#which should have been way longer

[prtfrmhrtbrn]

•okk… i was insanityposting about this to my friends on discord but i have only one marauders friend and she’s not in that server so instead! it goes here. this is: my thoughts about jily <3 (because i love them and they deserved better)

•ok. to START. as much as i do like the nuance of ‘james thought he liked lily because he thought he was meant to like a girl, so he went all-in in first year, and by the time he realised, it would’ve been weird for everyone if he stopped’ i also think it’s overdone and boring so i am tired of it

•(this is about to be a run-down of how i think jily’s relationship developed through all of hogwarts, btw. we are talking year by year. just so we know)

instead, i think this: james had a silly puppy crush on lily for their first year and followed her around ALL the time. he would sit with her in the library while she was studying just to spend time with her and she was largely just like… at least he isn’t one of the purebloods calling me slurs… that doesn’t mean i like him but at least he isn’t bothering me. meanwhile james is sat there so excited she hasn’t kicked him out like wow isn’t she pretty!! and she’s studying wow isn’t she committed… and she always knows all the answers in class isn’t she so clever!!

and then SECOND YEAR by this point james is 12 and he has an early hit of the classic character arc ‘emo’ which lots of people think didn’t happen to him but i think you’re lying to yourselves. so james thought lily was pretty in second year, but A. that crush was gone and B. he didn’t want her to think he was super lame, so he stopped following her around. he did that thing where you just sit in rooms that other people are in, far enough that it’s not obvious you’re there for them, but close enough that they’ll notice you. basically he wanted her to think that he was cool but had no idea how to go about it (and lily had… very little response to this, at the start of the year she was like ‘it’s kinda weird he isn’t here’ but got over it pretty quick)

third year! third year is where it starts <3 the sirius/marlene arc begins (which results in a FEW realisations for both members of that couple, to say the least, and they don’t last more than a few months) and since sirius is friends with james and lily is friends with marlene they end up talking! and that year they just… become friends. james starts off with a ‘sorry i’ve been really weird these past two years’ and lily is like ‘yeah well you were 12 i don’t think i blame you’ and that year they are. just friends. and it works

fourth year: i think it starts with lily. i think lily is bi & knows she likes girls and boys and is very comfortable with that, and i think she tells james, because they’re friends, and she wants to be honest with her friends, and he says ‘you can do that? cool!’ and she’s like ‘that’s it…?’ and he’s like ‘yeah? i’m so happy for you! that must be awesome’ and lily is like ‘huh. yeah. i guess it’s pretty cool?’ and then frank longbottom walks by and james gets so distracted and lily is like oh… well i won’t take the realisation away from him… and finds herself oddly endeared and then she’s like. what emotion did i just feel towards this boy. and it’s fleeting but she knows it was there and now whenever she sees him she can’t stop thinking about that aching tender fondness. meanwhile james in fourth year is living his best life he has no idea he has a crush on frank but he is just having a great time with the marauders and he’s making new friends left and right. also getting a lot of detentions but that just results in more time spent with his boys amen

which eventually leads into fifth year, where james is on the train, and bumps into frank, who’s like ‘sorry mate’ and james is like ‘yeah don’t worry’ and wonders where that fluttery feeling has gone? and then he’s like OH oh my god. and so where does he go first but lily, and he’s like ‘you know your girls and boys thing? me too! isn’t that so fun?’ and lily gives him this Smile that’s so fond it makes james’ stomach flip and his eyes go wide and she tells him ‘yeah, that is pretty cool’ and james is like Oh Fuck. because it is the exact feeling he had towards frank that made him realise. and so fifth year is lily being like Oh he’s so annoying but it’s so endearing it’s not even annoying it’s just silly which is makes it more annoying… and james being like First year me did NOT get it but he sooo had the right idea

fifth year part 2, post the prank: james is pretty fucked up. and lily has no idea what’s happening but she knows the marauders aren’t talking and she’s close with remus and james, and they start to hang out as a group of three because peter sided with sirius (which i firmly believe. he was as much involved in it as sirius, only james & obv remus had no idea) and eventually it turns into little one on one hangouts that are so casual that both of them think they’re just going to die and then suddenly OWLs are approaching, so lily is like ‘james, do you want to study with me?’ and james is like ‘honestly i would love to, but you’re going to have to go back to calling me potter if you don’t want me to kiss you’ and lily looks at him, and thinks it through, and then she says, ‘okay, james,’ and boom. james just… kisses her. in the library. and they work and it works and oh. yeah, okay. so this makes sense more than anything ever has before. cool. relationship: unlocked!

sixth year is cool. it goes well; it’s easy. the marauders sort-of make up after the prank, which eventually leads into fully making up after the prank, at which point james brings them all together to announce that he is dating lily!!!!!! and the reactions go like this: remus knew, peter is like ‘i thought that was a first-year thing? but whatever makes you happy’ and sirius is like ‘you WHAT tell me everything’. and so james tells them everything anyone has ever had to tell about their partner (except personal things ie sexuality, home life, intimacy) and then the next day he finds lily and is like btw ‘i’m sorry but… the marauders are back together and they know about you and i… i just got so excited and blurted it out’ and lily is a little bit like Ffs but she knows how james is so she does him in a bit but ultimately is like ‘okay, it’s fine’ (after double and triple checking he didn’t tell them anything personal, which he definitely did not) because she’d been meaning to tell her friends anyway, really. and so, i re-iterate: sixth year is cool!

seventh year is stressful, but possibly even better. head girl/head boy dating? what could be better than that? and they’re revising for NEWTs, which fucking sucks, and they’re also trying to lead and guide the student body as the roles declare, but they’re getting through it together, and when lily gets stressed, james takes over as many of her head girl duties as he can, and when james gets stressed, lily does the same for him. and one night he’s utterly exhausted, and she says ‘i’ll cover for you, james, just ask, i always will,’ and he looks at her, has his Oh. moment, and just breathes, ‘i’m in love with you’. and lily is like. Oh. and her Oh moment is someone else’s Oh moment, and she grabs his tie and pulls him down and then says, ‘i love you, too.’ and so, yeah. in seventh year, they date, and get stressed, and love each other, and help each other out.

and then they graduate, and the ground feels slippery and uncertain, but lily feels more confident when james is by her side and james feels safer when he’s holding lily’s hand. and he’s still 18, but he’s nearly 19, and he’s been going out with lily for 2 years, which has to be enough, and he asks her to marry him. and lily is 19, but she hasn’t been for long, and she’s been going out with james for 2 years, and she doesn’t know if it’ll help anything, but maybe it doesn’t need to. and she says yes.

and they get married, and it’s beautiful, and wonderful, but james doesn’t even care, because he’s at the altar with lily, and not even his friends applauding could ever fucking understand that, and lily feels the same; feels like the love between them will only ever happen once, and even if they lose it, at least they had it to begin with. and they get married and they love each other and they have a child, and his name is harry james, and they love him, too.

yeah… that’s kind of where i trail off. i just think so many people discredit jily as some little infatuation from james, or comphet, which is so real and true but also!! i think they did love each other. and also they were bi4bi

no matter where you take your jily, whether it’s an in-school breakup leading to starchaser and marylily or pandalily or something else, or whether it’s an outside-school breakup where they never get married, or whether they get divorced (in which case you need to listen to this night has opened my eyes by the smiths- the dream has gone, but the baby is real, as morrisey said), or go for canon-compliant (shivers), or they live happily ever after and love each other and grow old together!! i think saying they never loved each other is really silly. because i think they did. and that love doesn’t have to be romantic, although i’ve described a romantic relationship between them here, but i think jily has a really strong bond between them. and i just wanted to put it out there. stop overlooking them!! they can date or be besties or be queerplatonic or whatever they want!!

anyway. if anybody has any jily fics that are lovely i am asking so politely to send them to me. and also politely asking the person who named them sunflower to kiss me gently and tenderly on the mouth. thank you for reading <3

[bumblingbabooshka]

When the only person who might understand what happened- understand. Not sympathize or empathize or comfort you but understand what happened, isn't there anymore. Or: 'A Man Made Me Do Something I Didn't Want To', for when you can't talk about it or look it in the eye [Patreon | Commissions]

[atopvisenyashill]

Thoughts on the Alysanne is Maegor's daughter AU? I feel like it has some interesting potential, and it vastly recontextualizes different parts of Jaehaehae (I do not like him sjsjsjs) and Alysanne's relationship (such as Jaehaehae's treatment of their daughters) but I wanna hear what you think about it!

I’ve touched on this a bit before but since you actually want to hear my thoughts, allow me to present to you my Jaehaerys Is The Goddamn Worst, And Alysanne Annoys Me Too: An Essay lmao but my answer is basically “yeah all of what you just said.”

I think it makes Alysanne much more palatable (to me) as a character because as she stands, she just fixates on forcing her daughters through these fucked up marriages at too young an age bc it traumatized her to be married and pregnant at 15 too but she’d never admit that being a willing participant in her own kidnapping by her brother-husband was the single worst thing that ever happened to her, and because Alysanne doesn’t want to admit it (and Jaehaerys would never see it as wrong or a mistake) F&B really shies away from delving into the fact that Alysanne is as deranged of a mother as Cersei is. So as she stands, she’s very flat to me because she’s presented very flatly and inconsistently. She’s so in love with Jaehaerys, she’s maritally raped by Jaehaerys, she’s a loving and doting mother, she forces her daughters into marriages when they’re the same too young age she was, she accuses her teenage girls of being scheming whores then gets angry when her husband accuses their teenage girls of being scheming whores, and worst of all we are just told “Maegelle tells them to make up so they do” so we don’t know why Alysanne gets over all of this. What is the point of riding a dragon when you never use that dragon to protect your daughters from unwanted teen marriages? We’re just not given a good enough justification for why her behavior is so weird and frustrating towards her daughters.

Make her Maegor’s daughter though…most of her behavior as an adult makes more sense. Like a worse version of Rhaenyra’s childhood almost - a father desperate for a son, but lowkey obsessed with his daughter, who makes all his hang ups about his parents the problems of every woman around him, except Maegor is out here blood sacrificing and torturing and starting wars and forcing babies on wives he discards quickly and brutally. Then here comes Jaehaerys on a white horse green dragon to save her from the horror her life has become, and he loves her so much he runs away with her even though Alyssa says they shouldn’t marry because people won’t like it. And they have beautiful children, and a beautiful marriage, and build a beautiful kingdom.

Then her pregnancies start getting dangerous. Gaemon, then Valerion, die. Alysanne thinks of the shriveled up mutants she called brothers, if Maegor’s taint has passed to her. Her perfect husband ignores her no, and forces Gael on her. Alysanne remembers that he said nothing to Rogar when Alyssa died, merely wept. Then her daughters start to die. Daella, Alyssa, Viserra, all within a few years. Then Jaehaerys makes Saera watch as he murders her boyfriend, calls her a whore, and says Alysanne cannot follow Saera to Lys. Alysanne thinks of Maegor torturing the Harroways over Alys’ presumed infidelity. Jaehaerys says he’s sorry, and her daughter badgers her into forgiving him, and she remembers how she helped Jaehaerys badger Alyssa into forgiving Rogar. Not two years later, Jaehaerys passes over Rhaenys. Alysanne thinks of how she was never enough for her father, how she felt so superior to Rhaena banished to Dragonstone and resented by Aerea, yet there she is dragging Gael away from court because she can’t stand to be with Jaehaerys. How her father was surrounded by dead women and dead babies and how Jaehaerys is surrounded by his own dead daughters, but surely she did the right thing, surely Maegor was worse, surely the realm is better off? Is he right to pass over Rhaenys? Is she enabling a man just as monstrous as her father? She will never decide, because Maegelle will guilt her about keeping Gael isolated at Dragonstone, and Alysanne will do as she’s told, just like Rhaena, and Alyssa, and Jeyne, Elinor, Ceryse, Alys, and Tyanna, just like every one of her daughters.

I do get why Alysanne is Alyssa & Aenys’ and not Maegor’s. The weird Targ babies, the line not descending from Visenya, Jaehaerys and Alysanne being held up as the perfect Targaryen couple specifically because they are brother and sister and dragon riders. I do even think canon Alysanne is likely traumatized by her time as a hostage on Dragonstone, and the ensuing war, and the trauma bond that caused with Jaehaerys, and it makes her idolize Jaehaerys, and then he isolates her at Dragonstone so he can swiftly and safely marry, groom, and knock her up. It’s not like,,,, a fun time, and it’s enough to make anyone crazy and weird about their daughters, but I think having her father be Maegor makes Alysanne herself much deeper because it gives her, as the most beloved Targaryen queen, a blood tie to the most hated Targaryen king, and a marriage to the most beloved Targaryen king. It fits better with a lot of the themes of the main series (again, imo) - forcing the spotlight on the outsiders to see how the affect the story from behind the scenes. The fall of Aegon’s sons, and The Long Reign, not told from the PoV or to serve the PoV of any of the kings or princes, but of the queen that tied them all together.

[gingerswagfreckles]

Well they caught him. If he wasn't the exact kind of person tumblr loves, the conspiracy theories about this being a random person being framed would have continued to spread. But he's an attractive 26 year old white man who was caught carrying a manifesto about corporate America and has an internet history that matches up with tumblr's general politics. So everyone is going to get excited about how he's a martyr and go back to acknowledging reality in that there isn't a conspiracy to frame the wrong guy.

The discussions over whether or not this man should be lionized as a hero are honestly not as relevant as the comfort with which people are going to drop the conspiracy theory they would have been fully committed to if this man's politics turned out to be nuts. The ease with which the userbase of this website switches between realities based on whether or not they confirm their biases is really alarming. I just hope people understand how weird it is to claim a random person is 100% going to be framed by the FBI on one day, and then drop that by the next day when it becomes clear that the person being "framed" is the exact kind of communist you had hoped.

[hazellvsq]

i've put some thought into it because i LOVE frank and his son of neptune arc especially but like...did his mom need to be dead for it? i'm so back and forth on this like sacrifice and duty are obviously big parts of his arc but i feel like he could have had the same angst if his mom was just absent. idk. also his mom died SIX WEEKS before son of neptune which no one remembers because he doesn't behave like someone who's mom died six weeks ago (or like someone who only learned about being a demigod six weeks ago).

[deadqueernoldor]

Thinking thoughts about those from Cuivienen and how they later treated the Valar, especially after Cuivienen was destroyed.

I imagine a foundation of sorrow and a layer of betrayal and pettiness. They had promised safety. And how did it turn out? Kin of Tata and Tatie their first leaders, slain in Valinor by the Dark Hunter from which the Valar promised protection in Valinor.

And then, the War of Wrath comes and with it the destruction of Cuivienen.

If any of those were re-embodied in Aman, I wonder if they make it a point to always turn their back to Valar and Maiar. I wonder if they only speak in the tongue they had first devised all those millennia ago and spoke in Cuivienen before time and different kindreds changed the tongue, not Sindarin or Quenya from the Great Journey's time or later. I wonder if they sing songs in their ancient tongue, songs about the beauty and unsullied health of Cuivienen every time any of the Ainur are near.

I wonder if the Valar feel any shame when those who they once looked upon in wonder and love gaze back at them with indifference or disgust.

[nyxofdemons]

this was going to be like a mile long essay but i just realized the most concise way to say it is that "it feels like a retcon that blitz has been so resentful and hostile towards fizz all this time since he was supposed to feel guilty" is simply not a good criticism when we have been shown, time and time again, that blitz's number one defense mechanism when he feels guilty or judged or attacked is to lash out, to deflect and ignore all his responsibility, and to shift the blame to someone else. that's like. his defining character flaw

[leah2eroes]

tumblr stopped being fun at some point in the last like 3 weeks. i hope it comes back. i feel awful.

[daffodils-and-bonfires]

[thedandelionresistance]

Repeat after me: something being unhealthy or otherwise causing the person doing it distress does not make it morally wrong.

(This is part of healthism.)

[nostalgia-tblr]

i am catching up with my 'chapters i have written ahead point' on this car fic and this is alarming as i don't want it to suddenly get stuck. i need to write the rest of it fast but i have talked myself into thinking it's a bit overwrought and cringey. so now i can't get words written. fuuuuuuuuckkkkkk.

[harvestmoth]

heres my one page thesis on why hinomori mafuyu real

[icewindandboringhorror]

........creachure

[marinsawakening]

I own a Wii and Twilight Princess at this point btw. I could set it up at any time. But what if. Instead of doing that. I just played more Majora's Mask.

[sallykie]

I've decided. I don't like the HTTYD movie sequels' xenophobia era. I don't think the themes should have gone that way.

[seungminnnie]

.