#BUT TODAY I BREAK UP A PIECE OF CHEESE

[aerequets]

WILL THE SMELL OF PROVOLONE EVER LEAVE MY HAND? WHAT DO I DO

[wasabikitcat]

Finally drew what comes to mind whenever I see video of the mascot performer out doing the birthday song while the Chuck E. Cheese animatronic is turned off sitting in the dark, still clearly visible to the audience.

(Original meme I'm referencing below)

[polarfarina]

I am really sore from work I wish riding five hours in the car didn't require having your feet on the ground

[incorrectbatfam]

Do the batfamily members ever get too into their undercover work? (Undercover in an office and theyre worried about spreadsheets, working in a warehouse and coming home complaining about missing parts)

Bruce: Status updates on your undercover missions. Dick, you first. What have you got down at the docks?

Dick: I haven't confirmed the Killer Croc sightings yet, but more importantly, our catch hasn't been measuring up to last year's. Tuna we're doing okay on, but the salmon population seems to be on the low end. I've contacted the Department of Wildlife and Fisheries but it'll be another 3-5 business days before they can come down and check it out.

Bruce: At least you're doing something to help. Jason?

Jason: Class was okay. I think the kids are warming up to me as their substitute while Mrs. Maloney is out on maternity leave. The average on the last vocabulary quiz was 83.53% so either I'm doing my job right or they need to be challenged. I'm worried about Tristan Lancy, though. He's normally a good student but his grades have been dropping recently and his parents don't seem like safe people to tell. I'll talk to him tomorrow and try to pair him up with a peer tutor if he needs it.

Bruce: Also see if he has any alternate contacts besides his parents. Tim, any updates at the chemical plant?

Tim: If by updates you mean OSHA violations, I could go on all week. We got a batch of new recruits today and they were just thrown into the work—no PPE, no safety training, nothing. This is what happens when you place production over employee well-being. I'm gonna file a complaint after this meeting. Also, I think the union will have something to say about the manager cutting people's lunch breaks short.

Bruce: I see. Damian? Please tell me you found something volunteering at the zoo.

Damian: Depends on how you define "found." While I have not obtained evidence of a mutant larvae black market, I did help some of the animals at the sanctuary make progress with their recovery. Bobo the monkey is healing from his broken arms and we're gradually getting him re-acclimated to climbing higher surfaces. Suzie the black bear was born a little prematurely but seems to be catching up to her peers in terms of growth. Lastly, we got a grant for additional wildcat research and enrichment. As an aside, we are having an educational seminar on European mountain goats this Friday at 3:30 and I expect all of you to be there.

Bruce: I'll put that on our calendars. Steph?

Steph: It's not really undercover work for me, just work. Anyway, yes the newest Batburger location is being used for money laundering. But I really need to vent about the customers for a sec. We don't open until 10 and at 9:30 this morning some moron was banging on our door demanding Jokerized cheese fries. Then right in the middle of the lunch rush, Janie got sick so I had to fill in as the cashier and it was hell. After that, I had to step in between a fight at the drive-thru because the customer claimed we only gave him nine pieces of his ten-piece Robin nuggets and tried to beat up the kid who took his order. And to top it all off, an entire high school hockey team came in five minutes before closing.

Bruce: Cass?

Cass, blowing balloons: Can't talk. Arranging bat mitzvah.

Bruce: Duke, you're my last hope.

Duke: Margie's bringing a peanut butter chocolate cake to the bake sale. I swiped her recipe and we can easily beat her. Her ganache is way too watery and just runs off the top of the cake, which isn't even leveled. She's also trying to do something with a raspberry filling that isn't working at all. It's like she couldn't decide on what to bring. The bake sale committee also asked if we can bring some apple pies because the original baker has to go out of town for a family emergency. I think we'll win if we bring them with some ice cream and a touch of caramel, even though this isn't a contest.

Bruce: Thank you. At least our most critical case has been taken care of.

Barbara: ...I'll save my book launch for later.

[dannystheone]

Merc With The Mouth (Lee DP/ Ler Wolv)

HI GUYS OMG IT'S HERE!

So I watched Deadpool and Wolverine in theaters being a big-time Deadpool fan since 2016 and I fell into the trenches HARD

I was not expecting to fixate on this movie as hard as I have but I wanted to try my hand at it! Now let me be clear, this is no @lovemybluebully work, they really have their finger on the pulse when it comes to these fics, but nevertheless, I'm still excited to share this piece :)

I hope you guys enjoy this is a big thing to take on after having not written in a while so I hope it's well received! Thank you for everything

WARNINGS: SPOILERS! Cursing, gore, violence, general shenanigans, fourth wall breaks

Wolverine snaps on Deadpool in the Honda Odyssey after hours of being a mouthy handful. But how does he deal with the silence that follows?

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hours of driving in the dusty Honda Odyssey, not getting any closer to the Borderlands where they were needed, and a jabbering idiot in his ear made Logan's eyeball twitching damn near audible.

The dense corn fields on either side of the Odyssey whipped past as Wolverine's hands clenched the steering wheel in a white-knuckled grip. Deadpool started up another nonsense topic to yap on about after Wolverine told him to shut up for the millionth time. Apparently, no one's ever taught Wade to sit in a comfortable silence.

"So if they fix your world, what's the first thing you're gonna do? Rubbing alcohol shots with a wiper fluid chaser?" Wade quipped. The weight of Wade's words hit Logan's ear like a bullet. It was the first thing Wade had said that Logan paid any real attention to, but this was arguably the most paramount.

Logan took his foot off the gas and slammed into the brake, making the Honda's tires squeal and jolt to a jarring stop. The vehicle shuddered with the sudden movements. Deadpool looked to Wolverine as Wolverine faced him, malice glinting in his eye.

"What did you say?" Wolverine asked Deadpool with chilling calm.

After discovering the ridiculousness that was Wade's so-called 'educated wish', Logan found himself in an uncontrollable rant after the days' past events caught up with him all at once. Once he started his rant, he found he couldn't stop. Everything he wanted to say to Wade that day poured out of him in a stream of hatred. Deadpool stared at him unnervingly with no comment while he raged.

"-Couldn't even save a relationship with a goddamn stripper! And motherfucker I wish I could say you die alone, but it's one of GOD'S best jokes that you can't die! Except that's on all of us!" Wolverine growled, his heart thundering in his chest after he ended his explosive tirade. He looked to Wade expectantly.

"Oh, what? You got nothin' to say, Mouth?" Wolverine spat.

Deadpool swallowed silently, being taken back to the photo that he had shown to Wolverine that had his whole world inside of it. His whole world, in one tiny polaroid. And even though it was that small, he still couldn't save it.

He felt his resolve slowly crumble as Wolverine's words started to sink in. He couldn't save Vanessa in his timeline, and when he brought her back to life she still left him. What if he failed again like he did last time, on an interdimensional scale, with not even a cream cheese spreader in hand to try to defend his loved ones? His whole world, his whole everything, lost? He couldn't defend them from an entire timeline collapsing. Maybe Logan was right-

Wolverine snapped his fingers in Deadpool's face to snap him back to reality.

"Hey, asshole. I'm talking to you. What have you got to say? You've had some idiotic little quip to respond to everything I've said to you today, and now you clam up?" Wolverine demanded.

Deadpool swallowed again and opened his mouth to speak, but he was truly lost. He was really at a loss for words. He didn't think this would ever happen to him, but he couldn't even begin to think how he could respond. Logan got him this time.

Unfortunately for Wade, this pissed Logan off worse than hearing about this 'educated wish' bullshit. Wolverine didn't want to admit that most of what he said was deflection, and he was frustrated and took it out on Deadpool. The more Deadpool was silent about his explosion, the more Wolverine would have to think and actually reflect on what he said to him. Wolverine wanted to fight, to argue now, to get this aggression out. Wolverine shifted in his seat to better face Deadpool and pointed a gloved finger in his face.

"If you think, that this stupid little game of yours with not fucking talking is gonna make me regret a SINGLE thing I said to you in any way, you're sorely fucking mistaken. We're not moving this car until you open your goddamn mouth." Wolverine snarled. Deadpool snuck a glance at the camera for this gratuitous quote from Wolverine but kept his mouth shut.

Deadpool decided to see if he could call his bluff because he was still at a loss for words. What was the point of any of this if everything would be destroyed, leaving him in the dark like his life before his family?

Wolverine growled and unsheathed his adamantium claws, and shoved them in Deadpool's ribs. The Honda Odyssey jostled with the violent movement. Blood began to seep from the wound and crawl down Deadpool's side. The red bled into the shade of Deadpool's suit. Yet, not a peep left Wade's mouth; He stared nonchalantly at the dashboard ahead of him. Nothing Deadpool couldn't handle of course. He's had worse from Vanessa in terms of penetration.

"Why is it NOW that you finally shut up? I said speak, bastard!" Despite the bliss that was Deadpool not speaking, Wolverine couldn't stand the thought of being remorseful of his words, especially in the direction of Wade Wilson. He should be able to say whatever he wanted and not feel guilt twining in his chest like barbed wire.

With an irritated sigh, Wolverine went to take his claws out of Wade's ribs. He jerked his elbow back to take his claws out, but his claws were caught on something. Grunting, Wolverine drew his elbow back more sharply on the next try, but Deadpool's body swayed with him. Now, if Deadpool were on speaking terms, he would allude to Wolverine's inability to pull out. However, he wasn't feeling funny right now.

Wolverine snarled in annoyance and grabbed Deadpool's ribs with his free hand to brace himself and wrench his claws out. Wolverine's fingers pressed into Deadpool's ribs, causing a jolt to pass through the merc. Deadpool snorted, a small sound coming out of his mouth. He slapped Wolverine's hand off his ribs, but Wolverine heard that small exchange.

"What was that? Something to say, Bub?" Wolverine tested. Deadpool stayed silent. Anger flared up in Wolverine as he clenched his fist. He shot forward and gripped his ribs with more force to seize his claws out. Deadpool jolted as he yelped and shrunk away from Wolverine's hands.

"GAH! Hey, no touching, Penn State. I don't have my rape whistle on me today." Deadpool shoved Wolverine's hand off his ribs again, but Wolverine figured this was the only way to get him talking again. Wolverine took his hand and gave Deadpool an intentional squish in his side just below his sunk claws, causing Deadpool to squeak.

"You're gonna talk, asshole. We're not moving until you show me what you thought about what I said." Wolverine needed to know how Deadpool felt about what he said so Deadpool didn't power down on him when it came to saving the world later. He needed to know that he didn't actually take those hurtful words to heart. Deadpool narrowed his eyes at Wolverine and instead tried to yank his claws out of his ribs.

"What is this, a podcast? We already hosted one to promote the movie, where you said absolutely nothing- might I add- and now you care about my opinion? Too little, too late, Fresh and Fit. You don't get my opinion, you just get to drive." Deadpool faced forward again, but Wolverine wasn't having it.

"Alright that's it you piece of arrogant shit-" Well, this was one way to get his aggression out. Wolverine took the claws that were embedded in Deadpool's ribs and used the leverage to drag Deadpool closer to him. Wolverine took his free hand and started scribbling his gloved hand on Deadpool's stomach. Wade squealed and started pushing against him immediately.

"Mahaha! Nohoho no no- wahahait! Thihihis ihihihisn't hohohow I imahahagined it!! Ahahat leheheast rehehead mhyhy AO3 fihihihirst!" Deadpool started giggling and kicking his legs, trying to curl away from Wolverine's offensive hand. Wolverine kept a gruff expression, not knowing all these inane references he liked to use. Logan scribbled his fingers into Wade's side, making the merc squeal.

"Why do you always jabber on about everything I DON'T want you to talk about. All you have to do is one simple fucking thing and you can't even do that." Wolverine grumbled. He didn't want to sit here tickling Deadpool all day, especially when they were on a world-ending time crunch, but he needed a non-sulking competent partner.

"I cahahan't! I'm tohohoo commihihitted to the bihihihit!" Deadpool shook his head as Wolverine continued, his fingers squishing into Wade's skin as he kept a firm grip on him via his claws. Logan had to admit, he couldn't remember the last time he actively tickled someone. Maybe some antics back at the academy, but that was decades ago. Hopefully, he hasn't lost his touch, however, Wolverine wouldn't be surprised if Deadpool had a thing for this kind of stuff.

"You gonna talk now? We've got no time for games." Wolverine asked. Deadpool threw up his hands and gestured to Wolverine squishing his side repeatedly while still laughing, a wordless show.

"Juhuhust stohohohop ahahalready! Thehehese ahaharen't lihihike my heheadcannons ohohf yohou 'ler'ing' ahahat ahahahall!" Deadpool shouted. Wolverine figured maybe a different spot was in order. He went lower on Deadpool's side nearing the top of his hip, and Deadpool's laughter grew louder with the motion.

"Wahahait wait wahait! I neheheed a pahahassword behehefore yohohou goho behehelow the behehelt! Thehe mohohovie is R-rahated but stihihill!" Deadpool kicked the legroom he had in front of him as Wolverine started kneading his hip with his thumb. He always had to be theatrical, no matter what.

"Why don't you just stop wasting our time and say what I want you to say. You said your world is at stake, isn't it? And you're taking up time being an ass." Wolverine gruffed. Logan's four fingers were pressed against Wade's back as his thumb pushed and pressed into the hollow of his hip, which was surprisingly easy to find through his suit. Wolverine drug Deadpool closer with his claws every time he tried to escape.

"I dohohon't knohohow whahat you wahahant mehehe to sahahay! Thihihis ihihihisn't in the scrihihipt!" Despite this being a dream come true for Wade, he did agree that they were wasting time here. He didn't know what it was Wolverine expected him to do though. He wanted feedback for exploding on him like that? He was unclear about Wolverine's goals if he didn't say them aloud.

"Stop talking and just fucking speak! Quit wasting your breath on fucking nonsense!" Wolverine demanded. He moved his hand to Deadpool's waistline above his belt and started vibrating his fingers into the skin. Deadpool snuck a suggestive look into the camera before bursting out in laughter again.

"Yohohou knohohow fohohor beheheing mahahad yohohou're dohohoing behehetter thahahan my rohohohose tohohoy!" Deadpool shouted, his hands trying to push Wolverine's hand down below his belt line while Wolverine kept up his vibrating motion. Wolverine grimaced in disgust and shoved his hand as far away from his belt as possible, which he found was lodged in Deadpool's armpit. He began scratching into the space.

"Fine, then we'll just be here all day, wasting our time, when an entire timeline is collapsing because you don't want to take two seconds to say one fucking sentence." Even Wolverine didn't know what he wanted that sentence to be. He was starting to think even if he did hear what he thought he wanted to hear, it wouldn't be enough to calm his eternal war.

"I cahahan't dohoho thahahat! I cahahan't ihihimprohovise whehen I'm beheheing tihihickled!" Deadpool countered. Being giggly didn't give Deadpool the best coordination or strength for that matter, so trying to get Wolverine's hand out of his armpit was a herculean feat.

"Whyhyhy hahahahasn't Shahawn yehehelled 'CUT' yehehehet?! Thihihis ihihihis rihihidiculous!" Even Deadpool had his limits, and he was coming up on it. Some of his fantasies were much better on paper rather than practice. Deadpool decided to try and get out of this in a way that wasn't physical. Wade swallowed the remainder of his laughs and pointed out the windshield.

"Oh my God! The Bachelorette! The TVA sent Jenn Tran to the Void?! What is she doing here?!" Deadpool put on his best convincing voice as he pointed behind Wolverine. Wolverine followed his pointed hand before inwardly cursing himself. Deadpool took his leg and shot out at Logan's jaw, kicking the mutant in the face. The force knocked Wolverine's claws out of his ribs (finally) and sent Logan into the door of the Odyssey. The Honda wobbled with the movement, Logan looking temporarily dazed.

"Finally, now you'll- Oh God." Deadpool started, but Wolverine recovered earlier than he'd thought. Wolverine held Deadpool's leg in his grip with his leg draped over the center console, a grin crafted of pure malice on Wolverine's face. Deadpool looked at the camera with a nervous expression.

"Chat, on a scale of 1 to 10, how cooked am I?" Deadpool asked before nearly screaming.

Wolverine had plunged his fingers into Deadpool's thigh and kneecap, squishing and prodding the sensitive skin on top and inside his thigh. Deadpool belly laughed when he was just giggling before, unable to truly form words now. Wolverine snorted with a frown and shook his head at the ridiculous display as he continued scribbling and scratching over Wade's thigh.

"NOHOHO! Thihihihis ihihihisn't hohohohow yohohou treheheat Mahaharvel Jehehehesus!" Deadpool laughed hysterically, his leg kicking as the ticklish electricity zapped up and down his thigh.

"Talk and I'll let go. It's really that simple, you're doing this to yourself, Bub." Despite the huge threat the timeline was facing, Wolverine was starting to brighten with this treatment of Deadpool. He didn't think it would get him this bad, and after being an insufferable prick all day, he was starting to gladden at the fact that he could get him back in some way.

"Ihihihif I hahahad it myhyhyhy wahahay, yohohou'd behehe tihihihickling ahaha dihihihifferent bohohohody pahahart!" Deadpool let out. Even when he was getting tickled to death, he had to express his quips. Not being able to be a smartass was the REAL torture.

So they were there for a minute, going back and forth between each other with Deadpool being effortlessly funny and Wolverine muttering in reply. It would be listed out here for you but the author is running out of dialogue and doesn't want to admit it.

"Okahahahay seheheheriously! Ihihihif yohohou dohohon't stohohop I'm sehehetting Dogpohohool on yohohou!" Deadpool shouted, his leg kicking and shaking from its repeated abuse from Wolverine.

"You ready to talk yet? We go any more and you're gonna hurt yourself." Wolverine eventually asked. Deadpool simply nodded, too overcome with laughter, and Wolverine let him go. Deadpool held his thudding heart while he caught his breath, glad that his mask shielded the view of his red cheeks.

"Ha... ah... and I thought Colossus was mean. He at least asks if I'm comfortable and establishes a safeword first. You're just... vicious. I don't even think Blake has explored my body like that." Deadpool took his leg off of Wolverine's lap and slouched in his seat.

"So. What do you have to say?" Wolverine asked. Deadpool's heart calmed as he opened his mouth.

"Well... truthfully... I mean if we had the time and the budget for a segment that lengthy we could have used it for scenes you'd have to open your incognito tab for-" Wolverine shot his hand out at Deadpool but didn't actually touch him, and Deadpool jumped and yelled in surprise.

"What do you have to say about what I said, smartass? No fucking games." Wolverine said with icy calm. Deadpool exhaled loudly and dropped his head back into his seat, looking up at the ceiling of the Odyssey.

"I think you're wrong. I can save my family, my universe, and my timeline because I've done it before. But not without your help. You're right, I did lie to you. I lied and I told you what you wanted to hear just so you could help me, and there's a reason why you're the anchor being and I'm not. I was willing to say anything to get you here, to help me. And I'm... I'm sorry. I am sorry. I shouldn't have done that." Deadpool looked over to Wolverine who was looking at him with a softened expression.

Wolverine took a moment before he slowly nodded.

"Okay. Come on. Let's save your fragile ass timeline and save your world, so you can stay far away from mine as possible." Wolverine said ultimately. Deadpool nodded, pumping his fists into the air.

"Yes! Ketchup and Mustard are back on the road! The fanservice is our savior once more. It's a blue moon when it doesn't work, and those odds only kick up when you're writing for Voltron." Wolverine started the car back up and began to amble down the road once more.

Only a few moments afterward did Deadpool start back up his antics after Wolverine started driving down the road in the Odyssey like nothing had happened earlier.

"Hey, Honey Badger. English or Spanish?" Deadpool asked. Wolverine narrowed his eyes at the question and shook his head.

"The hell are you asking me?" Wolverine asked. Deadpool cackled unexpectedly.

"HAH! I always knew underneath that rugged exterior was a fruit bowl on the inside. The kind of fruit bowl with a single bruised banana and a brown lime in it, with some garlic cloves at the bottom, but still a fruit bowl nevertheless. Oh, you make me happy." Deadpool went and leaned his head on Wolverine's shoulder until Wolverine shrugged him off.

Something about Deadpool's fruit bowl comment nagged at Wolverine. Something about the garlic cloves made him unexpectedly snort. Deadpool looked at him like the god that he was as a ghost of a smile traced Wolverine's lips.

"You really are the Merc with the Mouth huh? You never shut up." Wolverine commented. Deadpool reached over and gave a generous helping of pokes up and down Wolverine's side. Wolverine growled and slapped Deadpool's hand away.

"You touch me again and you lose that hand." Wolverine threatened.

"That's the game, and business is good. By the way, next time let's establish when we're going to do a tickle scene, okay? Danny tends to be insecure about the length of the tickling scenes in their works because they feel they write too much exposition." Deadpool looked into the camera and winked.

"Who the hell are you- you know what, fuck it." Wolverine shook his head once more and stared out onto the open road.

"Don't worry Danny, you're doing great sweetie. And thank all of you for your unending support. You just say the word and we'll get Steve Irwin hear singing his laughter like he's on The Greatest Showman again. We'll see you next time, here in the Borderlands." Deadpool blew a kiss into the camera and waved off the audience.

[blues824]

Prompt 30 with past Lilia if that is possible! And having baby Sliver there just clinging to reader🌸💗

~ @toconolaw | 🌸💗 anon

AWWWWW!!!

You requested: “Baby, It’s Cold Outside…” from the Fluffcember prompt list.

Preface: Reader is human, and is married to Lilia, and is female.

Lilia Vanrouge

Ever since your husband had found Silver in the forest, you had become the child’s mother. You had become the happy family you had always dreamed about, and you wouldn’t change anything about it, especially not as you are feeding a bottle to Silver and Lilia is sitting in the living room armchair in your cottage.

Silver was getting so big. Not too long ago, he had taken his first steps, and the bat fae made a remark about how he would be a fine knight for the young prince. Speaking of, he as well as Queen Maleficia were common visitors in your comfortable domicile. 

You snapped out of your thoughts when you looked at the clock, and you realized that you needed to get started on supper soon. However, you would need to go to the market to get everything you needed. You wanted to keep it light for today, so you were going to make grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup. You started writing a list, balancing the pen in one hand and the baby in the other, of everything you would need. 

“Darling, I need to go to the market to pick up a few things for supper. Please don’t burn the house down while I’m gone.” You stood up from your seat at the dining table, carrying Silver to Lilia and setting him in his lap. You placed a kiss on his lips as you headed towards the door, but you suddenly felt something tug on your dress.

You looked down to see Silver, eyes tearing up, clinging onto your skirt.

“No leave, mama!” He said before starting to cry. You picked up the crying child, started to shush him, and you got kind of irked at your husband, going to tell him off, but he was right behind you.

“Dearest, it’s snowing outside, and you could get lost out there. We will be fine without supper, as we have other food in the house,” He took the crying child from your arms, starting to rock him back and forth.

“But I wanted to make tomato soup. I know of your love of tomatoes, and I was going to make grilled cheese sandwiches to accompany it. Plus, it’s something for Silver as well, since he can have a bite of it and start to get used to actual food,” You pouted. However, you felt like standing your ground on the matter.

“Y/N, I said no. It’s cold out there, and the last thing any of us need is for you to fall ill. How will our son cope without his mother?” He lifted the baby’s face up to his, pouting just as Silver was, making your heart break at how brokenhearted he looked… Silver, not Lilia. Speaking of, the child started making grabby hands towards you, his chubby cheeks were so cute.

You took him into your arms, showering his face in kisses as he started giggling, and that’s when you noticed that your husband had placed his hand on the small of your back and started leading you back to the living room.

“You little piece of-” You started, but he placed his hand over your mouth to prevent you from finishing what you were going to say.

“Watch your tongue, dear~ We have a child in our midst…” He said with a smirk. He knew that you would prioritize the baby, as you wanted him to have the best upbringing that you could provide, and whenever you were angry at him, he would use the baby as a shield.

“Fine, you win. But only because Silver doesn’t want me to leave,” You were still pouting, but Lilia sat back down in his armchair. You thought it was all over, when he suddenly pulled you to sit in his lap. You let out a squeal of surprise, and Silver was laughing again.

“My beloved family, with my beautiful wife and my handsome son… What more could I ask for?” He said with a dreamy tone to his voice, leaning in to give you a kiss on the lips.

“...A grilled cheese…” You said with a pout, making him laugh, a beautiful sound to accompany your son’s babbling.

[stayandot8]

Emergency Contact

Genre: comfort fluff, chan's having a rough time

Relationship type: established boyfriend/girlfriend

Important Contents: slight swearing, Chan going through the stages of a panic/anxiety attack

WC: 2.4k

masterlist

The small moments I could sneak my boyfriend away from his work were few and far between. The few times it did work were a perfect storm of my big puppy eyes or a smile with just the right amount of head tilt and his need to get away from it all. Sometimes it was a member annoying him past his limit, sometimes it was his musical ear being drained and needing inspiration from the outside world. Other times, I was just too insistent and he couldn’t resist. Or so he said. But when he sat silently across the cafe table, watching the people pass by, I wondered which it was. 

“Chris?” I nudged his foot with mine, his attention snapping back to me and my plastic cup of motivation to get the day done. His eyes were big, silently asking what I nudged him for then his shoulders slumped as realization hit him. 

“I’m sorry, baby. I know I’m not the best company right now.” His gaze landed on his untouched pastry in front of him. I glanced at it, a sad smile involuntarily creeping on my face. It’s not as though he was usually talkative, but at least he looked at me from time to time. 

“It’s okay, you just seem more distracted than usual. Is it Han again? Do I need to have another talk with him? Or Minnie? Is he making more old jokes? I swear, with all the karma he’s banking, he’ll go gray before you do.” Finally. A chuckle. A small sigh of relief escaped me as I watched him break off a piece of the croissant in front of him. I didn’t even know if he had eaten earlier. “You left before I got up this morning. Or did you sleep at the studio again?”

“I tried to sleep with you for a few hours but I didn’t really sleep that well.”

“Have you eaten today?” His hand stopped, his face dropping. “Christopher.” He looked like a kid who had been caught stealing cookies. “Please tell me this croissant is not the first time you’re eating today.” He didn’t move. “Christopher! It’s four in the afternoon!”

He laughed sheepishly, slightly embarrassed by the pink tint to his cheeks. “I’m sorry! I’m sorry, it wasn’t on purpose.” He shook his head at his lap. I could only shake my head at him, a mixture of slight disappointment and exasperation clear. 

“Well you know I have to get another for you before you go, right? Even if I have to sneak it in your bag, you’re taking it. Maybe a sandwich too. Or a cake pop…”

“Hey now.” He broke me of my train of thought, that dazzling smile of his making my heart skip a beat. “I can buy my own food, thank you very much.”

“Well apparently not. Now do you want a sausage, egg, and cheese or a smoked ham?”

“I don’t want anything else than what I have in front of me.” He tried to wink at me too, but I was having none of it. 

“Tell me which one you want or I’m getting both. And a cake pop.”

“Baby-” I got out of my seat and grabbed my wallet before he could continue his thought and half-sprinted for the counter, him hot on my tail. Luckily for me, the last person in line had just finished and was walking away, leaving the perfect window for me to rush straight to the girl behind the counter. 

“Hi, can I get both the sausage egg, and cheese and the toasted ham breakfast sandwiches? Thank you.” As the payment terminal flashed with my total and within the two seconds it took to unzip my wallet, Chan had slipped his card on top of the screen. The terminal beeped with the acceptance of payment. I slapped Chan on his arm. Hard.

“Oh you’re so going to pay for that later.” He playfully smirked at me, staring at the screen to avoid my eyes. 

“I thought I just did.” 

*

*Incoming call from: Channie ❣️*

“Hello?” 

Sniffles met me on the other line. My body immediately went still, ready to jump wherever I was needed. My world stopped when Chan was in trouble. Or anxious. Or pissed. Which, all of these emotions aside, he was a generally happy guy so it didn’t happen a lot. But when it did…

“Chris? Are you okay?” I whispered into my phone, trying not to let my voice carry to any prying ears that might be nearby. I stopped in the middle of the sidewalk quickly finding a bench off to the side to sit and put my bag down. There were more wet sounds coming from the phone, which only worried me more. He tried to be strong for us, for me and his bandmates. He tried not to let his emotions out too much, but I made sure he knew that I would be there when he did need to let them out. And this was the first time he was letting me in.

“Send me your location, I’m on my way. Don’t move, okay? I’ll be there soon.” I gathered my stuff again, ready to put down my phone to see his location. 

“Don’t hang up.” More sniffles. A little part of me felt guilty for feeling relieved at being needed by him. I had always felt it was me going to him for my big feelings about the world. But this… This was new.

“I won’t. Where are you? Can you tell me where you are?” 

“Studio.” He choked out. I nodded like he could see me and started in a slight sprint, knowing the way from the store I had just left, picking up some last minute shopping for the holidays. Luckily, I hadn’t found much, so I didn’t have many bags to carry while I ran. 

“Chris, I’m on my way. Just stay put, okay? I’m coming. I’m not hanging up. Just breathe for me, baby. Take a deep breath whenever you can.” I heard some small whimpers coming from what sounded like further away, like he had set the phone down away from him. Whether he was trying to hide whatever noise he was making or what, I didn’t know. He hadn’t done a very good job because I heard everything. My veins tightened with the sudden rush of anxious adrenaline washing through me. Some ragged breaths came through the phone as the tall building I was running for came into view. The big letters on the top loomed overhead, like a constant reminder of its founder and the expectations set forth by it. 

Sometimes some of the members would talk about how said expectations were too much sometimes. They felt like they couldn’t be fully themselves under the wing of such close eyes, so they would find ways to channel that energy into other things. Most of the time it was through their music, others it was through vlogs or what they called ‘talkers’ or outings with each other. Concerts were a big thing with them too. They had less supervision on tour, so they felt they could get away with more on the road. Should they ever push it too far, there were always consequences waiting for them here at home, but never so severe that they stopped pushing their boundaries. I guess anyone would feel that way if they had to push down the parts of themselves that made them...them.

Pushing through that revolving door, I waved at the security at the front desk and grabbed my permanent guest badge that Chris had saved for me to come in whenever he was here. As long as he was, I was free to enter. I wasn’t sure what deal he had to cut to get me this pass, but I figured that in my case, ignorance was bliss. Holding the phone to my ear, I pointed to it and strolled/sprinted  past them and into the elevator. 

“Just keep trying to breathe for me, okay? I need you to try and take a breath. You might start to get a little shaky if you haven’t already. But I’m here, I’m getting in the elevator now, I’m coming.” As the elevator dinged open to let out whoever was in there, Han stepped out, head down in his phone and mask up and covering half his face. He looked up and nodded to me, clearly not surprised I was here. If he didn’t say anything to me, then I assumed he didn’t know anything that was happening to the boy on the other end of my phone line. He would’ve been a good one to call seeing as he dealt with this kind of stuff the most to my knowledge. 

Whatever force that pushed him to call me instead of one of his members, I wasn’t going to question it. I knocked softly on the studio door and let myself in. I looked around in the recording room, looking for the same boy I had seen earlier, his familiar black hat and clothing not catching my eye. But what I did see was an open file on the computer, open with the music application and unfinished. I turned once more to see my boyfriend, curled up in a ball and rocking against the wall. His phone was balancing precariously on his knee that was tucked into his chest and his head was resting on the wall with his eyes shut, like he was willing himself to calm down and keep his breathing under control. He wasn’t doing a very good job. It looked like…well, it looked like the aftermath of a panic attack. 

“Chris… Chris, baby, I’m right here.” I shoved off my bag and threw it on the couch, where it landed with a small thud. I tossed my phone on top of it. I knelt down to be eye level with him and placed my hands on his bare knees, his loose shorts had ridden up down near his upper thighs. I thought the skin contact would be better to ground him, letting him feel that I was there if he couldn’t hear me very well. I squeezed his knee with slight pressure, just in case. His cheeks were visibly wet while he tried to breathe through his mouth. I watched his chest try to rise and fall, stuttering on the way out. His lips pursed out as he breathed, his hands latching onto mine on his knees. He gripped them like he thought I would fly away if he let go. I turned my hands over to thread our fingers together and he lowered his knees and pulled me by our connected hands so that I was sitting in his lap. He only let go of my hands when I was fully in and he could wrap himself around me fully. 

I started rubbing his back, letting my nails graze him while my other hand went to the back of his head. He tucked his head into my shoulder until his breath was tickling the tiny hairs on my neck. I kissed the side of his head that I could reach. 

 And we stayed there.

*

“Any idea what brought it on? Or did it just come on out of nowhere?” 

We were still on the floor, not quite as entangled as we were before but I was still in his lap, chomping on the food we had ordered bit by bit. I wouldn’t let him stop until I felt like he had actually eaten what was close to a meal, especially when I saw both sandwiches from the shop we went to this afternoon untouched in his bag. I might’ve had to force the first couple bites on him but a girlfriend had to do what she had to do, especially when he then ‘playfully’ demanded she spoon-feed him herself. He still wasn’t back to himself, but he was getting there.

“No idea.” He said softly, chewing through his thoughts. “Nothing really happened, I just…” He trailed off. 

“It’s okay, Chan. Shit just…comes up sometimes. I know, I get it. These things can come out of nowhere and grip you and not let you go until it’s run its course. Maybe today was just your day.” He nodded in agreement, staring at the wall. 

He had one hand wrapped around my waist, half to keep me steady on his leg and half, what I believed to be the real reason, because he simply didn’t want to let go. But the other hand he was resting on his opposite thigh. Every so often he would pick at his cuticle with one of his fingers but quickly stopped, probably thinking I wouldn’t notice. 

“Do you think it had something to do with the upcoming album? Is it finished?” I pondered out loud. He quickly shook his head though, diminishing the thought. 

“No, the album is done and approved. It wouldn’t be that.” If I had known any better, I would think he was almost offended I would suggest such a thing. And in his normal state, he might have been. “Even the choreography is done. The concept art, the photocard selection, it’s all done. I don’t know what happened.” His voice was slowly getting stronger as he thought what could be the source of his panic. “I don’t know. I really don’t.”

“You know, not everything has to have a reason.” He shrugged, not really liking that answer. “But I’m happy you called me.” He smiled softly at the floor.

“You were on my mind. You’re always on my mind. I just wanted to hear your voice. That was the only thing I could think of that might help, so I called you.” I couldn't fight my smile at that. And I tried hard. 

“I would’ve been happy if you called anybody instead of facing it alone. You don’t have to face all your strong, negative emotions alone. That’s what we’re here for; your friends and me. We’re here for the good, bad, and ugly.”

“But I knew you would answer. I know… that I can depend on you when I need you.”

“And I’m so happy you know that now. As a fact, not just an idea.” 

His arm grew tighter around me.

“If I ever go to the hospital or something, I’m making sure they call you.”

[muneca-lemon-steppa]

can i just say that i am OBSESSED with your Alfie series. literally cannot get enough of it. Also!! Was wondering if you could write a fluff piece were reader gets injured and alfie comes to her rescuee? Your writing is so good <3

Hi my love! This ask was so so sweet! I am so glad you like the series, it was so much fun to share it with you guys, I know I tell y'all all the time but it's true! My heart is just so full I can't help it! And of course I can write some fluff! You know I love it hehe. I'm sorry this took a while but I hope you like it! This was actually inspired by my Thanksgiving fiasco this past year lmao. I was in charge of the turkey, mac and cheese, dessert, and potatoes. My little brother was my sous chef and I completely cut my thumb open and my brother almost passed out lmao. Anyway, sending all my love to you! - Mo

Ouch

Alfie Solomons x F!Reader, fluff, Warnings: injury, mentions of blood

There is something so soothing about the kitchen. When the world is so chaotic and cold and uncertain, the kitchen is a haven. Here it’s safe and warm and systematic. The chops and bubbling of the stove are so rhythmic, any harshness of the day just falling off your shoulders in waves. Because here you could understand and set the temperature. Here you could control the outcome and be free. Even if you were trying something new, you could be confident in the knowledge that it would always have a good outcome. It was your favorite part of the day, just cooking with Alfie. You on one side with Alfie on the opposite, working separately to jointly create beautiful.

The only problem that came with cooking, was that it was a little too peaceful. You became too relaxed. And as Alfie was apt to remind you, it wasn’t good to be too relaxed around knives and hot stoves. But it was too easy. The steady hum of the fire and boiling. The pattern you’ve gone through many a time. Your body would take over like a dance from your childhood. Your hands knew what they were doing. Your mind could take a break. And she would wander. Things to be completed in the office tomorrow. That new quilt you were making for your mother. Alfie needing a haircut.

Stir.

I need to make time for that book this weekend

Pour.

Alfie looked so handsome today if it weren’t for that awful stain on his shirt

Stir

Mama and Papa asked us to come for Shabbat this week. I need to tell Alfie.

Chop

We should go to the park this week

Chop

I wonder if we can visit Rabbi Reuben as well

Chop

Alfie’s birthday is also coming up

Chop

I’m so excited for his birthday surprise

Slice

“AH!!! Oh God ah!!”

A long and deep line blossoms on your palm. Far too entrenched in your mind, you were completely missing how the knife was getting closer and closer to your hand. You quickly grab a nearby dish towel, tightly wrapping your hand to catch the trickle dripping to the wood on the floor. Alfie is quick to you though, loudly dropping the cutlery and bowl he was holding. "Shit! Sweet heart you alright? What d'ya do to yourself?"

"Nothing nothing Alfie darling! Just a little scrape I'm sorry!"

Alfie peered at the slowly soaking dishtowel and raised his thick blonde brows at you. Mustache quirking, indicating that once again, you are a terrible liar. Gently but without holding room for argument he unraveled your makeshift bandage as you winced. His mouth furrowed and grumbled, "Ah shit treacle. This is why I always tell you right? You can't be all day dreaming when you're working in here! You insist on not letting me help ya, and then there you go fucking filleting yourself!"

Cool tears start trickling down. It burned with the introduction of the air and the embarrasment of getting a nasty cut. Alfie sighed, wiping your tears with one hand has he cradled your injury in the other. If there was one thing he hated most in the world, it was seeing you cry. "Aw my dove, no tears yeah? Not too bad ain't it? Why I don't even think it'll need a stitch I wager. Just a little alcohol on it and a bandage and you'll be right as rain. C'mon my angel, let's get you better aye? Dinner can wait a few minutes."

Despite having a terrible temper and being completely and utterly impatient... Alfie Solomons was an incredibly gentle and tender nurse. Stern. Always stern. And teasing. And scolding. But gentle above all else. You winced and shed a small tear when Alfie poured the clear and horrendous smelling alcohol on your wound. He tutted and kissed your temple all the while telling you, "Maybe this'll teach you eh? Nothing like a war would to make you more smart about your surroundings."

You thanked your lucky stars you didn't need a stitch at all. Despite the blood it was really a shallow cut. Alfie wrapped your hand skillfully. Pressing a kiss right over the bandage as the final salve. As you whispered a chaste thank you, Alfie pulled you into his chest saying, "Now listen my dove. I don't like to baby you. You are a grown woman and I'm not one to tell woman how to conduct herself or her affairs. But I get worried about you. Always drifting off somewhere in that pretty head. Not watching yourself. Not wanting help. You have got to let me help you my darling. Yeah?"

You nod, kissing him to assure him that you are ok. He chuckles kissing you back. Pushing you to the dining room chair he teases you further, "Now my dear patient, it is imperative that you sit there and keep that hand elevated. Lots of rest of relaxation yeah?"

"Alfie! I have to finish dinner!"

"No I'm sorry treacle but it is the doctor's orders! Can't have you losing a finger next can we?"

You laugh and argue with him, eventually get him to compromise to allowing you to fill a pitcher with water and set the kettle on. No matter what the others of Camden said, they could never say that he wasn't a good man.

[sssailorvanya]

for once in my life, let me get what i want. [battinson]

please ignore my shit tenses | wc: 780(?)

You’ve never been one to ask for more beyond what you’re given. Your feet are always impossibly cold and your smile is missing from your face these days. Winter’s hard enough as it is. You didn’t know how to feel about the mysterious man dressed up as a bat, running around at night to fight crime.

You’ve heard what this mysterious vigilante does to the rogue criminals he catches. You’ve even witnessed his brutality a few times, thankfully never aimed at you. He saved you once. You were walking home, with your cold feet and blank expression, and a group of men had jumped out of a nearby alley. You had thought, ‘oh fuck, here we go again,’ and prepared to hand over your meagre possessions. You had not anticipated the fearsome vigilante materialising out of nowhere, throttling the living daylights out of all the men until they cowered in fear. You had watched, dumbfounded, as he picked up your small, bright pink purse and handed it to you.

You almost wanted him to keep it, if only for the comical juxtaposition.

So, no, you don’t know how to feel about him. Gratitude is a motivating factor but, nowadays, you barely feel anything at all. You certainly don’t feel anything when he takes your cold hand the second time you meet (another mugging foiled) and awkwardly massages it.

“For the circulation,” He growls softly.

You hum and let him massage your hand.

The citizens of Gotham call him “the Batman”, or simply “the Bat”. Sometimes they’ll call him “Vengeance” with a capital V, but nobody answers when you ask why.

You’re not native to Gotham, but you’re not from a city which was its polar opposite either. The gloomy weather and gothic architecture is a welcome reminder of the home you unwillingly left behind.

The third time you meet him, you feel braver than before. “You ever heard of the PJ Masks?” You ask softly, watching as he delivers a harsh blow to an unconscious thug (muggings are very common in Gotham, especially when they can sense that you’re not from here). He glances back at you, his lips pursed and his eyes smeared with dark eyeliner. You wish you could take off the cowl and see his full expression.

“I haven’t,” He says softly. His voice is jarring to listen to. You can tell he’s a man of few words so whenever he speaks, you are enthralled. You don’t know why. What sort of lunatic would be fascinated by a bat vigilante?

Lunatics like you.

“It’s a good show. Reminds me of you,” You say. Your lips don’t curl up in a smile but it’s a near thing. Your feet feel warmer today.

He’s a man who talks little, but he humours you anyway. “Must be good then.” You think you imagine the minute twitch of his lips as he turns away, his fearsome cape dripping with droplets of rain and blood. You watch him go.

Your hands are still cold.

The fourth time you encounter him makes you feel as if he’s started to keep tabs on you specifically. There’s no reason for the fearsome Bat to be lurking outside the 7/11 closest to your little apartment at 2am, but he is there. There’s no thievery to put an end to and no criminals for him to terrify. There is just you and the bright lights of the 7/11 and the jalapeños-and-cheese baked concoction in your hands. Your eyes are glimmering in the artificial light as you break off a piece.

You offer it to him, a small smile playing on your lips. He takes it from you slowly, as if he’s afraid he’ll hurt you. Your feet are cosy and warm tonight. He doesn’t smile back but he does stand next to you all night. Gotham is quiet tonight. It’s a blessing in disguise for you both.

The last time you meet him, you are hurting all over. There is blood sliding down your face and your vision is blurred, but you know it’s him when someone takes your hand. He rubs your hand soothingly.

“For the… circulation… right?” You croak out. It’s hard to talk with chapped lips and broken teeth.

He doesn’t respond. His grip on your hand tightens.

Some upcoming villain in Gotham decided to launch a nefarious attack in the city centre. You were caught in the crossfire, as were many other civilians. But it’s you whom he chooses to comfort, and it’s you whom he clings onto as you fade away.

Your hand goes limp in his grasp. It’s cold.

But there’s a smile on your face and your feet are warm.

[xirayn]

Long distance Stonathan as requested by @fortnightdjo

---

"So when are we going to meet this imaginary boyfriend of yours, Country Club?"

Steve finishes mixing the bloody mary Rosanne Thorne always ends her night with, though the sun will be starting to peek over the New York City skyline by the time Steve gets home. It has been over a year since he started working at The Back Door and the performers have been asking that same question since they learned he was taken.

The drink is garnished with a skewer of cornichons, salami, and cheese kept on hand specifically for nights Rosanne is on stage.

"Once he gets his acceptance letter," Steve answers as he slides the drink over. He goes back to cleaning, smiling to himself at the thought of finally adding the last piece to complete the life he's built for him and Jonathan.

Back in Indiana, Jonathan is attending community college a short drive from Hawkins. Steve understands why. His family might not need him to help pay for bills anymore and Hopper is there to be the 'man of the house', but Jonathan has been too responsible for his family for too long to just leave. So, Steve made an offer: he would be the carrot at the end of the stick and move to New York City while Jonathan earned what credits he could transfer to NYU. If Jonathan still couldn't leave after a few years of seeing his family was alright without him, Steve would move back with life experience beyond a small, midwest town and an interdimensional hellscape.

Rosanne takes a long sip of her drink, considering Steve in a way he got use to sometime back in high school. "Well, if you decide you want a real boy, I called dibs."

Steve chuckles. "You'll be the first to know."

On his walk home, Steve wonders if the crowd and noise will be too much for Jonathan or if he will like the anonymity of being just another face. There is definitely an appeal to it. Safety, as well, since Steve is more concerned about the military or KGB tracking him than he is pickpockets.

There is a padded envelope in his mail. Excitement breaks through his growing fatigue and he practically runs up the three flights of stairs leading to his one bedroom apartment. It's small, but as much as he can afford within a reasonably walking distance of NYU. He calls Jonathan. As the phone rings, he opens the envelope. A groggy voice greets him.

"Don't you have class, Byers?" Steve teases. He presses play before getting a bagel to pop into the toaster. David Bowie croons about changes through the stereo.

"Fuck you, it's Sunday," Jonathan yawns.

"Church, then." The scoff on the other end of the line makes Steve chuckle.

He listens to Jonathan's usual morning grumbles. They talk for a few minutes every few days between Steve going to sleep and Jonathan waking up since long distance calls are expensive. It also allows Steve to check in. Jonathan is likely to skip meals or sleep if not reminded.

"I'd rather love you then be saved," Jonathan says and Steve melts a little. Before can respond, however, the song changes. He recognizes it immediately.

'Start spreading the news, I'm leaving today'

"You got in," he murmurs in realization. Frank Sinatra continues to sing as Steve repeats, louder, "You got in!"

"I did." The sleep has left Jonathan's voice. Steve can picture the amused quirk of his lips and affection in his eyes along with the shy way he ducks his head whenever someone is happy for him. "Do you still have room for me?"

"I think I can find some."

[kairismess]

red velvet cake. (kuroo tetsurou 2023 birthday fic !!)

🏐 genre: a slice of fluff and a ton of birthday gifts!

✒️ word count: 791

💭 summary: kuroo's been so busy lately that he's forgotten why today was so important... you

💗 special mentions: @zdenque @xoxo-cha yang !! (kaso idk what ur @ is UEUEUEU)

🍥 author's note: yung mas masarap siya kaysa sa keyk.

taking off his jacket and loosening his tie, kuroo finally felt like he could take a break for once from all the work he's had to do this week. he slumped down on the sofa, sighing from exhaustion, just wanting to fall asleep, not caring about how he had to do household chores right away. the minute he closed his eyes, however, he felt a couple of cold hands cover them. "chibi-chan, i know you're there." he mumbled tiredly. you giggle in response. "it's a good thing you know, then, tetsu... because i think you were almost about to sleep on the little thing i prepared for you." kuroo raised an eyebrow as he placed his hands on top of yours, feeling the softness of your hands, but noted how sweet they smelled. "did you bake tonight, babe?" he asked you, making you nod. "correct! but the question is... what did i bake?"

kuroo gave a light chuckle at your playfulness and the mystery surprise your had prepared for him. he clicked his tongue and thought hard about what you were making. "hmm... chocolate cake?" "close, but no." "ah, red velvet cake." he was spot on. you sighed and removed your hands from his face, smiling up at him not long after with a slice of red velvet and cream cheese cake on a plate with a red candle lit on it for him. "shoulda known you'd be too sharp to fool you." you mumbled under your breath, pouting a little.

kuroo looked at the cake and back at you with a hint of confusion in his gaze. "what's this... for?" nevermind, he wasn't as sharp as you thought, or maybe this was an effect of him overworking himself. you chuckled and moved closer to him as he looked at the cake with intrigue and a new hunger in his stomach. "it's your birthday, tetsu..." you reminded him, making him blush a little in embarrassment. he smirked, but you could tell he was still flustered beneath that confident aura. "r-right, you remembered...?" "you're my boyfriend, how could i ever forget?" you asked him as he leaned close to you, parting his lips slightly as he wordlessly asked you to spoonfeed him.

"c'mon, babe... please? it's your favorite boy's birthday... it'd make me really happy for you to baby me, just for tonight..." he whispered in your ear, his lips against your earlobe, kissing the space between your cheekbone and ear, smiling against your skin. it sent a shivering sensation up your body, yet a warm, flushed feeling down your shoulders. you decided to give in and fed him yourself, with him happily eating up the piece of cake, and exaggeratedly humming and smiling in approval. "is it good?" you asked him, a little anxious. kuroo looked into your eyes and grinned, placing his thumb on your cheek, rubbing it gently. "it's... it tastes like chocolate cake, but it's got some C18H14N2Na2O8S2 in it, with a whole lot of love. of course it does, it's the best cake i've ever had, love." he mutters, kissing your cheek as you're left stunned by both that word vomit of a chemical formula that he uttered and because of his kiss and compliments.

"i'm not even gonna ask what that means..." "it's the chemical composition for red food dye..." he mumbles, wrapping his arm around you as he lazily cuddles with you on the sofa, mumbling how soft and squishy you feel underneath him. "this is the best birthday ever. thank you, chibi-chan." he thanked you with a tired smile, his joy overshadowing his fatigue, and his smile lighting up the room even more than the dim lights did. you felt yourself get a little shy at his gaze, but you found the strength to nod and smile back, leaning against his chest after setting the plate down on the coffee table.

"and i want it to be the best birthday every year for you..." you declared softly, making kuroo chuckle as he pulled you closer to him. "it always will be, babe; as long as you're with me, it'll always be the best birthday." he reassured you, resting his head against yours, kissing it every now and then as he let the minutes pass by that you're in his arms; relishing in the fact that, even if he's getting older, he'll still love you all the same, maybe even more so with your little gifts, gestures, smiles, and touches that are for him and him alone. kuroo couldn't ask for a better birthday gift than this, because you have always been the perfect gift for him, your love has already made him the happiest man in the world, from now until the very end.

[germhammy]

“Friday Lunch in the Quad”

Xavier: what the hell are you eating, Wednesday? That looks gross

Wednesday: Egg salad sandwich with cheese puffs and a birch beer soda. Enid made it.

Xavier: I hate egg salad

Wednesday: how fortunate for you Enid did not make any for you. And I like egg salad

Enid: why are you here? I am enjoying lunch with my girlfriend

Xavier: savor these last moments of Wednesday as your girlfriend, Enid. After my date tomorrow? She will be mine.

Enid: you seem confident

Xavier: I am. -turning to Wednesday- You haven’t been looking at my texts. So I am here to inform you of details for tomorrow. Meet me by the shuttle pick up at 11am. We shall take the shuttle into Jericho grab a snack. And then I whisk you away on our date

Wednesday: did you check the weather report?

Xavier: ha ha. Very funny.

Enid: why do you constantly feel the need to come over and talk to Wednesday? She is my roommate and my girlfriend and even I do not approach her to talk to her as much as you do

Xavier: because my father says communication is the key to a lasting and meaningful relationship

Wednesday: and your father obviously is an all powerful and knowledgeable psychic who knows everything about me

Xavier: he does know about your family, Wednesday. My godmother was a good friend of your grandmother

Wednesday: that does not mean he or you knows anything about my family. Granny does not live with us. She only visited during my upbringing

Xavier: I still know you better than Enid!

Enid: oh yeah? What’s Wednesday’s favorite color?

Xavier: black obviously

Wednesday: correct. Too easy, Enid.

Enid: I know. Starting off easy. What’s Wednesday’s favorite flower?

Xavier: roses

Enid: black dahlias

Wednesday: Enid is correct

Enid: what’s the name of Wednesday’s favorite relative? And what is their relation?

Xavier: Morticia, her mother

Enid: Fester. Her Uncle

Wednesday: Enid is correct

Xavier: oh come on!!

Enid: name one of the Addams family pets

Xavier: Cleopatra

Enid: Kitty Kat

Wednesday: my mother would be insulted as would Cleopatra that you referred to her as a pet. She is a plant and more like my mother’s child in her eyes. Kitty Kat is correct

Xavier: these aren’t fair questions!

Wednesday: why are they not? If you know me so well? Enid. Please continue. I wish to know how observant you are

Enid: what kind of typewriter does Wednesday use?

Xavier: it’s just a cobbled together piece of shit. I’m surprised it even works.

Enid: wow, Xavier. Way to insult a writer and her preferred means of creativity. Wednesday uses a 1941 Juwel Model 3

Wednesday: I am impressed, Enid.

Xavier: you are just saying Enid is right to make me look bad!

Wednesday: are you accusing me of lying?

Xavier: I would never!

Wednesday: then Enid is correct about my typewriter. And it is insulting that you call my beloved typewriter a cobbled together piece of shit

Enid: Wednesday has written 4 novels. Unless you completed one during break?

Wednesday: I did start writing a new novel. I had to pause in order to do editing and consulting.

Enid: what genre does Wednesday write and what is the name of her main protagonist?

Xavier: horror obviously. And she’s never shared her work with anyone so how do we know if it’s even good! Or what the main character’s name is.

Enid: mystery horror actually. Her protagonist is ‘Viper de La Meurte’ And as for knowing? If you are so incredibly knowledgeable about Wednesday? The news broke today officially actually. Netflix is making a horror series. One of Wednesday’s stories is being used for an episode! They also mention her soon to be published horror mystery novel featuring Viper de La Muerte, teenage detective

Wednesday: oh? The official announcement was made today?

Enid: about the series itself. No details

Wednesday: Ah. They have begun casting my episode.

Xavier: no way! You’ve written a Netflix series? What is it called?

Wednesday: not a series. Do you even listen? One of my stories is being adapted as an episode. The series is called “Tales from the other sides” The first season will consist of 10 episodes. My episode is currently in casting. It will air as episode 9 or 10

Enid: can we return to our lunch? You will have all day with Wednesday tomorrow

Wednesday: indeed. And why do you need me to be ready at eleven? I thought this was a dinner date? Not a day trip

Xavier: I am taking you out to dinner. To some place special! So dress nicely. Not your usual frumpy outfits, okay?

Wednesday said nothing. Xavier walked away.

Enid: wow. Walking away with the double insult, one probably unintended

Wednesday: double?

Enid: calling your outfits ‘frumpy’ for one. Not knowing your mother’s name is Frump so insulting her as well. I love your mother’s style, by the way.

Wednesday: I just do not understand why he thinks he is so smooth. Are you going to all right hanging with Lucas and his friends?

Enid: yeah. Jonah and Carter are okay when it’s just me. Werewolves are cool I guess. They get uneasy when I’m with Ajax. Having snakes for hair that can turn you to stone is creepy. I’ll probably hang out at Pilgrim World until the game starts

[luuvprincess]

Deacon Kay 🏌🏽‍♀️ (3)

Summary: Desiree stops by HQ for a visit

Warning: SMUT ⚠️‼️ (public sex)

Words: 920

Please excuse any mistakes 🫠

3rd Perosn prospective

Desiree walked into HQ. She knew deacon was gonna be here for a while and her brother. So she decided to stop by with some dinner.

Bake Mac and cheese, steak ,collard greens and white rice with gravy.

"Look who showed up." Hondo said with a huge smile happy to see his little sister. "Well what do we have here?" He asked.

"I figured since you guys would be here all night I bring dinner so nobody has any excuse to miss dinner." Desiree tells him. He leads her to kitchen on the way there Deacon spots them while he's talking to a recruit.

"Hey good work today Harlow." Deacon says as he shakes the young girl hand.

"Thank you Sergeant Kay." She says then they walk their separate ways. Deacon caught up Desiree and Hondo.

"Hey what are you doing here?" Deac asked walking over to his girlfriend of 3 years."Hey I was just stopping by I brought everyone dinner." Des tells him with a smile.

"Imma go ahead and leave you two lovebirds thank you again Des for the food. Deac I'll come get you if we get anything." Hondo says before leaving the room leaving the couple alone.

Desiree bite down on her lip as she eyes her boyfriend. She always loved the way he looked in uniform the way his black swat compression shirt hugged his muscular muscles.

"I want you." Desiree said as she grabbed onto his belt pulling him close. "Sergeant." She wishpered in his ear.

"I hate to break it to you my love but I'm on call." He says. She pouted kissed him softly on the lips. "Please Sergeant Kay. Isn't it your job to help a civilian." She said trying to seduce him.

"I-no I could get into serious trouble not only with the commander but also with your brother." He says.

"David lift up my dress right now and tell if your really gonna deny this piece of art." Desiree said. Deacon shook his head stepping back a little.

"Honey no I'm not taking that risk of someone walking in here and seeing what's mines." He said.

"What if I want to take that risk?" She asked slightly her head to side slightly. "I want you and I want you now not later when your home tomorrow right now." She demanded rubbing on his bulging print.

"Come on baby let me take care of you." She says giving him the puppy eyes. She kissed him as she unzipped his pants slipping her hand into his jeans and rubbing on his hard dick. He let out a small grunt allowing her to continue.

"Hey Deac we got hit on a suspect we're rolling in 30." Hondo called out causing the two to pull away.

"Roger that." Deacon said clearing his throat at his fixed his zipper. Desiree continued to look at Deacon with lust in her eyes. She was ready to risk it all.

"I only need 10 ." She said as she got low in front of him and unzipped his pants she wasted no time and pulled his dick.

"De-fuck." He moaned as he felt her wet lips wrapped around his tip. Taking as much of him as she could down her throat bopping her head slowly as she stroaked what didn't fit.

She pulled away making a pop noise in the process she jerked him off sucking on his balls and kissing on the base of his cock.

"Oh fuck Desiree shit." He moaned as he looked down at her. She was staring him in the eyes. She pulled away leaving soft kisses from his balls to his tip.

Eventually Deacon had enough of her teasing and yanked her up and bent over the counter . Desiree let out a soft moan happy that she finally got what she wanted.

Deacon pulled her dress up her body and her black lace thongs down her thick brown thighs. He looked down seeing how wet she was just for him he stroked his cock a few times before he slide in.

"Fuck Deac yess." Desiree moaned quiet as she possibly could.

"If we weren't in public right now I'd have you screaming." Deacon says in her ear as he picks up his pace with his strokes.

"Ahh Deac right there baby. Yes fuck this pussy up."  She moaned as deacon hit the right spot. He grabbed onto the back of her neck pulling her back his chest.

"Who does this pussy belong too Desiree?" Deacon asked. "Mmm fuck ahh David I'm close." She moaned. Deacon smacked her ass fucking her hard Desiree gasped gripping tightly onto the counter. "Answer my question first then you can cum." He demanded.

"It's yours Deac fuck baby please let me cum." She moaned. He groaned feeling himself also close to his high.

"Come with me gorgeous." He said placing a kiss on her shoulder. Desiree eyes shut tight as she came hard over his cock. He then came after her pulling out and finishing in her thongs.

"That was so much fun we should definitely do that again." She said as she pulled her panites back up her thighs she fixed her dress as he fixed his pants.

"I love you I'll see you at home." He said kissing her "I love you Sergeant Kay be safe." She smiled into the kiss watching him walk out the door.

I have no words for this one y'all 😭

I hope y'all enjoyed this one

[yelenasdiary]

Hey, I saw you wanted ppl to request some drabbles, and if that was something you still wanted, how about yn works in retail, but in a store that has the only brand of mac and cheese yelena likes, so finding out its sold out, but not wanting to see this attractive woman sad, yn asks for her details so she can call when they get some in. Which in turn she keeps the whole stock that comes in and calls yelena, and yelena wanting to thank her by asking her out. Bonus for a Fanny cameo? is this okay?

Drabble || Just For You

Pairing: Yelena Belova x Reader (Platonic)

Summary: When a new customer quickly becomes a regular to buying out as many boxes of the store's Mac n Cheese has you intrigued so when the store has none left, the blonde is disappointed she'll miss out on her favourite snack, until you assure her that next stock is all hers.

Fluff

Warnings: None, this isn't corrected or proof read. | 1K

AC: I love this so much!! Thank you for sending it!! I hope you enjoy this x

You saw the disappointment on her face as she made her way towards you at the check-out. You greeted her with a soft smile when she placed her items down.

"Hi, how are you today?" you asked as you grabbed one of the cans of dog food and scanned it. The woman sighed, "I see you're out of Mac n cheese" she replied.

"Yeah, unfortunately we sold the last few boxes in the lunch rush" you said, scanning her next item and placing it into a paper bag for her. The blonde comes in every few weeks and likes to buy at least eight boxes of Mac n cheese, it was very clear it was one of her favourite meals and the sadness on her face told you she was really looking forward to ending her day with a bowl of her favourite food.

"But, hey, I tell you what. I've seen you in here a few times so why don't you leave your name and number and when our stock delivery arrives in a few days I'll make sure you're the first person to get their hands on it" you added.

The green eyed woman's face lit up, she smiled, "You'd do that? for me?" she said, her Russian accent coming in thick.

"Of course. You're like the only person I have ever seen that buys more than two boxes of it" you replied making the two of you to chuckle before you handed her a piece of scrap paper and a pen. She wrote down her details while you scanned the rest of her items.

"That'll be $15.68" you smiled once more as she handed you back the paper and pen, "Yelena" you read, looking up at her.

"Y/n" she replied, looking at your name badge, you chuckled, "It's finally nice to put a name to such a beautiful face" you said. Your compliment took Yelena back for a moment, "well, it's not every day a beautiful check out worker wants to take my name and number" she replied, her cheeks slightly red. She paid for her items and thanked you for being so kind.

----

"Y/n, could you please more the new stock so it's ready for stacking" your manager asked just as you finished up checking out the last customer in your line. "Sure, I just need a quick toilet break first" you replied before making your way to the employee bathroom.

You pulled out the piece of paper Yelena wrote her name and number down on and began to punch in her number into your phone. It rang a few times before you were greeted with her thick Russian accent.

"Yelena speaking" she answered.

"Hi, Yelena, it's Y/n. We got our stock in today and I am about to get it ready for stacking. If you're free, did you want to come down and pick up the boxes?"

"Hey, of course! Fanny and I are just on our daily walk, we'll be there in 10 minutes or so"

"Sounds awesome, please tell me Fanny is your dog" you chuckled.

"What else would I be walking?" Yelena replied, "we'll see you soon" she added before hanging up.

You had just finished up stacking a product when you saw Yelena walking towards you, "You made it" you smiled, unsure why you even made that comment. She smiled softly, "yeah, you should've seen the crap I had to put up with before walking through the door" she chuckled, making you blush.

"You must be pretty hungry then" you replied, "I've saved you a few boxes, come with me" you added. Yelena couldn't help but noticed the newly stocked section of Mac n cheese that reminded her how excited she was to finally get her hands on her favourite snack. You led her into the backroom, the manger was on lunch so you knew you were safe.

"So, I'm not sure if you have a car or anything but by box, I mean I saved you a whole crate" you turned on your heels, smiling at the blonde. Yelena's eyes widened, "you saved me a whole crate?" she asked, just to be sure.

"Yeah! I may or may not have noticed how much you like this brand and considering we are the one of the only stores that sell it in the city, I thought why not give you enough to keep you going! Oh, and you'd be saving money" you replied excitingly.

Yelena's smile only grew bigger, "I guess I'll have to call my sister, I don't think Fanny will approve of pulling this bad boy home" she replied with a chuckle.

----

A few days had past and you were just about to clock out, serving the last customer in your checkout when Yelena had walked in. "I didn't think I'd see you back here so soon" you greeted her with a smile as you began to tidy up your check out.

Yelena chuckled, "don't worry, I'm not here for more Mac n cheese" she replied.

"I'm glad! I would be a little concerned if you were! What can I help you with?" You asked.

"Are you busy after your shift?" she asked. You shook your head, "nope, just going home and hitting the gym a little later" you replied.

"How do you feel about skipping gym and maybe having dinner with me?" Yelena asked. You paused and looked up at her, smiling softly, "I've skipped the gym for the last three days, what's another day going to do?" you replied, causing Yelena to smile.

"Great! I'll let you finish up and I'll meet you outside with Fanny" she spoke before slowly walking towards the entrance.

Once you had finished tidying up and gathering your things from your locker, you met Yelena outside where she waited with her dog, Fanny, sitting by her feet. The dog wagged her tail as she greeted you, "she's adorable! what's her name again?" you asked, giving the pup at good pat.

"Fanny" Yelena replied, you didn't question the slightly odd name choice. "How do you feel about loaded hot dogs and a walk through the park?" Yelena asked.

"This is going to sound a little odd but I have been craving one of them all day!" you smiled.

Taglist: @marvelfan98 | @boredandneedfanfics | @music-4ever | @marvelwomen-simp | @swaqcenix | @scarlettbitchx | @mallyka-blog | @itsalwaysskorpioszn | @caporal-nino | @natashamaximoff-69 | @evilcr0ne | @boredandneedfanfics | @teganmiller | @ihavezeroclue13 | @tobiaslut | @itsmelulu | 

If you want to be on the taglist for my work, please click HERE.

[stemgirlchic]

secret spy mission for when you're not okay

broken into "really really not okay" "really not okay" and "not okay"

really really not okay: mission stay safe

make sure you're in a safe place

hug your pillow, get under your blankets, anything that can be a little bit of comfort

if you're watching/reading/otherwise consuming something that's triggering you, put it away. or at least put it down for a moment. even if it's your work, even if it's an important news story that deserves your attention, it's okay. there will be other times to interact with it

if you're having bad impulses - rip a piece of paper, hit something soft, hell even throw something (preferably not something expensive but anything is better than hurting yourself or someone else)

deep breaths. i know it's cliche but it helps

ground yourself: 3 things you see, 2 things you hear, 1 think you feel.

really not okay: mission stabilize (pick 1-2 of these mission objectives)

watch funny videos online (i like SNL and clips from the office)

read a chapter of that book you set aside

if you can, get some fresh air, whether that's a short walk or just opening a window

if you're up for it, exercise can help, even just some stretching

work out your feelings creatively: draw, write angsty teenage poetry, sing a ballad in the shower, anything. we are creative creatures.

listen to some music - my friends all like listening to sad music when they're upset, but i find happy music helps. whatever works for you.

text/call/chat with someone you care about, even if it's unrelated to how you're feeling rn. just a meme or an emoji even, remind yourself you are loved.

not okay: mission small steps

get yourself some water

get a snack - it doesn't have to be complicated. a piece of fruit, some cheese and crackers, some chips, popcorn, pretzels, leftovers from last night. don't feel bad. this is productive. you are being productive. this is what you need rn.

turn on some chill music

make a list of the things you have to do - "must do today or there will be severe consequences", "should probably do today", "don't have to do today"

put aside the "don't have to do today". it's okay. there will be other days, better days. dramatically rip off that part of your to-do list, crumble it up, and throw it in the nearest trash can basketball star style.

start with your must dos. work for 15 minutes, then take a 5 minute break. if you can't do 15 minutes straight, do whatever time amount you can do. slow progress is still progress. i'm so proud of you.

take a nice, rewarding break after your must dos. you deserve it. then - reassess. are you up for your "should dos"? if so, repeat the last bullet point with them. if not, that's okay. there will be other days.

you did it. i'm so proud of you. one day you will look back on today and think "wow, i was so strong for getting through that. i can't believe i got through that" and you will be right. because you are so strong. ily <3 you are the best spy ever.

[readychilledwine]

Little Bat, Big Dreams

A/N- *tv static noise and announcer voice* we now interrupt your regularly scheduled smut for an adorable Nyx piece to satisfy Readychilledwine's pregnant brain. I present to you all a Kaylee (the previously introduced archeron oc) and toddler Nyx piece. Hopefully, you all enjoy this little family dinner piece as much as my brain enjoyed writing it, and hopefully, it helps ease any ill feelings on if Kaylee is okay at the end of Bound by Fate. 💜 Happy 5th day of "Here's to 100"

Summary - Of the four Archeron sisters, Kaylee had always had the easiest time with children due to her work in the healing house. Now, those skills are being tested by her own nephew as he takes on his worst known enemy, vegetables.

Warnings - food aversion, food allergy reactions are briefly mentioned but not described (no use of the phrase "water bowels" here, sorry Sarah.)

Feyre and Kaylee shared a look as Nyx pouted about the vegetables his family was trying to force him to eat. This was the third attempt today in making the little heir eat a well-rounded meal. This time, they had tried drowning the vegetables in cheese and withholding any other food until he ate those first.

Kaylee sighed, finally breaking the tense silence at the table, "So, you don't like veggies ooooorrr?"

Rhysand chuckled as Nyx looked up at his favorite aunt. His little blue eyes were soft with admiration for her despite Azriel's joking, yet not, warnings that she was spoken for. Her perfectly arched brow was raised at her nephew. "They're gross," he answered softly. "I hate them."

"Hate is a strong word," Nesta said from next to the boy. "It requires previous emotions like love." She wiggled her shoulder at Nyx, causing him to start dramatically gagging at the idea of romance and adult feelings.

"Auntie Kay-Kay isn't eating vegetables. If she doesn't have to. I don't neither." All heads at the table turned to her as she and Feyre made eye contact.

Before becoming fae, Kaylee had always had issues eating dairy products. Cheese, ice creams, chocolates, and milk had all tended to make her very sick. She had not bothered trying to eat them after being made. Not worth the risk, she had told Rhysand quietly one night as she explained what happened to her.

She held her plate silently to her mate, and Azriel tugged the bond gently. Are you sure? Rhysand came into her mind softly. I really appreciate you doing this, but you do not have to.

The youngest Archeron continued her stare off as Azriel put a small serving of the vegetables on her plate. I'm sure. Just buy me something pretty if this makes me sick in return. Rhysand chuckled softly as the toddler and his aunt both leaned forward, maintaining eye contact.

"Oh shit, it's getting serious," Cassian leaned back in his chair, tapping Lucien's shoulder to get the other male's attention. The Autumn male and Elain instantly looked over, laughing at the two youngest beings at the table.

"If I eat all of these, you have to eat all of yours. Once you eat all of yours, Uncle Az will take you flying today and go to the bakery we all love with you. If you don't finish them, though, he's taking me instead. Deal?"

They all watched as Nyx weighed his options. The gross vegetables covered in his favorite cheese, or not getting to fly with Uncle Az and losing out on the oh so famous triple chocolate fudge brownies the bakery had, "Deal." Kaylee and Nyx maintained eye contact as they picked up the first bite. A silent game took place between the little bat and the auntie.

Nyx put the cheesy greens in his mouth at the same time as her, eyes going wide as he chewed. He broke the game, looking down at his plate in wonder before picking up a bigger bite and eating it. And then another and another. Kaylee shook her head, looking at Feyre and Rhysand, Works every time. She kept her end of the deal, eating her serving of veggies as Rhys and Azriel watched with concern.

Nyx finished his first, smiling at his empty plate. "Not bad, huh?" She smiled at him as he held his hand out for her fork. "Evidently not." She handed Nyx her fork, allowing him the last bite of cheese and broccoli, and watched him with a soft smile. "Was it as gross as you thought, little bat?"

The Illyrians chuckled at the nickname as Nyx shook his head. "They were yummy." Kaylee nodded. "Why weren't you going to eat them if you knew they were yummy?"

"You remember how mommy and your aunties were made and not born fae, right?" Nyx nodded at her. "When I was human, milk made me really sick, and I haven't tried to eat it since."

Nyx looked up at her, his eyes wide as his lower lip began to tremble. "So, you'll get sick because of me?"

Kaylee chuckled softly. "No, buddy, if I get sick, I'm going to get sick because of the cheese. Not because of you. You needed encouragement because you were scared, right?"

Nyx nodded. "They're just gross looking. Like little mutant trees."

"But now you like them? So we never have to do that again?" The Little bat nodded at his smiling aunt. "Then, if i feel icky later, me having an unhappy tummy for a few hours is worth every second since you'll eat your vegetables now and grow big and strong."

"Like Uncle Cassie?!"

Kaylee nodded as Azriel's hand found hers under the table. "Exactly like Uncle Cassie."

Nyx held his plate out to Azriel who took it with a smile, adding another serving of veggies to his plate and setting it back down in front of him. "I'm going to beat up Uncle Cassian some day," Nyx began to eat his second serving of vegetables with determination, his eyes glancing towards Cassian with a slight glare every so often.

Wonderful. Any ideas on how to get him to eat meat other than chicken strips? Rhysand smiled.

I have a few. Kaylee leaned her head on Azriel's shoulder. The two mates were silently communicating. Kaylee's bright blue eyes flickered towards Cassian, cutting his steak and then back to Nyx. She rose both of her brows at Azriel quickly, and the male discretely nodded. Rhysand smiled lightly, shaking his head. The two of them had quickly developed their own language, and it was something the High Lord both envied and adored for his brother.

They all were now watching as Nyx and Cassian had a stare off. Cassian continued to eat his steak with a small smirk. He knew his nephew was still sad over the small battle the two of them had just hours ago. "You know Nyx," Azriel started slowly. "Part of why Uncle Cass is so big is due to him eating a variety of food. Different foods help our bodies with different things. That steak he's eating helps his muscles stay big and strong. Maybe we should try that sometime too, huh?"

Nyx glared at Cassian. The goal of beating him in a fight someday was the only thing driving him after losing in their wooden sword fight, and Azriel knew that. Cassian rose his brows in challenge, staring at Nyx as he took another bite of his steak. Nyx glared harder before turning to his father, "Cut me a steak, daddy."