#At least he knew I was gay
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Before my father died, he gave me approval for my choice of girlfriend. I mean, he didn't know she was my gf but he took one look at her and that was enough to get him to routinely bring her up. He only had good things to say about her. He said he really liked her. My father was never one to comment on my friends. Even ones I brought around constantly. The fact he took such a liking to my girlfriend that he brought her up completely unprompted seemed really significant at the time. I haven't thought of it since we broke up but I just remembered and oh man. I guess it was really just random.
#Sometimes I think about how my dad has and will miss so many important things in my life#He never lived to see me get my first job#I can't believe the one woman he gave his approval of is not only one I'm not ending up with#But also the only one he will literally ever get to meet#My mom and dad are literally wire mother and cloth mother#If my mother had died then we would have fallen to poverty with a quickness#But my father dying means I no longer have a parent I truly give a shit about#I really thought my dad's approval was a sign my ex and I were destined#What a fucking blow lmao#At least he knew I was gay#It's crazy to think that when I came out to him he would only be alive for three more years#Fun fact#My dad dying was the closest my ex got to coming out to her family#Cause she was scared of the idea of her parents dying without them knowing#Of course she never did come out to them#But still fun fact lmao
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we all saw Esther turn Monty into a handsome boy and IMMEDIATELY knew that she would use him to seduce Edwin, rather than even thinking that the show would follow a heteronormative cliché and have Crystal be the target or something. and i think that's beautiful
#i swear we all saw Monty and were like “yeah he's not flirting with a lass is he”#at least everyone i know did#AND WE WERE BANG ON#do you reckon Esther knew her crow was gay??#ace's random thoughts :)#dead boy detectives#dbda#monty the crow#monty finch
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Literally almost started sobbing upon the realization that Basil took down the Ratigan portrait by the end. (The same mantle with the gold clock- he replaced it with the news clipping saying he saved the queen💔)
It would’ve been weirder if he kept it up but. WAAUHGHAAHAHAAA
(He kept his bell though. That’s something I can still hold onto.)
#analysis#also like I kinda already knew ratigan died but the fact his portrait his gone. .#that kinda solidifies it#or at least basil is sure he’s dead so now he hangs onto the bell to remind him of his victory#I WISH I HAD A BACKSTORY BETWEEN THESE TWO SO FUCKING BAD#tgmd#the great mouse detective#gay Rats#ratigan#basil x ratigan#basigan
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hello???? looking at the bracelet after that ?? gayass.
#ok we knew episode 2 was the edwin having gay panic about the cat king episode#but i think this is the most unequivocal 'edwin does actually want the cat king too' we get#it's very interesting to me that he is aware at least on some level about how he's attracted to men even this early on#it's not that he doesn't realise how he feels. he just believes it is wrong#dead boy detectives#edwin payne#edwin paine#the cat king#edwin x the cat king#<- i don't actively ship it but i need the reach#im much more fascinated by the internal workings of edwin and how he interacts with people + himself than i am by shipping him with anyone
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article: while Freddie Mercury never discussed his sexuality publicly…
me:
#“Freddie Mercury never came out while he was alive” “with his ambiguous sexuality” “we’ll never know how he’d label himself”#CAN Y’ALL NOT READ OR WHAT#did you do any research whatsoever#Like it’s not even hard to find out#It’s fair to say he was coy and deflective/protective at times. But he explicitly said the words “I’m gay” in print#On at least three separate occassions#Not to mention the testimonies of everyone who ever knew him#INCLUDING AND ESPECIALLY MARY#nothing makes me facepalm more than when I read that#queen#queen band#freddie mercury#Lgbtq#lgbt#gay
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Got back from my trip back down to my old area and it went... really well actually. For all that I hated, hated, HATED living there, during the last 7 years or so I found a community the next town over that was lovely and supportive and wonderfully kind. Some of them have moved away in the time I've been gone, but I had SO much gd fun visiting with everyone still there, watching the renewal of vows, dancing at the reception, getting tons of massive bear hugs and lots of cheek kisses, and I even popped into their church service this morning to visit a bit longer with everyone (hilariously i did not burst into flames or get thrown out). I missed them so much. It's not my faith anymore, and church is no longer my 'place', but my friends there... I'm glad I didn't have to leave them behind, that we all still love each other, that they're all so happy about me being happy and I'm just as happy that they're happy. And some of them said they'd come up to my city to visit! YES. COME TO ME IN THE LAND OF SNOW AND ICE, VISIT ME, LIVE HERE, MOVE HERE, I PROMISE IT'S NOT AS COLD AS YOU THINK.
Also I stopped at my family's favorite hole-in-the-wall bakery before starting home because I'd called ahead for 2 dozen of their speciality chocolate frosted, glazed cinnamon buns, they are as big as your hand, they're the most delicious things I've ever had, the bakery owner lady literally helped me carry all the boxes out to my car, I am going to freeze them and see if me and the fam can't drag out the supply for 6-8 months, I regret nothing.
#pasta life update#i had so much fun and i love them#how do i move them all up here#also i say 'bear hug' in at least one case as a pun#because one of my friends there is huge and fuzzy and flamingly gay and he loves to make bear hug jokes#right before he grabs you and hugs you and lifts you right up off your gd feet#so it was like#an entire two days of just being loved on and hugged and laughing and dancing and i am very happy#AND THEY GAVE ME A RAINBOW UNICORN DUCKIE??? 😭#They apparently gave them out at Pride this year and I always used to help out at their booth#by dressing in my inflatable t rex suit and decking him out in rainbow gear so he was a Pride-a-saurus Rex#(it's an LGBT majority church so they're always at pride)#and they wanted me to know I'm still a part of that family even if I'm not there#and so they gave me a duckie!#i am going to treasure my lil LGBT rainbow unicorn duckie#also they asked about my tattoo! and I got to show it off! THEY WERE SO HAPPY FOR ME CAUSE THEY KNEW HOW LONG I'VE WANTED THIS#anyway sorry for rambling i need to sleep cause i am exhausted LOL
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okay azul having a dream where he like... apparently just wasn't bullied and so he never became friends with floyd and jade, never went to NRC and eventually became super successful and beloved and popular in the coral sea? is fascinating to me because based on the previous dreams where for example lilia and idia's loved ones still suffered and kalim was still causing trouble for jamil, i didn't think the spell they're under would be able to completely erase traumatic experiences like that. jade even explains that he knows azul couldn't be who he is in reality without those experiences--and that's why they're all so shocked to see that he's a star athlete in his dream, because they had just been trying to guess what the azul they know would've been dreaming about! instead they got a version of azul that makes no sense! and i guess it's because as they explain in-game, azul just has such a strong imagination that he's able to carefully construct something like this. which is also fascinating to think about in the context of so many of the other dreamers who just couldn't imagine what their lives would be without the people and experiences that have shaped them, and had dreams that weren't nearly as far from reality than this or were off in very different ways. like vil is literally a mega famous and talented professional actor, and even he couldn't imagine his life without neige around but here we have azul dreaming about his entire life and personality being the complete opposite of who he really is... and not only that but he invited a group of land dwellers to a party just so he could humiliate them for no reason?? azul ashengrotto may be an asshole and yes he may have done terrible things to try and be better than his bullies--but that's the thing, the real azul does want to be undeniably better than them, not just stoop down to their level. so it's just really unsettling to see him like this.
#like i'm not saying this is completely OOC for azul i don't think. i can see how we got here but it's still kind of wild#because at least he gets something from the contracts he makes. in the dream he's being a bully for no tangible gain.#also hmm maybe vil just can't be without neige because he's gay /hj#it's interesting though because also dream!vil treated neige like shit and acted just like the evil queen#when in reality vil for all his faults is like. honestly a pretty kind person and respects neige and knew he majorly fucked up in book 5#dream!vil was happily doing the kind of shit that the real vil thought made him ugly and disgusting in book 5#and now dream!azul has become like the real azul's bullies. insane.#star plays twst#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twst book 7 spoilers
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Everytime I look at Tumblr and see the tl I remember why I hate endgame with a passion you couldn't understand.
They fucked up Steve and Bucky so bad (yes, Bucky too bc suddenly he doesn't matter/isn't even a secondary character that deserves to be near Steve)
It's so funny to me (not) bc they talked about gay characters being in the movie at panels and interviews and even talked about Stucky at some point (basically queerbaiting) for then... Steve not even acknowledging Bucky. An awkward and impersonal hug doesn't cut it.
And Steve suddenly yearning and talking about Peggy? When he didn't even mourned her that bad and already had let her go ages ago? They knew they fucked up in CATWS with Steve and Buckys relationship, so they tried to distance them and then inserted Peggy bc ofc
(they possibly didn't have the time for a new character and they already had fucked up pairing Nat and Bruce and Wanda and Vision). Steve didn't have anyone else he cared about so they couldn't give him a new girlfriend. So they used Peggy AGAIN.
I'm not mad bc "Stucky not canon grr"
No.
I'm fucking pissed off because they did the worst character assassination and friendship assassination possible. Every movie of Cap America revolved around Steve saving Bucky at some point and him caring about him above all else, and you want me to believe that Steven Grant Rogers didn't care about him when Bucky died in front of his eyes? AGAIN? That Peggy's death was more important and impactful for him? If that was the case then why the fuck did he crash the plane then? If he cared so much about Peggy since forever?
No, that was just lazy writing and a way to reinforce Steve's sexuality "He can't be gay and you can't say that bc he LOVES PEGGY"(even tho he only kissed her once, even tho he crashed the plane and didn’t give her the coordinates, he didn't really care that much after all) they could have paired him with Nat in later movies, but they didn't.
That's why I only raise my eyebrows a lil when people say that x character will be gay canonically in a marvel movie/series. Is more than possible they won't. And if they are they're Deadpool, a secondary character no one cares about (obscure in lore too, so they can cut them off) or is plain queerbaiting again (because yes, even if you don’t see Steve and Bucky’s relationship as romantic, they DID QUEERBAIT IT)
Steve and Buckys relationship wasn't even written in a romantic way (you can ship them or not), but they tried so hard to rectify Steve's heterosexuality in endgame, that they fucked up their character arcs on purpose. And now they will always feel hollow and inconclusive. A bad taste in the mouth, a painful reminder of what it was and a what? 11 year long? characterization.
Idk man, I know I've talked about this more than three times, but omfg Tumblr reminds me why I hate that fucking movie!!! It's not my fault!!!
I know I'm going to end up writing something out of spite bc I can't take it shdkdjjcif
"It's been more than 4 years get over it" NEVER
Also the bit with Johnny Storm in Deadpool and Wolverine was also a dig (a fuck you if you will) to the fans bc Deadpool explicitly calls him Cap. And it implies that Steve as a character (not that old Steve nonsense) won't be back.
It's funny they've remade over and over again some movies (Fantastic 4, Spiderman) changed actors for characters (James/war machine, Bruce) and they include them in the multiverse/plot, but they won't do the same to some movies and some characters when they fuck up their stories, because they know if they do, they will have to acknowledge WHY they did it. Like with James/war machine changing actors.
So yeah, that's one of the reasons I don't care about Marvel anymore.
**I mean remake the movies ((Also they Can't remake Cap America bc that would mean they need to remake every important movie. And they don't have the time, the money nor the need. So that's why they decided to fuck their character arcs))
or include some characters in multiverse (they're going to do that with Tony/RDJ/Dr Doom after all, no?) and they also won't remake Cap bc the movies are amazing.
But the point stands. Steve couldn't be in DaW bc that would imply he's an alternative one or that Old!Steve was an alternative one or wasn't even Steve to begin with. But they couldn't do that ofc, no, bc that would give the fans hope in seeing Steve and Bucky together once again. So they did a dig at the fans bc "haha you thought it was Steve, but it's Johnny!"
Idk if I'm making sense at this point I'm tired af, need to sleep.
The thing is that they fucked up Steve Rogers's arc on purpose (Bucky's too, and others charas too tbh) and now they expect the fans to accept everything they give us with open arms. And imho I won't accept shit.
"Deadpool saved the MCU" how? If the other og characters are DEAD or they fucked them up too? Or are the butt of the joke now? Don't make me laugh. Most people don't gaf bout the new charas bc they only are presented in series not everyone watches (only available in one place) or are presented with characters that are dead now or as a replacement for the og characters. They aren't interesting on their own (not really, at least in mcu) and that's why most of the new stuff isn't liked as much. If they wanted to present more characters the opportunity passed already.
Also now if you want to watch and really understand 1 movie (if you don't read the comics too) you need to watch like 20 other movies and 5 shows. it's fucking exhausting.
#oh boy here we go again#im once again SCREAMING INTO THE VOID#anti endgame#anti marvel#i wrote this on twt originally#im really pissed off still#and so so tired#steve rogers#I don’t count X men bc the fucking timeline is more complicated than my brain can process rn#also weren’t they dead too?#idk I can’t remember atm#and I haven’t watched the movies in ages#the thing is I feel cheated bc they fucked up Steve and Buckys relationship specifically#and I can’t accept that and I really cant see Sam and Bucky suddenly being buddy buddy with each other either so TFAWS is a NO for me#also a notp noe bc people LOVE to hate on Steve and shit on him while they write stuff#also why I don’t believe anything Marvel says about having gay characters#if they really cared about representation or shit they would have assumed Steve was gay or at least bisexual or Buckysexual#but they queerbaited the shit out of the promos to give us that big fuck you in the end#and THEY KNEW they fucked up with CATWS because they went from theyre best friends to theyre kinda codependent in like an unhealthy amount#I mean assume in the other tag in a shit we fucked up ok well he’s this now kinda way#if you think about it Steve and Bucky are the almostonly characters that could be canonically gay or bi in the MCU (deadpool doesn’t count)#because they don’t have significant relationships with other people and even less with women#maybe Natasha? but they paired her with Bruce… when he has a relationship with Betty#THEY SHOT THEMSELVES IN THE FOOT AND BLAMED US#basically they got mad at us and broke their own toy bc they had a tantrum#so fuck you russo brothers#fuck you mcu#To the Tony isn’t straight crowd… they paired him with women only in MCU if I remember correctly#and yes I cant see Sam and Bucky as a couple#not sorry and if you ship them great! But i wont interact and not going to follow you bc i really can’t tolerate thst ship
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Let F be a Floer homology theory. For the purposes of this talk, you can assume it's any Floer homology theory you like, and if you don't like any Floer homology theory, then pretend you do like one and assume it's that one
-- a conference speaker
#floer homology#math#maths#mathblr#you really should have at least one Floer homology theory you like!!#i have for a while wanted to do a longpost about floer homology#a very cool concept that shouldn't yield anything but miraculously does#and also about the guy who came up with it (andreas floer)#who was a very interesting guy#he died in 1991 at age 34 which is usually when an academic is only starting to build their influence#and thus didn't have any phd students#and most people in the math community don't seem to have known him personally#(his wikipedia page has a section of quotes about him but they're all about his math#which is pretty much universally agreed to be one of the most striking developments of modern mathematics)#but one time they did a memorial conference a couple years ago in his honour at (uc) berkeley#where they talked about the extremely fruitful field of research he pioneered#they put up posters around campus advertising the conference that happened to have a picture of him#and apparently a bunch of old guys showed up who knew nothing about math#it turned out they were his housemates in the gay commune he used to live in#who were going for a walk around campus and saw a poster with his photo and were like#'wait isn't that our buddy who died twenty-some years ago??'#apparently they knew nothing about math so it was totally incomprehensible to them but they attended the whole conference anyway
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I think genuinely the most hurtful thing someone can do to me is genuinely not care about me
#at least with my toxic gay situationship in high school she cared too MUCH about me#I could always assume that things she did were targeted and it felt good to know she was thinking about me#I’d made a difference in her life#even when she ignored me and acted like I didn’t exist#I knew she was thinking about me#but now?#knowing that someone I cared about LITERALLY does not think about me at all#could not give two shits#genuinely#and he means it#he is simply unbothered and good for him I guess#but wow that’s so much worse
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If Kipperlilly DOES end up betraying Porter/Jace as part of a secret other scheme she has (whether good or evil) and it has to do with saving Lucy, I just know she’s going to be a bitch about it and pull a ‘sorry, I only save High Five Heroes’ before leaving her other friends to die or some shit. And then she will take her final form: Magic Betty from Adventure Time, betraying her allies and saving her frost gf at the expense of the world. It would also parallel what Ankarna is going through (‘your girlfriend’s out of town, it sucks’, becoming a little imperialist rage machine under the influence of Porter/Sunstone but not being able to fully turn on Lucy despite going against her values and turning into a violent weirdo). This is my wish. My dream. I am manifesting it. Magic Betty Kipperlilly I believe in you.
#I am currently painting clown makeup on my face rn but this is what I’ve been rooting for from the beginning so let me dream#Come on though she HAS to have some other shit going on though right?#She was DEFINITLY in that temple when the Bad Kids said Ankarna’s name#Brennan literally rolled#and we know she was in Porter’s office#so WHY hadn’t she told him Ankarna’s real name yet? We know he genuinely believed Fig found it#Also the BKs couldn’t see who was in the window during the Wanda Childa scene#Which one of the RGs has invisibility?#HMMMM#Wanda saying ‘Kipperlilly? Why are you doing this? Is it because you’re jealous?’ before getting carried off by a fake Porter would let KP#know ‘okay they FULLY saw what happened after I killed Buddy and are onto us’ which would cause her to follow them to the temple#Also…if NONE of the Rat Grinders knew Ankarna’s name then what did Lucy write on her form to change her divinity???#We KNOW it was Ankarna’s name and not the ‘symbol representing her’ because no one could see it BECAUSE the god was dead and no one alive#knew her name#Which means Lucy HAD TO HAVE KNOWN and was keeping it from the others right?#And when she died and didn’t come back they were fucked because they couldn’t even check the form anymore#But#Brennan also said that if Porter WASNT using Devil’s Honey and genuinely believed in Rage And Conquest goddess Ankarna instead of just her#domain then he and his ritual would (maybe) bring her back instead of killing her permenantly so he can take her domain#And idk#A powerful goddess of rage and conquest who despite everything can’t be turned against her sister and ex#who’s resurrection would mean the rune could be broken and Lucy can come back to life#One who has (or had) a personal vendetta against at least one of the bad kids#and a personal vendetta against the people who led to Lucy’s death#that sounds pretty appealing to someone as spiteful and obsessive as Kipperlilly doesn’t it#especially after her best (maybe only real) friend died and didn’t come back#especially if she stayed dead specifically to stop Porter#Again I’m putting my clown makeup on but I don’t want her to be secretly good or anything just unhinged and gay and a parallel to Ankarna#Please world let me have this I’m on my knees#dimension 20
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i had so much fun last night omg
#the dragon's parade!!!#cause it's the great dragon weekend here in kraków now#so we finally went out with friends#i always miss those losers we don't really see each other often but i love them sm#then we went to drink at my bestie's place & he finally told them he's gay (i was the only one in the group who knew)#i'm proud of him tbh#also it's so funny cause our friend said she was always intrigued by our relationship#and she was like 99% sure there was something going on between me & him shdhhdhdh#and i can't blame her cause she's not the only person#my mom keeps asking me if he's REALLY gay like at least once a week#also his parents keep asking him about me & they say i'm pretty & that MAYBE THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON HERE#like... no#hell no#he's my little brother i would fucking murder everyone who ever tries to hurt him#but no that's it hdhdhdhdh#i never talk about those kind of stuff so i'm not sure if he knows but i think he knows (i hope he knows)#it's so funny tho i just think we give the same kind of energy#so when people see us together there's this weird kind of chemistry there but like... not in a romantic way#more in a “hey this dude knows all of my secrets & i know all of his as well��� kind of way#idk can't explain i'm happy tho & kinda relieved at the same time cause i don't really like secrets#anyway yesterday was fuuuuun <3#i came back home around 5am i'm exhausted#please give me all the coffee in the world#but sincerely can you hear me?*
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i uh. well. don't know how to explain why i'm just putting this on your dash without warning but Fighter (2024)'s trailer is out and this one's going to murder me
#film: fighter (2024)#fighter#fighter 2024#hrithik roshan#deepika padukone#anil kapoor#bollywood#local gay watches Bollywood.txt#do you know how salty i am that miss Deepika keeps collecting all my DILFs. do you understand this#Anand directed this ofc but i knew from the opening shot he really said 'let me f*ck with y'all and give you a Pathaan x War merger#before it officially happens in a full length film' and i say ty for that bc see#this is the AU Rubi x Kabir agenda there are at least two kisses in the trailer alone. i chose this one bc yk. Besharam Rang vibes#+ it's giving Bang Bang (2014) for some reason. don't ask me why i have the title track in my head atm#Tumblr pls don't block me there's nothing unsafe here sksksksk just heart palpitations for bisexuals#edit: oh how could i forget the semi Don ref in the opening. we're back bitches we're so back
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oh thank goodness the d1 polycule is in tact. FALSE ALARM GANG
#mikan was useful for once#also this is small but kazucihi!! didn’t call her ‘miss sonia’ and also gundham’s hair went back to normal#also those three stood together. a lot.#and also kaz couldn’t resist complimenting gundham that one time#whatever this was a good series#dark as hell though#ALSO SAKAKURA WAS??? ACTUALLY GAY???#i knew there was something i liked about him. he gave me mondo vibes#apparently those vibes were ‘being in love with a high-ranking student council member’#dr3 spoilers#danganronpa spoilers#dr3 anime liveposting#oh hey also i can’t believe kyoko gets two dads and their both dead now#keeping this tabbed for non-despair aus#hey if they’ve got the tech for brainwashing and robo-hands and all that jazz#do you think they’ve figured out cloning#or at the very least like. the ability to make a human body.#for. i don’t know. a ghost to possess and potentially bring everyone back#just spitballing here#OR WAIT#MAYBE BECAUSE KYOKO DIED SHE CAN SEE GHOSTS NOW#HOLY SHIT WAIT#I CAN WORK WITH THIS
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an interaction i had on roblox
#im a true menace sometimes#if u knew me u would know that im the LEAST religious person ever#the first thing this guy said to me was#“are you gay or trans?”#unbenonsed to him he hit the jackpot#i got both lol#p34chymemes
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My thing is that I just do not trust a single person who was involved in the show. It just seems like a lot of PR to fix their image and foster sympathy/goodwill/interest.
#i haven't seen compelling evidence that anybody actually tried to fight for canon (and reciprocated) destiel#just admissions that they played into the subtext#(which we already knew - that's why spn's been considered a prime example of queerbaiting since like 2011)#and non-committal statements about the pairing being compelling#edlund seemed to specifically say he wasn't censored/forced to rework due to the gay#yeah misha said the cw's homophobic and suggested the network was the barrier#but at least half of what comes out of misha's mouth is bullshit#like he also said they tried to pay him to stay bisexual#and as a result there's now a bunch of support being tossed out to the writers and some fans are talking about them like they're heroes#who valliantly fought against a homophobic network and were totally going to make dean and cas a couple#but were foiled by said network which is why the show ended with the gays being buried yet again#you see in the secret unreleased version...#and if we just let jensen make another season he won't let us down because of xyz vague statements#nevermind that he made a new show where cas was also never mentioned - cw censorship#nevermind the straightwashed version of soldier boy he's playing - that's kripke's fault#nevermind the statements he's made in the past about destiel and dean's sexuality - he's changed his mind#you can tell because he's said it's okay for fans to have their own interpretations about the series#idk maybe i'm too cynical and i'm being unfair#there's just too much vagueness from pretty much everybody for me to put faith in their intentions#especially if they are seriously considering attempting to revive the series - this sort of thing is great for drumming up interest#the writers being censored by homophobic execs is a familiar narrative ofc - but i don't see anything solid to suggest this is what happened#and it's not like there weren't queer relationships on tv when spn was airing - the show ended in 2020#it isn't even like there weren't queer relationships shown on the cw during spn's run - there were more than a few#i just have so many questions#spn#destiel
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