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dollishsz · 2 days ago
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WE LISTEN, WE DON’T JUDGE TREND ── .✦
A/n: so there’s this trend on TikTok where it’s like “we listen we don’t judge” and I couldn’t stop thinking about batboys doing this (here’s the trend -> trend) SO UM YEAH.
(tags: batboys we listen we don’t judge trend.)
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All of them: we listen, we don’t judge.
jason: "I once stole the Batmobile because Bruce wouldn't let me drive it, then parked it in front of Crime Alley like it was a trophy."
Dick: "And you’re proud of that?"
Tim: "He said we don’t judge."
Damian: "But I am judging."
── .✦
All of them: “We listen. We don’t judge.”
Dick: "I once did an entire patrol in sequined tights because I forgot my suit, and honestly? Gotham didn’t notice."
Jason: "They definitely noticed, man."
Tim: "Still doesn’t top the mullet plus, discowing, plus-“ *cue dick shushing him with his finger aggressively*
Damian: "Disgraceful, I don’t associate with you imbeciles.”
── .✦
All of them: “We listen. We don’t judge.”
Tim: "I once fell asleep on a rooftop during patrol and woke up to pigeons sitting on me, back when I was robin I think.”
Jason: "Bro, how do you survive Gotham?"
Dick: "Better question—how did we not find you?"
Damian: "this is why I try to escape you guys.”
── .✦
All of them: “We listen. We don’t judge.”
Damian: "I once released a venomous snake in the Batcave to test Father’s reflexes."
Jason: "See? This is why nobody wants to come near you within a 6 mile radius."
Tim: "I still have nightmares from Bruce’s screams.”
Dick: "Bruce does too, I heard him screaming about snakes the other night, no wonder why.”
── .✦
All of them: “We listen. We don’t judge.”
Duke: "I once wore a full frankstein suit to school for spirit day... because I forgot it wasn’t Halloween and like mixed up Halloween and spirit day up.”
Jason: "I’m so proud of you."
Damian: "Jason can go dress up like frankstein because he doesn’t need to color the scars or stit-“ *cue jason leaping from his seat towards damian*
Dick: “WHAT THE FUCK-“
── .✦
*video ends with jason and Damian sitting on the couch in full body casts.*
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mermaidgirl30 · 2 days ago
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✨Saving What Was Lost Part 4: Bubble Baths and Faded Scars✨
Pre-Outbreak! Joel Miller x fem! reader
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Series Masterlist
A/N: Cut my entire heart out to write this chapter. I love love how soft Joel is, and I hope this brings a little comfort to all the healing girlies 🩷 There’s a lot of triggers in this chapter, so pay attention to the tags. I hope you enjoy this chapter because I so loved writing it.
Chapter Summary: Who knew that facing one of your fears would be so hard? It’s just a shower, but a shower is so much more to you. And just when you think you can’t face it, Joel helps you one step at a time.
Rating: Explicit 18+ only MDNI
Word Count: 6k words
Chapter Tags: Mentions of being trafficked, flashbacks of being abused and SA, angst, soft and protective Joel, PTSD, no use y/n, age gap (reader is late 20’s, Joel is late 40’s), pre-outbreak au, shower triggers, vulnerable reader, panic attack, sweet nicknames (sweetheart, angel)
Dividers by @saradika-graphics
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One month. You’ve been here one entire whole month and you still haven’t been able to get yourself to step into the shower. It’s only a shower. It can’t hurt you, but they can. The memories that drag knives through your skull, leaving you to bleed out on the cracked tile. 
   It’s only memories, only deep scars from your past, but they still haunt you night and day, swearing to come back and swallow you whole with their jagged, sharp teeth — just like a great white shark. 
   Nevermind that you’ve been washing your hair in the sink or scrubbing your body until your skin glows red with the washcloth. You can’t fucking do it, but you’re going to force yourself to try today. You have to. You have got to break this traumatic cycle. 
   You can do this. It’s a shower. Only a shower. 
   Making your way cautiously to the edge of the tub, you glimpse at the metal shower head, fixate on the way it curves and dips and glares back at you with vengeance in its wake. It’s like a monster’s staring right back at you, sneering its sharp teeth and whispering nightmares into your mind. 
   Come and get me, you want to say, but it’s already sunk its razor-sharp fangs into your skin. It’s already bled you dry.
   Swallowing your fears, you stand your ground and narrow your eyes into thin slits, flexing your fingers into tight fists as you look into the face of fear. 
   It can’t hurt you, can’t wrap its long cord around your neck like they tried. But yet, it still can…
   You still feel their icy breaths blowing down your neck, still feel their filthy hands trailing up your skin, still feel the scars they clawed down your back while they had you pinned against the tiled wall. You still feel them inside you, all around you, branding you as their own forever. 
   You’re still theirs. 
   You hear their cackling laughter ringing through your eardrums as you reach for the shower head, stretching your arm through the visions of Garrett and his buddies having their way with you in the bathroom. 
   “Get out,” you mewl, chattering your teeth as you grab a hold of the bottled lavender soap from the side of the porcelain tub. You can’t let them win.
   “Look at you. All scared and helpless, begging for someone to come save you,” Garrett snickers, fisting the back of your hair as another man tears your dress off. 
   “Stop. Please…” you beg, tears streaming down and clouding your vision. “I’m worth more than this. You don’t have to…”
   “What makes you think you’re so special, princess? Nobody’s looking for you. You’re ours until we sell you. And right now? Right now you’re mine.”
   Tears slip from your lash line, falling like raindrops as they hit the edge of the tub. You remember that night so clearly, remember it like it’s happening all over. 
   Your body starts to shake the further you reach for the shower head, making it your mission to push through. But the voices echo in your mind, vibrating down your spine until you actually see their muted faces and narrowed eyes in the reflection of the metal. 
   Push through. Fight. Forget them. They’re not real anymore. But they are still real, and they’re just repeating the cycle with other innocent women that were taken…
   Just as your fingers latch around the shower head, Garrett’s voice booms through your head, ricocheting off the pristine tiled walls. “You’re mine, little whore. I’m not done with you yet.”
   “Get out of my head. I’m not yours!” you scream, dropping the shower head as it bangs a loud clash against the shower walls, startling you like a gunshot just went off. The soap tumbles out of your palm, the bottle opening and spilling lavender liquid all over the bottom of the tub, making messes you can’t get yourself to clean up. 
   You drop to the floor and cover your head with your hands, begging the yelling voices to just stop. But they don’t. They come parading in like a steep hurricane and crash their waves down on you, knocking you off center so they can snake their way into your mind to scream even louder. 
   “Stop, stop,” you whisper as a fallen teardrop hits the edge of the bathtub. And then they just keep coming like scattered storm clouds.
   You can’t fucking do this. You’re not strong enough. You’re not brave. You’re not brave. 
   Footsteps on the floorboards make your fingers curl deeper into your messy hair. You squeeze your eyes shut as the door hits the back of the wall with a loud bang. And now you’re spiraling.
   Garrett. It’s Garrett coming for you. And this time, he wants blood.
   You have to run. You have to get out, you have to leave. 
   “Hey, sweetheart—”
   “No!” you scream out in blind fear, afraid your life is about to flash before your eyes. You start to swing your arm but when you look up, you drop it right back to your side with wide eyes. 
   “Hey, it’s jus’ me. It’s me,” he reassures gently.
   When you look through your tear-stained eyelashes, the world gets a little more quiet. A green flannel fitted against broad shoulders sits before you, his silver-threaded hair glowing from the fluorescent bathroom lights, and those eyes... Those big, brown, syrupy eyes.
   Joel. 
   “Joel…” you whimper out.
   He leans down right beside you and gets on your level, brown eyes locked directly on your teary ones. “S’right. It’s me.” His hand lands on the edge of the bathtub, thumb grazing against the smooth surface. Close enough to feel the heat off his tanned skin. 
   You’re breathless, tears still streaming down your cheek, but he looks like he wants to reach out and wipe them away with the pad of his thumb. 
   “What’s wrong?” he asks, concern lathered all through his soft brown eyes.
   “I was just… I just…” You can’t finish your sentence without cringing at the shift of his shoulders.
   “Take your time, sweetheart,” he says encouragingly.
   He’s always so patient. 
   Taking a deep breath, you make yourself speak quietly. “I just wanted to get a shower. And I just can’t. I couldn’t do it. I can’t…” Tears muddle your vision, and then you’re right back into the pool you were in.
   “Breathe for me,” he coos softly, making your breathing a little easier. “There ya go,” he encourages. “Jus’ take it slow.”
   He takes a long look at the hanging shower head and the spilled lavender soap that runs down the edge of the tub, ending in a small puddle where your fear lies. It’s like he puts two and two together, like he understands exactly what happened. 
   “I made a mess with the soap, I…”
   He stops you right there. “Shh. S’okay,” he whispers. “Let me jus’ help you here, sweetheart.”
   Slowly reaching over, he turns the faucet to warm and lets fresh water run through the tub. He pours more lavender soap in, creating a pool of bubbles that cover the surface of the water. And then he puts the shower head back where it belongs, at a safe distance where it can’t touch you. And you just sit there, watching in silence as he tests out the temperature of the water next. 
   “You’re running a bath for me…”
   He stops for a moment and looks at you with big, warm eyes, looking at you as if you’re in need of saving. “Yeah, I am.”
   Gulping down a lump in your throat, you watch him get back to his task at hand. Stretching his long arms, he cuts the faucet off when the water hits just against the top of the tub. Enough for you to slip in and not spill any water out. 
   He tilts his head back to you and says, “You think you can get in by yourself?”
   Staring at the steam coming up from the warm water, you tremble inside. He drew you a bath when you didn’t have the strength to stand in a shower. He did that. He did it for you…
   Wiping your blurry eyes, you sniffle out. “I think so.”
   He gives you a small smile and then pushes himself up to his feet, nodding to the bath water as he turns the other way. “Go ahead then. I won’t look.”
   You sit there in shambles, still gawking as his broad back stands firm across the room. He’s not even peeking. He’s not trying to look at you. 
   “Sweetheart, s’alright. You can trust me.”
   You can trust me. There’s that word again. Trust. 
   Gradually, you start to pull your t-shirt over your head, cautiously dragging your leggings to the floor and hiding your purple lace underneath the fabric of your shirt. And then your bra unclasps with a snap, leaving you completely bare as you sit in a heap on the cold floor. 
   Turning your head back around, you see he’s still not looking, so you decide to slip under the warmth of the bath bubbles and sink until your body is covered from the breasts down. You pull your knees up to your chest, blanketing yourself with the large bubbles and your arms. 
   “You okay?” he asks.
   “Mhm,” you whimper out.
   “Is it alright if I turn around?”
   Freezing, your body is suddenly ice cold, despite the warmth surrounding your skin. Panic consumes you for a second, but then you remember it’s Joel. 
   He won’t hurt you.
   Balling yourself up even tighter, you make your decision. “Oh. Yeah, I umm. Okay,” you mumble out.
   The shift of his jeans and his boots tiptoeing across the floor makes your mind race, feelings of fight or flight invading your body as you work to steady your fast breath.
   You’re completely naked, stripped raw and bleeding all your insecurities and fears into the lavender soap that envelops the bath. There’s no layers covering you except the thin coating of bubbles and your curled up knees hiding what’s been taken time after time again from you. 
   You shrink yourself further into the tub, curving your back, praying your hair will cover the faded scars that slit you open night after night. You don’t want anyone to see them, can’t even stand to look at them yourself. They’re ugly reminders of what’s happened to you. Just heavy burdens weighing you down, telling you how invaluable and broken you really are. 
   Garrett used to love that… dragging glass through the top of your right shoulder, or just using his teeth to make blood run down your cracked skin. You still feel it. Every lash and bite and cut he gave you. He ruined you just like every other man that touched you in that house. Except he was the worst of them.
   You’re so fucking vulnerable and exposed, and it’s so raw. And you’re just showing all your bleeding shades of red to Joel. 
   When you hear him shift behind you and slightly feel his large presence near the bathtub, you freeze, and then your body starts to shake violently, like you just got dunked below an icy lake.
   “Hey, s’alright. It’s alright, sweetheart,” he coos as he kneels down against the side of the tub. “You’re tremblin’ like a leaf. Are you cold?”
   “N—no,” you whisper, shaking your head back and forth until you believe what you’re saying. It’s warm inside the bath water, but you’re still shuddering like you just got hit with a bucket of ice cold water.
   It’s quiet for a second before he asks, “Is it me? Do you want me to leave?”
   Briefly flicking your teary eyes up at him, you take a long look at his concerned face, embracing those warm brown eyes that you could get lost in. 
   Do you really want him to leave? If he does, that means you’ll be all alone with the roaring thoughts in your head. And you don’t want to be alone. Not really. You want him to stay because the truth is… he makes you feel not so alone. 
   He feels like fresh air.
   “No. I… I don’t want you to go,” you whisper, keeping your eyes locked right on those deep brown pools.
   He gives you a tight-lipped nod and takes a good look at your face, like he can just slip inside your mind and feel everything you’ve ever felt in those last two years.
   “M’not goin’ anywhere, sweetheart. Gonna stay right here. Right where you need me.” His words pull at your heartstrings, stopping the screaming voices in your mind. 
   He said he’ll stay. 
   You… need him. 
   Sitting there curled up in shambles, you don’t move. You just wade in the soapy bubbles and look up bashfully beneath your eyelashes, praying he’ll keep the flashbacks at bay. You don’t know when exactly you grabbed a washcloth, but your knuckles are white from how tight you’re holding on. Maybe it’s helping keep you sane right now.
   Don’t let the memories come flooding back. Keep me from sinking, Joel. 
   His thumb traces along the edge of the tub, while his other grabs the open bottle of lavender soap. And then he looks at you, hesitating before he speaks. He almost looks like he doesn’t know what to say, like he’ll scare you off or say the wrong thing. 
   He could never scare you, you think. No. Never. 
   “Can I?” He tilts his head toward your exposed back, his calloused fingers still skimming the surface while your heart beats sporadically from what he’s asking. 
   Swallowing the words that threaten to spit out, you push them back and nod cautiously, allowing him to take the purple washcloth from your shaking palm. He brushes his calloused skin against yours, and you jump at the contact.
   “Hey, s’okay. I’m gonna be real gentle, sweetheart. You just tell me if it’s too much and I’ll stop.” His deep timbre stops the panic, and all you can do is hang your head lower and focus on the slow deep breathing technique Joel taught you last week.
   “Okay…” you whisper out in a hushed breath. 
   The first touch of the soapy washcloth feels like knives to your skin, carving you up slowly as your body is served to the slaughterhouse. It almost feels like Garrett behind you, cackling as he had his way with you all those times. And when he slides the washcloth down your spine again, you hear a quiet sob escape your lips. 
   You weren’t supposed to show him this side. One that’s so torn apart and abused and broken. You weren’t supposed to show him your scars…
   “Sweetheart, s’alright,” he coos, blowing his warm breath against the back of your head as he stops his slow strokes for just a moment. “You’re safe. I’m not gonna hurt you…” he repeats again slowly, quietly.
   Swiping a falling tear away with the back of your arm, you let him continue. He’s so gentle with every movement, taking care to watch your reactions, back off if something seems too much. He listens to your body language and respects you because he knows how scary this is for you. You don’t want anyone to touch you, but you think this is okay. Because the truth is, you couldn’t do this without him. 
   Slowly brushing your hair to the side, he washes along the back of your neck, gently going over the curve of your shoulders, down your spine, and stopping where your body is submerged. 
   “Tilt your head back for me, sweetheart,” he asks politely, reaching to grab the bottle of shampoo. You do as he says. 
   He fills a little bucket with water and slowly runs it through your hair, until it’s all drenched in warmth. Next, he laces his thick fingers through your hair, scrubbing your scalp to get all the knots and tangles and sweat out. You fight to hold in a low groan, reveling in how good it feels to have his fingers running through your locks in such a gentle way. 
   And he stays there, talking you through it, telling you it’s all okay. And he’s so gentle. Almost like a little lamb with those brown eyes that could soothe you into a deep lull, calm your flying thoughts until you’re just standing still. 
   No one’s ever done this, taken the time to care. You’ve never had someone to do that. He’s doing what no one else signed up to do. 
   But why… why would he do this? You’re nothing. At least that’s what they told you back at the house. That’s what Angela said while Garrett had you pinned to the dining room chair, breathing all down your ear, his teeth dragging until he left marks.
   You shiver in place, teeth chattering even though you’re in warm bath water. But right now you feel like you’re ten feet under a frozen lake, and you need Joel to pull you out.
   The visions of Garrett come rushing back, clouding your better judgement and making you fold over again in fear. 
   Get out. Get out of my head. 
   But you’re right back at that stagnant old house. You’re back in Garrett’s hands…
   Fuck. Why’d you have to remember that night…
   It’d be so easy to slip under the surface of the bubbles, embrace the black seas that would drag you under into oblivion. You could just sink into the warmth, watch the real world disappear along with all your memories. Melt into a peaceful bliss. You could just end it all, but you don’t want that. You want to live, to face your fears, to go on living. You want to be brave. You want… you want… 
   “Sweetheart? What is it?” he asks lightly as he watches a tear break the surface of the water. 
   “I… I just…” You trail off, staring at the shower head, trembling as you remember everything. 
   His eyes follow yours, and it’s like he sees right through your thin layers of red.
   You’re scared. You’re so fucking terrified. 
   Joel knocks you out of your dark mindset, his Southern drawl taking that fear away. “Hey, talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong.”
   “Umm. I…”
   “S’okay if you don’t wanna talk ‘bout it. Jus’ tryin’ to understand what happened so I can help. I want to help. If you’ll let me.”
   You turn his words over and over in your mind, contemplating if you want to let him in. But honestly, talking to Joel does make you feel a little better. And keeping everything bottled up inside is eating you alive, so maybe talking about it will help. Joel will help. He always helps… 
   You take a deep breath and let it all out. “I just… I used to be so independent. I did everything for myself and now? Now I can barely do anything…”
   “Hey. S’alright, sweetheart. You’ll get back to that point one day. You’re gonna be okay.”
   “I don’t feel okay.”
   He stops the slow movements of his wrist, rests the washcloth against the middle of your back. “I know, sweetheart. I know.”
   “He hurt me…”
   The room turns silent, not even the splash of water meets the white noise in the bathroom. That is, until you hear his knuckles flex.
   “What?” he asks in a husky breath.
   “He hurt me,” you repeat, your voice dropped an octave lower.
   “Who, sweetheart? Tell me who hurt you.” He’s attentive, all attention on you, his eyes dark chocolate when they lock with yours.
   “Garrett… The one that sold me. He… he…” Your voice quivers into silence, only the quiet sobs escaping your throat.
   “Hey, s’okay. You’re okay,” he coos. “He’s not here and he never will be again. He won’t touch you again. Ever. And I… Well, I’m not gonna hurt you, sweetheart. I’ll never hurt you. You’re safe now.”
   You’re safe now. You’re safe with him.
   Your eyes drop back down to the bubbles, shining under the fluorescent lights, your hands skimming under the water against your hidden legs. “Back at the house, we weren’t really allowed to take showers alone. Well, not all the girls. One of them just happened to be me…”
   Pausing to flinch, you start again when he doesn’t interrupt. “No matter how much I fought back or screamed or tried to get away, they just held me down against the tile wall. And Garrett was the worst of them, even if he was the one trying to sell me. He was the one that used me the most. Said I was his favorite plaything,” you spit out, sinking your nails deep into your ankles to relieve some of the heartache.
   “Jesus Christ…” His voice drops an octave, and you feel his fingers flex against the washcloth, ringing it dry as he takes his frustration out on it. 
   “And the shower head,” you continue. “They… they umm, did things to me with it. Horrible, awful things.” You see his lips part, eyes widening in horror out of your peripheral vision. He doesn’t like this anymore than you do. “They should’ve just finished me off when they strangled me with it while they had my face pressed against the wall…” You choke on a sob, like you’re reliving that night over right now. You still feel it. The press of the coiled hose wrapped tightly around your neck, choking you as they had their way with your frayed body. 
   Joel sits back on his heels, looking at you like you’re made of glass. Like he’s afraid one wrong word will send you over the edge. “Sweetheart, I… Fuck. M’so sorry that you went through that. That I didn’t get you out sooner. I swear to God if I ever get my hands on Garrett or any of those men, I’m gonna make ‘em pay. They’ll wish they never laid a finger on you. I’m gonna fuckin—” 
   You stop him from going any further. You don’t need him to be the knight in shining armor right now. You just need someone to listen. “You’ve done enough, Joel. You don’t have to. What’s done is done. I’ll never be anything more than something to use to them, and they’ll never change.”
   Staring off into the waves of water, you try to let the bubbles wash your pain away, but another tear slips free, falling down the side of your cheek.
   “Hey, look at me for a second,” he asks softly. You turn to face him all teary eyed, and he catches the tear from falling. His knuckles brush tenderly against your skin for just a second, and then his warmth is gone the second he pulls away. He doesn’t let it linger, but you almost wish he would. His touch is so feather-like. So soft and gentle and warm.  
   He takes a good look at your somber face and sighs, his fingers knocking against the side of the tub. “You never deserved any of that abuse. And I’m sick to death that it happened to you. But you can’t jus’… You gotta keep goin’, sweetheart. You gotta keep livin’. You have so much to give. You’re so full of life and bright and the bravest girl I’ve ever met, and you—”
   “Brave?”
   “S’right, sweetheart. Jus’ like I said the other day in the parking lot. You’re so very brave. And you’ve got a lifetime ahead of you jus’ waitin’.” He stares at the washcloth for a second, but then he’s looking back up at you. “It’s gonna be hard. God, it’s gonna be so fuckin’ hard for a while, but you’re gonna make it. With a little help, you’re gonna soar.” 
   You feel water burn the backs of your eyes, feel like you’re going to implode right now in this bathtub. But you push the fears away and look back up into the soft brown eyes of a man who cares what happens to you. 
   “It’s not gonna be easy, but you’re gonna get through it. You’re gonna have bad days where you feel like you can’t do anything, but those are the days you gotta jus’ take it one step at a time, like today. And those are the kinda days where it’s okay to ask for help. I’m here, sweetheart. I’m here to help, whatever I can with. I jus’ want you to be okay, sweetheart. That’s all I want. For you to live.”
   Your heart clenches in your chest as you gaze into those soft brown eyes. And you just stare with your arms wrapped around your legs, almost want to reach out and graze your fingers through his sandy brown locks. He does something to you. Makes you feel like you’re worth saving. Makes you feel alive. Makes you feel like a human being. 
   He had every chance to take advantage of you in here. He could’ve done anything, but he chose to protect you and take care of you instead. 
   He took care of you. 
   So you continue to stare into those glossy brown eyes, memorizing every speck of gold in his flecked irises. He kinda reminds you of sunshine, warm rays of yellow and orange peeking over the horizon. 
   He reminds you of safety. He’s safe.  
   You shift in the bubbles that cover you, watch as the water breaks against your knees, and then your eyes are back on him just like you’re mesmerized. “How is it that every single particle of me doesn’t want to trust another man ever again, but I trust you?”
   A smile crosses his lips. “You trust me?”
   “Mhm.”
   He takes a good look at you and smiles wider, making his dimple sink into his left cheek. It tugs a little at your heartstrings. “Well then, thank you for trustin’ me.”
   You nod and peek up through your eyelashes, waiting a few seconds before you confess something. “You make me feel safe…”
   His brown eyes delve deep into yours, and his smile still hasn’t faded. “That’s ’cause you are, sweetheart. You’re safe with me. Always. I would rather kill a thousand men than ever lay a harmful finger on you. You’re too special for that, sweet girl. You deserve good things. You deserve the world.”
   His voice sounds like velvet. Smooth, delicate, soft. And even though you’re laid out like bare bones and crumbled dust, he seems to cover all your vulnerabilities and put all your broken pieces back together like glue.
   Somehow, he can knock the breath out of you but also give you an overabundance of oxygen at the same time. He’s good at that. Bringing you life when you feel like you’re getting buried alive. He gives life. Gives you life. And you feel so alive around him.
   You could drown in this bathtub, disappear under the thick sheen of bubbles until the world goes silent, but he wouldn’t let you go so easily. So maybe you’ll just drown in him instead. 
   Silence resonates over the bathroom. Only the longing stares and unspoken words fill the empty void. And it’s so obvious now why every time you stare into those soft brown eyes you fall a little more. 
   That’s it. You’re falling for him. Slowly, cautiously, silently. And maybe one day he’ll catch you, too. Maybe you’ll just fall into his arms one day when you’re a bit braver. Maybe he’ll take the sting out of your bleeding wounds. Maybe he’ll be exactly what you’ve needed all along. 
   But today, you’re not that brave. So you’ll just keep it bottled up like you do most things. For now, you’ll just let the slow burn simmer until it’s an uncontrollable wildfire that bursts into fiery flames. 
   Another few minutes pass by and just as the bath water starts to get cold, Joel asks, “You ‘bout ready to get out, sweetheart?”
   “Yeah. It’s getting a little cold now.”
   “Alright. Well, here’s a clean towel. Gonna put it right here for you.” He sets a fluffy white towel next to the side of the tub and nods his head toward the sink. “And I put your pajamas on the counter for you.”
   “Thank you,” you reply quietly, fascinated by the lengths he goes to make sure you’re taken care of.
   “You gonna be okay?” he asks, his words softening like his gentle brown eyes.
   “I think so,” you nod as a bubble pops around you. 
   “Alright, sweetheart.” He pushes off the floor with a grunt and heads toward the closed door, his hand reaching for the doorknob. “Well, I’ll let you get dried off and changed. I’m jus’ gonna…”
   “Joel?” You stop him before he leaves the room.
   “Yeah?” He turns his head, slicking a hand back through his dark locks.
   “Thank you… for being here for me.”
   A gentle smile meets his lips and a soft chuckle comes out. “Anytime, angel. Anytime.”
   Angel. He called you angel. 
   With one more glance, he’s exiting the bathroom, pulling the door shut behind him. You sink into the tub, letting out a deep breath and closing your eyes. 
   Joel did it. He helped you take a small step forward, helped you face one of your fears. And he didn’t push you, didn’t even nudge you toward the shower head. Instead, he drew you a bath and helped you get through it in one piece. You don’t think you can ever say enough words to thank him for what he did tonight. But deep down, he knows. 
   After drying off and throwing on your pink pajama bottoms and a t-shirt, you run the towel through your wet strands and rake the brush through your locks, already exhausted from the exertion of your shower meltdown. But then relief hits you that you took one step. 
   The first step is always the hardest, and Joel was right there, holding your hand the entire way. He was the reason you made it into the bathtub. And with him, it wasn’t as scary as you thought it’d be. Although, it was still terrifying, but you did it. 
   One step forward, no more back. 
   When you’re slipping under the sheets and about to turn off the bedside lamp, a slight knock sounds across the room, and your head snaps to the closed door, pulling your hand back from the lit lamp. 
   “Come in,” you echo across the big room. 
   The doorknob turns and in comes Joel, hesitantly hovering by the threshold of the open door, a small smile tugging at his lips. “You all settled?”
   “All settled,” you reply, shifting just a smidge beneath the warm comforter.
   “That’s good.” He leans against the doorway, his broad muscles pulling against the flannel fabric, eyes as warm as the first night you saw them. 
   You fidget your fingers around a thin piece of string, flicking your eyes nervously up at the man that stands in the glow of the dim hall lights. A man that helped you face one of your fears. And suddenly, you can’t think of what to say, so you just silently stare up at him until he speaks. 
   “Jus’ wanted to see if you got to bed alright.” He hovers there, big hands in his pockets, rocking back and forth on the heel of his leather boots. 
   “Oh, right. Yeah, guess I made it alright.”
   He nods, giving you another soft smile in return. “You need anything? Water, tea?” 
   Shaking your head, you smile. “No. I think I’m fine. Thank you, though.”
   “Anytime, sweetheart.”
   Another pause and then he’s slowly turning away from you. “Well, uhh. I’ll let you get some sleep, sweetheart. S’been a long day—”
   “Wait,” you stop him and watch him turn back toward you, his eyebrows threaded together, an eager stare masking his face. 
   “Yeah?” he asks, anticipation hanging in the air. 
   This is it. You gulp down a breath, blow one out, and let another fall from your lips. “Joel, I just wanted to say thank you. For… for helping me take that first step of facing something that’s been eating me alive.”
   He nods, the pad of his thumb brushing over his denim jeans. “You were brave doin’ that, you know? After what you’ve been through… That took a lot of guts.”
   “Yeah…” you whisper out, nails digging deep into the blanket over your thighs, but then you flick your eyes up to him. “Not just for that either but also for listening to me. You didn’t have to…”
   “I did have to, though. That’s what you needed. Someone to listen.”
   Your eyes widen, throat tightens up, and you feel the prick of a tear meet your lash line. He wants to listen to you. He didn’t shut you out when you needed to get a little weight off your shoulders.
   Brushing away the tear before it can fall, you give him a look that says how desperate you are to be free from these nightmares that plague your mind. “Maybe if I just… talk about it then maybe it won’t hurt so bad.”
   His face drops, and his big, sad eyes look like a lost puppy who just watched its owner drive off without them. “Oh, sweetheart… I’m always here. I’ll always listen. You jus’ let me know when, and I’ll be right by your side. And Tess will listen. Ya know, when you’re ready, that is. But I’ll be your outlet when you need one.”
   You tug on a little smile, giving everything you have to show him how grateful you are he’s here. If it wasn’t for him, you might’ve been lost to the shadows already. But there he is, trying to pull you into the sunlight. 
   Sunlight. He’s sunlight. 
   “You always seem to know exactly what to say, don’t you?” you say reassuringly, eyes glossy as you look up into pools of warmth. 
   He shrugs his broad shoulders and gives you a crooked smile. “I try, sweetheart.”
   There’s a pause in the room, a silence that’s fallen like snow. You’ve suddenly forgotten how to speak so instead, you lift the blanket higher under your chin and slip down further in the bed, letting a yawn leave your lips. 
   Joel shifts by the door and places a large hand on the handle, about to make his exit. “Well, I’ll let you get some sleep, sweetheart.”
   “Yeah, good idea,” you yawn again, now realizing how tired you actually are. 
   But before he steps out, he turns back and looks at you with those sappy brown eyes you can’t seem to get out of your head. “Oh, before I forget…” He pauses to take a breath. “They might’ve tried to drain you, deplete you of everything inside you, but they didn’t steal it all. You’ve still got your shine, your soul, your heart. And they can’t ever take that from you. You’ve got so much potential in you, and I see it all. You’re gonna glow. I already see that flame in you. S’burnin’ brighter than a wildfire.”
   Eyes as wide as can be, you swallow back a choke and feel your eyes swimming. Did he really just say that?
   Brighter than a wildfire. 
   You open your mouth but nothing comes out. It’s like you’re stunned in place, frozen under a bright spotlight with nowhere to run. Nowhere except maybe to Joel because he’s at the end of the bright light just waiting for you. 
   He’s waiting. 
   “Thanks for seeing that I was worth saving…” you whisper out, still enamored by his kind words, his doe eyes, his beautiful heart. 
   “You’re welcome, angel,” he smiles, his hand still hovering over the doorknob. “Well, good night, sweetheart. Try to get some sleep.”
   “Good night…”
   And then he’s shutting the door softly, leaving you still mesmerized and bewitched by all the events that unraveled this evening. But most of all, you can’t forget every single word he said to you. 
   He sees potential in you, sees it all. He thinks you were worth saving. Thinks you’re gonna glow and shine and thrive. 
   As you rest your head on the fluffy pillow and close your eyes, all you see is Joel. Joel Joel Joel. And he’s the last thing you see before you slip off into a deep sleep. Except he’s still there in your dreams, shining like gold under the sunlight. 
   He’s sunlight. 
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lumarhorrors · 3 days ago
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Absolutely. M!reader deserves his Prince charming! It's gonna be lovey dovey!!
TW: SA MENTIONED
Cw: smut, attempted kidnapping/ success kidnapping
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You had been working for Prince Casper for a few months now after escaping from Prince Roe and his horrible treatment. You were very cautious about working for Casper as you had no clue how he'd treat you but you were definitely shocked went he asked you to do reasonable things like bring his coffee or tea, help him with moving things or even keep him company while you cleaned his office. You'd come to realise Casper actually valued his servants and staff and treated them with respect which you didn't get with Prince Reo.
You were cleaning the windows in Casper's office as he sat at his desk reading. But he was mainly looking at you with a loving smile on his face, he'd always appreciated how you were always so attentive to everything you did. He came up behind and made you sit down saying you needed a break that you were working yourself too hard. You reluctantly agreed and sat down for a bit...until you got bored after 5 minutes and went back to work which Casper wasn't happy about. It was that day you realised he cared about you more that prince reo ever did.
He soon got closer to you. And finally demanded. As nicely as he could that you'd go on a date with him. You obviously said yes. You'd never reject someone as kind and loving as casper. So the two of you went on a simple picnic date in the gardens, it was beautiful. The flowers everywhere, Casper being so loving and warm to you....soon you we put as his personal maid. Then you were his boyfriend, then his fiancee and now his husband and second king of the kingdom next to him.
When Reo found out...Holy hell his kingdom heard all about it. He put serval bounties out for your kidnapping but failed either because you kicked ass or Casper was around or guards. He was mega pissed that he kidnapped you himself. He did whatever he wanted to you....you sobbed and pleaded for him to stop that you felt like you were betraying your husband...he didn't care. When casper stormed the casper and found him on top of you, your mouth gagged and your hands tied to the bed with reo onto of you fucking you....he saw red. He dragged reo off you, untied you and as you were getting dressed dragged the naked Prince out into Reo's kingdom's courtyard and beheaded him. And everyone was glad to be rid of that disgusting monster.
When casper brought you home he kissed you and cuddled you for days and gave you everything you needed to heal. It took awhile for the nightmares to stop but they did eventually.
And during that time casper let you fuck him to distract you and give you control of that sort of thing after what reo did. And you both liked it so much it became a sort of therapy for you. When you had bad or off days casper was their under his desk as you sat in his chair with him sloppily sucking your cock. Spit and cum dripping down his mouth and chin onto the soft red carpets. And you couldn't be more happier with your life.
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I fucking did it!!! I finally finished it after 2 weeks and a half!!!!! I tagged it as Yandere as I want Casper to be one after he beheads Reo as he'd do anything for his husband even killing half the kingdom who wrongs him
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romana-after-dark · 2 days ago
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Our Gentle Sins: Part 10
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Thank you so so so much to @plasticbabies for making this beautiful header!!!! we finally have a good one!
Dark!Logan Howlett x fem!reader
Series Masterlist : Main Masterlist : Logan Masterlist
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Chapter summary: Past. Scott is frustrated that no one listens to him. Present. Once again, no one listens to Scott.
Warnings: This fic features non con, pregnancy, and themes of religious trauma. I will not be saying everything that happens to warm you, by clicking read more you are prepared for extremely dark themes and that you at 18+. You are responsible for your own media consumption.
Before
When Logan was called into Charles's office, he knew it wasn't going to be good.
"Would you care to explain to me why one of my students saw you and Cyclops fighting last night?"
Logan didn't really want to deal with this. He had enough self hatred for whatever he did to make you cry, he didn't need Charles disappointed in him too.
"Are you gonna lecture Scott about it too?"
"I will be talking to him, as well as Remy and Miss Palmer. Fights are something I have to take seriously. What kind of example are you setting for the children?"
As much as Logan wanted to blame it all on Scott, make the little prick pay, he thought back to you. You liked Scott, you'd be upset if Scott got in trouble for you... It was best to just be honest.
"Listen Chuck, it was a mistake, but it wasn't Scotts fault, okay? I saw him messing with her sleeve, showing skin she don't like to show. You know how she is about that stuff." Charles nodded and raised a brow, clearly confused by Scotts actions but not jumping to conclusions. "I saw what he did, and you can't blame me for getting pissed, right? We went out back and fought, Remy broke it up. He only touched her like that because she was hiding... claw marks on back..."
Again, Charles was listening rationally. "And what were they from, son?"
Logan rolls his eyes, groaning. "you know what they were from, but it ain't like that. She came to me when I was having a nightmare and I must've scratched her in my sleep. I didn't even know I cut her until yesterday. Scott and I were both just trying to protect her, okay?"
For a long moment, Charles's eyes simple stayed locked with logan, watching him, searching him. Charles doesn't read minds unless he really needs to, seeing it was a violation of privacy he didn't use lightly.
"I know in the past I've told you i wouldn't tell you what to do, but I'm afraid I'm going to have to put my foot down about you and our young teacher."
He felt like a weight had been dropped on his stomach. "What?"
"I know a romance of sorts has formed, and I do not know how far it's gone nor do I care to. It needs to end. She is a child, Logan. I know she's opened up to you but i doubt she's told you the full story."
You hadn't, he knew, and Logan growled in frustration. "So tell me!"
"That is not my story to tell."
"But you can tell me not to see her? You don't think she can make her own choices?"
"She can't even choose what to make for dinner without crying. She's not at a place where she's ready to date."
But he'd take care of that. Logan would take care of dinner, he'd drive you anywhere and everywhere, he'd make sure you were happy and healthy and taken care of. You didn't need menial choices! You didn't need independence! You needed protection, a caretaker!
"So you just think I'm so fucking awful I'm gonna hurt that hurt, that what you think?"
"That is not what I'm saying."
Logan paused, staring down Charles and heavy breathing as he tried to control his anger. His hands fist the side of Charles's desk, knuckles turning white. He couldn't leave you alone. As soon as he saw you that day with Remy, he was cooked. By the time he got back to the mansion with you giggling at his side, Logan knew there was no future for him without you.
"Charles." Logan grinds out, jaw clenched. "I'm not going to hurt her. I love her."
At that, Charles softened a tad. "I know, son. But this is for the best. There are plenty of women here, women in this world that you could choose from. Why do you have to pick those you can't have?"
He was referencing Jean, of course.
"It's... not like that..."
You were different. You were soft and gentle and happy. You were kind and loving and you wanted him, him and only him. There was no Scott getting in the way. There were no powers, no mutations. Just a sweet girl who needed him to protect you. You were different from Jean.
"Logan, I'm sorry. But this is how it must be. I know you wouldn't intentionally hurt her, but she is fragile. For the record, I would say this if it was Scott, Remy, or Kurt. This is about her, not you."
Logan didn't believe that for a second, storming out the door and right past Scott who was waiting for his turn to speak to Charles.
After
God, this felt good.
The Monday after the schools prom.
2 days after Logan finally made love to you the way he wanted to, the way you deserved.
This morning, Logan walked you to your first class, your arm looped around his. You wore a tight dress for the first time in months to show off the pregnant stomach that swelled with his baby. His baby was growing inside you. The hallways hushed saved for the murmurs of students and teachers as he showed you off, both of you smiling. The secret was out. You were making your public debute.
Logan spotted Scott standing next to Jean, their conversation halted as he lead you to your classroom.
"Have a good day, dollface. I'll see you at lunch."
You beamed up at him in his arms. "You too Lo. I love you."
Then, making direct eye contact with Jean and then Scott, Logan took your chin in his hands and gave you a deep, open mouthed kiss. He heard a whistle from a student, but he didn't care as he slid his tongue inside you.
Scott stormed off, leaving jean behind. No doubt he was on his way to tattle to Charles now that he was back from his several month trip.
*
"I'm fine, Mr. Xavier. Really. Logan is good to me." You sat in front of your boss at his office. Scott had brought the new development to Charles immediately of course, and now you were being questioned. Logan had told you that Charles had instructed him to stay away from you, and now it was your job to convince him that everything was okay. For the sake of raising your baby in a two parent, loving and stable household, you'd omit how this happened, exactly. you'd push away your fears and focus on the man Logan had shown you he could be, not the version you worried was still lurking inside.
"Miss Palmer, Scott seems extremely worried. He is concerned that Logan has forced you into something or has harmed you in some way."
You resist the urge to vehemently defend Logan the way you had to Scott, but remember that that only served to make him more suspicious. Instead, you settle for indignation. "Mr. Xavier," You say in your best offended tone. "Logan loves me. he would never hurt me. he's not like Mark and frankly, I don't appreciate Mr. Summers throwing accusations around wildly. I thought after the incident at the dance where he was proven wrong, he would leave us alone, but he seems obsessive."
A small smile on Charles's face. "And you're aware of their history?"
"Yes, I am very aware. Mr. Summers won back Ms. Grey, so I don't understand why he can't just let Logan be happy. He's not a bad person, you know this. He's a good man, and he watches out for me."
A short pause. "Yes, I am aware Logan is a better man than Scott seems to think. If you would allow me to see into your mind, I can clear-"
"No." You say a little too quickly. Charles didn't force his way into peoples minds. You'd given him permission when you first met him so that he could see what happened to you, see what you did and why you felt no remorse for it. You would not allow that again, knowing what he'd see. He'd see Logan raping you, but he'd never understand why you defended him. He couldn't understand what you saw in Logan, the hope to put it all behind you and start new. "Forgive me, but I'm a private person. There are things I keep to myself."
He nods. "I understand. It seems, however, that you are quite distressed. I can sense it radiating off you. You have to understand my concern."
"Maybe my distress has to do with being raised in a cult, becoming a child bride and being beat for 7 years because i couldn't have a child which I was told was my only purpose in this world?"
Your words hung in the air, tension laced the nervous shuffling in your seat. You place a hand over your stomach. "I apologize, Mr. Xavier. Hormones. I-" You sigh, standing up. "We have an appointment, I have to go." You don't tell him it's your first appointment. You don't tell him you haven't seen a doctor because for the first 3 months you were convinced you would have an abortion. You didn't tell him Logan has to practically drag you here after everything you'd experienced from doctors before.
Charles watches you leave. "Don't be afraid to talk to me, child. We were here to help you. We won't fail you the way you have been failed before."
You almost laugh at that. "Please stop insinuating my boyfriend abuses me. That's how you can help." You open the door to see Logan right where you left him, waiting for you with worry in his eyes.
"Everything okay, Dolly?" He hugs you, eyes connecting over your shoulder to Charles.
"Yeah, everything's fine Lo. Let's go to the appointment."
*
"You can't fucking be serious!" Scott shouts as Remy leaves Charles's office. Scott insisted Charles speak to Remy, that surely her best friend would know something. But when Remy opened the door, and Charles said he's found nothing to suggest you are being harmed, Scott was infuriated.
Charles rolled over to where Scott and Remy stood. "She is insistent she is fine, and everyone we've spoke to says Logan never even raises his voice around her."
"But- months ago, something happened! She wasn't eating, the nightmares-" He gestures to Remy. "You said her nightmares got worse!"
Remy shrugs. "Lovers spat, Cher. She said they worked it out after she found out she was pregnant. It makes sense she's under stress right now, pregnancy outside of marriage is a shameful thing where she grew up."
Scott groans in frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose. "So you don't think it's suspicious she's pregnant? You don't think it's weird she's having sex this soon after leaving all that?"
"Cyclops." Charles warns, but Scott is just looking at remy now. How can he not see it?
Remy glares at Scott. "If you are suggesting Logan raped her you better come prepared to back that up other than this pissing contest between the two of you."
"It's not-"
"Accusing someone of rape is a big fucking deal you can't be throwing around. Last time you accused Logan of clawing her, you looked stupid so I would hope you have something more this time. Well, Scott, what do you have? What grand evidence is there that you can't just let them be happy?" When Scott didn't speak, Remy laughed. "Just as I thought, nothing. Go home to your wife, Scott."
Remy left the room, leaving Charles and Scott alone.
"You can't be serious, Charles."
The older man sighed, looking to his protégé. "Son, you know i respect your opinions and concerns. If you have any evidence-"
Scott heard enough, and stormed out. He wasn't crazy. he wasn't jealous. He didn't hate Logan simply because he fucked his wife. Okay well maybe that was the start. But this? This was wrong. You need help, even if you can't see it.
*
"Look so good like this, baby doll..." Logan mumbled into your neck. You and him laid on the couch watching Gladiator, but the movie was long forgotten. Who was Russel Crowe compared to Logan Howlett? He was hard against you, his cock pressed up against your ass underneath the blanket you insisted on because you were wearing a skirt, his arm wrapped around your middle, caressing your stomach. he was obsessed with your stomach, wanted to touch you there every chance he could.
"Logan, the movie," You giggle but make no attempt to stop as he kissed your neck. You loved the attention. You loved his gentle touches. You were nervous about having a baby, but Logan assured you every step of the way.
The appointment last week had gone well. You told the doctor you hadn't known you were pregnant, that it was a surprise, so he made sure to do a thorough check since you were 4 months along. You hadn't seen a doctor in all that time, but you had been eating well and Logan had brought you prenatal vitamins. Doctor said everything looked normal and healthy, thank god. You hadn't wanted this, not this way anyway, but you'd never forgive yourself if you somehow messed up your child's life with your indecision.
Logan's hands roamed your body under the blanket, humming against your skin. "My pretty wife... my perfect girl..." Logan had said he'd propose, that you and him were gonna get married... you were going to be a wife again. Logan's wife. he'd be different. This time would be different. You'd given logan a baby, so he had no reason to hurt you like Mark had.
"My husband..." You sigh, grinning ear to ear.
"You two are disgusting." Remy spoke, and you suddenly remembered he was in the chair, supposed to be watching the movie with you and Logan. You quickly grab Logan's hand away from where it was about to slide up your skirt, and sit up with a deep blush. Logan had promised to spend more time with Remy, you wanted them to be good friends. They were already casual friends long before you knew either one, but you wanted them to be closer. Remy was your family, the person other than Logan you spent the most time with. You had other friends now, Rogue and Ororo, and you and Emma had even begun to hang out, but Remy was your number one. He was the only person other than Logan and Charles you'd told about your past in full, although you suspected Scott knew from Charles.
Logan sat up with you, but didn't let you go, instead sitting you between his legs on his lap. His hands stayed far more decent now.
"Sorry..." You mumble, but Remy is smiling.
"Don't worry pistache, I'm just happy to see you finally together."
You tried to focus more on the movie, and not Logan's throbbing erection still nuzzled against you and how you were going to take care of it later. Everything was going fairly well. Logan slept in your room most nights, but sometimes you'd wake up to find him gone. Those were nights he had nightmares, so he got up and went back to sleep in his own room. If he was in a bad headspace he'd sleep away from you too, to not risk hurting you again.
Your nightmares, however, would not stop. Nearly every night you woke up in Logan's arms as he tried to gently wake you, the horrors of what you dreamed of still sharp and brutal in your mind. You couldn't understand why they hadn't stopped, why Logan's faded to less and less while yours increased. You were supposed to be in love. your happy ending with a husband and a baby... so where was the happy?
"Well, well, well, look who finally escaped the throuple from hell." From the doorway of the common room, and glib voice pulled everyone's attention to were Wade stood. You'd never met him, but you'd seen a few pictures here and there. He was someone Logan actually liked, and in his very minimalist decor of his room, there was a small framed picture of him and Wade Wilson together. Next to it now sat a picture from your first ultrasound.
"Shit, Wade" You can here the smile in logan's voice. "I didn't know you were coming."
Still grinning, Wade shrugged. "Yeah, well, I might have caused a few issues with the Time Variant Authority. Gross misuse of a time traveling device to save my girlfriend and all that. Gonna lay low for a bit, figured I'd come see you and my favorite piece of Cajun spiced ass."
Remy got up from his chair to greet Wade in a big hug. "Nice to see you too, asshole."
Logan spoke again. "I'd get up to say hi, but I'm pretty sure my dick would be saying hi too."
"Logan!" You admonish, face burning in embarrassment as your lover whispered a half-hearted apology in your ear.
"Oh-ho-ho, trust me peanut I would not be complaining." Wade looked to you. "And just who is this pretty piece of pumpkin pie?"
"Watch it, mouth." Logan growled behind you. "She's mine." Him calling you his made you warm up even more, as if the display every single morning as he walked you to class didn't say that enough.
"I see that!" Wade is nearly chuckling, a twinkle in his eye. Logan went to Wade's right after Jean chose Scott over him, so Wade was very aware of everything he'd been through. No doubt he was happy to see his friend in a better position. "No more crawling back to Jean and Scott like a lost wolvie?"
"I never fucked Scott you goddamn twink"
"Sure you didn't." Wade lifted himself off where he leaned against the wall, walking towards where you sat. You were raised to be polite, so much to Logan's grumbling you stood up. Logan covered his pants with the blanket. "Wade Wilson." He extended his hand. "And you are?"
"Judith Palmer." You gave him your fake name.
"My fiancé." Logan asserts from the couch.
With the blanket off, your pregnant stomach was on full display, and Wade's eyes nearly bugged out of his head looking at you.
"Good golly miss molly, she sure as hell is! Fucking hell, I've been in need of a good tea spill sesh, this is just the right time." A deep breath and a dreamy sigh, Wade looked between you, Logan, and Remy as he crossed his arms, grinning. "So tell me, how did all this happen?"
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Sorry it took so long to update!!!! I've been, frankly, very sick. If you havnt seen my posts, I spent one weekend literally friday to monday laid up, so lethargic i couldn't lift my arms sometimes. I have an amazing roommate whose in nursing school who i love dearly who took care of me.
two weeks later im still sick. Not lethargic and feverish but bronchitis now :( suffering.
And i still have school to catch up on.
but i finally got a better laptop thanks to black friday sales which has made doing stuff fast without lagging and crashing unexpectedly.
so, WELCOME WADE WILSON!!!!!!
And scott, poor scott. I've been telling my friend whose not a fanfiction reader about this series and shes been helping me with things, she says the fact that scott is the only one who sees something is wrong and no one is listening to him is "biblically accurate scott summers" LMFAOOOO
We're probs not gonna meet all the xmen, even the ones i actually know. Idk if we'll even see kurt again. but they are around! scott, remy, and wade will be the biggest piece.
thanks so much for all the love!!!
@multiversed-daydreamer @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @del-ightfulling @miraclesabound @hindi-si-ikay @samsamsantos @madamerubrum @shybluebirdninja a @hornystan @rogueinmymind @accountforreading123 @yawnetu @princessanglophile @and-claudia @new-genesis1000 @teaganthemorningstarr @oldloganslittleslut @zaggprincess2 @bugsinmyeyez @groundclueless @cosmolight
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wardensantoineandevka · 1 month ago
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I've been wondering this since the premiere last week with starting to get a sense for the kinds of characters here, but after seeing the actual Ship's launch, I continue to have the question: does the Ship.... have a captain? It has a boatswain, which is great and important, but a boatswain isn't a captain.
like, please don't tell me these people are going to, very idealistically and nobly but naively, try to run this crew and this operation—and all its potential dangers and fatal threats—as a completely flat organization. please don't tell me they're going to do the very common and well-intentioned but often ill-advised for this situation "we'll simply defer to whoever's expertise is most relevant." I've seen many a group irl do this, as a person who loves stories about expeditions and voyages I've seen this trope / arc many times. I am holding your hands, all of you, please, I worry about your operating procedure in times of dire urgency and duress. you need an executive officer. you need a captain. you think you don't, but you will. there will come a moment when you will.
frankly, given the broad types we're getting in these episodes and the way the crew moves and the way that many of them seem to orient around him, it may naturally fall to Merlin. it may even do so when the moment is desperate and dangerous. there is possibility others will look to him for direction before he considers it himself. unfortunate for him, if so. (I say "unfortunate" because to find that this falls to you and to be asked to rise to task is always difficult.) if it does come to him, hopefully he finds that he is of level head and steady hand enough to do it well and of stalwart heart enough to bear what the role demands.
but, given what they're setting off to do, they're going to need a captain. if they don't have one, there will come a time that someone will be asked to step up to it. and, taking stock of where things are setting themselves up, I do wonder if Merlin will have to find it in himself to do it.
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undertale-fic-librarby · 5 months ago
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Melatonin
A FluffyNight drabble to celebrate reaching 50 followers on this account. It's pretty short & not beta read, but I think it's alright for being written in one sitting. Happy reading!
Beep! Beep! Beep! The sound of Ccino's alarm forced him awake, pulling him out of the pleasant dreams he had been having. Even now, Ccino could feel them slipping from his skull, leaving him wondering what exactly he had been dreaming about.
The continued beeping of his alarm pulled him from his thoughts & Ccino groaned, pushing his face into his pillow. Blindly reaching for it, Ccino attempted to turn it off without looking, knocking his hand against the other things on the nightstand before finally managing to push the button to silence it.
Blissful quiet filled the room as Ccino felt Nightmare shift next to him. Arms wrapped around him & pulled him close, holding Ccino close to Nightmare. Ccino smiled sleepily, turning on his side so he faced towards the other. He hummed quietly as he observed Nightmare looking back at him with a lidded socket, an annoyed expression on his face.
"Sorry, did I wake you?" Whispering so as to not ruin the atmosphere, Ccino questioned worriedly. Nightmare shook his head & moved slowly, readjusting them both until they were situated comfortably against each other.
Ccino smiled wider & closed his sockets, holding the other in his arms. Together in each other's arms, they both quietly drifted back to sleep.
Bonus scene!
A shrill beeping jolted them both back awake, causing Ccino to jump in Nightmare's arms. Grumbling to himself, he slowly sat up & reached over to the alarm, shutting it off.
Sitting up properly, Ccino stretched his arms above his head & groaned as he heard his joints pop, rubbing the bottom of his sockets with one hand. Picking up his phone & turning it on, his sockets widened in shock as he let out a loud, "Shoot!"
Scrambling & throwing the blanket off of himself, Ccino barely noticed as Nightmare sat up in alarm. "Is everything alright?" Ccino stammered out a reply, mild panic in his voice as he began changing out of his pajamas.
"Everything's fine! We just overslept a bit!" Relaxing slightly, Nightmare observed as Ccino got ready for the day, rushing around quickly so he wouldn't be later than he already was. If he concentrated, he could swear that he heard the meows of hungry cats impatiently calling for their breakfast.
Hastily walking over to Nightmare, having gotten dressed quickly, Ccino leaned over & placed a chaste kiss against his lovers cheek, smiling. "Love you, see you later!" With that he exited the room, leaving Nightmare sitting alone on the bed with only a warm imprint of where Ccino laid as company.
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unionizedwizard · 7 months ago
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poisoned book investigation update: i reached the part of queen margot that deals with the poisoned book and this only made me more convinced that this is indeed. what happened. back in 2010. because 1) i know my mother well and therefore know she would kin catherine de' medici (yes yes i know. i know. what can i say. she's insane. it's a family tradition) 2) in the novel, the book was poisoned by catherine herself (she conceived and carried out both the scheme and the execution herself), and meant to kill her political enemy and son-in-law (but ended up poisoning (and killing) her own son). the exact method of course would be unsuitable for my own mother to imitate as it is the exact same method used in the name of the rose (possibly where umberto eco got the inspiration from, actually?), therefore as i mentioned earlier impossible to recreate with the kind of paper my copy of the three musketeers was printed on. but. yeah. not that i had many doubts at this point anymore but this is really. convincing evidence. psychologically speaking.
like for the. catherine de' medici kin part:
my mother always loved her as a historical figure. we did visit a lot of historical castles and museums and all when i was a kid and she always had a marked preference for 1) the renaissance era and history 2) the medici family 3) catherine de' medici specifically. she admired her cunning and force of spirit and ambition and influence. #1 girlboss supporter (she did not support the. you know. religious massacres tho. she didn't think catherine was a great figure to emulate or whatever. but she admired her nonetheless)
as i've mentioned before, my mother has always been a wannabe italian. she's especially fond of the italian renaissance and in particular florence and its history. in the novel the fact catherine de' medici is florentine is a key part of her characterization
physically there seems to be a similarity? dumas doesn't actually describe his characters' appearance much, but from the few elements we get, it seems to fit (= pale, grey(?) eyes with a cold and cunning look, short and stout but pretty, white hands (that she takes great care of), short and stout (fat?) stature in general, blonde hair, small lips, imposing presence that makes other people immediately fall in line & scares them (she was very proud of that)). it's not much but knowing her she would jump to conclusions and want to really. Be Like Her
sorry i know how this sounds i KNOW you don't have to believe me but i swear this is all true. inherited insanity and all that. the true Drow Ass Family
#sorry it still hasn't fully. been. processed i think.#i mean at some point how. do you let that sink in. 'that' being 'my mother tried to poison me in a narratively-meaningful way when i was 11#the poisoned book saga#<- tag if you don't understand what the fuck i'm talking about and want to read up on the whole thing.#i do wonder how much time she spent planning and all like. 10 years old me listening intently to her lectures about catherine de' medici#in Blois castle and all the Loire castles (we visited them all over the course of summer 2008 i think). like <- clueless#she did always enjoy putting on a show and scattering tragic irony and double entendres and foreshadowing elements........#thank you mother for trying so bad to kill me that you inadvertently ended up making me become your number one nightmare: a poet.#... just like catherine de' medici tried to kill henri de navarre to prevent him from becoming the king despite The ProphecyTM#only to inadvertently kill her own son and therefore making him become the king Earlier Than Anticipated.#IT'S FUN HOW IT WORKS ISNT IT. THE NARRATIVE MOTHER. THE NARRATIVE!#saying that because i am not completely insane (yet) and the whole. fighting against a prophecy thing? is something that they did For Real#which i got from their OWN ADMISSION when i was 17. btw. not something i made up or anything. they literally are like that.#i inherited the Perception Of The Narrative And Fate And Its Patterns And Cycles. as a family curse. this is very much a literal&cold fact.#anyway.
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cassynite · 10 months ago
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autumn-applepie · 7 months ago
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University ever pushes you so low you have to go buy a couple of beers? /srs/neg
I'm gonna vent in the tags for a moment humor me for once /gen
#No but I'm serious this place is a nightmare /neg#Venting in the tags#humor me for a second. you go to this uni and they promise you a place that will teach you how to become an artist#on both like. morality and skill level. they feed you with bullshit for MONTHS. “oh mistakes are fine! they make you grow!”#or “oh this is a community we work all together there are no discriminations this is a safe place to learn and improve”#and we like. work on this projects - THAT WE ARE NOT PAID TO WORK FOR SO *WE* GET TO PAY FOR ALL THE MATERIALS AND SHIT FOR THEM.#to like “help the community” or whatevrr because “artists are born to inspire others and bring joy” and blah blah blah. BUT. LIKE. THE THING#THE THING IS. NONE OF THESE PROJECTS WILL END UP ON OUR CURRICULUMS. WHAT WE WORK 6-7 YEARS FOR ARE NOT SEEN AS REAL EXPERIENCES.#AS IF WE'VE DONE LITERALLY NOTHING FOR 6-7 YEARS. AND LIKE. THE PROFESSORS ARE SO RACIST AND DISCRIMINATORY AS WELL.#If they don't like you they WON'T EVEN GIVE YOU THE EXAM. BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY TO DEMONSTRATE IF YOU WORKED OR NOT. IT'S UP TO THEM.#THEY DECIDE EVERYTHING FOR EVERYONE AS IF WE ARE SOME SORT OF FUCKING COMMUNIST KINDA BULLSHIT WORKERS.#Someone fucks up? *WE* FUCK UP AND EVERYONE PAYS. Someone succeeds? *WE* SUCCEED AND EVERYONE GETS THE CREDITS.#THIS IS ALSO WHY NONE OF THE WORKS WE DO END UP IN OUT CURRICULUM BECAUSE ITS MADE SO THAT *THE UNIVERSITY COURSE* DID IT AND NOT *US*.#IT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT AND I CAN'T EVEN GET OUT OF THERE BECAUSE IF I DO MY PARENTS WILL KICK ME OUT CUZ THEY DON'T WANT ME TO BE AN ARTIST#So I'm trying to STUDY for the exams and the “professors” are getting mad at me that I'm not staying 10 HOURS IN THAT MOTHERFUCKING ART LAB.#WORKING AT THEIR NONSENSE PROJECTS THAT WILL NOT END UP IN MY CURRICULUM.#“Oh if you're not willing to put all your efforts for the course this is not the place for you” BITCH I *AM* PUTTING ALL MY EFFORTS!#THIS EXAM IS *LITERALLY* PART OF THE COURSE!! WHAT KIND OF FUCKING BULLSHIT ARGUMENT IS THAT!!!!!#Istg I'm gonna cry I want to kms /NOT SERIOUS#I'm gonna cook dinner. chug my lemon beer. and try to study like a normal person and beg this shit will end soon#Don't worry I'm not going to become an alcoholic I just need something. anything and I'm ABSOLUTELY not gonna start smoking I hate it /srs#tw alchohol mention#alcohol mention#tw smoking mention#smoking mention#vent#tw vent#// mike speaks
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landfilloftrash · 4 months ago
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shoutout to my girl eno’s nightmare bc. Hi! What and/or Who the fuck was that ! its gonna haunt her and i for awhile !
#my art#its a shitpost batman#Pirate Campaign#Enososin Folook#rea rambles in the tags#OK SO LIKE IT KINDA TOLD ME WHAT/WHO IT WAS BUT IT ALSO DIDNT? YKNOW? LIKE—#it started off with normal dream stuff and then devolving into fear/nightmare stuff and ‘wtf is this who are you why are you in my house’#but then the whole argument shifted when the thing posing as Rollo— bc it WAS an outside force— said “i am his rage i am his guilt’’ etc.#and i could FUCKING FEEL ENO IN MY HEAD RELAX SO GODDAMN FAST. STILL ANXIOUS BUT JUST. ‘Oh. Is that all?’#‘Well what i’m about to do is still incredibly stupid but i feel much better about how it will go now’#AND IT WORKED. WONDER OF WONDERS. AND THEN FUCKING AFTER THAT WHEN I WAS HUGGING THEM.#the ‘creature’ for lack of better terms EXPLICITLY said “of course you are one who can calm my rage— you who was raised by the one#whom i love the most’’ and HI. HELLO. THERE ARE SEVERAL WAYS I COULD TAKE THIS SENTENCE ENTITY-OF-INDETERMINATE-EVERYTHING.#ROLLO. DAD MAN. BELOVED GOLIATH WHOM I TRUST WITH MY LIFE AND THAT SCARES ME.#I HAVE QUESTIONS. SEVERAL ACTUALLY. WILL WE EVER ASK THEM? PROBABLY NOT!!!!!!!!#BUT IM *SO* CURIOUS. WAIT A MINUTE. WHO *ARE* YOU??????????#final shoutout to the fact that both times I have tried/thought about casting a vaguely aggressive spell. to someone who was#threatening me/eno. it has not *worked!!* and I have had to use my THINK THONKING BRAIN AND DO A STUPID MOVE!!!!!#aka roleplay and use way too much compassion. *I WONDER WHY SHE'S SO INSISTENT THAT IT'LL WORK STRANGE ENTITY I CALMED BY HUGGING*#they were also INCREDIBLY insistent that I don’t die. Peacefully/trying to help someone that is. Full of rage like a supernova ?#only acceptable way to go apparently /lh /very aff (<- already attached to this strange person I DONT KNOW)#ok ok im done /jov#shut UP rea#rea's trash
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palebloodpresence · 2 years ago
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what if i said my genuine opinion of "rom the vacuous spider" is that she's actually not like, peaceful because she's stupid, she's just extremely fucking chill bc she's so enlightened. like she WILL defend herself but really she just wants to hide in her cool lake world and hide dark rituals
#idk i have crazy amount of thoughts on rom lately (makes a post thats half tags) (im sorry in advance)#like that she was blessed by kos.... now how you interpret HER and her relationship w the fishing hamlet may vary but like#kos strikes me as sympathetic towards humans (who are not hunters. it is the HUNTERS nightmare. though ive always wondered)#(why are there research patients there? what did THEY do?)#(anyway. idk i like to think that rom was very kind (if a bit. dumb maybe? but like tbh thats so subjective.) and thats why kos blessed her#thats extremely cheesy and sappy for bloodborne ikik but like. ye#though ive also seen other theories on how she might have ascended that ARENT related to kos giving her eyes#or ones that focus on the cut content abt kos being ebrietas's name at one point in development#which has VERY different implications (+ tbh? more likely#ebrietas has a more confirmed affinity for helping humans and also the whole 'altar of despair' grieving#(which re the character model: tbh i think its MEANT to be rom#but they didnt design it very accurately)#anyway thats all thank u for coming to my impromptu ted talk#OH WAIT edit i forgot to add i think we should consider WHO is calling her vacuous. the brygenwerth scholars? we know SO little about#1. who she was#and 2. where she earned this title. for fucks sake shes not even that spider shaped. whos to say this moniker is accurate?#not trying to start shit. i would love her even if no thoughts head empty#but like i hc her as niceys idk
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chemicalbrew · 1 year ago
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achievement get (for the billionth time): take one look at an assignment and get severely overwhelmed AND discouraged for the rest of the day and do nothing
#it's so much and it's dishonest work!! literally dishonest because all i can think of is how bullshit a lot of it sounds. instead of#you know?#actually learning anything?#but this thorough lack of motivation is just gonna get me in trouble isnt it. how do i swallow my emotions and figure things out#its getting harder every year and the feeling that the few people i have close by do not ever truly understand - like at all - is horrifyin#yes sorry this is all i could think of for the past six hours. im having a great day (no im not. i also hate myself for feeling this way)#zero.txt#im sure it hurts the few people who care and who thought i'd actually go on to do things to see me constantly wallowing for reasons#that they refuse to comprehend or have compassion for.#just stop being sad! just get to work piece by piece! have some resilience#meanwhile all ive done is cry. maybe a part of me just likes feeling like this i DONT KNOW#and ofc so often im like. the only reason im still around is im quiet and they havent invented thought police#yet.#how can i have hope when the moment i decide to pluck a silver of it out of my core i read something that in a better world would not even-#-be a nightmare#like. you say things like that with your mouth and expect us to mindlessly repeat if we want anything in life...#fuck my stupid baka life <3#ugh im just going in yet another circle now when i know trying to put my feelings in words is not helpful. what IS helpful#negative#again sorry. at least you dont have to open this wall of tags#delete later#maybe
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pepprs · 1 year ago
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i know i need to shut up abt it esp bc i don’t know for sure if i actually got exposed to covid but like. it’s just so fucking frustrating and terrifying. not just in the case of covid but with other things too like driving. you can take every precaution to keep yourself and the people around you safe but all it takes is one selfish careless asshole who can negate that in a heartbeat and ruin your life or maybe even end it in some circumstances. lol
#purrs#ask to tag#complete and utter despair about it all. i feel like such a freak for telling everyone to be safe and be careful all the time but this world#is so fucking scary and we are so fucking helpless. how can i not cast out this desperate fucking plea. this prayer. that harm will not#befall you even if it’s something as small as a drive to the store or a trip to a new place. i just live in fear of the people i love#getting hurt all the time and of myself getting hurt. and covid is fucking scary because we still don’t fuckng know how bad it is really or#what it can do to you in the long term and there’s no way to know if you have it until you find out you have it bc this fucking nightmare#country gutted all the covid infrastructure so it’s like. it’s just really bad. im so scared. ive been so proud of myself lately bc i feel l#like even though im still not doing great ive been less miserable and anxious like a couple months ago i was having breakdowns almost daily#and i feel like ive been getting better and this just has thrown me so bad. there are other things going on too ofc so i know im reacting#really strong but like. throwback to all the asks i just answered where anons were like idk how you even function witb the amount of anxiety#you carry with you all the time and i was reading that like but not anymore! and it turns out… no it’s still there. it just was summer and#i interacted with fewer people and went almost nowhere. and now the semester is starting again and everything is changing and it’s just. bad#also addendum to the first part of my tags: i wish i was brave enough to ask ppl to like. text me when they get to their destination safe or#whatever. i almost never think of it bc it just seems like such a forward boundary crossing thing to do + it was a bad habit from when my#separation anxiety was MUCH worse as a kid. but like… i want o do it and sometimes i need to but i repress it so hard. lawl#also to say i love you sometimes. some ppl it’s really easy and we do it all the time. others i can’t bc it crosses boundaries and it#physically hurts not to. lolll
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kalashtars · 7 months ago
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lol lmao when the people in your performance group project didn't prepare AT ALL for anything so now you have to attempt to edit what you filmed into something vaguely watchable and it's Not Working
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1moreoffkeyanthem · 8 months ago
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Ok yeah I’m gonna break my own heart doing a part 3 to TWITR like y’all thought No Strings Attached was a heart wrenching sequel? Just wait
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ln4smiamitrophy · 6 months ago
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𝐌𝐘 𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐄 𝐈𝐍 𝐀 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐄𝐓𝐈𝐌𝐄
𐙚 summary; the one where lando norris shamelessly obsesses over his girl in her instagram comment section
ʚɞ pairing; lando norris x reader
ᡣ𐭩 fc; emma brooks
⭒ type; smau
⟡ a/n; first post , just something basic to test the waters. lowkey why are these so fun to make?
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, yourbff and others
y/nusername felt cute, might delete later lol
comments…
yourbff never seen someone so sexy
⤷ y/nusername seems kinda narcissistic to be talking about yourself in that way
user1 patiently waiting for lando to once again be mclaren’s worst pr nightmare
⤷ mclaren we dread y/n post (we love you y/n, lando not so much)
⤷ landonorris hey!!
user2 hi mommy 😍😍
user3 the best wag (not clickbait)
lilymhe marry me?
⤷ y/nusername yes!!!
⤷ alex_albon guess i’ll go fuck myself
⤷ y/nusername good idea
landonorris sit on my face. i’m begging you
⤷ y/nusername it’s not even been a day
⤷ landonorris and i can’t wait any longer. this is torture
user4 i just know lando is giggling and kicking his feet rn
⤷ oscarpiastri he is. he… literally is
landonorris please never delete this 🙏🏼🙏🏼
georgerussell63 y/n what have you done to this man? he’s been staring at this post for the past 5 minutes
⤷ user5 he’s not the only one
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y/nusername sweet treat
comments…
user1 i didn’t think you could get any more attractive, guess i was wrong
⤷ user2 we all were
oscarpiastri why did i just witness lando see this and then excuse himself to his driver room? i’m traumatised
⤷ user3 BAHAHAHA 😭😭 poor osc
⤷ user4 this post was all too much for little lando norris
francisca.cgomes smash 😍🔥
⤷ y/nusername come over babygirl
landonorris my sweet treat
*liked by y/nusername*
landonorris google, how does one become a lollipop?
⤷ maxverstappen1 lando do you forget this is public? everyone can see this?
landonorris @mclaren cancel my meetings please, something has come up
⤷ y/nusername go to your meetings mister, i’ll be waiting for you at home
⤷ landonorris yes ma’am 🫡
⤷ mclaren sigh, i’m too tired for this
⤷ user5 poor mclaren admin, they’ve been through so much
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liked by landnorris, georgerussell63 and others
y/nusername let's play mermaids
comments...
yourbff not the toes on show
⤷ y/nusername no mermiads for you hoe
carmenmmundt beautiful girl
⤷ y/nusername ily <3
landonorris why are you at the beach!? it's raining, you're gonna catch a cold!! you look gorgeous as always but stay wrapped up please, i don't wanna have to deal with sick y/n
⤷ y/nusername these are from like a week ago lan... you were there when i took them... you took them...
⤷ landonorris oh yeah 😅
user1 mother is mothering
alex_albon lily wanted me to ask you when you're next brunch date is...
⤷ y/nusername omg, soon! i promise
carlossainz55 surprised at how tame lando's comment is
landonorris i need you, every way possible, right now. i'm struggling over here love
⤷ carlossainz55 nevermind... you gotta stop doing this publicly
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liked by landonorris, yourbff and others
y/nusername uh oh i think i'm in love
tagged; landonorris
comments...
user1 awwwwwwww
user2 parents!!
yourbff i guess you're cute... i'm still better tho
⤷ y/nusername ssshhh he can't know the truth
landonorris my girl forever, i adore you
*liked by y/nusername*
landonorris you truly are the love of my life
⤷ y/nusername guess you're stuck with me then
⤷ landonorris wouldn't have it any other way baby
maxfewtrell this is sickeningly cute
⤷ y/nusername thank you??
user3 i want what they have
landonorris my home ❤️ (pls come home, i miss you)
⤷ y/nusername i'm on my way love
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