#why am i depressed again? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

su1c1d3wh0r3z · 7 months ago

Text

zero sugar dr pepper and lightly salted rice cakes as my first meal of the day after sleeping until 4:00 p.m.

4 notes · View notes

deathricedrawn · 4 months ago

Text

i'm ready to try

#This drawing is kind of personal to me #I recently graduated (CUM LAUDE WOOOO!!!!) and its like. not to get depressing #but when i was younger i was never sure whether i would make it to this point #When i was going through what i consider to still be like. the worst time of my entire life #This fictional character was there for me and she was something for me to latch onto and cope with #eGem helped me a lot with being able to process my emotions at the time but also helped me to reflect on myself #which i think is a big reason as to why I'm really happy with where i am with myself right now #I'm going off to uni next school year to study astronomy!!! which!!!#Im also doing because of eGem!!! She ignited this kind of childlike wonder for space for me #I love doing math and physics and whilst Im still a bit scared because. honestly i don't know whether this is what i want to do with my lif #I think i'll be okay either way #either way i wanted to draw egem again even if i haven't done so in a while because its like #i think i wouldnt be who i am without her. i think i'd be a lot worse off #so like. thank you empires smp thank you geminitay thank you egem This drawing is me expressing my gratitude #AND THANK YOU AUTISM!#empires smp #empires smp s1 #empiresblr #esmp #geminitay #art #fanart #alice.art #mcyt #mcytblr #song is andromeda by weyes blood... obv.. you guys know me by now :oP

2K notes · View notes

darlinggash · 3 months ago

Text

watched Deadpool and Wolverine for the THIRD time yesterday and i still feel like that wasn’t enough…

PUT IT ON DISNEY+ ALREADY PLEASE

#hugh jackman #wolverine #deadpool and wolverine #logan howlett #deadpool #what is my problem #why am i like this #post movie depression #i need to watch it again #i love this movie

311 notes · View notes

fucklife101 · 2 years ago

Text

No one understands how much I hate myself. I hate myself so fucking much I can’t even look on the mirror without feeling absolutely disgusted. I want to die.

4K notes · View notes

pleasedontcareaboutme · 2 months ago

Text

It's missing my father hours rn so imma just dump a bunch of pictures here and cry

( sorry i don't know the source of anything I just had them on my phone)

(also dont read the tags i just need to let it out lol)

#I just realized I can call him dad easier than my real dad and now I understand why am I so damn attached to him #I always knew he was a parental figure for me #but now I connected the dots #How when u have an absent dad and a d34d mom a guy shows up in ur life #that tells u life advice that both of ur parents failed to do so #and makes u feel safe the first time in ur life #ofc ud become attached #i know for sure its unhealthy how much i love and miss him #he occupies most of my thoughts honestly #But how could i not cling to him so much when he was the only one who gave me hope in life #i try to keep going and even tho he is not here i keep telling myself whatever he taught me. i keep reminding myself he wants us to live an #bloom and be free #and that's what ill try to do #but you know somedays i wish i could just disappear and be wrapped in eternal happiness #its so fucking hard to pull yourself out of the slump man im so fucking tired im so so tired #somedays i wish id have the courage to off myself but i know that deep down i want to live and ive always wanted to live but i have no idea #how to live. i feel like i finally found a purpose and someone i love. but at the same time im always doubting myself and im scared of losi #g this little hope again and i know i should cherish and use it instead but each day i have this anxiety because rn i have nothing else if #lose this i seriously will lose everything atp. but ill still try bc rn its this or death so i should try im just damn tired yes anyways #sorry for being depressing some days just dont work out but thats okay #yes at the same time i want to get out of my head and try to find some friends but i cant deny that im highkey fucked up and i just cant le #go of my past and i still feel like that helpless unloved kid and idk how to form relationships this way. i dont trust myself at all so idk #how to trust others. and i feel like in order to find ppl that would love me i have to overshare abt my whole lifestory bc it still dictate #my life heavily. and since i met this band its better cuz im learning to deal w it and i want to heal from everything but yes at the same t #me who would wqnt to be friends w. someone that has like a year of life experience and 18 years of depression lol #so yes its complicated. bc i have friends but im like the funny friend. the one that is as shallow as puddle and has no problems but honest #y im genuinely sufferint qnd have been sufferinz all my life so i want to come out of my funny friend role. but that wojld mean i have to t #ll the shit i went through to all my friends but tbh it would be so random so ye. i do have a plan though. how it could work. But yes im ti #ed have been tired for 7 years now. But this time around i hope i can successfully get out of this torture cycle lol.#ok sorry this is what happens after puberty guys i could beva research case for a damn mental institute atp xdd

25 notes · View notes

girlyteengirl16 · 10 months ago

Text

life is starting to feel like praying to god to kill me again

#i want to die #it’s getting bad again #i want to relapse #i want to bleed out #i’m not okay #i want to die so bad #pls kill me #trauma #i wanna kms #im still traumatized #tw depressing stuff #mentally unstable #god why am i being punished #god please let me feel okay for once #mental abuse #tw depressing thoughts #mentally tired

111 notes · View notes

thebirdandhersong · 2 months ago

Text

Lol

#theres nothing quite like your mother saying Well maybe you shouldve been more careful because now your boss might think youve been flirting #with this male coworker (whom i like splendidly as a friend) and now maybe she thinks youre not trustworthy #and maybe she regrets hiring you because you said you feel like youre making a lot of mistakes this week and she might assume thats because #your head is filled with this boy.#so dont make her regret hiring you.#MA'AM I TOLD YOU I WAS ALREADY ANXIOUS BECAUSE I MADE SO MANY MISTAKES TODAY WHY ARE YOU MAKING ME ASHAMED #OF SOMETHING THAT I HONESTLY HAD NO CLUE I OUGHT TO BE ANXIOUS ABOUT AT MY FIRST NEW JOB AFTER IVE GRADUATED????#anyway going to bed i cant take this anymore LOL she said it so lightly and im like. well i never even considered #being afraid of making my boss regret hiring me somehow because of some kind of behaviour that i had no idea was sending some kind of signal #anywaysssss 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭#and then she was like why are you crying?? 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀#not to be like this is partly why i didnt want to move home but confound it all why are things like this #can i not simply confide in my mother my anxieties and worriws #worries #and not also have to worry about her potentially being like Well have you considered you ARE right and it IS your fault?#idk man something something firstborn child eldest daughter can i have some room to breathe. please #also not to whine but Not my father walking in on me eating dinner at 10pm because i was holed up #in my room in a semi depressive state after so many gong shows in a work day and straight up having no appetite #but deciding my body needs the food anyway its better late than never.....walking in and then saying #you know if you eat this late you'll gain weight. SIR??????????????????#sorry to complain and rant again i simply cannot in this house and whats more am doing my best to honour my parents #but why is it so hard out here and how can they say stuff like that with a smile!!!!!!!#also i DO have an inner critic who is always like Its your fault you are the worst you should be ashamed always........why do my parents #not understand after knowing me for so long and watching me grow up #that i can make myself so ashamed of the smallest thing so easily and that what they say drives me to shame almost as easily?#ANYWAY LOL WHAT A DAY #you guys!!! i am working so hard i promise i PROMISE I am!!! it is my first full time job ever and i am working so so hard #i am doing my absolute best and no one sees it and that is FINE i just wish my parents would see that i AM trying!!#i come back home so dead every single day because i put in 120%! this is literally my first job after graduation #and my parents KNOW this has been the most exhausting taxing and soul crushing year ive had in my very short life so far

21 notes · View notes

ifindus · 9 months ago

Note

we know about söta bror, but what about söta söster👀👀👀👀

söta söster??? 😮

#hetalia #aph norway #aph sweden #hws nyo norway #hws nyo sweden #aph nyo norway #aph nyo sweden #hws norway #hws sweden #thanks for the suggestion!! 🥰#I am so bad at drawing nyo Norway she just looks the same as regular norway but with longer hair :((((#at least nyo sweden looks like her own person :(((#I might have forgotten how to draw - need more practice to get into it again #am I depression?? is that why I have had no motivation to draw lately??#who knows

60 notes · View notes

nuppu-nuppu · 1 year ago

Text

Ignore if you don’t want to read about me being stupid once again

#pls dont read if you cant handle venting and whining #once again i am here to say that i am the loneliest person alive and i feel like i can’t grasp the basic consept of friendship and do it lol #like idk how to be friends #i feel like i will forever be sad and lonely #and i know everyone will say you can talk to me and i know that but i’ve just been by myself for so long that i don’t remember how to have #actual conversations with people i feel like i am disconnected from reality #i feel like i am an extremely unlikeable person and that’s why i was all alone in highschool and idk i am oversharing on the internet again #because it’s the only place i kind of feel safe doing it #pls take care of yourselves first before comfoting me or anything im sorry i sound very pathetic #how do i start living again #how does one live anyway #im just in my head all the time #this was supposed to be hot girl summer but it’s once again summertime sadness #im so stupid!!!#im so anxious and depressed that i dont know what to do with myself #im so sorry for oversharing i have a therapist dont worry im kind of taking care of myself #but the eternal loneliness just wont let me go #idk how to be a person anymore #i’m just sad #thinking of going to a church and pretend to be a believer so i could have a community again lol

175 notes · View notes

kyros-tha-soldier · 4 months ago

Text

ODA IF I EVER CATCH YOU-

#I am re-entering my depressed era with this panel #Bonney and Kuma and Ginny DID NOT deserve all of this shit!#God forbid a man and a woman with intense childhood trauma live together happily and raise their cute baby together in a healthy relationsh #The world government said “nuh uh” that's why #Anyways... ODA STOP THIS SHIT I AM WARNING YOU!#THIS IS NOT THE FIRST TIME YOU BRING A HOT HANDSOME BUFF DILF WITH A SAD ASS BACKSTORY AND KILL HIS BEAUTIFUL SASSY PINKETTE PARTNER-#AND HAVE THEM TORTURED BOTH PHYSICALLY AND MENTALLY FOR THE SAKE OF MEETING UP WITH THEIR CHILD!!!#Bartholomew Kuma #Spoiler #What chapter are we on again?#Ginny one piece #Jewelry bonney

20 notes · View notes

solei-eclipse · 3 months ago

Text

okay. hello guys. my bad for not responding to stuff or being as active recently, had a lot of work to be done and other stuff to focus on that took a lot of my time. I wanted to make more art, but I unfortunately had to put that energy into other things (which got to the point where I could not put them off any longer and had to stay working on it). I know I missed a lot of stuff and I'm sorry for it

#unfortunately there are moments where i am forced back into reality #and i remember that i cannot actually spend my life creating and hiding away forever!!! crazy #honestly a lot of it has also been the fact that i am just tired everytime i get home #and my health issues that have been steadily building up #they're really catching up on me and ive been having to visit the clinic more than im happy with #theres just a constant sense of fatigue nowadays #also uh #admittedly my interesting in Alien Stage has been waning #not replaced by any other media in particular. just started focusing on irl life stuff more often #which is why i barely post on shakingparadigm anymore/dont really post anything of substance #its really mostly this alnst oc thing that makes me want to stay because i genuinely enjoy and adore what we've created here #im pretty invested in this even though im not as invested in the source material anymore #not to say i dont like alnst anymore! i still do. i just don't dedicate all my attention to it anymore #which is for the best actually. because admittedly the things and time i have sacrificed for alnst did create a few consequences #sometimes i forget how bad a hyperfixation can fuck me up #again I'm really sorry for everything I've missed #and for being late to apris birthday #and the solauri round #and more #amazing stuff that you guys have made #me bones just dont work like they used to i fear. please give me time #im.sorry again #sorry this post might seem kind of depressing #just dont mind it if you want #thanks for your time #misc #rant #(?)#vent

15 notes · View notes

ultfreakme · 11 days ago

Text

Oh I do not like that two of my ships right now has someone that's deeply oppressed on a systematic level in their story having to set aside their own morals and values for their extremely privileged lover who does not bother to truly understand their pain, often trying to make excuses for the oppressors.

#jayjon #caitvi #LOOK IT'S DEEPLY PERSONAL TO ME #I am very privileged on many fronts but also not #i don't like white people #people are trying to justify caitlyn rn #if it looks like a cop and talks like a cop it's a COP #she didn't need to go this far #she didn't need to fucking poison the air the people of zaun breathe #she didn't need to be so brutal- that was a choice #and none of this got her any closer to jinx #Jinx fucking lured her in #HER GIRLFRIEND WHO SHE SHOULD LOVE IS ZAUN #Idc if cait was raised with these kind of thoughts #i'm allowed to be mad at the fascist in the making idc idc #Vi suffered SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE OF ENFORCERS #enforcers killed her parents- they put her in prison for practically all of her childhood #Mel lost her home-her mother is actively conspiring against her- she lost her brother- and yet she KNOWS when it's too far #cassandra gave her the damn key hoping cait would be better #she sure as fuck is totally respecting her mom right by using the thing she made to POISON PEOPLE #'she's grieving- she's depressed'- she's calling people animals i don't think she was too far from this kinda mentality #like why is it such a steep slide for her?#her environment shaped her yeah but that's an explanation- not an excuse to go easy on her #again- MEL MEDARDA #also jon asking jay to fucking go easy on Nia when she COLONIZED HIS COUNTRY SHUT THE FUCK UP

9 notes · View notes

sayumikemi13 · 25 days ago

Text

BIGGEST SPOOK THIS OCTOBER???

BOO!

Till is dead

Vivinos gave us both the trick and the treat, New Update, Hot Outfits, and Dead Till, had to rub him dying in our faces..

Watch Alien Stage y'all, I need someone to cope with.

16 notes · View notes

tonysdumplings · 1 year ago

Text

NO ONE HOME BUT THE VOID IS LOUD

ECHOES AROUND MY EMPTY HOUSE

SYNAPSES ARE SLOWING DOWN

THIS MUST BE THE VOID THEY ALWAYS TALK ABOUT

#paramore #sanity (demo)#hayley williams #this is why #this song is so after laughter coded hayley did not lie #depression funk is back baby #i am obsessed with this song now #proven once again that This Is Why is album of the year

65 notes · View notes

pinkponydiaz · 11 hours ago

Text

eddie moves to texas, leaving buck in la, but crucially does not tell chris, just says he’ll see him soon. chris and eddie spend time together, are doing okay, chris wants to know how long a time off bobby gave his dad to visit texas, eddie informs chris that he actually lives here now and thinks chris will like his new room. chris is horrified because he never wanted to stay in texas. a call back to eddie quitting the 118, ‘i thought that’s what you wanted/i never said that” and chris is like well what now i don’t want to live in texas i want to go home, where’s buck? and eddie is once again tortured by the idea that he’s doing everything wrong because he uprooted his life, chris’s life, bucks life, and none of them wanted it. chris tells eddie to call buck immediately and eddie does and then we cut to bucks loft, where he’s sitting on eddies old couch with red eyes, raises the ringing phone, glances at the name, and then silences it and puts it back down, raises a beer and drinks in silence, shot exactly like the post-breakup scene but without eddie.

#buddie #divorce round 3 #I am ready for the angst #queue bucks realization #eddie so badly needs to get in contact with buck #Buck doesn’t want to talk to Eddie because he just got left behind again #and it stings #and his sister is missing #and he’s left his manic baking era #for his depressed girl era #and he gets 45 tattoos in a week #especially on his thighs #please give him ostarks thigh tats #and then buck is going out on the town #let buck fuck #and he’s wearing his tiny running shorts and flirting with randos to ignore the eddie eddie eddie eddie in his head #and meanwhile eddie is fighting with his parents who want him to stay #but Chris wants to go #but eddie is already subletting their house #and buck won’t answer #he hasn’t even texted eddie back #and chris tries to find buck on find my friends but his location is off now #and now eddie is frustrated because what the fuck buck #and he’s pissed at buck for not picking up and leaves an annoyed voicemail #apologizing but also telling him to call him back because I know you’re upset but this is ridiculous buck we don’t do this #and then it turns out that buck was hit by a car leaving #and his phone was crushed which is why his location isn’t working #and nobody calls eddie because he left #but Denny texts Chris that he hopes buck will be okay #and chris is like????

15 notes · View notes

meownotgood · 24 hours ago

Text

deep down in my cold dead heart. I always knew they were going to make him more mage-arcane-herald but.... yeah............. yeah it's over

#the hex claw was the one machine thing I thought they'd keep #he literally made his own in the show #what am I looking at. why is it void #why is the hex claw made of firewood #where is his armor he's so skinny #it just confirms everything #like ok he's gonna get resurrected again #just gonna pop out like that with the bundle of twigs on his back #he's not gonna augment himself #doesn't get to choose his own path when it's literally the entire point of his original character #sorry for the depression posting it's just over for me I fear 😭#it's definitely the angle that makes the model look turbo ugly #but just seeing that so clearly void hex claw made my heart sink #goodbye machine herald I loved you with all of my heart #saw some people saying it's a skin but I seriously doubt it the skin was the one icon lol #HASHTAG NOT MY GLORIOUS EVOLUTION

7 notes · View notes