#A F T E R TAXES!!

[apprenticestanheight]

I had one taste of the yarn selection at Michaels and now I can never go back to Walmart for yarn again?? what the fuck??

[roxanneslosteyes]

Lloyd: "Hey guys, Do you want a D-E-S-S-E-R-T?"

Mollie: "Yes, Lloyd! I need me a T-R-E-A-T!"

Rambley: "What you guys talking about?"

Salem: "Yeah, Why did you guys spell desse-"

Mollie: "SHHHHH"

Lloyd: "No no no shut up! Don't say it!"

Salem: "Uh, why?"

Lloyd: "Oh god, how do we tell you?"

Finley: "Rambley can't spell..."

Salem: "....what?"

Lloyd: "He can't spell! So when we talk about something we want, we spell it outloud so he doesn't get too excited!"

Salem: "He's a grown raccoon! He can't handle the word treat?!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Lloyd: "NO TREAT!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Lloyd: "NO TREAT!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Lloyd: "No treat!"

Rambley: "Awh :("

Salem: "Okay, what's happening?"

Mollie: "Lloyd and Finley told you! He gets excited when he hears the word T-R-E-A-T!"

Rambley: "Whatcha talking about?"

Finley: ".....taxes..."

Rambley: "Awh shucks :("

Salem: "Wait...So you guys just treat him like a baby raccoon?"

Rambley: "TREAT!?"

Mollie: "No treat!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Mollie: "No treat!"

Rambley: "Treat?!"

Mollie: "No treat!"

Rambley: "Awwwww :("

Lloyd: "Salem! You gotta spell if you talking about F-O-O-D!"

Salem: "Okay so you guys are getting a S-N-A-C-K?"

Rambley: "SNACK?!"

Finley: "Oh, come on..."

Lloyd: "Salem really?"

Mollie: "Awh man..."

Salem: "OH COME ON! I SPELLED IT!"

Lloyd: "Well he knows how to spell snack!"

Salem: "So he can spell snack but he cannot spell treat?!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Salem: "NO TREAT!!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Salem: "NO TREAT!"

Rambley: "TREAT?!"

Salem: "NO TREAT!!"

Rambley: "GOSH DANG IT!!"

Mollie: "Okay, he is getting fussy. Time for a N-A-P!"

Rambley: "Yeahhh!! :)"

Salem: "What does N-A-P spell?"

Rambley: "Party."

[brokentrafficknight]

Yang: You guys wanna go get some d-e-s-s-e-r-t?

Ruby: Yeah dude! I need me a t-r-e-a-t!

Dog!Jaune: What're you guys talkin' about?

Blake: Yeah why did you guys just spell desser-

Ruby: Shut up don't say it!

Yang: Shh!

Blake: Uh, why?

Ruby: Oh God. How do we tell you this?

Yang: Jaune... Can't spell.

Blake: ...What?

Ruby: He can't spell. So when we talk about something he wants we spell it out loud so he doesn't get too excited.

Blake: He's a grown man! He can't handle hearing the word 'treat'?

Jaune, tail wagging: Treat?

Yang: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Yang: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Yang: No treat!

Jaune, ears drooping: Awww...

Blake: Okay, what is happening?

Yang: We told you! He gets excited when he hears the word t-r-e-a-t.

Jaune: Whatcha talkin' about?

Yang: Taxes

Jaune: Aw shucks!

Blake: So you guys just treat him like a toddler?

Jaune: Treat?

Ruby: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Ruby: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Ruby: No treat!

Jaune: Awwww...

Ruby: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about f-o-o-d.

Blake: Okay, so... Are we getting an s-n-a-c-k?

Jaune: Snack?

Ruby: Oh come on.

Yang: Dude, really?

Blake: Oh come on. I spelled it!

Ruby: Well he knows how to spell snack.

Blake: So he can spell snack, but he can't spell treat?

Jaune: Treat?

Blake: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Blake: No treat!

Jaune: Treat?

Blake: NO TREAT!

Jaune: God dammit!

Yang: Okay, he's getting fussy. Time for an n-a-p.

Jaune: Yeah!

Blake: *Narrowing her eyes* What does n-a-p spell?

Jaune: Party!

[momojedi]

Hunter: Hey you guys wanna go get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T?

Tech: Yeah, I really need me a T-R-E-A-T.

Wrecker: Whatcha guys talking about?

Echo: Yeah, why don’t you guys just spell dess —

Hunter, in utter distress: NO NO NO, SHHHHH

Tech, in utter distress:

SHUT UP, DON’T SAY IT

Echo, taken back: … uh. Why?

Hunter: Oh god, how do we tell you this?

Tech: Wrecker … can’t spell …

Echo:

Echo: WHAT?

Hunter: He can’t spell, so when we talk about something he wants, we spell it out loud so he doesn’t get too excited.

Echo: He’s a grown man, he can’t handle hearing the word TREAT?

Wrecker: TREAT??

Tech: No treat

Wrecker: TREAT?

Tech: NO TREAT

Wrecker: T R E A T ??

Tech: NO TREAT.

Wrecker, disappointed: Awww :(

Tech, Hunter & Echo:

Echo: Okay, what is happening?

Tech: We told you, he gets excited when he hears the word T-R-E-A-T.

Wrecker, curiously: Whatcha talking about?

Tech: Taxes.

Wrecker: Aw, shucks.

Echo: What, so you guys just treat him like a toddler?

Wrecker: TREAT?

Hunter: No treat.

Wrecker: TREAT??

Hunter: NO TREAT.

Wrecker: T R E A T?

Hunter: NO. TREAT.

Wrecker, disappointed: Awwww :(

Tech, Hunter & Echo:

Hunter: Echo, you gotta spell if you’re talking about F-O-O-D.

Echo: Okay, so … Are we getting an S-N-A-C-K?

Wrecker: SNACK??

Tech: Oh, come on.

Hunter: Dude, really?

Echo: OH COME ON I SPELLED IT.

Hunter: Well, he knows how to spell SNACK!

Echo: So he can spell snack but he can’t spell TREAT?

Wrecker: TREAT??

Echo: NO TREAT

Wrecker: TREAT??

Echo: NO TREAT!

Wrecker: GOD DAMN IT!

[incorrectbatfam]

Ace: Hey, you guys wanna get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T?

Krypto: Yeah dude I need a T-R-E-A-T.

Titus: What'cha guys talking about?

Haley: Yeah, why did you guys just spell dess—

Ace: No no no, shh.

Krypto: Shut up! Don't say it!

Haley: Uh... why?

Krypto: Oh God, how do we tell you this?

Ace: Titus... can't spell.

Haley: ...What?

Krypto: He can't spell so when we talk about something he wants we spell it out loud so he doesn't get too excited.

Haley: He's a grown dog, he can't handle hearing the word treat?

Titus: TREAT?

Ace: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Ace: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Ace: NO TREAT!

Titus: Aww.

Haley: Okay, what is happening?

Ace: We told you he gets excited when he hears the word T-R-E-A-T.

Titus: What'cha talking about?

Ace: Taxes.

Titus: Aw, shucks.

Haley: What, so you guys just treat him like a toddler?

Titus: TREAT?

Krypto: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Krypto: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Krypto: NO TREAT!

Titus: Aww.

Krypto: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about F-O-O-D.

Haley: Okay, so... are we getting an S-N-A-C-K?

Titus: SNACK?

Krypto: Oh COME ON.

Ace: Haley, really?

Haley: Oh come on, I spelled it!

Krypto: Well he knows how to spell snack.

Haley: So he can spell snack but he can't spell treat?!

Titus: TREAT?

Haley: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Haley: NO TREAT!

Titus: TREAT?

Haley: NO TREAT!

Titus: GODDAMNIT!

[aggro-my-beloved]

lasko: hey, you guys wanna go get some d-e-s-s-e-r-t?

freelancer: yeah dude i need me a

t-r-e-a-t

huxley: watcha guys talkin about? :3

damien: yeah why did you guys just spell des—

lasko: no no, shh!

freelancer: shut up…don’t say it

damien: uh, why?

lasko: oh god, how do we tell you this?

freelancer: huxley can’t spell

huxley: (:

damien:…what? 

lasko: he can’t spell. so when we talk about something he wants, we spell it out loud so he doesn’t get too excited.

damien: he’s a grown man, he can’t handle hearing the word ‘treat’?

huxley: treat?

lasko: no treat!

huxley: treat?

lasko: no treat!

huxley: treat?

lasko: no treat!

huxley: aww \:

damien: okay what is happening?

lasko: we told you he gets excited when he hears the word t-r-e-a-t

huxley: watcha talkin about? :3

lasko: taxes.

huxley: aww shucks

damien: so you guys just treat him like a toddler?!

huxley: treat?

freelancer: no treat!

huxley: treat?

freelancer: no treat!

huxley: treat?

freelancer: no treat!

huxley: awww

freelancer: dude, you gotta spell if you’re talking about f-o-o-d

damien: okay, so are we getting a

s-n-a-c-k

huxley: snack?!

freelancer: oh c’mon

lasko: aw, dude really?

damien: oh come on, i spelled it!

freelancer: well he knows how to spell ‘snack’

damien: so he can spell ‘snack’ but he can’t spell ‘treat’?

huxley: treat?

damien: NO TREAT!

huxley: treat?

damien: NO TREAT!

huxley: treat?

damien: NO TREAT!

huxley: god damnit!

lasko: okay, he’s getting fussy, it’s time for a n-a-p

huxley: yeah (:

damien (to huxley): what does n-a-p spell?

huxley: party

[mysticworks]

F 1 - M A S T E R L I S T:

Requests are now open for any driver on the grid.

All of my writings are Asian Fem! reader unless stated otherwise :)

Last Updated: 23/04/24

L E W I S H A M I L T O N:

I believe in you || 1.7k words ~ Slight Angst/ Sparks flying? When Lewis makes a sudden appearance in your office, 9 years after being apart, you don't know what to feel. That is, until he makes a confession...something he's been wanting to say for all this time.

Make it up to you || < 1k words ~ Angst/Fluff Lewis is held up at the office after a long and taxing day. Returning home late means all your birthday plans have gone down the drain.

Still I rise || 1.2k words ~ Angst A difficult qualifying session leaves Lewis in need of comfort, as he begins to start doubting his abilities. It's up to you, to refuel his courage and give back his confidence.

C A R L O S S A I N Z:

Love you like I do || 1k words ~ Fluff Carlos' family invites you home for dinner. It's your first time meeting them and nerves consume you whole - nerves that only Carlos can get rid of.

L A N D O N O R R I S:

Your eyes || Prologue || Chapter One ||

Lando sets his eyes on you at a team meeting and can't look away. Your eyes have him mesmerised.

One day too late || 1.5k words ~ Angst

Carried away at the party, you and Lando share a beautiful night. You both move on and pretend it never happened, ignoring your feelings for each other...until 6 weeks later you find out you're carrying his child.

[emolionsrawr]

chimney: hey do you guys wanna go get some D E S S E R T?

hen: yeah dude i need me a T R E A T

buck: whatcha guys talking about? :D

eddie: yeah why did you guys just spell desse-

chimney: NO NO NO!

hen: SHUT UP! DONT SAY IT!

eddie: uh, why?

hen: oh god how do we tell you this?

chimney: buck... can't spell

buck:

eddie:... WHAT?

hen: can't spell! so when we talk about something he wants, we spell it out loud so he doesn't get too excited

eddie: he's a grown man! he can't handle hearing the word treat?

buck: TREAT?!

chimney: no treat!

buck: TREAT?!

chimney: no treat!

buck: awww

eddie: okay what is happening?!

chimney: we told you! he gets excited when he hears the word T R E A T

buck: whatcha talkin about? :D

chimney: taxes

buck: aw :(

eddie: so you guys just treat him like a toddler?

buck: TREAT?!

hen: no treat!

buck: TREAT?!

hen: no treat!

buck: aww :(

hen: dude you gotta SPELL when you're talking about F O O D

eddie: okay, so, are we getting a S N A C K?

buck: SNACK?!

hen: oh come on

chimney: dude really?

eddie: oh come on i spelled it!

hen: he knows how to spell snack!

eddie: so he can spell snack but he can't spell treat?

buck: TREAT?!

eddie: NO TREAT!

buck: TREAT?!

eddie: NO TREAT?!

buck: GOD DAMN IT!!

chimney: okay he's getting fussy it's time for a N A P

buck: YEAH! :D

eddie: what does N A P spell?

buck: party 🥰🥰

[the-black-bulls]

Noelle: Hey, you guys wanna get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T?

Asta: Yeah I need a T-R-E-A-T.

Charmy: What'cha guys talking about?

Yuno: Yeah, why did you guys just spell dess—

Noelle: No no no, shh.

Asta: Shut up! Don't say it!

Yuno: Uh... why?

Asta: Oh man, how do we tell you this?

Noelle: Chramy... can't spell.

Yuno:

Yuno: ...What?

Asta: She can't spell so when we talk about something she wants we spell it out loud so she doesn't get too excited.

Yuno: She's a grown woman, she can't handle hearing the word treat?

Charmy: TREAT?

Noelle: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Noelle: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Noelle: NO TREAT!

Charmy: Aww.

Yuno: Okay, what is happening?

Noelle: We told you she gets excited when she hears the word T-R-E-A-T.

Charmy: What'cha talking about?

Noelle: Taxes.

Charmy: Aw, shucks.

Yuno: What, so you guys just treat her like a toddler?

Charmy: TREAT?

Asta: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Asta: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Asta: NO TREAT!

Charmy: Aww.

Asta: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about F-O-O-D.

Yuno: Okay, so... are we getting an S-N-A-C-K?

Charmy: SNACK?

Noelle: OH COME ON.

Asta: Yuno, really?

Yuno: Oh come on, I spelled it!

Asta: Well she knows how to spell snack.

Yuno: So she can spell snack but she can't spell treat?!

Charmy: TREAT?

Yuno: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Yuno: NO TREAT!

Charmy: TREAT?

Yuno: NO TREAT!

Charmy: GODDAMNIT!

Noelle:

Asta:

Yuno: ...I'm sorry.

[incorrect-tmnt2012-quotes]

Leo: Hey you guys wanna go get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T? Raph: Yeah, dude I need me a T-R-E-A-T. Mikey: What are you guys talking about? April: Yeah, why did you guys just spell desser- Raph: No! Shut up! Don't say it! April: Uh, why? Donnie: Oh god, how do we tell you this... Mikey can't spell. April: ...WHAT?! Leo: He can't spell, so when we talk about something he wants we spell it out loud so he doesn't get too excited. April: He's 15, he can't handle hearing the word "treat". Mikey: Treat?! Raph: No treat! Mikey: Treat?! Raph: No treat!! Mikey: Treat?! Raph: NO TREAT! Mikey: Aww... April: Okay, what is happening? Leo: We told you, he gets excited when he hears the word T-R-E-A-T. Mikey: Whatcha talking about?? Donnie: Taxes. Mikey: Aw, shucks... April: So you guys just treat him like a toddler?! Mikey: Treat?! Donnie: No treat! Mikey: Treat?! Donnie: No treat!! Mikey: Treat?! Donnie: NO TREAT! Mikey: Aww... Raph: You gotta spell if you're talking about F-O-O-D. April: Okay, so are we getting a S-N-A-C-K? Mikey: Snack?! Leo: Come on! Raph: Really April?! April: Oh come on! I spelled it! Raph: He knows how to spell "snack"! April: So he can spell "snack" but he can't spell "treat"?! Mikey: Treat?! April: No treat! Mikey: Treat?! April: No treat!! Mikey: Treat?! April: NO TREAT! Mikey: GOD DAMMIT!! Leo: Okay, he's getting fussy, it's time for an N-A-P. Mikey: Yeah! April, to Mikey: What does N-A-P spell? Mikey: "Party"!

[athanasius-symposium-of-writings]

NSFT Alphabet: Antonio Paganini

@turbulentscrawl screaming wonderwall with me

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Antonio massages the sorest parts of your body (wrists, arms, hips, legs), and would draw a bath for you both to enjoy (def the type to enjoy stay intimately close). If the devil was in charge though, you need to supply the emotional aftercare, yes you may have granted permission but it is taxing on Antonio. Would def cuddle after sex and likes the weight of you on top of him, again likes skin-on-skin contact. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His face especially his nose, has a beautiful profile and he knows it. Hands but like Frederick is a man of his time and would like your feet too. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Realistic he has none, his body is technically undead`` So yay no cleanup (sorry ppl who like creampies) but unrealistically I wish he had glowly cum hbfvhbbvbv (devil skin and crescent knight)

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He is an older man and like Luchino and Alva he pretty open with what he likes (he is this way with your wants too be open about it)

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)

No virgin, there is no way this man didn’t get laid (ps though most of them was when he was drunk)

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He likes to be ridden 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

Can match your energy with this so if you start giggling he will too (esp for those who are ticklish this is great!)

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

Ngl prob a brush down there and you know it prob soft and you just touching it cuz wow it soft wtf 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)

Again bounces from your energy 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Stress masturbate probably or the devil does it (sir go get your own body!)

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Foot fetish, bondage with his hair, spit in his mouth or he spit in your mouth, you pulling his hair

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Okay so if you are in-game with him, he might get frisky but not always but happens, has fucked in the music room (fuck off Frederick!), his or your bedroom

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Flirting can get him good, but so can deep conversations the type where you are genuinely trying to get to know him. There is something very intimate about that for a man whose whole life revolved around his talents and people being fake about their intentions with him. The deep connection gets him going and when you are expressing romantic intentions after awhile that gets him going.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)

Will say devil but he does not have a choice in that manner, it will come out and he hates it. It is complex and he fears one day hurting you-- The devil hurting you but again there is not much of a choice in this.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

This man, this man’s fucking nose, bye working legs.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Depending on the mood he can be fast and rough or slow and sensual or between that or a damn tease; maestro just built like that

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Depends on the situation but not one for quickies (the devil is though)

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? Do they take risks? etc.)

Because of the Devil’s involvement, you need to expect risks. Whatever Antiono has, he expected to know he will be forced to share. 

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)

He can go as long as you need him to go

T = Toys (do they own toys? Do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Use them on him, no really use them on him. I think it important to show him he can be safe and in control while being the one submissive. Show him is safe while using these and constantly be with him

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

You both need to be unfair but not too much there needs to be an endgame

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Antiono can be vocal, and you might even try to be quiet just so you can enjoy how pretty his voice is

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Looks at that Devil that trying to get in your pants….

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

IT GOOD OKAY (it got bigger)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Antiono has the average sex drive but then you got the hellion that is always ready to go so…

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)

He doesn’t actually need to sleep but he does relax with you enjoying the peace

[roxanneslosteyes]

Francis: "Hey guys, Do you wanna get some D-e-s-s-e-r-t?"

Nacha: "Yes dearie! I need me a t-r-e-a-t!"

Robetsky: "Whatcha everyone talking about?"

Steven: "Yeah, Why did you two just spelled desser-"

Angus: "Shhhh!"

Francis: "No no no shut up! Don't say it!"

Steven: "Uh, why?"

Francis: "Oh god, how do we tell you?"

Albertsky: "Robertsky can't spell..."

Steven: "....What?"

Albertsky: "He can't spell! So when we talk about something he wants! We spell it out so he doesn't get too excited!"

Steven: "He is a grown man! He can't handle the word treat?"

Robertsky: "Treat?"

Nacha: "No treat"

Robertsky: "Treat?"

Nacha: "No treat"

Robertsky: "Treat?"

Nacha: "No treat"

Robertsky: "Awh :("

Steven: "Okay, what's happening?"

Angus: "We told you this! He gets excited when he hears the word T-r-e-a-t!"

Robertsky: "Whatcha talking about?"

Izaack: "....Taxes..."

Robertsky: "Awh shucks :("

Steven: "So you guys just treat him like a toddler?"

Robertsky: "Treat?!"

Izaack: "No treat!"

Robertsky: "Treat?!"

Izaack: "No treat!"

Robertsky: "Treat?!"

Izaack: "No treat!"

Robertsky: "Awwwh :("

Izaack: "Steve, you gotta spell if you are talking about F-O-O-D!"

Steven: "Okay so we are getting a s-n-a-c-k?"

Robertsky: "SNACK!?"

Angus: "Awh come on..."

Izaack: "Aw dear"

Francis: "Steven really?"

Steven: "COME ON! I SPELLED IT!!"

Albertsky: "Well he knows how to spell snack!"

Steven: "So he can spell snack but he can't spell treat!"

Robertsky: "TREAT!?"

Steven: "NO TREAT!"

Robertsky: "TREAT!?"

Steven: "NO TREAT!"

Robertsky: "TREAT!?"

Steven: "NO TREAT!"

Robertsky: "GOD DAMN IT!"

Elenois: "Okay, he is getting fussy! Time for a N-A-P!"

Robertsky: "Yeah! :)"

Angus: "What does N-A-P spell?"

Robertsky: "Party!"

[chronicbeans]

A group of doppelgangers planning to head to the building:

6 Eyes: You guys wanna go get some d-e-s-s-e-r-t?

Long Neck: Yeah dude. I need me a t-r-e-a-t.

Peach: What you guys talking about?

Scarlet Milk: Yeah. Why did you guys just spell desser-

Long Neck: Shut up! Don't say it!

Scarlet Milk: Uh... why?

Long Neck: Oh God, how tell you this?

6 Eyes: Peach... can't spell...

Scarlet Milk: ... What?

Long Neck: He can't spell. So when we talk about something he wants, we spell it out.

Scarlet Milk: He's a grown doppelganger. He can't handle hearing the word treat?

Peach: Treat?!

6 Eyes: No treat!

Peach: Treat?!

6 Eyes: No treat!

Peach: Treat?!

6 Eyes: No treat!

Peach: Aww...

Scarlet Milk: Okay... What is happening?

6 Eyes: We told you. He gets excited when he hears the word t-r-e-a-t.

Peach: What are you talking about?

6 Eyes: Taxes.

Peach: Aww... shucks.

Scarlet Milk: What? So you guys just treat him like a toddler?

Peach: Treat?!

Long Neck: No treat.

Peach: Treat?!

Long Neck: No treat.

Peach: Treat?!

Long Neck: No treat.

Peach: Aww...

Long Neck: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about f-o-o-d.

Scarlet Milk: Okay, so, are we getting some p-e-a-c-h-e-s?

Peach: Peach?!

Long Neck: Oh come on!

6 Eyes: Dude, really?

Scarlet Milk: oh, come on! I spelled it!

Long Neck: Well, he knows how to spell peach.

Scarlet Milk: So he knows how to spell peaches, but he can't spell treat?

Peach: Treat?!

Scarlet Milk: No treat.

Peach: Treat?!

Scarlet Milk: No treat!

Peach: Treat?!

Scarlet Milk: NO TREAT!

Peach: God damnit!

6 Eyes: Okay, he's getting fussy. It's time for an n-a-p.

Peach: Yeah...

Scarlet Milk: What does n-a-p spell?

Peach: Party.

[smh0217]

Jaune: Hey, you guys wanna go and get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T?

Ren: Yeah, I could go for a T-R-E-A-T.

Nora: Whatcha guys talking about?

Weiss: Yeah, why did you guys just spell desse-

Jaune: NONONONONO SHHH!!!

Ren: DONT SAY IT!!!

Weiss: Uh... why?

Ren: How do we tell you this…

Jaune: Nora… can’t spell…

Weiss: WHAT?

Ren: She can’t spell. So when we talk about something she wants we spell it out loud so she doesn’t get too excited.

Weiss: She’s 23. She can't handle hearing the word "treat"?

Nora: TREAT?!

Jaune: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Jaune: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Jaune: NO TREAT!!!

Nora: awww.

Weiss: Ok, what is happening?

Jaune: We told you! She gets excited when she hears the word T-R-E-A-T.

Nora: Whatcha guys talking about?

Jaune: Taxes.

Nora: aw shucks.

Weiss: So you guys just treat her like a toddler?

Nora: TREAT?!

Ren: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Ren: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Ren: NO TREAT!!!

Nora: awww.

Ren: You have to spell if you’re talking about F-0-O-D.

Weiss: Ok… So are we getting a S-N-A-C-K?

Nora: Snack?!

Jaune: Really?!

Ren: Oh come on!

Weiss: Oh for the love of- I SPELLED IT!

Jaune: Well she KNOWS how to spell snack.

Weiss: So she can spell snack, but she can't spell treat???

Nora: TREAT?!

Weiss: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Weiss: No treat!

Nora: TREAT?!

Weiss: NO TREAT!!!

[jasonsthunderthighs]

Dick: Hey, you guys wanna go get some D-E-S-S-E-R-T?

Kori: Yea, dude I need me a T-R-E-A-T.

Duke: Whatcha guys talkin’ ‘bout?

Jason: Yea, why did you guys just spell “dess-”

Dick: *Coverin’ Jason’s mouth* No, no, no! SHUT UP! Don’t say it-

Duke: Uh.. Why?

Dick: Oh, God. How do we tell you guys this?

Kori: Garfield can’t spell.

Jason:

Jason: What?

Kori: He can’t spell, so when we talk ‘bout somethin’ that he wants, we spell it out loud so he doesn’t get too excited.

Jason: He’s a grown ass person and can’t handle hearin’ the word “Treat”?

Garfield: Treat?

Kori and Dick: No treat!

Garfield: Treat??

Kori and Dick: No treat!

Garfield: Treat???

Kori and Dick: No treat!

Garfield: Aww.. *Goes to hug Duke in disappointment*

Duke: *Confused as he comforts Garfield* Ok, what is happenin’?

Kori: We told you! He gets excited when he hears the word “T-R-E-A-T”!

Garfield: *Looks at both Kori and Dick* Watcha talkin’ ‘bout?

Dick: Taxes.

Garfield: Aww, shucks!

Jason: So, what? You guys treat him like a toddler?

Garfield: Treat?

Kori and Dick: NO TREAT!

Garfield: TREAT??

Kori and Dick: NO TREAT!

Garfield: TREAT???

Kori and Dick: NO TREAT!!

Garfield: Aww.

Dick: Dude, you gotta SPELL if you’re talkin’ ‘bout F-O-O-D.

Jason: Ok.. So.. Are we gettin’ a.. S-N-A-C-K?

Garfield: Snack?

*Kori and Dick groan*

Dick: Oh, c’mon!

Kori: Dude, really?

Jason: C’mon! I SPELT it!

Dick: Well, he KNOWS how to spell “snack”!

Jason: So, he can spell “snack” but can’t spell “treat”??

Garfield: Treat??

Jason: NO TREAT!

Garfield: TREAT?

Jason: NO TREAT!!

Garfield: TREAT???

Jason: NO TREAT!!!

Garfield: GOD DAMMIT!

[thevoidstaredback]

How To Balance (+guests) as more things that live in my head

Dick: 🎶PTSD... Anxiety... Crippling Depression, there is no question, please just kill me! Let me be with Harambee. I feel like shit every day! I'm asking you nicely, do it by drowning, under the sea!🎶

Tim: 🎶 I've no more fucks to give, my fucks have all run out! I tried to go fuck shopping, but there's no fucks on the shelf!🎶

Brucie Wayne, laying it on thick: 🎶My name is Karen! My hair is shiny. My teeth are perfect. My skirt is tiny. It barely covers my perky hiney. My name is Karen, I might not be smart! That's it.🎶

Bruce: So... who broke it? ... I'm not mad. I just want to know.

Alfred: I did. I broke-

Bruce: No, no you didn't. Tim?

Tim: Don't look at me. Look at Danny.

Danny: What? I didn't break it.

Tim: Huh. That's weird. How'd you even know it was broken?

Danny: Because it's sitting right in front of us and it's broken.

Tim: Suspicious.

Babs: If it matters - probably not - but Dick was the last one to use it.

Dick: Liar! I don't even drink that crap!

Babs: Oh, really? Then what were you doing by the coffee cart earlier?

Dick: I use the wooden stirrers to push back my cuticles; everyone knows that, Barbra!

Alfred: Ok, ok! Let’s not fight! I broke it, let me pay for it, Bruce!

Bruce: No! Who broke it??!

Danny: Bruce... Selina's been awfully quiet.

Selina: REALLY??

Bruce: Yeah! Really.

Selina: Oh, my God!

Bruce: ...

Bruce: I broke it. It burned my hand, so I punched it. I predict ten minutes from now they'll be at each other's throats with war paint on their faces and a pig head on a stick. Good. It was getting a little chummy around here.

Babs: 🎶I 👏 am ready 👏 for a 👏 nap!🎶

Dick: 🎶 I did it, I did. I jumped, I stepped, right off that cliff without a parachute. I looked over the edge and saw the view of something I could never do. And no part of me knew how, but the moment came and it had to be now, so, I did it, I did. I jumped, I stepped, right off that cliff without a parachute.🎶

Dick: Hey, you guys wanna go get some d-e-s-s-e-r-t?

Tim: Yeah, dude, I need me a t-r-e-a-t

Danny: What'chu guys talkin' about?

Babs: Yeah, why'd you guys just spell des-

Dick: No, no, no, no! Shut up!

Tim: Shh!

Dick: Shut up! Don't say it

Babs: Uh, why?

Tim: Oh, god, how do we tell you this?

Dick: Danny..can't spell

Danny: :)

Babs: ...what?

Tim: He can't spell, so when we talk about something he wants, we spell it out loud so that way he doesn't get too excited

Babs: He's a hero, and he can't handle hearing the word 'treat'?

Danny: Treat?

Dick: No treat!

Danny: Treat?!

Dick: No treat!

Danny: Treat?!?

Dick: No treat!

Danny: Aw...

Babs: Okay, what is happening?

Dick: We told you! He gets excited when he hears the word t-r-e-a-t!

Danny: What'chu talkin' about?

Dick: Taxes.

Danny: Aw, shucks

Babs: So, what, you guys just treat him like a toddler?

Danny: Treat?

Tim: No treat!

Danny: Treat?!

Tim: No treat!!

Danny: Treat?!?

Tim: No treat!!!

Danny: Aw.....

Tim: Dude, you gotta spell if you're talking about f-o-o-d!

Babs: Okay, so, are we getting an s..n-a-c-k?

Danny: Snack?!

Tim: Oh, c'mon!

Dick: Dude, really?

Babs: Come on, I spelled it!

Tim: He knows how to spell 'snack'!

Babs: So he can spell 'snack', but he can't spell 'treat'?!

Danny: Treat?

Babs: No treat!!

Danny: Treat?!

Babs: No treat!!!

Danny: Treat?!?

Babs: No treat!!!!

Danny: God damn it!

Dick: Okay, he's getting fussy; it's time for an n-a-p

Danny: Yeah.. :D

Babs: What does n-a-p spell?

Danny: Party

Dick: LOOK! I'm a teenage girl, I'd rather be anywhere than here! I'm all about long sullen silences, followed by mean comments, followed by more silence! So what's it gonna be: long sullen silence or mean comment? Go on, take your pick.

Tim: ...You got me in a box here.

Dick: AH-HAA!

Dick/Bruce: 🎶Cut my life into pieces!🎶

Danny/Tim: 🎶This is my chocolate bar!🎶

Danny, upon first glance of Wayne Manor: This house is a fucking Nightmare.

Dick: It's Muffin Time!

Danny: Actually, it's 12:30

Dick: Somebody kill me!

Danny: I can't believe giraffes exist but unicorns don't. What's more believable? A house with a horn or a leopard moose camel with a 40 foot neck?

Tim: That's why I switched to caffeine patches. You can stay awake for days with no side effects

Danny: ...

Tim: AHHHH!!!

Danny: January, February, March, April, May, June, July, 🎶Jason Derulo🎶

Child!Dick: ...What if I fall?

Mary Grayson: Oh, but what if you fly?

Danny: No capes! *slap*

Danny: Behold! The spee-i-der

Danny: Objection! Nu uh

Bruce: The fuck you mean 'nu uh'?!