#bad friend

[brilliantreddstella]

If someone gets mad at you for playing into a joke they made about you, it wasn't a joke. It took me years figuring that one out because I struggled with social cues, but now that I know that red flag, the second I see it, I shut down from that friendship.

[mybelovedneitherdoyou]

At this point in my life I really don't have the time and energy for people with a victim complex. If I express an issue and you put up a fight that's IT. I am done with people who take no responsibility. You will not get an ounce of guilt out of me for standing up for myself.

[an-elveinthesky]

Not a single wound on my soul has been inflicted by an enemy. Not a single dart pierced in my heart has been thrown by my nemesis. Not a single one.

—Akshita Singh

[chickennuggetslover143]

im tired of feeling ignored.

[dy-mph-na]

Poetry about fake friends and envy.

[writtenroses1813]

When you made absolutely sure everyone was included at all times - making group chats only you texted in with no reply, asking about their days, making sure everyone had a chance to talk when hanging out - only for them to push you out and act like you were nothing to them <<<<<

[almebadface]

como se siente haberle rogado a todos tus amigos de jugar con vos y q ninguna te aceptara pq según estaban ocupados pero en vrd era q no querían jugar con vos

necesito amigos

[tinkerbitch69]

You know who I can’t stand?

People who try to tell you the motivation behind your actions because they think they know you better than you know yourself.

Fuck those guys.

[arcadiascherry]

how i look after my bsf embarrasses me infront of boys for attention.

[mangoofthesea]

I saw a post today talking about how difficult making friends can be, as well as maintaining friendships, and as someone who has spent the last few years learning how to maintain friendships while moving a couple times and some big life events. One of the best things you can do for a friendship is organise to do THINGS.

Not just meet and talk or chat over message. Arrange to go swimming, or for a row boat ride, cook dinner together, try making clay creatures and laugh at how bad they are. Go to see a play or a singer or a waterfall.

Sit on a call together in silence while you crochet or watch something at the same time in different locations.

Or while you both draw or do dishes and say the random questions that come to mind 'do you think aliens could exist?' 'How can you tell when you're in love?' 'There’s a really cool bird out the window I think you'd like it, it's all blue and green!'

The key is to not try to keep the friendship for the sake of it, but enjoy the Person and their company

Maintaining of a friendship over time requires effort, but also acceptance that you won't speak or see each other all the time. My 3 best friends are all from different phases of life and I have had periods of months or years where I didn’t speak to them just because we had shifted how much we saw each other.

You see them when you see them, you speak when you speak, but you'll find people who with even a tiny amount of effort (a birthday gift, a card, a meme sent, a message or a gif) you can hold onto. People who mean the world to you even though you only see them a could times a year.

I once heard the phrase that friends are like stars, even when you don't see them, they're still there.

Friendships that truly mean something aren't like sitcoms or movies. Life is more complicated and people are too, don't feel bad if your friendships don't match up to what you expect, or if you can't be there all the time.

All things considered, I'm a pretty shit friend sometimes, I forget birthdays and I'm useless to get hold of sometimes. But on either side of friendships that I have, we both make enough of an effort that they're still there.

I'm going to the cinema tomorrow with a friend I've had since I was 11 (or 13 depending how we've decided to measure it that day) and I haven't seen in person in nearly a year. We're still going to have a great time.

Your friendship takes whatever form works for you, don't lose sight of the people you love cos the way you love them doens’t look like 'it's supposed to'

[ayaisnotokay]

I have a lot of one sided friendships. I'm also the one starting conversations, suggesting plans, or just trying to share things. It rarely feels like it's returned.

I want to believe people care, but how can they? Surely you think about someone you care about? You should want to reach out with them and spend time together.

I'm tired of fighting for seconds of my friend's time when it feels like they wouldn't willingly take a minute of mine.

I guess I finally understand the 48 laws of power a little bit better. They say you should be distant and present your presence as a rarity.

if your time is a commodity you can't treat it like air. When something is so readily available, it's inevitably taken for granted. It seems that in being forever unavailable, your time is preciously coveted.

I suppose that's why people never come to me when they're free. Maybe I'm trying too hard. So they just figure, "she'll be there tomorrow," but tomorrow never seems to come.

[bracketmaxx]

They're all fine with you having social anxiety, until you show a symptom of social anxiety or say that you can't do something because of it. Then, in their minds, you stop being a socially anxious person, and instead become a bad person.

[an-elveinthesky]

Surviving too many friendships with women who secretly held animosity towards me while all I wanted was sisterhood has left my tea table gray with poison

and I drink it everyday.

- Akshita Singh

[lifefactz]

[dy-mph-na]

Life Advice - Finding Friends When you Feel Invisible

Disingenuity will get you nowhere in life, I mean obviously– we all have our moments where a white lie slips out, sometimes it is necessary. I mean more of a hiding, than lies per-say. Your true identity, lots of people are ashamed of themselves. What they like, or how they talk. 

All this is, is conditioning from boring people, much lower than you. I have met too many cool people, who were shunned to a point of constant anxiety and quietness.

Know that a closed mouth will never get fed. You cannot find community by isolating, or muting yourself. I used to always wonder why nobody wanted to be my friend, they didn’t want to be around me. I lost everything and everyone, it caused me to be more myself. Past me, was hungry for validation– it showed. I was a selective mute, and I took things seriously. I was surrounded by people who tore me down in unsuspecting ways. 

Now I am a popular loner,

Other people do beg to be in my energy– and actually, I've been so isolated and alone to the point where I enjoy my solitude. I would pray for this, at a time when I had nobody and was invisible.

I know the feeling of wanting to be wanted; it is not nice.

The only true way is to detach, and just do it. It feels weird at first,

 but once you’ve acted that way in a new environment long enough, that just becomes you, and it doesn’t feel weird.

Eventually people just expect that from you.

If you’re socially awkward, just embrace it. People will accept your deemed “negative” trait as a positive one, but only if it is paired with confidence.