#wow that was a lot of text sorry
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What kind of view does Rynn have of some of the big events that happen, like the clone wars or death star destruction, or the key factors and characters, like Luke, Leia, or the rebellion in general?
As with everything Rynn, one has to remember she is not some hero or important person or even well informed - This is pretty key to her whole character - So we'll need to exercise some critical thought. 1. The Clone Wars: Rynn was very young during the "liberation" of Ryloth and the battles fought there, but for obvious reasons such a traumatic time will leave scars in a child. Her mother fought and died with the resistance and she famously harbours a deep mistrust and dislike for droids. (a distrust most of the outer and mid rim canonically shared before 2012)
2. Murderball: So in Rynn's Timeline the Death Star has not yet been destroyed if I recall correctly, about 4BBY. But when it does occur it's good to keep in mind the Death Star is secret until the destruction of Alderaan and is destroyed itself just days later, well before any public news network has even figured out that the empire was responsible. It would take a long time for anyone not directly involved with the rebellion to know about its destruction, and further still to grasp the significance of the event. Much of the information would likely also either be republic or imperial propaganda, or be suspected of being rebel propaganda. Rynn's opinion would probably be to shake her head or express disbelief at casualty estimates like you might react to a tv broadcast about a war or disaster in a distant country, and then go back to work because she has to eat.
3. She's heard of Han, because they move in similar, gossipy circles, but otherwise the characters would all be unknown to her until probably around the establishment of the new Republic. She'd be surprised people that 'common' and from the outer rim too were important leaders of the Rebellion, maybe a little proud because she's acquainted with Han, spacers represent, but ultimately again, it's far away and rent is due...
4. The Rebellion: The Rebellion is primarily trouble to Rynn, their presence in a system makes her life harder on a good day, their existence at ALL makes everyone's life harder. She understands and respects their creed but doesn't trust the purity of their motives and do not think they'll win. Plus they are underfunded and desperate - tried to cheat her out of a deal once and nearly blew her ship so she does not work with them anymore. Once they actually win, she will be on edge and very curious. It takes a long time for change to reach the Outer Rim but those days will be dangerous and exciting. The market prices will be crazy weird for months if not years, how will fuel be affected? Will they forgive loans to imperial banks? (no) Plenty of ways in those heady days for a clever spacer to get rich or die stupidly...
She just wants to get on with work.
#wow that was a lot of text sorry#Rynn#my art#.txt#asks#being a working nobody is important to what makes rynn rynn#I'm not interested in the disney universe where every single person who does anything is related and it's an oligarchy of agency#nor one of moral absolutes and complete lack of consequence#Tell me about the small people
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Unpopular almost blasphemous labru opinion time: kabru would so be into getting flavour profiled actually hed be like. Oh citrus notes interesting. And then he'd have a small crisis about not being able to do the same for Laios BUT he can tell him how quickly he would die if he stabbed him in whatever part he's kissing and that's just as sexy
#labru#nsft text#so much fanfic in which laios is like 'oh you taste almost like..' and kabru is like NO and im sorry esteemed scholars i gotta disagree#its an interesting thing to know!#now if you dont want to go to the trouble of describing taste because its a pain in the ass i respect that#wow but ive been talking a lot about laios eating kabru out lately. it has been a very dry pride month over here what can i say#kabru *sucking a mark into laios' tigh* and you see youd think this is safe but actually an important artery passes here#*resting his ear on the spot* i can even hear your heartbeat!!! *big smile* you'd bleed out in ten minutes#laios *harder than hes ever been in his life* what if. what if you stabbed my dick#kabru *still smiling* not yet#laios: PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEPLEASEPLEASEE
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OHOHOHO. Mike! 4, 5, 2, 9
2. What is this character's favorite color?
I think he really likes blue. All of the outfits I draw him in are primarily blue (and cream white), regardless of the hue or tint.
4. What is this character's hobby?
Canonly he enjoys kickboxing. I think he's picked up an assortment of little things he likes to do. Focused his efforts in many things instead of one specific one. He likes gymnastics (think he's 2nd best at it, behind Svetlana) and his audition tape leads me to think he likes ballet too. He likes very physical / active stuff basically. I want to say he's good at playing some kind of instrument too but that's a whole different world (knows nothing about band). When you have a lot of free time at home, you learn to use it.
5. What is something I wished happened in canon to this character.
I wish he didn't make All Stars finalist (if that counts). It should've been Mal and Zoey the whole way through. I wish the reset button thing never happened either. Also, I wish him being in juvie was expanded on some. Most of the things are issues I have with the All Stars writing... I just want him happy. Him being a canon system drives me insane because there is so much bad stuff implied there (Vito... Mal...) someone get him out the house and get him some baked goods and a nice kiss on the mouth.
9. What is my platonic OTP for this character?
I have sooo many -> Mike/Zoey (in my brain she's a lesbian with comphet... realizes it during ROTI and they just stay friends)... Mike/Duncan (juvie buddies who know a little too much about the other's childhood), Mike/Cameron (Cameron knowing Mike was a system super early on... knowing all his ticks and stuff). Also a big fan of fanfictions where Mike and Anne Marie are friends after ROTI. I'm a shipper but friendships are super important to me too.
#not art#td mike#asks#wow this was a lot ! sorry for the big wall of text. i dont play about mike total drama
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traditional pencil art is the only form of art that won't have you ripping your hair out trying to make colors interesting in any way. how pure is that
#text#pencils...so pure and innocent....like..like t*****#i'm at the point with my art where i don't need any outside input or editing to get the colors where i want them to be usually -#- but sometimes it still makes me so mad bcos the color pilled tryhard vibe is ingrained into my subconscious#the only way to get “Good” at colors is to be a tryhard and try really hard#being good with colors is literally a nonexistent cloutchaser concept tho .. i lol'd#i say 'i think' a LOT but i rly think that by good colors people usually mean attention grabbing#but isn't that the point ...? (< my good twin talking to me from the mirror)#no...#like wat colors will make random people go 'wow' most which isn't even alldat esoteric-thinking#i'm always artsy elite pilling#i also want to put all people that pair their OCs with t*ldryn sero or just really want him in a battle Royale#and the person that wins gets euthanized#not related#idk... annyway... putting art online ...(chewing) (chewing)that means i'm pondering#there's a lot of love put into my art done with pencils than there is in my digital work#which is flaunty#hmph#all i need in this world to survive is to talk about art in a broad sense as a person that only draws sk*rim twink on ossan action -#- and to talk about the psychology of that twink and ossan. and those 4 who are in civil warfare#other people from that winterland wonder .. idk#Vapid!#the only thing stopping me from entering the 'Twitter artist' mindspace is not adding any recycled filters and overstimulating editing on -#- my spawn#sorry i'm mad cause i sensed the Twitter artist mindspace in me like it was a demon last night while drawing
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finally some good fucking representation for the people who process grief by snarling "DON'T TOUCH ME LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE" at all their loved ones and then within 60 minutes break down sobbing on the exact same loved ones like "i'm sorry i love you i don't know what's wrong with me i don't know what to do i am trying SO HARD,"
#not that i would know anything about that. i just think it's probably an underrepresented demographic. for reasons#characterization and arcs that are so fucking dynamic and good i just#i legitimately don't think i've ever consumed a story that shows so many different messy grieving processes so complexly and kindly#and i have consumed a LOT of very very very good stories about grief. u could say that shit is in my wheelhouse.#wow. chews off my own hands#failing not to spam text posts sorry everyone. i just. ive got at least 250 more things to say#toh#toh spoilers#hunter toh
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slams hand down do it you know you want to do it,,, sugar daddy au and now its just awkward as fuck but they get to Deal with It. bonus points for people laughing at them in the background. i am your inner demon whispering that this is a good idea and you should absolutely write it (no pressure ofc!!! take your time and its fine if you want to!!!)
for ship names. yeah very sad. i havent settled on like. a combination of their names that sound appealing to me so im just. sitting there awkwardly in Yun Taeheon x Shin Junseo. simple but it works. ill bonk my brain for ideas later,, i have cut down on thigns i need to hand in tomorrow im procrastinating because the thing i need to do is so horribly boring
maybe the korean side of the fandom has something going on but that would require me to go on twitter and figure out what korean words to put in the search box and I'm already failing at "go on twitter".
sdkhldfkhg the inner demons are winning. now I'm kinda contemplating how this would even start, which made me realize we know fuck all about Shin Junseo's past??? We only knew that apparently he had a shitty job before he awakened and didn't have any friends and seemingly also has no family.
So like? Local man signs up on an app bc honestly at this point being a sugar baby would not be worse than another horrible shift at whatever minimum wage job he has to pay the bills?
And cool, he hits it off with Yun Taeheon, something something business man. It's a lot less hollywood-pretty-woman than he expected, more nice dinners with genuinely entertaining discussions, and sure getting laid is nice too, and then, well, the world goes to shit for a hot second and well, the contract written before runs out, isn't renewed and Shin Junseo has a moment between picking up a shitty job again and awakening where he comfortably lives on his savings while his,,, ex? well, no, ex would be implying they dated. boss is also not quite the term, his previous situationship, made himself a guild master.
whatever.
and then the world goes even more to shit and he drags corpses and the memories of a world annihilated out of a dungeon. He makes his plan, keeps his head down and then fucking Yun Taeheon is standing in front of him again.
#ask#anon#weapon creator#btw i need you to know that i think YTH would be the one who is most awkward about it#like oh no that's the guy he was paying to spend time with bc he's a loser who can't find someone he'd like to date like a normal person#side note: i think yth is the kinda guy who'd text you at 1am like 'what flowers do i bring to meet your mom for the 1st time'#and while i think sjs was 100% telling himself all the time this is Just Business given how apparently starved for human connections he was#yth was probably genuinely going 'should i talk about just. being in a relationship with him?????' a couple months in#step 1 of being a sugar daddy FAILED#ANYWAY and he probably thinks 'okay i can play this cool'#and then sjs takes a look at the first contract he drew up#and says sth like 'oh wow you'd pay me more now' and yth would simply perish#sjs meanwhile is just awkward bc he suddenly has a lot more 'power' and is specifically wanted#god im so obsessed with how the only thing sjs wanted was to be useful and a friend#insane trauma to toss into the start of a story#dlfghdlfjkh anyway i am so sorry im just rambling
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Weird having an actual favorite band and knowing it. I don't really have many favorites it is hard to understand my feelings and even harder to pinpoint a 'better and more' feeling about one specific thing. But I know all of their songs, I listen to them all in a big playlist and never get bored, I am always happy to hear any song by them, I have every song's lyrics memorized, like ... they are my unequivocal favorite. There is nothing like it. Yes, I can get really into other songs, there are probably singular songs I can say I like more than any one song by this band. But I guess having a favorite is like what people say about getting married. I'm not explaining myself on that one actually I do have a point there that's an actual metaphor but I've decided explaining it is a bad use of my time. It's one of those artists that are popular enough and artsy enough that they can crop up as fic titles occasionally and no matter the lyric or song it comes from I can always tell immediately. I don't remember what the point of this post was I'm deep in my panic phase and it's 4 am and I was just sitting there singing I Have Made Mistakes to myself bc I can just do that, the whole song, and because it is very funny to go I have made mistakes I have made mistakes and I will continue to make them while in the middle of freaking the fuck out about existing or something. Bc you know yeah im one spoon away from setting the ends of my hair in fire because if I'm kindling for a little while at least I'll feel of use ????????? Yeah this post for sure had a point and it's devolved.
#tide of consciousness#Sorry that's a lot of text wow#Can we talk about the existential panic. I've been dying to talk about the existential panic#<- doesn't talk about it#Does anyone else get this. The feeling that is like the world is ending and its drowning and burning and it burns and nothing will ever beo#My best guess is I just have anxiety but it is very hard to believe that bc it feels so all consuming and terrifying and so so so much so m#The worst part is I'm not actually even feeling it I'm just sitting here using words that I know describe it bc it's like it just#Is happening. Behind a wall. And I'm here feeling the heat on the doorknob#Translating between the space where the feeling exists and the space where I reside#At some point I just go oh. I've been experiencing the world-ending terror for hours now#Like reading a letter!!!!!!!!! I just get a letter from my brain that goes 'emotions report. It all burned down years ago'#It's like and I know if I was in it I'd be crying and shaking and despairing so deeply and throwing myself around the room#And I feel like this EVERY OTHER DAY. Which is obviously why I apparently partitioned myself away from the feeling#Because you literally just you can't function with that#But surprise it's still there actually and I'm still having 2 breakdowns minimum a week#But now it looks like I'm normal and functioning to everyone else#So I seem like a horrible lazy fucking asshole who doesn't do anything but sit around accomplishing maybe 3? 4? Total minor tasks per day#Because I can't HANDLE ANYTHING ELSE !!!#HOW THE FUCK DO YOU FIX THIS#This is for sure something I shouldn't post but you know that's a rational thought for rational people
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#just need to vent rq lololol#my wedding lehenga came out so freaking beautiful#but it needs to be taken in a lot like. i lost 6 inches on my waist since i initially had it made for my body#and everyone at the shop was like ohh wow good job great you look so great now you look awesome#and my mom was like oh wow good job that’s good you did it#like lol#i wanted to just be like#‘thanks i had to go to iop therapy at an ed center where they literlaly taught me how to eat food. like a toddler. thanks’#like i didn’t lose weight for an intentional reason but thanks for confirming you thought i looked horrible before lolol#idk i have been like every size in the book but seeing how much better ppl treat me when im smaller#i’m just like. :)#if my mom says anything about her body or mine tomorrow i will probably fucking lose it and if you see a woman in nj killing ppl on the news#it’s me. lol#it just really took me out of the experience bc i’m trying sooooo hard to be neutral about my body. and like. i don’t need to hear your#thoughts abt what i look like lmao#whatever my dress is beautiful and i’m so beautiful and i’m excited but i really do think i should be able to hunt ppl for sport#leave me alone#nothing you do can please ppl#when i was 20 and 100 lbs and killing myself and sick and miserable every single day my mom was also just like#wow you look great#meanwhile i was balding and fainting at the gym and failing my college classes bc i was obsessed w my body#text#also look at these cats that are just in luis’s apartment’s hallway like rofl who let them out of their apt!!!! so cute#my mom saying ‘you did it’ as if i was trying to do something made me lol#i wasn’t TRYING to do anything i just am healing my relationship w food and my body#bc i refuse to waste my entire life being bitter and miserable and ashamed of existing#like SOMEONE i know….#anyway this could be you too! if you went to fucking therapy!#i ate ny pizza out of spite after all of this#sorry some of you can’t enjoy a fucking carb !!!!!
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I still think that frog days is like,the most perfect and best game of it's kind ever.
Period. It's got everything on my checklist for a perfect game.
It's literally SO GOOD. I love it SO much you guys! It's a point and click game.
Technically it was never finished,but it's like 99% completed it just doesn't have the full proper ending as far as I know,please go play it now. It's amazing, and the soundtrack is an absolute bop.
#text#I'm so crazy insane for this game it's like autism+nostalgia heaven for me. wow#you can REALLY tell a lot of passion and effort and soul was put into this game!!!#my ramblings#sorry I'm just so autistic about this game aughhh
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reading up on autism to figure out what the fuck is going on with me and making a list of personal pros and cons to figure out whether i should feel good or bad about it. as one does
pros: hyperlexia, deeply compassionate, talent for mathematics and the sciences/can do calculations of reasonable complexity in my head, visual hypersensitivity/decent artistic ability when replicating from still life/good at distinguishing subtle colors, acute hearing/good at identifying distinct sounds and sonic textures/deeply moved by music, can rotate some shapes in my head really fast i guess
cons: people can tell something is "off" about me in a fraction of a second and will be anywhere from begrudgingly polite to overtly hostile about it, terminal "not like other girls" disease/feeling of disconnect with existing in a feminine body, can pace for hours on end until my legs hurt, frequent crying & shutdowns, talk about myself and my interests extensively and can't seem to find a way to stop or better relate to others outside of mirroring them, productive work that actually *utilizes* my talents seems to only happen in increasingly infrequent bursts of hyperfocus, recurring identity issues stemming from a fundamental feeling of being born wrong and belonging nowhere, visceral hypersensitivity means i'm in pain from the normal functioning of my own organs for most of the day, people have compared me to sheldon cooper and elon musk, i am constantly begging for the sweet release of death,
#text#hmm. this post was funnier in my head#to be clear i am not one of those ''aut1sm is a superpower'' people and i'm aware that my ''gifts'' afford me significant privilege#but they also used to be things i liked about myself even when i was depressed#now that i'm anywhere from 3-5 yrs into burnout and can't rly *access* my gifts in the capacity i used to be able to anymore#it's rly hard to be positive about things. lol#i used to think that if people were going to think i was weird forever that i should at least be useful#which may not be possible to the degree it once was. and i realize was also a damaging and unhelpful mindset to begin with#tbh i'm rly jealous of the zoomers who seem to have more knowledge about/be more accepting of this stuff.#i think i was just in denial for years. but after looking into it more i'm more certain i'm aut1stic than i've been of anything in my life#which is significant considering the; yknow; identity issues. lol#it's kind of hilarious how many of my old text posts just scream ''undiagnosed aut1stic burnout'' in retrospect#sorry for all the behaviors and stuff. i love my mutuals but i think i have to be on this website less#while i figure my stuff out. i'll still check in but not as often#feel free to reach out in the meantime. i already miss a lot of my friends i lost contact with while going thru it <3#wow these tags got away from me. ok bye
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ive been tryinb to pinpoint exactly why i havent been writing as much recently and i might have an answer at last, but im not sure if its right or not. writing started as like, a kind of escape/way for me to process stuff, or get emotions out that i just wasnt able to put down any other way. i enjoyed creating shit cuz it meant it wasnt all stagnating in my head. but i guess now im not in a position where im very... in need of it. its been over 7 years since i started writing and i was in the middle of secondary school and my life blew ass. then i kept writing through college cuz it kept me cool. and then those 6 months of uni. and the year of figuring out what to do (no success there). and then my job. and now. im unemployable, being paid money by the dole cuz i cant work. and my chronic pain im just kind of handling i guess, and i have other stuff to work on (modding, and ive been hanging out with friends more), and i have a possibly negative coping mechanism which most know about but. well . but the point really is that im not... needing to write. im now writing for my own sort of enjoyment and its different. i write slower. i pick more holes in it. im not saying i WANT something to throw my whole world upside down to bring back my writing but. i feel it stagnating in me. i keep trying to finish wips and getting nowhere . i need something to push me in the right direction again . maybe i just need to read more.
#wow thats long#uh. anyway. sorry! yknow how it is. 3am and whatnot .#i just want that rush again. i want the words to come out of me like they should#but they wont. they get stuck between my teeth and i cant brush them out.#my brain moves on but my fingers wont even twitch.#its a lot. its a lot a lot.#is this a vent? a negative post? iunno. read my wall of text boy.
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OH she’s gonna make me cry. you know when someone’s nice to you/Normal to you and it reminds you how people were not always normal to you in the past. yea. that.
#i don’t want to tell her about my Trauma rn it seems like a lot. but. wow#when i woke up i texted her “hi sorry i fell asleep” and she responded “why are you sorry? “#…because i’d be guilted in the past for not saying goodnight.#god they were so mean to me sometimes. just… a little unforgiving#no room for error.#but she gives me room for error. and not even that#she just lets me Exist.
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Previous anon here! I totally understand what you mean i have the same issue with my own ocs. So can I ask who's your oldesr oc (you've had the longest) and who's your favorite and why? :3c I wanna hear about them but it's hard to think of specific questions! Sidenote, you inspired me to start reblogging things as inspo for my own ocs!
OH I feel you, I'm the exact same way about not knowing what to specifically ask about other people's OCs lmao it's so hard to think of good questions!
My oldest (current) OC is my ranger, Elyss!! I've been playing her for coming up on EIGHT YEARS, which is admittedly not actually as much as it sounds because the run schedules for all the campaigns I'm in tend to be pretty sparse, ahaha :') She is also still my favorite, my beloved girl... 🥺💕 That's at least partly because I've been playing her for so long and for awhile she was my only dnd character, so I've had a lot of opportunity to think about her and play her and get to know her as a character.
She's a water genasi who was born and raised in a land where genasi are essentially unheard of, so she's spent most of her life fairly rejected and lonely. She ended up (voluntarily) living alone in the woods for something close to ten years, and she has a very nature-inspired True Neutral philosophy, so when we started the campaign with the premise of 'an established group of adventures trying to stop A Bad Guy from Taking Over The World' I had to figure out why she would care about that, and one of the answers was 'well... she loves her friends,' which has informed SO much about everything about her ever since. On a practical level, it means I get to engage with the game even if Elyss wouldn't necessarily want to (eg if the paladin wants to do a dangerous stupid thing to save some villagers, I want to go with him to help keep him safe), but it's also made her really interesting and really emotionally rewarding to roleplay with. I'm fortunate in that all my fellow players in her campaign are amazing AND Elyss has meaningful relationships with most of their characters, so I've been able to explore her navigating those relationships and her own feelings... at the beginning of the campaign, she felt really strongly that her love for her companions was completely one-sided, so had a lot of Issues about needing to be unambiguously useful and never a liability to avoid rejection and losing her right to be a part of the group. Unfortunately the circumstances of this campaign have given her... really severe trust issues to the point of sometimes paralyzing paranoia, BUT she DOES now believe that (most of) her close friends actually care about her in return, so, that's something :') I guess tl;dr without explaining the entire campaign and her entire personal development, she just has a lot of complex feelings and life circumstances that are not only interesting to play and think about but that also just... make me wish for the best for her. She's had a really hard time, so it fills me with joy whenever she gets a little reprieve, I'm overwhelmed on her behalf when things are inevitably really bad for her again, and I'm deeply invested in her path toward hope and growth and a happier, more stable future 🥺💕
All that said, I've gotten to play her a lot less lately, and while she's still my favorite, the margin isn't as wide as it used to be, lol. But I dunno if I could put a finger on the definitive second favorite? It depends on who I've played and/or have been obsessing over the most recently I think, lol. Right at this second that feels like a tossup between Juniper, my druid, and Melliwyk, my wizard; I'm not gonna do another wall of text for each of them for this ask BUT-- June is basically the character archetype I have the softest spot for (sweetheart, awkward, big ol nerd) and I wanna kiss her and give her soup, and Mel is a DIFFERENT archetype I tend to be drawn to (mad science type friendly little wierdo) but she has also developed depth that I wasn't expecting and now I have a lot of Thoughts and Feelings about HER as well. Also, June gives me a good outlet for a lot of soft tenderness, Mel is a good outlet for me in real life being a big fuckin nerd, and Elyss is my single best outlet for just. really loving to be really good at DPS when I'm playing a game kjhkdfhjd
#Anonymous#I was gonna say 'honorable mention to' other characters who are also my next-favorite but then I realized I was gonna list. all of them#I AM JUST. LOV MY LITTLE GUYS VERY MUCH#ANYWAY thank you so much for asking!! I hope this isn't completely incomprehensible dfgkjhdgf#ALSO wow I love that I've got you OC insp tagging too!! :D it's fun it's nice I love going back through my insp tags sometimes#I was yelling about elyss today actually cause she and my husband's PC in the same campaign are both our favorite OCs#and they're best friends and they have had some similar feelings/ issues/ experiences#so sometimes we gotta just Holler about the campaign and The Problems It Keeps Doing To Us#it's been...... not great a lot of the time :') it's sort of put all the PCs through the wringer in mostly 'they're just damaged now' ways#but we love those guys so MUCH we're held together by that love and their love for each other and like.... spite fdgjhdf#anyway again thanks for asking!! sorry (or you're welcome?) for the wall of text#about me#my OCs#elyss#juniper#melliwyk
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Here's what the jokes say, for screenreaders:
Joke one: How do you make a watermelon laugh? You just give it a little 'squeeze'!
Joke two: Why did the orange go to school? To improve its juice-knowledge!
Joke four: I kept trying to figure out how to make the pun "sole man" work, but it just wasn't my forte.
Joke five: What do you call two thieves walking through a warehouse full of shoes? A HEELING PROCESS
Joke six: Why did the artist take up gardening? He wanted to brush up on his still-life skills.
Joke seven: Why are bicycles always so calm? Because they're always in a relaxed state of mind
Post script from image ID writer: I have never used a screenreader, so I don't know what extra bits I should add to make it clear what is happening. Improvement tips are appreciated.
so if you google "__ puns" you mostly get a bunch of AI websites as the top results, and i am kind of fascinated by them, because they read exactly like the kind of jokes little kids tell when they have recently learned about the concept of Humour but they're too young to understand why things are funny:
great job everyone let's hit the showers
#image id#adding image id#add image id#image id added#id added#id adding#screenreader friendly#hopefully#i have a lot of spoons and am bored so I did this#also I don't know how to tell if there's alt text so sorry if there already was lol#jokes#joke#meme#ai meme#ai joke#funny#we wrote this! wow!
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i worry a lot about some transfems and its not me trying to be like "im better than you" or some shit its bc some of them remind me of me when i was a kid and new into being considered a girl/woman and being really naive thinking people would treat me better than they would- like i knew people were gonna be shitty but i wasnt prepared for the sheer amount of dehumanization and being reduced to just a sex object... idk... I just want some of you out there to be careful...
#ik its hard to convey tone and emotion through text but i do really worry.#im sure people have felt the same way about me being new into being considered a guy too. Ik i wasnt prepared for how emotionally distant#guys can be. and how like. atomized we all are and how a lot of guys only know how to interact with the world through violence and#being a dick and .-. basically how a lot of guys are just bullies. idk.#i think if we have experiences that we think we can help others by sharing them and maybe preventing them from making the same mistakes#as us then we should share them yknow. idk.#for me at least it does in some ways feel like im a little kid again learning what its like to navigate a new social setting.#like i didnt realize how much playing pvp games with cis guys suck and ppl who grew up with that are just like. 'yeah. thats just how it is#im literally playing wow rn and playing on a pvp server and i literally never attack anyone sdhjdshjvvfd and ppl are just like.#dicks for NO REASON. im LITERALLY RUNNING AWAY. ugh#i get it dude! this is the only way you can feel like you have a big dick but cmon. you gotta accept the truth some day#^and having to learn to talk like that has been something ive had to adopt from dealing with cis dudes. fun#some transfems i want to grab by the shoulders and shake and be like 'DO YOU KNOW YOU'RE BEING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF'#with a desperate plea in my gaze#'I WANT TO PROTECT YOU BUT I ALSO KNOW PPL HAVE TO LEARN SOME SOCIAL SHIT ON THEIR OWN BUT BY GOD ARE THERE#SOME THINGS I REALLY DO NOT WANT YOU TO HAVE TO FUCKING LEARN ABOUT THAT I HAVE NO CONTROL OVER AND#IS UNFORTUNATELY LIKELY TO HAPPEN TO ANY WOMAN'#why am i becoming a parent. i need to stop. problem is i care too much about people in spite of what ppl might think .-.#i worry so much thats why i yell at ppl online bc i dont want them to get hurt or do something to fuck themselves over idk.#i just... dont express it the best way. like a gym coach or something 🤦#i really am Dad Vibes now huh. how do i stop myself from becoming a dad. i dont even have kids.#well. i have a cat. the eternal rebellious teen. but still#i need to stop expressing my care and fear through anger. its not great. ppl misinterpret me too much w it. but im not mommy enough to#sugarcoat things and coddle people if i feel like thats whats happening. so idk.#i realize this might sound patronizing and im not trying to be at all. to transfems with more experience this is like 'duh' to them probabl#but I'm more talking to the young transfems I see online who seem like they dont go out much and i dont blame them at all for it#its fucking scary out here. especially as a woman. esp as someone alt righters fetishize. and im sorry.
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FUCK IT WE BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 💯💯👍💪💪💪 (two seconds after a full on meltdown)
#imgoing to be alright its going to be alright we're going to be alright#thanks robbie for ur kind words#u the no. 1 fr 💯💯💯💯#meltdown? haha more like shivering and being unable to move n breath el oh el#idk what the correcr term is sorry but also idc#BUT WE'RE GOING TO BE ALRIGHT LADS!!!!!!!!!!!! this shit dont matter to me no more 😏😎😎✌️#thqts a lie#text#personal#wow look at me! humour as a coping mechanism again! who gives a shit if it works amiright lads#sorry#again rhanks robbie i hope u see this#!!!!!!!! ur words means a whole lot to me#why cant i just reply u ask bc i get the Scary! everytime i do 🧍♂️🧍♂️#thabks again
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