#wish people could be more respectful about how they tell people they're wrong and about how they talk about what happened.

[dalennaugw]

Seeing people leaving some of the social spaces around here, at this time, is making the pit of my stomach feel like it's falling out.

[siddyyyyyyyy]

You're Only Sixteen

wc: ~3.8k

summary: child soldier joins task force141, stuff is complicated

warnings: violence, brief discussion of child soldiers

a/n: got this idea from somewhere, it marinated in my drafts for about half a year lol; second part

Waiting at the back of the base, Ghost is leaning against the building, waiting on the new addition to the Task Force. As if they even need one. Price sent him to meet the recruit, telling him the new asset should be highly trained and good for the team. Maybe he's right, but five people on the team seem too much for Ghost. Whatever criticism he has, they don't matter now since Price got you into the team anyway, meaning there's no going back unless you manage to mess up badly. Soap passes him by, having a clue on why he's waiting outside right now.

»Waiting on the new recruit?«

He gives a grunt as a response. »Supposedly, they're highly trained and an 'asset' to us.« Soap nods and wishes him good luck, but also prays for the recruit. Meeting Ghost as the first of the team might be scary for the new recruit, but Price probably doesn't really care about that or he wants that to happen. God knows what his plan is; no one really knows.

Some time passes after the interaction before a truck arrives with you in it, a smaller figure popping out of the vehicle once it stopped near Ghost. He doesn't register what he sees in front of him for a moment, too focused on the truck driving away, before properly taking a look at you. While about two heads smaller than him, you have a rather slim build but a gloomy appearance around you. And you're... not older than bloody fifteen. There's no way. That's either a bad joke or you just look incredibly young.

»Name?« Once his gruff voice reaches you, you can't help but already tense up slightly more than before. He looks intimidating, yes, but you're sure he should be your future teammate. Eventually, you briefly introduce yourself, and he is also very sure that he's got the right person in front of him. The new asset. Ghost isn't one to be nosy or ask personal questions, but he needs to really bite back on asking about your age. You look way too young to be here. Let alone meet him in person.

»And you're Ghost, right?« You ask carefully, standing right in front of him with a respective distance. With how stoic your expression is... you're too much like his younger self. Maybe Ghost thinks too much of it, but he hopes you didn't need to go through the same thing he did.

He gives you back a small nod, uncrossing his arms and sizing you up for a second longer before turning around to the door. Walking into the base without saying another word and expecting you to follow him just like that. Pretty scary, to be honest.

You don't know much, but being added to a team of four, not sure what their intentions are with either you or in general. Maybe it's better when he doesn't talk much to you; the less you know, the better. But the base looks too clean and organised for any shady stuff to go on. But you could also be easily mistaken. Looking around, you spot only a few soldiers walking by, how simple it's decorated inside, and it isn't cold like in other buildings. After some long corridors, he stops at a double door, a small sign next to the doors with 'Briefing Room' written on it. Ah, good to know.

Ghost eyes you for a hot second before opening one of the doors and walking in, following behind him once again. Walking in, you see three other men in the room already, looking less intimidating than this ‘Ghost guy‘. »Nice to meet you and welcome to the team.« Another deep but more soft voice greets you, a man with a beard and fisherman's hat giving you a small nod. His gaze hardens for a moment too, like Ghost's did before when first meeting you. He also realises something is wrong. You nod back as a small form of greeting, mumbling out a formal greeting back.

»Kid, tell me. How old are you'?« He asks as he straightens his posture and awaits your answer, tilting his head a bit to the side. It‘s clear this man doesn‘t beat around the bush and goes straight to the point. The other two men in the room stay quiet, silently watching and studying you as well. One with a mowhawk exchanges a look with the tall, scary guy, Ghost, before glancing to the captain.

»There was no age on your file, so I'm just curious.« He adds to his question, sounding polite even though you can clearly hear the suspicion and probably even concern in his voice. Taking a deep breath, you try to be honest, but you're also afraid of the consequences of being honest. There are four men after all, all taller than you, seemingly much bigger and stronger. You know how to fight, but it still gives you chills standing in this room with unfamiliar men, all alone.

»I'm sixteen, sir.« Is your answer and voice steady and calm even though your body language betrays you. Your whole body stays still, with hands behind your back, seemingly waiting for any possible attack or threat to come right your way. It's silent while you look around the faces of them, seeing both surprise and disbelief in almost all of them. Only Ghost stays unwavering, but that might just be his balaclava covering his whole face. He knew something was wrong but wasn't sure enough to ask you that same question earlier, having figured that his captain knew enough anyway to avoid this situation. It stays silent for another beat until the captain sighs out, leaning his hands onto the table in front of him.

»And what's a sixteen-year-old doing in such a place?« He asks you, even though he could ask that question himself. How could he allow this? Is that why there was no age to your file? And are there more poor children like you? It's obvious they're all against something like a 'child soldier‘ in their team, even when you‘re a teen by now. »I was sent here to be an asset to your team.« You answer him, deciding it's better to talk and communicate rather than stay silent and listen to the thick silence.

»Captain, that's-« »Another word and you're out, Gaz.« The guy with the cap is interrupted by the captain's loud voice, giving out a clear warning. You notice how tense it feels in the room, sensing just how badly this could go wrong. Price takes a short breath before turning his attention back to you, standing at his full height once again.

»What do you know? About this, I mean. Do you even know our names? What we're doing?« You simply shake your head, staying stoic and calm even though you have the strong urge to run out of the room, knowing you‘re most likely not welcome in this room. But you won‘t; you've learnt to stay put and stand your ground, to not show any weakness no matter what.

»Kid...« He sighs out, trying to find a way to put this correctly, »Okay, let's start with you first. Tell us about yourself.« This is much kinder than you thought this would be. No one's glaring at you besides one particular shadow in the corner, but that just seems to be in his nature. You answer him, your voice being as steady and calm as possible, while telling them about yourself.

»I've been trained professionally for nearly nine years, been on the field since then. My specialisations are weapon handling, sabotage, sniper techniques, and demolitions.«

You state, carefully picking your words and telling them information about yourself that seems to be most necessary for now. Price stares at you for a few seconds, all eyes on you, while the mowhawk and Ghost are occasionally exchanging looks with each other, seemingly unsure about you. It seems like the captain is thinking before speaking up once more, having decided it.

»That's a lot for sixteen years. You must be real good if you were sent here, no? I think you have potential.« »Price, are you serious-« The mowhawk snaps, glaring at his captain before glancing back to you shortly. »That's a kid.« He hisses, completely thrown off with his captain's easy acceptance of you in their team. »I agree, Cap'. There's no way we'll have a child soldier on our side.« Baseball cap, Gaz, chimes in and tries to convince Price otherwise of you.

It feels both refreshing but also scary when someone talks like this about you, not being used to someone recognising the falseness of this, but you're also afraid if they decide to not accept you into the team. All you can do is watch.

»There's no safer place than here for a kid like this. And the mission is too soon to search for other assets.« He argues back, thinking it's better for you here than anywhere else. He's not wrong; you're in better hands now. The thing is that you have no knowledge of who these people are or what they're fighting for. Or anything else, really.

»Trust me, Soap.« The captain reassures him, Soap, the mowhawk guy, taking his eyes back to you. It's uneasy for you when you know how none of them like the idea of you in the team but the captain. And that's pretty much the only thing keeping you in this task force for now.

»Sorry. We'll keep you in the team, but if you aren't really that good, then we'll have to get rid of you.« The captain's words cut right through you, understanding that this might be a warning for you. That, if you let yourself down or don't show your everything, this might be your end. But maybe he also just said it to scare you. Which worked either way, not wanting to disappoint him. »I understand, sir.« You nod, glancing around the other faces once more quickly as if to remember their faces. ----

Not knowing their names is difficult, having no idea how to ask them for it as well. Wait for them to introduce themselves? Might take longer than some missions. Ask them yourself? No, that's too embarrassing, right? I mean, the captain mentioned their names before in the briefing room, but you just couldn't remember them that quickly. Especially with the situation you were in. But asking them yourself might be a good idea too; practicing social skills and trying to get to know what their intentions are would be a good start.

Looking around yourself, you see only how everyone's preparing for the mission. After the briefing ended, the captain announced that you're all heading out, not able to waste any more time. The mowhawk guy, also the closest to your height, is preparing his guns and picking out some more stuff for himself. Besides him, there's the guy with the baseball cap, and he's doing pretty much the same as his teammate. They look harmless like this, but it's just the fact that these are men, all too unfamiliar to be comfortable around them yet.

Ghost is the only more scary and silent one among them, knowing not to mess with him just by looking at him. The captain is by the helicopter, talking to the pilot and seemingly going over the plan or route once more.

So, there's two people not doing much but preparing themselves, one who's waiting for everyone to be ready and the captain who is busy talking to someone already. Now's your chance, but also not. It doesn't feel right to just walk up to them and start talking, not used to such casual interactions back at your camp. But staring at them isn't really polite either, so you take your eyes off the poor men and instead study the helicopter while strapping on your gear. ----

Sitting in the helicopter is much more interesting, there are more buttons, more extra buttons, interesting technology, and other stuff to look at. Good thing you're sitting next to the captain, too afraid to move the wrong way as if he would care about that in the first place.

He's more focused on the mission and if everything is going according to plan. The others don't seem as nervous or excited in the first place, just like you being rather stoic or focused. To your left sits the scot, he is not looking your way, instead checking out the helicopter's interior as well. Looking straight in front of you, there's Ghost and the most normal-looking one. You could basically ask them their names now, but that could come off as awkward too.

Maybe earlier was a better idea than now... »What's your name again?« Asks the rough voice from your right, looking straight at you. You glance at him and answer him shortly with your name. He nods in response, gesturing to the opposite of him, and goes on.

»That's Gaz. On his right, there's Ghost. And on your left, there's Soap. These are our call signs. I'm Captain Price, sorry for not introducing ourselves earlier.«

Hm, that's very nice of him, actually. You'd never thought he would be so soft spoken, even with his rather rough and raspy voice. But the way he introduces everyone gives you hope that this team might be just a chill and friendly one.

You nod back in return, considering shortly what to say to that. »Nice.« Soap smirks just lightly at your short response, the same goes to Gaz, who after that short introduction looks away once more. Ghost's eyes stay on you for longer, either sizing you up or just staring. Well, there goes your social skills, having thought too much about speaking up and how not to be awkwa-

»What'd you know about guns? You said you specialise in weapon handling.« This is on your left side this time, Soap, if you remember correctly. Your attention is on him now, answering his question after processing it quickly.

»Like, what kind of guns there are or what I have with me?« You ask back, unsure of what to reply exactly to him. He clarifies himself, shifting slightly in his seat to face you better. He tries again, asking you more about what kind of guns are your favourites and if you know some of the mechanics of them and how to tune your gun.

You learn a lot about tuning your gun or rifle, not having been taught that much in your camp. Even though you both haven't talked much, it still felt like you learnt a lot through him. Some would say talking about guns isn't appropriate with a teenager, but is there anything else to talk about with you anyway?

As soon as the helicopter landed and Soap had mostly rambled to you about guns, you're all ready to walk out and officially start the mission. It was rather simple, the plan is to clear a three-story building, get the intel and leave. It shouldn't take any longer than an hour, depends on how many difficulties there are going to be.

After the last few commands of the captain, it starts, pairing up in groups of two while Price goes to the front. Soap is by your side like before, while Ghost and Gaz are in front of you.The atmosphere shifts, and everyone is dead focused, having no place for mistakes. The task of clearing out the building wasn't difficult, it was difficult to actually focus on getting the intel. It was in the basement of the rather big house, only able to get in after having actually cleared out the entire area. After that's done, it goes straight to it, and there was no going back.

Your stomach drops once you reach the basement, it's silent but also so loud you can't hear what the others are saying. Several dead bodies, a dimly lit lamp from the ceiling, the intel in the corner, inside of a USB-stick next to the computer. Price steps in and first puts the stick in to check if it is really what's needed. After a few seconds of loading, it turns out that, yes, it's exactly the information you're here for.

You're finally able to breathe once Price turns around with the intel in hand before giving a firm nod, ready to go back out and return to base. The stench of the dead bodies was torture for you, let alone how dark it was in the room and how silent it was. Walking out was way easier, almost running out as the first one. But outside, there was another surprise. Right as the team went out of the basement, there was another team of soldiers, having just entered the hallway. One wrong move and you're done for, that's for sure.

Your adrenaline skyrockets and makes you act on impulse, shooting two soldiers down with clean head shots. They stop staring and act, one rushing right at you with a knife, probably thinking that’s an easier way instead of shooting at you. Thanks to your aggression that’s mostly caused by your adrenaline rush, you’re quick to block and counterattack him. The enemy soldier is clearly taller than you, but for some reason not hard to fight with at all. You quickly jab his side, which makes him gasp for air; using the distraction to choke him before stabbing him at his other side repeatedly. He cries out and winces before you let go, him holding onto his injured side and falling to his knees. You grab a fire extinguisher from the wall and hit his back with it until he collapses, aiming at his head until you’re sure he is done for. The team took out the rest and glanced to where the loud bangs were coming from, only seeing how you hit the soldier one last time before the fire extinguisher fell from your sweaty palms.

A look of surprise washes over their faces until Nikolai talks into the earpieces, informing you he’s waiting right outside with his helicopter, having about a minute before he needs to fly away.

Once the enemies are out, you're quick to leave the building all together and indeed, see the helicopter of Nikolai. Loaded in and safe, it feels like you've just run a whole marathon. Sitting down at one of the seats with a sigh, you relax your muscles as much as you can. Nikolai’s voice chimes in through the headset you're all wearing once again, all loud and clear and almost as soft spoken as Price's voice. Maybe a bit more warm than the captains, but laced with an accent. The conversation only consists of updating and some light jokes afterwards, it’s mostly quiet. The low grumble of the helicopter is the only thing filling the silence inside, not that it's uncomfortable. It's almost relaxing to finally be safe and at peace for now, even if it's just the way back.

That basement earlier took up some courage in you to go in and stay grounded, not to think too much and focus on the obvious. The surprise attack afterwards sure was surprising but nothing too challenging. The seat was strangely comfortable now after the mission, it's getting darker now anyways as the sun sets and your sore legs are able to have a time out for now. In fact, it's so comfortable that you need to force yourself to stay awake now.

Sandwiched between Price and Soap once more is enough to keep you awake, but not for long. Falling asleep seemed impossible in a room with these four guys at first but now you're napping against the shoulder of Price. Eyes closed and breathing steady, body very much relaxed. Price, on the other hand, is as stiff as a rock right now, not wanting to wake you or make this awkward. Gaz is pretty much amused at the sight in front of him, needing to resist a chuckle. The way you're just so relaxed and napping while Price is as tense as steel is also amusing to the other two teammates.

»We're almost there, just five more minutes.« Nikolai’s thick Russian accent is heard through the mic into the headsets, while Price is feeling relieved that you took your own off headset earlier. It's silent, so Nikolai speaks again, confused on why it's silent.

»Everybody alright?« He asks slowly, awaiting for someone to answer positively. »Rookie fell asleep. Trying t' stay quiet.« Ghost answers quietly back, and Nikolai has to fight back the urge to turn around in his seat and take a look himself. A low chuckle escapes him eventually as he shakes his head lightly and continues flying everyone back to base. ----

The debrief was... calm. Awfully calm. No one's arguing, and no one is yelling for no reason, it's just so casual but professional. Maybe your camp was abusive or at least unprofessional, but this almost feels too calm. It feels as if something will go wrong any second, but it doesn't.

Captain is telling everyone what he found on the USB stick, and the new plan and information are being displayed on the wall by a projector. He's going straight to the point and just tells the obvious, facing the team that is seated at a long table. The next big mission should be in about two weeks until everything is planned, it being a more complicated raid, with the main point of taking held hostages from a big building. Eventually, once he's done, his eyes lock on you and seem to become more serious.

»Before this mission, we'll need to train you as much as possible, so you won't make mistakes. Or worse.« You nod in return, already seeing yourself training day and night and trying to improve impossibly fast.

»We'll train all together and work on our teamwork. As well as spare a few rounds together, hm? Sound good?« You nod once more, feeling like this might actually be more pleasant than hard work like your usual training was. »Good.« You reply back, and once everything is settled, everyone can retreat back into their bunks and rest for tonight. ----

This night was restless for you like every other. Sleeping at a completely different and strange place is always off-setting at first. The bed is normal-sized, and there's nothing you would complain about in your own bunk, you just need to get used to it. Or maybe it was the one-hour nap you took before in the helicopter that prevents you from sleeping now. You're just glad no one addressed it later on after you woke up. Tossing and turning, you eventually fall asleep after several hours from exhaustion.

a/n: don't worry, there will be more chapters, just have to refresh my brain about my plot since I haven't touched it in a while... hope you still enjoyed it!

[cbartonscoffee]

I think I've never been more aware of just how many people only get their info of the batfam through fanfic. I finally started reading Red Robin (2009) and I can not believe how many things are blown out of proportion. Particularly about Dick and Damian.

First of all, Dick does try to put limits and he does get fed up with Damian's ways sometimes. Out of the three first interactions of them in the comic, at least in two he tells him to shut up. And one of those is when Damian starts to brag about being Robin and Tim being useless, he tells him to shut up twice.

Another thing about that moment, is that they treat it like Dick completely dismisses Tim and treats him as unimportant. He doesn't. He takes him seriously, he tells him he needs him, he tells him he views his as an equal, as someone capable. And he also tells him he's concerned about him and that he needs to start processing Bruce's death. Could that have been a little harsh? Yes, but he needed to do it without making Tim think there was room for him to be convinced about his theory because let's be honest, Tim would've taken anything less than complete refusal and tried to change his mind. And had he been wrong neither of them could have taken it.

Secondly, Dick is always left to shoulder the blame of kicking Tim out and of never reaching out. That's bull. And I need to make that clear. Tim was in a delicate point, he tells us this himself multiple times, but the decision to leave was completely made out of his own free will. Another thing he did was put space between him and the people on Gotham. We see only one time in which Dick tries to call him. Tim picks up and tells him he doesn't want to talk. This tells us that Dick respecting Tim's wish of space included almost no (or even no) contact, and Dick calling was not something Tim appreciated or encouraged.

Now. Going into the second year of the run, when he's back in Gotham, there's a few things to talk about and I'm still in the aftermath of Damian and Tim's fight.

I feel it's important to say that even if they are all family, more often than not they're doing their own thing. Like, Babs and Steph are in the Batcave while Dick and Damian are in Wayne Tower, Cass is said to potentially be in Hong Kong and we haven't even heard Jason be name-dropped except for the fact that he went on a rampage at some point.

So, Dick is immediately called away in League business. So he isn't there. Damian is behaving fairly civil besides being a brat, so no one wastes too much effort in correcting what he says. We need to think about the fact that this is a kid whose world was turned upside down multiple times in a short period of time, who has a need to be accepted, and who hasn't yet found his place. All this is to say, that if it's difficult to get him to eat breakfast there's no way they're controlling his every move and that's understandable.

So Dick is away, Damian is still trying to adapt, Alfred has his hands full and everyone else is doing something else.

The whole thing starts because Tim is being kind of cryptic about what he's doing with his hit list and Damian feels left out and goes looking for more. He finds his name in a hidden double side of the hit list marking him as a threat. He understandably feels hurt and angry, because he's a kid, and he's trying, and his predecessor who at this point doesn't even try with him anymore views him as something bad.

So in classic Damian fashion, he falls back on his upbringing and doesn't deal with the situation as one should, talking about it. Instead he cuts team line, hurting before being hurt. It could've been worse, we see in the panel that Tim doesn't have that much of a hard time getting safely to the ground. The problem is that he snaps and starts a full-blown fight he knows Damian won't back out off. (I'm pleased to add that after cutting his line Damian doesn't start anything else)

So they are fighting, Tim has the clear advantage and he knows this, we know this. And that's how Dick finds them. Having just returned from a JL mission, in the place where the Waynes were murdered, with Tim having overpowered Damian.

They go back to the cave and Damian shares his findings, and Dick understands. And Tim tells him he (Dick) knows why he (Tim) did it. Dick agrees, and tells him he should have tried to make it harder to find. Tim says he hadn't thought Damian would try or even care. Dick tells him Damian wants to be accepted.

All in all, so far the only thing this comic has proven to me is that there's a reason comics are the bomb and that fanon has gotten out of hand. I get making things out to be worse for the sake of a story, but everything surrounding these events is basically used as the foundation for Damian and Tim's relationship as well as Dick and Tim's and I don't think I've once read a fanfic where these events are portrayed correctly or even following the real motivations of the characters. This is a disservice to all of them and only serves to amplify the hate towards a character that doesn't deserve it. There's a lot of Damian hate going around. And it sucks. Mostly because people use his actions against Tim to justify it and honestly? I don't think you should be allowed to use that if you haven't read RR and understood what was going on.

[strwberri-milk]

Hii!! I love your writing for LADS 🫶🏻🙈 may I request you write for Sylus talking to the most famous or beautiful woman of N109zone or of princess mafia in a exclusive event while the reader is watching them afar with her jealous energy? Then right after; the reader feels needy, possessive, wanted love and smutty 🔥, don't want to talk to Sylus, and it leads to miscommunication/don't get the wrong idea trope. You can add Luke and Kieran as cameo to make the situation worse telling the reader about Sylus and the girl's history together with a sense of humor that doesn't make the reader feel any better then Mephisto there CAW CAWLING over the fact seeing the reader turns red in frustration 😡😂 I really appreciate and love your work! Hope it be a little long word count (with bulletin points) if you write/accept this request! 🙏🏻

this is so booktok coded and you can interpret that however you wish bc i have Strong opinions about booktok and the current state of media literacy - but unfortunately i am a sucker for the trope and even if this isnt super duper smutty i do love a good jealousy plot - just as a heads up as I say w longer requests - i wont do everything and smut is harder for me to write so in interst of you not waiting months for a request we're gonna go a little off of what your reuquest was bc i also got confused reading it - which is why i always recc not to be too detailed bc then i get pigeon holed and focused on the wrong details :( - ive also combined these two requests bc theyre p similar to me!

You are fully aware that Sylus needs to work with a lot of people for his job. He's got powerful connections because of these events and you've never had a feeling that he was unfaithful. However, that doesn't mean that you can't help but feel insecure when you see how beautiful some of the people he works with are. You know that he loves you and he makes it very clear with his actions but the way he easily smooths things over with that dulcet tone of his.

You're resigned to having to spend the evening with Luke and Kieran - not exactly a punishment but also not the greatest as they give you the whole scoop on everyone Sylus talks to. The way their breaths catch and the quick darting of their masks to you lets you know that there's something else you're not being told but they refuse to let you in, citing respect for the boss' privacy. You know that you won't be able to get them to snitch on him at this rate, forced to watch as he continues to butter her up for whatever reason. You saw the way that others looked at her and for a moment you wondered if he was looking at her the same way, trying not to overthink things because you're also aware of how much he loves you.

You watch angrily as Sylus wraps his arm around her, whispering something into her ear that makes her laugh. The twins look at you and despite being unable to see their eyes you know they're just as confused as you are. They don't stop you when you get up to leave, deciding to follow you. They know his personality well and know that it seems a little out of character for him to be so forward during a meeting.

You decide to go back to his home, locking yourself in the bedroom as you deliberate on what to do. You know you could confront him if you really wanted you but part of you doesn't even want to do that - you feel like you'd be more content to see him grovelling and begging for you to forgive him but you also know he really isn't like that. So you decide to ignore him.

He comes home later that night, fully intending to explain himself but when he sees you fast asleep he simply decides to slide into bed with you. He holds you through the night, not knowing how upset you are with him. In the morning you're gone and he finds that he can't seem to reach you. You run around with your tasks for the day, barely saying hi to him in passing. He knows you're not that busy so it makes no sense to him.

He ends up having more meetings with the woman, much to your anger. After an especially long meeting he finds you standing outside of his office, an angry expression on your face that he just can't take seriously as he finds you adorable. He leans down to give you a kiss and you end up yelling at him about how you know he's giving her more than just his business.

You actually didn't know anything - just that he was far too friendly to her and you wanted to see what he would admit to. He immediately starts to set the record straight, telling you that there's no way you seriously believe he's looking at anyone that isn't you. You cross your arms stubbornly, telling him that isn't going to work on you.

It ends up not mattering when he picks you up to throw you onto his bed, covering you in kisses as he digs his nails into your hips. You can't escape his hold, bent this way and that way as he teases you for really thinking that he sees anybody that isn't you. He calls you possessive names, moving against you in ways that make you see stars over and over again.

Safe to say your new silent treatment to him is not because of you not wanting to speaking to him. Your voice is hoarse, body barely able to leave the silken sheets on your skin as he continues to dote over you with reminders that it'll always only be you.

[senmiyaazx]

Hi! If that's ok could i request Sol with a reader that does not fuck around? Somebody bothering? They're already swinging before the mf can finish the sentence. Someone following them? They're pulling out the hammer out the purse and start charging the person. And pretty much anything in their hands becomes a weapon.

Just curious to see his reaction lol

oo this is an interesting scenario especially in the library scene

SOL X GN READER

cw: guess what! not proofread. reader is lowkey a menace. violence obviously, but it's not that detailed.

The first time you and Sol met was a surprise. He was getting beat up, not wanting to cause a scene in the library and he's outnumbered.

Until you appear from the corner and start roundhouse kicking these bastards like stirring coffee. On top of that, you weren't even that hurt after dealing with those two bullies! Well, aside from the bruise on your cheeks.

Sol was already in love with you before, but when you held your hand out to him with a charming smile on your lips he fell harder, if that was possible. (He's already signing the marriage papers)

Since then, you've become something like Sol's protector? Sol can defend himself perfectly fine. He gets into fights all the time, it's nothing new to him. But he's absolutely smitten when you do it nonetheless, rolling your sleeves up the moment you even see someone looking at Sol the wrong way.

While your feistiness provides good benefits, such as being able to defend yourself even when he's not there, Sol wishes you could.. tone it down a little. He doesn't want you to get hurt that often. Because he'll deal with the other person one way or another. Or risk yourself hurting the wrong person (Someone from a higher class) and that wouldn't do you much good, wouldn't it?

He's happy he has such a strong and brave darling though. His eyes are filled with hearts as you walk through the hallways with your head held high and some students who recognize you scramble to get out of your way in fear of getting on your nerves.

And he loves you. He really does. But please put that hammer away— where did you even get that?! — he wasn't following you! He was he just so happened to be in the same place as you. Geez, you're scary when you get mad.

A little cute too when you furrow your brows at him, telling him to be more careful around you. Sorry pumpkin, he can't resist you.

He realized quickly you're lowkey a hazard to people when you ask him for his least favorite pen in art class and proceeded to nearly hospitalize someone who disrespected you, with it. You obviously get in trouble afterwards, but the uncaring grin you send him made his heart stop for a moment.

"Least no one's gonna bother us now." You say after getting lightly scolded by Sol.

He's pretty sure you noticed the way his cheeks flushed at that.

Since then, he makes sure you're not within any objects that could harm people. Even something as silly as a ruler. (He's seen the way you sent someone to the clinic with a book. He's not taking any risks)

Eventually, whether he does it consciously or not, he ends up protecting other people from you instead of the other way round. Sol doesn't know how it happened or when he started to give his scariest glare to anyone who even thinks about approaching you with malicious intent. It's a win-win for him. He gets to spend more time alone with you and he prevents other people from earning your wrath! The only problem is that he won't be able to do this when he's not with you.

Whatever. He hates to admit it, but hopefully that Crowe dude handles you as well as he does.

And he trusts you, too. He knows you have a goal in mind for this school and he knows you won't get yourself in enough trouble to get expelled. There are.. simply some times where you can't help but put people in their place. Which Sol respects a lot.

That doesn't stop Sol from getting paranoid, however. Oh well, at least he's the one who gets to patch you up after you get into another fight<3

[helslastangel]

I wonder sometimes if these super blunt rude astrologers write about their personal placements as harshly as they do the ones of people they happen to dislike. If so, then cool. I can respect that.

But I read some posts and it's like.... girl. It's so obvious which sign/element/planet combos or aspects you personally hate, lol.

Maybe this is my Libra mercury talking. But sometimes I take really long to write observations because I'm proofreading them for signs of unfairness. When I can, I'll look at my previous posts to see if I was harsh on a placement last time so I can focus on something positive for them in the next one. And vice versa.

I literally feel bad if I reread my old stuff and realize I dragged a particular placement twice in a row without something nice in between. I don't understand people who can't really seem to separate placements from specific people they dislike. And I don't want to understand them tbh. Coming from someone who usually asks "why" for every damn thing, even against my better judgement.

The worst treatment I've ever received in my life was from Scorpio + Cancer men and Pisces + Gemini women. Yet, you will never catch me writing post after post villainizing those placements. Some of my sweetest friendship moments were also with people having sun, moon or other major placements in those same 4 signs.

To get up every day and go on and on negatively about the same placement over and over just tells me that someone can't distinguish where their personal dynamic with specific people ends and the more generally applicable aspects of astrology begin.

I wish I could invent some kind of mind scanner that could instantly display anyone's big 5 and give the prototype to these kinds of people. Just so they could go around and find out how many people they're getting along with JUST fine right now who have all the placements they hate. I know I've said this before but it's something that really rubs me the wrong way and I usually end up unfollowing if I notice a pattern of that in someone's posts. Yeah no. Especially if I get the impression someone is a mean girl astrologer. Nah. Take that energy to Twitter.

[eightstarr]

omg hello my favorite writer!

now that we know how doctor abby x reader, we gotta know the lore with loser!ellie <333

hello my favorite girl! here is the origin story <3

ellie's in the middle of facetiming jesse (they call each other during their lunch breaks every single day, they're like each other's human version of a youtube video to eat with) when she sees you walk behind him, notice his phone and lean down to flash her a quick smile with the cutest wave she's ever seen and then promptly disappear. ellie flinches and straightens her back. her hand shoots up, holding the phone at what she thinks is a more flattering angle than the way she'd been holding it basically on her lap before. but you're gone before she could even wave back.

jesse raises his eyebrows at her pale face. "did you just realize you have to shit or something?" 

"shut the fuck up," ellie hisses, her voice in a rushed whisper even though jesse is wearing headphones and you're clearly not around anymore. "who was that?" 

"what? oh," jesse introduces you by name, says something about knowing you from high school. "she started working here like a month ago, so that's been fun."

ellie can't believe that he's known you for that long and hasn't mentioned you once before. "what the fuck is wrong with you?" she asks him. and she'll keep asking him periodically for the next several months— which she spends stalking your instagram, squinting her eyes at the background behind jesse everytime he calls (in case you're there) and casually visiting him at work when she's feeling bold.

she has her first real conversation with you one summer when you're both at a party on some guy's backyard. you compliment her jorts and tell her she's funny and ellie thanks god that she's just drunk enough to be cognitive and herself but also not overwhelmingly aware of every single thing that's happening. she leaves with your number on her phone (oh my god) and your gloss sticky on her cheek (oh my god????)

i'm sorry to say that you don't actually kiss until at least a whole year later though!! ellie's convinced that you just wanna be friends and she loves being your friend so so much, she wouldn't change it for the world! but also she does think about kissing you every night but she won't even hint at it until she thinks that you might be interested.

and she's really so fucking good at hiding it! ellie can be sneaky and i think we should talk about it more. like you don't even know if she fucks tbh but she has to be fucking, right??? she's so hot?? there has to be someone and she's just not telling you about it. it's not until you know her really well that you realize she's more open with you than she is with most people in her life and if there was someone she would tell you and now that you think about it why does she always always always make time for you, that's crazy!! what does that mean!!! you don't know because she's insane and doesn't register the way you look at her with hearts in your eyes as anything but friendly, so she's determined to respect your wishes and keep being your friend. you definitely end up kissing her first. it's worth it though <3

[eowyntheavenger]

Hi! I saw your post on telling Americans to vote, and I was wondering what you think of posts from people from other parts of the world who are calling Americans evil for voting for Biden because of his support for Israel. I've seen a few already. They seem to be completely convinced that Americans deliberately voted for Biden specifically to side against Palestine and no other reason, and spread the general (pretty ignorant and hateful) message of "Americans are evil because of the actions of their government and because they collectively refuse to vote for a president who is good and not simply 'the lesser of two evils'". It frustrates me because they seem to think they're experts on US politics, culture, and society and have all the answers, but it also makes me concerned because it reminds me of the whole Russian bot thing from last time. Like, I'm 99% sure the people reblogging these posts aren't Russian bots (don't know about the OPs though), and they unquestioningly believe this. What do you think of this and how would you go about addressing this issue? Do you think it's possible to get them to understand how little they actually know about the US and how they're actually promoting a message that makes things worse for everyone? I've also seen less scathing posts that are just disheartened and don't seem to believe the democrats are truly better to vote for than the republicans and so it's just two sides of the same coin. To be fair, I think that sort of feeling is only further encouraged because there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden, not even back to square one after Trump moved the country so far backwards. I think most Americans really wish the elections actually had good candidates and they could pick the best of two goods, but are frustrated and stuck with the current system and don't know how to actually get to the point where there are good candidates. (Though personally I think voting for the one who isn't actively trying to make themselves a king with unlimited terms is a decent start. I can understand the frustration though.)

Hi! Thanks for the ask. This stuff worries me too. I've gotten comments on my posts like that too, telling me/other Americans that we're evil for voting for Biden.

But I've seen a much larger number of comments and posts from people outside the United States BEGGING us to vote for Biden. I literally get tags like that on my posts EVERY DAY urging Americans to vote blue. So I think that's valuable context, even if it doesn't solve the problem of the "I hate everybody who votes for Biden" crowd.

And yes, it's definitely a shitty argument on their part to claim that people voting for Biden are specifically siding against Palestine. Literally every single person I know in real life and online who plans to vote for Biden has been criticizing and protesting his policies on Palestine.

In terms of convincing the anti-voters that they're wrong, honestly, I don't know. They don't listen to reason and they seem intent on spreading despair. Some of Biden's policies have been terrible (Willow oil-drilling project), some of them have been downright evil (military aid to Israel), but I'm a rational person and I know that Trump is worse in every respect.

I've tried debating them. It's been pointless every time. They genuinely don't know how the government works, which scares me. Common takes include: 1) a genuine lack of awareness of how pro-Israel Trump and the right wing are, combined with magical thinking that a virtually unknown third party candidate can win the presidential election, 2) truly impressive mental gymnastics blaming Biden for the overturn of Roe v. Wade, and 3) continuing the mental gymnastics to blame Biden and the Democrats for anti-trans policies...

I guess my advice is to either ignore them and move on, or debunk things when you have time/energy? It's easier said than done, I know. There's nothing more annoying than someone being stupid on the internet, especially when they accuse you of stuff that just isn't true, and especially when they're spreading dangerous misinformation or voter-suppression rhetoric.

Like you, I'm highly suspicious of anyone who advocates AGAINST voting, or against voting blue. And I agree, many of these people are not bots, like you said, but I call them useful idiots, because they're doing the bots' work for them.

The one thing you said that I'm going to push back on is "there didn't really seem to be much if any progress made with Biden." Biden's actually made lots of progress on a variety of issues, and reversed some of Trump’s damage, it just doesn't get a lot of fanfare and it’s unfortunately happening at the same time as Republican gains in state legislatures and while they control the Supreme Court. But Biden and his administration have:

• invested billions in green architecture and clean energy, including making sure federal investments benefit low-income communities

• introduced new fines for companies' methane emissions

• introduced a plan to cut the federal government's greenhouse gas emissions by 65% by 2030 (that includes the military, which is a huge emitter)

• passed a huge bill for improving the country's infrastructure, including bridges, roads, broadband and more

• introduced first-ever national strategy on gender equality and equity and pushed Congress to pass the Equal Rights Amendment

• fought for women's reproductive rights after the overturn of Roe v. Wade

• put more women, people of color, and women of color on the federal bench than any of his predecessors combined

• nominated Kentaji Brown Jackson as the first Black woman to serve on the Supreme Court

• boosted funding to historically Black colleges

• ordered the DOJ to end the use of private prisons by the federal government

• pardoned thousands of people convicted on federal marijuana charges

• created a White House office of gun violence prevention

• passed the Respect for Marriage Act, guaranteeing federal rights and benefits for same-sex couples

• rolled out a series of actions to protect the rights and safety of the LGBTQ+ community, including protecting queer and trans foster youth, improving access to mental health services, and addressing the rise in hate crimes

• challenged discriminatory state bans against gender-affirming care and trans athletes

• called to support trans youth in State of the Union address and restored the White House tradition of recognizing Pride Month

• changed passport rules so that people can obtain a passport with no gender marker

• examined efforts by each federal agency to advance LGBTQ+ rights around the world

• reversed Trump's transgender military ban

• protected the rights of incarcerated trans people

• forgave billions in student debt, repeatedly, and introduced penalties for college programs that trap students in debt

• slashed bank overdraft fees

• expanded guaranteed overtime pay for millions of people

• made union-busting harder

• prevented discriminatory mortgage lending

• made efforts to expand the child tax credit, which could lift hundreds of thousands of children out of poverty

• cracked down on agriculture monopolies to support farmers and small businesses

• made it so the government is going to start taking drug companies' patents away if they don't make affordable drugs

• made over-the-counter birth control pills available for the first time

• lowered the cost of hearing aids and expanded access to them

• spent millions of dollars on students' mental health

• reversed discriminatory healthcare rules

• reinvigorated cancer research

• announced plans to replace all leaded pipes in the next ten years as well as combatting lead exposure abroad

• changed rules for how people can get aid after disasters so they can get more protection and immediate payments more easily

• introduced new data privacy rules protecting people from tech companies

• pushed the federal government to monitor AI risks

• maintained steadfast support for Ukraine in the face of Russian aggression

• maintained steadfast support for Taiwan in the face of Chinese intimidation

• strengthened ties with allies in Asia and the Pacific Islands

• pledged climate change assistance to low-lying Pacific Island countries

• literally IMMEDIATELY after being elected, Biden fortified DACA, rejoined the Paris Agreement, and ended Trump's discriminatory "Muslim ban", ended the Keystone XL Pipeline and fossil duel development in wildlife monuments, (same as last link) rejoined the WHO, strengthened COVID-19 response measures on a variety of fronts, re-included non-citizens in the U.S. census, and passed executives orders on racial equity in the federal government

And I'm sure there's more I left out.

There are also things Biden does that literally don’t make the news, but matter a lot, like funding the Postal Service, and continuing to have a State Department so we can conduct overseas diplomacy (Trump tried to defund the USPS and wants to purge the State Department and fill it with loyalists).

[starryalpacasstuff]

Knock Knock Boys: A Queer Asian Lens

I didn't watch Knock Knock Boys as it was airing, because it didn't really seem like the kind of show I'd be into. However, this post by @lurkingshan and @waitmyturtles' enthusiastic recommendation convinced me to give it a shot. Having binged the entirety of the series in a day, I can say that the show was an absolute delight to watch.

I've seen plenty of people talking about how wonderfully sex positive the show was, so I'm not going to bother with going too much into it, but I will say that the drama clearly showed the kind of sex education and awareness that is desperately needed around the world. I also really liked how Lukpeach and Latte were the ones responsible for pretty much all of the sex education in the show. It was very realistic in that, in my experience, it's extremely common for teenagers and young adults to get a majority of their knowledge about sex from their friends and the internet. The show had a very clear message about the importance of talking freely about sex with younger generations, because the taboo on the topic only harms teenagers in the long run.

Now, besides that, there was one more issue that I thought the show did wonderfully: it showed how asian kids are often hesitant to discuss things with their parents because they assume the worst in the beginning. I'm having some trouble articulating this, because it's such an abstract, ingrained concept to me, so forgive me if this is incoherent. I'm also generalizing my experience as an Indian, so please do correct me if I'm wrong here. That being said, having been raised in a society that values respect and listening to elders without question, discussing alternate ideas with parents can be a very difficult thing for most of us. It's easy to assume what parents would say to an idea and decide that trying to convince them otherwise is a task that is either futile or requires too much energy.

The best way I can describe is that the mindset becomes "It's better to ask for forgiveness if you get caught instead of asking for permission straight away". For example, had Almond asked his mother if he could stay with three other guys, she would've most definitely flat out refused, since she would've had a lot of preconceived notions about the idea. But, because Almond is able to show her that he's happy as he was, she was perfectly fine with him continuing to stay with the others. I think that's the hallmark of most asian parents, they want us to be happy but they're convinced that they know what kind of life will make us happy. They did something similar with Peak and his father, but my feelings on that are a little more complex, so we'll come back to this.

Peak and Thanwa, man. I loved Latte and Almond but these two just stole the show for me. I know some people felt frustrated with Peak's dallying and hesitance, but I just felt so sad for him, and something about his situation just hit very close to home. And Seng, the actor that he is. One particular moment that stuck with me was the scene when he leaned against the door while Jumper attacked Max. I must've rewatched that moment half a dozen times, because his acting was impeccable. I will say, I wish that they'd given us a better resolution on the arc after Max, but those are mostly minor quibbles. What I really wanted to talk about was the arc with Peak's father. Peak gathering the courage to tell his father with the support from his found family was beautiful. The scene at Knock Knock House the day before Peak left was one of the most magnificent, emotionally charged scenes I've seen in asian ql in a while. Coming from a societ wherein arranged marriage is the norm, the storyline hit hard in all the right places.

But. I did not love the resolution of the arc. I think we've had some conversation about how some shows try to be both in the bubble and out of the bubble simultaneously, and the last two episodes of the show felt a little like that. From what we knew about the father, it felt almost too easy for him to simply accept everything right away. There should have been some struggle for reconciliation. I know that the show has a theme of assumptions and lack of communication disrupting parent-child relationships, but in this case how fast they move on just seems unrealistic. My cynicism aside, even if we assume that the father wasn't homophobic, there should've been more of a conversation on the breaking of the engagement! The social implications, the father asking him why he didn't say anything for so long, Jane's involvement (how did the father know that she knew about this?). The only argument I can see against this is that the father, while initially put off by the revelation, chose to act otherwise to support his son. But then, he most likely wouldn't have insisted they take his car. And there still should've been some sort of a conversation about the engagement. Arranged marriages have a purpose; it's to provide financial and social security. I find it extremely hard to believe that a father who arranged a marriage for his son wouldn't have so much as discuss the implications of being gay with him. They tried to have the engagement have consequences with the wedding banquet, but the resolution for that really only made it worse. This is cynical of me, but I simply cannot suspend my disbelief enough to believe that the entire wedding party was perfectly happy with the turn of events. This whole resolution just seemed out of place in a show that was otherwise so wonderfully grounded in reality while still being absolutely hilarious. I think, if the show had done something a little more similar to GAP, it would've felt more realistic.

All of that aside, I really did enjoy watching the show. It was hilarious and heartwarming, and the characters were absolutely wonderful. The resolution of the final arc did drag it down a little, but I would be lying if I said that watching two queer couples get to celebrate their relationships with their community didn't warm my heart at all (Also, side note- Jane having a girlfriend was a brilliant subversion). All in all, it's a great series. It definitely felt like something new and fresh compared to the kind of qls that I've been watching lately.

[professorbussywinkle]

Some people have kids because they want a slave...

....Think for a second

The obsession with punishment and discipline and "teaching them a lesson" often in brutal, unforgiving ways that don't teach them to follow their internal guide, but to fear your wrath if they do something you might perceive as wrong

The lack of respect for their bodily autonomy, their feelings, and their personhood

Treating everything they do or say like it's beneath consideration or without any value or significance if it does not serve you in some immediate gratifying way

The overemphasis on obedience being a central factor to how much moral worth they have as a human being

Using the provision of basic necessities(food housing, clothing) to justify mistreating them, treating the provision as something that can be withheld if they misbehave or "step out of line"

Believing their child is somehow always up to no good for no certifiable reason, to justify invading their privacy, denying them access to their social circles and means of communication

Publicly shaming or humiliating their child on camera and posting it on the internet in order to get them to behave in the ways you want them to

Soliciting their child's opinion, then yelling at them for disagreeing with you or "talking back". Also ranting at length about things they know their kids disagree with them about until their kid finally reaches a breaking point and says something, at which point, they're horrible combative children for constantly arguing with you

Treating their emotions as frivolous and pointless, or a sign of weakness not to be expressed freely and openly, forcing them to walk on eggshells around you for fear that anything could potentially set you off

Frequently telling them how lucky they are to not be physically abused. also not telling you what made them angry, leaving you not knowing what it was that upset them and them deliberately not telling you when you inquire about it

Using the excuse "I am your parent, so I know what's best for you" in order to force children to do something that is only meant to make the parent feel in control, and not for their child's well-being.

alluding that you are the sole reason why they can’t do whatever the hell they want and wished you didn’t even exist so they can have more freedom. (This one hits close to home for me)

These types of parents get off on this, literally...in an almost pornographic way it would seem, by pushing around, harming, and denigrating someone who's smaller and weaker than them, by exerting power and control over a little human being who is unable or unwilling to fight back against them, all so they can flex their big boy muscles, all so they can prove they have dominion over you and show you that you have no power to do anything about it, and then deluding themselves about how it's all about "discipline" or "teaching" so they don't feel bad about it

Does it make you feel so fucking powerful??

Does it make you feel so in control??

Does it make you feel so badass??

abusing and traumatizing a vulnerable little person half your fucking size and feasibly being able to get away with it under the guise of "discipline" with no reproach or recourse because you can't or refuse to deal with your own emotional damage??

Demon behavior.

[that-foul-legacy-lover]

I don't think I've ever seen this particular meet up around, and if you've written something like this please kindly point me to it, but...

I'm dying to know. How would Legacy react to the other Harbingers?

We kinda know Ajax's opinion on them from voice lines, but I really wanna know what Moth TM thinks

And, if you wanna go the sagau route too, how would he feel being in a Harbinger only team? (Aka Childe, Scara/Wanderer and Arlecchino, in the present moment, but let's pretend we have a fourth one of them already)

hoohoohoo i got you, this is going to be a long one so bear with me mothlings!!

Director: Pierro is suspicious to Foul Legacy, he smells like the Abyss, yet not. the stars in his eyes match the ones in Legacy's glittering wings, but their light is from Teyvat, not the otherworldly glow from beneath this land. Legacy doesn't like it, the feel of being so close to home but with something obviously wrong that he simply can't put his claw on

First: Capitano is a pillar of strength, someone both Childe and Foul Legacy admire wholeheartedly- but Legacy also sees his nobility, the way he treats even his lowest level agents with respect. he aspires to be like that one day, someone people can look up to and expect kindness in return, so even Foul Legacy will give the First Harbinger a small, polite bow

Second: Legacy detests Dottore with all of his heart. not only does Childe have younger siblings, but Dottore has also attempted to rope him into experiments on his Abyssal half. Foul Legacy hates being treated like a thing, like just a feral animal, and that's not even mentioning what he fears the Doctor could do to you. Childe has to hold him back from growling viciously whenever he passes Dottore in the hall

Third: Columbina is strange, but Legacy is also strange! she's unsettling, yes, but she never tries to harm him or Childe- unless the latter riles her up enough to fight. sometimes when Foul Legacy is particularly homesick for you, nations away from Snezhnaya, he'll listen to her eerie singing as she sits nearby, not paying him any mind at all

Fourth: Legacy regards Arlecchino with both fear and respect. she's cordial enough, keeping her operations quiet and training her children to be the next set of Fatui soldiers, much like how Ajax became Tartaglia. the Knave terrifies Foul Legacy with her calm ruthlessness, but as long as she doesn't raise a finger towards you, he won't do anything

Fifth: Pulcinella is a curious case, treating Childe like a grandson and regarding his Abyssal half with kindness as well. it's a welcome change, and yet... Legacy can't help but feel like he isn't completely sincere. there's the barest undertone of a lie when he tells Childe about the other Harbingers, and Legacy watches the information with a care, suspicious eye

Sixth: ERROR. DATA NOT FOUND.

Seventh: Childe doesn't get the chance to interact with Sandrone that often, so neither does Foul Legacy. but he's very curious about what she does, always tinkering away in her lab- it's less foreboding than Dottore's set of rooms, at least. once she begrudgingly allowed him to watch her work, and needless to say her robots consider Foul Legacy their friend now

Eighth: Signora wasn't Childe or Legacy's favorite coworker when she was alive- they're not happy that she's dead, but it is somewhat of a relief to not have Childe bite his tongue with a vengeance whenever some snide comment slipped from her mouth. still, Legacy almost wishes he knew a bit more, having seen her stare longingly out the window at the silent snow all too often- he knows that longing. it's the type he feels when he misses you

Ninth: Legacy doesn't know much about Pantalone, apart from his love of wealth. he's an elegant man, to be sure, someone who can simultaneously keep his composure while also being entirely condescending. but Childe has a habit of buying you trinkets and gifts during his travels, so he's still grateful for the funds the Regrator provides

Tenth: ???

Foul Legacy wouldn't mind being in a team with other Harbingers- he knows they can't hurt him, at least not directly, and it seems to make the Creator so happy. he basks in your warm words, your loving attention, purring happily whenever he hears your sweet voice praise him- but only when his teammates aren't watching. he just knows that the Wanderer, mysterious as he is, will mock him for it, and Arlecchino always seems to know what's going on even when she's not present. his fourth teammate always seems to switch; he likes it best when it's Sandrone or Capitano. Legacy knows how the rest of them feel, though, how the Wanderer lowers his hat or how Arlecchino's lips quirk when they hear your compliments- the Creator has the adoration of them all

[danieldrivesfast]

Here I go again.

You know, when I first got my tickets for COTA, I was so excited to meet more F1 fans, especially ones who aren't men. I was ready to go to meetups, trade bracelets, make some acquaintances I could bullshit with. Spread the joy of girlhood, you know?

(My tickets got upgraded for free thanks to a very benevolent rep, so now I'm at the top of a $1500/ticket grandstand instead of GA, but I digress. 😌)

After being around the "fandom" more? I'll take the men. Every time.

When it comes to talking sports, men are awful in a specific way. They'll talk down to you, sure, but the second they realize you're right, they either move on or stop acting like an idiot. Honestly, more recently men - in person especially - have been decently respectful when talking racing. The last few races I've been to have been great for conversations and trading stories (and free beer). They don't give a shit who you are as long as you know your stuff.

Fandom girlies (gn)? They'll wish death on someone for breathing the wrong way. They'll harass someone until they leave social media. They'll harass team employees about decisions they don't like or imagined offenses even though those employees have no say. They'll stalk partners and families and leave nasty messages and think that's okay. They'll mock drivers for being open about their mental health struggles and actively try to make it worse. They'll create narratives about people they've never met to justify the vile things they say and do. They'll openly admit they don't care about reality, they hate for hate's sake. The girls can't understand that these are human men with emotions and personalities, they're not characters written for their enjoyment. They have lives and relationships that the public isn't privy to, and nobody is owed every detail about their private lives. In person? Fucking yikes. God forbid you like the same driver and try to have a conversation. (I promise, he's not going to fuck either of us.)

In my time around sports, not just racing, I have always tried to be welcoming and encouraging to people getting into it. I used to work with a pro team and a specific athlete to orchestrate special experiences for fans. I always believed it was better to have more fans, especially younger, diverse fans. But dealing with what I see here, on Twitter, on TikTok, on IG? I don't want these people around racing, or society, to be honest. It's like they saw the ugly men and said "How can we be worse?"

OBVIOUSLY it's not every girl or every man. I know there are girls who are incredible and men who most definitely are not. But if I'm picking a group, I'll take the one that isn't going to call me a racist/make up shit about me/tell me I should die or that they want to kill me for pointing out they're factually wrong about something or liking a different driver.

But sure, girlies. Tell me all about respect.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for getting angry with my aunt for being uncomfortable with me doing things to show affection to my girlfriend in front of my family at the dinner table?

Could this post be tagged 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍⚧️ anon so I can find it more easily? Thank you!

(Possible homophobia and transphobia trigger warning)

I (transmasc enby) and my mom went over to my aunt's house for dinner, because family from far away was in town at her place and I wanted to see them. My girlfriend (who lives with me because she moved from far away and we're also very serious about our relationship) came along despite dealing with a headache and neck pain at the time because she wanted to meet the family from out of town (she'd already met my mom and the aunt hosting the dinner before).

At some point after dinner my girlfriend's head and neck pain were really starting to bother her, so she asked for some migraine meds and for me to massage her neck and head to try and ease the discomfort. We didn't leave the dinner table because we were still trying to be part of the conversation, although ultimately she did go lay down on the couch for a bit because it was getting to be too much. Girlfriend and I were kinda stuck because we rode over with my mom.

The next day, aunt bothered my mom a lot and insisted that she let us know how "uncomfortable" we made "everyone". No elaboration whatsoever but she really pushed about it to the point that my mom felt forced to convey the message. Essentially aunt wanted her to tell us that anything besides hand holding was not okay and we made everyone upset, but did not elaborate on what we did wrong. This made my girlfriend cry, and it made me furious (for the record, the next time I spent time with this side of the family all we did was hold hands and aunt still looked at the two of us with disgust so 🤷).

I reached out to her to 1) let her know she was either going to have to tolerate our relationship or cut us off; and 2) try to confirm exactly what it was we did wrong that night so we don't do it again. She told me my girlfriend and I were being inappropriate at her kitchen table because I was rubbing her head and neck, and that we should have either dealt with it where nobody else had to see or gone home (once again, we rode over with my mom so going home wasn't really an option). She insisted it wasn't about us being a queer couple but given that she believes gay people go to hell and has said transphobic things in the past I'm doubtful she's being truthful.

I told her that was such a stupid thing to be weird about, that maybe she should ask questions instead of being immediately judgemental, that it's unfair to ask someone to leave when they're dealing with chronic pain, and that it was hypocritical of her to be weirded out by that when the family was making inappropriate jokes at the table earlier and that was apparently just fine. I admit I also used the opportunity to air out a couple other grievances I had such as: the time she yelled at me for something I didn't do and said very mean things to me because of it at a time where I was not in a good place mentally (she refuses to apologize for this), and her deliberately deadnaming me and using the wrong pronouns to refer to me. I told her if she can't respect me and my girlfriend then I would like if she didn't talk to me anymore. Thankfully she's at least been respecting my wishes in this regard.

Evidently she got very upset about it because she said something to another aunt, who then got angry with me and refused to listen to me, telling me I should just apologize if I made someone uncomfortable (but that's a story for another AITA).

Am I the asshole?

[twisted-confessions]

https://www.tumblr.com/cheekinpermission/746227919612936192?source=share

Hope not late! 25 , 5 and 28👀👀

Nope not late at all!!

25. Which character(s) would you actively avoid? Personally, you would not see me anywhere near Vil, Rook or Sebek.

I can appreciate Vil's efforts to have people more self-confident in their own image however I absolutely despise how forceful he goes about it, especially with Epel and the dance troupe. If I EVER caught him trying to change parts of myself that I'm proud of (my australian accent, my nerdy sense of fashion, etc.) it would be ON SIGHT- (Can you tell I'm still not over Book 5?)

For Rook, i can say I..... respect his dedication and loyalty to his beliefs. However? That man... he scares me... Also, i'm still extremely salty over the VDC/SDC results WE SHOULD HAVE WON THAT AND WE LOST TO THE TWST EQUIVILANT OF BABY SHARK- Rook, i don't care about your reasonings for why we weren't at our best, I've seen the video performance AND THE NRC TRIBE FUCKING NAILED IT!!!

And then our croccy boi- Now don't get me wrong, I do love Sebek as a member of the first year gang of idiots. I also don't know a lot about him personally since I've only known him in events and havent started Book 7 yet. From what I have seen, he does annoy me a lot with his blatant disregard and disrespect to anyone who isn't Malleus or Lilia. His ego and his racism also really piss me off and make me wanna slap some sense into him. I understand it comes from a place of self-loathing but dude, PLEASE read the room for once and not screech our ears off. I'm certain that I would eventually befriend him but if we actually met face to face, it would be a miracle for me to not punch him 1 minute after his insults.

5. If you could have any unique magic / signature spell in the game, which would you choose and why?

Ooooh I've never thought about that until now actually. Personally, i would want something that would be useful and practical both in a day to day life or in a fight since I'm not very physically strong. Going with that idea, i'd more than likely pick either Split Card or Paint The Roses/Doodle Suit. Multiple me's to help me do chores around the house or distract someone in a fight? YES PLEASE!! I also have a lot of sensory issues so I feel like Paint the Roses would really help me eat the things i need to or make a certain texture that feels funny to me turn comfortable. We've also seen how useful it can be in a fight during Riddle's Overblot when Trey turned the rosebush into cards and saved us.

If just for fun though, I'd love to try out any of Savanaclaw's UM's/SS's. Now THAT would be chaotic heheh.

28. What is the TWST related content that you've produced that you are most proud of?

I personally really love my HTTYD x TWST fic that i've been writing. Knowing myself, I probably wont ever finish/post it so I'll have what I've written linked here for anyone who's interested in my favourite brainworm lol. Bella is a very special oc near and dear to my heart as she's the first one that I've enjoyed writing for since being kicked out of home over a year ago. She gave me back my creativity and I couldn't be more thankful for it.

Right now, I've even been imagine a Fairly OddParents x TWST fic in my head which I think would be a BLAST to write, where my Twisted version of Timmy Turner (a girl called Izzy) would use their rule free wish to be a part of Wanda, Cosmo and Poof/Peri's family as their bio daughter when they're no longer her godparents and becomes a half-fairy hybrid in the process. The idea of a "magicless" girl at NRC who out of nowhere suddenly can not only make but GRANT wishes that bend the laws of reality around her is absolutely hilarious to me. Haha take that you pricks, you thought I was weak? BOOM you're a hedgehog, now you really are a prick. Rewatching FOP and seeing how Timmy can be such a menace/pos really makes me think he would fit in GREAT amongst NRC lol.

I'm also really proud of the Card edits I've done for other people where I turn their OC's into different rated cards so it looks like it's from the game. Seeing all the different kinds of OC's and hearing about their characters is so amazing.

Feel free to send in any more asks or questions!! I love interacting with the Twst Community <3

[succulentsiren]

Hey Siren!

(Can I adress you like that???) I hope you are having a great time wherever you are. What advice would you give to someone that has never dated before and has no experience with romantic relationships? Please be a little more detailed that just take it slow and bla bla bla. I already know that, but I want to get know something I could not know if I have never dated before. Some inside knowledge, if you will. Please excuse any possible spelling mistakes I have dyselxia .

Take care!

Lots of love from here!

What do you think the most important advice always is for a beginner driver? ! To take your time and take it slow i

You don't know how many people wished they would've heard this advice before engaging with the wrong person.

It's not just senseless advice. Dating isn't something to be rushed through. It takes time to get to know someone, to see if they're the right fit for you, if your lifestyles align, to understand how they feel about you, if you want to spend years of your life with this person, etc.

If you rush through the process (especially if you've never dated/driven before you'll end up crashing. The same applies to dating. Let it happen slowly and naturally.

More Advice For Unexperienced Daters

• Create standards by making a list of what you require before entering a relationship and when you do find what you're looking for, keep your standards! You must have a backbone when dating because you will be tested to see if you will fold or not. Never let them intimidate or pressure you into anything. Vet them and do background checks as well. Again, take your time to feel it out and don’t be afraid to let people go. There’s plenty more, qualified, fish in the sea.

• Learn to read the red flags and escape before it's too late. Pay attention to their manners towards you and towards other people. If he/ she disrespects other women, it's a sign they'll do that to you. If they're abrasive towards their mothers, it'll show up later in the relationship. If they have a cigarette, alcohol or weed addiction, they are weak willed and get easily distracted. If they don't court you, they're not that interested. If they're trying to force you into their religion, they're trying to control you.

• Learn to read the green flags. If they want to get to know you, without sexual demands, they're likely more interested in forming a genuine relationship. If they make a promise and actually keep it, they're reliable. If they treat the women in their lives well, it shows that they are respectful. If they don't push you into doing anything before you're ready or uninterested, they're not trying to control you.

• The minute you don't like something SPEAK UP and say something. Communication is key. Many relationships fails because of misunderstandings and emotional immaturity. But they're are also many relationships that thrive because they value healthy communication and speaking life into each other.

• Get with someone who respects your pace. Never ever commit to changing yourself for the pleasure of someone else, especially if they're pressuring, criticizing or downplaying you. Free yourself by leaving them behind.

• Keep your independence. Never get to the point in ANY relationship, where you're dependent on that person for the responsibility of your well-being. Remain self sufficient. Earn your own money (even if it's a small side hustle) and have your own individual hobbies, friends and activities.

• Stay mysterious. Don’t tell them everything about you on the first date. Let it be earned. Share more parts of yourself, with time, as you get to know each other.

[meownotgood]

sense of control. / hayakawa aki

"have you ever had your finger bitten?"

pairing: control devil!aki x gn!reader

word count: 4.1k

tags: 18+, suggestive content, aki is the control devil, teasing, corruption, power imbalance, stalking, the office scene from episode 5 but with aki

Aki brings his cigarette to his lips, taking a deep drag in, smoke filling his lungs, before tapping the cigarette over an ashtray on the desk. He tilts his head to the side to exhale the smoke away from you, and then he turns back to lean his tall frame over your shoulder. With his finger, he points to a space at the bottom of the sheet of paper in front of you. 

"Stamp here, and right here." 

You're nodding, swiftly following his instruction, but there's something about the way you're moving: it's much slower, much less energetic than usual. You've also refused to meet his eyes since you got here, just staring down aimlessly at the desk — Aki can tell, he noticed it from the moment you walked in. The Control Devil can always tell, and this simply won't do. 

Aki could immediately tell that something was up with you. This isn't the way you normally act with him. You're usually thrilled just to be in his presence, and you tend to perk up whenever he speaks to you; if you had a tail, it'd be wagging, is what Aki always says. 

Right now, though, you're sulking in your chair, your head hung, your expression flat and lifeless, as if you're lost in thought. It's clear there's something wrong, and Aki intends to get to the bottom of it, for the sake of your well-being and his own curiosity. 

The Control Devil has taken quite a liking to you since you started working at this division. You're obedient to a fault, easy to please, and for a human, you're remarkably interesting. There's something about you that makes him want to see more, know more, own more. It's a feeling he's never experienced, but he felt it even from the first time he met you, from when he first saved you from those devils. 

You should consider yourself lucky, Aki figures. Plenty of people have yearned to grow closer to him, to a lack of success. He doesn't trust easily, and he doesn't harbor fondness for anyone, really. You'd be the first. 

And it seems as if you've taken a bit of a liking to him, too. You're always following him at his heels, always ogling him, always keen to impress him. You practically glow at every word of praise he gives you. Honestly, you couldn't be any more obvious. 

Perhaps it's because he saved your life, or perhaps it's because you're respectful of his status — After all, there's a certain level of admiration people have to show to the lieutenant of the division, and to the strongest hunter in the prefecture. But your affection is… different. 

As the Control Devil, Aki's become used to using his power on anyone he wishes to be under his influence, but you? Aki has never had to use it, not even once. The admiration you have for him is something innate. You're obedient regardless, you're under his control, even when you aren't. Aki likes that about you. 

The way he can win you over without the need for any of his abilities — It makes Aki feel a kind of thrill, it's exciting. It'll be so fun to get you addicted to him, to make you see him and only him, just from his prowess alone. You'll be so good for him, Aki already knows it. 

You've always been easy to read, too, and that's another thing he likes, and that's why Aki is sure you're acting strange. After observing you for some time now, spending more and more time with you, understanding your emotions has only gotten easier and easier. 

The higher-ups have started to get on his ass about it. They're always complaining about how he keeps ditching his duties, and they've started to catch onto the fact that Aki spends a lot more time than he needs to with his certain favorite subordinate. 

They're your subordinates, not your pets. Don't get too attached, Hayakawa. 

If only they knew how obsessed he was already. 

"You're almost done with paperwork," Aki comments, breaking the silence and dragging himself out of his thoughts. He fiddles with the cigarette held between his fingers, smoke idly wisping up from the end. He continues, "The Bat Devil was your first big devil kill, so there's a lot of mandatory paperwork to sign. Next time, there won't be so much." 

There's no response from you. Aki eyes you up and down, rolling his shoulders back, and then he takes another long, slow drag from his cigarette. 

Through a mouthful of smoke, he asks, "There's something on your mind, isn't there?" 

At that question, you finally look up to him, meeting his eyes for the first time since you've sat down; his gaze is sharp, depths of deep blue swirled with bright, hypnotic rings. When those eyes are locked onto yours like this, he's damn near impossible to look away from, but when Aki points to a new section on the page and taps his finger against it, eye contact never breaking, you manage to tear your gaze away to turn back to your paperwork. 

You shrug, pressing your stamp firmly onto the page where Aki is pointing. It imprints a small, red signature of your initials written in Kanji. 

"I guess… kind of," You reply quietly, a little hesitantly, "It's just… Hayakawa-sir, you remember the party from last night, right?" 

Ah, the division's monthly drinking party. Aki had invited you a few days ago, figuring the party would be much more enjoyable if you were around, and it took place last night, at one of the local restaurants. 

Parties have never been his kind of scene. They're too loud, too busy, and there's far too many annoying, wasted people. No matter how much he drinks, Aki can never seem to get drunk, so he's never really seen the appeal. If he wasn't the division's leader, he probably wouldn't even bother showing up. He'd much rather stay home with his cats, or hell, he'd even prefer filling out a mountain of paperwork to this. It wouldn't be the first time he's used "urgent paperwork" as an excuse to get out of going. 

Maybe he'd understand this kind of thing if you were here, Aki thought. Maybe he'd actually enjoy himself. It'd be fun to drink with you. 

So, he decided to ask you to come. There wasn't a doubt in his mind about whether you'd show up, because he knows you, and he knows how you listen to whatever the hell he tells you to do. It wasn't a surprise when he saw you walk in; at 7 o'clock on the dot, too, the exact time Aki told you to arrive. God, you're so perfect. 

Of course he remembers the party. How could Aki forget, considering how he stared at you the entire night? He can't help it, he couldn't stop watching; Aki couldn't take his eyes off of the way you drink, the way you talk and laugh, the way your outfit seems to hug every part of your body just right. People always say they have a hard time looking away from him, and Aki thinks he finally understands what they mean. You're enchanting. 

And how would he not be able to recall how annoyed he was, how genuinely pissed he got when he saw his employees chatting you up? God, his fucking employees; they're too inferior to be trying to talk to you. It made Aki feel a certain kind of anger he hasn't felt in a long, long time. He isn't used to not getting what he wants. 

In the end, although he definitely enjoyed himself more than usual, it was still another bothersome night for him. Next time, he'll stick much closer to you. Aki didn't get many chances to talk to you himself, because every time he tried, he'd be distracted by this co-worker asking him to come take shots, or that co-worker pulling him away to drag him into the latest circle of gossip. By the time he was free, you were already whisked away by someone else. 

It was so irritating. He couldn't care less about any of these people. He just wants you. 

And next time, there won't be anyone to get in his way. Aki has already had some choice words with all of the morons that wouldn't leave you alone. 

It's funny. All he has to do is command them not to talk to you again, and with one sentence, with one look into his eyes, they're not only forgetting about everything they said to you, but they're also obeying him immediately, without a second thought in their heads. Humans are so simple. It's something Aki wishes you would understand. There's no reason for someone like you to be wasting your time with people like that, with people who aren't him. 

Aki glances away, and he tries to hide the tinge of annoyance on his face, he tries to stop the bridge of his nose from knotting up with stress. He replies, "Yes, I remember. What about it?" 

"It's, well, it's..." You stammer, staring up at him sheepishly. Aki can see from the corner of his eye how your expression morphs into embarrassment. He can hear how you're nervously tapping the end of your stamp against the wooden surface of the desk, the sound echoing around the quiet, empty library. Tap, tap, tap. 

Finally, you sigh, willing yourself to speak. "Last night, there was this guy, and I think he was from another division, 'cause I didn't recognize him. But anyway, we were talking all night, and then when we went to leave, he asked me if I would come home with him." 

Aki's back straightens. His heart pounds a little faster, his blood feels like it's boiling. He takes a nice, long drag in from his cigarette to keep himself calm. 

"I said no," You're continuing, and Aki feels a tiny sense of relief; only slight, but enough to make him feel like finally leaning forwards and stamping his spent cigarette out into the ashtray. 

"I'm pretty sure it was good for me to say no, I mean, we both had a lot to drink, and I didn't really want to… you know. But he seemed pretty annoyed by it, and he stopped talking to me after that, he just left. I didn't mean to upset him, but," You look up towards Aki, asking him, "Do you think I should have said yes?" 

Aki crosses his arms over his chest, and he turns to look out the window, just to give himself something to do. The sun is starting to set, casting columns of light into the room, illuminating the flecks of dust floating in the air. Traffic in the city below is bustling, people rushing to get home after they've just gotten off work. 

Fuck, how did someone like that slip past him? Aki kept his eyes on you for the entire night — No, wait. When everyone was starting to leave, he wasn't watching you for a bit. People kept coming up to him to say goodbye, or to thank him for paying everybody's tab, or to ask him if he's going to be busy next week. Aki ended up losing sight of you for a while, until he used his powers to watch you walk home. Goddammit. 

Aki's eyes narrow, and he drums his fingers against his arm. "No, you did the right thing," He replies. He's trying his best to keep his voice resolute, but either way, he doubts you'll notice the anger that lingers in his tone. 

"Stay away from that guy, he has bad intentions. He could get fired for something like that, you know. Do you remember what his name was? What he looked like?" 

"Really?" You shake your head, "No, sorry, sir. I think I had too much to drink. He was," You place your finger on your chin, thinking, "I can't remember his name, but I think he had brown hair? And I'm pretty sure he was from the second division." 

Brown hair, Division 2. Not a lot to work with, but Aki will find him. And when he does, losing his job is going to be the least of his worries. 

You're silent for a moment, before you say, "Sorry, we can get back to work now. I don't know why that was bothering me so much." 

"It's fine. It would upset me, too." 

It already has. It's already pissed him off plenty. Aki feels his face screwing up in anger, he's finding himself absentmindedly cracking the joints on his fingers. 

"Mmm, well," You turn back towards the desk, and you flip to the next page in the stack of papers. "I'm glad you think I did the right thing, at least. Some people can be so pushy, you know? I'd go back to his place with him if he just wanted to talk or something but… I guess I knew what he wanted. And I wasn't interested." 

Aki watches the cars below come to a uniform stop when the light turns red. "And why weren't you?" He asks, without even thinking twice. "Why weren't you interested, I mean. If you don't mind me asking. Was it just because of the drinking, or was there another reason? Were you not attracted to him?" 

"I mean, maybe. He was kind of cute. I just don't want to do something like that with someone unless… I don't know. It feels weird to think about doing it with someone I barely know. Is that stupid?" 

Aki huffs, "You're asking for my opinion again?"

"I like hearing your opinion, sir." 

There's a few seconds of silence as Aki thinks, carefully considering his options. His ringed eyes idly observe the city, his grip tightens on his arm. He takes a deep breath, in, then out, to relax himself. 

"It's not stupid," He answers finally, turning towards you. Once again, you're face to face with his mesmeric, deep stare. Deep enough to practically drown you, mesmerizing enough to keep you rooted in place and compelled to listen. 

"I agree with you. It's a waste to do those sorts of things with someone you have no feelings for. If you want to know how I feel-" 

Aki suddenly takes a step forward. His hand comes to rest on the back of your chair, he leans down to get closer to you. And when he abruptly swivels you in your chair to make you face him, you drop your stamp in surprise. It rolls on the desk until it falls off the edge, hitting the floor. 

"I think," Aki's voice is low, sultry. Resolute, but teasing, almost. It makes your stomach flip, your chest tighten. His eyes stay locked onto yours as he carefully grasps your wrist, his thumb rubbing lazy circles into your skin. 

"I think inappropriate things feel better the more you know your partner." 

"I- You-" You're trying to speak, trying to say something, but the words keep getting caught in your throat, your lips won't stop quivering. He's close, he's so damn close right now — Hayakawa is so close, and it makes you feel like you can hardly breathe, let alone say any words. You can smell the lingering scent of his rich cigarettes, the smell of his fancy cologne. 

Aki swallows before he continues, his voice breathy, "Do you understand? Or would you like me to show you what I mean?" 

"I'm-" You gulp, and your words are trembling, but you still manage to nod your head and stutter out, "Y-Yeah, show me."

"Well, you said it'd be weird to do it with someone you hardly know. It takes a lot of time to understand what's in someone's heart, so, you'll start by observing them." 

Aki glides his hand up from your wrist, all the way up to your palm. His fingers coax your own to unfurl, and when your hand is open, he presses his own against it until you're palm to palm with him, hand flat. "You'll study their hands," Aki says, "Are they large, or small? Cold, warm? How long are their fingers?" 

His hand is huge compared to yours, the shape of his thick fingers eclipsing your own from where your hand is pressed against his. He makes your hand look so, so small. His palms radiate a comforting sort of heat, and his fingers fold over your hand, interlacing tightly with yours. 

You're holding his hand, your hand in Aki's — Your palm is warm, and the realization makes your entire body start to feel hot, too. 

Aki gives you a gentle squeeze. Your hand feels so damn tiny in his own, you're so small compared to him — He hopes you don't notice the way his breath hitches as he grips you tightly. Slowly, he drags your arm up, 'til your fingers are able to meet his ear. 

"How are their ears shaped?" He's asking, and he's guiding your thumb to feel out the shape of his ear, the ridges and dips. Then, he's bringing you a little bit downward, so that between both your fingers, you're fiddling with his circular, metal earring. 

Your breath is starting to get caught in your throat. Aki brings your hand to his lips, and he just barely presses them to the pad of your thumb. They feel soft, a little chapped, and his breath is warm on your skin when he starts to speak. 

"Have you ever had your finger bitten?" 

The setting sun reflects light in Aki's eyes, it casts his face in a shadowy glow. You hastily shake your head in response. Your face feels hot, your hand is starting to shake. Aki grips it tighter to keep it steady. 

Aki mutters, his voice barely more than a whisper, "Remember how it feels. I want you to remember it, so if anyone else does this, you'll be thinking of me." 

Your eyes widen, then they flicker down to fixate on his lips; you watch as they part, staring as he takes the tip of your thumb into his mouth. His teeth close around it, biting down ever-so gently. His tongue lays flat on the underside of your finger, just barely brushing against your skin. 

The clock on the wall ticks, and ticks. Aki bites down a little harder, his expression unreadable. You exhale a long, shaky breath. 

Finally, Aki drags your thumb out of his mouth, your skin slightly damp from his saliva. His lips press to your fingertip in an almost-kiss, before he asks, "Did you memorize it?" 

His voice breaks you from your trance, and your gaze immediately flicks back to meet his eyes. You nod and nervously reply, "Yeah, y-yeah. I did." 

Aki memorized it, too — The shape of your thumb, the hazy look in your eyes, the delicious taste and the intoxicating smell of your skin. He has to memorize it. He wants to know more of you, after all. There's no way he'd ever forget this. 

He keeps his firm grip on your hand, squeezing it gently. His breath is the slightest bit shaky, and his eyelids are drooping, the black of his pupils beginning to swallow the circles of rings in his iris. 

There's a moment of silence between the two of you. Your stamp has long since stopped rolling on the floor, the cars outside are no longer honking in the rush hour traffic. You can only hear the sound of your breathing and his, and the echo of your heartbeat as it pounds in your ears. Just as you swallow the lump forming in your throat, just as you're expecting him to pull away from you, Aki's fingertips brush over your knuckles, and he starts guiding your hand again. 

This time, he's leading it down, down, down, his eyes still locked onto yours, his deep gaze never wavering. Down past his chest, past where his suit jacket is neatly buttoned around his stomach, past his hips and past where his belt sits in the loops of his slacks. All the way down, until your hand is right between his legs, until he's pressing your palm down on his groin, until you can feel the shape of his… 

He's so warm, so thick; Aki guides you to softly squeeze his cock through his slacks, and he utters a quiet groan, his eyelashes fluttering. A heavy look of lust settles behind the rings of his eyes, and his hips shift back to give your arm more room. 

You're fondling him now, feeling how the smooth fabric of his slacks hugs his bulge, feeling the way his dick throbs to a gentle rhythm. He's getting stiffer the longer you touch him, his breath is getting sharper, his expression is growing softer; he looks desperate. And he isn't even fully hard, but he's still so fucking big, so thick and so, it's so — 

The reality of what's been happening suddenly hits you like a freight train — What are you doing, what the hell were you just doing? You're gasping, stumbling back in your chair; it gives under your weight, and you end up falling to the floor, your back hitting the hardwood with an embarrassingly loud thud. 

"Oh, shit-" Aki stands up straight, and in a worried tone of voice, in a tone that sounds completely unaffected by what was just happening mere moments ago, he's asking, "Are you okay? Do you need me to help you up?" 

You're unable to reply, averting your eyes and breathing hard, pushing yourself up to a sitting position and covering your face with your hand. Aki cocks his head at you, before he takes a few steps forwards and kneels down, nice and close. 

His knees are situated on either side of your waist, and he's positioned directly above you, his bangs falling to frame his face. He's close enough that he can examine your embarrassed look, close enough that he can hear your breathing, and close enough to grasp your chin between his fingers, tilting your head up and forcing you to look at him. There's a curious, teasing sort of expression on his face now, his mouth tugged into the slightest shape of a smirk. 

You're adorable, absolutely adorable. You're staring up at him expectantly, desperately, waiting for him to make a move, your breath expelled in short pants, your gaze flickering from his eyes, to his parted lips. 

You're too easy. Aki didn't need to use a single drop of his power, and yet he's certain you've already forgotten all about that idiot from the night before. All you're thinking about is him, just as Aki intended, just as he knew you would. 

Aki leans forward. His face is so close, his lips are mere centimeters away from colliding with yours. His breathing is slow and steady. 

"Aki…"

The way your sweet voice murmurs his name, his first name against his lips almost makes him change his mind. It almost has Aki considering telling you something different from what he planned, it almost has him pushing all the paperwork off the desk in a heap so he can bend you over and take you right then and there. Almost. He's more patient than he appears, and this isn't the right time or the right place for him to have you. Not for the first time, anyways. 

So, he decides to listen to his better judgment. Aki pulls apart from you until he can meet your gaze, and in a stern tone, he commands, "Come on, get up. We need to finish working." 

With his palms pressed to his knees, Aki pushes himself up. He extends a hand to you, and although you hesitate at first, you eventually, nervously take it, allowing Aki to grab you and pull you to your feet. You push your chair back up, you grab your stamp from the floor. The chair squeaks when you sit back down, and you swivel towards the stack of paperwork on the desk. 

Aki leans his back against the window and crosses his legs at the ankles. In the corner of your eye, you see him shoving his hand in his jacket pocket. He pulls out his sky-blue lighter, then his pack of cigarettes, sticking one between his teeth, and striking the wheel of the lighter to expertly bring it to life.  

He inhales: a nice, long drag. Then, he exhales, breathing smoke up towards the ceiling. The rich, familiar smell of his cigarettes begins to fill your lungs, settling your mind. 

For a moment, you briefly wonder if he's going to bring up what just happened at all, or if he's planning on forgetting about it, but before you can go back to your work, his voice suddenly breaks the silence. It puts those questions to rest, and sparks another white hot fire in your heart. 

"I want to leave early tonight," Aki says, fidgeting with his cigarette. "If you can finish your paperwork by eight, I'll reward you. Do we have a deal?" 

thanks @gal-in-blue for infecting me with control devil aki brain worms, ily