#why you gotta make us remember
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#AUUUGH WAILING SCREAMING CRYING SLIDING DOWN THE WALL SOBBING#BROCEDES PLEASE WHY COULDN'T YOU TWO HAVE BEEN NON-FAMOUS#WHY DID YOU DRAG ALL OF US INTO YOUR SITUATIONSHIP#my mom is sick of me wailing about them. nearly collapsed at work when i remembered 'yes... and team-mate'#sliver springs is going platinum in my house rn#how can you be childhood friends and just fall apart like that? i think about falling out with tas like that and i go nearly catatonic#yeah you're a 7x wdc winner and you got the one wdc that you wanted but was it worth it? was this loss worth it? would you do it again?#going by the interviews they probably would and that's why they fell out in the first place. i literally cannot imagine caring about some#trophy over my childhood best friend but like i guess that's why they're pro level athletes and i'm in my room posting about them#anyway what the fuck was up during f1 photographers during their fallout? why is every photo of them cinematic? did you know we'd be using#them? did you know we'd go crazy? or were you also like 'oh this is cinema in the making. i gotta capture this.'?#anyway for all of that want to know where the quote is from‚ it's jacob black from twilight when bella is getting turned into a vamp#stephanie meyer had one (1) banger line and it was this#brocedes#brocedes edit#f1 edit#f1 web weaving#nico rosberg#lewis hamilton#nr6#lh44#formula 1#web weaving#please ignore my absolutely atrocious photo editing skills. thank you imgflip!!
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me: i’m gonna make sure i remember to take my meds properly
my doctors office: actually we’re gonna just… not refill that for a while. yeah, you can call all you want. we’ll say we’re working on it and then not do it. enjoy the withdrawals, bitch
#crying#no seriously i’m so mad#i FINALLY started feeling better after remembering to take my meds#and now i’m out of them and my dr is a piece of poo#i’m now on day three of no mood stabilizers:)#i’ll admit tho that between this one and my antidepressant#the withdrawal from the antidepressant is MUCH WORSE#like i get intensely sick when i don’t take it#this one is just making me tingly and on edge and not sleeping well#i can’t focus for the life of me#i just wanna lay in bed :(#fuck the us healthcare system#why you gotta be that way#just give me the pills i’ve been taking for the better part of a DECADE why do we go through this like every three fucking months#it’s just never easy with this shit#sorry about the rambles
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Hywel is inspired by a mix of my issues with stories with nonhuman protagonist/about nonhumans becoming human AND vet posts ive seen warning people about the dangers of anthropomorphisizing animals. Its fine to joke about your pets doing things out of spite or other human emotions, it does put you at risk of not being able to read their body language correctly. Cats dont cry out of sadness, a cat crying, with actual tears streaming down its face, is a sign of a medical issue. A dog smiling isn't doing it bc its happy, it means its nervous. Not being able to spot these is bad, and sometimes even dangerous, for you and the animal.
If you never get past Hywel's human appearance and treat him like one its like getting a reactive dog, doing zero research or training, and then taking it to a dog park. If Hywel mauls someone in town then its on you.
#hywel struggles a lot with good vs bad things specifically#he makes decisions based on what makes him feel good or bad (like most people) but#if you explain something being bad to him using emotional reasons (it makes you a bad person‚ its an awful thing to do‚ its gross)#he genuinely will not get it#he'll try to stop! just bc he was told to stop! but he doesn't know how to apply it to other situations#murder for example#he's immortal death doesnt have the same meaning to him#and he doesn't particularly care about people outside of arisen#they're entertaining he finds them fun. they're critters to him#but he's not bothered by them dying#arisen dying is bad bc it means he failed his charge. he cant die. regular people dying? eh whatever#so he doesn't really get why murder is bad#if ur in vernsworth and tell him no then he'll be like i dont understand but ok!!#its only bad in vernsworth bc thats where you said no at!! everywhere else is fine !#he's not trying to find loopholes!!! he genuinely doesn't get it and is doing his best to work with what he's given!!!#his way of thinking is p straightforward and logical though#so you have to explain stuff by how it effects him and how the cons of doing it outweigh the benefits#hywel u cant murder people you dont like bc if we allowed that people would kill merchants and then you couldn't buy stuff#anyway bonus scifi au stuff while im here#hywel would remember the time loops and would do whatever it takes to keep the crew safe#but the thing is. cosmic horror hywel doesn't really understand time or how the loops are fucking people up#he knows the false dawn losing its crew was bad. he doesn't understand WHY its bad‚ but he knows it is#and he loves this crew! theyre funny and some of them are fun to chew on. enrichment.#he's gonna do whateve it takes to keep this crew safe and together. on the ship. y'know‚‚‚ bc the other ship losing its crew was bad#restarting a loop means nothing to him. yeah he's gotta start over with his friendships but thats fun! enrichment!#hes a creature time means nothing to him#beginning of the loop all his friends are here :^) he's completely unaware of how its negatively effecting people#anyway i cannot stress enough he isn't doing this to be malicious he's just doing his best#someone would absolutely realize he was doing this early on and if you tell him to stop he will#but yeah better hope you can explain why he cant do that well enough or hywels gonna unintentionally find every loophole
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decided to play the heirs of fate dlc this weekend (ive been meaning to for awhile; admittedly my knowledge of it all comes from browsing the wiki, and i really wanted to experience the anankos characterization for myself). this isn't even the part i was excited to get to BUT I AM REELING OVER IT..........FOR REASONS I WILL DISCLOSE IN THE TAGS (from part iv: light's sacrifice)
#during shigure's explanation about why there's gaps in the kids' memories my brain IMMEDIATELY flipped to krad's post about whether --#gunter actually remembers how much he loved his family/is the revenge really for them or is it more so for his own satisfaction --#and like. OH MY GOD. IS IT NOT SO UTTERLY CRUEL THAT PERHAPS THE TRANSITION OF HIS REVENGE BEING FOR THEM ---> BEING SO FOR HIM WAS IN --#FACT BY ANANKOS' DESIGN ALL ALONG RATHER THAN JUST AN UNFORTUNATE SIDE EFFECT OF THE POSSESSION..........#gunter honey you may have been more under his thrall than you realized#this would totally align with how he's only able to tell corrin about his family once he's free from the possession. cuz anankos is no --#longer deliberately stealing his memories to make him more willing to act on his behalf.......ough........#of course i still think gunter purposefully indulged in that power from anankos.......latching onto it as an opportunity to exact his --#revenge without really being aware of all the consequences that would coincidence along with that#and of course this is just a lil tidbit for my own self insert lore but if anankos stealing memories is a thing he purposefully does to --#make his victims more malleable that would explain why he would not remember his time in askr or leigh upon returning to the world of --#revelation :''''') and perhaps it would slowly come back to him post game#teehee. having many thoughts. brain exploding. typical behaviour.#once again fates storytelling is fucking exceptional like is it not brilliant that the degenerating dragon who has lived among his people -#far longer than one likely should. and has been scorn by those ppl he so loved as now their memories of him are only full of fear and --#hatred. ends up stealing people's memories to make them more useful in his plan to destroy the world. much like how his own memories have -#been lost to time. and he is a victim to time just like anybody else. OUGH AAAAA MY HEART MY BRAIN IM SO SAD ABOUT FATES AGAIN.#anyways i still gotta play part 5 of the dlc but im saving that for either tonight or tmrw
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and the award for weirdest sleep goes to...
#todays gonna be a weird i think#might delete socials for a bit#i had a VIVID dream me and one of my mutuals were trying to buy a new Tolkien appendix book or something. new Middle Earth book#and we discovered even opening the book slightly caused us immense eye pain so i confronted the clerk like#WTF IS WRONG WITH YOUR BOOKS#and she was like THOSE HAVE BEEN CURSED GET OUT GET OUT YOU CAN ONLY READ THEM IF YOU PERSONALLY EMBROIDER THE PAGES WITH THE TEXT#and she had like. embroidery kits for the damn book#anyway. that's like the 4th night in a row ive slept badly so.#gonna delete socials and just focus on 1. adding books to librarything. 2. setting up the aerogarden. and 3. finishing this book#i wanted today to be a chill relaxed don't bother with plans day but i think my brain needs a strict to do list lol#also gonna make cabbage rolls for supper. side note the label on that box is REALLY cute ill try and remember to post a photo#not sure if ill make my intended cocktail for tonight. i thought i was sleeping poorly bc i was drinking them before bed but i only had tea#last night and slept worse than ever so. idk. i already have half the ingredients for it...#anyway. the coffeepot is done so i gotta stop rambling and do something#oh side note i found where i went wrong with my budget yesterday LOL i calculated everything monthly EXCEPT my groceries#only added the biweekly/per paycheck number for those which is why i had so much 'extra'#WHOOPSIES#so i gotta redo that and it's actually going to look PRETTY BAD not PRETTY GOOD so
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I wonder how many tags i can add on to this
#there must be SOME kind of a limit otherwise posts would get suuuuuuper duper long like is it just 30?#idk but i'm going to find out by simply maxxing out the character limit for each tag and finding out the limit of tags for each post lololo#this is gonna be great. i just have to remember to type without ever using the comma. it shouldn't be too hard right? fuck i almost typed#the comma i'm already bad at this smh my head. also if your still here i commend you. you have a better attention span than i do.#i'm already starting to get bored holy shit this is not happening. i gotta power through this. FOR SCIENCEEEEEEEEEE. or somethinggggggggggg#but fr idk what else to say. maybe just saying that i don't know what to say will be good enough? but does that even count?#I don't even know anymore. ffffffffuck. this is gonna be a while huh? also holy shit if you're still here omg u deserve like. a prize or#something because u definitely didn't have to stay and read all of this bull shit. lololol i typed out bs but decided to just spell the who#thing out just to make it go by faster. i'm so lazy. this is only the nineth tag HOW will i make it to 30. i am sobbing the adhd is adhding#very hard rn. are you still here? bruh this is insane. i have somehow managed to keep ur attention this long and it's just me spouting#absolute balderdash. wait do you know what balderdash even means? i don't care if you do already i'm gonna tell you anyway. balderdash is#basically just another word for nonsense. boom. you learned something new today. balderdash equals nonsense equals this damn post.#why did i decide to do this in the first place. it was a dumb idea. i don't know if i can even keep going. this is only the *counts tags*#it's the 14th tag. we've got a long way to go boys. men. soldiers. comrads. friends. besties peeps. marshmallows.#where was i going with this? oh yeah. trying to max out the limit for tags. dang i almost typed a comma there. i haven't done that since#i think the third or fourth tag. dang that feels like such a long time ago. not for you guys probably. it feels longer because i have to li#type it all out and stuff. so it's definitely gonna feel longer for me. are you still here? good lord don't you have better things to#be doing than reading all of this? we're already on tag number 18. it feels like i should be on the thirtyeth by now. or however it's spell#'toast' you might be wondering 'why are you typing out the names of the numbers instead of say '9' or '5'?' well you see. young one.#this is a strategy i'm using to make each tag slightly longer. even if i don't know how to spell it. it'll make it just a little bit longer#anyway. i got off topic. not that there was ever a topic to begin with. unless it's about making this as long as i can.#which i am apparently good at doing. i guess. are you STILL here? do you seriously have nothing to do? i guess i'm flattered you stayed thi#whole time. instead of reading something else you stayed here. with me. listening to me talk. on the twenty-third tag. oh yeah its tag 23#except now it's tag twenty-four. how crazy is that. this little talk is almost over. only 6 tags away if memory serves right. this's strang#i kind of don't want this to end. but i know it should. after all there is a limit. but all things must come to and end at some point i gue#i'm running out of things to say. it's probably a good thing it's almost over. hahahahah............... but i don't want to go. i don't wan#to leave this post. i've worked so hard on it. and for what. just for it to end. are you still here? yes? good. i'd hate to end this alone.#thank you for indulging me and my craziness. the end is only 2 tags away now. you can go ahead and leave. i'll be okay on my own. really...#...you're still here? i- i don't know what to say. i suppose a toast is in order. perhaps. for this journey. this stupid dumb post i though#would be fun. i'll make it short. it's the last tag after all. this was fun. but i will never do it again. so long as a i live. i'll miss y
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yea
#txt#i gotta bitch rq cos im pissed sorry guys#i hate tht u dont remember none of the shit u did. i hate tht u make jokes about it even. i hate tht it feels like im always the one#to wear the burden of iron wrought weights so tht u can learn how to mellow out and not do the same to my sister#‘you opened up a lot of doors for your sister’#yea cool im glad u chilled out and didnt also kick my sister out of the house while she was 1200 miles away with nothing but the clothes on#her back. yea cool im glad u didnt threaten disowning when she got a piercing. yea im glad she didnt have to sit thru the ordeal of u when#i first came out to u. im glad she didnt have to have our dead dad used as a damn weapon against her when she told you shes a lesbian#im glad you never sat her down and berated her for being queer for three hours and then sent her to her hole only to send her a long winded#email about how awful she is to you for being queer and how no one will be able to recognize or love her#i still have that email btw#im glad you came to me to ask for help when she was suicidal depressive instead of blaming her and insulting her and making awful#assumptions and insinuations about her#im glad you asked for help for her#but why couldnt you have been a mom to me too#why did i have to teach you all the wrong ways to handle situations so that you could handle them rigjt with her#why did i have to be the one to lockpick all of the doors in order to open them for her#whyd you have to put the locks on there in the first place#why werent you ever a mom to me#why wasnt i allowed to have parents growing up#whyd you have to hurt me since the time before i could make cohesive thought#why werent you a mom for either of us until you realized how heavily you screwed up with me#why did it take you losing me completely for you to start being a mom to my sister?#why did it take you losing me completely for you to finally listen to me instead of talk about why im wrong#im glad to have a mom now#but i couldve used a mom when i was a kid#why do you have to turn it into jokes#and why am i not allowed to be upset
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[ Nikke spoilers for mid September 2024 update mini story / my comments on it. ]
Closeted trans dudes dressing up at the family function like:
It's such a familiar scene, for family to see you dressing up out of obligation and then being like, 'Oh, NOW you're so beautiful, you should do this more often.' And internally, your body is screaming that it feels so wrong, why did you perform your perceived gender for this event! Or like, for me personally too, the whole missing the vibe of the event and dressing up way more than anyone else, and then feeling so out of place. I've joked before about Red Hood having older brother vibes, maybe she has trans vibes for me too now, lol.
Also, strange that Liliweiss is saying 'for the future' to Red Hood. Who, y'know, is basically terminally ill (corrupted). Red Hood doesn't 'have' a future, she just has the present and past. At this point in this mini-story thing (I'm assuming it takes place around the time of the Red Ash event), is Liliweiss aware of the plans to integrate Red Hood into Rapi, and therefore 'have' a future? Or am I just reading into this way too much? Lol. Just sounded like a really weird and inconsiderate thing to say to her.
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That aside, why the fuck did y'all vote the dress over the other two Red Hood skins?! I'm so disappointed, the other two were way cooler and not out of character:
((I mean, I guess it's technically in-character since it's canon now, and has to do with 'old music' but c'mon, man...))
Image description below cut:
First image: Red Hood from Nikke: Goddess of Victory is in a strappy and revealing dress. It's the same colour as her hair. She's embarrassed and standing next to a gramophone, while holding a champagne glass. She is also wearing fingerless half-palm leather gloves. Text: Red Hood: Oh jeez, I can't do this! I just can't!
Next two images: Text: Dialogue:
Commander: You did well in that outfit.
Red Hood: Anything was better than staying at that party, even fighting raptures. I've never been so glad to have a bunch of them show up.
Rapunzel: Your dress is all dirty, though. And the hem is all torn...
Red Hood: Who cares? It's not like I'm going to be wearing this ever again.
Liliweiss: Why not? I thought you'd be keeping it for the future.
Red Hood: No thanks. Not a chance.
Snow White: That's too bad. At least I finally got to see you all dressed up. Can I at least take a picture for posterity?
Red Hood: Absolutely not. I don't want to leave any evidence of this humiliating sight.
Last three images are the Red Hood skins/appearances that we voted on. First image is the feminine dress with the gramophone mentioned before, which won the poll. Second image is Red Hood on a motorcycle with a leather jacket, crop top, mini shorts, and thigh highs. Third image is Red Hood standing next to a wolf, and she is wearing form-fitted high-rise pants, a strappy harness bra-top and collar, and a cropped blazer.
#we couldve had a better mini story than performative femininity#nikke#red hood#red hood nikke#goddess of victory: nikke#nikke goddess of victory#nikke spoilers#CoriPlaysNikke#Cori Plays Nikke#idr which tag i use lol#Cori.exe#Post.exe#Image.exe#long post#i cant remember if i voted bike or wolf lol the vote i cast was on june 27 and its currently sept 21 so it was a while ago...#...and the link i RTed doesn't tell me which one i voted (usually i try to put a screenshot as a reply but i must have forgotten)#i DEFINITELY did not vote the out of character strappy dress lmao wtf#tbh im keeping her default skin on but its nice they gave us a mini story for it at all#also lmao @ rapunzel looking for the commanders mags. neon already found em (neons personal story) and theyre gay mags (bless)#i mean unless im misremembering that im super tired rn and ive been typing this post for a while and have more to say on another post#other post TBA im too tired to make that one rn. actually i have a lot of nikke things i want to post but i keep forgetting lol#just expect more i have a lot i wanna commentate on but its 1am and i still gotta shower tonight#lol lemme stop nitpicking this post#but yeah the story was like. oh man. ive done that before. countless times. it sucks. i got hella secondhand embarrassment...#...bc ive been there before. in feminine clothes and shit. and ppl suddenly like u a lot more...#...and its like. guys. this is basically a costume. its not who i am. no im not gonna wear a fucking dress all the time.#and it sucks bc it aint safe to come out to justify why you dont wanna look like that all the time. (not that ppl should Have to justify it)#let ppl wear stuff thats ooc and treat it normally dont hound them about it like this bc then it becomes a nightmare
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Playing Bomb rush cyberfunk has been a crazy experience so far because i feel like I've been enjoying the game just as much as I'm not doing so
#which is crazy because i went in with the impression that this would be jet set radio but better#and really? the biggest thing is doing for me rn is making me wanna play old-school Jet set radio again#who the fuck looked at Jsr and thought “Hey you know what would make this game even better? 300 different inputs”#which makes it impossible for me to play this solely on the controler (the main way i play games since i suck ass at the keyboard)#because it just doesn't have that many buttons#so at times i gotta be fucking double welding this shit with both the keyboard and the controler and it's awful#because I don't have that good of a motor coordination or whatever the proper term is#on top of that. why did we need a fighting mechanic? that's so fucking unnecessary when Jsr already had a gret way of dealing with that#which was by integrating the grafitti mechanic with the fighting by having it be the way you damage opponents#just adjust that to make it take more hits/graffitis in the fight and boom. you're done. perfectly functional#all it does is take away 3 BUTTONS in a game that already has a shit load of inputs#and ik these same buttons are also used to doing tricks on rails but like. that's such an useless addition#because I'm not actually doing anything like this isn't pulling a move on a fighting game. no skill is needed. I'm just mashing buttons#so you might as well not have both of these machanics and have the buttons be set to do other. more important comands#like the one to manually continue a combo on the ground after getting off of a rail. i gonna hold control on the keyboard and move#my joysticks at the same time whenever i need that and it fucking sucks#so yeah whenever i play it again I'm definitely gonna try mapping my controler to my liking and we'll see how it goes#unrelated to the gameplay i just gotta say. sorry but the songs are so mid#if i knew how to mod things i would replace every single one of them songs from jsf and jsrf. absolutely no doubt about it#like the songs in the jsr games are so unique and distinct from one another. even the ones that have a similar style. which makes them#incredibly memorable like i still remember a good chunk of them from the top of my head and i haven't played that game in months#bomb rush cyberfun songs just feel so samey and forgettable#a similar thing can be said for the environment designs and especially their colors imo#everything within the same area feels incredibly samey and not memorable. and you may think “Carol it's a whole area of course it's gonna#look similar to itself“ and to that i say. yes. cohesion is important but take a look at Kogane and Bento from jsr and you'll see#how despite being the same area and having the a coherent color pallet and overlay applied to it their locations are distinct from eachother#and memorable to the point where i can recall how to traverse thought each area and where they lead to easily#in bomb rush it feels like I'm just looking at the same place everywhere in the map#on a good note! i like the story so so much it's definitely what's gonna cary me through playing the whole game#because jsr really needed more story and fleshed out characters that aren't just different designs you can play as
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too much manic energy rn. put on don angle
#this cd is wild it’s like. duke ellington. the beatles. the most beautiful melancholic drag you ever heard. original composition. beatles.#did I hunt this down because I fell head over heels in love with minor drag? mayhaps.#hey remember that post I went off in the tags in a few days ago being like I GOTTA WRITE THE PAH SECTION AAAAAA#so it turns out I’ve been procrastinating on that#made a nice plot and read a bunch of stuff in the meantime but oh hey I still gotta write this section#maybe frenetic harpsichord will help me focus#I don’t want to work on my thesis I want to write school of the air scripts and make little trinkets#why is it so difficult to work on the things I actually Need to do ;A;#also?????? people (or one person at least) is demonstrably excited about the Ptáček rp????????#why is my reaction to being perceived to be simultaneously excited and embarrassed this is stupid lmao just be excited it’s allowed#(points at self) say hi in the discord!!!!! tell them you’re pleased they like it!!!!!!!! be normal!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#idk idk my ears feel warm just thinking about this that’s so dumb lol why am I having a physiological reaction to this#also still losing my mind from Box!!!!! this was so nice I’m gonna cry omg#should see if I have any sheet metal hmmmm#cannot make anything requiring soldering or casting but I can still do some things…….#okay okay I gotta get back to writing I’m meeting with my advisor at 4 aaaaaa#using music and manic energy and methylphenidates to get this section done 🥲#putting those in my acknowledgements btw
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because im less breakable than you
#still dont really remember the details of how this ends but still thinking they couldve made laura vampire instead of carmilla human#also keep thinking - as with all the things recently idk why this is a thing now but i gotta keep thinking abt it - that canonically#carmilla died at 18#laura is 19#actresses are 25ish here? it's not a big difference but it is...a little difference#theyre teenagers#they look like teenagers#she fucking died at her first ball hoping to make her first ever friend it's so sad really#but i was thinking abt this too with the iwtv episode where claudia asks armand to turn madeleine and he goes to question her#like certain lines are just so very specifically written i think and they hit so much harder if you adjust their ages mentally#claudia looks 14. shes from 1903 so shes around 40-45 years old?#madeleine's actress is 30ish i believe and i think madeleine is meant to be a similar age#but she looks kind of young. i guess 30 is pretty young actually#armand in the show was turned at 27? assad zaman is 34? close enough i guess you dont have to adjust that much#but in the book hes turned at 17?#like just some lines really hit#when claudia calls madeleine 'some weird white lady i met by happenstance'#imagine a 14 yo talking abt a 30 yo instead of two people who look similar in age#when madeleine calls armand young man when shes like theres nothing left of my era theres been a war#i think she says like 'young man theres been a war'#that 'young man' really hits if you imagine him 17#idk#also still thinking abt yaz. if she looked 19#idk. teenage vampires man#also been reading the book and forever5yo claudia is fascinating too i love her#also can they do telepathy in the book bc i feel like a lot of times in the book it's that claudia is being carried by louis like a 5yo#that she whispers stuff in his ear. and thats always the kind of stuff that in the show they'd use telepathy for#it's a good solution both ways i lik eboth but it made me wonder did they just add the telepathy in entirely in the show?#bc i dont believe theres been any so far in the book
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Randomly remembered the half-reason i call my oc-verse by the name it has while laying in bed. One-half of the reason i still knew, but I had forgotten what had truly, really cemented it jointly until now
(it was a song from my favourite band I haven't listened to in a while.)
(the song fit so well at the time, still does, that i needed to hold onto it for the main protagonists forever, by partially naming their story in reference.)
Does this explanation make any sense? Does anyone know why I'm tearing up remembering this. Aahh
#(I'm emotional because I've been feeling bad about it all lately. enjoying things I make I mean—art or ocs or frivilous things.)#(So remembering that song and when it came out. That I couldn't see them in person. But i held onto it my own way. As something I loved)#(Something I still do love a lot... Parts of me saying no—you don't hate it. No. I'll help you remember more. I'm a little misty about it.)#The song is just The Killers - Run For Cover. I couldn't see them in person all those years ago—family went without me.#All my new oc rework with Zin and Hunter and Caia were like a year old or so.#It's a little silly. But the character Zin's derived from was a lightning mage so I stuck to it—I like monhun's zinogre for what its worth#So there's recurring theme and imagery. Thunder's not lightning but the sound and the feeling after the flash the flame and strike.#There's that meaningful thought—the story is the aftermath of a big tragedy. It matches what I like in monsters and other chars.#And at that time—my favourite band I missed out on puts out a really good song I download everywhere and it goes like:#He motioned me to the sky/ I heard heaven and thunder cry/ Run for cover/ Run while you can baby don't look back/ You gotta run for cover#And it goes on of course. The rest of the song's still really good. There's more that fits but point is; More evocative imagery.#So there. Why my bundle of OCs—Zinadia Hunter and Caia's story—is called Thunder 20XX. minus the 20XX. That's tongue-in-cheek#About some day I'll manage to make something tangeable or broadly shareable with them. I guarentee this century!#Thunder... oh my darling Thunder. Eight years man. More than that if I really want to count pre-rework INTO the complete original work. but#I like that it's definably 8. I like that I remembered I've always loved them a lot. Always been my thing to lean on even by name...#I need to get to sleep. Ive gotten a little more emotional over one song than I'd rather regularly be. Give it a listen maybe? Goodnight#Armour clanking#I need an oc tag#What have you gathered to report to your progenitors?🎶Are your excuses any better than your senator's��He held a conference#and his wife was standing by his side🎶He did her dirty but no-one died🎶#I saw Sonny Liston on the street last-night black-fisted and strong singing🎶Redemption song🎶#He motioned me to the sky🎶I heard heaven and thunder cry🎶RUN FOR COVER#What are you waiting for—a kiss or an apology?🎶You think by now you'd have an A in toxicology🎶#It's hard to pack the car when all you do is shame us🎶Even harder when the dirtbag's famous🎶#I saw my mother on the street last night all pretty and strong singin🎶The road is long🎶#I said 'Mama I know you tried!'🎶But she fell on her knees and cried🎶RUN FOR COVER#Just run for cover - you've got nothin left to lose...
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My sister’s graduation day 😤 let’s go 👏🏽
#gosh it’s gonna be a long day and I’m running on two hours of sleep again#i only get the chance to work at night because I don’t have ✨privacy✨#and I’ve been going to bed late and waking up even more tired than usual and my mom’s been scolding me for it#and now I’ve had to tell her what I’m doing and I feel like I just gave another piece of me away again#everything I am everything I do has to be for other people#im so tired when will I give my last piece away 🥹#this was to make ME proud of ME I was doing it for myself and now I feel like it’s for her#and then she’s going to tell my dad and now it’s for him too#also I can’t even cry about it because she HAS to know why I’m upset#she keeps glancing up at me and talking to me in bits#all I have left is my emotions 🥹#anyhow sorry to start the day off so gloomy and depressing I have literally nothing to be sad about I’m very privileged#sorry you guys see me being a baby constantly 🥺 I really do have a good life and shouldn’t be complaining#here’s to a better day for us all#melifails#now i feel like a jerk subjecting you all to this😭 sorry sorry let’s move on#im gonna be a busy bee hopefully I can squeeze in a time for a nap#😭 I don’t waaaaaannnnnaaa sit for hours in the California heat MAYBE with the sun hitting us in the face#our football field is NOT kind in this way#hopefully my sister gets the shady side but even then the sun will hit us in the face eventually just not as long#im !!! excited!!!! I bought ice cream for today 👏🏽 I originally bought choco chip and minto moose tracks?? my sister loves mint flavor#so I bought mint Oreos too so she can eat them with her ice cream 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽#i assume we’re getting take out of some sort so that; ice cream; and uuuuuuu I don’t remember anything else I bought; my best friend did#bring us snacks yesterday!!! pretzels and cookies!!! so that!!!#okay brain no work no more I gotta get dressed love you muah muah muah
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I truly do understand the fear people have regarding people doing “fanfiction commissions” and making money off fanfics after the Anne Rice debacle, but we don’t have to act like it’s an inherent moral failing and like you’re a Fake Fan tainting fan spaces if you want to be paid for your work the same way fan artists do.
Anne Rice is a dick head for what she did and should be treated as such, treating the fear she’s wrought as some holy thing is fucking weird.
#I genuinely used to think this way too but there’s no reason fan artists are allowed to be paid for their art and fanfic writers can’t#Most people who act this way essentially just admit they think writers do less work than fan artists and you gotta fuck off with that#There’s this idea that fanfics are just rip offs of the original work and that is so tremendously rarely the case#Most fanfic is borderline unrelated to the og media#And it’s always worth remembering that 1) copyright laws are really just for protecting major IPs to shit on the little guy#And 2) what someone is willing to pay for is not for you to decide the og creator would never have seen that money anyways because#They’re not producing the type of content being paid for in the same way buying fanart with a distinctive look and ship wouldn’t have gone#To the og#There’s always capitalistic shit that goes too far but fanfics has already experienced that in the form of trash 1D & HP fanfics being made#Into published novels and feature films so what really has you being so weird about small writers trying to experience being paid#For their work#I know fan artists get copyright strikes and things like that but the attitude towards it is not even remotely the same#And I’m not saying you shouldn’t remind people WHY you can’t safely do fanfic commission#But don’t act like “It’s a good thing actually” or morally wrong to want to be paid for fanfiction writing#I feel like I make a post like this every couple of years but I always see that shit pop up sporadically#And the vibes of the posts giving the warning are always RANCID.
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time a flat circle why the hell am i usin the same loafers i bought for one cosplay of my fave antagonist for another fave antagonist
#snap chats#can i even call it cosplay. why are police sirens going off in the bg oh my god shut UP#anyway yeah ill elaborate. Super Snap Stalkers will remember my p4 era and will remember the time i did in fact do an adachi cosplay#i deleted the og post like an hour later. plus that blog's gone. but im sure some freak can find it if they dig hard enough#ew i think i was 17/18 in that pic (not at all that long ago) ok anyway.#i use the same loafers for my aoki outfit. and yeah i do Regularly wear my rgg outfits i TOLD YOU its functional cosplay i QUIT#just funny that like.... damn everything always goes back to square one LOL#these busted ass old ass loafers still rockin with me years later#if im feeling cheeky i think i will post all my rgg outfits actually. for halloween#hang on gotta be depressed and cringe for a moment#cause ive always liked cosplay but whenever i did it it never felt. Good Looking#like i always just felt like my face never worked for the charas i wanted to portray and so thats why i say with a heavy heart#that aoki's round-ass square-ass head is perfect LOL it makes me wanna throw up looking in the mirror#i got the same weird lips. ok not that squished Similar but Its Awful that he makes me feel comfortable with my face now#at least my eyebags arent double deckered... i at least look like i get sleep.. some days.#breaking !!!! objectively one of the most vile bitches in this franchise makes you feel comfortable with your body and existence#NAW to continue from last post if i had a webcam i prob coulda done a cosplay y7 stream LOL thatd be funny#anyway since this tag ramble is just pure cringe let me round it off with a final bit of cringe#the Forbidden Mention of my trans masato hc cause one reason why i have a Teehee over the thought is how raspy his voice is#and i only really now realized how right i was tonight because my prof called on me to speak and when i tried speaking DAWG.#the forbidden acknowledgement of Myself GROSS#BUT DAWG MY THROAT WAS FUCKIN CRUSTY it felt like sandpaper EW?? WATER FOR YOU?? christ. i hope that was just a one-time thing#ok im leaving now BYE
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#one problem that's got me right now; aside from my stomach audibly churning wanting something more; is no one listens#people try to listen; and people think they listen; but they don't actually listen#there's always advice to be given; there's always their own perspective to be imposed on things#and everyone means well; everyone's real damn caring you know? that's part of why I don't just say this shit#but no one actually listens#...why is it that so often when I listen to people they're like 'Exactly!'; but when people listen to me it's like... you didn't hear me?#am I just pickier? or when I listen is it that I go broader strokes and avoid advice?#I'll often take a shot in the dark just based on looking inward and seeing how I'd be feeling in that situation#and... and this isn't a brag or something; but I can't remember the last time someone didn't feel validated by it#(which must be blindness on my part; I must have missed the times I made people feel more alone)#(I certainly don't always even manage to find something worthwhile to say; but when I do people seem validated)#but that's me turning inwards and just presenting how the situation makes me feel; and that making people feel seen#(like once again; not fucking bragging; but people will act like I saw right through them)#(when I was just tossing out something that I was only like 70% sure of and felt probably insulting or something)#but then I complain that people impose their own perspectives when talking to me... when me doing that seems to be what works#so why the fuck is that? is it that I more use myself as a thing to look at to relate to them while not really giving advice?#is my real complaint more like 'no one seems able to listen without trying to offer advice'?#also like... no one seems able to like... fucking trust me; or think for a second I might have lived this shit (possibly longer than them)#like... in a non emotional example:#once was talking about how I gotta heat my room with an electric radiator and the person starts telling me about how I gotta do it#like '3 ft away from any object' type advice and it's like...#I've been doing this for like 4 years; radiator sits about 6-8 inches from my bed and the cat spot; wood never gets more warm than sunlight#like I'm no fucking guru on it; but please don't treat me like and idiot you need to teach when you haven't actually used this stuff#why the hell can't anyone trust me? I got myself a fucking house; you know? why is it always always always advice#I'll talk about a situation; be doing more or less all anyone can do; all you have to say is 'yeah fuck that asshole'#no no; advice on what I need to tell someone about how to deal with that asshole that's not as nuanced as what I'm already doing#you share your biggest fears and just get fucking advice that won't work on how you can fix them#...kinda makes me want to blow my brains out as much as the hunger does right now#wish someone would mimic me on this; cause I seem to know what I'm doing#'gee sorry to hear that; that sort of thing is hard to deal with; you're doing a good job getting through it'
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