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Your Eyes Only
pairing; choi soobin x f!reader x park sunghoon
genre; smut (minor dni), angst, midly toxic, comedy, fluff
summary; Groups projects are the worst, right? But when your group is Soobin and Sunghoon it gets interesting.
content warnings; poly themes, rich kids, university au, jealousy, self-confidence issues, fuck boy!sunghoon, nerd!soobin, alcohol, drug mentioned, mild bullying.
smut warnings; protected sex, semi-unprotected sex, cum play, fingering, oral (f/m giving and receiving), hand job, cum eating, double penetration, anal sex, anal fingering, very mild mlm, pets names/degrading names, dirty talk, glasses kink, begging.
w/c; 21k and some change
a/n; thank you to @junkissed for proofreading for me and givng me the courage to write outside of my svt box. i know this is different BUT if you are looking for the svt version (wonwoo & jeonghan) it is on my patreon right now
before continuing remember reblogs are incredibly important and please read how to support me here
Chewing on the end of your pen, you tap your heel against the leg of the table as you listen to your professor explain the basics of the project that would pass or fail you in his class. You had spent most of your time at university avoiding any course that you knew would involve a group project, but this was one class you couldn’t get out of.
“You will be randomly paired with a partner for this project.” Glancing around, your professor sighs and looks down the list of names in front of him before pursing his lips. “And one group will have to welcome in a third. You can thank those who dropped the class for the uneven number.”
It was no secret that there were those in the class who were well acquainted with each other and those who were set up for success in the business field, so the random assignment of partners was already making everyone nervous. You were somewhere in the middle of everyone. You weren’t unknown, and it wasn’t like you didn’t have connections after you graduated, but you were no Park Sunghoon with your life already on a silver platter in front of you.
Glancing up as your professor starts to move through the classroom, you swallow hard as he starts to call out names, putting together the groups.
“Lee Yongbok, you will be with Kang Taehyun.”
Great. Only one pair had been named, and you already felt like you were going to be left with someone who would leave you with 90% of the work. Puffing up your cheeks, you glance around the room before quicking looking down at your desk when you meet the one person’s eyes that you had been trying to avoid, Sunghoon. He looked so smug—like he didn’t give a shit about who he was put with, because it honestly didn’t matter. He knew he wouldn’t fail, and he probably wouldn’t have to do a damn thing. This would all be fine as long as you didn’t get put with—
“Park Sunghoon, you will be with Y/N Y/L/N.”
Letting out a deep breath, louder than you mean to, you meet your professor's eyes just before he looks down at his clipboard and purses his lips. “I think honestly this might be the perfect group for a third, so I’m going to add Choi Soobin. You don’t mind, do you, Mr. Park?’
Of course your professor had only asked Sunghoon if he minded. What if you had an issue with it? Shifting uncomfortably in his seat, Soobin glances from the professor at the front of the room towards you and then Sunghoon as he rolls his eyes and shakes his head.
“It’s whatever. I can make it work.”
“Perfect, I knew I could count on you.”
The sound of your professor's voice is almost muffled as he continues to call out names, Hwang Yeji being paired with Ning Yizhuo and Park Jongseong with Julie Han. None of them mattered because you could feel eyes on you and were too nervous to look up and see who they belonged to.
“That’s everyone. Now, take the rest of the hour to get acquainted and make a plan for your project. Remember, I want a detailed business plan that I would actually want to put money into. This is 75% of your grade. I expect results.”
Finally looking up, you are relieved to see the room moving into action and no one staring at you. It isn’t until Sunghoon lifts his brows and slides from his chair, picking up his bag, that you feel your heart in your chest. You hadn’t spent much time with him before. He made you nervous—he made almost everyone nervous.
Sunghoon’s father was the CEO of some multimillion-dollar company, and he didn’t even need to be here, except his father wanted him to prove he could take the reins when the time came. Everyone knew that Sunghoon resented the decision, and while he was a genius—truly brilliant—he barely did any of the work and still managed to pass with flying colors by magic every single time.
The other side of Sunghoon was the one that you knew just by reputation. You didn’t have time to party. While some got their way here on their parent’s money, you had gotten in on a scholarship and had to keep your GPA where it was or risk your full ride. You heard about the parties every weekend; you had been invited—but you had stuck to your dorm almost every time. Sunghoon, on the other hand, did not. He hosted the parties and kept putting notches in his bedpost from what you had been told through the rumor mill.
“Dude, shit or get off the pot. Are you sitting on this side of her, or am I?” Sunghoon’s voice made your cheeks heat up as you looked up to watch him and Soobin stand in front of your table.
Soobin was, as far as you knew, the polar opposite of Sunghoon. He was quiet and reserved—more like you. His family was wealthy, and you knew that he probably didn’t need to be here either, but from what you had gathered, he chose to be here, like he had something to prove.
Pushing his glasses up his nose, Soobin narrows his eyes at Sunghoon and sighs before sliding into the chair on your left, leaving the right side open for the other man. He had never gotten along with Sunghoon. They had been in almost every single class together since day one, and somehow Sunghoon always was top of the class. It didn’t matter how much work Soobin put into something; Sunghoon’s smug ass was always one step ahead.
“Hey, Y/N. We, uh—we haven’t talked much. Excited to do the project with—”
“Oh my god, obvious much?”
Sinking down into the chair on your right, Sunghoon rests his arm on the back of your chair and looks around you at Soobin, cutting him off. Meanwhile, in the middle, you felt small as the tension built between the two. Clearing your throat, you lean forward to grab your notebook and pen in an attempt to clear the air.
“I’m excited to do the project with you too, Soobin.” Glancing towards him, you quickly look at Sunghoon, finding that it feels like a mistake as he meets your eyes with a smirk. “And with you too, Sunghoon, you know… of course.” Your mouth feels dry as Sunghoon’s smirk widens into a smile, his eyes moving over your face and dropping to your lips before he nods and furrows his brows in a teasing manner.
“Oh, I’m sure. You look thrilled, princess.”
Opening your mouth, you quickly close it as Sunghoon calls you princess, managing to fluster you even further. “I—no, I am. I mean—I just…um.” Shaking your head, you drop your pen onto your notebook and fish your cellphone from your purse as you swallow hard. “We should probably exchange numbers or something. So we can plan a time to meet and work on the project.”
Nodding, Soobin straightens his back as he furrows his brows, trying to keep his head clear as you struggle so much with your words. He hadn’t been lying when he said he was excited to work on the project with you. You had caught his eye weeks—maybe even months—ago and now he had a reason to talk to you, if he could keep Sunghoon’s claws off of you.
“Yeah, sure. Uh—” Smiling as you turn towards him, Soobin watches as you put his number into your phone; your thumbs quickly move over the screen before you tilt your head and meet his eyes.
“What emoji do you want?” Up close, Soobin was even more handsome than you realized. You weren’t stupid; you had looked at him and at Sunghoon before. While Sunghoon was a dangerous sort of sexy that made you both terrified and excited, Soobin made your stomach feel warm and tight when he smiled at you.
“Emoji? Do I need one?”
Sighing, you give Soobin an exasperated look as you scroll through the emoji’s landing on the smiley face with glasses. “Everyone needs one. You can’t be the only one without one in my phone, Soobin.”
“Are you gonna pick one out for me, or do I get to pick?”
Sunghoon’s voice causes chill bumps to erupt along your skin as you press your lips together and turn back in your seat to face the front of the room. “Uh, no, you can pick. I mean, unless you just want me to pick.”
Grinning at how flustered you seem every single time you talk to him, Sunghoon raises his brow and glances down at your phone as you put his name in and wait for him to tell you his number. “You can call or text anytime.” Leaning his arm back on his own chair, Sunghoon tilts his head as you go back up to his name and start to scroll through the emojis, not commenting on what he had said. “You pick one. I’m curious to see what you’ll choose.”
Taking a deep, shaky breath, you glance to the side at Sunghoon before letting it out in a sharp sigh, trying not to let him get to you. You aren’t sure if it’s just wanting to try to prove something to him or stupidity, but with a small burst of confidence, you purse your lips together and scroll until you find the devil emoji pressing down on it and then save.
“Wow. Damn, Y/N. That’s kinda hot.” Sliding his phone from his jacket pocket, Sunghoon quickly types your name into his contacts and puts an angel emoji next to your name before turning it towards you for you to put your own number in. “I already have Soobin’s number; I just need yours, Angel.”
Leaning his head back, Soobin tries not to show how annoyed he is at Sunghoon’s blatant flirting with you after he had tried to embarrass him from the get-go. Instead, he waits for you to finish putting your number into Sunghoon’s phone and for you to turn to him expectantly. He could almost see how flustered you were, and while Soobin wished that he was the cause, he wasn’t that dense. “Here you go.”
Quickly putting your number into Soobin’s phone, you meet his eyes as you scroll through the emojis one last time before picking the girl with glasses as your emoji and saving it in his phone. “Cool. Uh, did you guys wanna go ahead and set up a time and place to get started on the project? I kinda have a few ideas for some business proposals, but of course we should all have some so we can decide together.”
You were so cute as you tried to stay on task. No matter how much Sunghoon tried to tease you, and no matter how flustered he made you, you still found your way back to the task at hand. You were persistent; he had to hand it to you.
“I’m good anytime—well, not anytime. I have plans this weekend. So anytime before Friday night.”
Rolling his eyes, Soobin lets out a loud sigh and leans towards the table to rest his forearms on the top. Of course Sunghoon would have plans and make the rest of the group work around them. Furrowing his brows at Soobin’s outburst, Sunghoon shifts in his chair and lifts his hand from the table like a question.
“Problem?”
“I mean, yeah. Literally told, this is basically our entire grade and you’d rather get trashed—”
The tension is once again getting thick. You sit up straight and clear your throat, trying to stop the argument before it starts. You had been concerned about this group for other reasons, and now you were starting to realize you were going to be spending your time trying to keep Sunghoon and Soobin from killing each other for the few weeks it would take to complete the project and present it.
“We don’t have to meet this weekend. How about Thursday? No one has to cancel plans right now. We are just getting started.” Glancing from one man to the other, you look for sympathy as a slight pout forms on your lips. “Please don’t argue. I just want to get a good grade on this. I really need it. I just need you guys to help me pick something out, and I’ll research. I don’t need much.”
Taking a breath and pursing his lips, Sunghoon lets his eyes stay on Soobin for a moment longer—a look of contempt evident before he shifts his gaze to you, and it softens slightly. “It’s a date. Your place or mine?”
Hearing a soft, flustered “oh” leave your lips, Soobin shakes his head and sits back in his chair as you pick up your pen to just have something to do with your hands. Every class that he had shared with Sunghoon had gone exactly like this; somehow this was already worse. He had avoided having to do projects with him, and he hadn’t had to watch him flirt with the one girl he was interested in. It was like Sunghoon knew and was doing it on purpose.
“I—you know, either. Or, we could like just... Meet at the library and grab a room.” You could feel Sunghoon’s eyes, almost like they were burning your skin with how intense his gaze was. Soobin, on the other hand, was almost avoiding you now. “Or if Soobin has another idea—”
“I don’t like the library. I’d rather meet at my dorm or yours, Y/N.” Finally looking back up at you, Soobin sighs when he meets your eyes, and you nod, your teeth catching your bottom lip as you shift in your chair.
“Sh—sure, yeah. We can just meet at mine. Thursday, like 4 o’clock?”
Sunghoon smirks even as he nods, his eyes not even moving to the front of the room as everyone else in the room starts to move, noticing the time. Normally he would already be out the door and on his way on to the next thing, but you were far more interesting. “See you then, angel.”
“Yea—sure, sounds good.” Clearing his throat, Soobin is the first to move to his feet and grab his things before you push back your chair to do the same, causing you to take a step towards him. Taking a deep breath, Soobin meets your eyes and gives you a shy smile as he mutters an apology and steps off to the side, feeling his neck and face heating up.
“No problem.”
Your mind was spinning, every thought in it clouded by the scent of Soobin’s cologne, even though he isn’t right in front of you anymore as you lean over to pick up your bag and pull it up into your chair to pack up your things quickly. Sliding out of his chair, Sunghoon tilts his head, watching how your skirt lifts up just slightly on your thighs when you pick up your bag before he sighs and runs his fingers through his hair and raises his brows at an obviously flustered Soobin. He got it. You were cute as fuck and oblivious to how either one of them was looking at you. It was maddening.
“Text me later and let me know if you want me to bring drinks or something to this rager we are planning.” Walking backwards out of the room, Sunghoon flashes you a smile and winks as he turns on his heels out of the door.
“I—jesus. He’s insufferable.”
Glancing over to Soobin with your bag on your shoulder, you can’t help the smile that pulls at your lips when he voices his displeasure for Sunghoon. You knew about their competitive nature in classes, but seeing it up close was a completely different thing. “He’s kinda funny, I don’t know. It’ll be okay. We just need a topic, and this will be easy, Soobin. Don’t stress about it. I’ll text you both later about Thursday.”
Letting out another breath watching you wave at him as you slip out of the room, Soobin leans his head back and curses under his breath at his shit luck. If this had been any other class and any other project when he could have you to himself, he might actually be looking forward to this. But no, Sunghoon had to be right there to fuck it up.
Tapping the screen of your phone, you sigh as the time ticks closer and closer to 4 p.m. You had managed to speed clean your small dorm room into something presentable within an hour, but even as you sat on your now freshly made bed, you were nervous about Sunghoon and Soobin seeing where you lived half of the year.
The knock at your door sends your heart into a panic; you feel it rising into your throat as you slide off your bed and smooth down the skirt of your dress as you give a quick glance at the mirror before reaching for the door handle. It doesn’t surprise you when you see Soobin first. He seemed, out of the two, the most responsible and prompt.
“Come in.” Taking a step back, you find yourself having to look down as a smile pulls at your lips, heat spreading over your cheeks at how Soobin looks at you. He didn’t look much different than any other day, but that was what you liked about him.
Pushing the dark frames of his glasses up his nose, Soobin’s smile widens as he moves past you into your room so he can glance around quickly. You were tidy and adorable. He was happy that you hadn’t decided to study in his room. Not that he was living like an animal, but it was overwhelming in the best ways to be surrounded by all of your things and your perfume.
“You can sit down anywhere. Sorry, I don’t have many options, but the desk and bed are up for grabs. I can always sit on the floor.”
Furrowing his brows at your words, Soobin shakes his head and drops his bag from his shoulder next to your desk before turning around to meet your eyes. “I wouldn’t make you sit on the floor. I’m sure there’s enough room for us all—”
You watch as Soobin’s smile fades slightly along with his words when the second knock draws his attention from you and towards the door. Swallowing hard, you shake out your hands before moving back to the door and pulling it open, instantly meeting Sunghoon’s eyes.
“I’m late to the party.”
Shaking your head, you step to the side. Gesturing for Sunghoon to come inside, you lick your lips as you try to think of the right words. “Uh, no—no. Soobin just got here. We were just talking about where to sit. I was telling him that you guys are welcome to sit on the bed and at my desk and I can sit on the floor.”
“Shit, why would you sit on the floor?” Scoffing, Sunghoon glances around your room much like Soobin had before he nods at the other man and meets your eyes once again. “We can both sit on the bed. Plenty big enough, princess.”
Soobin watches with narrowed eyes as Sunghoon sits on your bed and makes a face of approval before patting the spot next to himself. “Unless you wanna sit on my lap.”
Starting to sit down next to Sunghoon, you almost fall on to the bed out of shock as your breath gets caught in your throat at his bold words. “What? No! I’m fine here.”
“I’m playing with you.” Poking at your side, Sunghoon smirks when you recoil from his teasing, but still a smile pulls at your pretty lips. “Have to lighten the mood somehow. You two are so uptight.”
With a shake of his head, Soobin rolls his eyes and pulls your desk chair out from under the table, turning it towards your bed with more force than necessary. He wished he had been just a bit quicker and less of a chicken shit when it came to you and sat on the bed instead of letting Sunghoon do it. “Just here to actually get something done, Sunghoon. It’s not a party; those happen at your frat house.”
Humming into a nod, Sunghoon leans back on your bed to rest on his elbows as you shift slightly near him to pick up your laptop, resting it on your thighs. “Sure isn’t a party, but speaking of. Y/N, you got plans this weekend? We are having a little get-together, and you should stop by.” Glancing towards Soobin quickly, almost dismissing him, Sunghoon sighs before giving you a tight smile and adding, “Soobin is invited too, of course.”
You tilt your head at your computer screen, glancing towards Sunghoon and then Soobin before trying to pay more attention to the document you had already started the night before for the group project. “Um, I—well, I don’t really party. I don’t even know what those parties are like—”
“Oh, you know... a quiet house that smells like febreeze or some shit, literally no crap in the way. Oh, and uh, everyone there will 100% be over 21, scouts honor.” Grinning at the look on your face, Sunghoon quickly puts up his hands and laughs at his own joke, adding, “Seriously, it’ll be fun and good for you. Let your hair down and shit.”
Wrinkling your nose at Sunghoon’s attempt to convince you, you bite at your bottom lip unknowingly, drawing his and Soobin’s attention to where your teeth pull at your soft lips. “I don’t—”
“I’ll go if you do, Y/N.”
Meeting Soobin’s eyes surprised, Sunghoon tilts his head as you do the same and smiles.
“Really? I—okay, I guess. I could come for an hour or two. Couldn’t hurt, right?”
Sunghoon realized in that moment he probably needed to thank Soobin for convincing you to go to the party, but at the same time you had only agreed if he was going. That didn’t bode well for him. Did you like Soobin? Did you like Soobin more than him? Pursing his lips, Sunghoon watches you turn your attention back to your laptop, your fingers moving smoothly over the keys as you start working on a project he’d barely given any thought to. “I promise it’ll be fun. Now, what are you working on?”
Adjusting on the bed so Sunghoon can see your laptop screen, you start to explain an idea you had about a law firm sharing your three names—Choi, Park, and Y/L/N—when you realize that Soobin is straining his next trying to see and pay attention. "Oh, um—maybe—Sunghoon? Could you scoot down? I think maybe if we lean back against the wall, we can all sit on the bed and use my laptop.”
Sitting up, Sunghoon shrugs as he lets out a long breath before doing as you asked and scooting down very slightly so you can do the same, finding yourself right against his side. You don’t see the smirk on his lips as his eyes move over your face while you watch Soobin move from your desk chair and to the other side of you, now snugly between the two.
“Is this okay? Or is it too close? I know my bed’s kinda small.”
When you start to wiggle, trying to give either man a bit more room, Soobin shakes his head and stretches his back against the wall you are all leaning against. “I’m comfortable, Y/N. Tell us about the law firm.” He didn’t want you to move, or for you or Sunghoon to make him move. He was enjoying the feeling of you warm against his side, your leg against his, your sweet perfume invading his senses.
It was difficult for either Sunghoon or Soobin to really pay attention to the work in front of them. There was nothing wrong with what you had suggested; it was as good as anything else anyone could come up with. The issue was you. It was difficult to think about some make-believe law firm when you have a pretty girl sighing with her body against yours. His mind starts to wander, and he finds himself imagining if her moans might sound as sweet and pretty as her sighs.
At least, that was where Soobin’s mind was. Sunghoon’s eyes were doing most of the wandering. You were so focused on your screen, your lips moving as you asked their opinion to change some idea only to get a nod of approval from each of them as Sunghoon took in every detail he could see. You were gorgeous. How hadn’t he tried to get with you yet? Probably because you didn’t come to the parties he did. You had other priorities—Sunghoon’s only priority now was to see the rest of you after trying to memorize every freckle, mole, and dimple on your exposed skin.
“We could talk about how one of our specialties is pro-bono work. Maybe Soobin?” Glancing up to get another opinion, you feel your cheeks burn when you find two sets of eyes watching you intently. You wait a few seconds before looking down and clearing your throat, realizing that neither is answering you, almost as if they were too distracted. “Soobin?”
Taking a deep breath of his own, Soobin finally meets your eyes before quickly looking at the screen in front of you to try to catch back up. “Sure, yeah… I’d be into that.”
“Cool.” Nodding, you tilt your head and add in a few more notes to the section, feeling Soobin’s eyes once again move over your face. “We can meet up and go more into depth with each section if you want. I think Sunghoon would take the business law section... I mean, you know, following in his father’s footsteps, blah blah blah.”
Your voice trails off as your finger moves over the trackpad. Sunghoon grins as you choose his “profession” in the law firm for him. “Blah, blah, blah... Sure, whatever you think, princess. And I can meet up at the party, or next week.”
The idea of talking about your project at a party where Sunghoon would undoubtedly be drunk or high makes your brows knit together as you look over at him. “I—we can’t do this at the party. That’s silly. I mean, if you wanna meet before the party and go over a few things, that I can do.”
Now you were saying shit that made sense. Sunghoon loved the idea of having you to himself for a bit. “Perfect. You can come over a couple of hours before and we can set this in stone; that sounds fair.”
Soobin wasn’t an idiot; he could almost see the wheels turning in Sunghoon’s head as the man’s eyes moved over your face and along your neck. He thought if he could get you alone, he might have a chance at getting laid—two could play that game. Soobin wasn’t sure where the desire—no, the need to beat Sunghoon—had originated, but he knew when it came to you, he had to win. “And we can meet up tomorrow; finish up my section.”
Suddenly your week and weekend had gotten packed. You were used to door-dashing food on a Friday and vegging out in your pajamas as you caught up on your work, but now you had to figure out how to look presentable for Choi Soobin.
“Okay…” Your voice is softer than you intend; you lean to pick up your phone from your nightstand, leaning over Soobin’s lap for a few seconds before you rest back in your spot. You don’t realize the effect you have on either of the men and how their eyes meet after both struggle to hold in groans watching your dress ride up your thighs. “So tomorrow, Soobin—maybe we can meet back here at like 7?” Sighing at your calendar, you click your tongue against your teeth and nod before continuing. “And Sunghoon, I can come a couple of hours early; does that work?”
Neither need much convincing after their shared glances, a rare understanding between them as they both mutter in agreement.
Taking a deep breath, Soobin stares at your dorm room door as he adjusts his bag on his shoulder, mostly out of nerves. He had just been here the day before, but it felt different being here alone with you. Not that he was even close to complaining; it would be nice to work with you—get to know you without Sunghoon looming over his shoulder or yours.
It was just before 7 o'clock, and you had been looking at your phone consistently for the past hour and a half to keep track of the time. Both Soobin and Sunghoon made you nervous; however, there was something about Soobin that you couldn’t quite shake.
Sunghoon was easy to understand. He was forward—too forward, at times, but at least you knew what was on his mind. Soobin, on the other hand, was quiet and reserved. You had felt your skin go hot as an oven under his eyes while you had sat next to him on the bed, and now you were going to be alone with him.
Knocking lightly, Soobin puffs up his cheeks and waits. All of his anxiety about seeing you melts away the moment his eyes move over your pretty face. The knot in his stomach that had told him earlier in the day to reschedule the study session releases, and he lets out the breath he had been holding and smiles at you.
“Hey. You loo—I mean—” Clearing his throat, Soobin’s eyes stay transfixed on you as a smile pulls at your lips and you step back, giving him room to move through the door. “I hope I’m not bothering you or anything.”
Shaking your head, you close your door as your brows furrow at Soobin’s words. He was so handsome and sweet it made your head spin. He confused you with how soft he seemed. It made you want to get to know him better—get to know the real Soobin.
“Why would you be bothering me? We planned this, Soobin.” Gesturing towards your bed, you sigh softly as Soobin sits down near where he had the day before, dropping his bag into the floor in front of him.
“No—yeah… I mean, I know. Just saying—I mean, I’m just trying not to be a—” Letting out a soft sigh on his breath, Soobin shakes his head before taking in a deeper breath to steady himself. “What I’m trying to say is that I’m glad we get to do this project together, Y/N.”
You pull your leg up under you so that you almost rest on your knees facing Soobin as you sit next to him. “I’m glad too. I—” Glancing down, you feel a wave of uncertainty rushing over you as your cheeks start to burn. You couldn’t help but feel shy under his gaze as you spoke, or tried to, your voice quiet. “I’m glad too. I kinda feel bad for you and Sunghoon being stuck with me. I know neither of you would probably pick me if you had a cho—”
“That’s crazy, Y/N. I’d pick you in a heartbeat.” Shaking his head, Soobin shifts on your bed, turning towards you, feeling a bit bolder as frustration runs through his veins at your words. “Why the hell would you even think that I wouldn’t? Fuck what Sunghoon thinks. I want to know why you think that I wouldn’t want you.”
Almost as if he’s realizing what he had said, seeing the look of surprise on your face—your eyes widening in slight confusion and shock—Soobin licks his lips and opens his mouth before closing it and taking a breath through his nose. He hadn’t meant it how it sounded—but perhaps he had; he didn’t want to scare you. “I mean… Uh—just… Of course I wanna do this project with you. It’s stupid to think I wouldn’t want—”
Even Soobin knew he was talking himself in circles as you tilted your head so innocently at him. He wasn’t Sunghoon. He hadn’t come here with the intention to flirt your pants off. He wasn’t some fuckboy asshole with an agenda.
Swallowing hard, Soobin lowers his eyes to his legs and then further towards his bag before reaching for it, unzipping it quickly, and taking out his laptop to try to change the subject. He could feel your eyes on him, and the heat, while overwhelming, was also making his jeans tighter. Settling the laptop on to his lap, Soobin shifts uncomfortably at the feeling of the pressure before puffing up his cheeks, still grateful to have something hiding his potential problem as he willed himself to calm the fuck down.
“So… I—I uh, tried to expand on what you said about the pro bono part of the practice and came up with a few things if you wanna take a look.”
Your eyes move along Soobin’s face, from his glasses to his perfect lips as his tongue darts along them to keep them from drying out from nerves and finally down towards his lap and to the screen now open for you. You could see how he was fidgeting—almost as if he was uncomfortable where he was sitting, the screen of the laptop moving very slightly as he sighs and scrolls down, letting you try to read over what he had come up with.
“It’s… Yeah—sounds good.”
“You sure? You don’t sound convinced." Soobin’s anxiety was peaking at the sound of your voice. He had royally fucked up. Now you were upset with him even when it came to the project, and he was going to spiral.
“No—I mean yes! Yes! It’s good. Soobin, it’s just—can you stop, like wiggling? I can’t read it when you are doing that. Can I see it? Let me hold it.” Reaching for his laptop, you furrow your brows at the quick, sharp breath Soobin takes before your hand slides over his on his lap.
“I—Y/N… Yes, you can, but!” Fuck. Feeling the laptop being pulled from his lap, Soobin closes his eyes when he hears you take a breath, and a small “oh” leaves your lips. Mortified—that is all that Soobin feels as he blindly reaches for one of your throw pillows, pulling it into his lap, still unable to bring himself to look at you.
If you had known what Soobin had been hiding with his laptop, you might not have just grabbed it—or at least you would have gone about it a different way. Grimacing as Soobin turns his head away from you, the pillow now over his lap, you start to speak but stop when you realize you aren’t sure what to say at first.
Now things that Soobin had said were sort of starting to make a bit more sense, and still not completely. Maybe he was just being a guy. Perhaps he was already having his... problem before he had even gotten to your room, and this had nothing to do with you, but you can’t stop yourself from glancing down at the pillow in Soobin’s lap one more time out of curiosity. What if it was because of you?
“Soobin?”
Leaning his head back when you say his name, Soobin groans under his breath. It was a mixture of embarrassment and arousal. Being around you, seeing so much of your skin on display, the words you had said so innocently that he had let his dirty mind twist... “Hmm?”
Closing Soobin’s laptop, you lean to put it on the floor out of harm's way before resting back on your knees, your eyes once again moving over the man beside you as he keeps his eyes on the ceiling as if trying to disappear. Maybe you could test your theory. Was Soobin into you, or was this just a fluke thing? There was no one else around... you had always been such a good girl at university; how bad could it be to help out someone who clearly needed help?
“Well, I was just—I thought... Do you want me to help you with that? You know if you like me like that?”
He had been doing halfway decent at getting himself calmed down. Soobin had been solving basic trigonometry problems in his head to get his cock to behave, but the moment you ask him if he wants help, all his hard work is out the window. Feeling his cock twitch in his boxers, Soobin bites at his cheek, slowly lowering his head and glancing over at you meeting your seemingly innocent eyes.
You were like a siren in the middle of the vast blue ocean, and he would swim to his death gladly. You had asked another stupid question, causing Soobin’s blood to boil, but the most he could manage at first was to scoff at you, making you recoil and pout, feeling rejected.
"Oh, I—no problem. Sorry I misread the situ—”
“Y/N, please.” Taking a deep breath, Soobin cuts you off again, knowing he has to stop you before you spiral this time. “You have no fucking idea how much I like you like that, or how much I like you in general.” Gripping the pillow tightly over his lap, Soobin groans a bit louder as he boldly lets his eyes move over your face and body this time. You were really the prettiest girl he had ever seen, and this had to be a fucking wet dream that he was going to wake up from at any moment. “But, are you serious? You wanna help me? I didn’t mean for this to happen. I just—god, you are just so cute, and you were looking at me like that. I couldn’t help it.”
Biting your bottom lip, you smile into a soft laugh as you feel warmth spread over your cheeks at Soobin’s words and compliments. You would have never expected to have such an effect on him. You’d never tell him now how many times you laid in bed right where he was sitting and thought about him as you played with the toys in your drawer. You wouldn’t have the guts to tell him just yet how at night you would think about him and wearing his glasses as he buried his—
“Shit—seriously. You gotta stop lookin’ at me like that. I’m gonna cum in my pants. You really have no idea what you look like.”
Soobin’s words bring you out of your daydream and back to reality as you let your eyes once again drop to the pillow in his lap. “What do I look like, Soobin?”
You weren’t trying to be particularly sexy. You weren’t even really sure how to. That wasn’t your “strong” point, but to Soobin, you didn’t have to try. Your innocence was doing it all. Your sweet voice with that layer of teasing was driving him insane as you reached for the pillow, moving it out of his lap and letting you see how hard he really was for you.
“Ah—fuck. Um… Just—it’s hard to... It’s hard to talk when you’re like this.” Leaning back on your bed to rest on his elbows, Soobin watches you closely as you shift closer to him, your fingers running along his thighs over his jeans. "But, uh, you look like you want me to fuck you. Like, uh, this want in your eyes. ‘Fuck me’ eyes, I guess.”
Rubbing your lips together, you carefully graze your fingertips over the bulge in Soobin’s jeans, feeling him thrust off the bed towards you. “Maybe I do want that.” Smiling, you tilt your head, your eyes following your fingers as you smoothly undo his jeans, feeling his stomach suck in under your light touch. “You know, one day. This isn’t a one-time thing, right?”
“God…no.” Shaking his head, Soobin licks his lips and claws at the comforter under him, feeling the drag of his zipper along his hard cock. “I hope not. Trust me, Y/N. I want you so fucking bad. Wanted you for—ah, wait!” Soobin’s voice becomes a whine when you pull away from him to sit back, his eyes widening as he follows you confused.
“I’m not leaving you. Why are you pouting at me, Binnie?” Standing beside the bed, you sway your hips side to side ever so slightly as you work your leggings down your legs, leaving you in your panties and t-shirt, causing Soobin’s mouth to go dry. “I’m just getting comfortable. You should too.”
Groaning your name under his breath, Soobin shakes his head as you use a nickname for him as you take off part of your clothes. Yes, he had seen your legs before when you had worn dresses or a skirt before, but this was different—it was so, so, fucking different. He could see the damp spot on the front of your panties; it was making his head spin.
Soobin quickly sits up and kicks off his jeans, feeling some relief from just a layer of clothes being off, but still his boxers felt sticky against his cock, leaking almost obscenely as you stood in front of him waiting. “You want these off too, pretty?” Trying out the pet name, Soobin watches the smile pull at your lips as you nod and move back to the end of your bed to sit on your knees again. “Okay… Yeah, I can do that.”
Nerves almost getting the better of him, Soobin digs his thumbs into the top of his boxers and pauses as he starts to lift his hips, hoping he will look good enough for you. It wasn’t like he was ashamed of how he looked, but you felt special to him. He wanted to be perfect for you and look exactly like who you wanted, but this was so sudden that he didn’t know anything about what you liked or wanted in bed.
You could see the apprehension in Soobin’s face, the way his brows furrowed when he paused. You hadn’t meant to pressure him, if that’s what he was feeling. “You okay? If you don’t wanna take them off, you don’t have to. I can help you with them on or, you know, we don’t have to—”
“I—woah, no, no! I want to. Just—nervous. What if you don’t like what you see?”
Shaking your head, you shift closer to Soobin on your hands and knees, not even thinking about how you would look to him or what effect it would have on him until he lets out a shaky breath on a groan. Glancing up at him, that same look in your eyes as before, you smile, sliding your hand over his thigh and tilting your head when it becomes clear to you how turned on he is seeing you like you are on the bed in front of him. “I’m gonna like it, Soobin. You are so handsome. I bet every single part of you is. So... can I see it?”
Eyes moving over your arched back down to your ass, Soobin shakes his head in disbelief, feeling your fingers walk slowly up his thigh towards his cock. You were either an angel or a demon; he hadn’t figured it out yet, but at the same time, Soobin wasn’t sure it mattered. He’d gladly give up his soul and die like this if it meant feeling your fingers sliding over his cock.
“Yeah, you can see it. It’s yours, pretty.” Speaking on an exhale, Soobin leans his head back as he relishes in the feeling of your hand molding to the outline of his cock through his boxers. It felt like heaven, and yet it wasn’t enough. He knew he wanted your skin on his. Lifting his hips, Soobin opens his eyes, locking them with yours as he pushes his boxers down and kicks them across the floors before leaning back against your pillows, finally stretching his legs out along your bed.
You know you should be a bit more subtle; slowly work your way down to looking at Soobin’s cock, but the moment he is laid out on your bed, it’s the first thing you do. You weren’t sure what you had been expecting. You had felt him through his boxers in your hand, and you had known he was on the bigger side, but seeing and feeling were different things. “Wow…”
“Wow?” While Soobin enjoyed you looking at him, he had expected a bit more than a single word. Lifting his hand from the bed, he nervously runs his fingers along your arm down to your wrist, wrapping his fingers around it as he lifts his brows. Finally meeting your eyes as you lift your head, he smiles at you and watches you glance away shyly at first. “What? Hey, no. Please? I’m half naked here.”
You knew it wasn’t fair, but you had one of the hottest guys at your school on your bed with his cock hard and out for you; now you were feeling like you might not be skilled enough to help him. “You’re big, Soobin. I’ve never—you know? Someone as big as you. I’m too nervous.”
Soobin hadn’t been sure that his ego could get as big as it did when you spoke, but his shoulders were suddenly tighter and his chest suddenly felt a bit firmer with how you were looking at him. “Yeah? I— fuck. I don’t… I could make it fi—” Shaking his head, not wanting to sound like a cocky asshole, afraid of sounding like Sunghoon on accident, Soobin slides his fingers along your forearm and back down to your hand, taking it into his. “We don’t have to do anything crazy. Just whatever you feel comfortable with, okay, beautiful?”
Your heart beats a bit harder at Soobin’s words and how sweet he is by not pressuring you into doing something that was too much too fast. As much as you might want him to fuck you or to try to fit your mouth around him, tonight just wasn’t that night—but that didn’t mean there weren’t other things you couldn’t do.
Nodding, you bite your lip as you shift on the bed to sit over Soobin’s thighs, hearing him suck in a breath when you do. “This okay?” Getting a nod from him, you smile before cautiously scooting forward and stopping short of his cock, letting it rest against your thigh, his pre-cum smearing along your soft skin. “Lean against the headboard? I wanna kiss you while I do this, if that’s okay.”
Soobin had never moved so fast in his life at the thought of kissing you. He had wanted to kiss you for months, if not a year or more. He had found himself staring at your lips and not paying attention in several classes more than once since he had first met you... and now it was becoming a reality.
Scratching your nails along his chest as you finally close the space between you and him, you can’t help the smile that finds your lips when he groans your name, feeling the warmth between your legs. His cock nudges between your legs, the tip firmly pressed against your cotton panties, and Soobin closes his eyes tightly and squeezes your thighs without thinking.
“Fuck… Please don’t tease me, baby.”
Soobin hadn’t meant to call you a pet name, but it had slipped off his tongue like sugar against your lips before the first kiss. You weren’t trying to tease him, but he felt so good right where he was. His lips, even brushing against yours, felt so good, but the first real kiss was enough to make you see stars.
Groaning into your mouth, Soobin slides his fingers along your thighs to your hips, where he squeezes again and pulls you closer to him as he rolls his hips towards yours. His tongue glides along yours before he swallows your soft, sweet moans to keep them for himself, knowing with each moan from your mouth he is leaking against your panties like a teenager, soaking through to your skin.
It’s when you do finally reach between your legs and wrap your fingers around Soobin’s cock, your smaller hand tightening around his shaft and stroking him from base to tip, that he throws his head back against your headboard, breaking the kiss. “Shit, that feels so good. I’m too worked up, baby. I won’t last if you—ah.”
You could tell from how Soobin was whining into his groans and the way he was short of breath that he was already close. Pre-cum was running along your fingers, making each stroke of your hand smooth as you rocked your hips towards his until you suddenly released your grip and met his eyes.
“Wh—why? Why are you teasing me? I was so close. Pretty girl, please!” The last plead from Soobin’s mouth is sharp, his usually deeper voice going up an octave as you sit back on his legs, wrapping your fingers back around his length and pressing his tip against the center of your panties before stroking him against your clothed, warm pussy.
“Why do you act like I’m punishing you, Binnie? Does this not feel good? What if I just wanted to feel a little bit?”
Eyes rolling back, Soobin bites his bottom lip as he thrusts up between your hand and panties, feeling the damp cotton under his sensitive cock. There aren’t many thoughts in his brain as he shakes his head and mutters your name, staring to lose himself in the feeling. He finds himself wishing, praying, and hoping to feel your pussy around his cock when he feels soft and warm skin pulling him back to reality.
Glancing down between your legs, Soobin only has seconds to watch his cock sliding between your folds, the tip of his cock rubbing your clit before he’s done for. Warm, sticky, white ropes paint your lower stomach and folds as Soobin pants through his climax, his fingers digging into your thighs hard enough to leave bruises.
“Shit, Soobin…” The words fall from your lips on a soft moan as your clit throbs, begging you for more, but you know that he���s done. You can feel Soobin’s cock start to soften in your hand as he whines your name, his fingers still kneading your thighs.
Searching your face, Soobin watches the pout start to form on your lips, your bottom lip jutting out just slightly as your hand loosens around him and you start to scoot back on your bed. It wasn’t fair. He felt great. You had taken him to heaven and back, yet he could see the disappointment written on your face. That just wouldn’t work for him.
“You’re so fucking pretty.”
Soobin’s compliment brings your attention back to him, your eyes meeting his as he licks his lips. Quickly your cheeks warm up, words getting caught in your throat as you try to think of the right thing to say—anything when you feel the tightness in your stomach from want though you don’t know or want to ask for something when you had only offered to help.
“Baby…” Whining the pet name, Soobin slides to his knees, his hands once again finding your hips as he helps you to the center of your bed. “Can I touch you? Make you feel good?” Letting his eyes move between your legs, Soobin groans at the sight of his cum on your stomach and the peek of it between your legs—how your pussy lips aren’t quite covered by your panties that are painted by him. He finds himself wanting to run his finger through it... Put it where it belongs—inside you. “Are you—mmm, this is a really personal question but probably important to ask, since we are in bed together. Are you on birth control?”
Your thighs tremble at Soobin’s touch, suddenly shy at his attention and his question. It was a valid and fair question, and yet how he asked it made you feel like you were burning up, as if you were right beside an open flame. Unable to find the words, you just nod quickly and suck on your bottom lip.
“Yes? To which question, pretty girl? I asked two.”
Closing your eyes, you whine Soobin’s name and lean your head back, causing him to laugh under his breath even as his fingers trail along your thighs. “Both of them. Please… I helped, right? I was good?”
The question makes Soobin furrow his brows, his throat suddenly dry as if sand were poured in his mouth instead of water. Why were you able to say something so simple and innocent and it sound so filthy? Why did you have this sort of effect on him? Pushing his mouth against his bicep, Soobin nods before moving one hand from your leg to push his glasses up his nose. “Very fucking good, baby. The best. Now let me be good for you.”
You want to tell Soobin that he is already good, but the words get lost on your tongue when his lips press to your knee as his fingers pull your ruined panties to the side and his other hand is free to explore. Mouth falling open in a silent moan, you try to watch carefully as Soobin’s fingers carefully push your sticky folds apart, giving him access to everything he wants.
“You got so messy with my cock..." Soobin was muttering, not even really speaking to you as he studied what was in front of him, his thumb circling your clit as he spread his cum along your skin. Finally meeting your eyes again, Soobin swallows hard watching you lick your lips, your chest rising and falling hard and fast with each panting moan. “Can I fuck you with my fingers? That okay?”
Clinging to the bedding, you nod hard, wanting to feel more of Soobin’s touch. You weren’t blind, and you knew he probably wasn’t either. You had been staring at his hands. His hands were big, his fingers thick, and the idea of Soobin just touching you had you leaking and mewing like a cat in heat. “Yeah, Binnie. Want it, please?”
You wanted it. That was even better than him asking for permission—hearing you beg for it. Smiling against your leg, Soobin nods as he slowly drags more of his cum down before slowly easing the first finger into you. He had cum, and yet feeling you clench around his finger had Soobin’s cock throbbing against his leg. He could lie to himself and you and say that he was using the cum on your skin as lube to fuck you on his fingers, but in reality you were so wet he didn’t need it—it was an added bonus being able to know that he was inside of you.
“Doin’ so good, beautiful. Gonna add another one; you can take it.” Nodding along with you, Soobin grins when you cry out his name on a moan when he pushes a second finger in to your pussy alongside the first. Your warm, soft walls hug his fingers and pull them in as if you are trying to fuck yourself, too eager to wait for Soobin to do it. “Like that? Feel good?”
It was almost a stupid question, but you nod anyway and mutter out a yes and pleas for more. It was almost too easy for Soobin to get you drunk on him and dumb with just his fingers. You could already feel the coil inside of you winding so tight that it was threatening to snap. Each brush of his fingers and every deep thrust as his thumb circled your clit, and muttered praises pushed you to the edge.
“Good fucking girl, yeah? My girl?”
Soobin knew that was crazy asking you that, making you admit to being his, but when you nod and repeat the words back to him, it makes his head spin. You might not even mean it; most people didn’t mean what they said during sex, but that was okay. Right now, it didn’t matter if you meant it; he would replay it on a loop for the rest of his life, just like he would never forget the feeling of you cumming on his fingers.
“Soobin! Yes, yes! Ah… right there!”
Thighs shaking, tightening around Soobin’s arm, you throw your head back as your orgasm rips through your body, leaving you breathless and spent on your bed. Fingers brush over your cheeks, soft lips meet yours, and you find it impossible not to smile as you return the sweet kiss, feeling Soobin’s arm wrap around you. There was a lot left unsaid. Much of your project was left undone, but you were enjoying the moment as you threw caution to the wind.
Soobin, on the other hand, was letting his mind run in circles as he held you against him. He wanted this. Not just the sex, but this. He wanted you. He wanted you to say you were his and mean it. But how in the fuck was he supposed to say that when he had just now gotten the courage to talk to you during a stupid ass group project?
It could wait. Nothing could possibly happen, right? He just needed a little more time to get his shit together.
Sunghoon had been waiting for something, anything from you or Soobin about what the two of you had gotten done the day before for the project, but yet his inbox was looking bare. Maybe the two of you had decided he wasn’t privy to that information. It wouldn’t surprise him if Choi Soobin decided to pull some shit like that, but you? Nah, you wouldn’t do that. You wouldn’t allow it. Would you?
Sipping on the same beer he had been nursing for an hour, Sunghoon narrows his eyes at the clock on his phone as he bounces his leg along with the music from the next room. Most of the other members of his frat were already pre-gaming, actually enjoying their afternoon, and he was sitting here with a half-stale beer waiting on you.
It shouldn’t piss Sunghoon off as much as it does, but he doesn’t do shit like this for girls. Not for school... not for any reason. Chicks are chicks, and that’s it, so why do you have him sober while Jake Sim was already throwing up in the sink?
He was about to give in and get something stronger than his beer when your name caught his attention on his phone.
Y/N😇: Do I just come in? Should I knock? People are just going inside, but I feel weird. Doesn’t the party start at like 11?
God, you were so cute; it was killing Sunghoon. You rambled even over text. Sliding off the sofa, Sunghoon pockets his cellphone and pushes past a few of the early comers to open the front door and see you looking around like a lost puppy.
Devastating. You were devastating him. Fuck, he was screwed.
“Princess, get your cute ass in the house. Have you never been to a frat party before?”
Eyes widening, you hold the strap of your bag tighter to your shoulder as you turn to meet Sunghoon’s eyes after hearing his voice. It was a valid question, and yet it made you feel small and insecure. Sunghoon wasn’t like you. He was cool and super rich. Everyone wanted him or to be him. You weren’t much different than them supposed, but you were also the one he was calling princess.
“Oh… I—no. Not really. I—”
Scooting to the side as a girl shoots you a dirty look, her attention turning immediately towards Sunghoon, you look away as she coos at him making her way into the house. “Sunghoon! Oh my god, you look so fucking good. Do you wanna, like, you know, chill before—”
This was what Sunghoon had gotten used to. Maybe that was narcissistic of him to expect it, but he was used to girls throwing themselves at him. Yeah, he had accepted a few offers. He had a reputation, but he liked to have fun. He knew at the end of the day none of these girls mattered. They saw status and dollar signs. He saw tits and a distraction, but when he looked at you, he saw something else—frustration and desire.
Shaking his head and sidestepping to get away from the pretty girl and her advances, Sunghoon sighs, giving her a half glance. “Nah. I have shit to do.” When you don’t move, making no effort to meet his eyes again, Sunghoon rolls his eyes, moving down the steps to grab your hand, much to the dismay of the girl as you are ushered inside the house past her. “I told you to come inside, baby.”
“Sunghoon…” Your voice is quiet, almost embarrassed, as you meet the eyes of the girl he had turned down when she hears him call you baby. You can feel the daggers come from her eyes and meet your skin until you are finally out of her sight and heading up the stairs away from the music. “Sunghoon.” Saying his name again, you tug back on his hand at the top of the stairs, landing finally managing to get him to look back at you. “There is so much going on downstairs. Aren’t you going to miss it by doing this with me? I’m not nearly as much fun as that. You don’t have to preten–”
“God, Y/N, shut the hell up already. I said we can work on the project today, and we can.” Pushing his bedroom door open, Sunghoon ushers you inside as your cheeks burn from his words. Watching you move slowly into the room, he narrows his eyes and sighs before running his fingers through his hair. “You’re annoying, you know that?”
Tears prick at your eyes as you walk towards one of the beds in the room, sitting your bag down on it as Sunghoon moves closer behind you. You weren’t sure what you had done to him to make him be so mean to you, but his words were making your stomach twist up in a knotted mess of anxiety and low self-confidence.
Hearing you sniff under your breath, Sunghoon closes his eyes and leans his head back, knowing he upset you. It hadn’t really been his intention. He wasn’t great with words. He just said what was on his mind, and you were annoying him. He just hadn’t clarified why. “Fuck, Y/N. I didn’t mean to make you cry. I—listen, okay?” Hands slide over your arms as Sunghoon slowly turns you towards him, his eyes moving over your face carefully. “What I mean is that you aren’t like the other girls. You make me chase you. I don’t chase girls, Y/N.”
You could understand every word that Sunghoon was saying, and yet nothing he was saying made any sense to you. Shaking your head, you sniff back your tears and lift your shoulders, causing Sunghoon to groan in annoyance before he cups your face with both of his hands leaning in to press his lips to yours.
Every cell in your body misfires at the feeling. Your mind screams for you to run. You quickly think of every rumor you have heard about Sunghoon. You picture every heartbroken girl crying over him as he smirks with his friends the very same day, and yet as he kisses you, his tongue gently gliding along your bottom lip, you start to melt into him. You shouldn’t enjoy feeling Sunghoon’s lips on yours, but you do. You whine into the kiss, and Sunghoon’s brows furrow as his entire body reacts to the sweet sound.
“Holy shit. You sound so pretty, Angel. Do that again for me?”
Sunghoon was different than Soobin. Every touch was precise and calculated. Each step, while not planned, led you right where Sunghoon knew he wanted you. Knees hitting the end of his bed, causing you to fall backwards with another whine, your back hitting the bed, eyes wide as you look up at Sunghoon.
Leaning over you to pick up your bag, Sunghoon moves it to the floor before laying over you and putting his lips back on yours. This hadn’t been the plan. He really was planning on being true to his word and working on the project with you, but then you just had to be so fucking cute and so goddamn frustrating, and now Sunghoon was throwing himself at you.
One hand sliding along your side to your hip, Sunghoon breaks the kiss to meet your eyes with a question hanging in the hair as his fingers play with the end of your dress on your thigh. He would let you say no, but god, he hoped you wouldn’t. He was being pathetic; he could feel his cock throbbing in his pants. The moment you whine his name again and nod, Sunghoon is groaning your name and sliding down in the bed to push your dress up to your stomach.
“You are so cute, princess. Always dressed so pretty.” Shaking his head, Sunghoon traces your bellybutton with his pinky, watching you suck in your stomach on a deep breath, causing his lips to pull up in a smirk. “Won’t lie, recently I’ve been telling myself you’ve been dressing like this for me... Even if I know it’s probably not.”
Carefully pushing the tips of his fingers into the elastic of your panties, Sunghoon lifts his brows in a question again before tilting his head and licking his lips. “Can I? Wanna taste you so fuckin’ bad. Been dreaming about it for days.”
His words have you breathless; you feel almost faint as you nod and lift your hips, letting Sunghoon work your panties down your thighs and off your legs. He had been dreaming about you. More specifically, Park fucking Sunghoon, the wet dream of 90% of all of the girls at your university, had been dreaming about eating you out? There had to be a glitch in the matrix. This couldn’t be happening. You had just spent an evening with Soobin, and now—Sunghoon?
You don’t get much time to process when Sunghoon’s warm, wet tongue runs from your dripping entrance to your already throbbing clit in one smooth motion. Clinging to the comforter, you gasp Sunghoon’s name, closing your thighs around his head, feeling him chuckle against your folds as his hands wrap around your thighs, working them back apart over his shoulders.
There was a reason for many of the rumors that Sunghoon was involved in; most of them had a layer of truth to them. It wasn’t Sunghoon’s fault that he was good in bed or that he loved to eat pussy. There was nothing like listening to a girl squeal his name as he drove her crazy with his tongue alone, but you were something special. No one tasted or felt like you. You were driving him crazy. There was enjoying eating a girl out, and then there was enjoying eating you out. This was heaven.
“Fuck…” Drawing the word out as he runs his fingers over your soft folds, Sunghoon groans, resisting the urge to push his hips against his mattress as he watches your arousal begin to drip and mix with his saliva. Unable to stop himself, Sunghoon uses his thumbs to spread your folds and buries his faces between your legs, hungrily lapping at you like you’re oozing nectar that will sustain him for weeks.
Any coherent thought you once had was gone. Between Sunghoon’s tongue and the groans he was letting out between your legs, you were dumbstruck. Your thighs had already begun to quiver, your stomach tight as your orgasm hung right on the precipice with each drag over Sunghoon’s devious tongue, but it isn’t until he wraps his lips around your clit and sucks that you lose a battle you weren’t really trying to win.
“Cumming…ah! Sunghoon!” In your mind, somewhere buried deep down under the pleasure, you could feel the shame wash over you at the same time as you wonder if you were another notch on the bedpost under your hand, but the kisses to your thigh and the sweet praises bring you back to reality.
“Taste so good. Best fuckin’ girl. Not letting you go, swear to god.” Sunghoon was pussy drunk; he knew it and he knew that you probably knew it, but that didn’t mean the words he was muttering against your skin weren’t real. He loved the feeling of your fingers running through his hair as he licked your cum from his lips, and what Sunghoon loved even more was seeing the fucked-out look on your face, knowing he caused it. “You are so goddamn pretty. No one deserves you; do you know that?”
He was full of pretty words as he moved up in the bed to lay over you, his lips once against pressing to yours before moving along your jaw and neck. You weren’t sure he was telling you the truth. You wanted someone to deserve you. You weren’t sure if that person was him or Soobin, but... someone.
Furrowing your brows, you shift in bed, wanting to return the favor. Sliding your hand over Sunghoon’s jeans, you feel him push towards your hand, a soft groan slipping from his lips.
“You don’t have to do that, Angel, but fuck... I’m so fucking hard.”
He didn’t have to tell you that. You could feel how hard he was even through his jeans, and you knew you didn’t have to do anything; it was more that you wanted to. You knew something like this could distract you from thinking too hard. This was fun. It was easy. Thinking was too hard.
Pushing Sunghoon to his back on the bed, you smile shyly, moving to your knees beside him. You feel his eyes on you as you slowly undo his jeans and let him help you push them down with his boxers, letting his cock rest back against his stomach, leaking heavily.
He was a bit smaller than Soobin—of course you would never tell Sunghoon that, but despite the small size difference, it didn’t mean that his cock wasn’t just as pretty and enticing. You had found yourself taking control with Soobin, but in Sunghoon’s bed you were docile and nervous. You found yourself wanting to prove that you were good enough to be in his bed.
“It’s yours, baby girl. Whatever you wanna do with it—ah, fuck!” Sunghoon was a talker in bed. He might not be good at words that mattered, but he could dirty talk. Only your mouth around his cock could silence him. Hissing as his stomach tightens, feeling you hollow your cheeks as you take in more of his length, Sunghoon curses under his breath.
Normally he could handle getting head. Most girls weren’t that great at it if he were honest, and usually he wasn’t. He’d tell them how good their mouth was, that they did a good job, and he’d cum on their lips or wherever they wanted as he jerked himself off, but you—god, he didn’t have to lie to you. Instead, Sunghoon was digging his fingers into his bedding, forcing himself not to cum down your throat after thirty seconds of his cock being in your mouth.
“So fucking good. Oh, shit. Just—slow down. Baby!” Throwing his head back, eyes rolling back as you let his tip brush the back of your throat, Sunghoon smacks the bed under his hand, pushing his feet into the mattress. You were sucking the soul out of him and not leaving a drop. If this was how Sunghoon was going to die, it was worth it. “Gonna—ah, fuck. It’s too—cumming!”
Furrowing your brows, you close your eyes tighter when Sunghoon cums in your mouth even after warning you. The salty, sour taste hits your tongue, and rather than letting it linger in your mouth as you pull back, sucking one last time to make sure you have every last drop, you swallow.
Sunghoon stares at you, his chest rising and falling with each deep breath when you sit back on your knees to wipe your lips clean of his cum. He was seeing double, and you literally looked like you were glowing, a halo around you like a real fucking angel.
“You tried to murder me.” Licking his lips, Sunghoon moves one of his arms over his head to rest his head on his forearm as his eyes start to focus more. He watches the small smile form on your lips—how shy and sweet you look even as you search for your panties on the floor, reaching down to pick them up and pulling them back on. “Are you leaving me? We still have a project to work on, and I thought I had a date to the party.”
Opening and closing your mouth a few times, you swallow hard, finally meeting Sunghoon’s eyes as he relaxes half naked on his bed as if this is a normal Friday night, which you realize it might be; the shame slipping back in your mind causes you to look away and down at the floor. “Um, I—it’s—you know... Your party starts in like an hour now and I’m not much of a partier—”
“Y/N… seriously? What did I do wrong?” Sitting up, Sunghoon reaches for his own clothes, pulling them back on before scooting closer to you. When you still won’t look at him, shrugging and adjusting your dress over your lap, he gently cups your chin and guides your head back towards him to make you look at him. “Do you regret what happened? Should I apologize? I just—I thought you wanted me too, and I like you, so…”
Shaking your head, you sigh and let it out on an exasperated breath, pulling away from Sunghoon. You can’t help but think he’s said this exact thing to every other girl he’s ever fucked in his bed. “I don’t know, kinda... maybe? I’m just—I’m like, what? The flavor of the week? You’ll get bored and move on? It doesn’t feel good, Sunghoon.” As soon as the words come out of your mouth, you feel a different kind of shame wash over you, Soobin’s face in your mind as you realize you’ve done something similar to both of them. “Sorry, that’s not fair. You don’t owe me anything. Neither of you…”
Furrowing his brows at your words, especially the last, as your volume drops almost to a whisper, Sunghoon shifts closer to you and turns you towards him with both hands on your shoulders. “Could you fucking just talk to me? Not just assume shit? You aren’t the goddamn flavor of the week." Tilting his head, Sunghoon glances towards the sound of the party picking up downstairs as he licks his lips, his curiosity getting the better of him. “Wha—what do you mean, neither of you?”
Sunghoon’s eyes follow your eyes as you look away, avoiding his eyes. He knew that look; he had given it to other people, but he hadn’t been on the receiving end before. There was someone else besides him. Who else were you hooking up with? As soon as he asks the question in his head, the answer comes to him. There is only one answer. Soobin.
Nodding as if you had answered him yourself, Sunghoon chews at his cheek, sliding his hands along your arms, comforting you as he thinks of what to say or do, weighing his options. He could be mad. He could lash out at you for not telling him before the two of you did something, but you didn’t owe that to him. How serious were you and Soobin? From how you were acting and from what had happened between you and him, Sunghoon had to assume not very serious. So then that was something else to consider. He could ask you to tell Soobin to fuck off, or he could tell Soobin himself... But looking at your pretty face, Sunghoon could see the conflict written all over it. You liked Soobin. You liked him. You didn’t know what you wanted.
“Does he know?”
Shaking your head no, you blink back your tears, causing Sunghoon to move closer to you when he notices them. “Hey… none of that. Why are you crying? I’m not mad at you, baby.”
“I’m so shitty, Sunghoon. I—who does this? I like you.”
Nodding, Sunghoon sighs before pressing a kiss to your forehead as tears roll down your cheeks. “You aren’t shitty. It’s a shitty situation, but I’m not gonna flip my shit. Listen, I—he—” Sighing, Sunghoon groans at his own thoughts before leaning his head back in disbelief that he’s the one suggesting it. “Soobin is coming to the party tonight, right? Talk to him. We can talk it out and see what happens. Cool?”
He made it seem so easy, like they would just shake hands and choose a winner, like you were a prize. Blinking tears from your eyes, you shrug watching Sunghoon shake his head, his thumbs sliding over your cheeks to wipe away your tears. He wasn’t the pretentious fuckboy asshole everyone made him out to be after all.
“It’s worth trying, baby. I’m willing to see where it goes... for you.”
Sighing into the red solo cup in his hand, Soobin glances around the room, looking for a way out. He hadn’t seen you, and ironically, he hadn’t even seen Sunghoon. It wasn’t like he didn’t know anyone at the party, but this wasn’t his scene. The music was loud, smoke was making his nose feel funny, and he didn’t even like beer that much.
Soobin wasn’t sure why he had even agreed to this. You had probably ditched on it. He didn’t blame you if you had, but Sunghoon? It was his frat house. Surely he was around here somewhere.
Glancing towards the stairs, Soobin furrows his brows as he quickly glances away from a couple making out against the wall. That was probably the answer. Sunghoon probably had some poor, pathetic girl trapped in his bed already. Rolling his eyes, Soobin takes a big sip of his drink, starting to turn towards the front of the house when his eyes lock on to you and his stomach tightens with nerves. You were so fucking pretty. God, of course you always were... but it felt different now. You were like a beacon, so bright that it took a few seconds before it dawned on him that Sunghoon was standing behind you with his hand on your hip whispering in your ear.
It wasn’t fair for Soobin to be upset or jealous. It made sense that you were with Sunghoon. That had been the plan; you were going to meet up with him before the party and work on the project. So why was it making it hard to breathe seeing his hand on you like that? Why did it feel like you were slipping from his fingers and into Park Sunghoon’s arms?
Soobin downs the rest of his drink, making a sour face as he clenches his fist around the cup, and it crushes easily in his hand. He could give up, walk away, and find the door, but meeting your eyes and seeing the pretty smile on your face has him stuck where he is. There was no world where you were going to smile at him like that; he didn’t at least have a chance.
Glancing back at Sunghoon, you watch his brows lift in question before he nods his head towards Soobin as he leans down to speak next to your ear over the music. “He looks annoyed, but when isn’t he? I’ll be around; come find me in a bit.” Nodding, you slide your fingers over his on your hip, meeting Soobin’s eyes with a smile on your face.
“Hey.” You try to talk over the music, but your voice still sounds too small for the space that you are in, even as you move closer to Soobin. “I was—I hoped to find you. You know—that you’d come, you know, here—to the party.”
Furrowing his brows, Soobin still can’t stop how his lips pull up in a small smile hearing your voice even under the bass of the music. Leaning in a bit closer to you, he glancing behind you, trying to find Sunghoon, but is pleased not to see him lingering. “Well, I promised I would so—”
“You wanna maybe find somewhere quiet—” The words get cut off by a gasp when you feel your body being pushed towards Soobin’s as someone accidentally knocks into you. Lukewarm beer soaks into the front of your dress, drawing your eyes down to the wet stain starting to spread across your stomach. “Fuck…”
Soobin had started to nod along with your suggestion. He knew how the sentence ended; you wanted to find somewhere quieter to talk, or maybe something else, but then you had landed in his arms. Letting his eyes follow the girl who had bumped into you seemingly on accident, Soobin frowns when he sees her look back at you and laugh with her friends. It hadn’t been as much of an accident as it had seemed. This was why Soobin hated these sorts of parties. People who came to these things were all assholes. The people who threw these parties were even bigger assholes.
Taking the cup from your hand, he sighs under his breath as you pout down at your dress, stepping back to assess the damage. You would need to change, and you could feel your cheeks heating up even though no one was really paying that much attention to you; it felt like everyone’s eyes were on you.
Linking his fingers with yours, Soobin looks for a way out when you tug at his hand, pulling him towards the stairs. That would work. He wasn’t sure what you had in mind, but as long as he was with you, he didn’t care.
"Man, fuck off. You are too good at this.” Smirking at Heeseung’s complaint as he sinks another ping pong ball into a cup, Sunghoon’s attention is suddenly taken from the table in front of him and towards you as you guide Soobin up the steps. That hadn’t been discussed. He couldn’t help the lump that was forming in his throat at being left out. Tossing Heeseung the last ball in his hand, Sunghoon ignores his roommates questioning looks as he makes his way through the sea of people to follow you.
“Y/N, you okay?” Soobin could actually hear himself think on the second floor. The music was still loud, but at least the bass was at a dull thud instead of threatening to bust his eardrum.
Wiping your hand over the front of your dress, you lean back against the wall next to Sunghoon’s bedroom door, letting out a sigh. This wasn’t going how you had planned. You were starting to get a headache, and you smelled like stale beer. There was so much you wanted to say to Soobin as he looked at you with those big, puppy dog eyes... And now it was harder; the guilt was starting to wash over you again.
“I’m fine. It’s just a dress. I—Soobin…”
Furrowing his brows at your hesitation, Soobin takes a step towards you, resting his hand on your waist. He could feel the tension in the air. Something had changed, and now he felt like he had to do something, anything, to keep things in his favor. “What? Why do you look sad? Can’t stand it. What’s wrong, baby?”
Your hands move to hold Soobin’s biceps when he moves closer, pressing his body against yours. You know you should tell him to wait, to just stop until the two of you have really talked, but then he calls you baby, and all your hesitation melts away. Brushing your lips against his, you whimper Soobin’s name, feeling his knee slide between your legs, pinning you to the wall in the middle of the hall.
“You’re just needy? Maybe you missed me?”
Where had this Soobin come from? Meeting his eyes, you whine out a yes against his lips that barely rest over yours. There was something in his eyes that was different. His gaze was locked on you, intense—possessive, as his thigh pressed against you.
“In the middle of the hallway? And I didn’t even get an invite?”
Sunghoon’s voice brings you and Soobin out of your lust-filled haze and back to reality. You glance at him over Soobin’s shoulder, a small smile on your face. Soobin, on the other hand, clinches his teeth and lowers his head, feeling annoyance rush through him. “Of fucking course he’d show up.”
This had been one of the reasons you had wanted to talk to Soobin in the first place. This was your fault for not saying anything before things started to get out of hand with Soobin, but it was crazy how much both of them affected you. Sliding your hands along Soobin’s chest, you shake your head and meet his eyes as he tilts his head, obviously confused. “Don’t be like that, okay? I—see, I need to talk to you about something. Things happened, Binnie…”
Licking his lips, Soobin glances from you to Sunghoon over his shoulder before sighing out his words. “What things?”
“Things that maybe we can talk about in my room?”
Sunghoon was right. You had gotten caught up in the moment, but now that you were more aware of your surroundings, you could feel the embarrassment washing over you from how many people were walking through the hall to get to other rooms. Taking Soobin’s hand, you gesture with your head towards the door, hearing him sigh one more time before he gives in. Opening the door, he let’s Sunghoon follow behind, locking it.
“So, now does someone wanna fill me in on what I’m clearly missing?”
You could almost feel the frustration and hesitation radiating off of Soobin as his fingers trailed from yours. Following him with your eyes first, you pout at Sunghoon before moving towards Soobin, your fingers fidgeting with the end of your dress at your thigh. “I don’t want you to be mad at me or at Sunghoon—”
“Y/N, just tell me what the fuck happened.”
Slightly taken back by the tone of Soobin’s voice, you drop your dress from your fingers and sigh, lifting your hands and dropping them back at your sides. It wasn’t like you were dating either one of them. You hadn’t committed yourself to either one. You hadn’t done anything wrong.
“We did stuff, you know, like... together.” You weren’t really sure how to explain it. It wasn’t like you had fucked Sunghoon. You hadn’t fucked Soobin either, but either one could have ended up that way. “I—I like you, Soobin.”
Tilting his head at the second part of your explanation, Soobin’s mouth opens and then closes. He was a bit confused. You and Sunghoon had “done stuff together." What, like you had done stuff with him? Now you were telling him that you liked him? It felt like Soobin was on a rollercoaster, and he had just hit the top of a drop only to get stuck with that feeling of his stomach in his throat. “Explain that to me, Y/N, ‘cause... I don’t get it.”
Rolling his head, Sunghoon leans his head back, resting against his desk, as Soobin makes you explain yourself. It wasn’t that hard; he had figured it out so surely Soobin could do the same. “Seriously, dude? Put two and two toget—”
“Stay the fuck out of it, Sunghoon. I’m not talking to you yet.” Soobin hadn’t meant to sound as pissed as he did when he snapped at Sunghoon, but he was confused, and it wasn’t as easy as he was trying to make it out to be. At least it wasn’t to Soobin.
Holding his hands up, Sunghoon gives Soobin an impressed look before crossing his arms and shutting his mouth.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen, you know." Your voice had gotten small. The sound of it made both Soobin and Sunghoon’s stomach’s tighten; the urge to move to you and to make you feel better is strong, but both stayed where they were and let you speak. “I do like you. I like you both. I know that’s weird and it’s stupid. I have to figure it out... I didn’t mean to hurt anyone. I’m not like this. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” Shaking your head, you furrow your brows, glancing towards the door, your voice once again dropping in volume. “I should just go home and leave you guys alone.”
Watching you start to turn towards the door, your feet moving in that direction with that sad look on your face has Soobin headed towards you faster than he realized he could even move. With an arm wrapped around your waist, he pulls you back against his chest and rests his lips against your head, taking a deep breath of you unwilling to let you just go. “Stop it. I’m not—it’s not ideal, no, but I’m not mad. It’s confusing, yes, but I’m willing to figure it out with you.”
You close your eyes to the feeling of Soobin’s warm breath against you, his fingers pressing against your wet dress over your stomach as he keeps you against him. “And with Sunghoon?”
Groaning under his breath, Soobin glances towards the other man before wrapping his other arm around you and walking backwards towards the unmade bed sitting on it so you can rest on his lap. “Fuck, I guess so. Whatever this fucking means, I’ll figure out how to make it work.”
“You make it sound like I’m a bad date.” Pushing away from the desk, Sunghoon smirks at you and Soobin once he gets closer. “And for the record, I already said I’d make it work. I’m pretty good at sharing. Seems like I’m better at it than you, Soobin.”
Shaking his head, Soobin presses his lips to your neck, unable to stop himself when he hears you finally laugh, even if its at Sunghoon’s stupid attempt at a joke. He loved that sound—the sound of you happy. Happy looked good on you, and if he had his way, that’s how you’d always look. None of that pout on your lips like you had been just a few minutes ago. That shit had broken his heart and made him want to climb mountains to fix shit for you.
“Shut up, Sunghoon. You talk too fucking much.” Smiling against your neck, Soobin tests the waters by sliding his hands along your hips and down to your legs, feeling them part at his touch. “I can share... a bit, if that’s what you want me to do, pretty girl.”
Nodding, you slide your hands over Soobin’s, guiding them along your thighs and pushing your dress up as you turn your head towards his, capturing his lips between words. “Uh huh, share me, please?”
“Greedy little angel. One just isn’t enough?” Grinning at your shy reaction and how you tuck your face against Soobin’s neck, shaking your head no to answer his question, Sunghoon runs his fingers along your warm cheek. “That’s okay, baby, but I wanna know something. You never told me. What did you and Soobin do without me? ‘Cause I’m sure he wants to know what you and I did when we played earlier.”
That had Soobin’s attention. As jealous as he was that Sunghoon had touched you somehow, he was trying to give into it and make it work as you rocked your hips over his hardening cock. He was very curious what you and Sunghoon had been up to and why you were whining Sunghoon’s name as he chuckled your name in return, urging you to spill the details.
“Go on, baby girl. It’s a safe space with us, right, Soobin? We won’t judge our baby.”
Helping you spread your legs over his, Soobin nods along with Sunghoon’s words before trailing his fingers along your soft thighs. “I won’t judge you. Go ahead, sweetheart, tell him. I wanna know too.”
Shivering to Soobin’s light touch, you arch your back, managing to roll your hips down over Soobin’s lap once again, granting yourself a deep groan against your ear. “I—mmm, fuck. Soobin and I—we... I used my hand.” Whining softly, you meet Sunghoon’s eyes as he bites his lips, nodding for you to continue. “And against my—” Stopping short out of embarrassment, you glance back to Soobin, who smiles softly at you, leaning in to nudge his nose against yours.
“You teased me with your pussy, didn’t you, pretty? Got me so close but didn’t let me put my cock inside of you.” Soobin smiles against your lips when you shake your head, whining in protest that you weren’t teasing him. “Don’t lie to me. Don’t lie to us. You aren’t a fucking liar, Y/N. You’re a real slut when you really want it, and that’s okay, baby, ‘cause why?”
Stealing a kiss from Soobin, you lean your head back, moaning softly to the feeling of his lips against your throat and his fingers barely brushing over the center of your panties. “You touched me. You helped me too. Ah, Binnie… please? Do it again? Put them in?”
“That what he did? Binnie? Did Binnie fuck you with his fingers, princess?” Lifting his brow when you finally give him some attention, Sunghoon smirks at you, letting his eyes drop to Soobin’s fingers, brushing over the wet spot growing on your panties. “You give him a cute name, and yet while you were in my bed, I didn’t get any of that shit. I’m hurt—”
“No, ‘m sorry, I didn’t know if you’d like it. Hoonie?” Pouting at Sunghoon, you watch his smirk only get wider at the shortening of his name, his hand squeezing lightly over his obviously hard cock through his jeans as he watches Soobin finally pull your panties to the side.
“I do like it, baby. Now tell Soobin about our playtime together while you drip on his fingers.” Scoffing, Sunghoon runs his free hand over his mouth, realizing what he is saying and how lucky he is to be in this room with you and even Soobin. Nothing was going to compare to this. He was harder than he had ever been in his entire life, and he hadn’t even gotten a chance to touch you yet. It was almost enough watching another man’s fingers slide through your soft pussy lips and your thighs jerk in reaction.
“Yeah, okay. Ah!” Biting your lips, you nod, trying to focus as Soobin’s middle finger circles your clit slowly. “Hoonie ate me out, felt really good.”
Lifting his head towards Sunghoon, Soobin lifts his brow and rolls his eyes openly as Sunghoon grins at him. “Yeah? He made you feel good? He better. Did he make you cum with just his tongue, pretty girl?”
Trying to remember, you lean your head back on Soobin’s shoulder as you nod once again, pushing down towards his hand. “Mmhm, yeah. He’s good, his mouth. Oh my god, Binnie, more?”
“When I’m ready, little slut.” Soobin’s sweet voice against your ear sends shivers down your spine as his finger circles your wet hole. “What did you do for Hoonie since he was so good for you, hm?”
Grabbing Soobin’s forearm, you feel tears gathering on the rims of your eyes as he barely pushes his finger inside of you, rocking his finger back and forth patiently waiting for your answer. When the tears roll down your cheeks, Sunghoon tilts his head, taking another step towards you to push them away gently, making sure you are okay.
“He—oh… Uh, I—I sucked his cock, right? I did okay?” Meeting Sunghoon’s eyes, you find him smiling at you, his fingers lingering on your jaw when you finally speak up.
“Better than okay, angel. Never had someone go down on me like that before. The things your mouth can do…”
Soobin could feel the jealousy rising in him once again. Yes, he had gotten time with you; he had felt your skin against his, your pussy against his cock, his fingers inside of you like he was now, but Sunghoon had felt something different. Taking a breath to steady himself, Soobin nods against the side of your head. He breathes in the scent of your perfume and body wash, letting it wash over him and calm him down. He had promised to try to share.
Pushing his finger into you deeply, Soobin feels your body react, how your walls clench around him and how you try to roll your hips over even just a single finger to get more. “You got all of that today and you still want more? You’re still fucking yourself on my finger? What else do you want, huh? My cock?” Meeting Sunghoon’s eyes, Soobin almost challenges him before he smirks and sighs against your ear giving in. “Sunghoon’s cock?”
“Yes, yes... please? I need more. I’ve been so good for both of you, haven’t I?”
Sunghoon couldn’t argue against that and the look on Soobin’s face told him that he couldn’t either. Though Soobin was a bit less enthused with how this was starting and he was still getting the girl, there was some poetic justice buried deep in this tangled mess.
“Course you have, baby, but you gonna let me taste you? I don’t think it’s very fucking fair I haven’t gotten to. You can’t take anyone’s cock in this tight little hole if you aren’t stretched out a little anyway." Soobin hisses out the last of his words against your cheek as he adds a second finger, carefully working it into you beside the first feeling your warm, wet wall throb around them. “How are you gonna sit on my cock like this? You can barely take my fingers, pretty girl. You want my tongue too?”
Soobin’s dirty talk had you drooling and feeling dumb as you nodded along with everything he was saying. The sweet boy who had been ready to get on his hands and knees for you yesterday had you dripping like a common slut around his fingers today as Sunghoon watched curiously.
“If that’s what you want, princess, then get your ass up and sit with me. What isn’t fair is just watching. We are sharing, so let’s fucking share.” Sitting on the bed behind you and Soobin, Sunghoon rests his back against the headboard and pats his thighs as you and Soobin look back at him. “Won’t fuckin’ ask again. Fair is fair. You can get between her legs, Binnie.”
Biting at his tongue, Soobin slowly slides his fingers from you, listening to your pitiful whines as he does. When you stand up and move away from him, he wants to scream and pull you back, but he watches instead as Sunghoon grins at you, grabbing the end of your dress and sliding it up your legs.
“Good fuckin’ girl, Angel. You don’t need this anymore. I didn’t get to see anything, ‘cept your pretty little cunt earlier, huh? Let’s see all of you.”
Lifting your arms, you bite at your lips as Sunghoon helps you out of your now stained dress, leaving you in your unmatching bra and panties. Crossing your arms over your stomach, you glance down before you feel Sunghoon’s fingers on your chin lifting your head back up towards him so he can meet your eyes. "Uh, uh, none of that shit. You are perfect. Prettiest fucking girl I’ve ever had in my bed, swear to god. Come here…”
Long, skilled fingers make quick work of the clasp of your bra so that Sunghoon can work the straps down your arms, letting you drop the garment into the floor at your feet. You watch as he shakes his head, a smirk on his lips, his fingers walking the line of the top of your panties before he helps you slide them down and letting gravity do the rest.
“So pretty, baby.”
Soobin’s voice brings you back to the room. Your head had started to get cloudy with Sunghoon’s fingers tracing your skin, but that voice brought you back to reality. Meeting his eyes, you smile at Soobin as he stands up and pulls his shirt over his head, tossing it to the floor before quickly getting rid of his jeans and boxers, not leaving you the only one naked in the room.
Just like the day before, you can’t help when your eyes fall to Soobin’s cock. It surprises you again how big he is and how pre-cum is dripping from his tip as he puts his knee on the bed and reaches for you, pulling you towards him for a kiss as Sunghoon shifts to his knees undressing behind you.
It isn’t until you feel skin against your back that you realize that Sunghoon is naked too. Hands grip your hips and you feel his cock bump against your outer thigh as Sunghoon chuckles next to your ear, hearing your soft gasp. “What? You didn’t want my clothes off too? I can put them back—”
“No, oh my god, please don’t.” You knew that Sunghoon was teasing you. You knew that he wouldn’t get dressed again, but yet you felt like you had to beg him to stay like he was so that you could feel his firm chest against your back as his hands found your breasts and squeezed gently, bringing a moan from your throat and into Soobin’s mouth.
“So pretty, god, I love when you sound like that. Lean back against him, Y/N. I wanna taste you so bad.” There was the whine in Soobin’s voice that you had heard yesterday. He sounded desperate again and you were dripping down your thigh because of it as Sunghoon settled back against the headboard and let you rest between his legs with his cock against your back.
Patting your thighs, Sunghoon guides your legs over his and smiles against your neck when you do as you are told. “There you go, beautiful; give him some room to work.”
Soobin wants to tell Sunghoon he doesn’t need his help for this, but the moment he spreads your legs for him, that all dies on his tongue at the sight. He had seen you before, but this was different; Soobin could watch the slick drip from you and run towards the bed as you anticipated him. It all had his mouth watering, and he couldn’t wait anymore.
Sliding down in the bed, his face level with your pussy, Soobin groans as he uses his thumbs to pull your folds apart, watching how they try to stick together from how wet you are. With one last glance up at you, Soobin closes the gap and flattens his tongue against you letting you feel the drag from your ass to your clit in one slow, smooth movement. “Fuck this pussy..." Soobin wasn’t even sure what he was saying; all he knew was heaven was between your legs and he was tasting it. With each pass of his tongue through your folds, he lets his nose nudge against your clit before getting frustrated when his glasses bump against your thigh, causing him to growl into each groan.
For you seeing Soobin between your legs, his glasses fogging up as he ate you like his last meal was a wet dream come true. You could almost see yourself covering his glasses with your cum, but after a few minutes, Soobin takes that from you when he angrily rips them from his face, putting them on the bed, making you whine out a no and making Sunghoon laugh behind you.
“I’m sorry, baby. Are you mad, Soobin isn’t fucking you with his tongue and keeping his glasses on?” Tsking as you try to turn your face from him, Sunghoon uses one hand to turn your face back towards him as he reaches for Soobin’s discarded glasses with the other carefully putting them on himself, lifting his brows at how strong the prescription turns out to be. “You’ve got some interesting kinks, princess. Tell me, you want to fuck me harder now that I’m wearing them?”
Moving your eyes over Sunghoon’s face, you can’t help but moan even louder when Soobin pushes his tongue into you, his thumb on your clit massaging it in tight circles. There was no way you could lie your way out of this so you just nodded instead.
“What a little slut we have on our hands, Soobin.” Pushing the glasses up to the top of his head, his soft hair pushed back under them, Sunghoon smirks at you as your eyes follow his every move with the glasses. “Don’t you worry about them, baby girl. I’ll keep them safe right here. Why don’t you cum on his tongue like a good girl?”
Glancing up at you and Sunghoon, Soobin groans against your folds before turning his attention fully back to you, as if demanding that you follow through with what Sunghoon is asking you to do. If Soobin had his way, you wouldn’t be cumming on anyone else’s tongue besides his. He would even keep it from Sunghoon if he could. But looking up the length of your body and feeling your hips roll against his tongue, Soobin knew that wasn’t going to happen. You were enjoying being between them both too much and he was getting off on it more than he would be willing to admit out loud.
“Good fucking girl.” Chuckling against the shell of your ear, Sunghoon traces each of your nipples, feeling you arch against his chest. You were driving him crazy and it was making his cock throb to have you rocking your body against his as Soobin ate you out like someone who hadn’t eaten in weeks. He knew you were sweet—the best thing he had even tasted, but there was something feral about how Soobin was almost growling possessively between your legs as he licked up every last drop of your cum. It was impressive.
“You got his face messy, Princess. The things we’d do for you. Look at that... " Fingers grip your chin tightly as Sunghoon tilts your head down so you can watch Soobin kiss your thighs, finally moving away from your pussy. “Face that has graced our university’s prestigious little newsletter so many fucking times because he’s some goody two shoes—” Smirking, Sunghoon meets Soobin’s eyes as he narrows his eyes back up at him from between your legs. “All covered in a pretty girl’s cum.”
“Shut the fuck up, Sunghoon, and move. I’m fucking her first.”
Sunghoon slides his hands to your waist and shakes his head as he nuzzles his nose against your neck, listening to you whine out a soft moan. You were so gone, just a dumb little fuck toy for them to play with at this point that it didn’t even matter, but it mattered to him. “No. Why the hell do you get to go first? You already got to go first—”
Lifting your head, you lick your lips and force yourself to focus on Sunghoon and Soobin arguing. It was ridiculous and just like when the group project had begun, no one seemed to care what you thought—until you spoke up. “Why can’t I choose? It is me you’re fucking.”
That was a good point and it caused both men to stop bickering immediately. Hands trail along your sides as Sunghoon nods along with you, his lips finding your ear as he kisses it gently. Soobin also nods, his fingers lifting yours towards his wet lips for a lingering kiss on your knuckles as he tries to wait patiently, hoping you’ll make the right decision.
“I—” Now that you had their attention and the ball in your court, it was scary and overwhelming. Soobin’s cock was right in front of you, thick and enticing you to climb into his lap while Sunghoon’s pressed against your back, leaking on to your skin, reminding you that you could so easily let him ease you on to it. Thinking was hard, but after a moment you just sigh into a pout and meet Soobin’s eyes, making him tilt his head like a question. “Can I have both? Is that too greedy?”
It was incredibly greedy, but it made Sunghoon’s lips pull up into a full smile as he held you closer to him. “That what you want? You want to be full?”
The words cause your face to heat up instantly when you remember how good at dirty talk Sunghoon is. Nothing seemed to really phase him; he would just say what he wanted to and get it—just like now as you nod, turning your head to meet his eyes even with your face so close to his.
“Fuck…” Soobin could feel his cock jerk involuntarily against his thigh at your words and the way you were shyly looking at Sunghoon. He had never done this before, but for you, he’d figure it out. From how Sunghoon was acting, this wasn’t his first rodeo and that somehow made perfect sense. If this had been any other day, Soobin might have been more annoyed. He probably would have made some comment about how much of a whore Sunghoon was, but right now he was grateful for his experience as he ushered you into Soobin’s arms and sighed.
“What—” Closing his eyes as you wrap your arms around his neck, Soobin groans, feeling you slide over his thigh. Your warm, wet pussy gliding over his skin almost scrambles his brain as he tries to keep his wits about him and ask logical questions. “Pretty girl, you’re killing me.” Scooting along the bed with you to where Sunghoon once was, Soobin rests against the headboard, letting you rock your hips over his thigh. Holding your hips, he glances from you towards where Sunghoon searches through the nightstand beside the bed on the other side of the room. “The fuck are you looking for?”
Making a triumphant sound as he holds up a small bottle of lube and a couple of condoms, Sunghoon glances back towards you and Soobin before letting out a low groan at the sight. “Baby… I was hurrying. So fucking desperate you are trying to get off on his thigh like a cat in heat?” Dropping the items on the bed beside you, Sunghoon leans to kiss your shoulder before groaning in disbelief as you lean your head back and rest your hands on Soobin’s shoulder for stability, trying hard to get yourself off as he looks down at you. “Our pretty little needy slut. You want me to fuck your ass? Huh? Yeah, well, you are gonna have to let me prep it first or it’s gonna hurt too much.”
Suddenly your hips come to a stop, your orgasm lingering on the edge as Sunghoon slaps your hip. You watch him offer one of the condoms to Soobin as he puts the other between his teeth, ripping the foil open with ease. With one small shuddered groan, Sunghoon manages to roll the condom on and turns his attention back to the bottle of lube.
“Be gentle with her. Be still, baby.” Cooing into his words, Soobin runs his fingers along your cheek to your hairline, never taking his eyes off you. He hadn’t minded feeling you grind on his thigh, but he could understand why Sunghoon wanted you to be still. He didn’t want any of this to hurt you. He was glad it seemed that he was going to be the one who was going to be in your pussy; the idea of doing anything else made Soobin’s anxiety spike. He had been told enough times that his cock was big, including by you, but he wasn’t ready to try to figure out the logistics of what Sunghoon was doing.
“Yeah, be still, baby. Hoonie is trying to work... Sit up on your knees for me, Princess; let me see that ass. Fuck…” This wasn’t something that Sunghoon had done often. None of these supplies were his, but the person he was borrowing from had invited him to participate in a couple threesomes and he had watched it being done. Warming the lube between his fingers, Sunghoon rests his free hand on your ass before he carefully drags his lubed fingers over your tight hole, watching it clench. “Relax.”
That was easier said than done, but taking a deep breath, you nod and lean your forehead on Soobin’s shoulder, arching your back to let yourself give into the experience. The first finger up to Sunghoon’s knuckle has you digging your toes into the bedding as your breath caught in your throat until he eases his finger in more, letting more of the cold lube run between your ass and over his fingers with each slow movement.
“Okay, Angel?”
“Mmhm. Feels weird, but I like it.”
Sunghoon could tell you were already pushing your hips back towards his finger after just a couple minutes of him letting you get used to one. “Want another? And how ‘bout a distraction?”
Nodding quickly to both, you glance over your shoulder to Sunghoon, finding him smirking at you. “Yeah, Hoonie, please? I’m—it feels good, but I’m empty. I want something. I wanna do something.”
Soobin furrows his brows and leans his head to the side to watch Sunghoon’s fingers as he holds your ass firmly with one hand and slides his finger out almost all the way before putting them together and slowly pushing them back in. The sound that comes out of your mouth is enough to make Soobin wish he were already inside of you or that he prayed more often.
“That’s it… You are so tight, beautiful. Gotta stretch you out, huh?” Nodding towards Soobin, Sunghoon keeps his brows furrowed in concentration as you dig your nails into Soobin’s shoulders. “You have a perfect distraction in front of you, Princess. Mark him up, make him pretty. The other girls around campus won’t know what the fuck happened when Choi Soobin shows up on Monday.”
Whining under his breath, Soobin meets Sunghoon’s eyes before glancing down into yours as you smile at him. He wasn’t against it, but it wasn’t the other girls he was concerned about. He had classes and professors who looked at him like he was going to be part of leading the next generation on the business front, and he couldn’t really be covered in hickies. “I—just nothing visible—”
“Yes visible. Baby, let them see who you own. Fuck that. You want us both, right? I’d be proud to wear them. You aren’t proud, Binnie?
With his eyes darkening with a challenge, Soobin grits his teeth before baring his neck for you. This wasn’t how he was going to lose to Sunghoon. He wasn’t going to prove he was more worthy of you just because he was more willing to display that he had been in bed with you. That was ridiculous; Soobin wasn’t ashamed of it… He’d gladly take anything you gave him, no matter who saw the lingering marks—classmates, professors, or his parents.
Running your fingers along Soobin’s neck, you whimper under your breath as Sunghoon’s fingers scissor into you slowly. It was tempting to mark Soobin and to leave him ruined for anyone else. You wanted to do it to both of them. You did want both of them. You perhaps didn’t know how much you wanted it until Sunghoon said it and then you couldn’t help yourself.
At first you simply press a kiss to Soobin’s neck, enjoying the soft groan that spills from his lips, but quickly the kisses turn into bites as you suck on his skin, which has him holding on to you tightly. With each deep thrust of Sunghoon’s fingers, another finger added, lust drips from you and finds its way to Soobin as you moan against his skin, making him yours.
Feeling his third finger moving with a bit more ease inside of you, Sunghoon smirks when you start to pant into your moans against Soobin’s throat. He could see the red splotches covering the other man’s skin and he couldn’t lie to himself and say he didn’t want that for himself. He wanted you to mark him as much as he wanted to mark you. He wanted to ruin you for anyone else besides him. The only fucking person he would ever let touch you again would be Soobin and that was only because it’s what you wanted.
“Gonna cum? From me fingering your ass? My dirty little princess is full of surprises.” Sunghoon listens to you sob out a moan when his fingers slip from you and leave you empty and right on the edge of your orgasm, once again edging you. “I love when you cry like that, Angel. I’d rather you cum on a cock. You wanted them so bad, you’ve made Soobin wait... sit on it.”
That was music to Soobin’s ears. His skin was on fire and he was starting to be afraid he was going to cum from just your mouth on his neck. Leaning his head back for a deep breath, Soobin licks his lips and focuses his eyes on you. “Ready, baby?” Sliding his hand to your hip, he strokes his cock from tip to base one time with the other, keeping himself in place for you.
“Mhm, please? Sunghoon is being bossy.”
Your voice is quiet and teasing, but just loud enough for Soobin to hear, making him laugh. Nodding along with you, he starts to speak to tell you that you are right, when all words die on his tongue as you slide your hips forward and over his shaft and fingers much like you had the day before.
“Don’t tease me, Y/N.”
You could tell that Soobin was being serious, and yet it was too tempting to keep teasing him. You almost wanted to see what would happen if you kept teasing him. In your mind, you could picture him throwing you down on the bed and fucking you hard and fast. Every scenario in your mind had you dripping over and more over his fingers and cock so when he does finally snap, growling your name, you barely have time to react.
“I said don’t fucking tease me. You want to be bossed around, little slut?” Fingers dig into your hip as Soobin pulls you against his chest and nudges his cock into your entrance, lowering you down over him carefully. “You want me to just use you like a toy?”
“You know she does. She’s pushing your buttons for a reason, Soobin.” Knocking one of Soobin’s legs to the side, Sunghoon moves to his knees behind you as he strokes his cock, his hand covered in the same lube he had used to prep you. “Just wants her little holes filled up so she doesn’t have to think, right princess?”
Sunghoon waits until Soobin has you settled completely on his cock before he repeats the process he had with his finger with the head of his cock. He watches how you clench around nothing before he painstakingly eases himself into you, letting you adjust and fall forward towards Soobin.
There are no words spoken at first, only moans and deep breaths, as each one of you has to focus on not letting go in that exact moment. You feel overwhelmingly full and Sunghoon and Soobin struggle with how tight you suddenly are and how even without moving they can almost feel each other inside of you, making their head’s spin with how different it is.
“Shit… Someone’s gotta move. She’s too tight. I’m gonna cum if we don't.”
Nodding along with Sunghoon’s pleas, Soobin holds your hips steady as he makes the first move, rocking his hips up towards yours. A chorus of moans fills his ears, including his own, causing him to repeat the motion only deeper and harder than the first.
Sunghoon rests his head forward on your shoulder, letting Soobin move you over him like a toy. He knew he should be trying to do more, but you felt so tight around his cock that he felt like he was going to explode at any moment. You sounded too good and the entire experience was too good; he shouldn’t be enjoying this as much as he was—but he was just letting himself go.
You were too far gone. You were full and the moment that Soobin started to move, that was it. There were no more thoughts that could ever enter your mind. There were only Soobin and Sunghoon. You didn’t need anything else to survive. No water or food would ever sustain you like they would. Only being in their arms, having them in your life, or them making you feel this good could keep you alive.
No one had to tell Soobin or Sunghoon that you were going to cum. You weren’t saying any words that made sense at this point, only whines and their names, but they didn’t need words to tell them what was coming. Your body was telling them everything. Even though Sunghoon wasn’t the one you were cumming around, it didn’t matter; he could feel it. You were tighter and it took him over the edge with you so quick that he didn’t have time to catch his breath.
Soobin tried to commit the moment to memory for the rest of his life as if this would never happen again. The feeling of your soft walls closing on his cock as he buried himself completely inside of you, only to feel how you didn’t want to let him go when your orgasm ripped through you. Nothing about how his own climax followed suit was elegant, but it was something he would remember as Soobin groaned your name loudly and thrust into you hard and fast, hearing not only you but Sunghoon say his name when he came hard.
You weren’t sure who moved you or cleaned you up, but it wasn’t until the sun was peeking through the window the next morning that you realized that you were still in Sunghoon’s room. Lifting your head, you furrow your brows, feeling an arm over your stomach and legs tangled with yours.
On one side of you, Sunghoon had his cheek squished into a pillow of a bed that he and Soobin had apparently pushed together with his in order to make a bed big enough for the three of you to sleep in. On the other side, Soobin lay on his back, arm over his eyes, letting you get a clear view of your art work beginning to bloom along his neck.
Glancing down, you bring the shirt covering your upper half to your nose, realizing you don’t recognize it but it must be one of Sunghoon’s. They had even taken time to dress you after you passed out. Your body was sore; you felt like you could lay back down between them and sleep the day away, but then your mind starts to wander and the confusion and shame starts to seep in, causing you to look for the emergency exit as you wiggle from under the sheet, trying not to wake either of them.
“Where are you going, baby?” Peeking under his arm as you struggle with the sheet tangled around your foot near Sunghoon, Soobin yawns under his breath before stretching. You were even cuter this morning. God, he was screwed when it came to you. He had never cooperated so much with Sunghoon in his life as he did when you had fallen asleep and they had to clean you up. Reaching for his glasses, Soobin pushes them up his nose and rocks his neck back and forth as he sits up, watching you settle on your knees in the middle of the bed, realizing you had gotten caught.
“Um… nowhere?”
“Liar… You moved my covers. It’s cold. Can’t you lie to me from under the covers, Princess? Come back to bed.” Sunghoon’s voice is whiny and makes your heart tighten as he reaches blindly towards you, his fingertips running over your knee before resting on your leg as he yawns.
“I think—I thought maybe I should go home. Let you guys do whatever it is you do—”
“Ouch. The walk of shame?” Sighing louder, Sunghoon turns on his back, exasperated that you had made him get out from under the covers and look at you.
Opening your mouth and closing it a few times, you shake your head before looking down in defeat and nodding while shrugging. “I guess so. It was just sex, right? So I just need to bite the bullet and put on my big girl pants and get over it.”
Looking around in confusion, Soobin runs his fingers through his hair before Sunghoon laughs and sits up, putting his face in his hands, still laughing as you whine his name embarrassed.
“It’s not funny, Sunghoon! Oh my god… Why are you making fun of me now? Was I that much of a joke—”
Reaching out for your arm, Sunghoon pulls you back towards the top of the bed where he and Soobin are, causing you to gasp in surprise by being forced to move so suddenly. “I am making fun of you, idiot. You aren’t a joke, but this is some kind of joke if you think you are still the flavor of the week. I already told you that I like you. I don’t pass that out like currency, Y/N.” When you wiggle in his arms, Sunghoon rolls his eyes and looks down at you annoyed before looking at Soobin for help.
“We said we’d figure it out, Y/N. Don’t you want to?” Shifting a bit closer on the bed, Soobin holds your chin between his thumb and forefinger, making you look at him. “I don’t sleep around and I don’t do this. I don’t have threesomes, especially with—” Letting out a sigh, realizing he doesn’t want to fight with Sunghoon or push his buttons, despite their past relationship, Soobin tilts his head and leans down to push his lips against yours as you rest against Sunghoon’s chest. “Wanna give it a try?”
You must still be asleep. This must be a weird, fucked up, wet dream that you were going to wake up from. Opening your eyes, you glance down at your arm before pinching it and wincing loudly, causing both Sunghoon and Soobin to laugh in disbelief. “I’m not dreaming.”
"No, you idiot... God, you are so cute.” It was Sunghoon’s turn to kiss you; if you thought you were dreaming, he wanted to help you realize you weren’t and it wasn’t fair that Soobin had already gotten a kiss and he hadn’t. Letting his lips linger on yours, Sunghoon lets his fingers fall from your jaw and watches you open your eyes once more, your chest rising and falling quickly as you seem to realize it’s all real and you nod.
“Two boyfriends is a pretty good deal, Princess. We are both smart, handsome, and wealthy. We’d spoil—”
Loud knocking at the door makes you jump against Sunghoon and Soobin’s arms before you all hear a loud sigh and a pleading voice. “Just tell them yes and get the fuck out of my room. I need to get some clothes and take a shower!”
Wincing at Heeseung’s voice, Sunghoon gives you a strained smile before looking around the room and back at the door. “Can—hey Hee? Can you give us like an hour?”
“No! Fuck, no man!”
More insistent knocking makes you wince and recoil in the bed as Sunghoon slips out from one side and mutters under his breath towards Soobin. “We gotta move his bed back and don’t fuckin’ mention I used his shit from his nightstand. He’s sensitive about that shit.” Looking back at you, Sunghoon winks and waves his hand towards you to get you moving. “Up, princess. Heeseung’s being a little bitch. We have to move our beautiful moment.”
“Sunghoon, you’re the bitch. What’s that sound? Did you move my bed again?”
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#enhypen smut#txt smut#sunghoon smut#soobin smut#svthub#enhypen angst#txt angst#sunghoon angst#soobin angst#enhypen fluff#txt fluff#sunghoon fluff#soobin fluff#enhypen comedy#txt comedy
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hell bent | yoon jeonghan
› pairings: yoon jeonghan x female reader › aus: demon hunter jeonghan, supernatural au, demon reader › genres: angst, fluff, smut (18+) › word count: 12.7k
› 🎧: this man – jxw
› special thanks to @gyuswhore who helped me proofreading this 🩵
› this is part 4 of the curse - hannieween fest
› warnings after the cut! READ THEM CAREFULLY 🗣️
› warnings: hurt/comfort! major character death scene (it's not described in great detail), resurrection, grief, injury, blood, alcohol consumption, smut with plot, sex dreams, unprotected p in v, creampie and pull-out method, corruption kink, exhibitionism, love making, jeonghan is down bad, breeding kink, oral sex, pussy drunk jeonghan, buff jeonghan. pet names: baby (hers)
› disclaimer: minors dni this post is intended for 18+ readers. have your age stated in your description and try not to look like a bot please 🙂
hell bent
JEONGHAN SAT ON THE GROUND FOR WHAT FELT LIKE AN ETERNITY. He stared at the horizon until the darkness dissolved and the sun rose. The weight in his arms increased as the seconds went by until he grew numb and cold in the morning mist.
He blinked when the sunlight started to hurt his eyes. His throat was sore and dry from screaming, and his fists were bloody. But that did not matter. All that mattered was gone. He looked down where you lay motionless in his arms. Cold and bloody.
Hours had dragged on, and the time to move was drawing near. But he feared that if he moved, reality would set in. He cupped your cheek, kissing your forehead before pressing his own on yours, and waited. He waited for you to open your eyes, to feel your take in a breath.
It was over.
He got up, carrying your limp body in his arms. Once on his feet, the weight of your body caused a deep blow to his chest.
You laid on the backseat of his car as he drove aimlessly until he found a place deserted enough to hide. A place to bury your body.
The hole he dug in the ground was surrounded by trees, small patches of grass that grew small flowers attracting butterflies in, and in the distance, he could hear the chirping of birds. You looked peacefully asleep once he laid you there.
It was over. The torture was over. The pain, the suffering, all of that. And for a small moment, he thought you were smiling.
When Jeonghan stumbled upon the headquarters, he did not even bother knocking, because they saw his car parked on the driveway of the old manor.
Seungcheol opened the door, a bewildered look on his face, mouth parted, brows drawn inward. “What happened to you?” he asked, stepping aside to let Jeonghan in.
Jeonghan hugged his arm to his body. “Is Joshua here?” he asked instead, hurrying to the hospital wing of the manor.
“What’s happening?” Joshua raised his head, standing up from the desk pushed to the far end of the long room. His gaze fell on Jeonghan and got to work in an instant. “Sit,” he motioned to one of the beds.
Jeonghan obliged, letting out a pained groan as he sat down. “I need a favor,” he forced out, sitting still as Joshua grabbed a pair of scissors, cutting through Jeonghan’s zipper hoodie to reveal the deep cut from the shoulder to the elbow.
“Tell me what happened to you,” Joshua asked softly, it sounded like a routine question. But Jeonghan knew it was genuine curiosity. Joshua sat down on a stool beside the bed, examining all the damage done.
“Seungcheol,” Jeonghan muttered. “I need you to do something for me.”
Seungcheol stood before the bed, placing his hands on his hips. “I’m listening.”
Jeonghan took in a breath, mustering the courage to speak as pain throbbed inside him. “In the outskirts of Veridian Bay, some three kilometres south, are three dead hunters.”
“Shit,” he hissed. “Demons? Were you with them?”
Jeonghan shook his head, swallowing hard. “I killed them.”
Both Joshua and Seungcheol stopped dead in their tracks. Hunter deaths were common, and they were just reported, families were contacted in some cases. But most of the time, they went unnoticed. But hunters killing other hunters was something out of the ordinary.
“Jeonghan, what happened?” Joshua asked slowly and with a tone laced with concern.
Jeonghan shuddered, shaking his head again. “I can’t,” he choked out. “I just need that taken care of. I couldn’t go back to get them.”
Seungcheol ran a palm on his face, and Jeonghan knew he would not let this go easily. But he just nodded and turned around to strut out of the hospital wing. “Consider it done.”
Jeonghan and Joshua waited quietly, sitting very still until the loud noise of the front door slamming shut announced that they were alone. In the distance, the roar of Seungcheol’s bike echoed throughout the clear of the vicinity, growing more and more distant as he drove away.
Joshua continued working, cleaning the wound on Jeonghan’s arm, sending glances to his face to both measure how much painJeonghan was experiencing and to wait for him to talk.
“They killed her,” Jeonghan croaked, closing his eyes as a painful shudder swarmed inside him, threatening to break his mind.
“The hunters?” Joshua murmured.
“They came for her, I couldn’t do anything. She was gone before I could get to her,” he whispered, his face contorting in pain from the first puncturing of the needle stitching his skin back together, and the image of you lying on the ground.
“It has been months since we last talked, Jeonghan,” Joshua mentioned, carefully closing one stitch. “What changed?”
Jeonghan shook his head, refusing to open his eyes. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.”
“Try me,” Joshua replied, his gentle tone easing some of the anxiousness in Jeonghan’s mind.
Jeonghan opened his eyes, finding his best friend sitting beside him. “Do you know anything about bonds?” he asked, waiting until Joshua nodded reluctantly. “Pacts, deals, promises… everything we were taught in training, you know that they are binding contracts with demons.”
Joshua frowned. “Did you make a pact with her?” he asked knowingly.
“Much worse,” Jeonghan replied, adding an empty smile that felt crazy to him. “She was bound to me and I to her since we were born.”
Joshua blinked a couple of times, tilting his head to one side and lowering his medical tools just a little. His gaze glided over the features of Jeonghan’s weary and dirty face, waiting for him to elaborate.
“You know,” Jeonghan asserted once his best friend remained quiet. “Did you know about this?”
Joshua sent his gaze upward, outlining the corners of the room pensively. “I’m never on the field, not like you and Seungcheol. I stay here, I patch all of you up and in the meantime, I hear the stories you bring from out there.”
“Please get to the point,” Jeonghan gritted, bracing himself for more physical pain as Joshua resumed stitching his arm up.
“I’ve heard stories, yeah,” Joshua mumbled, carefully adding another stitch. “When you told me about her, I just wondered about it. But you never showed up again, so I couldn’t tell you anything.”
Jeonghan sighed in resignation. “She is my soulmate,” he said, the word coming out with enough weight to make his heart protest in pain.
“How do you feel?” Joshua pulled back to take a surveying look.
“I buried her… She’s gone,” Jeonghan mumbled dejectedly, his gaze falling out of focus, lost in the distance. “She’s gone.”
The small patches of flowers surrounding the place where you lay, would they grow over you? Do you like flowers?
“Sounds like you cared about her,” Joshua whispered, finishing up the last stitch.
“Everything happened so fast,” Jeonghan went on, swallowing his tears. “I couldn’t get to her in time. I felt her pain. I felt the last beating of her heart.”
Joshua stopped, the pause was minimal, but it meant something. “You felt it?”
Jeonghan nodded in sharp, but tiny motions. “They tried to cut her wings,” he whispered in a near-crazed look flashing his eyes. Jeonghan was lost in the memory, trying to retrace every move he made upon finding you, but he could not remember what he did to those hunters.
“Jeonghan, what do you mean you felt it?” Joshua pressed, his tone more urgent and Jeonghan could tell that his friend was worried about him.
“The bond. We can sense each other through it,” he said, his voice breaking halfway through the sentence.
“But not anymore?” Joshua prodded, his tone gentle and cautious, fearing that his friend might be losing touch with reality.
“Not anymore,” Jeonghan breathed in, his chest stammering as he suppressed a sob, tears welling up in his eyes.
“And the bond?” Joshua lifted his gaze from the work he was doing, his tone rose in worry.
“It’s still there,” Jeonghan sniffled, crestfallen as tears rolled down his cheeks. “It’s still calling me to her, there’s just no receiving end.”
Joshua left his tools on the cart beside him, discarding the rags filthy with blood. He let out a heavy sigh, his shoulders going slack. “I’m so sorry for your loss,” he muttered, gently patting Jeonghan’s back, then bringing his hand to the back of his head, caressing as if to soothe him.
But there was nothing that could ever soothe Jeonghan’s pain. The emptiness inside him seemed to ache at its edges, his mind felt shaken with the reality he was thrust into. It seemed insane that it had been hours since he kissed you, eager with the prospect of starting fresh with you.
And now you were gone.
There was no point in cursing at life’s way to mock him anymore. Jeonghan thought this was the way he was paying for all the times he neglected you, all the times he hurt you. But the selfish part in him wished that life had given him the opportunity to say goodbye to you.
Jeonghan’s heart broke the night he lost you.
Despite everything that happened, he tried to move on. He convinced himself that life still went on and that you would have wanted him to move forward.
He kept your memory alive through small things. Some mornings he would go to a diner and order pancakes with syrup and bacon. When he was alone in his room, he would pretend you were there with him. He would imagine hearing your laugh, the small sounds you made when you slept.
It was the first month since you were gone. Jeonghan never had the opportunity to know what your favorite flowers were if you even liked receiving flowers. So he routinely left a different bouquet of flowers on the grave he made for you. He left lilies, the first time he went to visit you, one hand holding the bouquet, the other holding a bottle of rum.
He sat on the ground, leaning back against the trunk of a tree. The clear was quiet and dense with humidity, his senses stimulated by the smell of wet grass and dirt.
There was a peace that filled the emptiness inside him as he sat beside your grave. As though the bond could rest easy once he was there, even though there was no response from you.
Jeonghan grabbed the bottle with one hand around its neck and tipped a generous amount of rum in his mouth. Exhaling harshly, he wiped his chin with the back of his hand. “At least we have our answer, eh?” Jeonghan muttered glumly.
The next time he went there, some three weeks later, he brought you petunias. He thought that they would look good along with the wild chamomiles that were growing around you. This time he realized that he did not bring a bottle with him, and he did not need it. He just sat there, content with the peace that being near you brought him.
The third month you laid there, he brought you peonies. This time, he bought them with the memory of your glinting eyes the last and only time he saw you with joy and love glowing all around you.
He stood before the grave with his hands inside his pockets, looking at the ground adorned with flowers. “I don’t even know if you liked flowers,” he said, an empty smile curving his lips. “But I don’t know what else people leave on graves.”
With a tired sigh, he sat down on the ground, tucking his legs in a butterfly position. His fingers toyed with the grass growing in patches beneath him. The stillness of the clearing offered him the moment for reflection; he ventured again with questions about you. He never wondered about what the afterlife would look like, but sometimes he liked to think that there was some preternatural way you could listen to him.
“Shua saw me with flowers this morning,” he said, chuckling awkwardly. “He said nothing, just told me to come back before sundown. I think he’s known for a while that I come here to visit you.” He raised his gaze, finding the sunlight filtering through the thicket of the trees, bathing him. “He’s a good friend, I think you would like him.”
Jeonghan lowered his gaze to the flowers sitting on the ground. He propped one elbow on his knee, resting his chin on his fist. “I almost didn’t come here this time,” he muttered guiltily, filling his chest with air to try to push the ache inside him.
It was as though the mere thought of not coming here to visit you made the bond protest. When you were alive, it was the mad craving for you that did not allow him to stay away for long. Now, it was just a thing that pulsated inside him, calling for you.
He breathed in, filling his lungs with the humid air of the quiet forest, trying to gulp down the knot coiling around his throat. “I miss you,” he whispered to the ground, his eyes brimming with hot tears. “I wish I could go back and do things differently with you… I wish I hadn’t been so stupid.”
He stood up, dusting the dirt from his hands while contemplating whether he wanted to say goodbye to you or not. Instead, he turned and walked away from the clear, enjoying the chirping of the birds keeping you company as he returned home.
Jeonghan returned to the manor, where he had been living since that night. The smell of food distracted him before he went to his designated room, so he just walked to the kitchen, finding Joshua busy preparing dinner.
“You’re back,” Joshua muttered gently, but the look he sent was weary. “I thought you’d be gone for longer.”
“There was not much to do,” he muttered offhandedly.
Joshua set a plate on the small dining table motioning to Jeonghan to the chair. “That’s for you,” he said.
“Thanks,” Jeonghan replied, sitting down with a tired groan. He kept an eye on his friend, pacing around the kitchen of the old manor. “What’s up with you?”
“Just thinking,” Joshua muttered, serving a plate for himself, and sat down in front of Jeonghan, occupying a space on the table too. “Ever tried summoning her?”
Jeonghan’s eyes went wide, his heart stammering for a split second. “What?” he choked out.
Joshua took the fork into his mouth and nodded, munching his food with ease, as though he was having the most normal conversation on the planet. “Have you ever tried summoning her?” he repeated slowly.
“No,” he replied, his tone coming out like a question.
“Mmm, I see,” he said, taking his cup to drink with long and generous gulps.
“Why?” Jeonghan asked, but his friend kept drinking.
Joshua shrugged. “I just thought that you might’ve tried it at least once.”
“Why would I do that?” Jeonghan frowned, the ache palpitating strongly in his chest. “She’s gone.”
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to bring it up like that,” Joshua replied, lowering his gaze in shame.
You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, leaning your cheek against the side of his head. The sighs slowly turned into moans, spilling out of your lips relentlessly as you rolled your hips on him, fucking him slowly. “Jeonghan,” your voice called.
“I know, baby,” he replied, enjoying the feeling he got whenever he was with you, it was bright and alive and dancing on his skin. “I feel it too,” he whispered.
You moved your hands to cup his face, pressing a hard kiss on his lips as you started moving your hips on him faster. “I love you,” you breathed.
Jeonghan moaned, wrapping you with his arms to flip the positions on the bed, pressing your body against the mattress. “I love you,” he replied, a shudder overpowering him, making him utter your name, over and over as he made love to you.
He pressed his body against the hard mattress, calling your name again as he woke up violently with an exasperated sigh. Rubbing his hands against his face, he shook himself from the merciless dream he had of you. “Gods,” he choked out, covering his face in shame, breathing hard against his hands. “Fuck, fuck!”
The hole in his chest pulsated painfully, desperately calling out to you to no end. As he closed his eyes, gathering himself, he saw you in the eye of his mind. Your sweet smile, every curve of your body.
It seemed a true tragedy that he could feel you in his dreams only. He felt your skin, he felt the bond responding to you the way it used to when you were alive. It was the first time he dreamed of you since you left, and he suspected it would not be the last.
This was his burden to bear. And he would have to endure it.
When Jeonghan first met you, he could not make sense of the pull he felt. His surroundings warped and everything focused on you, on your face, your eyes, even your smell. Jeonghan did not feel the very particular repulsion he always felt whenever he came in close contact with a demon.
But he wished to. He tried to force himself to recoil at the thought of you, after he met you. But everything inside him made him want to walk right back to that pub where you used to work. In the back of his mind, he saw the doors to the pub, the bar, he wanted to go there one more time and see you.
It felt wrong. It felt so dirty and sticky to even think about you without recoiling. But Jeonghan was strong-willed, and very diligent on his job, so he just kept himself to his business. Tracking and getting rid of demons. But somehow, he could not get near you again, even if everything in his life obligated him to track you, hunt you.
Time went on like this, his mind plagued with the morbid curiosity to go back to that pub and see you again. In his dreams, he saw your eyes, he heard your voice make out the same exact words you told him the night he met you. He heard your voice utter your name, the sound echoing in the back of his mind as he tried to continue with his life.
Until one night, when something unfortunate happened.
It was one of those sleepless nights, Jeonghan decided to go on a night watch out of town. He was tracking some demon activity he was informed of nights ago. This demon apparently had a pattern which was not a rarity, demons could tend to go for certain humans at a certain time, it was not weird.
But apparently, this demon liked to hunt a particular kind of human; humans that were either wanted criminals or suspects of a crime, people that liked transgressing against their own in the worst ways imaginable. And that was something worth noting to Jeonghan, it made this demon easy to catch.
Or at least, that is what he had thought.
Night after night, Jeonghan had no luck falling asleep and when he went out to track this demon, he had no luck focusing on the task at hand. He was on the verge of calling it a night, wanting to fall asleep in his car, or in the nearest motel he could find. Walking aimlessly on the side of the road, he realized that it would take him about twenty minutes to get to where he parked his car and sighed.
A small shiver ran down his spine as if the line of his back was being stroked with the tip of a paintbrush. His eyelids fluttered in response, and his chest felt strange, like overcome by a fuzzy sensation.
He needed to be alert, he thought. A demon was around, and he could sense it. Stopping his lazy gait, he sent his gaze to scope his surroundings, through the thicket of trees flanking the lonely road.
But as the feeling inside him returned, and more intensely, he realized that he was in danger. A rustle of leaves echoed at the other side of the road where he stood, and slowly, a figure emerged from the trees, it moved gracefully and gently. A pair of dark horns distorted the shadow.
As he reached for the knife strapped to his thigh, he realized that he only felt endangered because it was you who moved through the shadows of the forest. And he wanted to avoid you above all.
“I was beginning to wonder if I’d ever see you again,” your voice reached him like a gentle caress on his mind.
“What are you doing here?” Jeonghan said, not removing his fist from the handle of his knife. “Are you following me?”
You tilted your head to one side, a smirk spreading on your lips. “Why, are you afraid of me?” you mused, laughing lightly. But when he did not reply to your quip, you just shrugged. “I came out because I was craving a snack. But I think you might suffice.”
His fist tightened around the handle, his eyes quickly reading your stance, but you remained leaning on your side to the trunk of the tree.
“Relax, hunter,” you said, tossing your hair from your shoulder to your back and crossing your arms. “Have a little laugh, you look tense.”
Jeonghan stood his ground, lifting his chin to analyze you a bit further. “Did you kill any humans tonight?”
“No, not yet,” you picked your nails, trying to appear as uninterested in his questioning as possible, but your heart was running a mile per second. Being around Jeonghan was thrilling, it made you feel full in your chest and every nerve beneath your skin to call for him.
“But you will,” he said, realizing that it was you, the demon he was looking for. The demon that only fed on men that hurt women and children.
“Well, a girl’s gotta eat,” you sighed, pushing yourself off the tree and taking a step toward him.
He tensed up at that instant, one foot stepping back but then he decided to hold his ground, trying to resist walking away. You were dangerous, and he did not know what set you apart from other demons.
You ignored the fact that he still had a hand on his knife, and he was very much as lethal as you were. Taking some steps to where he stood still, you coiled one finger around a strand of hair, smiling when you realized that he was not afraid of you, but weary.
“You seem like you need a night off,” you pointed, coming closer to him to take a fuller look at his face, seeing the bags under his lifeless eyes, and the dry skin on his lips.
“Don’t come any closer,” Jeonghan warned, rigid with the question of why he could not make his muscles move in any direction.
“Or what?” you asked, standing in front of him. “Are you going to kill me, hunter?” you asked, your eyes glimmering in the dark, full of curiosity.
“If you take another step I might,” Jeonghan replied with certainty, something in him stirring with a strange fascination when you smiled at the clear warning.
“No, you won’t,” you countered, giving him one of those looks that made him feel more uneasy. “You’re not at full strength, you’re tired, and hungry. And worst of all, you feel like you can’t move, am I right?”
It was like you could read into his soul, he thought. Your words were like wildfire spreading inside him, it made his insides boil with rage. Part of him wondered why he was made this uncomfortable and angry at something one demon said. Demons spoke out of the need to lure hunters into a trap, and this was no different. But this trap seemed so tempting.
To drive your point further, you took another step, inches away from Jeonghan.
“I make you nervous,” you whispered, fascination glinting on your eyes as you wallowed. “What are you going to do, Jeonghan? You can’t run away, and you can’t attack me, so what’s your next move?”
His breathing shifted when his name fell from your lips. He had never felt this way, he realized. The quick pulse, the fluttering in his stomach, the shaky breathing, he knew how nervousness felt, but this was entirely new to him.
“Hm?” you pressed, tilting your head to one side as you nearly stood on your tiptoes to level with him. “Come on, no one’s going to judge you if you run away, and I won’t tell a soul,” you showed him a mischievous smile, one that he might have hated if it were not for the tight feeling invading him wholly.
As you stood before him, one thing became painfully clear to him: he was attracted to you. It was something simply physical, or that was what he tried to convince himself. Maybe it was your pretty face, your velvety tone, the grace in which you moved. Not only that, as he casted a look down to meet your face, he also had a glimpse of your frame and the thought of wanting to meet every curve of your body was alluring.
So alluring that he wanted to surrender to it.
At that, your eyes shone more intensely. Again, as though you had a secret line to his thoughts, and you just had discovered what he was thinking.
But you sighed with faux disappointment. “And here I thought you were fun,” you pouted in mockery. “Pity. I guess I’ll just go and have fun elsewhere,” you moved again, walking around his body once, as though taking another full look at him. “Bye, hunter.”
And then you sunk into the line of trees again, disappearing from his view. But his senses were already tuned and following you, so he could hear every step you took down the forest. And he could not help but take a step in your direction as well.
That night, he chased you down the forest, his heart beating in a frenzy, his mind blank but with only one intention. You started sprinting, laughing lightly when he kept with your pace and ran closely behind you.
When Jeonghan was finally within reach, he grabbed your arm, turning you around and messing up your step. You stumbled back against a tree, realizing that he had calculated this because his arms were caging you in on both of your sides.
Jeonghan brought a hand to your throat, his fingers pressing on your skin harshly, his strength subsiding once he felt your pulse. But his face, riddled with confusion and frustration at the same time, his mouth parted a little as he could not bring himself to say anything. His gaze swam over the features of your pretty face, stopping once on your eyes, your lips.
The moment was deadly quiet as you witnessed the fire inside him die down slowly once he came in contact with you, skin on skin. It was game over, you knew it, and Jeonghan did too. There was a quiet exchange of glances right before Jeonghan dipped his head and you closed your eyes, gulping on air as his lips met your own with a swift kiss.
What possessed him to do that, Jeonghan did not know, but he was not in the position to ask himself any more questions because he did it again. Kissing you now with abandon, his lips sinking in between yours, making out with you like he never had with anyone else. You moaned into the kiss, sending him into a frenzy.
It was as though you were both committing a crime, and none of you would say a word. You grabbed him by the flaps of the black leather jacket, pulling him impossibly closer to your body, the proximity making your chest feel fuller, your blood heating up.
He released his grip on your throat, his fingers sliding down your torso to undo the button of your blouse. The next moves were rushed, as though neither of you wanted to stop and question what you were about to do. And the forest around you stood silent too, being witness to the fateful deed.
In seconds, Jeonghan had you pressed against the trunk of the tree, your legs wrapped around his hips, your skirt hiked up your tummy, your chest naked and exposed to him. You sneaked a hand between your body and his, reaching for his hard cock to guide it to your entrance for him to sink inside you, making you feel every inch of his dick in one go.
The first stroke set your whole body aflame. Your mouth fell open, but no sound came out as Jeonghan wasted no time and started fucking you with hard thrusts, not giving you time to adjust to the stretch of his cock. The wind got knocked out of your lungs with sharp exhales, but you kept yourself angled for the merciless rutting, unable to look away from the fiery obsession growing inside him, showing on his face.
Neither of you said a thing, just kept looking at each other, unable to speak, or to look away. The feeling was exquisite, invading every inch of your body, tingling beneath your skin. Jeonghan’s eyes glazed over, his mouth parting slightly but he kept himself quiet, fucking you to get rid of the thing trying to rip his heart out.
And when you reached your orgasm, it was the best feeling you had ever experienced in your life. It had you finally moaning out his name, clenching around him as he too spilled himself inside you with hard thrusts.
That was the night that kickstarted the deep craving and obsession you had for each other, the push and pull that Jeonghan could not make sense of until the night you told him of the bond. That was the night that Jeonghan regretted for a long time until he lost you.
“Hey, are you there?”
Jeonghan lifted his head, snapping back to reality. He had been contemplating for hours, sitting in the kitchen with a mug of cold tea in his hands. His fingers had grown cold again. He cleared his throat and nodded. “Yeah, what’s up?”
Mingyu opened the fridge for the fifth time that day, just to close it again. “Wonwoo and I are going to a Halloween parade downtown, see if we catch something fun. Wanna come with us?”
Jeonghan did not know for how long he had been sitting there reminiscing about you. In his mind, Jeonghan could still feel your touch on his skin, so it was difficult for him to assimilate what he had just heard, so he nodded again, accepting the invitation. “Sure,” he croaked.
“‘Kay,” Mingyu smiled giddily with the triumph of getting Jeonghan out of the house. “See you in the garage in five minutes.”
The streets were full of nocturnal life. People came out with costumes of all kinds, some of them were recognizable to Jeonghan, and some were not. It was a small city where the headquarters were located, but Jeonghan was not surprised to see a lot of people gathering there for the Halloween parade.
Demons ran amok in places like this, they practically crawled into these types of events, and humans were easier prey in crowded places. It was also easier for demons to mask themselves.
“We should go, Mingyu,” Jeonghan said, moving through the crowd and using Mingyu as a shield.
“Maybe we could move to the sidelines,” Wonwoo suggested, walking behind Jeonghan. “It would be easier to stay alert like that, we don’t have to be in the thick of the crowd.”
“Have a little fun, you two,” Mingyu said. He was a person that could find the good side to nearly everything, even this damned job, Jeonghan thought.
“I’m going to take a breather,” Jeonghan said, trying to cut through the crowd.
“Gods, you are one ray of sunshine,” Mingyu tutted. “Come on, this way,” he motioned to one side of the multitude of people, where they could cross more efficiently.
Jeonghan followed, walking away from the sea of people, and starting to thread through it to get to the other side of the street when he felt it. It was a rush, tingling down from the back of his head to the rest of his spine. It left him speechless, breathless.
“Wait,” Jeonghan blurted, placing a hand on Mingyu’s shoulder.
“What is it?” he frowned, sending his gaze through the sea of faces. The muscles of his jaw twitched, and as he drew in a breath, he exhaled: “Demon.”
Jeonghan stood frozen, eyes fixated on the pavement. “No,” he uttered dejectedly, straightening up to catch his breath. Not just any demon. He searched through the mass of unknown eyes, the masks, the makeup, growing more and more desperate as the feeling returned caressing his back, making him shudder.
“Jeonghan, what is it?” Mingyu muttered beside him, squaring up his shoulders after noticing the shocked expression on your face.
Yoon Jeonghan would know your face anywhere. Not just that, but the way the very air seemed to change whenever you were near.
“Mingyu, stop,” he whispered, digging his fingers on the muscle to bring him to a halt.
Mingyu dropped his jaw slightly, ignoring Jeonghan’s direct order and made a motion to step into the crowd again, a hand reaching for the knife on his back.
“I said stop,” Jeonghan ordered at once, his tone firm and snappy.
You moved through the sea of people, your eyes swimming all over the place in true amazement, your mouth parting as you looked at the costumes that the people around you wore.
Jeonghan shuddered, unable to blink in fear you were an illusion. But Mingyu saw you too, he saw your wings in full display, brushing against the humans around you, and he saw your black horns curving back from the crown of your head.
You laughed when a man dressed in a killer clown costume jumped on you, trying to get a scare out of you but failing miserably. The sound of your laughter made Jeonghan weak, it made him want to dissolve into the pavement below his feet.
“What the fuck?” Mingyu whispered, looking at you and then back at Jeonghan. “She’s a demon, what are we waiting for?”
“She’s mine,” Jeonghan snapped but did not look away from you. He simply removed his hand from Mingyu’s shoulder and started to walk slowly towards you as you moved through the myriads of costumes, wide-eyed in amazement.
As he came closer, reality seemed more and more like a joke to him. He tried to convince himself that perhaps he was dreaming again. But there was no denying the bond pulsating stronger as he approached you.
“Nice wings,” a guy said in passing, catching your attention but only for a fleeting moment.
You made no reply, only continued looking at your surroundings, the lights mirroring your dark eyes, full of hunger, full of life. Dark eyes that glided all over Jeonghan’s frame as he stood in front of you, perplexed to the point he forgot speech, he forgot how to use his mouth.
“What are you supposed to be?” you asked, tilting your head to one side.
Jeonghan did not know what to reply, as he was unsure that you even knew that you spent the last three months three feet below ground. You looked as alive as the day he told you he loved you.
You died, I buried you. Jeonghan’s mind reeled over and over. Your heart stopped beating, I buried you.
“I’m… I…” Jeonghan whispered, not by choice, but by the inability to raise his voice higher.
Your eyes went over the features of his face, and he expected eagerly to see a glint of recognition in them, but you beat him to it. “Do I know you?” you asked, your voice soft and gentle with him, but you did not know that your question might have been like a dagger to his heart.
His heart caved in, and he took the pain as he had been taking it for the last three months that you were gone. “I don’t think so, no,” he finally said, his pulse quickening upon realizing that the sound of his voice made your pupils dilate.
His voice. A very distant memory, like trying to recall a lost dream upon waking up from a long nap. You studied him with your gaze one more time, trying to figure out why his face meant something to you.
Jeonghan saw his two companions through the corner of his eye, but he ignored them, knowing the reason why you also looked so wide-eyed. “Are you hungry?” he asked, and seeing your brow furrowing, he quickly added with a thumb pointing back. “There’s a diner down the street, far away from all this noise.”
And far away from any potential casualties.
“I suppose I don’t get a name,” you quipped, and shivers ran down his spine.
So he tried to figure out if that brought back any memories when he said: “Only if I get yours first.”
Your gaze went soft, your breathing quickening slightly but only for him to notice it. You did not know your name, and the realization shook you so hard that it made you dizzy. “Yeah, I think I’ll go with you. If you’re buying.”
At that, Jeonghan mustered up a light smile, seeing that although your memories were gone, you were still you. “Yeah, I’m buying.”
He cast a look back only to make sure that Mingyu had understood why Jeonghan had ordered him to stop. And there was a knowing look mirroring back in Mingyu’s eyes, as he needed no explanation. Jeonghan nodded to him and then motioned you to follow down the street where the diner was located.
As you walked in front of him, he got a view of your entire frame. The t-shirt you had worn the day that you died was torn on the back midway through, for when those hunters tried to cut your wings. The rest of your clothes were dirty too, black with traces of blood and dirt, adding to the illusion of a Halloween costume.
“This place is good. I’ve been here many times before,” Jeonghan lied, keeping an eye on you to see if you were keen on catching his lies. “The pancakes and syrup are delicious.”
“Pancakes and syrup?” your eyes flitted to his face and back to the diner as Jeonghan pushed the door open, holding it for you.
Jeonghan nodded in short motions, his heart deflating a little when he saw no evidence that you had caught his lie. “You’ll love it.”
“Mmn,” you hummed confusedly, following him like a puppy that has just found a knowing elder. “I believe you.”
Jeonghan motioned to a seat of one of the booths and you slid obediently, crossing your arms on the table. He flagged down one of the servers and ordered for you only, glancing your way back and forth, tearing his gaze away only when you noticed his eyes on you.
“Eh,” you began, scratching an invisible itch on the back of your hand when the server kept looking at you weirdly until she walked away.
“It’s your wings,” Jeonghan pointed at your large, membranous black wings with the tip of his nose. “They look too real for a Halloween costume.”
You pouted, giving one of your wings a look. “They are real,” you muttered, seemingly offended.
Jeonghan sighed, unable to tear his eyes away from you. I’m glad they are, I’m glad you are real, he wanted to say but the words never came. “Yeah, I know.”
“These are too,” you pointed to the black horns curving back from the crown of your head.
“I know,” Jeonghan muttered, leaning over with a curiosity that he could no longer try to shake off. “Can you try to hide them?” he asked.
Your eyes were windows to your mind because they widened in shock for an instant. “Is that possible?”
Jeonghan realized that he never asked you how you did it, so he nodded and thought of a reply quickly. “Imagine them gone.”
Instinctively, your eyes swam upwards, focusing for half a thought and then your horns dissipated from his vision. “Oh,” you muttered, smiling in small triumph. “Did I do it?”
He smiled with you, unbeknownst that he had not done that in months. “You did it,” he said, his chest finally feeling whole and warm. “Can you try with your wings now?”
“Mmmn,” you frowned, breathing in and then they were gone too. “Oh, that feels weird,” you muttered with a small giggle that sent chills down his spine.
“Two coffees and pancakes with syrup for the young lady,” the server chirped, aloof that you had gotten rid of your horns and wings completely, serving the order and then walking away.
“Thanks,” he muttered, expecting for your first bite.
You were aloof to his scrutiny, sinking your fork into your food and taking one bite. You had the reaction that Jeonghan had secretly been waiting for, your eyes widened, glinting as you released a pleased moan. “Wow,” you muttered, wasting no time and taking another bite.
“Is it good?” Jeonghan whispered, keeping his eyes on you as you ate eagerly.
“So good,” you mumbled, your cheeks stuffed with your favorite dish. “I like this.”
“I’m glad,” Jeonghan replied meaningfully, trying for a second time to see if that brought any memories back. After seeing your reaction, he had no doubt in mind that somehow you were miraculously brought back to him instead, he was full of questions now, and he knew it would not be a straight answer to every single one of them.
“Penny for your thoughts?” you raised your eyebrows just as you were about to take another bite from your food. When he remained motionless, you added: “We’re strangers, I know, but I know that look.”
“Eh?” he frowned.
“You know, when someone wants to say something but doesn’t have the guts to,” you shrugged. “I don’t know much about things, but I can be a really good listener, and…” you sneaked a glance at his face and back to your plate. “You seem familiar.”
Jeonghan saw some glimpse of hope, but he remained careful. Nothing could be this good in his life and you coming back to it had to be another joke somehow. “Where do you come from?” he asked.
You pursed your lips, dubious of how to reply but you just went with what you could make out from experience. “I actually don’t know,” you said with an awkward air. “I dug myself out of a hole in the ground.”
Jeonghan showed you a sad smile. “That seems like a weird experience,” he commented just to keep you talking.
And it worked. “Yeah, I guess nobody thought of double-checking to see if I was really dead,” you smiled lightly but sent a quick glance to verify if Jeonghan would understand your dry humour.
“Or maybe you’re just a very deep sleeper.”
That made you laugh, the sound bubbly and airy. It surprised you for a second, but Jeonghan caught that look on your face despite him being overridden with a deep sense of joy when he heard the sound coming out of your mouth.
Jeonghan tried to keep his facial expressions in check, but he was so mesmerized that it showed in his glinting eyes.
“What about you, stranger?” you asked, pushing the empty plate aside and propped one elbow on the table, resting your chin on your hand.
“What about me?” he asked uncomfortably, coughing to shake off the deep wonder he felt.
“Where do you come from?” you asked innocently, shifting slightly on your seat to mask that you were also uncomfortable by the sense of familiarity his face gave you.
“I come from a town very, very far away from here,” he responded.
“Are you not hungry? You didn’t eat,” you said, taking the cup of coffee to your lips to drink one large gulp, you recoiled immediately, putting the cup down and using that hand to cover your mouth.
“What?” Jeonghan asked, frowning upon knowing that reaction. It was a natural instinct to recoil from things that could burn, humans did it. But not demons. Demons could not get burned from a hot coffee, much less feel like recoiling instinctively.
“It’s hot,” you said, lifting your eyes to him in shame as your eyes watered slightly from the stinging pain.
“Did you get burned?” Jeonghan pressed in utter bewilderment.
“Well, yeah, that’s what happens when something is really, really hot!” your eyes widened.
Then you did something that only sent him further down his intrigue, reaching out to grab the sugar to add two spoons to your coffee. You did this naturally and without much thinking. It was as though your memories were lost, but things out of habit remained with you. He wondered then if that was how you had instinctively found him. He wondered how strongly you felt the bond.
“Well?” you asked, stirring your coffee with the spoon with gentleness. When he just raised his eyebrows, you added: “Aren’t you hungry?”
He cleared his throat awkwardly. “No, I’m not,” he replied, clasping his hands beneath his chin and propping his elbows on the table. “You?”
You nodded. “I’m full,” you replied contently.
Confusion gripped him again, making him furrow his brow. “You’re not hungry anymore?” he asked, knowing that you could take one full meal, and still be hungry for more. Because no meal could satiate your need to feed on souls.
But you nodded cutely. “Yep, full.”
Another glimpse of hope. Something Jeonghan desperately wanted to cling to. If you could burn yourself, and feel full after one meal… not only that, but you miraculously and quite literally crawled out of your grave.
“Do you remember what it felt like?” Jeonghan whispered, so quiet that for a second he feared you would not be capable of hearing him.
But you raised your eyes. “What?”
“When you woke up in that hole, do you remember what happened before that?”
You shook your head slowly. “Nope,” you pouted once more. “How do you know I don’t remember?” you inquired, tilting your head to one side.
“I uh,” Jeonghan leaned back on his seat, flagging the server to ask for the bill. “I guess you’re familiar too,” he said, showing you a tight smile.
“Mmph,” you looked at him for a long moment, thinking that his eyes, the glint in them made you think of a spark before a fire.
Jeonghan on the other side of the table, was beginning to mortify with the idea that your temporary death might have inched you closer to becoming human. The time you tried to become human was through soul starvation, something that was slowly killing you too. And he thought that maybe you were only able to come back because you remained part-demon. A half-mortal.
Jeonghan also suspected that it was him uttering your name in the middle of the night the detonator for your resurrection if he could even call it that. Summoning a demon was a whole ritual, but you were bound to him and him to you, so everything that he thought he knew about it was uncertain too.
“I guess I should thank you for the food,” you toyed with the edges of the table without looking at him. “But I also don’t know why you’re doing this for me.”
“You have nothing to thank me for,” he said, realizing that his throat had gone dry with his thinking, he felt breathless, and it was not only because it was hard for him to sit with the fact that you were back, but also because he now had to make a choice.
If he was right and you were half-human now, you were also unaware of the bond. Jeonghan was face to face with the opportunity to finally let you go, and set you free from this vicious cycle. You would not be subjected to a lifetime of misery with him, being chased for being who you are and being with a demon hunter like him.
But there was another problem: he made a promise to you.
“Are you okay?” you whispered.
“Yeah, yes I am,” he cleared his throat once again, he pulled out his wallet and left a bill on the table. “Listen, I’ll show you a place where you can stay for now, alright?”
Before you could answer, he stood up from the table and walked towards the door of the diner, making you follow him outside.
“Where are we going?” you asked, trying to keep up with his large steps.
“A place where you could be taken in, a shelter,” he eyed you as you walked beside him.
“Will I see you again?” you looked panicked for a second, fear creeping inside you at the thought of him disappearing.
“No,” he replied shortly, lowering his gaze to the ground as he led you through an alleyway, knowing that the shelter would be just across from it.
Jeonghan could honor his promise to you. He would not walk away from you, he would not let you go. That would make the bond grow peaceful and content, and that would make his suffering end at once.
One undeniable truth was that if he could walk away from you, there would be no danger around you. Sure, you were still half-demon, so that would eventually put a target on your back. But he could keep an eye on you from afar, make sure you’re making the right choices for yourself, as you always have.
That way, maybe you could continue to have the life you always wanted. Maybe, in time, you would find someone who would give you what he never could, maybe that someone would be able to love you the way you deserve.
“Right,” Jeonghan breathed, trying to ease the pain in his chest. “I’ll be going now,” he muttered, slowly turning around and walking down the empty alleyway, every step becoming more and more torturous to him.
You watched him walk, the movement of his body growing weaker as the distance grew. “Hey,” you called, but he did not stop. “Stranger!” you began approaching him, but his steps took him farther from you. “Stop!”
Jeonghan did, breathing raggedly. Breaking a promise was hard, and the pain was nearly lethal. He vaguely remembered you saying something about breaking promises made to demons, but the pain numbed him to his last nerve ending.
You quickly made your way over to him, noticing that his body was shaking uncontrollably. “Hey,” you sighed, gathering yourself.
“What?” Jeonghan forced out, his voice quivering as he tried to stop the tremors. He was growing feverish, but as you closed the distance, he could regain some of his composure.
“I can’t let you go,” you frowned, unable to comprehend why you were so intrigued by him.
Jeonghan laughed dazedly, it was a mad laugh but not at you, but directed towards life and its crazy way to mock him. “You must,” he replied, the feeling coiling in his throat nearly strangled him. “Go to the shelter. They’ll take you in. You could start a life far away from this fucking mess.”
“Start a life?” you parroted again. “I don’t know my name, or who I am. Don’t go. Please?”
Jeonghan searched your eyes one more time. If he could not keep his promise, then at least he would give you back your name before walking away from you once and for all. “Your name…” he choked out your name, falling on his knees from the numbing pain he felt.
“That’s my name?” you whispered, trying to keep him on his feet, but he was growing heavy in your arms. “What’s yours?”
Jeonghan shook his head slowly, his eyes glazing over as he started to lose consciousness. “No,” whispered. “Go, forget me. Forget all this.”
“Please,” you insisted. Grabbing his face as he knelt in front of you, seeing his dark eyes, his soft lips. “I know you. I know I do,” you muttered, kneeling down so you could see him face to face.
He sighed, grabbing one of your hands and pressing it gently against his cheek, closing his eyes briefly. “My name is Yoon Jeonghan,” he muttered, bracing himself for the merciless thrill of the bond snapping in place one more time.
You sucked in a breath, your body tensing as the familiar feeling returned to your bones, coursing through your veins. “Jeonghan,” you breathed.
Jeonghan kept his eyes closed but shuddered as you uttered his name, choking back a sob. “I’m sorry,” he whispered, afraid of opening his eyes. “I promised I wouldn’t walk away from you,” he slurred the words, feeling lightheaded as his forehead fell forward, bumping with yours. “I’m sorry…”
“Jeonghan,” you whispered, your hands cradling his face shifted slightly in their place, feeling his skin.
He held his breath out of fear that you might reject the bond as he did to you many months ago. He wished to keep you there for a second longer, your forehead pressed to his, even if his lucidity waned, verging closer to passing out.
But then, you ran the pad of your thumb over his bottom lip softly, making him pull back slightly, opening his eyes to see your face. Something had changed. In your eyes he found the familiarity in them, you knew him.
He whispered your name carefully, fearful. “Baby?” he breathed, right before his head lolled to one side, his body following it to the ground, where he lost consciousness.
Jeonghan woke up abruptly, disorientated. The ceiling was one he had never seen before and that induced him into a panic that pushed him to sit on the bed where he lay. Lightheaded, he understood after some seconds that he was in a motel room. And that he was completely alone.
Had he been dreaming all this time? He rose from the bed going around it to look for traces of you. But he found nothing. Breathing fitfully, he took his hands to his head, forcing himself to focus.
The door clicked softly and was pushed open cautiously. As you entered the room, you sneaked a look directly at the bed, expecting to find Jeonghan still in his sleep, your gaze swam across the room, falling upon Jeonghan, who stood frozen directly parallel to you.
“Ah, you’re awake,” you chirped, entering the room and closing the door behind you. You had half expected to find the room empty if Jeonghan had woken up alone while you went to grab something to eat.
Jeonghan remained rigid, looking at you as though afraid he might wake up from a dream again. His breathing was ragged, and his vision began to blur.
“I hope you don’t mind I took your wallet,” you said, leaving a paper bag on the chair as you removed the zipper hoodie from your shoulders. “And your hoodie.”
“Wh-what—how…” Jeonghan breathed, shaking with so many emotions at the same time it was hard to focus, it was hard for him to command the muscles of his mouth to demand the answers he needed to know.
You approached him carefully, rubbing your hands together as though anxious. “You passed out last night,” you explained, though that was obvious to him, he did not need you to say that. “And I took you here because I don’t know where you live. And I don’t have a home.”
Jeonghan took in a breath sharply, tears spilling from his eyes as he listened to your voice. He raised one hand slowly, carefully meeting your cheek to make sure you were not an illusion.
You began to worry, your eyebrows pinching together. “Was I gone too long?” you asked meaningfully, understanding that he was in shock.
Jeonghan nodded slowly, the pain in his heart pulsating when you grabbed his hand on your cheek, pressing it against your skin before you wrapped an arm around his torso, so he did the same, hugging you tightly to his body.
“I’m sorry,” you cooed softly, trying to swallow your tears as he sobbed in your arms.
“I missed you,” he muttered, his body wrapping you completely, his face hiding on the curve of your neck, his arms grabbing you tightly to the point the air started to leave your lungs.
Your heart deflated upon hearing the raw sadness in his voice. “I know,” you whispered, feeling the bond deep inside you pulsating, feeling everything he felt during these months of your absence.
“I buried you,” he whispered, shaking uncontrollably, his fingers curled around your clothes, trying to hold onto you to never let you go again.
You caressed his back gently as he shook with sobs. “I’m sorry,” you said, feeling guilty for the pain he endured while you were gone.
Jeonghan grabbed your face, still finding it hard to believe that you were there, and you were fine. “How?” he asked, his voice waning over the emotions coiling in his throat.
“I don’t know,” you whispered, circling his neck with your hands as he moved to press a long kiss on your forehead.
It did not matter, all the explanations in the world would fall short of explaining the relief Jeonghan felt.
“I’m sorry you had to go through this,” you said, knowing that there would be no resolution to this.
“It’s okay now,” he replied, pressing his forehead on yours.
“Jeonghan,” you muttered, pulling back to see his face before asking: “Tell me what happened, please.”
He went rigid with pain in an instant, but he nodded slowly, moving to sit down on the foot of the bed to avoid growing weak in his stance. You sat beside him, reaching for his hand as though you could not keep your hands to yourself.
“Do you remember the hunters?” he asked, waiting for your confirmation and he proceeded when you nodded silently. “And do you… remember what they did to you?”
Your gaze fell out of focus as you tried to conjure the memory of the moment before your death. The memories were fragments of pain and worry; you remembered some things, and those were enough. “Yes,” you said.
Jeonghan bristled in pain slightly, but continued despite it. “You were gone for three months,” he explained, the pain from your absence still felt recent, the wound still fresh. It was baffling to him that you were now here, as though nothing had happened.
“How am I back?” you asked slowly, furrowing your brow slightly. “What did you do, Jeonghan?”
He understood at once that you were worried about what he could have done for you to return scatheless, or so you thought.
“I…” he lowered his gaze, growing ashamed of himself. “I think I summoned you in my sleep.”
“Is that possible?” you asked. “I thought you needed to do a ritual to summon me.”
“That’s the thing,” he raised his gaze again, shifting on the bed so he could face you better. “I don’t think that applies to people like us. I didn’t need to do a ritual, I just needed to call for you.”
“So you’re telling me that you did not say my name once for three months?”
Shame returned to his face, nodding silently without looking at your eyes. “I’m sorry,” he said, his bottom lip trembling slightly. “I just couldn’t—it hurt so much,” he sighed, squeezing his eyes shut.
“Hey,” you whispered, bringing a hand to cup his cheek, forcing his brown eyes to meet yours. “It’s okay,” you showed him a light smile. “You did what you had to do.”
His eyebrows pinched softly. “Can you forgive me?” he whispered.
You sat on your knees beside him, grabbing his face fully with your hands. “There is nothing to forgive, Jeonghan,” you said warmly, pushing his long bangs away from his face. “I’m fine, and I’m here thanks to you.”
He wrapped his arms around your waist to bring you down with him to the bed. “I can’t believe that you’re back,” he said with a tiny tone. “I thought I would never see you again.”
Meanwhile, you were still trying to digest the fact that he lived through three months of mourning and guilt, while you just closed your eyes and woke up in a clearing with flowers around you. Confused, but with one thought in mind: follow the thing that pulled you to him.
Jeonghan caressed the side of your face with the back of his fingers, looking at you longingly as the pain inside him deflated slowly. “You’re half human now,” he told you, remembering the look on your face the night before.
You nodded, enjoying the gentle shivers that his touch gave you. “It feels funny,” you giggled slightly. “I’m weaker now.”
Jeonghan mirrored your smile, his fingers trailing down to grab your chin. “I guess I should be careful with you now,” he whispered, meeting your lips with his own.
The kiss ignited every single inch of your skin, drawing out a small moan from you. And for Jeonghan, it felt like he was coming back to life too, his lips searching for yours hungrily, emitting a small grunt into your mouth that only made you want more.
“Jeonghan,” you breathed when he stopped kissing you, but his lips lingered on yours.
“I missed you,” he replied in kind, his lips brushing against yours softly.
You moved your hand to caress his chest over the black t-shirt he wore. “Do you want to show me?” you mumbled, pressing a tender kiss on his lips.
He moved his hand from your chin to cradle your cheek, looking into your eyes. Jeonghan lost count of the times he wished to be this close to you again, to feel the warmth of your skin, to breathe in your scent. Unable to break away from you, he pressed your body to the mattress, climbing on top of you while kissing your lips hungrily.
You made a muffled sound on his lips, grabbing his face to pull him as close as possible to you. Kissing Jeonghan still felt electrifying, now that you were part-human. You were still able to sense him through the bond. Everything was the same except that your senses were slightly dimmed.
“What’s that?” Jeonghan mumbled between kisses.
“It feels different,” you breathed, grabbing his shoulders, feeling the edge of his collarbone with the pads of your thumbs.
“Different, how?” he asked, his gaze coasting over the features of your pretty face.
“Like the stronger part of me is numb,” you said, showing him a meek smile when the explanation felt ridiculous to you. But your smile faded, the glint in your eyes dimming a little. “I can’t see your soul anymore.”
Jeonghan tensed slightly on top of you. “You could see my soul?”
You nodded slowly, ashamed that you never told him while you were able to see that fiery flame dancing inside him. “Sorry,” you whispered.
“It’s okay,” he replied in kind, realizing the reason behind the weird looks you would give him, you could see through him quite literally. “I wonder how many other things will be different now,” he said.
You would probably age closer to a normal rate now. You were part-human, you could fill your tummy with human food, and you were at risk of falling sick like humans but the probability of that could be minimal.
“You still like me, right?” you asked with a playful giggle.
Jeonghan rolled his eyes, smiling with you. “Unfortunately, yes. I do,” he mumbled, lacing his words with sarcasm.
“How much?” you teased, enjoying that despite you were no longer able to see his soul, he was still an open book to you.
“Shut up,” he said, leaning over to press a tender kiss on your lips, muffling the sound of your giggle. “I love you,” he mumbled.
You closed your eyes, shuddering at the sound of his voice, the bond responding to it like a bolt of lightning shooting through you. “I love you more,” you replied sweetly, still grabbing his face with your hands.
At that, Jeonghan could have sworn that the pain he endured without you was cured. He released a groan into the kiss, his lips diving deeper into yours, only breaking away when your hands slipped beneath his t-shirt, and he helped you take it off.
He followed your body when you sat up on the bed to take your t-shirt off, and he quickly moved to take your jeans and panties just so he could have you wholly naked before him. There was no rush to relieve the pressure growing inside him, he just wanted to appreciate every curve of your body, to leave kisses on every inch of your warm skin.
And you could see that need in his eyes, it was visible how much he missed you. He stood on his knees before you, looking at you for one long moment. Your heart squeezed for him when you realized that, while you were delighted to explore the changes in your now partially human form, he was healing from the grief he felt when you were gone.
“Jeonghan,” you called, snapping him from the train of thoughts reeling in his mind. His eyes met yours. “Come here,” you said, raising your arms to wrap him in them when he pressed his bare chest against yours.
“Sorry,” he whispered.
“It’s okay,” you replied, parting your legs so he could slot his hips between them. You grabbed his cheek as he left one kiss on yours. “I love you.”
“I love you,” he gasped, moving his lips to leave a trail of kisses on your jawline, and your throat, humming when he realized that the scent of your skin remained the same. He delighted in the taste of your skin when he ran his tongue on one of your breasts, wrapping his lips around your pebbled nipple to tease it a little, just to hear the sweet sound of your moans.
“Jeonghan,” you sighed, bringing a hand to grab a fistful of his dark hair.
He hummed softly, his breath fanning on your bumpy skin as he moved to lick your other nipple, kissing it and grazing it lightly with his teeth. He pressed his lips on your sternum, resuming his trail of kisses down until he sank between your legs.
“Fuck,” you breathed, finding out that despite you were not at full power as you were, you were still very much sensitive. Your skin prickled when his hands slipped beneath your thighs, holding you as he placed the first kiss of many on your inner thigh.
Propping yourself on your elbows to look at him, he raised his eyes too, meeting yours right before licking a generous stripe on your folds. A shudder invaded you, reaching every nerve ending in your body, tearing apart your self-control. Your head lolled back, a pleased sigh escaping your lips as he worked his mouth on your pussy, practically making out with it.
The sensation was near-euphoric. It made your mind go blank. It left you breathless in an instant. You suddenly felt the weight of your absence, as if your body was gently reminding you that you had gone without his touch, even if you had not been aware of it. But a part of you was sure that you never wanted to go another day without his caress.
“Jeonghan,” you called breathily, running your fingers through his long hair, letting his tongue lap between your folds, drinking you in with raw moans.
Your orgasm came fast, faster than you wanted. Your jaw went slack with a loud moan, shuddering hard as he continued eating your pussy out, watching you come undone with lewd gasps until you let your body fall back on the mattress to enjoy the short aftershocks of your climax.
When he climbed back on top of you to kiss your mouth, you moaned when you tased yourself on his lips. Reaching for the belt of his jeans, you swiftly finished undressing him, not hiding how badly you needed him.
“Hey,” he breathed, touching the tip of your nose with his own. Your eyes met his as he lowered his bare body on yours, pressing his chest against yours.
You sighed, skin prickling when you felt his hard dick on your lower tummy as he kissed you again. “Jeonghan,” you moaned into the kiss. “Hurry.”
He obliged, smiling lightly at you before sneaking his hand between your pressed bodies, grabbing his fully hard cock to guide it to your pussy. His eyes swam all over the features of your face, nudging the bulbous head of his cock in your pooling entrance.
Your mouth parted, eyes widening in anticipation when you felt him. “Please,” you mouthed, bracing yourself for the electrifying feeling.
He swallowed hard, starting to sink inside you tortuously slow, delighting himself with the look on your face, the way a gasp left your mouth. You instinctively parted your legs for him, lifting your knees to your chest for him to push inside you to the hilt, and when he did, he released a raw moan.
Jeonghan pulled his hips back, to then push his cock in your walls slowly, as if testing you. He looked at you as he sheathed his cock inside you making you feel every raw inch, the vein in the underside of his shaft, the bulbous cockhead. He breathed out a broken moan, his face contorting in pleasure.
Jeonghan moved his hips, setting a faster pace on top of you when he made sure you had adjusted to the stretch of his cock. The smacking sounds of skin against skin became louder as he quite literally pounded on you, knocking the air out of your lungs with short gasps.
“Jeonghan,” you breathed, squeezing your eyes shut as you swore that you would burst from the pleasure building inside you.
As though on command, he slowed down the rutting of his hips. He breathed fitfully against your lips, leaning his forehead on yours as he kept his thrusts gentle on you, massaging your walls slowly with his cock. “You feel so good,” he whispered, swallowing hard.
“You too,” you sighed, feeling his scarred chest with your palms, keeping your knees up for him to sink his cock deeper inside you. “So good.”
Jeonghan shook slightly, lifting his hips so his cock slipped out of you, paused, and then sheathed himself back inside you, making you feel the length of his cock, every ridge beneath his bulbous cockhead, the warmth of the base of his cock. He smiled when you moaned, gritting your teeth to hold out for him, but pleasure consumed you quickly.
“Baby,” he whispered, framing your head with his arms before leaning to kiss you. “I love you.”
It felt like his dreams came alive to haunt him in real life because for a split second, he was fearful again that this might not be real. But you moaned into the kiss, holding his shoulders with your hands to keep yourself in control. “I love you,” you breathed.
He locked his lips with yours, moaning into the kiss, keeping his thrusts at the same pace that was pushing you to the edge.
“I’m close,” you gasped, pinching your eyebrows almost involuntarily.
Jeonghan planted a loving kiss on your cheek. “Let go, baby,” he whispered. “I’ll come after you.”
“Come with me?” you mumbled.
He smiled at you. “We need to be careful now,” he whispered, pushing his lips against yours tenderly.
“I don’t want to,” you said in defiance, caressing the line of his back until your hands reached his ass, palming him as he pushed his cock inside you.
He laughed lightly, ignoring your feeble attempt at trapping him with your hands. “Do you want me to come inside you?”
You nodded eagerly, unable to speak up, keeping yourself angled for his cock massaging your walls.
Jeonghan knew he had struck a weak point for you. He kissed you again, this time swiftly and chastely. “You wicked thing,” he breathed, pressing another kiss. “Want me to stuff you full of my cum?”
“Fuck, yes, yes, please,” you closed your eyes, inching closer to your orgasm.
He gave you an airy laugh, and you would have paid attention to it if it were not for the merciless shudder consuming you wholly. You cried out loudly as waves of pleasure washed over you, the pleasure so intense that your eyes brimmed with tears. “Jeonghan…”
Jeonghan reached to grab your hands, lacing your fingers with his, and putting them above your head as the pace of his thrusts became faster, harder. He moaned your name, making you think that he was coming with you, stuffing you full of his cum.
But then he pulled out with a raw groan, pushing his forehead against yours as he came on your tummy, ropes of warm cum spilling on your skin, dripping on your sides, trickling down your skin.
Not giving you the opportunity to protest, he kissed you. But you whined impishly in his mouth, making him laugh and press your hands on the pillows with more strength, easily overpowering you.
He stopped kissing you, pausing to look at your face. Once he saw you pouting, he started to laugh, his chest shaking against yours.
You tried to ignore what the sound of his laughter did to you. “You pulled out!” you whined, trying to free your hands from his grasp.
“We don’t know what could happen now that you’re human,” he replied with a dazzling smile.
Maybe he was right, but you just wanted to see that smile, to hear that laugh again so you continued with your childish act. “So what?”
He gave you an airy chuckle. “So what if I get you pregnant? Is that what you want?” he asked, but then something inside him shifted with the realization that it might be something you wanted.
“Maybe,” you replied, your gaze dimming but then you shook your head. “One day. Perhaps. I don’t know.”
He thought of coming up with a quippy response, but the feeling in his chest would not allow him. “Let’s get cleaned up,” he muttered.
After showering, Jeonghan sat at the foot of the bed, half-dressed and drying his long hair with a towel. He raised his eyes as you exited the tiny bathroom of the motel room, approaching him to stand between his parted knees.
“I bought us breakfast. With your money,” you smirked, putting your hands on his shoulders.
Jeonghan’s features broke into a smile. “That sounds great,” he replied, leaving aside the towel and grabbing one of your hands to press a kiss on your knuckles.
Then he gave you a look. One that spoke of months of thinking about you every day, of thinking about what he could have done with you. Life seemed so fragile to him, so fleeting after he lost you, that he kept thinking of the things he would have done differently. And now, you stood before him, a dream come true, the one wish he asked life to grant him.
“What?” you mumbled.
Jeonghan blinked repeatedly when you brought your hand to his forehead, pushing his bangs away. He smiled. “Do you like flowers?”
› author's note: so this kind of just happened. i am obsessed with these two 😭 and can you guys believe that i wrote my first major character death scene ever because of this series? insane
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#jeonghan smut#yoon jeonghan smut#yoon jeonghan x reader#svthub#thediamondlifenetwork#kvanity#ksmutsociety#jeonghan x reader#svt smut#hannieween's kinktober#yoon jeonghan fanfic#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#svt x reader#svt imagines#yoon jeonghan x you#jeonghan fanfic#jeonghan fic#hannieween#hannieweenfest
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Need Somebody | J.WW
+ summary: a heart-to-heart conversation with your best friend leads to an unexpected confession…
+ pair: wonwoo x gn!reader
+ word count: 2.7k
+ content: hurt/comfort, it was never platonic lol, mutual pining, angst, fluff. (I really tried keeping the reader gender-neutral but I’m not 100% sure it is so please lmk if I need to make any changes!)
[borders created by @enchanthings <3]
“So when do you plan on settling down?” Your mother had asked you over dinner. God, you hated the holidays.
Never in your life have you ever dated anyone.
Not that you needed to.
It's not like you haven't had anyone take interest in you either, there would be some people here and there who would pursue you for a bit. You were just simply not interested in them.
Of course, there would be times when you would feel the loneliness creep in even more than usual. But you usually reasoned to yourself that the right person would come with time.
Except tonight happened to be one of those nights.
You see, your family had just left your place a few hours ago. With the holidays coming and going, your family had begun to visit you more often.
Now you obviously loved your family, but man, did they get on your nerves.
Being the youngest amongst your siblings was becoming more difficult as the years passed by. Seeing them get married one by one definitely didn’t help with your case either.
Your mom started to fear for your so-called ‘future’. Which irritated you since you had everything you needed for the most part, that being a well-paying job and a nice place.
Which is exactly what happened today. Your parents (alongside your siblings) started asking you non-stop questions over your love life.
“Mom please don’t,” you tried to keep your tone respectful but it was getting difficult when you weren’t seeing an end to these invasive questions.
“What? All of your other siblings have gotten married… don’t you think that’s it’s time you do too?” Her tone was bordering a slight feeling of concern and stress.
You stayed quiet for a beat, trying to give her a response that would help get her off your back until the next time she saw you.
“We’ve talked about this, I’m not in a rush and surely it will-“ before you could finish your sentence your mom was already finishing it for you.
“-happen with time I know. But don’t you think you are being too picky at this point? Prince Charming doesn’t exist, so stop waiting for him.”
There it was.
Just because you didn’t date around didn’t mean that you were picky.
You just didn’t like wasting your time with the wrong people, that's all it was.
But before you could counter, one of your siblings quickly changed the subject before things eventually escalated into something worse.
And just like that, the rest of your evening had been soured by that single conversation with your mother.
Even hours after your family had left, you still felt bothered by your mother’s disapproving comments.
…
Needless to say, you called the only person who would be awake at one in the morning.
Wonwoo.
You and Wonwoo have been close friends for a few years, having first met in your senior year of college.
At first he was just an acquaintance, someone you thought you would see once in a while. But he somehow happened to be everywhere you were.
You don’t really remember how the two of you actually became friends, it could have been through a mutual friend or class that you shared. But ever since then, the two of you have been inseparable.
You might have had the tiniest crush on him too but you don’t really like thinking about that. You like to think you grew past that stage.
“yn? Is everything okay?” His voice was slightly groggy… shit you might have woken him up.
“Fuck I’m sorry, were you asleep? I’ll leave you-“
What was it with people cutting you off mid-sentence?
“-No I wasn’t. I actually just woke up from my nap, what’s up?”
Wonwoo and his naps. At this point they should not be called naps considering how long he sleeps for.
“Oh you know… just had the best talk with my family.”
You could hear him audibly smile. Wonwoo knew that you didn’t always have the best times with your family, having heard your countless rants throughout the years.
“What did they say this time?” He asked with faux enthusiasm.
“More like what did my mom say. She just kept asking me when I plan on getting married and that I should stop being picky.” As much as you tried to act nonchalant about it, you were really upset by the way things had turned out.
Wonwoo quickly took notice in your slightly wavering voice. It wasn’t normal for you to get emotional over small fights like this. It must have been serious enough for you to remain bothered even after your family had left.
“Hey, don’t take it to heart. I know your mom can say some out of pocket things but try to not let it get to you.” Wonwoo was not the best at comforting people, even he knew that, but he always tried his best to comfort you.
“I know but it’s so…. irritating? Like she told me to stop waiting for Prince Charming as if I’m a little kid.” You wanted to say more but once you started ranting you knew Wonwoo would not be able to keep up.
“I’ve told her so many times that I don’t want to waste my time with the wrong person. I don’t get how she doesn’t understand that!”
Relax. Just take a deep breath and wait for his response.
“Do you want me to come over?”
Even though Wonwoo had been over to your place a numerous amount of times, you still couldn’t help but feel your heartbeat race at the thought of him coming over.
“No, it’s okay I promise. I just wanted to talk to you about it.”
One thing you had learned about Wonwoo was that he was a bit assertive when he was concerned about you.
“Hmmm… doesn’t matter I’m coming over.”
It was always shocking to see him get this bold, seeing how reserved he was with everyone else.
“What was the point in asking then?” You tried sounding annoyed but you knew that your smile was very audible.
“Just wanted to make you feel like you had a choice.” You could hear his cockiness through the phone and somehow, it made your heart do somersaults.
“Don’t you think it’s a little late to be coming over?” Like always, you tried playing it cool, never wanting to show Wonwoo how his words got to you. Maybe he did notice, but if he did, he never said anything about it.
“Never… I’ll see you in ten.”
And just like that he ended the call.
Sometimes you wondered what it would be like when he eventually got a girlfriend. Wonwoo is a good-looking guy, you’re surprised he hasn’t been snatched up yet. Not that you’re worried or anything, but… you know, things will surely change once he finds the one.
Maybe it was you being selfish, but you try to take advantage of the little time you have left before either one of you finds a partner. You know it’s bound to happen at some point, so might as well enjoy it while it lasts.
It actually took Wonwoo a little over thirty minutes to get to your place, which was weird considering you live pretty close to each other.
What was also weird was that he knocked. He never knocked anymore considering that he had a key to your place.
“Hey, what took you so-“ opening the door you were greeted with a slightly disheveled Wonwoo.
Oh.
Wonwoo’s hands were filled with plastic bags. You could see snacks poking out of through some of the bags and… regular groceries? What grocery store is open at this hour?
“Couldn’t come over empty handed.” He stated simply.
Before he stepped another foot you decided to help him with the load. You could imagine how tiring it must have been for him to carry the bags all the way to the third floor of your apartment building.
Seeing him like this felt oddly comforting. It looked like he was just returning home from a long day at work.
“You really didn’t have to Won…” As much as you liked to play it cool, you couldn’t help but swoon over his actions. It was hard to when he was just so caring.
“But I wanted to… everything I do is by my own will you know,” he softly smiled at you while ruffling your hair.
Before you were able to respond, he quickly offered you your favorite bag of chips.
“Sit down, I’ll put everything away.”
And just like that, he quickly went to work. It helped that he knew where everything went so it didn’t take him long before he joined you on the sofa.
“So… rough night?” He asked gently, despite being so bold through the phone. Seeing your defeated face always put a sour taste in his mouth, which made him more careful with his words.
“You could say that.” You tried to laugh it off, but he knew that you were bothered.
“I know dealing with your family is hard but just know that I’m always here for you.” He lightly grabbed your hands over to his, rubbing soft circles over your palms.
This always seemed to do the trick, seeing your tense shoulders drop into a more relaxed position.
“And I’m grateful for that Won… but sometimes it really gets to me you know?” You tried avoiding looking into his eyes because you knew that one look would break the dam building up in your eyes.
“Maybe she is right… maybe I am being too unreasonable. Like as much as I like to think that the right guy will come through one day… what if he doesn’t?”
This seemed to annoy Wonwoo. He never wanted to see you settle for less, because he knew that you deserved better.
With a sharp inhale, he grabbed your chin to make you look directly into his eyes.
“Never say that again. You should never settle for less. You know better than that.” He was obviously annoyed but not at you. He hated when others tried to make you take less than what you truly deserve.
His fingers on your chin stayed, making your skin slightly tingle from his touch.
As great as he was at comforting you, the thoughts of him someday not being able to be there for you started to cloud your mind. It was bound to happen, either you or Wonwoo would find someone and eventually stop hanging out. Wonwoo seemed to notice the shift in your sadness, eyes becoming glossy.
“There’s something you’re not telling me,” he muttered softly.
“It’s nothing,” you weren’t sure if he actually heard your response since it was barely audible to you.
Wonwoo gave you that look. The one he always used when he wasn’t convinced by your responses. You didn't want to tell him about your fear because it would then expose your feelings for him. And that was one thing you could never risk, your friendship. No matter how strong your feelings would get, you couldn't let him become aware of them.
“Talk to me,” his eyes were pleading. He just wanted you to completely open up to him the way he did with you.
There was no way out of this. Obviously, you weren’t going to tell him the actual reason behind your sadness. You had to give him something to get him off your trail.
“Well, it’s just that sometimes it does feel lonely. And having my mom point out the obvious makes me feel like a lost cause. I’m also not getting any younger, so now I feel like I have to rush into something or else my ‘good’ years would have gone to waste…” While this wasn’t the actual thing that was bothering you tonight, it was at least something believable.
Wonwoo seemed to have bought it, since he stopped giving you those judging eyes. He stayed quiet, most likely trying to find the right thing to say.
He cleared his throat after a beat or so.
“Don’t lie to me. I know there’s something else bothering you, if you don’t want to tell me then just say that.”
How? How did he know you that you were lying?
Maybe this was your chance. Your chance to tell him how you felt about it because if you truly thought about it, there was no future with him either way. Either he rejects you or he finds someone, they both lead to you not being in his life in the future.
You took in deep breath, gathering all of your courage before speaking.
“If I tell you, please don’t judge me-“
He immediately cut you off, “Why would I judge you?”
“Please just let me finish, it’s already hard enough having to tell you.” Again, you avoided his eyes, fearful of seeing any sort of judgment in them.
“Look, I know we’ve been friends for a while now… and I’ve been so happy with that, I really have. It’s just that… one day we won’t have each other.”
As much as you tried not looking at him, your eyes landed on his. They looked solemn. You could already tell that he knew where the conversation was going.
“Eventually, we’ll have our own partners-” your voice was beginning to shake, becoming harder to hide your sadness.
“yn stop.” But before Wonwoo could get another word in, he softly pressed his lips against yours. His hands had snaked their way up to your neck, gently cradling your face. His touch was gentle, as if you were the most fragile thing in the world.
You were stunned, to say the least. Even as he pulled away, you couldn’t find any words to say. It was as if he had taken your breath away.
“I tried taking it slow, I really did, but I can’t continue seeing you like this. I like you yn, I really do. I was too scared of ruining our friendship so I didn't say anything, but I hate to see you think that no one wants you… because I do.”
You didn’t even notice you had started crying, only feeling Wonwoo's thumbs wipe your tears away.
He continued, “I’m not even sure if you feel the same way about me, but I really need you to know that you are not unloveable.”
It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off your shoulders. Especially now that you knew that Wonwoo liked you back, you felt elated.
Wonwoo on the other hand… felt terrified. While he didn’t regret confessing his feelings towards you, he was certainly scared. He didn’t even know if you reciprocated those same feelings. It also didn’t help that you were being quiet. The silence that was once comfortable to him was beginning to feel suffocating. But before his thoughts could escalate any further, your voice was able to snap him out of his daze.
“Do you really mean it?” You knew it was stupid to ask, considering Wonwoo was not the type to stay stuff like this without meaning it. But the little voice in your head didn’t buy it one bit, so you needed the reassurance to silence those thoughts.
Without hesitation, Wonwoo answered, “Of course.”
“Okay, well… I do too. Like you, that is…” Your face was beginning to burn up. This was so embarrassing. God, you felt like a teenager again, except this time you actually did get your happy ending.
But like the two idiots you were… you didn’t move a single inch. Were you supposed to hug? High-five? Kiss again? This has never happened to you before, either you rejected the guy or pretended that it never happened. What were you supposed to do?
“So….” Wonwoo’s voice was quiet and awkward.
To be fair, neither of you were expecting to confess to each other tonight. Obviously, now that you both know that you have mutual feelings for each other… the next step would be dating right? Or is that too soon? You have been friends for a while now so it wouldn't be that unreasonable... right?
Wonwoo grabbed a hold of your hand, weaving his fingers with yours. You could see the tips of his ears turn a bright pink before he cleared his throat.
“Do you… want to be my-” Wonwoo was visibly cringing as he said it out loud. It was a no brainer, but he still wanted to ask you, to make it official.
“-Yes. I would be an idiot to say no.”
[ᝰ.ᐟ] hey guys! i know i haven’t been active lately and i’m really sorry about that. school has been so overwhelming for me so i struggled finding the time to write, which brings us to this! i wrote this i think… last year? not too sure but i tried editing it a little but there might be some errors here and there so please excuse that 🥹 also i am still working on part three for Back for More so stay tuned for that!
#kyeomofhearts#svthub#luv!writes#wonwoo scenarios#wonwoo x reader#jeon wonwoo#wonwoo fic#wonwoo fanfic#wonwoo svt#seventeen#svt fanfic#svt x reader#svt fic#svt imagines#svt fluff#svt#wonwoo imagines#svt scenarios#kpop fic#kpop fluff
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𝒂 𝒘𝒐𝒏𝒖𝒔𝒕𝒂𝒓𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒏𝒕𝒆𝒓 𝒊𝒏𝒅𝒐𝒐𝒓𝒔 𝜗𝜚
* 。·:*:·゚★ 𝑗𝑒𝑜𝑛 𝑤𝑜𝑛𝑤𝑜𝑜, 𝑝𝑒𝑎𝑐ℎ 𝑟𝑎𝑠𝑝𝑏𝑒𝑟𝑟𝑦 𝑖𝑐𝑒, ℎ𝑜𝑡 𝑐ℎ𝑜𝑐𝑜𝑙𝑎𝑡𝑒 𝑤𝑖𝑡ℎ 𝑚𝑎𝑟𝑠ℎ𝑚𝑎𝑙𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑠, 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝑙𝑜𝑡𝑢𝑠 𝑓𝑙𝑜𝑤𝑒𝑟𝑠. 𝑤𝑜𝑛𝑢𝑠𝑡𝑎𝑟'𝑠 𝑓𝑎𝑣𝑜𝑢𝑟𝑖𝑡𝑒 𝑡ℎ𝑖𝑛𝑔𝑠 𝑛𝑒𝑣𝑒𝑟 𝑐ℎ𝑎𝑛𝑔𝑒𝑑.
𝜗𝜚 𝗐𝖾𝗅𝖼𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗐𝗈𝗇𝗎𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗋'𝗌 𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗆𝖺𝗌𝗍𝖾𝗋𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗍! 𝗈𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝖾𝗏𝖾𝗇𝗂𝗇𝗀'𝗌 𝖼𝗁𝖾𝖼𝗄𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍, 𝗐𝖾 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝖾𝖾 𝗌𝗉𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗅 𝗂𝗇𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗆𝗒 𝖿𝖺𝗏𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗂𝗍𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗂𝖾𝗌 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖼𝗈𝗎𝗉𝗅𝖾𝗌 ♡ 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘱𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 𝘤𝘩𝘳𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘮𝘢𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘴𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯, 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮 2-5𝘬 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘥𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘦𝘯𝘨𝘵𝘩! 𝗂 𝗁𝖺𝗏𝖾 𝗇𝗈 𝗌𝖾𝗍 𝖽𝗎𝖾 𝖽𝖺𝗍𝖾𝗌 𝗌𝗈 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾𝖿𝗎𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗒𝗈𝗎'𝗅𝗅 𝖻𝖾 𝗉𝖺𝗍𝗂𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗆𝖾 𝗐𝗁𝗂𝗅𝖾 𝗂 𝖼𝗁𝗎𝗋𝗇 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾𝗌𝖾 𝗆𝗂𝗇𝗂 𝗈𝗇𝖾-𝗌𝗁𝗈𝗍𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎 𝗍𝗈 𝖾𝗇𝗃𝗈𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝗋𝗈𝗎𝗀𝗁 𝗈𝗎𝗍 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗆𝗈𝗇𝗍𝗁𝗌 ♡
𝜗𝜚 𝖻𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖿𝖺𝗏𝗈𝗎𝗋𝗂𝗍𝖾 𝗆𝗎𝗀, 𝖺 𝖿𝗎𝗓𝗓𝗒 𝖻𝗅𝖺𝗇𝗄𝖾𝗍 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝖾𝗑𝗉𝗅𝗈𝗋𝖾 𝗐𝗈𝗇𝗎𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗋𝗌𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖾 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗆𝖾 ♡ 𝜗𝜚 𝖺/𝗇: 𝗌𝗉𝖾𝖼𝗂𝖺𝗅 𝗍𝗁𝖺𝗇𝗄𝗌 𝗍𝗈 @monamipencil 𝖺𝗇𝖽 @ylangelegy 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗁𝖾𝗅𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗐𝗂𝗍𝗁 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗐𝗁𝖾𝗇 𝗂 𝗇𝖾𝖾𝖽𝖾𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗌𝗌𝗎𝗋𝖺𝗇𝖼𝖾 𝗁𝖾𝗁𝖾 ♡
masterlist, 𝗃𝗈𝗂𝗇 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗍𝖺𝗀𝗅𝗂𝗌𝗍!
take a look at each bonus scene below the cut!
. ꒷⊹ 𝖸𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝖢𝖺𝗍 𝖫𝗈𝗏𝖾𝗌 𝖸𝗈𝗎 (𝖥𝗍. 𝖭𝗈𝗋𝖻𝖾𝗋𝗍)
᯽ 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 1. 𝘢 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘤𝘶𝘱 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘰𝘵 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘤𝘰𝘭𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘸𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘳𝘺 𝘮𝘶𝘨. 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘴𝘦𝘩𝘶𝘴𝘣𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝗌𝖼𝖾𝗇𝖾: 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝖻𝖾𝗋𝗍 𝗏𝗌 𝗄𝗂𝗆 𝗆𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗒𝗎.
𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦!
𝜗𝜚 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝗄𝗂𝗆 𝗆𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗒𝗎 𝗑 𝖿.𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝜗𝜚 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝗋𝖾: 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿, 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄, 𝗇𝗈𝗋𝖻𝖾𝗋𝗍'𝗌 𝗉𝗈𝗏 𝜗𝜚 𝗌𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌: 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘳𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘯𝘰𝘳𝘣𝘦𝘳𝘵'𝘴 𝘦𝘺𝘦𝘴. (𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥/𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥!) 𝜗𝜚 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 (post date: ~𝖽𝖾𝖼. 24)
. ꒷⊹ 𝖫𝗈𝗏𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝖪𝖾𝖾𝗉 𝖬𝖾 𝖶𝖺𝗋𝗆
᯽ 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 2. 𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘬𝘦𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘤𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦. 𝘳𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦: 𝘢 𝘤𝘢𝘣𝘪𝘯 𝘨𝘦𝘵𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺.
𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦!
𝜗𝜚 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝗄𝗐𝗈𝗇 𝗌𝗈𝗈𝗇𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗀 𝗑 𝖿.𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝜗𝜚 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝗋𝖾: 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿, 𝗌𝗆𝗎𝗍 (𝖱: 18+, 𝗆𝖽𝗇𝗂!) 𝜗𝜚 𝗌𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌: 𝗌𝗈𝗈𝗇𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗇𝗀 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗇𝗌 𝖺 𝗐𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋 𝗀𝖾𝗍𝖺𝗐𝖺𝗒 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗈𝗇𝖾 𝗒𝖾𝖺𝗋 𝖺𝗇𝗇𝗂𝗏𝖾𝗋𝗌𝖺𝗋𝗒. (𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥/𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥!) 𝜗𝜚 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 (post date: tba)
. ꒷⊹ 𝖲𝗎𝗋𝖾 𝖳𝗁𝗂𝗇𝗀
᯽ 𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘱 3. 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘳𝘰𝘮-𝘤𝘰𝘮 𝘤𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘪𝘤 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘢𝘵𝘤𝘩 𝘣𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦. 𝘪𝘯 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘴𝘤𝘦𝘯𝘦: 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘣𝘦𝘨𝘪𝘯𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴.
𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘪𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘭 𝘴𝘵𝘰𝘳𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦!
𝜗𝜚 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀: 𝗃𝖾𝗈𝗇 𝗐𝗈𝗇𝗐𝗈𝗈 𝗑 𝖿.𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 𝜗𝜚 𝗀𝖾𝗇𝗋𝖾: 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿, 𝗌𝗆𝗎𝗍 (𝖱:18+, 𝗆𝖽𝗇𝗂!) 𝜗𝜚 𝗌𝗒𝗇𝗈𝗉𝗌𝗂𝗌: 𝖺 𝗌𝖾𝖼𝗋𝖾𝗍 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝖿𝗂𝗇𝖺𝗅 𝗂𝗇𝗌𝗍𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍! (𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘸𝘢𝘳𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥/𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘮𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘢𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥!) 𝜗𝜚 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘰𝘯𝘶𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘤 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 (post date: tba)
a/n: hello!! didn't think you would see me so soon right? heheh this is my first event on this blog and im so excited to share a little bit more about these wonderful characters that i hold dear to my heart! its gonna be fluff and (some) smut! if u want to be added to the taglist please fill out the form at the top of the page, thank you and see u soon! - anna ♡
p.s. don't be a stranger! come chat w me thru my inbox ໒꒰ྀི´ ˘ ` ꒱ྀིა
#seventeen smut#svthub#wonwoo smut#soonyoung smut#thediamondlifenetwork#seventeen fic#seventeen x reader#mingyu fluff#wonwoo x reader#soonyoung x reader#mingyu x reader#svt smut#svt fic#wonwoo fic#soonyoung fic#hoshi smut#seventeen imagines#seventeen fanfic#svt fanfic#svt fluff#seventeen fluff
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🍪last christmas - y. jeonghan☕
y. jeonghan x gn!reader
december with seventeen ! 2/13 tags: jeonghan x reader, jeonghan fluff, seventeen fanfiction, holiday au, ex au, christmas love story, fluff, bittersweet love, exes to lovers(?), happy ending, romance, reader insert, cozy vibes. kisses (mwuah) genre: romance, fluff, christmas, holiday au, slice of life, really mild angst warnings: none (it’s pretty wholesome, so unless you have themes of anxiety or past trauma you have with past relationships, there should be no need for any major warnings) wc: 3050 (xp) a/n: 2/13 ! 11 to go =] PLAY LAST CHRISTMAS BY ARIANA GRANDE (her ver.) RN !
the festive glow of the christmas market wrapped around you like a warm hug, but tonight, the warmth felt bittersweet. the familiar stalls with twinkling lights and the scent of cinnamon in the air stirred memories you had tried to bury for the past year.
walking through the bustling crowd, you hadn’t expected to see him again. yet there he was, standing at a gingerbread stall, his profile illuminated by the golden light of a nearby lantern. jeonghan.
he looked the same and yet… not. his long coat flared slightly with the evening breeze, and his hair fell in soft waves, framing his face perfectly. for a moment, you froze, unsure whether to approach or slip away unnoticed. but as if he could sense you, his gaze shifted, locking onto yours.
“y/n,” he said, his voice carrying easily over the noise of the crowd. there was no mistaking the surprise—and something softer—in his tone.
you managed a polite smile, your heart doing an unwelcome flip. “hey, jeonghan.”
“it’s been a while,” he said, his lips curving into a small smile as he stepped closer. “how have you been?”
“good,” you replied curtly, though the word felt hollow. “you?”
“better now,” he said smoothly, and you could’ve sworn his eyes sparkled with mischief, just like they used to. “how’s your sweet tooth holding up?”
your brows furrowed, and then he nodded toward the gingerbread stall. “remember how you used to drag me here for those cookies?” he asked, his smile widening at your obvious surprise. “they still sell them, you know.”
“you remember that?” you asked, the words slipping out before you could stop them.
he laughed softly, a sound that felt like a warm breeze in the cold air. “of course i do. i remember a lot of things.”
the weight of his words hung between you, and for a moment, you both stood there, caught in the push and pull of shared history.
“want one?” he asked, gesturing to the stall. “my treat.”
against your better judgment, you found yourself nodding.
minutes later, the two of you were wandering through the market together, gingerbread cookies in hand. the conversation was light at first, filled with comments about the stalls and the crisp winter air. but every so often, his gaze would linger on you a moment too long, and you’d feel the familiar tug of emotions you thought you’d moved past.
when you stopped at a stall selling handcrafted trinkets, your breath hitched. this was the same stall where jeonghan had bought you a small snow globe last year—a delicate thing with a tiny couple standing under a snow-laden tree. you still had it, tucked away in a drawer because you couldn’t bring yourself to throw it out.
“y/n,” he said softly, pulling you out of your thoughts. “wait here for a second.”
before you could respond, he’d slipped away to speak with the vendor. moments later, he returned, holding a small box wrapped in festive paper.
“what’s this?” you asked, narrowing your eyes.
“just open it,” he said, his smile soft and almost… shy?
you hesitated but eventually unwrapped the box. inside was a tiny ornament—a snowflake carved out of wood, intricate and beautiful. your chest tightened as you realized it was from the same vendor who had made the snow globe.
“i saw it and thought of you,” jeonghan said, his voice quiet. “you used to love snowflakes, remember?”
“i… yeah, i do,” you murmured, running your fingers over the smooth edges of the ornament.
“i know i messed up last year,” he said suddenly, his tone turning serious. “but i’ve been thinking a lot about us, about what went wrong. and if there’s even a small chance you’d let me make it up to you, i’d take it.”
you stared at him, his words leaving you momentarily speechless. the market buzzed around you, a blur of lights and laughter, but all you could focus on was him—the sincerity in his eyes, the vulnerability in his posture.
“it’s not that simple, jeonghan,” you finally said, your voice barely above a whisper. “we can’t just pick up where we left off.”
“i know,” he said, nodding. “i’m not asking for that. but maybe… we could start fresh? as friends, even. just… give me a chance to prove that i’ve changed.”
his words hung in the air, and for the first time in a long while, you felt a flicker of hope—small and fragile, but there.
“we’ll see,” you said cautiously, though a small smile tugged at your lips.
jeonghan’s face lit up, and he reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair from your face. “that’s all i’m asking for.”
as the snow began to fall softly around you, the festive glow of the market grew even more magical, with each snowflake dancing in the air before settling on the ground. the cold, however, was beginning to bite, and you shivered slightly, rubbing your hands together for warmth.
jeonghan, noticing your discomfort, glanced down at you before shrugging off his long coat. "here," he said, draping it over your shoulders before you could protest. despite the warmth of his coat, you could feel the chill on his face, his breath visible in the cold night air.
"you'll freeze," you pointed out, though you couldn't deny how nice it felt to have something warm around you.
he smiled, though there was a slight tremble in his voice. "i'm fine. i've survived worse."
the two of you continued walking, your steps crunching in the snow, your arms brushing occasionally as you moved together through the market. you glanced over at jeonghan, but he seemed lost in thought, his gaze far off, distant. you weren’t sure what to make of the silence between you two—whether it was comfortable or uncomfortable—but before you could dwell on it, you felt his hand brush yours again. this time, it lingered for a split second, just enough for a jolt of warmth to shoot through your fingers.
your heart skipped, and you looked up to see him looking at you, his eyes momentarily soft. he cleared his throat, breaking the spell. "cold, huh?" he muttered.
"just a bit," you replied, your breath puffing in the air.
you continued walking, but there was a newfound tension between you, something unspoken but palpable. the moment lingered, filling the air with a subtle kind of anticipation.
when you reached a hot cocoa stand, jeonghan stopped in front of it, his hand reaching for his wallet. "hot chocolate?" he asked, voice light again, as if the brief moment of vulnerability had never happened. you nodded, though you couldn't shake the feeling that he was trying to keep things casual.
"let me at least be useful for once," he said with a small chuckle as he handed over the money, his eyes still carrying that same mixture of humor and regret.
you raised an eyebrow. "you're always useful," you teased, though the joke felt strangely hollow in the moment.
he smiled at you, but there was something wistful in the way his lips curled. he handed you your cocoa, and you both stood there for a moment, sipping in comfortable silence, the snow continuing to fall around you like soft whispers of the past.
as you both stood there, the cold seemed to settle deeper, the warmth of the cocoa barely enough to chase it away. your eyes flicked to jeonghan, who was rubbing his hands together to warm them up. without thinking, you reached for your scarf, unraveling it from your neck and holding it up between you.
"here," you said softly, your fingers brushing his as you pulled him closer, wrapping the scarf around his neck. his breath caught for a moment as you tugged him gently toward you, your fingers grazing the soft fabric of his coat as you adjusted the scarf to fit snugly.
jeonghan's eyes widened, a flicker of surprise flashing across his face, but it quickly softened into something more tender. "you sure?" he asked, his voice low, almost shy.
"yeah," you replied, your voice barely a whisper as you let the scarf rest around him. you couldn't help but notice how close he was now, his warmth mixing with yours in the cold night air. his breath mingled with yours, and for a heartbeat, the world seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you.
he smiled, his eyes softening as he met your gaze. "thank you," he murmured, the words carrying more weight than they should.
you swallowed, trying to ignore the flutter in your chest. "no problem," you said, voice barely steady as you pulled away, but not too far. "just... don’t freeze, okay?"
he chuckled, the sound quiet but full of something unspoken. "i’ll be fine with you looking out for me."
you both fell into a comfortable silence, walking through the market side by side, the scarf between you like a quiet promise.
as you two wandered further into the market, the atmosphere seemed to shift—quieter, more intimate. the noise of the crowd faded, replaced by the soft crunch of snow beneath your feet and the gentle hum of christmas songs playing from a nearby speaker. the air felt different here, as if the world had narrowed down to just the two of you.
you found yourself under a canopy of twinkling christmas lights, their soft glow reflecting off the snow and casting a warm, golden hue around you. everything felt more magical in the moment, as though the lights were pulling you closer together.
you looked up at the lights, your heart beating a little faster, when you felt his fingers brush against yours. at first, it was a simple, fleeting touch, but then his hand lingered, and he gave a gentle tug, silently asking for you to hold his hand.
your breath hitched, your pulse quickening as you turned to meet his gaze. his eyes were soft, but there was something deeper there—something almost unreadable, like he was waiting for you to make the next move. his fingers curled around yours, steady and sure this time, as if he was no longer afraid of what this moment might mean.
you didn't pull away. instead, you let the warmth of his hand seep into yours, your heart fluttering in your chest. the world seemed to hold its breath as you both stood there, a thousand unspoken words hanging in the air between you.
"y/n," he said softly, his voice low, as if he was testing the weight of your name on his lips again. "this... this feels different."
you nodded slowly, not trusting your voice, but the feeling in your chest told you everything you needed to know. this was different. this moment, under the soft glow of the lights, was something new. something more than what it had been before.
he squeezed your hand gently, as if reassuring himself that this was real. "i'm not asking for much," he continued, his words soft but filled with sincerity. "just... just a chance to make it right."
you let out a breath you hadn't realized you were holding. the world felt small, just the two of you, and for a moment, you wondered if maybe—just maybe—this was the start of something different.
you didn’t pull away, didn’t say anything more. you just held his hand, the connection between you both deepening in the silence that followed.
as you both continued strolling through the market, the twinkling lights overhead creating a soft glow around you, a new sense of ease seemed to settle between you. the tension from earlier, while still lingering, melted away with every laugh and playful comment shared between you two.
you stopped in front of a stall selling christmas hats, each one more ridiculous than the last. jeonghan picked up a red reindeer antler headband and placed it on your head with a dramatic flourish.
“perfect,” he said with a grin, stepping back to admire his handiwork. “now you’re ready for the holiday season.”
you rolled your eyes, but the warmth in your chest couldn't be ignored. you swatted playfully at him. “you look ridiculous,” you teased, picking up a matching pair of antlers for yourself.
“i look festive,” he shot back, adjusting the antlers on his head like a crown.
you both burst into laughter, your giggles mixing with the sounds of the market. it felt so easy, so light, like the weight of the past year had been temporarily forgotten under the glow of the christmas lights.
after a moment, you wandered over to a stall selling tiny christmas trees, each one covered in glitter and tinsel. jeonghan picked up a small tree and handed it to you with a wink. "for you," he said, voice filled with mischief.
"seriously?" you asked, raising an eyebrow, but your heart melted a little at his thoughtfulness.
"it’s a little tacky," he admitted, "but i think it suits you."
you rolled your eyes but couldn't help the smile that tugged at your lips. "you really know how to pick gifts," you teased, cradling the tree carefully as if it was precious.
he shrugged with a grin. "i try." then, without missing a beat, he leaned in and placed a soft kiss on your cheek. "merry christmas, y/n."
your heart fluttered at the unexpected gesture, and you laughed, a bit flustered. "you’re gonna make me sick with all this sweetness, jeonghan."
"that’s the point," he said, smiling that trademark mischievous smile you couldn’t help but fall for.
as the night grew colder, the two of you found your way to a hot cocoa stand, where jeonghan insisted on paying again. "this is the last one, i swear," he said, handing over the money with exaggerated seriousness.
"i’ll hold you to that," you teased, accepting the warm cup he offered.
as you walked together, sipping your cocoa and watching the snow fall gently around you, it felt like time slowed down. there was something magical about the night—the way his hand brushed against yours again, the way the air was thick with the scent of pine and cinnamon, the way you felt so incredibly... content.
eventually, the two of you found yourselves standing outside your apartment building, the night winding down but neither of you quite ready to let go just yet. the lights from the building cast a soft glow on his face as he turned to you, still holding your hand.
“well,” he said, his voice soft, “this is it. i guess i’ll have to walk away from all this magic.”
you couldn’t help the small smile that crept onto your face. “you know, it wasn’t so bad, this whole christmas thing.”
he laughed, but there was a hint of sincerity in his eyes as he reached into his pocket. “i had a feeling you might say that.”
he pulled out the small ornament, the snowflake from earlier, and handed it to you with a soft smile. “maybe we can try again next christmas… or sooner,” he said, his words carrying a weight you hadn’t expected.
you blinked, your heart skipping. you hadn’t expected him to say something so vulnerable, so hopeful.
he stepped closer, his eyes searching yours, and for a moment, neither of you spoke. just as he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours with that familiar tenderness, you surprised him by closing the gap yourself, pressing your lips softly to his.
he froze for a moment, eyes wide with surprise, but then he kissed you back, slow and gentle, the warmth between you building with each passing second.
when you pulled away, your foreheads resting together, he smiled, his eyes filled with something that was almost shy. "i’m glad you decided sooner," he murmured.
you smiled, your heart lighter than it had been in so long. "me too."
“stay?” you invited him softly, the words slipping out before you could stop them. you noticed you were still wearing his jacket, the warmth of it oddly comforting, as if it was a silent invitation. you turned away slightly, a bit shy, as if giving him the space to decide, but your heart raced with hope.
“it’s christmas tomorrow,” you added quietly, your voice barely above a whisper, but the weight of it lingered in the crisp air between you.
jeonghan couldn't help but smile at that, his eyes softening as they met yours. “of course,” he said, his voice low and tender. without hesitation, he stepped closer, his fingers gently tilting your chin up, his touch warm and reassuring. then, as if there was no need for further words, he leaned down and kissed you again.
the kiss deepened, slow and sweet, a promise wrapped in the soft press of his lips against yours. you melted into him, his hand resting on your waist, pulling you closer as the world outside faded into the background. everything that had led up to this moment felt like it was meant to be. when he finally pulled away, you were breathless, cheeks flushed, and your heart pounding in your chest.
somehow, the two of you ended up on your couch, his back against the cushions with him sitting beneath you. you were straddling his lap, his arms around you, holding you close. the space between you was filled with warmth and tenderness, like you'd both found your place again.
your voice was small, a quiet murmur as you rested your head against his shoulder. “don’t give my heart away again the next day,” you whispered, the words familiar and haunting, taken from a song that had once felt like an echo of your past. last christmas i gave you my heart, but the very next day, you gave it away.
jeonghan chuckled softly at that, the sound warm and full of affection. he tilted your face up to look at him, his eyes full of sincerity. “i never gave it away,” he said softly, his voice filled with conviction. then, as if to make sure you knew exactly what he meant, he kissed you again, his lips pressing against yours with a tenderness that left you breathless.
when he pulled away, he kept his gaze on you, his hand resting gently on your cheek. “it’s still in my heart,” he whispered, his words like a promise.
you smiled, feeling the warmth of his words settle deep within you. maybe this christmas would be the start of something new—something real, something lasting.
you leaned in to kiss him again, this time with a sense of peace and certainty. you were home, and this time, you weren’t letting go.
a/n: 2/13 ! i update everyday on 10:30 am (our timezones might be different though :]
december with seventeen ! - masterlist
#seventeen#svthub#seventeen ff#kstrucknet#seventeen fanfic#seventeen x reader#seventeen jeonghan#svt jeonghan#yoon jeonghan x reader#yoon jeonghan#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan#svt#jeonghan x y/n#svt x reader#seventeen fic#seventeen fluff#seventeen drabbles#seventeen x you#svt imagines#jeonghan imagines#jeonghan fluff#jeonghan x you#jeonghan fanfic#seventeen imagines#jeonghan drabbles#christmas seventeen#⋈ꕤଘ⋆๑⋈𓂅⋆-𓍼⌗ᯅ#°★ 🎀 𝒽🍬𝓃𝑒𝓎𝒽𝒶𝑒 𝓈𝓋𝓉 🎀 ★°#☆*: .。.ᓚᘏᗢ.。.:*☆~°★ 🎀 𝒽🍬𝓃𝑒𝓎𝒽𝒶𝑒-𝓈𝓋𝓉 🎀 ★°
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santa baby | 𝚢𝚓𝚑 two
✿ pairing: yoon jeonghan x fem!reader ✿ word count: 0.2k ✿ genre: fluff ✿ tags: high school au, crush au, class president!jeonghan ✿ synopsis: (28) paper stars + (29) "You're so cute I could just kiss you right now!" | request from this ask for my santa baby drabble game .ᐟ
It wasn't supposed to happen. At all.
One second, you were cutting out paper stars with Jeonghan in attendance, your classmate glueing what shapes you just cut up and placed in the pile next to you with intense vigor. The next, you were kissing, your back pressed to the desk and hands fumbling against his skin.
How did you get here?
Why did he have to make fun of your cutting skills in a way that made your heart race? Albiet some of the stars did look like mismatched little lumps of paper, but he didn't have to say it with such a lilt that created a lump in your throat.
Not even in your dreams, you thought as he kept teasing you mercilessly. He's the class president, you're an average student at best. He'll never go for you.
Yet, you could not fight the words that left your lips in the faintest of whispers. "You're so cute I could just kiss you right now," you mumbled, lips curled into a smile as you kept cutting the nteenth star for the Christmas banner.
Little did you expect Jeonghan to take the scissors out of your hands and press his lips to yours, both of your mouths molding perfectly to each other's.
"Why'd you do that?" You ask when the two of you part, your body still floating like a snowflake through the air.
"I knew you never would, so I had to take initiative. Especially when you gave me an invitation," he says with a smile.
santa baby drabble game ⋆⁺₊❅⋆ ⁺₊❆⋆
#svthub#kvanity#k-films#kstrucknet#keopihausnet#jeonghan x reader#jeonghan fic#jeonghan fics#yoon jeonghan x reader#yoon jeonghan fics#yoon jeonghan fic#seventeen x reader#seventeen fic#seventeen fics#svt x reader#svt fic#svt fics#[ lexi's works ]#[ lw - santa baby ]
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things you do that make svt bust quick (nsfw)
seungcheol —; tell him how good he’s doing
he’s a leo male… please stroke his ego.
tell him how you love his cock, how big he is, how it hits so deep inside you. tell him “right there,” and “keep going,” and to do it “just like that.”
stroke his possessive side too. tell him no one else can fuck you like he can, no one else can stretch you out so good, no one else can make you cum like he does. tell him that your pussy is made for him only.
be loud for him. god, he loves hearing you moan. say his name, beg for more, sob, whimper, gasp for him. don’t be shy about it. it’ll only be a matter of time before you butter him up enough to make him cum.
jeonghan —; beg
everyone knows yoon jeonghan likes having people at his mercy. he gets a little unhinged when he has power over someone—so imagine what he gets like when you’re writhing on his cock, gasping his name so sweetly, your eyes glimmering with tears as he fucks you hard.
“what is it, pretty?” he asks, and like the devil he is, he slows the movement of hips, pulling out of you until his tip barely kisses your also weeping hole. it’s torture for him too, to leave the hot, tight haven that is your cunt, but to him it’s worthwhile.
“wanna cum, hannie,” you whimper.
“hm… i don’t know if i should let you yet,” he says, dipping back inside just an inch. years of him being yours means you don’t miss the tiny strain in his voice that betrays his perfectly collected demeanour.
“please, hannie, please, please, please, let me cum. i’ve been so good,” you sob, squeezing your thighs where they rest on his hips.
you watch as a switch flips in his eyes within a millisecond. a grin lights up his face and he shudders, and he’s sliding back inside you, fucking in and out of you harder and faster than before. safe to say it doesn’t take long for either of you to cum after that.
joshua —; make eye contact
his pretty doe eyes make staring into them your favourite thing in the world, and if you asked him his favourite pastime, he’d tell you that it was gazing into your irises.
it’s also his biggest weakness. from the way you’ve got your mouth wrapped around his dick, throat gagging even though you’re only halfway down it, joshua feels his sanity slipping away. his fingers curl into the bedsheets below as he watches you work him, revels in the warmth of your tongue sliding up and down his shaft.
when your eyes flick up to meet his he doesn’t stand a chance. not with how glimmering they are, brimming softly with tears, yet swimming with adoration. with worship.
heat washes over his whole body, he’s gasping, and the salty warmth of his release pools on your tongue.
jun —; put his fingers in your mouth
when junhui gets inside you he has a one-track mind. he becomes rapt with pleasure, drunk from the warm squeeze of your pussy around him, focused on nothing but the sensation of you, the sight of you under him, the sound of you in his ears.
the effect you have on him is dangerous, because you’re equally obsessed with him as he is with you, and you’re not afraid to show him.
and you love his hands, he knows you do—knows how you love his slender fingers and their soft touches all over you, inside you. your brain is cloudy, fogged by lust when you take him by his wrist and bring his fingers to your mouth. your eyes sparkle as your lips wrap around his index finger, your soft tongue swirling around it.
jun’s mouth parts with awe, his eyes growing round. a second later, he stills inside you with a gasp of your name, like he’s praying to you, all the while you’re sucking on his finger like a devil.
hoshi —; scratch him
he’s a little bit of a freak, and a masochist too.
when he’s got you folded in half, hitting all the right spots inside you, you cling to him in every way you can—fingers grabbing at his biceps, his shoulders. one particular stroke of his hips has you squealing.
your nails sink into his skin, crying out his name as you rake them down the toned planes of his back. the second you do, soonyoung is grunting, hips stilling, cock twitching as a sticky warmth suddenly floods your cervix.
the worst part about it is how he always has the stupidest, most shit-eating smug grin on his face when he examines your damage in the bathroom after, and you know that if he could, he would post the selfies he takes in the mirror all over instagram. what’s even worse though? seeing your marks makes him hard again.
wonwoo —; cry
you’re such a sensitive little thing and wonwoo adores you. one orgasm on his fingers and you’re already overstimulated—“but baby, i haven’t even put my cock in you yet,” he’ll coo.
like it’s your fault you have a boyfriend with skilled fingers and a skilled tongue and who knows you inside and out like the back of his hand, who knows where to touch you and how hard and what pace makes you writhe the most.
by the time he does get inside you, you’re gasping and whining and clawing at him, tears springing to your eyes because he’s so big and so deep, but the stretch is so addictive that it’s dizzying. his voice is low and husky as he mutters to you a mixture of teases and praise, calls you his pretty girl and then laughs at sensitive you are, pretends he’s not on the verge of coming from the sound of your choked gasps.
your belly starts to pulse with that familiar heat and by then you’re keening for him, whimpering a mixture of his name and endless pleas as it starts to become too much. your sobs go straight to his cock, and it’s only a matter of time before he reaches his climax, and his gasps of pleasure harmonise with your own cries.
woozi —; pull his hair
he’s been growing his hair out. after all your begging, he finally listened. in a way, though, it’s backfired a little on you, because the longer it gets the more insane you become. and the thing is you never expected him to let it get to his shoulders—and still he doesn’t plan on cutting it. well, good. you would kill him if he did.
when his face is between your legs you’re nothing short of a feral animal—your hips bucking wild against his mouth, your legs trembling on his shoulders, your fingers, of course, grabbing fistfuls of his hair. he makes you whine when he pulls away from your needy, sticky cunt to tsk at you, tells you to cut it out and keep your hands to yourself. (it’s because he’s about to cream his pants).
when he bends you in half beneath him, ruts into you hard and fast and relentless, you need leverage. your hands land on the back of his neck, fingertips grazing at his roots, then one slam of his hips into yours has his cock bumping against the most sensitive spot inside you and your grasping at his hair and crying his name so desperately. no longer can he hold back, strained groans slipping past his lips as he lets go inside you.
dokyeom —; hold his hand
a sentimental sweetheart, seokmin is an utter romantic who thinks that being inside of you, whether in your mouth or your pussy, is intimacy in its purest form. now imagine showing him just how much more intimate things can get.
he’s losing his mind at the feeling of your tongue swirling around the head of his cock, the way you swallow his length down making him see stars. he can’t bare to look at you—he needs to focus on taking deep breaths so that he doesn’t cum straight down your throat. then he feels you grabbing at one of his hands, lacing your fingers together, and no amount of deep breathing can stop him from releasing.
and when he fucks you it’s no different—it’s him in near tears, whimpering your name between incoherent words over and over, and as soon as you take his hand in yours and your fingers wrap around his, there’s nothing else he can do but succumb to his own pleasure.
mingyu —; take control
he’s big and strong; strong enough to put you into whatever position he wants, to make you cum at his command, to do just as he pleases with you.
but that’s exactly why he likes it when you slap him around a little.
you can’t exactly bend him into doggy or use your weight to keep him pinned to the mattress, but you can sit yourself pretty on his cock and ride him teasingly slow. you can tell him he’s not allowed to touch you or you’ll stop moving. you can tell him to kiss you, to go slower, to go harder.
you can sit up and put a hand around his throat, still your hips, and tell him he can fuck you himself if he wants to cum. and he’ll do just that—and as soon as you utter the words, he’s gone, whining out curses as he fills you up in white, warm spurts.
minghao —; whisper in his ear
minghao often tells you how he adores your voice. when you talk to him he’s entranced, and he’s always been more of a listener than a talker, and it’s perfect because you always have so much to say, and minghao will listen to every last word of yours.
your voice—minghao’s kryptonite, his achilles’ heel, his undoing and, oh, the way you moan for him when he’s got you on his cock is enough to make his heart stop beating. the perverted part of him wishes he could record you, hide the file away on his phone and listen to you when he’s overseas and he can’t call you. maybe he’ll ask you about that, if he can find the courage.
the final blow is when you’re getting close. you lean in, right next to his ear, so close that your breath sends shivers along his skin. “please, hao, i’m so close,” you whisper, yet you still sound so desperate and depraved. “you are too, right? cum for me, please. i’ll cum for you too.”
so he does just that—minghao gives in and lets his orgasm wash over him, fingertips drawing circles on your clit until mere moments later he hears the sound of your own cresting pleasure and he feels himself getting hard again.
seungkwan —; wrap your legs around him
it’s a fact that seungkwan loves to be close to you. if he could, he would crawl inside of your skin and live in your heart. but since he can’t, constant physical touch is the next best thing.
he likes to think he has relatively good self-control…most of the time. like when he’s buried to the hilt inside you, he’s incredible at keeping in rhythm, fucking into you at the most perfect pace for both you and him, hitting the spot that makes your back arch off the bed.
somehow he never sees it coming—when your arms are snaked around his neck and you’re holding onto him for dear life as he takes you to heaven, and your legs wrap around his waist so that you can pull him in impossibly deep. then you bring his face to yours, and you have the most irresistible little pout on your face when you make your request. “cum inside me, seungkwannie?”
and it’s not like he has much choice with the way you’ve trapped him inside of you, but that’s the very reason why the next second he’s pumping you full, because when it’s you, how is he supposed to have any self-control?
vernon —; touch yourself
it’s not like vernon can last long in general. he thinks you’re the hottest thing alive and he’s so enamoured with you that it’s too much for him sometimes, but you best believe he’ll put his all into holding out just for you.
there are times, however, where he’s just a man. and what’s a man to do when he has a goddess riding his dick? when your tits look so pretty, bouncing in his face, when you have that fucked out look in your eyes, when you feel like heaven and hell all at once?
and what the fuck is a man to do when your hand drifts down between your legs, to your aching clit, and your fingers start to rub it in circles, or when your other hand grasps one of your tits and tugs at one of your own nipples? and your sweet pussy clenches around him so tight when you do, clamps down on him in an hot, wet embrace, so what else can he do but cum?
dino —; say ‘i love you’
another sweet, sentimental boy. lee chan is head over heels for you, enamoured, obsessed, smitten, infatuated with you… the list of things he is around you is endless.
it shows in the way he fucks you—always takes his time with you, never rushes taking you apart. every touch of his is intentional, meant to set you both ablaze. when he eats you out to prep you for his cock, he has to try not to cum in his pants from how pretty you are.
where he really doesn’t stand a chance however is when he’s bottomed out inside you, as close as he can possibly be with you—so close you’re practically one. the sweetest sounds fall from your lips, spurring on his expert thrusts.
his forehead is plastered to yours, the pair of you revelling in one another’s sweat and gasps for air. “i love you,” you confess gently, and chan falls over the edge of pleasure not a moment later.
#svthub#seventeen smut#svt smut#scoups smut#jeonghan smut#joshua smut#jun smut#junhui smut#hoshi smut#wonwoo smut#woozi smut#dokyeom smut#dk smut#mingyu smut#minghao smut#seungkwan smut#vernon smut#dino smut#scoups x reader#jeonghan x reader#joshua x reader#jun x reader#junhui x reader#hoshi x reader#wonwoo x reader#woozi x reader#dokyeom x reader#dk x reader#mingyu x reader#minghao x reader
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Too Many Beds (Choi Seungcheol)
Reverse Trope Series Installement 1
Pairing - Choi Seungcheol x afab! Reader
Word Count- 13k (don't ask me how I thought I could do this in 2k)
Genre - Enemies to lovers? Frenemies to lovers? Lovers to lovers? Idk man, these two are idiots, that's all. Oh and smut.
Warnings - one mention of blood cause of intense make out wew, other smut warnings under the cut!
A/n - I'm trying to do a Reverse Trope one shot series for all seventeen members, first up Choi Seungcheol :) Next up is 'Accidentally Kidnapping A Mafia Boss' Ft. Yoon Jeonghan hehe send me an ask/message to be tagged in that! Or you can also drop a comment when I drop the teaser in a few days!
Smut warnings - oral (m and f receiving), fingering, brief face fucking, thick dick cheol lol, slight choking, allusions to a breeding kink, unprotected sex (these two are digustingly in love, extremely horny and highly irresponsible, please don't be like them), creampie, mention of the word slut like once, and I'm hoping that's all?
“Absolutely not.”
“No way in hell.”
Seungcheol glared at you as you narrowed your eyes at him.
“I’m not sharing a room with him.”
“I refuse to even breathe in her vicinity.”
“Then maybe I should do mankind a service by being around you more.”
“The only way you can help mankind is by shutting your mouth.” Seungcheol leaned closer, his voice dropping. “You’re not pretty enough for all the stupidity that comes out of it.”
You rolled your eyes. “Rich coming from you. If I had a face like yours, I’d sue my parents.”
“Aw, fifth graders can insult better than you, sweetheart.”
“That was a fact, darling.”
“Ah” The two of you turned to the receptionist, finally remembering her presence as her eyes flickered between you and Seungcheol. “So, the two of you are dating?”
Looking at her incredulously and with unadulterated disgust, the two of you immediately took a step back.
“No!”
“No!”
“I’d rather stub my pinky toe on furniture everyday than date her-”
“And I’d rather choke on my own spit everyday than date him-”
“Oh baby, I knew you were a desperate one. I can give you something better to choke on-”
“Honey, are you sure? I heard you can stack fruit loops on that skinny thing-”
“Enough!” The old woman behind the counter got to her feet, putting her hands on her hips, the never-ending squabbling finally getting to her. “If either of you say another word, I will personally put you both in the tiniest broom closet I can find and trust me, the ones in this lodge are devastatingly small.”
You immediately shut up, dreading that idea more than anything. Seungcheol too became uncharacteristically and thankfully, quiet.
“Now, as far as your room is concerned, your company booked only one room, number-” She glanced at the paper in her hand and pulled out a pair of keys from the drawer. “- 68. If you can bear each other for 4 nights, well and good, get moving. If not, then take your things and get out of here. Good luck finding another lodge in this miserable weather.”
And as though on cue, a bright light, followed by a loud thunder flooded the room, taking all three of its inhabitants aback.
From the corner of your eye, you saw Seungcheol visibly gulp, well aware of his fear of thunder. Seungcheol too heard the way you sniffled, knowing that your rhinitis would only get worse with the humidity rising outside.
Sighing with the realization that there was no way out of this, both of you reached for the keys at the same time, making the old woman snatch it faster than the damn lightning to avoid yet another fight from breaking out. Ringing for the bellboy, she handed him the keys before he took your suitcase and Seungcheol’s bag in each hand, leading the way to your despair of the night.
Seungcheol followed quietly behind you, hands tucked in his pocket, his large headphones perched on his head as he swayed to the music, blatantly ignoring you. You were thankful for that. Since you were little children, you had always craved moments where you could pretend like this man didn’t exist. Why wouldn’t you? Everything about him was a pain in your ass.
You first met Seungcheol when you were five. Your fathers were college mates turned business partners and coincidentally, your mothers were best friends since high school. Naturally, everyone expected the children of both families to be just as close as their parents but alas, even at the age of five, you could not bear him for more than five minutes. He was so aggressive and unruly, always messing up your dolls, always pulling your hair, never giving you a second of peace when he was around. Albeit that behaviour got milder over the years but there were other things now.
Like the fact that your father always preferred to have a boy, a son who could be his heir, someone like Seungcheol. It wasn’t like he didn’t love you but a different side of him came out every time Seungcheol was around, a side not even you could bring out. He would laugh louder, his eyes would shine more, he would seem so carefree. Seungcheol too never missed the chance to rub that on your face, constantly sneering and claiming that your father would be happier if he was a part of the family.
Over the years, your displeasure and annoyance at Seungcheol only grew into a deep dislike. As though it wasn’t enough that the two of you did your entire schooling together (yes, all twelve years of it), he was always present anywhere and everywhere you went - the debate club, the swim team, the dance academy, the cafes, the libraries, the movies - there was no place you were free of him. Ever since you were young, you had longed to escape to a place far away from home just to be carefree and explore and reinvent yourself without the constant looming of a figment of your past. You had hoped that at least after school you’d have the chance to go away from him but as your luck would have it, the two of you were accepted into the same business school, were interning in the same company, were working on the same project, and had come out of town for the same three-day conference together. It was one thing to have to bear this man’s presence all day, now you had to do it all night as well, thanks to your cheapskate company.
As you got in the lift Seungcheol held the doors open for you before settling in the corner opposite yours, keeping as much distance in between as possible. The bell boy looked at both of you confused.
“I thought the two of you are dating?”
You groaned, rolling your eyes, and fished out your phone, scrolling through it instead.
Seungcheol glanced at you before scoffing at the absurd idea of dating you. He wasn’t foreign to that doubt though – people often wondered if they were together and Seungcheol wondered what on earth they saw between them that even resembled a speck of liking or even tolerance for one another.
Seungcheol had honestly not met anyone as stuck up as you. He never understood why his parents constantly considered you as the ideal role model for their son - ‘Look Cheol, she joined debate, you should too’, ‘She got selected in the swim team, you should try Cheol.’, ‘What do you think about dancing Cheol? She’s really good at it.’. Seungcheol was sick of being dragged into everything you were in, only to always be second. He hated debates, he would rather play football than swim, and though he liked to dance, ever since he joined the academy with you, even dancing was not giving him any solace.
Yet he gave his best all the time. He tried and tried and tried but he was always second to you who was evidently a natural at everything. For example, back in the school days, Seungcheol would almost get the same grades as you but at the cost of sacrificing nights of sleep and putting hours and hours into teaching himself. Meanwhile, you would breeze through the notes a day before the test, get a full 8-hour sleep and still score higher than him. As if that wasn’t enough, you’d invite him home, offering to “tutor” him only to constantly berate him about his ignorance, drop snide comments about how you were better, subtly challenge him in a battle that the both of you were well aware he could not win.
No wonder you had no friends while Seungcheol was as popular as could be - who would even want to be friends with you when you were always so cold and condescending towards anything that moved or breathed. If your parents weren’t joined at the hip, forcing Seungcheol to be a constant presence in your life, he wondered who would ever even talk to you? You should have been thankful for him, that he was the one human presence in your life who was always there despite it all, yet you treated him like he was beneath you. He had hoped that at least after graduating the two of you could part ways but the universe apparently loved playing cosmic jokes, putting the two of you together yet again, at the same workplace. And completely up in each other’s space for the next few days as well.
It wasn’t like the two of you hadn’t ever shared a room before - whenever your parents would meet up at each other’s house to drink and talk all night, the two of you had no choice but to crash in the same room, sharing the same bed even but thank God it was usually queen size, allowing the both of you to take two opposite ends, not even your breaths mingling. It had been years since that though…..Seungcheol felt a bead of sweat trickle down his back. He had no idea how he was to spend tonight in this room. Or the next few ones.
Neither did you.
As all three of you stood before the door and the bellboy fumbled with the keys, you glanced at Seungcheol. He looked unbothered as one could be. Perhaps you were overthinking this whole thing. It was a matter of four nights, surely the two of you could at least try to be courteous right?
“What in the...?”
Seungcheol’s voice rang in the empty corridor and you leaned to see what had him so shocked. Your own jaw dropped in a strange mixture of surprise, confusion, and relief.
Room 68 was no average hotel room. It was as big as the entire lobby, 7 heavily pillowed and blanketed single beds aligned from one end to the other almost military barrack style, only small bedside tables putting space between them.
“Room 68 is uh our bachelorette party suite.” The bellboy clarified. “For, you know, those big groups of girls who are hell bent on partying all night together?” He looked away like he was recalling a horrifying memory. “Since it’s holiday season, the lodge is booked out, this was the only room we had left. Is... is it not good?”
Seungcheol looked at you and for the first time in nearly 25 years, the two of you could finally agree on something.
“No.” You stepped in. “It’s perfect.”
It had been years since you had seen Seungcheol half-naked.
Well, you frequently saw him during swim practice in those tight speedo shorts of his, ass all plump and taut but you were not talking about that. You were referring to the sight before you right now, him with a towel wrapped loosely around his waist, his wet hair falling into his eyes as he searched for something in his bag frantically – most likely his aftershave. You knew he must have cleaned up given the conference was starting tomorrow and also that his cheeks were burning because you couldn’t smell the subtle cinnamon spice aftershave that usually followed in his routine.
Seungcheol strangely felt a pair of eyes on him as he rummaged through his things and suddenly remembered he was not alone in the room. He quickly turned, looking for you, finding you curled up in your bed, writing in what he guessed was your journal, unbothered by his presence. You were wearing that cute nightgown with little tomatoes drawn all over it which Seungcheol found funny given how much you hated tomatoes with all your heart and soul. Realising he had been looking for too long, Seungcheol gulped, quickly grabbing the aftershave he finally found and rushed back into the bathroom.
You flinched as you heard the door of the bathroom slam shut, looking up from your journal. Shaking your head exasperated, you returned to your writing. Seungcheol always handled things around him roughly like he was just not built to be gentle - slamming doors hard, breaking at least one coffee mug a month, causing rips in most of his clothes when he would gym because he was so big…. And muscular…. And built…..You bit the back of your pen thinking about how good he looked in his gym wear but if you were being honest, he looked best in a suit.
He’s going to be wearing one tomorrow.
You snapped out of your thoughts realizing you were entering dangerous waters and turned your attention back to your writing. Seungcheol made that process slightly harder as he walked out, furiously rubbing his towel against the back of his head, dressed in a black t-shirt and grey sweats.
As he sat down on his bed, he looked at you sitting six beds across, all the way in the other end of the room, right by the window. The moment the two of you entered the room, he took bed 1, the one against the wall and you took bed 7, the one against the opposite wall, putting the maximum possible distance between the two of you. He let you use the bathroom first, not because he knew you preferred using it when it is dry but because he thought this was the best time for him to call his parents and wish them goodnight….. even though it was still 7:30.
He showered after you did but even now, despite being so far from you, he could still smell your bodywash, the fragrance of lilies, the mildest kind because strong fragrances irritated your sensitive nose. Throwing his towel on the chair he kicked his legs off the floor and lied on the bed, turning to the wall, hearing the faint annoyed click of a tongue. Seungcheol knew exactly what triggered it - you hated it when he tossed damp towels like that. But honestly, he couldn't care less right now, not when there were more important things to deal with tomorrow, not when he was so tired already.
You shut your journal, irritated by his behaviour remembering exactly why being in the same vicinity as this man infuriated you. Flipping the lights off and pulling the covers over your shivering body, you realigned your thoughts towards your goal - Tomorrow’s conference was crucial. You had to look your best and do your best so clocking in 8 hours of sleep was the priority, Choi Seungcheol's character development be damned.
But as you lied down turning towards the window, lightning flashed across the sky, a loud thunder following. You turned to see Seungcheol and his back was facing you, the outline of his figure moving up and down rhythmically like he was already in a deep sleep. Slightly relieved yet still unconvinced, you turned towards him before the sleep and tiredness took you away.
Seungcheol simply stared at the wall all night.
Seungcheol most definitely did not sleep all night.
You could tell by the fact that one, he was up without you waking him and two, he was not there in the room right now. That meant he was out for a run which in turn meant his face must have been all swollen which definitely meant he didn’t get enough sleep. You did notice though that his bedding had shifted from bed 1 to bed 2 and guessed it was because of the coldness of the wall - Seungcheol had the habit of tossing and turning at night and there was nothing he hated more than his bare skin accidentally brushing the cold walls. Considering you were still five beds away from him, you ignored it as you went to wash up and prepare for the day.
When he saw the time on his watch as he finished his last lap, Seungcheol realised he was way behind schedule and that you probably were already at breakfast, sitting with a dozen snide remarks, waiting for him. True enough, as he quickly showered, dressed, and headed down to the buffet, you were there already, going through the proposal, the plate beside you nearly empty. Quickly grabbing a piece of toast and stuffing it in his mouth he walked over, putting on his suit jacket in a hurry. As you saw him approach, you shut your laptop, looking at him top to down in an ensemble that fit him all too well. Seungcheol’s eyes wandered over the pretty way you did your hair, and the plunging neckline of your blouse, a sliver of your pink bra peeking from underneath the fabric-
Both of you cleared your throats and looked away.
“We should leave, the cab should be here in-” He glanced at his watch. “-should have been here ten minutes ago, fuck.”
“It’ll be here in ten.” You pushed a cup of coffee towards him, looking at him pointedly to take a seat. Seungcheol glanced at it then back at you.
“You changed the time on my watch.” He huffed annoyed. “Again.”
“Glad to know you are still capable of basic comprehension.”
“You vile woman.” Seungcheol gritted between his teeth, sitting down. “I showered so fast I thought I was going to pass out.”
“But you didn’t.” You shrugged. “And learn to be grateful Seungcheol, you’re only ever on time when I meddle, so say thanks to me.”
“I’d rather die before I thank you.” He took a sip of the coffee before the extreme bitterness hit his tongue, making him spit it out right back into the cup. “Are you trying to kill me?”
“You did say you’d rather die.”
“Fuck you.”
“I know ten minutes is more than enough for you but personally, I prefer longer.”
Every single time. Every single time you flashed him that sweet, mocking smile and every single time it pushed his buttons like no other. One day he swore to put you in your place but right now he was too low on energy for that.
Well aware that you loved strawberries more than anything, he grabbed the last one on your plate and walked off to the taxi stand, ignoring the way you whined behind him.
“Oh, real mature of you Choi Seungcheol!”
You knew in your stress about perfecting the proposal early in the morning you had forgotten something important and the moment you stepped into the room that night, you knew exactly what that was.
To close the windows.
Thanks to the pouring rain, the water had drenched your entire bed, not to forget, your bag full of your clothes which was conveniently placed right on the mattress, soaking nearly every piece of clothing you owned. Thank God the laundry in the lodge said they would handle it for you so you still had an outfit for tomorrow’s conference but there were still two major concerns - one, what to wear tonight and two, where to sleep tonight.
You solved the first problem (almost) by grabbing your umbrella and heading to the nearest clothing store as instructed by the receptionist only to find out it sold barely any ‘cloth’ at all. It was an adult shop, filled majorly with lingerie of all kinds which were aiming to cover as little as possible. Groaning inwardly, knowing you didn’t have a phone on you to go any further in this weather, you grabbed the most decent nightgown you could find and rushed back.
A hot shower, a change of clothes and a quick meal later you decided to deal with your second problem, moving your things from bed 7 to 6, not too displeased considering there were still three beds between the two of you. You glanced at Seungcheol’s empty bed and then at the time - it was well past 10. Sighing, you settled under the covers pulling out your journal to write but got lost in your thoughts instead.
You were pretty proud of what you presented today - people praised you, congratulated you for a well drafted proposal and even went so far as to offer you jobs in their company. Yet you were not satisfied. Somehow, the one thing constantly running in your mind was the swarm of women who had flocked around Seungcheol the moment the conference was done, ‘mindlessly’ touching his arms, ‘casually’ brushing their chests against his, ‘genuinely’ laughing too hard at whatever bullshit came out of his mouth.
This was not new to you, Choi Seungcheol being the centre of attention wherever he went. He enjoyed it, basked in it, and chose to make a show of it whenever he got a chance. It was all so fake and superficial; you could not bear to stand it. That’s why even though everyone decided to go out for dinner and drinks tonight, yes, all twenty-seven of them, you politely said goodbye citing a headache and took a cab back. You were not interested in casual conversation and definitely not interested in seeing Seungcheol’s pathetic flirting.
Just as you begin to relish his absence and the beautiful silence that came with it, a loud knocking on the door and his voice screaming your name ended your perfect night. Grumbling, you opened the door to a fully drenched Seungcheol looking absolutely frazzled.
“What the hell-”
He stopped when his eyes fell on you dressed in a white floor length satin gown, the material seductively clinging to the curves of your body, your leg slightly visible between the slit. You crossed your arms to cover yourself up, feeling conscious under his gaze as he gulped audibly.
“What the hell were you thinking?” He met your eyes, a slight worry flashing behind the anger. “You just disappeared without letting me know-”
“I told you I was leaving.” You walked into the room rolling your eyes. “Maybe if you could see something beyond all that pathetic fangirling you’d have heard.”
“Fangirling?” He looked genuinely confused, following you in as he stripped off his jacket. You tried your best to not stare at the way his pecs were so perfectly outlined under the wet shirt sticking to his body but Seungcheol caught you peering, his features lighting up with amusement.
“Would you look at that?” He smirked. “Someone is jealous.”
“Please.” You scoffed. “I wouldn’t be jealous even if we were the last people on Earth.”
“Obviously, if we were the last people, who would you even be jealous of?”
You sighed. “You know what I mean.”
“I actually don't, sweetheart. If a little action is all you want, you can just ask for it you know?”
“Funny coming from a guy who kissed me just because another man was talking to me.”
The first tea break of the conference had led to an introduction that was surprising to you considering people did not really tend to approach you on their own. It was even more shocking that this man chose to speak to you in the lunch break as well, completely unprompted. He was sweet, not egging you too much with conversation, simply limiting it to work and the conference and then Choi Seungcheol appeared out of nowhere, snaking an arm around your waist, uninvited. Before you could glare at him and send him away, he planted a soft kiss on your cheek, excused himself and led you away from there, only to abandon you the very next second without an explanation.
“You call that a kiss?” Seungcheol scoffed. “You were so swept off your feet, you were this close to spilling details on our quotation for the project. That was actually me shutting you up.”
“Oh yeah?” You raised an eyebrow. “If you really wanted to shut me up, then you should have kissed me on the mouth.”
Seungcheol stared at you wordlessly.
As you began to walk away, he pulled you by the elbow, putting you against the wall, trapping you between his hands on either side.
“Is that how?” He leaned closer, the scent of his cologne taking over your senses. “Because there is nothing I’d love to do more than shut you up.” He cocked his head with a small smile. “And maybe also show you what a kiss really is.”
You tried not to gulp the phantom lump in your throat, cheeks suddenly hot under his gaze. Somehow, as though it had a mind of its own, your hand traced his exposed collar bone, trailing down his chest slowly, eyes following. Seungcheol held his breath under your touch. You stopped your tracks at his hard pecs, right above his heart beating just as fast as yours and looked up at him.
And then twisted his nipple.
Shrieking in pain, Seungcheol stumbled back, clutching his chest.
“What the hell mate?”
You walked towards your bed, grabbing your matching satin night robe and slipping it on. “It's ridiculous that you even think you of all people could show me a real kiss.”
“You forget sweetheart, I was your first one.”
You turned to Seungcheol as he brought up a memory you had actually done a great job forgetting. It was during your senior year - your parents had forced you to accompany Seungcheol to a house party so you could “get more involved in the social scene” instead of holing yourself up in your room all the time. It was a classic game of truth or dare and the worst dare of your life - to kiss Seungcheol for a minute.
Now the last thing you wanted to hear was him teasing you every day about how you were too scared to kiss him so you held him by the collar and pulled yourself into his lap straddling him, your mouth meeting his in a frenzy. If you were being honest, something about that kiss served as your sexual awakening - maybe it was the way he moaned into your mouth, or his hands gripped your ass, or hands entangled in his soft hair or your chest pressed up against his. Whatever it was, there was a video of it that your classmates took circulating somewhere out there, timed around five and a half minutes as opposed to the one minute it was supposed to be.
“Don’t take too much pride in yourself Cheol.” You sat on the bed, leaning back on your hands planted in the mattress. “Only I know how many other guys I had to kiss after that to know what kissing truly is.”
Seungcheol felt his jaw tighten.
Something in you had changed in junior year. Yes, you were still the same antisocial, inhospitable, unapproachable person you always were but somehow every other day, he found you in a new location with a new guy's tongue shoved down your throat. They were not boyfriends, Seungcheol knew that much, and it was the fact that they weren't that made his blood boil with anger.
“You shouldn’t take pride in yourself either sweetheart.” He looked at you with a strange mixture of anger and pity. “There's nothing to feel accomplished about not forming a single real bond in your life.”
The moment the words left his mouth Seungcheol regretted it, knowing he had hit a soft spot. It was too late now; the damage was done - pain was flashing in your eyes.
You looked at the insensitive man before you and laughed at him sadly, mirroring his hurtful words.
“No real bond? I’m afraid you filled that void Seungcheol. Hate forms really strong bonds too.”
And with that you turned away from him, tucking yourself under the sheets, turning off the lights on your side of the room. Grabbing his towel and a change of clothes, Seungcheol locked himself up in the bathroom, your words piercing his heart like no other. Over the years yes, the two of you argued and fought and annoyed each other and couldn’t stand one another but hate? He didn’t ever think that’s what you felt for him. Perhaps he deserved it - he had after all crossed a line with that comment.
He knew you had always struggled around people. He knew that even though you detested taking his help for anything, in every social setting, you would always choose to hide behind him. It wasn’t that you didn’t want to interact, you just couldn’t. You were a sick child since birth, constantly brought down by various illnesses that often confined you to your room - you didn’t go out to play with the other children, you didn’t join the kids on their trips to the ice cream shop, you didn’t go late night camping with your classmates, you didn’t do a lot of what kids your age did.
And when you were old enough, when you were healthy enough to step out into the world, you didn’t know how to anymore. Hence you continued to stay in your own shell, closing yourself off from everyone, wary of any and all interactions. Seungcheol knew all this, that’s why when he couldn't lay his eyes on you in the crowd of the conference, the panic he felt was like no other. He never thought he would ever feel his heart stop but Seungcheol felt it twice today - once when he lost you and the other when you said that. I’m afraid you filled that void Seungcheol. Hate forms really strong bonds too.
You stared out of the window, mildly annoyed by all the light falling in your face, Seungcheol’s words ringing in your ears. It might have sounded harsh but he was right. You never formed real bonds with anyone, you could never bring yourself to. Having spent years all by yourself, you didn’t know what it was like to let another person into a space that was entirely yours. That’s why, though you engaged in all sorts of flings and hookups, you never let it go beyond that - you never let yourself lose your heart to someone, walking away from them before they could walk away from you.
In that sense, Seungcheol was indeed the realest bond you had - just a constantly present, mildly irritating, oddly comforting white noise in your life. It was easy with him - you never had to think in his presence, you never had to wonder whether anything would drive him away, never had to worry about keeping him by your side unconditionally - he was always there. Somehow what you felt for Seungcheol was liberating in a way you hadn’t even realized. Hate could hardly define that; you were unnecessarily harsh earlier.
Seungcheol stepped out of the bathroom, eyes falling on your unmoving figure which he just realized was on bed 6 instead of 7. Noticing the damp sheets and piecing it together, he didn’t think too much of it as he switched off the lights and crawled into his bed.
Hearing the sounds of him shuffling, you turned towards him.
“Are you not going for the dinner?”
“It’s too late now. I would have eaten there if I didn’t have to run back here to check up on you.”
“You could have just called me.”
“I did.” He turned to you, looking at just your silhouette in the darkness. “A few hundred times.”
You checked your phone immediately and it wasn’t a hundred times but there were some fifty odd calls from him and two dozen messages.
“I put my phone on silent during the conference and forgot to take it off.” You mumbled, just a little guilty that he was missing out on a gathering because of you. “Did you at least eat?”
“I’m not hungry, thanks to all the Americanos you kept feeding me all day.”
“If not for that, you would have been snoring in the conference barely an hour after it began.” You turned to lie on your back, facing the ceiling. “And I wouldn’t have had to do that if you’d just obediently drank that double shot espresso in the morning.”
Seungcheol remembered you sliding the coffee cup to him and smiled to himself in the dark.
“Then maybe you should also listen to me and stop munching on those strawberries every chance you get, especially when you know they flare your allergies.”
You remembered Seungcheol gobbling up the last berry and smiled to yourself in the dark.
“Goodnight, you obnoxious prick.”
“Goodnight, you insufferable fiend."
When you woke up in the morning, two things had changed - one, Seungcheol had moved from bed 2 to bed 3 in the middle of the night and two, his shirt was gone, discarded somewhere in the mess on the floor. He was lying sprawled on his bare stomach, his back covered in a thin sheet of sweat, his tattoo shining as the light hit it. Ignoring the sight before you with much difficulty, you shook him awake.
“Get up Cheol, we’re going to be late.”
He groaned, rolling over, eyes slowly blinking open, falling on you first thing in the morning. Even though you were dressed in the sultriest thing he had ever seen on you, Seungcheol controlled himself and tore his eyes away.
“The radiator is right across the other bed; I was literally burning all night.” He mumbled, stretching awake, justifying his move.
You turned towards it noticing how it was in fact between bed two and three, closer to three than two to be honest. Considering Seungcheol was still drenched in sweat, his move in the middle of the night was actually quite pointless, but you chose not to say anything about it. Quickly washing up, the two of you rushed for breakfast, skimming over the presentation notes one last time. Today, neither of you noticed but Seungcheol drank the coffee and you didn’t eat the strawberries.
Day two went by in a flash much like day one. Only this time, you didn’t talk to the gentleman from yesterday, choosing to sit quietly by Seungcheol in the break and he didn’t leave your side either, regardless of all the ladies calling him to join them. In the evening, as the team headed to the city’s best karaoke bar, inviting you and Seungcheol again, Seungcheol brushed them off claiming the two of you had a little more work to do on the proposal. To his surprise, you shot him down, agreeing to join everyone, looking at him with a small smile.
“Don’t be such a killjoy darling.”
Seungcheol knew you were compensating for last night so he followed, well aware that you would most likely want to leave the moment the singing started. Well, he was almost right - you actually wanted to leave the moment you stepped foot into the room, turning to him with pleading eyes. Seungcheol turned you by your shoulder, laughing as he led you in.
“Don’t be such a killjoy sweetheart.”
You sat patiently as the beers poured in and people around you fought for the photobooth props. Seungcheol was sitting right beside you, his thigh a comforting weight against yours, laughing with everyone. As the night progressed, you had downed a beer or two, a slight buzz taking over, not noticing the way Seungcheol had his arm around you now or that you were warmly cuddled against his torso. Soon, one by one, everyone settled on the couches, tired from all the screaming, resorting to chatter instead and deciding on an old-fashioned game of truth or dare. Seungcheol smirked at you and you turned his face away with a soft push.
“So Seungcheol,” The man beside him spoke. “Truth or dare?”
“Neither actually. We should leave now.” He stood, pulling you up, stumbling slightly. “I’ve had too much to drink and it's late, Y/n needs to sleep.”
“Didn’t realize wacky wallflower here also had the bedtime of a toddler.” One of Seungcheol’s many fangirls piqued, jealousy stark on her face. “We can book her a cab, why don’t you stay a little longer, Cheolie?”
You raised an eyebrow, amused at the nickname, and at her jealousy but Seungcheol did not find anything about her words even remotely funny.
“No thanks, I go where she goes.”
“I thought you guys weren’t dating? Then why-”
“That doesn’t change what I said.” His voice dropped an octave. “I go where she goes.”
“Cheol.” You placed a hand on his chest, sensing his anger rising. “It’s fine, let’s stay for a few rounds, yeah?”
Seungcheol looked at you frowning as you sat down, pulling him with you. The girl you already disliked but quite vehemently hate now, spun the bottle with a giggle.
“We don’t have to stay.” Seungcheol whispered as the guy beside you excitedly asked the one across him a question. “You stayed long enough, you need sleep-”
“I’m fine.”
“I’m not.” He spoke between gritted teeth. “Just looking at that foul woman makes me mad. I already said I wasn’t interested in her, she had no reason to be a bitch.”
“Well then don’t you want to put the bitch in her place Cheol?”
You looked at him with big doe eyes which terrified Seungcheol even more. What on Earth were you up to?
“Y/n, you get to ask Yuri!”
You looked at the bottle to see it pointing between you and your little conquest of the night. Hook.
“Truth or dare?” Line.
“Dare.” And Sinker.
“Okay Yuri, then I dare you to not take your eyes off.”
You pulled Seungcheol by the collar, smashing your lips on his, swallowing his audible moan. His hands immediately found your waist, pulling you closer, up against his body, teeth roughly tugging your lower lip. Hand sliding up his neck and across his jaw, you entangled your fingers in his hair, drawing him even closer denying even air the right to come between the two of you. Yes, it was all a show for Yuri or whatever her name was, but at a point, she stomped her foot and got up, running out of the room. Perhaps the two of you should have stopped then or at least when you were running out of breath. But you only broke apart when someone dropped a beer bottle, smashing the glass loudly on the floor. Seungcheol and you looked at it, faces flushed, lips swollen. A low whistle echoed in the room.
“We-” Seungcheol cleared his throat, trying to get his voice back. “We should get going.”
“Y-yeah.” You agreed, getting up and grabbing your things as Seungcheol smoothened his hair with his hand, muttering a small goodbye to everyone. As the two of you stepped out of the room, you found Yuri crying at the entrance, her friend trying her best to console her. Not sparing her another glance, you walked away, Seungcheol following you close behind. As the cold air hit you when you reached the taxi stand, you felt a painful sting on your lower lip, making you hiss. Hand cupping your face, Seungcheol wiped the trickle of blood with his thumb.
“Guess you desperately did need a real kiss huh?”
“Shut up.” You smacked his hand away. “I had to help the poor girl get over her pathetic taste in men.”
“By getting a taste of me?” Seungcheol smirked as you rolled your eyes. Before you could say anything, his stomach let out a loud growl making you laugh and look around, spotting a burger joint.
“Let’s get you a taste of that big boy.”
“Sometimes I wonder-” You stared out of the window at the large clouds rolling in. “-considering our parents are best friends and we are not, do you think our children would be good friends or enemies?”
“Wow, children.” Seungcheol munched on his burger furiously. “I never thought that far.”
“Then think about it now.”
“I don’t know.” He hummed. He hated thinking when he was tipsy. “Siblings tend to have a love-hate relationship.”
“I was talking about our children Seungcheol.”
“So was I.”
“No, I mean, my own children and your own children.”
“Yeah, same thing.”
You looked at him exasperatedly.
“Let’s be honest here Y/n. Who else out there can put up with us for long enough to start a family?”
“We can barely put up with each other-”
“But we have, for almost 25 years.” He slurped on his drink. “There’s a reason why you have never been in a relationship and I have never been in one that lasts. Because whatever it is we share, it’s you and I, till the end.”
“Till the end.” You muttered, reaching for his burger, taking a bite from it. Judging by your expression, Seungcheol could tell you liked his better, like you always do. That’s why he made sure to get it without the tomatoes he usually loved and settled to eat your meal instead. He was just about to ask why exactly you were so lost in thought when a loud thunder boomed across the sky sending a shiver running down Seungcheol’s spine.
Shoving the last of the burger down your throat quickly washing it down with some soda, you began gathering your things.
“We should go before the rain starts.”
Seungcheol nodded, finishing up his meal as you threw the trash in the nearby can. As the two of you left, muttering your thank yous to the waitresses, you laced your fingers with Seungcheol’s, gripping him tight as another lightning flashed across the sky. Thank God it wasn’t too hard to flag down a cab because the moment the two of you sat inside, rain began pouring like there was no tomorrow. As you glanced at the obscurity outside the window, Seungcheol stared at his hand, the one that you hadn’t left in all this time.
There were times when he used to stay over in your room, unable to sleep due to all the thundering while you dozed away oblivious to his presence. Those days, you’d turn around, reaching for his hand, holding it in your sleep. Seungcheol now wondered if that might have been a conscious effort to comfort him.
Perhaps not he thought as you began to nonchalantly hum his favourite song. He wondered if you knew he loved that piece because of how beautiful you looked when you danced to it. He wondered if you knew that the reason he was always around you was to make sure you were alright. He wondered if you knew he always carried an extra inhaler for you, that he had written a long list of your allergies in order from ‘can handle’ to ‘keep away from at all times’, that he was constantly alert about everything you ate, smelt and touched. He wondered if you knew, deep down how much he cared about you…..but sleep dragged him away before he could wonder anymore.
Sensing Seungcheol had fallen asleep, you stopped humming, turning to him, smiling at his half open mouth. Scooting closer, you slowly pulled his head to rest against your shoulder, and he groaned softly, nuzzling into it. The driver looked at the two of you through the rear-view mirror, making your cheeks go red as you looked away.
“Is your boyfriend afraid of thunderstorms?”
You nodded, ignoring the title. “Since he was a child. I don’t think he’s been sleeping too well the last few days.”
“The forecast shows it’s going to be worse today.” The driver sighed. “Look out for him.”
You nodded again. You did look out for him. In your own ways you always did - you always challenged him knowing that was what pushed him to do better. You always made sure to wake him up or at least meddle with his clocks so he was always on time. You always made sure he ate and slept enough, knowing how it threw him off whenever he was deprived of either. Even now you were humming his favourite song knowing it calmed him down. You wondered if Seungcheol knew, that deep down you really cared about him…..perhaps more than anything.
When the taxi reached the lodge, you softly shook him awake after paying, dragging his sleepy self through the lobby. The receptionist's eyes followed the two of you, stumbling away hand in hand, mouth curling into a small smile as you disappeared. You only let his hand go when you reached the room and that’s what jolted him awake.
The silence that descended the room today was different. It wasn’t because the two of you were too tired to say anything to each other, rather neither of you knew what exactly to say given there was so much to. So instead, you resorted to washing up and filling in your journal for the day while Seungcheol worked on a few changes in the proposal for the final pitch tomorrow. Just as he shut the laptop and you shut your diary, the two of you looked at each other before quickly looking away, settling in your own beds, for the night.
You were almost ready to drift off to sleep, before the driver’s words rang in your mind - the forecast shows it’s going to be worse today. Without thinking much, you moved your things from bed 6 to bed 5, muttering that the light from the streetlamps was falling in your face there. Seungcheol did not point out that you could just close the curtains instead and curled up in his own bed, glad you were closer to him now.
He looked at you across the one bed that was in between and suddenly you felt too far, like the distance was too much.
You looked at him as his eyes fluttered shut, thunder rumbling across the sky, wondering if he could hear you across all this space, humming louder than usual, lulling the two of you to sleep.
When you woke up, Seungcheol was surprisingly awake and fully dressed, trying to knot his tie unsuccessfully in front of the mirror, expression focused with a small pout. Propping yourself up on your elbow, you stared at his reflection, eyes skimming over the beautiful features of his face which you never really consciously admired - his thick hair, thicker eyebrows, plump, pillowy lips, his jawline sharp and chiselled. He was indeed handsome, in a way you really liked….a lot.
You wondered why you always looked at him like he was the bane of your existence. Was it because it was easier to bury the unresolved tension under pointless banter? Or did you wantonly show him your worst side, hoping it wouldn’t scare him away, hoping he would stay despite every flaw, every shortcoming. What did it mean if in 25 years, he didn’t leave even once?
Seungcheol groaned, annoyed at his futile attempts, eyes finally meeting yours in the mirror. You slid off your bed, walking up to him as he turned to you. Yawning, you took his tie in your hands, tying it for him. Seungcheol’s eyes drifted over the features of your face as he held his breath.
He could get used to this, the sight of waking up to a sleepy you, your hair all over the place, your eyes slightly droopy, nose red. God you were so beautiful - he knew that, but why didn’t he ever think about it? Why did he choose to fight every remote thought about you with irritating banter? Was he scared that the tension would remain unresolved? And what did it mean if you were still here, right by his side, helping him out in everything big and small, always making sure he was going the right way and doing the right thing, every single day for the last 25 years?
You pushed the knot up to his neck, smoothening the material, patting his chest with a proud smile. Seungcheol gulped as you walked away to wash up, trying to get his breath under control.
When the two of you came down for breakfast, you pointedly avoided the receptionist's gaze. There was no time to deal with more thoughts.
The rest of the day went like that, thoughtlessly. It was a little awkward at the conference considering the little show you two put up last night, so the moment it ended for good in the evening, you bid everyone goodbye, citing you had an early flight and had to leave soon. It was true though, you did have to travel in the wee hours of the morning, but leaving from the conference so soon also meant having to spend longer with Seungcheol, all alone. He agreed with you though, stating his social battery was at an all-time low and that he just wanted to go back.
Today the two of you were somehow sitting on two ends of the car backseat, bodies pressing against the door, in complete contrast to last night. It was a silent ride, a silent walk to the room and a silent session of packing up. Suddenly there were very conscious efforts to not brush hands, or accidentally walk into each other or catch the other person randomly staring, lost in thought. It was only when you were finally done that you asked Seungcheol if he wanted to order dinner. He agreed, leading to a very small and very efficient discussion about what dishes to eat and then silence descended upon the room again. While waiting for the food to arrive, Seungcheol muttered that he was going for a quick run, leaving you alone with the thoughts you could no longer stop from plaguing your mind.
Something had changed over the last 3 days. It wasn’t you or Seungcheol - he was still throwing his damp towels on dry clothes and you were still meddling with his clocks. No, the two of you hadn’t changed. Neither did the arguing, neither did the banter, neither did the subtle flirting, neither did the silent support. No…. nothing had changed. It was all the same. It was all the exact same except now, you were finally willing to acknowledge something you hadn’t even admitted to yourself since the age of five, that-
“I’m in love with him.” You whispered, smiling to yourself.
Seungcheol on the other hand thought running around the lodge would mean those thoughts wouldn’t run in his mind anymore. He was wrong - even though you were not there, like always you were on his mind, in his every thought, in his every breath. Seungcheol didn’t know of a life without you. He also knew that you would be there with him for the rest of his life but for the first time in 25 years, he finally found himself owning up to it - that he truly wanted you be a part of his future, that he could not bear to think of one without you in it, that-
“I’m in love with her.” He whispered, smiling to himself.
By the time Seungcheol had returned, dinner had arrived. Between each bite you searched for the right words to say, noticing that Seungcheol was trying the same. Somehow, neither of you could bring yourself to say anything.
You couldn’t peacefully finish up your journal and Seungcheol couldn’t take a relaxing shower, both muttering under your breaths, practicing long speeches, determined to confess everything before sleeping tonight.
But when all was done for the night, both of you laid down on your respective beds, staring at the ceiling, unable to talk, unable to sleep.
Seungcheol turned his head as you did towards him, making his heart clench a little.
Sighing, he grabbed his pillow and put it on bed 4, lying down, facing you.
You looked at him blinking slowly.
Seungcheol held his breath.
Taking a deep breath, you grabbed your duvet and joined him on the fourth bed, throwing it over the two of you, lying down, facing him.
Seungcheol slid his hand over your waist, pulling you closer.
You gripped the material of his shirt, snuggling into the warmth of his neck.
Nothing was said that night.
Nothing had to be said as the two of you drifted off to sleep.
It was the harsh morning sun and the annoying chirping of the birds that woke you up.
You stared out of the window surprised at the bright light given the last few days were as gloomy as it could be. Seungcheol’s soft breaths tickled your shoulder as his arms held you tight, your back against his chest. Smiling you wiggled in his grip turning towards him, taking in how much more stunning he looked in the morning light-
Morning?
“Cheol.”
He hummed softly.
“Cheol!”
“What?”
“It’s bright outside.”
“That’s how mornings are Y/n.”
“Oh thank you for enlightening me.” You rolled your eyes. “Might I return the favour by reminding you that we had a flight at 5am?”
Seungcheol’s eyes flew open.
He quickly grabbed his phone from the nightstand, 11am flashing on the screen.
“Fuck.” He muttered, running his hand through his hair. “Fuck fuck fuck, I can’t believe we missed the flight!”
You took the phone from him and scrolled through the app. “The next flight out is tomorrow morning, same time, 5am.”
“But the company hasn’t paid for the room tonight, where will we stay?” Seungcheol groaned. “How could you not wake me up?”
You frowned at him. “And why is it my job to?”
“Because, you don’t like it when I put alarms on my phone.”
“Uh no, I don’t like it when you continue to sleep through the dozen alarms you put on your phone.”
“Whatever your reasons are, I think its been established that you are the one who's supposed to wake us both up.”
“Yeah well thanks to you I forgot to set an alarm.”
“Thanks to me?” He looked at you bewildered. “What did I do?”
“Who asked you to..” You pointed at everything around with the wave of a hand, the two of you only just registering the situation you were in.
“You were the one who came to my bed.” Seungcheol shrugged. “This is on you because you were desperate.”
“Says the one who’s boner poking into my back woke me up.”
Seungcheol gawked at you, stuttering. “M-morning wood is a scientific phenomenon, okay? I can’t help it-”
“I could have.” You muttered, slipping out of the bed.
Seungcheol pulled you back under him, half hovering over you.
“Oh yeah?” He bit his lower lip with a small smile. “How exactly?”
You hummed, “I happen to know some good meditation techniques-”, running a finger down his abdomen, tracing a random design.
Seungcheol grabbed your hand and pinned it to the mattress by your face, leaning close.
“Think of a better way, baby.”
The nickname sent a delightful chill down your spine as you slightly squirmed under him, smiling.
“How about I get you some ice-”
“That’s not what I want right now.”
“Then what do you want right now?”
His eyes ran along the features of your face.
“I want to kiss you.” He whispered. “So bad.”
“And what are you waiting for?”
Seungcheol groaned, immediately pressing his lips onto yours, needy and ravenous, like he had been waiting eons for this. Well, so had you.
Pushing him off you and onto his back, you straddled his hips, kissing him again, rolling your tongue over his. Seungcheol moaned into your mouth, one hand wrapping around your waist, the other holding you by the nape of your neck, taking back control. When you ran your hand over his thick pecs, he pulled away with a dreamy sigh, planting a trail of kisses along your jaw, down your throat.
“Strip for me.”
Sitting up immediately, you lifted your hips a little letting Seungcheol push the material of your nightdress up your thighs and you pulled it over your head, tossing it somewhere. In the ten seconds it took you to do that, Seungcheol was a changed man. The old him wanted to take his time unravelling you slowly, pushing you to the edge but the new Seungcheol felt the animal in him come alive with a throbbing, insatiable desire. It became exponentially worse when you pulled your hair up, tying it with the hair tie on your wrist, baring your neck, perfect breasts, soft stomach….unable to reign it in anymore, Seungcheol lunged forward, hungrily sucking a tit into his mouth, making you lose your balance over him a little, grabbing his bicep half laughing.
“Huh, I really thought you were more of an ass guy.”
Seungcheol let go with a wet pop, looking up at you from between his thick lashes. Oh wasn’t that a sight.
“For you, I’m an everything guy.” His hands gripped your ass hard. “Your derriere does take the cake though.”
You laughed, “Who even uses that word?”
“I don’t know, I have no idea what is coming out of my mouth right now.” He confessed, his tongue running up the gap between your boobs, the sweet and salty taste of your skin driving him insane. “I just know what I want in it.”
“Yeah?” You sighed, threading your fingers through his hair, pulling him back with a harsh grip, before he latched onto your other tit. “I have better things to put in it.”
Seungcheol grinned like he couldn’t wait, flashing his canines, biting his lower lip.
God he was going to be the end of you.
But you’ll beat him to it.
Palms planted behind you, you slid yourself back off his thighs and sat between his legs, lifting your own up for him. Seungcheol’s eyes darkened in an instant and the moment he saw the wet spot in the middle of your pink panties, he could not hold himself back anymore. With a swift movement he was up on his knees before you, hooking his fingers in the elastic by your waist and slowly dragging your underwear along your legs. Like a man starving he crumpled it in his hand, breathing it deeply, eyes fluttering shut like he was intoxicated by your scent.
“I’m going to be borrowing this, for whenever you’re not there.”
“Pervert.” You whispered as he tucked it in the back pocket of his tracks. “But I’m never not going to be there. I’m afraid you’re stuck for life now.”
Seungcheol fisted the material at the back of his neck and pulled it over his head, flinging it somewhere before he put his hands between your knees and spread your legs apart, groaning at the sight before him. You were quite literally hiding his paradise between your legs.
“Trust me,” He reached for a pillow behind him, throwing it to you. “I want to be stuck here.”
The moment you tucked it under your head lying back, Seungcheol wasted no time in crawling between your legs, tossing them over his shoulder, descending on your sex. You felt your back arch off the mattress as he devoured, his tongue, mouth, lips all showing you stars in daytime.
“Fuck Cheol.” You whimpered as his tongue slipped into your hole, his moan sending a wild vibration against it. Bringing your hands to his head, your fingers gripped his hair, pushing your hips up against him “Give me more.”
Seungcheol smirked, pressing your hips down, continuing his ministrations in a way that made your toes curl. Damn he knew what he was doing. For a split second you wondered how he knew so much and an ugly jealousy began coursing through you but it was lost almost immediately, when he began to suck on your clit.
“Cheol….” You moaned, the sudden stimulation too intense for you, a tightness growing deep inside. “F-fuck that’s good.”
Seungcheol knew he was good. Not because he was experienced, not exactly - more because he was desperate to taste every inch of you. If he thought the taste of your arousal was heavenly, the moment your legs trembled and your breaths got harsher and you came against his mouth, Seungcheol knew he’d cast aside the heavens for it. This wasn’t enough.
This was probably the fastest orgasm you ever had, waves of the buzz washing over as your jaw fell slack. You rode it out against his mouth, tense shivers running down your body as his nose grazed your clit before falling limp into the softness of the bed, chest heaving.
Seungcheol was so noisily devoted to making you fall apart on his tongue, he wasn't sure if you didn't moan his name or if he was too entranced to hear it. Either way, he had to go again, keeping in mind to put his eyes on you this time. When he looked up at you, your face was flushed, lips curled into a blissful smile and Seungcheol thought he fell more in love with you, if that was even possible.
“We're gonna have to talk about why you're so good at that.” You half laughed, trying to sit up. Seungcheol pushed you back down, throwing another pillow at you, humming.
“How good was I exactly?”
“Nice try big boy,” You stacked the pillow over the previous one, leaning back against it. “I'm not going to feed your ego.”
“I'll feed myself then.” He smirked before licking a long strip between your folds making you tremble with over stimulation.
“Cheol not yet-”
“If I don't hear you I'm not going to stop.”
And he descended upon you like a mad man again, making you gasp in surprise. You did not think he'd go through with it.
“Cheol I really can't-”
but Seungcheol did not stop.
When he didn’t listen, you reached to pull him off you but Seungcheol was quicker as he grabbed both your wrists in a flash and held them against your heaving chest, continuing to eat the life out of you.
“Seungcheol please.” You couldn’t even squirm if you tried to, held down hard by his brute strength. “I really can’t-”
He looked up, his mouth wet with his spit and your arousal as he licked his lips. Fuck you really loved this man.
“Do you actually want me to stop?”
He was taunting you but there's a slight concern laced in his voice.
You shook your head slowly.
“I thought so.” He chuckled before continuing his act of wolfing down on you.
Your second orgasm began to rush in with an unreal speed and you don't know how Seungcheol could read your body so well already but the little bitch backed out before you could cum again.
“Cheol…”
You whined, frustrated at the feeling ebbing away, desperately clenching to hold on to it.
“I said I wanted to hear you.”
You glared at him, not used to him having the upper hand. He knew he's got you under control when he finally loosened his bruising grip on your thigh to sit up and you opened your mouth on your own accord to let him slip his fingers into them.
“What a pretty little girl.” He sighed as you sucked on his digits. “My pretty girl.”
“Yes yours.” You moaned, as he pulled them out of your mouth and pushed them into his, wetting them more as you practically panted below him.
“I'll do what you want, just put them in me Cheol.”
“You're quite demanding baby.” He leaned over you looking amused. “I hope you deliver as well as you talk.”
“I'll suck the life out of your dick after this I swear, just let me cum again.”
Enticed by the idea, Seungcheol captured your mouth in another one of his messy kisses, his fingers slowly slipping into your heat. You gasped into his mouth, surprised by how thick his fingers were. Oh his dick would probably make you pass out and god were you ready for it.
“Say my name baby.” Seungcheol pressed his forehead against yours, still holding your wrists between both your bodies with his other hand. “Tell me who's making you feel so good.”
“You.” You moaned as he pumped his fingers, slowly stretching you open, your arousal dripping down between your thighs. “Fuck Cheol, faster.”
He obeyed, picking up the pace as you babbled a string of curses, legs squeezing his hand desperate to feel more. Seungcheol sucked on your neck, enjoying the way you were crumbling apart for him. How was he ever going to be away from you after this?
“Oh god yes.” You sighed, as his fingers curled hitting the spot, eyes rolling back. Seungcheol looked at you in awe.
“I apologise if I ever told you that it was annoying when you rolled your eyes.” He continued to push you over. “That was the hottest thing I've ever seen.”
“Yes yes yes.” You chanted not hearing him, too lost in your own pleasure building. Pleased with himself, Seungcheol finally put his thumb over your clit and that was all it took for you to cum all over his fingers with yet another silent scream.
Seungcheol let your hands go and sat back on his heels, admiring his artwork. Your chest heaved erratically like you had forgotten how to breathe, squeezing your tits, hands desperate to claw something. Hair sticking to your forehead, sweat running down your neck next to the bruises he marked, you were a vision to behold.
Seungcheol sucked his fingers clean, relishing the taste of you yet again. You stared at him wide eyed, curious.
“Have you never tasted yourself?”
You shook your head.
“Oh sweetheart.”
Seungcheol pushed his tracks down just a bit, enough to pull his dick out. It's not the longest you've seen but God was it thick, a stark vein running down the length which looked painfully hard. The thought of having him fill your mouth and choking around it literally made you drool.
He pumped it a few times before hooking his hands under your thighs and pulling you towards him with unsurprising ease. You scrambled to raise yourself up on your elbows, watching as he ran it up and down your slit, gathering your release on it.
“Come taste.”
You blinked at the man holding out his dick to you like it was a treat, like he expected you to crawl to him, stunned at just how cocky he had gotten in 20 minutes. Hell no.
You shook your head, tilting it in challenge.
“Come fuck my mouth.”
If Choi Seungcheol had a fatal flaw it was how much he desired control but right now, there was nothing he desired and craved more than you.
Moving over not so gracefully he aligned himself by your mouth, knees planted on either sides of your waist, looming over you.
You immediately wrapped your lips around his tip, humming at the weight on your tongue as he pushed your hair off your face softly.
“I know baby, you taste fucking divine.”
Giving him a half nod, running your tongue over his slit before hollowing your cheeks around him. The mix of your and his arousal indeed tasted….right, like they belonged together.
You tried to take in more of him but you might have underestimated his girth and overestimated your ability. Pulling back with a pop, you licked your lips.
“You're too thick.” Mumbling you tried to push him off you, onto his back. “Let me move over-”
“Oh no no.” Seungcheol clicked his tongue, grabbing the back of you neck, forcing you to look up at him. “It can't be that bad, someone claimed they could stack fruit loops on it.”
You rolled your eyes realising he was a bit too proud of himself. “I still can. I just don't have the cereal to prove it.”
“I'll buy some on the way back and when we go home that's the first thing you're going to do.” He wiped the spit leaking around the corner of your mouth with his free hand. “And if you don't manage to prove your point, that's grounds for punishment.”
You grinned at him.
“Oh you like that.” He hummed, guiding your head back to his cock. “We'll see how much of it you can take baby.”
A lot apparently.
Seungcheol should have known. You were like him - you didn't like to be challenged. That's why the moment he thrusted himself into your mouth, you held onto the back of his thighs with both hands, pushing it in a lot more than Seungcheol had thought you were capable of. Throwing his head back with a satisfied moan, he began moving his hips ever so little, slowly fucking your face, but you had other ideas, taking him as far back as you could, your throat constricting around his dick.
“Alright that's it.” Seungcheol pulled you off him, staring at your confused face. Somehow you had no gag reflex and Seungcheol suddenly had the endurance of a teenager. “Want to actually fuck you.”
He muttered drawing back, kicking off the remaining of his clothes and sitting up, trying to hide his breathlessness.
“Aw Cheol, was I right again?” You laughed, getting up and clambering onto his lap. “Is ten minutes really enough for you?”
“You'll see.” He pulled you into a deep kiss before abruptly breaking away, leaving you confused yet again. “Or not.”
“What?”
“I just realised… I don't have a condom.”
You waited for him to tell you he was kidding but he looked serious.
“Cheol….” He looked at you apologetically. “Ugh Choi Seungcheol, why not?!”
“One, don't call me that and two, I don't know, maybe because this was a work trip and the conference dress code didn't mention dick envelopes.”
You sighed annoyed. “I just always thought you'd carry one on you, xl sized.” You shot his overconfidence down before it even grew on him. “you know, for your head.”
“Oh because I'm a dick?” He rolled his eyes at the comment you had used on him too many times already. “Well, wouldn't that make you a little slut? Since you’ve been in love with me for so many years.”
“Who said I was in love with you?”
Seungcheol looked at you with the biggest, fucking cutest eyes. “Are you not?”
You smiled, surprisingly shy despite all that transpired so far. Honestly, you didn't have to answer that question. What you felt for each other was clear as day.
Putting a finger on his mouth, you whispered. “Less talking, more fucking please.”
Seungcheol groaned. “What do you want me to do? Go buy them now?”
“No…” You hated the thought of him leaving.
“Or…. I could pull out?”
“The last thing I trust in this world is your timing.” You laughed, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Besides, don't you want to be inside me when you cum? Squeezing you tight? Milking you dry?”
“Kinky.” Seungcheol raised an eyebrow, secretly delighted. “And shoot me if I ever say no to that, but you're not on birth control are you?”
“No…” You drawled. “But I can get plan b?”
“Baby, you realize how reckless this is-”
“I know.”
“-we've barely just-”
“I'm aware.”
“-plus your health-”
“Choi Seungcheol.” You pushed him back into the bed, annoyed. “Are you gonna fuck me or not? Because if you don't then I'm gonna do it myself and all you get is to watch-”
Seungcheol, tucked his arm under his head, looking like he liked that idea a little too much.
“-while I cum taking someone else's name.”
His eyes darkened as his hand wrapped around your throat, pulling you down to his eye level, “Try me sweetheart.”
“You know how I feel about challenges.”
“And you know how I feel about sharing what’s mine.”
“Then fuck me like I’m yours.”
Seungcheol smiled, dropping a soft kiss on your mouth, much in contrast to what followed. “Remember, you asked for this.”
One arm wrapped around your waist, he flipped you over, putting you below him once again, the hunger in his eyes burning a lot more now. As he shifted to push your legs apart, hand leaving your neck, a soft whine left you and Seungcheol caught it immediately.
“You’re into that too?” Seungcheol smirked as you frowned at him, annoyed.
“Apparently. I just found out as well.”
“I wonder what else you’re into.”
“You can wonder all you want, after you put that dick into me.”
Seungcheol clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “I don’t like how you think I’d listen.”
Yet before you could talk back, he slid his cock along your folds, the tip slightly dipping into your hole, pulling out the most exquisite moan from you.
“Now that’s something I’d listen to.” He pushed himself a little further, your hands immediately coming to grip his biceps, gasping again at just how big he was. Seungcheol had been dying to listen to you sound like this and god was it so worth it.
You attempted to relax, adjusting around his girth as he eased himself in, but gave up even trying to maintain the facade of composure when he bottomed out, pressing all the way in.
“Fuck yes Cheol.”
He hissed softly, feeling your soft walls flutter around him. He had never fucked anyone raw and after this, how was he expected to just not spend his whole life buried in you?
“Please, move.” You begged, and he folded immediately, his hips slowly picking up pace as he kissed you along your neck.
“We should have done this years ago.” He groaned, wrapping your legs around his hips, pounding faster, harder. “We should have been doing this for years now.”
You nodded half listening, half submerged in your pleasure, nails running down his back. “Let’s just never get out of this bed.”
Seungcheol chuckled, absolutely agreeing with that idea, snapping his hips faster, delighted by the way you were reacting under him.
He wanted to flip you around and take you from the back, mark your ass with the red prints of his hand. He wanted you sitting on him, fucking yourself on his dick while he watched, your head thrown back in pleasure. He wanted to eat you out till you cried, fuck your throat and make you swallow, pull every moan and every whine and ever chant of his name out of you. God he wanted so much but Seungcheol wasn't capable of any of those right now - he had been hard for almost an hour now and your grip around him was like a vice.
“Seungcheol more.” You whined, despite him already railing into you like there was no tomorrow. He still listened though, sliding his hand down between your bodies and finding you clit, well aware that you would probably go unbelievably tight the moment he touched it, rendering him absolutely helpless. Sure enough, you keened, clamping down on him hard the moment he began rubbing circles, a string of curses leaving your mouth.
“Cum for me.” He whispered, hips rutting against yours harshly, holding his own release back desperately. “Cum all over me.”
And you did, the pleasure washing over you in waves, legs tightening around him before they finally went slack, exhausted. Seungcheol pulled them off him, gripping your thighs instead, shifting from an erratic rhythm to quick, deep strokes as he finally came inside you, collapsing on top.
He was careful enough not to crush you under his weight, holding himself up a little so you could regain your breath, watching your eyes flutter tiredly.
“We need to get you cleaned up.” He tucked your hair behind your ear, glancing at your mixed arousals dripping out of you. “I don’t know how long the statute of limitations for ejaculate is….”
For the first time in your life, Choi Seungcheol had managed to turn you dumb, as you nodded mindlessly, not having registered the stupidity that just came out of him.
He chuckled, rolling off you, but you dragged him back by the wrist, wrapping your arms around him.
“Hold me.”
And as though the universe hated you, a sharp knock on the door made you two jump apart. Seungcheol still proceeded to hold you but the knocking only repeated, louder this time. He huffed annoyed, sliding off the bed, grabbing his shirt from the floor and threw it on. Opening the door just a little, half hiding behind it, lower half specifically, he peaked out but his plan was foiled when the receptionist pushed the door fully open and came barging in, throwing her hands around.
“Check out time was 12! You’re late-”
She froze as Seuncheol quickly covered himself with a towel from nearby and you scrambled in a hurry, hiding under the sheets, squirming in embarrassment.
The old woman slowly, still shocked to the core, muttered an apology and walked out of the room as Seungcheol smacked his head against the wall, regretting not wearing his pants.
“You…” She cleared her throat from the other side of the door. “You have till 2. Get it together and get out of my lodge.” She then walked away, the sound of her footsteps fading, before they suddenly got louder again. “I would also like to add that I knew this was going to happen from the moment you two stepped foot in here!”
You covered your face trying not to pass out from the embarrassment as Seungcheol locked the door laughing.
"Why does she sound so happy?"
“I cannot believe she saw us." You groaned. "Who walks in like that-”
“Who cares?” Seungcheol walked over to you. “I cannot believe we still have two more hours.”
“You’re not even ready to go again.” You looked pointedly at the softened dick in his hand that he was pumping lazily. “Besides, we're going to have to book the room again, for tonight.”
“2 hours isn’t enough for you? Oh baby-”
“Our flight is at 5am tomorrow you idiot, we still need a place for the night.”
“Right.” Seungcheol recalled, “I forgot we had to go… that this had to come to an end.”
“Nothing’s ending.” You clarified, putting a rest to his worries. “Didn’t you say, you and I, till the end?”
Seungcheol nodded as you held your hand out to him. He walked over taking it, dropping a soft kiss on your knuckles.
“Say.” And you knew an unholy thought was brewing in that head of his. “We have all this time and there are seven beds here.”
“I don’t care how many there are.” You laughed, pulling him into the softness of the sheets. “I only want one to share with you.”
A/n - this was supposed to be out a few hours ago but tumblr was being a bitch to me. Im adding the tags in the comments! Reblogs with tags, comments and asks are much appreciated, thank you for reading :)
#svthub#choi seungcheol#seungcheol#choi seungcheol smut#seungcheol smut#scoups smut#seungcheol x reader#scoups × reader#seungcheol fluff#scoups fluff#seungcheol angst#scoups angst#seungcheol fic#seventeen fic#seventeen smut#seventeen#reverse trope prompt#one bed#too many beds
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anniversary event [closed]
kim mingyu x reader
prompt(s): getting aroused by the other's jealousy/obsession with them, "Could he/she/they do it like this?”, “you're sexy when you're angry”
word count: 5.1k
warnings: smut (MINORS DNI), fluff, potter!mingyu, they're married, reader discovers jealousy, oral (m.rec), penetration (unprotected!!!), kissing, breast play, clit stimulation, they're nasty as hell idk what to tell you
synopsis: It isn't your fault that you feel this way, especially as you watch her hands trace over your husband's own.
It isn't your fault that you can barely go on with your day with that cursed image replaying in your mind like a broken record.
And it certainly isn't your fault that you find yourself completely naked on your husband's lap while his clay-clad hands cannot touch you.
[a/n]: @highvern at the scene of the crime as always, we all have to thank her for her service as she betas for me and encourages my tomfoolery. enjoy this and let me know your thoughts in the rbs, comments or send me an ask!!!!!
masterlist
The grip you have on the file is proving to be detrimental to the cheap plastic covering. Not that you could blame yourself as you watch your husband through the window of his pottery studio, leaning over to help a student with her discombobulated salad bowl.
It was a beautiful morning, the beach across from the boardwalk sparingly occupied with delighted tanners and swimmers, the low buzz of waves reaching the shore sending a calming draft across the area. Envious as you were of Mingyu and his impeccable real estate choices, especially right now as your heel clad feet ache to take a dip in the waters, you couldn’t help but feel all the more irked that this was the background the image inside the studio was sitting against.
Through the large glass windows, Mingyu is pressing his foot over top of his very pretty student’s on the pedal to force the pottery wheel to spin, hands over her own as he guides her fingers to put pressure on the wet clay. A spiteful part of you pushes a thought in your mind, that your husband was attempting to fix a lost cause, especially when his student seemed quite insistent in her soft smiles and keeping her gaze on the fingers that cover her own, rather than actually fixing the abomination on the pottery wheel.
You don’t know how long you’ve been standing there by the time he’s done, straightening his back to turn his attention to the other students that make their attempts at their half done projects. Mingyu catches your figure through the window and immediately breaks into a big smile, clay covered hand coming to wave at you.
Taking it as your cue to walk into the studio, you return neither his gorgeous smile or his occupied wave as you strut through the glass doors. Your husband meets you on the other side of the open space, hands now washed clean as he leans over to place a kiss on your cheek.
“Hey, you,” he says in greeting, hands drying on a towel.
All you can think about is if that salad bowl girl can see you, and you thank goodness you wore your nice top today.
“Here.” You merely push the slightly crumpled file of documents to his chest, jaw set and lips tight.
“Oh, thanks,” he comments as he grabs the papers pushed towards him, smile dropping a little at your abrupt attitude. “Is everything alright?”
“Hm? ‘Course,” you answer, adjust the strap of your bag. “I have to get back to work. Be careful about your paperwork next time, I can’t keep making trips across town for this.”
You bite your tongue as soon as you say it, the words tumbling out before you can help it. Can’t keep making trips across town for this? Last time you checked, you were looking for passive excuses to make the trip to your husband’s studio just to see him during the day.
“Oh.” His brows are furrowed, the frown apparent on his face. “I–I didn’t think you’d be too busy today, you said you’d be done early so—I—nevermind. I’m sorry I pulled you out of work for this, I’ll be careful next time.”
There’s a pang in your heart as you hear him apologise, immediately mad at yourself for going on and ruining his mood. What were you annoyed at? That he was doing his job?
Your gaze lands behind him where most of his students are occupied with their projects, but just one whose eyes dart between you and Mingyu.
Taking a step back, you’re about to walk out before you feel him grab your wrist. “D’you wanna have dinner at the new restaurant down the pier after work? We can watch the sunset too, haven’t done that in a while.”
You want to scream yes. Of course you want to watch a beach sunset with your husband. Of course you want to eat at the restaurant you’ve been waiting eagerly for with your husband. And you aren’t entirely sure if this reaction is simply because you’ve been stressed lately, but the sticky feeling is pushing you to make your claim in some way, somehow.
Biting back another strangely snarky reply, you make an attempt to fix your stoic face and walk back to Mingyu. Leaning up, you kiss the corner of his mouth in what you hope is slightly reassuring.
“I’ll see you in a few hours.”
Kicking off your heels is the first thing you do once you make it back to your desk, taking no time to punch the power on button on your computer. You pull a file from the stack next to you, one that sits at the bottom, with a harder than necessary yank. Bad idea, because as you scramble to stop the pile from tipping over entirely, you can only think of other ways your day could get worse.
Before the worst of it can hit the floor, you find a second set of hands catching the strewing papers.
“Thanks, Han,” you say as you attempt to reorganise the documents, taking the extra ones off his hands.
“Have the laws of physics forsaken you? Or do you just like reorganising paperwork?” Hansol asks, sipping on something from the stupid horse mug Mingyu had made for him in light of his promotion.
Huffing, you only haphazardly stuff the files to the corner to be done with it, opening the file you need as your computer finally boots up. “Don’t you have manager stuff to do?”
“Being a manager means I can put off doing manager stuff,” he states. “Besides, I’m taking care of my peers, can you imagine the catastrophe that could’ve been if I didn’t swoop in to save you?”
“Papers on the floor? How catastrophic indeed,” you monotone as you click away at trying to find a particular excel sheet.
“How was Mingyu?”
Stiffening, you want to curse Hansol at reminding you of the very thing you did not want to think of right now.
“He was fine.”
“You were back earlier than usual, thought you would’ve had lunch with him.”
That was your plan, but clearly the universe had other ways for you to go about your day. Like thinking about an overly flirty student and her all too oblivious teacher.
“He…he had a workshop today,” you simply comment.
“Okay, Elsa, who shoved an ice cube up your ass?” You can hear the sneer in his voice, the judgmental stare.
Groaning loudly, you can only slam your forehead onto your desk in an all too dramatic fashion. “Can you drop it? Please?”
“Ah,” he drags. “Trouble in paradise. Understood. I will be at my desk if you want to complain about your husband like Margaret from Finance.”
Margaret from Finance. The woman who’s entire catalogue of marital issues would be solved if she and her husband simply spoke to each other once in a while. Perhaps even held hands on occasion.
You wince as you envision yourself becoming as stuck up and miserable as that, Hansol’s harmless comparison sending you into yet another spiral. It wasn’t that serious, this was all because your brain was stressed, horny and in love. The fact that your husband looked like how he did wasn’t really helping either.
With a little more aggression than you usually would’ve done with, you attempt to skim through the files as quickly as humanly possible, flicking through the useless filler pages to get to the ones that actually required your attention.
You send a passive aggressive email to Hansol entailing his job to keep things precise.
Shoving forkfuls of salad into your mouth, your mouse clicks louder than anyone else in the area, having gone back to change your cursor speed about thrice since you turned your computer on.
Your phone dings. Closing your eyes, you count to ten before turning to look at the illuminated screen beside you.
[Gyu <3]: did u have lunch?
[Gyu <3]: i wanted us to get sum together but u zoomed off : (((
[Gyu <3]: im done with my classes for the day. The students were asking ab you earlier when u came in heh
[Gyu <3]: cant wait to see u tonight i looooooveee u <333
God, he makes it hard to stay mad at him.
Snapping your head back to your monitor, you close your eyes once again as you question the war in your head and chest. Why were you mad at him? There was nothing to be mad about. Did you expect him to go about his day covered in plastic wrap and a neon ‘OFF LIMITS’ sign all day? The ring on his finger was supposed to do the job just fine.
You sigh as you force yourself to text him back something that wasn’t entirely passive aggressive. Typing and erasing, and typing again and erasing again. A smiley face to seal it into something you were not feeling, and send.
It’s late in the afternoon by the time you’re done, the sun less blaring as it pours through the office windows. You flick the last file shut, power off your computer and spring up to your feet, immediately gathering your things. Phone, ID, keys, and the last plastic file in your hands, you stalk towards Hansol’s desk and slam the papers next to his computer.
He nearly chokes on his pocky stick as you spit out your final notes in rapid fire, not caring if you were indecipherable in the slightest. Hansol’s eyebrows remain in the air by the time you’re done, spinning on your heels and walking straight towards the elevators.
“See you, Monday!” you finally hear him call out and you don’t turn to return his goodbye. Something that might have given you a strike but you could threaten him to take it off all the same.
Besides, you had somewhere to be, and the idea churning in your brain didn’t seem like it wanted to wait.
The sun is setting by the time you get to the beach boardwalk, climbing the steps to the line of establishments that overlook the significantly more occupied shore. Everything is perfect. Warm just the right amount, the sunlight forcing everything in its path into an incandescent glow.
What you would’ve given for a nice lie on one of the beach chairs to release an entire day’s worth of tense muscles. But alas, you trudge straight down the boardwalk and walk the way to Mingyu’s studio. When you’re nearly there, you see the glass door of the studio open from a distance, immediately recognising the part timer leaving for the day.
You cross paths as he walks towards you in the opposite direction, lighting up as he recognises you through your work attire.
“Oh, hi!” Chan chirps, arm raised in a half wave.
“Hi! Clocking out?” you ask as you stop to greet him.
“Uh—yeah, Mingyu let me go early.” He’s grinning.
“Good to hear. You enjoy the rest of your night, alright?”
“Yeah–uh, you too!” he stutters once again as he continues to smile wide. You think nothing of it and continue your short walk to where the studio doors were.
Coming round, you find the large glass door and walls have been blocked out with the blinds, the blaring CLOSED sign right at the entrance.
You stand there in front of the door like a fool, taking a deep breath, eyes closed as you gain your bearings. Grabbing the shiny handle, you push the unlocked glass open.
The bell at the top jingles, signalling a customer, and you watch your husband sitting at one of the turntables, clearly occupied. The studio is completely empty except for him, the whirr of the spinning table coming to a halt as he turns to tell whoever came in that they were closed for the day.
It’s revolting. He’s wearing his usual black tee, stained with months of splattered clay, his hair tousled like he’d run his hands through it before he started his project. The sun seeps in through the neglected edges of the top of the glass walls, past the blinds that cover most of them, casting him in an unbelievable light. It’s revolting, he’s done nothing and it’s making your head reel; revolting.
“We’re—oh, you’re early!” There it is, that stupid smile he can’t help but flash at every last person he sees, directed straight at you laced with nothing but love.
Reaching behind you, you push the metal lock on the door to click it shut, locking the both of you inside, and the rest of the beach and boardwalk out. Right after, you begin to kick off your heels.
“I already made the reservations for an hour from now, let me change and wash up so we can go to the beach till—”
“Sit down.”
He was halfway out of his seat as he was talking, ready to leave his half done work on the turntable to leave with you. Your words come out firm, a strange tone like you were giving him a command.
It works, and the shock has him immediately falling back into his chair. The force pushes the chair away from the turn tables, now half facing you.
Dropping your bag, you shuck your long coat off and leave it on the floor. Eyeing his hands, they’re covered in wet clay, suspended away from his body so as to not ruin his clothes more than they already are, speckled with dried clay and paint.
He recovers quickly, confused as he watches you fiddle with the buttons on your bottoms, rising out of his chair once again.
“What are you—”
“I said,'' you grunt as you finally push your bottoms down so they hit the floor. “Sit down.”
The shift in his face makes it obvious it has clicked in his head, staring at you as you walk towards him in just your blouse as the situation escalates faster than he can keep up with.
“Right now? Can you at least let me—”
Through his blabbering you’ve reached him and swung a leg over his lap, seating yourself on his clothed thighs as he moves his hands away, making sure not to get clay all over your blouse.
His hands may be occupied in a different sense, but you choose to busy yours in other ways. Taking his face in your hands, you lock your mouths in an open mouthed kiss, rendering him speechless.
Taking no time to think, nor to let him think, you push your hips down to meet his own in a deep grind, panty clad pussy making contact with the rough of his jeans right over his bulge. The feeling is so sudden, spiking throughout your system as you hear him take a sharp inhale still pressed into your mouth.
That was you. That was you getting that reaction out of him, no matter how small it was. The thought has you gripping the back of his head, fingers making home in the short strands of his hair as you let go from the kiss.
Wasting no time, you push his head back and stick your tongue out, licking a stripe from the base of his throat right up to his jaw. He shivers beneath you, and it only muddles your mind even more.
You can feel his bulge beneath you growing larger and larger by the second, pressing into your inner thigh as his breathing grows exponentially heavier in your ear. Locking eyes with him, you trail your other hand down to graze over the front of his shirt, pressing into the bumps and ridges that lie beneath.
Reaching his buckle, you hook your finger underneath the gap and pull at the metal. As you let go, it snaps back into place with a resounding cling! Keeping the eye contact, you drift even lower, your fingers find the growing tent in his jeans as you cup the bulge. Moving your hands in the way you know he likes it, you curb your speed to drag out the feeling for him.
“Fuck,” you hear him curse lowly.
It’s becoming impossible for him to keep his composure, especially to keep his hands away from your body that sits on him. He gets close, fingers brushing the white of your blouse in a moment of confusion, instant brown on the surface as his wet, clay hands ruin your shirt.
“If you really can’t keep your hands to yourself,” you say, halting your movements on his crotch. “I guess this’ll have to go too.”
Not bothering to undo all the buttons, you tug the first couple ones unfastened and pull your blouse over your head, throwing it somewhere behind his head. Quickly, you reach behind and unclasp your bra, flinging it away in the same general area. You’re now almost entirely naked while he remains clothed head to toe.
Your nipples harden as they meet the air in the studio, Mingyu’s eyes set on your mounds as he takes them in.
Before he has the opportunity to do anything, you slip off of your seat in his lap, knees slamming the floors in your haste as you kneel before him. Hands flying, you tug at the buckle of his belt, undoing it despite your hurried motions.
“You’ve been off today, are you sure everything’s alright?” Mingyu asks from, still wide eyed as he watches helplessly as you yank his jeans enough to reveal the final layer of his underwear. It doesn’t take you long to take his entire length out of there too, needing him in front of you.
“Do not ask me about my feelings when I’m trying to fuck you.”
“What on earth–shit!”
You’ve taken his now fully hard length into your hand, licking a strip from the base of his cock up to the bulbous head. The tip of your tongue teases the head ever so lightly, and Mingyu watches as his head and your tongue match in their reds. He watches the way your tongue dips into the pooling white of his precum, pushing into his slit as the tip of your tongue wiggles slightly.
The fact that he cannot touch only heightens the effects of your teasing, clayed hands balling into fists just to feel something on his fingertips.
Soon, your lips have wrapped around the head of cock as you let it rub against the beginnings of the inside of your soft mouth. Letting go, you take him in again, this time running your tongue over his slit, feeling his hips twitch beneath you as you continue to take him in and out, only to take him back in again.
In one motion, you sink your mouth lower onto his dick, feeling the head of his cock run against the roof of your mouth. Mingyu hisses audibly amidst his very loud and heavy breathing.
When you feel him hit the beginnings of your throat, you pull back, bringing your hand to curve around the base to cover what you couldn’t fit, pumping him up and down as you continue to pull his member in and out of your mouth.
He’s moaning loud, the echoes resonating off the walls as you hear your name slip from his mouth over, and over, and over again. It only encourages you as you move down deeper, his cock touching the back of your throat in more familiarity than before.
Everything is wet; the spit and precum turning into a shiny gleam on his cock and on the lower half of your face, the heat between your legs that makes you feel oh so empty. Clenching around nothing, you resist the urge to bring a hand down to relieve yourself.
“Are you ovulating or something, why are you suddenly…suddenly, fucking hell I don’t know.”
Releasing him from your mouth with a loud pop, you rear your head to look up at him, the lower half of your face covered in a wet glisten. Your hand continues to pump him as you watch his face remain contorted in pleasure.
In a daze, you don’t realise what you’re saying as you blab. “Could she do it like this?”
“What?”
“Could she do it like this?” you repeat like a mantra, needing to hear his answer. “Could she make you feel like this?”
“What are you talking about?” It’s taking Mingyu every bit of his soul to form coherent words.
In one swift motion, you’ve hoisted yourself back on your feet, nails digging into his thighs through his pants.
Hovering over his lap, you take his shaft once again, but this time you push your panties aside with your hand and bring it close to your heat, brushing the head of his cock over your wet folds, using him to feel the pleasure that builds.
“God, you’re so wet,” he blabs as he throws his head back at the feeling. “I wanna touch you, fuck I need to get this clay off, I need to touch you.”
He’s brought his mouth to latch onto your nipple, evoking a loud gasp from you as feel him circle your nub with his tongue before sucking. Letting go, he sticks his tongue out as his only weapon, flicking it repeatedly as you continue to rub his wet cock over your equally wet cunt.
Lining him up with your entrance, you sink onto his head as you let out a loud moan, feeling the tip stretch you out in the familiar way you’ve been craving all day. It’s like your brain is buffering as you recover from the bout of pleasure, barely registering that he’s continued to assault your other nipple now.
Your free hand comes to toy with your relieved tit, twisting your spit covered nipple between your fingers as his dick pushes further and further inside you.
Fully sheathed, you pull your husband’s face away from your breast as you bring his lips to your own, kissing him deep as you clench around his hard cock.
“Don’t. Do that,” he hisses against your lips, hands suddenly closing in your waist, so close before he realises he can’t. “‘M gonna fucking come, I’m so serious.”
The news is enlightening, especially as it encourages you to lift your hips ever so slightly, and curl back back down in an initial thrust. Again, and again, and again till you’re moving your hips at a swift pace, striking down on his length as you both moan into each other's mouths.
The feeling is electrifying, and the borderline pornographic noises your husband is making is only making it all the more easier to gush around his member, to move your hips faster as you feel the knot in your abdomen tighten and loosen.
“You feel amazing, so fucking good,” he grunts as he mouths the column of your throat. “My baby, my darling, my wife.”
And when the burn in your thighs becomes more than just a mental battle, your hips slowing despite the mind boggling feeling and the choked sobs that come out of you, you feel Mingyu’s hips lift from the chair he’d been trapped in, pushing into you instead.
His still dirty hands have taken hold of the top of the back legs of the chair, helping himself push off his seat to thrust into you rapidly.
“Touch yourself, baby,” he says. “Rub your clit for me.”
Who are you to deny him, one hand on one of his broad shoulders while the other flies down to the mess that’s becoming of your cunt. Rubbing two fingers over your clit, you throw your head back in a loud moan as you feel yourself beginning to close in.
Mingyu is watching the apex of your thighs; the way your fingers work against your swollen clit, the way his dick disappears inside you, a ring of sinful white foaming at the base of his cock. He twitches inside you, a clear indication that he was also close.
Your breasts are a sight to behold, and the scene before him is enough to make him bust entirely. Bouncing tits that he cannot touch, perfectly red, puffed pussy he cannot touch, the beautiful curves and dips of your waist and thigh, barely illuminated by the setting sun, that he cannot touch. He curses the wretched idea to make a last minute thing on the turntable before you arrived, curses the fact that he should be able to feel all of you.
He might lose his mind, and he does when your walls clamp down on him like a trap, your moans so loud he’s sure he’ll be hearing them in his ears for weeks.
“G–Gyu, I’m cumming,” you whimper through the pure brain fog.
Mingyu fucks you through your orgasm, finally letting himself release his own load into you when he simply can’t take it anymore, dick spasming as he shoots white hot cum into your hole. The added slick makes it easier to slip in and out faster as his orgasm holds out far longer than it usually does, both of your hips twitching like you’d been zapped as you come down from your highs.
It’s become near impossible to hold up your own weight, slumping against his large frame as you unclench every pinched muscle and joint. Forehead on his shoulder, you take pleasure in the afterglow, breathing in his scent with your nose pressed into the sliver of skin that reveals past his shirt. Sweat, the earthy odour of clay, and the calm familiarity of him.
“I don’t know what I did to have you acting like this,” he breathes into your ear. “But whatever it is, I need to do it more often.”
Sluggishly, you lift your head to look at him. His head is leaned back on the chair, face glowing as you stare into the eyes you fell in love with so long ago.
“You haven’t done anything,” you sigh. “It was…stupid.”
“That’s the worst thing you could say to me right now.”
You whine, rolling your neck. “What do you want me to tell you?”
He stares. “Who do I need to thank for creating this monster?”
It was a joke, clearly, but you couldn’t help but feel the little pool of pride swell within you anyway.
“Salad bowl girl.”
“And I’m supposed to know what that means? Do you want a salad bowl? I can make you one.”
“No. The girl in your class this morning with that god awful salad bowl,” you huff. “It looked offensive, she was too busy burning holes into you.”
“Oh no,” he whispers, eyes wide, mouth turning it the beginnings of a hysterical laugh. “My pretty little wife is jealous.”
“If you’re gonna rub it in, I'm getting off.” You try to remove yourself from his lap, slipping his now soft member out of you.
You’re stopped when you feel the two points of his elbows locking you at the waist, pushing you down. He’s grinning like a fool. “You’re sexy when you’re angry.”
“I’m not angry—”
“Your hello was my dick in your mouth.”
“So you didn’t like it?”
“I’d fire myself in the kiln before I ever say that.” He locks his elbows harder, pulling you closer. “Besides, I think this means I’ve won.”
“Won what?”
“Like you’ve never noticed Chan looking at you like…like he’s got some puppy dog crush on you. I’ve won the battle of composure.”
You guffaw, “What are you—stop it, he does not!”
He merely leans forward and kisses you, “I don’t blame him. My wife is the most gorgeous thing anyone could ever see.”
Grabbing him by the elbows, you break free of his hold and get off of his lap, attempting to gather the clothes you’ve scattered across the studio.
“Can you at least help me put my dick back inside my pants, these are my cleaner jeans!”
Snapping the elastic of your bra back on, pantied adjusted, you walk back to him. He’s looking at you with those stupid stars in his eyes and it makes it hard to focus on readjusting his jeans for him.
Leaning down, you take in your hands his still wet cock, smothered in your spit and arousal, complete with his own release. You can’t help it when you dip further to take his head into your mouth, the groan coming from above you near automatic.
“Oh, you’re evil.”
You grin as you wrap your mouth in a harsher suck, feeling him harden slowly, still quicker than you’d thought. Giving him a few more generous sucks, you run your tongue over his slit before moving back.
He’s breathing heavily, leaning close as you pull his waistband up. “You know, they say you should lay down afterwards if you want to be successful. I think we might have to go again later on a real bed to do the trick.”
“You can stay horny, I’m getting dressed for some real food.”
“I think we kinda need to be horny to do what we’re trying to do,” he lowtones, moving his face back and forth to meet your drifting eyes.
You sigh once again, “Why can’t just getting off birth control be enough?”
“Are you not having fun?”
“I’m literally buttoning your pants for you, it was fun until now.”
Mingyu raises his hands in both surrender and pointed regard, the clay now dried and cracking over his hands and forearms. “I digress.”
It annoys you that he’s right, so you lean in to give him a kiss as a distraction. It works.
“It’s alright,” he smiles into your kiss. “This is the one thing I won’t mind breaking my back for.”
The giggle escapes you before you can help it, and you feel him kiss at your cheeks, placing one last one on the tip of your nose.
“Now, if my lovely wife will let me wash my hands…?”
“Go,” you chuckle.
“We should name our baby Salad Bowl in this honour.” He’s way at the handwash station by now, water running as he scrubs off all the dried up clay.
“So sad our baby will have to grow up without a father.”
“I love you,” he yells.
“I’ll be sure to tell our child.”
“You’re insufferable,” he says, suddenly behind you as you pull on your blouse. Wet hands grasp your waist and you squeal at the feeling.
“Mingyu!”
“I love you,” he drags, spinning you around to face him.
“I thought I was insufferable.”
Your husband groans, simply pulling you into him with his own two hands to kiss you.
“I think we’re late for our reservation.”
“You’d better hurry then.” You eye his clay speckled shirt.
“Don’t miss me.” He turns around to find his cleaner shirt, all while you drift over to see the incomplete project still on his table.
A mug still clay-brown and half done, but one that looks suspiciously similar to your favourite one you broke last week.
#🎁gyuswhoreturns1!#svthub#mingyu fluff#mingyu angst#mingyu smut#mingyu fic#mingyu scenarios#mingyu imagines#mingyu x reader#mingyu#seventeen fluff#seventeen angst#seventeen smut#seventeen fic#seventeen scenarios#seventeen imagines#seventeen x reader#seventeen#svt fluff#svt angst#svt smut#svt x reader#svt#em.writes#seventeen fic recs#mingyu fic recs
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— debauched | ft. stepbro! mingyu
⋆ pairings; mingyu x fem! reader ⋆ genre; smut ⋆ w.c; 4.5k+ ⋆ warnings; stepbrother! mingyu, gyu wears glasses (yes this is a warning), debauchery, oral (f.receiving), mate press, raw sex, creampie, dubcon, fucking while parents are in the room, fingering, handjob, pussy slapping, jealousy, mingyu is kinda toxic, panty stealing, somnophilia, spitting kink, exhibitionism, doggy, choking, public indecency, mentions of food ⋆ a/n; im so sorry for this monstrosity. i was possessed and i refuse to do damage control 😌 (thanks to @miabebe for assisting my lunacy and giving me ideas lol.)
“fuck, you can't do this to me.”
“i can't do what to you?” you question your step-brother as he follows you into the bathroom. you don't mind it and grab your toothbrush and the paste.
“this,” he gestures towards you, more specifically the nightwear you're wearing. a cute cropped tank top with a matching pair of underwear. it's patterned with little flower prints and lined with lace.
“i'm not doing anything. not my fault you're a horn dog.”
you don't entertain him any more and brush your teeth. and neither does he, opting to grind himself on you. his hard-on presses on your ass and his hands wander all over you, skating over your skin with experienced expertise.
you give into his wishes and bend over a bit while going on with your night routine. his calloused hands slip under your top, and squeeze your tits. your nipples pebble under his touch, complying to his wishes just the same. he pinches the buds with urgency, just the way his hips grind on yours.
without much reaction, you continue brushing. but your body is growing hot with every second, and the need to have him inside you is insatiable. you wish your dad never married his mom for various reasons, and this is one of them.
“y'smell so good.” he slurs, sniffing your neck like a hound dog. his tongue traces your jugular, tasting your sweet perspiration. one of his hands travel down south, toying with hem of your panty—
knock, knock.
mingyu throws himself off you, startled by whomever was on the outside.
“honey, are you in there?” your dad's voice resonates through the door and you give him a gargled ‘yes.’ he wishes you a good night and walks off.
mingyu takes it as a cue to use the other door, connected to his bedroom and enters it. through the closed door, you hear dad checking upon him before he walks away again.
with a sigh, you rinse your mouth. and an examination of your panty reveals a soaked patch staining it. with annoyance and longing in the mix, you discard the cloth into the laundry hamper.
[ ... ]
the creak of the floorboards stir you awake and your eyes fall on a figure standing in front of you. startled, you turn on the lights and scramble to protect yourself.
only to be met with the sight of mingyu, holding your panty to his nose as he squeezes himself through his grey sweatpants. the outline of his cock is visible through the cloth. your mouth salivates and your eyes snap up to his. his dark eyes look down at you through his glasses, the depravity of his thoughts seen through his gaze.
mingyu doesn't say anything and hooks his hand underneath your knees and pulls you to the edge of the bed. in one swift go, your panties are gone, causing you to yelp in surprise. feeling shy with the sudden exposure, you close your legs.
he moves to your wardrobe, quickly retrieving a tie from there.
“gyu, no.” you warn but he doesn't listen. despite your protests, he ties up your hands behind your back. you sigh in defeat, “but you should stop when i tell you to.”
“i know.” his deep voice sends a frenzy in your stomach and your legs part on their own.
he licks your lips, invading them with ease. his boner prods your thighs as he makes out with you. you cant your hips, chasing some of that delicious friction. mingyu tuts in response and looks down to where you're desperately grinding against him.
he descends down, skating his lips and teeth over the skin of your neck and torso. warm breath greets your sensitive skin that's coated with arousal. he kisses the plump flesh of your thighs, ghosting his canines over them.
he slowly reaches your core and gives it a kitten lick. you whine, and buck your hips up. flame licks your skin and the lewdness of the situation makes you desperate.
when his lips meet your cunt, it's unexpected. a loud gasp tears from your lips at the force of it. he places an open mouth kiss to your heat and his hands force your legs as apart as possible.
his tongue glides over your cunt, licking up your arousal. it's nothing soft or sweet, only rough and desperate. he sucks and slurps on your whole, sending waves of pleasure through your body. he shakes his head side to side, tongue prodding at your folds.
it's impossible to contain your moans but you try your best. the cold plastic of his glasses kiss your skin whenever you try to close your legs. he eats you out like a starved dog.
your hole clenches around nothing and mingyu fills it with his tongue. he pushes his tongue in and out of you, the wet sounds of which fills the room. the sensation causes your hips to buck up into his face.
“ah!” you moan, loudly. you just don't find it in yourself to care anymore when he thumbs your clit. he pulls away, a string of spit connecting his lips to your cunt. you look down to find him staring at you over his fogged up glasses. it slid down, letting you see his eyes uncovered.
he spits on your cunt, the warm glob drips down your folds as he maintains eye contact with you. he licks up a large stripe, savoring your taste on his tongue. his tongue prods at your hole again and he fills you up. but this time, it's slower.
your gummy walls clench around his tongue, overstimulated by his thumb on your clit. your moans echo through the room again and a knot builds in your stomach. mingyu picks up his pace, returning to slurping your cunt.
the knot gets tighter and tighter, till it breaks, leaving you a babbling and trembling mess. you black out from the intensity of the orgasm and your moans cease.
mingyu licks up your climax, not wasting a drop of it. with a final kiss to your clit, he pulls away. as much as he wants to split you open on his cock now, he can't. he respects your wishes but that doesn't stop him from leaving a present for you.
he pumps his twitching cock to the sight of you. it doesn't even take a minute till he's moaning your name and spilling his seed on your thighs and stomach. he wants to finish inside you and see his load spill out of your pretty lips but he decides it for another day.
squelch.
you shift.
more wet squelches resonate from beneath the blanket you're sharing with your stepbrother. your lips shudder as you release a sharp breath.
a family movie night. it was what it was supposed to be. that is, till your parents fell asleep and mingyu sneaked his hand inside your shorts as you both sit on the couch.
two of his fingers are buried up to the hilt in your cunt, slowly drilling in and out of you. but it isn't enough and you want more, need more. your hands venture to find his cock beneath his pants. he simply spares you a glance before focusing on the movie again.
with a cautious glance to your dad and his mom, you tilt your head, pressing small kisses to his neck. his adam's apple bobs when you lick the column of his throat.
your hand finds his hardness beneath his underwear. wrapping your hand around the base, you pump him slowly. when your hand glides up to his tip, you rub your thumb over it, smearing the pre cum all over. a low hiss fills your ear and you smirk as he bucks into your hand.
you continue to kiss and bite his tan skin. his breathing turns sporadic, abdomen clenching with restraint. you're caught off-guard when he picks up his pace and curls his fingers against your sweet spot. you gasp, and clench around him.
“look at the tv.” he teethes your earlobe, hot breath ghosting over your neck. goosebumps prickle all over your skin when his canines brush against your skin.
“you both still awake?” the voice startles you and you try to remove your hand from beneath his pants but mingyu stops you. he wraps his other hand over yours, and guides in pumping his cock.
“yeah, we're gonna finish it.” he answers his mom who searches for her glasses while mingyu adjusts the blanket. when she puts it on, everything seems fine and well. she smiles at you both and wakes up your father to move him to the bedroom.
all while mingyu's jerking himself off with your hand and curling his fingers against your sweet spot. she wishes a goodnight, and you respond in unison. the moment her bedroom door locks, he pulls the blanket off.
your clothes along with his joins the blanket on the couch. he relaxes on the couch and makes you straddle him. his cock pokes your cunt, twitching with need. his hands perch on your hips as he guides you slowly down his cock.
“fuck,” he groans, seeing his cock disappear into your cunt.
you take purchase on his shoulders while preparing to ride him. broken moans fall from his lips as you start to bounce. his hands slide down to your ass, and he gropes and massages them.
in a hope to tone down his moans, he connects his lips to yours. tongue meets tongue as your moans mix together, creating a lewd symphony. your thighs slap against his and your arousal drips down his cock to his balls.
his cock splits you open deliciously. the swollen tip hits all the right spots with precision. he fits perfectly with you, like two puzzle pieces. the kiss turns sloppy and messy. your tongue glides over his and your spit mixes with his. you taste his lewd noises on your tongue, a fuel to ride him with more energy.
your pulse beats in your cunt, and you're clenching around him in no time. mingyu does his best and meets your hips with urgency. his lips wrap around your pebbled nipple, sucking with a fervor.
soon, only his hips are moving as he holds you still against him. his strong arms wrap around you, hips drilling into yours every millisecond. but his thighs tremble, giving away his approaching orgasm.
his movements turn sloppy and his moans louder. awareness seeps into your mind when you realise you both could be caught easily. somehow, it only arouses you further. you move against him desperately, feeling his cock kiss all the right places.
you grind against him, chasing friction. sensing your neediness, he slips his hand between your bodies. his thumb circles your clit and he takes your nipple into his mouth again. your nerves fire up, overwhelmed by the attention on your body.
your cunt clenches around his twitching cock. he whines your name with more urgency and you do the same. “fuck, mingyu.”
the orgasm washes over you with an intensity that makes you quiver in his hold. with you wildly clenching around him, he meets his climax as well. he doesn't pull out and warm ribbons of cum spill inside you.
“mingyu!” you gasp in shock but he shushes you with a kiss. his tongue slips past your lips, eager to suck on yours. he holds you still and empties his load inside you. your initial protest melts away as lust seeps into your skin again.
you feel so dirty but so, so good.
mingyu shuts the tv off and picks up the clothes, all while staying inside you. a surprised gasp falls from your lips when he picks you up and walks to his room. there, you fall asleep in his arms with his cock still buried deep inside you.
mingyu's vision turns green when he sees you laughing and chatting with your guy ‘friend.’ since when did you invite your guy friends to dinners at home?
he makes sure that he does not like that guy. didn't even bother learning his name. a seat draws abruptly and four pairs of eyes settle on mingyu. “dessert anyone?”
all except your dad agrees. “wait, take your sister with you. i don't want any broken dishes tonight.”
he doesn't spare you a glance and walks to the pantry. you follow him to choose whatever fits your appetite. maybe, you should've known better than to stay in a room alone with mingyu.
the moment the pantry door is shut, he's all over you.
“mingyu—stop, others are out there.” you gasp, feeling him shift his entire weight on you.
a low scoff resonates from his chest, “you didn't care about others during our parent's wedding.”
the recall of the memory sets your nerves on fire. fuck. of course, he pulled that card.
there's no use in resisting him. especially when your body is screaming at you to submit to him. his hands itch to tear off the pretty dress you're wearing, but he decided against it.
instead, he lifts up your dress and yanks down your pretty matching underwear. a condescending chuckle resonates from his throat, “you sure you just brought him over for dinner?”
his eyes turn a shade deeper when a thought strikes him.
“or, did you already fuck him?”
his tone sends a wave of arousal through your body. you felt like a prey being cornered by a predator. his gaze is animalistic as he looks down at you, his glasses slipping off his nose once again.
“no, no! we didn't-i didn'—”
you're cut off when he slots his lips on yours. that alone is enough to elicit a moan from you. “good girl,”
he backs away from you but keeps his hand under your dress, slowly hiking it up further till your glistening pussy greets his eyes. a sadistic grin stretches on his lips as he watches arousal drip from your cunt.
he collects the fluid and smears them on your cheeks and lips, earning a whine from you.
“mingyu, they'll be suspicious if we're gone for too long.”
“and?”
a sharp sting shoots through your core. it takes some seconds for you to realise that he slapped your cunt. your jaw falls slack in shock but mingyu isn't deterred. he looks at you with hooded eyes as he delivers another slap to your cunt.
you're embarrassingly wet now and it drips down your thighs. mingyu licks his fingers before slapping your core again. a few more slaps has you whining and trembling. your cunt only gets more and more wet with each slap.
“you,” slap,
“are,” slap,
“mine.” slap.
he pokes his cheek with his tongue when you don't respond. a tut from his lips brings you back from euphoria and you stare at him with wide eyes. he roughly yanks you closer, one hand on the small of your back while another squeezes your cheek together.
you whine, more needy than ever. he shushes you, brushing his thumb over your lip. “it's ok, i can forgi—”
“spit in my mouth.”
he takes a few seconds to decipher what you said, so you repeat it. with more desperation. “mingyuu, spit in my mouth. please!”
smugness fills his veins, and he's more than happy to oblige. he collects his saliva and spits it in your mouth when you push your tongue out with your eyes rolled back.
but your bliss is cut short when he places some dessert in your hand, nodding at you to go back. “and, i'm keeping this.” he pockets your panty and follows behind you.
your hand clasps the knob when he delivers a sharp slap to your ass. “fast. you wanna get caught or somethin’?”
you were more than confused when mingyu sent a text that your ‘guy friend’ was waiting at home for you. given that, it's been a week since that dinner incident and you haven't even spoken to your friend since then.
but, you're not confused anymore. not when mingyu has you on all fours, pounding your cunt as your ‘friend’ watches.
your wanton moans sync with the lewd skin slaps. his hands perch on your hips, maneuvering your body to his needs. heavy balls slap against your clit, providing you the utmost pleasure.
the fact that someone else is witnessing this debauchery doesn't bother you. in fact, it arouses you and floods your cunt with wetness. and because your parents are out of town, it gives you the freedom to be as loud as you can.
you arch your back, leaning into all of his touches. his hand ascends to your neck, fingers hooking into your hair. you yelp when he tugs on it, the sharp sting is delicious through your lust haze and you moan louder.
he releases his grip, opting for a painless grip—his fingers wrap around your nape. the other still perches on your hips as he continues to pound you into the next dimension.
much to mingyu's amusement and annoyance, that guy's pumping his cock to the scene in front of him. with a roll of his eyes, he fucks your harder, with more force in his thrusts.
his movements are fluid. anyone can tell that this isn't a first for you both, that you've fucked multiple times before. he lands a slap on your ass, groping and spreading your cheeks.
even though, he's been fucking you straight for the past twenty minutes, he doesn't feel his climax anywhere near. so he arches your back and puts you in a chokehold. his biceps tighten around your neck, veins visible and pulsing with adrenaline.
“fuck! fuck! mingyu, please—” loud, lewd moans fill his ears and he savors each syllable that falls from your lips. it pushes him to fuck you harder and harder, till you completely fall apart in his arms. till your mind melts, and all you can remember is him. only him.
you scream, the orgasm washing over you unexpectedly. you tremble in his hold, sensitive from your climax. but mingyu isn't done. he pushes you onto the mattress and you grip the duvet with the energy left in you.
mingyu abuses your hole, thrusting sharply as his orgasm creeps closer. his balls slap against your clit, aiding in your overstimulation. with another sharp thrust, he cums inside you. a loud groan rumbles from his chest, letting the voyeur in your room know that he's reached his climax.
he pulls out and with that, his load also spills out. mingyu falls on the bed next to you, heaving for breath. another moan resonates in the room, and he lifts his head to look at the guy with a raised eyebrow. ah, right.
with a grin, mingyu walks towards him. although he's smiling, it's anything but friendly.
“listen, if any of this gets out—”
their conversation falls out of your earshot when your stepbrother starts whispering into his ears. but it isn't a mystery that he's threatening him. you don't bother with it much and fall asleep, feeling more spent than ever.
a memory plays out in your dreams, one that feels much more like the latter than the former.
[THE DAY OF YOUR PARENT'S WEDDING]
you groan out of annoyance and scream into your hands. nothing seems to be working your way today.
the heater doesn't work. your dad is marrying someone else, just six months after the divorce. your cereals were soggy. and, now you can't zip your fucking bridesmaid dress.
a knock on the door refocuses your attention. through the mirror, you see mingyu standing near the door. embarrassment shoots through your veins but you feign a smile and turn to look at him. before both of you can exchange words, his mother comes up.
“hi dear! oh, you look absolutely lovely.” she smiles at you, a genuine one. but you don't feel it in you to reciprocate it. you muster up your best smile and thank her, telling her the same.
“aww, thank you. oh, right! mingyu here said that he wanted to speak with you.”
your heart drops down to your stomach. ah, how could you forget your soon-to-be step brother from your list of mishaps? he isn't exactly mean or nice. he just acts as if you don't exist. and it hurts, especially when you feel such an attraction towards him.
you see him protest back, spitting something along the lines of “i never said that,” it worsens your nerves. she snaps at him, giving him a glare and you a smile. your heart palpitates when his mother closes the door and locks it.
mingyu doesn't say anything, instead takes time to compose himself. meanwhile, you contemplate on how to zip up your dress without further embarra— “need help with the zipper?”
“huh? ye-yes.” well, shit.
he stalks towards you and you turn around, involuntarily. you move your hair out of the way for him. he places one of his hands on the exposed skin of your neck and the other zips up your dress, albeit slowly.
and you swear on god that he caresses your skin while doing so. but you sum it up to your horny brain playing tricks on you. “thank you,” you whisper, meeting his eyes through the mirror.
“you're welcome.” his deep timbre voice shoots arousal down to your core and your body raises in temperature.
he inhales sharply before muttering, “mom wants me to get along with you.”
“but i don't want to.”
it stings. more than you'd like to admit. he continues, not giving you a chance to respond. “i don't want them to marry. i suppose you don't either. and i certainly don't want to follow whatever fucking rules they say.”
his eyes are trained on you the entire time, and you maintain it. even though, your nerves are all over the place and you're trying really hard to focus on his eyes and not lips.
“we could be good friends,” he suddenly moves closer. much closer. his body presses against yours and his hands settle on your hips. his chin rests on your shoulder and he maintains eye contact through the mirror. “only, if you can obey somethings.”
that tingles your stomach and you're more than intrigued to know what he means.
“like what?”
he smirks and breaks eye contact to look at you, rather than your reflection. “like that i'd rather be your fuckbuddy than your stepbrother.”
mingyu's heart paces on its own and he prays to god that he didn't hallucinate the way you look at him sometimes. where your eyes drift and the emotion swirling behind them. his assumptions are affirmed true when you arch your back, pressing your ass against his crotch.
he tries to control his smile and maintain his image to you. which proves to be very hard when you whine so cutely, “oh, fuck me.”
the zipper he'd just done comes undone as he presses hot, open-mouthed kisses all over your nape and the exposed skin of your back. he presses his hard-on against your ass, feeling his cock sink into the plush flesh of—
“you both have better made friends!”
he pushes away from you, but not before he zips your dress. he fixes his suit, and you pat down the perspiration on your face. she unlocks the door and smiles at you both.
“look at you both! aww,” she engulfs you both in a hug, and you pray to god she doesn't feel your palpitating heart.
[...]
the elevator dings open and whoever was on the other side lets out a surprised noise and scrambles away. but you don't give a fuck neither does mingyu.
his tongue glides over yours in a hot, deep kiss, such that your faces are obscured to anyone who can stumble upon you. the heat of his body seeps into you, driving you absolutely crazy.
the elevator dings again, the automated doors opening to the floor of your room. his hands are all over your body and so are his lips. he nibbles on your ear lobe and neck, licking the patches of red he leaves behind.
you swipe the key card with much effort and finally get in. mingyu pins you to the door as soon as you get in, grinding his hard on against your stomach. he reconnects his lips with yours, humming in content.
the bed creaks with each of his thrusts. surely, there would be complaints from the neighbors but could care less about everything else. your mind can only focus on mingyu's cock drilling in and out of you.
mingyu's addicted to the image of you writhing in pleasure, underneath him. and the bulge of his cock that appears whenever he thrusts does little to soothe aching desire.
his balls slap your ass with each heavy thrust. your breaths mingle together as he splits you open on his cock. his canines ghost over your neck, and he sinks them into your skin, wanting to see how it looks. how you'd look with his mark.
you look perfect, he thinks, absolutely drunk on the idea of making you his.
it pushes him to fuck you harder. he pushes your knees on either side of your head, drilling his cock inside you deeper and deeper. your moans turn into screams with the drive of his cock. his leaking cock is buried to the hilt, hitting your sweet, spongy spot now and then.
you lose the ability to form coherent sources. only babbles and whines fall from your lips, absolutely drunk by his cock. mingyu adds to it by reaching a hand down between your bodies to rub your clit. the delicious friction has you mewling and canting your hips.
your nails rake his back as he continues to pound your cunt with all of his strength. that combined with the clit stimulation makes you sob and squirm underneath him. your legs quiver and toes curl. your breathing turns rapid and the knot in your abdomen gets tighter.
“fuck, fuck, fuck!”
he presses your knees further down, fucking you with much ardour. tears stream down your face and broken sobs tear from your throat. mingyu licks your tears, and stares at you, drinking the sight beneath him. his cock twitches when you look up at him, “shit.”
your hips lift off the bed and legs tremble more than ever. you gasp loudly when you cum. the orgasm crashes over you, making your body a quivering mess. you see stars and you feel as if you're not on earth anymore, as if you're in heaven. mingyu brought heaven down to you.
you only realise that he pulled out when you feel his weight on your body. his body quivers just the same as yours, breathing rapidly and consciousness in another dimension. he rolls off you, lying on the spot next to you.
warm cum decorates your abdomen and it feels so right but so wrong.
“thanks,” you blurt out, regretting it immediately. he chuckles, “for what?”
[NOW]
“everything.” you mumble in your sleep and mingyu glances at you with confusion. you mutter more things and it causes him to chuckle. he pinches your cheek and kisses it.
his hand caresses your back as he cuddles you. it somehow feels right despite the moral restrictions. but he doesn't care, not when you look so peaceful, curled up on his side.
it may be debauched, but it sure as hell is his heaven.
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sage & stardust
🌙 starring. Kim Mingyu x afab!Reader
🔮 preview. “I think you’re amazing, and good with your hands, and pretty, and I enjoy spending time with you too,” he counters, echoing the entirety of your sentiment. You stare blankly up at the man. It’s clear he doesn’t know what you’re getting at. You wonder how fairies court each other- do they even court each other? Do fairies have sex? Or are they just… you don’t know, blossomed out of flower buds or something?
tw/cw. Unprotected sex, Mingyu holds y/n down by the wrists, size kink, mentions of possible bondage kink, heavy petting, worship, Mingyu is a boobs guy, nipple sucking, fingering, pussy stretching, foreplay, multiple reader orgasms, oral (f receiving), praise, dirty talk, etc… I pet names: (hers) my star. (his) Gyu.
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 9.6k
🍭 aus. Fairy au, fantasy au, non idol.
☀️ mlist + an. Okay, so, I’ve written sooo many fics on this blog, and lately I’ve been wanting to try things I haven’t done before. I’ve never done a legit small man fairy dude (who does become normal/large sized later) x yn in a fic before, so bare with me, because these two are such a delightfully domestic pairing. Without further adieu, I give you: blue-collar fairy Mingyu.
Prologue
Pandora lives in a little cottage in the forest. Even though she’s young, she knows the trees and ferns, the mushrooms and flowers. Who needs mundane playthings when you have four entire acres of wilderness to keep you entertained?
Her mother is an artist, and steady hands run in the family. Pandora spends her evenings carefully painting a dollhouse model of the cottage that her father had crafted for her in his little workshop shed outside.
All in all, it’s a peaceful existence, and things are very predictable. Mother is in the studio solarium room, fingers covered in inks and colorful spots. Father is crafting something in his shed, fixing up the house as he engages in an endless war against the elements of the forest.
Pandora flutters around, checking in on her parents, and exploring the immediate grounds around the cottage. Today, she’s following a particularly beautiful butterfly as it glides amongst the trees down by the pond. She’s so enamored with the pretty wings, that she almost doesn’t notice the fairy ring.
A circle of mushrooms, one she’s scouted out before, is along the bank of the murky water. Pandora has heard tales of fairies and pixies, and has been warned not to enter circles like this. She sidesteps the ring, and that’s when she notices something out of place, something that hadn’t been there yesterday.
Just outside of the little circle, is a small creature. At first glance, the glossy wings look butterfly-like, but Pandora has never seen sage green wings like these on a bug. The small child pauses, hiking up her dress and kneeling down to get a better look.
Definitely not a butterfly. Where an insect would have a thorax at the joining of wings, this creature has a tiny little man. Well, he’s bigger than a butterfly would be, but it’s clear to the young girl that she’s looking at a fairy, and as she inspects him further, she notices one of his wings is torn.
Pandora has mended butterfly wings with her father before- she knows what to do, but she’s hesitant. Should she help this small fairy, as she’s helped many bugs before him? Is he simply resting and not in immediate danger?
She looks around, noting any predators in the surrounding area. A large bird circles overhead, and Pandora decides she has to act. Reaching for a leaf, she scoops the tiny fairy's body into the greenery, carefully carrying him back toward the cottage.
As she gets there, she sees her father getting into his work truck to head to town, and Pandora knows better than to stop him. She also knows better than to go interrupt her mother, who is on a deadline for a piece and has asked not to be disturbed.
No, Pandora will have to do this rescue mission herself, and she heads into her father’s workshop to find the glue.
She does her best to be gentle, even with her pudgy fingers, as she mends the torn wing. When she’s done, Pandora finds one of the many small boxes her father has made. It’s a cedar box, with a small, iron latch.
Leaving the fairy, she goes outside, collecting a little nest of moss to put into the box.
When everything is finished, she sets the fairy into the box, carefully closing it and latching it shut. He needs some rest, and as far as the small child is concerned, he’s safer in her little box than lying in the grass where big predators might hurt him.
One:
“I’m sure it’s no surprise that your grandmother left you the cottage,” the lawyer in charge of the estate tells you as he looks over the papers on his desk. “As you are the only artist in the family, Pandora wrote that she hopes the solace will inspire, as it had inspired her, and her mother before her.”
You nod solemnly. It’s a monumental gift, one your cousins would kill you for- but alas, you’d spent the most time with your grandmother in her later days, and the solarium studio is already set up as your own. To be young, and a homeowner now- this had never been your intention in spending time with her, but perhaps it’s a happy outcome, given the dire situation of her passing.
“She also wanted me to tell you, that you can finally open the box.” The lawyer looks at you expectantly, pushing his glasses up his nose. “Do you know what she was referring to?”
“Yes,” you respond. “She’d kept this small cedar box. Her father had made it for her when she was a child. It’s on her nightstand, but she’s never opened it.”
“Well, that’s… interesting.”
“Yeah, Pandora’s Box, I know the story,” you let out a sad chuckle. “Part of me doesn’t want to open it, she always told me not to, I guess I made it this big bad thing in my head as a kid.”
“I’m sure it’s just jewelry or something of the sort,” the lawyer assures you, and you remind yourself that men of the law are never the superstitious type.
Two:
You’re a few glasses deep into your bottle of wine, and you find yourself looking at your grandmother’s small cedar box. Curiosity is getting the better of you, and liquid courage is doing wonders to calm your superstitions.
There can’t be anything dangerous in the box, or your grandma wouldn’t have left it for you… right?
Taking a breath, you approach the box. It’s sitting on your dining room table, you’d gingerly carried it from the bedroom earlier, with the intention of opening it, and now, you will.
You sit, staring at it for a few moments. Your hands shake when you reach for it, but you push away your anxiety. The iron latch is old and worn, but it clicks open after a bit of work. Taking another deep breath, you lift the cedar lid.
Nothing happens, no surge of dark spirits releasing the worst of humanity, no hurricane or pestilence-
You lean forward, looking into the box, and you’re shocked by what you find there.
Half buried in a nest of mossy greens that looked like they were only picked hours ago, is a small winged man. It’s a fairy, you realize, with glossy wings-
He stirs a little, stretching his arms above his head and yawning.
How could this be? Ignoring the moss that’s apparently been preserved for over seventy years, how is this tiny creature still alive after being shut away for a lifetime?
Part of you wants to close the box, to forget about it- but then the tiny man’s eyes open, and he stares up at you. You freeze immediately, as if paralyzed, your mind going blank in the face of the supernatural.
The fairy rubs his eyes, sitting up amongst the bed of moss. His hair is all messy, but in a way that’s kind of adorable. He gazes up at you, and then, he speaks. “Hello?”
“Hi?” It comes out a question, and you’re unsure how to proceed, so you say nothing else.
“Sorry, this is embarrassing,” he laughs, and you note the way his skin has turned pink. “Did you save me?”
“As horrible as this sounds, I uh… inherited you?”
“I don’t even know what that means,” the tiny man muses. “I remember being attacked by a large bird in my realm, my wing was damaged, I made my way to a fairy ring to come to your world and recuperate, but I must have passed out.”
You consider his words for a moment. “My grandma used to fix butterfly wings, is it possible she found you and fixed yours?”
The fairy extends one of his sage appendages, inspecting it. “It definitely looks repaired… Your grandma, you said?”
“Yes.” You nod. “I was told she’d had this box since she was a girl… have you been in here for a long time?”
“I was in hibernation, the dark and the moss- it was healing, I awoke because of the light.”
“So you have been in there for years,” you conclude, shocked. “I’m… I’m so sorry.”
“How many years is ‘years?’ You humans have a different view of time than I do.”
“Probably seventy or eighty?” you suggest.
“It didn’t feel like that long.” He cocks his head to the side, clearly thinking, then he looks up at you again. “How long have you had me?”
“I uh…” you swallow thickly at the question. “Well, I just inherited the cottage, and my grandma left the box to me in her will too… so, only two days.”
He nods, looking down, continuing to think hard about whatever it is that fairies ponder deeply on.
“How… how do you feel?”
“Well rested,” he smiles, breaking the look of deep concentration. “I’m ready to get back to tinkering.”
Tinkering… that definitely sounds like a fairy word, and you don’t question him further.
“Please don’t let me stop you from getting back to your home,” you tell him. “I’m sorry for the inconvenience of my grandmother keeping you in this box all this time.”
“It’s alright,” he yawns again, then pushes himself up from the moss. He’s dressed in a little green fairy outfit, and you do your best to commit him to your memory. His wings are truly beautiful, the way they shimmer even in the electric light of your kitchen. “I remember a pond.”
“Yes, there’s one right out the back way, must be a fairy circle there,” you nod.
“Thank you for the directions,” he smiles sincerely, and then, he begins to fly. You wonder how such delicate-looking wings could carry his body weight as he heads toward your open kitchen window. He lands on the ledge there, turning to give you one final nod of farewell, and then the fairy is gone.
You sit there for a few minutes, staring after him in shock.
How much wine did you have to drink?
Three:
It’s a Thursday like any other. You’re getting used to living in this cute cottage in the woods, spending your mornings waking up with the sun, heating a kettle for tea, and letting the creative juices flow in your mind before you ease your way to the studio to paint.
It’s the end of spring, and the promise of summer warmth is looming on the horizon.
You’re just beginning to contemplate breakfast when there’s a knock at your door, and it makes your heart freeze in your chest.
Although you might be getting somewhat accustomed to the seclusion, there are still very real dangers of being a single woman out on a large property alone in the woods, and this fact makes you hesitant as you head to your front door.
You can make out a large man through the glass, and you take a breath before peaking your head out. “Hello?”
It takes you a moment to recognize the man, as he’s substantially larger than the last time you saw him. The fairy is no longer palm-sized, instead, he’s well over six foot, and he flashes an awkward smile down at you. “Hi.”
You take in his attire, the worn jeans and the green flannel… you also note that he’s barefooted. “You’re wearing my grandpa's clothes.”
“Yeah, I uh… noticed the box in your truck, figured you might be getting rid of them anyways, so I slipped in through a crack in the window. I couldn’t just show up naked.”
Good point. “You’re big now,” you point out.
“Can I uh… can I come in?” He rubs the back of his neck nervously, surveying your front porch.
You take a breath. Part of you says this is a bad idea, but part of you is also saying that this is a fairy the size of a human man, and if you don’t hear him out, you’ll be wondering what could have been for the rest of your life.
You push your door open for him. “I just made some tea, follow me.”
The fairy’s footsteps are loud on your wooden floors as he shadows you to the kitchen. You give him your cup, pouring a second one for yourself before leaning back against your sink.
“I don’t even know where to start,” the fairy sighs, taking a seat at your small dining table. He cups his large hands around the mug of tea, as if warming himself.
“Well, I’m y/n,” you tell him.
He smiles thankfully. “Mingyu.”
“Nice to meet you again, Mingyu, how about you tell me how you’re human-sized and your wings are gone?”
“Fairies can transform. In my own realm, keeping my smaller shape is easier, but here- it takes less energy to just… blend in. It’s a sort of, um, adaptation, for survival, I guess.”
“It doesn’t make sense how you can go from tiny to massive,” you point out.
“Well, you see, I’m big for a fairy,” Mingyu laughs nervously. “It’s part of the reason I never fit in that well with others of my kind.”
You frown at his words, giving him the space to continue.
“Yeah, so anyways, I went back home, and I had been gone a while, and it just felt weird. I hadn’t fit in before, and I didn’t fit in when I got back, and I guess I just figured… you’re a girl, and you’re here alone, in the forest- I mentioned I’m a tinkerer right? I fix things? Was thinking maybe I could help fix up your place.”
Is he seriously offering to fix your house? You stare at him in shock. “I’ve never really thought about fairies being blue-collared.”
“Blue-collared?” he looks down at his flannel in confusion.
“Never mind, it’s uh, it’s a phrase, it means you’re a worker, you do building and stuff.”
“I’m really good at building and fixing things,” he nods solemnly.
“So… you want to stay here with me? Room, board, food… in return, you’ll fix up the cottage?” you clarify.
“I guess.”
You study him. “I’ve heard about pixies and fairies who try to lure people into fairy rings-”
“It’s not like that, I promise.” He meets your gaze. “Look, what if I fix your little shed workshop thing, show you what I can do, and you can decide later?”
You consider it for a moment. “I guess that could work, but first, you’ll need some workboots.”
“If you think that’s best.”
God, he probably does most of his tinkering while fairy-sized and barely wearing clothes… which isn’t something you want to think about.
Setting your tea down, you head to one of the back closets, where you’d stashed away a few of your grandfather’s possessions, the important things, unlike the donation box currently in your truck.
You find Mingyu some shoes, and when you go give them to him, he flashes you a smile and heads outside to get to work.
Four:
You’re doing your best to focus on painting, but your solarium gives you a perfect view of your grandfather's old work shed, where Mingyu is currently tinkering around.
He’s fast, and it’s clear he knows what he’s doing.
Your grandfather’s shed has a whole stash of tools, shingles, and wood, and Mingyu has already redone the roof, ripped a few worn boards off to replace them along the sides, and completed general tidying work.
He’s even weed-whacked the tall grass around the workstation, and as lunch turns into evening, he comes back from the woods with a small tree on his shoulder, which he then begins to chop for firewood.
You can definitely see how he’d be helpful to have around… and you can afford to feed him if he’s going to fix up your home. He’s probably already done a couple hundred dollars of work, maybe even a thousand- work that you’d been meaning to hire someone to deal with once you’d settled in a little more.
You get started on dinner. You’d planned on rice bowls, and it’s easy enough to make a plate for him. Then, you go outside, calling him toward you.
Mingyu’s sweaty, and he’s got some sawdust on his jeans- but God, does he look handsome and chipper.
“I made dinner,” you tell him.
He nods, smiling before following you inside. You note the way he takes off his boots at your door, brushing off his pants, careful not to bring any dirt into your otherwise tidy house.
The two of you sit down to eat, and he’s extremely verbal about how thankful he is for the food, and how good it tastes-
You come up with an avenue of discussion to distract him from his praises. “What would you living here entail?”
He pauses. “I hadn’t thought too hard about it.”
“I feed you, you do work, you live here?”
“Something like that.”
“How long do you keep your human shape?”
Mingyu takes a breath, setting down his spoon. “I’ll be honest with you, whether you see it this way or not, your grandmother saved me. I was wounded, I came to your realm, anything could have gotten me, but your grandma saved me, glued my wing, and kept me safe so I could hibernate and heal. I owe your family. My home isn’t my home anymore, please let me help you make this cottage your home.”
“No, I-” you release the tension in your shoulders, “you can stay, but, seriously, how long do you keep your human shape?”
“Is it a space thing?” Mingyu looks around. “I can be small when I sleep if it’s a space thing-”
“I mean, my grandma has a replica doll house of the cottage that her dad made for her, was going to offer that up for you.” It’s meant to be a joke, but Mingyu takes it completely seriously, nodding diligently.
“That works, I just have to go collect some moss to make a bed-”
“Are you being for real?” you ask, blinking at him.
“I should probably go back to my normal size when I sleep, it makes sense and takes up less space,” Mingyu nods.
“If you change your mind, I do have a spare bedroom.”
“Nope,” the man-sized fairy shakes his head, “the doll house works.”
“Well… if you want to go get some moss, I can grab the box of clothes from my truck,” you suggest.
“Let’s do it.” Mingyu is so easy, he just agrees to everything.
Soon the two of you are reconvening at your front door, you with a box, him with a palm full of moss. “The doll house is in the studio, I was planning to paint it.” Mingyu follows you to the solarium. In the dark of the evening, you have to turn on the fairy lights you’d strung up, and Mingyu lets out a breath.
Even you have to admit the space has ambiance. The solarium studio is a lovely part of the house, your favorite in fact, although, tonight, you’re feeling a little shy about your art strewn about.
“Did you paint all of these?” Mingyu asks, approaching your most recent work.
“Yeah, they’re uh, abstracts,” you explain. “I mean, I gather a lot of inspiration from nature, but it’s more a feeling than a specific thing that I like to paint, if that makes any sense.”
“It does,” Mingyu nods, leaning down to get a better look at your art.
“My grandma, she uh, she was an artist too, and so was her mother, and she gave me the house because she knew I needed inspiration-”
“Maybe that’s why she gave you me too.”
Your heart lurches in your chest, and you blink up at the tall man. “Uh… maybe.”
“So this cottage has a long line of artists and tinkerers,” Mingyu concludes.
“The line ended in my mother’s generation,” you sigh.
“That’s not true.” Mingyu looks down at you. “We’re here now.”
Five:
You wake up feeling as refreshed and well-rested as ever. It’s odd how much of a difference having a male presence in the house can make, even if he was the size of your palm while you were sleeping.
You’ve been here over a month, but you’ve not yet gotten used to the seclusion, the feeling of being alone. Mingyu is an unexpected comfort, and you quietly tiptoe to your solarium to see if he’s awake.
The nest of moss in the dollhouse is empty, and you move to your kitchen, getting a kettle started before looking out the window. Mingyu’s lumbering around in the tree line. He’s dressed in a white shirt and blue jeans, and damn does it look good.
You turn on some music, quietly making breakfast for two while trying to fight the urge to watch the beautiful man.
You’d slept in more than normal, another byproduct of feeling safe, and due to that, by the time you’re taking two plates of food outside, the temperature of the late spring air is already warming with the noon sun.
“Mingyu,” you call, finding him by the workshed, “breakfast!”
He bounds over like a puppy, and you set the plates down on a small circular table. The metal lawn set can be a bit rough, and you’ve tried to soften it with comfy pillows. Mingyu doesn’t seem to mind as he plops down, grabbing the bacon sandwich you’d prepared.
“Smells delicious,” he tells you, taking the largest bite of food you’ve ever seen.
You watch him, amused. “Did you get up early?”
“Yeah, I don’t need much sleep. Just spent eighty years sleeping, or so you tell me.” Mingyu smiles at you, a tight-lipped smile to hide the food in his mouth, you’re sure.
“It’s a nice day,” you sigh, leaning back in your chair and looking at the world around you.
The sun is out, it’s a little cold, but the sky is clear. Dew drops are in the last stages of evaporation, clinging to the green strands of grass along the hillside area that leads down to the pond.
“Every day is a good day for tinkering,” Mingyu agrees. “Which, I meant to ask- is there anything you wanted me to do?”
“Uh… like what?”
“I’ll finish the shed soon,” Mingyu promises. “I already have ideas about extending it, but, if you wanted me to paint the house, fix anything inside that’s a little wonky and in need of tinkering-”
“I think you should focus on the shed, if you want to extend it, you should.” For some reason, you’re apprehensive about him coming into the house just yet- you need to… acclimatize to his presence, and right now, having a wall of glass between the two of you is keeping your heart from exploding every time you look at him. “Do you uh… do you need anything to build your addition?”
“Your grandfather kept a lot of tools, nails, screws- and we’re surrounded by trees. He had loads of extra shingles, enough for years of repairs to the cottage and the shed.” Mingyu smiles at you. “I think I’ll manage… but, when it comes time to paint it, maybe we could paint it together?”
“Maybe.” You can feel your skin heating at the idea. “Anyways, I wanted to bring you some food, now I’ve gotta go inside my studio and get to work.”
“Sounds good, tinkering calls, thanks for breakfast.” Mingyu pushes the last massive bite of his sandwich into his mouth before standing up.
He nods to you and then you watch him go, sneaking a look at his butt before you tear your eyes away.
This could either be the best idea of your life, or the worst.
Six:
Mingyu had taken his time with the shed. He’d made it twice the size, and added more windows that your grandfather had left sitting around in the original structure- it’s crazy how much he’s accomplished using only the things that are left over and semi discarded.
Then, Mingyu had taken to restoring the inside. He’d spent two days just moving stuff around, tidying and dusting- and another day just cutting wood to fill up his firewood stash.
Now, a week after showing up at your door, he’s finally come inside to begin tinkering with old hinges and loose screws. He’s going over every inch of your cottage to make sure it’s up to his fairy standards, and you’re extremely aware of him, especially when he makes it to the solarium to begin to work.
The french doors have been a little off for years, one hinge is a little wonky- and it’s hard to focus on your painting while Mingyu’s standing there and fiddling- or, scratch that, tinkering.
“Watcha working on?” Mingyu asks, and you suppose he must have caught you staring.
“Oh, uh… it’s a new project, and starting is always the hardest part.”
Mingyu comes around your easel, looking at the new blank canvas you had pulled out just an hour ago.
“Do you have any ideas?” he questions.
“I mean… one or two.”
Mingyu cocks his head at you. “Tell me.”
You release a deep sigh. “I guess… I was wondering if maybe… maybe I could paint your wings sometime, in an abstract sort of way.”
Mingyu is quiet for a few moments, and you immediately try to backpedal, but he stops you. “No, it’s okay, sorry, I was just- I’ve never been someone’s muse before.”
“You haven’t?”
He shakes his head. “In uh… where I come from, my wings aren’t exactly that extraordinary.”
“Really?” you ask in shock.
“Yeah, they’re just green. I know a lot of fairies with all sorts of colored wings, pinks, purples- every color of the rainbow. Green is… well, it’s bland, it’s like everything else in the forest.”
You can’t believe what you’re hearing. “You seem to forget that I came to the forest for inspiration- the greens here are beautiful. If I remember correctly, your wings are like… sage and stardust.”
“Sage and stardust,” Mingyu repeats, his voice like a whisper. He cracks a smile. “I like that.”
“So you’ll let me paint them?”
“If it would make you happy.”
“It would.”
“Then yes, you can paint by wings.”
Seven:
Mingyu’s continued his daily tinkerings, but now, your evenings are spent in your solarium. You’d found one of your grandmother’s magnifying glasses, the type she used for butterfly wing repair, and Mingyu is the perfect muse, sitting patiently and letting you inspect him.
You’d spent half an hour just trying to get the color of his wings right, and now, you’re doing long brush strokes against the cream canvas. You’d found some glitter too, and while Mingyu spends most of the time sitting on your shoulder while you’re painting, he also offers to douse his hands in sparkles and do the small details for you.
It’s odd, thirsting for this large, beefy man during the day, only for him to downsize and nuzzle into your hair at night- he’s still so cute as a fairy, and his wings are truly beautiful.
“You see me like this?” Mingyu asks, fluttering off your shoulder to gaze at the painting. He’s so small in comparison to the large canvas. “These are really my wings?”
“They’re beautiful, Gyu,” you tell him, giving him a nickname without a second thought.
“Gyu,” Mingyu repeats, turning to look at you. “I like that.”
You hold out your paint brush, and he flutters over to it, balancing on the wooden handle.
It’s crazy how you’re already getting used to him- to the little things, Mingyu included.
Eight:
It’s gotten to the point where Mingyu wants to paint the shed, so the two of you decide to head into town together. It’s a small population, and you know that the sight of the two of you is raising a few eyebrows as you enter the paint store.
Mingyu sticks out, not only for his size, but his beauty as well. He truly is stunning, and you notice multiple women staring as the two of you wander around the store.
“So what coloring are you thinking?” Mingyu asks, heading to a wall of paint swatches.
“I mean… I just sort of figured we’d repaint it to match the house again?” you suggest.
“Well… it’s your house now,” Mingyu points out. “What are your dream colors?”
“My dream colors?”
“Yeah, I promised you I’d help you make it your dream home, didn’t I?”
Your heart melts as you stare up at this gorgeous man. He has such a soft heart, you can’t believe how much you care for him after only two weeks, how much he clearly cares for you- but you try not to read into it too deeply.
You turn to look at the paint swatches, truly considering what your dream home would look like.
You choose a pallet, showing it to Mingyu, and he nods. “This will be great.”
The two of you go to get the paint, and soon, you’re back in your truck. You try to play the radio, but it doesn’t drown out your thoughts, so you turn the music down.
“Did you notice how many people were looking at you today?” you ask.
“Hmm?” Mingyu tears his gaze from the trees moving by.
“Girls, a lot were staring.”
“Were you staring?”
You flash a glimpse at Mingyu and find him grinning at you… is there a mutual attraction here? Does he like you the way you like him?
Things are just so easy. Choosing paint with him for your house, letting him make your house your dream house- it all just feels so domestic, not to mention the fact that you generally don’t like people watching you work on your art, but you feel comfortable with him.
“I, uh… yeah, I look at you, we’re friends.” You cough, forcing your eyes back to the road.
“Close friends,” Mingyu confirms.
You turn the radio back up, and Mingyu looks out at the trees again, but he doesn’t stop smiling, and your heart doesn’t stop racing either.
Nine:
It’s hard to sleep. You can’t help but think about the car ride with Mingyu earlier.
He has to be attracted to you… right?
He’s been more touchy during your late-night painting sessions, and less afraid to cuddle up in your hair. You’ve noticed him watching you too… often when you look at him, you catch his gaze already on you.
Cohabitation with a man as fine as he is- well, you know where it leads, and you’re a little shocked you’ve gotten this far without breaking first.
You toss and turn in your bed, groaning.
God, when was the last time you were this horny?
Can you… can you touch yourself with him right downstairs? Is that weird? What if he catches you? Mingyu said it himself, he doesn’t sleep much- and… is his hearing better as a fairy? You don’t actually know much about his abilities when he has wings… maybe these are things you should ask.
You let out a sigh, bringing your hand to your breast through your sleeping shirt. In no time at all, your nipple is pebbled against your touch. You release another breath, closing your eyes and thinking about Mingyu.
You search through your memories, deciding to focus on the thought of him chopping wood. God, in his little tank top, his muscles all bulging and glorious- the way his sweat begins to drip, making the fabric stick to his skin, showing off his abdominal muscles-
You can feel your pussy getting wet, and you begin to glide a hand down between your legs-
You stop, opening your eyes. Fuck, you can’t do this. It feels dirty, sinful- and not in a fun flirty way.
This isn’t something that you can continue with- you can’t keep feeling this way. You have to tell Mingyu how you feel. If it ruins everything then it ruins everything, but you can’t keep this cohabitation agreement up if you’re falling in love with the man- or, should you say, fairy.
God, maybe you should have never opened Pandora’s Box. It wasn’t a flurry of chaos, not one you could see anyway, but you’re beginning to feel chaotic inside, and coming clean to Mingyu is the only way to get it settled.
Ten:
When you wake up the next morning, you move slowly. You have a shower, make some tea, and then, after going through an internal script numerous times, you decide to go outside to tell Mingyu how you feel.
He’s been painting the shed all morning, that much is obvious from how much he’s completed- and to make matters worse for yourself, he’s shirtless.
You almost turn and go right back inside, but instead, you pull up your big girl panties, taking a few deep breaths.
You have to do this, you’ll regret it if you don’t- just as you knew you’d regret it if you hadn’t let Mingyu inside a few weeks ago to hear him out.
“Gyu?” you call.
“Oh, hi!” he waves, and you watch paint splatter everywhere from the brush in his hand. “Oops!”
God, he’s so- he’s so- he’s a big dork, in the best way possible.
You watch Mingyu wipe his hand across his abdomen, clearing the splatter stain there. “Had to take my shirt off, painting isn’t my strong suit sometimes,” he explains, putting the brush back into the can before he approaches you. “What’s up?”
Suddenly, everything you’d planned to say to him just disappears from your mind.
“Are you thirsty?” you ask, voice cracking.
“Could use some water,” he nods.
“Come inside,” you instruct, tearing your gaze away from Mingyu’s perfect body to lead him back into your cottage.
He follows you like a good boy, taking his boots off on your deck before joining you in the kitchen where you have a cup of water waiting for him.
Your hand is practically shaking as you give him the cup, and he looks you up and down, an expression of concern appearing on his face. “You alright?”
“Yeah.” You swallow thickly, shaking your head. “Just… a little jittery.”
“Is there something on your mind?” Mingyu questions, taking a sip of his water.
God, he’s still shirtless, and it’s as if he doesn’t even realize it! It’s as if being half naked in your kitchen is the most normal thing in the world to him!
You take a deep breath, doing your best to hype yourself up. “I like you,” you say finally.
“I like you too,” Mingyu grins.
“No, I… I like like you.”
“Like like?” he repeats, cocking his head to the side in confusion.
“As in… I think you’re really amazing and good with your hands, and you’re handsome, and I enjoy spending time with you,” you blurt.
“I think you’re amazing, and good with your hands, and pretty, and I enjoy spending time with you too,” he counters, echoing the entirety of your sentiment.
You stare blankly up at the man. It’s clear he doesn’t know what you’re getting at. You wonder how fairies court each other- do they even court each other? Do fairies have sex? Or are they just… you don’t know, blossomed out of flower buds or something?
“Mingyu,” you take another very deep breath, stepping closer to him. “I feel for you, in here.” You put your hand over his heart, looking up at him, searching his brown eyes for some form of recognition, of understanding.
Mingyu’s lips part, and his gaze shifts to your hand, then, he slowly places his own over yours. His palm is warm, and he squeezes you gently. “Are you saying you love me?” he asks.
You blink… it feels like he’s skipping a few steps here. You love him as a friend, and you’re attracted to him, but you’re not… in love with him, not yet anyway.
“I-” You swallow thickly and decide to just be honest. “I think… things could be heading that way, with some more time.”
“More time?” Mingyu frowns a little. “Humans can be weird.”
“We can?” you laugh. “What’s love like for you?”
“Fairies don’t do anything halfway. We feel intensely, more so than humans I think.”
“Have you…” you cough. “Have you ever been in love before?”
“No.”
“So… how do you know what you’re feeling right now is love?”
“I know it because I would do anything for you. Just being near you makes me happy. I want to protect you, and provide for you- I’d give up my wings for you. I choose you over any of my own kind, because you understand me and accept me better than my own kind. I don’t need anyone else but you.”
You don’t know what to say, so you choose not to say anything. Instead, you get on your tiptoes, pressing your lips to his own.
Mingyu freezes for a moment, but then he reciprocates, wrapping his arms around your body to pull you tight to his chest.
It’s a slow kiss, an exploratory one. It’s soft and gentle and every good thing, but you get the sense you’re going to have to lead the build-up of this. After a few kisses, you lick at his lower lip, and Mingyu responds by opening his mouth, allowing you to deepen the experience.
His hands grab your hips, and Mingyu pushes you backward until your bum hits the counter, then he lifts you onto it, prompting you to wrap your legs around his hips.
As you kiss him, there’s a small voice in the back of your mind reminding you that this is a fairy. His original form is small… but as he grinds against you, you realize that what’s inside his pants right now is anything but tiny.
God, he feels so good- and he’s already shirtless, which gives you the perfect opportunity to graze your hands along his body, teasing the muscle you find there. Mingyu shivers from the contact, breaking the kiss.
He presses his forehead against yours, breathing deeply, and you can feel his heart racing under your palm.
“Do you want to do this? Even though you don’t love me the way I love you?” He asks.
“I want this, and I do love you Mingyu, I just…”
“You need more time,” he sighs.
“I think… do you remember how you said eighty years felt fast in the box for you? I feel like, you just move faster than I do, and that’s not a bad thing, it’s just… something we have to adjust for.”
“Adjust how?” Mingyu questions, looking down at you as his hands grip your hips harder.
You shrug. “Maybe you’ll just have to be patient with me.”
“Do I have to wait to say ‘I love you’ since you’re waiting?”
You smile up at him. “You can do anything that feels right, Mingyu.”
“This feels right,” Mingyu muses, pulling you closer to the edge of the table so he can grind his denim-clad cock against your core.
“Then do this,” you whisper, cupping his cheek and drawing his lips back to yours.
Mingyu doesn’t fight it, in fact, he melts into the kiss, and then, his hands are grabbing your thighs and he’s lifting you up.
You grip his strong shoulders, releasing a small squeal of shock- but you refuse to break the kiss as he begins to carry you through your cottage. He knows where your bedroom is, and it’s sweet that he wants your first time to be on an actual mattress- you’d half expected him to bend you over in your kitchen and have his way with you right there, but you suppose that’s not really his style.
You still have so much more to learn about Mingyu, and you’re excited to take your time learning it.
Mingyu lays you down gently on your bed, and his lips move to your throat. His hands find yours, and your fingers intertwine as he sucks on your sweet spot, making you moan and writhe against the bed beneath him.
“Fuck,” you groan, brows furrowing from the pleasure already coursing through you.
Mingyu grins against your throat, and then he begins to descend.
You’re wearing a sleeping shirt and boxers, and Mingyu’s hand is sneaking up the oversized fabric. “Can I take this off you?” he asks, pulling away and swallowing thickly, his gaze fixed on your covered chest.
You nod, but instead of forcing him to do it, you push on your wrist confines, prompting Mingyu to let you go so you can sit up, tearing the shirt off. You’re not wearing a bra, and Mingyu’s pupils blow at the sight.
He leans down, pressing his lips to yours again as he helps you back down to the bed. You relax against the duvet, enjoying the sensation of your bare chests rubbing against each other. Your nipples are pebbled from interest, and each brush of him against you feels like magic, especially when he begins to swivel his hips, grinding down against your pussy.
His mouth begins to move down again, and this time, there’s no fabric to stop him in his tracks. Mingyu’s lips wrap around your nipple, your fingers threading through his hair as you fight the urge to arch your back and moan like a whore in heat.
“Feels good,” you tell him, earning a groan from the large man who sucks on your pebbled bud even harder.
His free hand is on your hip, but soon, it’s rising to massage your neglected breast. His warm palm feels so good- your eyes close in pleasure, your body reacting to Mingyu and the foreplay he’s providing.
You thread your fingers deeper into his curls, gently massaging his scalp while he works you up, teasing you in the best possible way.
He’s clearly solely focused on you, you don’t think there’s an ulterior motive, a motive of getting you to beg or forcing you to wait, you think he’s simply enjoying you, and you love the feeling of being enjoyed in this way.
Even so- now it’s your patience that’s running thin, and you tug at his curls, forcing his mouth away from your breast. He looks up at you with confusion, lips parting in a silent question.
“I need you,” you tell him, swallowing thickly.
“You have me,” he assures you with a laugh.
“I mean-”
His hand slips between your thighs, rubbing your pussy through your boxers. “You mean, you need me here,” Mingyu finishes for you.
Fuck, he’s so hot- part of you had expected him to be a virgin fairy who’s never been in love, but it’s clear from his dirty talk that he’s no virgin.
Your pussy is wet, and you can feel a wet spot to match in your shorts, you’re sure Mingyu can feel it too.
“Since…” Mingyu takes a breath, and you can see his skin beginning to flush a pretty shade of pink, “since I’m the one who likes you more, maybe you’ll let me take my time and do what I want to do? Out of… pity?”
You laugh. “Pity? I don’t pity you- I kind of love you, Gyu, I said that-”
“Just kind of, though,” he points out, leaning down to bite your nipple gently.
You groan, arching your back and taking a deep breath. “Fine. Do whatever you want to me. Take your time. Worship me. Make me fall in love with you.”
Mingyu smiles, and then he whispers a soft, “Thank you,” before diving back toward your chest.
It’s clear that now that you’ve given him permission, he’s in no rush.
He worships your breasts, just like you’d told him to, taking all the time he wants to massage and lick and kiss and bite- and then, one of his hands returns between your legs, pushing your boxers to the side so he can access your dripping pussy.
He’s gentle at first, circling your sensitive clit and teasing your slit up and down. Then, after too much teasing for your tastes, he eases his finger into your tight hole. He’s gentle as he begins to finger fuck you, working you open at a snail's pace-
You think, as someone who time moves fast for, he really must be savoring every long moment of this. He wants to take his time with you, and for a fairy, that means something.
Mingyu’s lips are still wrapped around your nipple, and as he adds a second digit to your core, you think you might just combust.
“Gyu,” you whimper.
He hums in response.
“I’m close,” you tell him, beginning to wiggle your hips against his hand. “I’m so close-”
Mingyu’s palm finds your clit, and he finger fucks you harder, crooking his digits to reach a spot that has your toes curling.
“Oh my god-” you groan, closing your eyes and latching onto Mingyu’s hair as an anchor, keeping his face buried in your tits as he works you closer and closer to the edge-
One graze of his teeth across your nipple has you cumming on his fingers, and Mingyu releases his own sound of pleasure to echo the whimpers escaping your lips.
He’s got you pinned to the bed, there’s nowhere to go, nothing to do except take what he’s giving you.
He works you through your high, allowing you to feel every lick of pleasure as it courses through your entire body-
You’re a gasping mess at the end of it, and Mingyu gingerly removes his fingers from your pussy, pulling away from your chest to sit up on his knees, licking his digits clean as he inspects you carefully.
“Are you okay, my star?”
You shiver at the nickname, a whispered echo of your pleasure running through you.
“Yeah,” you nod, still trying to catch your breath.
“Was that good for you?” he asks, teasing his wet finger across your nipple and making you shiver again. “It was good for me.”
“It was so good,” you groan, shifting against the bed.
“Good.” Mingyu hooks his fingers in your boxers, tearing them down your legs.
You’re now completely bare for him, and you expect Mingyu to work on his jeans next, but he doesn’t. He lays down between your thighs, looking up at you as he peppers your skin with chaste kisses.
“Ready for more?” he questions.
You groan, and the groan turns into a laugh. “I guess I told you to do whatever you want to me,” you sigh, adjusting your legs so your feet are flat and your knees are bent, giving him better access to your pussy for what you know is about to come next.
“You did.” Mingyu’s breath is hot against your still pulsing core, and you grab at the duvet in preparation, knowing he’s about to completely rock your world for a second time.
Mingyu doesn’t say anything else, he continues to kiss up your thigh, and he doesn’t stop. When he reaches your core, he licks your clit gently, circling it.
You open your eyes, looking down at him to find his own lids are closed. He’s completely focused on pleasuring you, and as he pushes his tongue into your core, lapping at your slit- well, fuck, no thoughts are going through your mind.
You can only whimper, grabbing the duvet tighter, your toes curling deliciously as this man eats you out in a way that no man ever has.
He really is taking his time. It’s clear this isn’t just a duty or a ‘task’ he has to complete in order to fuck you, no, eating you out is as much his pleasure as it is yours, and somehow, that knowledge makes it even better.
You give yourself to the pleasure. There’s no anxiety, no racing thoughts, or pressures you’re imposing on yourself.
You know there’s not a time limit. Mingyu’s not eager to make you cum so he can fuck you, he’s simply enjoying the act of licking your pussy- so you simply enjoy it too.
You’re not keeping track of time, your focus is solely on the pleasure running through you, and the way it’s building.
Soon, you’re at the edge again, and you warn Mingyu, your thighs twitching around his head.
Mingyu groans in response, lips wrapping around your clit. A squeal escapes you, your chest heaving, back arching off the bed as your second orgasm slams into you.
This one is even more electric than the first, and it almost feels like you’re floating off the mattress- like you’re truly ascending to cloud nine, as if you - like Mingyu - have wings.
God, there’s not a feeling like it in the world, especially as Mingyu continues to suck your clit, working you through the most intense high of your entire life. Your legs are fully quaking around him now, your grip like a vice on the duvet.
Thank God you live in the middle of nowhere because you’re aware that you’re being loud.
Mingyu’s groaning too, his fingers digging into your thighs, keeping you pinned and in place for him to eat you through the pussy contracting pleasure convulsions that are threatening to overtake your entire body in an ecstasy you’ve never, ever experienced before.
The large man finally lets up, and you gasp, flopping back down against the bed. There are aftershocks of pleasure, and you jolt a little, goosebumps erupting on your flesh from the sensation.
You feel the bed shift, and you look from under heavy lids to see Mingyu standing at the foot of the mattress, finally taking off his jeans.
Fuck, he’s huge- maybe foreplay wasn’t so much of a want, as a necessity.
“You still want me?” Mingyu asks, joining you on the bed again, his breath hot against your throat as he grinds down against you, teasing his cock against your dripping pussy.
“Fuck, I need you,” you tell him.
Mingyu kisses you then, grabbing your hands and putting them above your head. He collects your wrists in one grip, and with his free hand, he grabs his cock, lining it up with your core.
“If it hurts-”
“You’ve made me cum twice,” you tell him, “I’m pretty sure I’ll be okay.”
“Whatever you say, my star,” he grins, pressing his lips to yours as he pushes the head of his cock into your tight, wet hole.
You groan desperately, struggling against his grip on your wrists, but Mingyu doesn’t let up. In fact, he tightens his hold on you, pushing his cock even deeper into your core.
The sounds you’re making are feral as he kisses you, his lips and tongue are hot against your own in the most delicious way.
You can feel your pussy stretching to accommodate for his girth, and when his hips are finally flush against your own, you think this might just be the most full you’ve ever felt in your entire life.
Mingyu breaks the kiss, panting and looking down at you. “You feel perfect,” he whispers.
“You feel perfect,” you counter, feeling a little dim with your repetition of his own works back to him, but also too fucked out to think of anything better.
He only grins, drawing his lips to yours. It’s a gentler kiss as he begins to fuck you, his motions slow so you can acclimatize to the massive cock that’s already rearranging your guts.
You get lost in him, and there’s a kind of safety in having your hands pinned down above your head. You can’t quite explain it- maybe it’s just a size kink? You can’t have a bondage kink, can you? Does Mingyu even know what bondage is? Do fairies watch porn?
You push the thoughts from your head, focusing on the cock that’s dragging against your sensitive inner walls.
Soon, you’re moaning loudly again, and Mingyu finally lets up on your wrists. “I kind of…” he swallows thickly, thrusts faltering, “I kind of want you to ride me when you cum.”
“You do?”
“I’ve… well, I know I’ve been a little rough-”
“You haven’t been rough,” you assure him.
“I just mean, the first two times you came, I did what I wanted, and I want you to be in control for this last one, don’t want to overstimulate you.”
It’s a soft idea, and you nod up at him. “I’ll ride you.”
“Good.” Mingyu kisses you gently, and then the two of you are adjusting.
He lays flat as you swing your leg over his hip, grabbing his cock to line it up with your core so you can slowly sink down on him.
Mingyu groans, his hands settling on your hips to help you be gentle as you come to a fully seated position on his cock.
“You look so perfect like this, my star,” he tells you, one free hand moving up to grab your breast, massaging it gently and pinching at your nipple.
“Think you can cum with me, Gyu?” you ask, beginning to bounce.
You watch Mingyu’s lips part in concentration, his gaze fixed on your chest. He’s clearly in a daze, and it’s adorable. “I’ll cum with you,” he whispers. “You’re so beautiful.”
“You’re quite handsome yourself,” you smile.
Mingyu’s ears turn pink first, and it’s so endearing to watch the massive man flush from a compliment as you’re riding his cock.
God, he is a perfect man, isn’t he?
“I think… I think I was made to be found by you,” Mingyu says, looking up at you with eyes full of adoration. “I don’t know what I’d do If I never met you.”
“Gyu,” you coo, slowing your thrusts. Mingyu sits up, allowing you to pull him to your chest, cradling him to your breast as your fingers stroke through his hair.
“I do love you,” he continues. “And… it’s okay if you don’t love me the same way yet. I know it’s fast, even for me, but… yeah.”
“It’s fast, but that’s okay. You don’t have to hide yourself from me,” you tell him, pressing a kiss to the crown of his head.
“You don’t have to hide from me either,” Mingyu promises.
He lays back down flat, and you move with him, your chests pressed together as you ride his cock, groaning into his ear.
Mingyu’s hands are warm on your hips, and he steadies you, beginning to thrust up to meet your movements.
You both release sounds of pleasure, and you can feel your hearts racing together in your chests as they remain pressed to each other.
You’re tired, but you’re also eager to cum again, so you push through, closing your eyes and focusing on the pleasure instead of the increasing burn in your thighs.
“Are you close?” Mingyu pants in your ear. “I’m close.”
His sounds are like magic, and they help drag you to join Mingyu on the edge. “I’m close,” you confirm, swallowing thickly.
“Can we cum together?”
“Yeah,” you whimper, muscles clenching in preparation.
Mingyu fucks up into you even harder, and you put all of your energy into carrying this out, into riding this man until you pass out from how good everything is about to feel.
He releases another grunt, and you press your lips to his own, which is all it takes for you to both fall over the edge together.
You feel like you’re flying again, it’s almost an out-of-body pleasure-fueled experience, but this time, Mingyu’s with you, and you know you’ll be safe with the man who knows how to navigate the skies.
He cradles you to his chest, keeping his cock buried as deep as it can go in your core. You’re both kissing each other desperately, shaking and contracting from orgasms that continue to surge through you. Your hearts are racing together, and you’re both trying to catch your breaths even in the midst of a passionate kiss.
Everything just feels so right, and natural.
It’s as if your body was made to do this, with Mingyu especially.
Soon, your orgasms are subsiding, and you’re simply kissing now.
Mingyu holds you close, not letting you go until he’s good and satisfied.
You take a deep breath, breaking the kiss to look down at him. “So…”
“So,” he grins.
“So… I guess this changes our arrangement a little?”
Mingyu laughs, holding you tighter. “Does this mean I don’t have to sleep in the dollhouse anymore?”
You find yourself chuckling too, and the contraction it causes of your pussy around Mingyu’s cock makes him groan desperately, his hand pushing on the small of your back.
“You don’t have to sleep in the dollhouse.”
“I meant it when I said I’d give up my wings for you,” Mingyu muses, turning serious as he looks up at you.
“You don’t have to do that.”
“The future-”
“Is something we can talk about later,” you assure him. “Right now, I just want to enjoy you.”
“I guess… I guess we can do that,” Mingyu concedes. His arms wrap tighter around you, securing you down against his chest. He tucks you under his chin, releasing a deep breath, and that’s where you fall asleep, completely content with your blue-collared, human-sized, fairy lover.
☀️ mlist + an. thank you for reading! we all need a domestic blue collar man who's obsessed with us and wants to build our dream house for us ✨MANIFESTING IT💅
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🔮 preview. “I’m happy where I am… but, when you cum, I’ll let you warm up while I fuck you stupid.” Mingyu never used to swear. He used to call sex ‘making love’ and something about it had made you uncomfortable in some weird way- so your soft lover has taken to using profanity for your own benefit, and you can’t help the way your body reacts to the term ‘fuck you stupid.’
cw/ tw. Unprotected sex, size kink, worship, Mingyu is a boobs guy, nipple play, fingering, pussy stretching, foreplay, multiple reader orgasms, hand job, shower sex, praise, dirty talk, etc… I pet names: (hers) my star. (his) Gyu.
👹 rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.7k I teaser wc. 175
🌙 starring. Mingyu x afab!Reader
bonus
It’s summer, and you’re more in love than ever. Mingyu’s made you rethink what it is to live in your cottage. He’s done everything in his power to make it your dream home, and his latest upgrade is a small rowboat that he’d handcrafted with the purpose of meandering around your pond.
You can’t stop smiling and giggling as Mingyu rows you around, the sunlight kissing his skin in the most beautiful way. He’s so gorgeous, and his soul is just as stunning.
Every day is a dream with him… but there are still things on your mind, things you need to discuss.
“Mingyu?” you ask, drawing his attention away from his haphazard rowing.
“Yes, my star?” he pauses to look at you, setting down the oars to give you his complete, and undivided attention.
“I’m just… I’m thinking.”
“That’s not always the best sign,” Mingyu teases. “Thinking about what?”
“Just… we’ve been together a while now, and, I guess I’m starting to look at the future more, and I’m not really sure how to envision it.”
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#mingyu#svthub#thediamondlifenetwork#mingyu smut#kim mingyu#kim mingyu smut#svt#svt smut#seventeen#seventeen smut#mingyu svt#svt mingyu#mingyu svt smut#svt mingyu smut#mingyu x reader#kim mingyu x reader
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the curse | yoon jeonghan series [ongoing]
There are plenty of monsters in this world, and plenty of mysteries too. And to Jeonghan, you are one of them.
› pairings: yoon jeonghan x female reader › aus: demon hunter jeonghan, supernatural au, demon reader, forbidden love, fated enemies to lovers, unrequited love › genres: angst, fluff, smut (18+) › word count: 36k
part i | the curse
› In which Jeonghan seeks you out after weeks of trying to resist you. But what he does not know, is that there is a reason why you are his weakness, because he is yours. › word count: 4.6k
part ii | the traitor
› Jeonghan cannot find an explanation as to why he knew you were in danger. Or an explanation for why he cannot find a way to keep himself away from you. But he will find out why. › word count: 8.4k
part iii | the shadow
› Jeonghan surrenders to the pull he feels for you, even though it is going against everything he believed for his whole life. › word count: 10.6k
part iv | hell bent
› Jeonghan has to go through the worst and the hardest moment of his life. He has to make a choice, breaking his promise to you and setting you free, or let himself be happy at last. › word count: 12.7k
part v | coming soon!
› author's note: this fic was a nice surprise to me. i never intended to write three more parts to my shortest one shot ever, but once the first part was out, i could not stop thinking of demon hunter hannie. it was also intended to be a 90's au, but i left so many details out that i did not see the point of cataloguing it as such. but the intention was there, i hope, lol.
discovered how much i love writing angst (quick, act surprised). i might write more fics like this one. also, one thing that i absolutely adore is the soulmates trope. it is one of my favorite tropes ever (maybe because i'm a pisces lol) i just love, love, love this trope. i think one of my favorite lines i wrote was in chapter two, A demon and her hunter, chasing each other through eternity.
anyway, this is not goodbye for this fic, i'll still have something planned for it because this has been super fun to write! thank you for reading ♡︎
#jeonghan smut#yoon jeonghan smut#yoon jeonghan x reader#jeonghan x reader#svthub#thediamondlifenetwork#kvanity#ksmutsociety#yoon jeonghan fanfic#svt smut#hannieween's kinktober#seventeen smut#seventeen x reader#svt x reader#svt imagines#yoon jeonghan x you#jeonghan fanfic#jeonghan fic#hannieween#hannieweenfest
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love me right — ksy
♡ pairing: roommate!hoshi x afab!reader ♡ theme: smut [18+ mdni], humor ♡ wc: 4.1k ♡ warnings: oral (f. & m. receiving), unprotected piv sex (do not do this), multiple orgasms, a lil spit play, head pushing, thigh riding, somnophilia, cum eating/swallowing, cumming in pants, like 2 seconds of angst, praise kink, hs is down bad for reader, gendered pet names (baby, good girl, pretty girl, etc), bit of fluff at the end ♡ a/n: this is part 2 to make me !! finally got this written hope yall like <3
Ever since you sort-of-accidentally had sex with your roommate for the first time, he’s been nothing but a fucking menace.
Not in a bad way - no, despite the fact that he's kind of an actual insane person he's always been and continues to be a very considerate and agreeable roommate. There's no problem with your living arrangements.
The problem is how fucking insatiable he has become.
You previously never thought there could be such a thing as too many orgasms, but Soonyoung really is testing your limits. You've never had so much sex in your life - and you're not mad about it by any means. But your roommate-turned-friend with benefits is absolutely, utterly, wholeheartedly obsessed with having his entire face buried in your pussy at all possible times. And you love every second of it.
Sure, sometimes your clit kinda feels like it's gonna fall off. Most of the time you've barely recovered from the last set of two, three, four orgasms (the current record is six, a record he's determined to beat) before he’s back between your legs again. But the constant cunnilingus leaves you more sensitive than ever before - and the more you squirm beneath his tongue and scream and cry as he takes you to paradise, the more it gets him off. One time you were wailing his name so much that he actually came in his pants, fully hands-free. The man simply worships you.
You've had various kink-related conversations over the past couple months of nonstop boinking, as these things come up. You wouldn't necessarily say Soonyoung is into anything too crazy (besides the occasional burst of tiger roleplay, anyway), but so far he's been enthusiastically down for everything you've expressed interest in. He’s the very definition of matching one’s freak.
“You know what would be hot?” Soonyoung asks you one day, approximately two minutes after you woke up and emerged from your room.
“Good morning to you too,” you tell him through a sleepy yawn.
“What if,” he continues anyway, “hypothetically, I were to wake you up one day by eating you out?”
“Soonyoung is it nine in the morning,” you reply as you give him a dull glare. You go to make yourself a cup of coffee, but he extends a full mug to you. You take the cup - it’s fresh, piping hot.
“Oh, thanks,” you say, surprised by the kind gesture.
“So?” he prods, eagerly awaiting your reply.
“I mean, yeah, I wouldn’t be mad about that,” you answer with a small shrug.
“NOICE,” he exclaims, pumping his fist in the air.
“BUT-” you quickly add. “That cannot be an everyday thing.”
“Right, of course not,” he agrees with a nod. “Soooo, when can I try it?”
“Well, I can’t tell you that,” you reply straightforwardly. “It’s supposed to be a surprise, that would like, defeat the whole point.”
A wide grin spreads across his face, but he shakes it off right away, playing it cool.
“Okay cool, well I’ll keep that in mind,” he says, grabbing your hand and shaking it vigorously. “Pleasure doing business with you.”
You roll your eyes at him.
“You’re so fucking stupid,” you gibe, but your face cracks into a smile. He pulls you in and kisses you.
“Love you too.”
You freeze.
You may have been intimate with him more times than you can count, but your relationship is strictly casual. You only kiss when you're fucking, and the words I love you have never once been uttered by either of you. You know he probably was saying it facetiously, but the way he said it was so nonchalant. So… realistic. You stare at him for a second, not knowing how to respond. His smile slowly drops.
“Oh, sorry,” he apologizes. His ears immediately turn red with embarrassment.
“No no it’s fine,” you babble, trying to backtrack. “I just wasn't expecting…”
“I was just kidding,” he responds. Then his eyes widen. “I mean not like that, it's not that-”
“It’s fine!!” you quickly interject before he can say anything else. “I know what you mean.”
“Sorry,” he murmurs again. He suddenly realizes he's still holding onto your hand - he swiftly lets go.
“Thanks for the coffee,” you tell him politely with a smile, trying to change the subject.
“Of course,” he replies, trying to smile back at you, but you can tell he's still sulky. He departs from the kitchen without saying another word. He emerges from his room about a minute later in athletic gear, his gym bag slung over his shoulder.
“Off to workout already? I thought you were going this afternoon” you inquire, but he's already breezing past you.
“Yeah, Mingyu just texted me and wanted to meet earlier,” he answers as he grabs his keys.
It’s a bad lie, and you both know it. But you don't press him further.
“Okay, have fun!” you say cheerfully. But an air of tension remains.
“Thanks,” he replies, turning back to glance at you for only a brief second.
“Hey,” you say softly. “Soonyo-”
He's out the door before you have a chance to finish even saying his name.
You stand there for a few moments, staring at the front door, wondering if you've just fucked everything up. You didn't mean to, of course. You were just so taken aback by the stupid L word. It's not something you ever expected to hear coming from Soonyoung’s lips, not about you anyways. But now it has you thinking. Was he simply joking around? Or does he actually have… feelings for you?
A small blip of a thought enters your mind: and do you have feelings for him?
You push it away before you can think about it any further.
The next few days are undoubtedly a bit awkward. Soonyoung is clearly avoiding you - not in a malicious way, but he just so happens to have business elsewhere whenever you're at home.
You're mildly annoyed, but more so you're feeling gloomy about the whole situation. You never meant to do anything to push him away - near-constant fucking aside, Soonyoung truly is a good friend. And now you find yourself missing him.
After an entire week of this nonsense, you decide to confront him. You pretend to be going to sleep, anticipating that he’ll spend some time alone in the common area. A few minutes later your hunch is confirmed when you hear the tv come on, its volume low. You quietly open your door and sneak into the living room. You approach the couch slowly from behind - when you arrive at it, you jump around and plop down next to Soonyoung.
“FUCK,” he yelps, nearly jumping out of his seat. “You scared me!”
“I'm horny,” you tell him bluntly, scooting up next to him. “Let me suck your dick.”
Soonyoung stares at you, looking into your eyes that are now mere inches from his. You can tell he desperately wants to say yes, but he resists. You give him a flirty look, trying to entice him.
“Pleaseeeee?”
“Well, I was gonna watch a movie…” his sentence trails off, unfinished. He tries to shift his focus away from you, but his eyes keep flickering back to yours.
“Seriously?” you ask, crossing your arms. “Since when do you turn down head?”
“Y/n…”
You wait for him to continue, but he doesn't.
“Yes?”
He looks you in the eyes again, then sighs.
“I dunno, I’m just not in the mood right now,” he finally answers. He looks away sullenly.
“Are you okay?”
He looks back at you. He clearly wants to tell you something, but he hesitates.
“About the other day…” he finally speaks. He pauses, in case you have something to say. You don’t; he continues.
“I didn't mean to make things weird. When I said that I loved you.”
“You didn't,” you assure him. You note that he didn’t say anything about it not being true, but you try to ignore that right now.
You take his hand in yours, patting it softly. He looks at you, surprised by the gesture.
“I was being weird, that's on me.”
His mood cautiously lightens. “You sure?” he verifies.
“100%,” you say with a nod. He smiles at you.
“Now will you please put your dick in my mouth?” you request again, looking into his eyes seductively.
A smile creeps onto his face.
“I mean if you're gonna be this fucking hot…”
You give him a mischievous smirk. You tug at his tshirt; he immediately takes it off. He groans as you grab his dick through his sweatpants, his cock starting to harden instantly in response. One thing about Soonyoung - you can do the bare minimum and he’ll have a boner within five seconds. You lick your lips, stroking him slowly through the soft gray fabric. He lets out a deep exhale, relieved by your touch - it had only been a week, but he missed you badly. He craved your touch, craved how insane you make him feel. He drops his head back, his legs spreading as he settles into the couch, shifting his pelvis up so you have full access to his groin. You rub your hand over the thick bulge, squeezing and pulling lightly, causing him to let out a pathetic-sounding moan. He is putty in your hands.
About a minute more of your over-the-pants handjob and Soonyoung is rock fucking hard. You slide off the couch, taking to your knees between his spread thighs. You pull at the elastic waistband, tugging it down over the pulsating bulge in his underwear. You place your mouth on him through the fabric, letting him feel your lips, your hot breath on him.
“Stop teasing me,” he begs after you plant several more kisses on his clothed dick. “Please.”
You gaze up at him, your eyes filled with lust. You reach into his underwear, retrieving his cock, prompting further pathetic moaning. He is leaking with precum - you take him in your fist, stroking up and down at a pace that he finds painfully slow. You place your lips atop the head, lightly sucking up his juices. He cries out as you then swirl your tongue over his tip.
“Aaaah,” he groans, his voice turning gravelly.
You grab his balls and take the rest of the head into your mouth. You hollow your cheeks as you begin sucking on it slowly - each motion of your lips long and drawn out. Saliva accumulates in the back of your mouth - and an overwhelming wetness accumulates in your underwear.
You draw your head back, gazing up at Soonyoung submissively. You collect your saliva, spitting it onto his cock - it trickles downwards. Wrapping your hand around his girth you spread it over his full length, coating his cock with your spit.
“Oh wow,” he mutters, nearly going cross eyed. You take his cock in your mouth once more, swallowing more and more of him until his entire length is down your throat.
“Goddamn baby,” he growls as you bottom out. You begin to bob your head, sucking him off. The sounds being made right now are grotesque - slurping and gagging from you, moaning and grunting from him. But it's only turning you on even more.
“Ohh that's a good girl,” he grumbles as he pets your hair. You increase your pace - saliva coats your lips, dripping down your chin, spreading across your face. The utterly sloppy head has Soonyoung writhing beneath you, babbling unintelligibly as his orgasm draws near.
“Feels so good baby.”
“Fuck you’re so hot.”
“Pretty girl sucking my cock so good right now.”
His other hand ventures to your head, holding you down as his hips jerk and shake. Your throat aches from him fucking it, your eyes well with tears - but your clit throbbing against the stickiness that has flooded your panties proves how much you fucking love this.
“Ohhhhhmygoddddd,” he groans through gritted teeth. “Fuuuuck, y/n… I’m gonna cum…”
He pushes your head down as he releases, giving you several hard thrusts as his cum spurts down your throat. You let him fill you up, eagerly swallowing each burst of his load. His hips slow as his climax wanes. His arms plop onto the couch cushions, his body sinking into the sofa as his body relaxes. He drags one hand to your face, grasping your jaw gently as he slowly pulls you off of his sensitive throbbing cock. He wants to look at you so bad, see that pretty little face with those pretty swollen lips covered in both your juices - but his energy is too drained to even lift his head.
“C’mere,” he pleads softly.
You pull yourself back up onto the couch, pressing your body closely against his. You lay your head on his shoulder as your fingertips delicately trace up and down his cock - it pulsates at your touch.
He turns his head to face you, his nose brushing up against yours. He lifts one hand, tenderly cradling your cheek.
“Can I kiss you?” he asks, his voice low and husky.
You feel a pang deep in your stomach. You've been scared to admit it this whole time, but at this point it's undeniable: you are falling in love with your roommate. And god do you want to kiss him.
“Yes,” you whisper, the word hot and breathy against his lips lingering before yours.
Soonyoung grabs your face with both hands, pulling you deep into his kiss. His lips hungrily lock onto yours, his body stilling except for his chest, rising and falling with slow, heaving breaths. He kisses you, and kisses you, and kisses you, holding you tightly, refusing to allow any physical space between you two. You want to stay here for all of eternity.
Slowly, your mouths part - he gives your bottom lip a few more tugs before letting go. His forehead rests against yours, both of you exhaling deeply in tandem. His hands drop to your waist, touching you gently as the warmth of his breath greets your face. He looks into your eyes as he holds you.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?”
You nod. Quickly tucking his remaining erection back into his sweats, he takes your hands and pulls you up with him, kissing you with each step as you stumble together into your room. You plop onto your bed, pulling Soonyoung on top of you. He rolls over, holding you snugly against him, your legs tangling together as he starts making out with you again. Your aching cunt presses against his thigh as you wrap your legs around him; you begin to grind your hips slowly.
“Wait,” he pauses. He reaches for your shorts, sliding your pajamas and panties off of you. You kick them the rest of the way off, discarding them somewhere on the bed, your shirt quickly joining them. He yanks his own pants off; you straddle his thigh again, your soaked cunt greeting his skin.
“Oh my god,” he groans. “It’s so fucking wet.”
Your hips begin again, dragging your pussy up and down his thigh, your juices spreading everywhere. You whimper at the stimulation, riding Soonyoung’s thick muscular quads as he wraps his arms around your torso. You cling to him as he draws you in close, his mouth wandering to your neck to plant a string of small kisses on the delicate skin. Ceaseless moans escape you as a fire builds in your gut, the burning pleasure of your climax rapidly approaching.
“Fuck I’m gonna cum,” you cry out as you frantically get yourself off on Soonyoung’s thigh. You feel his cock growing hard again - it presses into your belly as it strains against the fabric of his underwear.
“Cum for me babe,” his low voice speaks softly into your ear.
Desperately grinding your pussy on his thigh, you finally release. You scream his name as you cum, legs trembling as your body shakes with vigor. Soonyoung holds you tight, kissing your cheek lovingly as you orgasm in his arms.
“That's my girl,” he murmurs as he kisses your lips. You begin to come down, but your head is still spinning from the overwhelming stimulation. You try to catch your breath, slowing your breathing as Soonyoung rubs your back - but his touch and the warmth of his body sends you into a deep state of relaxation. He whispers something else to you, but before you can even process what he's saying, you are fast asleep.
You’re awoken the next morning by loud, moaning cries.
Still half asleep, you begin to register a familiar bodily sensation. Only when you pry your eyes open and see Soonyoung situated between your legs, do you realize you’re the one moaning. His face is buried in your pussy, licking you slowly, tasting you, savoring every moment of having his tongue in your cunt.
He lifts his eyes, noticing that you’re now conscious.
“Soonyoung what the fu- ohhh,” you question, but are cut off by his lips attaching themselves to your clit.
“Good morning beautiful,” he mumbles into your cunt, refusing to take his mouth of you for a second.
“Oh my god,” you groan. “I forgot I told you you could do this.”
He pauses, looking up at you.
“Do you want me to stop-”
“NO,” you shout, louder than you meant. You lift your hips, putting your folds back in his mouth. He smiles into your cunt, eagerly resuming eating you out.
“Good,” he replies, barely audible as his tongue begins working into your hole again.
Your back arches as his nose presses into your clit, making it throb desperately. He flattens his tongue, licking you all the way up, then swirling around the sensitive bud.
“Ahhh,” you cry out involuntarily. “You’re gonna make me cum already.”
This only eggs him on further. He wraps his arms around your thighs, grasping you tightly as the tip of his tongue quickly flicks over your clit.
“How- fuck, how long have you been down there?”
He glances up at you again, sticking his tongue out exaggeratedly as he continues licking you.
“I dunno, like five minutes maybe.”
“Five?!” you proclaim as your head falls back onto the pillow. You run your fingers through his hair. “That’s it?”
Soonyoung smirks, planting several kisses on your pussy.
“You were already soaking wet when I got here,” he informs you. “Must’ve been dreaming about me.”
“Oh shut the fuck up,” you pretend to be annoyed with him, but the moans escaping from your lips undermine your facade.
“C’mon, you like it,” he teases.
“Yeah,” you admit. “I do.”
He grins widely. “Good girl.”
His praise and the way his tongue is now circling your clit send you over the edge. You whine as your orgasm approaches - loud, pathetic sounds filling the air as he sucks and slurps between your thighs.
“Don’t stop,” you beg.
The sensation builds and builds, making you squirm beneath him as every nerve in your body erupts with overwhelming delight.
“Oh fuck- I’m cumming,” you shriek as you reach your high. You cum on his tongue, long and hard - riding out your orgasm on his face accompanied by loud, unabashed cries of pleasure. As your body starts to relax, you release the tight grip you didn’t realize you had on his hair, stroking his head as he softly laps up your release.
“Come here,” you tell him softly, but he doesn’t move. He seems to be even more relaxed than you are right now.
“Just a second,” he responds through deep breaths, his body sinking into the bed.
“Oh my god, did you…”
“Cum in my pants again?” he finishes your question for you. “Yeah. I did.”
He lifts his head, his eyes glazed over in post-orgasm bliss.
“You’re so hot, I couldn’t help it,” he says with an amused grin.
Finally able to move, he rises - his underwear visibly filled with cum. He crawls back up to you, plopping onto his back right beside you. He peels the ruined underwear off, tossing them aside, then stares down at his own mess.
���Lemme just, um…”
He goes to get up, intending to go clean himself off, but you pull him back onto the bed.
“I got it.”
You scoot yourself down, positioning your face near his groin. Slowly you begin to lick his own cum off of him.
“Jesus fuck, y/n,” he groans, his voice deep and low. “You’re filthy.”
“Don’t act like you don’t think this is hot.”
“Oh I do,” he says proudly. “Very fucking hot.”
He strokes your hair as you clean him up. As you finish he pulls you back up, laying you on top of him as he wraps his arms around you once more. Both of you are sweaty, and the embrace is nearly too warm - but neither of you want to move.
You lay there in silence, your head tucked comfortably into his shoulder, peacefully listening to the songbirds chirping as warm morning sunlight filters into the room through the blinds. Soonyoung is breathing so steadily that you think he's fallen asleep underneath you, but eventually you hear your name softly muttered from his lips.
“Hey, y/n?”
“Hmm?” you reply sleepily without moving. Soonyoung caresses your back, dragging his fingertips gently up and down over the soft skin.
“What are we?”
You lift your head, propping yourself up by your elbow. You look down at Soonyoung - he gazes up at you, waiting for your response.
“I don’t know,” you answer after thinking for a moment. “What do you want us to be?”
He reaches for your face, stroking your cheek gently.
“I wasn’t lying the other day.” He stares into your eyes. Despite the fact that he literally just had his face buried in your pussy, it feels overwhelmingly intimate. Your stomach churns anxiously.
“I really do love you.”
You knew he was going to say it, but your heart skips a beat anyway. Hearing him say it out loud, hearing him confess his love to you - it’s a thought that previously scared you. But you no longer fear confronting this reality. Now that you’re here, it feels comfortable, it feels right.
“I’m sorry if that makes things weird between us, but it’s the truth,” he says timidly. “I just can’t deny it any longe-”
You cut him off with a kiss.
You kiss him for far too long - but it’s never long enough. When your lips part at last, you gaze at him lovingly, a big, cheesy grin growing upon your face.
“I love you too, dummy.”
He stares back at you, mouth agape. He finally processes your words, his face lighting up with excitement.
“Really??” he asks you in awe.
“Really really,” you nod.
He embraces you with explosive enthusiasm, making you yelp as he rolls over on top of you. You giggle as he gives you a series of rapidly-placed kisses all over your face.
“Stop itttt,” you cry through your laughter. “That tickles!”
“Sorry,” he says with a big goofy smile. “I’m just really excited.”
“Yeah, I can tell,” you say as you grab his boner that has quickly returned.
He beams at you. “What can I say, you make my dick happy.”
“God, you’re such a dork,” you tell him as you roll your eyes. But you guide his tip to your entrance, shifting your hips to take him inside you.
“Ohh fuuuuck,” he mumbles, his eyes rolling back into his head. He starts slowly sliding his overstimulated cock into you, grunting when his whole length is inside. He rests, unmoving.
“You good?” you ask him.
“Yeah, just trying not to cum immediately,” he says, grinning.
“Soonyoung, you are crazy.”
“Crazy for you,” he says with a kiss.
You spend the rest of the day in bed together, making out, fucking, napping - anything, so long as you don’t have to leave his side. Soonyoung, being Soonyoung, tells you he loves you no fewer than 12 more times.
“So,” he asks as you intertwine your fingers with his, holding hands after he goes down on you for probably the fourth time today. “Does this mean I can call you my girlfriend now?”
You try to answer, but you’re trying to catch your breath after your millionth orgasm.
“Hmmmm?” he pesters.
“Gimme a… fucking second…” you mumble, pushing him away playfully. He gets right back in your face.
“I’m not hearing no…” he says, kissing your nose.
“Oh my god, yes, Soonyoung. The answer is yes.”
He grins from ear to ear, then wraps his entire body around yours, clinging to you like a koala.
“Yayyyy!" he replies as he nuzzles his face into you.
“You know,” he says after a few moments of silence. “I’m pretty hungry…”
“You better mean real food this time,” you tell him sternly. “I don’t think I could handle any more orgasms today.”
“Yes, real food,” he chuckles. “Shall I order delivery from that Thai place you like?”
“Yes please, I’m fucking starving.”
“You got it, baby.”
#ren's fics ੈ♡₊˚•.#svthub#hoshi#kwon soonyoung#hoshi smut#hoshi fics#hoshi imagines#hoshi scenarios#svt smut#svt fics#svt imagines#svt scenarios#seventeen smut#seventeen fics#seventeen imagines#seventeen scenarios#hoshi x reader#svt x reader#seventeen x reader#seventeen hard hours#svt hard hours
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not according to plan | hjs
summary: your ex-fiance is getting married and everyone you know is going to be there. when he calls to ask if you're coming, you accidentally mention a boyfriend. which would be fine, if you weren't very single. thankfully your best friend comes through with the perfect solution when he sets you up with a friend of his. what could possibly go wrong?
pairing: joshua x f.reader genre: fake dating, strangers to friends to ?? | fluff, slight angst, smut rating: explicit, minors DNI word count: ~22.1k notes/warnings: johnny suh as the ex-fiancee (sorry, he's not great in this), other idols born in '95 used as background characters, mentions of past cheating, food & alcohol, lots of "dates", reader is referenced as coming from a rich family, mention of being an escort (minus the sex?) smut warnings: making out, multiple smut scenes (kind of, it could be a continuation), multiple orgasms, teasing, they're both v obsessed with each other's bodies, protected sex, fingering, nipple play, oral sex (f. receiving), scratching/marking, squirting, overstimulation, use of lube, i think that's it (but let me know if it's not)
author's note: this fic is dedicated to the lovely @shuadotcom, i'm so sorry it took me literal months to finish fake dating!joshua but here we are anyway. i'm not sure how this one got so away from me either lmao. banner credit to the beautiful @wongyuseokie who (again) did this very last minute. thank you to @wonwussy & @kwanisms for the mid-fic beta. thank you to @wooahaeproductions, @horanghater, @cheolism, & @hannieween for listening to me talk about this and helping with things like petnames & dates.
taglist at the end (& join my permanent taglist here)
“It’s fine, it’s been years and I’m over it. Plus, I’ve been seeing someone anyway and he’s great. So I wasn’t ignoring your invite,” you say without a second thought.
It’s just a stream of consciousness. The lie comes flying out of your mouth faster than your brain can process it. That’s exactly what it is, too. A lie. You’re not seeing anyone and haven’t been in a serious relationship since the person on the other end of the call broke your heart.
“Oh, wow, sorry, I didn’t mean to…well, I didn’t know. My mom didn’t say anything when she said she had spoken to your mom about whether or not you were coming to the wedding,” Johnny says with a little bit of ramble.
“You know how my mom can be, I haven’t had the chance to tell her yet,” you deflect.
“I’m happy for you, then,” Johnny says.
“Thanks, I’m happy for you, too,” you force out. Somehow, it doesn’t sound like the lie you know that it is.
“So, it’s not weird, then? I mean our moms are best friends, so the rest of your family is all going to be there. A lot of your friends will be there. I know you haven’t RSVP’d yet, but…” Johnny starts.
“Nope! Not weird at all,” you utter, hoping that your voice sounds even. “It’d be weirder if I wasn’t there, right?”
“Probably, yeah,” Johnny says. “That’s great, though. Do you want me to mark you down as a yes? I can even add a plus-one, if you want to bring your partner.”
“That’s so thoughtful, but I wouldn’t want to put you out. I know how expensive weddings can be,” you say and try to sound sincere.
“No, it’s no issue, actually. We have a few extra seats that we left just in case we forgot someone or didn’t know about someone’s partner,” Johnny presses. “So we’ll see you both there?”
“Yeah, you will,” you hurry out. This conversation needs to be over.
It’s only an hour after hanging up with your ex-fiancee that your mom calls to tell you she can’t believe she had to hear it from Mrs. Suh that you’re dating someone. Which includes a whole lot of deflecting and promises about when she can meet this mystery man. Another twenty minutes after you hang up with your mom, you get a pointed text from your younger sister. The two of you haven’t ever been all that close, so she shouldn’t be surprised that you haven’t mentioned him. She made her side pretty clear when she maintained her friendship with Johnny’s new fiancée. That new fiancee, a close friend of your sisters, also just so happened to be the girl he cheated on you with. So, she can hardly expect to have a close sister bond. Yet, she seems oddly suspicious that she didn’t know you were seeing someone seriously.
Your quiet Saturday afternoon turns into a full blown headache all thanks to one call from the asshole that you really thought you left in the past. Of course, now is the perfect time for him to pop back up. Now, when you’re even between any sort of casual sex. Now, when you don’t even have someone that you can call up to pretend to date you. This is going to be one of the worst calls that you have to make when you have to admit you made it all up, that you will absolutely not be showing your face at the wedding, and you will also be changing your name before moving away.
For now, you do the only thing that you can think of doing. You call the only person that can give you any perspective on this whole fucking disaster.
“Well hello,” your best friend answers.
“Jeonghan, I fucked up,” you say without preamble.
“This is gonna be good,” he responds.
“I just got off the phone with my mom,” you begin.
“What did she want?” he asks, knowing that it won’t be anything good.
“Well, you know, to talk about this new boyfriend of mine,” you continue.
“You haven’t dated anyone in forever,” Jeonghan chuckles.
“Thank you for that,” you snark. “And then, of course, I get a text from my perfect sister wondering why she’s also just hearing about this boyfriend of mine.”
“Why do your sister and your mom think you’re dating someone?” Jeonghan asks.
“Oh, well, you know. Johnny called today,” you offer.
“Fuck that guy,” Jeonghan interjects.
“He wanted to know why I hadn’t responded to his wedding invite and assumed it was awkward because I was single, so I told him I was seeing someone,” you finally finish.
“For fuck’s sake,” Jeonghan says into the silence and you can imagine his face.
“Right? My life is a fucking mess and now Johnny thinks that I’m bringing my boyfriend,” you groan.
“I’ll start planning the story for why you suddenly left town,” Jeonghan says.
“For real, my life is over,” you whine.
“What are you gonna do?” Jeonghan asks softly.
This is really why you called him. Jeonghan is a shithead, sometimes, and he can be a bit of a chaos demon. He also can be a bit of a schemer, especially when it comes to winning a game. But, he’s unfailingly kind and caring to the people he holds dear. He absolutely hates getting into any kind of real conflict with his friends. There’s that whole side to him that honestly wouldn’t hurt a fly and always has a way to comfort. That’s the side that you get now.
“I don’t know,” you answer, voice just as quiet. “I’m just…I don’t want to let him win, you know?”
And Jeonghan does know. You’ve been friends since before you started dating Johnny. Even though he never liked him, Jeonghan supported you in your relationship. When Johnny proposed, he called your other friends and set up the best engagement party anyone could ask for. From the outside, nobody would ever know that he hated your partner. Honestly, he’s the best friend anyone in the world could ask for.
Before he got around to setting up the bridal shower, which he’d been quietly planning for months, your whole world turned upside down. Johnny cheated, had been cheating awhile, actually, and Jeonghan was there to pick up the pieces. Somehow, he was the only one that seemed to make it better, probably because he didn’t want to act like things were okay when they weren’t. It was easy to cry in front of him, easy to be vulnerable, easy to just let the process play out so you could heal. Even though he never liked Johnny, he also didn’t say he told you so. This had never been something that crossed his mind.
“Okay, you’re gonna hate it, but I have an idea,” Jeonghan says.
“Those are never comforting words coming from you,” slips out of your mouth.
“Usually I’d yell at you, but…” he trails off.
“I swear, if you’re about to say that we pretend to be dating like some romcom, I will hang up the phone,” you warn.
“First of all, that’s rude, I’m a great boyfriend,” Jeonghan says.
“I never said you weren’t, Hannie, you know I think you’re gorgeous,” you sigh.
“That’s true, I am,” Jeonghan says through a laugh.
“But, I also know you remember what an unmitigated disaster it was when we fucked,” you point out, earning an even louder laugh.
“Wow, and here I thought that it was actually great sex,” he says.
“I’m not gonna keep stroking your ego, I already admitted you were gorgeous. I don’t need to praise the sex, too,” you declare.
“Stroking my…come on, you’re making it too easy,” Jeonghan points out.
“Funny, because I remember you being the easy one that night,” you say, finally managing to get a shot in.
“I hate you,” Jeonghan snorts.
“I know,” you answer. “Didn’t you say that you had an idea?”
Jeonghan clears his throat. “Right, yeah. Well, I know this guy and maybe he can help you out.”
“What is he, an escort?” you snort out.
“Do you want my help or not?” Jeonghan asks.
“Yoon Jeonghan, are you about to set me up with an escort?” you challenge.
“No, of course not, just trust me,” he says.
Just trust me might be the three most terrifying words that could come out of Jeonghan’s mouth, especially when you’re not usually on the receiving end of his schemes. It’s not like you have much choice, though. The wedding is in six weeks and you have to find a solution, fast. So, what choice do you have other than trusting your best friend? How could this go wrong?
You still think this is a terrible idea, yet agree to meet Jeonghan’s friend, Joshua, anyway. Apparently, he’s somewhat new to the area, doesn’t know many people, and is incredibly easy to be around. There’s no mention of why Jeonghan thinks he might be willing to pretend to be your boyfriend. A part of you wonders if your friend even told him, but he’s not that cruel. So, whatever the case, Joshua must at least have some idea of what he’s walking into.
Several days pass between the nightmare of a call from Johnny and you actually meeting Joshua, which only adds to your anxiety about whether or not this is going to work. Johnny is asking for a name for the seating chart and for dinner selections. Your mom wants to know when they’ll be able to meet this new boyfriend before the wedding (because “meeting him for the first time at a wedding is gauche” and we wouldn’t want that). Your sister is convinced that he doesn’t actually exist since you haven’t posted him on social media. That you can at least answer to say that not everyone posts their entire life online like she does. It doesn’t seem to allay her suspicions, though.
Then, there’s the fact that you’re actually meeting Joshua for the first time at dinner. All you wanted was to go for coffee, yet he insisted. You couldn’t exactly press the point. Not when you’re planning to ask this stranger to pretend to date you just so that you can avoid the embarrassment at your ex’s wedding. On top of that, because Jeonghan really is a demon at his core, you don’t know what Joshua looks like. Don’t know who to look for. Which leads to you doing the only sensible thing and showing up 5 minutes late for dinner, hoping that he’ll already be at the table when you get there.
It works.
When you give the reservation name at the host stand, you’re immediately led back to a table. Without even thinking about it, you smooth your hands down the front of your dress, looking for a small amount of comfort in this situation. It’s not even that you struggle around new people, this is just…well, it’s a lot. It’s out of anyone’s comfort zone. Whatever you’re expecting, it’s not the man sitting at the table the host leads you to. He nearly stops you in your tracks.
His black hair is perfectly styled down to the pieces on one side that come down over his forehead. The black dress shirt he wears is open at least one button too many, but he makes the exposed chest look work in a way models would envy. Even though his pants are black as well, he makes it look classic and effortless, rather than too dark. That’s all without even acknowledging the soft smile on his face. This man would break a thousand hearts without even saying a damn word. While you’re appreciating him, you miss the way his eyes rake over you appreciatively. Miss the way his eyes trace your curves and the way the dress clings to you.
In one fluid motion, he’s standing up to greet you, a gentle kiss placed on your cheek. Is it weird if your knees are a little weak? Well, even if it is, there’s nothing you can do. You’re completely captivated.
“You must be Joshua,” you say. Brilliant, you think. That’s obvious.
“It’s nice to meet you. Jeonghan had nothing but good things to say,” he answers with another smile as he pulls your seat out for you.
“I feel like he hardly told me about you,” you respond. Joshua raises a perfect eyebrow at that.
“Then why did you agree to go out with me?” Joshua asks.
“Go out with…is this a date?” The question comes tumbling out.
Joshua’s eyes widen in genuine confusion. “Is it not?”
“What, exactly, did Jeonghan say to you?”
A lot and nothing at all, it turns out. Joshua tells you about how he’s somewhat new to the area, which you knew. About how he met Jeonghan through work, kind of. They work in the same building doing very different things and happened to run into each other getting coffee a handful of times before Jeonghan introduced himself. The two had hung out several times, something Jeonghan had not really mentioned, and gotten to know each other over drinks more than once. The very first time, Jeonghan had mentioned you and Joshua admits immediately being intrigued without pressing for more information.
In any case, Jeonghan talked about you pretty freely, a fact that’s hardly surprising. Before Joshua texted you, Jeonghan had mentioned, in what Joshua calls an offhand way, that you were sick of dating the same people. According to Joshua, through Jeonghan, you were looking to possibly be set up. (Read: Jeonghan thinks he’s crafty and isn’t going to come out and tell this man what you’re really looking for. Typical Jeonghan, honestly. You know that “offhand comment” was anything but. And you had the audacity to think Jeonghan would have to tell Joshua what he’s getting into. Rookie move.)
Now you’re in a bit of an awkward situation because this man is honestly gorgeous, one of the prettiest humans you’ve ever met. And, already, he seems like he might be sweet with a pretty good sense of humor. It’s just…well, you’re absolutely not looking for a relationship and this is the last person you want to get involved in your mess. Thankfully, you get a moment to catch your breath when someone comes by to take a drink order and suggest an appetizer. It’s just enough time for you to talk yourself into telling Joshua the real story.
To his credit, he only looks mildly surprised as you outline your whole situation, inform him that yes, Jeonghan does know all of this, and clarify why you didn’t actually realize it was a date. It’s hard to miss the way his eyes seem to sparkle a bit when you also admit that he’s absolutely stunning in a way that hurts your feelings. Easier to miss is the way his face barely falls when you say that you’re not actually looking for something right now. Interesting.
“So that’s the whole thing and now that I’ve embarrassed myself in front of you, I’m sure you’ll understand if we never see each other after tonight,” you finish.
“How am I supposed to go to a wedding as your boyfriend in a matter of weeks if we don’t see each other after tonight?” Joshua wonders.
“I…what?” you sputter out.
“Well, sure, we need to work out a few details, but I’m game,” Joshua says with a shrug.
“I’m sorry, I think I’m just really confused?” You don’t even have food yet and this is already the most interesting date you’ve been on, possibly ever.
“I, uh, may have left a part of my past out when I was sharing what Jeonghan knew about me,” Joshua says. “And honestly, I can’t believe I didn’t catch it or that he did this. I’d be mad if I wasn’t so impressed by how crafty it was.”
“I’m going to need you to connect some dots for me,” you admit. “Oh and also never tell Jeonghan you appreciate him being crafty. His ego is too big as it is.”
“The first time Jeonghan and I hung out, we went out for drinks, got a little wasted, and I told him about how I got through my university studies without any debts,” Joshua says, pausing long enough for someone to set the appetizer down. “He’s observant, Jeonghan, I’ll give him that. He noticed I had designer clothes, shoes, that kind of thing. And he noticed I didn’t pay attention to the prices of the drinks. So I made a vague comment about being lucky to have found a way through my studies without taking out loans.”
“I’m sure he asked you about that, he loves it when he thinks there’s a scheme,” you note with a smile.
“You’re right about that,” Joshua agrees. “So I, well I told him. When I was in school, I met this woman out one night and she paid me to go to events with her. She wanted, and these were her words, ‘someone young and hot’ with her. And the next four years, that’s what I did. I let people pay for me to go to events with them. Never more than that. I was clear that I wasn’t selling sex or anything, just company.”
You lean back in your seat with an appraising look. “An entrepreneur from the beginning.”
“Hey, no judgment,” Joshua says. All you can do is smile.
“I’m not judging, that was really smart and you’re obviously attractive enough for it,” you acknowledge.
“Thank you,” Joshua says. It doesn’t have the air of cockiness Jeonghan’s answer would. He actually seems sincere in accepting the compliment.
“But, I’m still not going to pay you to pretend to be my boyfriend,” you say, even if it’s a bit reluctant.
“I wasn’t asking you to,” Joshua shrugs. “You don’t have to pay me.”
“Why would you offer to pretend to do something like this? You don’t even know me,” you point out.
“No, I don’t. But, you seem like a good person. And I like Jeonghan, he’s nice…” Joshua says, stopping when you try to cover a scoff.
“Nice?” you question when you’re caught.
“Wrong word choice,” Joshua dismisses. “He seems like the kind of person that’s a loyal friend, like he would go into battle to protect you. Like someone you can actually trust.”
“He is all of those things, yeah,” you admit.
“And if those things are true, then him holding you out as his best friend means you’re probably all of those things too,” Joshua reasons.
“I try to be,” you agree.
“Plus, Jeonghan did mention you had seriously dated someone that was pretty rich, so I figure it’s probably the guy getting married and it’ll be a nice wedding,” Joshua says with a smile. The joke is obvious by the look in his eyes.
“It’s interesting that he mentioned Johnny, that’s my ex, being rich,” you idly comment.
“Is he not?” Joshua wonders.
“Jeonghan is a lot of things, but he’d never lie to his friends,” you answer first. “So, yeah, he is. Well, his family is at least. His mom and mine run a lot of events together, like galas and shit. That’s how we all know each other.”
“Are you rich, too?” Joshua wonders. There’s that little twinkle of something in his eyes again, but there’s also sincerity.
“I’m still not paying you,” you retort.
“Fine,” Joshua agrees.
You roll your eyes. “Okay, so what’s the plan?”
There’s a weird world’s colliding feeling to having both Jeonghan and Joshua in your apartment. But, Jeonghan doesn’t like to be left out of things. Once you told him that you and Joshua both knew about his scheming, he offered to help in any way he could. Which is likely just so he’s included. You’ll take what you can get. Now, it means that he and Joshua are sitting on your couch, scrolling through pictures on Joshua’s phone to decide what to include in an instagram post. That’s the first step you and Joshua agreed on. If you’re going to sell this whole fake relationship, then your sister actually is right. There has to be some sort of proof of it online. Which also means that your post has to talk about how you’ve been keeping it quiet and just enjoying getting to know each other without any pressure. Jeonghan takes credit for that, even if you got there on your own.
“I think I like this one,” Jeonghan says and turns the phone around to show you.
“Why that one?” you ask.
“Why not? Don’t you like it?” Joshua worries.
“I don’t know, I feel like my hand is doing something weird,” you point out.
“You look great,” Joshua assures you.
“Oh, ew, you’re not really dating,” Jeonghan complains.
“You do know you’re going to have to stop saying that, right?” you ask.
“Maybe I didn’t know either,” Jeonghan shrugs.
“No, I’m with her, you’re her best friend and you definitely would’ve known,” Joshua agrees.
“Why are you on her side already?” Jeonghan whines.
“Because she’s cool and she’s not the one who knew what I did in college and set me up,” Joshua says with a laugh.
This is how it’s been going for the last hour. You’re not really much for putting a lot of effort into your posts, so this all feels like too much. But, you know that it’s important for it to feel real and it’s important to get it right. You’re honestly pretty happy to just let the guys take the lead and go with the flow of it all. There are going to be plenty of opportunities for you to take the lead. You’re going to take your breaks where you can.
(That had also meant not putting up too much of a fight when Jeonghan told you to bring multiple outfits with you. Or when you had to change your hairstyle and makeup between the photos so it looked like they hadn’t all been taken the same day. Honestly, this was so much easier for Joshua. Then again, he’s the one doing you a favor. So maybe you can let him have it.)
After you finally get your couple pictures posted, and get a flurry of messages ranging from surprise to congratulations, you move onto preparing Joshua to meet your parents, your sister, and her husband. Jeonghan is actually a lot of help with that because he’s been around them a lot. Well, he’s helpful after he tries to scare Joshua about how intimidating it’s going to be only to give up when Joshua is unbothered. He’s so calm about everything that it’s actually kind of nice to be around. And he has no problem firing back at Jeonghan, which is really fun to watch.
You go through what your parents are like, what they do both for work and as hobbies. Joshua perks up at the mention of your dad loving music and sometimes spending his weekends just exploring new venues. It seems like there might be more to that, though you don’t press when he waves it off. It’s different when you talk about your sister, two years younger and already married. Not that you’re dying to be married or even care that she got married before you. That’s always seemed like a weird societal expectation, anyway. What does it matter when anyone gets married? If it’s their right person, then it makes sense. You being upset over your failed engagement really doesn’t have anything to do with your sister’s marriage, despite her instance it does.
It becomes obvious that you’re losing Jeonghan’s attention when you turn down his request to start playing games or watch a movie. It’s not that you don’t want to do those things, it’s just that you have a lot to cover in far less time than you realized. Sure, the wedding is still weeks away. What’s not weeks away is your first dinner with your family. That’s going to be around the corner. The least you could do, you figured, was plan a time before posting pictures on instagram. So, Jeonghan asks if it’s okay to leave and you almost sigh in relief. This will be easier without an extra person.
“Not to pry, but what’s the deal with you and Jeonghan?” Joshua asks when you settle back on the couch with a glass of wine.
“What do you mean?” you ask.
“I don’t know, I feel like I was picking up on something,” Joshua shrugs.
“We’re really just friends,” you assure him.
“Sometimes those are the best…” Joshua starts.
“Don’t,” you cut off. He worries for a second before he realizes you’re smiling. “We did try. Not so much a try, I guess, but we slept together maybe 6 months after Johnny and I broke it off and it just wasn’t it.”
“You and him slept together?” Joshua questions.
“Is that weird for you?” you ask.
“No, it’s just interesting that you’re still so close,” Joshua observes.
“I guess,” you say with a shrug. “He’s great, obviously attractive, but we just, I don’t know. I didn’t feel anything. Neither did he. So, staying friends seemed like the right choice.”
“Interesting,” is all Joshua says. “Have you dated anyone seriously since Johnny?”
“Not that seriously, no,” you admit. “I’ve gone on dates with different people and some of them stuck around for a bit, but nothing serious.”
“Not finding the right people?” Joshua presses.
“I just haven’t found anyone that made me feel like Johnny did at the beginning or even like I did when he proposed,” you say.
“I can understand that, even if I don’t really get it. You’re gorgeous, anyone would be lucky,” he says smoothly. You cover a blush with a slight eye roll.
“I guess that’s why most of my close friends will also believe that I kept a new relationship on the low. They saw me post-Johnny and have seen me try to date,” you share.
“Yeah that’s good for us, at least,” Joshua agrees.
“What about you, though? When was your last relationship?” you ask.
“Ah, well it’s been a little over a year,” Joshua says.
“Bad ending?” you wonder. You’re not sure why you press him on it.
“It wasn’t great,” Joshua says with a chuckle. “She, uh, well she decided that she just really would rather be with one of my friends than with me.”
“I’m so sorry you went through that,” you say, suddenly sorry.
“No, no, it’s fine,” he says. “She didn’t actually cheat on me, but she had started getting close to him and sharing everything with him.”
“Arguably worse, in my opinion. Emotional cheating is still a thing,” you say, trying to offer comfort.
“Thank you,” Joshua says. His eyes are soft and full of care. “And, like you, I have dated since then, just nothing worth talking about.”
It’s an easy transition from that into talking about your backgrounds. Like speed dating, except somehow more intense. You learn Joshua’s birthday, his parents names, that he’s an only child, and where he grew up. Nothing is too small and you joke about taking notes before you actually go to get a notebook. Joshua tells you his favorite color and his favorite food, tells you about his favorite memories, favorite places where he grew up, and favorite places he’s found since moving here. There’s a way that his face lights up when he talks about his friends that’s drawing you in. You tell him the same. That all feels a little surface level, which you point out. If this is going to work, it has to be deeper, more serious.
That’s when something seems to almost break down. Joshua suggests that you tell each other the deep stuff, the things that you don’t always admit to someone you’re dating. Or, maybe you admit it and don’t get into the reasons why. When Joshua goes first and admits that he’s happiest when he’s playing his guitar, even if nobody else is listening, his whole face changes. It’s like a completely different version of him. He’s got an open face as it is, that hasn’t changed, but you realize maybe he’s a little guarded behind the smile as well. Maybe there really is more depth than he wants anyone to realize. Maybe this is going to be more interesting than you thought.
“Can I hear you play?” you ask. His face is adorable with his eyes full of surprise.
“You want to hear me play?” There’s an emotion you can’t place when he looks at you.
“I love music, too, Joshua,” you say softly. “I’d love to see what you’re passionate about.”
“Oh, well, I usually play at this acoustic night on Thursdays at a coffee shop downtown,” Joshua tells you.
“You do? That’s so cute!” you say before second guessing it. He looks away like he’s a little embarrassed and you worry for a split second.
“I’d love it if you came by,” he says.
“It’s a shame that we can’t say that’s where we met,” you admit.
“Wait, that would be a good idea, actually,” Joshua says and you smile.
“It would be, but I also know events like that. It’s always a similar crowd so I’m sure someone will know that I’ve never been,” you reason.
“Fair point,” Joshua concedes.
“Why don’t we just say we met on a dating app?” you suggest and Joshua pulls up his face. “Okay, I know apps are lame and honestly, I don’t use them much. But, think about it. That’s the perfect reason why we didn’t bring it up until now, we didn’t want to answer the ‘where did you meet’ question by saying an app.”
“Okay, yeah, I do actually like that because it’s easy and it doesn’t feel like a wild story,” Joshua says.
“What about your parents?” you ask. “Do we need to make plans to meet them if you’re also posting about me?”
“We can figure that out, but they live pretty far away so it would probably just be over FaceTime or something,” he says.
“I also understand if you don’t want to do that because we’re just pretending,” you suggest.
“No, it’d be cool to have you meet them. Even if the relationship isn’t real, I’d like to be friends for real, so that’s not a total lie,” Joshua reasons.
“I’d like to be friends too,” you agree. “How long have you been living here, now?”
“Oh, um, like 8 months?” Joshua says like a question.
“I was figuring like a month or two with the way Jeonghan talks about you,” you laugh.
“You’ve been friends with him for years, you’re not actually surprised,” Joshua points out.
“Okay so now I guess we have to figure out when we started dating,” you comment.
“And everything else, but we can do it,” Joshua says.
You’re a little nervous sitting on your couch waiting for Joshua to show up. Even though you offered to pick him up for dinner with your family tonight, he insisted on being the one to drive. Of course he’s right on time, which you’re already realizing is a trait of his. He’s even a gentleman when he opens the door for you, just like he pulled the chair out the first time you met for the date-not-date. As you put your seatbelt on, you notice that there are a few things in the backseat.
“What’s all that?” you ask as he slides into the driver’s seat.
“Flowers for your mom, a bottle of scotch for your dad, and a cheese board for your sister because you said they just moved and she likes to host,” Joshua lists off as if it’s nothing.
“You did not have to get things for all of them,” you point out.
“Of course I did, but I also wanted to. I’m trying to make a good impression,” he says, making your heart a little light.
“That’s so kind,” you whisper out.
“Oh, I thought of something else,” Joshua shifts. You’re worried you made him uncomfortable until he speaks again. “Are you a pet name person in relationships?”
That makes you snort, something that would embarrass you in any other situation. It’s not the first time he’s heard it, though. “That depends on what you want to call me.”
“That’s a dangerous way to say that,” Joshua answers. His eyes are still on the road, yet you don’t miss the way he reacts.
“I don’t like overly cutesy names,” you say to diffuse a little bit of the moment. “Like, I don’t know, if you want to call me sugarplum or honeybunch or something like that, please don’t.”
“You’re just giving me ideas to take away my fun,” he pouts.
“Well, what were you thinking of calling me? Or are you even a pet name person?” you ask.
“I do like them,” Joshua says. “I’m not sure that I have a go-to or anything. For you, I might say angel or possibly darling.”
“I think I prefer angel, if I’m allowed to pick,” you say after a moment.
“Of course,” Joshua replies. Studying his face, you’re looking for a hint of mocking or insincerity, but there’s nothing to find. This is just him.
“Do you want me to use a pet name for you?” you wonder.
“I’d happily take one, no pressure, though,” he says.
“I’ll have to think about it,” you tell him. “Something generic like babe doesn’t feel right.”
“Are you saying I’m special?” Now you can hear the light teasing in his voice.
“I take it back, any more compliments are going to go to your head,” you huff out.
As you get closer to your parents’ house, you start to bounce your knee with an excess of nervous energy. It’s not until Joshua reaches a hand out to take one of yours that you’re even sure you’re doing it. There’s something calming about it, though. Nothing about him reaching out feels like he’s trying to stop you, just show that you’re not alone in this. Which is more than welcome. The last person you brought to meet your parents was Johnny. Given how that ended and why Joshua is around in the first place, it’s not exactly the most comforting thought.
Once you pull up to their house, you take a deep breath. It’s only to settle your rising nerves, but it also serves to give Joshua enough time to come and open your door. Even though you’ve told him that he doesn’t need to be this sweet, he insists. Without saying a word, he holds out a hand to help you out of the car. Instead of dropping your hand once you’re out, he uses it to pull you into him and wraps his arms around you. There’s this immediate sense of comfort, like you have actually been dating for months. You inhale his cologne without meaning to, something warm and woodsy.
“It’s going to be fine, parents love me,” he assures you when you pull away.
“I don’t doubt that,” you say, releasing the breath you were holding and your tension with it.
“So come on, my little granola wrapper, let’s go,” Joshua says as he lets you go to get the gifts out of his backseat.
It takes you a full few seconds to register what came out of his mouth. “I’m sorry, what did you just call me?”
“Is that not the one?” he asks, eyes alight with some kind of mischief.
“I’m not going to encourage this,” you huff.
“Whatever you say, jellybean,” he throws out casually.
The second you step into the house, you see exactly what Joshua means. Your mother is fawning over him in a matter of seconds, your father is making plans to show him his records, your sister’s husband is asking when they can go out for drinks, and your sister even holds back the snark. All during the course of the pre-dinner drinks and largely, you think, due to the gifts that Joshua brought. He had a reason for the meaning behind the type of flowers for your mother, a favorite musician who swore by the scotch for your dad, and even bought the cheese board from a small business that customized things.
Dinner comes along and you still feel like you’ve barely said anything with Joshua masterfully steering the conversation. He even makes it sound good that you met on an app, with his improvised story of wanting to meet people in a new city. According to him, he wasn’t expecting to meet someone like you and was done for the second he saw you sitting at dinner. It’s something real, that you met him for dinner the first time at a fancy downtown restaurant. And you realize you never actually asked what his impression was that first night. More than once, you catch yourself watching his profile as he talks to one of your family members. Everything about him is at ease and you wonder if it really is all fake. Not that you think anything about him is disingenuous, he’s just really good at making people like him.
The only hiccup doesn’t come until your mother is pulling out dessert. According to your sister, she’s got an excellent pie in the refrigerator that you simply have to try. You’re about to say something when Joshua beats you to it.
“I don’t think my little sugarplum likes fruit pies, but it sounds amazing and I’d love a piece,” Joshua interjects smoothly.
Your sister nearly spits out her drink, whether it’s at the nickname or him speaking up for you, you’re not sure. In any other situation, you would scold him for the name, but you’re a little stunned he remembers you don’t like pie. It came up once in a rapid fire of likes and dislikes.
“You’re right, she doesn’t,” your sister agrees. “I’d almost forgotten.”
(That’s when you’re sure it was another of your sister’s tests. Trying to catch you in some kind of lie about your relationship. But, it doesn’t work and you feel a little victorious for that.)
The doorbell rings through the house and you look to your mother, silently asking if she’s expecting someone. It’s unusual for them to have company calling this late on a Friday night. It’s usually reserved for dinners with friends or family or galas. Unsurprisingly, your mother doesn’t seem to know who it could be, but disappears to answer the door all the same. When a voice drifts through from the hallway, you freeze on the spot.
“I really just came by to drop that off for my mom, I didn’t realize it was so late. I’d hate to intrude on dessert,” the guest says.
“Nonsense, you’re not interrupting,” your mother insists.
“I saw an unfamiliar car, so I figured you might have guests,” he says as they come through the doorway into the living area.
Your heart stutters a little in your chest, feels heavier for seeing him. Somehow he looks taller and broader than the last time you saw him. He’s wearing his hair shorter and he looks more mature, somehow, like he’s seen so much more of the world than when you were together. Which is probably true, if you think about it. It’s been a couple years and that means he’s had more time working with his father.
“That would be my car,” Joshua says, getting to his feet immediately and extending his hand. “I’m Joshua.”
“Johnny,” he answers and shakes Joshua’s hand. Yet, his face looks a little tense and his eyes mostly stay on you.
“It’s just family,” your mother shares, though Johnny can obviously see that himself, “since our darling daughter finally brought Joshua around to meet us.”
“I’m glad she did, dinner was wonderful and the company was even better,” Joshua says with a smile at your mother. She nearly blushes at his compliment.
“Oh, hush,” your mother says with a wave of her hand. “I was just getting some pie if you’d like to stay for a piece, Johnny. Although, I’d hate to keep you from home.”
Joshua sits back down next to you, a little closer than is strictly necessary, and puts his arm along the back of the couch behind you. You feel safe pressed up against his side like that. Johnny clears his throat when he looks away from the pair of you. “Gabby has been out of town all week, actually, so I’m going back to an empty home anyway. I’d love to stay for a piece of your famous cherry pie.”
“Great!” your mother says and disappears off into the kitchen.
“What’s got Gabby away?” your sister asks.
“Just a conference,” Johnny answers. “There was a final banquet tonight and she’ll be home tomorrow.”
“She’s busy, away this week, bachelorette next weekend,” she says offhand.
“Keeping tabs on when everything is?” you ask of your sister. She looks at you like you’re crazy and Johnny looks awkward.
“No, I was invited to it,” your sister answers evenly.
Before you can even answer, Joshua is speaking up. Probably sensing your discomfort. After all, you hadn’t gotten to tell him that Johnny’s fiance is friends with your younger sister. They had gone to school together and been close. Stealing her sister’s fiancée doesn’t seem to have impacted the friendship.
“You must be excited with the big day getting so close,” Joshua says. He moves his arm from behind you so that he can take your hand on your thigh. It makes you look down at your hands before glancing at him, only to find his gaze on you already. It also means you miss the way Johnny follows the movement.
“Uh, yeah, I mean, I’m definitely excited. It’s just been a lot of planning,” Johnny says.
“I bet,” Joshua says. “Thank you so much for inviting me, I know how stressful changes can be.”
“It’s no problem, I’m happy you’ll both be there,” Johnny says.
With almost a practiced subtlety, Joshua squeezes your hand. There’s so much in that one movement. A reassurance, a reminder to breathe, a reminder that he’s there, a promise that everything is going to be okay. Your heart hurts seeing Johnny sitting in the living room so casually as if nothing happened, but it doesn’t hurt as much as you expected. Maybe that has something to do with this impossibly kind, completely idiotic person next to you. You also can’t help the way your gaze lands on him. Just in profile, at first, before he senses your look and turns to you with a dazzling smile. It’s like there’s nobody else in the world but the two of you.
The conversation shifts slightly when your mother comes back in with a tray full of pie slices and your father comes back with whatever record he was looking for to show Joshua. Just like that, you survive your first in-person interaction with Johnny. Actually come out of it feeling like you might be able to handle this. The smile you send Joshua while he’s eating his pie is so fond that you’re not even sure who you are.
“I can’t believe you didn’t call me last night,” Jeonghan says in lieu of a hello.
“Hello to you too, I’m good, thanks for asking,” you retort.
“Greetings are for people who remember their best friends, not for people who send a single sentence recap after bringing their fake boyfriend home to meet the family,” Jeonghan states immediately.
“That’s a very long rule,” you note.
“Deserved, though,” Jeonghan says.
“I was tired, Han, it was a long night,” you explain.
“A long night where your ex showed up,” he reminds you.
“That actually wasn’t so bad,” you admit. “Joshua made it feel pretty easy.”
“Oh did he now?”
You don’t have to be in the same room as Jeonghan to hear the expression on his face when he says that. “It was just easy, Jeonghan, nothing more than that.”
“What did your parents think?” he asks, switching gears.
“They loved him, like actually loved him. My mom was enamored and kept calling him handsome. My dad was talking about music with him and making plans to go check out some acoustic music venue. Even the ice queen couldn’t find anything to fault him for,” you share.
“She’s less of an ice queen and more of a mean girl and a bitch,” Jeonghan adds.
“You said it,” you mumble.
“I mean, come on, who thinks it’s okay for their friend to sleep with their sister’s fiancé? And then stays friends with the girl?” Jeonghan gets really defensive with this. He would ride for you to the ends of the world, which you do love. Just not today.
“I don’t wanna relive that whole thing, it’s done and over. Nothing to do now,” you say, weariness seeping into your voice.
“Would you want to do anything about it?” Jeonghan asks.
“What do you mean?” You answer the question with a question.
“Like would you want to go back to when you were with Johnny?” Jeonghan asks.
You think about it for half a second. “No.”
“That was fast,” Jeonghan comments.
“What’s there to go back to? He made his choice and I’m fine, honestly. It was weird seeing him and hearing him talk about his wedding, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought,” you say.
“Is that because of your Prince Charming?” Your best friend, always doing the most, puts this question into a sing-song voice.
“He’s not a Prince Charming. You’re so annoying,” you scoff.
“I don’t know, he sure seems to be saving you,” Jeonghan presses.
“I can’t with…” you start, trailing off at the knock on your door.
“Who’s there?” Jeonghan asks.
“No clue,” you answer, getting off your couch to go see.
“I bet it’s Prince Charming,” Jeonghan laughs out.
“Would you fuck…” you begin as you open the door to find the very subject of your conversation on the other side, “off.”
“I’m right aren’t I?” Jeonghan is nearly shrieking with glee.
“Sorry, gotta go,” you say.
“Oh no, no, no,” Jeonghan tries.
You’re stepping aside to let Joshua into your apartment. “I’ll see you tomorrow for brunch.”
“Let me know if I need to add one more to the reservation,” Jeonghan says.
“Goodbye,” you say with an eye roll Jeonghan can’t see, but will surely hear. You hang up as soon as he also says goodbye.
“Jeonghan?” Joshua guesses.
“Unfortunately,” you confirm.
“I hope I wasn’t interrupting,” Joshua says. It’s nothing like when someone says it out of forced courtesy. He actually seems like he’s making sure he’s not intruding.
“No, not at all, I just wasn’t expecting you,” you admit.
“Sometimes that’s the best time to come over,” Joshua says with a shrug.
“Does that mean you have a plan?” you wonder.
“Yup,” Joshua says.
“Gonna tell me what it is?” you ask.
“Nope,” he says with a concerning smile, popping the end of nope. “Go put on something comfortable but with layers. And we’re not going hiking or anything like that.”
An hour later, you’re pulling off the road in an area you’ve never been to, even with as long as you’ve lived here. The views are instantly enough to take your breath away. You can see the whole city below you, all the bustle of traffic and skyscrapers. Somewhere, you know there are people rushing to and fro, too busy to stop and appreciate what’s around them. Straight ahead, you can see the way the low clouds glide around, splitting around the very tops of the buildings. It’s beautiful and it also makes you realize just how small you are.
While you’ve been appreciating the views in front of you, Joshua has been gathering his supplies from the trunk. By the time you turn around, he’s laying a blanket and basket down on the ground in front of the car.
“Is this…did you set up a picnic?” you ask.
“I wanted to show you this place and figured some food might be nice,” he says with an easy smile.
“That’s so sweet,” you say earnestly.
You settle on the blanket next to him and look through the food he’s pulling out. There are some of your favorite things and some things you’re not even sure you’ve seen before. Somehow, though, you feel like they might become some of your new favorites. He even brought plates and he sets about putting one together for you to pick at.
Joshua tells you about how this is his favorite place and he found it completely by accident. He loves being down in the city and around all the people, but there’s something nice about seeing things from this perspective too. It’s like he can just disconnect for a while. Turn off his phone. Read or listen to music. Just be totally alone. It’s how he works through a problem or gets the perspective he needs.
“I can’t believe you’re sharing it with me,” you admit and his eyes light up with his smile.
“I just thought, after last night, you might appreciate having a place to get away from it all,” Joshua says.
You want to say something, anything, really, to acknowledge what Joshua just said. Try to say something. Your throat doesn’t want to cooperate, it seems. Your brain, either. In fact, all you can manage to do is turn away to hide the tears. Joshua is observant, though. He doesn’t say anything, just pulls you into his chest and runs his hand along your back. He quietly soothes you as you cry out a lot of emotions you didn’t even realize you were experiencing.
And something about him comforting you, this near stranger who doesn’t actually owe you anything, sets you off more. In the early days of your relationship with Johnny, you know it was good. It must have been. Surely, it was more than a relationship between two people who had known each other for years with families that were intertwined. You don’t remember it anymore. Don’t remember him ever holding you like this without even knowing what was wrong. Don’t remember him taking you on a date like this just because he thought you would enjoy it. Since you haven’t seriously dated anyone since the break-up, he also feels like your only frame of reference. That makes you sad for an entirely different reason. Who loses it over someone just being a little kind?
“I’m so sorry,” you finally say when you manage to pull yourself together.
“For what?” he asks.
“For just crying like that and being such a mess,” you say.
Joshua shakes his head. Moves his hand up to your face and waits for confirmation that it’s okay. When you nod, he gently wipes the tears from under your eyes. “You have nothing to apologize for. What you’re going through with your ex, most of us could never even imagine that kind of pain.”
“But still, you barely know me and here you are trying to be kind and all I can do is cry,” you say.
“First of all, I think last night and the food I put together show I’ve actually learned a lot about you in a short time,” he says and you have to laugh at that. He’s right. “Second, I’m just happy you feel safe enough with me to cry. It’s not healthy to hold all that in. You’re not in this alone.”
That brings you up short more than anything. He’s right, again (an annoying habit, if you’re being honest). You don’t feel any hesitation around him. Nothing to stop you from crying if you feel like crying. That’s unusual, to say the least. Normally, you’ll do anything to avoid anyone seeing you emotional. But, this man you just met is different. He’s safe. You’re not sure how or why, but you know you can trust him.
“Are you free tomorrow for brunch?” you ask. Joshua gives you a quizzical look for a moment at the sudden topic change.
“Yeah, why?” he asks.
“I just need to send one quick text and then I want to do what you said you normally do here. Disconnect from the world and just appreciate the afternoon,” you say and find yourself smiling along with his smile. He really is so beautiful.
You: add one to the reservation for brunch tomorrow and i’ll call you tonight when i’m home
You switch your phone into Do Not Disturb before the response comes and turn all your attention back to Joshua.
Over the next couple weeks, Joshua slips seamlessly into your life and your existing friendships. Some of them, like those closest to you that come along to the Sunday brunches, know the whole story. It’s not like they would believe you had kept a relationship secret for that long, anyway. And it’s good to have a few extra sets of eyes and ears helping to sell the story. Other friends get the same story that your family and Johnny got. It’s not that you don’t trust them, you do. It’s more important to keep the circle of people who know the real story as small as possible, though, so that it actually succeeds. All your friends adore him from the second they meet him. The only surprise is how well Jeonghan seems to be adjusting to sharing your time. He wants to give you a hard time, yet he doesn’t.
You meet all Joshua’s friends and coworkers, too. It feels way easier than it should the first time you join him and his coworkers after work for drinks. They spend most of the time giving Joshua a hard time that he’s kept you to himself for so long. It’s easy to fall into step and you find that you do know him a lot better than you think. So, it’s just as easy for you to jump in when they’re giving him a hard time. He pretends to be annoyed, but you can tell by the way he smiles that he likes it. It’s one of those genuine smiles that makes his eyes bigger and brighter. Everything just feels…easy. Like this whole thing wasn’t actually a bad idea after all.
Your favorite part might be the first time you got with him to an Open Mic Night and get to see him play. He’s got that easy kind of confidence on the guitar. Like he knows he’s talented, but not in a cocky way. It’s his singing that catches you off guard. His voice moves over the notes with an ease that makes you wonder why this isn’t something he’s doing for a living. He’s got this way of pulling you into songs that you don’t even know. And he’s so kind with the people that show up just to see him play. They all seem just as happy to meet you and know that he’s happy.
There’s only been one part that’s been difficult. Not difficult, exactly, but not as comfortable as some of the other things. While you and Joshua talked through anything and everything to prepare to start a fake relationship, you covered comfort levels with physical affection. You both say you’re comfortable with physical touch, though he seems to seek it out more than you do. That includes at least some level of PDA as a couple. You’ve never really been one to just randomly make out with a partner in public, but you’ve never been shy about expressing affection either. It was fine, when it was all theoretical.
In actual practice, it’s been a little more difficult. The first time Joshua had pressed a kiss to the side of your head while you were out with people that didn’t know it was fake caught you off guard. It shouldn’t have, he asked before doing it and you confirmed it was fine. What you hadn’t been entirely prepared for was how it would feel when he did it. Or how it would feel that he was so casual about it, like it was the most normal thing in the world. Like it wasn’t making you rethink everything in your life.
Tonight, you’re hanging out with friends at Hyejin’s house. You and her have been friends since before you even started school. So, she knows what’s really going on with Joshua. Your other friends there, though, are mostly not in on it. Which is fine. You’re shockingly comfortable with the song and dance.
It’s not actually fine.
It starts the same as any other time you’ve been out somewhere with him. You’re sitting close together on the couch, thighs pressed together, with his arm behind you along the back of the couch. Periodically, his fingers play with the sleeve of your shirt. It’s an absentminded habit and you’re used to it. He’s usually keeping some sort of contact with you in a very subtle way. You learned right away that he did like physical touch, but it was rarely something obvious. One drink in and his affection got a little more obvious. Arm wrapped firmly around you. More kisses pressed to the side of your head.
Two drinks in and it changes again. He removes his arm from around you in favor of holding your hand. Playing with your fingers while he’s having other conversations, like he doesn’t even realize. Hand squeezing your thigh. Or tracing patterns into the material of your pants. Head dropping down on your shoulder when he’s not talking to someone else. And it’s definitely not fine. You’re nursing your drink, but even if you weren’t, his constant presence would sober you. Since you’ve just finally finished your first, you think maybe a second is a good idea.
It’s not. Joshua gets another drink, his third, and you decline. Instead, you stick with the water you’ve been drinking since you couldn’t even finish your second. You want to be able to respond, whatever happens. Respond to whatever new form of affection unlocks with this next drink.
“I hope you stick around, you’re my favorite of the partners that we’ve met,” Mimi announces to Joshua when he plops back down next to you.
You’re glad that you hadn’t taken a sip because it would’ve come out immediately. Mimi has been a friend for a long time as well, and you love her, but she doesn’t know the truth.
“Don’t I know it,” Joshua agrees, earning a lot of laughter.
“Have you met Johnny yet? I know you’re going to the wedding,” Taehyung wonders.
“Yeah Johnny showed up magically the night I brought him by to meet my parents, sister, and brother-in-law,” you say, regaining some composure.
“I think you traded up,” Joshua says, eyes laser focused on you.
You’re not so lucky this time and you just took a sip. You nearly choke. “Do you?”
“Definitely,” Joshua insists.
“I agree,” Jimin says and Mimi elbows him in the side. “What?”
“You’re going to the wedding,” she says.
“So? He’s a fucking tool,” Jimin shrugs off.
“Are you all going, then?” Joshua asks.
“A good portion of us, yeah,” Hyejin says. “Family connections, you know?”
“I wasn’t invited,” Mimi pouts.
“Want to come?” Taehyung asks and Mimi laughs.
“Tae, my love, you can’t just invite people,” Mimi says and shakes her head.
“I have a plus-one,” Taehyung says with a shrug. “I think we all knew I wouldn’t make it to the wedding in my relationship. But, Johnny still thinks I’m bringing someone.”
“Damn, okay. I’m in,” Mimi says.
“I’m not going either, my family ties weren’t enough to get an invite,” Jeonghan says without any sorrow in his eyes.
“That’s because of what you said to him after the break up,” Hyejin interrupts with a laugh.
“I don’t remember saying anything that bad,” Jeonghan shrugs, and examines his finger nails to show how little he cares.
“Remind me to show you what he said some time, it was fucking gold,” Hyejin says to Joshua.
“Do you have it saved?” you ask.
“I should have it framed, honestly,” Hyejin says. “Get you a best friend like Jeonghan, for real, for real.”
“Hey, that’s my best friend, get your own,” you joke.
“That’s a shame you won’t be there though, Han, I could’ve used the familiar face,” Joshua says.
“Like you’re going to be paying attention to anyone but your date,” Hyejin teases.
“Can you blame me? I still can’t believe how lucky I got,” Joshua says without any hint that he’s pretending. It makes your heart skip a couple beats as you try to catch your breath.
“Ugh, I’m so single,” Mimi whines.
“Maybe not after the wedding,” Hyejin teases.
The conversations devolve from there into separate, smaller chats. Joshua is back to tracing patterns into your leg. Without warning, he pops his head up and places a quick peck on your lips before dropping his head onto your shoulder again. He’s so nonchalant about it that you’re not really sure it even happened. You’ve kissed a couple times like that, quick pecks in public. But, it’s always been when you’ve talked about it. It isn’t until you look up to meet Jeonghan’s eyes that you know it all really happened.
Joshua, unaware that he’s just turned your world a little upside down, moves his head to look at you again. “You’re beautiful, you know.”
It’s barely a whisper and you know he’s not drunk. He’s not sober either, though. And you’ve had drinks around each other before. He’s just never been quite so glued to your side or free with the compliments. You’re also not usually so singularly focused on him. A fact that doesn’t go entirely unnoticed.
“Thank you,” you whisper back.
“I’m kinda hungry,” he continues in a bit of a whine.
“Well you were the one who thought skipping dinner was smart,” you tease him.
“But my little honeybunch,” he teases back. You snort and miss the way several of your friends watch the interaction because they know how you are about weird pet names.
“Try again, sweetheart,” you answer.
“Sweetheart, I like the way that sounds,” he says, distracted.
“Just a little longer and we can leave and get something to eat,” you say and he sighs.
“Fine,” he concedes and kisses your cheek, just barely a whisper away from the corner of your mouth.
About half an hour later, you say your goodbyes. Despite your suggestions, Joshua continued drinking instead of switching to water. It’s as fine as it can be, though. He’s just an affectionate drinker. He wraps an arm around you, slipping a hand into your back pocket so that he can whisper thanks again. You do your best to shrug it off and let him drape his arms around your shoulder instead.
The car ride is quiet, initially. You pick a playlist that he made for you after you first met. Something he seems to enjoy. You’re nearly back at his place when he says that he doesn’t have anything to eat. But, luckily, there’s a place around the corner that he loves that’s still open. He manages to place an order on the app, gets something for you as well, and pays before getting there. All you have to do is walk in.
“I hope you’ll come in and eat with me,” he says when you get back into the car.
You’re not really sure how to tell him that you don’t want to. Not because you don’t want to spend time with him. Or that you don’t appreciate him ordering something he knows you’ll like. No, it’s so much deeper than that. It’s that you don’t know if your heart can handle it. You’ve got a couple more weeks of this and your heart is taking a beating. All of this is fake. It’ll be over after the wedding. But, the compliments don’t feel fake. The kisses don’t feel fake. The affection doesn’t feel fake. Your heart racing is real, oh so real. You don’t need anyone to tell you that you’re in way too deep.
None of that comes out, though.
“Sure, sweetheart,” you say and hold your breath for a second. You hadn’t meant to say that when it was just you.
Joshua smiles over at you. “Really do like that.”
Does he know what he’s doing to you? Can he hear your heart hammering in your chest? Can he hear your breath catch? Does he know how insanely beautiful he is? Or that he’s all the more beautiful because he’s so unfailingly kind?
Probably not, because he gets distracted and starts singing along as the song changes. It’s welcome, but also a little devastating. His voice cuts through you in a way you’re still very unprepared to handle.
After another few minutes, you’re at Joshua’s place. He springs back into action and tries to open your door for you, even though you’re the driver. He settles for taking hold of your hand as he walks to his door, only reluctantly dropping it when he gets to the door.
His apartment is familiar to you, it has to be for this to be believable. So, he sets the food out and you grab plates. You grab a couple waters from the fridge while he takes the food over to the couch, bypassing the table. You sit next to him, leaving enough space between you that you’re not touching. Hoping he doesn’t think anything of it.
It’s useless, apparently, because he slides over to press into your side.
What’s worse (not that you thought that was possible) is that he picks things off of your plate and gives you food off his plate. Tries to feed it to you, actually, and pouts when you don’t let him. It takes everything in you not to beg him to be gentle on your heart. He doesn’t even seem to realize what he’s doing to you as he smiles and jokes. Doesn’t seem to think twice about playing with your hands or his hand on your leg or any of the things he usually does when you have an audience. There’s nobody here to see and he’s not usually this touchy when you’re alone. Maybe it’s the drinks.
“I like your friends a lot, you know,” he says out of nowhere.
“They like you, too,” you assure him.
“What about you?” he asks.
“I’d assume they like me as well,” you laugh out.
“No, I meant me. Do you like me?” he asks, eyes big and vulnerable.
Please, Joshua, I’m begging you. Be gentle with me, you think so loud you’re worried he might hear.
“I’m actually a little sick of you,” you joke.
“But, but,” he begins and dramatically throws himself in your lap.
“You’re the worst,” you say without any bite. Your hands find their way into his hair, softly running through the strands.
“That feels nice,” he says softly. “Can I just stay like this? I’m tired.”
“Of course,” you whisper.
“You’ll stay with me?” he asks, sounding like he’s about to drift off.
You’re sure he won’t remember any of this. Not because he’s drunk, but he’s on the edges of sleep. So, you answer in a whisper. “Always.”
Maybe he’s not the one that needs to be careful with your heart. Maybe it’s you that needs to be careful. You know that you could walk away. That you could just remind him that this is all fake and there’s nobody around to see now. That’s not what you do. So, maybe you’re just as much to blame.
Sunday Joshua: thanks for taking care of me last night Joshua: idk why the drinks hit me so hard Joshua: when did you leave? Monday Joshua: is everything okay? Did i say something stupid? Tuesday Joshua: i don’t wanna sound clingy but are we still getting together at your place after work?
Somewhere, in the back of your mind, you know that you need to respond. You know that what you’re doing isn’t fair to anyone. It’s not like Joshua can somehow read your mind to realize you’re spiraling. It just feels a little paralyzing. This is a weird limbo of knowing you might be in over your head, but still believing this is all fake.
Jeonghan: hey dummy i know you’re ignoring joshua so i’m coming over tonight Jeonghan: i told him you’ve been busy at work and i haven’t heard from you either but we have some talking to do
Leave it to Jeonghan. You had almost forgotten, with how well you’ve gotten to know Joshua, that it was Jeonghan who introduced you in the first place. Of course he would text your best friend when he couldn’t get a hold of you. Does that make you feel better? Not really, you think, because it feels like a real relationship in a way. Oh well, you can talk about it with Jeonghan. If he shows up, that is.
And he does, less than an hour later.
“I’m here,” he announces when he comes in the door.
“Thanks for knocking and giving me the chance to pretend I’m not here,” you call back.
“Your car is outside and you have your location turned on,” Jeonghan says.
“Right,” you answer as he comes through the hall holding a bag from your favorite take out place.
“At least I come bearing gifts,” he says.
“You’re an angel, do you know that?” you ask and reach for the bag.
Jeonghan snorts. “I’m gonna remind you of that the next time you call me a demon.”
“Well, Lucifer was a fallen angel,” you reason with a shrug.
“I hate you,” he says.
“I know,” you answer.
Jeonghan busies himself with taking out the food and making sure you have napkins. Tells you what he wants to drink when you get up to go into the kitchen. Calls for you to grab some utensils as well. By the time you sit back down with him, he’s flipping through a streaming service trying to find something to watch. It’s not at all what you’re expecting and you just let it happen. The two of you have been friends long enough to know you should just let things play out.
With some mindless show on in the background, Jeonghan talks about work and your friends and everything else that’s been going on the past few days. Like it’s been weeks since you last saw him. Mostly, he talks about how Taehyung has been blowing up his phone asking for advice about Mimi, which is actually news to you. Sure, you saw him ask her if she wanted to go with him to the wedding. What you had not expected was for him to actually be interested. Which he is, if his messages to Jeonghan are anything to go by. It’s been everything from advice about talking to her to what kinds of things she might like as a surprise. They would probably be cute, you think.
“Yeah, well, sometimes feelings catch us off guard,” Jeonghan says when you admit your surprise.
Damn. Did you really walk right into that?
“True,” you admit, knowing that’s the best answer you can give.
“Talk to me,” Jeonghan urges.
“About what?” you ask to buy more time.
“Joshua,” he says.
“There’s nothing to talk about,” you state. That makes him fix you with a look.
“Clearly there is or you wouldn’t be ignoring him,” he says.
“We’re not really dating so I don’t owe him constant updates. I’m not ignoring him. I just have other shit to do,” you say without looking at him.
“Would you like to be?” he asks. That does make you turn to him.
“Like to be what?” you ask, though you think you know.
“Really dating him,” Jeonghan says.
It’s a crossroads kind of moment. You could say that you don’t want that. That would be a lie, though, and Jeonghan doesn’t like it when you lie. Can always tell the second you say something that’s not true. The truth is that you’ve spent nearly every moment since that stupid night at Hyejin’s place thinking about what you actually feel for your fake boyfriend.
“I don’t…know,” you say slowly and earn a smile because it’s not a lie.
“I was there the other night too, I saw the way it all played out,” he says.
“I mean, does it matter? This is all fake and soon, it’ll be over,” you say.
“Of course it matters and it’ll be over soon? Please,” Jeonghan scoffs. “I know he’s told you that he wants to keep you in his life after Johnny’s wedding. So, what? You’re just gonna be like okay, that was fun, let’s never talk again?”
“I don’t know, maybe,” you say quietly.
He rolls his eyes. “Try again, buttercup.”
“It doesn’t matter. He doesn’t like me like that, he’s just nice,” you say, avoidant as ever.
“He looks at you like he’d give you the moon if you asked for it,” Jeonghan snorts out.
“He’s just nice, Han,” you disagree.
“Maybe,” your closest friend concedes, a rare move for him. It feels weird all the same. “Whatever it is, text him back. He misses you and I don’t want to hear anymore about how he’s worrying he upset you.”
“He’s been worrying that he upset me?” you ask. Your heart constricts at that.
“Yeah, for some reason he actually likes your company,” he says. “Can’t relate.”
You smack Jeonghan on the arm. “Says the man who shows up at my place unannounced when I ignore him for a day.”
“No, I was just bored,” he argued. “And you’re way too stubborn to sort out your shit on your own.”
“I’m not stubborn, but fine, I’ll text him,” you relent.
“Now,” he says.
“What?”
“Text him now so that I know you actually did it.”
You roll your eyes at him, but pull your phone out anyway. Angling it away from Jeonghan so that he can’t see your screen. He’s such a nosy brat sometimes.
You: hey, i’m sorry. It’s been really busy and i had a lot on my mind You: wanna do something tomorrow?
The response comes right away and you ignore the smug look on Jeonghan’s face as you quickly make plans. If Jeonghan was anyone else, he would probably just let you be since he ultimately got what he wanted. But, he’s not anyone else. And he’s as caring to his friends as he is calculating when he wants something. So, he’s not doing it to be cruel, not at all. He just wants you to consider what you’re actually feeling.
You’ll never tell Jeonghan how much you appreciate him talking everything through with you. Never tell him how good it feels to get all the thoughts out of your head. To his credit, he’s not smug and he doesn’t tell you that he’s been right about your feelings all along. He just listens, supports you when you need it, and encourages you to keep thinking through everything that’s going on.
As a make-up for slightly ignoring Joshua (over your own internal freak out), you take him to dinner at your favorite restaurant. It’s this tiny little hole-in-the-wall that people seem to walk past. The kind of place where you couldn’t overspend even if you tried because the couple that owned it just wanted to share good food. The kind of place where they know everyone by name. It makes you feel instantly at ease.
Joshua doesn’t say it, but he also kind of can’t believe you wanted to show him some place that meant so much to you. All he could do was watch, with so much fondness, as you spoke to the couple about everything under the sun. Watch as you turned slightly red when they scolded you for taking so long to bring Joshua by. Smile as you promised the both of you would be back. Despite trying to pay, you beat him to it. Even leaving a massive tip because you insisted the couple had undercharged you. They made a big show of not wanting to take the tip and you only reminded them the cash would stay sitting on the counter. You weren’t taking it back either.
You don’t really think about it when you take a picture of you and Joshua to upload on Instagram. At least, you try not to. Later, when you’re home and winding down for the night, you pull the picture back up. It’s amazing just how happy both of you look. You don’t need to read the comments to know that you’ve never looked so happy in your life. Every part of you wants to pull back again. It’s overwhelming. But, Jeonghan’s voice plays in your head and instead you push past. Make more plans that could break your heart. You have to just trust that he won’t.
It isn’t until the weekend that you’re able to see him again because your schedules didn’t quite match up. That doesn’t stop him from calling you at night, though. Insisting that he wants to know how your day was, even if you can only spare a few minutes for a call. (Which never ends up being the case. You fall asleep on the phone with him twice. His voice is just so soothing when it’s all deep and soft.)
Again, Joshua tells you the date is a surprise. He can be a little bit of a demon, when it suits him. Sure, he likes to pretend he’s not. That he’s above the chaos. Then, he does something like this and he can’t really escape it. But, he’s so sure he knows what you like that he’s positive you’ll enjoy the date. You remember how that chat had gone, too. You were ready to go to sleep, but unable to say goodnight.
(“I have our next date planned,” Joshua says, voice soft to match the calm of the night.
“What is it?” you wonder.
“A surprise,” he answers.
“What if I don’t like it?” you ask back.
“You will,” he assures you.
“You sure seem to think you know me,” you joke.
“Yeah, I do. Don’t worry, you’ll like this too,” he says.
There was no point in denying it. That confidence sent a bit of a shiver through you.)
It turns out that the date is at a winery where you’re painting with wine. You have to ask him to say it again because you’ve only ever heard of wine and paint classes. Painting with wine is entirely new to you. It sounds fun, though, and you know how crafty Joshua can be, have seen all the projects around his apartment. So, even though you’re definitely not that artistic, you’re excited to see this as well.
Admittedly, by the end of the session, your painting isn’t bad. It was a bit weird to use wine in that way, but they let you drink as well. Which makes it a lot easier to just go along with the idea of painting. Joshua’s painting, on the other hand, is beautiful. Not for the first time, you think his talents might be wasted at an office job. You’ve seen the bracelets he makes and now you’ve seen him paint. You’ve heard him sing and play the guitar. He’s impossibly artistic in a way that should make you jealous. Instead, it just makes you more endeared to him.
You snap a picture of him and his art when he’s not looking and upload it before he can even realize it. It’s only when a notification goes off on his phone that he realizes. He doesn’t even say anything, just gets a sparkle in his eyes that makes you weary immediately. He’s busy tapping away on his own phone before a notification sounds on yours. Maybe you weren’t the only one to steal a candid shot if the picture of you laughing with a glass of wine in one hand and a paintbrush in the other is anything to go by. It’s the caption that really ruins you, though. Just a simple “think I’m addicted to her light”. It’s so simple and also so much sweeter than yours. You fight through the urge to run away.
Which lasts until you get home from dinner. It was the perfect date, truly. Joshua always seems to know exactly how to plan out a day so everything works. After sipping wine and painting, he took you to one of his favorite restaurants. Nothing too pretentious, just kind of unassuming. The kind of place where you get good food and even better conversation. It’s (mostly) easy to keep your mind off the way your heart keeps racing.
When you’re back home, you’re not so lucky.
Back home, alone in your apartment, there aren’t any distractions. Nothing to stop your mind from all the ways that it can sabotage your own happiness. Nothing to stop you from thinking about how nobody, not even Johnny, has ever planned out such thoughtful dates for you. Nobody has ever taken the time to really know you like Joshua. Even if you won’t admit it, he knows you better than anyone you’ve ever dated. Which is terrifying, since this is all fake. And he hasn’t even known you that long.
So, you do the rational thing and you pull back again. Answer his texts so that he doesn’t send Jeonghan over to figure out what’s wrong, but don’t make solid plans. Talk a lot about a work project that you really need to get done ahead of schedule so that you’re not stressing leading up to the wedding. And you throw in some easy suggestions in the meantime so that it still seems like you’re making an effort.
Lunch on a work day so that it has a set ending time. Which still tugs at your heartstrings a bit because he takes a longer lunch just to meet you closer to where you work.
An event where your parents purchased a table for charity because he’s in high demand with your family around. And he can’t be as affectionate.
His Open Mic Nights, but with the excuse that you can’t stay too late because of your project and he should stick around with his friends. You’ll get home safely.
Small little things that keep you around him and keep up your conversations while still giving you time to breathe. You’re sure that you’re pulling it all off. And then, the wedding is around the corner. The finish line is in sight.
You: I’m not going to the wedding You: you don’t have to come pick me up Joshua: what are you talking about? You: i’m not going Joshua: but it’s literally in a few hours? You: yeah and i don’t wanna go, so you’re off the hook You: thanks for everything, but you don’t have to pretend anymore
Even if you know you’re being a little petulant, you don’t really care. This whole thing was supposed to be about protecting your heart. Protecting your pride. Not showing up to your cheating ex-fiance's wedding alone and looking like some kind of loser. It was not supposed to be about your heart getting clobbered anyway. So, you’re doing the only logical thing you can think of. Ignoring your problems. Avoiding both the wedding and Joshua. What you’re not prepared for, though you should be, is the knock that comes at your door half an hour later.
Joshua is on the other side of the door and your heart actually stops. He’s got his tux on and his hair styled back off his face. His eyes are soft as they take you in, noting that you have your hair and make up done. Though, you’re still in your sweats. You got at least that far before you decided this was a stupid fucking decision.
“Can I come in?” he asks when you don’t say anything.
“Sure,” you say and step aside.
“You look like you’re getting ready,” he comments once he’s inside.
“I was, until I texted you,” you answer. “Speaking of, why are you here?”
“Because we had plans,” he says.
“Yeah to go see my ex-fiance marry the girl he cheated on me with. Oh, and for you to pretend to be my boyfriend so I didn’t look pathetic,” you say with a huff.
“You’re not pathetic. He’s an asshole,” Joshua says. He doesn’t swear often, so it catches you a little off guard.
“Well, whatever, you don’t have to go. So, I’m not really sure why you’re here,” you say.
“You’re being so cold. What’s going on?” Joshua asks and reaches out to you. Instead, you duck away from his touch.
“Nothing is going on. It was stupid to care what Johnny thought or to try and save face somehow,” you say.
“It’s not stupid. He hurt you and you didn’t deserve that,” Joshua urges.
“You really don’t know me that well. Maybe I did deserve it. Maybe I was awful to him and he had no choice,” you say.
“We both know that’s not true,” he says.
“Do we?” you challenge.
“Yes, we do,” he presses. “There is nothing you could do that justifies cheating instead of just breaking it off. But, I also know you didn’t do anything wrong. Jeonghan and I talked about it.”
“You spoke to Jeonghan about my relationship behind my back?” you question.
“What is going on? We’ve been hanging out for weeks and getting to know each other. I just wanted to know more about someone I was going to be helping. And I like knowing you,” Joshua says and you have to look away. You don’t need the reminder of how much time you’ve spent with him.
“Yeah, sorry about all that time we wasted. I’ll pay you back for the tux or anything else you had to buy to pretend to date me,” you say and he looks genuinely confused.
“I don’t…want you to pay me back for anything. It wasn’t a waste of time. I did this because I wanted to,” he says.
“Yeah, well, you don’t have to pretend anymore because I’m not going to the stupid fucking wedding. It was a really bad idea in the first place,” you say.
Joshua clenches his jaw and looks away. Like maybe he’s frustrated. “What is going on? Do you still have feelings for him?”
“For who? Johnny?” you ask, so insanely caught off guard that you forget you’re mad.
“Yes,” Joshua says tightly.
“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” you bark out.
“Well? You’re being really weird and now you don’t want to go to a wedding that we’ve been planning on,” he starts.
“Yeah, which should make you happy, since you don’t have to pretend to be my boyfriend anymore,” you say.
“Because you’re still in love with Johnny,” Joshua finishes like he hadn’t even heard you.
“Oh my god,” you nearly scream. “I’m not fucking in love with Johnny. This isn’t about him.”
“So, you don’t want to go to the wedding and it has nothing to do with him? That doesn’t make any sense,” he says.
“No, I don’t want to keep doing this,” you say, gesturing between the two of you. “I don’t want to keep pretending to date you when I -”
You clamp your mouth shut. Unable to believe that you almost blurted out how you feel.
“When you what?” he challenges. “What? Is it that bad being around me? Is that it? Are you just sick of me? Ready to toss me aside?”
You laugh bitterly, not even able to appreciate the irony in the situation. “No, Joshua, I don’t want to toss you aside.”
“Then, what? What am I supposed to think when you’ve been pushing me away for the last couple weeks? And I have to act like I haven’t noticed all the ways you’ve kept me at arm’s length since we went to the winery. Why did you just decide, literally today, that you don’t want to go to the wedding after all?” he asks, rambling. He’s pacing in front of you. “Why are you trying so hard to get rid of me?”
“Because I don’t want to get hurt!” you blurt out. “Because I don’t want to go to my fucking scumbag of an ex’s wedding where everyone is going to be giving me these looks of pity or focusing on my relationship with him when all I want is this.”
“This? What?” he asks, coming to a stop.
“This, Joshua, you and me. Having this just all be pretend is breaking my heart. I can’t keep doing it. It was supposed to keep me from getting my heart broken. It sucks and I hate it and I just wish it wasn’t pretend. I don’t want to go to the wedding and have you be so sweet and kind and caring when I’m going to know it has an expiration date. That it’s all just been for show,” you admit. You turn away, clutching your arms around your center because you’re so tired. And so exposed. So vulnerable. It’s awful.
The tears won’t stop, so you don’t notice how Joshua has closed the space between you until he wraps his arms around you from behind. Pulls you back against his chest and presses a kiss into your hair.
“So, let’s stop saying it’s pretend,” he whispers.
“What?” you whisper back.
He turns you in his arms so that you’re facing him and gently brushes away the tears. “Let’s stop saying it’s fake. It doesn’t feel fake, does it?”
“No,” is all you can manage.
“So, it’s not fake and we’re not pretending,” he says.
“But,” you start to protest.
“I knew I was in trouble, really deep trouble, as soon as we left your parents’ house. I was just waiting for you to catch up,” he says as he gently runs a thumb across your cheek to wipe away a tear . Your eyes go wide.
“That was barely a week in,” you say and he just shrugs. “And I’d dumped all my bullshit on you.”
“I think that’s actually what made me like you so much,” he says. “It was supposed to be fake and we were trying to get to know each other well enough to pull it off. But, instead, I just realized you were actually perfect.”
“Perfect? I was broken,” you joke and he shakes his head.
“No, you’ve been hurt. Who hasn’t? You’re also strong, kind, funny, a fiercely loyal friend, and one of the most beautiful people I’ve ever met, inside and out,” he says.
“That’s so, you’re so sweet,” you say and try to hide your face. He doesn’t let you. “You like me?”
“I’ve liked you the whole time. I did think it was a date, after all,” he says. “And do you think I’m that affectionate with everyone?”
“We were pretending,” you argue.
“I wasn’t,” he argues back.
“Our closest friends thought you were,” you disagree.
“And was anyone else there in my apartment when I was still being affectionate?” he asks.
“Well, no, but…” you start.
“I heard you say always,” he tells you.
“You did?” you ask, sure that it’s been your secret this whole time.
“We don’t have to go to the wedding. But, if it’s just because you don’t want this to be over with me, then it’s not going to be over. I’m yours for as long as you want me,” he says so earnestly it nearly makes you blush.
“Careful, you might get sick of me,” you joke.
He puts a finger under your chin so he can look you in the eyes. “I’ll say it again. I’m yours as long as you want me. I won’t get sick of you.”
“I…” you start and don’t know where to go. So you do the only thing you can think of and kiss him. It’s clear he’s a little caught off guard, but he recovers quickly. His arms wrap around you to hold you tight against him. It’s the first time you’ve really kissed him and you’re so screwed because he really is perfect at this too.
“So, do I get you for the rest of today?” he asks.
You take in his tuxedo again, for real this time. Appreciating how well it’s tailored and how amazing he looks. With a sigh, you say, “you know, it’s a shame to waste such a nice tux.”
“Are you…I thought we weren’t going,” he stutters.
“I’m probably gonna have to fix my makeup in the car, but why not? I want to show off my super hot and very real boyfriend,” you say and watch him choke on air.
“You can’t just say…” he starts.
“Damn, sick of me already?” you tease.
“You know I’m not,” he answers and moves to follow you.
“No, no. You don’t get to see me changing. I’ll be back out in a second,” you say.
You’re in the middle of shimmying into your dress when you realize that you do still have a lot to talk about. A lot to figure out. This whole situation has been unusual, though, so it probably makes sense that there isn’t a template. Once you have your shoes on, you walk back into the living room, prepared to say something, only to find Joshua speechless.
“You look…” he starts.
“You’ve seen the dress already,” you say and smile.
“Not on you. Not in person. You look amazing,” he says and crosses to pull you into his arms. “Are you sure we have to go?”
“Yes,” you say and swat him. “But, I do know we have a lot to talk about.”
“I’m not in a rush,” he says and allows you to step away.
“We might need to be in a bit of a rush,” you say, checking the time and gathering all your things.
“Let’s go, then,” Joshua says and offers his arm.
The wedding passes in kind of a blur. In truth, you barely even register Johnny or what he’s doing beyond the actual ceremony. The reception is so massive that it’s easiest just to focus on the people around you. Especially when you’re at a table with your friends. Thankfully, you’re not at a table with your parents or your sister. It does mean, though, that you’re sitting next to Hyejin, who has definitely realized that something shifted between you and Joshua. So, she’s trying to sneak in a question any time she can. Which is hard, given that Joshua is more attached to you than ever. And Hyejin doesn’t want to draw unnecessary attention to you. All you manage to let her know is that it’s real now and that you’ll fill her in after the wedding. (You’re also thankful that people seem to be cooing over Taehyung and Mimi since they’re the shiny new topic.)
It’s also nice to have Joshua there because he’s a built in way to excuse yourself from any conversation that you don’t want to be part of. It’s easy to just say you’re going to go back to the table. Or, in the case of a good song coming on, he’ll be quick to drag you to the dance floor and away from whatever conversation you’re stuck in. He’s a good dancer, too. You don’t miss the way Hyejin catches your eye when the first slow song comes on and he pulls you close to him. But, that’s a conversation for another day. All you wanted was to appreciate the way his hand felt on your lower back or your hand felt in his.
When it was finally time to leave, Joshua led you out of the event, arm around you to guide you. Neither of you were drunk, but you had still hired someone to take you to and from the wedding anyway. A gift from your parents to appreciate you “doing the right thing” and coming to the wedding. For the sake of the families. It made you roll your eyes at the time, yet you’re thankful now. It would be far better than having to take an Uber or trying to get a room at the hotel (and risking seeing everyone else staying there the next morning). The ride home also gave you the chance to talk. Really talk. Neither of you cared much that someone else was driving (and he had the partition up, anyway), as you talked about your feelings honestly for the first time.
As it turned out, you had a lot to say. Both of you. You hadn’t been nearly as good at hiding your feelings from Joshua as you had been at hiding them from yourself. He had hoped you were going to admit them to him after that night at his apartment. Instead, you avoided him. Yes, he knew that you had been avoiding him. You also weren’t very good at picking up on the signs he dropped about his feelings for you. He admitted that he could have just said something, but he was trying to be subtle so he didn’t scare you off. Trying to let his actions speak through more affection. You admit you were scared to think it was anything more than it actually was. Scared of your feelings. Scared of getting hurt again. Joshua completely understands that and admits that he’s a little scared, too, because you’re definitely more important to him than he was anticipating. He’s also confident that you can work through it together. It gives you a feeling of hope. Makes everything about you feel lighter. You see that relief reflected in Joshua’s eyes when they scan yours.
The car pulls to a stop and he gets out first. He holds his hand out to help you out of the car. You’re not really sure what comes over you.
“Come up with me,” you ask, but it’s more of a statement.
He hesitates, conflicted. “I don’t know if I should.”
“Why?” you ask, clearly confused.
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to leave,” he answers and you smile.
“Then stay,” you shrug, “at least for breakfast.”
Without waiting for him to respond, you turn and head for the front door of the building. It means you miss the way he freezes in place, but you can guess at that by how long it takes before he catches up to you. He’s unusually quiet and still beside you as you go up the elevator and then behind you as you unlock the door.
“I’m gonna go change,” you announce after you drop your keys by the door. You look back at Joshua, appreciating him in the tuxedo one last time. “I’ve got some clothes in the spare room that should fit. They’re Jeonghan’s ”
You take the opportunity to breathe for a second, to let it settle in that you asked Joshua to come in with you and stay the night. Then, you set about changing out of your dress. Carefully clean your face free of the make-up. Brush through your hair and twist it back off of your face. Once you’re in comfy clothes and bare faced, you head back out into the living room. It’s odd that you don’t even feel self-conscious about Joshua seeing you like this, you’re instantly comfortable.
Joshua’s back is to you in the kitchen. When he turns around, you see that he’s put together a little platter of snacks. You also were right, the t-shirt and shorts he picked out seem to fit him well. Jeonghan is a little slighter than Joshua, but he wears most of his clothes on the baggier side.
“Thanks for the clothes,” he says when you both meet on the couch. “I was worried when you said you had spare clothes they were gonna be from an ex or Johnny or something.”
Your laugh is sudden and clearly catches Joshua off guard. “I wouldn’t have kept any of Johnny’s clothes. I gave them all to charity.”
“I’m sure he was thrilled with that,” Joshua laughs.
“They made a killing reselling them,” you laugh in response. “Wanna watch something?”
“Sure, you pick,” he says.
You start clicking through your saved list to find something that the two of you can watch. Once you settle on something, Joshua motions you over. Even if you want to pretend you’re considering it, you can’t. Every part of you wants to be close to him. When you slide over, he pulls you in tighter to his body and you fit like you always belonged there with him.
If you thought he was physically affectionate when he was pretending, it’s nothing compared to now that he knows you’re both in this. He has one hand running along your arm or the other along your thigh. Sometimes he reaches out to take one of your hands. Other times he presses kisses into your hair. It’s pretty clear right away that he’s not paying much attention to the show.
If you’re being honest, you’re not really either.
Everything is distracting. The way his fingers on the bare skin of your arm raises goosebumps. The way his kiss in your hair makes your eyes close in appreciation. The way he squeezes your thigh and short circuits your brain.
You can’t help it. You turn your head so that you can look at him. He caresses your cheek, so gentle. Runs his thumb across your lip. You’re holding your breath, just waiting to see what he’s going to do. When you feel like you’re going to go a little bit insane, his hand moves to the back of your neck and pulls you in. It’s exactly like the first kiss before the wedding. At least, at first. It’s gentle, but full of so much desire. It’s also slow, like there’s no rush to any of it.
The position is really uncomfortable, though. You shift your legs so they’re draped over one of Joshua’s. He doesn’t miss a beat. It just allows him to pull you closer. There’s something incredibly intimate in kissing him like this. There’s this weird contrast of desire and comfort. It’s heated, but also a little lazy. Like you have all the time in the world. Which you do, you think, now that you’re being honest about your feelings. When Joshua pulls back from the kiss, you chase his lips for a second before realizing that he’s pulled away. The way he looks at you nearly melts you into the couch.
“I don’t want to assume where this is headed, but maybe we should take it to the bedroom?” he asks. It’s cute, the way he’s a little shy. Like you didn’t invite him in to spend the night. Yeah, you’re in way over your head. At least it seems like he might be too.
You pull your legs back so that you can stand up. His eyes track your movements as you reach your hand back to him. He accepts it without a word and lets you lead him to the bedroom. Even if he’s seen your bedroom before, this feels different. You’re waiting for him to look around, but his eyes are glued on you. Joshua even waits for you to lead him all the way to the bed, so you direct him to sit on the edge.
Once Joshua is seated, you step between his legs and tilt your head down to kiss him. He wraps his arms around you so that he can pull you against him. There’s barely any space between you. It sends a little bit of a shiver as his hands run up your back and back down. The touch is gentle and caring. Like he’s trying to put everything he feels into it. Something about it just makes you feel so insanely safe.
He’s the one to break the kiss again, but this time it’s to move back onto the bed and grab your hand to pull you along with him. It’s easy to just follow suit and get comfortable laying next to him, bodies facing each other. The kissing picks up when your lips meet again. Joshua kisses you breathless with a passion you’re eager to explore. One of his hands rests on your hip, casually sliding beneath your shirt and caressing up your side. You press your body further into his and capture his moan with a kiss. It feels like you’re a bit drunk off each other.
When Joshua’s hand moves back down, you take the chance to throw your leg over his hip, allowing you to press further into him and feel how this is turning him on. Part of you knows that he’s still waiting for you to set the pace. Or that he wants things to be a little slower. So, you help him out and roll the two of you over so that you’re straddled on top of him. Putting his hands on your hips, you lean over to kiss him again. In this position, you can also grind into his lap. You delight in how he’s already getting hard beneath you, enjoy the way his hands grip the soft flesh of your hips.
He pulls back and looks at you with blown pupils. “Baby, please don’t tease me.”
“No silly pet name?” you tease him.
“Not when you’re getting me this turned on like a horny teenager,” he whines.
“You mean like this?” you ask, injecting as much innocence as you can when you slowly drag your clothed pussy across his dick again.
Joshua throws his head back, eyes squeezed shut, and grips you tighter. “Yes.”
“So you don’t like it?” you ask, grinding a little more.
“Fuck,” he hisses out. And somehow that’s the thing that almost breaks you. Why is that one swear so hot on his lips?
Without saying anything, you sit up a little bit, still making sure you’re straddling Joshua, so that you can pull his shirt off him. Your eyes go wide because you’ve never seen him shirtless. You’ve seen him in well fitted suits or shirts, but this is entirely different. His chest looks like it was sculpted by an artist. All your attention is on your fingers running along his chest and you don’t see the way it makes him a little shy.
His hands reach for your own shirt, playing with the hem like he’s asking permission. So, you move his hands aside and pull it over your head, leaving your skin bare as well. You watch him drink you in, feeling almost empowered by the desire you see in his eyes. He pulls you back towards him so that he can get one of your breasts into his mouth. The way he teases your nipple with his tongue has you clenching around nothing. You can feel how wet it’s making you and try your best not to squirm when he moves from one breast to the other.
“I need you,” you utter.
“I need you, too,” he says against your skin. His hips buck up into you almost involuntarily.
You slide off of him and pull your shorts down and he gasps that you don’t have any underwear on. It isn’t like you were expecting anything, you just wanted to be prepared. While he’s still a little drunk on the sight of you fully naked, you help him discard the rest of his clothing. The sight of his cock springing free, precum leaking out, has you wanting to get your mouth on him.
But, you’re realizing, what you really want is to feel him inside you. After so much tension and wondering, you just want to have this moment together. You want to be as close as two people can possibly get. You want all the intimacy and to be able to see his face. It’s this thought that pushes you back to the bed to lay with him.
Joshua repositions and runs a hand down your body. Lets his fingers run along your thighs and tease their way up to gather some of your wetness. Your eyes close as he runs a finger up your slit. It’s such a little amount of contact and it makes you moan anyway.
“Damn, are you this wet just for me?” he asks and presses a kiss into the first bit of your skin he can reach.
“I want to feel you,” you admit. Joshua makes you press a finger into your pussy, but you stop him. Confusion takes over his features.
“I thought…do you not want this?” he asks.
“I do, but I want…I want all of you,” you admit. “I want to feel you deep inside of me. I want to be completely ruined by you. I want to come together.”
“Shit,” he hisses, hand stilling against your body. “On one condition.”
“What’s that?” you ask.
“I want to taste you soon,” he says, pressing a kiss into your shoulder.
The thought of him between your legs makes you shiver. It’s almost enough to forget that you want this first time to be together. “Deal.”
“Do you have condoms? I wasn’t exactly expecting…” he says, trailing off.
“That drawer,” you say and point.
He rolls himself off of the bed to open the drawer. You’re not sure why you expect his hands to be a little unsteady when he rips open the wrapper and rolls it onto himself, but he’s so calm. Maybe it’s just you that’s a little nervous. At least, that’s what you think until you catch the look on his face. It has to be the same as yours, naked want mixed with a little bit of uncertainty. Everything else has been so easy with you, what if this is where it goes wrong?
“Just lay back,” he urges you, voice calming any lingering nerves. His voice drops to a whisper, like the next statement is just for him. “You’re so beautiful, every single inch of you.”
It makes your heart constrict in a way that you’re not really prepared for. It would be nice if your feelings could stop flooding in all at once like a dam breaking. It’s overwhelming. You do as he says, though, and lean back against the pillow. Joshua gently spreads your legs apart and takes another moment to appreciate you. He can’t seem to help himself from running a finger along your entrance.
Even though he would fully be within his rights to tease you, he doesn’t. He lines himself up at your entrance and looks to you for final confirmation. All you can manage is a nod. You know he wants to hear you, but you can’t bring yourself to form the words. So, he accepts the nods and slowly presses into you.
“Fuck,” you hiss as you adjust to him.
“Are you okay?” he worries.
“Feels good,” you say with a slight whine. “It’s just been a bit.”
He presses the rest of the way into you and then stills so you can get used to him. It’s really overwhelming. Not just because you’re finally feeling him inside of you. More so because he’s looking at you with more adoration than you’ve ever felt in your life. Like this is it for him. Like you’re it for him. It’s too early to be thinking of love, but you really don’t know if anyone has ever loved you so completely. You think he’s probably it for you too.
Once he finally starts to move, you know it’s going to be over entirely too fast. He starts with slow thrusts, testing what you want. You dig your fingers into his arms as a way to ground yourself. To anchor yourself to him and in the moment. When he picks up the pace, your mind goes entirely blank. It’s just the right speed. While you love the hard and fast fucking, there’s something so much more intimate about this kind of in between speed.
“God you feel so good,” he whines as he snaps into you again. “So tight and perfect.”
“You’re so - oh my god,” you moan out, unable to finish the sentence as he hits you just right.
Joshua moves one of your legs so that it’s over his shoulder and presses further into you, hitting deeper than you were prepared for.
“Fuck, Joshua, holy shit,” you scream out.
“Love the sound of my name on your lips,” he manages as his thrusts pick up pace.
You want to respond that you love saying it, want to say anything, but the thrusts are entirely too much. As if it wasn’t already too much, Joshua adjusts again so that he can press his thumb against your clit. He rubs circles in time with his thrusts and you think that you might see stars. You throw your head back, eyes pressed shut.
“Look at me, baby. I wanna see you when you come,” he urges, his own voice sounding ragged.
Despite wanting to focus on the pressure building between you, you do as he asks. Your eyes meet his and it’s that look that makes that coil snap. You’re coming hard and digging your fingers into whatever you can find to release some of the tension in your body. This might be the best orgasm you’ve had.
When you come back to this plane, Joshua has stilled inside of you. One of his hands gently caresses your face as he mumbles quiet praises. It’s so impossibly tender.
“It’s okay, sweetheart, you can move,” you assure him.
“Thank fuck,” he mumbles.
His pace now picks up to something fast and hard with one of his large hands anchoring your thigh to his body. Your hands grip any part of his body that they can reach and you relish the way he hisses when your nails drag patterns down his skin. Marking him so that he belongs to you. Just as you belong so completely to him.
It seems impossible but you can feel the tension building low in your stomach again. His thrusts are so hard that you feel like his cock might split you open and something about it just works for you. You hadn’t thought anything about him would translate to this kind of hard and fast sex, but it’s somehow better than you could have imagined. With him so focused on chasing his own high, you rub circles on your clit to bring yourself over the edge again. You tumble over the edge for a second time just as Joshua’s thrusts get erratic. You do your best to take over the rhythm before slowing down.
Joshua collapses on top of you, cock still buried in your pussy, and sighs. His weight on top of you feels like the best security you’ve ever had. Your hands find their way into his hair, gently stroking and scratching his scalp. As he comes back around, he presses his head further into your hand.
“Hey,” you say when he looks up at you.
“You’re perfect,” he responds and you can’t keep the smile off your face.
“You were pretty perfect yourself,” you say.
“Am I too heavy, I could…” he starts and you pull him tighter against you.
“Don’t you dare,” you warn.
He doesn’t say anything, just nuzzles his face into your neck. But, you know that you can’t stay like this forever. So you don’t protest when he gently pulls himself up and gets out of the bed. You’re right behind him, leading him into the bathroom so that you can get both of you cleaned up.
After getting cleaned up, dressed, and doing your respective night time routines, you and Joshua are settled back into your bed (on top of a fresh set of sheets). Although you’ve never been much for falling asleep cuddling, you can’t imagine leaving any space between you and him. When he wraps himself around you, all you can do is smile and settle deeper into his perfect chest. Honestly, every inch of this man is perfect and you’d be annoyed if you weren’t so helplessly attached to him.
And it’s the best sleep you’ve gotten in a long time. You wake up with his chest pressed into your back and his arm still wrapped around you. It sounds like he’s still asleep based on his breathing and so you’re just considering slipping out of the bed. He moves in his sleep and pulls you tighter against him, making you feel that he’s semi-hard again. You press back against him, almost testing if he’s really asleep.
He’s not.
Joshua’s hand, already against the skin of your stomach and underneath your shirt, moves further up to your breast. His hand squeezes your breast and then he brushes his thumb over your nipple. Your body responds to his touch embarrassingly fast, which only seems to spur him on. He’s got your nipple between his fingers before you press back into him again, wiggling your ass against his dick without pretending you’re doing otherwise.
“Good morning beautiful,” Joshua says in a raspy voice into your ear.
The warmth of his breath along with the pressure of him rolling your nipple between his thumb and forefinger has you suppressing a moan. In the quiet of the morning, he hears it anyway. He removes his hand from your breast and you want to pout at the loss of contact. That is, until his hand works down between your legs, roughly grabbing hold of your pussy through your shorts. He runs his middle finger through your folds, likely feeling the way your shorts are getting soaked through already.
“Feels like someone might have woken up ready,” he says into your ear, voice sinfully low. His finger is still slowly teasing you through the damn material of your shorts. Somehow that makes it feel hotter.
“I wonder why,” you retort, undermined by the way you squirm under his touch.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asks and stops his movements.
Your hand immediately moves to his. To guide him back to your cunt. “Please don’t. Want to see what those hands can do.”
His mouth is still by your ear, so you hear the dark chuckle and feel the air tickle you. He moves your hand aside along with your shorts as he slips his hand inside the fabric. His middle finger resumes the previous pattern almost lazily. You’re about to ask him to stop teasing you when he presses a finger inside you suddenly.
“Fuck,” you nearly scream.
“Is someone a little sensitive?” he teases. He’s a fucking demon and you would gladly sell your soul so he didn’t stop.
The way he pumps his finger inside of you is entirely too slow. But, when you try to meet his rhythm, he stops. Just when you think you might actually die, he inserts a second finger. It makes your back arch, pressing your ass further against his now very hard cock. He hisses and pulls his fingers out from you. As you’re turning over to adjust your position, you see him insert his fingers into his mouth. Holy shit. He really is the hottest man you’ve ever met.
Instead of letting you carry on in any way, he pushes himself up and repositions. You’re not really sure what he’s doing until he reaches for your shorts to pull them off. His focus is on you, silently asking for permission again. All you can do is nod.
“Told you that I wanted to taste you,” he reminds you once your shorts are off.
“Are you sure…” you start to ask before he cuts you off.
His head snaps up so he can meet your eyes. “I’ve been waiting to taste you for weeks.”
That shuts you up pretty effectively. What can you really say in response to that? Anything you might have said dies in your throat as he licks a messy stripe up your folds. He quickly settles, using one hand to keep you spread open for him, and licks into you. It’s all you can do to keep your eyes on him as his head bobs between your legs. You thread your fingers through his hair to keep him in place even though you know he’s not going anywhere. (And okay, maybe it’s more to ground yourself to him than anything else.)
It shouldn’t be surprising that his attentiveness translates this well, but it is a little surprising how well he seems to know your body. The way he knows just when to switch from licking into your cunt to flicking his tongue over your clit. The way he knows when he needs to add a finger and then a second. The way he can tell everything your body needs before you even realize it.
By the time he pulls himself up your body, he’s got you nearly panting from the build up. The kiss he presses to your lips is sloppy and a little desperate. Like you’re both totally fucked out. His fingers inside you keep a relentless pace as he hooks them, hitting that perfect spot.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you yell out, breaking the kiss. Your whole body feels like it’s on fire in an entirely different way from the night before.
There’s nothing in the world but Joshua and the way he coaxes everything out of you. The way he has you squirting on his fingers. You’re not even sure if the praise coming out of your mouth makes any sense and you’re definitely not sure what he says in return. It’s all you can do just to appreciate the moment.
You think that you’re going to get the chance to get your mouth around his cock now that he’s given you another mind blowing orgasm. But, by the time you get your breathing under control, you see that he’s rolling a condom from your drawer onto himself. He pulls you to the edge of the bed so that your legs are hanging off. It’s instantly stronger than you’re expecting from him and pulls a gasp from you.
Without even thinking, your legs fall open. Joshua seems to have found a bottle of lube, too, and spreads it over his cock. When he lines himself up at your entrance, you expect him to ease in like the night before. He doesn’t. He snaps his full length inside of you in one motion and you’re so overstimulated, but it feels so good.
“Fuck me, Joshua, oh my fucking god,” you say and clench down around his dick.
“Shit, that feels so good,” he hisses.
“You feel so good,” you moan.
“You have no idea,” he answers and starts thrusting.
It’s a complete haze from the moment you hear his skin slap against your own. Every coherent thought leaves your head. There is nothing in the world but you and him and the way you make each other feel. He leans over your body, crowds your space. Steals sloppy, desperate kisses. Praises you constantly and in broken sentences. It’s all you can do just to hold on, so sore and so unable to stop.
Your hands grip into the sheets around you that are completely rumpled. You try everything to keep your eyes on Joshua’s face. Memorize the way he looks when he’s concentrating. Appreciate how totally gone he is because you’re sure it’s the same look you have. Delight in the way his eyes get even wider when you clench your pussy around him.
It feels a little like he’s using your body to chase his own high, except there’s total comfort in that. All you want is for him to feel as good as you do. All you want is for him to get that release, especially since you haven’t been able to get your mouth on his cock yet.
“Harder Joshua, please. I know you’re close,” you beg and he obliges immediately.
Even though you’re trying to meet the rhythm, you can’t. It’s too erratic and too unpredictable. So you pull him down to you again and kiss him. Slip your tongue inside his mouth and let the kisses get as sloppy as they need to. You feel how close he is and only kiss him harder. He breaks the kiss for the last few thrusts, groaning as he comes. You’re right there with him.
(Later, he tells you that he’s never seen anyone hotter than you when you come. It would make you embarrassed in any other situation. But, you realize that you’ve never been with anyone that’s come close to him, so maybe it’s okay to accept his praise. Maybe you deserve it. Maybe this is the person that you’ve been waiting for.)
Now, you really do have to get up and clean up. As tempting as Joshua’s offer to shower together is, you don’t want it to turn into shower sex because that’s just not sexy (or practical). Neither one of you can seem to guarantee keeping their hands off the other. Instead, you tell him that he can use the shower in your guest room. It’s fully stocked and there are still more spare clothes in there. He insists that he should get some laundry going because you must be running out of clean sheets and you definitely made a mess.
With Joshua cleaning up some around the house, you’re the first out of the shower and dressed. Pleasantly sore in the kind of way you really enjoy. You’re sitting on the couch and scrolling through your phone, trying to decide if you want to order food or just cook what you already have. Before you can make a decision, there’s a knock at the door. It’s impossible to guess who it could be. Even Jeonghan wouldn’t bother you like this. Although he’s been texting asking for an update after you told him you finally got your shit together, he wouldn’t show up like this.
When you open the door, you’d give anything for it to just be Jeonghan. Instead, you see a face that you’ve been seeing entirely too much lately.
“What are you doing here, Johnny?” you ask with a heavy sigh.
“I need to talk to you,” he says.
“Why?” you ask.
“Come on, don’t be like that,” he pleads.
“Johnny, it’s the day after your wedding. What the fuck are you doing on my doorstep?” you ask, arms crossed.
“Are you really going to make me do this in the hallway?” he asks.
“I don’t see any reason to invite you inside,” you retort.
“It’s about your, uh, boyfriend,” Johnny says a little awkwardly.
“Joshua?” you ask because that actually piques your interest a bit.
“Can I come in?” he asks.
“No. What about Joshua?” you ask.
“This is really awkward. It would be better if we were sitting down…” Johnny starts.
“My little honeybun, is everything okay?” Joshua asks from inside the apartment. He must be out of the shower.
“Babe, we talked about the pet names,” you remind him as he joins you at the door.
“Oh, uh, I wasn’t expecting him to be here,” Johnny says.
“I’m her boyfriend, so I know why I’m here. What are you doing here?” Joshua says without hiding any disdain. "Are you really her boyfriend, though?" Johnny challenges. You stiffen almost imperceptibly, but Joshua must notice it because he wraps an arm around you protectively. "Of course I am. Why are you here?"
“I needed to talk to her,” Johnny says stiffly.
“About you, apparently,” you say with your eyes on Joshua.
“Right, so can you give us a minute?” Johnny asks with his eyes on Joshua.
“No, he can’t. If you have something to say, just say it. Then you can leave us alone,” you say.
“Fine, if you really want it to be like this, fine,” Johnny says. “I knew he looked familiar when I saw him at your parents’ house with you. It just took me a while. I ran into him at a couple of functions back when I was in college and traveling all around for my dad.”
“Okay? And? I’m sorry, but I’m not sure why I care,” you say even though you know where he’s going.
“He was always with older women,” Johnny presses.
“Can you just make your point so we can get back to our day?” Joshua asks.
“Fine,” Johnny says, irritated. “The whispers were that women paid him to come to the events with them. That he was selling himself to them.”
You actually snort at the phrasing. It takes you several seconds to compose yourself. You wonder what the point of Johnny doing this and if it’s his way of trying to keep you on the hook. Then you realize that you don’t really care what he does. For the first time in forever, you’re genuinely happy.
“I’m glad you think this is funny,” Johnny says.
“Not that it’s any of your business, but I know how Joshua helped pay for his education. And like why am I going to give him a hard time over seizing an opportunity? There’s nothing wrong with profiting off of someone wanting his company platonically,” you say.
“You’re assuming he wasn’t also sleeping with them,” Johnny says, a little stubborn.
“No, I’m not assuming. I know he wasn’t because we’ve talked about this. He told me all about it without even being prompted. And unlike certain people in my life, I have absolutely no reason to doubt him. I know I can actually trust him,” you say. “It was also years before we met. We’ve all got history.”
“Nice dig,” he says.
“It’s not a dig, Johnny. Not everything is a slight,” you say with a sigh. “Where does Gabby think you are?”
“What?” Johnny asks.
“Your wife,” you clarify. “Where does she think you are?”
“Oh, well, that’s not important. I just said I had some errands to take care of,” Johnny says and you roll your eyes.
“We’re done, Johnny,” you say.
“Wait,” he says as you’re moving to shut the door. “I know I fucked up, but…”
“There’s no buts. Not anymore,” you say. “Maybe there was a point where I’d want to hear the buts and the apologies and all that. I’m happy now, though, and you can’t even tell your wife that you came to see your ex-fiancee the day after your wedding.”
“It’s not like…” he starts and you start to close the door at the same time.
“It’s exactly like that. Goodbye, Johnny,” you say.
The second you close the door, you feel a giant weight lifted off you. You just feel tired. It’s obvious that there aren’t any feelings there anymore, so him pretending he cares as a pretense to see you just feels irritating.
“Are you okay?” Joshua asks, eyes raking over you.
“Yeah, I’m good,” you say.
“You sure?” he asks.
“Yeah, really. I think I knew when I saw him at my parents’ house that time you came over for dinner that I was completely over it,” you say. “I’m sorry he tried to bring something like that up or make it a big deal.”
“I don’t care. It’s like you said, I did it and I’m not ashamed of that,” he says. “But, uh, I really wanted to thank you.”
“For what?” you ask.
“For defending me and for saying you trust me,” he says. It makes you a little shy for a second, so you look down.
“Oh, well, it’s not a big deal,” you say.
Joshua closes the space and tilts your chin up to look at him. “It’s a huge deal to me. I know we started pretending, but trusting me means the absolute world.”
“You make it easy,” you admit.
That seems to render him a little speechless as well because all he does is pull you into him in the tightest hug he’s ever given you. Your body fits into his like a puzzle piece. Which sounds sappy, even if in your head, and you don’t actually care. It’s the safest and the happiest you’ve ever felt.
“What?” he asks when you pull away.
“Nothing, I just think this is going to work,” you say.
Joshua smiles at you, that genuine smile he saves for when he’s at his happiest. “Yeah, I think so too.”
i hope you enjoyed this fic! let me know your thoughts 💕
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pairing; yoon jeonghanx f reader
genre; smut (minors dni), angst, fluff/romance, comedy
summary; being friends with benefits with jeonghan has never been what you thought it would but taking a trip to Paris with him and the rest of your friends while expecting to keep it a secret…that’s something completely different.
warnings; eating/drinking, alcohol, mentions flying in a plane, inaccurate french, a bit of self deprecating thoughts and feelings, hiding a relationship, idiots in love, oral (f receiving), fingering, jealousy, crying (from pleasure and not), petnames, unprotected sex, cum on skin/creampie – as always there might be a warning I am missing but do try.
w/c; 19k and some change (489 words on patreon)
a/n; as always I have to thank @junkissed for not only proofreading but also helping me with coming up with so many brilliant ideas. I also want to thank @wooahaeproductions for lending me her brilliant brain and offering so many beautiful ideas. -- after much thought i have decided to sporadically release some of my older patreon exclusives if and when i am feeling generous. since i am working on tkg and unable to release anything the way i would like to i posted a bonus for patreon subscribers and i am releasing this to you all here on tumblr. i hope you enjoy it. to those of you who were less than kind when i first posted it, i hope this teaches you a lesson of patience and humility. if you had been nicer to me this might have came to tumblr sooner.
before continuing remember reblogs are incredibly important and please read how to support me here
“I’ll try not to slobber on your shoulder.”
You roll your eyes with a faint laugh at Mingyu’s words as he sits on your right in the aisle seat. The “fasten seatbelt” sign had just turned off and a quick glance at your phone told you that the plane had been in the air for about an hour. It was going to be a long 13 hour flight to Paris and while Mingyu was settling in to take a nap, you weren’t sure you were going to be following suit.
Jeonghan purses his lips, watching you shift in your seat. You looked restless and he understood the feeling. While he felt like he could get up and take a walk along the aisle, beside him, Dokyeom was snuggled up against the window, watching a movie on the screen in front of him.
Slipping out of his seat, Jeonghan leans to bump his hip against Mingyu, only to make the man groan, opening his eyes in annoyance. You were looking up at your friend curiously, your brows furrowed as he pursed his lips and jutted his thumb back over to where he had been sitting just a moment before.
“Trade with me.”
Confusion slowly spreads across Mingyu’s face as he looks from Jeonghan to you and back up at the other man. Lifting his brows, Jeonghan sighs and waves his hands as if trying to hurry Mingyu out of his seat, as if he were in the wrong spot, when clearly Mingyu had known he was supposed to sit beside you.
“What? You serious?”
“The fuck, you mean, am I serious? I’m talking, aren’t I?” Letting out another sigh, Jeonghan gestures towards Dokyeom once again.” Gyu…Go sit beside Dokyeom and cuddle with him. Clearly, you both want to sleep and Y/N isn’t going to. I want someone to talk to.”
Groaning, Mingyu looks back at you as you give him a soft, pouty smile, reaching up to pat his cheek as he begrudgingly gives up his spot to Jeonghan. Sliding past the smaller man, Mingyu narrows his eyes at him, only to get a smirk in return as Jeonghan slips into the seat with a happy sigh.
Dokyeom glances over to Mingyu as he slumps down in the seat, pulling his blanket over his legs, as he watches Jeonghan look over at you with a grin on his face. There was something weird about what had just happened but he couldn’t put his finger on it. Shrugging, Mingyu glances towards the movie playing in front of Dokyeom as he leans his head to rest it on his friend’s shoulder, watching it on mute as his eyes get heavy.
“Jeonghan…You are so full of shit.”
Your words draw Jeonghan’s attention as he adjusts his seat, leaning it back to get more comfortable beside you. It was going to be a long ass flight but his traveling companion had just gotten exponentially more attractive.
“Why? Did I lie?”
Rolling your eyes, you glance away from Jeonghan and out of the window as he smiles at you. Yoon Jeonghan was one of your best friends. When the idea of going on this group trip to Paris came up, you weren’t sure if you wanted to go but it had been him who had talked you into it. There were plenty of reasons not to go but in his opinion, there were even more reasons to go.
Your relationship with Jeonghan was complicated. It hadn’t started out that way. You had met him along with the rest of your friends in college. All of you were studying different things but at the end of the day, it was your personalities that had led you all together.
Kim Mingyu had been the first friend that you had made and your gateway into the group. Many others had come and gone but by the end of four grueling years at university, there were fourteen of you that had stuck together and now ten of you are on a plane for a once in a lifetime vacation.
When you don’t answer him right away, Jeonghan lets his eyes run along your neck and up to your pretty face. He had always had a harder time than some of the others when it came to keeping it platonic with you. Then, last Halloween, Jeonghan found out he wasn’t the only one struggling with that feeling.
Maybe it had been the alcohol or maybe it had been all of the tension in the air but in a dark corner of Seungcheol’s apartment, you and Jeonghan had shared your first heated kiss. That kiss had turned into a long conversation the next day, which led to an even longer discussion about how neither one of you wanted to fuck up your friendship.
“We will just have rules, Y/N.”
You had sighed as Jeonghan had run his fingers along your jaw, tilting your head up so he could look at your face as he spoke. You hadn’t wanted to agree to the idea of being friends with benefits but the ache between your thighs every time you looked at him had been enough to keep you listening and to make your lips part as he had ran his thumb under your bottom lip.
“If either one of us wants to stop, we just say it. No deep conversations have to happen. My only rule is that if you are going to fuck someone else, tell me. I don’t want to be second best.”
Jeonghan had listened to you whining softly under your breath as his fingernails scratched along the side of your head at your hairline. He had known you wanted it as much as he did but what he didn’t know was that it was going to hurt you just as much as it was already hurting him. It seemed like such a simple solution to how he was feeling. He would get to have you in his life even more. He would get to fuck you as much as possible, but then you’d leave every single fucking time and it would start to hurt every single fucking time.
Turning back towards Jeonghan as you feel his eyes moving along your skin, you fight the urge to move closer to him in your seat. You weren’t alone on the plane and your friends weren’t that far from you, with Mingyu and Dokyeom sitting diagonally across the aisle and Jihoon and Joshua behind you.
“You could have kept Dokyeom awake to talk.”
Smirking, Jeonghan purses his lips as he moves to lean across you, pulling down the shade on the window, leaving you and him both veiled in the low light of the cabin. You sigh as you feel his fingers slide along your forearm to your wrist, his fingernails causing chillbumps to spread along your skin as he draws small circles on your skin.
“I don’t want to talk to Dokyeom, I want to talk to you.”
Sighing softly, you glance down at your hand as Jeonghan runs his fingers along yours before linking his hand with yours. You knew the light was dim enough that no one would see and that if anyone did, they probably wouldn’t ask too many questions because Jeonghan was just a touchy guy to begin with. What you didn’t know was why your heart was in your throat. You didn’t know why your friend with benefits even wanted to hold your hand in the first place.
“Listen…I’m just saying we already came up with the rooming arrangements before we even got on the fucking plane. Why are you two being such bitches about it now?”
You sigh, leaning against Mingyu’s arm, as Joshua stares at Seungkwan and Chan in the hotel lobby. You already knew who you were rooming with and he was doing a great job holding you up at the moment. It was just the youngest of your group who were being cry babies about their rooms.
“We are here for a week, Shua! If you had to spend every single night in a room with Lee Chan, you’d bitch a little bit about it too.”
Groaning, Jihoon rolls his suitcase towards the group, causing Soonyoung to whine as his roommate swipes the card from Seungkwan’s hand before offering his to Chan.
“Why do I have to lose my best friend over this?”
Jeonghan laughs at Soonyoung’s dramatics as Chan pouts, knowing Soonyoung was going to be upset at him for the rest of the day because of the rooming arrangement. You watch the eldest of the group pat Joshua on the back as he gestures for Dokyeom to head for the elevator.
“Come on, Y/N. You look like you could use a nap.”
Hearing your name, you blink up at Mingyu before offering him a tired smile. There had been little sleep on the plane. You had never been good at sleeping on transportation but between that and Yoon Jeonghan at your side, it had been a battle you were destined to lose.
Holding the door back, Jeonghan purses his lips, waiting for you and Mingyu to get in before he presses the button, causing Joshua and Jun to throw up their hands when the door starts to close in their faces.
“Oops! It’s full!”
You knew Jeonghan was being a menace. The lack of sleep was adding another level to his usual antics. Leaning against the elevator wall, Jeonghan watches as you sigh, your head leaned forward as Mingyu stands beside you, his and your luggage in hand as the elevator climbs. He had wondered on the plane if there was a way to switch rooms but that would be too obvious and Mingyu had already looked like a kicked puppy when he had made him give up his seat.
With a final ding, the elevator doors open to a long hallway. Glancing at the wall, Mingyu mutters under his breath before taking a left before looking back at you with a laugh that comes to a stop to let you catch up to him.
“Come on, Squirt. We are in 546.”
Jeonghan rolls his eyes, following behind you and Mingyu, not even noticing the look that Dokyeom is giving him. While Mingyu didn’t seem to realize the relationship that was right in front of him, Dokyeom wasn’t as oblivious. He knew there had been something different for months, even if Jeonghan wouldn’t tell him what it was.
“Don’t plot his murder yet, he’s not flirting. She’s like his sister.”
Dokyeom’s voice is barely over a whisper but Jeonghan still looks at him as if he is announcing his words to the world. It was that sort of wide eyed, deer caught in the headlights look that told Dokyeom that he was right.
“I–shut up. I know that. He’s just dumb. I’m not doing anything.”
Chuckling under his breath, Dokyeom nods along with Jeonghan’s rambling as the two watch you and Mingyu open your hotel door before you offer them both a quick smile and wave, disappearing into the room and leaving them in the hallway.
“Sure, man. Whatever you say, you have the key.”
Waking up to a dimly lit room, you wince at the pain behind your eyes as you try to look around at the other bed, seeing it still made and empty. There was no sign of Mingyu in the room besides his now empty suitcase at the end of his bed and a few of his things strewn about on a couch in the corner of the room.
You hadn’t meant to nap for as long as you clearly had but the flight had been long and now you were feeling bad about how much you must be missing from the trip. It wasn’t like there was a planned itinerary for every single day, but you did have some plans as a group and with different people. Otherwise, you were free to travel the city or use your time as you saw fit. Apparently, for the first few hours spent in Paris, you saw fit to snore into a very comfortable pillow.
Reaching for your phone, you whine at the headache plaguing you as you look through your texts, seeing a few that you had missed along with a couple phone calls.
[Missed call: Cheol at 11:30 a.m.]
[Missed call: Cheol at 2:16 p.m.]
Cheol: I talked to Gyu. He said you passed the fuck out. Call me later. Wish I was there. 😭
Mingyu: Going out with Shua and Jun~~ be back later. Love you 😙
Jeonghan: Are you awake yet? Let’s order room service.
Sighing, you tap Jeonghan’s message first, hovering over the keyboard before finally replying.
Y/N: I just woke up. Mingyu is out.
Jeonghan had been awake for about an hour longer than you so when you finally text him back, he glances down at his cellphone resting on his stomach with a soft smile. At least he had been smiling until you mentioned Mingyu.
Jeonghan: I know where he is. I wasn’t asking to order room service with him.
Y/N: Fine…
While you didn’t sound entirely convincing, Jeonghan wasn’t going to turn down the chance to spend some time alone with you. He knew where Mingyu was along with Dokyeom and he knew they would be gone, at least for a few more hours.
Sliding off the bed, you move into the bathroom to grab some pain reliever, making it back to the mini fridge by the time you hear the knock at the door. Leaning to pull the door open, you meet Jeonghan’s eyes before his gaze slowly moves over your frame and back up to your face as he slips into the room, closing and locking the door behind him.
“I didn’t think you were ever gonna wake up. I almost asked Mingyu to let me in before he left.”
Scoffing, you swallow your medicine with a gulp of water as you feel Jeonghan’s fingers sliding along your hip. You knew he was kidding, at least mostly. As far as you knew, he didn’t want anyone to know he was fucking you and you didn’t want to fuck up your friendship with him, no matter how much it hurt to be a dirty little secret.
“So he could ask you why?”
Shaking his head, Jeonghan lets you pull away from him as you move back to your bed, flopping down on it with a groan. He had noticed the medicine in your hand and he could see the way your brows were furrowed. He had known you long enough to know the signs of your headaches and when you weren’t feeling well. Sitting down next to you, Jeonghan runs his hand along your leg to the end of your shorts as you look at your phone, responding to the rest of your text messages.
“He could have asked why. I don’t care. You want me to just pick something for us to eat?”
Wrinkling your nose, lost in thought, you glance at Jeonghan as his fingers push under the leg of your shorts, a concerned look on his face. He was full of shit 90% of the time but there were times when the two of you were alone that he made your heart tighten in your chest.
“Mm, yeah. Just gonna call Cheol back and wait for this medicine to kick in.”
Nodding, Jeonghan watches you for a moment longer before leaning in to press a soft kiss to your lips, causing you to close your eyes and return it as your fingers barely hold on to your cell phone. There was no reason for him to kiss you.
When the two of you came up with the rules of your relationship, there were no strings attached. It had started out with no kisses goodbye, but that rule had quickly been broken. Then the no sleeping over rule had been broken more than once by both of you, and now Jeonghan was sending your brain into a frenzy with such a sweet gesture as he smiled against your lips before sitting back to take out his own phone, pulling up the room service menu.
Swallowing hard, you furrow your brows, lifting your fingers to press them against your lips as you make yourself pull your eyes away from the handsome man in front of you and back to your phone, pressing down on Seungcheol’s name. You knew it was late in Korea but not so late that he wouldn’t still be awake.
“Hey…didn’t think I’d hear from you today.”
Seungcheol’s voice makes you pout. You could hear the sadness in his tone as he leaned back in his gaming chair. You had offered to stay back and hang out with him but between his insistence that you go and Jeonghan’s whining, you had paid for your ticket, leaving an injured Seungcheol under the care of your other friends who couldn’t make the trip.
“Sorry, I was so tired from the flight. How are you feeling today?”
Scoffing, Seungcheol looks down at the brace on his knee before leaning his head back in annoyance, not really at your question but at the situation.
“Fine. Minghao went with me to rehab and then Vernon and Wonwoo hung out and played some games earlier.” Pursing his lips, Seungcheol glances out his window at the lights of the city, listening to the sounds of the traffic compared to the quiet sounds of your conversation. “How’s Paris?”
Jeonghan closes one eye in thought before turning his phone towards you to ask if his order was okay, only getting a nod before you sigh and give your attention back to the phone call. You had been disappointed when any of the group had been unable to come along but especially Seungcheol. He and Mingyu were like family more than they were friends and now part of your family had a torn ACL and was stuck in his apartment playing video games and eating takeout while you were visiting a foreign country.
“I’m glad they are taking care of you. We miss you. I haven’t seen much other than the back of my eyelids, Cheollie.”
You say we before you even think about what you are saying, causing Jeonghan and unknown to you, Seugncheol to furrow their brows. It wasn’t like you had lied; Jeonghan had wanted his best friend to come on the trip but it wasn’t like he knew that he was in the room.
“We…” Smirking to himself, Seungcheol shifts in his chair, reaching out to move his mouse across his screen to open his game back up, knowing he was going to end the phone call sooner than he had even anticipated. “Tell Han I said hi. Call me tomorrow. Love you.”
Groaning, you avoid Jeonghan’s eyes as he searches your face, seeing a look of embarrassment wash over your expression. Your relationship with Jeonghan was a secret from most of the group but it had been Seungcheol’s apartment that you had been making out with Jeonghan in and he wasn’t an idiot.
“Shut up… I–Cheol says hi.” Sighing, you watch Jeonghan lean his head back, realizing what had happened as you finished up your phone call. “Love you too; talk to you tomorrow.”
Lowering your phone, you meet Jeonghan’s eyes as he stares at you, tilting his head. You could see the question on his face but you weren’t sure you were up to answering it. Instead, you toss your phone down on the bed and groan as he watches your dramatics, putting his hand back on your thigh unable to stop the smile that pulls at his lips.
“We miss you, Cheollie.” You could hear the teasing in Jeonghan’s voice even as you lifted your arm to rest it over your face. “Why did he assume it was me?”
Groaning his name, you turn on your back, causing Jeonghan’s hand to slide to your inner thigh, where he lets it rest. You squirm slightly, feeling his thumb rub small circles along your skin as he watches you closely much to your dismay.
“Probably because Mingyu is out and he has already talked to him.”
You fail to tell Jeonghan the part about how Seungcheol also knows that you are fucking Jeonghan but he is nice enough to only tease you sometimes about how much it’s going to break your heart one day. Sliding your arm from your face, you sigh as Jeonghan’s fingers start to work into the tight muscle of your thigh. It felt good; it was a nice gesture but you knew there was an ulterior motive to it.
“We can’t do anything while we are here, Jeonghan. We have no idea when Mingyu will be back, and I don’t –”
An annoyed groan slipping from between Jeonghan’s lips makes you fall silent as he slides up in bed and between your legs to hover over you on the bed. Your heart was beginning to race from the image of him above you to the thrill of the situation. You really didn’t know when Mingyu was coming back from his outing and the food could be delivered at any moment.
“We are in Paris and you are going to lay on this bed and tell me that we aren’t going to fuck while we are here?”
Slotting his leg between your thighs, Jeonghan smirks when he hears a whine get caught in your throat. There were many things he loved but one of them was feeling the warmth of your pussy, clothed or not, against his thigh. He loved when you would instinctively start to buck your hips against his leg just from the desire to feel any sort of release because you had to chase it.
“Y/N…baby…princess…my beautiful angel…”
All the pet names that fall from Jeonghan’s silver tongue cause your fingers to dig into the comforter as you try to fight the urge to roll your hips against his thigh. You can’t help but lift your right hand, grabbing for something more substantial, and find Jeonghan’s shirt when you feel his lips press against your neck as he kisses up to your ear. With each kiss, Jeonghan speaks and allows his warm breath to tempt you even further.
“I might actually die if I can’t have you this entire time.” You knew he was being dramatic but you could also feel how hard Jeonghan was getting against your thigh so he was doing a good job of convincing you that he was telling you the truth. “We can be so careful. I’ll make it worth it.”
You knew he would keep that promise. Every time with Jeonghan was worth it. No matter how much you tried to lie to yourself, even the cracks that were starting to line your heart and the stress building in your mind were worth it.
Jeonghan whines your name against your jaw as his hand pulls your hips up and tighter against his thigh. He could feel the way you were starting to roll your hips and it made him want to lay on the bed under you and watch you ride his cock like that until he filled you full of his cum. He wanted nothing more than to keep you like this forever, to make this simple like it was in his head but his heart was making it complicated. His heart had made it complicated from day one.
“Bonjour, service en chambre.”
The voice of someone on the other side of the door and a stern knock pull you and Jeonghan from your lust filled haze quickly. With an annoyed groan, Jeonghan rests his head against your shoulder before nodding against it as the man announces himself again, trying to get any response from the room.
“Oui, une minute, s'il vous plaît.”
Meeting your eyes, Jeonghan takes a deep breath before sliding off the bed to adjust his sweatpants. You could hear the frustration in Jeonghan’s sighs as he ran his fingers through his dark hair, moving towards the door and letting you sit up on the bed. In reality, there was nothing for either of you to be upset about. He had placed the order so it wasn’t surprising that it was being delivered in a timely manner.
“Merci…”
The word falls from Jeonghan’s lips like venom as he takes the bags from the man before slamming the door in his face. Turning back to face you, Jeonghan gives you an incredulous look, finding you pressing your lips together and trying not to laugh at him. He didn’t find anything about the situation funny.
“I got cock blocked and you are laughing?”
Smiling, you reach your hand out to help Jeonghan with one of the bags, taking out the drinks and sitting them on the nightstand out of any danger of spilling, as he grumbles under his breath. You can’t help but laugh again, opening both straws and finding him pouting at you.
“You didn’t even offer him a tip. Are you that pissed off?”
Opening one of the containers with more force than necessary, Jeonghan grabs one of the forks, stabbing at a piece of pasta and lifting it to his lips, still pouting.
“Is your cock still hard and not wet, Y/N? Oh, that’s right, you don’t have a cock that gets painfully hard every time you look at your incredibly hot gi—friend.”
Coughing as he takes a bite of food, Jeonghan looks down as he almost slips up on his wording, hoping you won’t notice. You just furrow your brows, your straw pursed on your lips, as you watch him for a moment before taking a sip and tilting the drink towards him, offering it to him to do the same.
You weren’t sure what you had heard. You knew what you wanted to hear but at the same time, did you? What would that mean? So instead of lingering on it, you focus on the rest of his nonsense, letting Jeonghan off the hook for his slip up.
“No, I don’t have a cock but I do get horny. You act like girls don’t get just as horny as guys. It’s not my fault that I can just hide it better.”
Scoffing, Jeonghan leans towards you, taking a sip of your drink before turning his fork towards you to offer you a bite of the pasta, feeling the warmth that had risen in his neck and face starting to fade. Maybe he had just gotten lucky and you hadn’t caught the word he had almost used to refer to you or maybe you were just being nice. Either way, he wasn’t going to push the subject if you weren’t.
Watching you take the bite from the fork, Jeonghan lets his eyes move over your face, lingering on your eyes. You were so beautiful, it was painful, and he was being honest when he said he didn’t want to waste the time the two of you had in Paris. It would be a waste to fly so far and not indulge in you as much as he could.
You furrow your brows as Jeonghan’s eyes fall to the bed, the two of you eating mostly in silence until finally you are the first one to break the tension as you groan, rubbing your hand over your stomach with a grin on your face. Jeonghan can’t help but smile once again, feeling endeared by you as he takes another sip of drink before putting it back on the nightstand.
“Full?”
Nodding, you stretch on as Jeonghan works to close containers and cleans up, moving around your room. You watch as he glances back at you, his eyes moving along the length of your body, to the arch of your back when you whine into a yawn. Smiling, you reach for your phone, checking your messages, and at the same time feeling him lay on the bed next to you, slender fingers barely graving over your stomach, before Jeonghan slides his hand under your shirt to have contact with your skin.
“I’m not.”
Your laugh makes Jeonghan smile. The smile is genuine and full—not one of his half smiles that he would give to just anyone. No, this smile is one that is meant just for you. Reaching up to take your phone out of your hand, Jeonghan whispers your name and you can hear the need and desire laced in his voice like a question. With your brows furrowed, you can only meet his eyes and nod before his lips are back on yours.
Whimpered moans slip into Jeonghan’s mouth as his fingers slide under the top of your shorts and between your legs. It was one thing to feel you against his thigh and it was another to feel your wet pussy on his fingers.
Jeonghan groans into the kiss. He can’t help the smile that pulls at his lips, feeling you lift your hips towards his hand as his fingers spread your folds. Between breathy kisses, the sticky, wet sounds of Jeonghan’s fingers teasing you are all you can hear, even as you mutter, begging him for more.
“More? Like what? What do you want, beautiful?”
Squeezing your eyes shut tightly, you practically sob out a moan of frustration at Jeonghan’s question. You knew how much he liked you to tell him exactly what you wanted and he knew how much you just wanted him to give him everything. Pushing your head back against the pillow, you bite at your bottom lip only to have Jeonghan’s teeth pull it from yours with a dark laugh.
“What do you want, Y/N? My fingers or my mouth?”
Tears run from your eyes along your temples as Jeonghan’s lips press against yours teasingly. He was driving you crazy with his light touches to your clit, and it was making it hard to think and even harder to speak. Arching your back, you gasp Jeonghan’s name as his thumb and forefinger close around your clit, rolling the small bud between his fingers, waiting for you to speak.
“Ah–fuck! Both…please? Please, just give me both. I can’t stand it.”
It had been longer than Jeonghan would have liked since he had been in your bed and normally he would be more strict. Normally he would make you pick one thing and draw out your orgasm until you were begging him through tears for more, but just feeling your slick arousal on his fingers made Jeonghan weak for you.
Moving to his knees, Jeonghan pushes his fingers into the top of your shorts and underwear. You only manage a soft whimper of his name as he slides them down your legs and tosses them onto the floor before letting his eyes roam over you. Licking his lips, Jeonghan slides his hands under your knees, pulling your hips down in bed as he lays on his stomach so that your pussy is level with his face.
“Fuck…Jeonghan, please? Stop teasin—”
Running his tongue from your entrance to the top of your mound, Jeonghan silences you as he groans to your taste. It really had been too long since he had been between your legs and he was starving. The food had been nothing in comparison to this and he was feeling almost feral after a single drop of you on his tongue.
Long, slender fingers part your folds as Jeonghan moves his other hand from under your leg to circle your dripping hole with his middle finger as you moan his name. He could play you like a well tuned instrument and he knew every note by heart.
Turning his hand palm up, Jeonghan groans under his breath, feeling your warm, soft walls welcome in his finger and tighten around them. He could just imagine how good you would feel on his cock and it had him leaking profusely in his sweatpants as he willed himself not to rut against the bed, lowering his head to flick his tongue at your throbbing clit.
There have been few people in your life who made you feel as good in bed as Yoon Jeonghan and there were none who looked as good as him between your thighs. No one’s hair felt as good between your fingers as you held them against you; their lips wrapped around your clit as their fingers steadily pushed you towards heaven. No, that was only Yoon Jeonghan.
You tasted better than anything that Jeonghan could imagine. He had wanted this from the moment that he had walked into the room and now that he was lucky enough to be between your legs, he could feel his head going fuzzy with just thoughts of you. You were like a drug that he could never get enough of.
It was the feeling of your velvet walls clenching around his fingers as he pushed you over the edge and the sounds of your sweet little moans that caused Jeonghan to almost lose it. Words almost escape between his lips—three little words that could ruin everything. Closing his eyes tightly, Jeonghan buries his face against you to silence himself, enjoying the taste of your cum on his tongue until the sound of your phone causes him to furrow his brows.
Your fingers tear at the bedding under you as Jeonghan tries his best to pull another orgasm from you until the familiar sound of your ringtone starts to play from beside you on the bed. Gasping for a full breath, you glance over to see Chan’s face as Jeonghan looks up at you from between your legs with a disappointed look on his face.
“Let it go to voicemail.”
That was one option but if Chan was calling you, there had to be a reason. Whining, you slide your hand across the bed, listening to Jeonghan groan in annoyance, laying his face against your thigh as you do. Licking your lips, you catch your breath before putting your phone on your chest and answering the phone while speaking, hoping it will mask some of your labored breathing.
“Chan? What’s up?”
Closing his eyes tightly, Jeonghan shakes his head as you answer the phone, knowing he isn't getting laid now. First, the hotel staff had bad timing and now Lee Chan was cock blocking him. Glancing back up at you and the phone, Jeonghan shifts to his elbow, leaning to wipe his lips as Chan finally speaks up, his voice instantly breaking your heart.
“Y/N…I forgot my key. Soonyoung is in the room and won’t answer the phone. He’s still mad about earlier and you apparently have to have the key to get back into the hotel past a certain time.”
Rolling his eyes, Jeonghan lets out a light scoff, causing you to shoot daggers from your eyes in his direction. You could hear that Chan was drunk and you had always had a soft spot for the younger boys in your group of friends. You had taken on the big sister role very quickly and took it seriously. Throwing his hands up, Jeonghan mouths “what?” in your direction at the look of disappointment on your face at his reaction before you simply roll your eyes and slide off the bed to pick up your shorts, sliding them back up your legs as you speak to Chan.
“I’ll come down and let you in and then we will go talk to Soonyoung. Give me like five minutes.”
Tossing your phone back on to the bed, you move past Jeonghan as he whines your name, trying to grab your hand, only to find your fingers slipping from his. He knew he was being selfish but fuck, he felt like he deserved it just a little bit. Every once in a while, people could be a little selfish and enjoy the company of their— Even in his head, he couldn’t think of the right word to call you, so Jeonghan watched you from the bathroom door instead as you freshened up.
“Can we try again later?”
Sighing, you glance at Jeonghan through the mirror as he leans his head against the door frame, a look of disappointment on his face that almost shatters your resolve. You wanted to be less “easy” and say maybe or maybe not but instead you just nod and try to walk past him, feeling Jeonghan’s hand slide around your waist. Soft lips press against yours and you feel your knees start to give at the feeling and at how much you want to pull Jeonghan back into your bed.
“I’ll text you in a bit.”
Six words and Jeonghan leaves you standing in your room, feeling confused and lost. Only the sound of a text and a selfie of a pouty Chan sitting on the steps, asking for a rescue, pulls you back to reality.
Your fingers move along the rows of silk and satin on the rack as you purse your lips. It wasn’t that the dresses weren’t gorgeous. All of them were and all of them cost half of your rent. Mingyu lifts his gaze towards you as he pulls a shirt from a rack, putting it up to his body, before turning towards the mirror to judge his choice.
“You can’t tell what they look like unless you actually look at them.”
Mingyu was your favorite shopping partner. You found out years ago that he loved to shop even more than you did. He had a great eye for what would look good on you and you were grateful for that because you seemed to lack that ability.
“They are so expensive, Gyu.”
Nodding, Mingyu glances at the tag of the shirt held against his chest before sighing and draping it over his arm. You glance up at the man as he moves beside you, being a lot more thorough with the dresses than you had been.
“It’s my treat. We need to find you something pretty to wear for tonight. You are going out with Jeonghan, right?”
You feel the heat rise in your cheeks as you stumble over your feet, trying to take a step away from your best friend. Lifting his brow, Mingyu just smirked, taking one of the dresses from the rack—a long sleeved, soft mint green dress with a deep V neckline.
“I–Mingyu…first of all, no. I can’t let you buy it. Secondly, no… It’s dinner with Jeonghan and Dokyeom.”
Shaking his head, Mingyu moves closer, holding the dress up to you and reaching out with one hand to hold the long sleeve to your arm. Pursing his lips, Mingyu glances over his shoulder at the shop attendant, furrowing his brows, trying to remember anything he had practiced in French.
“Um… Excusez-moi. Salle des vêtements ?”
Smiling, you furrow your brows at Mingyu’s attempt to ask for a fitting room as the girl just smiles at him and lifts her brows, speaking in English as she gestures towards the back of the store.
“There are fitting rooms this way.”
Laying the dress over his arm along with his shirt, Mingyu shrugs before looking back at you as you laugh under your breath.
“What? What did I say?”
“You asked for the clothes room. I mean, not too far off.”
Sighing, Mingyu walks beside you before offering the pretty store attendant a dazzling smile before she leaves the two of you alone to try on your outfits.
“Well, it’s not like that’s the first time I’ve looked like an idiot in front of a woman. I don’t know how to say "fitting” in French.” Offering you the dress, Mingyu lifts his brows as you start to whine, looking at the price tag. “Try it on, Y/N.”
You slide your fingers over the silk, taking the dress from Mingyu, before going behind the curtain. The dress was beautiful. It was not what you would have picked for yourself just because you weren’t sure it was something you could pull off. The V of the neck was deep and would show off your collarbones. It would take at least ten minutes to button all of the buttons that led from your waist to your chest but by the time you were finished, you were even speechless as you stared at the mirror.
Adjusting the white button up over his chest, Mingyu turns to the side and nods at his appearance in the mirror before looking at the curtain you had disappeared behind. He knew you were going to look good but he also knew that your self esteem was going to get the better of you without a little push.
“Y/N…come on, get your ass out—oh…”
Words fall silent on Mingyu’s lips when you open the curtain, your leg peeking from the large slit that rests at the top of your thigh as you move into the center of the fitting room area towards the larger mirror where he stood. You were his best friend and more like a sister but he was also a guy at the end of the day and he had eyes. You were stunning.
“Is it awful? I told you that nothing in this place would look right on me.”
Shaking his head, Mingyu steps behind you, taking your shoulders to put you in front of the large mirror where lights would shine down on you, allowing you to see better how well the dress truly fits you. It hugged in all the right places and flowed in others.
“You are fucking beautiful. Yoon Jeonghan is going to lose his damn mind.”
Jeonghan couldn’t stop staring at you. He knew that the restaurant that the three of you had chosen to go to was nice but when he had met you in the lobby of the hotel with Dokyeom and you had been in that dress... Jeonghan had almost lost his mind.
You smile as Dokyeom walks beside you, his cheerful voice causing your face to light up like a star in the sky, while Jeonghan struggles to think straight. How could anyone be around you without wanting you? Jeonghan wasn’t sure how Dokyeom could act normal around you when you looked like you had stepped out of Jeonghan’s dreams.
Jeonghan was in love. He had known it for a while now but looking at you now, in that dress, under the Parisian street lamps... He couldn’t tell himself it was just lust anymore.
Glancing up at the sign for the restaurant, you can feel Jeonghan’s eyes on you. They hadn’t left you for the entire walk from the hotel to the restaurant. You felt like you were going to float away under his gaze but the only thing keeping you tethered to the ground was Dokyeom.
“The reservations are under your name, Y/N.”
Jeonghan’s voice brings your attention to him fully and you feel your cheeks heat up as if you were standing in front of an open flame. He looked incredible. You were all dressed up. The restaurant wasn’t incredibly fancy but it was considered fine dining so you all wanted to look the part. Jeonghan had chosen dark jeans, a dark button up with a jacket, and brown boots. Everything fits him perfectly and makes your mouth feel dry.
“Right…I’ll check in. Be right back.”
Two sets of eyes watch you but one lingers longer before Jeonghan finally pulls his eyes from the door to focus on Dokyeom with a long sigh.
“Y/N looks fantastic tonight, don’t you think?”
That was one way to put it. Jeonghan just scoffs into a laugh, lifting his hand to run it over his lips before nodding and narrowing his eyes, thinking about how to answer that question and what he even wanted to say. He knew what he wanted but he knew it would upset you if you found out. Fuck it.
“She looks beautiful.” Moving in closer to Dokyeom, Jeonghan watches the man lean his head back a bit, almost out of concern. His eyes widen as if the shorter man was going to hit him before Jeonghan smooths Dokyeom’s jacket and smiles. “If you make up a reason to leave now, I'll give you 50 bucks or literally anything you want.”
Laughing, Dokyeom tilts his head, thinking it has to be a joke, until he meets Jeonghan’s eyes and sees the serious look of desperation in them. He knew that his friend liked you but maybe it was reaching that point where he was willing to admit it to himself and you.
Swallowing hard, Dokyeom glances towards the door to see you smiling at the hostess, your eyes glancing towards him as you give him an apologetic look and say something else to the woman. There was no way he wasn’t going to get a guilt trip from you for leaving but if he didn't, Jeonghan might actually hit him.
“I–fuck man. Y/N is gonna be pissed at me. She’s the one who wanted us to all get dinner together, but...”
One more look into Jeonghan’s eyes and Dokyeom felt his excuse crumble. He could see how important this was to Jeonghan and now it felt important to him too.
“Yeah…alright. I’ll come up–”
“Okay! So she said, like ten more minutes.”
Stepping back from Jeonghan, Dokyeom clears his throat before smiling just a bit too big at you. You knew something was different but you just couldn’t put your finger on it. Jeonghan was pretty good at lying to you or at least at pulling something over on you but Dokyeom wasn’t.
“I am so sorry but I have to get back to the hotel. Rain check on dinner.”
Watching your face fall, Dokyeom feels his stomach tighten as you take a step towards him and he takes a step back, knowing that if you press him too much for answers, he will crumble.
“What? You were so excited. Why?”
Lifting his hands, Dokyeom gestures back towards the hotel and it’s as if you can see the gears moving in his head as he thinks of an excuse on his feet.
“Uh…Min–Mingyu. Yep, Mingyu texted me. He wants my help with something. So I gotta go, right now. Like right now. Bye!”
Starting to speak, you end up closing your mouth as Dokyeom lets out a squeal, quickly moving away from you into the flow of people heading away from the restaurant. Narrowing your eyes, you look back to Jeonghan, who rubs his lips together before smiling sweetly at you and lifting his hand, offering it to you.
“Looks like it’s just us, baby.”
Pushing your tongue into your cheek, you roll your eyes at Jeonghan before turning from his hand, realizing he must have had something to do with Dokyeom’s quick departure. You sigh as you feel his arms wrap around your waist from behind, Jeonghan’s chin resting on your shoulder as he smiles next to your ear before pouting.
“What? Are you mad at me? I didn’t leave.”
Leaning your head away from his lips, you hear Jeonghan let out a long sigh as you all but reject him again. Fingers tighten around your waist, pulling you back against him, and Jeonghan’s brows furrow deeply.
“Y/N…seriously?” A quick glance from you has Jeonghan leaning his head back with a groan before he nods, giving in. “Yes, I asked him to leave. Is that what you wanted to hear?”
Your features soften at Jeonghan’s confession. You had figured that he had asked Dokyeom to leave but you hadn’t really expected him to tell you. You had expected to argue with him to the point that he would lie about it and then tell you the truth around the time for dessert. What was different about tonight?
“I–what? Yes…I didn’t want you to lie to me.”
Jeonghan’s hands slide from your waist as he begrudgingly lets you stand on your own, as if coming to the realization that you don’t want to be held or to hold his hand. You watch as his eyes widen, a small smile pulling at his lips when you slide your hand along his.
“Mademoiselle?”
Glancing up at the woman you had spoken to earlier, you let out a soft breath, giving her a smile and a nod before leading Jeonghan along with you. He listens as you explain that your party has become two and she drops off a menu at the front before leading you and Jeonghan to a table near a window.
Watching you from across the table, Jeonghan takes a deep breath as you look down at your menu, his eyes moving as he tilts his head to see your legs crossed just off to the side of the table. He knew that he should be more civilized, perhaps more respectful but the way the dress was hugging your thighs and the way the slit of the dress was sitting so high on your leg was making his mouth water.
Licking your lips, you start to ask Jeonghan what he is thinking about ordering when you lift your eyes to find his eyes moving along your legs and up your body. The heat rises once again in your neck and up your face at the amount of attention he was giving you. You had known he had been looking at you but you hadn’t expected him to do it so obviously now.
Meeting your eyes and finding you watching him, Jeonghan grins, having been caught by you. He knew he should be embarrassed but instead, he just lets out a breath and shakes his head.
“You are so fucking pretty. I’m sorry… I can’t stop staring at you. That was why I asked Dokyeom to bail on dinner. I wanted you all to myself. I’m selfish.”
Shifting in your seat, you reach for the water in front of you, taking a sip at Jeonghan’s words. You hadn’t expected him to speak so candidly about his reasoning for why Dokyeom had left or why he was looking at you the way he was. You watch his smile soften and his gaze drop to his menu, allowing you a moment of clarity to take your own breath as you get a break from his attention.
“You are selfish.” Your voice is quiet and meek but Jeonghan smiles, letting out an amused breath before looking up at you once again as you continue. “You could have just asked me to dinner on your own.”
Jeonghan swallows hard at your words, his confident facade breaking slightly as he looks down at his menu. Clearing his throat, Jeonghan tries to think of the right words before he finally manages to meet your eyes again.
“Is it shitty of me that I’m afraid you’ll turn me down? So this way, we were all going out. You had more of a reason to be here.”
Your heart shouldn’t be aching the way it was hearing another confession from Jeonghan but it was breaking your heart. You didn’t know how to feel. You weren’t sure what he even wanted you to say. The rules had been clear. You were just friends. Has that changed?
“Jeonghan…”
The whine in your voice sounds similar to a rejection and Jeonghan can’t stand the idea of that so he just smiles and holds up his hands, happy to see the waiter standing beside you. He didn’t want to hear how he wasn’t good enough. He wasn’t Kim Mingyu or Choi Seungcheol. He already knew, but that didn’t make him want you any less. Maybe he could still prove it to you.
Jeonghan was thankful for the wine running through yours and his system as you laughed, leaning against his body. He knew you weren’t so drunk that you weren’t thinking clearly but you were feeling free enough that any of the earlier tension seemed to have melted away.
“It was so good. Those coffee truffles… Jeonghan, oh my god. Babe, will you go back and get me more?”
Hearing you call him babe was like injecting his veins with serotonin. Jeonghan nods before leaning to press a kiss to your jaw as you laugh sweetly. He would give you the world if you asked for it and laughed so beautifully for him like that.
“Mm, I don’t wanna go to bed.”
You pout into your words, looking up at the hotel, as you dig into your purse for your key and Jeonghan holds on to your waist with a grin. You were adorable all of the time but when you were even a little tipsy, you dialed up the cute factor by a hundred, making him melt at the sight of you. Sliding the key from your fingers, Jeonghan listens to your laughter as he taps it against the reader and pulls open the door as you thank him.
“Then we won’t go to our rooms yet. I know a place. I found it earlier.”
Jeonghan piqued your curiosity, causing you to tilt your head with a small, curious sound. Laughing, the man lets you lean on him as he walks to the elevator, still using your key to open it, before pressing the button for the top floor.
“Where are we going?”
You lean between Jeonghan’s legs as he rests against the elevator wall, the quiet beeps of each floor being passed acting as background music. Smiling, Jeonghan slides his hands along the soft silk of your dress to rest them on your hips, leaning his head back against the wall with a small chuckle at your question.
“Up.”
One final ding and the doors open to a long, quiet hallway. You lean back on your heels to look, making Jeonghan hold your wrists to keep you steady. The coast looked pretty clear; only a housekeeping cart and a few room service trays left outside the doors let you know to keep your voices down.
Lifting his finger to his lips, Jeonghan smiles behind his finger as you lower your head to suppress a laugh sticking by his side. The two of you sneak down the hallway, only stopping at the housekeeping cart long enough for Jeonghan to grab a blanket slipping it under his arm.
“Where are we going?”
The question once again slips from your lips as you glance back to make sure no one was following you and Jeonghan as he turns to the left to what seems like a dead end, a door leading to an emergency exit to the roof. Raising his brows, Jeonghan pushes the door with his shoulder and you wince, ready to hear an alarm but when nothing happens except the door opening, your eyes soften and your mouth falls open in surprise.
“Shhh, our little secret.”
Keeping your hand tightly in his, Jeonghan climbs the steps before pushing open a second door, causing you to gasp at the sight. From the roof of the hotel, you can see for miles on a clear night. The lights of the city twinkling and burning like stars and in the distance, even the Eiffel Tower greets you like something out of a movie as you let go of Jeonghan’s hand moving towards the wall lining the entire roof.
Jeonghan just watches you in awe as the wind lightly moves the dress around your legs as you rest your hands on the wall, looking out into the city. Sure, the city was beautiful but it had nothing on you. He had been to more places than most in the group but none of them compared to this... to you now.
“Oh my god... Jeonghan, this is so pretty. I’m so glad you found this.”
Hands slide around your waist as Jeonghan moves to stand behind you with a smile on his lips. He had wanted to wait a bit longer and just watch you but the urge to touch you was just too great. Leaning back against him, you laugh under your breath, sliding your hands over his, taking in a deep breath of the night air. This was perfect. If you could write out how you wish your life could be lived every day and every night, it would be like this. You would be in Jeonghan’s arms, looking out over a beautiful city. But that was a pipe dream.
Nudging his nose against your neck, Jeonghan furrows his brows, feeling your shoulders drop. He could sense your mood changing but he wasn’t sure why. All he knew was that he could and wouldn’t let something so perfect go to waste.
“Can we pretend?”
Jeonghan’s words, spoken against your neck, are almost so quiet that you have to strain to hear them but you close your eyes and furrow your brows in question.
“What?”
Pressing his hands tighter against your stomach, Jeonghan practically whines out his words, causing your heart to tighten and practically shatter.
“That we are more than this. Just tonight? That’s all I’m asking for. I know I’m not fucking worth it… but just pretend for me? One…fucking night?”
If he had any idea what he was asking you to do, it didn’t seem to show. You were already suffering with the arrangement that you had and now he wanted more without actually having more. It was almost unbearable and yet all you can do is whimper out a “yes” and a “please, Jeonghan,” like the pathetic woman you are. You say it because you are irrevocably in love with Jeonghan and you can’t admit it openly to yourself, much less to him.
Turning in his arms, you reach up to cup Jeonghan’s cheek as you feel his fingernails scratch along the silk of your dress at your waist. Dark brown eyes search yours for a short moment until soft lips finally connect with yours, taking your breath away.
Jeonghan was always a good kisser but there was something about this kiss that felt different. This kiss felt desperate, as if he was trying to make a point or to ingrain it into your memory forever, just in case there wasn’t a second chance.
You whine out a soft moan, stepping back from the side of the roof as Jeonghan catches your bottom lip between his. He feels your free hand tug at the front of his jacket as if you are trying to keep him in place but just a few more steps back, he finally stops before pulling away to pick up the blanket he had put to the side.
You watch as Jeonghan lays out the blanket, kneeling down, before offering you his hand to help you do the same. Now it made sense; of course he had a plan. He always did. He was the type of person to think three steps ahead of everyone and usually five steps ahead of you. Carefully moving down to the blanket, you let Jeonghan pull you into his lap, his free hand tracing the line of your thigh and tugging your dress up your legs so as not to cause your dress to rip on the way down.
“You look so fucking pretty tonight, baby. This dress…fuck… I love it but I—shit, I gotta see you. Wanna see you under the stars. Wanna fuck you under them.”
It was cliche and yet Jeonghan’s words had your cheeks on fire. The words had your breath quickening as you straddled his lap, feeling his fingers trying to figure out how to impatiently undo the dozens of buttons as he whined in annoyance.
“Goddammit… There are too many.”
Shaking your head, you watch as Jeonghan glances up at you, mischief in his eyes as he grabs either side of your dress at the front, trying to tug at it to make the buttons come loose. Reaching up to grab his hands, you whine, making him sigh at you, his tongue running across his lips as you pout at him, trying to make him see reason.
“I didn’t buy it... It was a gift from Mingyu.”
Pressing his tongue into his cheek, Jeonghan lifts his brows, learning where your dress came from. He knew deep down that there was nothing between you and Mingyu but that didn’t stop him from seeing red in that moment and it didn’t stop him from making a split second decision. The sound of expensive buttons being flung across the roof makes you gasp as you lean back, looking down at your ruined dress as Jeonghan groans, leaning to kiss over the lace covering your breasts.
“Jeonghan…What the fuck?”
“I’ll buy you another one. I’ll buy you a hundred more. Just don’t say his name again, not tonight.”
Muttering against your chest, Jeonghan shakes his head, sliding his fingers along your shoulders to push the dress down your arms before he looks up to meet your eyes. You see no sense of regret or remorse in his eyes, just lust and something else that you aren’t sure if you can name or that you want to.
Leaning your head back, you close your eyes, feeling Jeonghan’s lips move up the length of your neck towards your jaw. Chillbumps erupt along your skin as his fingers guide your dress down your arms, letting the material pool at your waist when you slip your hands from the sleeves.
“Then don’t leave me like this alone.”
You whine out the words so sweetly that Jeonghan smiles on your skin, a small chuckle escaping his lips before he sits back, shrugging off his jacket, letting you help him undo the buttons of his shirt. Your nails lightly scratch his chest as your eyes take in his handsome face. You had looked at him hundreds of times this closely before but this time felt different and on some levels, you knew this time would hurt your heart more in the morning.
Tossing his shirt to the side, Jeonghan reaches up to cup your cheek, leaning to brush his lips against yours with a soft sigh at the feeling of your kiss. You were giving into a feeling this time and he could tell. Furrowing his brows, Jeonghan uses his free hand to work open the clasp of your bra, feeling it give way as you arch your chest towards him, your hands holding tightly to his biceps as if grounding you to the roof and to him.
Cold air nips at your breasts when Jeonghan slides the lace from your body before warm breath walks across the same path. You feel his hands holding the arch of your back as your fingers push through his hair, a moan slipping from your lips at the feeling of his lips against your skin.
“Please, Jeonghan…”
Furrowing his brows, Jeonghan pauses, leaving his lips pressed against the soft skin of your breast, when you breathe out his name, begging for more. In what seems like just a span of a heartbeat, you find yourself on your back on the blanket, Jeonghan hovering over you, his longer dark hair framing his face as his eyes move over your face.
Lifting your hips, you find yourself shying away from Jeonghan’s attention as he slips the dress down your legs, a shaky breath escaping from between his lips at the sight of you bare in front of him. He knew it had just been a day since he had laid between your legs but every time felt like a privilege, especially this time.
“Holy shit, baby…”
Trying to turn your head, Jeonghan’s long, slender fingers stop you. In Jeonghan's opinion, there was no reason for you to look away or for you to be embarrassed by anything. You were perfect.
Another soft, “please...” reaches Jeonghan’s ears as his thumb brushes under your bottom lip, causing his brows to knit together just slightly. He had heard you beg before; he had even made you beg but he didn’t want to make you beg or want anything this time. Tonight, he wanted to give you anything and everything you wanted. Tonight he wanted to prove something to you, even if it was just pretend.
Watching Jeonghan nod and move back to his knee, your eyes fall to his hands as he lets out a deep breath, working his belt open with shaky fingers. Sitting up, you listen to how Jeonghan’s breath changes when your hands take the place of his, your fingers steadily undoing his belt and his jeans, before you meet his eyes through lowered lashes.
Jeonghan can’t help but smile, a laugh escaping from his lips on an exhale in reaction to even the smallest action from you. There was no denying that he was turned on but there was more to it that even he couldn’t explain in a single night. Shaking his head, Jeonghan moves to his feet, his eyes still on yours, as you watch from the blanket as he sheds the last of his clothes before moving back to his knees and back into your touch.
Leaning his forehead against yours, Jeonghan groans, feeling the warmth of your body against his as he lays between your legs. Sliding your leg along his thigh, you rest your knee at his hip and run your fingers along his arm, enjoying the feeling of the weight of his body even as you ache for him between your thighs.
Furrowing his brows, Jeonghan licks his lips when he tries to move, his hand pushing against the blanket and you cling to him, keeping him close to you. Meeting your eyes, he finds a desperate look in your eyes that he knows he isn’t going to be able to resist even before you speak.
“Just…please? Fuck me, Jeonghan, please.”
He hadn’t prepped you and he hadn’t touched you since yesterday but he could feel how aroused you were as his cock rested between your legs. Groaning, Jeonghan starts to shake his head in a feeble attempt to argue with you and reason with you but when you lift your hips and rub your pussy against him, every thought in his mind is lost. Instead, Jeonghan whispers your name on your lips as you kiss him and beg him again with your hand cupping his jaw.
Nodding, Jeonghan reaches between the two of you, lining himself up with you and listening to your breath hitch as he pushes into your tight walls slowly until he bottoms out, his hips resting fully against yours. With one hand resting beside your head, Jeonghan grips your hip with the other hand, resting his forehead against yours as he stays still for a moment to catch his breath as you clench around him.
The stretch is familiar and yet without the prep, though you had begged him to skip it, you find yourself needing the moment to adjust. Jeonghan wasn’t too big but instead, it was as if his body was made for yours and he filled you perfectly. Once the initial pain of the stretch faded, only the feeling of euphoria and the need for him to move remained.
Lightly scratching your nails against the side of his neck, you swallow hard to catch your breath before nodding and lifting your hips as if trying to urge him without words. Jeonghan groans into a soft chuckle of your name that sounds like a plea for mercy before you swallow the sound with a kiss as your lips find his.
Furrowing his brows, Jeonghan rocks his hips towards yours, filling you once again deeply, causing you to moan into the kiss. Each thrust sends the knot in your stomach to tighten, pushing you towards the edge and your orgasm. The way that Jeonghan seems to know your body and how he finds just the right angle wordlessly, moaning his name as tears gather on the rims of your eyes, makes your head spin.
“Baby…”
The pet name whispered against your cheek so softly that the tears that had collected in your eyes fell on a soft sob as you wrapped your arm around Jeonghan’s neck. You pull him closer to you not wanting him to see you cry from something other than pleasure. Closing his eyes tightly as his lips rest against the crook of your neck, Jeonghan hisses out something intelligible that he is afraid you might hear or he might regret as he feels you tightening around him, your orgasm ripping through you. There were three small words that he had tried so hard to keep to himself that could mean nothing or everything.
With a few more uneven thrusts, Jeonghan follows you over that edge, quickly pulling out of you to cum on to your stomach with a labored, breathy groan, his eyes searching for yours as you avoid him. He could see the tears that had streamed down your face and across your temples into your hair but he wasn’t sure if they were good tears or not.
Reaching up to wipe his thumb under your eye, Jeonghan opens his mouth to speak but the words are hard to get out. There was so much he wished he could say to you if he weren’t so stupid and scared, so instead he shifted to his other hand and wiped the tears from your other eye before using his shirt to clean your stomach silently.
After a few moments, silence was deafening, and you felt like you were going to scream if one of you didn’t speak. It had never been this quiet after you and Jeonghan had fucked but then again, it had never felt like that before. Swallowing hard, you look up as Jeonghan finishes buttoning his shirt, your dress mostly covering your body.
“Jeong—”
“Y/N…”
Both of you stop speaking. Having spoken over one another, a smile lifts at both of your lips and Jeonghan shakes his head, leaning down to pick up his jacket before he moves to put it on you. Moving around you, he meets your eyes as he zips up the jacket before leaning to press a kiss to your lips and you feel your heart beat hard and fast like it’s going to burst or break. You aren’t sure which will happen first.
“Let’s get you to bed. It’s late and I’m sure Mingyu will call the cops if he wakes up and finds you missing from your bed.”
Nodding, you feel Jeonghan’s fingers slide against your hand before his fingers lace with yours and he leads you back towards the door and back to reality, where the two of you could stop playing pretend. You feel the tears once again prickling at your eyes. Sniffling, you will the tears back, at least until you are safe in bed and away from Jeonghan’s watchful eye.
Jihoon lifts his brows as you swirl the wine glass in front of you thoughtfully before taking a sip. You glance towards where Soonyoung is talking to a pretty lady showing him another bottle of wine before you once again frown into your glass. It wasn’t like you to be so quiet or to look so down.
You and Jihoon weren’t as close as some of the others in the group. In truth, you and Soonyoung were closer but over the years, everyone had grown up. Personalities had changed and around a year ago, you had found yourself picking up the phone to text or call Jihoon more often for advice or just to talk.
“Wanna join us for this wine tour, Y/N? You scheduled it.”
Looking up from your glass, you meet Jihoon’s eyes with a look of surprise and guilt. You knew you had been more distracted and distant all day but hearing it from Jihoon’s mouth snapped you back to reality.
“I’m sorry, Jihoon... just a lot on my mind.”
Nodding, Jihoon takes a sip of his wine, glancing towards Soonyoung, who seems oblivious to not only the conversation but any of the tension as he accepts a different glass of wine.
“I can tell. Maybe you need to just tell Jeonghan how you feel about him.”
With your own glass sitting against your lips, at Jihoon’s words, you choke on your wine, watching the man smile and take another sip as if he had just told you about the weather. The sound of your coughing is finally what draws Soonyoung back to you, concern on his face as he pats your back, leaning to look at you closely.
“You okay? Don’t drink it so fast.”
“She’s fine, Soonyoung.”
Nodding, you try to agree with Jihoon but Soonyoung takes the glass from your hand, leading you towards one of the empty tables, making Jihoon follow with a sigh.
“I’m okay, I promise.”
Gesturing his hand out towards you as if to say, I told you so, Jihoon takes the seat across from you as Soonyoung sits beside you, his brows finally relaxing.
“Okay… you wanna keep going?”
Jihoon watches you closely as you consider the question, your eyes falling to your phone in your hand. When you take longer than he feels necessary to answer, he purses his lips, leaning forward to rest his chin on his fist and looking towards Soonyoung, meeting his eyes. The two share a quick, silent conversation.
“I–I mean, yeah, course —”
“I think Jeonghan canceled his plans on Shua today too.”
Blinking a few times at Soonyoung’s words, you take a breath before leaning forward to rest your head in your hands. The warmth of Soonyoung’s hand running along your back is as soothing as it is humiliating as his words echo in your head.
“Y/N… It’s not a big deal.”
Scoffing, you sit up, sniffing back any emotion that has come to the surface, before you look at either of your friends with a shrug. You had been careful. Clearly, Jeonghan had been the one to fuck up but maybe you could still keep this a secret on your part.
“What? Why would I care what he’s doing today?”
Smirking, Jihoon lets out a breath that sounds more like a chuckle as he leans back in his chair, causing you to look in his direction. Meeting your eyes, the man lifts his hands in disbelief at your attempt to lie.
“Really? That’s how you are going to try to play this?”
The look on Jihoon’s face made you want to smack him but you tried to keep a look of indifference on yours. Sighing, Soonyoung just shakes his head, resting his arm on your chair behind your back, tilting his head towards you.
“You are dating him, aren’t you? I mean…kinda what it seems like. He’s all over you and if anyone even looks at you for too long, we get a death stare from him. Even Mingyu…” Smiling, Soonyoung lifts his hand from the chair to brush under his nose, amused as he speaks. “Especially Mingyu.”
Sighing as you lift, you reach for your wine, taking a sip of it and lifting your shoulders in mild defeat. Soonyoung wasn’t telling you anything you didn’t know. After last night and the state of your dress lying in your suitcase, hiding from Mingyu, you knew that Jeonghan had the wrong impression of your relationship with him—or he just didn’t want to understand it.
“It’s not my fault he can’t control his face. At least this isn’t my fault.”
Sharing another look with Soonyoung, Jihoon smiles at you before finally laughing as he looks down at his fingers around the stem of his wine glass.
“Uh, Y/N, you both fucked up if your goal was to keep your...” Furrowing his brows, Jihoon meets your eyes, looking for a bit of clarification, getting none before he continues. “Relationship, a secret.”
Now it was you who needed the clarification. You couldn’t think of a single time that you had been careless enough to make your relationship with Jeonghan as obvious as Jihoon was making it seem. Lifting your brows, you whine Jihoon’s name, making the man lower his head and nod before he continues with his explanation.
“About a month ago, you called me around like, fuck, two in the morning. You were wasted and I’m pretty sure you were hanging out at Cheol’s.” Sighing, Jihoon looks at Soonyoung as if looking for moral support as he continues. “You said something about wanting me to keep a secret about Jeonghan. No matter what I said, I couldn’t stop you, so you told me you were sleeping with him.”
There wasn’t enough wine or water in all of Paris to help the way that your mouth went dry at Jihoon’s words. You knew that you got drunk with Seungcheol on occasion and you also knew that there were a few times you couldn't remember the night before. You also knew there were nights you would see phone calls or texts to friends, mostly Jeonghan, that you couldn’t remember the next day, but never in your wildest dreams did you imagine you would do something like what Jihoon was recounting for you.
Wincing in embarrassment for you, Soonyoung watches you stare at your wine glass for a full minute before you slide your purse on to your shoulder and clear your throat.
“Uh… I’m so fucking sorry, Jihoon. I’m sorry to both of you. For today and for that night. Fuck…for any night that I have done anything stupid like that.”
When you start to stand up to leave, Soonyoung reaches out to take your hand with a frown on his face. You close your eyes, feeling his thumb press against your palm as he grounds you to the moment, his voice soothing you like his hand had rubbed your back moments before.
“No one is mad at you or upset. Honestly, not many others really know. Some of them assume something is up but personally, I just want you both to be happy. You clearly like each other.”
Closing your eyes, you swallow hard feeling tears that threaten to fall as they collect behind your lashes. It wasn’t that simple, but neither of your friends knew that. Shaking your head, you carefully pull your hand from Soonyoung’s.
“I’m just a phase, Soonie. I–I gotta go. Have a good day. Sorry…”
Barely meeting Jihoon’s eyes, you see him start to speak as you reach up to wipe away a tear as quickly as it falls before you slip past a group of people moving into the winery.
“Fuck.”
Nodding along with Soonyoung’s one word response to your exit, Jihoon sighs as you walk out of the door. He felt like he could have handled the situation better but he hoped you needed the push.
Watching Jeonghan from his bed, Joshua lifts his brow as Jeonghan sighs for the umpteenth time. They had plans to go on a walking tour, to see the Eiffel Tower, the Seine River, and maybe even get some food before the end of the day, but now Joshua was feeling like those plans were changing.
Lifting his hand to rub at his eyes, Jeonghan tries to push you from his mind and the tears he had seen on your cheeks as he had walked back to your room with you. He tried to forget the sad smile you had given him as you said goodnight and handed him back his jacket—the jacket he was thinking about putting on for the day. Now the jacket was lying on his bed, and he had stared at it, sighed at it, and walked away from it multiple times as his best friend watched thoughtfully.
“Did the jacket offend your family?”
Laughing into a breath, Jeonghan slides his hand down his face and over his lips as he shakes his head. He knew Joshua was trying to lighten the mood and make him laugh but he had no idea what was really going on. As far as Jeonghan knew, no one knew about his arrangement with you—well, besides Dokyeom but he was clearly just observant.
“Nah…just not sure I wanna wear it.”
Sighing, Joshua purses his lips as Jeonghan picks up the jacket and brings it to his nose, taking in a breath before shaking his head. Either he hadn’t washed the jacket in a long time or something else had happened with it that he wasn’t telling Joshua about, which only meant one thing.
“So, did you wanna tell me what's going on? This have anything to do with the texts I’m getting from Jihoon about how fucking depressed Y/N seems today?”
Furrowing his brows, Jeonghan looks down at the jacket in his hands. It smelled like you, not just your perfume but just you and he knew if he wore it today he would be even more lost in his head. Joshua’s words pull him back from his thoughts but only make him put up an instant facade as Jeonghan smiles and shakes his head.
“Huh? What do you mean? Is she, uh, she okay? Should I text her?” The facade starts to crack the moment he tries to talk about you; no matter how good of a liar Jeonghan could be when it came to you, it was becoming harder to pretend. Licking his lips, Jeonghan looks down and manages to continue what he was saying. “I’m not sure what I could say to help her, but I could check on her if you think I should.”
Laying his jacket across a chair, Jeonghan shakes his head at his own weakness, knowing he must look like an idiot. As Joshua just sighs and sits up on the bed. He knew that look even without actually seeing it. He had been best friends with Joshua Hong for nearly a decade; they were closer to brothers than friends at this point and if there was anyone that it was difficult to lie to, it was him.
“Stop. I’ve pretended not to notice because you two obviously wanted to keep it a secret but I know you better than almost anyone.” Tilting his head, Joshua watches Jeonghan scoff as he listens to him speak. “I thought you would just tell me when you were ready but something happened, so just fucking talk to me, man. I hate seeing you miserable. I don’t like seeing Y/N upset either.”
Reaching up to once again pinch the bridge of his nose like he is getting a headache, Jeonghan moves back to his bed, sitting down on it with a loud sigh. The sigh was one of defeat mixed with relief as he finally met Joshua’s eyes and nodded.
“I fucked up. I could have fucked anyone else and it wouldn’t have mattered but it’s been her.”
Joshua’s shoulders lift as he takes in a deep breath, getting confirmation of what he had assumed to be true. He knew things had been different for months but he also knew that even if Jeonghan hadn’t wanted to admit it to you or to most of the others, he had had a crush on you for years.
“Okay… So, like last night or?”
The question hangs in the air until Jeonghan tilts his head and winces out of embarrassment and anxiety. Joshua had known the answer to his own questions but that hadn’t stopped him from hoping this wasn’t as messy as it seemed. With the look on Jeonghan’s face, he knew it was a potential tangled web that could lead to the end of friendships.
“Shit–I..okay, I mean, I figured, but...”
Scoffing in disbelief, Jeonghan leans over his knees, putting his head in his hands. Had he been that obvious. He knew he had gotten a little jealous lately and maybe a bit more careless when it came to how he was acting towards Mingyu, but otherwise he felt like he wasn’t that transparent.
“I assume you aren’t dating.”
Shaking his head, still unable to meet Joshua’s eyes out of fear of what he will find in them, Jeonghan runs his fingers through his hair and closes his eyes.
“But you are, and correct me if I’m wrong here. You are in love with her.”
Fingers dig into his scalp hard as Joshua says the words out loud so flippantly. Narrowing his eyes, Joshua leans forward to watch Jeonghan as he processes what he had said before he sits up and slaps his hands down over his thighs with an unamused laugh.
“Because I’m an idiot.” Rolling his eyes, Jeonghan still avoids Joshua’s as his voice wavers even slightly. “You know we came up with rules? I came up with most of them when we decided to do this.” Pushing his thumbs into the meat of his thighs, Jeonghan lets out an unamused laugh as he seems to bask in his stupidity and the levity of the situation. “All because I wanted her to agree to sleeping with me because I thought that was the only way I’d get her to be with me.”
While Joshua could see how, where, and why the arrangement came to be, it still made him sad as he watched his best friend breakdown. He had never been in a similar situation and he didn’t think of you in the same way, but he did see how Jeonghan looked at you.
“Why would that be the only way? Why didn’t you just ask her out?” Scoffing, Joshua gestures towards his friend as if trying to get him to see reason as he speaks, his voice kind but firm. “Why don’t you ask her out now?”
Now Joshua was being ridiculous. He knew his best friend was intelligent—perhaps one of his smartest friends—but that idea sounded akin to driving his car into the ocean. Jeonghan wasn’t sure what he would do if he knew for sure that you didn’t care about him in the same way.
“And risk losing one of my best friends? Are you fucking insane? She doesn’t like me like that, Shua.”
Standing up, Jeonghan starts to pace. The weight of Joshua’s eyes is heavy but somehow it is still a comfort, even when he knows that he is frustrated with him. Narrowing his eyes, Joshua looks away from Jeonghan after a moment to look at his phone, seeing a text message from his group chat with Jihoon and Soonyoung. Lifting the phone from the bed, he scoffs under his breath, glancing towards the man in front of him as Jeonghan gnaws at his thumbnail, lost in thought.
"Clearly, she does. Jihoon said she’s not going to make it through the wine tour with them.” Glancing back down at his phone, Joshua texts back as he speaks quietly, knowing Jeonghan is still paying attention to him. “And I know we aren’t going out. You two need to fucking talk.”
Jeonghan’s mouth starts to open, only to close when he meets Joshua’s eyes as he looks over his phone. He knew it wasn’t a suggestion but the idea of it was terrifying.
“Figure it out, Jeonghan. Don’t throw away your friendship and the potential of something else over your pride.”
Sliding off the bed to stand up, Joshua pats Jeonghan on the shoulder, making sure to meet his eyes and see some understanding behind them before heading to the door.
You hadn’t necessarily needed a shower after your failed trip to the winery, but the hot water running over your face and body felt good and it had washed away your tears. The only unfortunate thing was that it only lasted as long as you stayed in the shower and as you sat on your bed, skin still slightly damp under loose clothes, you felt the weight of everything pushing back down on you.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. There had been rules to stop any of this pain and yet from the first time that you and Jeonghan had slept together, there had been pain. You had known then that you should have stopped but you didn’t want to. You didn’t want to stop that time or any other time after it, not even last night, as your heart felt like it was breaking into two. It was only the day after you felt like the most idiotic person on the face of the planet, thinking you could have more with someone who didn’t love you back, that you regretted it all.
Maybe it was time to end it.
Leaning to pick up your cell phone, you stare at Jeonghan’s name for a moment before pressing your thumb down over his name and putting the phone to your ear, listening to it try to connect. Closing your eyes, you take a breath, only to furrow your brows a moment later when you hear his ring tone as if it's just outside of your door.
“Hey, let me in, please.”
His voice was quiet but you could still hear him from two places, your phone and on the other side of the door. Taking a breath, you look at your phone, hearing the sound of a phone call ending knowing that he is waiting for you to open the door.
It was a simple task. Get up, unlock the door, open it, and greet Jeonghan, but as you looked at the door, knowing he was on the other side after everything that had already happened today and after what had happened last night it felt like you were preparing to scale Mount Everest.
With one last deep breath, you move to your feet, take the few steps that feel like miles to the door and open it to meet Jeonghan’s eyes. You weren’t sure what you had expected to see when you saw him. Perhaps you had expected the usual with him—his handsome face and cocky smirk on his face but instead you were met with a solemn look and dark circles from a restless night.
“I just… can we talk?”
Nodding, you step to the side, letting Jeonghan move past you into the room as he pushes his hands into his jean pockets, only to take them out again out of nerves. Jeonghan had always been one of the most confident people you had known but today looking at him, you were seeing a different man.
You were seeing the man that you saw late at night when he buried his face against your neck and muttered sweetly about it being the best place on earth. You were seeing the man who made you cry after those moments when he wouldn’t call you until three days later, seemingly just disappearing. This was the man who kept you on an emotional rollercoaster.
“Yeah…I think we need to. I have something I wanna talk to you about too.”
Closing his eyes for a few seconds, Jeonghan feels his heart in his throat before he tries to put on a facade, not knowing that it’s cracked, when he turns to look at you, offering you a sad smile.
“Yeah? You…you–uh, wanna go first then?”
Maybe after what Joshua had told him, he didn’t have to be the first one to say it. The words were so terrifying to him. Those words made him feel like you were going to run away from him and losing you as a friend and a lover was enough to make him feel like his chest was going to explode.
Shaking your head, you lift your brows, offering Jeonghan an unamused laugh as you move back towards your bed to sit down, pulling your legs up to criss-cross them under you. Watching him move towards you, Jeonghan pauses to meet your eyes before he sits down apprehensively beside you.
“Sure… I’ve been thinking and I love – “ The words get caught in your throat but Jeonghan hears the word love, causing him to sit up, only for his heart to pound in his ears as you keep speaking. “Loved the sex but I don’t think I can do it anymore. You–We said we could call it off at any time.”
The words make sense to Jeonghan but it is like he is in a tunnel where the wind is too loud for him to actually pick up on the sound of your voice as he stares at you, seeing your lips moving. You were asking to stop. You wanted to end it. That wasn’t what he thought you were going to say even if it made sense with the look he had seen in your eyes last night and with what Joshua had said earlier.
“Jeonghan? You—I mean… It's nothing serious. That’s what you said. You’ve made that very clear, several times.”
A smile pulls at Jeonghan’s lips before he laughs but you can tell he isn’t happy and nothing is funny. You know Jeonghan well enough to know when he is deflecting and when he is in pain. Shaking his head, Jeonghan looks down at his hands before closing his eyes, muttering to himself something you can’t quite make out.
“What? You were too quiet, I couldn’t –”
“I just said—I said I’m stupid.”
Neither of you move; the room is silent as you watch with furrowed brows as Jeonghan reaches up to wipe under his eye, keeping his face hidden with his dark hair. You had seen Jeonghan cry before over serious things but something like this—the loss of a meaningless relationship—wasn't something you thought he would be upset over. You, on the other hand, felt like you were breaking as you watched the man you loved be upset, feeling like you couldn’t do anything to help him.
“Don’t say that about yourself. You’ve done nothing –”
Scoffing, Jeonghan glances at you, making you pause when you see the disappointment on his face. Sitting up, he turns towards you, starting to reach for your hand. He stops short, closing his hand into a loose fist and resting it on your knee.
“I have done everything wrong, so I know you want to be nice and tell me to be kinder to myself but, Y/N, I’m so fucking stupid. Is it not painfully obvious that I am in love with you?”
You look at Jeonghan with the same expression as you would a complex piece of literature. It was as if he had just tried to explain your feelings back to you, making you feel exposed to the sun. Shaking your head, you try to come up with the right words, only to let out a soft exhale of Jeonghan’s name, looking away.
Finally scooting closer to take your hand in his, Jeonghan feels the hole in the pit of his stomach struggling to fill as he tries to salvage what he feels like he has ruined. Lifting his other hand, Jeonghan timidly dares to run his fingers along your jaw, turning your face towards him so he can meet your eyes once again.
“I told you yesterday that I don’t deserve this... I don’t deserve you and I meant it, but baby, I love you so fucking much.” Swallowing down his emotion, Jeonghan licks his lips as he searches your eyes, trying to gauge your reaction, his hand trembling against your neck. “I’m sorry. I’m really sorry that I did it like this. I told you, I’m stupid.”
It wasn’t fair; none of this was fair. It wasn’t fair that you felt like melting into Jeonghan’s touch or that you wanted to run away from him. It didn’t feel real and you had never imagined that Yoon Jeonghan would fall in love with you. You were just his stupid friend that he happened to be attracted to, but now he was telling you that everything you felt, he felt too.
“What the hell, Jeonghan?”
Your voice causes Jeonghan’s eyes to close; that whine in your voice sounds like the rejection that he was so terrified of. You look over his handsome face, feeling his hand fall from your neck when you make the leap, leaning forward to brush your lips against his.
Jeonghan gasps at the feeling, his hand reaching back out, holding the back of your neck and pulling you in closer, your lips firmly against his as he furrows his brows. He knew that if you actually wanted him to let you go, he would. He would give you anything you wanted. He would have given you anything from day one if he hadn’t been so afraid.
Resting his forehead against yours, Jeonghan listens to your soft breaths, your hands now clinging to the front of his shirt as if to keep him close to you. You hadn’t said anything back but right now he wasn’t sure he even needed you to; he just needed to know that you wanted him and you didn’t want him to leave.
Lips brush against your cheek before Jeonghan whispers your name like a question, sitting back to look at you, searching for his answer. A nod and look of desperation in your eyes is enough for him to pull you into his lap and have his lips back on yours as his hands roamed your back under your shirt, feeling your skin under his fingers.
Whining his name once again, you run your fingers through Jeonghan’s hair as you arch your chest against his, feeling chill bumps erupt along your skin at his touch. There was nothing that you wanted more than that feeling, the feeling of his hands on your body and his lips on your skin.
Whispering “please,” you meet Jeonghan’s eyes as he groans, feeling you roll your hips over his. This hadn’t been his plan but he wasn’t going to deny you. He could feel his cock starting to get hard with every gentle grind of your hips over him and you were driving him crazy while making him fall in love with you all over again as he stared up at you.
“I’ll give you whatever you want—everything—anything; just ask for it.”
Moving to your knees, you rest your hands on Jeonghan’s shoulders, tilting your head to press your lips to his once more before speaking against them as you feel his hands rest under your ass.
“Make love to me then, that’s what I want.”
A breathy moan escapes from between your lips when Jeonghan lays you on your back and hovers over you, brushing his thumb across your cheek while admiring you. He had looked at you before but now he was wondering if he had ever really looked at you. He was noticing little things about the color of your eyes, freckles on your face, and how his heart was beating so hard.
“I love you.”
He had told you that he was in love with you but it was different hearing him say it that way and while he was looking at you like this. It felt real. Closing your eyes you feel the familiar tears start to well up in your eyes causing you to fight them as you reach up to hold Jeonghan’s wrist in case he were to change his mind.
When tears do finally run from the corners of your eyes along your temples, Jeonghan takes a deep breath leaning to rest his forehead against yours letting you cling to him. He knew now that the tears last night were sad like he had feared. Making a silent promise to himself to make up for it, Jeonghan kisses you gently, his thumb brushing away some of your tears as he speaks against your lips quietly.
“I love you, Y/N.”
You nod, nudging your nose against Jeonghan’s as your hands move to find the end of his shirt, working it up his torso. You feel the way his stomach tightens under your fingers when he takes a deep breath before sitting back to let you pull his shirt over his head.
The fabric falls from your fingers onto the bed, your eyes moving from Jeonghan’s face over his chest and down his stomach to where your fingers rest on the top of his jeans. Taking a deep breath, Jeonghan leans his head back to the feeling of your gentle touch and the much needed relief as you work the zipper of his jeans down.
“Fuck…Let me take care of you this time. Please?”
Meeting your eyes, Jeonghan is happy to see the way you bite at your lips, your pretty smile pulling at the corner of your lips as you tilt your head on the bed to look at him almost innocently. Nodding, you lift your hips, letting Jeonghan shimmy your shorts down your legs. Licking his lips, Jeonghan kicks his jeans and boxers away. His eyes stay fixed on you, studying you as if you were a piece of art to be admired.
“I love every part of this and if you want me to make love to you, let me do it right.”
Arching your back, you let Jeonghan slide your shirt up and over your head. He was once again really looking at you as he moved back on to the bed and between your legs. You were bare in front of him and everything about you was perfect as he studied your body. He took note of every single mole and even the smallest of scars, stopping to kiss them on the way to lying between your thighs.
Warm breath causes you to close your eyes and push your head back against the pillow. The first brush of Jeonghan’s tongue between your folds allows the tip of it to tease your clit, make your toes curl and gasp his name.
Getting a taste of you had never been enough for Jeonghan and this time he was going to enjoy it as if it were the last time, just in case it was. He wanted you to remember the way his name felt on your lips. He wanted you to remember how his mouth felt between your legs and how his fingers felt buried deep inside you as he curled them back towards your stomach, making you arch off the bed.
You gasp for a breath between moans. Reaching between your legs, you thread your fingers in Jeonghan’s hair as you push your hips towards his mouth, hearing him groan against your folds. He knew you inside and out and yet he had never made you cum so hard and so fast before.
“Oh my god, Jeonghan, I can’t—ah!”
Using his thumb to rub circles against your clit, Jeonghan watches you lift your hips, searching for your second orgasm, as he licks your cum from his lips. When you fall apart for a second time on his fingers, Jeonghan furrows his brows, cursing under his breath at the sight. There were few things on Earth that were that beautiful.
Fingers carefully slip from you, making you whine at how empty you suddenly feel but once you glance at Jeonghan resting between your legs, sucking his fingers clean, you moan, lifting your hand to cover your face. He was such a handsome man and he was doing something that seemed so dirty.
Smiling, Jeonghan tilts his head while watching you cover your face. He loved that no matter how much dirty shit had come out of your mouth in the past or how much the two of you had done, you always seemed so innocent. You were perfect in his eyes.
Carefully pulling your hand from your face, Jeonghan presses his lips to your knuckles, looking down at you. You can’t help but notice the way your body heats up at the simple action and the way your heart tightens seeing him smile against your fingers.
“You are so beautiful; don’t hide.”
Pressing your lips together, you can only see Jeonghan’s gaze as he moves your hand back to the bed beside your head, his thumb pressing to your palm gently before he lets go completely. You were used to Jeonghan being more rushed with you. Not necessarily rough but you both knew what you liked in bed and it wasn’t that he was treating you like he was now; it wasn’t something you didn’t like; it had just never been on the table. How he was treating you now was intimate; he was treating you like a man in love, like he said he was.
Brushing his lips against yours, Jeonghan smiles, feeling you do the same. He didn’t think there was a need to rush anything, especially if he was going to treat this like it might be the last time. You hadn’t told him how you felt and though he was hopeful, he wasn’t going to put words in your mouth.
You moan softly against Jeonghan’s lips. The tip of his cock nudges against your entrance as his hand runs along your outer thigh to your knee and Jeonghan urges your leg up towards his hip. With his free hand, Jeonghan holds himself steady even as he groans on your lips, feeling your warm, wet walls pull him in and clench around his cock.
Wrapping your leg around Jeonghan’s back, you let your head fall back, his thumb pressing against your skin just under your knee as he thrusts into you slowly and deeply. Pulling him in closer with your leg wrapped around him, you whisper Jeonghan’s name when he doesn’t start moving immediately. You knew that he liked to let you adjust but your desire for him was outweighing anything else.
Nodding, Jeonghan moves his hand from your leg to cup your cheek, resting his forehead against yours as he rocks his hips to meet yours in a smooth, deep thrust that makes you moan out a sound similar to a sob. Jeonghan could tell the difference now as tears started to fall from your eyes, these tears were from pleasure and not because you were sad. These tears he would want to see any day of the week. Jeonghan would die to hear you sob his name as you clenched around his cock and begged him so sweetly not to stop.
“I’m not, baby… you are so fucking perfect. Holy shit, I know I —” Groaning as he feels you clench hard around him, Jeonghan pauses to take a breath before burying himself inside of you as deep as possible feeling your thigh tremble as it rests against his side. “I know I’ve said it a few times now…but I love you. Fuck, I love you, not just this but you. Need you to understand that.”
Your fingers scratch as Jeonghan’s shoulders as you feel the pressure building and the cord winding tighter and tighter as he pushes you towards another orgasm. It’s only his words that keep you grounded and make you whimper his name as you pull his mouth to yours to make him stop talking when you fall apart for him once again.
Trying to breathe into your kiss, Jeonghan furrows his brows tightly, feeling the way your pussy hugs him and then tightens around him like a vice when you cum around him. His thrusts slow only for a moment before becoming harder and filled with even more purpose as Jeonghan starts to chase his own release.
A choke groan gets caught in his throat when Jeonghan cums, filling you with each one of his thrusts. Your fingers dig into his shoulder and bicep, leaving half-moon divots to mark where you have been as he pushes you towards the headboard with each deep thrust.
Soft lips walk across your throat and up to your jaw before finally making their way to your lips, pulling you back to reality. Jeonghan listens to your small whine when he slips from you once again, leaving you empty. Your arms and legs felt like they were being held up by strings until they were finally on the mattress and you found it hard to make them move again, causing you to pout and Jeonghan to laugh softly against your lips at your reaction to how tired you are.
“Tired, baby?”
You nod, leaning your head into Jeonghan’s palm as he brushes his hand over the side of your head and over your hair. Even with your eyes closed, you could feel his eyes searching your face for answers and you knew it was the one he was looking for. You hadn’t been ready to give it to him at first but the more you lay in his arms and even considered anything different, the more your heart told you that you already knew.
“I love you, Jeonghan.”
Finally hearing you tell him that you love him, Jeonghan closes his eyes and leans forward to rest his face against the crook of your neck with a sigh. You can almost feel the weight lift from him as he nods against your skin, placing a kiss on your neck before muttering quietly against the column of your neck.
“I love you, too.”
With his headphones half on his head, Mingyu stands in the doorway of his shared hotel room only for a moment before groaning and lifting his hand to cover his eyes at the sight in front of him. He had assumed that you and Jeonghan were together and after talking to Dokyeom, he knew even more—he knew more of the drama behind it—but clearly, that was hopefully a thing of the past.
He just hadn’t wanted to be privy to it.
Glancing towards the door and hearing the sound of a groan, you smack Jeonghan’s shoulder, causing him to look in the direction of your shocked face. Nothing of what had happened had been the plan, or else he would have told Dokyeom to keep Mingyu out of the room.
“Gyu! Can you go? I am trying to do something here if you don’t —”
"Literally, stop talking to me while you are naked. I’m gonna go stay in Dokyeom’s room.”
You watch the door close, hearing the lock click in place, before meeting Jeonghan’s eyes, who shakes his head like Mingyu has done something wrong.
“He didn’t know. Why are you mad at him? This is his room, Jeonghan.”
Jeonghan silences you with a kiss making you sigh against his lips as he speaks between kisses.
“I’m not mad.” Seeing you smile, Jeonghan kisses you softly once more before cautiously adding, “I just didn’t want him to interrupt my first time actually getting to fuck my girlfriend. Is that so wrong of me?”
Narrowing your eyes, you feel your cheeks burn at Jeonghan’s choice of wording but you still can’t keep the smile off your face, feeling his fingers running along your stomach as he moves to lay beside you, pulling you into his arms.
“Oh? Is that what happened? Is that who I am?”
Jeonghan nods, wrapping his arm tightly around you, pulling you on your side to face him so his fingers can draw small circles on the small of your back as he looks into your eyes.
“I fucking hope so.”
Sitting on Dokyeom’s bed, Mingyu stares at the wall while Dokyeom stares at him, wondering what happened, until finally his friend looks at him and shudders in a full body cringe.
“They were naked and possibly—you know. I will never be the same.”
Making a face, Dokyeom pats Mingyu on the back before tilting his head and shrugging.
“Well, it’s about damn time but better you see it than me.”
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#jeonghan smut#seventeen smut#svthub#svt smut#jeonghan angst#seventeen angst#svt angst#jeonghan fluff#seventeen fluff#jeonghan romance#seventeen romance#jeonghan comedy#seventeen comedy#seventeen
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⛄ snowman - c. seungcheol ☃
choi seungcheol x gn!reader
december with seventeen ! 1/13 tags: seungcheol x reader, seungcheol fluff, seventeen fanfiction, holiday au, snowman au, christmas love story, domestic fluff, bittersweet love, long distance relationship, happy ending, romance, reader insert, cozy vibes genre: fluff, romance, holiday au, slice of life warnings: mild emotional moments (bittersweet themes around distance), excessive cuteness and fluff (reader discretion advised), no major angst (just warm feelings and happy tears) wc: 2757 (heh) a/n: 1/13 ! twelve to go woohooo. PLAY SNOWMAN BY SIA RN !!
the snow is already falling. you reached your hand out to catch one of the snowflakes, watching it melt the moment it landed on your skin. a soft smile crept on your lips, but it didn’t quite reach your eyes. the snow melted quickly, just like the time you had left before everything changed.
your boyfriend’s warmth came suddenly, pulling you out of your thoughts as his arms wrapped around your waist from behind. he caught you mid-stumble, chuckling at your surprised squeal.
“careful, baby. don’t fall for me too hard,” seungcheol teased, his deep voice rumbling close to your ear. his tone was playful, but the weight of your reality lingered in the air. still, his laughter was contagious, and soon, the sound of your giggles filled the quiet winter evening.
you turned in his arms, pressing your cheek against his chest as the snow continued to fall around you. “snow’s already starting,” you murmured, your voice soft and wistful.
seungcheol hummed in agreement, his lips brushing against your forehead in a kiss. “i can see that,” he said, holding you just a little tighter. but his eyes searched your face, catching the sadness behind your small smile.
he wasn’t one to let the mood linger in shadows. “hey,” he started, his tone light and coaxing, “what do you say we celebrate? movies all night, wine, and cuddles. sound good?” his hands found yours, giving them a gentle squeeze.
“deal,” you replied, a grin breaking through the melancholy. together, you walked back home, his hand warm and steady in yours. yet, even as you gripped it tightly, the words you’d been holding back slipped out.
“maybe… maybe i don’t have to go,” you muttered, the uncertainty in your voice making your steps falter. it was loud enough for him to hear, and it made him pause.
seungcheol stopped walking, turning to face you fully. “and miss the opportunity to catch your dreams? that’s a big no, darling,” he replied, his voice steady, soothing. but the way his thumb brushed over the back of your hand betrayed how much he was struggling with the thought, too.
“i would choose you over and over again. please. let me stay, hm?” your voice cracked slightly, your eyes searching his for any sign that he might agree. but his expression softened in that way only seungcheol’s could – full of love, patience, and resolve.
he stepped closer, leaning his forehead against yours. “come on, baby, it’s not even christmas yet. don’t be stubborn, please?” his tone was tender, his words coaxing.
you sighed, nodding reluctantly as he smiled and pulled you along. the two of you walked the rest of the way home, hands tightly clasped together.
the next morning arrived in a blur. you woke up entangled in seungcheol’s arms, his warmth still clinging to you from the night before. the soft rise and fall of his chest against your cheek was comforting, almost enough to make you forget the weight of the coming days.
slowly, you untangled yourself, careful not to wake him. padding out to the living room, you were greeted by the remnants of your impromptu celebration: empty wine bottles, leftover chips, and a blanket draped messily over the couch. the memories of last night’s laughter and whispered conversations brought a bittersweet smile to your face.
you moved quietly, tidying up the space and starting on breakfast. the smell of coffee and the soft sizzle of eggs eventually stirred seungcheol from his sleep.
“y/n?” his groggy voice called out, moments before he appeared in the doorway, his hair sticking out in every direction. his oversized sweater hung loosely on his frame, and the sight made your heart ache in the best way.
“morning, sleepyhead,” you greeted, a small laugh escaping as he shuffled over to you, wrapping his arms around your waist once more. “you should’ve stayed in bed.”
“hard to do when you’re not there,” he murmured against your shoulder, pressing a soft kiss there. “what are you making?”
“just breakfast,” you replied. “go sit down. i’ll bring it to you.”
“no way. i’m helping,” he declared, already reaching for a plate to set the table.
the two of you moved around the kitchen with ease, stealing glances and soft smiles. it felt normal, like any other day. but the knowledge that christmas was just around the corner, and with it your impending departure, lingered like an unspoken truth between you.
still, for now, you allowed yourself to bask in the warmth of seungcheol’s presence, the sound of his laughter, and the feel of his hand brushing against yours. it wasn’t christmas yet, and you were determined to make every moment count.
later that afternoon, you and seungcheol bundled up and braved the snow-covered streets for some last-minute christmas shopping. the city was alive with holiday cheer, the streets lined with twinkling lights and wreaths hanging from lampposts. seungcheol carried most of the bags, grumbling good-naturedly about how you’d overpacked your list—again.
“seriously, baby. why do you need five different kinds of wrapping paper?” he asked, exasperated but unable to hide the fond smile tugging at his lips.
“you’ll thank me when the gifts look cute under the tree,” you shot back, sticking your tongue out at him.
eventually, the two of you made it back home, arms laden with bags and cheeks flushed from the cold. after unloading everything, you both dove into the kitchen to start preparing for christmas eve dinner. the cozy space filled with the aroma of roasted vegetables, cinnamon, and freshly baked cookies.
seungcheol kept stealing bites of cookie dough until you smacked his hand away. “don’t think i don’t see you,” you scolded, laughing as he tried (and failed) to look innocent.
“quality control,” he defended, grinning as he wrapped an arm around your waist and kissed your temple.
as the sun set and the first stars began to peek through the frosty sky, you and seungcheol stepped outside to your backyard. the snow was untouched, pristine under the soft glow of the fairy lights you’d strung up weeks ago.
“ready?” he asked, holding up a pair of mismatched gloves for you.
you nodded, and together, you began building your annual snowman. it was a tradition that had started long before the two of you were a couple, back when you were just friends. this year, though, it felt heavier, the knowledge of your impending goodbye looming over the lighthearted activity.
when the snowman was finally complete, seungcheol stepped back, brushing snow off his gloves as he admired your handiwork. “not bad. might be our best one yet,” he said, his voice tinged with pride.
you stood beside him, arms wrapped around yourself for warmth as you gazed at the snowman. “maybe it’ll last until i…” you trailed off, the words catching in your throat.
seungcheol turned to you, his expression softening. “hey,” he said gently, reaching out to tilt your chin up so you’d meet his eyes. “it’s not goodbye forever. i’ll visit. every winter, okay? we’ll build a new snowman together, just like this.”
you nodded, tears stinging your eyes as he pulled you into his arms. the snowman stood silently behind you, its button eyes watching as you held onto each other.
months passed, and the snow melted, just as you’d feared. the distance was hard, the ache of being apart tempered only by seungcheol’s constant messages and late-night calls. but true to his word, he promised to visit every winter. the snowman—though long gone—had become a quiet promise, its memory etched into both your hearts.
now, it was a year later, and the city was alive with the bustle of the holiday season. christmas lights blinked cheerfully in shop windows, and the streets were alive with the sound of carolers and laughter. but for you, something felt missing. the new life you’d built was exciting but lacked the warmth of seungcheol’s presence.
you walked through the snow-dusted streets, your scarf wrapped tightly around your neck to ward off the cold. your hands carried a small gift bag, the contents carefully chosen with him in mind. though you’d planned to send it by mail, the thought of another christmas without him made your chest ache.
you turned the corner toward your apartment building, lost in thought, when a familiar voice called out to you.
“y/n!”
your heart stopped. you froze mid-step, your eyes darting around until they landed on him. there he was—bundled in a thick coat, cheeks flushed from the cold, and a grin that could rival the sun. seungcheol.
“what…” you breathed, your voice barely above a whisper as he jogged toward you. “what are you doing here?”
he stopped in front of you, slightly out of breath, but his smile never faltered. “visiting, of course. i told you, didn’t i? every winter.”
“but… how?” you stammered, your mind still reeling. “you didn’t even tell me you were coming!”
“it’s called a surprise,” he teased, his eyes crinkling with amusement. then, his tone softened, and he reached out to brush a stray snowflake from your hair. “i missed you, y/n. i couldn’t wait any longer.”
tears pricked your eyes as you threw your arms around him, the gift bag slipping to the ground. he laughed, the sound warm and familiar as he held you close. “i missed you too, cheol,” you whispered against his shoulder.
after a long moment, he pulled back just enough to look at you. “come on,” he said, bending down to pick up the forgotten bag. “let’s go inside before we freeze out here.”
once inside your apartment, the two of you settled on the couch, a blanket draped over your legs and mugs of hot cocoa in your hands. the warmth of his presence filled the room, chasing away the loneliness that had lingered in his absence.
“so, what’s this?” seungcheol asked, holding up the gift bag you’d dropped earlier.
you smiled shyly, setting your mug down. “it’s for you. go ahead, open it.”
he pulled out the small box inside, his brows furrowing in curiosity as he unwrapped it. inside was a delicate snowman figurine, hand-painted with care. on its base, you’d inscribed the words: “every winter, always.”
seungcheol’s fingers traced the inscription, his expression softening. “y/n…”
“i know it’s cheesy,” you said quickly, your cheeks heating. “but it reminded me of us. fragile and fleeting, but magical while it lasts.”
he set the figurine down carefully before pulling you into his arms again. “it’s perfect,” he murmured against your hair. “just like you.”
“your turn,” you said, pulling back with a playful grin. “i’m sure you didn’t show up empty-handed, right?”
he laughed, reaching into his coat pocket to pull out a small velvet box. your breath hitched as he opened it to reveal a delicate bracelet, its charms glinting in the soft light. each charm was shaped like a snowflake, unique and beautiful in its own way.
“seungcheol…” you whispered, your fingers brushing over the bracelet. “it’s beautiful.”
“just like every moment with you,” he said, fastening it around your wrist. “and just like snowflakes, no two moments are the same. but they’re all worth cherishing.”
the rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, stories, and quiet moments where words weren’t needed. as the snow fell outside, you knew that this christmas—and every one after—would be filled with the kind of magic only seungcheol could bring.
soft, glowing fairy lights reflected on the fresh snow as the night blanketed the world in tranquility. seungcheol stood at the window, the corner of his lips tugging upward as he watched you outside, your breath puffing into the chilly air as you diligently worked on the snowman. the sight was familiar, yet it never failed to warm him.
he reached for his scarf—a thick, knit one you had gifted him last christmas—and wrapped it around his neck before stepping out into the cold. you were bent over, adjusting the snowman’s stick arms when his voice broke through the stillness.
“shouldn’t you have an assistant for this?” he teased, his grin widening when you jumped slightly.
“and what took you so long, mister?” you shot back, standing upright with a playful glare. “if this snowman ends up looking like a disaster, it’s your fault.”
seungcheol laughed, his breath visible in the icy air. “i’ll take that responsibility,” he replied, stepping closer and unraveling his scarf. before you could protest, he looped it around your neck, pulling it snug. “you’ll get cold.”
“and now you’ll get cold too,” you muttered, though your cheeks flushed at the gesture.
he waved it off, already crouching to help you roll a fresh ball of snow. the two of you worked in harmony, the occasional burst of laughter echoing as you teased each other. when it came time to lift the snowman’s head onto its body, seungcheol took charge.
“got it,” he said confidently, hoisting the snowball up. but as he adjusted it, a bit of snow tumbled down and hit him square in the face.
you couldn’t hold back your laughter, doubling over as he sputtered and brushed the snow off his nose. “that’s what you get for being cocky,” you teased.
“oh, you’re in trouble now,” he warned, playfully lunging toward you. you shrieked, dodging him as you ran across the yard, the two of you slipping and sliding on the icy ground.
when you finally called a truce, both of you were breathless and grinning, cheeks red from the cold. you returned to the snowman, finishing it off with a carrot nose, pebble eyes, and a lopsided hat that seungcheol claimed gave it “character.”
“what should we name it?” you asked, stepping back to admire your handiwork.
seungcheol tilted his head thoughtfully. “what about… cheolman?” he suggested, his eyes sparkling with mischief.
“you did not just…” you groaned, though you couldn’t hide your smile. “fine. cheolman it is.”
the two of you stood there for a moment, side by side, as the snow continued to fall gently around you. the world felt quiet, like it was just the two of you and cheolman in your little bubble of peace.
then, under the glow of a nearby streetlamp, seungcheol’s voice broke the silence.
“y/n,” he began softly, turning to face you. his eyes searched yours, warm and earnest. “you know, i’ve always been… cautious about love. worried that it’s temporary, that it’ll melt away when things get hard. but being with you… it’s like building this snowman. it’s fragile and fleeting, sure, but it’s magical while it lasts. and i think that’s what makes it so beautiful.”
tears pricked at your eyes as his words sank in. “seungcheol…” you whispered, your voice trembling.
he stepped closer, brushing a thumb gently across your cheek to wipe away a stray snowflake—or was it a tear? “but here’s the thing,” he continued, his voice steady. “just because it melts doesn’t mean it’s gone. we can always build another one. and another. as many as it takes.”
you didn’t reply, instead wrapping your arms around him and burying your face in his chest. his arms came around you instantly, holding you tightly as if to shield you from the world.
“next year,” he murmured, his lips brushing the top of your head, “i’ll come to you. wherever you are. and we’ll build another snowman together.”
the months that followed were hard. the snow melted, and with it, your time together. but seungcheol kept his promise, his calls and messages filling the void of distance.
then, one day, as the first snow of the season began to fall, you heard a familiar knock at your door.
when you opened it, there he was, standing on your doorstep with snowflakes in his hair and a grin that made your heart skip a beat.
“promise kept,” he said simply, holding up a small box wrapped in glittering paper.
as you stepped aside to let him in, something above the door caught your eye—a sprig of mistletoe swaying gently in the cold breeze.
seungcheol noticed it too, his grin softening into something more tender. “looks like fate has good timing,” he murmured, stepping closer.
your breath hitched as he cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing over your skin with a warmth that melted the winter chill. “may i?” he whispered, his eyes searching yours for permission.
with a soft nod, you closed the distance, his lips meeting yours in a kiss that was both gentle and full of unspoken promises. the world seemed to fade away, leaving only the two of you standing there under the mistletoe, wrapped in the magic of the moment.
when you finally pulled away, his forehead rested against yours, a smile playing on his lips. “i think this might be my favorite tradition yet,” he said softly, his voice filled with quiet joy.
“mine too,” you whispered, fingers curling into the fabric of his coat as the snow continued to fall around you, blanketing the world in a fresh layer of magic.
december with seventeen ! - masterlist
#seventeen#svthub#seventeen ff#kstrucknet#seventeen fanfic#seventeen x reader#seventeen seungcheol#svt seungcheol#choi seungcheol x reader#choi seungcheol#seungcheol x reader#scoups#svt scoups#svt#scoups x reader#svt x reader#seventeen fic#seventeen fluff#seventeen drabbles#seventeen x you#svt imagines#seungcheol imagines#seungcheol fluff#scoups imagines#seventeen imagines#seungcheol drabbles#christmas seventeen#⋈ꕤଘ⋆๑⋈𓂅⋆-𓍼⌗ᯅ#°★ 🎀 𝒽🍬𝓃𝑒𝓎𝒽𝒶𝑒 𝓈𝓋𝓉 🎀 ★°#☆*: .。.ᓚᘏᗢ.。.:*☆~°★ 🎀 𝒽🍬𝓃𝑒𝓎𝒽𝒶𝑒-𝓈𝓋𝓉 🎀 ★°
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