#[shes not even mad idk what her deal is]
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i swear my stepdad is so illogical AND stubborn it hurts
#okay so strap in coz this is a wild ride#tl;dr we have been without heat and warm water for years and i mean literal years#because he refuses to pay off some debt he built up with the company#because he feels unfairly treated (let's not get into this. it absolutely makes no sense) by the company#so instead of doing the logical step of growing some balls and admitting he made a mistake and paying off his shit#he's been looking for a new supplier all over but the deal IS#that he's been doing this with a couple of places before and people are hesitant to even make him any offers#and you'd think that learning about THAT at least now he'd be like. idk willing to just pay off his debt and be done with it#but you'd be WRONG#now he's looking to just have our entire heating system replaced for the teeny tiny price of 25000 bucks#mind you his debt isn't even a THIRD of that#and obviously he can't afford those 25000 bucks#so what's his next step now you might wonder?#well good thing you asked. his next step is going off on ME for not paying towards the new heating he wants#and now that that's not working for him guess what he did next?#that's right. he bought shit expensive 'space heaters' that are pretty much just small little boxes that you plug into an outlet#and he swears up and down that they're going to heat up our house (it's negative degrees outside)#(it's obviously not working)#and genuinely. all i can think of is how much money he shoved into trying to macgyver this house into a house with warm water and heating#and how he blew off ten thousands of bucks he got paid when he retired within the span of two weeks#when this debt could have been paid off ten times over by now#so now you might be thinking. okay tiago. why don't you move out#good question you see. my mom is disabled and reliant on someone who cares for her#something that he can't won't and shouldn't do because the last time he sorta kinda tried she almost died and we had to call an ambulance#she wouldn't eat a thing if i weren't there to cook. the house would fall into disrepair if i wouldn't do maintenance all around#i've set up (functioning) heat in some areas she occupies and i've gotten a boiler going so she at least has warm water#i'm paying off their bills to make sure he doesn't skip on paying any others. i'm buying groceries for them because again they wouldn't get#any for themselves#and finally. i've offered to pay off his debt so that we can finally live like normal fucking people do#and guess what. guess WHAT. he just got mad at me for not adding money to that 25000 bucks pool for that new fancy heating he wants
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Day 347 | id in alt
Kugisaki hasn't been around Gojo enough to gaf about him LMAO.
#dailykugisaki#jjk#kugisaki nobara#shoko ieri#okay rant time yall#i know some folkos might be mad that i make it seem like shoko is a wet fucking rag which she kinda is kinda isn't#shes clearly capable in her area although in a very she's using what she knows in a different way than shes used to#Shoko unfortunately was EXTREMELY dependent on Gojo's decisions and i hate gege for showing that#most of her actions included gojo in some degree which unfortunately made the decisions in which she needed to say things#she made those decisions based around what gojo would do#letting getos body go uncremated letting gojo killed geto himself ect ect#she didn't involve herself because gojo was gonna do it anyway and i think that mentally effected her bad#so turned herself into her work. somebody that deals with corpses becoming a single minded corpse herself. funny aint it#she has jokes but she isn't very used to having somebody focused on her for a decision she made#because Okkotsu didn't even fucking say a thing about her when his ass came back so i think it would be funny if Kugisaki kinda loathed her#like yes Shoko. your decisions effect others that arnt Gojo did you get jumpscared and then shoved back into reality? i hope you did#she dosent speak. words arnt really her thing where actions mostly are.#so shes trying to do things that help and thats funny because shes kinda ass at it#like helping burying somebody and like preparing for the worst after you fucked somebody over#shoko i see you#also girl why is the only version of self care you have ever done FLINGING YOUR FUCKING CIGARETTE AWAY#why is that your only version of self care and not getting over your damn alcoholism. weirdoooo#Kugisaki using herself as a frame of reference for bad shit. girl i see you LOL#hope that Shoko shit makes sense because she definitely does shit. she knows what she's doin#but before gojo died. well gojo was sort of like a fucked up version of a higher up for her idk#Shoko isn't a pushover. Kugisaki is just mad as hell.#shoko is an asshole that sucks at walking forward but she hurts while healing too so...girl what the fuck#she cant do much or anything with the kids except heal them in a way that dosent quite matter anymore
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i will never understand how some people can actively shit on something they know someone loves and finds joy in right in front of them. how can you hate something that makes someone else happy in this absolutely fucked world in front of them.
its the passive aggression for no reason i will never ever understand or do to others. if you have a passion, fucking LIVE it. if nothing else, passion gets us through every shitty day, and i will always support it.
have passion in spite of those who hate.
#its absolutely mind boggling to me#and genuinely makes me so fucjinf upset#i was sitting next to my sister who has been nicer to me than usual as she is talking to her online friend and im doing my nails silently b#its her polish and i didnt wanna take it out of her room. but i look up and shes ranking music genres which is all cool. but without#hesitation as the first one at the most bottom tier she put kpop. like i understand its not her cup of tea but i was like okay thats#something that actively makes me wanna keep living yaknow. and she knows that. so i was like#‘interesting placement for kpop’ and she didnt say anything so i said ‘im not sure youve listened to it enough to have such a violent#opinion on it’ and she immediately got angry saying shes ‘heard enough’ and then got mad at me for saying that saying why was i being ‘like#this what the fuck’ and my heart genuinely sunk into my ass but i couldnt leave even though i felt like crying bc i only did one hand and i#was drying at that moment plus i didn’t wanna make it a big deal. but this is not the first time she’s actively hated on my music without#prompt from me and it just makes me ????? like. music taste differs with everyone i understand this and i respect it. if something brings u#happiness then i would love to hear and listen even if i wouldn’t choose it myself. but being a bitch about it. idk#ultimately its the fact of being mean for no reason over someone else’s passion makes u a fucking asshole#:)))) im not crying bye#ashley rambles#to delete later#my mom and brother do it too btw. hating on it and making sure i hear it.#my mom was doing it the other day and my 7 year old nephew kept saying ‘pook i love it. i think its cool’ and it made me cry because kids#have the capacity for such unaltered kindness as the world has yet been cruel to them#idk man
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working with children really will make you examine your thought processes and emotional reactions like nothing else. I've found myself being so much more thoughtful in my daily life about how I respond to my emotions and environment, as well as the reasoning behind why others behave the way they do
#yesterday i got really frustrated and overwhelmed at one point because this one little girl keeps getting really upset when she cant help me#like shell ask to help and i wont have a task (or ive run out bc shes already helped) shes capable of so i tell her that#and thank her for being thoughtful and helpful. admittedly the first time this happened i was really frustrated w her already#bc she had made a huge mess doing something i told her not to do and then didnt want to clean it up and she only came back#and asked to help because her friend had been helping me. so i was like girl. you didnt even clean up the last mess#but i also had nothing for her to do. anyway she started screaming and hid under a table so then her friend did it sith her just. because.#idk kids will see their friend freaking out and they do it too. and i understand it but my god. i dont deal well with really loud noise#and she did it again yesterday. i let her help me and then i ran out of tasks and she started crying and saying i never let her help#and for some reason there were like 6 other kids in there all wanting to help so then several of them started freaking out#and i could not handle it. i literally told my coworker like im about to cry right now lmao#and later the little girl was like wanting to hug me and talk to me and acting like nothing happened and i found myself wanting to withdraw#like i was feeling like i wanted to avoid her and not speak to her or be cold but i also knew i didnt want to treat her that way#and i took a couple minutes by myself and thought about why i felt that way‚ what the effects of that would be‚ and how the kid felt#and i really just had to remind myself that she was feeling just as many emotions as i was but that shes only had 6 years#to learn how to manage them and deal with them in a productive way. she wasnt trying to upset me. she wasnt trying to make me mad#she was just dealing with her emotions in the only way she knew how. and im an adult and if she can get over it i really need to get over it#long ass tag story sorry
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I HATE MKAING PLANS IM THIS STUPID FUCKING HOUSE IT ALWAYD ENDS EITH ME WANTING TO CRY. FUCKING DANB IT
#im not crying (anymore cough-) but LIKE IM PISSED#I SPECIFICALLY TRY SO FUCKING HARD TO AVOID MAKING MY OWN SCHEDULES AND PLANS FOR WHAT WERE GONNA DO BECAUDE I KNOW MY MOMS GONNA FUCK IT UP#BUT LIKE FFS ONE TIME AND SHES ALR FUCKED IT UP. I WENT OVER IT TREE TIMES. I SAID I WAS GOING YO BE ANNOYING. I ASKED IF IT SOUNDED GOOD#SHES LIKE “yeah yeah sure” AND THEN TODAY. THE DAU BEFORE. SHES LIKE “oh also i uave to go somewhere else wich will inevitably fuck up#everyon4s social batteries and energy but im noy gonna acknowledge that bcs i dont understand it :). also ive known imma havr to do this for#the past two weeks“ LIKE FUCK YOU!?!?!?!#FUCKING HELL WHY THE FUCK SHOULD I EVEN HELP WITH GODDAMBED TREE SHIT IF UR GONNA BE LIKE THIS#“i dont understand why its such a big deal” I HATE THIS FUCKING HOUSE. AT LESST WHRN MY DAD MAKES PLANS HE FUCKING STICKS TO EM. THIS IS#BULLSHIY#im so fucking pissed yall i cant#im so mad at her for this bullshit#idk#kinda stupid yeah but like. FUCK THAT.#enea rambles <3#this is why i stopped making plans :/
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i just don’t understand. why say ur ready to talk if you aren’t?
can u believe this post is what got me to reach tag limit
#vaugepostimg on main about an irl don’t mind me#i just. am feeling sad bcus i have been trying to keep my distance and respect the space they said they needed. and then they reached out to#me for their book club and said we should chat and i got excited! i miss my friend of course i got excited#still let them take the lead. i want them to be comfortable. they said they’d lmk what day they were free#and then proceeded to ghost me for like. almost two weeks??#(it was 10 days but !!! still!!! almost 2 weeks from them suggesting i come to book club which would’ve inherently necessitated an irl talk#and then after all that yesterday said they actually weren’t ready which. hurted#tbf i knew something was up after like 2 days of them not replying so it’s not like i was fully caught off guard it just really hurt#and like i feel weird bcus our social circles are really overlapped and i spent a lot of time with them last winter and i had thought#that would happen again this winter. we would swim together a lot and i consistently went to their house dinners#bcus if i care about you i show up! and i’m understanding ! bcus i am patient and kind person and as a triple taurus i’m not tryna rush ever#especially when it comes to people’s emotions ??? especially if someone has told me i hurt them???? like ik im an autistic lesbian but#despite popular conceptions on that particular identity. im not fucking evil ????? if you ask for space i will give you space !!!!!#and like when it comes to emotions and conflict i’m blunt but i’m caring and it takes a lot for me to be disinfranchised by people#or relationships. so i’m not saying i don’t want to still be her friend#i’m just. noticing behaviors#they did tell me that they were very avoidant in conflict and i told them i’m very much not and like. now that i’m on the receiving end of i#idk what to do!! i’m not gonna chase her down like they’re grown!! and again!!! if you ask for space i’m going to respect that!!!#and like honestly. i’m happy she at least gave me the curtesy of saying they weren’t ready to talk even if it took her mad long to do it#so like. who tf knows when we’ll talk. if ever. probably when she wants the validation of our friendship if it even happens at all#bcus again. she reached out not to reconnect and clear the air but to check if i still wanted to come to her club she was starting#ik in earlier conversations she was worried no one would come but ig she found people. which like good for her tbh but to be honest i feel#discarded?? i’m feeling like i’m failing to not project too much so i gotta stop but idk man i’m just feeling weird about it all#and then i had the thought today of like. is this what i want in a friendship? someone who goes back and forth abt whether or not i’m worth#which again. kinda wasn’t expecting that bcus we spent so much time together last autumn/winter/spring like. many times per week!!!#so the idea of not being her friend all of a sudden?? feels fucjing weird to think about#but like? i don’t want to feel this way this is what i hate about west coast/white people conflict resolution!! there fucking isn’t any!!!#and i can’t deal with that! i can’t spend my life with people who aren’t going to engage with me as a person who cares about them#humans are fallible creatures and were only here on earth for so long so why are we wasting time here? what is the point of all this ???????#but then the guilt and shame say i deserve it all and at that point i just need to stop so. i’m gonna stop now lol
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thers this bitter passive aggressiveness between kids who secretly find a younger kid annoying and its really sad
#my little sister has very aggressive tendencies#she has no other playmate other than our younger cousin who she likes 2 act passive aggressive with#its sad seeing her make verbal jabs at our cousin and tries to play my callouts as 'favoritism' and 'acting weird'#ughh i try to defend my cousin when my sister starts making weird threats#like ugh idk its all so frustrating and complicated to deal with#theres so many factors to consider in her behavior and the problem is im not her psychiatrist#i recognize that shes a kid so i am patient with her and try to fill in with basic discipline#because alr our parents get irrationally angry with her so i forced myself to fix my same habit of yelling#guh idk#im just tired bro but i dont want her to grow up with that type of mindset#idk#my older sister isnt even doing anything cuz shes a pushover who bends when our younger sister just starts lashing out#i understand kids need to vent its healthy so i let her scream in her room#but what i dont allow is her hurting others just because shes mad#or smthn like that#idk im most of the time shes with me so i try to make good influences or smn#oh man this went on a long rant huh#is this considered a vent??#ventish#vent#just in case
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youtube
exene talking about the state of the world. the good stuff starts at eight minutes. or you can just read the transcript complete with the usual errors that accompany robot transcribed speech (the irony of which is not lost on me). maybe it's not about transhumanism and living forever (or maybe it is who knows), but there's definitely an agenda of surveillance and control at work which is designed to keep the powerful in power. cash rules everything around me and you will own nothing etc. the future is worse.
#google has helpfully flagged this as a 'conspiracy theory' which let me know it was definitely worth paying attention to#sometimes a conspiracy theory turns out to be flatearth-tier but anything those in control are putting effort into discrediting#concerns me and makes me look deeper. if they're going to the effort to control the discourse there's something there that#threatens them. anything google calls a conspiracy theory is worth a closer look. it often means someone has gotten too close to the truth.#she's brave to be talking about this shit they basically cancelled her and forced her to apologize for talking about how they want#to take our guns and the media is lying to you and stirring up fear so they can get away with passing gun control#like wtf leftists should be all about gun rights. a disarmed population is totally at the mercy of the state's authority#it's not very punk to surrender entirely to regimes in power and let the only people with guns be the police#like c'mon guys we need guns. and it's like drugs. they exist anyway. better they do so in broad daylight than in the shadows#they let adam curits talk about this stuff for some reason and no one calls him a conspiracy theorist idk why but there's a reason#i guess his stuff is not a threat to them bc it's dense and heady and seven hours long so the masses will never absorb it#ex punk rocker yelling about new world order in plain language monologues of digestible length is a much bigger threat#i swear there are secretly fifty people in control of everything and their entire aim is to make sure it stays that way no matter what#but it's really gross how obvious it's getting like the whole system just funnels money straight to the top and they don't even care#about hiding it anymore they're just doing it out in open and denying objective reality with confidence it's too much sometimes#i swear i can feel my grasp on reality deteriorating. it's as if there were a loud buzzing in the out of doors that was getting#louder every day and nobody ever said anything to acknowledge that it was real nobody talked about hearing the buzzing but it just#keeps getting louder and i'm finally like wtf is with this buzzing and everyone gets mad at me for shouting over their netflix show#that they weren't really enjoying in the first place. like no one is happy in the modern world. why can't we talk about why without#turning against each other. that's why doug saying 'maybe we're all the same' is such a big deal to me. anyone who is trying to unite us#is doing important work. that trump supporter is not the enemy. they are the victim just like you.
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not to be a pain-crazed wild animal. i KNOW i do this every time. but p*riods are so fucking crazy. like my cr*mps are so bad my body is trying to strangle itself but im awake and i need to be at work in 2 hrs and get thru an entire 9 hr workday as if im not in excruciating pain and im gonna bring my heating pad and my p*in r*lief cr*am if you catch my drift (💀) and i’ll need to use them DURING a busy day in which i will not see any other ppl who get periods in person and using them is gonna be a whole awkward thing. like omg. this is not fucking normal lol
#purrs#it is normal obviously. but it’s SO fucking frustrating like omfg the amount of time i lose every single month to being in pain like this#FOR NO REASON and like half the global population has to deal w that and it’s like it’s nothing. idk. despair and suffering and misery#delete later#menstruation tw#the thing that really gets me abt it is how my mom (ik i said i would stop complaining abt her on here but we have been fighting all month#LOL so im giving myself permission) gets so fucking pissed at me and my sister when we’re in too much pain to do chores bc she thinks we’re#being lazy / making excuses and then she compares us to o it brother like.. omg um YOU should know how painful this can be first of all and#second of all why would you even make that comparison when he doesn’t lose a third of his life to his body trying to tear itself apart! lol!#and yes i could work from home or calll out sick but consider: i am mentally illabout not being at work. which * is gonna be on my ass abt w#when they hear me say that bc i know im gonna make a whole awkward big deal abt my heating pad. UGHHHHH embarrassing lmaooooo#like why do people have REGULAR B*DILY F*NCTIONS!!!!! REGULAR!!!!!!! that REGULARLY put them in this amount of pain and we have to just deal#with that like it’s nothing and be discreet about and whatever. ew i sound like um… someone who cares too much abt stuff like this lol but I#im so mad abt it rn like oh my GOD can the pain just not be part of it can we just evolve to get rid of that or put structures in place in a#society for ppl to be more accepting / supporting / whatever of it. please please please please please#(also goes for more than just p*riods btw. like imagine if as a society we had things in place for ppl who are regularly in#chronic pain of any kind 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 what a world that would be 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍 wow i sure hope it happens in my lifetime 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍)
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my dad being clearly in a mood that only he knows the reason for and then my grandmother asking him if he’s mad at her and crying I’m going to BED
#mhm yes life is worth living#literally nothing even happened we fed the cats then took Ellie#out and then he was just mad and I knew he was cause he didn’t come inside#right away and I’m like?? we gotta let the cats out why is he outside.#then he comes in stomping around and huffing like ok. what#why she would even say anything to him when he’s mad like that idk she’s so annoying#I wouldn’t even be around him for 3 weeks cause I couldn’t handle it#and I told him how anxious it made me and he’s like well I didn’t realize it bothered you that much I’ll stop#well it took you like a weeek to be annoying again ok#fact that we will still have to deal with her after we move#from here is so not stressing me out and torturing me every hour or anything#I mean that’s what it is if she wasn’t here he wouldn’t be mad
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oh summertime we're really in it now
#one of my coworkers is being a complete bitch to me and i have nooo idea why#she literally got so shitty with me that she told me off and got up and left to work in a different room#and like i know i fucked up but it wasn't even that big a deal#and she's been sending weird passive aggressive emails for ages and like#idk i feel like this always happens#like people wake up one day and just decide they don't like me anymore and i never know why or what i did to fix it#anyway I'm probably emotional or being dramatic because i went to sleep at like 2am last night but#it's that whole lump in your throat thing#i know part of it is my ptsd brain seeing it as a threat when it isn't#but like. actually on the verge of tears#aaaaanyway#it's nice to hear 'you can run away with me any time you want' i guess#mine#it's specific to me too like she's nice to the other coworkers#idk i guess her being a woman in a position of power over me and then also being mad at me is like#hitting on all my mommy issues sore spots#maybe I'll do something nice for her to win her back over <- totally not fawn response#who watches the watchmen?
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#i think hearing abt workplace drama and wondering if id ever get in a fight w any of the others is possible is funny#bc the thing that got someone inntrouble once was that they called someone else out for just like. lazing around in the room#while thenfirst person was trying ti clean it and ig they took it wrong and made it a big deal to the supervisors#anyway today someone came into a room i was cleaning and i legit. not mad in the slightest even when shes using her phone#which is obv a no-no but all these mfs do it except me so it is what it is#but anyway not mad and shes not in my way at all really and she just looks so tired 😭#like she looks so worn im not even kidding like i am lacking sleep sure but she looks like shes lacking sleep AND worn from multiple partie#anyw i wouldnt start fights w anyone bc i just got worried. and shes so sweet idk everytime i walk into a room in a bit of a rush#idk if its bc im in a rush or if i look stressed or what but she immediately always asks me “rhelena are u ok?' !#... do i always look stressed or lost or smn i swear at least 2 ppl keep trying to comfort me and 1 just thinks im really cute 🤔#like cute enough to come up and hug and gush about.. ANYWAY. WHAT WAS I ON ABOUT..#yeah im not made for arguing or calling people out idk 🤔#like even on days when other hosts r like “this party mom is giving us attitude theyre a bitch” i talk to the mom and im like#i mean theyre a bit of a perfectionist but they sound likr theyre just trying to get their moneys worth idk-#LIKE ITS NOT. UNREASONABLE TO ME IDK?? things happen for a reason! or reasons! its fine idk its not that big a deal?!?!?!?#44597#... am i too easy or smn like?? 🤦♀️
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Arcane characters saying things they'll regret during an argument with you. | Vi, Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Sevika x Gn!Reader
(Part two)
Because if I can't be happy, then neither can you./j✨️
Content: Alcoholism, spoilers for season 2, heavy angst, toxic behavior, cursing, established romantic relationships, potential mentions of cheating, gaslighting/ manipulation, probably ooc idk, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns.
((Not proofread))
》VI
You hated the cycle she had trapped herself in. It was never-ending and beyond self-destructive. For a while, you tried to get her out of it by attempting to reason with her, show her the light, tell her that everything is going to be okay and to just stop with the senseless fighting. But then the heavy, out of control drinking began, and she became unrecognizable to you.
She barely spent time with you, and when she did, then it was due to an extreme hangover that you had to nurture her through before the next fight began. You were so sick of it. You couldn't take the state she was in anymore. You wanted your girlfriend back but didn't want to suffer anymore as a result of it. And so, you tried one last time to snap her out of it.
"Hey, uhm... can we talk?" You ask nervously whilst peering at her from the doorway into her room. The roaring of the crowd and indistinguishable words of the announcers buzzed over your heads, reminding you of the timelimit you had to do this right. Vi didn't turn to you and instead focused on smearing the black paint over her eyes, a dark gaze glance cast your way at your meek plea. "Make it quick. I got 10 minutes before I have to be out there again."
You took a deep breath and tried to ignore the coldness in her tone. It was so odd, so not like her. "Vi... I... I need you to stop this. I understand your pain. I really do, I... get it. But this isn't right. You're practically killing yourself here, and I can't take that anymore-" "-This topic again? I told you to fucking drop it already." She hissed with a shake of your head and something about that made you finally snap. "I care about you Vi! That's why I'm doing all of this shit for you. No one else would do as much as I did. Why can't you see that? What the hell happened to you-" Your voice was cut off by her hand slamming into a nearby wall, anger written all over her face that made you flinch away instinctively.
You had never been scared of her before and this just broke your heart further.
"Shut up! You haven't done shit for me, except for pissing me off and whining and crying about every little thing I do! How about you fuck off and leave me the hell alone instead!? The only person who ever did shit for me is Cait and look how that turned out!" Silence. Deafening silence. Except for Vi's heavy breathing. You were rendered speechless. All the years you've spent with her at her side even as children flashed through your mind, before it all stilled and went cold. Your gaze hardened, and you nodded slowly, turning away wordlessly to do as she asked. You understood now. You were always the second choice in the end.
Vi seemed to only notice that you've left once she heard her name being called from the ring above. And her heart sunk at the realisation that this time, you wouldn't be there to watch her win.
And so she didn't.
》CAITLYN
Zaun was becoming a sensitive and dangerous topic to bring up around her. Even the slightest mention of it made her face harden and earn you a dismissive hand waving all of your protests away. It also didn't help that she was pulling away from you and instead getting closer to a certain red-headed officer of hers. It was frustrating and so exhausting to deal with, on top of all the grief that hung over your heads constantly. It was driving you mad. Nothing you said got through to her.
It wasn't a secret that you disapproved of the war and the alliance with Ambessa. You could look right through her, see with a clear mind that she was up to no good. Whatever she had planned wouldn't bring either nation anything but more plight. This wasn't the right way to go about things. It wasn't humane. The people she hated were no different from you both. But she just couldn't see it the same way, her judgment clouded heavily by her need for revenge on Jinx. A singular person had shifted her perception about a whole group of people... and it was becoming suffocating. You couldn't recognize her anymore.
You were trying to find the right time to finally confront her about it fully, and thankfully, the opportunity came up one evening whilst she was going through paperwork in her office. You were pacing nervously around the room, trying to find the courage to speak your mind, but she beat you to it. "If you have something to say, then say it. I have work to do and can not be disturbed like this." She muttered, eyes focused on the sea of papers before her rather than your stilling form. Very well, she asked for it. "I... want this war to end. This isn't right."
Her hand froze before she hummed and resumed her task. "I thought we had moved on from this topic." She said calmly, not betraying how clearly irritated she was becoming. But you couldn't give up now. You'd go crazy if you did. "Caitlyn. There is no moving on from it if people are going to die as a consequence! How could you ever look away from that? Why can't you see that this is wrong? Why can't you see that Ambessa-" You stepped towards her grand desk with every word, hands coming down to push the paper she was holding away from her face. You just wanted her to finally look at you again after so long. "-Is playing with your mind!" "Enough. Don't you dare say another word."
The Kirammann stood up and towered over you, a strong hand grabbing onto your arm with a sharp shake that surprised you. Had the grief taken over her mind this badly? So much so that she couldn't see how much this was hurting you to lose her? "I demand you see reason and stop sympathizing with those treacherous animals... unless you want me to see you as one of them as well." "You think I'd betray you?" You breathed, and suddenly the realisation that you had lost her for good finally sunk in. You needed to go. Now.
Caitlyn's face sobered up at your question, yet before she could say a thing, her dear officer Nolan stepped in with a report in hand. Seeing the position you two were in, she nervously tilted her head. "Oh, my apologies, am I disturbing you-?" "-Not at all. In fact, I'm the one who's disturbing YOU. My apologies for that." Ripping your arm out of her gloved hand, you pushed past the girl and rushed out of the room.
Your girlfriend watched you disappear down the dark hallway before she straightened up and gave the officer a curt nod to go ahead with her report. But it was hard to listen to a word she was saying when Caitlyn's head was replaying the memory of your teary, heartbroken eyes over and over again.
》JINX
She didn't care about her life anymore. That was clear as day, and unfortunately, your relationship was suffering because of it. You knew that Silco's death had killed her inside, that his absence left her lost and confused. But you were so desperate to keep her together. So much so that you were practically destroying yourself for her well-being. Eventually, this boiled over when she was beginning to pull away from you. You, who had always been there. You, who she always cringed onto and begged to stay with her. You only had eachother now. It was impossible to think about a life without her now.
The unhinged spark in her eye had faded away and was replaced by an empty shell of what it once was. That scared you more than you'd like to admit. "Jinx... what are you thinking of?" You asked her one night whilst you quietly snuk around the dark lanes of your home. She didn't respond at first, and your eyes were focused on the back of her hooded head, wondering if she even heard you. But you know she had, when she came to a sudden stop. "... I... I think we should part ways, sweetheart. This ain't gonna go over well forever." She said in that hauntingly calm voice you've grown to hate. And you'd be lying if you said that you didn't see this coming.
"But why? We've always been together through everything. This isn't any different-" "-But it is! It's over! Jinx is over!" Facing you, you near flinched at her glowing, violet eyes, heart beating against your chest. She would never hurt you. You knew she wouldn't. And yet... you found yourself ever so slightly stepping away. Maybe that's what set her off in hindsight. "You're gonna leave me like everyone else anyway. Might as well beat ya to it-" "-I would never do that! What has gotten into you? You should know better than to think that-" "-You're scared of me, ain't ya?" You pressed your lips together when you realised that her mental state had gotten much worse than you expected.
She was losing it.
"In fact, I bet you're thinking of me the same way Vi does. You'll be so much happier without me. But... actually... what if you're going to backstab me like her one day?" The look on your face must've been horrific enough to sober her scrambled mind then because even she seemed to be unsure of what she's saying. And yes, you knew she wasn't doing well. You knew she was just saying things without thinking them through. But you were sick of it. So tired of it all. She could practically read your mind.
"W-wait, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that, I-" "-Okay... you're right. We truly would be better off going our separate ways." You were stepping away from her quicker now, and then you were running, your view becoming blurry and unintelligible. "WAIT NO, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME, I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I-" Jinx screamed after you, her breathing heavy and uneven, but she didn't go after you. She knew she had lost that right the second she opened her mouth.
You disappeared into the lanes, for the first time ever sprinting away from rather than towards her. And like the Jinx she was, she had screwed up another good thing up for herself. Perhaps deservingly this time.
》EKKO
Ekko was extremely busy with his duties lately and practically completely neglecting himself for them. It was very concerning to you and everyone, to say the least. Especially now that a war was practically forming at your front door from Piltover. And you were grateful and thankful for all he did for you. You really were. For that reason alone, you wanted him to take things easy at least sometimes to eat and sleep properly when he can. So, on the request of other members, you went to go looking for him one night before it was time for bed. He was sitting up in the tree, clearly planning to keep watch all night, like he usually did.
But you had come with a mission of your own and refused to leave until he came down to bed with you. "Ekko." You hummed as you finally reached him, a friendly smile on your lips. Balancing a nice basket of baked goods you had made yourself, you stepped towards his form that was beautifully illuminated in the moonlight. Seeing him here made you feel content and relieved since you were barely seeing each other to begin with anymore. Which you have been trying to be understanding about.
"I know what you're here for, and the answer is still no." The young man sighed with a shake of his head and frown. You weren't the first one to come by, that's for sure. "Hey... you know this isn't healthy. We're counting on you to stay strong for us, and you can't be that if you're starving yourself." You say with a slight falter to your smile, yet you tried to keep your tone playful and light. He, on the other hand, did not.
"I already told you that it's a no. Now go to bed and let me work." "But I made you these and-" "-I said, no." He hissed out, and that took you aback. He never raised his voice at you, nor did he ever have an attitude with you either. But the stress was getting to him badly, and so was the lack of sleep. "Why can't you just get that? How many times do I have to say it to get it through your thick skull? The least you could do is go and make yourself somewhat useful by patrolling, instead of wasting your time with this."
Oh, how his words cut you deep. Rationally, you knew that everything was just getting too much for him. But it didn't stop you from feeling hurt anyway, as your lip wobbled, and you slammed the basket on a nearby desk before quickly taking your leave wordlessly. Ekko froze at that and reached out to you, your name on the tip of his tongue, but the guilt stopped him from saying a thing.
"Fuck!" He cursed at himself, as he rubbed the bridge of his nose with a disappointed sigh. He definitely was losing it... and you unfortunately had to unfairly take the brunt of it.
》SEVIKA
"What did I tell you about running off when I tell you to stay put? You could have fucking died out there and then what?" Sevika was angry at you. Not that you could necessarily blame her since you did nearly get killed by an Enforcer earlier. But you had no real choice in this. You swore you didn't mean for this to happen. It was supposed to just be a quick errand run. You wanted to make her something nice for dinner, spoil her a little as a thank you for all the work she was putting into Zaun. Yet you couldn't explain any of this with the way she didn't let you even say a word now from the anger running in her veins. In fact, you had never seen her this enraged before.
"I am sick and tired of you disobeying what I tell you. I can't always be there and save you from everything, you know? I got better things to do and than to babysit you all the time-" "- I'm not asking you to do that either! I'm a grown adult, I can take care of myself!" You yelled back, absolutely angry now yourself at the way she always infantilized you like this. It always the same conversation and argument over and over again. You were so sick of it. You could handle yourself just fine and have proved this before. Yet she was so hellbent on proving you wrong every time, you couldn't take it anymore!
"I'm your partner, Sev. You're supposed to treat me like an equal." "I would, if you weren't so fucking incompetent. If I wasn't there, you would've been dead. Why can't you get that? Should I spell it out for you more? Dumb it down even more?" You hated when she was being like this. It was rare for a reason, and you despised this side of her. The side that was so prideful and egotistical. And you were trying so hard not to stoop to her level. It didn't help that you were a little injured and struggling to stand as is. "I'm not in the mood for this shit, I'm literally bleeding. Can we argue about this later, please? I just wanted to surprise you with something nice for once, and I get that I was wrong, but you don't have to be so mean about it, damn it!"
The tears in your eyes were betraying you, and the embarrassment of that just made you push past her and disappear into your shared bedroom. You'll just deal with the injury yourself. Sevika stared after you in slight surprise, considering it was rare for you to yell back like that and cry at that... but the sight of the flowers and half prepared food on the kitchen counter made the regret finally set in.
Perhaps you were right after all.
#arcane#arcane x reader#arcane x genderneutral reader#arcane x y/n#arcane x you#arcane vi#arcane vi x reader#pitfighter vi#vi#vi x reader#arcane caitlyn x reader#arcane caitlyn#caitlyn x reader#caitlyn kiramman#arcane jinx x reader#arcane jinx#jinx#jinx x reader#arcane ekko x reader#arcane ekko#ekko#ekko x reader#arcane sevika x reader#arcane sevika#sevika x reader#sevika
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"I'm not short, I'm just vertically challenged, fuck you!"
#Katie Cortèz-Jones#Adults {Verse 🎀🚬}#Repair and Rescue {Verse ⭐🔧}#RP#[her 5'3 ass chose violence i guess idk]#[shes not even mad idk what her deal is]#[i feel like garbàge and none of my muses will let me sleep]
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it kinda sucks cus i kinda want curly hair but i just KNOW my sister would lose her shit if i got a perm or something
#🙃🙃🙃🙃#and it sucks#like i know shed be sooo mad about it#idk bc she likes being the only one of us with super curly hair?? bc she dealt with a lot of bs bc if her hair growing up?#and would feel like i shouldnt have curls bc she had to deal with that and i wouldnt??#like idk for sure but i just DO know she'd be mad#and shes my closest sister and i dont want to like. burn that bridge ya know???#but also#curls <3<3#they look cute and i think id look cute with them#but#sigh#i know if i bring it up just to ask her she'll ALSO get mad#or just think I'm being an idiot who wouldnt know what to do or that id fuck up my hair or whatever#UGH#its fun bc its not even like i COULDNT have curly hair or anything. i just didn't get the gene for itband she did#shh ac
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officially have haters (some girl i’ve barely spoken to is talking shit about me just because i looked upset. as if that concerns her. somehow.)
#she literally looked at me and blurted out ugh why does she always have an attitude. like?? fuck off??#ik she was talking about me too she has said stuff like that to me before. please i wanted to say smth so bad#but i didn’t bc i had a ride to catch and i was already mad upset and i kinda regret it#she couldn’t even fucking say it to my face lmao literally had to say it behind me like i suddenly can’t hear ffs#mind u i’ve never done anything to her i’ve barely spoken to her and it’s only bc we share a class together#idk if she has a problem with me specifically or if my face just makes her mad IDFK#like i was genuinely tired and not having a good day. and then i had to deal w that#and i already don’t feel good about my face or the way i look but. honestly it’s whatever#i mean it’s confirmation that my belief that some people actually hate me was right but !!!! anyway i’m still tired blegh no one cares#idk man why let the fact that i don’t look happy upset you we don’t even know each other. kinda wanna know what her deal is sooo bad. idk#my text
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