batman#batfamily#tim drake is batshit crazy pun intended#chaotic tim drake#tim drake is a menace#tim drake and bruce wayne#Tim Drake and Ra’s al Guhl#ra’s al ghul#league of assassins#batfam incorrect quotes#incorrect dcu#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorrect dc quotes
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pov you adopted a kid but you forgot hes not usamerican
#dick grayson#batman#nightwing#batfam#dc robin#the batman#battinson#bruce wayne#my art#the amount of time i had to convery foot to cm is disgusting be normal like rest of the world damn
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Me seeing the new Superman content we’ve been getting and realizing that we’re finally healing from the “Evil Superman” era:
#FOR SO DAMN LONG#WE WERE SUBJECTED TO POOR CHARACTERIZATION#BUT NOT ANYMORE BABY#shhh it’s ok injustice and Zack Snyder can’t get you anymore…#superman#clark kent#Superman 2023#superman 2025#james gunn dcu#james gunn#worlds finest#my adventures with superman#maws#dc#dcu#batman#dc comics
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“You wanna fight someone, you fight me” seemed like a silly rule at first. but after there was more than one batkid living in the Manor at the same time, suddenly the prospect of having to spar with Bruce on the mats because you couldn’t stop yourself from throwing a punch at Tim earlier is terrifying.
#stolen from Yellowstone#I think this is a great way to discourage the batkids fighting among themselves#mostly#like it still happens#but damn if getting beaten into the mats at 4 am reminds you why punching Tim won’t help you in the long run#bruce wayne#batman#dc#batfamily#batfam#thoughts
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It would be so funny to have Bruce reckon with his kids' weird forms of schooling. For obvious reasons, a bunch never finished much/are in the process, but he turns to Tim, and goes, "At least you've got your high school--" and Tim gives him a look.
In the midst of babysitting Bruce, concocting a fake uncle, and dealing with vigilantism, and the inability to crawl of out bed after training, Tim hasn't been to school in years.
#Bruce: Damn you guys are good for nothing#Bruce: At least Duke and Cass [both of them grimace]#Stephanie refuses to play along and Bruce insists Damian (freshly back from patrol) has to finish school or he's disowned#This is the reason Bruce wants to pretend Barbara is in some way shape or form one of his kids#batman#dc comics#bruce wayne#batfamily#personal#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#batfamily headcanons
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Almost 40 yrs later and Jason’s gotta deal with the same shit.
Original Panels from Batman Vol. 1 #408 (1987) and The Boy Wonder #2 (2024)
#dcu#batman#batfam#batfamily#bruce wayne#batkids#jason todd#damian wayne#Memes#dc memes#batfam memes#damn bitch you live like this
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grayson, ready to go in guns blazing: mama didn't raise no bitch
duke, trying to descale the situation: no no mama raised a bitch, we're going
tim, tired and wanting to get it over with: mama didn't raise no one actually, mom was absent
#i heard that meme again recently and was like wait a damn minute-#batfam#batman#dc#dick grayson#tim drake#dc robin#duke thomas#signal dc#dc red robin#nightwing
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false alarm everyone he’s fine
#damn his death didn’t even stick for a full day this time lmfaoooo#I felt like a disciple of Jesus going to bed#and then waking up to him being alive again#red hood#Batman 148#Jason Todd#my ramblings#dc
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Urban Legends was FOUL for showing us this panel of 'Bruce's dream version' of the Batfam. DC when i CATCH YOU
#batman urban legends 6#dc comics#batfam#i hate it here#you cant just show me this#dont you know im unwell?#damn#bruce wayne#batman#tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#damian wayne#stephanie brown#cassandra cain#barbara gordon#duke erasure tho where is my guy#OMG ITS KATE#why did i lowkey just not see her holy#kate kane#!!
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Back again with Danny being adopted by other batfam members.
But this time I thought of the absolute comedy of Damian, tiny squirt and five apples tall, deciding that he is now a father to a grown ass teenage Danny.
It was an accident and had never been his intention to adopt another being.
But it had been placed into Damian’s head that in order to be a potential Batman he had to have his own Robin. And the only way to have his own Robin was to have a child, similar to the way that Father would pick up the various children and teenagers amongst them.
Damain had a very specific list of requirements for his potential child-Robin. Danny did not meet any of those requirements, and yet here Damian was having forged papers for the now Daniel Al Ghul-Wayne, and beginning the treacherous affair of introducing his son to the family.
Danny twisted his new shirt sleeve with a frown. It was a nice green silk that complimented the little green that resided in his son’s eyes. Damian wished to bring out the many carefully crafted features of Danny that could match to Damian. Having his eyes pop, wild hair brushed and losing the battle to nervous hands, would have to do.
At least until Damian taught Danny his mother tongue and began the care of his culture and soon to be heritage.
#dpxdc#dp x dc#dc x dp#dcxdp#danny phantom#danny fenton#dp x dc crossover#batman#dp x dc prompt#Damian is a dad to a teenager#Danny accepts his little dad#Damian to the batfam: behold. my son and heir and Robin#Danny to the batfam: I was walking to the store and he kidnapped me. but it’s cool he cooks really good#Bruce: *drifting between scolding Damian for having kidnapped a civilian and panicking about the now legal grandson he has*#batfam: I don’t know whether to laugh or worry#Damian takes father hood very seriously#he read many children’s books to assist in raising Danny#he is actually the most well adjusted dad out of any one that the batfam knows#Danny has a bedtime and Damian will be DAMNED if his son doesn’t have a proper sleep schedule to rise and conquer the days
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Really glad we’re crowning Dick as the scariest batfamily member. Society is healing.
Don’t mind me, just imagining Bruce’s hands, big, soft, covered in the labor of violence, holding his eldest’s face, saying, “This is Dick. He’s the kindest person I know.”
Dick’s fists are behind his back. He’s holding some socialite’s bloody tongue in them. If they’re going to use it to talk shit about his father, they don’t need it. His smile is sunshine and war.
#bruce wayne#dick grayson#batdad#Bruce fully believes his children will always be those little bright eyed birds who love the world and forgive people unconditionally.#Bruce is wrong.#dc#dc comics#text#batman#LET THE BATKIDS BE SCARY GOD DAMN IT.#protective dick grayson
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