#who up rizzing it up in depression

[tyresdeg]

not again

[theactualsunshinechild]

My brain has been full of Dan Heng dynamics lately. Dan Heng is running out of hands for all these men he's pulling.

He's got a traumatic kill or be killed situationship with his past life's ex husband

He's got a general who was crushing on his last life now re-meeting and re-crushing anew on him

He's got some guy (or gal) he picked up off the ground on the space station with a bomb in his chest who keeps bringing him literal trash and stealing books and burrowing into his heart

And now he's got a depressed cyborg cowboy criminal with a swearing problem on that ride or die attitude for him and trying to ride him about it now that they've gotten past the classic held at gunpoint greeting.

Unmatched rizz, and he asked for none of it.

[hysteria-things]

SNEAK AWAY (part two)

read part one here

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: nate x sls!reader

𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: you and nate are still going strong, but a lot of fans notice a few things in the new video…

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬: FLUFF, swearing

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨����𝐧𝐭: 539

𝐚𝐮𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐫'𝐬 𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞: short and sweet!

chris fic tomorrow😌 (or tonight it depends when i start writing it)

y/nsturniolo

liked by madifilipowicz and 23,492 others

y/nsturniolo hawaii dump with my favorite people ever😌🌺☀️🏝️🩷

4,940 comments

nicolassturniolo yup yup yup

user you’re so pretty

↳ y/nsturniolo i love you🥹

↳ user HOLY SHIT HI QUEEN

nathandoe8 hey (with rizz)

↳ matthew.sturniolo what the hell

↳ user YIKES LMAOOO

↳ user praying for you nate🙏

madifilipowicz 🎉💕🌊

user what’s with all the nate pics🤨

↳ y/nsturniolo idk :/

user why do i ship her and nate🫣

↳ user THIS

↳ christophersturniolo no lol

“boys, please leave your sister alone.“ you hear your mother scold from outside of the bedroom door.

you guys got back from hawaii two days ago, but the triplets are staying in boston for an extra week before going back to LA.

“do not barge in there—” she scolds again, but it’s too late when the door swings open.

the three of them stand there panting, while marylou looks at them with her hands on her hips. it doesn’t end there; trevor comes running in and jumps on your bed.

his tail wags as he climbs onto your lap, leaving kisses on your face.

nick turns to her. “she’ll survive, mom.”

she sighs, walking out of your vision. your brothers stare at you like you’re in trouble. “we need to talk.” chris says, crossing his arms.

oh boy.

“about?”

they side eye each other. “you and nate.” matt says.

oh boy.

you clear your throat, trying not to barf everywhere. “w-what do you mean?”

“have you not seen the clips or comments?” chris asks, them now walking over to your bed and sitting. at this point, trevor has fallen asleep on your legs.

“no,” you answer, playing with the dog’s ears.

“girl.” nick tuts, pulling out his phone and tapping buttons before turning it to you. “look at this.”

you take his phone, scrolling through the comments on a tiktok.

thank GOD i’m not the only one who thought this

they HAVE to be hiding something they seem a little too close in this video😭

damn y’all detectives or something💀

imagine this is how nick, matt, and chris find out LMAOOOO

i always shipped them they seem so cute together :(

you stop scrolling the comments and watch the video. it’s a compilation of you and nate in the background.

one of the clips is when you guys were in the restaurant, and your chin rests on nate’s shoulder as the both of you look over something on his phone.

another clip is when you guys are walking, you and nate in the back of the group with his hand brushing against yours.

a few others show the way you two look at each other, eyes full of love and lust.

maybe you guys weren’t being as slick as you thought.

you hand nick’s phone back, nuzzling more into your blanket. “why didn’t you tell us?!” chris exclaims.

you shrug. “‘cause you’ll kill him.”

they roll their eyes. “we won’t kill him. we’ll threaten him.” nick clarifies.

as if that’s any better.

walking hand in hand, you and nate make way through the local park that's bare at this hour of the night. “so you’re telling me i should look out for threats?”

“yeah.” you smile, looking up at him before he gives you a sneak-attack kiss.

he sighs. “i’m kind of glad we don’t need to sneak away anymore. it got so depressing.”

you laugh, followed by an exhale. words cannot explain how much you love this kid. even though it was a hard launch to the public, you’re happy that you can show him off now. to make sure people know he’s yours and you’re his.

hopefully, no threats or killings take place by your overprotective siblings.

𝐭𝐚𝐠 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭!

@bunbunbl0gs @lexisecretaccx @thy-mission @angelic-sturniolos111 @sophssturn @mattsneezing @janiellasblog @blahbel668 @meg-sturniolo @hearts4chris @mattslolita @sturnbaby @imwetforyourmom @tillies33ssss @sturnifyed @mayhem-72 @ripmattitude @p1xieswrld @alorsxsturn @txssvx @sttzee @multiluvr @delilahprentiss @matthewsspecial @sturnolio-luvs @sturniolho @suga-daddy-69 @tworosesblackthorn @luckistar-posts @gnxosblog @junnniiieee07 @sturnioloslurps @tylerthecreatorsrealwife @flowerxbunnie @imaslut4kehlani @sturniolosandmoree @hertvgirl @whoreforchrissturniolo @r4iyaa @sturniolotriplettoplover @mattybswife @freshsturns @loverrsposts @saturncanyon @elliesturniolo1

[corphneux707]

Dr. Ratio x Child! Reader

Headcanons of child reader who he accidentally isekai'd due to an accident during an experiment. Written as platonic and gender neutral!

・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・

First off, he'd actually feel bad for accidentally transporting you.

Like c'mon, you're literally a kid. So that means he'll take the responsibility of taking care of you for the meantime, until he finds a way to send you back.

Your opinion of him started to get better overtime. At first, he looked scary. Especially when the first hour of you being transported, he looked scary as he berated some poor soul working in the experiment.

He starts off slow in trying to get along with you, which wasn't THAT tough considering he's the only adult you could depend on.

But he's quite considerate of you.

You'll have your own room and your own stuff. It just took quite a bit of coaxing for you to show what you like without 'shying away'

Actually, you weren't shy at all. You were scared, as Ratio deduced.

It made more sense, everything in this world was new to you.

The toughest part that he had to handle with you is with your attachment to your family. The crying, tantrums, the constant "I miss them..."

It was hard to watch you get depressed

This is where Ratio steps in. He comforts and distracts you from your problems.

This is how he gets close to you overtime by being the adult you could lean on for comfort and overall for everything a child needs.

He'd wipe your tears.

Wipe a tissue on your runny nose. (Albeit, in his dismay).

He'd let you hug him as you cried yourself to sleep. His hugs weren't comfortable, but it was secure.

He even listens to you words, even when you choke on sobs between your garbled sentences.

Feed you after assuring that the foreign looking food is tasty and good for you.

Play games with you

Answers all your questions no matter how absurd they are

His face through all of this? Usually a straight face per usual.

Every once in a while, he'd smile when he manages to give you something that you like.

He's especially happy when you start to pick up some habits of his or manage to apply his teachings to you.

There's something about it that strokes his ego and makes him proud of you.

Speaking of teachings, in the early times where you started living with him, he couldn't just leave you alone at home.

Which is why, sometimes you'd be brought along into the guild.

You'd be sat in a corner where you could be easily seen playing with some kind of silent digital toy.

At first, it was surprising for you to watch a student get hit by a chalk because they weren't paying attention. Nowadays, its kind of expected.

Afterclass, you are SWAMPED by countless students fawning over you.

Aeon help them if you smile at them and show them what you like. You're way too precious for their hearts.

The difference between how he treats his students and you is outstanding. He's usually gentle with you, but still somewhat stern.

Your toys mostly have some underlying lesson that'll help you develop your brain. Like, puzzles or mazes.

Show him what you accomplished and you get a smug face from him after he says you did a good job.

Proud dad, really.

Would brag about it.... by incorporating it into his unsults.

"If your problem still hasn't been solved, is it possible that the problem is you? Even a my child could do better."

Or something like that.

On the other hand of your accomplishments is Ratio's dismay of your antics

You're a child, yes. But he finds himself always questioning what the hell goes on in your little head.

You learn all the types of sighs this man has

Theres the annoyed sigh. Bored sigh, and many more.

The most type of sigh you get is the 'What the hell? I'm too tired for this' with the 'What the actual fuck does that mean?' look

Imagine saying present slang like gyatt, fanun tax, rizz.

Like-

You'll see a student admiring Dr. Ratio while he's seated beside you during lunch and you'll say to him "Wow, you have a lot of rizz"

Or when you're trying on matching outfits and then you ask, "Do you feel bonita?"

He's ???? but picks up on it by context clues.

Eventually he'll be incorporating it when he talks to you.

It's like your silly little codes (to you atleast) between the two of you !!

Baths with him are really nice. You get pampered alot by getting a head massage as he shampoos your head, at the same time you get to play with the bubbles and his rubber duckies!

When its bed time, he tucks you in and makes sure that you are asleep.

Usually when he works late, he'll come into your room to check on you. He'll fix your blanket so it completely covers you and pats your head softly before going to sleep in his own room :3

That's all for now. I'm in the process of making a fic and adding more stuff. I didn't even think I'd go this far but oh well.

Thank you for reading one of my first few posts!!

[the-fandom-is-now-my-life]

So uh...I know the odds of this happening is slim to none, but I figure I'll shoot my shot: the Creator having a little one, who is sporting a small diamond marking on their forehead? (Xiao, it's Xiao as the dad.) And for fun: Venti somehow gets blamed for this! :D

Tsarita: The Yaksha has an Anemo Vision. Of course someone who uses the element of Barbatos would be so forward as to try something with the Creator!

Venti: I DID NOTHING, WHY AM I BEING BLAMED?!

A forever diamond

WC: ~600

Cw: Raiden is alloyist 😔

Imagine if this happened close to cloud retainer and she just side eyes Xiao like "this one is impressed the conqueror of demons has, what the younger generations call, rizz"

Xuezhui’s birthdays are a whole event for liyue, somewhat of an unofficial holiday, people are often given half day or the whole day to roam the streets, different vendors setting stalls with food and trinkets.

A room would get rented in the xinyue salon and the seven stars and the archons would accompany for lunch and a small dessert for the toddler.

As you finish eating and leave Xuezhui on the floor she starts running to a small group of children, zhongli trailing behind her so you could finish your conversation with keqing.

Regal as when he was an archon zhongli stands a few meters away from the little group of children playing tag. Sometimes he can't help but let himself drift in his thoughts, Xuezhui is so similar to Xiao when he rescued him, even when only a handful of people remember that day he can see it as clear as day. Could Xiao have spent his younger life as carefree as this little girl?

Suddenly he is snapped from his daydream by a scream and sobbing.

“What is it, little one?” zhongli leans forward where xuezhui was seated crying, some of her friends surrounding her. He saw her fall while chasing each other but it didn't seem hard enough for her to not keep playing.

“It hurrrttss” her hands clasped on her forehead, tear clouding her eyes.

“Let me see” softly he pries her hands away, expecting to see some flushed skin, maybe a bruise or some blood but it was neither of those, rather it was a small purple diamond “...interesting”

“What happened over here?” Quickly you walk towards them, worried about the soft sniffles and suddenly falling to the floor. She makes grabby hands so you perch her on your hip, smoothing her hair.

“Someone can't refuse her inheritance for too long” he taps between his brows, letting you know. Swiftly you move her bangs, showing a small diamond just under her hairline.

“I thought it was make up”

“it would make sense with his depressive persona but as you already know adepti have no need for vision and merely wear one to comply with human expectations,” he picks something up from the floor, a small golden plate before placing it on the silk in the back of her dress “on the contrary, half adeptus like Ganyu need a vision to canalize elemental energy yet can use adeptal features to hone their abilities”

“I can barely manage her as it's, don't tell me that was a vision”

His hand falls on your shoulder, a stiff smile trying not to laugh at you “I would invest in fire insurance”

Seemingly your defeated face was very visible, even from a few meters away, or you took a fair amount of time, as some archon and Ningguang were approaching you.

“Is anything wrong I could help with?” Ningguang speaks first, wandering what might have happened.

“Xuezhui fell, just a small nick on the forehead” zhongli snickers behind you.

“if she hurt herself I'm sure Dr Baizhu wouldn't mind checking her up quickly” she attempts to check her but you change her to the other side, attempting to hide her mark.

“She is fine, she just got scared and is a bit cuddly”

“oh, what a shame, I wanted to try her beloved almond tofu but if she is so stuck with you we will have to leave it for another occasion”

“Almond tofu! Let's go” she jumps out of your arms and jumps towards Raiden, who notices instantly the soft purple diamond “mmh, what is this?” she swipes her thumb over it but it doesn't smudge, the edges perfectly neat.

“Who does that remind me of?” Venti taps his chin.

“the vigilant yaksha?...” Ningguang mumbles under her breath. She did know he took the role of your bodyguard but never thought your relationship would be so more intimate

“So in the end it WAS your fault…”

“but he is from Liyue! It's Morax’s fault!”

“But he has an anemo vision”

“What is that supposed to mean?!”

“All anemo vision holders are libertine or lazy”

“Hey! That is alloyism!”

“who would have guessed this would work out nicely for me”

[ihatehomework]

yall i miss jily😭😭😭 not like its gone but like the marauders used to be so happy sunshine gryffindor vibes. but also i feel like we collectively all forget how much james potter HATED slytherin. idk i also think that yes death eaters were humans BUT they also killed so many people like are we forgetting that barty crouch jr literally tortured alice and frank longbottom he is at fault for neville growing up without his parents😭 i genuinely think that people forget that evan, barty etc. actually killed people and killed people who were probably friends with the marauders. ik that everyone deserves a second chance but seriously???? do you actually think that the rosiers were good people and didn't hate and discriminate against muggleborns??? NOT EVERYONE HAS A TRAGIC BACKSTORY IDK SOME OF THEM ARE JUST EVIL. the way everyone defends evan rosier (love his character but i have beef with the way he gets away with being a death eater later on) but snape, who i absolutely detest, hate and think should have died earlier, who also actually did something that was not evil in his lifetime, is the most hated marauders character like????? and the black sisters???? yes love a complex female character but are we seriously trying to redeem bellatrix? do we not remember WHAT SHE SCARED ON HERMIONE LIKE WHAT. and love the newer marauders fandom but everyones so emo and depressed this is supposed to be FUN. also the characters feel so ooc. everytime i see casanova remus lupin im like 'huh thats supposed to be sirius and james???' love remus but my boy aint rizzing anyone up hes a shy af introvert. and jegulus is so cute but remember that james is #no.1slytherinhater and he was absolutely smitten with lily evans FROM THE FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL. REMEMBER WHEN JILY WAS THE BACKBONE OF THE MARAUDERS? like they ate fr. this became a whole ass paragraph damn i did not know i had so much to say about this. i can lowkey already sniff the comments or thoughts saying 'oh let us have our fun its just a story' im not stopping you this is just my opinion. 'oh none of this is actually proven' please give me a break😭🙏 like most of the source material goes against the fandoms perception of the marauders. 'fuck jkr we'll do what we want' youve basically just made 10 million ocs and give them names of characters like im eating up all the marauders content but genuinely can we go back to the happier times??

[megantheestallion-ismypresident]

"She's confident."

Duke dennis x black!reader

Summary: after duke and his girlfriend broke up he hasn't been talkative with his friends or hasn't gone out, so his friends take him out, because he hasn't been active so they take him to the store to go get something to eat, until duke saw this pretty ass girl at the store trying to shoot his shot but her confidence made him down bad for her.

Duke hasn't been the same after his break up with Kali. Kali and him had a nice relationship he was in love with her, and he thought the relationship was gonna last forever, but their relationship got a bit distant. Duke has been streaming a lot, and Kali was more worried and busy on her music career, and everything just fell apart from there. Duke hasn't been the same. He has been distant during the whole thing. He's been streaming a lot lately so he can distract himself from his heartbreak. Even his friends noticed, took.

Kai was in his room chatting with fanum. "Yo, I ain't neva seen this nigga that sad, bruh." Kai said with a concerned look thinking about duke's well being on the breakup. "Real shit, he been streaming alot lately to distract himself, like I would be putting him on with some girl because he hasn't been dating in a while ever since kali." Fanum said to Kai. "Right, that one time I was streaming with him we were talking to some girls, and the girls were trying to rizz the nigga up, and he wasn't even interested." Kai said to fanum as fanum made a disbelief look.

"Nah, we gotta get him out there he can't be stuck on kali forever, my nigga." Kali said to fanum rubbing his eyes since he's been stressed and tired after he finished streaming.

"Yo I'm mad hungry, I haven't eaten all day." Fanum said as kai gave him 'you lying' look. "Thats a lie nigga, I ain't never seen you get through the day without eating." Kai laughs as fanum fake laughs. "I know you ain't talking, grow nigga you like 4 foot something." Fanum jokes as kai gave him a look.

"Wait hold on I think I got a idea to get duke out the house, bruh." Kai said as he smiles having a good idea. "So we go to the store with duke, right? We get some snacks and if we see him eyeing a fine ass girl at the store we gon hook a nigga up." Kai smiles like kid seeing candy. Fanum thinks and then nod his head in a agreeing manner. "Ok, nigga I see you." Fanum smiles as he daps kai up.

"OK who paying because I ain't trying spend my money not gon lie." Fanum says. "Don't worry I'm gonna pay." Kai says as he gets up from his chair as fanum follows behind. Kai and fanum went to duke's room seeing him on his phone depressed.

"Aye, duke let's go to the store we ready." Kai said as he looks at Duke.

"Alright, who driving?" Duke questions as he gets up from his chair.

"I wanna drive." Fanum and kai says at the same and they gave each other a confused look.

"No, bro I'm driving I said it." Kai says back to fanum.

"Yo, you short as fuck you not reaching the steering wheel and your feet ain't gon touch the ground, nigga." Fanum laughs as kai look back at him irritatingly.

"I know you ain't talking yo big ass not gonna fit inside the car." Kai laughs at his joke as fanum look back at him with "nigga shut up" look.

"Why you always on my dick, bro" fanum says irritatingly as kai gave him a look in disbelief in shock.

"Nigga you be on my dick, fuck is you talkin bout." Kai argues back at fanum.

"Alright, I'm finna drive because yall nigga are just talking." Duke says walking past them as he taking the car keys. Kai and fanum follow behind duke as they make it outside walking towards the parked car.

Duke unlocks the car as they got in the car, duke drives off. They drove in completely silence which was really weird because when they usually be in the car they be loud as fuck, playing music and just having a fun time, but ever since duke and kali broke up, duke hasn't been the same lately.

As they made it to the store. Duke parked his car as they got out the car as the cold breeze touches their face. "Damn it's cold as shit out here." Kai says as shakes a little bit from the cold weather. "Why you ain't bring you jacket?" Duke question as they walked inside the store. "Because since fanum and I were arguing I ain't paid no attention of bringing my jacket." Kai responds back as fanum starts silently chuckling.

"That's what your ass get for arguing with me nigga." Fanum laughs as he childishly points finger at kai as kai hits his hand away.

"Bro shut yo bitch ass up, nigga." Kai says to fanum, duke crack a little smile as he hears kai and fanum arguing from behind him.

"Alright I'm gonna get me something to drink and to get away from y'all niggas before you embarrass me in this store." Duke says as he walks away from kai and fanum. Duke went towards the beverage isle as he stands infront of the fridge looking for something to eat. Duke heard the door open with that little bell ringing anytime someone enters the store.

Duke couldn't take his eyes off the woman that entered the store. She had locs in her hair that reached down to her waist. She had a black crop top, with some baggy pants, a belly button piercing, and white air forces. The pretty woman walks Duke's way, they made eye contact as the woman smiles at him. Duke wanted you, even if he didn't know you. Your smile was attractive, the way you walked with such confidence, the way you sway your hips when you walk.

Duke saw kai and fanum at the chips isl as they were talking with each other. "Yo, guys." Duke whispers as he caught kai and fanum's attention. "What, bro?" Kai asks. "I saw this fine ass girl coming my way and she smiled at me, not that 'nice, wholesome' type shit, like that attractive shit." Duke explains which made fanum and kai intrigued.

"Go talk to her nigga." Fanum looks at him urgently wanting him to go talk to the girl.

"Wait I gotta pay all this for you niggas." Duke says. "Don't worry I'm gonna pay me and fanum gonna be waiting for you in the car." Kai says as to duke, duke look a bit nervous second guessing. "Go, nigga we got you." Fanum insists.

"Alright imma go- wait you had money this whole time and you just me to waist my money, nigga." Duke asks questions as kai awkwardly smiles knowing he's been caught.

"We gonna go to the car, gotta go nigga." Kai says urgently as fanum follows behind as duke sees them paying for they snacks, kai and fanum look back at duke giving him a thumbs up as they left the store.

Duke takes a deep breath as he walks toward the candy isle seeing the woman was still there. Duke was next to her but not to close not wanting to seem like a stalker. Duke was looking at what candy he gonna get but he was looking back at the girl who was picking which candy she was gonna get.

"I know you're staring, I mean, I'm a pretty girl, but you can just ask." Y/n says to Duke, not looking at him. "Damn, hold on i'm -" Duke was about to apologize, but she cut him off. "Nah, I'm just messing around. It's cool." Y/n says calm as she looks back at Duke. "Oh shit your duke." Y/n says smiling as Duke smiles back. "You know me?" Duke asks. "Yeah, I know you. I watch Amp all the time." Y/n admits as she grabs a 'Twix' bar. "Damn, why did you -" Duke was gonna say something, but y/n cuts him off. "I don't really do that extra shit when I see a celebrity. You know y'all are people too." Y/n says as she walks as Duke follows her.

"Also them niggas at new York y'all were giving PC's to were doing to fucking much." Y/n says as she went towards the chip isle as duke grab some 'Hot cheetos'. "Yeah them niggas was buggin, acting crazy." Duke answers back Making y/n laugh. "Wait, I ain't get your name." Duke says as y/n stops in her tracks. "It's Y/n." Y/n bit her bottom lip as she continues walking.

"Pretty name for a pretty ass girl." Duke says making y/n smile. "I know nigga, don't play." Y/n and Duke laughed as they walk towards the register as they continue talking.

"Hey I know we just met, but can I get your number." Duke does his infamous rizz smile which y/n couldn't say no to. "Sure." Y/n agrees as duke offer his phone to her as she writes her number in his contacts. Y/n pulls out her wallet but duke stops her. "Nah let me pay for you." Duke insists. "Nah I'm a big girl I can pay for my own stuff, baby." Y/n smirks making duke heart melt. The way she said 'baby' made him feel some type of way. The man at the counter gave him the snacks in the bag.

"It was nice meeting you, y/n." Duke says as y/n looks up at him with a picture perfect smile. As duke and y/n head out of the store they grabbed their snack from inside the bag as there hands touch making them look at each other not breaking eye contact. Y/n kisses duke on the cheek as she smiles at him she comes closer and whispered in his ear. "Call me." Y/n whispers as she walks away from him as she walks towards her car.

Duke walks towards his car getting inside. "Yo, we saw everything outisde nigga, she want you for real." Kai smiles exciting hyping duke up.

"Did you get her number? That's the main question." Fanum asks duke. "Hell yeah, I got her number, nigga." Duke says as kai and fanum shouts hyping Duke up.

Duke starts the car as duke was telling the whole story the whole car ride home. They made it home as they was still talking about it. "You gonna text her?" Kai asks as duke thinks.

"I don't know bruh?" Duke responds not really sure what to do.

"Bro text her so she knows you interested don't boring with it though." Fanum gives duke some advice as they walked inside the house. "Not gonna lie I'm tired as hell." Kai yawns. "Alright I'm boutta go upstairs" Duke says. "Alright night, bro." Fanum says walking to his room.

Duke walked upstairs as he went inside his room, he heard phone buzzed as he turns his phone on he sees that you texted him.

"Y/n: You wanna go out for dinner?" Y/n texted making duke smile at tye response.

"Duke: yeah, why not?" Duke texted back.

"Y/n: cool, night." Y/n texted back as she smiles as she turns her phone off and still smiling at the thought of Duke.

Duke smiles as he turn his lights off making it too bed still thinking about y/n, he couldn't stop thinking about her, duke is grateful to have kai and fanum putting him out there.

He finally was himself again, and he wasn't thinking about Kali anymore, and for that he was happy to have someone new in his life.

[sethcertified]

「 LEARNED FROM THE MOVIES ! 」 . . . 📂

harry potter : cedric diggory

wrd count : 3.4k

⊹˚.⋆ synopsis . . . cedric is hopefully in love with [name], but had been rejected time and time again. when he learns the rom com way (rizz) to winning a person’s heart, he tries it on [name]

⊹˚.⋆ starring . . . cedric diggory & male reader

It was hopeless.

That was what Cedric repeated to himself as he laid in the mess he called a bed. It seemed that every time he tried to woo you over, you rejected him! His advances always fell flat no matter how hard he tried.

His countless confessions always ended up with you giving him an awkward smile and saying later; although, by now he knew later would never come.

A frown scorned his face at the sound of the dorm's door creaking open. Cedric turned away from the soft light that poured through the door. He didn't want anyone seeing him; the hero of hufflepuff, so defeated.

"Cedric?" The familiar, feminine tilt of the voice made Cedric turn over to see who was asking for him. There stood Cho Chang; her scarf wrapped around her neck snug with a concerned expression decorating her face.

Cedric knew why she was here, but he couldn't even bother saying anything to the girl. He was hurting too much.

Small steps rang out as they got closer to Cedric's bed until they eventually stopped. A small, gentle hand placed itself on Cedric's shoulder, "Cedric?" Cho's voice was comforting and Cedric finally looked her in the eye; eyes rimmed red.

"Oh, Cedric," Cho cooed. She had never seen Cedric so hurt, but so many rejections do take it's toll at one point. Cedric was her best friend, and to see him so depressed made her heart swell in pity. "It'll be okay. If [Name] can't see that you're an amazing guy; he's dumb.

“Besides, there's ton of other fish in the sea," Cho flashed the heartbroken boy a smile to try to cheer him up, but Cedric's frown deepened.

Cedric sat up from his laid out position, brushing Cho's hand off his shoulder, "I don't want anyone else, Cho. I love him!" Cedric ran his fingers through his mop of brunette locks, "I need him to accept my feelings. I can't live without him."

Cho nodded as she processed Cedric's words.

She knew that he wouldn't accept any other propositions about what to do if it didn't end up with you in his arms. With a purse of her lips, an idea hit her. You loved rom coms! It seemed every other week you would be watching some type of muggle rom com with a love struck look in your eyes in the Ravenclaw common room.

All she needed to do now was to teach Cedric about these romance movies, so he could learn the techniques the male leads used that won your heart!

With an ambitious glint in her dark eyes, Cho took Cedric's hands and dragged him up, ready to show him the way to your heart. As the two stormed off to the Ravenclaw dorm, preparing to go through your DVD collection, they ran into the source of this adventure; you.

Your hands planted against Cedric's chest, balancing yourself before recollecting your composure and observing the two. Cho's hair has developed a bit of frizz, and the usual perfect placement of Cedric's hair was all over the place.

"Cedric! Cho! What are you two doing?" You asked as you awkwardly moved your hands away from Cedric's hard chest to your sides.

Cedric's eyes danced your face, taking in your breathtaking features as his perfect, pink lips spread open in response; leaving his lips agape with no words leaving his mouth. You had that charming yet awkward smile that usually occupied your face, and Cedric's mind had drawn a blank on the excuse he had thought of.

In luck, Cho was able to cover for Cedric who was staring at you, gaping like a fish, "We were actually looking for you!" A grimace placed itself on your face as you remembered how a few hours earlier you had rejected Cedric, and figured that that was the reason they wanted to see you. You turned to the boy with an apologetic expression, "I'm really sorry about earlier. We're good, right?" Cedric nodded dumbly before Cho cut into the conversation,

"Actually, Cedric, here is taking muggle studies, and he is doing a project on muggle movies! I always see you watching them in the common room and thought you might help him!"

Oh!" You rubbed the back of your neck awkwardly, "Well, I feel kinda stupid now, but, yeah, I can let you borrow some of my movies." You began to waltz off to the dorm as Cho gave Cedric a first pump from behind your back.

Cedric didn't return the enthusiasm; his attention being transfixed on the warmth your hands had left on his robes from the two of you running into each other.

The Ravenclaw dorm hadn't changed from the last time Cedric went in there to hang out with Cho. Everything had stayed the same. Cedric inhaled; getting wafted by the smell of candles, books, and ink. It smelt like you. You disappeared into the boy's dorm before coming out will a tall, leaning stack of DVDs. As you stepped forward toward the pair, the DVDS wobbled, and Cedric rushed to catch them. The tip of his fingers brushed against yours as they leaned against his chest. He sent you a cheesy smile, "That was a close one."

You nodded in agreement and moved to set the stack of movies on the tabletop. Cedric dawned a small frown at the feeling of your fingers leaving his, but quickly covered it when you turned back around to the two, "Well, here's my collection! What kind of movies are you looking for?”

Cedric stayed silent until Cho elbowed him, "Ow!" He gritted his teeth as he held his hip in pain, "Uh, Romance movies?"

Your eyes practically sparkled at the mention as you smiled like a just won the lottery and quickly sprung into a ramble, “I love romance movies! Everybody makes fun of me for liking them as much as I do with me being a guy and all, but who says guys can't like romance movies? They're always like, 'That's gay; and I'm like, 'Guess what? I am, so fuck off; but still, it is so exhausting." The glow in your eyes died down as you remembered the interaction which Cedric took immediate notice to. He placed his hand on your shoulder in an attempt to comfort you, "Well, if you ever want some company or someone to talk to about romance movies; l'm here."

Your eyes softened and the sparkle in your eye came back. You couldn't help but feel bad for never giving Cedric a chance. Sure, he was every students' dream guy with his tall, muscular body, dreamy eyes, and perfect, honeycomb eyes, but you didn't know him enough to ever consider him as a romantic option. The voice in your head that had so far been screaming at you to get away from Cedric was quiet, and you couldn't help but start to understand why everyone loved Cedric.

Cho stood to the side as she watched the two of you gaze into each others eyes like the other had hung the moon and smiled to herself. Her job here was down, and she turned away with lithe steps in the direction of the girls dorm room; planning to tell all her friends about her matchmaker activities with Hufflepuffs' golden boy and Ravenclaws' certified filmbro.

Cedric caught Cho's departure in his peripheral vision and tried to fight the urge drag her back.

What kind of wingwoman ditches mid-seduction? Your gaze followed to where Cedric's was glaring at and found that Cho had left, "Oh, Cho left. Did she have to go somewhere?"

Cedric forced a smile as he cursed at Cho internally, "Yeah, had a... thing to do in the library." You nodded and turned to your pile, trying to brush off the feelings that had overcame you while looking in Cedric's eyes.

Said boy was peering over your shoulder as you separated the movies into two piles. His brows furrowed trying to figure out how you were deciding which one you were giving him, and how he would manage to make you fall for him with them. He tapped your shoulder, "How are you separating them?"

"I'm giving you my favorite romance movies," you pointed at the huge stack, "That's all of my movies including the ones l'm giving you, so I gotta sort them out." Cedric nodded his head but wanted to keep talking to you, "Which ones are your favorites? I want to hear your thoughts on them for my project." He would pat himself on the shoulder if he could. That was one good lie.

You could feel yourself about to spring off into a ramble and scolded yourself internally. Most people shunned you for your rambles, but for some reason you couldn’t quite place, you felt comfortable enough with Cedric to let go of your embarrassment about rambling, “Well, that’s a tough question,” you chuckled nervously, “I would say 10 Things I Hate About You, The Notebook, and Flipped.”

Your fingers clenched the new found DVD of 10 Things I Hate About You, “This one is just so fun to watch, you know? My favorite scene is when the main guy, Patrick, is singing infront of everyone during her soccer practice just to apologize to her. It’s so sweet.”

Cedric felt himself fall for you even more as your eyes glowed with love, “That’s what I love about romance movies! The guys are always so devoted to proving their love. In The Notebook, he writes her a love letter everyday for a year.”

You spun around back to your collection, scouring for the other two movies. Your hand grasped the DVD for Flipped and you handed it to Cedric, “In this one, he plants a tree for her because the one she loved got cut down.” Your hands filtered through the pile as you searched for The Notebook before finally finding it, “Well, that’s all of them. I hope your project does well.”

Cedric traced the spine of the movies as he nodded nervously but with a goal set in place in his heart. If he could show you that he loved you by doing those things, you might just finally accept his feelings. He gave you a quick, "Thank you" before leaving you and preparing for the journey up ahead.

╰┈➤

It had taken a few try's but Cedric had figured out how to play the movies you had given him. He sat in-front of the movie that was starting with a journal and pencil in hand. The first movie was, The Notebook; and Cedric was ultra-focused on it. He remembered how you spoke so highly of the letters Noah had written Allie, and looked at the crisp, lined-sheet of paper. The quill that rested in between his fingers felt like a testament to his love for you. All he had to do know was write you something that would take your breath away.

Cedric's quill danced along the paper in swirls and loops as cursive took over the page. He wanted to make the letter look nice for you. His fingers were clenching the quill so hard to the point pain shot out of his finger tips. Cedric ignored the pain in his fingers as his letter neared to an end.

Cedric's fingers burned red as he dropped the quill onto his bed. His eyes scanned the now finished letter over and over; trying to guarantee it was perfect before he sent it off to you. With a pleased smile, Cedric set off to the owlery for you to open the letter tomorrow during breakfast.

And before he knew it, breakfast had arrived.

Cedric's eyes were latched onto you as he played around with the food on his plate anxiously. Cho sat next to you, sparing glances at Cedric every so often. Cedric had told Cho about what would happen during breakfast, and she was scouting your reaction for him.

The owls swept into the dining hall in unison, and Cedric felt his chest swell with anxiety. It wasn't exactly anonymous with the timing of it all, and knowing your brains, it wouldn't be difficult for you to figure out it was Cedric who wrote the letter; in fact, it wouldn't be difficult at all.

Your owl dropped the rolled up piece of paper onto your empty plate as it flew over your head.

Cedric had tied the paper together with a [favorite color] ribbon for more appeal, and so he could pin point that it was his letter you were opening.

He watched as your fingers delicately untied the ribbon. The letter unraveled and you began to read the heartfelt words pour out onto the paper:

"Dear [Name],

There are many things I would like to say to you, but there's only so much room on a piece of paper. That doesn't mean I didn't try though!

You are everything I have ever wanted and so much more.

Whether it's your smile or your sense of humor or your desire to please everyone around you; you have made me fall for you. And trust me when I say; I fell hard.

I didn't know what loving someone meant until I met you. I've had crushes in the past, but none of them have made me feel the way you do. You make me feel like I'm the greatest wizard in the world, and I will never be able to thank you enough for that.

I'm running out of paper, so l'll make this quick:

I love you.

Always yours..

Your eyes lifted off the paper and flickered to where Cedric sat. It was a quick glance, but it made Cedric's heart race in an emotion between hopefulness and nervousness he couldn't quite discern.

Cho's squeals rang in your ears as your mind raced. Of course you knew it was Cedric who had written the letter. The timing couldn't have been a coincidence, yet that feeling of refusal that usually swept through you when Cedric made his advances wasn't there this time. It shocked you, but you couldn't ignore the blossoming feeling in your heart.

You were falling for Cedric Diggory.

Your eyes flickered back to where the boy sat at the Hufflepuff table. Cedric was gazing at you with that look in his eyes he usually held when he confessed his feelings for you, and you couldn't help the soft, tight lipped smile that stretched across your face at the sight.

If this meant what you thought it did than you were more than enthusiastic for what was to come.

╰┈➤

Game day was always nerve-wracking for Cedric. The whole of Hufflepuff depended on him to make them proud, but today only one person's opinion mattered to him; yours.

The second movie you had given him was 10 Things I Hate About You, and now it was time for him to recreate the iconic scene you said you loved.

The mic shook in his hand as he waltzed out onto the stands. Everyone was there with rumors spreading about Cedric doing something special, and Cho had guaranteed you were there too. With a shaky breath, Cedric walked out onto the stadium as the steady instrumental of 'Can't Take My Eyes Off of You' began to play.

He closed his eyes as the words of the song poured out of his mouth. Cedric was by no means a good singer, but if this is what it took to get you in his arms, he would sing for the rest of his life. Cheers followed his movements as he pointed at where you sat. You were covering your face with your hand, but your eyes were crinkled in joy.

The words flowed out easier as Cedric's eyes stayed focused on you instead of the hoard of students watching him. His movements became more relaxed as he danced around on the stadium's seats before sitting among the crowds as the chorus came to an end. Cheers drowned out the stadium hurting both your and Cedric's ears. Cho pushed your hand away from your face revealing the big toothy grin that had taken over the lower half of your face. It was the happiest Cedric had ever seen you before and he mirrored your smile.

Teachers were rushing toward where Cedric sat amongst the crowd, but he could've cared less for the scowls on their faces and the strides they took toward him. Stage 2 was a success, and Cedric couldn't help the tsunami of hope washing over him that after stage 3, you would finally be his boyfriend after all these years of trying.

Unbeknownst to Cedric, his hope wasn't too far off. The letters he had been sending you since that day in the great hall sat under your bed in a beautifully decorated box you had made specifically for them, and your face held a certain warmth as you watched the teachers pull the boy by his arms away from the crowd.

You were in love with Cedric Diggory.

╰┈➤

The wind blew in your hair as you stood in the middle of the green, newly-cut grass field behind Hogwarts. In the letter you had been given today from a certain Hufflepuff boy, a riddle had directed you to where you now stood. Suspicions of what could be going on had racked your brain since you received today's letter from Cedric. The third movie you had given Cedric was Flipped, and if he continued his current pattern, he would be planting a tree right here for you.

Your fingers twitched against your leg as you searched the area for Cedric. You considered yourself a patient person, but at the moment, all the patience you once had was gone.

To your relief, Cedric was walking toward you; his fist clenched by his side. A seed rested in his palm. He had taken the proper precautions for planting the seed earlier before your letter was delivered, and now was the time.

The sound of footsteps coming toward you caused you to turn around. Cedric walked toward you as you waved at him with a dorky smile, "Hi."

"Hi." Cedric cleared his throat awkwardly, catching your attention, "| guess you already know why I'm here, but, uh, here I am anyways.

And I'm sure you already know what is going on His voice shook as he continued, "I have loved you since the moment I saw you, and I know you wouldn't let me show it, but I couldn't let that stop me. I know that in the past you've rejected me and you might now, but I need to do this."

You nodded as Cedric opened his fist to reveal the dark, small seed that rested against his palm, "| want to be with you. I want to keep writing love letters to you, and doing embarrassing things just to make you smile even if it means I get detention. If- if you'd like that, please take this seed."

Your eyes fell onto the seed as your hand reached out to take it, “I'd like that. I'd like that a a lot actually.” You took the seed out of his hand; examining it, "I must say, Diggory, you really know how to win a guy's heart."

Cedric laughed as he took you in his arms relief taking over him, "I learned from the best."

"True." you added with a small giggle, "I do want my movies back though."

"No way." Cedric joked as he shook his head, "| like them too much now to give them back."

"Don't press your luck, Diggory. l've rejected you before, and I can reject you again" You playfully glared at the boy who was just grinning at you as giddy as ever, "Okay! Fine! We can share."

Cedric smiled against the top of your head as daydreams of laying with you took over his mind while the two of you watched one of your many rom coms.

"We really should plant this tree now." you whispered.

"Yeah, we should"

The two of you separated away from the hug as you bent down to the freshly dug hole in the ground. Cedric's hand cupped yours as you placed the seed into the hole, his fingers interlocking with yours, "I love you"

"I love you too."

Cedric couldn't help but kiss you like he had dreamed of doing all these years. It was as heavenly as he had imagined, and couldn't help but thank the movies that had helped him win you over and into his arms.

✎ notes . . . yes, this is a repost. tumblr deleted my old acc >:( （ 𖦹◞◟） 👖˖ ♪

©️ sethcertified 2023

[pstelwitchcraft]

My personal takes for each of the Nevermore characters

Lenore Vandernacht

Gets bitches

Mad Dad Energy

So Gender she made you fluid

If adhd was a Poe themed lesbian

Would prob swindle people out of a LOT of money as a banker or smth with her charm alone

but her real vocation is as Annabel's trophy wife

Too much rizz for her own good

Number #1 the most loyal and protective ever, will murder and pillage and die for the ones she loves

Literally Died and still can't take a hint that her WIFE might like her back

Looks iron deficient, really isn't

Annabel Lee Whitlock

Actually has no idea wtf she's doing

Possessive Bitch to an extreme (would prob sow herself to the ends of Lenore's gay little victorian blazer if she could)

If anxiety/depression was a person AND a villain origin story

Untrustworthy but in a Sexy Way

Doesn't know how to Humanly Interact

Would make a BANGER of a politician or lawyer (still deciding if for good or evil 🤔)

Genuinely Absolutely needs professional help but fuck it we ball

Is taking this whole thing somehow more and less seriously than everybody else

Craves and Yearns and Aches to be cared for and loved but will admit it over her cold thrice-dead body

Doesn't look iron deficient, totally is

Duke

There's a 50/50 chance he's not actually French and just fucking with everybody

Can't grow a beard

The real reason he doesn't like Annabel is that he absolutely despises the British

Illusionist by trade, jackass by passion

Loves cheese to an ungodly degree

Ada

Worries everybody around her

Literally Died and still on her bullshit

Can't spot a red flag to save her life (ironic bc it's prob how she died)

Will Not Stop Talking

Pluto

Teddy Bear in spirit/cat in body/Tortoise at heart

Has either all the chill or never had a chill ever

Needs a booster seat to eat at restaurants

Hates dogs

Cannot survive without his friends

Really selective eater

Morella

Can be swiftly and effectively peer-pressured into anything

Got mad once. Still feels bad about it

Feels actual, physical pain at the idea of not being liked

Asks people if they have pets before asking for their name

Consumes a preposterous ammount of sugar

Eulalie

Will sage u if ur vibes aren't right

Got kicked out of a paranormal investigation team for asking the ghosts weird questions

Actually the only one who prob knows what's up

But has decided to just let it play out for funsies

Has correctly diagnosed everyone behind their backs

Berenice

#cuntsagainstthepatriarchy

Misses alcohol the most since her death

Will bite men for looking in her direction 😌

Always there to defend a fellow woman tho

Has the vibes of a pinball machine

Actually genuinely a caring and loving person

Prospero

Done with everybody's bullshit

Superiority complex to an EXTREME

His whole closet is organized by color, season and year of making

Just trying to get through one fucking book this whole time

Has incorrectly diagnosed everyone behind their backs

Held a puppy once. Didn't like it

[sdv-confessions]

Person with clinical depression here, the fact people expect Shane to just magically get better and give up alcohol shows a huge level of ignorance about the topic of both depression and addiction.

Just because someone rizzes you up or becomes besties with you doesn’t make the depression go away. I still have moments of being unmotivated to do anything despite having a good friend group. It still sticks with you no matter how much support you get especially if it’s chronic.

And to expect him to give up to booze after being rizzed by the farmer is just dumb. That’s literally not how addictions work if it’s a result of a cooping mechanism. A person who self harms isn’t magically going to stop self harming just because they’re dating somebody. That’s not how it works.

.

[star-dust-shark]

pjo incorrect quotes as things me and people I know have said on crack

Jason: these grapes are funky

Leo: these grapes are fucky

Leo: *drops sandwich, cries*

-

Nico: I will never forget the fact that Piper and I where sitting together with headphones on and she looked up only to see me playing air guitar and head banging to whats my age again

-

Solangelo: *kith*

Will: *walking away with a dorky grin*

Will: *almost gets hit by car*

Will: *gets home and screams into pillow for twenty minutes, then picks up diary and writes like five pages about Nico, then texts him for like an hour and a half and afterwards draydreams about him*

Will: hmm I think I might like Nico

-

Leo: imagine having sex and someone moans like a hentai girl lol

Percy: *moans* KyAAaaaAAHHHhhhhhh

-

Reyna: bro apologized like Colleen Ballinger

Reyna: like fuck off I hope you die

Percy: tOxiC GosSiP tRaiN

Jason: not a groomer

Leo: *hair flip* just a loser

-

Piper: Im horny- I mean horngry- I mean- *cries*

-

Nico: mentally I am a fifty year old man

Will: yeah totally not obvious mister motley crue

-

Leo: jason

Leo: I have something to tell you

Jason: yeah?

Leo: Im gay

Jason: WHAT

Jason: NO WAY THATS CRAZY

-

Annabeth: my wrist hurts

Percy: emooooooooooo

Annabeth: I literally sprained it wtf

-

Hazel: no you cant commit mass genocide Nico

Nico: its pride month this is homophobic

-

Reyna: okay how about we play the quiet game

Reyna: whoever wins gets my two dollars

Reyna: three, two, one, ghost town

Frank:

Leo:

Percy:

Annabeth:

Jason:

Nico:

Leo: *face red, fists clenched, rocking back and forth*

Everyone: *concerned looks*

Leo: I cant- IM A BITCH IM A BOSS IM A BITCH AND A BOSS AND I SHINE LIKE GLOSS

-

Piper: your moms hot

Jason: lol what she ugly asf

-

Will: im concerned with your eating habits, Nico

Nico:

Will: its very serious Im kinda scared

Nico:

Nico: womp womp

-

Jason: would you suck my dick if-

Percy: yes

Jason:

Jason: if there was poison in it and I would die if you didnt

-

Leo: ive learnt something interesting

Leo: my arm skin one day may be cut off and turned into a penis

Leo: therefore...

Leo: *bumps arm into Jason*

Leo: JESUS JASON STOP TOUCHING MY PENIS

Jason: WHAT

-

*talking on tumblr*

Hazel: wyd

Frank: jus on tumblr and talking to you

Hazel: lol nerd imagine

-

Hazel: *bats eyelashes* what does gyat mean

Frank: uhh It means generous young amazing t-

Leo: GORL YA ASS THEEK

-

Rachel: Im so single

Will: skill issue? L ratio? no rizz? no game? no bitches?

-

Percy: I havent taken my meds

Annabeth: oh no good gods

Percy: so that means

Percy: I will either try to kill myself orrrrr

Percy: like violently fuck someone

Jason: I volunteer

Jason: I volunteer as tribute

-

Nico: hey girl *winks* r u a racoon

Nico: bc Im trash

Nico: *bursts into tears*

-

Annabeth: *walks into bathroom, sees spider*

Annabeth: *yelps* oh

Annabeth: hello mister spider

Annabeth: youre not so bad

Spider: *moves*

Annabeth: FUCK NAH PERCY WERE MOVING PACK YO BAGS

-

Jason: *hits knee* oh fuck- my knee-

Leo: okay

Jason: *scared* ur gonna fuck my knee????

-

Thalia: I am now a tree a tree I am a tree is me

-

Nico: im actually kinda insecure about my knees weirdly enough

Will: aww bb :(

Will: well I think you uh

Will: ...have beautiful knees???

-

Nico: *jokingly* I can read your mind

Will: oh no

Will: oh shit

Will: thats not good

Nico: it cant be that bad

Will:

Nico: are these thoughts about me, per chance?

Will: WHAAAAT NOOO *hangs up*

-

Leo: daddy hands, twig nerd bod

-

Leo: im confused why can girls call their friends girlfriends but whenever I call Jason my boytoy twink malewife manwhore someone gets pissed

-

Hazel: yeah, this guys really annoying me

Frank: ugh im gonna fist him

Hazel: ...

Frank: what

Frank: like beat him up?

Hazel:

-

Percy: my friend thinks youre cute

Annabeth: what? who?

Percy: me

Percy: Im the friend

Percy: I think ur cute

-

Nico: so weird when someone comforts you

Nico: like why

Nico: just lemme be a moody emo brooding sad angsty depressed boy for a bit

-

Piper:

Leo:

Piper:

Leo:

Piper:

Leo: *in toad voice* BItCH i SaiD wHaT i sAiD iD rAthEr bE FaMoUs InsTeAd iD LeT aLL Of ThAt GeT To MY heAd I DonT cArE ILL pAinT tHe ToWn ReD

-

Nico: *crafting with scissors*

Percy: *walks in*

Percy: what are you doing

Nico: ...crafting?

Percy: oh okay I thought you where cutting yourself

Nico:

Nico: IM MAKING A HELLO KITTY ART PIECE

-

Leo: *glares*

Frank: *glares back*

Frank and Leo: *glaring at eachother*

Leo: omg I just felt sparks

Frank: DUDE STFU WTF

-

*sees gay porn*

Will: thats it im homophobic

-

Nico: so I wrote this song

Nico: *adjusts mic, positions guitar*

Nico: *deep breath*

Nico: *strums single chord* my whole family died

Nico: thank you, thank you

-

Nico: just realized the only physical contact Ive had in like a whole month was Leo dabbing me up

-

Jason: straights ask why theres no straight pride month but like

Jason: isnt there a toyota month or smth

Jason: id say that works

[whyse7vn]

RIZZLESS -

[ot7 x reader]

HOSEOK -

hobi: on a scale of one to pregnant how much do you love me

y/n: abortion

hobi: ok then

y/n: u were in my dream last night

hobi: was my fit hard?

y/n: you was cheating

hobi: real

y/n: ???

hobi: ??

anyways let’s fuck i’m so fr rn

y/n: kiss me through the phone

hobi: ft me 😍

y/n: ew no

you really think i’m gonna have esex with u rn???

hobi: ok the term esex is a REAL turn off

also why not

u not fucking with my rizz?

y/n: what rizz?

hobi: i would fight a lion for you

y/n: is that it?

hobi: is that it????

why are you acting like the lion line didn’t get you going back in the day

y/n: back in the day?? are we 65?

hobi: ur acting 65

y/n: sorry i don’t want to have phone sex

leave me alone

hobi: do you not love me

y/n: not rn no

hobi: look into my eyes baby

y/n: stop harassing me

hobi: is my game really that bad?

y/n: i’m afraid so

hobi: don’t be afraid

hoseokies got u

y/n: hoseokie?? i have never called you that in my life

hobi: ok well maybe you should start

y/n: i won’t

hobi: mannnnn :(

i’ll even call you something cute in return

what about hunnybun 💞

y/n: i’m gonna kill myself and it’s gonna be ur fault

hobi: WAIT!!!!

let me fuck first

y/n: ur insufferable

hobi: i love a woman with a big vocabulary

like yesss tell me i’m gargantuan while we fucking

y/n: ur so fucking gross

how am i with you

hobi: we are in deep deep love

y/n: i’m in a deep deep depression

hobi: that mean u freaky right?

y/n: can you leave me alone now

hobi: i love and miss you

y/n: i can tell

hobi: can you not just say you love and miss me back like wow ur so difficult why do i put up with this

y/n: we are in deep deep love!!!

hobi: u a super freak 😍⁉️

y/n: zero fucking rizz

JUNGKOOK -

jungkook: are you an apple?

y/n: no?

jungkook: because apple pie

y/n: ?

jungkook: 👍🏻

y/n: i’m lost

jungkook: so am i

y/n: are you trying to flirt with me?

jungkook: i’m sorry

pls don’t hit me

y/n: your making it real hard not to rn

jungkook: do you have the time?

y/n: no

jungkook: 4:30 pm 😉

y/n: that makes zero sense

jungkook: i have more

please baby

y/n: no

jungkook: you must be a waterfall

y/n: i am not

jungkook: wet

y/n: ew

jungkook: don’t slip

y/n: leave me alone

jungkook: do you like it

y/n: what do you think

jungkook: a little

y/n: no

jungkook: oh

y/n: yeah

jungkook: i’m so sorry

y/n: i know

jungkook: 🥹

y/n: if i could i would punch you rn

jungkook: out of love and appreciation?

y/n: i haven’t decided yet

jungkook: i get that

y/n: do you?

jungkook: 😞……

y/n: you make my brain hurt so bad

but i have to kiss you on the mouth passionately

jungkook: kiss

y/n: ur so annoying

UGH

real himbo u are

jungkook: haribo?

y/n: what?

jungkook: no

y/n: what?????

jungkook: are you butter?

y/n: ?

jungkook: smooth like 😍

y/n: are you drunk?

jungkook: no

y/n: are you sure?

jungkook: are you sure yes

y/n: what the actual fuck are you saying to me rn

jungkook: i’m trying to appear more intelligent

y/n: it is not working!

jungkook: have you liked my pickup lines so far

y/n: i wonder what it is like in your brain

truly

jungkook: me 2

y/n: what did you actually want from me kookie

jungkook: do you think i’m good at pickup lines?

y/n: lol!

TAEHYUNG -

taehyung: BRO JIMIN KEEPS SAYING I HAVE NO RIZZ LIKE HOW DOES HE THINK I PULLED YOU IS HE STUPID???????

y/n: you just called me bro?

taehyung:

my fault my amazing sunshine queen nugget honey muffin pie baked at 180 degrees for 25 minutes made with love sprinkles happiness and joy

y/n: jimin is right

taehyung: my rizz was just so out of this world good it made you think it was bad

y/n: if being delusional was a olympic sport you would have like 15 hundred gold medals by now

taehyung: that’s impossible actually

y/n: tHaTs iMpOsSiBlE aCtuALlY 🤓☝🏽

taehyung: u think ur funny

y/n: hilarious actually

taehyung: i would stab myself for you

y/n: boring

jimin would definitely die for me

taehyung: ok?? who said i wasn’t dying like god you can never let me finish

y/n: ok but jimin would of opened with i would die for you

taehyung: jimin clearly isn’t a vivid story teller like i am

i would of broken down the whole getting stabbed and dying for you storyline if you’d fucking let me

y/n: i like a man that gets straight to the point

taehyung: i love you

y/n: jimin would of kissed me

taehyung: i’m trying to flirt with u right now and ur being difficult

y/n: jimin would of done this better sighs

taehyung: i could outrizz jimin any day

y/n: outrizz? that sounds like something a 12 year old would say

taehyung: maybe i am 12

y/n: ew?

don’t say that

taehyung: do you think we would fall in love if we met when we were 12?

y/n: probably those were ur normal days

idk what happened to you after that

u really let urself go

taehyung: i ate an ant for the first time when i was 12

y/n: nvm

for the first time????

and the last i hope

taehyung: i be getting hungry sometimes

y/n: imagine how insane your fans would think you are if they saw even a day’s worth of the shit you say to me

taehyung: insanely sexy like you see me right lol 😩

y/n: fuck you

taehyung: go ahead then

fuck me

ain’t nobody holding you back

yehaw

y/n: yehaw?

taehyung: sorry the cowboy in me likes to come out sometimes

did he make you blush

y/n: seek help i’m not joking

JIMIN -

jimin: whenever i get a message from you i moan a little bit

i hope it’s the same for you

do you moan for me babe

i bet you do

u freak

yeah

i like that

y/n: wow

jimin: why are you cheating on me

y/n: ?????

where is this coming from

and how did you go from moaning at my notifications to accusing me of cheating?

jimin: so many questions not enough answers

answer me pretty

y/n: are you trying to fuck me or fight me right now

like what is going on?

jimin: you held namjoons hand yesterday

y/n: he literally fell on the floor

i helped him up

jimin: ok so?

he’s a grown man

he can get up by himself

y/n: he twisted his ankle

so no he couldn’t get up by himself

jimin: ok but a real man would of walked it off

y/n: idk what to tell u then

namjoon must have a pussy? idk

jimin: ur into that tho

u freak

y/n: what?????

jimin: i’m like real drunk rn

y/n: jimin what the hell its 11:30 in the morning???

jimin: ok?? the henny was calling me

y/n: this is real concerning baby

jimin: baby huh?

y/n: where are you rn

jimin: filming

y/n: ur filming this fucked up? be fr

jimin: ok but did you believe me for a second

y/n: not one

jimin: aw man :(

rate my back flip

y/n: what

jimin: i just did it can you rate it pls

y/n: 4/10?

jimin: wtf

you clearly don’t know anything about the art of flipping 💀

y/n: k

jimin: my backflip was majestic

y/n: i can bet you like 20k rn that you did not flip at all

jimin: looks like i’m 20k up

y/n: don’t lie to me

jimin: i’m a good liar

y/n: definitely not!

jimin: do you want to make out

y/n: no

jimin: ur loss

y/n: i’ll cope

jimin: you won’t I’m telling you baby

y/n: i’m coping

jimin: ur not i can see it in your eyes

y/n: you can’t even see me rn

jimin: i see you in my heart

y/n: thanks

jimin: yw

i’m gonna throw up now

y/n: ew

drink some water please

jimin: let me spit game rq

y/n: ok?

jimin: eye🤤

y/n: LMAOSOS WHAT???

jimin: do i have game?

y/n: absolutely not but i love the effort!

jimin: i want you so bad

be mindful 🤭

y/n: mindful?

jimin: minecraft

mini

mother

maybe

mauwjc

movement

mw

meow

mmmmm

motel

mountain

y/n: this is real sad

it’s not even 12 yet

alcoholism kills

jimin: mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

y/n: you’ll get it i believe in you

NAMJOON -

namjoon: sent you money baby

y/n: ew why

namjoom: felt like it

y/n: gonna use it for evil

namjoon: what?

y/n: evil tasks

namjoon: ok be safe love 👍🏻❤️

y/n: love ur silly emojis sighs

namjoon: rizz

y/n: rizz?

namjoon: rizz

y/n: LMAO WHAT

namjoon: rizz

i just rizzed rn

y/n: EW THAT SOUNDS SO GROSS

tf you mean you just rizzed

namjoon: i have rizz

y/n: who taught you that what the hell

namjoon: i learnt it myself this time

i have rizz

am i saying this right

i think i am

rizz

you’ve been rizzed

anyways love you bye ❤️

rizz

y/n: HELPSJDJDJXJ

DON’T GO JOONIE

come back

namjoon: i am back

y/n: i would LOVE to see more of this so called “rizz” you have

namjoon: oh ok

❤️

rizz

y/n: LAMSKOSOSODODODJDJDN

is it necessary to say rizz every time?

namjoon: i think so

idk if i’m doing this right

i hope i am

it feels right

y/n: ur hearts in the right place and that’s all that matters tbh

namjoon: i’m glad

also i booked dinner for us later

major rizz 😆

y/n: UR SO SILLY

ohmygod i love you i do

namjoon: you like my rizz?

y/n: love it

namjoon: thanks cuz idk what i’m actually talking about

y/n: i can tell

namjoon: rizz is like game right?

i have game i’m a good flirt it means that right?

y/n: basically

namjoon: so is it tue?

do i have major unspoken rizz?

y/n: ew never say that again

it was cute until it wasn’t

namjoon: aw wtf :/

was i doing good?

y/n: great actually

major unspoken rizz was ur downfall

namjoon: mannnnn

i’ll never say that again

as long as i live

y/n: i’m glad

namjoon: was it a major ick? a red flag perhaps???

y/n: stop talking

SEOKJIN -

jin: ur so quiet downstairs

y/n: you want me to start beatboxing or something??

jin: would you 🥺

y/n: bye

jin: can you please come lay with me im bored

y/n: in a bit

jin: boo

y/n: i’m studying

jin: for what?

y/n: what do you want

jin: you 😋

y/n: wait

jin: woof

y/n: ??

jin: sorry you since you wanna talk to me like a dog i thought i’ll act like one

y/n: you are not trying to argue with me rn…

jin: and if i am 😚?

y/n: or worst is this ur fucked up way of flirting with me…..

jin: wow you know me so well ^^

you know i love u most when ur a little bit mad at me >.<

i’m a empath

y/n: that is not what that means

jin: ok so what

y/n: it means ur stupid

jin: you want me so bad

y/n: idk who told you that

jin: the voices

y/n: woah?

jin: do i scare you?

people say i’m a freak…

they laugh

they giggle

but ur different

you see…

me

y/n: tf are you going on about??

laugh and giggle basically the same thing ur dumb as hell x2

ur pissing me off bye

jin: BABE COME BACK

let me seduce you

y/n: lmk when the seduction starts cuz i’m not feeling what ever tf this is

jin: ok it started the moment i said woof but i get it ur a picky lady

u have standards

i respect that

hold my hand

look at me

i love you

i NEED you

y/n: fuck off kim seokjin

jin: ok tough crowd tonight lmao

ok my egos not hurt at all

in fact it’s gotten a little larger

y/n: whatever

jin: lol

y/n: ??

jin: i think being with you has made me lose my natural charm

i swear i can flirt

y/n: who told u that

that’s crazy

jin: i CAN flirt

y/n: sure

jin: like i’m really god at it

y/n: yeah!

jin: ur being sarcastic

y/n: am i?

jin: i’ll punch you

y/n: that’s not how you flirt now silly!!!!

jin: you are becoming my downfall in life

next ur gonna take my extremely good looks away from me

y/n: you got me!

jin: bitch

y/n: i don’t think i’ll come upstairs actually

jin: was my charm not good enough?

y/n: take a guess

YOONGI -

yoongi: ur eyes shine

y/n: ok

yoongi: ur hair is shiny

y/n: thanks

yoongi: ur teeth shine

y/n: ok?

yoongi: i can’t do this omg

y/n: tf was that

yoongi: i think my rizz is better when it’s unspoken

y/n: i agree cuz ur telling me THAT was rizz???

wow u suck lol

yoongi: sorry wtf

i would like to see you do better

y/n: i’ll impregnate you rn lol 😋

yoongi: yeah you can’t flirt for shit

y/n: wtf that was one of my best lines

yoongi: that almost made me do a line of coke

y/n: h-hi i k-kinda like you okay >\\\<

yoongi: ok stop

y/n: let me cook bae

yoongi: absolutely not

y/n:

shhhhhh

come here kitten

yoongi: i’m gonna throw up

y/n: you should be like that one mark lee video rn

“ur making me blush”

if i was you and you were me and you as me said that to me as you ik i (as you) would be blushing like CRAZY

yoongi: sucks ur not me and i’m not you then

y/n: it does

how i would kill for someone to say that to me…

sighsssssss

yoongi: absolutely not

ur out of ur mind

y/n: yoongiiiiiiiii

ur no fun

pleaseeeeeeeee :3

look i did ur silly face

pls oh pls oh pleaseeeeeee

:3

:3

:3

yoongi: i’m gonna block you

y/n: just one come here kitten and i’ll never ever message you again

yoongi: ur out of ur mind

y/n: for you 😍

yoongi: no

y/n: :c

yoongi: stop

y/n: :c

:c

:c

yoongi: i’m not doing it

y/n: ㅠㅠ

that’s me crying rn

as we speak

yoongi: bye

y/n: you will say it

yoongi: why do you have so many pictures of this man

y/n: why are you jealous??

dw you know ur my one and only bbg

wow my rizz out of this world

you can no longer send messages to this contact!

—

tags: @piw6n @jvmisvu @birdie-vhs @kooksmilitarywife @hob3loveofmylife @jujubiism @bloopkook @ratchetpizzal @myntalks @arloo00 @watamotee33 @y2kcy3brz @taiwan0618 @indigobsessed @freyadanvers @gguksbeloved @raetf @bbsantc @winuvs @medicinemybish @bxnnyhime @leleluvsbts @baetukki @zyaaaszn @thelilbutifulthings @yojaschill @k4ngelz

[crabonfire]

mercs with reader who has poetic rizz 🫶

characters: all mercs

warnings: corny poetry / letters

note: I'm writing this because I write very badly written poetry myself and I just wanted to share 👍👍👍 this is very random haha

reader is shy abt their writing and gets embarrassed showing or talking abt it (that's how I react when I show people my corny poetry agahwhsg) all the poems have dumb names

♡Scout♡

• he doesn't understand what the fuck any of it means but it sure sounds smart and sophisticated.

• he would be messing around in your notebook and finding very well written lines of romantic and depressing poetry, finds it actually very attractive?? he has a thing for "smart people" stuff.

• he found a love poem you made, went along the lines of:

The day we ultimately leave this plane of existence, If in a time of judgement, I'd get to have live again. I'd search every corner of this vast, timeless universe just to see you again.

• and when he saw the note at the end that said "for my love" He felt like combusting on the spot.

• when he brings it up he's like "You wrote this for me?" And if you get all shy and stuff he's honestly gonna kiss you so hard. If your nervous about your writing he's the best hypeman 🫶🫶

• brags about it to the others but never shows them any poems you have, wants to keep them to himself <33 definitely has written copies of your poems in his room.

♡Pyro♡

• hubba hubba

• bro is honestly so honored my god

• he'd be snooping around in your room because he was looking for you and find pieces of paper on your desk, filled with romantic letters. Some have been scribbled over, probably some you didn't like. One reads,

Even in the sheer and agonising cold, I can still feel the fire in my fingertips when I'm with you.

You're my source of warmth in the winter, my light at the end of the tunnel, my everything.

I'd go through a hundred battles if I knew you'd be the one I protect.

• and when he reads, "for my firefly."

• you got em blushing under the mask fr,, bro is kicking his feet in the air, punching the wall, shaking the paper like a crazed fangirl...dawggg

• when he finds you, he will literally shake you around like a pinata, shoving the paper in your face and practically asking "is this about me"

• when you smile and nod in response, you get a squeal out of him, hugging you tightly and giggling uncontrollably as he...purrs??? on you?? rizz so poetic you turned bro into a cat...wtf

• will show engie and beg you if he can see more poetry. Will attempt to do it for you because he wants to impress you 🫶

♡Soldier♡

• you were writing on your notebook for a while in the common room while everybody was up to their own thing, and he was quite curious on what you were doing.

He asked but you were too embarrassed to say what it was, he caught on and took a peek from the side, making you look away and frown, a blush forming at your face.

You're like no man I've ever met, a stern and determined figure that manages to surpass expectation.

What I'd do to kiss you, I'd cross the lands far wide just for a chance to gaze upon your beautiful face.

You have such a fire in your eyes when you set your mind to something. Those baby blues have me in a chokehold, I wonder what fire will arise when you look at me.

I'd do anything, anything at all if it meant I'd be the one to start that flame.

• "...WHO IS THIS FOR?"

You pause for a bit and sigh, "You."

He takes a second, reading everything back again he feels his face start to heat up tremendously. His knees feel weak, head is dizzy, and he has the stupidest smile on his face.

• he grabs you by the shoulders, making you stand up as he aggressively kisses you, pulling back he says "EXCELLENT WORK. I AM HONORED TO BE WRITTEN ABOUT SO BEAUTIFULLY. THANK YOU CADET!"

• he walks away with the biggest fucking grin ever he might start fucking skipping.

You're just left there with a red face, stunned and confused on what to do.

♡Demo♡

• he likes to talk to you a lot, so this would probably pop up in a convo. you talk about arts, and you mention the fact you do poetry in your spare time.

He jokingly asks if you made any about him, fully expecting you to snort and shake your head. But when you go silent, looking away for a second he immediately feels like he's going to burst. You've written poetry about him?

He begs you for a good 15 minutes until you agree to show him, bringing it up even after you've changed the topic of conversation.

• He watches you pull out your notebook with excitement, he's already grinning even before you show him. You huff, handing him the book with a page that says "corny poem for demo I'm never showing him" and he laughs at that.

The poem goes,

My dear, words can not express the sheer adoration I have for you.

I was never fond of drinks myself, but if alcohol ever tasted like you, I'd have become a crazed drunkard whose only relief was alcohol.

Your lips are so soft. When they kiss my skin, it feels as though I have just been blessed by the heavens above.

• bro has his jaw dropped to the floor, face tinted a dark red as he literally has to blink to see if this was about HIM?

• he's laughing, shaking his head and covering his face in embarrassment.

"I cannae believe this. This...this is for me?"

You simply nod.

"Dear lord, yer an angel ya know that?" He leans in and kisses you, then kisses you some more all over your face, making you giggle, pulling you into his lap and having a full on make out session.

He'll kiss your neck and leave marks, whispering sweet compliments, repetitions of "thank you's," and "I love you's" over and over. If he fell head over heels for you, then now he's fell for real and dropping into a pit of neverending love for you <3

♡Heavy♡

• I'd say he found them on accident, he insisted on helping you clean your room when you got too tired to do it, and as he was reorganising your desk he found your notebook laid open, and curiously, he read the specific page.

The title was "hahsjfjfjdkskzncn"

The way your arms wrap around my waist makes it feel like it's just the two of us against this cruel world.

But even with my upsetting mindset, you manage to find a way to strip me of those thoughts, and every day, the colour in this world gets a little brighter.

I love your laugh, and when you do it, the angels sing to the gods. My heart always longs to be within your presence because it feels like I'm floating whenever I'm with you.

• he blushes, and blushes even more when he sees the note at the end written "for misha (I'll probably never show him this it's corny asl)" and he doesn't smile, he doesn't even show any form of expression, but his face is so red he could pass as a tomato.

He doesn't bring it up right away, but when he finishes cleaning your room, he talks to you about it with a flustered expression, voice low and quiet with cheeks dusted a rosy pink.

"I like the poem. It is quite lovely, thank you."

You just sorta sit there kind of embarrassed of your poem and nodding aggressively.

• he thinks of that poem a lot, and if he finds out you've made more for him he's actually gonna burst.

♡Engie♡

• finds out similarly with how Heavy and Pyro did!! He fell asleep in your room while you two were cuddling, and it happened to be a ceasefire day so yall had nothing to do. He's a real heavy sleeper so while you were showering he was still snoring loudly.

but then a couple minutes later after you did, he woke up.

• he rubbed his eyes and decided to get cups of coffee for the both of you. he placed the cups on your desk and noticed your notebook was open. Not so subtly, he started to read what was written.

"I love texans" was the title, he smirked at that.

The moon and the stars don't even compare to you, and the heat of the sun can't even be on the same level as how warm you make me feel.

I can't take it when you're away. It's like a part of my heart starts to shatter at your absence. The days feel like weeks, the longer you're away. I miss you even when you're just in the other room, I miss your voice even when we just started to talk.

Your words are so sweet to me, and it seems I've developed a sweet tooth just for you.

• 🙁🙁🙁🙁🙁😞😞😞😭😭😭😭

• bro felt like sobbing to be honest, smiling like a goof and screaming internally.

he will join you in the shower,trailing his fingers over your body and leaving feathery kisses over your back. you'd giggle, asking him what gotten him in such a mood. all he'll do is hum, washing your body as he continues kiss you in all sorts of places.

• like Scout, he finds it a weirdly attractive trait, like the romantic essence of it yk??

• the entire day he'll just be so much softer than usual, melting like a puddle around you when he randomly recalls the poem. Will definitely bring it up later, complimenting you and asking you about it.

( OK I ran out of ideas for romantic poems so I'm not writing them anymore SORRYYYYYYYY)

♡Medic♡

• You were high in anaesthesia after an operation, where he was fixing you up after a big battle. You two talked the night away, and you mentioned your hobbies when he was asking you, you blurt out your writing hobby and he seems very interested!

So in your fuzzy state, you pull your notebook outta yer ass and let him flip through the pages himself.

• he's quite surprised, very impressed at your writing abilities. Some of the poetry is sad, and he can truly resonate with some. Then, he sees one that catches his eyes, it's labelled "doctors!! ahhh!!"

he has a amused grin on his face, "is zhis one about me?" You chuckle, nodding aggressively like a drunk child.

• when he reads it, thay amused expression turns to one of embarrassment. It feels as though you've lifted him off of his feet, he knows it's rather corny, but it's so damn romantic he can't take it.

"woah!! your face is all red man, sorry for making you so flustered I just got that poetic rizz AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA-"

he shakes his head literally having no idea what that means and a weary smile forms on his face, not expecting the poem to be so specific.

But he reads it again, and again. Each repetition he melts even more at your endearing words about him. He can't help but feel overjoyed, his eyes soften when he meets your gaze.

He leans into the patient chair to give you a kiss on the forehead, gazing into your eyes and whispering, "Ich liebe dich, mein schatz. Danke, this is beautiful." He kisses you once more, on your nose this time making you giggle.

(I love doctors!! ahhh!!)

♡Sniper♡

• I don't think he'd be the type to uh, snoop around for your stuff, or even do anything remotely close without asking for it, so in terms of poetry he'd find you doing it like soldier did.

• you two were sitting under a tree near his van, a nice date in the woods for you both to get out of the chaos and just be alone.

• he rested his head on your shoulder, as you wrote intensely on your notebook. It was quiet, but it was a peaceful one.

"Hey, what'cha writin' there?"

You hum in reply, "Nothing."

"Really? Cause you've been writing for a bit now."

You just smile, continuing to write.

• After a bit you finish writing, and he takes a peek, "my star"

he smiled, it was about him. Well, he assumed.

Slowly, he read the lines of poetry that were just finished. You were reading it back, too. As he did, he couldn't help the heat that rose to his cheeks, and a downturned smile appeared on his face as he looked away, covering his face with his hat.

You noticed, looking at him and blushing as well.

"Oh. Did you.. read it?"

He paused, putting the hat back on his hat but still looking away. "Yea."

It was silent again, until he asked;

"...Is it about me?"

You smiled, "Well of course. Who else would it be about?"

His cheeks reddened even more, and then he went back to lean on your shoulder with a shy smile. One that you mirrored, tucking loose hair away from the sides of your face.

"It's cute."

"Thank you, its about you so of course it is."

He screamed internally at that. He just chuckled.

• Here you are, fully grown adult mercenaries, acting like little kids who are going on their first date. Those corny sentences you wrote will be stuck in his mind for weeks, months maybe...he's so in love with you man.

♡Spy♡

• he found out the same as soldier did, in the common room after everybody ate, you were sitting at a desk with a cup of coffee, writing something on your notebook. Truth be told, you had finished it, you were just contemplating if you wanted to show it to spy or not, you knew he'd love it, but a part of you knew it was also super corny.

"What are you writing, my dear?"

You screamed, shocked at his presence, slapping your hands on your notebook in an attempt to hide it.

"HUH?? WRITINF?? OH YEAHHHH just some uh, stuff. Yeah." You laugh nervously, a comically large bead of sweat streams from your face.

• he simply smirks, taking the book out of your hands and seeing what you're so embarrassed about. All you could do was sit, flushed face and eyebrows furrowed.

" 'poem, maybe I'll show him, i don't know.' This is for me, hm?"

You nod, covering your face with your hands and curling into a ball.

• he reads it, his expression is unclear, but he's intensely memorising the words you've written about him. It's so...romantic. He feels his cheeks heat up, and all he does is smile, eyes lidded full of admiration for what you've written.

"This is beautiful. I didn't know you were such a poet, why didn't you tell me?"

"..its embarrassing. It's not even that good, too. I just... do it when I'm bored."

He shakes his head, "Ma petite chou-fleur, you are a true artist. I am honoured to be written in such a way by such a lovely person such as yourself. You should not underestimate yourself, this is...wonderful."

He smiled at your adorable reaction. He kneels and takes your hand, giving it a kiss. "To know such kind hands think of me in such a way makes my head spin...for once, you've truly captivated me."

"And if it's alright, I would love to read more of your work. Poetry is truly difficult, yet you've managed to write so emotionally."

You can't believe what he says, but you can tell he's being genuine by his soft smile, one you rarely see. With your face still as red as a tomato, you nod, mirroring the smile he has.

• You two spend your time together in the common rooms talking about poetry, he's constantly complimenting you, and any person who walks by to see what your up to, he immediately starts to talk about your poetry, even going as far as to show it to them, telling them how good it is.

he's definitely asking for some pieces of your poetry, keeping it in a folder to read whenever he misses you.

done!!!

hide yo girls, the rizzler is here 💯💯💯🔥🔥🔥‼️‼️‼️

[jamisonwritestf2trash]

Random TF2 headcanons bc it has me in a chokehold.

These are set in 2023 bc I want to write these silly geese in present-day situations. (Still haven't gotten into the lore.)

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None of these fuckers like the same fastfood restaurants, they always disagree.

Heavy likes Jimmy Jon's.

Medic likes Subway, he thinks it's the healthier option (don't tell him the bread can legally be considered cake)

Scout likes Wendy's. Sniper pretends to like McDonald's just to mess with him. He really doesn't like fast food at all.

Demo likes Culver's

Spy hates fast food and has never eaten at places like that. He's too good for that (this is a lie. He frequently goes to Starbucks).

Soldier loves KFC with a passion.

Engie likes Popeyes.

Pyro doesn't eat. They guzzle pen ink and glitter glue.

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These old men can not use Gen Z slang to save their lives. However, Scout is horrendous with slang, He has called himself the rizzler. You will not go a day without him saying, "Take the L." This man is menace.

Medic used the word "Rizz" once and Scout almost threw up.

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Engineer loves Legos! He has every adult set. He's done the vespa, he's done the bonsai tree, and any others you can think of. He also buys the small kids sets for Pyro. They do it together for fun.

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Medic. Loves. To. Talk. Shit.

This man is loyal to no one. Show up to the lab with food and wine, and by the end of the night, you'll have dirt on anyone and everyone. Archimedes loves to listen in while he rants and raves.

————————————————————

Speaking of Medic, whoever headcannoned him as a guy who acts like a teenage girl was 100% correct. This man has a playlist for surgery that's all Kesha, MARINA, Gwen Stefani, and Britney Spears. This man has neon glitter pens and has a fuzzy pink diary (that's where he keeps everyone's secrets!). Man's says "teehee" and kicks his legs. He has a canopy bed and string lights in his room. (And I love him for it 🫶🏻)

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All of them are mentally ill in someway.

Heavy, Demo, and Engie have anxiety, but manage it well enough for it not to be a problem. (Demo just happens to manage with alcohol 😮‍💨)

Scout has ADHD and depression.

Sniper and Soldier have Autism

Spy has depression, and also body dysmorphia.

Medic has autismn, insomnia, and BPD

Pyro has schizophrenia and autism

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Sniper loves animals. Like, let's be for real animals are his hyperfixation. He has a special camera that can take pictures of animals from far away. He loves the fact that he can use his skills as a sniper to photograph animals.

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Spy can't recognize his own face unless he has his mask. His face seems to distort in the mirror after a few minutes. His mask keeps his features in place so it doesn't get a blurry and muddled.

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Demo knits! His mom taught him when he was younger. He has a blanket his mom started and he finished in his room.

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Might make more who knows :)

Love this game and the fandom sm rn.

[ultimate-spiderman-stuff]

A/N:sorry this it late I've just been in a bit of a depressive episode for the last wee while

I'm also doing the reader sort of like Black Cat

_________________________________

It all started when fury asked Peter to check out some suspicious activity down town in a rich couple's mansion

He went through a window looking around , then he saw you

You were walking away from a open vault, slightly laughing swinging a bag over your shoulder

'' Hey there!" He said cheerfully, trying to shoot a web at you

"Spider-Man, come down here and fight like a man!"

"How about you come up here and fight like a spider? "

"Ok, I will"

Now that caught him off guard

You lunged up onto the ceiling and swiped at him with you mechanical claws

After quite a while of fighting you managed to get away

Fury was pissed and made him spend his weekend training

Peter was not a happy spider

-------------------------------

When you see each other again he decides to follow you

Then he saw you go into a shady part of town

Almost everyone was out on the streets, trying to find shelter and everything was in bad shape

He followed you into an alley way and watched from the roof top

He was surprised when he saw you giving the money to a couple of people

Once they were gone he dropped down in front of you

"Aww, who knew you were such a softie" His mask lenses were narrowed into happy slits

"Bugger off" you rolled your eyes at him, walking away

He spotted a diamond necklace in your pocket

"Are you gonna give that back by any chance? "

"Nope" you said, popping the 'P'

Then you jumped up onto the roof, disappearing from sight

---------------------

The two of you kept doing the same thing, making light convocation

Nothing personal. Just random topics

Since Fury still wanted you captured you guys still fought

It was basically a game of cat and mouse

It was all fun and games till he slipped while fighting and face planted into your chest

The Bugle was having a field day

May saw on the news and was not impressed

The teams were teasing him nonstop

You were too

There was a lot of flirting

Well, mostly from you cos he has no rizz

But it's cute so dont fret

Soon the flirting turned into kissing

It happened when a reporter (probably MJ) asked if you guys were dating then before you two could answer she asked if you would do the Spider-Man kiss

For some reason you did it

The reporter snapped a pic then ran off

"Wanna do that again?"

[swatchlings-art]

hey so pharmister.. do you have any more content for that au? any headcanons? how the fuck does pharma end up with them bc? who's bright idea was it to throw him onto the idiot ship? ToT

and also how do they get together? do they get together?? the spinister rizz(tm) is too strong not to work /hj

OHOHOH I'M SO GLAD YOU ASKED!

So, for me pharmister is a ship that exists exclusively for my Pharma's redemption tour AU (which is my own take on a "Pharma lives after the Lost Light finale and now has to deal with the consequences of Everything")

AND MAN DO I HAVE CONTENT FOR THIS AU!!! I have... 72 pages of planning for it, and only 2 chapters fully written (out of 25 so far!) unfortunately most of it is all a WIP haha...

BUT get ready for me to babble AT LENGTH about it here lol

>how the fuck does Pharma end with the scavengers?

In my AU, Pharma wakes up from being braindead a few years after the finale and then gets a proper trial for his crimes, but instead of being sent to death row he's given the opportunity to Reintegrate Into Society after doing what's basically community service. He loses his medical license for obvious reasons, so he gets sent to do his service with The Peace Corps (which... are the Scavengers after being given a purpose in this New Cybertron).

>Who's bright idea was to throw him onto the idiot ship?

this is actually one of my favorite details for my au lol SO the only reason Pharma gets this second chance at life is because Minimus, in honor of Megatron, has formed a Restorative Justice Program for war criminals on both sides of the war. And part of that program is doing this type of Community Service instead of getting the death penalty or infinite prison time. His program is controversial among the populace and very new and experimental, but he's trying his best to make it work. He selected the Peace Corps for Pharma because the Scavengers are actually a glowing example that his program works so far and he thought putting him under their care would help Pharma have an easier time adapting to his new life (wildly unaware that it'd be psychological torture to surround Pharma with decepticons he loathes).

AS FOR HOW PHARMISTER WORKS HERE!!!

>Any headcanons? how do they get together? DO they get together?

yes I have SO many headcanons. The most important of them all is that Spinister saw Pharma for the first time and went "Wow, he's hot!" and only continued to be down bad for him from there (at first having an extremely shallow crush on the former medic, until [Plot Point] happens and he forms Genuine Tender Feelings for him).

Pharma as he exists in my AU is going through a full blown depression, and is having a really hard time accepting that he'll never be a medic ever again, and also he's paranoid as HELL thinking everyone and anything is out to get him. Ah, the wonders of trauma!

And it takes a bit of development for him to start trusting any of the scavengers at all, but the one that is easier to trust is Spinister. Mostly because he's completely honest about everything he has an opinion on. He's extremely blunt! The type of guy that blurts the first thought that forms in his processor without thinking about it first! He's too dumb to make a convincing lie or keep up a charade!

And also, Spinister's very obvious crush on Pharma is oddly reassuring and annoying for him at the same time. He has complicated feelings about being loved as he is! He hates it! But Spinister is just happy to be around Pharma because he likes him without judgements. Spinister has decepticon standards when it comes to love! Whatever fucked up things Pharma has done are Tame for him, hell, he also harvested organs at some point (It's like they're meant to be ♡ <- this comment would get him slapped).

I feel like fully revealing my hand as to if and how they get together would be spoiling that part of my AU. but what the hell!!! I don't get many opportunities to talk about it.

Anyway YES they get together but at first Pharma uses him to try and fill the void inside him (Spinister is more than happy to go along with it), and only later on does Pharma start to appreciate and become deeply fond of Spinister (because if anything, he CAN trust him to be on his side and he even starts to admire that Spinister is just... very at peace with himself despite his perceived flaws. That's enviable somehow).

ANYWAY!

Hope that was a satisfying answer to your question!!! I cannot fully express how grateful I am that someone else wants to know more about my AU and my beloved crackship I accidentally created ♡♡♡ so thanks for asking!