#(IT IS NOT OK THIS GUY NEEDS TO BE LOCKED UP)

[ktownshizzle]

Love & Lullabies | Teaser

Pairing: Min Yoongi x female Reader

Summary: What begins as a simple favor for your best friend Namjoon soon pulls you into the rhythms of Yoongi’s life—afternoons spent caring for his son, late nights filled with candid conversations, and a connection neither of you thought you needed. You’re fresh out of a long-term relationship with an ex who didn’t want a family with you, so did you really just stumble into a life you’ve always dreamed of? (Thank god Namjoon isn’t the only one who’s clumsy.)

Alternatively: It’s 2025 and BTS is prepping for their comeback. All members seem to have gained muscle weight from their time at camp. But Min Yoongi has gained a different kind of weight—an 8-pound baby and a fuck-load of responsibility.

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut (tbd), idol!au, Acquaintances to Lovers, Reader is Namjoon’s bestie

Warnings: Yoongi is a DILF (!!!), Mild cursing

Word count: 800-ish for this teaser

Posting date: November 7, 2024

Notes: This is for my friends and moots in the US. Please stay strong. One day at a time, my loves. Future’s gonna be okay 💕 This story is inspired by @yoongznme 's ask/prompt. Thank you for requesting!

Taglist is OPEN.  Leave a comment here to be notified when the story drops.

Masterlist

Namjoon leans back in his seat, sporting an all-too-familiar, slightly conspiratorial glint in his eyes. Hmm. You know that look. 

It's the same one he had when he "casually" set you up to tutor one of his trainee friends in English—the one you let slip was kinda cute. Or when he signed you up to perform with one of his rapper friends in that underground club in Hongdae. Sure, you knew every word of the chorus to eminem’s Stan, but you were not a fucking singer. 

You still did it, though. Both times. 

Namjoon’s especially notorious for volunteering you to do things he insists are "right up your alley." There’s a fire in his eyes when he starts talking about one of his ideas, and before you know it, you're swept up in his vision, already picturing yourself right there beside him, doing something you’d never consider on your own.

Namjoon has been your best friend since forever and for reasons you can’t explain, saying no to him has always been impossible.

Right. It’s definitely that. It’s definitely not because in those two prior instances mentioned, both friends of his are actually the same guy. The one you had an almost crippling crush on over a decade ago. (You’re sooo over it, though. Trust.)

When Namjoon finally leaned in, you were already bracing yourself.

“So, you know Yoongi, right?”

You blink, pause, and slowly shake your head. It has taken years, but today is the day you tell him, “No.”

“The fuck? What do you mean no?” He replies, already looking hella amused. “I haven’t even said anything.”

Your face feels like a furnace, but you grit and steady your voice. “Whatever it is, the answer is no.”

He lets out a hum, shifting in his seat, and you get the sense he’s working up to something. 

You sip your coffee, keeping your eyes on him. He gives you an exaggerated shrug, dimples deepening as he lets his shoulder sag. 

God you’re literally already about to break. 

“Fuck. Joon. Spit it out.”

He nods triumphantly, “Ok, there’s something I thought I’d run by you first, before he hears about it.”

The words hang in the air, and you raise an eyebrow. “What are you getting me into?”

Namjoon chuckles softly as he folds his hands on the table. “So… Yoongi has a son. A baby, actually.” He pauses, watching for your reaction. 

What? Someone has fuckboi Min Yoongi all locked down?! Huh. You never saw that coming.

You let that sink in, surprise filling the quiet space between you. “I… didn’t know he had a kid.”

“Not many people do,” Namjoon admits. “Only those close to him know. Yoongi’s an incredible dad, but his caretaker recently left, and now he’s scrambling to balance his schedule and take care of his son.”

“And his wife?”

Namjoon sighs, gives you a look that means he’s about to say something confidential. “There’s no wife.”

“Baby mama?”

“Out of the picture.”

You let out a small breath, absorbing everything you just heard. You already had an idea of where this is leading up to, but you want it said explicitly. “So what exactly are you telling me here?”

Namjoon nods, eyes hopeful. “Look, I know this is a big ask. I’m putting this out there because you’re one of the best with kids I know. And Yoongi—well, he’s pretty wary about letting new people get close to his son.”

You take another sip of your latte as he prattles on.

“While you’re still getting your bearings back, maybe you could take over the caretaker job, even part time?”

Namjoon scratches the back of his neck, grinning sheepishly as he says your name. “I just thought you might consider it. You’d be doing us both a favor. Yoongi really needs help, and I’d trust you more than anyone with this.”

You sit back, letting Namjoon’s words settle. He knows exactly what he’s asking—knows exactly how hard it is for you to refuse when he gives you that puppy dog look, and then he’s throwing Yoongi into the mix. Honestly, you hate how you're apparently still soft for him even after all these years.

Namjoon also knows your current situation. Does he not realize it’s a bit unfair to ask this of you right now? Not when you're still picking up the pieces after your breakup with your long-term boyfriend. Not when you need time to heal. Not when you literally uprooted your life and just moved back to Seoul a month ago.

But somehow, you can’t shake the curiosity. What would it even be like to see Yoongi as a dad? To get a glimpse of this whole other life he’s got now?

It’s probably a terrible idea. 

Yeah, no. You don’t need this right now. Money isn’t tight. And you need to focus on… 

You take a slow breath, mentally tracing the edges of this mess. There are a hundred reasons to say no, and only one reason you’d even consider saying yes. And because it’s for Yoongi… damn, maybe just one reason's enough.

Notes: So, what do we think? I'm genuinely excited to share my new baby with you guys! Let's go, let's go!

Taglist is OPEN. Leave a comment if you want to be notified when the story drops.

Help name the baby here

[we-rice-boi]

Mc with crow-like behaviors (WIP)

Ok, so I have a random thought that's been making waves through my subconscious for a while now. What if we/ MC were like a crow, collecting shiny objects or things that would remind us of the guys?

Like I'm purely self-projecting here because I like to scavenge for shiny things, hoard them, and give the best pieces to ppl I care about. It's like dragon/ crow behavior, where I collect, hoard, and only show my stuff to the most trusted ppl.

But frl though how do you guys think the LAD men would react and what do you think MC would give to them 🤔.

I can imagine for Sylus you'd collect random gun parts you'd see or random bolts/ metals that could be melted down and made into little accessories for weaponry. Or just straight-up broken guns that you see lying around the N109 zone that he can fix. Honestly, I doubt he'd use them though. Like he'd just display it in his room so it doesn't break, it's in one of those shiny air-locked cases or something 🤣.

As for how he'd react, I feel he'd be amused. Like I'm sure he's used to Maphiesto doing it but with you it's new. The first time he sees you actively collect shiny things is when you two are coming back from an auction or high society party and you just decided to have a walk through the streets in Linkon. Just suddenly you spot a shiny stray bolt on the floor and dash to do your scheduled inspection and collect. I can see him being so surprised at first but then he sees what you're collecting and is so tickled by the thought. He'd make a joke like "Maybe I should've nicknamed you my pretty bird/ crow instead of kitten. Not to mention the none stop teasing about you and Maphiesto being alike in more ways than one.

For Zayne I feel you'd collect pretty flyers that have a Cafe advertising cute pastries or pastry decorations. You'd also collect random materials that you could twist into cat figurines, like wires, cloth, and gems.

For Rafayel it'd be flower petals, berries, and clay. Ya know stuff that could be made into paint and since I'm an artist myself I'd like to think that MC knows how to make the paints to show off to him. Oh and make-up pallets!! Like I see a lot of random makeup pallets around when I'm walking that I just take up to make into paint. Another would be broken art utensils that you could make sculptures out of (kinda like Zayne's with the cat figurines). Like I could do different fish or fictional sea creatures (or his lumarian form ahem ahem).

For Xavier probably fabrics, like soft fabrics that you think he'd like the texture of along with soft yarn balls. Oh, that and pieces of different kinds of metals that you could melt to make little sword key chains!

Honestly, I wanna do this properly with all the guys so this is just a prompt for now and I only have a half-thought-out thing for Sylus cause he started this idea in my head but I'm for sure gonna expand on the others cause I have so many ideas. If you'd like to make suggestions on this that'd be awesome and I'd love to hear them. But frl though I need to get this idea out of my head.

Also p.s. Sorry for any typos, I'm dyslexic. So if anything looks weird lemme know.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

oh noooo or whatever

bonus aka The Real Motive Behind This:

SURPRISE double bonus. textless ver of the first pic under the cut

[beeduoo]

originnssssss who remembers origins i Loved origins

[nomaishuttle]

looking back on it i do think my childhood was engineered in a lab to make a really maladjusted person

[ocarinaofpride]

my ffxiv wol has an alluring charm not even emet selch can resist Hes that badass (actual dumbass but its ok) (he actually has major beef with him but when he got to see emet in the past its like getting in his pants was his main goal God please strike him down) i hope you guys like him. everyone loving him is his main schtick okay He is self aware about how much people wanna kiss him. fuck you sephi. get a job. you dont deserve to be the warrior of light

[came-out-of-the-coffin-desisted]

my haaaaaands are still fucked uuuuuup but when they’re unfucked up i’m gonna draw smth so sexy and delicious for my new skyrim oc i can see the comp in my mind’s eye it’d just make my hands fall off if i tried to draw it

[larryjohnsoncosplayonthursday]

last

for realsies

[frodolives]

1850s Tumblr Dashboard Simulator

👸🏻 girlbossladyjane Follow

It really makes me sick to see people giving money to penny weeklies when Franklin's expedition STILL has not been found 😭 There are good men out there trapped in unimaginable temperatures and literally all that's needed is a little more funding for another rescue mission yet all you guys seem to care about are your vulgar little stories...

🧔🏻‍♂️ queerqueg Follow

the franklin expedition is dead as hell

👸🏻 girlbossladyjane Follow

Disgraceful thing to say but I'd expect nothing more from a M*lville fan

10,558 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

Sorry for posting so much about Tom Gradgrind/James Harthouse from Hard Times lately. It turns out that I was getting arsenic poisoning from my wallpaper? Anyway I took a seaside stroll and I'm normal now. Check your walls y'all

#whyyy did i assume they were committing unlawful actions together like where did i even get that from lol #hard times isn't even that good by dickens standards tbh

659 notes

🎨 asherbrowndurand

Just painted this

2 notes

ss-arctic-girlie-deactivated18540927

RIP Napoleon... you may have been unable to conquer Alexander's Russia but you sure as hell conquered Alexander's bed

🖼️ preraphaelitebro Follow

HERITAGE POST

📝 shakespearesforehead Follow

How does this have less than 100k notes you could literally not avoid this post back in the 20s lol

82,170 notes

🌄 loyalromantic Follow

poets just aren't dying young in mysterious water-related incidents like they used to :/

#as useless and degenerative as i find 'the living poets' and i'm glad we're finally moving on from them #i have to agree with op in this respect

6,884 notes

🎀 thefopdiaries Follow

I finally got a daguerreotype of myself ^_^ Porcelain urn for scaling

📜 bartlebi-thescrivener

i think i hauve consumption

112 notes

🐋 whaler4life

They found oil in the ground??? WTF. THIS IS LITERALLY THE WORSTTTT. FUCK MY LIFE FOR REAL THIS TIME

11 notes

🌿 naturesnaturalist Follow

I swear this website has 0 reading comprehension skills. Darwin NEVER claimed we "evolved" from apes like if one of you guys actually bothered to open his new book you'll see all his arguments are backed up by evidence. He actually makes a lot of sense

#sure there's nuance like i don't fully agree with all of it #but his general theory of natural selection seems pretty sound imo

56 notes

🤵🏻‍♂️ byronicherotournament Follow

🙈 butchbronte Follow

Of course these are the finalists lmao this website is so predictable. Anyway vote Heathcliff if you dont i'm going to assume you're a phrenologist

📖 sapphichelenburns Follow

It's not problematic to acknowledge the fact that Heathcliff was a brute like he literally killed dogs in case you forgot. #rochestersweep

🙈 butchbronte Follow

I love the implication here that Rochester never did anything cruel either. He literally locked his wife in the attic and lied to Jane about it 😭 like that was a pretty significant thing that happened

📖 sapphichelenburns Follow

And? God forbid women do anything

#why'd you have to pit two bad bitches against each other #anyway i'm not attracted to men but still went with rochester #bc in terms of living quarters thornfield hall > wuthering heights easily

8,027 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

Not the Russian tsar dying immediately after hartgrind became canon

#i know dickens hasn't technically confirmed it yet but like. SOMETHING was strongly implied ok #see: my previous post #dickensposting

522 notes

👨🏻‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏻 hartgrindisreal

LORD HELP ME. THE BODY LANGUAGE. THE WAY THEY'RE LOOKING AT EACH OTHER. AHHHHHH

#this installment!!! im-- #dickensposting #i can't fucking cope #dickens wants to KILL us he wants us DEAD....

2,309 notes

⭐️ newamerican

Hi guys sorry I haven't been posting lately it's been so difficult getting to California 💀 I'm finally here now though just need to find a pickaxe and soon I'll be digging! :-) wish me luck lol

#gold #gold rush #gold rush grind #california #adventure

0 notes

[caffeinatedvigilantewriter]

“And it’s an emergency?” Bruce asked her, brow furrowing in concern.

Dani tapped her foot. “Yes. I need to leave now.”

Bruce sighed. “I’ll contact our pilot, but I can’t guarantee that he be able to fly you to Illinois last minute.”

Dani smiled weakly, “Thanks Bruce.” She said as she walked out the door, running into Damian.

“Where are you going?” He demanded, Jerry the Turkey trailing behind him.

“There’s a family emergency I need to go to.” Dani explained, ruffling his hair, grinning when he squwaked and hit her hand away.

“When will you return?”

Dani hesitated, smiling fading, before she looked in Damian’s eye and forced a grin.

“That depends. But I’ll be back, you don’t need to worry.”

The study door opened, and Bruce poked his head out, phone in hand. “Dani, the plane will be ready right after dinner at the soonest. Where exactly are you going?”

“Amity Park, Illinois.”

~

Danielle’s ‘minor family emergency’ was a huge lie.

Damian saw her smile dim and her hands shake as she told him she would be back.

Danielle was in danger, he didn’t need Leauge training to be able to tell.

That dinner, Danielle’s suitcase and bag was right next to her chair as she ate, looking very distracted.

“Woah!” Duke yelped as he tripped over the bag, stabilizing himself on the wall. “What’s the bag for?”

“Sorry, I’m going to Illinois after dinner. Family emergency.” Dani sheepishly, kicked the bag under the table and out of the way, smiling apologetically at Duke.

“Family emergency? But I thought…” Duke trailed off awkwardly. He didn’t need to finish his sentence for everyone to know what he trying to say.

Dani shrugged but didn’t give them an answer.

Duke, Damian’s nd Bruce locked eyes with each other and shared a minuscule nod. They would be investigating in the cave that night.

“Ok, I’m heading out!” Dani said, giving each of them a hug that lasted longer than usual, as if she was leaving for the last time.

~

Dani’s flight was around 2 hours, and the only sound that was in The luxury cabin was the sound of her foot tapping.

She apologized to the pilot for the last minute notice, but he waved her off with a smile. Dani tipped him a couple hundred anyway.

The airfield was pretty far, so Dani called an ride to pick her up.

While she waited, she checked Danny’s message from this morning.

Prototype: Dani we need you in Amity

Protoype: The GIW are acting funny

“Tt. When is the car arriving?”

Dani froze, whipping her head around to see Damian holding a duffel bag and staring at her with a raised eyebrow.

“Uh-what? Damian?” Dani stammered in surprise, before she got angry. “Damian Thomas Wayne, why and how the hell are you here?”

Damian rolled his eyes. “I snuck on the plane and followed you, of course.”

Dani’s eye twitched and Damian got the feeling that this was a bad idea.

There was a long silence before Dani dragged him to the wall and whispered to him, “Damian, I have a reason for you guys not to come. A good reason. So you need to get a plane back to Gotham before it’s too late.”

Damian shook his head. “The pilots gone. And it is too late to catch another flight.”

Dani groaned, but was interrupted by her phone vibrating in her pocket.

She pulled it out and cursed as she read the message.

Dr.Jazz: Dani the GIW is closing down airports

Dr.Jazz: Nobody can get out or in

Dr.Jazz: are you here yet?

Fenton 2.0: I’m here

Fenton 2.0: with an unexpected guest

Her phone binged again, and she snapped her fingers to get Damian’s attention away from his phone- which he had pulled out when Jazz messaged her.

“Our ride is here.” She said curtly, picking up her bags and walking outside the terminal.

Dash Baxter was leaning against his car, searching the crowd. He caught sight of Dani and Damian, giving the younger girl a nod and the tween a raised eyebrow.

“You guys are lucky you got here when you did. The guys in white just closed everything down.” Dash said as he loaded their luggage into the back of his car.

Dani opened the backseat door and let Damian climb in before sitting down after him.

“What’s going on, Dash? Danny hasn’t been replying to my messages and Jazz is being extremely vague.”

Dash started the car and pulled into the freeway.

“Can’t go into detail. Too many cameras. We’re probably being followed.” Dash looked at Damon through the rewrite mirror. “Whos the tyke?”

“Damian. Damian Wayne.” Damian said as he wrinkled his nose.

“Dash Baxter. How’d you get caught up with the Waynes, Dani?”

“Bruce is fostering me. We just haven’t made an official announcement yet.”

Dash let out a whistle. “Nice. I won’t be able to drop you at the FentonWorks Lab, but Star and Paulina wanted to talk to you out anyway.”

Dash pulled into the park, and helped Dani and Damian with their bags before driving off.

There were GIW agents setting up cameras all around the park, in trees, lamp post, and they were even shoving warrants in the faces of home owners and setting cameras on their property.

Around 2/3 of the town was in the park, watching the GIW and talking in hushed tones. They all turned to stare at Dani and Damian as they walked through.

“Why are they stareing at you?” Damian asked, glaring at a boy his age, who squeaked and sprinted away.

“Because my family is rather well known.” Dani glanced at Damian. “And I have a Wayne with me.”

“Dani.”

They turned around to see two girls, one Latina dressed in pink and one blonde with large blue eyes.

“Paulina. Star. How’ve you been?” Dani smiled at them.

Star smiled at her, but it wasn’t real and plastic looking.

“I’m doing great. A little ghosty told me that the Fentons are waiting for you and Damian at the FentonWorks Lab.” Star eyed Damian with a curious eye and peered at Dani through her lashes.

“Don’t you think it’ll be to dangerous for the kid?” Paulina asked, ignoring the way Damian bristled at being called a kid.

Dani’s eye sharperned as she places a hand on Damian’s shoulder. “We have no choice. The GIW closed down the airport. He’ll have to learn how to survive.”

The girls faltered.

“W-what? But my dad is in New York! He..” Paulina stammered, and Star was at her side in a second, comforting her.

Dani and Damian walked away, Danis hand still on his shoulder.

They walked for some time in silence, until Dani stopped them and pointed at a GIW agent.

“Wanna help?” At Damian’s nod she smirked and continued. “Let’s put your training to good use. What do you think they’re doing?”

“You knew?” Damian asked her.

“You guys aren’t the only vigilantes in my family.”

Damian nodded and turned away from her, observing the agents in white.

“They’re setting up cameras. And cold sensors.”

Dani’s lips twisted into a small smile. “The GIW are officially called the Ghost Investigation Ward, but we call them the Guys in White.”

Damian raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t realize there were other ghosts.”

Dani’s eyes flashed green as she grinned.

“Well, Damian, you have a lot to learn. But yes, there are other ghosts.”

Damain nodeded and glanced back toward the Agents.

“Tt. If they investigate ghosts, why are they barricading the town?”

Dani’s face darkened and she placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Damian, there’s a lot I don’t know. But I can tell you this:”

She whispered her next few words.

“It’s about to go from bad to worse. Brace yourself.”

[egoistars]

PROJECT PARTER HCS (he wants you so bad) haikyuu

ft: aran, kita, atsumu, osamu, suna

ATSUMU:

HES TRYING!!! but is it successful? (no)

literally cannot shut up the entire time you two meet up but it's ok because he's funny

"hey you wanna see pictures of my teammates" "yeah sure" he pulls out a blurry .5 of suna's nostrils

offers you protein bars and osamus leftovers as snacks

compliments you on literally everything

you wrote two words? he starts cheering and clapping his hands like you're shakespeare presenting a new play

loves pretending to be your strict teacher whenever commenting on your work

makes up for his lack of preparation by making you laugh and flustered

"i think you can add a little more to this part" "you look so sexy calling me dumb"

if you two meet up at a cafe he ALWAYS!!! pays for you

started off as a mistake because he asked you for your order in front of the barista

but he thought for a moment and decided you're worth an extra $5 out of his wallet

always loses his pencils but has dozens of erasers?????

SWEARS by wooden pencils. he sees a mechanical pencil and jumps 5 feet into the air and starts screaming

last few days of the project he looks constipated every time you two are together

"do you need a diaper" "I WANT YOU"

you accept his confession because you unfortunately like him back and because you want a good grade

also because you don't want him pooping his pants

ARAN:

the sweetest!!

always asks how you're doing before pulling out his notes

digital note taker 100%

loves loves loves writing with erasable pen and only uses pencils for exams

is a "let's work on everything together" kinds guy

he says it's to make sure there aren't any disagreements in content and aesthetic (he just wants to talk to you)

if you guys aren't at your house, always offers to walk you back!!!

great academically but if you're making a poster or slideshow do NOT let him decorate it... pls watch out

"does this look good!" "i'm gonna hold your hand when i tell you this..." "omg you want to hold my hand 😍"

starts giggling to himself in his head whenever you guys accidentally touch

you catch him staring at you one day and you don't know what to say so you just stare back

he thinks its so romantic

you're just confused but go along with it

after presentations you think you guys are gonna go back to being friendly classmates but he finds you after class and asks you out :)

KITA:

ACADEMIC WEAPON TEACHERS FAV EVERYONE LOVES HIM

"do you want to read my notes?" he pulls out 5 notebooks with everything color coordinated, sticky tabs, perfect handwriting, and factually correct

he can sit and work for 5 hours straight and still somehow have perfect posture

first time you asked him for help on something you were about to piss yourself because you thought he would call you stupid and send you to hell

he gave you a small smile and started walking you through it with an unmatched level of patience

that was the moment you folded and had to physically restrain yourself from grabbing his cheeks and kissing his face

always offers you tea when you come over and brings out a small tray of snacks

"are you comfortable? do you need any help?"

is suuuuper meticulous but kind with his 739273 different corrections

he swears by the sandwich method of compliment-critique-compliment

"your analysis is amazing in this section but i think you can expand a little bit after because..."

you're the one who confessed first because you thought you would explode from cuteness aggression if you didn't

and also because you thought even if he did reject you, he'd do it in the most painless way

was super happy and bursted into a bright red face but shy smile!!

still told you to go back to the assignment though...

SUNA:

menace i hate him (no i don't)

literally doesn't understand anything that's going on and probably doesn't process what you're saying at first

realizes you're serious about this assignment and forces himself to lock in

asks a BUNCH of questions and jots them down on a google doc

loves to make random conversation when you two are working

actually insane gossiper

nosiest birch you know

allergic to minding his own business that mf has shit on everyone

are you slightly scared of what he has on you? yes. do you still want to hear everything he knows? yes

"i'm taking this info from page 175 of the textbook" "got it, but did you hear that kato is trying to get with his exs best friend??"

leaves notes on your project that are both unserious and encouraging

"omg u are literally einstein"

folds origami when bored

will give you paper cranes, frogs, foxes, and cats whenever you see each other

you discovered that there's small doodles in the posts it's he uses to make them

one day there's your name and his surrounded by hearts like the corny mf he is

confronted him and it and he was just like "oh you found that? well, do you want to go out with me?"

he was NOT SLICK with the way he skipped home and whistled to himself that day after you said yes

OSAMU:

HES TRYING HIS BEST!!! (pt. 2)

can only meet up after school because of volleyball so he offers to cook for you before starting to work

takes notes in class but doesn't understand half the stuff he jots down

writes actual bullshit but half a page in decides to abandon his pride and ask you for help

leans in a little too close whenever listening to what you're saying

tries to make sure your knees are touching and that it's all an accident when your fingers brush (he prepared each scenario in his head before sleeping the night before)

down bad LOSER

spends his time doing his portion of the project while sneaking glances at you

doesn't know how to decorate presentations for the life of him so he is on doodle duty

gives surprisingly good suggestions and takes your corrections to heart

one of the best project partners because of how willing he is to learn and contribute!!! (also because he wants to impress you)

talks shit about his brother to you

atsumu has walked in while osamu was telling you an embarrassing story

they start fighting

osamu gets super embarrassed when you laugh at him

then gets overly confident when you tell him you were rooting for him

will not stop dumb smiling whenever he sees you after that

asks you out after the project is turned in with his hands in his pockets with how they're shaking so much

[squiddy-god]

HSR men and manhandling

Manhandling HCS pt one?

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Ok so this is actually just because i have lust in my heart lmao- this came to me in a dream so buckle up, i am definitely willing to do more characters because i have thoughts- reminder that i often write smut from an afab perspective but that its gn! Because i am a trans man so ftm reader you guys are my faves <3 this is for everyone tho. These are lowkey long-

♥︎REQUEST ARE OPEN ♥︎

ARGENTI, BOOTHILL, DR RATIO, JING YUAN 

Cw: smut, suggestive content to just straight smut, man handling,dom!/top characters. Established relationship, biting, no pronouns (afab anatomy), implied chubby/bigger reader, PDA, slight exhibitionism, mentions of bath sex,mentions of oral (m & f receiving)  Description of touching hair (no texture described), aftercare is given even if not fully described  i have so many thoughts 

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Argenti 

Ok hear me out-

He doesn't do it on purpose, argenti to his core is a gentle lover

But he's a knight of beauty and quite strong, throwing around a huge spear as if it was nothing, effortlessly defeating monsters in his pursuit of beauty

And until you, he traveled alone, you are truly a blessing from Idrila and who is he to refuse such a blessing. 

Argenti naturally just waxes poetry to everyone and everything, it ramps up with you, it's more tender and loving. The other thing is that he's more physical, kissing a lock of your hair, the back of your hands, embracing you, dancing with you etc. this is where the problems is (its not a problem i NEED this man)

Argenti doesn't often show physical affection with anyone besides his beloved (you) so he sometimes forgets his strength, and while he could NEVER dream of handling you in any way except with tender care and the touch of a gentleman 

He ends up manhandling you. 

Argenti also loves you with everything, sex is special, its connection, it is devotion 

And he is DEVOTED 

Gently grasping your hand and waist to pull you into his embrace simply so he can admire you? The force is enough to (literally) almost sweep you off your feet

Drawing your body close to his, the music drowning out the noise you make as he moves you to dance with him. 

It's like you weigh nothing to him, he can simply move you however he wants.

Often sweeps you off your feet because he forgets that most can't just sweep you into one arm while the other cradles your face. 

What's hot about it is that he is literally manhandling you with such a tender expression you almost forget the way his hands grip your hips as if argenti is trying to commit the feeling of your plush body to his memory (he is) 

Argenti is a giver in the bedroom, but the manhandling continues 

Asks before he does literally anything- can he move your hips up? Can he kiss you? What do you need from him? 

But once he has your consent on permission THIS MAN FOLD YOU IN HALF

If he's giving you head/eating you out? Consider your legs PINNED DOWN, once you tell him that he can finally have a taste he is dragging you across the soft sheets of his bed and DIVORCING your legs. 

His favorite position for eating you out is him sitting on the bed with your legs slung over his shoulders and a bruising grip on your hips and thighs holding you up like its nothing, he likes it because it makes it so easy for you to look up at him while he maintains the most loving eye contact you have ever received. 

Back to Argenti folding you in half- he will be balls deep in you panting and huffing while he's practically slamming into you, his hands grabbing at any part of you he can reach, tummy, thighs, love handles- anything. He let out a breathy moan asking to move you “just a bit” and when you nod your head with a whine he's dragging you closer and throwing one leg over shoulder before leaning down to ask for a kiss, practically pressing your knee to your shoulder. 

Always is so shocked at how sore you are despite the fact he was bending and folding you like origami- he truly doesn't realize just how much he throws you around.  

Boothill

It wasn't intentional…at first

Once he realizes just how much he man handles you (and how hot and bothered it gets you) it is 100% intentional 

He is a menace and is unashamed of anything

His metal body is a lot stronger than a human body is so there is a lot more that he can do

Boothill is unashamed, he dosn’t give a fuge who sees, in fact- a more possessive side of him is very happy to see the the stares he garners with his hands around your waist practically dragging you along with his long strides

Boothill’s two favorite activities include pulling you towards him by the waist, and holding you there when you try to squirm away as he bites and nibbles your cheeks

Traveling with boothill is dangerous so shootouts with ipc and any other bounties he's hunting aren't uncommon, neither are hasty escapes where he hoists you up and slings you over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes

Honestly him throwing you over his shoulder isn't uncommon even if it's not for a hasty escape

Oh the cyborg sees you talking to someone he thinks is getting a little too friendly? He doesn't care how much you protest he is dragging you away 

Back to the shootouts, if he sees your gonna get punched, shot or otherwise harmed he is pulling and pushing you all over the place like a ragdoll after all his reflexes are a lot quicker than yours so 

Another one who likes to dance (did you see those moves) and he’s not even sorry as he pulls you against him to dance, laughing as he moves you. 

The more boothill knows you like being manhandled the more he does it- sometimes it's really just to tease you

Pinning you down in your cair before letting you get up, all while hes laughing at how flustered you get

Boothill’s manhandling isn't so much about folding you in half but more so keeping you there- 

He loves to throw you onto the bed- after he's hauled you off from a far to friendly chap, or a gunfight he will throw you onto the bed as you bounce slightly 

This mostly happens once you are both safe from a bounty or gunfight- artificial adrenaline pumping through the tubes he calls veins and it has him itching to have you 

Pinning your hands above your head and kissing you with a little too much teeth

Dirty lip biter

He bites his lips when he's pissed off (often) and when he kisses you (also often) so you should both invest in chapstick because your lips are bit to high hell by the time boothill pulls away

Big big fan of fucking you against a wall- might as well put this metal bod to work in his opinion, and what a better way to use it than to grab fistfulls of thigh and ass while your legs rest on his cold hips? 

Its perfect because he only needs one arm to hold you up, the other free to roam and pinch where he wants 

Chronic ass slapper

If he sees an opportunity to smack your ass he. Is. taking. It. 

You alway know because you hear the clink of his boots and the accessories against him and the loud wolf whistle he lets out.

Dr.ratio 

The good doctor is somewhat oblivious 

He acknowledges that sometimes he dose move you in a way that would be considered manhandling but is mostly unaware of the effect it has on you

The difference with ratio is that so much of  his manhandling is in a domestic way, 

Oh he needs a mug for his tea and you are doing something in front of the counter where the cabinet is? Prepare for a stong hand on you waist and he moves you to the side like you are little to no obstacle

Oh you are getting swept up in the crowd? Fear not for veritas places a hand on the small of your back to guide you with him as he practically cuts through the crowds. Really its more of pushing you but really whos complaining?

Personally i am a fan of men who are closet/secret FREAKS and veritas ratio is a freak

I think hes rather possessive in the sense that while he is wholly confident and secure in himself and you- afterall why would you leave him for some idiot 

It is a small irrational feeling that plays into the fact he is quick to annoyance and anger 

The temper of the dr is well know tho very rarely directed at you 

It is moment like this that hes more hands, his hand a death grip on your shoulder or the plush softness of your waist as his words cut harshly to the person getting to friendly 

You are HIS idiot (affectionate) 

One of the best (read: hottest) things to watch him do is sculpt. I hc that beyond stone and marble ratio also dables in clay and pottery (im bias)

Watching this man wedge clay is an ✨experience ✨, his thick toned arms that flex with earth movement, the way his back is pulled taught and his palms press the clay against the surface.

Hes practically leaning over it and grunting (wedging clay is an arm workout) . I mean how could you not watch that slack jawed wondering when it's your turn? (i'm gonna write suggestive ration on the wheel) 

IN THe BATH?? Not enough ratio bath sex in my life tbh but this man is aughhhhhh

Ratio likes his baths, warm relaxing water and a good book? Perfect 100 points. Having you with your back pressed against his chest? Extra credit 

Dr ratios love languages are info dumping and acts of service change my mind. He likes to be useful, a deep seeded need to help people, and especially you. He likes to wash you in the bath, from washing your hair to scrubbing you clean he wants to help so just relax into putty in his arms 

He doesn't hesitate to turn and maneuver you however he needs to scrub and clean you and he manhandles you because you're a bit slippery. His grip is more firm (when is it not?) 

One thing he does slightly unintentionally is turning your face/head to face him/look him in the eyes. His hands grab your jaw or squish your cheeks as he turns you to look at him making sure you are paying 100% attention 

Same with kisses, a firm hand at the nape of the neck pressing you further into him. 

Guess what? Its your turn because this touch starved man is grabby it isnt a want he needs to be grabign at anything he can rach his hands practically kneading your soft flesh while you get flipped and folded. 

This man is a dr…he knows all the angles that make you writhe and he intends to exploit them even if he has to pull out and fold you in half before pushing himself back in 

Big fan of pressing down while kneading your stomach right where he knows his cock is so deep inside you 

Jing yuan 

The lazy general 100% dose it on purpose, hiding behind that warm grin despite his actions 

Most of the time he is very gentle, but there are times when his work becomes rather taxing and he needs a small break 

The small break being waiting for you to walk close enough only for his strong arms to wrap around you and pull you down into his lap where you will NOT be leaving 

This is his main form of man handling, pulling you into his lap and holding you in his iron grip

Big fan of naps and he will often pull you into the optimal sleeping/cuddle position whenever he gets the chance to

Oh your arm is falling asleep? Don't worry he just picks you up and maneuvers you to basically lay on top of him

He lights the weight of your body, his very own weighted and heated blanket 

He plays the fool but there is a distinct twinkle in his golden eyes when he sees the way you grow flustered whining about how your in his office and-

But it doesn't matter to him because he needs this- so just stay in his lap a little longer 

He's even worse in bed- his work keeps him busy so he feel that he needs to compensate by absolutely rocking your world

Really it depends on the time of day- ironically you get manhandled more in the mornings when he wakes up hard and absolutely aching for you

In the mornings when you are both still sleepy he drags you closer to him, kissing up your shoulder and neck until he has you begging for him in that morning voice he finds so irresistible, 

Wastes no time spooning you, letting out a groan as he slides inside you and rocks you against him- his hands have a firm bruising grip on your hips as he rocks you against him with force 

One hand remains on your hip to keep up the punishing pace while the other holds your jaw so you twist to kiss him- and he cant get enough, he slams you back against him rougher and rougher until you are both satisfied and he is all but forced out of your shared bed. 

The second is at night when he has you on top of him, riding him while his hands grab your ass and thighs, throwing your weight around while he looks up at you with the same lazy grin he always has

As if he isn't bouncing you along his length just waiting for you to stutter from the burn in your legs- all an excuse to pick you up and pin you back against the bed under him- 

All an excuse to be able to leave open mouth kisses against your skin while he has his fill of your pillowy softness 

In summary he knows exactly what he's doing and he knows exactly how riled up you get when he uses just a little of his strength on you. 

Don't let the drowsy grin on his face fool you. Menace through and though 

[sharlsworld]

⋆⭒˚.⋆ parents these days - 𝐋𝐍𝟒 𖤓

（ 𝗉𝖺𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 ）𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗑 𝗅𝖾𝖼𝗅𝖾𝗋𝖼 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋

（ 𝗌𝗎𝗆𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗒 ）𝗅𝖺𝗇𝖽𝗈 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗂𝗌 𝗂𝗌𝗇𝗍 𝖺 𝗋𝖾𝗀𝗎𝗅𝖺𝗋 𝖽𝖺𝖽 𝗁𝖾𝗌 𝖺 𝖼𝗈𝗈𝗅 𝖽𝖺𝖽，𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝖿𝖾 𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗆𝗈𝗆 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗒𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗐𝖺𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝖻𝖾

𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾 ✫ 𝗂’𝗆 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝖺 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍 𝗋𝗇 𝗀𝗎𝗒𝗌 𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗒 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗆𝖾 😭

🝮

landonorris

liked by pierregasly and 1,982,446 others

landonorris we miss our mommy

georgerussell63 Who left you in charge of a 1 month old and a 2 year old?

⤷ landonorris i’m their dad??

⤷ georgerussell63 And??

yn i miss my boys too 🥹🥹 & don’t forget to pick up mathéo’s ointment

♥︎ by author

⤷ all4lando she’s such a mom i love it 😭

francisca.cgomes our??

⤷ landonorris she was my mommy first

⤷ francisca.cgomes you’re disgusting

joris__trouche Justice for Malachi 💔 0.5’s are not his friend 😞

⤷ yn are you implying my son doesn’t look cute joris?? 🤨

⤷ joris__trouche Nonono you and lando make the most beautiful babies in the world

leclerc_pascale My boys 🥰 We need to gave a family dinner soon

⤷ landonorris YES PLEASE i’m in need of your pasta right now

⤷ leclerc_pascale Come over and bring the boys, I just made some

⤷ landonorris already in the car

arthur_leclerc i bet they miss uncle art so much 🥰 i’m coming over right now dw

⤷ landonorris i’m locking the door

⤷ arthur_leclerc girl…i have a spare key

⤷ yn since when?

⤷ arthur_leclerc me & charles snuck in when you guys were sleeping 🥰

⤷ charles_leclerc Hey don’t expose me

🝮

yn

liked by oscarpiastri and 3,331,747 others

yn back with my boys 🤍

landonorris first

leclerc_pascale Have fun on your date night!! Love you two 🤍

⤷ lorenzotl Not to much fun though, I don’t need another nephew right now

⤷ arthur_leclerc seriously do you guys ever just lay in bed?

⤷ landonorris i am incapable of that you’re lucky we’re not on baby number 6

⤷ arthur_leclerc oh!

maxverstappen1 Pussy whipped

⤷ landonorris damn right

charles_leclerc Finally he wouldn’t stop calling me to tell me he misses you

alexandrasaintmleux The sweetest baby boys 🥹 I love them so much

⤷ landonorris woah now i’m a devoted and loyal husband to y/n alexandra

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 😐 blocked

carlossainz55 I miss my nephews I will be over soon to kidnap them ❤️

⤷ yn sounds great los 🫰🏽

⤷ sharls_leclercussy “los” i’m crying 🥹

danielricciardo Gurl boss ✊🏽

🝮

landonorris

liked by georgerussell63 and 1,128,632 others

landonorris moms such a party pooper 💔 she wouldn’t let me paint the boys yellow and dress them up as minions

charles_leclerc Do you all just lay in bed all day? And do nothing?

⤷ landonorris would you like it to be just me and y/n in bed alone doing something?

⤷ charles_leclerc I will come sleep in between you two lando norris

mlnmarta Chiara misses Mathéo & Malachi!! We need to visit soon 🤍

⤷ yn yess come over!!

georgerussell63 We must make this happen I can’t get the image out of my head

francisca.cgomes hot mama 😍😍🥵

⤷ landonorris real she can spank me anytime she wants

⤷ mclaren Please do not make us take over your social media again Lando.

yn i’ll put you in timeout

⤷ landonorris please do 🫦🫦

🝮

yn

liked by susie_wolff and 3,435,189 others

yn my babiesss 🤍 living my dream

carmenmmundt So happy for you baby 🥹 You’re so cute I miss you

⤷ yn carmen ilysm 😭💝

alexandrasaintmleux Seriously though, our shopping date when? 🤨🤨

⤷ yn tomorrow 😫

francisca.cgomes MILF MILF MILF

⤷ carmenmmundt MILF MILF MILF

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux MILF MILF MILF

⤷ lilymhe MILF MILF MILF

⤷ lilyzneimer MILF MILF MILF

⤷ landonorris MILF MILF MILF 🤤🥵🍆🍑

landonorris let me put another baby in you please please please mommy 😈😈😫🍆

⤷ yn lando…we’ve talked about what’s appropriate to comment and what’s not

⤷ mclaren Come on bro 😔

⤷ francisca.cgomes take away his social media rights‼️‼️‼️

leclerc_pascale My beautiful girl and her beautiful family🥰

lilymhe ok period aesthetic queen

haileybeiber literally my pintrest board

carla.brocker i miss you sweet girl 💕

⤷ yn i miss you we need to have a sleepover soon 🥹

⤷ flowers444yn y/n still having sleepovers as a wife and mom of 2 kids is so on brand

landoslove this post was for the girls

⤷ landonorris don’t forget lando 😍😇🥰

🝮

landonorris

liked by mclaren and 3,892,715 others

landonorris Enjoying Barcelona with my family ❤️

arthur_leclerc yk it’s not lando because he’s using auto caps

thisistotallynotlando they didn’t take away my burner account 🤣🫵🏽 i can’t be stopped

♥︎ 1,729,143

alex_albon free lando till it’s backwards ✊🏽

pierregasly YOU WILL BE AVENGED LANDO

georgerussell63 This definitely sounds like lando 👍

oscarpiastri Very convincing

slutmeoutlewis they actually took over his account again 😭😭

hoeforsainzzz justice for lando

thisistotallynotlando not gonna be a little family for long 😈

lordperceval petition for lando to get his account back ✊🏽

♥︎ by alex_albon and 1,113,648 others

🝮

yn

liked by patrickdempsy and 3,790,631 others

yn do you wanna play mermaids with us?

alexandrasaintmleux My love 🫦🫦

beloved.hamilton where are mathéo & malachi at??

⤷ yn with their dad 😊

carmenmmundt My mermaid tail is purple

oscarpiastri Come back down lando can’t talk to you cause they took his phone and he��s tweaking

⤷ sharls.eclair THEY TOOK HIS PHONE 😭

francisca.cgomes damn ma

leclerc_pascale Beautiful girls ❤️

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 🥰🥰❤️

⤷ yn thank you maman 🤍

charles_leclerc My girls ♥️♥️

⤷ yn ♥️

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux 💋♥️

mclaren i miss you baby - lando

⤷ maxverstappen1 LMFAO GIRL 💀

⤷ sharls_lerklerk max?? 😭

landosfootfungus where’s lando’s comment?? 😪

⤷ yn he’s in social media jail rn

lilymhe SO GORGEOUS UGH 😫

georgerussell63 The last slide is actually lando and y/n is you guys didn’t know

⤷ alexandrasaintmleux Actually 🤓☝🏽

🝮

landonorris

liked by tomholland2013 and 5,167,765 others

landonorris 3 weeks of good behavior and i got my account back. and what did i do in those 3 weeks of good behavior? i got my wife pregnant again 😊

arthur_leclerc sick bastard (i’m so excited)

lorenzotl I jinxed it 😪

yn baby girl norris?? 😇

leclerc_pascale Can’t wait to meet my new grand baby 🥰

alexandrasaintmleux yayaya so happy rn

carmenmmundt You two make the cutest babies it’s not even funny 🥹🥹

francisca.cgomes YESYESYES SO EXCITED

joris__trouche Crazyy congrats you two 💞

maxfewtrell Leave that poor girl alone

carlossainz55 UNCLE CHILI 🌶️❤️

flavy.barla Awhh so happy for you two 💗

ciscanorris Another one! 🩵🩷

charles_leclerc WHY DO YOU DO THIS?? MY BABY SISTER?? JUST LAY IN BED AND SLEEP ONCE IN A WHILE OH MY FUCK

⤷ lilymhe anways…CONGRATULATIONS 🥹

🝮

yn

liked by krisjenner and 7,762,831 others

yn matthew senna norris 🤍

comments on this post have been limited

landonorris i love you baby thank you giving me everything i’ve ever wanted and more ♥️

⤷ yn i love you more

⤷ landonorris i love you the most

alexandrasaintmleux baby matty 🥹🥹

leclerc_pascale Another boy, are we surprised? He’s the cutest boy in the world

georgerussell63 Coming over now

carmenmmundt Stopp how cute 💗

charles_leclerc Je t'aime ma petite étoile

⤷ sharlsworld “i love you my little star”

arthur_leclerc project senna

mclaren Future world champ 🧡

lorenzotl Maybe another one isn’t so bad

oscarpiastri Malachi is barley 2 months old??

⤷ landonorris i want a football team. it’s not my fault my wife is so sexy and i’m horny 25/8???

francisca.cgomes auntie kiki is coming baby!! 💓

lilymhe cutie boy 🥹🩵

maxverstappen1 Now get a vesectomy lando ❤️

♥︎ by landonorris & 2,223,841 others

[xyaehir]

“hold still!” —

SYP — self care night w ur sweet bf!

GEN. — fluff, crack

WARN. — gn!reader, male characters

REQ. — “Hi! Can I mayb request a skincare or spa day for any blue lock characters? If you don’t except this req, that’s totally fine! Thanks anyway!!!”

NOTES. — omg xyae!!! you finally posted!! no need for the applause guys 🙄🙄 also, i know some characters like reo, childe, kaeya etc would already know about skincare but we’re gna ignore that kay 😛

“stop moving!”

“i can’t help it, you’re smothering my face with this — this cleanser stuff!”

you sigh in mock annoyance, reaching your clean fingers to adjust the frog headband sitting on his hairline.

“do you do this everyday?” he tilts his head, squinting his eyes when you continue rubbing the product on his cheeks.

you hum in agreement, “its a way of taking care of your skin. you know, getting it to clear up.”

“my skin’s just fine. i just wash it with soap and not this — ‘hydrating cleanser’ stuff,” he rolls his eyes, using his fingers to air quote.

“how the hell do you have such nice skin when you wash it with hand soap?” you deadpan.

“genetics? i don’t really know,” he shrugs, wrapping his arms around your waist and leaning into your gentle touch.

you hum. “ok, go wash this off,” you trail off, turning your back and grabbing the masks and serums. “so we can start with these!” you beam.

his eyebrow twitches.

“what’s that for?” he cocks a brow, pointing at the small package on your lap. “you’ll see in a sec,” you smile, tearing it open.

walking over, you adjust his cute sanrio headband again before gently placing the face mask on his face. he shivers but before he could open his mouth to complain or make some sassy quip, you slap a lip mask on his face.

that was 30 minutes ago.

now you’re stuck on the floor with a sleepy man twice your size, quite literally squeezing the life out of you.

“babe, we were supposed to take the masks off like 10 minutes ago,” you sighed, patting his head. you hear him grumble, mumbling incoherently.

“i’ll do it then, stay still,” you smiled softly, reaching for your mask and then his masks. “tilt your head back a bit.” he complies and you reach for the serum bottles.

applying a small drop of serum on his forehead and cheeks, you take notice of how his eyebrows furrow slightly at the cold liquid.

“it’s a lil cold,” you chuckle, kissing his forehead before spreading the serum all over his face.

he hums sleepily, voice breaking softly as his eyes flutter close.

it’s quiet for a while, before..

SLAP!

“oww!” he yelps, eyes flying open as he sits up hastily. “why are you slapping me?” he manages to get out in between slaps. you hum, “it helps your skin to absorb the product better.”

he side eyes you.

you hear him groan. ignoring it, you continue with your skincare routine. “ugh!” he groans, way louder and more exaggerated. you feel your eyebrow twitch.

by the time you chose to stop ignoring his whining, he’d already kicked the blankets off the bed.

“what do you want? i already finished your skincare so just go to bed,” you sigh, reaching for your eye cream.

“yea but when are you gonna finish?” he asks softly. ‘i can’t sleep without you.’

you smile at him through the vanity mirror.

“baby, just one more thing alright?” the sleeping mask you reach for clatters on the table softly. “five more minutes. can you wait for me, hon?”

he hums tiredly, standing up and making his way behind you.

he kneels down, wrapping his arms gently but securely around your waist and rests his head on your back. “hurry up, w’na hold you so bad.”

your heart flutters and your movements stutter. you gulp, patting the product into your pink cheeks.

you both slept horribly that night since he fell asleep holding you and you couldn’t drag his heavy ass to bed.

— (bllk) NAGI, sae, REO, rin (genshin) KAEYA, CHILDE, xiao, venti, ITTO (star rail) sampo, JING YUAN (haikyuu) SUNA, tsuki, OIKAWA, KUROO (KNY) TANJIRO, giyu, sanemi (assclass) KARMA, ISOGAI () YOUR FAVES

@xyaehir 2024. This is my content, inspired or not. Do not translate, copy or plagiarise my works in any way. Reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated. <3

[secondwhisper]

I don't think this is a reasonable generalization. It's good to know that many conversion processes don't explicitly push students toward zionism, but I think it's more common than you may realize.

My conversion classes were co-taught by the local Hillel rabbi. (Anyone who's spent time in Jewish non- and anti-zionist movements for more than a couple years knows why this is a red flag.) Unfortunately, upon review of my notes from one particularly memorable class a few years ago, I didn't write down most of what she said. She did claim that BDS is inherently antisemitic. And she very explicitly told us that day that all real Jews are Zionists.

My sponsoring rabbi was aware that I am not (and also was not then) Zionist. He warned me before the beit din that I should not share my opinions on medinat yisroel unless explicitly asked. The Hillel rabbi, who was also on my beit din, did ask about how conversion "made me rethink my relationship to the state of israel". My sponsoring rabbi cut my response short - I think he was afraid the Hillel rabbi would not let me move forward to the mikveh if I said anything more than "it's important to know the historical context" and "it's important to be aware of what harms are perpetuated in the name of our supposed safety." (The third rabbi on my beit din did not talk much and I could not read his expressions.)

It was very much an effort of myself and one of the other students in these classes to politely push back against the compulsory Zionism created in that space primarily by the Hillel rabbi, and which was most aggressively enforced by one of the recently-welcomed gerim who just kept attending classes with us all.

---

Conversion does not have a standard curriculum. (Certainly not in liberal strains of Judaism, where I've spent my time and where I have the most friends, but I've never heard of a standard curriculum for Orthodox converts either.) I know (or at least fervently hope) that my experience (wrt pro-israel pressures) was not standard. But it absolutely did exist, and we did have a half dozen converts every year.

Hillel is one of the most prolific Jewish organizations in the US. Hillel is explicitly Zionist. It is hardly any wonder that those taught or sponsored by Hillel-affiliated rabbis would be pushed toward Zionist expressions of modern Jewish life.

Becoming Jewish means being welcomed into a people. There are plenty of Jews in the US (the context I know we're both speaking from) who simply would not welcome a convert who does not materially support the Israeli nation-state project. And if you're not welcomed by your beit din (or if you can't even find a rabbinic sponsor), then you're not welcomed officially; if you're not welcomed officially, your conversion is not finalized.

this is what happens when a reddit atheist automatically switches "jew" to "zionist", either using an algorithm or in their head. statements like this are an admission that "zionist" is being used to mean jewish.

[cutieln4]

Hot Laps | LN4 smau

lando norris x reader

summary: lando takes an actress on a hot lap. they immediately have chemistry.

fc: marsai martin, pinterest girls

a/n: GUYS IM SORRY!!!! college is kicking my ass and my friends are being fake so i'm sorry it's been a while my motivation has kinda been down :( also sorry it's short

yourusername

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yourusername new movie coming out soon!!! go watch it!!

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username1 I CAN'T WAIT OMGGGG

zendaya gorgeous as always

yourusername love u girl🫶

username2 YOU ARE GLOWING

username3 looked at myself and sighed

username4 i'm sat

username5 mother is mothering

username6 IM SO EXCITED

username7 face card never declines

yourusername added to their story

caption: GUESS WHOS GOING TO THE MIAMI GP!!!

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username1 OMG I HOPE I SEE YOU

username2 lock your doors

username3 ugh more celebrities that know nothing about f1 getting invited🙄

mclaren We're excited to have you!

f1

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f1 Lando Norris takes actress Y/n Y/l/n on a hot lap! Watch the full video here

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username1 holy crap

username2 no longer lando norizz😭

yourusername i was only a little bit scared!

landonorris just a bit?

username3 ok so now i need them to date

username4 how was lando able to focus while she looked at him like that?? i would fold immediately

username5 they were both so quick with their responses like the chemistry is insane

username6 idk who i'm jealous of more

username7 it felt like i was interrupting something

username8 she's so beautiful

username9 it was all too much for little lando norris

landonorris

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landonorris WOOOO P1!!!! Thanks for being my good luck charm, @.yourusername you'll have to come to races more often😉

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username1 HELLLOOOO????

danielricciardo they grow up so fast🥹

username2 what happened to shame?

yourusername of course! you'll just have to invite me :)

landonorris see you soon!

username3 OMG???

oscarpiastri Good job mate!

username4 IM SO HAPPY I CRIED

username5 lando norris is a grand prix winner🥳

username6 i'm still smiling

username7 congrats but the caption is crazy, rizz unmatched

yourusername

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yourusername thank you again mclaren for the invite, i think papaya is my color! and i even got to see some cute boy win!

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username1 "some cute boy" yeah okay

username2 i love the online flirting now kiss pls

landonorris you definitely belong in papaya🧡

yourusername oh yeah?

username3 LANDOS COMMENT BYE

username4 oh to be able to flirt with lando norris

username5 okay but why is no one talking about how STUNNING she is

landonorris i'm talking about it

username5 OMG

username6 when will it be my turn😣

username7 new wag PLEASE

username8 they NEED to date or else i will be upset

landonorris

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landonorris nice little break😊

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username1 WHAT

username2 wait...but y/n posted a few days ago and she was shooting a movie, so who is this???

username3 streets are saying this isn't y/n😔

yourusername looks fun, invite me next time!

username4 oh so it wasn't her

username5 i am a child of divorce

username6 WDYM THATS NOT Y/N??

username7 but they would literally be the IT couple

username8 fr, the chemistry was unmatched

username9 guys what if she's just saying that to throw us off?

username10 okay but she is literally filming for a movie she can't just go on vacation

yourusername just added to their story

Caption: who's this cutie?

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username1 YES MY PARENTS HAVE REUNITED

landonorris hmm i don't know, you should ask him🤔

username2 is his gf ok with you calling him cute??? homewrecker

username3 interesting...

username4 THE HEART IM CRYING

username5 yall are so perfect

yourusername

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yourusername fun weekend😚

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username1 WHITE BOY SPOTTED

username2 dare i say it...is that lando

username3 he already has a gf

username4 you know who's eyes look like that?🤭

username5 bruh there's billions of people in this world it could be anyone

username6 hold on im trying to spell gorjus

username7 interesting...

landonorris

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landonorris fuck a soft launch

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username1 OMG I KNEW IT

yourusername LANDO WHAT ABOUT OUR PLAN??

landonorris sorry🤷‍♂️

yourusername ur lucky i love you

username2 YALL TRICKED US WTF

username3 bout time omfg

maxfewtrell Congrats, mate!

username4 yayy!! sleeping on the highway tonight🤗

username5 power couple fr

username6 quick everyone act surprised!

yourusername

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yourusername yes it was me all along

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username1 MY PARENTS IM SO HAPPY

username2 dare i say the hottest couple ever??

landonorris my sweetheart🧡

username3 when will it be my turn😫

username4 HOLY SHIT IVE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS

username5 i want what they have

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