#why cant he love himself!!!
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iamnotdirtylaundry · 4 months ago
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my honest reaction to those triple goddess previews where percy's self-deprecating and angsty and annabeth's friends are acting like he's not good enough for her
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fairsweetlonging · 4 months ago
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time travel au where liu qingge and shen qingqiu (yuan) end up accidentally traveling a decade back in time before luo binghe was amitted to qing jing peak and before shen qingqiu had his qi deviation, but after their generation has risen to peak lords.
which means, shen yuan realizes quickly, as they're accosted by said peak lords, that he will have to face shen jiu.
as they're being cleared for demonic energy and the likes, mu qingfang of course instantly detects the poison without a cure eating away at shen yuan's meridians. liu qingge pulls a copy of the treatment plan out of his sleeve (shen yuan blushes a bit, did liu qingge always keep that on hand?), and just like in the current timeline, they agree to keep it under wraps.
shen jiu tries various times to get a moment alone with shen yuan, but he never quite manages because liu qingge is there, who is also... nice?? to him?? for some reason?? shen jiu gets a bit flustered at the solemn politeness and skitters off.
it comes out pretty quickly that shen yuan has "memory loss", and thus can't remember anything that's currently taking place in this time. shen yuan expects scorn, hatred and disdain from shen jiu, expects to be grabbed and interrogated, to arouse suspicion.
but shen jiu looks....... sad???
being transported here threw shen yuan's qi off-balance (even liu qingge had to sit down, which means it's bad), and his cultivation is already so unstable, so when the peak lords are all squabbling and arguing and threatening and raising their voice, he can feel his body shut down. he sees yue qingyuan start to move towards him, which, knowing the future yue qingyuan, he really isn't up for right now—but before the sect leader can get to him someone else is at his back, transferring him qi, holding him up gently by his shoulders, then coaxing him up, leading him outside
shen yuan's been fed qi by every peak lord at least once. he doesn't recognize this one. that means it can only be one person.
he looks up. it's shen jiu.
and it's bizarre, getting fussed over by the scum villain, having gentle hands run along his back, his hair, that clear, soothing voice calming him down. and somehow shen jiu knows exactly what to do?? somehow it works perfectly on him?? it's almost as if shen jiu has known him his whole—
oh.
bodies, like homes, hold memories, even if the original occupants are no longer there. it's the milestone marks on the doorpost that chart a child's growth, blurry photographs faded by time, scuffed floors from well-walked paths, and tiny holes in the walls where pictures once hung.
shen jiu takes him to the bamboo house, pours him tea, and asks, calmly, what he remembers from their childhood.
it's not his childhood, so shen yuan doesn't actually remember anything, but the body he's in does. the memories it holds are emotional rather than visual; he remembers being alone, scared, and hungry. he remembers anger, pain. a dark room. loud voices. he remembers his heart skipping a beat when heavy boots stomp his way. the sound of a whip.
he doesn't have to lie. the memories aren't his own, and they're from long ago, which means shen jiu has them too. and, he supposes, this is his only chance to find out what really happened.
but shen jiu doesn't say anything about it. he just nods and stares, intensely. then he asks shen yuan if he remembers yue qingyuan. shen yuan says no, he doesn't. the conversation takes a very strange turn after that. shen yuan can't help but feel a little queasy when shen jiu asks him if yue qingyuan has taken advantage of his memory loss.
"has he come into your home? has he brought you gifts, sweets? does he invite you for tea? did you accept?"
he has. shen yuan doesn't know why that would be a problem, the sect leader has been nothing but kind and helpful and patient. and generous, too.
when he says yes shen jiu looks furious.
liu qingge (his one) comes to pick him up, and his time with shen jiu is cut short. somewhere he's glad, cuddling into liu qingge's back as he holds him while they fly. he feels a little bad for yue qingyuan, knowing he's probably caused a big fight, but it doesn't sit right with him. he wishes he knew what happened.
.
liu qingge, meanwhile, is having the time of his life fighting himself. it's good practice!
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casualavocados · 5 months ago
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Learn from who? Learn from you?
Chen Bowen as CHEN YI & Chiang Tien as AI DI KISEKI: DEAR TO ME (2023)
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#ai di x chen yi#chen yi x ai di#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#pdribs#userspicy#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#uh huh. mmhm. parallels and shit#OK LIKE. in nice words ai di essentially tells chen yi to go for it BUT bc hes a Lil Shit he says it like 'use force to PROVE how you feel.#followed by '.....OH WAIT YOU CANT BEAT HIM'. the way he rubs that in chen yi's face too like it isnt even 'youre weaker than him.'#it's you're LOWER than him. & thats why ai di calls him a coward bc therell always be a divide between chen yi & cdy that chen yi wont cros#and the point of this is - okay i know chen yi is literally picking ai di up and throwing him around here but also you have to remember#ai di LETS HIM. ai di doesnt fight back as hard as he could and that puts them on EVEN. EQUAL. GROUND. every time.#& yeah theres some comedy to it but you cant Ever forget that ai di wants chen yi to want him. needs it. he's faking sleep in the 1st scene#and once chen yi realizes what he wants he puts everything he has into keeping it - inadvertently taking ai di's advice by doing so -#& expresses it in every kind of way too. whatever it takes. bc between the two of them its not just 'bring him back' it's 'bring him HOME'#in a way thats based on the constantly being witness to the worst of each other & choosing it AND. years and layers of trust & love.#..ok only I would take a gifset of chen yi picking ai di up & make it abt how their relationship is perfectly balanced. but im right so idc#the last one ties it all together in my onion. chen yi got him home. and ai di's deliberately allowing himself to be loved. they won
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afterthelambs · 5 months ago
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⚠️Spoilers for Look Back but I was initially confused about what Fujino and Kyomoto's relationship had to do with pursuing a career as a mangaka. After thinking about it, I interpret it as a narrative device to represent what will come when choosing to pursue art (of any form, whether it's comics, painting, animation, music, etc.).
Think about it, what's Kyomoto's role in the story? She is what got Fujino to take art seriously in middle school, and what motivated her to continue after she initially gave up. However, she's also the only thing in the story that makes Fujino wish she quit art. First, halfway through 6th grade and then later after her death. She serves as Fujino's motivator and de-motivator.
I think the scene of Fujino wishing that she never told Kyomoto to come out (that pursuing art only led to suffering) represents artists' regrets. We literally look back and see an alternate universe where Fujino never pursued art and it has a happier ending. Anyone that pursues artistic dreams will end up regretting it at some point. It's not easy, any artist will tell you that. The story is saying yes, you probably will end up healthier and more stable by giving up your dreams. Because art is suffering.
But then Fujino enters Kyomoto's room after reading the comic from the alternate reality and all of a sudden we get a montage of the happy memories and accomplishments they had pursuing their dreams together. And we realize that, everything we saw of them in the alternate 'happier' reality pales in comparison to this:
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The happiest both of them look in that alternate world is when they finally meet and promise to work together someday. They loved art. They loved each other. Giving up on your dreams means missing out on all of that, and nothing in the world can replace it. Because yes art is suffering, but art is also joy and love.
And so the end of the story where Fujino goes back to work isn't her moving on. She tapes the comic strip in front of her to remind her of Kyomoto, to remind her of why she got into comics in the first place. Basically, Kyomoto IS art to Fujino. A life with her means experiencing both suffering and joy, while the life without her means having none of that.
I might be wrong about this, like maybe Fujimoto just wanted to tell a mangaka story with doomed yuri (valid) HOWEVER i like my interpretation so im sticking with it.
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lefthandarm-man · 5 months ago
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Bucky Barnes // The Winter Soldier Captain America: The Winter Soldier (2014)
appreciation post for bucky's hair in catws
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opikiquu · 9 months ago
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izsheum · 1 month ago
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lesbian formers…
dratchet and megarod bc why not
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munsonfamilyband · 1 month ago
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Slick Sunday post for @lexirosewrites !! I decided to just post it like this since this is probably going to be long. I do promise it has christmas in it but there’s a build up to that. Also very minor TW for child abuse. It’s less than a sentence but still. And also, this is canon up till s4, I don’t really know how different it is, the important thing is that Chrissy lived and Eddie didn’t get eaten as much as he does in canon.
—————
It starts in 1987. It’s late November, Steve has unofficially taken over his house since he hasn’t spoken to his parents in so long he doesn’t even remember. Eddie and Robin are over helping him decorate their tree. They’re all wearing ugly sweaters and pajamas. Steve and Eddie had just started officially courting, while Robin and Chrissy were still dancing around each other. She was in the middle of lamenting her latest failed attempt to ask her out when the front door opens and the Harringtons enter. A fight breaks out pretty quickly and it culminates in a few smashed ornaments, Steve getting slapped, Eddie being literally sat on by Robin to keep him calm, and Steve being told his things needed to be gone by the next day. He’s told that his behavior is not that of a Harrington.
And then they’re gone.
Eddie forces Robin off of him so he can hold Steve, and she goes to call Hopper. He and Steve had been close before Starcourt and since he came back last year they’re reconnected. (Steve calls him dad behind his back, he’s too scared to say it to Hop’s face yet.)
Hop shows up a few minutes later, only to be followed by one very angry Claudia Henderson. She explains that El had called Dustin on the walkie about the phone call she overheard and Claudia left right away.
They both start helping him pack once they know he’s okay and they all go to Hop’s cabin for dinner. While they’re eating Steve casually mentions that he wants to change his name. What he thought would be a casual comment with little fanfare resulted in Claudia baring her teeth at Hop as they argued over who got to bring Steve into their family officially. It would be scarier if Steve wasn’t ready to cry from how loved it makes him feel. He does eventually have to burst their bubble and tell them he wants to be a Buckley. This does get Hop and Claudia to calm down but it also gets Steve tackled off his chair by Robin in a hug.
Fast forward, it’s now the mid 90s. Chrissy and Robin live in the brownstone next to Eddie and Steve in Chicago. Steve and Eddie got married two years ago and earlier that fall they had learned Steve was pregnant. They had so far only told Robin and Chrissy, but that was because Steve was at home while Eddie was at work and he begged Robin to come with him to buy tests. Both Eddie and Steve knew it was time to tell everyone else, since he had just finished the first trimester and with christmas coming up they decided to go with the most cliche announcement possible.
The four of them go back to Hawkins for the holidays. Robin and Chrissy are staying at the Buckley’s and Eddie and Steve are staying at Hop’s cabin.
The first person they tell is Wayne. They have dinner with him for christmas eve and then over dessert exchange presents. Eddie gets a new set of steel toed boots and Steve gets a new coat. Then they hand Wayne his gift and Eddie grabs their camcorder to record his reaction. Inside is a new baseball hat placed upside down with something balled up inside it. Wayne takes the cloth out and flips the hat around, freezing as he reads it, then quickly dropping it and picking up what is now clearly a onesie. In bold letters the onesie says ‘Grandpa’s Fishin’ Buddy’. The hat says ‘Grandpa is my name, Fishing is my game’. Wayne, still gripping the onesie in his hands looks up at them with wet eyes.
“Is this… I’m gonna be a grandpa?”
Eddie can’t stop smiling behind the camera and he turns it slightly to catch Steve as he smiles at Wayne, giving little jazz hands as he says, “surprise.”
Eddie just barely pans back to Wayne to catch him standing up to pull Steve into a hug.
“I’m so happy for you two. Ed, you better put that thing down and get in here.”
———
The next people they tell are the Henderson’s. While Dustin will also be at Hop’s that night, Steve had wanted to be able to see his mom for christmas so for years they had been doing brunch at the Henderson’s before the three guys go to Hop’s and Claudia goes to get some extra hours working at the hospital.
They show up right on time with their gifts and enjoy breakfast before it’s present time. Dustin gets the new Dungeons and Dragons book that had just come out and a new set of dice that looked like the night sky. Steve gets a new cookbook and a scarf. Eddie gets a scarf as well as a new toolbox for work. Then Steve hands over the gift bag to Claudia, but before she opens it he turns to Dustin while Eddie gets the camcorder again.
“Dustin, I need you to promise me, right now, that what you see right now will not be told to anyone today. Got it?”
Dustin rolls his eyes as he responds, “Dude, it’s just a gift-“
“Dustin. Promise me,” Steve interjects.
After they stare at each other for another 30 seconds Dustin gives a dramatic sigh and promises. With that done Steve gives Claudia the okay to open her gift. She takes out the tissue paper and pulls a folded up sweatshirt and a folded canvas bag out. The bag is unfolded first and Claudia gasps, quickly unfolding the sweater and then dropping them both to rush over to hug Steve.
“Oh, I’m so happy for you! My baby!” Claudia is crying as she and Steve hold each other tight, Steve laughing with pure joy. Eddie catches Dustin standing up out of the corner of his eye and refocuses the camera on him, following him as he goes over and picks up the items his mom dropped. The bag says ‘Grandma’s Magic Bag’ and the sweatshirt says ‘World’s Best Grandma’. Dustin stares at them and then he’s shouting.
“You guys are having a pup?!”
Eddie just grins at him over the camera as he asks, “You ready to be Uncle Dustin?” Eddie then barely keeps the camera from breaking as Dustin rushes him in a hug.
———-
Their final present is that evening at Hop’s. Steve is drinking hot cider and curled into Eddie’s side on the couch, Robin right next to him with a hand on his ankle, Chrissy on her other side laughing as Max shares a story about college. Steve looks around the room and sees Dustin already staring at him, practically vibrating in his seat. It’s clear that he’s doing his best to not spill the beans so Steve huffs a laugh and claps to get everyone’s attention.
“Alright, present time?”
The next minute or so is a rush of movement as everyone finds a spot and grabs their gifts, Steve holding tight to his gift for Hop. Eddie had El help him hide the camera earlier so she can turn it on without giving anything away.
Presents are passed around and opened. Max gave Steve a new poster for his classroom, and Robin got him the fancy desk organizer set he had been looking at for months. Mike got Eddie new patches for his work coveralls and Will gave them a beautiful painted version of their wedding photo. (Steve does tear up over it but tries to cover up as best he can, stupid pup hormones).
Then Steve stands and hands Hop his bag, giving El a wink as he walks past her and he sees her squint her eyes for a breath before giving him a wink back. Steve settles back in to Eddie’s side and gives Hop the go ahead. He pulls out what is clearly a mug wrapped in tissue paper with a hat stuffed into it. Hop takes the hat out first and looks at it, his face unreadable, before he sets it down with the words hidden. He quickly takes off the tissue paper and reads the mug. His face is still blank but everyone can see his eyes filling with tears as he makes eye contact with Steve.
Eddie gives Steve a little nudge and that’s all it takes for him to get up and go hug his dad, being wrapped up in his arms as Hop cries. After a beat where it’s still silent Hop speaks, looking over at Eddie. “Years ago, I thought I would never get to be a grandpa.” Steve just hugs him tighter and the room around them erupts as everyone starts screaming. Eddie gets dog piled by the boys, excluding Dustin who has collapsed on the floor from the relief of not having to hide that anymore. Steve feels two people wrap around him from behind and glancing at their arms he sees that it’s El and Max, both hugging him. When everyone has calmed more Steve goes back to sit with Eddie, who can now place his hand on Steve’s stomach. Hop sits down and finally shows everyone his gifts. The mug has a sheriff’s badge and it says ‘Chief Gramps’ and the hat says ‘Professional Grandpop’. Hop puts it on his head that night and refuses to take it off.
—���—————
Et viola. Also, this is Wayne’s hat because I love it so much:
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fatedroses · 4 months ago
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Two former military elites taking merc jobs perform absolutely hellish battle tactics together.
#ffxiv#digital art#zenos yae galvus#estinien wyrmblood#adventurer zenos#I will always adore this duo conceptually#because like- socially theyre that aragorn-geralt brooding in a corner of a tavern meme#but in combat they are absolutely terrifying#the azure dragoon and the super soldier legatus are here to fuck up a poachers day#aka zenos is about to crossmap someone's airship cause he knows estinien cant make himself jump that far#why have him try to jump when he can just Olympic-level javelin toss this man#also guys#my dudes#all this time I've been working on adven!zenos being a tank#I... have realized I just write him like a warrior who isnt carrying a weapon- sturdy unkillableness and countering and all#I am only a little bit of a dumbass but orogeny just seems to live in my head rent free#it also gave me the terrifying concept of- after spending time with the scions and after the ultimatum-#of him trying to learn more about dynamis- and zenos being zenos starts learning eventually how to harness it#local calm apathetic man can berserk on command because he's a lot angrier/more expressive inwardly than most people expect#depending on how I look into it- it might be how he fuels most of his shinryu transformations but I'll have to work on it more#but ANYWAYS#I love the thought of these two hunting and working together#and estinien being tossed being turned into a tactic#especially with proper form#this is something ive wanted to draw for a very long time and im very happy I actually have the skill to do so now
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just-null · 2 months ago
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Wowie rly digging the yandere clone headcanons… how would each react if their darling tried to run away from them?!
You said tried so I assume this was a failed attempt!
Short answer: they get really upset and try making it your fault (shocker.) Ain't no way any of these mfs think they're the problem. Good news! you're mostly unharmed and alive.
This will just be purely writing bc i mostly had thoughts! sorry no drawing this time!!
[cw! mentions of potential harm to reader (no actual harm done), manipulation, toxic relationship dynamics (yandere flavor), obsessive behavior]
Sekido
You're always being hunted the moment the sun comes down and you don't return home in time. Reasons like that are exactly why he hates it when you part from him. 
This time is different.. he can't find you in your usual spots. There's no fucking way, right?
How could you.. No, how DARE you? Do you think that he's some joke? That his feelings for you are something that you can run away from like it's nothing? 
The second he's sure the sun won't harm him, he's already white knuckling his khakkhara, swinging at anything and everything in his path until he gets to you.
They know how to sense if you're near or not, hell, they probably know how your specific blood type smells like. 
Did you think cuddling up to you and memorizing every detail about you was for nothing? Don't be stupid. All he needs is a trace of you and he's gone in the blink of an eye.
You better enjoy running while you can because when he catches you, and he will, those legs of yours won't have much use after he's done with them. 
Sekido doesn't WANT to do this, but you honestly give him no choice. After he trusted you enough to stop looking over his shoulder, you do this? How can he ever put any faith in you again!?
On the bright(?) side, Sekido's rage wouldn't be solely on you, it'll ricochet onto everyone, especially the other clones and himself. 
They were supposed to be looking after you! But they can't do anything right, even a task as simple as this. 
And why did he think it was a good idea to trust them with something of big importance when all they do is fuck everything up!? Everyone's idiocy is rubbing off on him!
The entire time on his search for you, he's cursing and wanting to crush anything he can get his hands on, especially your bones. 
He doesn't even bother with speaking to the others, too busy spewing out all sorts of hurtful and frustrated comments about everything. 
The brutal thought that you’d rather run away than be with him isn't one he wants to entertain, but it's echoing in his head.
At least, once the other clones get there, Karaku and Aizetsu brawl with Sekido so you're unharmed while Urogi carries you overhead. 
Sekido's jealousy flares up when he sees you in Urogi's arms, making him even more pissed if that's even possible. Great, now he looks like the bad guy and the other three, the saviors. Fucking perfect.
There's a lot of yelling and a lot of blood, especially with Urogi making things so much more annoyingly difficult in the air. Karaku and Aizetsu aren't helping. Why is Sekido suddenly the problem?! You ran away!! 
But when he calms down enough, he's cursing at everyone through clenched teeth. Sometimes trying to convince the others that you don't even need your legs anyway!!
Once you get back home (or temporary prison until you somehow regain favor), Sekido will eye your legs while gripping his staff from time to time. 
Exactly why he's forbidden to be in a room alone with you for a while until he settles down..
He glares at you more often and grows colder than before. Arguments are more common where he twists your words just to have you talk with him and be angry within reason. 
Any other type of conversation makes him so irrationally upset that the others need to step in so that he doesn't lose his temper again.
Karaku
The calmest out of the group. He brushes it off as “you're playing hard to get” again, and if he makes a ruckus, you'll scamper back and beg him to stop like always!
Then it gets darker out.. and when Sekido left, he seemed pretty pissed. Like more than usual..... shit.
Karaku sprints after Sekido when it clicks that he's found you. His mind starts reeling, unsure whether he should laugh at the absurdity of your decisions or get pissed off because you didn't even bother to give a hint! 
Not like that would do anything aside from give you away but regardless!
Everyone needs to relax, this is obviously something they can sweep under the rug. This isn't that big of a deal and you're just having a fit, but things like these can get you hurt, y'know? 
They're fun and all, sure, just maybe give him a heads up next time, yeah? Sekido can't take a joke, you know this!!! Still.. There's a way Karaku can work with this.
He'll be able to swoop in, save you, be your hero, and remind you why staying with him is kinda important. Just in case you forgot~ 
You don't wanna be out and about without his charming grin and protective hold would you? Don't answer that right now, he has a feeling you'll say something wrong!
Yet.. what if you need a firmer hand to remind you of what Karaku provides? What if you got a little too comfortable being protected so you thought you'd be alright leaving them? Man, who knew you could be spoiled!
Because of this, he would purposely fumble, letting Sekido get near you just so he can stop him at the perfect moment. He purposely gets hit too and makes sure some blood gets near you. To remind you how that could've been yours.
When Sekido calms down, Karaku laughs in your face and would pinch your cheeks if you weren't up in the air with Urogi on the way home.
You should've seen your face! It was really cute~! Maybe getting scared is your thing? He'll note that for later.
He offhandedly advises you not to do things like that all the time, fighting Sekido always kinda sucks, but it's not like you actually had a chance of successfully running away so he won't chastise you too much for it. 
That's not his job, and his heart hasn’t pumped that fast in a long time.. not even in a fight! You're so amazing~~
And delusional if you think he's not going to milk this “heroism” thing back there for some extra affection points with you. 
Don't be so mean. he got his head blown off twice and jaw dislocated thrice, not to mention everywhere else on his body. Don't you think those parts of him need some extra loving? more than usual?
There's not that much Karaku can say after that aside from reminiscing like it was a funny story. He's not upset about it, mostly a little miffed you got kinda far without him noticing, but he gets over it. 
The usual routine starts back up for him when you're back home. It's like nothing happened, but he keeps a closer eye on you since everyone's so tense.
Urogi
If you're not home before the sun sets, Urogi's clawing at the walls with stress. He usually accompanies Sekido to go find you, but this time is different. Urogi could just barely tell you were around.. When Sekido bolts, Urogi's flying as fast as he can, trying to find you first. 
You're so far.. you must've gotten kidnapped!!!!!
The stress from before burns into anger, expecting to see someone having their hands on you while you're calling out in vain. How could he let this happen?! Damn sun! 
He darts through the skies even faster imagining it, and when he finally reaches you, you look.. fine? and alone. and looking at him like he's the danger. He's here to save you, dummy..
Urogi falls to his knees, burying his face against your stomach and finally wrapping his arms around you again. Your fists violently hit his head and yank fistfuls of hair back, but it doesn't phase him. 
Your comforting warmth is back, that's all that matters. And god, your smell.. it's almost making him dizzy. He missed you so much.
There's many holes to the story in Urogi's head as to why you're so far from home, but he fills them in with more convoluted delusions. It's just a peaceful reunion right now.. 
That is until Sekido finally arrives and starts swinging his khakkhara way too close to your fragile bones. 
Now he's back in defense mode where he scoops you up and tries flying out of reach. This is so stressful!!! There's lightning everywhere and he keeps having to dodge the multiple staffs thrown his way. 
He shields you with his wings as best he can while trying to stay in the air, so you don't get hurt during Sekido's outburst.
In the skies, it's much clearer to see the hurt behind the haunting glow of Urogi's eyes. Did you care about how he might feel? Did you miss him at all? Did you not feel loved enough? Did someone say something to you? 
As he maneuvers the sky, he holds you as tightly as possible, lightly digging his talons into your skin.
Being without you for a couple hours is agonizing enough on its own. If you HAD left him, abandoned, cold, alone.. he doesn't want to think about it. All that matters is that your kidnappers or liars or whatever influenced you are gone, and you're back safe with them!!! 
You.. you still like him, right? Of course you do, fate wouldn't force your paths together if it wasn't for a reason!
Coming back home is uncomfortably tense, especially with how violently Aizetsu kicked Urogi across the room, nearly through the wall, when he tried to lick your wounds clean. It really hurt! 
When you're patched up, Urogi is ten times as clingy if that's possible. He has his arms looped around you constantly so you can't stray too far, and if his hands are busy, he always has his wings!
As happy as he is that you're back, he can't help but cry into your chest sometimes. Everything is so tense nowadays, he hates it! How could you go and do something like that? Apologize immediately! Or at least hold him too? Doubt creeps in a lot, and your attitude isn't helping.. 
His mood swings are stronger. From sobbing uncontrollably into your clothes to being all smiles and radiating with joy the next just because you said something vaguely decent.
Aizetsu
The demotivation started to creep in the second you left. During the day, Aizetsu sits by the door, wanting to be the first one you properly greet. Sekido and Urogi usually bring you back and he'll be the one in your good graces without lifting a finger. That sounds nice.. 
But as the footsteps fade and the silence lingers, Aizetsu feels miserable the longer he waits... Hold on, silence?
Before he realizes what's happening, he's already dashing to where the familiar commotion is coming from. Dread sets in as his legs take him as fast as they can whilst being the slowest of the four. This doesn't feel like they're rushing over to you after a long day, it feels.. dangerous?
What did you get yourself into..? Why do you insist on going to places Aizetsu can't follow? Are you safe? He hates not knowing.
Usually you're the one who's fine. You deal with four demons almost daily! Please please please be okay. He can't fathom it if you were hurt. 
When he gets there, the puzzle pieces fall into place and Aizetsu gets even more depressed, but at least you're not hurt. Well, not if he interferes. His movements are sluggish, a perpetual frown plastered on his face as he tries holding Sekido down. 
Aizetsu wants to dissolve into the floor, and he does sometimes. Not wanting to fight Sekido off anymore, he slumps over. 
This could've been a regular day where you came home.. Are you serious? Leaving? How pitiful could you be to actually think you could get away? Or was it that you wanted to play some sick joke on them? Well, it's not very funny... It's terrible actually.
Aizetsu stays silent on the way home, walking with a bit more energy knowing you're near despite his heart ache.
You can feel the harrowing disappointment radiating off of him the moment you all go back home.
He's tired, annoyed, and so unbelievably upset. Aizetsu grimaced when Urogi got near your scratches with his tongue, so he “politely�� ushered him away. 
Knowing a human's weak points is good in battle, but he started trying to learn how to heal them, specifically because he knew these types of things might happen.
As he cleans your scratches, he's actively scolding you for leaving in a cold emotionless tone. And by scolding, he's using manipulative language, trying to make you guilty for everything you did. 
He barely has the energy to live, but now that he finally found his light in the darkness, you want to leave? Is it so wrong he wants to hold onto what makes him even a smidgen happier than usual? He reminds you that he'll wither away without you, but he's not really too keen on dying just yet.
When he tries to get back into a routine, he just can't. He knows why you left, but he doesn't want to hear it. Even if you're sweet to him or not, he'll hold you from behind when you rest.
Looking at you is too much, but being away from you is even worse. Aizetsu compromises this way, but gets quieter, occasionally sniffling when he hides his face behind you.
There's too much going on and he's so tired.. If it weren't for the others, he probably would've held you so tight for so long so that you both would perish together.
Maybe that’s why he's only allowed to hold you when you're asleep. Just please don't do that again.. He NEEDS you. Please, please, please.
Safe to say you gave them a scare. When they double down on the protectiveness, living is ten times more difficult for EVERYBODY. when you lose their trust, it's pretty difficult to gain it back, but not impossible!!
Sekido and Urogi will always assume the worst if you're gone for too long while Karaku and Aizetsu give you a little more freedom until the others drag them along into their worries.
#null rot#yandere demon slayer#yandere kny#yandere kimetsu no yaiba#Sekido#Karaku#Urogi#Aizetsu#cloaked cult member#not art#null brainwash#null gospel#IM NOT A WRITER!!!! JUST A REMINDER!!!!!!!!! JST A RAMBLER!!!!!!!!!!!!#i really couldn't think of anything drawing wise to go along with this.... but I really wanted to write for it even if I'm a bit amateur#Am I even doing this bullet thing right?? I'm not good at cohesive thoughts. but I try!! I hope I did this right..??#Also. Sekido honestly doesn't want to hurt you or even put his hands on you. he's just really scared you might something will happen to you#how the fuck is he going to live with himself if you somehow get eaten by another demon? or worse. used as bait from either demon or slayer#now that upper moon fucking four has a soft spot. its really selfish of you to run away..#don't you see how that can ruin everyone's lives including your own!? (manipulative)#why he gets more upset with any other type of convo at the end is bc it reminds him of how things were before. they were good.#but you had to ruin it didn't you? (manipulative ×2) and for sure for sure. if he holds your hand you're getting a bruise.#Karaku is hella chill bc he's wayyy too cocky that he can find you again. the little arrogance he has rearing its head again.#Hes not stupid. he knows you want to escape. but that means he has to whittle you down a little more. get you used to this. to them. to him#You can't escape. he won't let you. He belongs with you. so just try and get comfortable. yeah?#Urogi.. going through it. Hes like your ankle monitor. very fragile minded with his mood swings but extremely stubborn about letting you go#Hit him. pull at his hair. push him away. spit at him. hes sad for a while but bounces back. he always does! and he knows you will too!!#He just needs to wait.. even if it hurts his feelings sometimes. but never for long because you'll be back to loving him like before!#Aizetsu's stuck in a loop of angry -> sad until he ends up quietly crying because hes depressed you dont like them. eveything is pitiful.#he cant even move on bc youre his light. nothing will change that. even if you hurt him. all he can beg of you is to be kind to him. adjust#hes not the monsters you think he is. he can be sweet kind gentle. whatever you want.. just please.
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ilynpilled · 7 months ago
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jaime turning women down constantly more bc he is very monogamous and in love with someone else right now for the first time and is also kinda scared of actually having sex with someone other than cersei is sm better to me than “i respect the kg vows of chastity so intensely rn actually because i changed into a good and serious person” or whatever lol
#i truly dgaf about that bffr jaime dude#like its a stupid vow that says nothing about u as a person lmfao#him in the bath with pia thinking of brienne like u r not fooling anybody honestly#like i truly do think its more copium and not being honest with himself tbfh#like he had a rationalization when pia came into his bed in asos too but then it was purely ‘i only love cers i would never’#and with cat it was so funny when he bluffing and was like uh i cant marry bc of my vows but i could still service u😉😉#he would have pissed himself if he was called on that bluff but only bc he would be cheating on cers and have sex with another woman#man that fucked his twins in a sept next to his sons dead body the moment he returned caring about chastity vows#his development isnt really about keeping every vow ever when most of it is fraudery anyway#like pls he is not keeping his vow to his king rn really 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#i think the vows and respecting them has a deeper meaning thats the whole point which ones do u keep and prioritize and why#like weve been thru this 80x being a real vowhead is not what makes u a good person 😭#deleting ur individuality and personal life to be an honorpillhead lol#the vow to cat has meaning the elite bodyguard vow to never fuck has zero meaning 😭#he was ready to break the no marriage vow w cers pls#im not saying this bc of a shipper endgame in mind i find volcel jaime hilarious its just i dont like it as proof of his development#like ill be real guys sex positive warrior gurm is not pushing the idea that keeping ur chastity vows is what honor is about#like i get that he wants to be better and he is figuring out what that really means but
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tekitothemagpie · 3 months ago
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My sun 😔🤲🏼
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lilithofpenandbook · 5 months ago
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Something about Dumbledore being so hard on Snape
Dumbledore being scornful of Snape even when Snape was on his knees
Dumbledore emphasising that Snape made a mistake and must pay for it
Dumbledore who kept reminding Snape of his mistake even when he was grieving Lily
Dumbledore who didn't just let Snape change sides, he needed Snape to change his heart
Dumbledore who made the same mistakes as Snape and has been living in guilt ever since
Dumbledore who realised Snape was following in his footsteps
Dumbledore who may have started out thinking of Snape as cowardly or selfish but soon grew to trust him
Dumbledore who gave Snape half truths because if worst came to worst then Voldemort would have all the information right on his arm
Dumbledore who trusted Snape enough to not lie to him about the fact that he wasn't telling him everything even though he knew Snape resented it
Dumbledore who trusted Snape so much he knew that even if Snape resented him he would not betray him
Dumbledore who left everything he worked for in Snape's hands knowing it would be safe
Dumbledore who asked Snape to be the one to kill him, not just to save Draco's soul but for his own sake
Dumbledore who chose to die but only at the hands of someone he had grown to love
Dumbledore who once saw Snape as a desperate selfish boy that disgusted him
Dumbledore who made Snape his heir
Dumbledore who made Snape his.
#these two just make me so incredibly feral#while snape was a mirror of tom and harry he was also a mirror of dumbledore#not just a mirror but an echo#a following#he followed dumbledore's footsteps#and dumbledore must have seen this. seen snape and seen himself#dumbledore never quite forgave himself for his mistakes and thats probably why he was so harsh on snape#because he was angry at himself and that anger passed down to the one who followed his footsteps#the one who inherited everything from him#the two are literally father and son like their story is woven like that of a father and son#from snape following dumbledores footsteps in going to the dark and accidentally indirectly killing the one he loved#to his returning home like an estranged son begging his father for help#to their dynamic of a stern father and a son who has too much expected of him yet rises to meet that expectation#severus snape#albus dumbledore#pro snape#pro albus dumbledore#also that line “snape was Dumbledore's”#do you understand how much that makes me feral?#he was Dumbledore's. just that. Dumbledore's.#he wasn't his son as such but more than just his spy teacher even more than his friend#and the way harry was Dumbledore's man so fiercely loyal and trusting and how he saw dumbledore as his protector and father figure#and how Dumbledore loved him despite trying hard not to#that line “snape was Dumbledore's” echos harry and Dumbledore's dynamic#Snape was Dumbledore's. what exactly was he of Dumbledore's doesnt matter because you cant define it#just that he was Dumbledore's
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lesbians4armand · 4 months ago
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once again i really do think armand’s morality and view of his own morality is summed up by “i tried to be good, am i no good?” because he KNOWS he’s not, but he so desperately wants to be good in any way he can be, so that he can be desired. and this in turn means he is deep in denial about any bad he has done other than the deep seated feeling that he is simply “bad” as a vague concept and not the sum of his actions. anyway who’s up thinking normal thoughts about characters.
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kaurwreck · 8 months ago
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y'all have eventually got to realize that kunikida's temper and attentiveness to his schedule aren't callousness, they're coping mechanisms. right. y'all have to eventually figure out that much over seasons + tens of chapters of him being so tender it would snap him in two if not for the order he's constructed around himself. y'all will inevitably pick up on that with how he approaches dazai and kyouka, especially, right? surely.
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novicedraws · 1 year ago
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doodles!
@helsensm I raise your tattoo raiden idea to add with his white hair
also fun times below!
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