#who else my mind is blank
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"you all make all monotone characters aroace" is so fucking stupid. the reason so many "monotone" characters get this headcanon is because of their lack of interest in sex and or romance, not because they act cold or indifferent to other people.
maybe if the media showed us more bubbly happy go lucky characters, or whatever, with these lack of interests, then we wouldn't have to be dealing with this. maybe that's just going to keep happening until we are finally accepted and understood better in media.
it's not about personality. we don't get to choose the outright nature/personality/physical appearance of the aro/ace coded characters we come across. it's about whether or not we see our ace/aro selves in these characters. it's about whether or not this character is showing signs of sexual attraction or lack thereof, or signs of romantic attraction or lack thereof.
don't forget, so many of these characters are guarded from trauma (and are not actually monotone or two-dimensional) and we don't get to see them open up because the people who write them don't always know how to make them happy without bringing a love interest into the plot.
AND YEAH, aro/ace people are guarded in real life too because we are constantly being told that we're not real, that our identity isn't valid, or that we're rude and heartless and the bad kind of weird and annoying and childish and that we don't know what we're talking about. we get told our opinions don't matter. we get harassed. we get forced on blind dates. we get told we need to be raped. we are told our lives are sad/depressing. we are bombarded with heteronormativity and amatonormativity every waking moment. we're told we're going to die alone and that we're not as important because we're not desirable in the same way others are. the list goes on and on and on.
we are made to feel less desirable, less than human, and feeling like that can lead to being closed off, so YEAH, fuck off to anyone who hates the stereotype. it can be very relatable but is not the end all, and it is not our fault if a character as such, or not, doesn't come off outwardly sexual or romantic.
seriously, tag your aro/ace headcanon characters and your canon characters. maybe they all have the same appearance, or personality but is that really our fault if that's all the media has allowed us? no, it's not, and i doubt we're as full as the same types of characters as we're told we are. or, hell, maybe we are and haters gonna hate us because we and our aspec coded babes don't want to be their friend, let alone anything else.
#wednesday addams#katniss everdeen#tyler townsend#yeah i headcanon him as ace#yeah i headcanon him as aro#he is on the spectrum for sure#i don't care what anyone says#i don't care what is added to the show later#he is coded for real#who else my mind is blank#five hargreeves#sometimes i think bruce wayne is on the spectrum sue me#princess merida#tori spring#felix graham de vanily#yelena belova#reyna arellano#kusuo saiki#peridot#issac henderson#alix kubdel#raphael santiago#jughead jones#aroace#aro#ace#lgbtq representation#asexual#aromantic#hope mikaelson
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D:BH Rarepairsweek 7 | @dbhrarepairs
Day 3: Hank/Markus After the revolution, Markus and Hank are both trying to deal with the new situation they've been handed. Their paths cross.
#dbhrarepairsweek#hank anderson#dbh markus#hank x markus#hankus#??? idk but ive seen someone else at least use this tag so i might as well#detroit: become human#d:bh#dbhrarepairs#aight. this might be the rarest pairing im doing this week. maybe.#IM BRINGING MY HANK/MARKUS AGENDA TO THIS EVENT#IVE BEEN KEEPING IT LOWKEY (the fics are wip) SO FAR BUT. NOW IT IS TIME.#look ive been examining these two in my brains for a while now. it makes sense to me.#you will understand my vision.#i was debating writer a longer caption but once again: i'd let you fill in the blanks for this one#i might make more specific content for them in the future#like i had even more interesting scenes to use but im doing this gifset for now hehe#MY VIEW ON THIS was like. Connor getting more involved in android stuff because he wants to support Markus#Hank relapses a bit with his mental health issues but manages it better than he has ever done before#Markus who is burnt out and trying to find rest and dealing with his own demons#manages to notice Hank's struggles. Helps him out lowkey. Is interested in him.#then TO BE CONTINUED#I THINK THE IDEA OF THEM TALKING IS SO FASCINATING ALRIGHT#also. obv. if you see this as platonic only then that is up to you i cannot take it from you and feel free to reblog i absolutely wont mind#but to clarify: markus would be down bad for hank. that's MY canon. I know it in my heart.
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Why I Am Not Coming In To Work Today [abridged], Jess Zimmerman
part one | part two
#me when everybody is posting the maple leafs sad narratives and i am furiously generating this like HOLD ONNNN HOLD ONNNNNNN#honestly i could've been SOOOO MEAN about this because i saw this poem & alexandra got the preview on the poetry blog#where i just reblogged the first half of this poem point blank with the tags#kyle dubas#toronto maple leafs#& got yelled at aksdaksf & it literally only didn't go on this blog bc i usually write more & then it was percolating & i looked up the poe#& it was only the FIRST PART i'd reblogged i didn't know there was more & then brain immediately went brrrrr ok time for an edit.#this is a long one lol & i also have no idea if it makes sense to anybody but me but because y'all know me i will always overexplain so!!#my reasoning for the reasons obvi kyle. that's a given i hope he's doing well i hope he & his family r good but man is not coming in to wor#the second edit took me a stupid amount of time bc i am nitpicky but also i learned how to do the layers & transparency from the claude edi#that actually y'all don't know about lmao but i lost my mind when i saw how perfectly those pictures align i was scrolling getty & was like#ok december i'm gonna do a headline one (in my brain with the november/june quote about choosing to die again) w/ maple leafs playoff odds#how they say at winter break you know who's gonna be in the playoffs & who'll win & they thought they had a shot but it's mitchie overlaid#the 2003-04 team who'd last won a playoff round with the atlantic division stats from dec for 22-23 & how long it's been & dec headlines#i wanted breakup/recent/never loved to be a recent trade acquisition somebody who bounced around & somebody else so i almost had simmer#brodie & zar but then i wanted to make murray for breakup at any time &i forgot zar & him were on the pens together &it hit me like a truc#bc there's a photo of the two of them EXACTLY the same so close it's scary of this one but them as pens so they had to be it & i did always#know never loved again was mitchie. sorry. also mitchie in the penalty box the last game but i couldn't find footage of it & this one works#no i could not find a photo of tyler bertuzzi fighting a leaf for a dog looked at me yes i tried.#i almost made the bunting photo jt but instead it's 'bunting a rat etc' anyway the one i really feel unhinged about is dead pets bc at firs#i was gonna make it the handshake line & look to see if the leafs had drafted anybody on the panthers (dead pet former draft pick)#& they had & it was carter verhaeghe & i couldn't get a good pic of matthews & verhaeghe but it's fine bc i thought about the mo/luke schen#narrative (in which they are a perfect d pair long lost) & schenn was drafted by the leafs & that line fits jut trust me. also how i feel#about the kniesy luminous line that one possessed me it had to be kniesy idk why. i almost put gussy as girls are too pretty though ALSO#did u like my joke. daylight SAVINGS time on the goalie. thank u. also my photo magic on the jt (me very poorly editing in him as an isle)#OK ALSO HOLD ONNNNN there is a part two but i have to wait for the Content i want it will come out as soon as [redacted] or sooner#if i get bad at waiting &everyone will pretend like it is always the way it will be once i have the photos i want. speaking of did the leaf#simply not take a team photo this year?? it Does Not Exist for me i have tried very hard to look for it also i'm excited for part 2#one of them is named oh you're so unhinged for this one & the finished product is you're unhinged in ways you didn't even know u were sorry#liv in the replies
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okay i just marathoned the entirety of ATLA live action & i might do an actual review of it explaining my thoughts more in depth, but the TLDR version basically boils down to this:
if you want to watch Avatar: The Last Airbender, just go watch the 2005 cartoon
#i was trying to keep an open mind & all that cuz of OPLA (my beloved) but. holy shit it was actually worse than i expected :/#like what were they thinking. did they use AI to write this or are the writers just like. really shitty#notes: they linger too much on random bullshit & refuse to move character development along#they tell when they should be showing & when they DO show it's for stuff that benefited from brief environmental storytelling in the OG#the plot drags so hard it was basically stagnant#there were some fun things but like. those things could've been funner if they'd been given the time other useless stuff was taking up#they changed so many minor details that really don't matter in order to make them more important#but this failed spectacularly because now there's just. stupid bullshit clogging up the plot??#instead of having 10 minute monologues 3 times an episode about plot irrelevant things#they should have taken a page out of the original's book & kept minor details to a minimum & focused on ACTUAL PLOT#SO MUCH CGI. LIKE I KNOW THEY NEED IT BUT COME ON. EVEN THE CHARACTERS?????? WHO ARE JUST STANDING THERE????????#they were given 8 hours & almost all of it was Aang angsting (lol) over being the avatar & not practicing actual bending#& then they ended the plot too early so they had to fill in the last like 20 minutes with something else#so they made up random lore that literally makes no sense. & overexplained all of it to the point i was blanking out from boredom#i think this is why i didn't enjoy Korra. they over explain the spirit world stuff & avatar powers & bending#that plus i just don't vibe with the aesthetic#being a writer is a curse because when i dislike something it's because i know exactly what went wrong & why#it's always with the analyzing & the judging & the internal note taking#even when i really try i can't just enjoy shit for fun
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um. uh. hi every body. something evil and malevolent happened in my brain this month.
this is. um. a Jet Set Radio/Pokemon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers of Death joke AU, spawned out of a in-joke that started in a pokepasta discord. my apologies to both the pokepasta and jsr fandoms
the entire basis is the idea that Corn in Future retconned og JSR Beat as leader/founder of the GGs (is beat being leader in the og even CANON?) so Corn and Beat are the Myras. no it's not a joke funny enough to justify how many hours i sunk into drawing these. no attempt was made to change the setting, assign most of the other cast, or otherwise make this au hold up to ANY amount of scrutiny. if i tried to make this actually work somehow then i'd REALLY end up too far gone. also i keep calling myrtle!beat "Meat".
MEANWHILE, IN A BETTER UNIVERSE:,
#jet set radio#pokepasta#creepypasta#jsr#explorers of death#pokemon#crossover#gore#body horror#blood#ask to tag#long post#jsr eod#also i said ''i didnt assign almost anyone else'' but thats not entirely true.#i did assign dj professor k as wigglytuff. but i decided i needed to draw a line in the sand somewhere#and drawing dj k as eod!wigglytuff is simply too much. some mental images really DONT need to be inflicted on others#i also thought about who would be grovyle and ended up leaning towards combo#i sort of think of him as having protagonist swag about him bc of chapter 2 in teh first game.#also i have a running joke w my sibling about combo being meta-aware bc of a jp-only line he has in future#where he tells roboy he wants to save.#i swear to god i had more reasoning than this but my mind is drawing a blank rn. sad#also i guess this would imply that cube and coin would be celebi and dusknoir but theyre not even in explorers of death so RIP#i did also briefly consider clutch as grovyle bc 1. stealing things lol and 2. joke about him being future-exclusive#and grovyle is FROM DA FUTURE... but frankly clutch does not feel like he could pull off being grovyle. in my opinion.#also i guess sitting here now i suppose it wouldnt even make sense in the context of the eod au cuz everyone but the main trio is og jsr#on that note. i had no idea what to do for gum's design so i chose the most awkward route possible i guess. im sorry gum.#in general gum kinda got the short end of the stick here due to being consistently the Second-in-Command meaning she's shadow#I'M SORRY WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#well at least she's better off than yoyo. me n my sibling just automatically were like ''he's bidoof'' ''yeah he's bidoof''#also like last note. but. the jet set radio fandom is SEVERELY lacking cliche edgy over the top evil creepypasta versions of the cast
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(gets into a hobby that's very complicated and has limited documented instruction for everything i want to learn the farther and more niche i get into it just bc of the nature of a lot of the more complicated things i find are uploaded by one person who didn't make a tutorial) what the fuck. why is this hard
#things dont click in my brain i think lol#like i know how to do chainmail and i can do some pretty tricky weaves and occasionally extrapolate how to do something from a picture if#it's very simple and easy to understand bc it's comparable to something else i've done#but im not making my own patterns or experimenting w my own stuff like so many ppl i see online#and like w glassblowing i can follow the steps kind of but my mind blanks and i can't like. work with limitations or experiment or try new#techniques like every other person i know who is into glassblowing can. and it's like whatever but im so sick of plateauing and wish i could#just understand how something works and its properties so i can then work within those properties like feel like im getting out of a#tutorial stage where i can move on my own and feel like im actually really good at something when i've had years of experience with it#alex talks
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concept: the black widow and jane foster 'the other boleyn girl' au.
#i only just realised they were both in that film#when talking to a fren about how thingy johansson has flat affect which was a phrase my mind had been blanking on for ages#(no pun intended)#but i feel like i've seen gifs of her looking quite emotive so maybe that's just her acting style? i don't know.#BUT ANYWAY!#i can't remember who else was in it but i remember portman in a lovely green frock#and i think that movie may be another of those productions where the queen of england only owns one necklace?#philippa FUCKING gregory
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Thank you for the tags today @artsyunderstudy @fatalfangirl @whatevertheweather @onepintobean @johnwgrey @shrek-gogurt @aroace-genderfluid-sheep @hushed-chorus @chen-chen-chen-again-chen I haven’t gotten to everyone yet but I will! And your words will be awesome I am sure 💛
I’ve got a little more of my Watford-era smut for my Secret Snowflake Exchange fic. Did I mention this is a sex pollen fic? It may have been obvious from the last snippet I posted, but if it wasn’t, now you know 🥰
Baz
“It’s just…” he sighs dramatically. “Are you sure you want to do this?”
“Fuck, no,” I scoff, ignoring the way my cock throbs at the thought. I keep my arms anchored at my sides and clutch the legs of my trousers. Even though I’m dying to palm at myself, I refuse to do so in front of him. I think I’d die from shame if I did.
“Then why did you offer?” he asks, wrinkling his nose. He’s squirming like he needs to piss. (Definitely attempting to rub one out right in front of me, then.)
“I offered because it was a logical solution. But just because I’m willing to, doesn’t mean I want to,” I say in a withering voice.
Ah, angsty, horny Watford Baz. I love you so. As much as I’d love to continue to sit in car and play on tumblr, I should probably get on with my Xmas shopping. (Gifting is not my strong suit. If I could outsource this task to someone better at it, I would in a heartbeat.) (And yet here I am, posting about a gift fic that I’m thoroughly enjoying writing. I guess sometimes gifting is fun. When you know what the person wants! Hooray for prompts!)
Tagging @facewithoutheart @aristocratic-otter @moodandmist @captain-aralias @bookish-bogwitch @creepyspice @cutestkilla @raenestee (Raen every time I go to tag you and start typing, Rainbow’s name shows up first and I SWEAT BULLETS worrying I’ll tag her instead 🤣) @nightimedreamersworld @ivelovedhimthroughworse @whogaveyoupermission @ic3-que3n
#snowbaz#simon snow#baz pitch#carry on fanfiction#my writing#again my mind has blanked on who else likes smut so if I left you off forgive me I am being overly cautious
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if you get this, answer with three random facts about yourself and send it to the last seven blogs in your notifs! anon or not, doesn’t matter, let’s get to know the person behind the blog <3
Ha, I don't know about 7 Blogs but I'll try!
Thank you for the ask! 💙 3 facts about myself!
1. Ironically, I grew up watching the Harry Potter movies, and was always the same age as Daniel Radcliffe. But when I got older and into college, I finally read the books. And now I'm a hardcore nerd over Cannon and book facts.
2. The reason behind my username. So I'm a Ravenclaw, and Luna was always my favorite because I felt like I was her in school growing up. So that's the last half. Orion comes from the fact that I happen to have the constellation 'Orion's Belt' on my cheek, naturally from beauty marks (flat moles lol). And I grew up a Hunter, which Orion is also known as the Hunter, so I feel a sort of kinship to it. And I LOVE the stars. So yeah lol.
3. My two passions in life (not including being a mother) that I would love to make a career on, is first writing, and second, cooking/baking. But getting to write fan fiction for all of you is sort of filling one of those lol.
#it was hard to think of facts weirdly enough#who else thinks of these things randomly like#oh... that might make a good fact one day#but when it's time to remember them my mind goes blank lol
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hey sorry i can't come to work today im thinking about the various implications of zombie horror and the way it affects people
#saw the post the other day about horror movies reflecting the greatest fears of society at the current time#..... it was so ouuugh#anyway zombie movies. fear of infection and pandemic type situations obviously#but also. a running thread in all Zombie Media ™ since forever has been like. someone you love got bitten and now u have to kill them etc#i think that's really interesting because it also ties into another thing about zombies: fear of being changed‚ involuntary#does the zombie know what it used to be? is the hunger filling an otherwise blank mind?#or is it just strong enough to override everything else?#what would that feel like though. both possibilities are unsettling because in case 1 you Die by most definitions#and something else looks like you and pilots your body around#actually that is very similar to imposter horror innit. ''guy in the team who got bitten but doesn't tell anyone until its too late''#and in case 2.... ooooihhhhhhh that's so much worse <3 you're alive you just can't do anything about it. just hungry#and now onto the third fear associated with zombie horror (and my favourite): the fear of being hunted‚ on a wide scale#think abt it. it's unclear whether humans actually count as apex predators. but population-wise we don't actually have A Specific Animal#- that hunts us#and that's not because we are fast or have sharp teeth or are adapted hunters. that's just because we're great at living in a society#and zombies are A Predator on a significant scale and we are NOT prepared for it#beecaaauusee--- [dramatic crescendo] they will exploit the *very* thing that made us so invincible in the first place!! 💞#one of the first signs of civilization is healed bones. cured sickness.#a human seeing another human looking sick/injured and immediately rushing to help. is a big part of why we've made it this far#zombies have our faces!!! they know how to walk and unlock doors and climb the stairs to our buildings#AND. AND. they're people you think you know. back again to the killing a loved one thing#that's so BRILLIANT as a tactic because the societal tactics that make people group together will now make them reluctant to kill zombies#WHICH IS WHY most media tries to dehumanize zombies in some way to make it easier. ohhhh they grunt and can't talk. they're slow.#they don't feel anything. they are not the person they look like. they're not even people. the alternative is much much worse#and i need it explored. what if they can run. what if they beg and plead that they're still the same person. what if they scream.#what if they say ''sorry i love you so much im sorry'' at the end. etc
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ah i see. only rich and popular people make it to where they wanna go. i get it now
#just sitting here not even feeling that bad and my mind is instantly#telling me Do It. take the pills scratch yourself do anything that will peave a mark because thats the only way you#know how to let pwople know youre struggling brcause youre the worst at asking for things like comfort and friendship bc u dont deserve it#for real man im having to start to set reminders to remind me to actually eat because every day is just so blank that i just sit theough it#and honest to god forget to eat. at all. and its being interpreted as 'wanting to lose weight' when its actually the fact that#i dont want to feed myself anymore. i dont like me. i will do anything that will indirectly rwsult in Unalive because Holy Shit this hurta#i dont. have much twthering me down anymore. i really dont. my friends dont check in (reasonably so) bc im ass at responding#and to everyone else i am the Happy :) Guy who is Never Sad so like SIKE lol#(standing under a large icicle) oh nooo i sure hope this doesnt fall right onto my noggin and end me :)#local idiot sad#idk guess i gotta do something at least. to mess with so i can see a physical reaction ro rhis shit
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i'm so glad we're going to the castle after all lol. i picked to let the cat choose because 1. the cat is a competent and respectable leader and 2. i hoped it would mean essentially just letting you choose your favourite
The weird animal researcher's abandoned castle ruins aren't the same location as the creepy snowy castle mentioned in the first poll, but I am glad we get to go to some sort of old castle regardless >:3 (assuming he can actually make it there). This one is actually cooler, since old ruins are always more fun than upkept structures anyway. Navigating the decaying property might be an issue though lol
#paventure posting#also youre entirely right. the cat is a competent and respectable leader. If only they could talk.. The adventurer would never run#into another issue again lol#I'm not certain if this is set in my world or not (Nanyevimi - the actual fantasy setting I do all of my worldbuilding for)#so far nothing that has happened has made it where that CAN'T be the case. But I'm also not sure whether I want to follow the canon#rules of my setting OR just have this be a one-off vaguely fantasy inspired adventure world just for this poll thing#ANYWAY - if it were in my setting - then talking animals are not really a thing there (though pseudo-talking animals that are#actually just manufactured puppet creatures enchanted by magic or with someone else's soul inside or etc. could exist#but not like LITERALLY.. ''this is just a cat who can magically talk'' lol)#However if it's not my setting and doesn't have to follow the rules of the magic system there - then theoretically the cat could actually#be like.. one of those Magically Intelligent Companion Animals from fantasy stories and could possibly be given the tools#to speak or communicate better. Though I think thats also not as much fun lol. I like the limitation that even if it WERE some sort#of very intelligent magical animal - it's still confined by the boundaries of not being able to communicate well and thus#just has to follow around Kind Of Heart Silly Of Mind adventurers rolling their eyes as obvious answers to problems#are looked over or bad decisions are made lol#ANYWAY. I don't have any background decided about The Adventurer (like how he met the cat. etc.) since the story should be kept vague#for people doing the polls to fill in the blanks. So really it could be up to interpretation. The general public can decide in their minds#whether it's just a normal very loyal cute cat. a magically intelligent cat. some mix of the two. etc.#ANYWAY
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.
#it’s my wedding anniversary today and I’m in a snit#not for the typical romcom reasons one might assume that a woman might be a snit about like#’he forgot our anniversary!’ or ‘he never brings me flowers!’ or ‘we’re not doing anything special because i didn’t plan it!’#i specifically planned nothing except for my regular routine because I don’t WANT to do anything special#it’s just Wednesday#and i know that to some folks that’s just a passive aggressive way of a woman communicating that she wants more out of an experience#but i seriously don’t. in fact I’m annoyed that he took the day off instead of just the afternoon like he said he was intending to do#THAT I was able to fit into my morning routine. i knew I’d still have coffee and reading and Spanish time to myself#then i realized he was all in my space making a ton of noise and i got a sinking feeling in my stomach and understood#that he took the whole damn day off#which is fine—he’s entitled to do that and I’m not going to argue with it#but where is the communication?#did he think that this is what count as ‘spontaneous’ and ‘romantic���? he doesn’t know the meaning of the words!#and I know this by now! 23 years of marriage is a long time to NOT know that and hope for more#i have made my peace with this arrangement. he works and i manage the house and work on myself during my copious alone time#so to have him in my space when i just want to read my stupid smutty book and learn reflexive verbs rankles me#i asked point blank why he was bothering to take the day off and he said ‘to spend time with me’#dude we spend time together all the time and most of that time you’re face down in a sudoku puzzle or coding#which is fine because you know have your hobbies I’m not stopping you#so unless you have a specific plan in mind that would justify trainwrecking the morning routine of an autistic woman#a woman who has accepted a plain and unadorned life without sex or romance#then take off the afternoon that you said you were going to take off and let that be it ok?#i don’t want flowers. i don’t want a card. i do want the fancy grilled cheese we talked about before i remembered it was our anniversary#tbh Wednesday is just gyros night and I suggested the gourmet grilled cheese place as a change of pace that’s all#i don’t even want to go to the art museum. I’d rather play video games tbh#agh Samantha who are you talking to? the faint outline of a man who chose someone else? yes i guess i am#sighing into the void#anyway. off to go learn how to properly use me te se nos etc. etc.
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EVERY YOU EVERY ME #9
COLLABORATED WITH @THIRSTWORLDPROBLEMSS
Pairing: Miguel O'Hara x female reader
Summary: You get a new mysterious co-worker.
Word count: 8,100
Series Masterlist | Spiderverse Masterlist | Astroboot’s Masterlist | thirstworldproblemss’ Masterlist
[Previous] [TBC]
August 1st
Nearly pancaked by grand piano falling from the 8th floor outside of favorite cafe. No casualties (except the piano).
August 5th
Freak blizzard out of nowhere during lunch. Nearly crushed by large icicle dropping directly outside the exit of the Chrysler building. No other known casualty.
August 6th
An escaped hippopotamus from the Bronx zoo ran 11.3 miles, nearly got stampeded when exiting hotel for work. No casualties.
August 12th
Tornado appeared inside the Guggenheim museum, nearly squashed by large falling statue. Nobody nearby was seriously injured.
It's already mid-August now. You've used up more than a month of your allotted three. It means you don't have much more time to waste, but that knowledge does nothing to help you in figuring things out.
You’ve compiled a comprehensive list of the Universe's ongoing murder attempts, determined to keep track of them all. All in all, there are 37 incidents and counting that you’re aware of… and they’re all different.
They differ in severity. They differ in scale and they differ in frequency. Sometimes it can take weeks, sometimes days, sometimes within hours of each other. If there’s any sort of pattern to them—anything that might help you predict what will happen next or how to stop it—you can’t see it. There’s nothing that gives you any hint or clue as to where you can start to make progress with solving this mystery.
The one thing you have been able to observe from cataloging these incidents is that Miguel was right about what he told you that day at Starbucks: the universe is ramping up. Each attempt is becoming more and more bizarre, defying the very laws of physics and nature in its attempts to snuff you out. Before this, in all of your years in New York, you’ve never heard of a blizzard in July or a tornado indoors.
With the escalating dangers, Miguel is more on guard than ever. Sticking close to you at all times like a particularly insistent herding dog that’s always a few inches from nipping at your heels. Even when he’s seemingly preoccupied by something else—reading a book, folding clothes, eating a crate of kit kats in one sitting—you can always tell that he’s keenly aware of and attuned to your every minute move.
Practically, the only time he lets you out of his sight is for bathroom visits.
Work is still a point of contention between you two. He hates that he can't enter the building to monitor you at work and make sure you're safe, and after that incident when you caught a co-worker trying to take a surreptitious selfie with Spiderman while Miguel was loitering around in the windows, you’d banned him from climbing and scuttering around the exterior of the building like some deranged squirrel.
It’s made him even less pleased about your whole work situation, something he’s not shy about sharing with you. Every morning when you are about to leave for work, Miguel will stand by the door with that ever present frown and ask you:
“Why are you still going into a job you hate when there’s only two months left?”
This morning, you sigh as you reach for your jacket and messenger bag.
Part of you completely understands and even agrees with his logic. If the end of the world is only two months away, why go back to that shithole everyday? You could go to Disneyland. Eat fancy croissants in Paris for breakfast. Have Lyla fake a reservation at an all-inclusive yoga retreat in Bali. You could be living your life like every moment is your last.
The thing is though, as delusional as it may be, you’re not ready to bet on the world ending just yet.
“Miguel, I fully intend for the universe to still be around in two months. And I don’t want to be unemployed when that day comes. I’m not some trust fund baby. Once we figure this thing out, you’re gonna be free to go, and if you take Lyla with you, then what am I supposed to do? Live on the streets? Rent in the city is ridiculous, and my rent-controlled apartment got blown into a million pieces.”
For once Miguel doesn’t seem to have anything smart to say back. He tilts his head, quietly studying your face. Then after a long pause, he gives you a curt nod, as if something clicked into place.
"Fine."
You stop mid-way through zipping up one of your boots to eye him suspiciously.
Okay, that’s… different.
In all the mornings you’ve repeated this argument, this is the first time he’s simply accepted your explanation without sassing you back. He just gazes right back, apparently unperturbed, and holds the door of your hotel room open for you, ready to walk you to work.
There is definitely something going on inside his head, because this stubborn dummy never lets anything go without a fight. You just don’t know what it is yet.
By mid-morning, you've forgotten all about your suspicions, too busy dealing with the aftermath of your coworker's incompetence. You're not entirely sure how they managed to corrupt the Excel formula you’d painstakingly inserted to make sure all the numbers add up correctly, but two hours later, you're still trying to get the data to compute properly.
It’s the kind of mind numbing task that lets your mind wander, and you spend most of that morning wondering what Miguel is up to. He’s probably lingering near the building, eating mini donuts by the dozens from that food truck that is always parked around the corner.
There’s a pointed series of knocks on your cubicle wall. The noise is grating, and it makes the whole of your back seize up because you recognize that signature knock from sound alone. It’s your boss, probably here to ask if you have capacity to take on more case evaluations.
And sure enough, as you reluctantly turn to look, you see her, toothy smile and all, looking down at you in that hammy and strained way of hers.
“Are you busy?” she asks. “I just wanted to introduce you to the newest member of the team.”
She gestures to the person standing beside her. Your gaze goes up over their insanely long legs, up and over the narrow and tapered waist and torso, up over the wide chest and broad, broad shoulders, and even before you get to the familiar face, you already know who you are looking at, because no one else is that tall.
Your mouth gapes open wide in shock.
This stupid motherf-
“This is Mickey O’Hara,” your boss introduces, simpering up at him. (You didn’t even know she knew how to simper.)
Has Miguel gone insane?
What is he playing at?!
He didn’t even bother to change his name properly!
And the man looks unfairly good in office casual! He’s dressed in a white, well-fitted button down shirt and dress pants. Wearing ridiculous thick-rimmed glasses that would belong on Gregory Peck. Riotous curls are as messy and wild as ever, not having even bothered to comb it back. You don’t know who he thinks he’s fooling, the subdued get-up only makes him stick out like a sore thumb.
“Mickey is our newest hire,” your boss continues, batting her eyes at him. “He's interning with our team as a junior insurance claims adjuster and will be shadowing you for the next two months.”
After that, Miguel truly is with you everywhere you go.
He spends most of each workday sitting on a spare chair in your small cubicle, the two of you squeezed into 6'x6', shoulder touching shoulder in that tiny, cramped space.
A superhero he may be, but Miguel is a terrible office worker. He seems completely bamboozled by the copier, and you quickly learn not to ask him to do any copying or scanning or even pick your printouts from the printer, because he always manages to mangle the process, coming back with crumpled up prints or half-shredded paper that looks like budget confetti.
Before the week is over, he’s gained a reputation with the rest of the team as the handsome-but-useless junior that can’t even make coffee for shit.
Most of the time, he doesn't even make an effort to look like he’s doing any actual work, just sits right next to you, and reads books all day long. When you scold him and ask him to at least pretend like he's doing busy work, or he'll get fired, Miguel will just shrug and quietly hum back at you, engrossed in whatever latest sci-fi book his nose is buried in.
"If they fire me, I'll just have Lyla hack into their HR system and rehire me."
Then there’s the way his sleeves are always rolled up halfway up his arm, hugging tight around the firm muscles of his forearm. The peep show of gorgeously tanned skin that is always on display for all to see. It's obscene.
He’s maddening and distracting.
Still, you can’t be too mad about his presence. The office is a much more treacherous place than you’d initially thought. It’s a danger zone of death traps.
One morning when you’re in the supply room, getting a new pad of post-its from one of the massive industrial shelves—the ones that are supposed to be bolted to the wall for safety—suddenly crumpled, taking half the wall with it and nearly flattening you. That was almost game over for you. Squashed like a bug and entombed under a pile of archived TPS reports.
Then there’s that time with the runaway elevator when the supposedly secure and unbreakable industrial cables snaps, with you in it, falling through 40 floors. And you still shudder everytime you walk past the copy machine because of that time it tried to electrocute you. If Miguel hadn’t been there for all of these incidents, you’d be a goner.
Another upside is that it’s also nice to have a cubicle buddy. On slow days, the two of you kill time watching YouTube origami tutorials and practicing with post-its stolen from the temporarily-relocated office supplies.
Despite having hands the size of a giant, Miguel is surprisingly good at it. Delicately folding paper cranes, butterflies and flowers that sit in the place of pride atop of your computer screen, compared to your questionable attempts that usually wind up in a crumpled ball in the trash.
With Miguel there, your days at the office are never boring or predictable in the way they used to be. It no longer feels like you are just going through motions. It's almost… fun.
If there wasn’t a cosmic executioner’s ax looming over your neck, you don’t think you would mind spending every day with him like this.
You take it back. You do mind spending days with him like this. Miguel is the worst.
You've been doing data entry all morning, and the man will not shut up about how primitive Excel is.
“Malo! I don’t understand how your company relies on this software. There are so many data consistency issues! It completely lacks data validation and integrity checks, and it’s too prone to human error when entering crucial data, which results in–”
You take deep calming breaths as you continue to type, trying to pretend his rant is white noise.
The previous day's near death experience—an electrical surge from the printer, trying to finish what the copy machine started—also wiped out one of the file servers, and now you and half your department are stuck manually re-entering three years worth of data.
Two hours in, your fingers are aching, and you're about ready to start banging your head on the keyboard out of frustration. (Or banging the keyboard on Miguel’s head if he doesn’t shut up.)
Like he can hear your thoughts, the man in question obligingly stops talking, and there’s a moment of blessed silence before your chair glides smoothly and suddenly to the left as Miguel rolls you out from in front of your computer. Your first instinct is to wonder what new danger he’s saving you from, but no… He’s just moving you out of the way to make space for him to drag his own chair in front of the screen. “Enough,” he says firmly, already typing out some unintelligibly complex code at a speed that far outstrips your own personal best of 67 words per minute, “I can’t watch you keep doing this when it’s so simple to automate.”
You sometimes forget just how smart Miguel is.
True, he can’t seem to work the office printer, but he’s a genius scientist who single-handedly built an A.I. sophisticated enough to hack into financial institutions and topple governments. He successfully invented a machine that travels between dimensions. Every other sentence coming out of his mouth sounds like something that would confound Stephen Hawking. You don’t know why you’re surprised he’s able to automate Excel spreadsheets.
It doesn’t take him very long at all.
Within minutes, he’s finished, hitting enter one final time, and then you can see all of the cells rectify themselves one by one. Errors disappear and new corrected information appears, data populating blank cells and aligning itself in tidy rows.
You lean in closer to get a better look. Your elbow snags the edge of your coffee cup and the cup topples over, splashing runaway hot coffee across your hand.
Before you have a chance to react, there’s a strong pull backwards. Miguel is already grabbing you and pulling you sideways into his lap and out of the firing range.
The cup clatters off the edge of the desk and onto the floor. The rest of the burning liquid never had the time to land on you.
Then you’re sitting on top of him, confined in the much too small seat of the office chair that can barely fit him and his broad backside, and much less the both of you. But if it’s uncomfortable, Miguel doesn’t show it. He takes your hand in his to inspect it carefully.
The patch of skin burns and stings, but you can’t tell if it’s from the coffee or his burning touch that makes you feel like there’s liquid fire simmering in your veins.
“You okay?” he says, his voice right in your ear.
He is so close. Surrounding you. Broad arms locked around your waist and the firm muscles of his thick thighs under yours.
“Yeah,” you manage, nodding slowly. Your tongue feels heavy and dry in your mouth.
He quietly drags your hand closer to his face, then blows on the back of your burnt knuckles to soothe the sting.
“Better?”
Those stunning eyes are staring into yours from inches away, cut cheeks right there, nose barely brushing against yours, and – god, is he close. Too close.
Miguel is always in close proximity to you these days. Never more than a couple yards away, but save for life or death situations, the two of you do not find yourself like this. He only ever holds you when you’re crashing through the skies or about to collide with a runaway vehicle. This is different somehow.
Your heart feels like a trapped bird in your chest, fluttering so fast and panicky it might burst from inside out at the proximity.
“I– um– ah…” You’re not saying any words, just making strange noises in your throat like a squawking bird.
Your eyes flicker away from his face avoidantly and from the corner of your eye, you spot Matt from accounting spying on you from the cubicle across.
Oh god. This probably doesn’t look great, does it?
You’re sitting on a co-worker’s lap in the middle of an open plan office. Compromising does not even begin to describe the position you two are in.
Jumping off his lap, you quickly stand up and turn away, trying to ignore the flustered heat in your cheeks.
You walk back over to your chair, about to sit yourself back down, but there’s spilled coffee everywhere. The dark brown liquid quickly sinking into the already stained fabric of the seat. You need to clean this up or else your chair is going to smell like expired coffee for the rest of time. Grabbing for your bag, you start digging for some tissues so you don't have to walk up to the supply closet.
You pull out item after item. Tampons. Sunglasses. A half-eaten chocolate bar. More tampons. New wallet with new ID, (expedited, all courtesy of Lyla). A handful of pennies. A random pamphlet. Still no tissues though, so you upend your bag onto your desk, wincing at the clatter.
How on Earth have you accumulated this much stuff in the few short weeks since your apartment was destroyed? And how on Earth do you not have any kleenex or napkins or anything in your handbag??
You paw through the mess, hoping for something useful, then swear as some of it spills over onto the floor. Ducking down, you crawl half under your desk, collecting wayward tampons and receipts, until your eyes pause on the pamphlet.
Not just any pamphlet. It’s yellow and bright with Whoopie Goldberg's face in the corner. It's the map you received from the fortune teller lady. One of your many misfires.
Now that you look closely at it, there are faint lines that seem to glow faintly in the dimness under your desk that weren't there when you were looking at it in plain daylight.
You pick it up and unfold it, laying it out on the floor. It looks like it’s been written on with some kind of a glow-in-the-dark marker, but it’s not dark enough for you to see clearly. You need to get somewhere darker to test your theory.
Backing out from under your desk, you get to your feet and head briskly off down the hall. You barely make it three steps before Miguel’s on your tail, his towering height blocking out the bright LED lamps above as he follows after you like the world’s biggest duckling.
“Cielo, what’s wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong,” you murmur curtly under your breath. The heat from before is still riding persistently on your face, and you quicken your steps, hoping it doesn’t show.
You half run to the end of the hall until you reach the small supply closet. When you open the door to step inside, Miguel is right behind you, apparently trying to squeeze himself in after you.
"We won't both fit in here!" you scold as you close the door after you. His unhappy expression is the last thing you see as darkness envelops you in the pitch black.
There’s a niggling feeling of guilt that wiggles down into your skin. But you remind yourself that you can always steal cupcakes meant for clients from the conference room to make it up to him. All will be forgiven if you appease his sweet tooth.
Ducking your head to stare down at the map clutched in your hands, you squint your eyes in the dark to study it closely. There's a small star glowing bright in the middle of the map.
It's a literal star map.
She gave you a location.
You're standing in front of an old stone building at 177A Bleecker Street, smack in the middle of Greenwich village with its picturesque ivy covered old brownstone houses.
Then there's this monstrosity: Sanctum Sanctorum. The infamous residence of Dr. Strange.
The mansion is built in a mix of a Victorian and Gothic style as if the architect couldn't make up their mind and just decided 'why not both?' Throughout the rooftop, there are ornate carvings and intricate stonework that you suspect was meant to lend it a mysterious air, but instead the place reminds you of Disney’s Haunted Mansion ride attraction.
You bring up your hand to the old knocker, gripping it firmly. Your lungs tighten, breath constricting in your chest as you hesitate, unable to bring yourself to pull the brass down to make contact with the wooden front door. Instead you’re holding it still in the air.
Maybe this isn’t a good idea after all. How are you going to explain this?
‘The universe is out to get me, please send Avengers to help.’
Isn’t he just going to think you’re nuts? One of those delusional Supes-fan with munchausen syndrome?
"We can still leave," Miguel says.
The man's been protesting every step of the way here, buzzing in your head about how much of a bad idea this is.
You frown, turning around to him. "I want to do this,” you answer.
His continued opposition is the final push you need. You bring down the knocker against the front door and tap it repeatedly.
There's no answer.
Part of you has to fight the urge to turn your feet and flee, saving yourself the embarrassment. But before you do, there’s a loud creak and a heavy scraping noise against the entrance as the double door swings inwards and slowly opens.
No one greets you by the door. The entryway before you is empty, revealing a grand imperial staircase leading to the second floor, curving upward into a majestic spiral on each side of the room.
It looks deserted. It’d be impolite to just step inside without someone to greet you and explicitly invite you in. But the doors did open to let you in.
You look at Miguel, unsure of what to do, but the man does not have the same compunction for politeness that you do, he’s already walked in, shoes and all, straight into the main hall.
“Can we just get this over with without you making your usual stupid grand dramatic entrance?” Miguel says into the empty room seemingly to no one in particular and you don’t know who he thinks he’s talking to.
A ring of ember and fire sparks into existence out of nothingness in the center of the room. The ring grows wider, and you can see hints of another room inside of the circle: one decorated in a different decoration style than the current room you’re in: moroccan seats and plush cushions with oriental wooden carved furniture.
A man steps out from within that room to stand in front of you both. The ring of light closes behind him once he’s made it through. Clad in a rich purple tunic and dark robes that is monk-like in appearance. Miguel steps in front of you, tucking you safely behind him.
"You're not Strange," Miguel sneers, and you want to smack him. Why does he always have to be this rude?
"Oh, I'm quite strange. But I am not the Doctor. I am Wong. I’m the Sorcerer Supreme and guardian of this place." The man’s voice is calm and formal, and he holds himself with a stately manner as he speaks.
You pop out your head from behind Miguel’s side. "We’re here to see Doctor Strange."
At the repeated mention of Strange, the man’s formality seems to fall away, an expression of irritation bleeding into his features.
"Let me know when you find him. Because he is not here."
"Where is he?" Miguel asks, and there’s that contempt rumbling in his voice again.
"I do not know. Probably playing hooky again. The man comes and goes as he likes." Wong makes a muttering noise under his breath as he continues. "Treats this sacred place like a summer gig at McDonalds."
Your chest deflates. How are you supposed to get Dr. Strange to help you if he’s not even here?
"I need help,” you plead with Mr. Wong. Maybe he can help you if Dr Strange can’t, he is the Sorcerer Supreme after all, supreme is the highest level, right? This might even be an upgrade from Strange. “I know this sounds crazy, but I think the universe is out to get me."
Wong just looks at you, expression unchanging, and okay, yeah, that was maybe not the best place to start. You take a deep breath, trying to figure out how to make yourself sound less paranoid.
"I've almost died 40 times since the beginning of the summer. I just want to know why this keeps happening and how to make it stop."
You dig into your bag, pulling out the folded map.
"We talked to a fortune teller in Chinatown, and she gave me this map. It led us here, and I'm really, really hoping you can help me."
Wong dips his head down to the map, "This is a celebrity home star map," he says, with a straight face and a neutral voice that only slightly betrays that he thinks you're batshit crazy.
“I know it sounds crazy, but-”
“Sanctum Sanctorum opened its doors for you, which means it wanted me to meet with you. I believe what you’re telling me.”
Oh thank god.
You tell him everything, rambling on as you try to explain what’s been happening and what little you know about it as best you can. The near death experiences, Miguel being a Spiderman from another dimension, the destruction of your apartment, the unnatural phenomena and the universe’s escalating attempts on your life.
Wong is quiet throughout, studying your face with grave concentration as you speak.
When you’re finally done, he sighs with deep weariness that emanates from the core of his soul. He looks down on his feet, tapping them in deep consideration.
"I have an idea,” Wong says cautiously, “I could perform a Multiversal Divination on you, that might give us a clearer idea of what we’re dealing with,”
“What does that mean?” Miguel asks, anger vibrating off his skin and boiling in his tone.
This man needs to calm down. You clearly need to take him to anger management, because since the moment he’s stepped into this place he’s been on the edge (even more so than usual).
“What does a ‘Multiversal Divination’ entail?” he continues, “Is that some magical mumbo jumbo that’s going to hurt her? Because if so we’re not–”
“I’ll do it,” you say, interrupting his objections, and you sidestep Miguel who is scowling, mouth already parted in yet another protest, to stand in front of Wong.
Wong looks to you and then Miguel, then back at you again, caught in the awkward stalemate, before you interrupt.
“Please, I need answers. Whatever it is, if it might help, I want to do it.”
Wong nods, stepping closer to you. "This will feel a little bit strange," he warns with the bedside manner of a patient doctor.
His hand comes to your collarbone and he places his palm there with a gentle push. There is barely any effort put into it, but you feel the force of it as if you had been slammed with the full force of a six ton truck. Your body wants to leap out of its skin. It is the sensation of being dumped in cold water from head to toe. A shock runs through your entire nervous system.
Images flash before your eyes, flickering by too fast for you to process. They’re vivid and bright. Glimpses of a scene: your apartment, your work, your commute home. Each of them expiring in a fraction of a moment before you have a chance to latch on and make sense of any of them individually.
You see yourself in picture after picture. Except slightly different in each. Short hair. Long locks. Curly.
In some you're wearing glasses instead of the contact lenses that you usually use. In others, you’re sporting the piercing you wanted to get at 16 but never did. Sometimes you have tattoos, sometimes not; occasionally you’re covered in them. Dyed hair, in every color of the spectrum: pink, blue, purple. A myriad of versions of you, of every variation of the decisions you could have possibly taken in your life.
There are pictures of memories you have had and not had. They rush in and flee before you're able to grab hold of one.
Captured moments of lifetimes you have never lived.
It's overwhelming. You don't understand what you're seeing. There’s pandemonium inside your head.
Then everything slows to a crawl.
The scene unfolding before you is one that you immediately recognize. An image that you'll never forget.
Window after window after window flashing you by. You know this view. Have seen it twice before. The same view of the Chrysler building as you were falling. But it's different this time.
The sky isn’t blue, nor is it gray. It’s a pink and an abnormal purple, a color you’ve never seen on it before and it looks both beautiful and completely wrong. There’s an angry tear in the sky, cracking at the edges with static. The whole of the sky looks like it is going to cleave in two and bring the whole world with it. Is this the future? Is it the past?
There's no pain, but somehow tears run down your cheeks uncontrollably.
In the distance you hear Miguel's voice, muted even though you know from that tone that he's furious and must be bellowing loud enough that it echoes through the walls. It sounds like you are underwater, and you have to strain to make out what he is saying.
"Why is she crying?" He's definitely shouting, voice raw and growling. Is this part of your memory or is it happening in the now? "You're hurting her."
The ground approaches.
"Stop! Stop!" Miguel's voice is shouting, but there's no way to stop this. Everything is going too fast this time around.
Miguel is here, tearing through the sky towards you. But you know it's too late. He's too far away. He can't save you this time.
Then everything does stop.
No images in your head. No noise in your ears.
Everything goes black, like the ending of a movie.
Then you hear a thud.
It's loud and close and real.
You snap yourself out of your fugue state, to see Miguel towering over Wong's body where the Sorcerer Supreme lies, limp and lifeless on the ground.
“What did you do!? Are you out of your mind?" you shout, running up to them.
Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Wong isn’t moving, not even blinking!
"He was hurting you!" Miguel roars.
"He wasn't hurting me, you big doofus!" you shout back, and it’s only then that the fury in Miguel’s eyes seem to abate.
"What's wrong with him?” you ask, bending down Wong’s limp body on the ground. “Is he dead!? Did you kill him?” There's a rising panic pushing inside your throat.
"He's just paralyzed."
"He’s para– What do you mean paralyzed? What did you do to him?"
"I just... I bit him," he uses a finger to part his lips slightly, pushing the upper one up just enough to reveal the sharp edges of his fangs. "There's toxins in them that can have a paralyzing effect."
You glance back at Wong. He’s still worryingly still.
“Is there some kind of way to un-paralyze him!?"
"It was just a small bite," Miguel says, ducking his head down sheepishly to stare at the floor, like a scolded boy. "I didn’t use that much venom... It’ll wear off. He shouldn't be out long. Maybe half an hour or so."
“I’m sorry. So, so sorry,” you tell Wong fervently, hovering over him. You can see his eyes tracking yours and the rise and fall of his chest, and you breathe a sigh of relief at the proof that he’s still alive. “Do you, um… Do you want me to help you up?”
“He’s not gonna want to move for a few more minutes,” Miguel interjects from behind you. “Moving will be incredibly painful until the venom wears off the rest of the way”.
What the actual fuck!?
You throw a glare at Miguel, as you loop an arm under Wong’s waist, “Well help me move him so he can be more comfortable.”
At your command, Miguel helps you prop the man up against the wall in what is (hopefully) a more comfortable position, and then you sit next to each other and wait.
"I can't believe you bit the Sorcerer Supreme," you mutter under your breath. “Miguel, you can’t just–” you cut yourself off, too frustrated to find the proper words.
"I'm sorry,” he says, grimacing at your scolding, looking regretful for once as he ducks down his gaze. “You looked like you were in pain".
Your anger subsides, if only slightly at his repentance.
“It still doesn’t make it okay. You can’t just attack someone like that! He was trying to help us.”
He doesn’t say anything more to that, just stares down at his feet in contrition.
The two of you sit in the silence.
Your mind goes back to the surreal experience you just had. The myriad of thousands if not millions of images that were flashing through your mind at the speed of light.
The warped shape of your world, the jarring images of it distorted and wrong, as it started to collapse.
Miguel had said that didn’t he? That the universe was going to ramp up its game and if it didn’t succeed, it would eventually self-destruct in its mission to get you.
It takes 26 minutes. The first sign that the toxins are wearing off is that Wong is able to wiggle his toes. His recovery accelerates after that, he's able to move his fingers, then the muscles in his face until he's able to form a grimace. He doesn't look happy, and you don't blame him.
After another five minutes or so, he's able to speak again.
"Strange way of expressing gratitude, literally biting the hand that helps you."
You get up on your feet to help Wong, and Miguel moves next to you.
“No, you stay there! Don’t move,” you order, and even though he scowls, Miguel complies.
You hunch over next to Wong, and help him sit fully upright. He stays seated, but dusts his robe off from the caked soot and fine layers of dirt.
“This has happened in other dimensions,” Wong tells you. “And if we don’t stop it, our universe will be destroyed.”
“How do we stop it?” you ask.
“The universe wants you dead. It won’t stop until it achieves its goal.”
Your stomach drops.
“So in order for this to stop… I need to die?”
There’s a look of barely contained fury burning in Miguel’s red eyes that seems to vibrate out of his skin and pounce. But he doesn't, this time he remains in place, visibly restraining himself, still following your orders.
“There is that option, or you will need to find the reason for why it wants to kill you. And you need to find it soon, because you don’t have a lot of time left. You will have even less time once the people of this world realize the threat you present to the continued integrity of this universe.”
“Are you threatening her!?” Miguel demands, and somehow even though you didn’t hear him move, he’s right behind you, red eyes glowing, shoulders rising, looming over Wong, ready to cut him down at any further hints that the man might be a threat to your safety.
Wong doesn't seem deterred in the slightest.
You have to give it to the Sorcerer Supreme. He's a brave one. It took you weeks before you stopped being intimidated by the man, and Miguel’s never bitten you.
“I am only telling you what the universe tells me. And it tells me that you do not belong here at all. The universe thinks neither of you belong here.”
You think back on fortune teller's drawing of the poorly drawn circle and stickfigure of you that’s speared with arrows.
"What if we went… somewhere else?" Miguel asks.
For the first time since he entered this house, his tone is no longer dripping with anger. “What if we left this universe and dimension?”
The image of white blankness enters your mind at his words. You shudder at the reminder. The cold numbness of the void and the sensation of nothingness. Dread fills your veins. A cold clammy sweat flashes hot and cold against your skin at the memory.
Wong tilts his head up in deep consideration. “That might work. This universe would slowly return to equilibrium with her gone. But… This will just start again in any new Universe. Most likely she wouldn’t be able to stay. She might have to leave every dimension she's in for the rest of her natural lifespan. A life spent always on the run.”
Wong pauses as he glances over to you with sympathy and concern in his gaze. “Is that something you would want?”
What is the alternative here? To lie down and die?
“Yes.”
“One month’s time, you need to find a way to leave this dimension before then.”
Back at your hotel that evening, you wake up to the sound of distress. Muffled whimpers and quiet moans.
By habit, your eyes roam the room, seeking out Miguel in the dark. He’s lying on the sofa from across the room and even in this distance you can make out that his body is writhing beneath the covers. But you’re groggy and too sleep-drunk to make sense of what you’re hearing or seeing.
There’s murmured noises from him, and it takes you far too long to understand what’s going on.
He’s having a nightmare.
Tugging off the blanket on top of you, you get up and scoot over to the end of the bed over to him. Miguel looks like he’s in pain. There��s a sheen of sweat on his forehead as he tosses and turns, face pinched in pain and distress. Now that you’re closer, you can make out words in the sounds he’s making.
“Quiero quedarme contigo. No te vayas, no te vayas,” he keeps murmuring.
He looks exhausted. Which, of course he is. He's been on constant alert trying to protect you. Fighting off supernatural weather phenomena, blocking hazardous furniture and fighting off charging hippos out of nowhere. Of course he's worn out.
“Shhhh, It’s alright.” you whisper to him, reaching out to gently stroke his arm, attempting to soothe him. “It’s okay.”
He groans unhappily in his sleep, burying his head into the cushion.
“Quiero quedarme conti–”
"Hey, hey, Miguel,” you tap insistently at his shoulder now. If you can’t soothe the nightmare away, then maybe you can at least wake him up out of it, “It's okay. Wake up."
This time his eyes slam open, wide with adrenaline and shock, and he shoots upright, head whipping from side to side as he scans the room. Every inch of him prepared to leap into a fight.
“What’s wrong? What’s–”
“You were having a nightmare,” you explain to him.
He stiffens at that, dropping his eyes to stare down at his lap unhappily.
“Shit, did I wake you?” he runs a hand over his face, then lays back down, “Sorry.”
Silence blankets the two of you, and you don’t know what else to say to him. Except just that you want him to be able to rest–truly rest–after the day, week and month you’ve both had. You don’t want him to have to go back to snatching moments of troubled, uncomfortable sleep on that stupid, too-small couch.
“You could come sleep on the bed with me,” you offer, “That couch is nowhere near big enough for you.”
"It's fine," he mutters, "It's been fine the last month, and it's fine now."
"It's not though. You're clearly not sleeping well. I should have asked you before. I'm surprised your back isn't already killing you—that sleeping position looked painful."
His head darts down, eyeing his own spread legs that are sticking out into the empty air from the bottom of the couch. But he doesn't concede the point.
"Please?" you try again, "It will make me feel better."
Apparently all you needed to do was ask, because Miguel immediately complies like your request was a decree. He gets up, pulling the quilt with him, his mop of curls in adorable disarray as he drags his feet over to the other side of the bed and flops down with a loud thump that makes the whole mattress bounce underneath you.
You can feel the pull of the sheets where his legs threaten to brush up against your bent knees, and you're beginning to realize you didn't think this through. Even in the big bed, there's only so much space, and he seems to be taking up most of it.
He's close, and you can't seem to peel your eyes away from the strong line of his throat. Can't help the way your body reacts. Your pulse starts to race, heart kicking up hard and fast against your ribs.
Miguel turns around to observe you with narrowed eyes. “You okay?”
Shit! Did he hear you? That timing was too on the nose. You nod at him a little bit too frantically and you sound high-pitched and skittish even to your own ears.
“Yes of course, why wouldn’t I be?”
“Your heart is beating really fast.”
Fuck. He could hear you. Of course he can, he has super hearing powers doesn’t he?
“I’m just tired,” you stammer out, wrapping the blanket close to your chest for layers as a shield from his super hearing.
Miguel doesn’t push it. He turns back around, letting his head drop down the pillow.
The distance between you has been growing smaller and smaller with each passing day together and you think you have been crossing an invisible line that you shouldn’t be crossing as of late.
You think of the closeness of him in the office, the weight of his arms on your waist as he held you in his lap. His eyes on you. The bare skin of his broad back casually revealed to you when he was changing. The same back that you find yourself staring up at in this moment.
“Go to sleep,” Miguel rasps from your side, and you nearly jump out of your skin in surprise.
You close your eyes, but somehow in the dark you become even more keenly aware of his presence in the bed with you. Your heart seems to skip a little bit faster as the seconds pass, each beat a little bit harder.
There's a quiet sigh, then a much louder exhale, as he turns back towards you in bed.
"What's wrong?" His voice is still gruff with sleep.
"I can’t fall asleep,” you say, staring up at the ceiling in the dark. “Can you talk? It might help me sleep."
He snorts with a laugh. The sound of it makes something pleasant skitter up the length of your spine. He's got a nice laugh. It's a shame he doesn't laugh often.
"What's so funny?"
"No, nothing. Just... some things never change." Even in the dim of the unlit room, you can see the smile on his lips.
"What do you want me to talk to you about?" he asks.
You tilt your head, considering it. Miguel rarely gives you a carte blanche to ask him for information. Logically, you should use this moment to seize a tactical advantage and ask him for all the salacious details that you know he’s been keeping from you. But as you wrack your brain for questions, the only ones that come to mind are disappointingly ordinary. You just want to know more about him. Small, silly, personal details, the way he seems to know everything about you.
"Tell me about where you're from," you request, "Your dimension. Your hometown."
He shifts on the bed, lying flat on his back until he’s staring up at the ceiling with you as he reminisces.
"It's called Nueva York. It's significantly more technologically advanced than this dimension. Definitely cleaner. People aren't as big of assholes as they are here. Public hygiene is way better, everything doesn’t reek of piss. Oh, and there’s not a rat epidemic in the public transportation system there."
His head turns to his side to look at your face, and he gives you a small mischievous grin as he continues. "Food is healthier. You don't get junk food there."
The words should be complimentary, but from his tone of voice and what you know of his eating habits, you think it’s probably a win for your dirty, rat-infested dimension.
"Lots of skyscrapers and neon-lights everywhere. It's colorful."
He pauses, as if he's struggling to find anything more to say about the place. Then his head tips to the side, meeting your eyes, and his gaze is soft.
“I'll take you there," he promises, voice quiet and warm and it makes something sweet and honeyed trickle inside your veins pleasantly.
“How?” you wonder.
His smile drops, replaced by an unhappy frown. “Not sure yet, but I’ll figure it out.”
“Can’t we just open up a portal like last time?”
He shakes his head.
"The last time I took you through the portal, it was meant to take us back to my dimension. But I built the parallel universe traversal device to transport me—and only me—through the multiverse."
He reaches out to you, fingers wrapping gently around your wrist. The contact makes your skin tingle, but you don’t pull away.
"I wasn't thinking last time. We can’t take the risk of winding up back in the void.”
He’s mumbling now, nearly asleep. His eyes half-shut as he blinks slowly, struggling to keep them open as he slowly blinks.
"Someone that disappears in the void, they'll be erased from existence and out of every timeline. No one will ever remember you or know you existed. It's as if you've never existed at all."
You eye the watch on your wrist. The slight sheen of the bed light reflecting against the shiny glass.
"Can we modify the watch?"
"Firstly, not a watch", he reminds you by rote as he fluffs up his pillow with his arm.
"And second..." he pauses, eyes drifting up to study the ceiling before he shakes his head, "I've tried. It doesn’t work. The power source isn’t powerful and your world is not technically advanced enough for me to build an upgraded self-sustaining fusion power source that would be needed. It’s how we ended up in the void.”
Worry burrows into your chest, and your gaze drops down from his face. It always feels like you’re taking one step forward and ending up two steps back. Futile and hopeless but that’s what you get for trying to fight against the will of the universe.
"Go to sleep," he says again, his hand coming to rest gently on top of your head, "I'll figure it out, don't worry.”
You smile, warmed by the comforting gesture and his reassurance.
“I won't let you get hurt this time."
…‘this time.’
The promise cuts through you like glass. Sharp and jagged and clawing its way into your chest until it hurts you to breathe.
Miguel is talking to you, but you don’t think it’s you he’s thinking of when he says the words.
He attacked Wong without a second of hesitation when he thought you were hurt. He's exhausting himself half to death to protect you. But you know that he’s not really doing any of this for you.
It’s not your comfort he was thinking of when he cradled your burnt hand and gently blew on your fingers. It’s not your love of egg tarts that makes him save the flaky pastries for you when the two of you go out for dinner. It’s not you—has never been you—that he’s seeing whenever his eyes linger on your face when he thinks you’re not paying attention.
You're riding on the emotional coattails of the other you. The unwavering loyalty that he had for her has transferred to you now that she's gone.
He must have really loved her.
There’s a sharp fissure in your chest, and you try to swallow down the thistle of needles that’s found its way into your throat, only to discover that your saliva tastes sour and bitter.
Closing your eyes, you can see an image of yourself smiling with him, laughing with him, holding his hand. Except it’s not you.
It’s her.
Other-you, with the wedding band and the happy life and– And somehow better hair too, the lucky bitch!
Except… she wasn't lucky, was she? She's dead.
She’s dead, and you still resent her for what she had with Miguel. It's such an ugly feeling.
You squeeze your eyes shut as hard as you can, but the image doesn’t go away. Nor does that acrid taste in your mouth. You can't help it. This irrational and childish madness is eating into the edges of your mind. You're envious of your other self.
God that’s fucked up.
Does someone like you even deserve to be saved at all?
Credits & Dedications: To @thirstworldproblemss for all the rubberducking we do together on this silly little story. Thank you so much for sitting with me and making this fun! I love you 234238472938492374923 x infinity and back again.
a/n: to be notified of new writing updates follow astroboots-writes and turn on notifs.
#why am i actually fucking sobbing#i’m sure it wasn’t even the full angst train#i’ll be in bits by the end#ok so#my mind is a bit blank bc i’m still reeling and crying and just…fucking sad#i love miguel’s taste for junk food and tantrums#really a man child#his business casual outfit tho#ooooooooooof#have we discussed the possibility that he’ll just unintentionally kill her with his hotness#bc it’s a possibility#when he calls her cielo my heart stops#i can’t even imagine what it does to her#i looove wong i’m so happy we got to see him#and that he’s the same blasé mildly irritated with strange character than in the films#an icon#who is falling through the skies? is it her in the future or nena’s death? or something else#aaah it’s killing me#they’re so cute together tho#i want to live in nueva york#sounds great#miguel o'hara#fic rec
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jealous!Simon is on my mind 24/7
even better if the two of you are secretly fucking bc he is scared of feelings, commitment, relationships, and blah blah blah…
and simon wasn’t used to feeling jealous. he had trained his emotions out of him long ago, or so he thought. but as he stood in the doorway, watching you stroll across the shared kitchen on the base, your back turned to him, the name "mactavish" boldly displayed on the long-sleeved shirt you wore, something twisted in his chest.
the sight of you wearing his shirt, so casually, stung in a way simon hadn’t expected. he cleared his throat, trying to sound indifferent, but the edge in his voice betrayed him. "that’s johnny’s shirt."
"i know." was the only thing you said, smirking since he couldn't see your face. you knew exactly what you were doing, but in that moment, you didn’t care.
"why is johnny's shirt on you?" simon asked, his voice low but tight with tension. he tried to keep his tone neutral, but the undercurrent of jealousy and frustration was hard to hide. seeing you in johnny’s shirt stirred something uncomfortable deep inside him, a mix of possessiveness and insecurity that he wasn't used to feeling. he hated how something so simple made his chest tighten, how the sight of you in someone else’s name made him feel like he was losing control of the one thing he was afraid to admit he cared about.
"oh, he gave it to me because i was cold," you said, pouting slightly as you turned around to face the only man you ever wanted "he is such a nice guy."
simon managed a slight nod, his mind blanking from the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside him. everything felt too much, too fast. meanwhile, you casually turned your back to him again, giving him another clear view of soap's name stretched across your shoulders as you began making your tea. the tiny grumble that escaped simon’s lips didn’t go unnoticed—it sent a wave of satisfaction through you, a small victory that made your day. you loved torturing him. and, after all, he did deserved it.
frustrated, he walked over to the sink, grabbing a glass of water, hoping it would cool the fire raging inside. but as he turned, his grip slipped, and the water splashed across your front. simon froze, watching the water drip down your shirt, half-shocked and half-relieved for the excuse to make the shirt disappear.
simon froze, his eyes glued to the water dripping down your shirt. after a beat of silence, he muttered, "well, guess you’ll need to take that off now. what a shame."
shocked, you watched as he put the glass down and left the room, still feeling the cold water seeping through the fabric. did he seriously just accidentally splash you and then walk out like nothing happened? that bitch.
*
later, as you slept in your bed, wearing your shirt this time, you stirred slightly at the feeling of someone’s arms wrapping around you. you didn’t even need to open your eyes or turn around—you already knew who it was. that familiar warmth could only belong to simon.
"simon?" you muttered groggily, barely able to make out the shape of him in the dim light. "what are you doing here?"
"shh, just sleep, pretty girl," he whispered softly, his breath warm against your ear. "i just wanted to apologize for how i acted earlier."
"i'm listening," you murmured, your voice barely more than a whisper.
simon’s arms tightened around you as he spoke. “i’m sorry for earlier. i know i’ve been pushin' you away and acting like an idiot. seein' you in johnny’s shirt... it just brought out this jealousy i didn’t want to admit i had. i hate feelin' like i’m not enough, or that someone else might have a piece of you. the truth is, i want you to be only mine. i can’t stand the thought of you being with anyone else. i just wanted you to know that, even if i messed everythin' up.”
“well, isn’t this a surprise? i didn’t realize it took me wearing johnny's shirt for you to admit your feelings.” you said with a hint of a smile, turning around to kiss him softly. simon sighed into the kiss, his arms wrapping around you with a sense of relief and affection.
simon pulled back slightly, his eyes intense as he rested his forehead on yours “i mean it, you know. you’re mine—only mine. no one else gets to touch what’s mine.” his voice was firm, yet tender, which made his words more meaningful.
"did you have a similar conversation with soap?" you asked, raising an eyebrow playfully.
simon grinned, leaning in even closer. “yep, told him to keep his wardrobe to himself unless he wanted a 'property of simon' label slapped on everything he owns.” he sealed his words with a gentle, lingering kiss, his lips tenderly brushing against yours as if to mark his claim in the most intimate way.
*
soap: so, i guess it worked?
y/n: your shirt got wet, but i got what i wanted. thanks, bestie.
soap: i think i got worse treatment from simon than the shirt did, but anything for my two lovebirds.
#simon ghost riley#simon ghost x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#simon ghost riley x reader#simon ghost riley x you#simon riley imagine#simon ghost riley x female oc#simon ghost x you#simon riley
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— stardust
the world is a vast place. in the grand scheme of things, humans are but a speck of dust; much like how you are sure you are nothing but a meagre speck of dust in the world he lives in, forever to be remained unseen. (if only you knew how you are the brightest star he'd ever laid his eyes upon.)
CONTAINS : gn!reader, 1.5k wc, royalty!au, contract marriage/marriage of convenience, fluff, smitten reca bc what would he be other than smitten, a little hint of bittersweet at the end if read between the lines aha...
A/N : ....i have a paper due monday. i havent started it. why do i do this to myself. (reca i love u can u not hear my cries and wails as fic after fic appears in my brain for u...)
Duke Reca of the northern territory; to many he is a well-accomplished noble, a young genius set for greater things, and the owner-slash-founder of the top theatre company. He is an idol — a role model to those who aspire to be more involved in the artistic side of the world.
To you, however, he is an absolute lunatic, the bane of your existence, and your contractual husband.
It's not like you had much choice. It was either: a) remain as a hollow puppet whose strings danced at your family's fingertips, or b) find some way to escape with outside power.
You, of course, chose the second option. Unfortunately, that somehow led to you meeting the young duke when out in the shopping district, trying to escape the suffocating presence of your family's knights accompanying you by running into a secluded alleyway, even if it was for but a momentary breather.
It was a whirlwind of a meeting... quite literally. Bodies flew; clothing tousled; breaths stolen. Well, at least for you it was like this. He, on the other hand, looked right as rain. (Lucky bastard.) You hadn't realised it was him at first, too absorbed in hasty apologies and the numbing bloom spreading across your backside like a wildfire (really, they ought to incorporate more padding in these flimsy clothes!), but when he uttered an apology of his own for not paying attention to his surroundings with an arm outstretched to help you stand, your mind all but blanked. What was someone of his status doing in a dingy alley? Didn't the newspapers report word of his self-confinement, having not stepped foot outside his manor in fervent preparation of his upcoming performance?
No, never mind all that; wasn't this a blatant opportunity being presented to you? An outside power that could help you escape the clutches of your family...
With gritted teeth, all sense of self-dignity was cast aside as you grasped his outstretched hand with both of your own, gazing into his widened eyes with your own narrowed ones.
"Your Grace, I know this is hardly the appropriate time nor place, but please... marry me!" Your words echoed within the enclosed space. Duke Reca blinked slowly down at you, and it was then you realised you never elaborated. "In... in a contractual marriage of convenience, of course."
"Oh?" he grinned, amusement and intrigue twinkling in his eyes. "And what is it you can offer me?"
"I..." Truthfully, there was nothing you could offer which would be beneficial to someone like him who had everything at the tips of his fingers. You were but a speck of dust in his world, merely floating and remaining unseen within his view. But even so, here you kneeled before him, his gaze wholly fixated on a speck of dust such as yourself. If nothing else, you at least had your desperation — a desperation to be your own person. "My lineage may be from that of a baron's, but I am confident I can be of use to you if you would permit it. So long as you accept my offer, I will do anything to aid you, whether that be through practical means or a performance you wish to see."
A beat of silence.
"Ha... haha... ahahaha!!"
And, as if things couldn't get any worse than a sore rear and disgruntled self, you were pulled out of your daze by a pair of gleaming carmine eyes, a maniacal grin, and his body, now kneeled just like you were, so very close to your own.
"That determination... how brilliantly you burn with such an expression!" The sheer glee which bled through his tone sent shivers down your spine, having never realised someone so esteemed had such a side to him. The duke breathed a breathy laugh and slightly backed up, his hands still holding your arms. "Alright, I look forward to seeing how brightly you will shine in your performance, my dear leading actor."
...Was it too late to back out and find an alternative solution?
Admittedly so, for the next thing you knew vows were declared and you were moved into the duke's residence. You could still remember your family's aghast expressions the moment you declared you were marrying Duke Reca and thus cutting ties with them. It was oddly freeing to see their contorted faces reveal their true nature.
Life as the duke's spouse was... something, to say the least. His servants and attendants almost seemed to have shed tears of joy at the revelation of their ever so lonely duke (their words, not yours) finally settling down and getting married, asking you questions such as how you both met, what drew you to their duke, who popped the question first, why you chose him of all people, so on so forth. It was... cosy. Something you admittedly weren't very accustomed to, but found yourself welcoming nonetheless.
One thing you never expected was for the duke to have a little pet of his own; a little toad dressed in a miniature beret and matching suit, at that. Assistant Director is what Reca had called her, and you think for someone so obsessed with the arts he ought to up his naming sense. She was also quite susceptible to compliments, something you discovered when commenting on the little toad's cute attire, with the duke's baffling translation of her bashfulness and her own compliment on your own looks. Apparently. You're not really sure, but you're inclined to believe it ever since she claimed a spot on your shoulder.
As the days-turned-weeks-turned-months bled into each other, you found yourself oddly lost at how well-adapted you have become of your new life and the duke's personality. From impromptu displays of affection both in and outside the manor to sporadic radio silence on his end when wholly consumed by his fervent passion for a project, you sometimes wonder just how you're still alive with the amount of heart attacks the man has given you.
But despite his... eccentricities, to put it lightly, there are times where you can't quite put a finger on certain expressions he would make when he thinks you're not looking. They're unlike his (once again, to put it very lightly) passionate eyes when rambling to you during mealtimes about an upcoming performance the troupe has; unlike the sheer mania he can exude when something truly sparks his inspiration; unlike the playfully smug grin he would give you when swooping down in dramatic flair to press a long kiss to the back of your palm; unlike the rare darkening of his expression that you cannot help but stiffen at when something or someone in the troupe doesn't quite match his expectations.
No. These ones are... soft. A kind of tenderness and unprecedented longing able to be identified if scrutinised close enough. It was evident in the ghost-like touches he would trail along your skin, as though afraid just a little more force would do irreparable damage. It was evident in the attention to even the most minute details, having everything from clothing to food to the decor suited to preferences you yourself never realised you had. It was evident in the way unadulterated fondness leaked through his tone when his unique terms of affection for you slipped through his lips when all was silent and you were supposed to be asleep.
"My dearest star..."
...Much like now, it would seem.
The bed dips by where your knees slightly bend, hidden under the beige covers. A familiar musky scent surrounds you not long after, and you find yourself involuntarily relaxing at the comfort it brings as your head further burrows into the pillow.
You want to stay awake, even if it's just for a second longer, to hear what he has to say to your less than conscious state. But, oh, his fingers threading through your hair and softly massaging your scalp and the gentle touch of his forehead against yours and the subtle comforting warmth that rolls off his body in waves does little to help you fight the sleep which easily takes over.
Oh, whatever! You'll just try and catch what he has to say next time.
Eventually your breathing evens out, only soft snores now heard within the large shared bedroom. Upon noticing this, Reca cannot stop the fond smile which lifts the corners of his lips, nor can he prevent the softening of his eyes as he continues to gaze at your sleeping form.
"My dearest [Name]," he whispers into the dead of night. Even now, several months later, he still cannot believe his luck to have run into you in that alleyway. It must have been fate which made him heed its call, urging him he would discover something sure to escape that terrible slump plaguing him for weeks on end.
Sure enough, it brought him to something irreplaceable; something he has been searching desperately for.
You.
And, with the tenderest of kisses pressed to your forehead that would put even the most sickening romantics to shame, he murmurs words of promise against your skin, an oath he swears to uphold no matter the obstacles which stand before him.
"In this life, I will ensure you have only the best of endings."
if you enjoyed this, reblogs and/or comments are greatly appreciated <33
#mr reca x reader#honkai star rail x reader#hsr x reader#mr reca x you#honkai star rail x you#hsr x you#PEOPLE CAN FIGHT ME ON DUKE OF THE NORTH RECA IDC IDC I WILL NOT BACK DOWN !!! NEVER BACK DOWN NEVER WHAT??? NEVER GIVE UP !!!#im sorry . royalty aus are my achilles heel... my roman empire...#also literally the first thought i had when his model was first leaked was 'HES THE DUKE OF THE NORTH !!! HE HAS THE HAIR AND SUIT !!!!'#his lc when it was leaked further solidified that idea 🧍♀️#anyway his cn voice <3333 literally have had it looped for the whole day i kid u not ;w;;;#it just... hit everything perfectly.... the itch is well-scratched..........
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