#why can’t I just not interact with the fandom?
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jshshj help why is the wall of text so funny— ㅠㅠ professional yapper at work (guess i’m a writer for a reason)
glad the tags made you happy though!! i loooovveee getting lengthy/excited tags or ones that point out little metaphors/foreshadowing/etc i’ve hidden in my stories, so i’m really am just trying to be that person for other people too :3c
still i didn’t think i said anything that was noteworthy enough to get shouted out jshsh
it’s funny that we kind of highlighted leona here bc that is who i’m shipping my yuu with ㅠㅠ (you both don’t know it yet and you will despise me for it but you will like each other). so yeah book 2 would be great for our yuus bc shin gets to play detective and meets a chess partner and cassandra meets her significant annoyance—
as for familial trauma, cass is a demi god from the percy jackson universe (it’s my first fandom and a disney owned franchise, don’t @ me ㅠㅠ), so in terms of ‘not speaking out against your parents or your family’s hierarchy’, she’s been handed a relatively short stick if she doesn’t want to get smitten by divine might or have her life turned into hell—
however, she is very loyal towards her (half) siblings and other half gods and, while spending time in nrc, will start associating adeuce and potential other ramshackle inhabitants with the other campers from back home, so i think her and shin would get along great!! also her experience with the godly world just made her really unfazed by all the magical nonsense in twst ㅠㅠ (of course there’s fairies heating the school and ghost living in the dorm, back in camp harpies cleaned your cabin and nymphs lived in camp. beast people? yeah, she’s seen more than enough satyrs)
okay that’s enough yuu crumbs bc if i don’t stop here i’ll start tossing entire bread loaves—
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🎄
merry christmas!! 🎁
this is the result of an inspiration striking 4 days before Christmas.
i broke my hand and back trying to finish this in time 😭😭 so it’s a bit messier than i prefer and the story flows less smoothly.
but i hope you guys will still enjoy this Christmas present! and the backstory lore bits!
i actually wanted to include all the twst boys but i would actually end up in the graves if i try to do so. thts why i only drew the ones shin would canonically have acquainted and befriended by Christmas (which is roughly before scarabia arc and right after octavinelle arc. unfortunately the bad experiences r still too fresh and there wasn’t enough time for shin to get to know the octatrio 😔)
also rook is there as a fellow science club member!
im done rambling im gonna go hibernate now.
hope anyone who sees this have a wonderful christmas and the rest of december <3
#❃ ˗ˏˋ➛ transcendence#❃ ˗ˏˋ➛ sitting by the water with yudi#i’ve sent 33 minutes voice messages before why am i surprised#like that’s a podcast#i either have no words or all of them at once lol#i’m very slow when it comes to tagging or responding so a lot of stuff is still stuck in draft purgatory#but it’s a very ‘be the force you want to see in the world’ kinda thing for me#interaction makes the fandom go round or sth like that#also i’ve just really fallen down the oc rabbit hole esp for twst#i have my own collection (that i just haven’t introduced yet) but i also love seeing moots’/other people’s#i just want all of them to hang out and cause chaos (esp all the yuus they deserve it)#it’s like being a child and sitting on the carpet playing dolls with your friends hshshh#also what a smooth transition to talking about cass; masterful gambit hsjsj#i’ve been organising some of my ocs’ documents recently bc there’s three/four i want to introduce#cass being the first of them#but i’m always pushing it back bc i feel like i need to draw them first#and let’s just say i’ve been neglecting the art branch of my skill tree ㅠㅠ#also all of cass’s grudges against the gods are channelled directly into crowley who can’t smite her for speaking out of term#which is very refreshing for her#omg i also just noticed that shin and cass have similar eye colours as well jshsh
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I was going to wait til Monday to post a bit of this, you know for mental health Monday but I decided to roll with it now.
I don’t post a lot of real life things here because this tends to be my little fandom safe space where I love posting my fandom messiness and thirsting over clones and posting my fanfic. But I have noticed a lot of peeps that I interact with are going through a rough patch. Post Holiday blues, January blues…something. It’s rough out there, especially in the real world.
Went through a bit of a slump myself. Prior to the holidays, I did up my writing plan for all my WIPs. It was very…ambitious for lack of a better word. Like damn, I know I can write a lot in a session but we’re talking like a fic a day and that…just hasn’t happened. So, when I missed a couple days of writing, I was hard on myself. I hold myself to impossible standards sometimes and forget to give myself space.
I was pretty hungover on January 1st, the wine got to me a bit more than usual and I just wasn’t feeling writing at all, though I did push myself to write a few words. I was able to post my New Years story a couple days later but I remember posting and thinking this is shit. This isn’t your usual, though it’s not terrible in retrospect. I just…it got to me. So instead of following my crazy plan I focused on some drabbles and doing Whumpuary, which is thankfully every other day, so it gives me a bit of space. I have been working on my next installment of my fix-it, which the first scene is light hearted and it’s been fun but slow going.
Had a bit of an epiphany a couple days ago, because of a comment someone said. And it sent me into a bit of a tail spin. An angry tailspin that my hubby had to catch the brunt of. He is fabulous though and just rolls with it, lets me rant and knows that I’ll feel better for it. Someone in our extended friends group cracked a joke about me not working yet and how I’m just enjoying sitting around at home. It was meant to be light hearted but it hit wrong on so many levels.
I lost my job last year due to a company restructuring. It was sudden and I was really angry at the circumstances of it. And more importantly, because it was the second job I had lost in two years to no fault of my own. But I still gave myself the fault in all of it. There was a time where I really struggled to hold down a job for a variety of reasons after I got out of the military, and every time something like this happens, it digs up a bunch of stuff from then…
But the fact of the matter is, since losing my job a lot has happened healthwise and I am actually on disability. As of right now, I can’t work. It’s something that has been a long time coming and the timing just happened to work out. At the same time, people who know react one of two ways, oh but you’re fine, you don’t look sick, why can’t you work, or they start on some BS about must be nice, etc. I won’t even start on the whole who is deserving and mooching off the government stuff, because I will just make myself upset.
It isn’t nice. For someone who has worked all their life, I would much rather go to work every day than sit at home. Weird but true. And I feel doubt and second guess this and wonder if I can go to work and all this is just me being weak, etc.
Comments like that from people don’t help at all. And then it happened, the moment of clarity…because usually I’m fine on most days. And then I was working on a scene, got up to make myself some coffee and I had a moment. There was a sound in my apartment, no clue what it was, but it set something off in my head and for a good moment, I had this really disorienting moment of not really knowing where I was, like half in a memory and half in the present and trying to sort it. It’s happened before. I have PTSD, an autoimmune condition, and a whole list of things, so the amount of times something has gone wrong suddenly is long. But I’m standing there at my kettle like nearly going into a panic attack and managed to calm myself down and sort what happened. Had this happened at work, I would have had to go sit somewhere for a bit, wasting work time to pull myself out of it and then pretend to be productive for the rest of the day. Because, in the immediate aftermath of this, after I calmed down, I was dizzy and exhausted and just done. No energy left.
And the fact that I was home allowed me to go take a nap for a couple hours and reset so to speak, which is probably the best and most effective way I have found in dealing with a PTSD attack. It works for me personally better than any med they have given me. Can’t do that working. Not to mention, if someone is next to you when stuff like this happens, most people are not willing to understand. You are immediately judged and ostracized (in my experience) because you do not fit into society’s mold.
But after all this, it made me realize that I need to give myself a bit of grace. To allow myself moments to feel bad. To focus on myself and be accepting. I think it is a big part of self-care we all forget. Like even people that don’t have medical conditions or diagnoses need to remember. We all cannot be perfect and productive always. Sometimes we need a break. We need to allow ourselves that.
Especially during this time of year, when stress is high and people are frustrated. We just all need to give ourselves a pat on the back, take things a day at a time and practice a little acceptance. Like if we finish that chapter or art or whatever in a day, that is fantastic. On other days we might not do much of anything, and that is ok too.
This is in no way a message saying I am taking a break btw, so no worries! To those who follow my writing, I am here and writing, just on my own time. So at times, I'll probably post a bunch at once and other times, it'll be a bit slow going. Also, keep asks and interactions coming, absolutely keeps me sane and happy to keep interacting!
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Why do I do this to myself? I say I care about my mental health but then I go on tumblr and learn the most tragic shit about mclennon and the beatles in general and then cry. Why do I do this? Why do I torture myself?
#the beatles#john lennon#paul mccartney#george harrison#ringo starr#mclennon#pls help#Like i am in SO much pain#but also their music makes me feel away I’ve never felt before#why can’t I just not interact with the fandom?#why cant i be normal
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I still browse the submas tag so regularly but after all these inactive periods I used to take, I’d fallen into this sort of self-conscious slump of being too shy to interact with posts and the fandom for a long time and I know it’s been like that for months. Trying to do better about that now instead of being so nervous about it ^^
#I’ve been running around following a lot of people now after a period of inactivity so if anyone’s wondering why this is why#nothing to be nervous about cause there are so many kind people here#just a general anxiety thing that happens and I know it’s kept me from feeling like I can interact for a while I WANNA GET OVER THAT#it’s been a bit of an exhaustion thing too from irl stuff not letting up but I love this fandom and want to be more active in showing that#I know I’ve just kind of contained myself to this blog again out of just anxiety but that’s not fun#I’ve tried a lot of times but keep wimping out and going ‘no I can start again another day’ but I can’t keep saying that every time#TODAY IS THE DAY#I love this fandom and want to be better about showing it
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why do you hate Joshua Graham or Honest Hearts so much?
This DLC and character represents a bigger issue with fandom spaces I have but particularly fallout fandom in general.
Fallout tends to tackle a lot of topics controversial and not. The first two games it’s heavy cause they are the most satirical and direct with how anti-war, nationalism and etc… they are. 3 loses this as it’s very clear once you play or learn about all the games that Todd and a bunch of guys at Bethesda just liked the 50s post apocalyptic aesthetic and refuse to actually critique the ideals of the time period like the earlier titles.
New Vegas is the game that really gets back into it a degree it almost seems like it’s taking too much on. There are things done exceedingly well while other things are done horribly wrong . I’ve made posts about it before and plan to make a big series of posts (it’s a lot of writing) but my biggest gripe is with Honest Hearts and all the gross and white savior esque depictions it has of indigenous peoples. The entirety if FNV does not do the injustices faced by indigenous people correctly on any count. My two biggest complaints are with the Khans and the tribes in Zion but I’ll talk about the former on a different post.
Both characters of Daniel and Joshua are the most accurate depiction of white saviors I’ve seen and I hate how the DLC tries to justify and defend them. The DLC treats Joshua like this man who has repented for his past actions when he is just retracing his steps after his cruelty bit him in the ass. He was one of the worst parts of the Legion and it is all but explicitly stated that if you don’t force him to be non-violent he will turn the tribes of Zion into the legion 2.0. The Dead Horses and the Sorrows are horribly infantilized by both Daniel and Joshua who both use them for self serving purposes guised by religious duty. The White Legs are the horrible stereotype of violent and savage indigenous and I personally think a lot of their interlinking with Ulysses, his hair and Ulysses character in general are distasteful and very telling of how BIPOC or POC where involved.
But outside of the game it’s the weird obsession people have with these characters ideologies and trying to make them seem more interesting/philosophical than they are. Tumblr is an echo chamber and many fans of Fallout are not the people on this site. Many people are not educated in the issues these characters convey and how poorly they do or used these characters as a poor introduction for their takes. Contrary to what a lot of people believe in, fallout has a prediomeny white cis male fanbase. More importantly a large portion of the fanbase is white.
You can joke how FNV made you trans or see the numbers on post/fics or diverse headcanons but these are kiddy numbers compared to the millions that consume the franchise and aren’t in those more aware spaces or don’t engage in the spaces the same way someone like me does/has to. Their views shape a lot more than people realize and it’s exhausting to be in a space where people don’t correct the more subtle yet toxic aspects of it but also adopt them into some weird quirky view point on the characters or issues. Some people don’t realize and some people don’t care.
My main issue is just the idolizing of these sort of thing in this fandom space and people try to acts like a game like fallout whose tagline is “War never changes” and has never had a game not revolve around political or militaristic factions issues isn’t that deep or doesn’t relate to real issues. I think it’s mainly caused by how over powered you can become and how you can strong arm your way past these learning moments as majority of people who play this game do play it as a power fantasy where they can do so as they please (which of course, go ahead it’s fun) but never take in parallels or lessons in the story as if it was just another first person shooter.
Also like another personal gripe is Cazadores spawn like hell whenever I’m there and I have not found a mod that works to mod them out so I have to play Indigenous Racism the DLC while getting jumped by giant wasps WHILE helping Mormons. Like I cannot catch a break.
#I’m mostly silly or character headcanon focused on this blog#but sometimes I forget some people literally have never interacted with someone slightly outside of their ideologies or don’t learn about#philosophies that don’t pertain to their view point and actively block them out#and so I have like a meltdown and occasionally post about it cause like I see more people hate Danse for regurgitating BoS teachings than#hate Joshua Graham who helped found the legion participated in their practices and still has this weird bloodlust#like make it make sense why do you like this white man genuinly like outside of his aesthetic#I can say silly shit about them hit it’s always I think it’s surreal they even exist while others genuinely wish they did so they could fix#them and some of all don’t realize how quickly jokes lead people down rabbit holes and pipe lines cause ur not gonna see posts even pitying#that man in here#like when I defend Danse it is through the signs and events in game that show he is not stuck in his ways and possibly only adopted those#beliefs because of his tramatic events with super mutants and the bos being very anti anything not human#their are affinity reaction that concern this while Joshua like moans yes when killing the white legs and is always polishing his gun goon#pile like I’ve learned too much about him the Mormon faith and that dlc to be told I’m playing favorites he is not fixable or repentent#this fandom has one of the worst issues of he’s my fave so he can’t do wrong when some of this characters are literal unapologetic rapist#racists or individuals who condone or perpetuate like ideas and concepts like obviously I’m gonna not like them????!#like I still think it’s interest to dissect them and I try so hard to not be a hypocrite but sometimes it’s like the whole this is just a#fun thing for you but like be aware of what you are taking in and reflect like is so important fiction can slowly seep into your morals#I’m rambling and losing track of shit so imma stop here before I reach the tag limit but again dm and ask cause this is the stuff I will#blab about#horrible at normal conversation tho#fallout#fallout new vegas#joshua graham#honest hearts#ask#anon#fallout 3
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Tw Rant
I hate how the TRAs have to take over everything and make it about their stupid message. I’ve been a huge Greek Mythology fan all my life and Telemachus has been my favourite character ever for years and years (and years).
Personally I love Epic the musical, I think it’s a funny adaptation of my favourite book but in Different Beast (my fave song from Epic but it’s being ruined) Odysseus sings ‘I don’t have a daughter’. This is perfectly fine in context but the Tras have started using it to joke about trans!Telemachus.
At first I ignored this but they’re still talking about it, drawing art about it and now they’ve started saying ‘this is the modernised Odyssey’. I even saw people saying it’s transphobic not to headcannon Telemachus this way. It’s so annoying seeing them take a character like Telemachus who I’ve cared about before some of these people learn the alphabet and turn him into some annoying as trans ally.
I have plushys named after this guy (parents didn’t let me name our dog after him), see him as the ideal (and only good tbh) man and he’s just generally my comfort character. I don’t want to associate him with the removal of woman’s rights and the disfigurement (idk if that’s the right word so sorry if it’s mean) of children. It sucks that they have to go and trash everything without knowing anything about the source material.
#Telemachusssss he fights for me he fights for me (not for men’s rights)#<- inside joke adapted to this situation#radblr#I’d probably be able to deal with it if it was just under the epic tag bc Ik most the fandom jokes annoy me so I rarely look at that tag#but epic fans ALWAYS tag the odyssey Greek mythology and all the characters which are tags I do follow (I’ve had to unfollow a few character#tags because of just how much spam they put there) so I get it on my da#dash involuntaryily which pisses me off you don’t tag pjo stuff Greek mythology (they do use god character tags tho so not perfect)#why can’t epic fans stay in their space epic =/= the odyssey#and because of the tagging problem if I like anything Greek myth related my for you and other tabs are instantly flooded with epic#like just leave me aloneeeeee#use your tags and I’ll use mineeeee#radical feminism#radical feminist safe#terfblr#terfsafe#radical feminists do interact#radical feminst#sunni posts
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I really need to get serious about personal projects again
#I think I said something like this last year too lol#currently in a weird headspace about it#the biggest reason why I lost focus on them was bc I prioritized engaging in fandom#(something that I never really did when I was focused on publishing a few years back)#so part of me feels like in order to make considerable progress on projects again I need to cut myself off from fandom#and I kinda have been weening myself off a bit from animanga but not really for that reason#it was mostly bc I was getting overwhelmed by how much I was consuming and I wanted to appreciate things fully#I don’t think I’d cut myself off from fandom completely either I’d still try to keep up with stuff#but the idea of not engaging in fandom anymore kinda.. scares me?#idk I feel like a major loser admitting this lol#it just feels like I’d lose a lot of connections with people#and would lose a lot of the love I have for stories if I’m not actively interacting with them :(#and then there’s also that stupid feeling of being a ‘fake fan’ because I’m not dedicating every single second of free time to fandom#which is dumb bc like I have a life and need to make money yknow I got things to do#im just Stressed bc I’m at such a critical stage career wise and im getting closer to 26 so hhhhh healthcare coverage will be up in the air#so I really can’t afford to dawdle#there’s just so much I wanna do and while I’m not necessarily racing to get it done I still want to take advantage of the time I have#but it also sucks feeling like I’m giving up a part of myself to progress on another part of myself#I don’t think any of this makes sense sorry I just needed to dump my thoughts bc I am Terrified™️#anyway personal projects! gotta get back to those !#blahblahbills#delete later
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i think it’s so funny when people decide that they see two characters who are friends as “siblings” and then they think it’s illegal to ship them. like at all. ever. if you do you’re problematic and don’t respect platonic relationships and also you suck and should go to jail. the end 💖
#i don’t even ship anything so i do not have a metaphorical horse in this race#but recently i’ve noticed that only ships that are deemed ‘canon’ are considered valid#like if you can’t pull out fifty scenes from the source material explaining why your ship is romantically coded you deserve to die idfk#SHUT UPPP it’s making so many fandom spaces almost intolerable#i don’t careeee if characters have interacted or if they make sense#do they look hot together?? or do their personalities collide in a way i find interesting? or or or WHATEVER#‘omg but she canonically hates him’ ‘omg no their relationship is only platonic’ these people are not real#several more qualified people have spoken about this i’m not claiming to understand or be like a wise benevolent fandom god or wtvr#this is just smth i’ve noticed (more in certain fandoms than others tbh) and felt annoyed about#m’s thoughts
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Amnesty please I have a sad backstory
#that’s a joke and also a ‘I think it’s lame to think you’re cancelled before you’ve even done anything but also I get why it may be seen#not how you would hope#anyways#daisy is the town bike in my shipping wall#look upon second relisten… daisy voice performer did amazing at conveying a post from hell returning intimacy that I can’t shake thinking#about#so it elevated my vague memory of simply liking the development of their relationship upon first listen. it became more tender next time#also idk if I’d say it’s fully romantic but it’s def something#also Jude but only as like. an au sort of thing. like one where the stakes are lower…#same with Julia. that one is more in a ‘killing as a theatrical meaning for love/sex/etc#so like when I’m playing dolls in my head they’re rivals in some fashion#like think that married professors who write papers as if though they despise each other#plus basira kind of. I’m being a hipster about it tbh#anyways I’m sorry if this is kinda weird I do think this is just a byproduct of homestuck being my first majorly interactive fandom#she’s my vriska
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the levels of delusional you must be to think you’re fandom police. “i don’t like what i think this person might be shipping therefore they’re evil!”
read that again.
like. what the fuck.
#if you want to make fandom space unnecessarily miserable for yourself by thought policing go off#but leave other people out of it#y’all can’t get the concept of live and let live through y’all’s thick fucking skulls#i am so tired.#pro-shipping or as i call it the adult and mature way to exist in adult fandom spaces#i’ve had it with fandom atm this is why i’m just shouting thoughts into the void not even interacting with people anymore
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is it some weird asian politeness instilled in me that i don’t like calling characters by their first name? like for western characters its fine but like when calling someone by their first name or a nickname is important, i cant bring myself to do it.
like girl you aren’t even real why am i so caught up on the fact that i dont know you personally so i shouldn’t be calling you a name you haven’t allowed me to call you.
#it’s so bad when I’m interacting with other fans#bc they’ll be like ‘omg izuku’ and I will add on being like ‘yes MIDORIYA is so cool’#like it feels so jarring for the conversation sometimes#like girl they aren’t even real and everyone calls them by their first name or nickname but I just can’t#like idk why I’m like ‘we are not friends so I am not allowed’ bc it’s been hammered into my head since birth BUT GIRL THEY ARENT REAL#i also had this issue when I was in any kpop fandoms#like I would only call them by their stage names bc anything else would be personal and wrong of me ya know?#aaaaa I’m a lil crazy don’t look at me#the rare og text post
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#ashamed anon#not publishing your ask cuz I don’t know if it’s genuine or not#if it is the good for you#some of us have been saying for a while#and if watching the documentary had this effect on you then all I can say is finally#I can’t watch the documentary till it’s put up on some streaming platform so I won’t be able to tell why you came to this conclusion for#quite some time even though I have an idea why#id you actually feel like talking it through please free to dm me about it#you wouldn’t be the first one to do it and I would never reveal your identity#as for telling your moots you don’t owe them anything#simply start catering your content/tweets to your interests ONLY and they’ll begin to understand on their own#especially if you don’t want to be confrontational#because your side of the fandom are bullies when it comes to online interactions and difference of opinion#hope there’s many many many more like you in the coming weeks and months#also I really mean it feel free to dm me and talk about it - I won’t judge or reveal your identity#you’ll find that louies are not what we’ve been made out to be#here’s to hoping you stay strong to your new found convictions#appreciate your message <3#(sorry for all the typos that’s just how I am)
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#negative self talk /#why do I feel so much guilt over how I feel abt & interact with media#and also why does guilt make me feel like I’m gonna explode#guilt and fear!!! fear!!!! god I am so ???#and anger obviously but that feels like somewhat normal? not to the extent that i have it but#like is it the not having much else in my life that makes me so attached to whatever abt media#bc idk im just so stupidly intense about it to the point where I can’t talk abt it all#bc if I try to talk I will just scream and cry#like I always thought fandom was like oh! people who get really into things like me!#but I am way way way too much#even for that#and I don’t wanna ruin my favorite things for myself by taking them too personally anymore#and it’s obviously 100% my fault but idk what to do abt it#:////////// anyway#jus talkin#I wanna be like everyone doesn’t hate me and think I’m horrible it’s just me but#what if everyone actually does hate me and think I’m horrible lol then I’d look like I’m not self aware#anyway GOD me you fucking dumb fucking piece of shit if you’re gonna be this whiny then like fucking create something about it for gods sake#you have enough fucking dumb stupid terrible drafts just make another dumb stupid terrible little stupid whatever#or else stop fucking complaining abt it!#—if you like this I will assume it’s a nice ‘I see you’ gesture don’t worry#like obvs no one has to but I know I’m sometimes not sure#kinda hope for y’all’s sake no one reads this but if you do and you leave a like#I will take it as a kind acknowledgment and I will appreciate it and not assume you’re necessarily agreeing to any of this haha#*agreeing with
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this post is for chickadees and chickadees ONLY! if you’re not a chickadee keep scrolling!!!
#we have an alt account right???#it was made to prove there was no ‘proship style’ and then we got a new alter around 2022#who loved our fandom so intensely but couldn’t understand why we were blocked by everyone in said fandom#so we made a tumblr for her where she could be neutral and occasionally share ideas for fics#(for the ‘no proship style’ account)#AND THEN SHE MADE FRIENDS#ON ACCIDENT#and now we’re like ‘fuck we can’t reveal this is an alt’#so we avoid people who say ‘no proshippers’ but otherwise just interact as normal right?#BUT NOW IT’S BEEN LIKE TWO YEARS#AND WE’RE MOVING FANDOMS AND SHIFTING SHIT AROUND AND LIKE#we don’t want to say goodbye or ghost her friends???#even if she integrated with the current host and whatnot#BUT WE CAN’T SAY ANYTHING#WE’RE IN TOO DEEP#so like. hi chickadee#yes connie integrated with our host yes that account is ours#no we weren’t trying to evade anything#we were just wanting to share our ideas with neutrality#if you read this far i applaud you#and if you wanna block us that’s fine but like#just wanted to say sorry it got this out of control#and you really are one of my best friends
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maybe i’ve spent too much time offline lately but mxcxr fans straight up making fun of bob’s death are hella weird. y’all are on your phones way too much if you think the way you’re behaving is normal.
personally i have mixed feelings. he was a part of something formative for me but i was so disappointed by many things he said and did and i’m glad he was out of the band. yet i still felt shock and sadness when i saw the news. my opinion of him is still the same, and i checked his twitter after to see his last tweets and it disappointed me all over again. but it’s not like that made me glad he died.
i don’t know what the members are thinking, but maybe there was someone who cared about him, or someone close to him that had similar nuanced feelings about his character. i don’t want to think about the members or anybody else having to read the weird shit y’all are saying about him dying just cause y’all don’t think before you post.
#honestly..get mad if you want. i’m just posting to get it off my chest. i don’t interact w the fandom on here for a reason lol#it should go without saying that i don’t think anyone should gloss over the bad stuff either#but if you can’t wrap your head around why some people might have sympathy for him#maybe consider whether you’re putting yourself on a moral pedestal#no i do not put myself on a moral pedestal for reacting with shock to someone’s death#that is a very normal reaction to have#txt
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I dislike romantic SSKK as much as I dislike romantic SKK (but I have a more positive opinion on platonic SSKK) and I dislike the shippers the same amount. I just don’t talk crap about it like I do Dazai x Chuuya because there’s fewer fellow haters. In fact, a lot of the haters of dachuu and their shippers are the most rabid Atsushi x Akutagawa shippers. So I’m too scared to piss them off 😭
#once again I generally don’t like a lot of the ships here or the shippers and it’s so annoying trying to find non ship content for many#characters and most shippers act like their ship is canon and you’re delusional for not seeing it’s canon… being in this fandom is hell.#that’s why there’s a couple analysts I follow on IG a couple fanartists & a couple memers. who don’t ship things or are more chillabout it.#but it’s still so hard to avoid. so I mainly stick to the x reader & oc side of the fandom. which sucks because I WANT CHARACTER ANALYSIS I#WANT TO TALK TO PEOPLE ABOUT THE PLOT. I WANT THEORIES AND HEADCANONS AND FRIENDLY CANON INTERACTIONS AND JOKES ABOUT RIVALRIES. but no. we#can’t have that. we get so much ship stuff thrown in that I don’t want to follow anyone because it’s just gonna circle back to ships#and it’s more fun to love things than hate things as I said before so I just stick to what I like with occasional complaints#//#my complaints#anti sskk#✦.˳·˖✶ ‧₊˚✧𝖘𝖈𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖒𝖘 𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖔 𝖙𝖍𝖊 𝖘𝖙𝖆𝖗𝖗𝖞 𝖛𝖔𝖎𝖉✧˚₊‧✶ ˖˳.✦
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