#Batman does not miss this

[proneterror204]

Freakshows broken out of Arkam Asylum and he's got a brand new staff, an necromancer staff. No more ghosts! The ghostboy has to much experience fighting them. He has something more tangible. ZOMBIES!

On a train straight out of Gotham with 200 zombie dressed as clowns and splashed with joker gas to make them smile and laugh like all clowns should. On a one way track to Amity Park. But his main attraction won't cooperate. Solomon Grundy sits chained in a cage like a circus animal. The staff doesn't work on him and he just want to be left alone. No matter, it'll be enough to piss off that goth girl.

[abisalli]

Jason Peter Todd the man that you are

[sparkoflena]

As much as I love fics of the Batfam dramatically reacting to the loss of Tim's spleen, here is what I want more of:

Bruce: So you don't have a spleen?

Tim: No, sir.

Bruce: Is Doctor Leslie aware?

Tim: She is.

Bruce: Do we have to be worried about whoever injured you coming to Gotham?

Tim: No, sir.

Bruce: Are you taking all required medication?

Tim: Yes, I am.

Bruce, releasing a sigh that is soul-deep: Okay.

Other Batkids: WHAT???

Bruce: Tim and Jason share the mantle of my Middle Child by age. They act like it. This isn't even the strangest thing I've learned about Tim.

Damian, Duke, Dick, & Cass: *all a mixture of sputtering and eyeing Jason & Tim suspiciously*

Jason: I'm offended but you're not wrong.

Tim: *shrugging in agreement and going back to whatever he was doing*

[turrondeluxe]

2003!Mikey and 2012!Mikey being silly older and little brother chronicles 🐢🤝🐢 Pt 4 - Masterpost

[oraclenthusiast]

everyone wants batman to be treated like a human and have him lose to his kids... personally i think dc should lean into his unbelievable wins. need to defeat this insanely powerful supervillain? call batman. need to fight god? batman. no explanation whatsoever, just him winning quite literally impossible fights. sic him on capitalism next.

[frownyalfred]

I think Alfred was probably a little relieved when Bruce came home from his travels/training with all of the whiny rich boy (literally) beaten out of him.

But also. I think a part of Alfred misses that whiny rich boy who can’t bother to look under the sofa for a missing pen.

[theerurishipper]

Tim Drake, for no reason at all:

Dick Grayson, Tim's big brother in every conceivable way for the past several years:

[bruciemilf]

I wonder how many times Clark and the batkids + Alfred revived Bruce with the Lazarus Pit and just never told him abt it

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt in Memes 6

Let's make it some in-world memes this time :)

[dukeofthomas]

"Jason just needs to see things from his family's perspective and understand how much they love him (despite them never actually communicating or showing him through their actions)" is out. "The batfamily putting a single bit of effort into understanding Jason and reconciling with him on his own terms" is in.

[mikakuna]

are we ready to face the truth that is bruce did not love jason as much as jason loved bruce?

[stateofconstantemotion]

Idk why this is so funny to me. Like imagine Bruce explaining this to someone.

Random Person: Oh Batman your new fighting style is so cool where'd you learn it

Random Person (Thinking): (ooh i bet it's some obscure master in some vaguely eastern place)

Batman: Me. I made it up.

Random person: Oh! that's cool too-

Batman: It's called Bam Pow.

Random Person: ...

Batman: I didn't pick the name.

[fictionalcharacters-mybeloved]

Goodbye bad feelings, hello empty memory.

Alright, I love the idea of Damian and Danny as twin who love each other very much but for some reason split up or didn't get along but learn to do so because they love each other more than they resent each other, really, I swear, but.... Danny never remembers anything from his time in the league.

Absolutely nothing, maybe he had some memories before he died for the second time, maybe he remembers Damian and he misses him, he is his brother and he loved him and.... not anymore, when he has his accident and dies for the second time his memory is lost, for a while he has a hard time recognizing his friends, he opens his eyes and doesn't know who are the guys that look so desperate in front of him.

Time goes by and although there are memories that never came back (he hardly remembers his first years with the Fentons, let alone the ones before that), he improves, learns to use his powers, gets closer to his friends, learns things again.

He discovers things in his room, something about a past he no longer knows, it bothers him not to know but even though he tries to remember nothing comes back, the name "Damian" causes him nothing, reading a little of what he wrote after researching the language he also doesn't recognize, he decides it wasn't important, not anymore at least.

He reads what he can and decides that yes, there are things he is fine without remembering, maybe he lacks context, maybe there is something there that he should discover or be more interested in a past that seems so mysterious but... if when he remembered him he thought he would be happy now that he was far away, maybe he was just as important as Dash, someone who unfortunately won't let himself be ignored but one day he will leave behind and never think of him again.

Life is good.

Or was until Robin, Gotham's vigilante, ambushes him with a heated speech full of pain and resentment while on "vacation" with his parents in Gotham.

Danny has had weird things happen to him before but he usually has context.

Robin looks furious and about to cry (if his unsteady voice says anything), Danny stares at him, from his hair to the way he moves, he pays attention to his voice and his sword but all he can say is "you know me?" without acknowledging him in the slightest.

[thecruellestmonth]

Remembering stuff like Alfred having Bruce and cutting his hair and and dressing him. Which could mean anything but really reinforce the upstairs/downstairs servile relationship. The lack of modesty or shame a rich person has around their staff is something else. And it’s just a like. Almost a Caste system where Alfred is second class and can never BE on Bruce’s level as an equal let alone authority figure. And Alfred is happy with that! Because that’s the story and he is, after all, the butler

[laufire's cool post on Alfred & Bruce]

Yeah, Alfred is not Bruce's father. Bruce is the pater familias of his household like his father before him, and Alfred is his very cherished manservant. Alfred can be a caretaker and a confidant, he can even be parental (-ish), but he's not a parent. (Note to self: rant about the awkward and aggressively enforced line between "parental" and "parent" in Batman mythos.)

IMO one of the most compact arguments on Alfred's role is in Batman: Year One (IIRC the very comic that established Alfred as an old servant of the Wayne family, instead of his original story of being hired by Bruce). Grant Morrison was on some podcast (I think either Kevin Smith's podcast or "Hypertime to Podcast"?) talking about the significance of how Bruce's first act as Batman is to ring a bell to ask for Alfred to help him. We see Morrison emphasize this moment in The Return of Bruce Wayne, where The Bell is a relic on the same level as The Pearls and The Gun.

I can agree it's a defining moment. To some extent I'm willing to accept Morrison's suggestion that Bruce ringing the bell symbolizes the value of asking for help, teamwork, comradery, family, humility, etc—and most fans would be happy to sprint with that interpretation. But I can also juggle a separate interpretation that branches off and veers to the left...

You do not ring a bell to ask for help from your parent or friends or family—you ring a bell to summon a servant.

Bruce becoming Batman in Year One is the story of a prince reclaiming his kingdom. (The Return of Bruce Wayne is a renewal of that story.) Summoning the family manservant is the act of Bruce finally accepting his royal inheritance, after his foolish attempt to slum it with the rabble. A good king is kind and attentive to his subjects, and considers the opinions of his advisors—but they're never his equals or his superiors, no matter how much he cherishes them. They're his subordinates. Nobody is on Bruce's level as an equal, nobody can win a case against his authority, in Gotham. Bruce is the rightful heir of his kingdom. The king and queen are dead, long live the king.

—I know some vocal fans are very critical of Miller, but there's no disputing that Miller's Batman: Year One is the definitive Post-Crisis story of Bruce's invention of Batman, and pretty much every modern comic writer and fan recognizes it. It's likely no comic writer or story has had as much enduring influence on the Batman mythos since Miller wrote Year One and The Dark Knight Returns. Case in point: Alfred.

So yeah. Alfred isn't Bruce's dad. The Gotham TV series probably makes the strongest case for Alfred as Bruce's dad, and even then I personally think there is wiggle room to say eh they're family and they love each other but they're not quite parent & child. Everything else—Batman '66, BTAS, the Nolan movies, Lego Batman, Battinson—ultimately doesn't Alfred cast as Bruce's dad, for the best. Recent comics and the later Arkhamverse games try to force the father-son thing, but it's cheap and unearned.

[aalghul]

this is like a shot of happiness juice for me

[batboopp]

i like ghostmaker and batman as narrative foils not in the “ghostmaker is incapable of forming relationships with or feeling empathy for others, therefore batman is better” way but in the fact that ghostmaker IS better. literally. more stronger mentally, emotionally, physically. stronger in the way he carries himself and how he sees himself and how he treats others (depending on your definition of strong) and yet, he’s still so so miserable. he can lie to himself all he wants, or ignore everything but blatant fact, but it still doesn’t change the fact that even though he follows batman’s “I work alone” rule better than the actual batman ever could, he still loses to bruce in some way. bruce was willing to shoot someone for khoa, willing to follow and stay, and khoa straight up couldn’t handle it. therefore, he is worse in the one thing that makes batman, batman. that nothing will ever tie him down, no matter what. not Bruce or his city or his rouges.

except, that’s not entirely true anymore, is it? because this time, he does stay. he meets Bruce’s kids and indulges bruce in banter and playfighting and even fake ‘dates’. he stays, and leads, batman inc. and he does it considerably better than batman. of course, he still kills people. he can barely stand batmans kids and the feeling is entirely mutual. he still treats others as expendable next to his mission. but, he stays. he stays with bruce, with someone, in some way this time. he’s learning, he’s willing to learn.