#BECAUSE EVERYTHING SUCKS RIGHT NOW
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Life really is crazy sometimes huh
#like last night i nearly jumped off a bridge because turns out! cost of living is too high#and i literally could not afford food for a week so i have been eating 1 meal a day and then#my car broke down!!!#so fuck my life!#but i went to a friends going away drinks at the pub#and then couldnt afford to uber home/PT would take too long so i walked#and the walk took me across a bridge that i genuinely was like hmm. i should just jump off this now. its peaceful. quiet. good timing#ANYWAY i decided that was stupid and just walked the rest of the 4km home#and then tonight???? my pole teacher told me im rlly strong and have a really flexible back#which is Crazy ive never really been complemented on my physical abilities#and she was like oh youre really strong to be able to do that#and im like WHAT#im not strong im just a background guy#i guess my point is. dont jump off a bridge because maybe you are steong and have a flexible back#just walk home and go to bed and try to keep living in the morning#EVEN WHEN IT FUCKING SUCKS#BECAUSE EVERYTHING SUCKS RIGHT NOW#but at least i am stronger than i thought and i have a flexible back#personal#about me#my stuff#im so tired but theres a life update for yall
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if i just told you i love you would this world change
#witch hat tag#orufrey#these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!!#i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was#some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that#like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god#aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it#ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE!#tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood.#Why do you keep pulling away from me?#It is because i love you that i do this#the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings#“あなたが知らない私を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want#to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“#oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you#maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me#i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life#until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to#NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!!#........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*
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day before a 5 day holiday weekend. office empty. got me thinking thoughts.
#thinking about raupi kaur hollie mcnish and the movment of populist poetry#how all media is populist right now and it’s no surprise its happening in a time of economic uncertainty AND a devaluation of art in society#not to mention a rise in anti intellectualism#thinking about how fanfiction is no longer a practice for writing but more an opportunity to get likes and reblogs#every day I see posts about how authors feel pressured to write for a specific character because all others are ignored#to you I say the mass market appeal is NOT worth you writing something you don’t care about#your audience of 20 will be more endeared to you BECAUSE you are feeding their niche#thinking about the inherent dichotomy between art and money because once you create for the common denominator you lose something#look at marvel movies - hell the state of movies in general: ZERO intellectual curiosity#everything is made to be consumed by the most amount of people#and it SUCKS ITS FUCKING GARBAGE#art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable#if everyone finds your work palatable then it’s not art it’s content to consume#RANT OVER#… or for the next 20 minutes until I get another thing to Think About
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All That's Left follows two journalists and their friends in post-apocalyptic United States as they travel from the fallen east coast megalopolis Opportunity back to Los Angeles, crossing through a harsh wasteland overrun with zombies— only to find out that there is a lot more life left than what the protected cities want them to believe. On their journey they meet dozens of people living their lives as peaceful as possible away from military forces, corporations, and corrupt governments; and they learn that the same mutated ghouls that took down Opportunity are spreading rapidly through the country, destroying everything in their path. Will this finally be the end of the world as we know it?
taglist (opt in/out)
@shellibisshe, @florbelles, @ncytiri, @hibernationsuit, @stars-of-the-heart;
@vvanessaives, @katsigian, @radioactiveshitstorm, @estevnys, @adelaidedrubman;
@celticwoman, @rindemption, @carlosoliveiraa, @noirapocalypto, @dickytwister;
@killerspinal, @euryalex, @ri-a-rose, @velocitic, @thedeadthree
#all that's left#edit:misc#nuclearedits#so um. hi. this is an original story i've been working on since 2016 and i love it so so much. sorry#it's not a tv show but i would love for it to be a tv show do you understand. my vision. are you seeing the vibes of this#it's BRIGHT. it's COLORFUL. it's FUN. there's so many cool characters and it's focused a lot on like#the connections between the main characters and all that#mac and layla (the journalists) go from having to write about this megalopolis which. if anything is just. a city version of a nepo baby#to writing about the people who are still living out there who are being completely overlooked by the safe cities and everything#everything really is not that bad out there!! in fact all of the misery that IS still in the wasteland is created specifically by like#the safe cities who keep snatching away supply drops from people who need it etc etc. and governments pretending that#there's no smaller settlements out there anymore and all that#and also there's zombies. ghouls. i call them ghouls but they have many funky names across the whole world in this universe#anyway yeah there's a lot more to this universe already because well 8 years in the making LMAO so i have another edit incoming#for the fictional season 2. aka book 2. yes there's a book 2. there's also a book 3 and 4. sorry for being insane#the linked playlists has songs for book 1-3 right now :]#if you have any questions PLEAAASSEEEE send me asks. preferably asks and not dms because tumblr dms suck ass#but i would love to talk more about this :^)
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I am exhausted, good heavens.
#hey watch this neat trick I can do [cries]#love that for me#BUT#BUT- the actual EFFORT I put these days to not make a suicide jokes is *chefs kiss* phenomenal#actively shitting bricks as I physically have to stop myself from saying I want a car to hit me for the 50th time that day#I am not progressing any more than I am downgressing or whatever the opposite word is. but girlies#and boysies and peepsies#my lipgloss is popping and my eyebags are gucci- and so I shall prevail#MAN this tiredness is BONE DEEP man- it's like it's engraved into my goddamn clavicles#sorry that was like the only bone name I could remember- I don't even know what a clavicle is#anyways- I need to fall asleep forever and never wake up. But not in like a dying way#I just need to stop waking up tired and being tired and going to sleep tired and living tired like GIRL#WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN SLEEP STOPS SLEEPING#I JUST SLEPT 10 HOURS HOW ARE YOU STILL TIRED#I am so tired that i stopped liking shit- like that SUCKS my dudes#I sometimes Don't Like art now and that is WILD to me because that was lowkey the One Thing that got me going#I used to actually LIKE english class! and reading Shakespear and shit!!!! and history class!! Now I don't!! Where did the spark go??????#Now everything feels like a chooooooore and it sucks major dick#and my graaaades are slipping because I stopped giving a damn but I NEED. TO. GIVE. A. DAMN#because those are like highkey lowkey and every-other-key my grades and I need them to go into uni so I don't die <333#I need to spite little mini me who said I wasn't going to live past 13 because BITCH- guess how old I'm turning next week????????#THAT'S RIGHT- 17 YEARS OLD- FUCK YEAH BABY I'M STILL NOT DEAD#SUCK MY BIG ASS SHLONG MINI-ME#and then I have a big biology exam the day after so- funnnnn!!#anywho- should I tag this as vent? this probably counts as vent right? like among us? impostor and shit?#sorry I think my brain is actively rotting out of my ears right now#vent post#personal vent#tw vent#tw sui talk
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can i pay extra for a phone NOT to have ai
#i actually love my phone and do not want to upgrade it#but.#i may be won over by camera features because mine kind of sucks#especially since i am kind of planning on a northern lights trip#and my phone straight up does not really have the necessary functions to photograph it#i'd like to have like. more than one option right?#if my dlsr and tripod fail?#or be able to take phone pics if i have the dslr set up for a timelapse or something? or vice versa#anyway#getting tired of every single ad being AI IS HERE NOW BUY THIS PHONE FOR AI#(cough. samsung and their galaxy AI plastered over everything)
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I'm not trying to be rude but why do you care if minors interact with your blog? From what I can see you don't write smut exclusively, and I thought creators want more people to read their posts?
you may not be trying to be rude anon, but you're certainly skirting the line with this ask. i'm going to try to address this as clearly and as calmly as possible.
firstly, i don't want minors interacting with me in online spaces because i'm an adult. i have been a teenager in online spaces, i grew up with being warned about internet safety and the likelihood of interacting with adults that may not have my best interests at heart online. i am friends with people irl who were groomed online.
i am also friends with someone irl who thought they were talking to another adult in an adult only space only to find out that the person they were talking to (and engaging in flirtatious conversation with) lied about their age. i witnessed first hand as this person contemplated ending their life because the child threatened to "leak" their conversations and called them a paedophile. i witnessed first hand the shame and fear this person lived with even as they went to the police of their own free will to clear their name.
secondly, i shouldn't have to write smut exclusively to want minors to avoid interacting with my blog. i don't want to interact with minors therefore i shouldn't have to interact with minors. that's it. no further discussion should be necessary.
however, for whatever godawful fucking reason, these children continue to launch themselves into my ask box or my friends ask boxes throwing temper tantrums or being passive aggressive cunts all because an adult said no. it reeks of piss poor parenting, of entitlement and of a blatant disregard for their own safety. i am not your guardian or parental figure. i am a stranger on the internet that is saying no for your safety and for mine. practice what you fucking preach when you reblog endless posts supporting the message of "no means no".
and finally, i don't want just anyone interacting with my blog and my posts. i want adults to interact with my blog because i am an adult. i cannot stop minors from reading my blog but i can stop them from interacting with my blog and by extension me.
have a good day.
#pfh answers#tw grooming mention#tw suicide mention#i am really pissed off right now anon because this whole situation is a complete shower of shit#the fact that i am spending my precious time and energy responding to this instead of working on the wedding guest!gaz fic is -#- frustrating to say the least and actively sucking the joy out of writing for this fandom for me#since last night i have been contemplating cross posting everything over to ao3 and orphaning it because i am sick and tired of this
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knowing communication is vital to a healthy relationship but never knowing how to start a conversation or holding back because you don't want to burden them with your emotions or say/do something that will push them away and just generally being socially inadept is such a fun time! :)
#i was so content being single why did i sign up for this again?#i like this person so much and i'm already so attached#and they've reassured me that they want to be with me also#but things are going so fucking slow and i think right now they have to#because of their mental state and things they are just trying to figure out about themselves and what they want#and i just want to be there for them through it and help them sort things out#but i guess some of the issue is they are mourning a relationship that they wanted but that didn't get to happen#but that apparently after we basically established yeah let's be a thing the other person reached in hopes they could meet each other#which like they told me it's more an issue now of letting the other person down easy and let them know they found a person to be with#but i'm just not coping with this knowledge very well at all#despite the reassurance from them that i'm the one they wanna be with#and i think i'm struggling because i'm probably jealous because they are friends and have been for years#and i don't want to be jealous i just wanna be chill about it#like i'm not going to be the person who makes them feel like they can't maintain their long term friendships#i won't be that person#but it makes me feel insecure like i'm competing against someone i don't even know#and i worry they're going to realize i just fucking suck and decide that to leave me to try something with that person instead#but i don't know how to even start a conversation or convey these feelings to them without fearing it's going to start some bullshit#that i don't want tainting the relationship#even outside of that like#i wanna know so many things about them but i don't even know where to start or if i can just ask them questions#everything scares me relationships are scary#i'm so fucking scared of being hurt again#ugh#personal#sorry i just needed to dump this somewhere because i've been bottling it up for a fucking week now#it did not make me feel better but at least i got the words out
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as a chinese person yall need to stop blaming the ccp for everything (read: hoyo is capable of making colorist design decisions and not everything is a result of censorship pls)
#the govt is v racist while also doing like a lot of rlly questionable economic exploits but also: as a company hoyo can suck#please read what china actually censors and what historical nihilism covers#also: sumeru proves that a) they can make brown people b) the '''race'' dynamics were literally crucial to the plot#it was *intentional* that the rainforest region designs were pale and the desert designs were (a rather laughable) tanned because it added#to the colorism plot they tried weaving into the academic and knowledge inequality plot#so i think it's also gonna be intentional that the natlan designs are pale like they're not fucking fools#open at will: hater behavior#also: you fail to consider that mandatory (for cn server) skins for old 1.x characters got released bc they decided they were too revealing#however neither kaeya nor xinyan's skintones got changed; sumeru released as normal#literally based on what's been changed: the only thing hoyo seems to be out of line with right now is excessive cleavage on some fem chars#i dont think the skin tone censorship is the real issue. maybe the company is just. a product of the colorism and biases#in china/asia as a whole#it's not 'oh ccp censored them' maybe their skin tones are just colorist#this is technically a ''''subtweet'''' as they say but it's also: bro ccp is not the end all be all bogeyman#also idc if you are from the cultures that genshin tries repping in game but gets skin tone godawfully wrong idc you have the right to ask#for more from them and call them out for colorism! it's a societal thing yeah but they can also do so much better#edit: another thing about this is like: yall are literally infantalizing chinese ppl like do u think cn people can't be racist of tehir own#free will?? the government is the only thing forcing them to be racist?? get a grip. not everything is because of the ccp oh my fucking god
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like why did they change where Vegeta was when Cell announced the cell games in the anime
why did they make this vegeta starting shit with yamcha instead of chillin in the lab with his family? why did they take Bulma out of the lab? Why'd they say she was Out while Dr Brief was repairing 16? Why did they change Bulma working on advanced robotics to running in late with her baby?
it's the same scene except: - Bulma's actively at work being a scientist - Vegeta's not being rude to her (or anyone else!) - Vegeta waits for Trunks instead of leaving the room - Cell interrupted the airwaves, which means Trunks and Vegeta were just hanging out with Bulma and Dr B while they were working
Those are all Great Character Details!! That the anime rails against!!
#these cowards afraid of showing Vegeta actively choosing to be around his wife and child even when he's Bad#Because Goku who is Good never ever even once makes that choice onscreen outside of filler#and then they justify that choice by making Chi-Chi seem horrid and unreasonable for (checks notes) Not Wanting Her Child to Die#anyway I am once again being bitter about anime vs manga klasjdklasd#I can't believe I let the anime convince me I hated Goku man Goku's SUCH a good and ridiculous character in the manga#the anime just SUCKS at letting him be who he's always been#and has to reframe and recontextualize and reword everything he does so that it seems like he's Actually Quite Mature and Thoughtful nO#THAT's VEGETA YOU COWARDS#also the fact that bulma said she wouldn't live with him at the beginning of this arc to him casually hanging out with her and trunks#after cell beat his ass and humbled him is REALLY GOOD SUBTEXT for their shared relationship having improved without showing it#it's great subtext for all three of them and toei just went 'nah' and decided to make it a whole group shot so ...? Master Roshi could sit#and explain how ??? Tournaments Work??? Just so Cell could log on and also explain how tournaments work?? God it's been so long#since I've watched the anime and now when I do it just makes me mad aklsdjskja the manga is SOOOOO much better#there are some spots where the pacing is more ideal in the anime like goku turning ssj for the first time but like man. everything else is.#like why are you making Goku snarky with Vegeta dude his clapbacks are SO much funnier when they're just Tactless Honesty#like Vegeta's not insulted by Snark bitch he grew up in the Freeza force that man was raised by THE bitchiest drag queens#Vegeta's insulted by someone saying something deeply and insultingly True to his face as if it's the fucking weather#Goku in the anime is like 'a battle of wits hoho' but Goku's purity is part of the joke he's not snippy he's just got no social etiquette#He's just honest! He's not trying to be insulting. That's what MAKES it insulting! That's the WHOLE GAG of why Vegeta can't stand him#Goku is always just telling the truth and it's always the rudest shit Vegeta's ever heard in his life#'it's a sunny day! i'm way stronger than you! see you out there bud!' 10000% Genuinely Friendly. Golden Retriever-Ass Pure.#Infuriating. Hilarious.#anyway I looked at anime clips to make sure I remembered things right and that was a mistake#as someone who has a soft spot for it and grew up on it -- compared to the manga it's bad and it's always been bad#and toriyama was right to be disinterested in watching it jesus christ they BUTCHERED his work#anyway this has been another shot of haterade with sketches thank you for scrolling my rambletags askljdask#dbtag#i just truly can't get over how they make Vegeta call her 'woman' in the anime and he literally only ever calls her Bulma in the manga#except for on namek when he refers to her as 'the/that woman' because she is a complete stranger#why is he calling her woman like he's a 1940s american husband and not an extraterrestrial from a deeply advanced society toei
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Hi, I would love to ask more in the "ask blog", I just need to know, what are the current events that are going on?
Are they still on the plot on St Valentin, or is the theme with Harry the main conflict?
the main theme in the blog is whatever you ask about ! that do be how it works
#sci speaks#sighs. I don’t know if I have the energy to remind people how it works. maybe I want to let it die.#the whole point of an ask blog is that the asks steer it. i'm not meant to steer everything.#it's meant to be steered by multiple hands. and maybe that's why i'm not having fun with it anymore.#because it's way too much of you guys Waiting on me to steer the plot when the whole point is that you guys help me steer it.#ask blogging sucks now. i'm tired of it.#it's dead. ask blogging is dead.#the internet is a passive horrible place where people wait for someone to shovel content in their mouth. im not about it.#i came here for community. im not here to shovel content into passive mouths. sighs. sighs.#over it.#i'm not going to fight to keep it alive lads. a sci is going to rest and meditate.#not going to bug my head with something that doesn't make me happy anymore.#a sci can do so much else with their time. like sing. and dance. and learn the banjo.#if you want me you have to treat me right !!! im not your slave!!!#stroke me and kiss me and send me good asks. then i'll stay.
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I haven’t been here long. What irritating changes have been made?
Credit where it's due, some changes have been good, like polls and stuff! But the big recent changes thus far that I would classify as irritating are:
- The UI change. This one may be less irritating for newcomers because it's basically the same layout as twitter and instagram, but for a lot of folks who've been here a long time, it feels cramped and like a loss of identity for the site. For many, the appeal of tumblr is that it ISN'T an algorithm hell like twitter or insta. Also, there's the annoyance of having to relearn where everything is, because it all got moved around.
- The users being lab rats for various tests the devs wanna pull out of nowhere without consenting to beta testing new site features- like the one that took away user icons on the dash for like half the site. They finally put them back after getting enough feedback that said NO, but users were so used to their feedback being disregarded that they were half expecting the change to be pushed through anyway.
- The Netflix tie-in advertising being pushed even to people who had PAID tumblr for a no-ads experience. Complete with them somehow thinking it would be a good idea to put an unescapable-by-scrolling spooky clown on peoples' dashboards that u had to use ublock to get rid of. While I'm not scared of clowns and often find them quite charming, it sucks that staff didn't take coulrophobia being a common fear into account.
- A wave of fully sfw trans posts being wrongfully marked Mature and staff doing little to nothing about it. Not sure if this is still ongoing, but it destroyed a lot of trust and good will. (LGBT+ users have been having to fight a constant war against censorship ever since the adult content ban on tumblr, so yeah... Nevar 4get the list of banned search words that would bring back no results, like 'girl')
- The site gradually moving away from customization. Tumblr is a BLOGGING site. But it seems to have lost sight of that fact, because most new users don't even know you can fully customize your blogs with css and stuff (an option that is now off by default for new accounts!), because of the in-dash viewer giving you only how blogs look on mobile, which is a lot more uniform. There, it's more like every other site- you get a banner and icon. Oh, but you can change colors and fonts from a drop-down list too, that's cool I guess. Though they recently took away custom color schemes on Message windows, just another little bit of personalization taken away.
- TUMBLR. LIVE. Basically tumblr teamed up with a skeevy dating app partner to allow for livestreams- but not the cool kinda livestreams like on twitch where you can draw or play games, no- to a site full of people who value anonymity, they decided to push phone cam only livestreams. Not only that but by agreeing to the terms, you're giving out tons of personal data including your location to said skeevy dating app partner and all of THEIR third-party ad partners. Needless to say, most people didn't wanna use it, so instead of users it's flooded by p*rn bots (which is ANOTHER issue we've been dealing with for a long time and have been getting an even bigger influx of FROM tumblr live) and scammers. And thus, since tumblr likes to put a carousel of current streams on people's dashes, you often get softcore p*rn thumbnails from the bot streams with no way to avoid it except for toggling off tumblr live entirely.
- Oh wait. That's right. You CAN'T toggle it off. Because you can only snooze it for a while until BAM, you're jumpscared by a carousel of ladies licking your screen again! But hey, at least they made the snooze 30 days instead of the 7 it used to be, right? Yeah, except for the fact that you can't get rid of the tumblr live button itself on the app anymore, and now it's front and center with a NEW notification tag on it, overlapping your dash and cramming useful stuff like the search button out of the way.
NOW- A lot of this stuff CAN be at least mostly fixed on desktop by installing ublock and xkit and tampermonkey + dashboard unfucker... But that's a lot of stuff just to make the site usable, you know?
#this isn't even a comprehensive list but hopefully that covers all the big ones#anyway i get tumblr has to make money and it's currently not doing that#but burning through the remaining good will of the people who stuck around through earlier bs doesn't seem like a great idea either#ah well... i'm still here regardless#i've already had to leave deviantart behind because it became an ai cesspit... and it sucked. I had a lot of good memories there.#it sucks to uproot everything and move. so unless something equally bad happens here i'll probs be going down with the ship lol#also there's like nowhere else to go right now which is a huge problem;#i've been trying to look for other places to post too but none really have the same laid-back feeling tumblr does.#also i love the asks system too much. more sites need that honestly#anyway i rambled enough hope this helps u get an idea of why people are angy#asks
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I have learnt things about Geto that I wish I could unlearn
#I think I'm getting about the same amount of spoilers as a few weeks ago except now I understand them#But like. I expected so much of him#Seeing gifs of that one scene in which Gojo gets distracted because of Geto almost made me watch this a year ago#Geto was actually my favourite character in that one JJK fanfic I read that I mention so often even if he had literally one scene#I know so much of the emotional turmoil and conflict in JJK and Gojo in particular depends on him#And you're telling me he's Thanos?#I learnt a few days ago that everything pretty much happens in one year. That there's one year between Geto's death and Gojo's#I thought it would be like ten years. Ten years of the act haunting him#But no? So it's not a broken teenager who has these ideas and is killed by another teenager to stop him?#It's a what? ~30yo man saying Light levels of stupidity? Even worse perhaps?#Goodness I hope this is not so. I hope this is better written than what I am seeing#Because goddammit I can't do it. It would kinda ruin every emotional scene from then on?#That one scene I was so looking forwards about patting Gojo's back or whatever. The one in which Gojo gets distracted. It just. I don't know#I won't be able to be moved if Geto doesn't work xD#I was fearing I wasn't going to like him a lot because my expectations were big but oh my god please not like this#This is way worse than I expected. Someone tell me he actually makes sense. What's the point of this whole political play#in which no one is fully wrong and no one is totally right otherwise? What is the point of the haunting. This feels just idiotic xD#And I don't care about the traumas and all that. That works for the teen not the ~30yo man#It would have worked if Gojo would have killed him like 1-2 years after everything not like a few months ago. Last winter#After like ten years a 30yo man should have realised this plan sucks.#Even if it's utilitarian. Who is going to make clothes? Buildings? Streets and railways? Bread??? Go have a talk with Nanami please#We have been told there are not a lot of jujutsu sorcerers. How are you going to fulfill all those needs out of nothing?#And even if it were little by little so the needs could be getting fulfilled little by little too#If you decimate humans won't that cause more curses? I guess he's thinking on the long run but still this plan seems like a mess#I hope it makes more sense than it's looking it will make because of my god this would truly be the last nail on the coffin xD#I am being more and more tempted to get to Utahime and then just drop this. This is breaking my heart xD#It could be soooo good and it always almost is#And then. AND THEN. Abfksbfndbfkan#Jen pick me up. Come solve this. I am scared xD#I talk too much
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I truly, from the bottom of my heart, hate angst without catharsis.
#i talk#fandom talk#<– I hate it in everything but in this specific instance I'm talking about fandom stuff#This is just in general but I do get kinda tired hearing it rehashed over and over in PhiI's chat#I actually started watching him a little less near the end of the server because I got really sick on chat talking about it nonstop#Love the crows but that was (and still is) obnoxious as hell hearing it get brought up every other message#(Resigned voice) Obligatory ''No hate to folks who like it'' disclaimer I just personally hate trend that with a burning passion#Anyways thinking about this again because it's happening a bit in chat again right now and I'm like ''I am not the target audience for this#streamer talk#I guess#Idk I could get into the specifics of why it sucks but I don't feel the need to defend my taste it just frickin sucks
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or alternatively dweeb meets other dweeb more news at 11
LIGHT. LIGHT IN HIS EYES. LOOK AT EM BIG OLE EYES. LOOK AT HIM TOUCH HIS JERSEY.
GLORY BE TO THE MIKKSY SIGNED JERSEY RAAAAAAAAA
CanesWear Signing | 7.1.24
#niko mikkola#florida panthers#the mortifying ordeal of being known#you can tell how bad i was shaking from how much the jersey moves in my hands oh it was so serious for me its not even funny#“youre my favourite player thats why” “thank you” girl i would eat concrete for you without any hesitation#“new jersey?” me sweating profusely because i have to admit i had this jersey for a while now in front of his face oh god oh FUCK#“where do you want it? here or here?” “anywhere choose where anywhere” “ill do this way”#behold decision paralysis plus the constitution of a doormat with an awful aim to please vs the assuredness of a bull romping through field#“i mean its your jersey at the end of the day”#he says without thinking because he lacks a brain to mouth filter and immediately wants to slam his head into the nearest hardest object#but its okay it got a little smile out of mikksy so maybe my motor mouth can be used for good#my voice is so hoarse because i stood under for 7 hours and also loudly cheered like never before all throughout those 7 hours yesterday#also a lot of people had tickets for both mikksy and lundy or just lundy so thats why the line was moving slowly#so at one point they went OKAY WHO HAS TICKETS FOR JUST NIKO and i raised my hand like oo oo mee ☝️ and got rushed to the front#also a lot of the stuff he was signing was nonspecific posters and hats or other players jerseys (that already had other signatures on em)#which is why the attendant was like oh sweet jersey! and mikksy was like new jersey? because there werent many people at all#comparatively his signing was priced the lowest at 39 out of all cats players. the highest currently is benny at 60#does it suck his line was shorter. there was surprise when someone toddles in with a mikksy jersey. and that his signing was priced low?#yes ofc but also i didnt have to stand in the heat for long got ushered in faster and my wallet didnt cry so lets not kid ourselves here#there are silver lining to everything but anyways first hockey jersey and first signature on it acquire call that a man on a mission 😎👉👉#long tags i love mikksy i lot you understand right <3#also im never wearing this jersey again so i might as well buy a frame and ANOTHER mikksy jersey#to bad it also has my 30th ani cats patch on it too </3
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#as i said i'm only now catching up on what happened at red rocks and honestly i'm just so confused as to#why people are getting hate mail for being at a show???? like unless you were right there at the show you will NOT know what's going on#you can't just ''leave'' a venue because there's security measures ensuring that people don't run and cause a stampede#i get that the team there sucked and should've been much better equipped for an outdoor venue but why the fuck are we blaming the fans????#and then being mad at louis??? yeah i get that his tweet wasn't the best but i'd imagine that he was trying to help out as much as he could#ensuring fans were safe and taken care of. pretty sure he is the one paying all hospital bills and stuff as well#yeah i know he's an artist and he has people doing things for him but also it's louis. he might not have been at ground zero#but i bet he was doing everything he could to help get fans to safety and he had to tweet something amidst all that#just to reassure fans a bit more and he did what he could#besides. i'm sorry but instead of being all ''louis/his team should've done more'' can we all just make sure that the fans#who were actually in that hail storm and who actually got horribly injured and who actually went through such a scary situation#are feeling okay? like why are we arguing about trivial things when what matters the most out of this situation is the fans and their safety#i honestly need people who were not at the venue and people who do not understand how traumatic things can be#to just shut up and log off#anyways to everyone present at red rocks i'm sending you so much love and i'm so sorry something so traumatic happened#i hope everyone is safe and is being treated for their injuries 💌
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