#yk. for people to make their own judgement

[liliallowed]

okay that may sound mean but again. I've made IT PRETTY clear I can't donate.

you guys are really starting to piss me off posing as victims.

how do I know? you WOULDN'T ASK SOMEONE WHO'S IN FINANCIAL STRUGGLE FOR A MORAL BARGAIN!

there's a fine line with the audacity.

get tf out of my blog.

just because I support Palestine doesn't mean I'm a door mat and you can use my emotions for personal gain.

kindly fuck off if you're a copy pasta bot acc. I WILL check your account and activity days and all your posts before answering.

and if I see an ask repeated? I'm going to block you. because you don't even take the time to friking READ my blogs first few words.

stop trying to benefit from the suffering of people you two faced scums. 🤬

[silaslich]

Mmmmmmmm Fae!Price taking part in the Spring Run where all the eligible people of his given court are let loose to mate in the forest. Tracking down that plump Tree Nymph!Reader who has been teasing him all year, she gives a good chase but isn't fast enough to Hide him. If she's giggling under her breath even as he manhandles her, even after she's scraped up and bleeding from the chase, Price doesn't seem to mind~

Anywayyyyyyyyysssssssss

Yk what? Fuck yeah! Gimme this old man in any context but fae?? You kiddin me??

Nsfw, smut, 18+, cherry popping, not enough prep, sex clueless reader, subject of celibacy

Wc - 7k :)

_____________________________________________

“Forgive me, my goddess, but I cannot accept.”

The undergrowth digs painfully into your shins and knees, you’ve lowered yourself at Artemis’ feet. At her mercy, begging her forgiveness. The goddess tilts her head, simply, eyeing you with a measure of sympathy. She can sense your unease, can practically taste your fear as it permeates the air. She smiles, softly. You feel her hand reach the crown of your head, smoothing over your hair, a gentle gesture of reassurance.

“Rise, my child” her voice is soothing.

Artemis crouches, slightly, meeting your teary eyes as your gaze darts up to meet hers. She extends her hand to you, pulling you up to stand straight as she does the same, she’s so much taller. Your eyes search her expression, to try and piece together her thoughts, there’s something else at foot here- but you’ve no gall to voice it. She doesn’t withdraw her touch from yours, not immediately, she lets her grip linger on your fingers, running her thumb over your knuckles.

“I would not ask you to go if I didn’t think it was your time” Artemis’ voice is soft, supple like honey that’s been left on a sun-caught windowsill.

You search her face, especially her eyes, you’ve more trust in your goddess than you do your own judgement. It’s a simple life you live, out beyond the reaches of any other creatures, tied up in your own company amongst the oak tree grove- content in the quiet and the mundane.

What she’s asking of you- it goes beyond your comprehension. It’s something you’ve thought about, yes, but it’s always been one of those things that’s felt totally out of your reach. Something that isn’t for you, instead you can look upon it with waning eyes and dream of it in slumber. Now, it’s becoming reality, and no matter how many nights you’d spend dreaming of such a thing- you’re not ready.

______________________________________

While you’re no stranger to court, it seems there is something in the air tonight, and you’re afraid you know exactly what it is.

Those that are here tonight will be joined by you tomorrow, taking part in the annual tradition that marks the beginning of spring, a changing of the season. The Spring Run.

Wherein the members of the chosen court are sent into the forest, with the soul purpose of mating. The thought makes your head swim, your vow of celibacy to Artemis had kept you from the yearly traditions, but everything has changed- with no explanation from your goddess as to why.

Usually, you’d find court amusing. Watching those around you, finding a quiet corner to placate yourself with wine and canapés, observing the behaviours and mockery’s that some tend to make of themselves after too much mead. You keep to yourself, but you aren’t rude, there’s a few familiar faces that you’re keen to see. It’s one of the few good things about coming to court, between the spectacular wine and the decadent food- catching up with friends is a welcome task for the night.

A night at court- frilly frocks and painted faces and enough wine and mead to drown a village- well, that’s perhaps an accurate prediction of tonight’s events. You wouldn’t be apposed, it would mean that tomorrow’s embarrassment would never come to be, you’d be able to keep your vow intact.

If the village were to drown you could return to your haven, back out into the depths of the forest where the air is crisp and clear, where you can taste home in the breeze. You could return to the sanctuary of the oak tree grove, blending in, standing as tall as they are wide. Hidden in plain sight. Away from the embarrassment of tomorrow.

Alas, Artemis had spoken, and you weren’t one to argue with a goddess. You trusted her word, more than anyone that had come before or after her. You knew her intentions for you were of pure intent, she wouldn’t have offered you up out of spite or any other ill fitting reason.

Your eyes watch the wine as it swirls in your chalice, following along with the melody that plays through the softness of conversation and the liveliness of the party. It’s too early in the evening to retreat home, there’s an etiquette to these things, you’d learnt. You favour the soirées in which you can arrive and show your face, have a few drinks and some idle conversations and then disappear home. Tonight isn’t one of those nights.

There’s a hand that fits itself to your bare shoulder, it brings your eyes up, you meet a pair of glowy green eyes. Your lips peel up into a smile.

“Hello Maren” you fold your free arm around the nymphs shoulders, bringing her into a hug. She smells of eucalyptus and sage.

Your name falls from her lips in a sigh, it’s been a long time since you’d seen one another, despite the fact the two of you had practically grown up together. She isn’t a tree nymph, but a naiad, a freshwater nymph- she had somehow ended up in the same maidenhood as you, both under Artemis. She lives far away now, back beyond territories, better suited to her and her needs.

“How have you been?” You ask her, eyes leaping across her features, she was always beautiful- even more so now she’s grown. Maren smiles, tucking a lock of auburn hair behind her ear.

“I’ve been good, thank you, what about yourself? I know these aren’t your kind of parties” Maren huddles close, her own chalice of wine held tightly between her fingers.

The two of you were quite similar back in the day, both preferring the quiet of home, not as brash and out there as some other members of the maidenhood, the ones that are no longer part of the maidenhood- for many reasons.

You smile, nodding, casting your eyes across the room- taking in just how vast the party had grown in such a short time.

“You’re quite right, I’d much rather be back home” from across the room, a pair of luminous blue eyes catch your attention, they shine like topaz in the low-light, encouraging you to look again. It’s John.

There’s something warm that creeps across your chest, and it’s then that you notice how exposed you feel. The silken robes hugging your flesh, a gift from Artemis, she’d said. Pale turquoise, complementing your supple skin. It’s as your chest tightens under the heat of John’s stare that it becomes apparent how little breathing room you have in these robes, sitting tight over your chest and waist and hips.

You’re quick to tear your eyes from his, it’s how it’s usually instigated, you catch each others eyes and then gravitate, without fail- each and every time the two of you happen to be at court together.

“B-but yes! Things have been good, grand in fact, so grand” your words spill quickly, too rapid for Maren to hear them coherently, she tilts her head and quirks a brow.

Maren had noticed your wandering eyes, she follows where your gaze had been glued to across the room. She smirks. Leaning impossible close, she whispers into your ear.

“Is that who you’re hoping will chase you down tomorrow?” Her voice has that lilt to it, the one that takes you back to being just a child.

Lying beneath the stars, listening to the owls, fingers laced together as you laugh into the night sky. Counting the stars. Dreaming of knights and princes, conjuring stories to tell around the fire. Fights between orcs and elves, kings that turn princesses to queens that birth babes who are as perfect as can be. Those days are cherished in your heart.

It’s with impeccable speed that your neck snaps in her direction, glaring eyes as she gifts you a huge toothy smile.

“Don’t be utterly ridiculous” it’s hissed through your teeth. “Do you know who he is?” It’s a confirmed suspicion that Maren does in fact not know who John is when she shrugs, not understanding the fuss.

Your free hand palms at your face, exasterbated by her nonchalantness, she has always been the same. You loop your arm through hers and pull her along, bare feet slapping against the stone floor, you need some air, and you need to get Maren out of John’s vicinity before she gets the both of you banned from court all together- forever.

The air outside is frigid, not quite warming with the breath of spring just yet. Alas, it succeeds in soothing that blooming heat at your cheeks, in your blood too- apparently.

Maren’s laugh catches, you watch it cast away with the wind.

“Does it matter who he is?” She asks, sincerely. Bemused by your sudden change, flush and in need of withdrawing from the mystery man’s watchful gaze.

The chalice makes a loud clicking sound as you place it against the stone balcony ledge with too much force. Some wine slips over the lip of it. You whirl around to meet Maren’s gaze, her pretty smile creeps up as she notices how flustered you still are, she knows she’s getting on your nerves.

“It matters because he’s part of the Queen’s council” your voice shortens, being too curt with your old friend, she takes no offence. “He’s an elf, It’s an insult to him at the pure notion of us pairing” you crinkle your nose, at his expense, not that you haven’t let your mind wander. Full of what ifs and buts.

Maren’s smile falls, ever so slightly, she can see the hurt in your eyes. Not because of her prodding, but because she can see that you genuinely think that you’re not good enough for a man of his standing. Whether it’s true or not, she hates that you’re letting it weigh on you. If a man doesn’t want you because your social standing isn’t as grand as his, then it’s his loss.

“Oh, my sweet” Maren steps closer, till she’s at your side. Her shoulder kissing yours, letting her head fall to your shoulder as you both gaze out into the night sky.

It looks the same as all those years ago. The crackle of the fire, the way the bats would sing over your heads. The whispers of stories from the old times and the giggles of stories from the new- back when you needn’t worry of your social stature or breaking your vows or how the world sees you. Back then the main strife you faced was having enough hours in the day to swim and forage and play and laugh- when it was simple.

You let the side of your head lean against Maren’s, a heavy sigh leaving you.

“I’m frightened” it’s an admission that comes from somewhere solemn, somewhere that you don’t delve into often.

Maren nods her head, her hair striking friction against yours. She’s warm compared to the night air, the smell of salt and lilac on her skin.

“I can only imagine” her voice cuts through your woes, she’s a grounding force right now. “But I think you’re very brave, and Artemis must think so too.” It’s honest. You can tell.

Before you can thank her, Maren startles, something behind the two of you making her straighten up. She had always been more in touch with her magic, a better sense of self preservation, Artemis always said. The two of you turn on your heels, facing off with the threat- or lack thereof.

“I didn’t mean to startle the two of you” John’s voice is gentle, something you find often of him, soothing in a way.

John is always kind, despite the stories that you hear stirred up at banquet tables, he’s always pleasant to you. It happens that you bump into each other like this, passing ships in a harbour, something drawing you in. Perhaps it’s his manners and his charm, the way he speaks to you as if you’re on a level standing with him. The others look down their nose at you, like you’re something that’s been tracked in under someone’s boot. It’s society, it’ll never change- but John is always kind.

“It’s alright, really, we were just getting some fresh air” your cheeks feel hot again, Maren stirs beside you. John’s smile doesn’t falter.

“Yes, much too hot in there, I was just about to go an get something to cool us down” Maren disconnects herself from you and goes to walk past John, heading back inside, presumably to get more wine.

You watch her as she goes, there’s a fleeting glance that she throws over her shoulder, a sharp smile that just about peaks out from the round of her cheek. She’s as sharp as you remember.

When you look back toward John, it’s clear that he hadn’t stopped looking at you, not even for a second. As Maren retreats he starts to step closer, replacing himself where Maren had been stood by your side. You turn yourself so that you’re looking out onto the land again, aligning your eyes with John’s. It’s hard to imagine living somewhere as grand as this, a palace of sorts, stone foundations and gardens that stretch as far as your eyes can see. It’s unimaginable, the stuff of little children’s dreams, dreams that you’d had once upon a time.

“I’m not sure I’ve ever seen her before” John breaks that silence, not because it wasn’t comfortable, but because he enjoys your conversation.

A smile cracks across your face. “Maren, she and I were children together. She moved away some years ago, this is the first chance I’m seeing her after quite a time.”

John lets his cheek come to rest on his hand, his elbow propped up against the stone top of the balcony ledge. His face is angled toward you, his eyelids low as he rakes his eyes over you. The way you continue to stare out into the night means that he can be unapologetic of where his eyes roam, your robes leave little to his imagination.

“Ah that’ll be it, then” John’s voice drags lower, his tone shifting. He sounds tired, or drunk.

Whether it’s intentional or not, John slides a little closer, his bicep flush to yours, a little off from the height difference. Pressed tightly together neither the less. You don’t mind it, John had never given you any reason to believe he had unsavoury intentions, you’d like to say that you trust him. If it weren’t to be true, you have Artemis’ protection.

“You look exceptionally beautiful tonight” John’s lips are close to your ear, you want to look at him, to analyse whether he is in fact drunk or not- but if you turn your head you’re afraid your lips might meet his.

Your lips grow into a thin line. “Thank you for thinking so, John” you appreciate his attempts to make you feel seen, maybe this is his way of making you feel better about what’ll come tomorrow- nothing.

A laugh breezes through his lips, something airy. “You’ve never given me a chance to say so before. By the time I’m free from the lacklustre conversation of the council members, you’re gone” he bumps his arm into yours, accusatory.

He’s not wrong. You don’t like to stick around these sorts of affairs, it would make sense that by the time he’s made appearances with the more important members of the court- you’re likely tucked up in bed back at the grove.

It’s a lot to think about in that moment. Perhaps this isn’t some drunken admission from a man as lonely as you are, to your knowledge. Maybe it’s something more, a genuine compliment from a genuine man.

“I apologise for that, I’m still not accustomed to these sorts of things, I hardly feel that welcome” it isn’t a dig for sympathy, it’s the truth. John frowns.

“Who has made you feel that way?” There’s a sudden concern in his voice, as if something serious has been committed in his court.

The gardens are abundant with wildlife, that much is clear, you watch an extraordinary stag as he trots across the grass. You watch him retreat, wishing you could too, away from the responsibilities Artemis has put on your shoulders.

“No one, not really, court just isn’t appropriate for someone like me John” a chuckle falls from your lips, you don’t know why you’re having this conversation with someone like John- because he won’t understand.

There’s a beat of silence, a stunt in the conversation at least. The noise of the party spills into the night through the open windows and doors, it mingles with the buzz of the fireflies and the rustling of the trees in the gardens. Suddenly, John turns to you.

“Come with me, won’t you?” He takes a step away, offering out his hand. You give him a strange look.

“And where would that be?” There’s amusement in your voice, intrigued by this socially elite man, for what reasons he’s entertaining you- it’s unclear.

John smiles, wide. “I want to show you the gardens, they’re almost as beautiful as you are, yet, they’re still something to behold” his tone shifts once again, in that slightly adverse way, like there’s something he’s not telling you.

Despite the way your head rings with uncertainty, you slide your hand against Johns, feeling as he grips it tightly. He pulls you with him, having you fall in step, a quick decent down a set of stone steps that lead down from the upper balconies, to the gardens.

John had been right- these gardens were breathtaking indeed. You can only imagine what they look like in the daylight, even at night they’re stunning. There are hedges that are as high as towers and trimmed back to perfection. The willow tree branches hang low around the pond at the very bottom boundary of the gardens, there’s fish that pop to the surface, catching flies that rest against the still water. Through the dark of the night the fireflies guide your way, hovering like stars, glowing like precious citrine. It takes your breath away.

The grass is crisp and cold against your toes, your bare feet sinking into the plush of the lawn, that too is trimmed and preened to perfection. It makes you smile, such a simple thing, a simple grounding thing.

John turns toward you, his hand still holding yours, he watches as you take it all in.

“Do you like it?” He asks, such a silly question, you think.

“It’s magnificent, John” your smile couldn’t get any bigger even if you tried, your only wish is to see it in the daylight.

John smiles, something small, it’s knowing. You try to shake it off, because now you’re sure there’s something he isn’t telling you. Why else would an elf be dragging you to the gardens? an elf of such high standing at that.

“There’s something on your mind, isn’t there” it’s not a question that you’re asking him, because you know, if you have something about you- it’s your intuition.

John nods, simply, it makes your eyes fall. You should have known, should have known better than to trust your terrible and feeble little heart when she jumps to conclusions- to fantasies. Then, John’s other hand is there, a finger lifting your chin, making you meet his eyes.

“I didn’t want it to come as a surprise for you tomorrow” his eyes are searing into yours at this point, you can’t look away. “I wanted to speak to you before the Spring Run.”

Your lip quivers. “Why?” You feel your eyes burn, welling with something you’ve never felt before.

John searches your face, eyes darting over every inch and freckle and mole and scar. Taking everything in like it’s the first time he’s seeing you. It’s jarring. The weight of his stare is unbearable, but you can’t move, you don’t want to move.

“Because Artemis heeded my prayers” there’s a crack in his voice, something vulnerable.

In that moment, the realisation hits you, it all makes sense now.

“I prayed for you and Artemis came to me, she tested my worth of you. It was clear to her that the object of our pairing wasn’t something lost to you, she told me of a dream you’d had. It was all she needed.”

John is taken aback by the force in which you kiss him.

______________________________________

You can’t remember the last time you’d had to run like this. As if your life depends on it. In reality, it doesn’t, but the leap of your pulse and the hammering of your heart is sure to make you believe it is so.

Brambles snag at your robes, scratching up your shins as you sprint. The majority of the others taking part had opted for going without clothes at all, perhaps it isn’t there first time, they understand this better then you do. It doesn’t slow you down, not even the sight of naked bodies pinned to the forest floor, rutting like animals, obscene noises finding your ears. It’s the first time you’ve seen such a thing, you understand the mechanics, Artemis had taught you- but you’d never been so close to it, not until last night.

Last night had been the beginning of the end. The searing brand of John’s kiss, the iron grip of his hands as they folded to your waist- pulling your hips flush with his. You’d gasped against his lips, feeling the solid length of him against your pubis, the way he was rocking himself against you as he stole your lips once more. It’s nothing like you had imagined it would be, it’s better, it’s otherworldly. There’s no explanation for it.

You didn’t want it to end, the reality that you would have broken your vows there and then for John is startling to say the least, he had been the one to slow things. Letting his lips drift from your lips to your cheek, holding your face in the cradle of his hands, pulling you close to press a kiss to the crown of your head. John speaks through heaved breaths, the swell of adoration in his eyes.

“Does this mean you’ll take me?” He sounds desperate, as if what you say next will sway the next course of his life, because of course- it’s true.

Your smile seems to be endless. “Of course I will John, but, I need to know where this has come from” your hand drifts up from where you’re cupping his neck, up to his cheek, brushing your thumb across his beard.

There’s a laugh that rumbles in his chest, like there’s something you’re missing, something obvious that’s gone over your head. To John, that’s exactly what has occurred here. He leans close to kiss your cheek again.

“I’ve been trying to court you all year, dove” he smiles, you’re taken aback. “The first time I saw you I knew it was over for me, and then we would speak and I would find myself even more lost than before” another kiss to your other cheek. Your lips gape, you feel silly.

“All this time I thought you were being polite, a gentlemen of court, how stupid am I” you screw your eyes shut, realising just how blind you’d been, hindsight is a cruel thing looking back.

John presses his lips against your lashes, a low rumble of disapproval in his chest. “You’re not stupid, dove, quite the opposite” you open your eyes as he retreats, but you can’t resit the urge to kiss him again.

Reality crashes as you do, tripping over the thick roots of a nearby ash tree, your instinct is to extend your hands to break your fall- silly idea. It leaves you scraped up, blood beginning to bloom from your palms and against the flat of your forearms. Your knees had taken some of the brunt, too, you feel as they sting from the dirt and thorns.

The sounds around you begin to die away the further you get from the others, retreating deeper into the forest. You hadn’t seen John earlier, not as everyone was readying themselves for the chase, but as he left you last night- he had promised to ruin you. It’s something you can expect of him, you don’t see him as someone to make promises he cannot make good on.

As well as you know forests, there’s something disorienting about all of this, it’s hard to focus on anything when you know what’s coming. When you know you’re being hunted, chased down in the other sense of finding a meal. Sating a different kind of hunger.

From out of the thick of the forest, a giant stag leaps into your path, maybe not the same one from last night- but he’s just as beautiful. You stand still, not wanting to scare him, without hesitating you bow your head in respect to him. He shakes his head, and without anything more he canters away, down through the thinning underbrush. You watch as he leaves, letting yourself become distracted- that’s when John seems to appear out of nowhere. His arms tighten around your waist and you let out a shrill scream, caught off guard, you can feel the air of his laugh against the back of your neck. His bare chest fits to your spine, pressed impossibly close.

“Found you, dove” he heaves, breath stunted from the chase.

“John” it’s a plea, the back of your head hitting his shoulder as you lean back, lips gaped as you suck in air.

He fits his lips to your throat, exposed from the angle, letting his tongue drift over your skin, leaving a trail of wet in his wake. The contact makes you shiver, you’d barely slept last night, too busy thinking of this. Thinking of all the ways John will ruin you, claiming you as his, blessed before Artemis herself.

“You and these bloody robes” it’s a growl, the sharp of his teeth teasing your skin. “Do you know how transparent they are? Hmm?” One arm stays circled around your waist while the other skates along your side, up over your ribs toward your breast. “Couldn’t risk looking at you half the time, would have to excuse myself” he kisses your neck “wouldn’t be very gentlemanly of me now, would it dove?”

Your breath catches. “I wasn’t aware” your voice is small, you’re not about to tell John that the only place you where the robes is to court. You have no need for them otherwise.

John hums, “yeah I bet” he doesn’t believe you, or he’s toying with you. He’s fully aware of your vow, so rationally he should know that you wouldn’t walk around in such a vulnerable manner as to attract unwanted attention. It appears, that’s exactly what’s happened, between you and John.

He wastes little time when he’s undressing you, tugging the sleeves of your robes down until it all pools at your feet. He whistles, hands roaming over the soft of your skin, over every mound and curve and round. You shiver at his touch, it burns, you’ve never been touched in such a way. You thought you’d feel vulnerable, scared even, not with John. His lips drag over the nape of your neck, inhaling your scent, moss and patchouli. Heady and warm. All you.

John’s lips follow the curve of your shoulder as you turn, needing to face him, his lips end at your collarbone. Then his eyes dart up, meeting yours, blue as the sky. You’d like to get lost in them, as vast as a thrashing ocean. You meet him half way when he leans in to kiss you, it’s that same intensity as last night, like he’s been waiting forever to finally taste you- maybe it had felt like forever. It grows quicker, John sucks in air through his nose, thick fingers gripping your naked hips, feeling the flesh bulge between the gaps of his fingers.

The adoration of a man is a foreign concept, while your vow was not to be broken, it wasn’t to mean that a man couldn’t desire you. Yet, over the years, you had never felt even slightly desirable. There were no lingering stares and unashamed glances, even if John was right about the state of your robes. If the bitter feeling of being undesirable meant that John is what is waiting at the end of it all, then you’re glad of it.

There’s not much telling of what happens between John kissing you with a new found fever, to when you find yourself pressed into the undergrowth. Twigs and shrubs digging into your back, with John between your legs and his palms either side of your head, kissing you with a heat that brands you like fire. He smiles against your lips, leaning back, you watch with narrowed eyes as he shucks his pants down till they’re at the mid of his thighs. His cock stands stiff between his legs, twitching in anticipation. Again, this is new to you, you’re not sure what to expect or what to do.

As if he can sense your doubt, John leans down close again, kissing the edge of your lips. “Don’t look so worried, dove, I’ll be gentle” he steals your lips again, balancing on one palm as the other cups your face, sweetly.

You do the same, holding him close by his cheeks. Breaking the kiss pulls a whine from his throat, it makes you smile.

“I’m not sure what to do John, I want to make this good for you, too” there’s a noticeable pinch to your brows, John tries to kiss it away.

“It will be fine, dove, more than I’m sure” he rubs his cheek against yours. “Tell me if it hurts, okay? Because it might, just for a little while” the octave of his voice drops, dipping low as he presses his lips to yours once more, the filth of it making your toes curl. All you can do is nod, there’s not much left in you.

As he kisses you, John presses his fingers against the mound of your pussy, testing the pressure. You jerk at his touch, angling your hips into the pressure of his fingers. You need more, all of him, you don’t care if it’ll hurt. One finger at a time, John parts the folds of your cunt, there’s a curse that slips past the seam of his lips when he feels how wet you are. He’s pleasantly surprised.

“Keep breathing for me” it’s whispered against your lips, you nod again, staring into his eyes- squinting when he breaches you with one finger, only adding a second after you start to ease up around the first.

He opens you up gently, beginning to curl his fingers inside of you when he feels your muscles stretch and ease- accommodating him. You can hear how wet you are, slicking his fingers and his palm, your chest feels tight and your toes curl. This, again, is something you’ve never indulged in- let alone had the touch of a man. You couldn’t have fathomed what it would feel like, you couldn’t have imagined for yourself just how good it is.

A noise hiccups from your chest, its whiny and desperate, “J-John” his name falls from your lips like a plea, he stops, worried it hurts. You shake your head like a mad woman. “No-no don’t stop! Please” the pitch of your voice rises, truly desperate. “I need you.”

John’s eyes blow wide, he curls his fingers inside of you, watching closely as your face contorts in pleasure- this isn’t nearly as much as you’ll need before he fucks you with his cock. He doesn’t know how to try and explain that. He swallows thickly.

“Dove” he presses his lips to your throat, tasting the salt of your sweat there. “It’ll hurt more if we try now” he eyes you, watching as you react to the way he continues to scissor his fingers inside of your tight hole.

You shake your head, dumbly, “I need you now John” you don’t take your eyes off of him, clenching around his fingers. “Please.”

While John knows what is the better option, he can’t find space to argue with you, if you’re telling him you can handle it, then he’ll have to trust you. Despite the fact that you’ve never done this before, John would do anything you ask of him- anything.

He simply nods at you, stealing another fleeting kiss. He retracts his fingers from your pretty cunt and uses your wetness to coat his cock, fisting it a few times to utilise every last drop. You watch him, carefully, noting the way his muscles flex as he moves. You had taken notice of how well built he is before, but now he’s naked right before your eyes, nothing left unseen. John spits into the space where his fist meets his cock, he’s trying to exhaust every option, he doesn’t want this to hurt more than it needs to.

Carefully, John begins to push forward, guiding his cock between the wet and warmth of your folds. You hold your breath, anticipating, watching John dutifully. He stills.

“I need you to breathe for me, dove” his tone is soft, spoken against your lips the closer he leans. You meet his eyes, nodding, your lip bitten between your teeth. You do as he tells you.

You feel as John’s cock begins to stretch you, inch by inch, you try your best to keep breathing. To open your hips wider, trying to better fit him. It does little to sate the burn. He frees up a hand to brush away the tears that fall over your cheeks with his thumb. His kisses distract you, his tongue delving past your lips to deepen the kiss as he guides another fat inch into your cunt.

“Oh gods” your nails clutch at his shoulders, digging into the flesh, trying to ground yourself. The burn is beginning to subside, if only slightly.

“Nearly there, dove, you’re doing so well” he soothes you, kissing your cheek, then your neck. Showering you with them.

You want to hold him tighter, pull him into you until the two of you melt together entirely, while the pain is still present- nothing has ever felt more right. It’s clear that John isn’t all the way in, you feel it when he adjusts, while you feel stretched beyond belief, there’s still more to go. He keeps still, beginning to tease your clit with the pad of his thumb as his eyes stay locked where the two of you meet. John watches the way your pussy weeps around his cock, dripping, stretched out.

He hums. “So pretty” he says it, absently, like he doesn’t realise he’s said it out loud.

Your body can’t help the way it jerks at his touch, the way his fingers play with your clit, adjusting pressure. Teasing you. Your chest heaves, quick succeeding breaths that punch out of you with every purse of your lips.

“M-move John, please” it’s melting away now, the pain and the sting, you want him to ruin you now- like he’d promised he would. You watch his lips curl.

“Yeah?” He brings his face closer to yours, the motion means more of his cock buries inside of you, another inch or so. “Want me to fuck this pretty cunt, dove? Need to look after you don’t I” you’re nodding with each word he speaks, at his mercy, under the weight of his stare and the heat of his cock as it swells inside of you.

With one deft arch of his hips, John begins to fuck you. It’s a new pressure, a new sensation that makes you gasp. Gripping him tightly, wherever you catch enough leverage- his skin will be a mosaic of your fingertips tomorrow.

You say his name again, and again and again. It’s a never ending mantra, with each push of his hips, with each cant of his pelvis as he begins to set a rhythm. It doesn’t take long for you to ease up, your pussy softening for the full length and girth of him as he bullies the rest of his cock into you. Pushed to the hilt.

“So wet for me” he adds, and ironically, you feel yourself grow even slicker, even his words make you melt.

“All for you” you surprise yourself, growing bold, feeding his ego as he does yours.

“All for me” he repeats it, coming closer, pressing his chest to yours. Fucking into you even harder than before, it makes your head lull.

John never stops the tirade of his fingers against your clit, while he adjusts the pressure and the angle, he doesn’t take it away completely. He doesn’t want you coming undone too quickly, he wants the first time to be something memorable. He wants to come with you, or at least come as close together as he’s able.

He feels your cunt tighten, swallowing his cock deeper, you’re getting close. And he’s not far behind. While this isn’t his first time like it is yours, he would argue and say it’s never felt like this for him. Like the two of you were moulded for one another, a perfect fit. In every sense of the word.

He hums, flickering his eyes down to where the two of you join, watching the milky wetness of your pussy gushing around his cock. It’s lewd, and he’s the first to admit that he loves nothing better, nothing beats how messy and sloppy and filthy this gets. He’ll enjoy treating you after all of this, he’ll have you cum on his tongue, he’ll show you how messy he can really make you.

“You close, dove? Do you feel it?” John frees a hand, pressing his palm over the swell of your tummy, all soft and plush under his touch. You nod, lips quivering, there is indeed a knot coiling in your stomach beneath where his hand lays.

“Feels so good, John” you manage to make the words legible, not a gargle of words that’s lost to his senses.

It pushes him to quicken his fingers as they work at your clit, matching the rhythm of his hips as he delves deeper, the angle of his cock catching something deep inside you that only stokes the flames- making you gasp.

“Nearly there” he ushers, softly, brushing the hair out of your eyes as the sweat makes it stick to your forehead. “Doing so well for me dove.”

John feels it, the way your nails pierce his skin, watching as your mouth falls open in a silent cry. Your pussy clenching, squeezing him impossibly tight. He fucks you through it, uttering praises in your ear, chasing his orgasm as he fucks you through your first. It seems like it never ends, like you’re dragged through the cusp of it, only to realise that it continues on- like blowing out a match and still seeing as the smoke plumes.

You cry John’s name between gods, clutching at him, pulling him close until his chest squashes yours. Slicked and sweaty together. There’s a few cruel pistons of his hips, you can’t get away, not from how close you hold one another. It hurts then, the way his hips flatten to yours, one final deep pump of his hips as he stutters- cumming inside of you. It’s warm, it’s strange, it’s another one of those things that you hadn’t thought deeply enough about how it would feel. It’s as addicting as everything else.

He growls, he sighs your name, he holds you imposingly tight. Neither of you can breathe properly from how tightly you clutch at each other, but neither of you want to move- not for all the coins in the world. Nothing has ever felt as right as this, the doubt and the worry that you’d felt before seem to melt away with every other coherent thought you’d had before all of this.

Through the haze and the afterglow John begins to grow soft inside of you, allowing some breathing room but keeping you close, he pulls you to lay against the harsh undergrowth with him so that he’s still seated inside of your pussy- plugging you with his cock so his cum stays where it belongs. You stare at each other, noting the sweat and the flush of your cheeks and chests. Your heart is still singing, racing impossibly quick. John smiles and you can’t seem to fight it either, toothy and dumb.

“Is it always that good?” You ask, no longer shy. John laughs, all breathy and loose.

“I’d like to think it would be, dove” his smile reaches, crinkling his eyes, you want to kiss the crows feet by his eyes- one of the many features you adore on him.

“Can we do it again?” Your lip is between your teeth, your hands holding his cheeks as you smooth over his skin with your thumbs. You feel as his cock begins to stiffen inside of you.

“Fucking hell” it’s all John manages before he’s fitting his lips to yours once again.

[sl-vega]

08; operation: first (study) date!

project: love liason! - a scaramouche smau

You shut off your phone as you heard the ever so familiar voice of your best friend whisper-shout your name, even when she was slightly irritated at you and your carelessness.

Mona huffed quietly as she approached you, binder in her arms as she adjusted the tote bag hanging on her shoulders, her dark raven locks pulled into her iconic high twin tails as per usual.

"Good, you finally managed to spot me. Where is everyone else?"

"Oh- About that...a ton of people cancelled last minute, so it's just gonna be us and two other people, Childe and some other guy in my class. I think you know him..?"

"Really? Who-"

Mona was about to ask you something -presumably the identity of the other tag along- before cutting herself off as her eyes widened briefly before being rolled in slight annoyance, though she did still have a slightly teasing grin spread across her lips.

"-is this just some ploy to get some alone time with Childe while you pawn me off to some stranger?"

She asked, a mild accusatory tone present in her voice.

"Maybe..?" You answered, albeit a bit bashfully, she was gonna kill you once said 'stranger' appeared.

She sighed before shaking her head and chuckling dryly.

"You've got it bad. Fine, I'll play along. You owe me though."

A beaming smile spreading across your face, you gently tackled Mona into a big hug.

"Thanks! You're the best."

"I know, what would you do without me?"

She said, feigning arrogance, she gave your shoulders a quick squeeze and you a soft smile before glancing over at two figures behind one of the bookshelves you were right next too, a voice you were all too familiar with letting out a bark of laughter beyond the barrier of books.

Auburn hair, ocean blue eyes, that same hearty laugh that you could recognize in a split second every time it echoed through the hallways-

-shortly accompanied by a sharp violet gaze snapping you out of your trance and realizing that you probably looked very pathetic right now.

"So then Teucer was like- Oh! Hey (Y/N)! Hi Mona!"

He waved at the pair of you, God, that smile...

"Hi Childe!"

You just barely managed to squeak out, earning you a subtle judgemental glare from Scaramouche, who simply offered you a quick nod and quiet 'Hey.' and a brief glance at Mona. Knowing that both of you were nervous wrecks (in your own ways of course) around each of your respective crushes put you at ease. If the two of you were going down, at least you'd be failing together.

"You?!"

Mona exclaimed, glancing at you, then Scaramouche, repeating the cycle a few times before fully turning to you and shooting you a glare.

"You never asked who specifically was coming..?"

You muttered under your breath as Mona seemed to get a little more agitated, noted, loop holes weren't going to help your case...

You would say it was gonna be a long day, but knowing Mona, she might not even let things start at this rate.

additional notes:

y/n fawning over childe as if THE scaramouche isn't literally right in front of her and crushing on someone with zero intrest in him atm? (if i were her i'd be switching sides so fast)

^ vee making commentary on her own series as if she's a reader because yes, i AM that desperate for more engagement

childeyn + scaramona moments next chapter!

yes ik that these pairings are not what ANY of you came for but they help the plot continue plotting yk

scara even called y'all princess last chapter that should be enough scarayn to last you

sorry for such a boring a/n, this chapter is just to set up the NEXT one which i promise will be a lot more entertaining! <3

𝜗𝜚 SYNOPSIS: you're head over heels in love with childe, and scaramouche is (begrudingly) smitten with his "rival" mona. and, by sheer divine coincidence, you both happen to be the best friends of each other's objects of affection, so you strike a deal with each other. if scaramouche helps you ask out childe, you'll set him up with mona. so with the annual spring formal right around the corner, the two of you vow to be each other's wingmans so you can end your junior year on a high note (and maybe even kick off your senior year with a new relationship!). between, scheming, planning, and researching, you and scaramouche find yourselves developing a new relationship via helping each other out. now the real question is whether this friendship will remain as a pure platonic bond, or blossom into something more?

<PREV ll MASTERLIST ll NEXT>

🎀 - taglist!; (1/2)

@agaygothicmushroom @035814 @freyao7, @sketcheeee @tsukimara @shyentsmissingink @peachystea @aries-afk @lxkeeeee @sakiimeo @sugxryratz @shutingstar @lalaloveallmydays @bellflower1257 @haruumei @kichiyosh1 @littlemisssatanist @dee-zbignuts @candyescapism @crimxeorcremeexistspeacefully @h3ll0-kitty-4lly @franaby @la-cursii @heusalettle @automaticpatroltragedy, @c4ttheart, @meigalaxy @misswetty @introvertaku02, @daiyunjin @trulyylee @lily-lmao @kazumiku @kunikuzushis-darling @vitanye @livelaughlovekuni @imnotyizhuo @akagi0021 @rook-kisser @mitsuribe @scaraenthusiast1 @chemiru @193i3 @matolka @tamikahoshiko @jayzioxx @samyayaya @dontmindtheevie @v3ntis-lyr3 @blvdmrcnry

[hp-hcs]

yanxidarlings here~ literally screamed when i saw you followed me because your writings were the direct inspiration for my latest post 💖 but im curious to see your take on yandere! poly! mattheo and theodore with m! reader or just more poly headcanons because i am never. going. to. get. enough. of. them

OH MY FUCKING GOD UR KIDDING I WAS THE ANON WHO REQUESTED UR LATEST POST

IM FEELING STARSTRUCK RN 🙇‍♂️👑

requests open, please dear god

Yk, reader is (lovingly) so fucking oblivious

Like, his friends will be like “hey you’re getting pretty close with like, the two most obsessive and violent guys at this school aha”

And reader will be like “lol they’re so silly goofy aren’t they 😌”

Inspired purely by your “you know people think we're gay and dating, right?” “aren't we?” I present:

“you know people think we’re gay and dating, right?” “aren’t we?” — yandere! mattheo riddle x oblivious! male! reader x yandere! theodore nott

completely unedited cause i gotta sprint to my lecture broski

TWs: possessive/obsessive behavior, brief mentions of violence, one instance of slut-shaming (?)

••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Honestly, you thought nothing of it when you were informed that due to “space issues” you were being moved to room with The Theos™. You just shrugged and followed the very anxious house-elf who had informed you of the switch to your new room.

Your trunk and belongings were there already, waiting to be set up and organized. Mattheo and Theo were hovering in the doorway looking a bit too pleased with the situation for comfort.

You just quietly said “hi” and moved past them, dumping your school bag on your new bed and flopping down next to it.

Theo and Mattheo practically trip over themselves rushing to “befriend” you. (Their words, not mine)

You all share a dorm, so it wasn’t long before they realized the other was obsessed with you.

Then, it’s all out war.

I’m talking mysterious falls down the moving stairs, getting locked out of the dorm all night, randomly being chased by bludgers—even when they aren’t playing.

Random fistfights between them whenever they see each other in the halls.

That all goes out the window, though, when reader is asked out.

Reader comes back to his dorm after a long day and finds The Theos sitting side-by-side on the edge of the his bed.

“When were you going to tell us that you became the class whore?” Mattheo drawled, his lips thinning in disapproval and disgust.

“W-what?” You ask, completely taken aback.

“We heard that little Y/N L/N’s got himself a date to the Yule Ball,” Theodore adds. “Who is it? That Parkinson girl? The Diggory boy?”

“Wh- no. I said no anyways.”

The boys scrutinize you, exuding an air of judgement.

Finally, Theodore pipes up. “Good boy.”

😳

“Aww, what’s this? Look, Riddle. Y/N’s blushing,” Theodore teases.

They make a quick mental note of that 📝

Anyways, they eventually find out who asked you out. They call a ceasefire on their own personal war, and team up to beat the shit out of the poor guy/girl.

After that, babycakes, if they didn’t already know before, everyone at Hogwarts now knows that you are TAKEN. (Even though you don’t.)

They tolerate each other, but just barely. They can really only stand each other when you three all curl up in one of your beds or on the common room couch.

Then, they’re the clingiest mfs you’ve ever met.

They have absolutely no sense of a personal space bubble. One of them is always touching you in some way, whether it be holding your hand, resting a hand on your hip or shoulder, putting their hand on your lower back…

Theodore charmed your chair in History of Magic to be impossible to move, so you can’t scoot away from him.

If you’re relaxing on the couch in the common room, Mattheo will move to sit right next to you (like r i g h t next to you) and put your legs in his lap. He tried once before to get you to just sit in his lap, but you told him no (like an idiot) and avoided him for the rest of the day. That is, until you woke up to him in your bed next to you.

Homeboy was not happy about that.

He is manipulative as fuck and will gaslight you to no end. He uses his shitty childhood and bad father to get you to pity him.

(It works.)

It’s obviously disconcerting for you when your boyos go from ‘actively out for each other’s blood’ to ‘eh, you’re fine, i guess’

You guys were watching a movie in your dorm one night, all piled onto your bed, and they accidentally fell asleep there. They woke to you already gone for breakfast and them with their arms around each other.

“If you ever bring this up again, I’ll kill you.”

“Oh, believe me, they’d never find your body.”

They become way more open about their attraction to you, everything from kissing your cheek, to making you wear their clothes (esp their jerseys with their last name on them), to asking you your ring size.

I completely agree with your headcanon of Mattheo neck kisses 😩🤌

Eventually though, because you are an oblivious gay disaster, you’re just chilling on the couch and you’re like “Hey guys, you know everyone thinks we’re gay right? And like, all dating each other?”

“What, like we aren’t?”

y/n: 😳🤨☺️🏳️‍🌈👨‍❤️‍💋‍👨

[19burstraat]

unbelievably specific modern things the crows would love. too bad they live in a late-1800s fantasy world

Kaz: screenshotting nfts, those web weaving posts about dog metaphors, leaving people on read, stealing from the self checkout in supermarkets, emo phases, wearing headphones but not actually listening to anything so they're just there just as a conversation deterrent, winding up scam callers, escape rooms, pretending to know nothing about pop culture in order to annoy people, playing solitaire online, Knowing A Guy for everything

Inej: social media sleuthing, posting goodreads quotes, strictly come dancing, snoopy, easily accessible climbing shoes, mr darcy, shouting at the screen when someone's judged incorrectly on a competition show, getting unbelievably competitive about wii sports/duolingo scoreboards/goodreads goals/animal crossing islands/air hockey, texting..... With loads of elipses... Like your parents.... and dropping unprompted wisdom in them.....

Jesper: neon clothes, the 💯 emoji, making everyone as miis on tomodachi life but being so bad at it that kaz and nina's miis end up getting married, lisa frank art, scamming people on depop, cheap jewellery that makes you go green, complaining about how cottagecore videos don't correctly represent the Rural Farm Life, shitty 2000s club bangers, the kitsch movement, giving your car a name, hoiking your novelty socks really high so everyone can see them, shitty christmas films, first person shooters

Wylan: speedpaint videos, joe hisaishi, being judgemental about other people's spotify wrappeds, djungelskog, that gif of the japanese mascot costume running through a bunch of explosions, watching weird low-budget adaptations of shakespeare plays with kaz, those arcade crane games, piercing your own ears with a needle and a lighter then being somehow surprised when it gets infected

Matthias: making an instagram account in-character for your dog, posting low-quality graphics of inspirational or biblical quotes on facebook (yk the ones w the landscape or sunset behind them), taking frowning selfies from below like your granddad does, viking media of any sort, buying dozens of identical t-shirts from big tesco, mixing up celebrities all the time, perpetually caving and giving the scouts/guides/youth groups/football clubs/carollers/etc money for their fundraisers

Nina: making bait posts online in the style of 'why can't we just print more money', period dramas, wearing huge mother of the bride style hats to weddings, saving recipes/crafts/art ideas on tiktok and then never actually doing them, pink gin, tiktok edits of fit celebs/characters, 3 hour video essays abt pop culture, saying 'break up with him' in response to every relationship woe, buying cheerful tat from flying tiger

[pandorasfavorite]

STOP OMG HI, yk the promo the tjd had with Santos and this new group or whatever. N how Dom didn't tell the judgement day , can the reader also be in there and jd doesn't have to exist that's up to you but can you do something like the reader notices how the girl with the pony tail i think her name was elektra lopez but like she was flirting with dominik right infront of the reader and the reader gets jealous and ignores dom the whole night? YOU CAN MAKE UP THE REST BUT THATS ALL TYY I LOVE YOUR WORK BTWW

Petty Antics

AN: Am I the only one who hates re-reading my work for mistakes? It makes me want to propel off of a bridge or sum. Thank you for loving my work- I love you 🩷.

“Hey! What’s up guys!”, Dominik throws his hands up and smiles when they walk in. Santos greets Dominik while everyone stands back and watches with overflowing confusion. You most of all. When he pulls back you smack him on the chest and scold him, “You didn't tell us we had company”. Everyone else nods and Rhea glares at Santos's group. While you are staring at this new group of people (that only Dominik knew), Damian pulls him to the side by the arm. However when you see the angry look and a vein popping out on Damian’s forehead; you start to watch more closely. You really hated the hard grip he had on Dominik’s arm out of the whole situation so far. It’s clear Dominik was embarrassed to be confronted in front of his friends and nervous by the encounter. So when he walked back over with a jittery look you couldn’t help but put a comforting hand on his arm. “You’ve done it now”, Rhea also scolds him. 

Dominik looks at you, “Mami, can you talk to Priest? Tell him not to get so mad?”, he asks and rocks on his feet nervously. You bite your lip and consider how you would talk to him, but you know it would come better out of Rhea’s mouth. You turn to look at her with an exhausted expression, “Could you?”. Her shoulders drop a bit but she agrees anyway and she talks to Dom again, “We need to get this communication back under control”. She reminded him with no room for argument. Quite frankly you had to agree with her, out of everyone you thought Dominik would tell you. After all, you were his soon-to-be wife, and keeping secrets was a quick ticket to trouble. Now it was your turn to reprimand him, “Communicate okay? Now deal with your friends”. 

He rubbed a hand over his mouth while you sternly spoke to him. He hated it when you were mad at him with a burning passion. It was one of the worst things he had to endure. “Everyone! Meet Judgment Day! Mami, Rhea, Finn, JD”, you glare at the group; not hiding your dislike. You cross your arms and stay closed off much like the rest of the group. From beside you, Rhea is in her own world as you were, until a hand reaches out to touch you. You smack the guy's hand away, “Don’t touch me” you grit. When you said that Dominik’s smile dropped and he looked at the guy, ‘hey hey’ he peered through him. The same guy put his hands up and smiled at you and Dominik both. At that, Dominik lightened up again but you refused. At this point, you thought nothing could make this situation worse. 

From that point on Dominik spent his time trying to entertain his friends while you stood beside Rhea and Finn to the side of you. Of course, JD lingered in the back not saying a word; just as you liked it. You found solace in standing beside your friends without looking at your Finance spend his time with people he barely knew. But when Rhea whispered in your ear to “look up”, you could’ve burst into flames. Elektra or whoever the fucks she was reached out and touched Dominik’s hair. In other words, she was trying to take your man on how he looked. Dominik’s nose scrunched up at the interaction and just stepped back not paying much attention to it after that. He moved away from her and tried to continue what he was doing. What you would’ve preferred was for him to call you over; especially considering the fact you were 10 feet away. Then not even 2 minutes after he shifted away from her she was reaching out to trace the tattoos on his arm. 

This had to be a joke; like someone had to be playing a prank on you for this to actually be happening. Now you personally wouldn’t consider yourself a jealous person; others happen to disagree. But only yours and Dominik’s opinion matters really. And when Dominik agreed that you were a jealous person; you had tried to dial it back for his sake. Though bitches stay pissing you off. Some things are so clearly flirtatious and should not be said. Originally you had believed that every woman had a good sense of right and wrong, but this girl Elektra didn’t seem to understand. And on that note, no matter how dramatic it may have been; you took Rhea’s hand and stormed out of the room together. You slammed the door to the point it rattled on the hinges. 

From inside the room, everyone’s eyes went dime-size, and Dominik whipped his head around to find you. Only for the realization to dawn on him that you were the one who left in a hurry. He sputtered out an excuse to leave quickly and threw open the door to follow after you. You had just made it around the corner of the long hallway, when you hear Dominik yelling after you. Rhea turns to you with wide eyes, “What are you gonna do?” she says in a hushed whisper. You cross your arms and stick your chin up, “Be petty and ignore him”. You hear his yells get closer and your exposure drops. Dominik skids around the corner and sighs a breath of relief when he sees you. He jogs up to you and spins you around by the waist to face him, you have to fight the urge to smile on instinct. “Why’d you leave?”, he commented and looked down at your angry face. 

You push his hands off of you, only to turn to Rhea and whisper in her ear. She raises her eyebrows at you but you return with a stern look. She then echoed what you said to her, to Dominik; “She said that she isn't talking to you”. Rhea was quick to turn around and walk away from you both. When she turned around Dominik put his hands around the sides of your stomach. “Mami”, he drawled and kissed your cheek sweetly. You turned away from the kiss and averted your gaze. Dominik was already getting so desperate for your attention. He tries to kiss your cheek but his lips chase after you when you move away. Now Dominik is practically pouting when he follows after you down the hallway and back into the very room you stormed out of. 

There everyone was sitting down and waiting for the group appearance in 2 hours. Normally the waiting game was already boring as is. But for Dominik, it felt like hell. When he’d sit beside you, you’d scooch away and smack his hands away when he tried to touch you. Committed to the end. He stared at you with crossed arms and listened to you talk to Finn with no issues. He was jealous of everyone else you talked to. Finn walked away to play darts with Finn and instantly Dominik was pressed against your side, whispering in your ear. “If you talk to me, we can go into the bathroom”, he said and you could practically feel his smirk against the side of your face. You turned to look at him with a sharp glare, only to turn away from him again with no words. He sunk into the couch with a groan, it was giving toddler. 

When it came time to go out into the stadium, Dominik pulled you to the side in the hallway on the way there. “Princesa, talk to me”, he murmured as he kissed the side of your neck. You pushed him back by the head and his shoulders dropped. Before you could turn around he pulled you back to him, “Baby what did I do?” he breathed. Only to be ignored once again. It could probably be read on Dominik’s face how annoyed and frustrated he was getting. He was used to talking and hugging you anytime you had been around. But all his questions were answered when a clip from earlier came up on the big screen. They aired your pissed-off expression while he was paying attention to Santo’s group. The light switch went off in his head when he looked over to you and the disgusted look on your face at rewatching it. 

Therefore when you all walked back and out of the eyes of thousands, he really gave you no choice when it came to pulling you into an empty room. He took you into the room and closed the door. Then instantly took your hands in his, and sunk to his knees in front of you. He looked up at you and began to apologize, “I’m sorry mami. I should’ve kicked them all out when she did that, but I was trying to make a connection for The Judgment Day. That’s no excuse though, I’ll do better. You’re my one and only mi amor” he enunciated. The apology was perfect, he knew what he did wrong and him being on his knees surely did help. You stay quiet for a minute and Dominik’s face drops, “Mami you're killing me here” he murmured and put his head on your thighs. You put your hand in his hair so he would look up, “I think that was the best apology yet” you remark with a smile. He pops up off the floor and kisses you to make up for all the ones you had ignored. 

[kuzure-collapse]

I'm absolutely in love with ur lobro fic, its actually driving me insane. I just need more interaction between the mc and my darling neighbor boi. God i love that the mc has like that pathetic alpha male ish world view, yk? I think its fun to explore the more toxic and unflattering minds of certain men, yk? God i just need more of this fic.. i just wanna see more of the bad sides from the love interest!

Oh and i do have a question, how would the love interest react to mc wearing a maid dress. Maybe tomoe made then wear it and she stole his clothes so he has to run after her so he can change. I think it would be both hilarious and funny

since he's the first LI introduced, i had a lot of scenes noted down for tomohiro from the beginning. the challenge is just balancing it with the other LIs and making sure the progression is slow and natural.

i'm glad my story could portray a different worldview that people don't normally see in romance fics like this! i wanted to capture a "boys will be boys" vibe with this one and used interactions between my own irl male friends as references, both good and bad.

i think a lot of us women have this standard of perfect prince charming type men in a similar fashion to how men have a standard for perfect princess-like women, both of which are just fantasies. nothing wrong with wanting such an ideal, but i like characters with a bit more dimensionality and flaws. something more than "he's cold and emotionally constipated"

i do have a maid dress chapter in mind, but more for yanagi instead (and another one for kotose). Since I had free time recently, I wanted to practice drawing from one of the pics I saved in the pinterest folder and here this is. i feel like i always draw yanagi with diego brando in mind

You’ll know the context in a future chapter, but if you're caught up, you'll have a good guess as to why they're dressed like this lol

---

and yes, LI's reactions to mc in a maid dress:

Tomohiro:

very amused, immediately starts teasing mc and giving him orders

examines the fabric and plays with the frills, absentmindedly lifts the skirt as he's checking out the apron

"oh sorry-- haha"

flirts with you like you're a girl and asks you to call him master

had tomoe hide your clothes in his room

Kotose:

horrified, turns away flustered

"the hell are you wearing?!"

hates that a part of him likes the look

would offer to find you new clothes to change into

conflicted the whole time as he hears you undress

if he hears "i need help with the zipper..." he might die

Satsuma:

you thought he'd be judgemental but you've never seen this guy smile so wide, even sounds like he's giggling

his smile is disturbing when he shows his teeth

gives a nod of approval and expresses support for your choices, even though you didn't say anything

offers to walk with you in case you get attacked by weirdos for the way you're dressed

[ ~o((>ω< ))o~ ] [ o(*≧▽≦)ツ] above his head the whole time

Yumeki:

smiling and giggly, a little red, but not he's not feeling flustered

compliments your look and comforts you, saying you look cute and there's nothing to be ashamed of

"here, I'll take a picture to prove it!" to show you how great you look

it was more for himself though

"if you don't want the costume, i can take it" he would secretly wear it himself

Yanagi:

if he wasnt also in the same situation, he'd be snapping pictures and cackling

makes fun of him obviously, "who's attention are you trying to get?"

realizes from certain angles, mc kinda looks pretty. pouting and angry and flustered...

suddenly goes quiet and pokerfaced as he realizes he just found you attractive, turns and walks away, totally ignoring you

cant find the motivation to delete the photos and vids though

[the-sun-is-also-a-star]

positions marauders characters would play in exy

JAMES: I know he's canonically a chaser so i think he'd be a pretty good backliner. He certainly has the height and muscle mass for it. It's a less glorious potion than striker obviously but if a team has a good backline they're solid so I think it's fitting for him.

SIRIUS: I think sirius would be able to play both a backliner and striker position so ideally I think he's a dealer. Dealers start off the game and then they may work as either an additional striker or an additional backliner as needed during the game. Its an exhausting and riveting position and I think he'd thrive in it.

PETER: now Peter I think would be a great backliner because again, otherwise takes a lot of grunt work. His height is not too short so I think he'd be at not too bad of a disadvantage but I think he'd be a good backing to the team.

REMUS: people aren't going to like this but goalie. it's a position that doesn't require a vast amount of movement. his height would be a FANTASTIC advantage (sorry andrew you're a short king i love you please don't stab me) and i think it would just work really well for him. also yk how in ice hockey teams are VERY protective of their goalies??? I like the thought of that for him.

LILY: now this is a striker if i've ever seen one. I think she's quick and agile enough to manoeuvre away from whoever is marking her. She'd probably play with a light-weighted bat and I think she'd be DAMN good at it

MARLENE: my girl is a striker but in a VERY different way from lily. Her preferred method is brute force and she WILL tackle you to get the ball. she will punch you first if she feels like you're on her ass too much and there hasn't ben a single game that she hasn't got a yellow card.

MARY: now this is a tricky one but i see a lot of allison in mary so i'm gonna go with dealer for mary as well. she's adaptable and she plays according to what her team needs.

DORCAS: i'm going to go with dealer for her too i think she'd be really good at snap judgements and reading the situation as it needs to dealt with. she's a key player in deciding how a game goes and filling in the gaps as they need

PANDORA: now panda is a goalie too i think. mostly because she DEEPLY reminds me of renee but also i think she's too passive to be either striker or backliner so i think her most advantageous position would be goalie. She'd play first halves and would be GREAT at reading people to know where they wanna score from.

REGULUS: goalie. this saga was created bc this was the first connection i made. he's not suited for offensive or defensive positions on the court but he'd be FANTASTIC at blocking people out. his speed would make him an advantageous striker no doubt but i think it would ALSO benefit in him fucking with people psychologically. he would let people take a shot without moving before he's SPEEDING to block out what would have been a CLEAR shot to absolutely crumble the psychological strength of the strikers

BARTY: this is one insane backliner. he fouls left and right. he plays absolutely FILTHY but he's damn good. he will STAY on his marks ASS until they throw the first punch which was his plan all along. he's fast, he's strong and he's absolutely brutal

EVAN: striker. he's fast a whip and he's strong to boot. he trips people on his racket, he scores from the absolutely shittiest angles yet he still somehow manages to hold his own. he pushes as good as he gets from backliners too.

i'd like to thank @oddbrainedtboy for listening to my insane rant about this even though he has no interest in aftg whatsoever

[zinkysworld]

Boxten stole some of his face in a much much later stage of his twisting and it wasnt *that* bad but as a perfectionist does he did and picked at it and made it worse... okay maybe it was more than pick at it but yk he can get a L O T worse and he's still technically sane here- like, integrated into gardenview and still around the other toons and staff in a safe way- the museum was closed until further notice the second Boxten's ichor eye showed itself so his ego isn't COMPLETELY shattered by judgemental stares, like, only 2 people give him 'the look' (guess who) (Shrimpo and Toodles don't count cuz Shrimpos always a bitch and Toodles is more concerned, and she doesn't know how to express it in a way that's not staring) so he's still stable enough to not go crazy uhh details below the cut tw for sh and (self)cannibalism

I just realised a LOT of lore below the cut

!!!!! hey ppl who care about this au theres a mini timeline for glisten/kinda boxten too below !!!!!! moving on

Order of events- things in brackets are things semi-related but more for figuring out timings (insert Glitterbox pre-twist timeline) -Glisten would've been attacked and killed by Boxten, but instinctually punched him in his sleep, saving himself but beginning Boxten's twist in the process -Gardenview closes until further notice -Glitterbox takes a break from each other, reconnected by Glisten soon after -(Boxten's ichor grows to cover half his face) -(Boxten rips Poppy's eyelashes out) -Boxten is left alone with Glisten for no time at all and manages to shatter part of his face before anyone else enters, and Glisten, unlike the first time, doesn't defend himself as he was conscious and procrastinated -Glitterbox takes a break from each other -(Boxten rips his key out) -Glisten tweaks the fuck out over his appearance and shatters his own face 10x more than before, exposing 1 ☝️ ichor eye -Glitterbox regroups with much reassuring, from Glisten, that he forgives Boxten -Boxten fucking dies [fully twists] -Glisten tweaks out once again and this time rips his stomach open very brutally, screaming and kicking the whole time, and when people came panicked to help him, which worked last time, he just moved to ripping his sleeves, scratching his arms, and scooping his ichory 'guts' in the break in his face [it felt like eating to him at the time] and more eyes began forming until he was knocked to sleep by his handler -(Boxten's handler dies to his toon as witnessed by Poppy's handler, says false goodbyes and love yous to a hallucination and dies content) -???

Why is he still an ichory mess? Wherever the ichor still shows up is permanent and stained into him unless it were to be bleached, and he refuses to let anyone change his shirt (he let his leggings and leg warmers get changed despite them being only dirty and not damaged + a more sensitive area on his body) Why wont he let anyone change his shirt? Boxten laid on it in the last cuddle they had before he became a creature beyond comprehension, and he doesn't wanna risk forgetting the metaphorical (memories they made) so he keeps the physical (shirt) as a back up Why are his hands tied? So he doesn't try that whole eating himself shit again, tied by his handler, told by his handler, dw Glisten doesn't mind, actively the opposite, he's comforted by it (both the knowledge he's stopped from injuring himself/others and the idea his handler cares about him enough, still, after he's become this thing, to not let him be hurt) And as a little nerd wanting-outfits-to-make-sense bonus, the extra ribbon spindly things normally tied as an extra under his normal bow are the ones now tied around his arms!!!!! When the hellfire happened he had his bows taken off so they're still clean

yapsesh over

[ranfordgallus]

I have...a guilt thats been on my mind for months now and i have to spill it all out so i could finally feel some peace maybe...this is also kind of a vent so..yk

...FUCK, i feel so embarrassed and...a bit ashamed, 1 year ago i got this...HUUUGGGEEE hatred for proshippers, nd i mean...not tht i feel sympathetic for them i still do not fuck with those weirdos and im a weirdo myself so thats sayin something...but that hatred boiled over me so much i started harassing them alot and tell my insta followers to report them..i mean..i dont...exactly feel bad for that but i do feel bad for not minding my own business

Instead of me being calm and..yk just block the person while having a stink face, i just got too angry and just sent threats to them, majority of proshippers that ive met are usually young people who are influenced by..yk the internet of those who do these stuff as a coping mechanism (though, i dont think its a good way to cope and justifying it as a coping mechanism doesnt excuse or make you free of consequence or judgement, i feel like proshipping makes your mental health worse as people hate on you and..idk i feel like romanticizing trauma isnt healthy in general..anyway back on topic) and...i just.. don't get it, or didnt get it

Now ive changed and, i still hate darkshippers and proshippers they can go fuck themselves honestly, if they get hated I wouldn't care less because its your own consequences for posting that shit in public instead of keeping it to yourself, in private...but i still feel guilty for sending threats instead of trying to be calm, understanding what they're going through, and talk through it when they have a conversation with me (only applies to people who use it as a coping mechanism or is a young person, because people who do this for fun isnt worth talking through)

This hatred back then was a cause from my own experience, how proshippers influenced my mind and..led to me making terrible decisions and thoughts that costed my mental health, granted i was too young to be in the internet but still.. i still feel guilt for harassing them instead just blocking their asses, could've saved so much stress to me

And have been feeling this guilt and embarrassment for a year not knowing how to get it out and be honest, but here i m typing it out..and i feel alot better now that i finally released this feeling in me thats been building up so much

Edit: ykw i do feel bad actually for the proshippers that i harassed that never came up to me and sent people to report them, i was too angry to care but the more i change the more i felt really bad for them, i really shouldnt use my following to attack other people, that was really immature of me honestly

[lyinginthesnow]

just finished the bear and i wanna talk about sydneyyyyy. specifically her fear of her own naivete. it’s like. she needs to believe in herself to stay motivated, but she’s constantly aware that if she fails, that ambition will be viewed as foolishness like it did with her catering company. her strengths (thinking outside the box, willingness to take risks, commitment to her goals) are double edged. maybe she has what it takes to make it, or maybe she’s got herself in too deep with something that was doomed to fail from the start.

but this insecurity around her potential naïveté doesn’t work great for her when it comes to being taken seriously, i.e. .. perceived as not naive. she closely monitors everything, including her partnership with carmy — did she make the wrong choice in a business partner? she’s paranoid that everything that goes wrong is proof of her poor judgement. but carmy, far more secure in his position, does not have the same anxieties about syd in return. so when her fear is expressed, she comes off as overly anxious and nitpicky, which can lead to her being dismissed. the scene where she confronts carmy for not telling her they’re knocking down the walls is a good example. he responds sarcastically, downplaying the issue, as though she has unreasonable expectations of him. (“What? Sorry. You would have preferred that we…?”). to save face, sydney opts to match his tone. but this ultimately undermines her position because, though carmy does eventually concede and apologize, the confrontation has gone from a genuine expression of concern to an exciting drama, as richie points out by going “ooooohhh!”. carmy may have lost the argument but he won the room, because sydney, by retreating from authenticity to flippant banter to be taken seriously, trivialized her own position.

god she’s such an interesting character to me. her fear of being naive, or perceived as naive, often leads to that very outcome. she second guesses everything to the point of having expectations that other people deem unreasonable. she bites off more than she can chew, and then, embarrassingly, she has to spit it back out. yk. and this is not to say her concerns are invalid (her frustration w carmy is warranted), only to say that her neuroses in this area feed into her mounting doubts, and the way she expresses them, in a sort of feedback loop, and this increases more and more as the stakes rise. there is no way to hold back, or hesitate. she needs to commit to giving the bear everything she has. but what if that commitment is just recklessness? what if that risk tasking is just foolish? if she truly is being naive, how can she know that? the harder she commits to her goals, the deeper her fear, the deeper her need to commit to something…… anyway.

[librarycards]

I annotate because I know I am many people, and that I’ll keep iterating forever, even after I die, because new readers and interlocutors will continue contacting various versions of me and passing their own judgements. For as long as I’m known, I’ll keep multiplying. Annotations are a way of engaging myselves in conversation. Sometimes, annotations are my way of fighting with other me’s for the last word. It’s a relentless, fast-paced, exciting form of relentless self-critique that leaves me flushed and invigorated. I enjoy making it visible to others in the works I do publish, just like I like those YK computers that were translucent, and you could see “under the hood” and even (gasp) repair them yourself! Maybe this offering will allow readers to understand me better, or at least, think that they do. Maybe (hopefully) it will allow them to do the same with their own writing, whether by giving permission or just providing an example.

[sarah] Cavar, interviewed by Katharine Blair for Pressed into Ink.

[someonebeatyoutothisuser]

GingerBrave hcs because I'm going insane and I can no longer contain the silliness. (Idk how to do this so don't hate me pls)

GingerBrave is a people pleaser. He wants to go around and try to make everyone happy even if it isn't possible.

He also likes really bright things like things that are so bright and colorful you couldn't even see it without having to shield your eyes.

Thanks to being without food for unreasonable amounts of time he has an eating disorder.

He loves to fit in tiny places. Like boxes and stuff. He finds them comfy.

He actually still has trust issues because of his childhood and stuff but he keeps forgiving others because everyone deserves a second chance. Even though it is to hide his monophobia

He loves video games but his favorite one is Mario party. Specifically super Mario party

Luigi is GingerBrave's favorite Mario character. Like he likes him so much he'd pick him for anything. And he has all of his games

Although most cookies in the witches castle are ageless for their own reasons GingerBrave is the only ageless person who was made by the shadow witch. The only reason he was ageless was because she apparently dropped a crystal in his dough

Whenever GingerBrave feels bad or as if he did something wrong he would make that one face in spongebob (hopefully yk which one)

GingerBrave can literally be a child genius then the next second he is a complete dumbass

His VA is Bradley Pierce yes I mean tails sonic boom VA (I'm aware he already has one but he is a stinky poo poo man)

GingerBrave is completely insecure of the scars he got from battle because he believes he got them from "recklessness"

GingerBrave loves cosplaying his favorite is being magical boy cosplays or basically making a male version of magical girl cosplays.

GingerBrave hates baking. Like he hates it with a passion because it reminds him of the shadow witch but he loves cooking.

GingerBrave can actually hear footsteps from miles away from him even if they're quiet.

GingerBrave likes going to the dark cacao kingdom for the holidays.

GingerBrave watches a lot of power puff girls and total drama.

GingerBrave is constantly scared that his friends would abandon him when given the chance a lot. Even when he is reassured.

After what happened on day four of cookie Odyssey GingerBrave made a promise to never tell anyone anything ever again. He fears it could get anyone hurt.

And despite it being clotted's own fault GingerBrave still blames himself for day four his excuse being that if he didn't tell clotted the truth it wouldn't have happened

GingerBrave is trans-male his dead name is gingerly cookie. The only people who know this are GingerBright, skater, wizard, zombie, strawberry, hero cookie and GingerDozer.

GingerBrave is the youngest of all of his siblings. And he hates being teased for it.

When GingerBrave is confronted by fear like actual fear you can tell by the way he violently shakes. But people rarely know that he does this.

GingerBrave's love language is reassurance.

GingerBrave carries around a yellow backpack. It was a gift from GingerDozer.

GingerBrave's favorite song is actually Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez.

GingerBrave actually has a huge sweet tooth that he hides.

GingerBrave fears judgement. This fear encourages him to do his best so people's high expectations are met.

GingerBrave loves squishmellows. Especially the big ones.

GingerBrave actually uses emoticons over emojis because he thinks they're cuter.

GingerBrave would only wear his frog costume during the spring time

His favorite color is parakeet. He likes to specifically use the shade because he thinks its normal

GingerDozer actually gave GingerBrave the "Brave" part for his fearless stunts

GingerBrave owns a tank. A tank made out of cardboard.

Sorry If it's too long I was too excited. :(

[d1s1ntegrated]

okay guys so. here's some updates!

-my grandma died. (not sigma.)

-i got the infinite hours glitch at work (im working sm now)

-i'm broke af still cause i honestly genuinely truthfully laurv grocery shopping too much (the horrors of the economy are incomprehensible)

-i love homicipher!!!!!!!!!!!!!

anyways. that's basically it. i'm trying to get back in here cause i feel so bad for all the unanswered prompts and asks in my inbox. i know i kinda flopped. im doing my best!!

also small announcement below the cut!!! especially considering ive been experimenting more with dead dove/nonconventional topics and themes.

first thing; i made a side blog for my dead dove and other extreme fics. the reason why i'm doing this is bc some people don't want to see that kind of stuff- and that's totally okay! and ik the filtering/blocking tags thing doesn't always work, especially for more "niche" topics.

i plan on branching out my repertoire by writing about topics that are "scary" or "new" to me- so this little counterpart to my blog will make it easier for me to post things that aren't typically sought after by the gen. pop. things like sickfics, whump, noncon, and other graphic or heavy themes.

in addition/addendum to that:

idk if this is common knowledge for any of my followers, moots, etc, but i have a severe phobia of vomit. like. huge. and at my big ass age of 21 (lol) i think it's time to start...getting through that fear. i've struggled with contamination OCD for a really long time and it's something i never thought id even try to overcome- but then i came across a creator on here who makes fetish art- which def wasn't something i was looking to encounter. but like a car crash, i couldn't stop looking at their work and i ended up coming across a post of theirs where they explain that they do what they do to get over their fear. at first i was fucking baffled as to how they couldn't manage to do that, but i get it now. taking something innately fucking horrifying and flipping the narrative so casually can be cathartic, and i finally after over a year of contemplation, gave it a whirl in my own writing. i mean, what better way to get over something by attacking it from my best angle??

typically this isn't something i'd ever consider doing. but...here we are. and i feel like im doing myself, and other people who feel the same way, a disservice by hiding this type of content in my notes app, never to be seen by anyone but me.

my blog has always been a safe space for the freaks and weirdos, and i want to keep facilitating that space while also keeping it enjoyable for all crowds. so by keeping a little separation between the two blogs, it'll ensure i feel comfortable, and others do too. i'm not gonna force everyone who follows me to come across some crazy fetish content they didn't sign up for, especially when previously i'd stated i don't write that kind of stuff. but alas people change and grow and i don't want to stifle myself from writing good things because im too afraid of judgement or my own insecurities.

i think kink is a very important thing in the fanfic world, because it allows the writer, as well as the audience, to connect on an even further level through the delivery of fetish content. as someone who hyperfixates on the development and accumulation of fetish and kinks, especially from a psychological level, this is something i was considering in the past- but not to this level, yk? like yeah, i could continue to just write sweet little hcs of softgaraki, and i love doing that, but also...like, i need these freak ass men to live their truths, and i need to live mine.

with that all being said, @compendiumofdecay is where these nasty fics will be for any and all who are interested.

[jokeson-u]

okay heres the course of my full thoughts on the natvan friendship.

lets start with elementary. i dont think either of them were sent to pre-k or daycare. they were less socialized as kids than some of their peers (def not all. they arent the only lower class families in wiskayok.) i think they were buddies as kids, and played at recces and stuff.

most kids didnt wanna play w nat bc her clothes didnt smell very good and found her kind of offputting bc she was pretty quiet (the way children of abusive or neglectful parents often are). i think by the time 2nd/3rd grade rolled around most kids kinda picked up on the judgement from their own parents, which carries over for kids in their own interactions.

i think it was kinda similar for van. she wore the same striped shirt and khaki shorts almost everyday and her hair used to be realllly long as a kid bc her mom didnt get it cut often. kids found her long har cool at first and called her rapunzel, but got over it pretty quick when they realized van didnt like people braiding it and putting flowers in her hair. she was friendlier tho, and it took her a little longer than natalie to realize why she was treated differently. basically, van got used to hearing 'no' when she asked if people wanted to play with her or be her friend, but she didnt stop asking, whereas natalie stopped very quickly as she was often avoided.

van and nat became friends cus they were two of the only kids who consistently played with each other and would sit next to one another in circles and stuff. they ate lunch together, and that dynamic carried over to middle school.

when midle school starts, van gets a hair cut, and she and nat both wear fresher clothes and what not, but their reputations are already solidified. some people are nicer to van bc shes so social and makes some more friends. its not like she and nat have a friendship much deeper than elementary school bonds, but they still sit together at lunch and in classes they have.

idk when i think taissa comes into the picture, but ive always imagined taivan having a friends to pining to lovers relationship. so i think some point, maybe 6th or 7th grade, van meets tai at soccer club and is smitten. tai lowkey is too and van feels really welcomed by her and they connect. van start spending a little less time w nat bc she wants to be w tai. its not intentional at all. yk how first crushes are, especially a sapphic one, AND in middle school.

seats are assigned after first pickings so van and nat still sit together and have a decent rapport, but nat does have her lil 12 y/o feelings kind of hurt by van spending more time w tai than her. shes always one to pretend she doesnt care tho, so as time goes on, nat never speaks up about it. she kinda lets her and van remain how they are, and allows the distance to grow.

van never stops caring about nat, its just that shes a little older now and is becoming friends with new people. in her mind, nats always her buddy, she just has different relationships now.

nat becomes kinda friends w kevyn around this time. he wasnt a dick to her in elementary, and played w her sometimes when van wasnt around. they get closer, and his friends are cool w nat too. nat and van are still absolutely cool w each other, they just dont talk as much.

all this establishes itself more in 8th grade, but as van is a little older and reflects a bit, she decides to reach out to nat more. shits not great at home for nat, shes more jaded, but she considers it when van asks her to join the soccer club. kevyn convinces her to do it, so she does. van is hyped, other girls in the club arent so much. nat sticks with it despite that because she does actually really enjoy playing soccer, but it takes some more convincing to get her to try out for the actual team once they enter high school. van says she'll probably be the only one from the club who drops soccer, and itll show that they all got to her. it resonates w nat and she decided to join the team and try not to let it seem like she gave a shit.

nat ends up kinda getting along w some members and being on the team gets a bit easier. vans enthusiasm made more people less openly cruel to her. lottie never talked shit about anyone who didnt deserve it, and they ended up getting along in a way they didnt expect (ill be making a detailed post at some point about my insight on lottienats friendship). shauna and nat vibe when jackie isnt around, and sometimes taissa takes it easier on her cus she respects that van liked nat as kids. still, nats not necessarily close to any of them, but she does have some people on the team shes cool w.

around the middle of sophmore year, tai and van realize they feel the same and date on the dl. again, high school relationship, its pretty immature, so van feels like it isnt her place anymore to tell taissa to stop when shes rude to nat (i have the 'bong to hit/dick to suck' scene in mind as van was the only one to not react). obviously she says something when other people cross a line, as seen w travis. nat doesnt mind, she kinda would rather taissa be honest than pretend to like her. it doesnt rly affect anything in the team, nat didnt talk to any of them much more than necessary from the get go. shes less hurt about it than she was in middle school, and shes already picked up on taivan being a thing, so shes chill. shes gotten closer w kevyn so she feels pretty good about things.

at the beginning of junior year, (maybe the end of sophmore year idk i cant decide,) the incident with natalies dad happens. nat doesnt show for a couple weeks, and van tries to ask kevyn what happened. no one really knows the full story, but lots of rumors go around once the news of mr. scatorccio dying by a self inflicted gunshot wound to the head got out. van didnt rly pay mind to them, and became more outspoken w tai about not contributing to rumors.

when nat returns, she doesnt go to soccer for a bit. she and kevyn mostly skip, and kevyns friend started bringing them weed to help nat out. she smoked a bit before, but it becomes a regular thing. same w drinking. she had access to it as a kid and would take swigs. her father sometimes even let her get tipsy when she was a preteen. but after his death, it becomes more of a crutch. all his alcohol is lying around, so she provides the drinks to their skip sessions.

when nat decides its time to act unbothered, she comes back to soccer. shes still, understandably, traumatized, so she zones out even more and talks even less. but shes there. everyone is either extra nice to her, or gives her total space. van just tries to be casual, which nat appreciates.

by the half way point of junior year, nats pretty heavily into drinking and weed and psychedelics, and its at this point it affects her day to day. skipping is a daily occurance, she barely keeps her grades up to stay on the team. van tries to let nat know shes still a friend, but it upsets her to see nat showing up drunk. it reminds her of her mother. and van.. just cant deal w that. shes struggled so much with having a neglectful parent due to alcohol. shes tried her hardest to not let the world get to her like her mother did, and avoid falling down that path. watching it happen to natalie is just disappointing for van.

this isnt to say van doesnt drink and smoke. she def does, she likes to let loose, but i see her as a strictly social smoker/drinker. nat obviously has a diff relationship with drugs and alcohol, and the her reliance is something that rubs van the wrong way for personal, but also caring reasons.

its a combination of nat distancing herself naturally bc of her subtance abuse, and van realizing she cant fix it + having her opinion on nat change a bit. she cares for natalie. she has for a long time, even if its not the same as with more day to day friends. but she decides that theyre older now, nats made her choices and van doesnt agree with them, as much as she understands them.

theyre friendly. but vans self preserverance, tai supporting her protecting herself, and her sometimes seeing nat ending up like her own mother, the distance grows on both sides. nat doesnt even really pick up on it. shes pretty clouded for the last two years of high school, and she doesnt care. she has her vices and she has kevyn and she convinces herself thats enough.

i think maybe a part of nat is bitter that she feels things worked out so much better for van than her. its not entirely true but i mean.. kinda? at the same time, i think nat just sort of feels that way towards everyone and the entire universe.

its just all a cycle imo. they got close bc of their similar family dynamics, but those dynamics are what made them into the separate people they are. theyre no longer aligned bc they took different paths based on the cards they were dealt. nat became her parents in a way, and van did her best not to, and to not let anymore of that into her life.

then the crash happens, and none of it matters anymore.

tldr; van and nat got along as little kids bc they were treated differently. their friendship never developed past elementary school level bonds, and they drifted apart naturally due to different social circles and life choices

[kybelles]

for the choose violence ask game: 10, 16, 18!

HELLO BABY!!! sorry in advance since this is all about DAMEN DAMEN and DAMEN cause duh... ik it's not a trendy expression anymore but he really does live rent free in my head 💔

10. worst part of fanon

OH DEAR..... yk i'm trying really hard to not sound deranged and delusional but i feel like there are so many skewed interpretations of damen even though the books are literally from his pov. here are some of them:

a. "damen is an unreliable narrator" i've literally gone to battle with people over this take cause NO HE'S FUCKING NOT?? you say 'damen didn't see laurent's good qualities and was overly judgemental of veretians' i say damen not fucking with his captors who's been nothing but awful to him doesn't mean he was unreliable!! it wasn't like laurent was a golden angel and damen willingly hated on him for nothing. book 1 laurent treated him horribly and damen had every reason and right to not trust him or find him honorable.

b. "damen was a fuckboy who discarded the people he slept with the second he was done with them before laurent" breaking news: if someone sleeps with a lot of people that means he has no respect for them and is bound to treat them like shit! the lack of canon evindence doesn't matter!

(if the take is about damen not being in love with his partners before laurent then i'm on board!! it's the implication that damen was an inconsiderate sex partner that boggles my mind cause... did we read the same books?)

c. "damen is actually bad at sex" is a take/joke(?) i've seen MULTIPLE times and it never fails to make me think what a fucking stupid thing it is to say ❤️

d. "damen learned empathy from laurent" ????? lmao. anyways...

e. "damen was lazy and kastor picked up his slack" is everything ok with your eyes? when's the last time you've seen an ophthalmologist?

f. "theomedes neglected damen" damen literally spends page after page reminiscing about his father's words, advices and their last days together. he also says theo was the only parent he knew all his life and since someone needed to raise him to be this fascinating gentle giant... 1+1=3???

g. any interpretation where damen is some sort of neanderthal who is a selfish spoiled and clueless oaf who needs to be educated by girlypopboss laurent OR where he lets laurent walk all over him and has no agenda of his own. just... no.

16. you can't understand why so many people like this thing

any setting where laurent is downright cold and rude towards damen FOR NO APPARENT REASON and yet damen is still obsessed with him, again for some mysterious reason??? not to sound like some know-it-all condescending bitch (tho i suspect to some degree i'm already infamous and some ppl dislike me bc of it 🥺 oh well...) but i think most people forget damen only started giving laurent the time of his day once laurent started showing him basic deceny during pg. i really don't think he'd be interested in someone who rebuked him at every chance and showed no interest at him.

(some ppl give jokaste as an example to excuse this but damen only says jokaste wasn't easily courted aka she didn't immediately jump into his bed (which is admirable omg... i wouldn't be as strong...) he never said she aloof towards him)

18.it's absolutely criminal that the fandom has been sleeping on...

THE FACT DAMEN IS A HUGE NERD!!! seriously, who listens to FOUR HOURS of poetry in one sitting... we all tend to focus on his martial insterests but ik my boy is also a sophisticated man 💅