#//Queerplatonic! Attraction! Is! A! Thing!!!

[angieblogging]

a beginners guide to… aromanticism.

so topic covered in this post will include:

what does it mean to be aromantic?

qpr vs romantic relationship

what is the aromantic-spectrum?

aro ≠ ace

a/n + other recourses

1. what does it mean to be aromantic?

an individual that is aromantic experiences no romantic attraction. that means they feel no romantic attraction, but can feel other types of attraction such as — platonic, familial, sexual, queerplatonic, alterous, aesthetic, emotional, sensual, intellectual. (these are the types of attraction i know, for the full list and descriptions check out this wiki page!)

each aromantic person can have a certain stance on romance such as romance repulsed or favourable. if you want to learn more about this topic check out this wiki page.

some aromantic people may be in a committed romantic and/or sexual relationship or a so called qpr aka a queerplatonic relationship.

2. qpr vs romantic relationship.

so to start this off i will say that the only people defining their relationship can be the ones in said relationship.

a romantic relationship is usually considered a relationship where two individuals are romantically attracted to each other and engage with each other romantically, such as kissing, cuddling, being committed exclusively to one another.

however the actions mentioned are not exclusive to romantic relationships.

a queerplatonic relationship is a relationship out of the binary. not a romantic or a platonic one. a qpr is not a stepping stone in between a platonic relationship and a romantic one. it is not necessary in between the two, it’s simply existent on it’s own.

what exactly is a qpr is hard to define as it means different things to different people and the only ones that can define it are the people in their qpr. some people are in a qpr where they engage in romantic and/or sexual activities, but feel no romantic attraction to each other, a qpr can be a fully platonic relationship with a sexual aspect or it can be just platonic, but their relationship exceeds the “norm” such as living together temporarily or permanently, raising a child together aka co-parenting. those are just a few examples.

3. what is the aromantic-spectrum?

it’s basically a spectrum of all the aromantic identities. someone who is on the aro-spec can feel little to no romantic attraction, some people feel it under certain circumstances or their attraction fades under certain circumstances. some, but not all labels on the aro spec include: demiromantic, aegoromantic, greyromantic, apothiromantic.

if you wish to read about more labels under the aro-spec check out this page.

all the labels on the aromantic spectrum have their sexual counterparts (ex. demiromantic — demisexual).

4. aro ≠ ace

so while aro and ace (short for asexual) communities are basically one big community (a-spec), it is important to note that aromantic individuals do not have to be asexual, some aros are asexual, some are just aro, some are aplatonic, so keep that in mind. one doesn’t equal the other. just cause someone is aro doesn’t make the asexual, however they can still be on the ace-spec. one can be aromantic and demisexual, many aro/aces use the split attraction model otherwise known as SAM.

SAM is there to basically help out to distinguish between romantic and/or sexual relationship, one is not tied to the other. some may be biromantic and asexual or homosexual and aromantic.

some aros choose not to use the SAM model and in this case they identify as a non-SAM aromantic. why they choose to use it can have many reasons, however they should also be respected as they can identify themselves however they want and truly own no one an explanation.

6. a/n + other recourses

i think this post catches the basics of aromanticism to the best of my ability. this is the basics and being aromantic is so much more complex than a couple definitions.

here’s a website you may find helpful! website

however i encourage you to do further research than just my post and that website. tumblr is a great place as well, there are plenty of aromantic blogs out there, like @our-arospec-experience @arospec-culture-is !

[dutybcrne]

Even with his orientation, you can bet Kaveh would be down to hook up with and even marry Faruzan if she were down to as well

[jacuzziwaters]

I WANT REAL THINGS

SOFT MOMENTS

FALLING ASLEEP ON VIDEO CALLS

SUNFLOWERS AND SMOOTH JAZZ

WAKING UP TO BREAKFAST IN THE MORNING

SOMEBODY TO HOLD ME

SOMEBODY TO HOLD

LAUNDRY

TAXES

COMFORT

WARMTH

SO MUCH LONGING AND YET

AND YET

AND YET

[braidedhades]

just found out that non-aromantics actually have feelings towards the people they decide to have a crush on. Apparently it’s not like, “hmmm should I consider this person for dating? what are the pros and cons here?” Or like, “I want to be really close friends with that person” But it’s like an actual emotional response or something? An emotion that is different from the “I wanna be really close friends” emotion??

also I just figured out that I’m aromantic

[qpr-culture-is]

romance repulsed (and indifferent) aro qpr culture is happily knowing you can have a close partnership without it being in anyway romantic

[artistic-argonian]

Found out today (if you're not in the UK like me, because I can never finish these things before midnight for some reason) is QPR day, and as someone who experiences (probably) queerplatonic attraction and thinks queerplatonic relationships are a beautiful thing, I felt like drawing something for the occasion.

[bloomshroomz]

Imagine:

an aro-centric friend-finding/qpr/dating/hookup/etc. app called "Cupid's Aro"

[gillipop-plus]

the #aro tag is full of stuff about nonromantic love and the #platonic relationship tag is full of stuff about qprs

debated posting this on @platonic-culture-is but that's meant to be a chill space for alloplatonic/grayplatonics and bringing up why i made it seems like a bad idea :/

[carmendeiact2whenplz]

Genuine question

For arospec people that have felt both romantic and alterous attraction at some point in their lives, or anyone who otherwise has personal experience with both of these things- What’s the difference?

Like I understand that they’re two different things but most of the answers are usually “you want to hang out in an emotionally intimate way but not kiss or be lovey dovey” or something but i’m bellusromantic so like that makes it way harder since i want to those those things

Also- if a qpr can be self-defined by its participants (you can have a qpr that is extremely similar to a romantic relationship but still call it a qpr), can the same thing go for alterous attraction? (feeling attraction very similar to romantic attraction but not calling it that due to romance repulsion and/or romantic attraction not fitting it that well)

[alterouslyinlove]

when you find yourself staring at his beautiful face and listening him talk about things you have absolutely no idea about… yes boy tell me everything. i love you.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

five is gay and arospec thank you for coming to my ted talk

[fairywithgremlintendencies]

Ppl who get angry (so much that apparently some even threaten) at mspecs, especially mspec lesbians because they seem to be so commonly hated for no good reason, really need to sit and think for a second. There are so many valid reasons why people choose to use multiple labels in this way. Their happiness does not affect you, grow up.

[i-dont-know-nor-care-go-away]

Apparently my standards aren't that high I just can't find anyone attractive unless I'm emotionally attached to them like. I can see their faces are like. Objectively nice but my brain only goes heeheee hooohoo and gives the dopamine if I am emotionally attached. That explains why I usually only think actors are hot in costume.....

[qpr-culture-is]

Autistic qpr is wanting to shower your best friend in affection and cuddle with them in a queer way while not being queer for them.

(Hope I did this right)

September,19,2023 3:25.

seems perfect fine to me /gen

(also I apologies for being so behind on the asks and submissions)

[angeltism]

pov delilah's skills of knowing when she likes somebun romantically vs knowing when xe likes somebun queerplatonically (both are incredibly bad but the all-seeing one's ability to know for queerplatonic attraction is like. nonexistent, basically. at least for romantic it can tell, even if it takes a moment..)

[alterouslyinlove]

hey guys what the fuhk? hey guys im actually dead now sorry no more posts? hey guys im literally kicking my feet and giggling? hey guys im madly in love? hey guys he THINKS IM COOL??? hey guys?